WEBVTT - Does Weight Loss = Happiness? Nope.

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<v Speaker 1>I won't let my body out out well everything that

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<v Speaker 1>I'm made do. Won't spend my life trying to change.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm learning to love who I am again. I'm strong,

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<v Speaker 1>I feel free, I know who every part of me.

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<v Speaker 1>It's beautiful and now will always out with if you

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<v Speaker 1>feel it with yours in the air, she's some love

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<v Speaker 1>to the boom. I am there. Let's say good day

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<v Speaker 1>and did you and die out? Happy Saturday? Outweigh fam,

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<v Speaker 1>you know what I want to talk about today with

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<v Speaker 1>Kat here. Cat Defada is joining me. She's a licensed

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<v Speaker 1>therapist specializes in eating disorders. Lisa will be back soon.

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<v Speaker 1>By the way, I hope y'all are following along on

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<v Speaker 1>her Instagram with her sweet baby. I loved seeing her

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<v Speaker 1>as a mom. You can check her out. She's at

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<v Speaker 1>Lisa hame h a y I am and Cat is here,

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<v Speaker 1>and so I thought, I make this opportunity to run

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<v Speaker 1>something by her, which is a mental state or like

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<v Speaker 1>a world that I lived in for a long time.

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<v Speaker 1>My brain was constantly stuck in this cycle of my

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<v Speaker 1>life will be better when I lose five pounds, or

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<v Speaker 1>if I could just lose ten pounds and everything would

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<v Speaker 1>be fine, And so I was constantly chasing that weight loss.

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<v Speaker 1>And I recently got back from a big work event

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<v Speaker 1>where we have this huge festival in Vegas and I've

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<v Speaker 1>been doing that every year for ten years or so,

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<v Speaker 1>and I thought, wow, I went on this event and

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't have any of that pregame mentality where it's like, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>i gotta lose five pounds so that i can show

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<v Speaker 1>up and be my best self, where I've got to

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<v Speaker 1>do this cleanse before I go do work, because that's

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<v Speaker 1>just the world I lived in, and I didn't do

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<v Speaker 1>any of that. I didn't have the I was in recovery,

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<v Speaker 1>but I didn't have the opportunity to go do anything

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<v Speaker 1>because well there wasn't much going on. But now that

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<v Speaker 1>we're getting back to quote unquote normal in a sense

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<v Speaker 1>and events are going to start picking up, I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>this is the way to do it, because I'm no

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<v Speaker 1>long or thinking Okay, I can show up to that

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<v Speaker 1>if I lose five pounds or because if I lose

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<v Speaker 1>five pounds, I'm gonna be yes like everything you're giving

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<v Speaker 1>me these eyeballs, like I'm crazy person. But I can't

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<v Speaker 1>be the only person that was living in that constant

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<v Speaker 1>state of I'll be happier if for I'll perform better

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<v Speaker 1>at work if I and it was all weight related

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<v Speaker 1>or if my stomach was flat or this or that,

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<v Speaker 1>like everything had to do with how I looked, and

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<v Speaker 1>somehow restricting for a whole week before I had a

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<v Speaker 1>work event helped me think I looked better. Well, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>giving you those eyes because I'm like, I'm wondering in

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<v Speaker 1>that time, what was going to be different if you

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<v Speaker 1>lost five pounds. We said everything will be better, things

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<v Speaker 1>will be better. I don't know. It was a but

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<v Speaker 1>it was on heavy rotation and I thought I everything

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<v Speaker 1>would be different. It was very toxic, But I also

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<v Speaker 1>wonder with that, so what would be different everything? Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>what messaging? Everything? What messaging do you have around you

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<v Speaker 1>that's helping you believe that everything is going to be

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<v Speaker 1>better if I have a stomach because everywhere you turn

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<v Speaker 1>you see messaging that if you diet and lose weight,

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<v Speaker 1>everything will be better. Yeah. I gave this to an

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<v Speaker 1>assignment to a client one time because I just was like,

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<v Speaker 1>this is fascinating. If you go look at ads for products,

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<v Speaker 1>any product, it could be orange juice, it could be mascara.

