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Speaker 1: My mother held my inheritance hostage just because of the Internet.

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Speaker 2: Well that's crazy, Sophia.

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Speaker 1: Well Riley, it's Inheriting Too Much Drama Week on the

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime podcast, where we're uncovering the most unhinged stories

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Speaker 1: of greed, betrayal, and family secrets fails that will have

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Speaker 1: you questioning whether the people closest to you actually have

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Speaker 1: your best interests at heart, or if they've just been

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Speaker 1: waiting for the right moment to show their true colors,

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Speaker 1: because apparently, for some families.

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Speaker 3: Love is a price tag.

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Speaker 1: If you're new year and looking for the story I

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Speaker 1: became a millionaire overnight and lost everything.

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Speaker 3: That actually mattered.

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Speaker 1: Just click the link in the show notes and description,

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Speaker 1: or search Inheriting too Much Drama Week, Okay Storytime wherever

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Speaker 1: you get your podcasts. Let's dive into this one, but

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Speaker 1: first a quick two minute break for the sponsors keeping.

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Speaker 3: This show afloat.

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Speaker 1: My mother bought an Android TV box that can stream

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Speaker 1: any news.

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Speaker 3: Show or movie for free, which I told her was technically.

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Speaker 1: Illegal, but her response was streaming isn't illegal because we

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Speaker 1: aren't downloading the content. I said, all right and left it.

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Speaker 1: It turns out our Internet service provider isn't too keen

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Speaker 1: on this and throttles our whole network to unbearable speeds.

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Speaker 1: When the box is in use, however, the box will

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Speaker 1: hog all the throttle bandwidth, so the movie will still stream,

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Speaker 1: but every other device will be kicked off the network.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from fat Dogs. And if

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Speaker 1: you want to spit your own stories, go to the

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Speaker 1: r slash Okay storytime suburn it.

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Speaker 3: I'm Sophia, I'm Riley, and we're here to give good

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Speaker 3: advice goofully, but we don't have all the answers.

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Speaker 1: We only know what we'd do, so let us note

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Speaker 1: you would do in the comments and op says. When

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Speaker 1: I told my mother about this, or ask them to

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Speaker 1: just pause for a bit so I could get any

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Speaker 1: work done, her response was always I pay for the

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Speaker 1: internet and it seems to be working, so you can

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Speaker 1: deal with not having internet while I'm watching TV. I've

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Speaker 1: been dealing with this for two weeks now. I was

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Speaker 1: disqualified from two job interview technical tests, had to plead

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Speaker 1: to retake a midterm with my professor, and often get

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Speaker 1: booted when I'm on a call with my girlfriend who

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Speaker 1: is long distance going to school and we only get two.

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Speaker 3: Or three hours to talk a day.

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Speaker 1: When they left for a bit today, I did some

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Speaker 1: troubleshooting and found that a VPN fixes this problem. So

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Speaker 1: when they came back, I told her that a VPN

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Speaker 1: fixes the problem and that they should use one anyway,

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Speaker 1: since their activities are illicit and it also keeps their

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Speaker 1: information safe. Her response, unsurprisingly, was I bought the box

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Speaker 1: to stop paying for subscriptions. I'm not gonna pay for

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Speaker 1: something when the TV works test.

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Speaker 3: Fine, you can live with that Internet. I thought she'd at.

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Speaker 1: Least be reasonable, and I was going to offer to

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Speaker 1: pay for half the yearly subscription to Express VPN one

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Speaker 1: hundred dollars a year, but instead I was just shocked

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Speaker 1: and left. Shortly after, she came to me and told

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Speaker 1: me that I should just pay for the VPN because

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Speaker 1: I'm the one who would be using it anyway. I

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Speaker 1: told her that's not how it works. I wouldn't be

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Speaker 1: using it, but I'd split the cost with her. She

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Speaker 1: didn't like that answer because she then started to go offsan,

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Speaker 1: you're a twent eight ou and you'dn't pay for anything.

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Speaker 1: YO should start at least paying for rent and to

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Speaker 1: use our Internet.

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Speaker 4: Now.

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Speaker 1: I know that statement doesn't sound too who bad read it,

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Speaker 1: and I agree, taken out of context, it's probably fine.

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Speaker 3: But here's some background.

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Speaker 1: My parents told me that I could live rent free

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Speaker 1: till I graduate college, which led me to go to

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Speaker 1: the local university to save money and not have to

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Speaker 1: pay for room and board. My tuition, on the other hand,

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Speaker 1: is just barely covered through a small sum of money

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Speaker 1: my grandfather left me when he passed, but the account

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Speaker 1: holder's name is my mother's. If that doesn't cover my tuition,

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Speaker 1: I would pay it myself out of pocket. My brother,

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Speaker 1: on the other hand, moved out to go to college,

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Speaker 1: and his financials are a different story. My mother fully

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Speaker 1: pays for his tuition, room and board, and groceries so

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Speaker 1: he doesn't have to work while he goes to school.

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Speaker 1: The tuition and room and board together for him are

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Speaker 1: almost three times what tuition alone costs for me, and

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Speaker 1: yet she pays that without batting an eye anyways. To

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Speaker 1: continue the story, my mother continued going off, telling me

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Speaker 1: that's starting now, I'd have to pay rent. It would

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Speaker 1: be twelve hundred dollars a month. I have to pay

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Speaker 1: for the VPN so I can access the internet. Also,

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Speaker 1: i'd have to pay for the internet since you're the

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Speaker 1: only onaey uses anyway. An finished off her list of

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Speaker 1: demands by stating, also, the trust won't be covering your

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Speaker 1: tuition anymore, so you need to pay me back the

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Speaker 1: twenty six thousand dollars that it's paid so far.

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Speaker 3: She can't do that. It's a trust.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, but you should just pay for the one hundred

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Speaker 5: dollars VPN. But now she's taking she's going a little

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Speaker 5: too crazy.

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Speaker 3: I would just move out and not pay her anything.

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Speaker 2: What is happening If she's.

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Speaker 3: Gonna act like that, I'm moving out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you can definitely find a place that is around

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Speaker 1: oneenty twelve hundred. I was silent and just left. I

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Speaker 1: broke down into tears when I got to my car

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Speaker 1: and just started driving. I haven't talked to her since,

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Speaker 1: and I'm just fuming that she would hold my inheritance ransom.

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Speaker 1: I have two months to like graduate, and was planning

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Speaker 1: to just yet out of here the day I do.

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Speaker 1: But every month it's something else that's my fall and

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Speaker 1: I have to pay for it. It started off with groceries.

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Speaker 1: I now buy over half the groceries and make dinner

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Speaker 1: for me and my parents four days a week. You

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Speaker 1: should start making us dinner, since you should learn to cook.

