WEBVTT - Ron Takes The Vaccine 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:07.440 Wrong Burgundy Podcast. It's welcome back the Ron Burgundy Podcast. 0:00:07.520 --> 0:00:13.720 I'm Ron Burgundy with me as always is Carolina. Great 0:00:13.840 --> 0:00:17.160 to be back with you, Ron, Thank you, Thank you, Carolina. Yeah, 0:00:17.239 --> 0:00:19.800 I know it. It is great to be back with me. 0:00:20.280 --> 0:00:23.759 Not just for you personally, Carolina, but I think everyone 0:00:23.840 --> 0:00:27.639 feels it's great to be back with me. Being without 0:00:27.720 --> 0:00:30.960 me this long it had to be tough on everyone, 0:00:31.400 --> 0:00:35.320 especially right now. So I see we're starting this season 0:00:35.600 --> 0:00:40.720 at your standard level of narcissism. But it is always 0:00:40.800 --> 0:00:43.000 a pleasure, Ron, I don't even care. I'm just so 0:00:43.040 --> 0:00:44.960 happy to be back. I don't what did you say that? 0:00:45.000 --> 0:00:48.480 What's that word? I don't know what that word means? 0:00:48.720 --> 0:00:52.479 Always a pleasure. No, the word you just said, narc 0:00:53.040 --> 0:00:57.160 narc is, narcissis him? What what is that, Carolina? If 0:00:57.560 --> 0:01:00.639 if you're someone implying that I'm a narc I am 0:01:00.720 --> 0:01:04.559 not a narc um. No, no, no, it has nothing 0:01:04.600 --> 0:01:07.400 to do with being a narc. I said narcissism, and 0:01:07.560 --> 0:01:10.479 I would silent see never tip off the police if 0:01:10.480 --> 0:01:14.360 I knew about some creeps running an illegal chop shop, 0:01:14.640 --> 0:01:17.760 or inform the FBI about a group of interstate crystal 0:01:17.840 --> 0:01:21.679 meth dealers, never specific never. In fact, let's not discuss 0:01:21.760 --> 0:01:25.880 either of those things anymore in detail, because my friends 0:01:26.080 --> 0:01:30.520 are clean. No one is a whistle. No one's asking 0:01:30.520 --> 0:01:32.640 you to discuss your friends or whatever is going on 0:01:32.760 --> 0:01:36.840 with the interstate meth dealings of them. That's fine. The 0:01:37.000 --> 0:01:39.440 point is, I'm not an arc, if that's what you're 0:01:39.440 --> 0:01:42.000 implying with that fancy word you use. Know, No, I 0:01:42.040 --> 0:01:44.880 wasn't implying that you're. Of course you're not an arc, regardless. 0:01:45.120 --> 0:01:49.040 I'm insulted at the implication. Didn't imply that Ron Burgundy 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:52.200 is no snitch. You feel me? Do you feel me? 0:01:53.520 --> 0:01:56.320 I feel you. I'm not a narc, Carolina. I will 0:01:56.800 --> 0:01:59.600 cut you if I need to. Okay, straight up logo. 0:02:00.000 --> 0:02:02.440 Know you're not loco. You're not straight up loco. You're 0:02:02.440 --> 0:02:06.720 not going to cut me. The word narcissism has nothing 0:02:06.720 --> 0:02:09.400 to do with being a narc. Okay, all right, as 0:02:09.440 --> 0:02:17.360 long as we are clear, that's all I ask for. Clarity, right, yeah, transparency, clarity, good, Okay, 0:02:17.560 --> 0:02:19.799 not a narc. I'm just so you know too. I'm 0:02:19.840 --> 0:02:22.720 not even a tattle tale, which some could argue is 0:02:22.760 --> 0:02:25.840 even worse. I don't you're not a tattle I know, 0:02:26.040 --> 0:02:29.160 and I don't. I don't know how we got here already, 0:02:29.200 --> 0:02:31.800 but if we could get to our topic today, that 0:02:31.840 --> 0:02:35.920 would be amazing. Yes, you told me you had some 0:02:36.000 --> 0:02:39.639 interesting updates on where we're at with the vaccines. Obviously 0:02:39.680 --> 0:02:43.440 a lot of the country has been vaccinated, thankfully, So um, 0:02:43.480 --> 0:02:48.200 what's your angle? What have you learned? Well, um, go 0:02:48.280 --> 0:02:51.200 back to I'm not a tattle tale, but I loved 0:02:51.240 --> 0:02:56.840 the game show tattle Tales, so we can move to 0:02:56.880 --> 0:03:02.040 the topic though. Yes, um, yes, the topic of the vaccine. Okay, 0:03:02.080 --> 0:03:03.919 I would love to jump to this. I would love 0:03:03.960 --> 0:03:06.840 to get some real news and and stop being accused 0:03:06.880 --> 0:03:10.400 of sharing information about possible crimes I have witnessed in 0:03:10.520 --> 0:03:13.639 order to help myself in personal law enforcement situations. So 0:03:14.560 --> 0:03:16.639 let's just put it to bed once and for all. 0:03:17.040 --> 0:03:20.840 Ron Burgundy is neither a narc nor a tattle tale 0:03:21.040 --> 0:03:23.680 if you're helping yourself in perfect though, once again, I 0:03:23.720 --> 0:03:27.240 love the game show Tattle Tales. You've made that quite clear. 