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<v Speaker 1>Literally any product. You open a magazine and we look

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<v Speaker 1>at ads. What are you seeing in those ads? Typically? Well,

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<v Speaker 1>then white person? Yeah? Happy? How happy? Do this look happy? Yes? So,

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<v Speaker 1>but I don't even notice that. I'm like, oh look

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<v Speaker 1>how yeah. So there's two things that they are yea

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<v Speaker 1>and I. We've gotten more diverse than are. And I

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<v Speaker 1>will give credit to advertise for seeing more inclusive, but

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<v Speaker 1>for a lot of times and I can't even and

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<v Speaker 1>I I am a on the thinner side white person,

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<v Speaker 1>So what a privilege for me to in up and

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<v Speaker 1>see someone that actually kind of looks like me. I

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<v Speaker 1>can't imagine for all the years people have had to

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<v Speaker 1>open up and see somebody or someone that looks absolutely

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<v Speaker 1>nothing like them. So I just want to take a

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<v Speaker 1>side note to recognize that. And we are making huge

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<v Speaker 1>shifts to that. But I think that speaks to like

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<v Speaker 1>everything around me that I'm seeing is this image and

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<v Speaker 1>they look happy or they look successful, they have the

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<v Speaker 1>life I want, so to have that I must look

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<v Speaker 1>like that. Yeah, I'm glad you brought up the happiness

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<v Speaker 1>because now I did answer you with everything, But I

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<v Speaker 1>think the narrative and thankfully it's been a long time

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<v Speaker 1>since I've had that in my head and I don't

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<v Speaker 1>want to go back to that. But yes, I will

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<v Speaker 1>be happier, so therefore everything will be better. My relationships

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<v Speaker 1>will be better. I'll be nicer and more fun because

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<v Speaker 1>I'm happier. My husband will like me more, my job

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<v Speaker 1>will do better because phil pressure to look a certain way,

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<v Speaker 1>and it goes on and on and on. And I

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<v Speaker 1>would also wonder, like what is that level of happiness? Like, well, no,

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<v Speaker 1>I tell you what. I was love very happy because

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<v Speaker 1>I hadn't eaten in three days. It's just like almost

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<v Speaker 1>as dangling carrot in front of you that you are

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<v Speaker 1>like keep chasing, but you never get closer to it.

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<v Speaker 1>So I want that carrot. That's the happiness, So I'm

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<v Speaker 1>gonna chase it. And how I'm gonna chase it is

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<v Speaker 1>through juicing and diet and exercise in this and all

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<v Speaker 1>of that. But it's almost like it's getting a little

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<v Speaker 1>bit further away because let's say, I mean, this is

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<v Speaker 1>a story that I don't know if you've talked about

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<v Speaker 1>this on here, but I talked about it all the time.

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<v Speaker 1>Is if I lose five pounds, I'll be fine, I'll

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<v Speaker 1>be happy. That'll be whatever. Okay, you lose those five pounds,

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<v Speaker 1>then what Oh, then you're chasing five more. Now I

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<v Speaker 1>need a tone, or okay, now I need to get botox,

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<v Speaker 1>or okay, I think I'd be happier if I was blonde,

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<v Speaker 1>or maybe a should get the colored contacts. If we're

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<v Speaker 1>looking for what we look like to give us happiness,

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<v Speaker 1>we can always change what we look like. And there's

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<v Speaker 1>if there's always going to be something that you are lacking.

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<v Speaker 1>Because we're comparing ourselves to all these other people and

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<v Speaker 1>we see all the things we like about them. We

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<v Speaker 1>don't see as much of their perfections as we see

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<v Speaker 1>in us. So there's always going to be something. And

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<v Speaker 1>we often talk about brain space and what and needing

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<v Speaker 1>disorder can do to your brain space. It consumes it,

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<v Speaker 1>it takes it over, it sets up shop, and that

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<v Speaker 1>is basically all you think about, and then relationships suffer

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<v Speaker 1>and that doesn't lead to happiness. You know, you may

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<v Speaker 1>think that you're making progress because say you are tracking

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<v Speaker 1>your weight, you have lost the weight, but then what

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<v Speaker 1>But for me, that's all I was thinking about. When

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<v Speaker 1>can I work out? How long can I work out?