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Speaker 1: And when I got my tax refund, she made me

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Speaker 1: give her half of it because I did your taxes,

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Speaker 1: so I deserve your tax refund, which I didn't ask

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Speaker 1: her to do. Just came home from work one day

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Speaker 1: and she had already filed them. Same thing with the

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Speaker 1: stimulus checks during the VID. You shouldn't have gotten the

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Speaker 1: stimulus check. It should be mine since i'm your brother.

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Speaker 1: After they didn't qualify because their income was too much.

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Speaker 1: Me and my father are going to see a show tonight.

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Speaker 1: He sees the stark contrast in the way she treats

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Speaker 1: me compared to my brother, and has even told me

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Speaker 1: before that I know she treats you differently than everyone else.

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Speaker 1: And you just need to not cause a ruckus or

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Speaker 1: stir up anything with your mother and just leave as

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Speaker 1: soon as you graduate.

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Speaker 6: Dude, call her out. She's your wife.

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Speaker 3: You can't just be like, I don't know, I see it,

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Speaker 3: but like don't say anything.

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Speaker 2: It's probably because he gets a whole earful of it every.

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Speaker 1: Time, but he won't actually stand up to her or

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Speaker 1: post her on anything. So whatever, she says, goes. Any

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Speaker 1: advice would be appreciated.

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Speaker 3: Get out of there.

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Speaker 1: That's all I can say. She's gonna charge you twelve

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Speaker 1: hundred dollars for rent. You're paying for groceries, paying for internet.

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Speaker 1: You could do that without her being there.

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Speaker 5: Well, I'm gonna stand up and I'll host you until

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Speaker 5: you find another place, Opie.

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Speaker 3: Oh that's so nice.

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Speaker 5: And Sophia said she would too for a week. Wow, Opie,

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Speaker 5: you got a place to stay.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to most them at your house.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 1: Comment one says, why don't you block her from the

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Speaker 1: router or report her for doing a huge No? No,

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Speaker 1: oh p says I was thinking about it.

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Speaker 6: But she's also taken.

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Speaker 1: My very valuable computer before and sold it for pennies

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Speaker 1: on the dollar, and I don't want to lose it again.

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Speaker 3: That's illegal hood, that's illegal. Move out, girl, that's wild, truly,

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Speaker 3: Move out.

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Speaker 7: Why are you there?

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Speaker 1: She can't take your trust. I'm pretty sure that's illegal

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Speaker 1: if it specifically was stated that this was for you.

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Speaker 1: Because it's a trust, she just keep you just keep

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Speaker 1: like giving her money that you don't owe her.

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Speaker 2: I don't know why she's doing this too.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Reply says, wait, what, No, that isn't cool. She stole

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Speaker 3: your stuff and sold it. I don't normally.

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Speaker 1: Suggest running to the police, but that right there deserves

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Speaker 1: a complaint to the police. Opie says. It was a

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Speaker 1: few years ago high school, during another spout about internet.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, don't want to provoke her to that point.

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Speaker 6: Again.

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Speaker 1: Common to saysh Hey, Opie, I work at a bank.

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Speaker 1: Is anyone else on the trust or just your mom?

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Speaker 1: Was this money meant for you in a will? You

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Speaker 1: may be able to get free legal counsel at your

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Speaker 1: local city hall or county clerk office. Depending on how

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Speaker 1: things work where you are, bring proper ID and the will,

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Speaker 1: if applicable. Does this trust get released at a certain age,

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Speaker 1: You may be able to file for a different conservator

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Speaker 1: of the account. In the meantime, see if you can

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Speaker 1: talk to someone at the bank about how much is

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Speaker 1: left in the account. Opie says, the trust, to my

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Speaker 1: knowledge is in my name, but the stipulations in the

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Speaker 1: will are that I'm not allowed to touch it until

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Speaker 1: I'm twenty five, except to pay for tuition, and only tuition.

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Speaker 1: But I haven't seen it. YEAHOPI, your mom can't take

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Speaker 1: it from you, and you don't have to pay her

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Speaker 1: back that money.

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Speaker 2: W what is happening right now?

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Speaker 3: Your mom is doing illegal stuff and that seems to

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Speaker 3: be pretty common for her.

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Speaker 2: She had a little bit of a pass four years ago,

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Speaker 2: is it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, this is weird, but I haven't seen it.

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Speaker 1: Me and my brothers and all my cousins got the

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Speaker 1: same stipulations and amounts. As for the rest of it. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm planning on making a swift exit when the time comes.

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Speaker 1: I have a US Mobile SIM card waiting to be activated,

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Speaker 1: and the documents will be tricky since they're in a

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Speaker 1: safe and I don't know where the key is. After

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Speaker 1: this happened, my friends offered to let me store some

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Speaker 1: stuff at their house, which I may do in case

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Speaker 1: things start to become more heated. And we've got an update.

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited to learn how opie uh or what

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Speaker 1: op does in response to all of her mother's illegal activities.

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Speaker 5: And I hope op could maybe press legal action me too.

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Speaker 3: You absolutely can. She's done so many things.

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Speaker 1: But we got an update in response to checking my

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Speaker 1: Social Security number and financials, I know they aren't training

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Speaker 1: my accounts for one reason or another.

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Speaker 3: She isn't in debt or whatnot.

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Speaker 1: Her and my father married, have a mass it's a

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Speaker 1: small fortune where money won't be an.

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Speaker 3: Issue for the rest of their lives.

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Speaker 1: Money won't be an issue, and she won't pay for

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Speaker 1: some streaming platforms.

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Speaker 2: It honestly sounds like Opie being.

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Speaker 5: A d bag at home and the mom's just not

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Speaker 5: having it, so she's putting all these stipulations around.

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: It seems like Opie's dad recognizes that the mom is

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Speaker 1: pretty awful to her, but it's from her.

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Speaker 5: From the mom's perspective, that's how Opie's treating her. Oh oh,

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Speaker 5: I see, yeah, yeah, that's why she's doing it. I

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Speaker 5: can't put a handle on us. I would love to

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Speaker 5: see a dinner with everyone at the table and see

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Speaker 5: the perspective of the family dynamics.

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Speaker 1: Also, as for the trust, I'm not allowed to touch

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Speaker 1: it except for paying a tuition, and only tuition. Also,

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Speaker 1: I just silently paid for a VPN and put it

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Speaker 1: on the boxes last night. I haven't talked to or

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Speaker 1: seen my mother since last night. I'm just going to

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Speaker 1: keep my head down and try to survive another two months.

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Speaker 1: I'm hoping that nothing will come of it till after graduation,

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Speaker 1: in which I'll be long gone. I'm deep into my

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Speaker 1: senior final in college and can't just uproot and leave

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Speaker 1: because I won't have anywhere to set up my desktop

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Speaker 1: to finish it. I could if school wasn't in person

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Speaker 1: this semester. I was planning to move out of state

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Speaker 1: and live with my girlfriend this year, but the college

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Speaker 1: pushed to in person way earlier than anyone expected. And

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Speaker 1: we've got a second update.

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Speaker 2: Goodness, get out of there, man.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, truly, just leap.