0:03:28.000 --> 0:03:32.000 If you're helping someone for your personal gain, it actually 0:03:32.040 --> 0:03:34.920 does sound exactly what a narc is. But you know what, 0:03:35.880 --> 0:03:39.760 We're gonna let that run by. And if you could 0:03:39.760 --> 0:03:44.880 share with us your experience about the pandemic or the vaccine. 0:03:44.920 --> 0:03:47.720 I think that would be helpful and interesting to our 0:03:47.760 --> 0:03:50.320 listeners to hear what Ron Burgundy has to say. Couldn't 0:03:50.360 --> 0:03:54.160 agree more, Carolina, folks. I think right now people are 0:03:54.200 --> 0:03:58.760 looking for straight facts, real information. Things are changing by 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:01.440 the day, and one thing I'm very proud of is 0:04:01.480 --> 0:04:03.840 that I am. I am a trusted source for so 0:04:03.840 --> 0:04:06.720 many people out there, not as a journalist, but as 0:04:06.760 --> 0:04:11.000 a human being. People think of me as a comforting, compassionate, 0:04:11.560 --> 0:04:14.960 welcoming presence in their homes. Even in bad times. I 0:04:15.000 --> 0:04:18.320 make people feel better. I bring a sense of calm 0:04:18.480 --> 0:04:22.480 during these difficult times. I'm like a golden Retriever puppy 0:04:22.480 --> 0:04:25.800 wrapped in a bow, or like a little snow man, 0:04:26.440 --> 0:04:28.839 or like a nice shot of rum right when the 0:04:28.920 --> 0:04:33.160 kids go to sleep and you're off the wagon again. Anyway, 0:04:33.160 --> 0:04:36.080 to our listeners, I know Ron and I sometimes have 0:04:36.160 --> 0:04:39.640 our differences on the air. That's only when you're being 0:04:39.680 --> 0:04:42.920 an idiot, which I say with all due respect, and 0:04:43.200 --> 0:04:46.320 otherwise we get along swimmingly. It doesn't feel with all 0:04:47.040 --> 0:04:49.080 with all due respect. You can't just say with all 0:04:49.120 --> 0:04:51.560 due respects, and I feel respected, but I mean it 0:04:51.680 --> 0:04:56.640 is with all due respect. Well, Listen was a really 0:04:56.680 --> 0:04:59.720 tough year on all of us, and I'm sure our 0:04:59.760 --> 0:05:02.000 odd is always glad to hear your voice again in 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:04.679 this new season. That I don't think you're wrong about 0:05:04.839 --> 0:05:09.120 that is that's a real unpartisan view right there. People 0:05:09.120 --> 0:05:11.440 are people are very happy to hear me right now. 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:13.920 I don't know whether it's the timber of my voice, 0:05:14.440 --> 0:05:19.080 my measured tone, or my musky personal scent, but I've 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:22.599 never felt more loved and appreciated as a broadcaster than 0:05:22.720 --> 0:05:25.719 right now. I guess that's important. In fact, some people 0:05:25.720 --> 0:05:28.760 have told me they've been listening to this podcast, heard 0:05:28.839 --> 0:05:31.720 my voice, and all of a sudden, they feel like 0:05:31.760 --> 0:05:35.080 they can actually smell me in the room. My voice 0:05:35.160 --> 0:05:37.600 must send out some kind of fair mind. I need 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:41.360 to interrupt. That was from a very strange fan letter 0:05:41.400 --> 0:05:44.000 we received about a fan being it will smell you 0:05:44.040 --> 0:05:45.800 in the room, and you know what, we actually we 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:50.320 forwarded that to the proper authorities. Why did you do that? 0:05:50.680 --> 0:05:53.679 I was really creepy, but I was touched by their correspondence. 