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<v Speaker 1>Sometimes working out twice, like I wasn't cultivating relationships. I

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<v Speaker 1>wasn't enjoying meals with families. I would be out to

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<v Speaker 1>dinner if I was in Let's use l A for

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<v Speaker 1>an example. I can speak of a very specific time

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<v Speaker 1>where I was in l A for a work event

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<v Speaker 1>and I knew i'd be on a red carpet, and

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<v Speaker 1>I was hanging out with a lot of friends. I

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<v Speaker 1>think even like Mary was there and our other friend Kara,

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<v Speaker 1>and I think my husband was even in town, and

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<v Speaker 1>Bobby was there, and we all went out to eat

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<v Speaker 1>and I took my green juice and everyone ate and

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<v Speaker 1>I drank my juice, and so that wasn't happiness, but

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<v Speaker 1>my brain was consumed with it. So I literally saw

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<v Speaker 1>no problem with it. I thought, yeah, I'm showing up

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<v Speaker 1>to this restaurant and I pulled my juice out of

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<v Speaker 1>my purse, and I didn't get to enjoy everything with

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<v Speaker 1>everybody else. That was my routine before an event. That's

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<v Speaker 1>what I did. I juiced, And on my four Things podcast,

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<v Speaker 1>I would recommend that other people do that too, And

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<v Speaker 1>I'm so thankful to be in a different place. But

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<v Speaker 1>I would tell people, hey, you know I mean, and

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<v Speaker 1>this is a saying from Dion Sanders, and I think

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<v Speaker 1>it is funny and take from it what you will.

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<v Speaker 1>But he was an athlete, but he's like, hey, if

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<v Speaker 1>you look good, you feel good, feel good, you play good.

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<v Speaker 1>If you play good, they pay good. So that was

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<v Speaker 1>sort of my mentality with juicing. And I don't think

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<v Speaker 1>he meant any harm by that saying, but in my

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<v Speaker 1>mind I was like, well, in order to look good

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<v Speaker 1>and feel good, I need a juice. So and then

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to show up and perform my best because

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<v Speaker 1>I'm feeling confident, and then I'm gonna do are at

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<v Speaker 1>my job. Yes, I don't think that's that bad of

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<v Speaker 1>a saying. I think that's not. Well, what does look

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<v Speaker 1>good mean? And that goes back to like what are

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<v Speaker 1>you seeing out in the world. That's that's in quotes good. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>in this place of recovery, we get to decide what's good.

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<v Speaker 1>So if I look good, I feel good. Okay, Well,

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<v Speaker 1>looking good for you back then was having a body

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<v Speaker 1>of a neating disorder, right, So that might be shifting

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<v Speaker 1>for you now, so you can still think you look good,

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<v Speaker 1>so you feel good, but it's not maybe based on

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<v Speaker 1>your pants size. Right. I also would just like to

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<v Speaker 1>take a second, because there are people who are probably

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<v Speaker 1>relating to this or that are like pushing it away.

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<v Speaker 1>And you're talking about when you were in that space

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<v Speaker 1>and you really really thought you you really did think

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<v Speaker 1>you were happy. There is a space in our disease

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<v Speaker 1>where we really do think that what we're doing is

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<v Speaker 1>working for us. And I think that we can get

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<v Speaker 1>really down on ourselves when we're outside of that space.

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<v Speaker 1>And I can't believe I did that, or I can't

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<v Speaker 1>believe I thought that, or I can't believe I sent

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<v Speaker 1>that message or told that thing to that person or

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<v Speaker 1>whatever it is. And I think it's worth mentioning and

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<v Speaker 1>worth taking a second to even just sit in with

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<v Speaker 1>yourself if you're feeling that like it's okay, totally you

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<v Speaker 1>didn't know and now you do, like you can't know

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<v Speaker 1>what you don't know, and that disease is really strong.