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Speaker 1: I'm set to graduate in a week, and I just

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Speaker 1: got a job offer on the other side of the

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Speaker 1: country that will cover all of my moving expenses and

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Speaker 1: help me find a place to stay before I move

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Speaker 1: out there. I'm excited to finally have my freedom and

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Speaker 1: to start everything over.

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Speaker 3: Newtown knew me. There is a little bit left to

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Speaker 3: this story, But do you.

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Speaker 6: Have need final thoughts?

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Speaker 2: Dude could jomp op.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you're finally doing it.

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Speaker 2: Man, No more VPN mom.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, she won't know where you go because you have

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Speaker 5: any VPN now, she can't track you.

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Speaker 3: No, this is super frustrating.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry that you had to deal with this, but

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Speaker 1: I'm glad you're finally getting out of there.

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Speaker 2: Who knew a VPN would cost twenty six thousand dollars.

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Speaker 3: I guess so. Yeah, it's expensive, but there's a little

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Speaker 3: bit left.

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Speaker 1: My mother, of course, was not too happy about this,

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Speaker 1: and has been trying to convince me that moving that

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Speaker 1: far away is unrealistic because it's dangerous and you can't

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Speaker 1: move to a place you've never been. When she finally

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Speaker 1: gave up on that argument, she was trying to get

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Speaker 1: me to ask to start work a month later so

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Speaker 1: I could wait for a real job to come my way.

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Speaker 1: As for the money, I will be paying my whole

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Speaker 1: way through it, of course, so that she can't hold

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Speaker 1: anything over my head and try to guilt trip me

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Speaker 1: for whatever comes to her mind. I also managed to

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Speaker 1: get the account information of my trust and was able

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Speaker 1: to liquidate it early under the stipulation that it'll be

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Speaker 1: used as a down payment on a condo. Also, as

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Speaker 1: for my social and passport, I managed to find the

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Speaker 1: key to the safe they're stored in and we'll be

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Speaker 1: taking them with me when I move out.

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Speaker 3: Ah wow, job, Ope, nice move and slick with it.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, you are.

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Speaker 3: Being very smart and I like it.

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Speaker 2: Where are we moving to? I don't know, Indiana, Aruba, Jamaica.

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Speaker 1: I really want to make you But that's the end

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Speaker 1: of that story, folks, And we've got another one coming

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Speaker 1: right up.

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Speaker 8: My father's girlfriend pestered me to clean my room, so

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Speaker 8: I gave her a reality check. You know my mom,

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Speaker 8: I twenty four female, have been living with my dad

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Speaker 8: and his girlfriend for two years now. Overall, we get

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Speaker 8: along pretty well. My mom lives in another town and

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Speaker 8: she has a mental disease. Long story short, my mom

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Speaker 8: won't get any treatment or therapy, so I just go

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Speaker 8: to see her when I can and try to spend

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Speaker 8: time with her. By the way, this comes from user

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Speaker 8: l Jimmy, and if you want to submit your own stories,

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Speaker 8: go to the r slash Okay story time subvered it.

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Speaker 8: I'm ke On, I'm Angie, and we're here to give

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Speaker 8: good advice. Goofily. We only know what we do. We

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Speaker 8: don't have all the answers, unfortunately, but let us know

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Speaker 8: what you do. In the comments, Opie says, I know

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Speaker 8: she'll never get better and it's been difficult to deal with.

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Speaker 8: I've been going to therapy for almost a year and

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Speaker 8: I've gotten better At handling it, but.

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Speaker 7: It's still hard.

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Speaker 8: I've been dealing with this since I was like around twenty,

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Speaker 8: but I've only started to speak about it more openly

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Speaker 8: now now that I go to therapy. My dad knows this,

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Speaker 8: and so does his girlfriend. I want to visit my

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Speaker 8: mom this weekend. I love her with all my heart,

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Speaker 8: but it always takes a lot of my emotional effort

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Speaker 8: to do this. She has some type of schizophrenia. She

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Speaker 8: hears things, and she genuinely believes that people are after her.

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Speaker 8: In her mind, there are hackers, unalivers and police trying

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Speaker 8: to capture her. Can't explain in detail, but I hope

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Speaker 8: you get the idea. So spending time with my mom

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Speaker 8: is difficult. It's like a life risky mission every day

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Speaker 8: for her. Boy Oh wow, I have fun and we

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Speaker 8: do things together, but it still requires a lot of patience.

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Speaker 8: I came back today Funday evening and Dad's girlfriend asked

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Speaker 8: if I was okay. I said yes. She immediately said,

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Speaker 8: and don't leave your room like that when you leave.

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Speaker 8: This isn't the first time I come back home, and

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Speaker 8: it's the first thing she tells me. I just started

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Speaker 8: crying in silence. I wanted to stop, but I couldn't.

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Speaker 8: I clean up my room every single day for weeks.

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Speaker 8: It was this one day because all my energy was

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Speaker 8: for me to visit my mom. Because, as I said,

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Speaker 8: it is emotionally hard. I really don't think it's that important,

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Speaker 8: not more important than my own mental health at least,

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Speaker 8: And I just barely got home where I feel like

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Speaker 8: I should be able to relax. Maybe a little bit

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Speaker 8: shouldn't give me a break. I didn't even spend five

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Speaker 8: minutes home, so once she noticed I was crying, I

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Speaker 8: just said everything I told her. She could have waited

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Speaker 8: for me to settle for just a little bit before

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Speaker 8: telling me, or just trust that I'd do it tomorrow

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Speaker 8: morning I was going to do so that what I'm

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Speaker 8: doing is emotionally draining, and that it's just this one day.

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Speaker 8: I just got here, and I should be able to

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Speaker 8: relax at home, that I have a process, that my

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Speaker 8: mom will never get better, and while I may look

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Speaker 8: okay on the outside, I am fighting every day on

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Speaker 8: the inside. I told her all this and more, but

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Speaker 8: I tried not to hurt her and be careful with

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Speaker 8: my words. But it looked like she was feeling bad anyway.

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Speaker 8: Even though my point was only that I needed a

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Speaker 8: bit more patience and sensibility. I told her I don't

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Speaker 8: want her to feel bad, just to consider how hard

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Speaker 8: it can be for me. There was a lot of

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Speaker 8: tension before they went to sleep. I thought about apologizing,

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Speaker 8: but I didn't. I just don't feel sorry. It's how

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Speaker 8: I felt, and I was trying to communicate how she

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Speaker 8: made me feel. But I don't know. Maybe I was

355
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Speaker 8: too sensible and dramatic, or maybe she didn't understand me.

356
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Speaker 8: I'm not sure. Am I the a hole? And there

357
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Speaker 8: is an update? What say you, Angie?

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Speaker 3: I don't think so.

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Speaker 9: I think you're going through a really hard time and

360
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Speaker 9: you're totally fine in sharing your feelings.

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Speaker 3: You weren't even saying like.