0:05:53.720 --> 0:05:58.040 I I sent them an expensive gift basket of candied almonds. 0:05:58.160 --> 0:06:01.840 Let's get back to talking about the pandemic. Yes, the 0:06:01.920 --> 0:06:07.000 PAM demmic, the changing political landscape. No, Pan, did you're 0:06:07.040 --> 0:06:11.640 saying PAM PAM pandemic, not the PAN Yes, yes, the 0:06:11.680 --> 0:06:15.599 PAM DEMI. Carolina, surely you're aware of the PAM demic. 0:06:16.320 --> 0:06:19.920 So many people throughout the world are fighting this PAM DEMI. 0:06:20.760 --> 0:06:26.200 I've read some recent Pan Pan. Not PAM PAM demic, pandemic. 0:06:26.480 --> 0:06:30.640 I'm not talking about the COVID pandemic yet. I was 0:06:30.680 --> 0:06:34.880 speaking on the PAM demic. Wait, did you think I 0:06:34.920 --> 0:06:38.200 was talking about the coronavirus. Well, yes, that's what we 0:06:38.200 --> 0:06:43.360 were talking about. The COVID pandemic. COVID nineteen is a pandemic, 0:06:43.800 --> 0:06:46.280 and I have some optimistic news to share about the 0:06:46.760 --> 0:06:50.800 pandemic later on on the show. First, though, on today's show, 0:06:51.160 --> 0:06:56.160 I wanted to talk about the dangerous PAM demmic. I'm 0:06:56.200 --> 0:06:59.160 I think everyone is confused right now. So do you 0:06:59.240 --> 0:07:04.360 have updates on your experience with COVID and the vaccine 0:07:04.440 --> 0:07:09.600 or not? I do major updates, huge scientific advances. In fact, 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:13.200 I have the vaccine ron that's great. I actually I 0:07:13.280 --> 0:07:15.720 was worried that you weren't going to take the vaccine 0:07:15.920 --> 0:07:19.240 I mean, there's some anti boxers out there, and guess 0:07:19.240 --> 0:07:22.560 what I will be taking it live on today's episode 0:07:22.960 --> 0:07:26.560 of the podcast. That is actually great, But let's not 0:07:26.600 --> 0:07:29.400 waste any more time about Pam or Pan. This is 0:07:29.440 --> 0:07:32.600 going to set a great example for people who may 0:07:33.160 --> 0:07:36.360 still be a little nervous to take it. Great. No, 0:07:36.600 --> 0:07:39.640 I agree, let's let's get right to it. But first, 0:07:39.720 --> 0:07:43.360 some info on the Pam demons I was speaking about, 0:07:43.440 --> 0:07:47.640 because you're apparently not even aware it's going on. Honestly, 0:07:47.640 --> 0:07:53.040 not a surprise because with all due respect and mentally, 0:07:53.120 --> 0:07:57.920 as I say that, I'm underlining the word due before respect. 0:07:58.560 --> 0:08:02.120 You are a terrible journalists. You can't underline something in 0:08:02.160 --> 0:08:05.480 your head and then acts, so I think it serves 0:08:05.480 --> 0:08:08.000 the same purpose if you announce that, just so you 0:08:08.040 --> 0:08:11.840 know before I say this, it's underlined in my head. Okay, 0:08:11.840 --> 0:08:15.920 well I'm italicizing in my head. That works. That works fine, 0:08:16.240 --> 0:08:21.840 that works for me. No, thank you. It's not capitalized 0:08:21.960 --> 0:08:25.080 with all due respect when you call me a terrible journalist, 0:08:25.160 --> 0:08:31.520 so all of that is italicized phrase and it's not 0:08:32.120 --> 0:08:37.120 is italicized. To listen, I think I'm so lost right now. 0:08:38.280 --> 0:08:40.800 It doesn't matter run. I think I speak for everyone 0:08:40.840 --> 0:08:43.400 when I say we don't know what a Pam p 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:47.000 Am demicist. Yes, p Am, thank you, I am capitalized. 