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<v Speaker 1>And so if you did something like that and you're

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<v Speaker 1>feeling guilt and shame over it, okay, but did you

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<v Speaker 1>know that that was bad and wrong in that time? No,

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<v Speaker 1>you didn't. I honestly didn't know any better than love

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<v Speaker 1>that way for so long that it felt normal. I

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<v Speaker 1>didn't surround myself with people that all acted that way

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<v Speaker 1>by any means, but because I had a platform to

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<v Speaker 1>put out a message that way, and I felt like

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<v Speaker 1>others were doing it in a sense like I felt,

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<v Speaker 1>and I followed people on Instagram that had behaviors like that,

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<v Speaker 1>so to me, it was very it was normal norm.

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<v Speaker 1>And now I have this recent example of being in

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<v Speaker 1>Vegas a couple of weeks ago where I got to

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<v Speaker 1>enjoy food and not work out and still show up

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<v Speaker 1>and do my job. And did you feel good on

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<v Speaker 1>when you were giving I felt great, Yes, I felt great.

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<v Speaker 1>Parts of me were happier, I know than I was

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<v Speaker 1>back then, because you know what, I would restrict for

0:10:12.160 --> 0:10:14.480
<v Speaker 1>those however, many days before the event, and then the

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<v Speaker 1>minute the event was over, I'd be like, let's go

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<v Speaker 1>get pancakes, and then I would completely over indulge because

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<v Speaker 1>my body was like feed me, feed me, and I thought, well,

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<v Speaker 1>it doesn't matter now I don't have an event, so

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<v Speaker 1>I'll just continue this fisious cycle of restrict binge, restrict binge.

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<v Speaker 1>And that's so hard for people to understand who are

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<v Speaker 1>in it. So I'm glad you're giving a real life

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<v Speaker 1>example and talking about it. But when I have conversations

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<v Speaker 1>with people about like, listen, I promise you're going to

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<v Speaker 1>enjoy your life more outside of this way of living,

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<v Speaker 1>in this belief system that you've created, it is possible

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<v Speaker 1>for you to enjoy your life and what you look

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<v Speaker 1>like in your pants size not to be the most

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<v Speaker 1>important thing. And people cannot get that through their brain

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<v Speaker 1>until they've experienced it, and they're like, wow, So now

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<v Speaker 1>you're having this moment and you're like, I've experienced it,

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<v Speaker 1>and me not juicing and being in my life and

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<v Speaker 1>accepting who I am, how I am, how I come

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<v Speaker 1>allowed me to enjoy my life better. I have now

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<v Speaker 1>have that experience, but I didn't know before. Yeah, well,

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<v Speaker 1>and we desperately want that shift for you, but it's

0:11:17.120 --> 0:11:20.760
<v Speaker 1>going to happen in your own time. And I would

0:11:20.800 --> 0:11:23.560
<v Speaker 1>hear certain things, but it wasn't registering with me. Like

0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:26.240
<v Speaker 1>I knew I needed to make a change, but it

0:11:26.320 --> 0:11:28.760
<v Speaker 1>took me a long time to get there. It was

0:11:28.880 --> 0:11:32.319
<v Speaker 1>a journey. So I don't want you to be discouraged

0:11:32.360 --> 0:11:35.240
<v Speaker 1>in any way if this is something that you too desire,

0:11:35.280 --> 0:11:38.559
<v Speaker 1>but it's not happening overnight because you literally have to

0:11:38.679 --> 0:11:42.720
<v Speaker 1>rewire your brain and that takes time, but the good

0:11:42.760 --> 0:11:46.320
<v Speaker 1>news is is that it's possible. And when we share

0:11:46.360 --> 0:11:48.959
<v Speaker 1>our stories or you hear about other people, than that

0:11:49.120 --> 0:11:52.200
<v Speaker 1>is the hope that you have and the encouragement to