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Speaker 9: You're a terrible like, uh, you're a terrible person for

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Speaker 9: saying this, and that you're blah blah blah blah, like

364
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Speaker 9: you were just saying this is how insane I feel

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Speaker 9: right now.

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Speaker 8: Yeah, and I just need.

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Speaker 7: You to know that.

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Speaker 8: Yeah. No, I wholeheartedly agree. I think there's a time

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Speaker 8: and place for things, especially if she knew you want

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Speaker 8: to go see your mom. And sure you may seem

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Speaker 8: okay on the outside, but she should have a clue

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Speaker 8: you're your dad's girlfriend should have a clue that, like, yeah,

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Speaker 8: that's definitely draining. And the one thing she says to you,

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Speaker 8: not even with like first thing you come through the door,

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Speaker 8: is how are you okay? Go clean your room? Make

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Speaker 8: sure not have to leave your room like that. Yeah,

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Speaker 8: like we read the room, read like come on, just

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Speaker 8: have a send a little bit of sensibility like oh,

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Speaker 8: I'm gonna cook dinner. Uh, you know, I saw your room.

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00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,840
Speaker 8: Maybe you should have clean up her room for her,

381
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Speaker 8: just to do something nice. I mean, she doesn't have to,

382
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:28,600
Speaker 8: but come on, it's kind of just read the room

383
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Speaker 8: or read the person. It's not hard and like put

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Speaker 8: two and two together.

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Speaker 3: Don't talk to a twenty four year old like that.

386
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Speaker 8: Yeah, I can see op. Just be like what's your problem?

387
00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:37,360
Speaker 4: Yea?

388
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:40,160
Speaker 8: Yeah, like what come on? We do have an update.

389
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Speaker 8: It has been almost a month a month since I

390
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:45,520
Speaker 8: made this post, and I wanted to post an update.

391
00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:47,960
Speaker 8: So some of you said that Dad's girlfriend wants me

392
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Speaker 8: out of the house. That is not true, thankfully, but

393
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:54,360
Speaker 8: it did make me think about why she seemed to

394
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Speaker 8: think I didn't help enough. While I thought I did,

395
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:59,000
Speaker 8: I noticed that every time I offer to do something,

396
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Speaker 8: she always says no. If I say can I help

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00:17:02,080 --> 00:17:06,520
Speaker 8: you with that, the answer is no. If I say, hey,

398
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:10,560
Speaker 8: I can buy that for you, another no, It doesn't

399
00:17:10,560 --> 00:17:13,920
Speaker 8: matter what it is, she always refuses. After a couple

400
00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:15,479
Speaker 8: of days, I asked her if she was hurt by

401
00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:19,040
Speaker 8: my words. It was awkward and tends to bring it up,

402
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:21,720
Speaker 8: but I knew it was needed. She said yes, because

403
00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:23,639
Speaker 8: I was only telling you to do your room and

404
00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:24,800
Speaker 8: you made me feel bad.

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Speaker 3: I don't like it. I like it, well, you made

406
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Speaker 3: me feel bad like that.

407
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:33,320
Speaker 9: Whole explanation was that you made me feel bad for

408
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Speaker 9: telling me to make my room.

409
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Speaker 8: Especially if OPI did say she makes her room consistently.

410
00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:42,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, like, just don't go in there. I can't deal

411
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,439
Speaker 3: with that right now? Come on.

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00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:48,080
Speaker 8: Yeah, I explain this time much more calmly, that the

413
00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:50,560
Speaker 8: problem wasn't saying it, only that I wish she would

414
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Speaker 8: have waited a few minutes.

415
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Speaker 6: Yeah.

416
00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:55,639
Speaker 8: Then I told her that if she always refuses my help,

417
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Speaker 8: I'll end up assuming she doesn't want me to. Her

418
00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:02,240
Speaker 8: answer was, that's just how I am. I say no

419
00:18:02,359 --> 00:18:05,000
Speaker 8: because I feel bad. I would rather you just do

420
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Speaker 8: it because you want.

421
00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:09,679
Speaker 9: To help oh my god, this How is this supposed

422
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:11,920
Speaker 9: to be like someone that's older than.

423
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Speaker 3: Op right now?

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Speaker 7: Can you?

425
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,600
Speaker 8: Yeah? She's saying, read my mind. Obviously when I say no,

426
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:20,080
Speaker 8: it means yes. Ope, you continues saying, I explain that

427
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,840
Speaker 8: me asking this because I want to help, But from

428
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:24,680
Speaker 8: now on I want to ask, I'll just do it.

429
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:26,640
Speaker 8: I also noticed that most of a free time ends

430
00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:28,840
Speaker 8: up being for cooking all the meals. I used to

431
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:30,800
Speaker 8: do some of the cooking as well, but since she

432
00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:32,960
Speaker 8: spent some time without a job, she did all the

433
00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:35,240
Speaker 8: cooking again. So I offered her to do the cooking

434
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Speaker 8: so she can have a bit more time to herself.

435
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:40,080
Speaker 8: After she agreed, I told her that's what I asked

436
00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:42,640
Speaker 8: from her, is to take it slow and to get

437
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,280
Speaker 8: me some space after I come back from visiting my mom.

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Speaker 8: She seemed to be happy with everything I said. She said,

439
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:50,800
Speaker 8: I know I'm not your mom, but I try to

440
00:18:50,840 --> 00:18:53,080
Speaker 8: treat you like you're my daughter. I told her that

441
00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:55,760
Speaker 8: I know that I appreciate it and that I love her.

442
00:18:56,119 --> 00:18:56,679
Speaker 8: We hugged.

443
00:18:57,480 --> 00:19:01,639
Speaker 9: I have some some uh I guess hesitations with that

444
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:05,840
Speaker 9: with like I would rather, I don't know, I would

445
00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:08,600
Speaker 9: probably say things differently I would probably accept things differently,

446
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:11,840
Speaker 9: but I'm gonna trust Opie in that this was like

447
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:14,640
Speaker 9: a good resolve to this issue.

448
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:17,400
Speaker 8: This also seems like, most likely from what we got

449
00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:22,000
Speaker 8: from the story, probably like the first like genuine not

450
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:27,400
Speaker 8: necessarily argument, but like a real serious talk between her

451
00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:30,920
Speaker 8: and you. Yeah, like a lot of emotions flared up,

452
00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:33,800
Speaker 8: and it was probably very awkward for both of you.

453
00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:36,560
Speaker 8: I think this was the best thing, Opi. It's very

454
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,840
Speaker 8: crazy that you had to go to apologize to her,

455
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:44,400
Speaker 8: to like give out the olive branch of peace. She's

456
00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:47,800
Speaker 8: the adult, but you're being very mature, which I get again.

457
00:19:48,359 --> 00:19:50,840
Speaker 8: Very good that you guys figured it out, and hopefully

458
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:52,760
Speaker 8: she can give you the space you need when you

459
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:56,199
Speaker 8: come home. Yeah, and just some like support if you

460
00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:59,720
Speaker 8: need it and go to her for support. So I

461
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:01,439
Speaker 8: think this is a good thing and I think it's

462
00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:02,200
Speaker 8: all gonna work out.