0:08:47.080 --> 0:08:50.120 Nobody knows what that means. See, this is what I 0:08:50.160 --> 0:08:53.040 meant when I said we struggle professionally. No, no no, I 0:08:53.080 --> 0:08:56.080 know we struggle professionally. I feel it every moment of 0:08:56.120 --> 0:09:04.560 every hour of every day, atalicized underlying Okay, yes, well, okay, 0:09:04.679 --> 0:09:07.400 quickly tell me what the Pam demmick is and then 0:09:07.400 --> 0:09:11.000 we'll move on to encouraging people to get vaccinated who 0:09:11.000 --> 0:09:14.440 are scared. I don't know if it's your generation. I 0:09:14.440 --> 0:09:17.360 I don't know if it's that TikTok app distracting you. 0:09:17.520 --> 0:09:21.160 But wow, I just I find it very hard to 0:09:21.200 --> 0:09:25.800 believe you don't know about the awful Pam demmic going 0:09:25.840 --> 0:09:29.040 on at the same time as COVID nineteen, which, by 0:09:29.080 --> 0:09:31.920 the way, I've got vials of the vaccine sitting here. 0:09:32.320 --> 0:09:34.960 But we'll get to that now. The Pam dimmick, on 0:09:34.960 --> 0:09:37.640 the other hand, that's the news. That's the real. Okay, 0:09:37.640 --> 0:09:40.520 how about this as an option, we talk about the 0:09:40.559 --> 0:09:44.480 COVID nineteen vaccine first. A lot of people, you know, 0:09:44.520 --> 0:09:47.560 it's it's amazing scientific breakthrough that we even got this, 0:09:47.840 --> 0:09:51.680 and I think we just want to encourage it again. 0:09:51.880 --> 0:09:54.440 And then and then after we finish, you can talk 0:09:54.480 --> 0:09:58.319 about your PAM VERSU PAN whatever you want. Here's the 0:09:58.360 --> 0:10:02.680 second option. We go to commercial break. Okay, make some coin, 0:10:03.760 --> 0:10:07.800 a little little cashi or cheddar as they say, and 0:10:07.840 --> 0:10:10.920 then come back and talk about both the pandemic and 0:10:11.000 --> 0:10:13.240 the pan dimics. So the opposite of what I'm saying. 0:10:13.440 --> 0:10:16.360 That sound good. I am the host of the show. 0:10:17.160 --> 0:10:20.360 You feel me, I feel you, I feel you. You 0:10:20.400 --> 0:10:22.600 feel me that I don't know the whole I feel 0:10:22.640 --> 0:10:26.120 you think? Did you just learn that? I learned it yesterday? Okay? 0:10:26.520 --> 0:10:28.760 Promise me, by the way, when I say you feel me, 0:10:29.480 --> 0:10:34.560 I mentally underlined feel, so you feel me. And when 0:10:34.559 --> 0:10:37.559 I say stop asking me that I did an explanation point. 0:10:37.920 --> 0:10:41.280 All right, good, Okay, Well, let's just promise people should 0:10:41.280 --> 0:10:44.360 talk more like this with each other. It's a little confusing, 0:10:44.440 --> 0:10:46.559 but I guess we're just trying, as you said to 0:10:47.480 --> 0:10:52.440 you operate with clarity. Your favorite things supposedly listen, just 0:10:52.480 --> 0:10:54.720 promised me when we get back, you're going to get 0:10:54.800 --> 0:10:57.680 right to the vaccine, because I think people really want 0:10:57.720 --> 0:11:00.000 as much information as they can right now, people who 0:11:00.000 --> 0:11:05.400 were nervous. Yes, absolutely absolutely. When we come back, we 0:11:05.440 --> 0:11:19.880 will discuss the pam dem No welcome back. If you're 0:11:19.920 --> 0:11:22.320 just tuning in, it's the podcast, not a radio show. 0:11:22.840 --> 0:11:26.840 No one's I've finally gotten that concept. Really, it seems 0:11:26.880 --> 0:11:30.040 like we always up against this. I'm just maybe maybe 0:11:30.040 --> 0:11:32.200 they decided to fast forward and start in the middle 0:11:32.200 --> 0:11:35.480 of the podcast. That's what I'm maybe maybe. Okay, it's 0:11:35.480 --> 0:11:38.240 within the realm of possibility. So you were saying you 0:11:38.360 --> 0:11:42.720 actually have the COVID vaccine and you're preparing to take 0:11:42.760 --> 0:11:46.160 it live right here on the podcast. How safe it is? Now? 0:11:46.240 --> 0:11:51.800 Is it maderna Fiser, the Johnson and Johnson. Well, Um, 0:11:51.840 --> 0:11:54.120 it's actually the v I P One. Not a lot 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:58.480 of people have heard of this brand. It's I haven't. 0:11:59.200 --> 0:12:02.520 It's made in a secret laboratory in the Marshall Islands, 0:12:03.360 --> 0:12:07.640 which is a US protectorate. Um. And uh, it's a 0:12:07.800 --> 0:12:11.679 very v I P service. Um, and it comes with 0:12:11.800 --> 0:12:14.160 also v I P bottle service. I have a choice 0:12:14.160 --> 0:12:17.240 of a bottle of champagne vodka. You have to pay extra, 0:12:17.360 --> 0:12:19.760 but it's worth it. But what I'm trying to say 0:12:19.800 --> 0:12:22.400 is I realize I am very fortunate to have this 