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Speaker 1: While the countdown is on for the Georgia Senate runoff dates.

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Speaker 1: Request your absentee ballot now, please, because December seventh is

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Speaker 1: the voter registration deadline. Did you hear me? I said?

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Speaker 1: December seventh? If you have not registered, that is your deadline.

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Speaker 1: December fourteenth through the thirty first is early voting. In

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Speaker 1: January fifth. Of course, twenty twenty one is election day.

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Speaker 1: We are voting for Reverend Raphael Warnock and John ausof Georgia.

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Speaker 1: Come on, let's go, all right, let's show him. We

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Speaker 1: got something to prove, something to show. We need to

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Speaker 1: continue our fight. Yes we do. They need to be

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Speaker 1: in DC, yes they do. Right, we can do it,

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Speaker 1: all right, switching gears. Now it's time for the Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 1: If you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,

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Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey

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Speaker 1: FM dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could

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Speaker 1: be reading your letter live on the air, like we're

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Speaker 1: gonna read this one right here, right now. That's for you, Jay.

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Speaker 1: All right, ladies and Gentlemen's time for the Strawberry lettle

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Speaker 1: My good friend Shirley straw Theory thank you, junior subject.

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Speaker 1: Election Day was the worst day of my life. Dear

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Speaker 1: Stephen Shirley. I'm a twenty seven year old woman and

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Speaker 1: I have three children by my ex boyfriend. I say

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Speaker 1: X because we just broke up on election Day. We

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Speaker 1: had been together for nine years and started a family together,

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Speaker 1: but things started going downhill recently. A few years ago,

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Speaker 1: we moved to a new city and we both had

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Speaker 1: great jobs and we opened a small business together. We

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Speaker 1: were finally getting the financial freedom that we needed for

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Speaker 1: our family, so I thought it was a perfect time

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Speaker 1: for us to get married. I was so wrong. I

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Speaker 1: found out on election day that he was cheating on

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Speaker 1: me with one of our employees, and I was shocked,

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Speaker 1: but not surprised. I told him to get out and

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Speaker 1: I put all of his clothes outside on the porch.

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Speaker 1: The next day, he went public with his new girlfriend.

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Speaker 1: He didn't take my feelings or the kid's feelings into consideration.

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Speaker 1: He moved in with his new girl and her child.

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Speaker 1: He thinks I should accept everything and move on, but

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Speaker 1: I already have a problem with the co parenting, and

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Speaker 1: he left me with our shared bills and living expenses.

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Speaker 1: We have three children that no longer have a father

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Speaker 1: in the home, and he expects them to come stay

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Speaker 1: with him at this other woman's house. This is all

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Speaker 1: this all just happened on election day, and he's already

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Speaker 1: pressing me to see the children. I told him, no,

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Speaker 1: it's too soon, and he went off on me. My

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Speaker 1: question to you is what do I do now. It's

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Speaker 1: the best way to co parent in this situation. I

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Speaker 1: want to remain civil with him, but this is too much. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: this is way too much. First of all, I am

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Speaker 1: sorry that this happened on election day, and I hope

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Speaker 1: this does not mean you're not going to go out

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Speaker 1: and vote in everything. We gotta get that straight. It

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Speaker 1: just happened on that day, Okay, but don't let election

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Speaker 1: day be dramatic for you or anything like that. Go

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Speaker 1: ahead and go and go vote. And I'm sorry that

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Speaker 1: he did this to you and the kids. I really am. Yeah, Steve,

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Speaker 1: I said that because you know, the election day, whenever

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Speaker 1: she thinks about it. Now, she's going to think about

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Speaker 1: the breakup, you know that association. I guess the first

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Speaker 1: thing I would do. The first thing I would do

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Speaker 1: is file for child support because he's out, he's living

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Speaker 1: with someone else and their child. File for child support,

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Speaker 1: because he's right, you should move on. You said you

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Speaker 1: guys had great jobs, you have a business and all

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Speaker 1: of that, so um, you know, file for child support.

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Speaker 1: Make him start paying now, and you need some kind

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Speaker 1: of financial help with the children. If this is how

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Speaker 1: he treats you after nine years and three kids, he

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Speaker 1: would have been a crappy husband anyway. I mean, you know,

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Speaker 1: so it's it's a good thing you didn't marry this guy.

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Speaker 1: He's disrespectful and you're right, this is all too soon.

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Speaker 1: He moved in with this woman the next day, and

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Speaker 1: this woman is your employee. I can see why I

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Speaker 1: would be shocked and surprised. This woman is out of

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Speaker 1: control and out of order. You haven't had time to

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Speaker 1: process any of this because he's already moved in and

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Speaker 1: moved on. Thank god you didn't marry him. He's a loser.