463
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:05,399
Speaker 9: Pops, do you, Opium, Yeah, you're a lot nicer than

464
00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:06,040
Speaker 9: I would have been.

465
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:09,800
Speaker 8: Yeah, let's go ahead and finish up the story. It's been

466
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:11,600
Speaker 8: a few weeks since that, and I think we're at

467
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:14,320
Speaker 8: a good point. I have been doing most of the housework,

468
00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:15,919
Speaker 8: and I think she sees that I really want to

469
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:19,080
Speaker 8: help instead. One day, something bad happened to my mom,

470
00:20:19,359 --> 00:20:21,879
Speaker 8: and my dad's girlfriend was very understanding and let me

471
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,200
Speaker 8: slack off a bit when I wasn't well. I think

472
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,560
Speaker 8: we both understand each other a bit better. I get

473
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:29,280
Speaker 8: the feeling. They always say I'm the dramatic one, but

474
00:20:29,320 --> 00:20:31,880
Speaker 8: I'm the only one that actually starts the difficult conversations

475
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 8: which we called out earlier.

476
00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:34,200
Speaker 6: Yeah.

477
00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,520
Speaker 8: I talked about everything with my therapist and she says

478
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,439
Speaker 8: I handled everything very well and that she's very happy

479
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:42,320
Speaker 8: with my progress in general. I didn't have the chance

480
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:44,080
Speaker 8: to talk with my dad about this yet, but I

481
00:20:44,119 --> 00:20:46,040
Speaker 8: want to know his take on this, so maybe I'll

482
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:48,240
Speaker 8: still end up doing it. I hope I can improve

483
00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:50,920
Speaker 8: our relationships as we go on. I wanted to thank

484
00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:53,359
Speaker 8: everyone who took the time to reply. Many of you

485
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:57,080
Speaker 8: said kind, caring words, and I really appreciate it. And

486
00:20:57,119 --> 00:20:58,439
Speaker 8: that is you know that story?

487
00:20:58,560 --> 00:21:01,720
Speaker 3: Well okay, well, great, good for you, Op.

488
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:08,040
Speaker 8: Look at you, OP being the pathfinder, the trans setter

489
00:21:08,119 --> 00:21:11,199
Speaker 8: for communication in the household. I love that.

490
00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:12,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly.

491
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 9: I think this is a perfect example of you know,

492
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,320
Speaker 9: you did a good job of not escalating the situation,

493
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:23,320
Speaker 9: but still handling it and confronting it, and you found.

494
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:26,320
Speaker 3: A solution and it was very healthy communication. Honestly.

495
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:30,560
Speaker 8: Yeah, good job. And I help things with your mother

496
00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:33,400
Speaker 8: in general, not your dad's girlfriend, but your mother. They

497
00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:36,399
Speaker 8: do get better. Yeah, but I know it seems like

498
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:38,520
Speaker 8: you have a support system, you have a therapist. But

499
00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:43,639
Speaker 8: we hope things go smooth on that front.

500
00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 3: Absolutely.

501
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,159
Speaker 10: And that's the end of this story. We're going on

502
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:48,840
Speaker 10: to the next one.

503
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:53,040
Speaker 3: My ex's girlfriend confronted me, so I said, her insecurities

504
00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:54,440
Speaker 3: are not my problem.

505
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:56,679
Speaker 6: They're not your problem. Joy your warning.

506
00:21:56,800 --> 00:22:00,840
Speaker 3: Brief mention of child loss. At the beginning. Twenty eight

507
00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:04,520
Speaker 3: female dated my ex Harold twenty nine male through middle school.

508
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:08,159
Speaker 3: Horrible name. Sorry sorry, but like what just sounds like

509
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:11,840
Speaker 3: an old man? Nah? Anyway, I twenty eight female, dated

510
00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:15,440
Speaker 3: my ex Harold twenty nine male, through middle school, high

511
00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:18,119
Speaker 3: school and college. I thought I'd be with him for

512
00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:21,359
Speaker 3: the rest of my life, that we grow old together, old,

513
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:26,280
Speaker 3: that we grow old together surrounded by kids and eventually grandkids.

514
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:29,200
Speaker 3: We still love each other, but the relationship ended six

515
00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:29,760
Speaker 3: years ago.

516
00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:30,639
Speaker 6: Oh.

517
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,200
Speaker 3: It was a mutual choice because we knew we'd be

518
00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:39,280
Speaker 3: better off apart. This comes from temper sir, and if

519
00:22:39,320 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 3: you want usubmit your own stories, go to the r

520
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:45,040
Speaker 3: slash Okay story time subreddit. I'm Savannah, I'm Carly, I'm Keon,

521
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:47,320
Speaker 3: and we are here to give some good advice. Goofly.

522
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:49,560
Speaker 3: We don't have all the answers. We don't only tell

523
00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:51,720
Speaker 3: you what we would do in the situation, baby, so

524
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,240
Speaker 3: let us know what you would do in the comments.

525
00:22:54,720 --> 00:22:58,320
Speaker 3: As Opie says, we had just moved into our first

526
00:22:58,320 --> 00:23:01,880
Speaker 3: apartment when I found out I was preggy. We were

527
00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 3: twenty two and terrified, but we decided to figure it out.

528
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:08,120
Speaker 3: The nursery was halfway done when I lost our daughter

529
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:13,960
Speaker 3: at twenty five weeks. Oo ah, that's horrid. I don't

530
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:17,359
Speaker 3: even know like I mean, I I ugh, I would

531
00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 3: just hate my life. I would just I don't know.

532
00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:21,439
Speaker 6: What I would do.

533
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:25,440
Speaker 3: I don't talk about it much, and neither does Harold. Well, yes,

534
00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:28,280
Speaker 3: that makes sense. We tried to hold it together after that,

535
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:31,000
Speaker 3: but losing her torus apart as a couple, and we

536
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:33,280
Speaker 3: didn't know how to fix it. He still sends me

537
00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:35,120
Speaker 3: flowers on Mother's Day and I send him a card

538
00:23:35,119 --> 00:23:38,200
Speaker 3: on Father's Day. We even call each other every year.

539
00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:44,119
Speaker 3: On her birthday. Oh, I mean, I'm gonna cry m.

540
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 6: She went straight into the sads today. I know.

541
00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:51,000
Speaker 3: Since we went to college together, we have mutual friends,

542
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:53,520
Speaker 3: so I sometimes run into him at get together's. I

543
00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:56,240
Speaker 3: attended a friend's birthday dinner and saw Harold there with

544
00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:59,439
Speaker 3: his new girlfriend. She was weirdly rude to me the

545
00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:02,159
Speaker 3: entire time, which was strange because I had never met

546
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:05,480
Speaker 3: her before. Apparently, Harold told her that he and I

547
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:08,080
Speaker 3: used to date, but didn't share the full details because

548
00:24:08,119 --> 00:24:10,800
Speaker 3: they haven't been together long and he wasn't ready to

549
00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:13,679
Speaker 3: discuss it. Later, she cornered me in the bathroom and

550
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:15,679
Speaker 3: said she didn't like how close I was to Harold.