0:12:22.600 --> 0:12:25.360 V I P vaccine and not everyone has access to it, 0:12:25.800 --> 0:12:28.880 which is really a shame. It's not fair. But I 0:12:29.400 --> 0:12:31.440 have it because I'm a celebrity, and I'm I'm going 0:12:31.480 --> 0:12:34.480 to take it live right here, showing how safe and 0:12:34.559 --> 0:12:39.080 effective it is, how safe and effective the secret vaccine 0:12:39.080 --> 0:12:42.839 from the martialized secret vaccine, which is a hybrid of 0:12:42.880 --> 0:12:45.840 all the other vaccines, so therefore it is symbolic of 0:12:45.880 --> 0:12:50.840 how safe the vaccination processes as a whole. I'm not 0:12:50.920 --> 0:12:53.960 loving this build up, but let's just get to um 0:12:53.960 --> 0:12:57.240 you taking in we can before we discuss the pandemic. 0:12:57.360 --> 0:13:01.920 Let's discuss the pam demmic, folks. I don't know how 0:13:01.960 --> 0:13:04.080 to report this in a way that doesn't sound a 0:13:04.080 --> 0:13:08.040 little strange, but I assure you everything I'm about to 0:13:08.080 --> 0:13:13.320 tell you is very real, underlined very mentally, and you 0:13:13.960 --> 0:13:18.080 deserve the truth. There are women named Pam all over 0:13:18.080 --> 0:13:21.480 the world who are disappearing, just vanishing into thin air. 0:13:22.080 --> 0:13:26.360 It's a scientific mystery. We are experiencing a true pam medemic. 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:29.600 I'm going to treat this like it's normal and just 0:13:29.760 --> 0:13:32.679 say that I don't have any reports of missing PAMs. Well, 0:13:32.720 --> 0:13:34.880 that doesn't surprise me at all. I mean, you're probably 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:39.160 too busy binging reruns of Friends or Sanford and Son 0:13:39.400 --> 0:13:42.760 in your pajamas to open up a damn newspaper. I'm 0:13:42.760 --> 0:13:46.480 not binging episodes of Sandford and Son. I don't believe me. 0:13:46.600 --> 0:13:49.600 I have been staying informed every day. I watched the 0:13:49.600 --> 0:13:53.080 news every morning, and and it's overwhelming. I'm I'm filled 0:13:53.080 --> 0:13:57.480 with anxiety, but not anxiety over missing palms or pamelas. 0:13:57.480 --> 0:14:01.160 There's no reports of women named Pam going missing. Wait, 0:14:01.280 --> 0:14:04.360 but you've seen Sanford and Sun, right, because that's a 0:14:04.520 --> 0:14:07.880 very good show. Yes, I've seen Sandford and Son. Do 0:14:07.960 --> 0:14:09.960 you do you want to sing the theme to Sanford 0:14:09.960 --> 0:14:13.040 and Sun with me? Right now? You know what I 0:14:13.200 --> 0:14:26.400 really just like to But okay, stop d please keep 0:14:26.480 --> 0:14:32.800 let's keep it going by not until you sing the 0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:35.640 theme to Sanford and Sun with me. Come on, come on, 0:14:35.720 --> 0:14:38.160 people are going through hard times. Bring them a little joy. 0:14:47.520 --> 0:14:50.880 My name is Sanford, and I have a son and 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:56.160 we run a junkyard. Okay, don't make a lot of dope, 0:14:56.200 --> 0:14:59.240 but we have a lot of love. Yours were the 0:14:59.360 --> 0:15:03.720 lyrics they left out I'm played by Red Fox. I'm 0:15:03.760 --> 0:15:07.440 a very fouled mouth comedian, but I cleaned it up 0:15:07.600 --> 0:15:13.120 for the boob tube. Okay, let's you're sitting here with 0:15:13.320 --> 0:15:18.000 the V I P. Question mark. Yes, not a question mark. 0:15:18.520 --> 0:15:21.760 It's news to our listeners that there is a secret, 0:15:22.040 --> 0:15:25.400 not f v I P. Yes, FDA didn't have to 0:15:25.400 --> 0:15:28.360 look at it, went straight to the marketplace. I see 0:15:28.400 --> 0:15:32.160 if you could afford it. I see the syringe. Look 0:15:32.200 --> 0:15:38.320 at their flecks of gold bullion. Is that it's beautiful? 0:15:39.240 --> 0:15:43.080 I hope it's not the Loquere gold Schlager. And what's 0:15:43.120 --> 0:15:46.240 the other syringe next to you? That's a that's botox. 