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Speaker 1: I just think, and just remember when it comes to

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Speaker 1: the kids, don't let them stay away from their dad

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Speaker 1: too long. Okay, don't punish him by using the kids.

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Speaker 1: You know some women do that when they're bitter. Please

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Speaker 1: don't do that. Go through the court system, get full

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Speaker 1: or joint custody and just try to make this as

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Speaker 1: painless and as possible for the kids. You know, if

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Speaker 1: you didn't have three kids involved, it would probably be

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Speaker 1: maybe a different response for me. But you got to

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Speaker 1: be mindful of the children. You really really do in

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Speaker 1: this situation. But first of all, make sure that he's

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Speaker 1: going to pay some child support. That's number one for me.

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Speaker 1: Steve wow Wo, This letter right here is really a

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Speaker 1: trip because I'm gonna have to tell you something. System

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Speaker 1: You're twenty seven years old with three kids by your

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Speaker 1: ex boyfriend because y'all broke up on election Dick that day.

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Speaker 1: Y'all been together nine years and started a family together.

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Speaker 1: Now let me stop right here. Three kids, nine years.

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Speaker 1: You waited too long for a commitment. Now, I know

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Speaker 1: this is wide over the damn but I'm just talking

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Speaker 1: to women out there who are in similar situations. You

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Speaker 1: can't just play house with these men like this, because

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Speaker 1: when you get to the point where it's time to

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Speaker 1: make a decision where he did, where he gonna just

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Speaker 1: go his own way, that has to be a consequence

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Speaker 1: for that. Seeing one thing about marriage is it makes

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Speaker 1: you fight a little bit harder. It makes you have

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Speaker 1: to consider way with decisions adverse actions. Marriage causes you

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Speaker 1: to pause and think about the cost or the repercussions.

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Speaker 1: But you don't have that because you waited too long

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Speaker 1: to get it. You know, you just I'm sorry, y'all.

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Speaker 1: Moved to a new city, great jobs, got the financial

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Speaker 1: freedom you needed. So you thought, and you thought it

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Speaker 1: was a perfect time for us to getting married. This

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Speaker 1: this the first time you thought it was a good

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Speaker 1: time to get married. Nine years and three kids later,

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Speaker 1: this is the perfect time. See that's what I mean.

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Speaker 1: You know you and you say I was so wrong.

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Speaker 1: And then you found on election day he was cheating.

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Speaker 1: And we'll get into that. Well, yeah, we'll have heard

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Speaker 1: two if Steve's response coming up at twenty three minutes

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Speaker 1: after the hour. Today's subject election day was the worst

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Speaker 1: day of my life. We'll get back into it right

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Speaker 1: after this. You're listening to show, all right, Steve, Come on,

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Speaker 1: let's recap today's Strawberry letters objacked. Election Day was the

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Speaker 1: worst day of my life. This is a letter about

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Speaker 1: this twenty seven year old woman who I really feel

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Speaker 1: for the hast three kids by her ex boyfriend. And

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Speaker 1: she say X because they broke up on election Day.

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Speaker 1: Now they've been together nine years and they started a family.

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Speaker 1: I said early, and I'll reiterate, three kids, nine years.

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Speaker 1: You waited too long to get a commitment. See, guys

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Speaker 1: can just walk away from you when ain't No commitment

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Speaker 1: when you're married is different. You got to figure it out.

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Speaker 1: You got to do some arithmetic for you leave. You

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Speaker 1: gotta get some stuff figured out. You got to file

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Speaker 1: it's consequences. You can't play house with people like this man.

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Speaker 1: You just can't. I'm sorry, that's not the way it's

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Speaker 1: really set up. And then you run into a guy

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Speaker 1: like this. Now, after y'all moved to a new city,

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Speaker 1: you got the financial freedom you thought, and you thought

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Speaker 1: it was a perfect time for y'all to getting married,

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Speaker 1: three kids and nine years later. This. I know this

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Speaker 1: is not the first time you bought this subject up.

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Speaker 1: I know it's not the first time you thought it

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Speaker 1: was a perfect time. Oh, he'd been telling you, not chet,

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Speaker 1: not chet, not chet, we gotta get it together, we

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Speaker 1: gotta get together. Well, now you got it together, and

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Speaker 1: you thought it was perfect time. And then you said

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Speaker 1: I was so wrong. You found out on election day

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Speaker 1: that he was cheating on me with one of our employees.

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Speaker 1: I was shocked, but not surprised. Shocked and surprised kind

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Speaker 1: of sound like the same thing to me. So I

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Speaker 1: don't know what you meant by that. I don't know

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Speaker 1: if you were shocked when you found out, but you

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Speaker 1: wasn't that shocked. Obviously felt something was going on between them.