551
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,720
Speaker 3: She said six years was plenty of time to get

552
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:21,280
Speaker 3: over whatever baggage I had, and accused me of being

553
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:24,639
Speaker 3: desperate to get him back. I was already annoyed after

554
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:26,960
Speaker 3: her rudeness all night, so I told her that the

555
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:30,680
Speaker 3: baggage she referred to was our child and that Harold

556
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:34,200
Speaker 3: would very likely never get over her either. I said

557
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:36,800
Speaker 3: her insecurity wasn't my issue, and that if she wanted

558
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:38,639
Speaker 3: to be with Harold, she would have to accept my

559
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:43,200
Speaker 3: presence because I wasn't going anywhere. Okay, Right, but did you.

560
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:47,199
Speaker 4: Just drop the truth bomb about this kid because she

561
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:48,119
Speaker 4: didn't know about that?

562
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 3: Right, I don't know. I mean, op, I don't think

563
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:55,200
Speaker 3: knows either. She got red in the face and left

564
00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:57,480
Speaker 3: the bathroom. Yeah, I don't think she knew. When I

565
00:24:57,520 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 3: walked out later, both she and Harold were gone.

566
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:01,119
Speaker 2: Oh.

567
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 3: I told her our mutual friend would happen, and he

568
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:05,159
Speaker 3: said I was an a hole because she didn't know

569
00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:08,399
Speaker 3: the full situation. Well, she was the Yeah, she was

570
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:09,920
Speaker 3: the a hole for coming up and be like I

571
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,679
Speaker 3: don't like how close you are blah blah blah.

572
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:14,639
Speaker 4: Okay, but this is why I was curious about the

573
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:18,680
Speaker 4: timeline of them dating, because how many like how far

574
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 4: in before that, like truth coming out is like, oh

575
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:24,120
Speaker 4: my god, that's like, like, why haven't you.

576
00:25:24,119 --> 00:25:25,320
Speaker 6: Told me this kind of thing?

577
00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 3: Like that's why I'm.

578
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 6: Like, it must be really really new.

579
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:31,800
Speaker 3: He thought she reacted the way any woman would when

580
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:33,920
Speaker 3: they think someone is trying to get at their boyfriend,

581
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 3: and suggested I should have been mindful that she wasn't

582
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 3: aware of the circumstances. If it was too much, I

583
00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:42,080
Speaker 3: would apologize, but I wasn't sure if I went too

584
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 3: far am i.

585
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:45,240
Speaker 6: Ma a al. I don't think.

586
00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:50,440
Speaker 3: I don't a whole No. I think that she obviously

587
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:53,400
Speaker 3: felt threatened by you because you're still in this guy's life,

588
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 3: even though, like you know, she doesn't know the full

589
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 3: situation and whatnot. But she should have asked him. She

590
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:01,879
Speaker 3: should have went to him first. You know, obviously he

591
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,560
Speaker 3: has shared that they were a thing before, and she

592
00:26:04,680 --> 00:26:07,800
Speaker 3: understands that, but immediately just going to like hate this girl,

593
00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:08,240
Speaker 3: you know.

594
00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:10,720
Speaker 4: But that's and it's not a pea's fault for dropping

595
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:14,080
Speaker 4: that accidentally, not knowing that Harold hadn't told her yet.

596
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:18,159
Speaker 4: Like that's something they're celebrating so deeply, you'd assume like

597
00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 4: he would say that pretty quickly.

598
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:25,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, like especially if like you guys are still in

599
00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:29,119
Speaker 3: contact like every year at least like for something. So

600
00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:31,560
Speaker 3: it's just I don't know it. To me, I do

601
00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:34,359
Speaker 3: not think that you were the a hole outpi uh.

602
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:37,400
Speaker 3: Here's in comments common number one. That's the a hole.

603
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:40,760
Speaker 3: She had no business approaching you. Her relationship is with

604
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:44,159
Speaker 3: your ex. She should discuss any concerns about his relationship

605
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:46,239
Speaker 3: with you with him and leave you out of it.

606
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:49,080
Speaker 7: That's what I said, Lego.

607
00:26:49,760 --> 00:26:54,040
Speaker 3: Your mutual friend's attitude is strange. No, any women would

608
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:57,639
Speaker 3: not approach an ex at a party and create drama.

609
00:26:57,880 --> 00:27:00,399
Speaker 3: That's not what normal women do. When she used to

610
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:03,960
Speaker 3: hold outsiders accountable for our relationships, we choose to hear

611
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,760
Speaker 3: things we may not want to hear. That's the situation

612
00:27:06,840 --> 00:27:10,320
Speaker 3: this woman created for herself. You didn't say anything unexpected

613
00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 3: or over the top. Her choices are to continue dating

614
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:16,960
Speaker 3: your ex or not. You're not involved in any way.

615
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:19,119
Speaker 3: He is the only person who is responsible for his

616
00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:22,960
Speaker 3: relationship with this other woman. There is a reply. Also,

617
00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 3: all OP did was show up to a mutual friend's party.

618
00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:29,200
Speaker 3: I don't know where the mutual friend got going after

619
00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:33,520
Speaker 3: your ex. Part of this from unless Harold still talks

620
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:35,720
Speaker 3: about Op as if he's still in love with her,

621
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:39,760
Speaker 3: But then that would be a Harold issue, not an

622
00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 3: Op issue.

623
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 6: Yeah great, Yeah.

624
00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:45,080
Speaker 7: Come on, Number two.

625
00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:48,080
Speaker 3: Says not the a hole. She reacted the way any

626
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:52,320
Speaker 3: woman would. No, I'm a woman and I wouldn't. If

627
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:54,600
Speaker 3: I trust my man, then I don't care what other

628
00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:58,120
Speaker 3: hot women tried to do. It's what he does that matters.

629
00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:00,520
Speaker 3: She attacked you for no reason but jealous, and you

630
00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 3: defended yourself she needed to hear that to understand the

631
00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:07,680
Speaker 3: bond you too will share forever and sorry for your

632
00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:11,800
Speaker 3: loss and pain. I hope you find your peace. Oh

633
00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:15,760
Speaker 3: edit to add info, I do love Harold, but I

634
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,760
Speaker 3: am not in love with him. There is nothing romantic

635
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,320
Speaker 3: about our current feelings. I've known him my whole life.

636
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 3: He was my child's father and my best friend. I

637
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,120
Speaker 3: will always care for him. I have no idea why

638
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 3: she thought I wanted him back. I'm currently engaged and

639
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:32,360
Speaker 3: have been in therapy, as has Harold. Both therapists support

640
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:35,240
Speaker 3: how we honor our daughter's memory. At at number three,

641
00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:39,400
Speaker 3: our daughter was born after early labor and passed away

642
00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:41,920
Speaker 3: an hour later, so she had a birthday.