0:15:46.880 --> 0:15:49.200 Well it's a filler, all right, So I didn't know 0:15:49.480 --> 0:15:52.720 you do botox. No, it's for you for that saggy 0:15:52.800 --> 0:15:56.400 jarline of yours. Happy birthday. I don't have. I mean, 0:15:56.440 --> 0:15:58.800 I'm not vain, but I don't have. I have. Actually, 0:15:59.240 --> 0:16:01.640 this syren and Jo over here in this drawer is 0:16:01.680 --> 0:16:03.680 the vaccine and I will be taking it live on 0:16:03.760 --> 0:16:06.600 the air in just a few moments. I should note 0:16:06.640 --> 0:16:09.440 this is a special celebrity edition of the vaccine. We 0:16:09.480 --> 0:16:11.320 get it, which can't take it? And you have to 0:16:11.360 --> 0:16:14.280 be a celebrity to get it. Yeah, okay, I'm just 0:16:14.400 --> 0:16:16.760 I'm a little worried about you taking something that's not 0:16:16.840 --> 0:16:20.560 FT approved, And I just want to really highlight underlying 0:16:20.680 --> 0:16:25.320 italicized for our listeners that Maderna, Fiser, Johnson, and Johnson. 0:16:25.400 --> 0:16:28.880 These have all been approved to take. Um, you won't 0:16:28.880 --> 0:16:33.400 get serious side effects. But this um, this, uh, this 0:16:33.840 --> 0:16:38.480 untitled v I P. You know, Marshall Islands. I'm so sorry. 0:16:38.480 --> 0:16:41.680 I don't understand that you have to be a celebrity. Well, 0:16:41.760 --> 0:16:43.880 it's just it's not enough to be rich. They only 0:16:43.880 --> 0:16:48.120 give this vaccine out to celebrities, a couple of YouTubers 0:16:48.120 --> 0:16:52.520 like Addison Ray, the guy who's sang chocolate rain. We 0:16:52.560 --> 0:16:55.360 are very lucky to be celebrities and have early access 0:16:55.400 --> 0:16:58.080 to this vaccine. And do you have any idea when 0:16:58.120 --> 0:17:00.760 it will be f D approved or when the rest 0:17:00.800 --> 0:17:04.359 of the world will be getting the option of taking 0:17:04.440 --> 0:17:07.800 the v I P vaccine. You told me it's actually 0:17:07.840 --> 0:17:15.040 one effect, one efficacy. It doesn't sound actually possible. They 0:17:15.080 --> 0:17:18.480 think it might be effective, and the FDA doesn't know 0:17:18.520 --> 0:17:21.199 about it. They do not, And let's let's keep it 0:17:21.240 --> 0:17:24.359 like that for a second. As for when non celebrities 0:17:24.359 --> 0:17:28.600 will get access to the vaccine. I forgot to ask. Yeah, 0:17:28.640 --> 0:17:32.760 that was on me. Oops. Anyway, before I take this vaccine, 0:17:33.280 --> 0:17:36.560 let's get back to the mysterious disappearance of women named 0:17:36.600 --> 0:17:40.879 Pam happening all over the world. Fine, I give up, 0:17:40.920 --> 0:17:42.960 tell us about the Pam deemic. I want to know now, 0:17:43.040 --> 0:17:47.400 what what p am demic? What is that? It's very serious, Carolina, 0:17:47.480 --> 0:17:51.320 and it's a good thing you're not named Pam, even 0:17:51.359 --> 0:17:55.000 though I've always thought Carolina was a horrible name. You're 0:17:55.040 --> 0:17:58.960 You're lucky you're not named Pam. Um that I was 0:17:59.040 --> 0:18:02.600 named after my grandmother and she was a wartime nurse 0:18:02.640 --> 0:18:07.120 actually well as sexy. As that said, let's stay focused 0:18:07.160 --> 0:18:11.000 on the Pam demmic. He might have just this is 0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:14.560 just a hypothesis I have. But did you happen to 0:18:14.600 --> 0:18:17.919 mispronounce the word pandemic at the top of the show, 0:18:18.680 --> 0:18:21.040 and now you're just trying to cover with some made 0:18:21.080 --> 0:18:24.480 up store you've invented about women named Pam disappearing? And 0:18:24.520 --> 0:18:27.280 if that's the case, you know, let's move on. It's okay. 0:18:27.320 --> 0:18:29.720 You made a mistake and you don't need to have 0:18:30.359 --> 0:18:35.439 this insane cover story. Absolutely not Carolina, absolutely not. I 0:18:35.480 --> 0:18:38.440 assure you that the case, the Pam demic, is real 0:18:39.080 --> 0:18:42.520 and it's touched my life personally. I admit I didn't 0:18:42.560 --> 0:18:45.840 take it seriously enough at first. It started with my 0:18:45.960 --> 0:18:49.359 neighbor Pam. Her mail started to pile