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Speaker 1: Obviously there's been some infidelity before. Yeah, yeah, obviously for

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Speaker 1: you to be shocked but not surprised because obviously, probably

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Speaker 1: I'm saying this, I don't know this, but he's probably

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Speaker 1: done it before. I told him to get out, put

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Speaker 1: all his clothes outside on the porch. Next day he

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Speaker 1: went in public with his new girlfriend. He's so he'd

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Speaker 1: been just waiting on the house. Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh

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Speaker 1: you put me out. I'm in boom. He didn't take

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Speaker 1: my feelings on the kid's feelings any consideration. No, he didn't.

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Speaker 1: He moved in with his new girl and her child.

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Speaker 1: He thinks I should accept everything and move on, and

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Speaker 1: that's hard to do because you were shocked, but he

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Speaker 1: wasn't surprised. So I already have a problem with coparing,

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Speaker 1: and he left me with our shared bills and living expenses.

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Speaker 1: We have chio children that no longer have a father.

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Speaker 1: At home, and he expect him to come stay with

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Speaker 1: him at this other woman's house. Okay, See, I don't

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Speaker 1: know what states this happened in, but in most states

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Speaker 1: there's this thing called common law. And if you've been

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Speaker 1: together with somebody and you take him to court, you

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Speaker 1: not only can get some type of child support, but

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Speaker 1: you probably qualified out for some type of spousal support

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Speaker 1: even though you weren't legally married. But no man can

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Speaker 1: leave you with a set of shared bills and living

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Speaker 1: expenses and just going about his way. That's not a

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Speaker 1: court in the world that's gonna let a man get

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Speaker 1: away with that. I can promise you that. So you

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Speaker 1: have a lot of angles you can take, and you

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Speaker 1: should take them, because now he expects them to come

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Speaker 1: and stay with him at the other woman's house. Now,

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Speaker 1: Shirley got a point about you don't want to use

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Speaker 1: the kids as pawns and keep the kids working their father.

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Speaker 1: But hold up, dog, you can't have you can't can

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Speaker 1: eat it too. Now you didn't want the family, remember,

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Speaker 1: now all of a sudden you want the family. So

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Speaker 1: now women women, women gonna and you ain't paying no

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Speaker 1: bills around here, You ain't helping out it's kind of

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Speaker 1: hard dog. Yeah, and this all just happened on the

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Speaker 1: left and day. That's yeah. Now, Shirley say, just keep

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Speaker 1: voting no matter what. We don't even really give a

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Speaker 1: damn about the election in this way. Election. Well, she

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Speaker 1: mentioned that, Sherley, and I just wanted you to tell

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Speaker 1: Hoody that voting what's important him if they don't have

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Speaker 1: an election, that unless stay in Georgia. Her ass ain't

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Speaker 1: got to vote for me. It's always important in Georgia.

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Speaker 1: She gotta get ass back down there because you got

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Speaker 1: from Georgia. You know. I told him, no, it's too soon,

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Speaker 1: and he went off on me. He's been pressing me

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Speaker 1: about seeing the kids. My question to you is what

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Speaker 1: do I do now? What's the best way to compare

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Speaker 1: it in this situation. Shirley was right about it. You

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Speaker 1: got to let him see the kids. But I want

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Speaker 1: to remain civil with him. But he wasn't civil to you.

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Speaker 1: What see, y'all, y'all see you you're being civil some

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Speaker 1: but sometimes you have to make the other person be civil. See,

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Speaker 1: if he was civil to you, he pay his part

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Speaker 1: of the shared bills, he would pay his part of

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Speaker 1: the living expense. I'm assuming y'all room, y'all got a house,

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Speaker 1: y'all got a house together something. He just am bouncing.

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Speaker 1: Now he living with this other girl in this other baby. No,

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Speaker 1: you have to help him be civil. You have to

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Speaker 1: take him to care for child support and spousal support.

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Speaker 1: And once your lawyer explains that he up and left

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Speaker 1: with another woman and a child, didn't, he gonna have

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Speaker 1: to pay all these bills. Okay, So now that's what

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Speaker 1: I would do if I was you, and you do

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Speaker 1: have to move on because he's gone. Yeah, yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 1: That's the reality of it. He is gone, He ain't

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Speaker 1: coming back. He to move in with her. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: a damn all right. Thank you, Steve. Post your comments

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Speaker 1: on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve RVFM, on it, Intagram,

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Speaker 1: and Facebook, and please don't forget to check out the

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Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter podcast on demand now coming up at forty

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Speaker 1: six minutes after the hour, We're gonna have some sports

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Speaker 1: talk with who Junior Why after this. Yeah, you're listening

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Speaker 1: to this Daive Harvey Morning Show.