643
00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:42,840
Speaker 7: Ah.

644
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:47,240
Speaker 3: I mean that's like, that gives me chills because I

645
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:50,960
Speaker 3: just to go through something like that, all of this

646
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:55,040
Speaker 3: like work and excitement and anxiety, to go through all

647
00:28:55,080 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 3: of this to just be like, oh, that's exciting, that's

648
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 3: what's gonna be part of my life now.

649
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, it makes me even more like, Wow, this new

650
00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:08,080
Speaker 4: girlfriend's really the a hole if.

651
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,480
Speaker 6: She's literally at this party fully engaged.

652
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:14,200
Speaker 4: Like yeah, and you're cornering her in the bathroom going

653
00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:16,840
Speaker 4: I know you still want my man, and it's like, girl,

654
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:20,080
Speaker 4: we just learned you haven't been around very long and

655
00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:24,360
Speaker 4: I'm engaged, Like, whoa, we have not.

656
00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:27,120
Speaker 3: Been together for six years. I call him once a

657
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 3: year to celebrate the horrible event or to honor a

658
00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 3: horrible a horrible event, not celebrating it, but like and

659
00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:39,680
Speaker 3: and that's that's what you're gonna do to a person

660
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:42,040
Speaker 3: who don't even know and like don't know the story

661
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:44,880
Speaker 3: just is gonna just be like jump and just be like, yeah,

662
00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:47,280
Speaker 3: this is who I am and I need to assert

663
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:50,600
Speaker 3: my dominance. Like okay, and how that turn out?

664
00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:51,400
Speaker 7: Now?

665
00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:54,080
Speaker 3: You're an a hole and ever on the internet thing?

666
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 3: So too got him? There's an update, Hi, I thought

667
00:29:59,920 --> 00:30:01,440
Speaker 3: I i'd give you guys an update on the situation

668
00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:04,120
Speaker 3: since it's more or less over now. I was able

669
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 3: to call Harold and talk to him about what happened.

670
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:09,120
Speaker 3: I started to apologize about telling his girlfriend about our

671
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:11,280
Speaker 3: daughter before he was ready to share that with her,

672
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 3: but he told me I didn't need to be sorry

673
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 3: at all. They had left the party early because apparently

674
00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 3: everyone had heard her going off on me in the bathroom.

675
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 3: They didn't hear my response, but when she came out

676
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 3: looking red in the face. They pretty much all assumed

677
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 3: that I had at the very least said something back

678
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,120
Speaker 3: to her that hurt her feelings. Harold and his girlfriend

679
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 3: started arguing about it, and he thought it was best

680
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 3: not to further disrupt the party. He didn't know how

681
00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:38,080
Speaker 3: to broach the situation with me after she told him

682
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:40,160
Speaker 3: the full story, because he figured I would be really

683
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 3: hurt and upset about the whole thing. I did want

684
00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:43,959
Speaker 3: to know why she thought that I might have been

685
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:46,600
Speaker 3: trying to get him back when we've been separated for

686
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:49,320
Speaker 3: six years and I'm engaged, So I asked him if

687
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:52,000
Speaker 3: he knew. He admitted that before I got to the

688
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:54,640
Speaker 3: party that night, as he and his girlfriend were coming in,

689
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 3: someone brought up my engagement, and then another person said

690
00:30:57,760 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 3: something about how they had never imagined that Harold and

691
00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:03,040
Speaker 3: I would have ended up with anyone but one another.

692
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,800
Speaker 4: Oh, well, that friend's a little ahold and yeah says.

693
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:12,520
Speaker 3: That, yeah, yeah, I mean, I can't believe you're with

694
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:13,560
Speaker 3: another person.

695
00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:16,040
Speaker 6: Here you are, You're like, this is my girlfriend.

696
00:31:16,040 --> 00:31:18,600
Speaker 4: Guys like I like nice, Like I'm happy you guys

697
00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:21,320
Speaker 4: get to me and they're like, I never thought you

698
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:23,560
Speaker 4: would have broken up with so and so who will

699
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:25,200
Speaker 4: be here in five minutes.

700
00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:30,160
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'd be like, why am I here? I'd be

701
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:31,240
Speaker 6: like should I leave?

702
00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 10: You?

703
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,760
Speaker 6: Guys need a moment like thanks for making me feel

704
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:37,280
Speaker 6: really awkward at this, It was so nice to meet you.

705
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:38,920
Speaker 6: Thank you for the invite.

706
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:41,520
Speaker 3: Harold said he just pretended not to hear the conversation,

707
00:31:41,640 --> 00:31:44,600
Speaker 3: but I guess him not immediately shutting it down made

708
00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:48,360
Speaker 3: his girlfriend upset. Evidently I have always been a sore

709
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 3: spot for her since Harold told her that he and

710
00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:53,160
Speaker 3: I were together for so long. So I guess that

711
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:54,000
Speaker 3: just made it worse.

712
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:57,320
Speaker 4: Sounds like your friends Loki suck a little bit, Like

713
00:31:57,440 --> 00:32:00,600
Speaker 4: I'd be more mad, but I can. I can always

714
00:32:00,640 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 4: understand that it's hard to come into somewhere where it's

715
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:06,160
Speaker 4: like you're both coming You're the new person coming into

716
00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:09,600
Speaker 4: something where it's like your person still has a person

717
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:12,440
Speaker 4: in the group, you know what I mean, Like you're

718
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:14,520
Speaker 4: a person's exes in the group, she's gonna be there.

719
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 4: You're coming in. You're the new person, whether being the

720
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:21,240
Speaker 4: friends or the new person. Like you never bring that up.

721
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, you would never be like, wow, I really thought

722
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:25,200
Speaker 6: that you guys.

723
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:27,360
Speaker 3: No, it's been six years.

724
00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:28,520
Speaker 6: Why are we bringing this up?

725
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:30,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, this girl is new, she's.

726
00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 4: Meeting you guys, all potentially for the first time. It

727
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:37,640
Speaker 4: sounds like now and the other person's engaged, and this

728
00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 4: is what we're bringing up.

729
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:39,680
Speaker 8: Yeah.

730
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:42,320
Speaker 6: I mean, it's the crappiest thing to say to someone

731
00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:42,800
Speaker 6: coming in.

732
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:43,200
Speaker 7: Hi.

733
00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 6: Nice to make you. Really didn't think you'd be here

734
00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:50,240
Speaker 6: because we thought he'd marry her. I'd have a good party.

735
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 3: Oh, guys, should I go jump off that cliff?

736
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:53,040
Speaker 4: Wait?

737
00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:55,760
Speaker 3: I'm like, do you have a balcony of what's happening here?