up outside of 0:18:49.359 --> 0:18:53.200 her house and other neighbors were concerned she She hadn't 0:18:53.240 --> 0:18:56.200 been seen for a while, and Pam was usually out 0:18:56.200 --> 0:18:58.520 in her dumb garden every day with a portable radio, 0:18:58.600 --> 0:19:03.520 listen to music out. I mean, I like Katrina and 0:19:03.560 --> 0:19:07.120 the Waves, but every day out in the garden blasting 0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:11.200 that walking on Sunshine song at seven thirty am. I mean, 0:19:11.200 --> 0:19:14.000 I guess it was her routine. I mean, the details 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:17.280 make this sound legitimate, but I still feel like this 0:19:17.359 --> 0:19:20.119 might be made up. I'm sorry, Well, this is a 0:19:20.240 --> 0:19:23.680 very complex story and I want to cover all the details. Caroline. 0:19:23.680 --> 0:19:29.040 It's called journalism. Please look it up. Fine, I'm sorry, No, no, no, no, 0:19:29.080 --> 0:19:30.679 that's not good enough. To take out your phone right 0:19:30.680 --> 0:19:34.439 now and look up the word journalism. I'll wait. I 0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:38.600 think I think you'll learn quite a bit. Fine, take 0:19:38.640 --> 0:19:42.880 it out. Fine, go ahead, we can take as long 0:19:42.920 --> 0:19:47.960 as it takes. I heard has said I have unlimited time. 0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:51.240 I could do a ten hour podcast if I wanted 0:19:51.240 --> 0:19:56.919 to go ahead, look it up. Journalism the activity or 0:19:57.040 --> 0:20:02.520 profession of writing for newspapers, magazines, or news websites, or 0:20:02.600 --> 0:20:05.880 preparing news to be broadcast. I don't think I needed that, 0:20:05.960 --> 0:20:09.600 I could, Yeah, thank you. Now let a real journalists 0:20:09.800 --> 0:20:13.600 do their job. So with this whole Pam demic thing, 0:20:13.680 --> 0:20:16.680 I initially looked the other way when Pam disappeared because, 0:20:16.720 --> 0:20:20.679 like I said, she was annoying the music, more annoying 0:20:20.720 --> 0:20:25.080 than you, Carolina. I know, I'm I'm being serious. In fact, 0:20:25.480 --> 0:20:28.720 she was a real Hold on, let let me find 0:20:28.760 --> 0:20:31.680 the politically correct term for this. Yeah, we can stand 0:20:31.680 --> 0:20:34.159 by while you do take your time with that. Is 0:20:34.160 --> 0:20:36.920 it is it cool to call a woman a harpy? 0:20:37.200 --> 0:20:40.639 Is that a no go harpy? For the sake of 0:20:40.680 --> 0:20:44.840 moving this along, call a woman a harpy at wonderful? 0:20:44.880 --> 0:20:48.760 So this harpy c word disappears, okay, and I don't 0:20:48.760 --> 0:20:51.879 think much of it. Maybe she moved and opened a 0:20:51.920 --> 0:20:54.840 candy store in Portland, and maybe maybe she was killed 0:20:54.880 --> 0:20:59.040 by the yakuza. Not my problem. I'm just happy to 0:20:59.040 --> 0:21:02.520 have a little break from that damn walking on sunshine song, which, again, 0:21:02.720 --> 0:21:07.440 great song, but small doses. You know. However, other Pam's 0:21:08.040 --> 0:21:14.120 start to disappear, famous PAMs, Pam Dauber, Pam Greer, They 0:21:14.119 --> 0:21:17.080 were vanishing into thin air. I was following the story 0:21:17.400 --> 0:21:20.840 when I found out Pam Anderson had vaporized. That's what 0:21:21.000 --> 0:21:26.480 I said, enough is enough. So you're claiming that random 0:21:26.520 --> 0:21:31.200 women named Pam or vaporizing into thin air, Carolina scientists 0:21:31.280 --> 0:21:33.760 are baffled, and that's why it's called a Pam demmic. 