0:11:52.200 --> 0:11:56.559
<v Speaker 1>to continue down that path of putting in the work,

0:11:56.640 --> 0:11:59.080
<v Speaker 1>to to know that that it can happen and that

0:11:59.160 --> 0:12:01.960
<v Speaker 1>we want that you And that's why we have that way,

0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:04.960
<v Speaker 1>and that's why I love our tagline, A Life without

0:12:04.960 --> 0:12:09.520
<v Speaker 1>Disordered Eating outweighs everything. It truly does. And I want

0:12:09.559 --> 0:12:13.160
<v Speaker 1>you to have that brain space back, and so does Lisa,

0:12:13.240 --> 0:12:16.000
<v Speaker 1>and so does Cat and any of our guests that

0:12:16.080 --> 0:12:18.440
<v Speaker 1>come on. Just know that you are not alone. And

0:12:18.480 --> 0:12:22.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm so thankful for our little community. And I will

0:12:22.160 --> 0:12:24.280
<v Speaker 1>add this last thing because I just think it's helpful

0:12:24.320 --> 0:12:26.679
<v Speaker 1>to hear and to be reminded of this. That we

0:12:26.800 --> 0:12:30.520
<v Speaker 1>see with our eyes how we're feeling inside of our bodies,

0:12:30.600 --> 0:12:33.160
<v Speaker 1>and we see through the messages that we are telling

0:12:33.160 --> 0:12:35.760
<v Speaker 1>ourselves inside of our bodies. So if we're sending that

0:12:35.840 --> 0:12:38.040
<v Speaker 1>message over and over and over and over again that

0:12:38.200 --> 0:12:40.600
<v Speaker 1>I will be happier. If I lose five pounds, I

0:12:40.600 --> 0:12:42.400
<v Speaker 1>will be happier. If I can fit into this, I

0:12:42.400 --> 0:12:44.719
<v Speaker 1>will be happier with this color hair. We're going to

0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:46.920
<v Speaker 1>see that, and we're gonna be dissatisfied when we look

0:12:46.920 --> 0:12:49.080
<v Speaker 1>at ourselves until we get that thing, and then we're

0:12:49.080 --> 0:12:51.440
<v Speaker 1>gonna want something else. But if we send a different

0:12:51.440 --> 0:12:53.599
<v Speaker 1>message about can be any message that you want, you

0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:56.000
<v Speaker 1>get to create it. I can be happy in this body,

0:12:56.040 --> 0:12:58.120
<v Speaker 1>I can love this body. I can show up fully

0:12:58.120 --> 0:13:01.040
<v Speaker 1>in this body. You're gonna see a body that you

0:13:01.080 --> 0:13:04.480
<v Speaker 1>believe is worthy of being seen and shown off the

0:13:04.520 --> 0:13:08.080
<v Speaker 1>way it is. And that is literal science. It's connecting

0:13:08.120 --> 0:13:10.920
<v Speaker 1>your body and your thoughts and your belief system altogether.

0:13:11.200 --> 0:13:13.480
<v Speaker 1>Thank you, Cat, and I hope people will check you

0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:16.480
<v Speaker 1>out on Instagram your account of such an encouragement to

0:13:16.559 --> 0:13:20.400
<v Speaker 1>me as I'm in my recovery. She's at cat dot

0:13:20.559 --> 0:13:24.000
<v Speaker 1>de fata d e f A T t A and

0:13:24.040 --> 0:13:28.560
<v Speaker 1>that's Cat with a K like a Kardashian um. So

0:13:29.000 --> 0:13:31.040
<v Speaker 1>cat dot de fata is where you can find her.

0:13:31.200 --> 0:13:35.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm radio Amy on all my socials, and then I

0:13:35.679 --> 0:13:37.719
<v Speaker 1>gave Lisa's Instagram out at the beginning. But if you

0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:40.160
<v Speaker 1>would love to email us, we want to hear from you.

0:13:40.360 --> 0:13:46.160
<v Speaker 1>Hello at Outweigh podcast dot com. See you next Saturday,