0:21:34.080 --> 0:21:36.800 I mean, when you get an opportunity for wordplay, no 0:21:36.840 --> 0:21:39.719 matter how dire the circumstances, you you have to take it. 0:21:40.240 --> 0:21:45.639 All right, I'm gonna be direct. You were the one 0:21:45.640 --> 0:21:47.879 who said you liked clarity. You were the one that 0:21:47.920 --> 0:21:54.399 said you like transparency. Right. Opaque is my enemy, and 0:21:54.440 --> 0:21:56.840 not because that's the name of the stripper who stole 0:21:56.880 --> 0:22:01.199 my wallet, Opaque. That's okay, she was beauty full. So 0:22:01.320 --> 0:22:05.480 I'm going to ask you a question for the second time. Italicized, 0:22:06.760 --> 0:22:10.520 did you accidentally mispronounced the word pandemic at the start 0:22:10.560 --> 0:22:15.080 of the show and then create this elaborate and frankly 0:22:15.160 --> 0:22:19.800 unbelievable lie so that you wouldn't sound stupid that's just 0:22:20.160 --> 0:22:24.760 I'm I'm being treparent. No, I did not. That's a 0:22:24.760 --> 0:22:27.320 total falsehood. And this has nothing to do with the 0:22:27.320 --> 0:22:30.360 fact that you have the v I P quote unquote 0:22:30.640 --> 0:22:33.520 coronavirus vaccine right in front of you. Yes, I'm looking 0:22:33.560 --> 0:22:35.640 at it right now, which I can see you have. 0:22:36.000 --> 0:22:42.359 And I know that you don't love shots, um, and 0:22:42.400 --> 0:22:45.560 I know that sometimes you put them off. You got 0:22:45.560 --> 0:22:50.040 the polio vaccine last year, and um, I just want 0:22:50.040 --> 0:22:51.439 to know if you're trying to put it off with 0:22:51.520 --> 0:22:57.520 this long diagnosis for a pandemic, right, I really, I 0:22:57.600 --> 0:23:00.679 really don't like shot scare Lada. They hurt. Yeah, I 0:23:00.680 --> 0:23:04.960 mean it's a needle going into your arm. It gives 0:23:05.000 --> 0:23:08.680 me a big auchie. You're a grown man. Run. You 0:23:08.720 --> 0:23:12.040 don't need to say OUCHI, but I don't like ouchies. 0:23:12.160 --> 0:23:14.600 There's no such thing as a pandemic, is there. Run. 0:23:14.760 --> 0:23:17.879 Be clear you're afraid to take the vaccine. I'm not 0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:21.720 afraid of the vaccine. This is a great, special, celebrity 0:23:21.760 --> 0:23:25.399 only vaccine. They've only made a hundred of these, and 0:23:25.440 --> 0:23:28.640 they gave them to big stars, big stars like me 0:23:29.440 --> 0:23:33.280 Iced Tea and Kelly Giddish. In fact, the whole cast 0:23:33.359 --> 0:23:36.320 of Law and Order Special Victims Unit got this vaccine. 0:23:37.040 --> 0:23:40.400 I think it's amazing that so many famous people were 0:23:40.440 --> 0:23:46.359 willing to forego Maderna, Fiser, Johnson, Johnson again FT approved 0:23:46.480 --> 0:23:50.840 vaccines and go for this mysterious one from the Marshall Islands. Well, 0:23:51.080 --> 0:23:54.120 I have no fears about the vaccine safety. Do you 0:23:54.280 --> 0:23:56.840 think Big Pharma is going to take a chance on 0:23:56.960 --> 0:24:01.200 Mauritshka Hargat's life. I doubt it. I guess not. S 0:24:01.280 --> 0:24:05.560 VU is too important of a television franchise. I was 0:24:05.680 --> 0:24:08.239 lucky to get this vaccine, and to get it, I 0:24:08.240 --> 0:24:12.200 had to post a major strings shout out to Addison Ray. Okay, 0:24:12.240 --> 0:24:13.879 you need to knock it off. This is a chance 0:24:13.920 --> 0:24:15.919 for you to really step up as a journalist and 0:24:15.960 --> 0:24:18.000 it will show people there's hope on the way. It 0:24:18.040 --> 0:24:21.080 will protect you against getting the virus. All you need 0:24:21.119 --> 0:24:23.320 to do is give yourself a little shot. And I'm 0:24:23.359 --> 0:24:25.960 just saying, maybe it shouldn't be this one. Maybe let's 0:24:26.000 --> 0:24:29.000 go to CVS and get you Maderna. I'm so scared 0:24:29.040 --> 0:24:32.240 of needles Carolina, and I'm sorry I'm not as tough 0:24:32.280 --> 0:24:35.959 as iced Tea. Here's what we're gonna do Okay, we're 0:24:35.960 --> 0:24:38.520 gonna take a little break. You are going to take 0:24:38.520 --> 0:24:40.880 a deep breath, and when we come back, I think 0:24:40.920 --> 0:24:44.840 you have a journalistic responsibility to say, no, I'm not 0:24:44.880 --> 0:24:47.760 going to take this v I P vaccine. I'm gonna 0:24:47.760 --> 0:24:51.639 go make a legitimate appointment with the doctor. And you 0:24:51.680 --> 0:24:54.480 know this vaccine isn't real and that's why no one's 0:24:54.520 --> 0:24:57.719 heard about it. Again, I cannot stress this vaccine is 0:24:57.760 --> 0:25:01.200