738
00:32:57,200 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 3: The two of them have broken up now though, Oh okay, wait,

739
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:03,880
Speaker 3: I want Harold to be happy, and I've never wanted

740
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:07,040
Speaker 3: to intervene in any of his relationships. He assured me

741
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:09,520
Speaker 3: that he doesn't blame me for it or anything, so

742
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:10,600
Speaker 3: that did help.

743
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 6: Me feel a little less guilty. You didn't do anything.

744
00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:15,760
Speaker 3: I do want to thank all of you who expressed condolences.

745
00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 3: You're all so kind, and I wish I'd been able

746
00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:20,320
Speaker 3: to respond to you individually. I just had a lot

747
00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:23,960
Speaker 3: going on. I appreciate everyone's feedback too. It was really helpful.

748
00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 3: And yes, I later informed my friend that most women

749
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,000
Speaker 3: don't get weirdly jealous and react like that.

750
00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:32,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, most girls will not then immediately confront him in

751
00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:32,840
Speaker 4: the bathroom.

752
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 6: That still makes her weird.

753
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:37,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, and it's also like she's gotta be comfortable with that.

754
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:38,800
Speaker 4: If this is something that you guys have done for

755
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:41,000
Speaker 4: six years and like means a lot to both of you,

756
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:42,560
Speaker 4: there's clearly nothing going on.

757
00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:45,960
Speaker 10: Yeah, and that's the end of this story. We're going

758
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:46,880
Speaker 10: on to the next one.

759
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:50,480
Speaker 6: My girlfriend hangs out with my roommate in his room

760
00:33:50,880 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 6: when I go to sleep.

761
00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:54,560
Speaker 3: Oh, that's nah.

762
00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:58,840
Speaker 4: That sus My girlfriend, twenty female and I at twenty

763
00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:01,840
Speaker 4: two male, have been together since high school. We go

764
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:04,440
Speaker 4: to the same college and she basically lives with me.

765
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 4: We live in a four bedroom apartment with three other guys.

766
00:34:08,440 --> 00:34:10,759
Speaker 4: My roommate and I hang out a lot with my girlfriend,

767
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:13,840
Speaker 4: but she gets along especially well with one.

768
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:15,760
Speaker 6: We'll call him Chet.

769
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:16,279
Speaker 3: By the way.

770
00:34:16,320 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 4: This comes from Mona Lisa's Sapperstein and if you want

771
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:20,560
Speaker 4: to submit your own stories.

772
00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 6: Go to the r slash Okay storytime sub reread it.

773
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:25,120
Speaker 4: I'm carly On, Savannah, I'm Keon, and we're here to

774
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:25,760
Speaker 4: give good advice.

775
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:26,840
Speaker 6: Goofully, but we don't.

776
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:28,719
Speaker 4: Have all the answers. We only know what we would do,

777
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:29,920
Speaker 4: so let us know what you would do in the

778
00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:35,839
Speaker 4: comments and no. Pisas Chet is really close with my girlfriend.

779
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 4: When I go to sleep, I go to bed really early.

780
00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:41,840
Speaker 4: She goes and hangs out in his room. When I

781
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:43,920
Speaker 4: ask her about it, she tells me what good friends

782
00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:46,600
Speaker 4: they are, and goes into detail about how she could

783
00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:50,640
Speaker 4: just never even imagine his lips touching hers, that it

784
00:34:50,680 --> 00:34:53,399
Speaker 4: makes her sick to think about. Pardon me, believes her,

785
00:34:53,440 --> 00:34:55,879
Speaker 4: but part of me wonders why she goes into such

786
00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:59,960
Speaker 4: detail about how repulsed she is by this idea. Recently,

787
00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:03,360
Speaker 4: they got into a fight because his girlfriend doesn't like

788
00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:04,239
Speaker 4: my girlfriend.

789
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:07,719
Speaker 8: I wonder why this.

790
00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:10,120
Speaker 3: Smit's still a mystery.

791
00:35:11,040 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 4: This fight ended in him buying her her favorite snacks

792
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:15,480
Speaker 4: and leaving them on our beds.

793
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:16,839
Speaker 6: Wait what he.

794
00:35:16,840 --> 00:35:19,840
Speaker 8: Bought your He bought Op's girlfriend?

795
00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 6: Yeah, her girlfriend, Yeah.

796
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:24,560
Speaker 8: Not his own girlfriend.

797
00:35:27,560 --> 00:35:28,719
Speaker 7: I would be pissed.

798
00:35:29,680 --> 00:35:32,760
Speaker 3: I'd be like, uh, where the f is my sweet treat? Huh?

799
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:35,759
Speaker 6: Also, like if they live in a four bedroom place, like.

800
00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:40,120
Speaker 4: Why they don't have like a common area.

801
00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:45,040
Speaker 3: Nope, it's just there, it's just the beds. It's just

802
00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:46,400
Speaker 3: their beds and maybe a kitchen.

803
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:49,720
Speaker 4: It seems like way too intimate to just be friends

804
00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:52,040
Speaker 4: to me, but I'm afraid to flat out ask her

805
00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:54,799
Speaker 4: if they're sleeping together. I don't want to ruin our

806
00:35:54,840 --> 00:35:57,560
Speaker 4: relationship over them just having a nice friendship.

807
00:35:57,760 --> 00:35:59,919
Speaker 6: I don't know what to do. Am I the a hole?

808
00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:02,359
Speaker 6: You seem way too calm about.

809
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:05,719
Speaker 3: This, Yeah, that's how I would be too, though.

810
00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:08,440
Speaker 4: I'd be like, I just like overreacting, and they're like,

811
00:36:09,719 --> 00:36:12,000
Speaker 4: his girlfriend really doesn't like my girlfriend?

812
00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:15,799
Speaker 6: Yeah, I wouldn't either, I don't.

813
00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:18,800
Speaker 8: I think the best way to go about this, Opie

814
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:22,239
Speaker 8: is first and foremost, tell your girlfriend you're uncomfortable that

815
00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:26,840
Speaker 8: your girlfriend, your own girlfriend, hangs out in your roommate's

816
00:36:26,960 --> 00:36:31,239
Speaker 8: room after you've go to bed, Like, why she? Why

817
00:36:31,280 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 8: is she doing that?

818
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:32,640
Speaker 6: Yeah?

819
00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:36,439
Speaker 4: Top rolevant comment seth W ninety five says, if both

820
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:38,480
Speaker 4: you and his girlfriend have an issue with it, I

821
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 4: think there might be something to your suspicion, Opie. All

822
00:36:42,360 --> 00:36:46,319
Speaker 4: four Goby says, as a person named Chet, I apologize

823
00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 4: on behalf of the other Chet, and he might totally

824
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 4: be doing your girlfriend.

825
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:54,799
Speaker 6: It's totally a CHET thing to do. Chat. What are

826
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:55,319
Speaker 6: you doing?

827
00:36:56,239 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 3: Chat? What are you doing?

828
00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:02,239
Speaker 8: Im just outs to himself. I only know him like

829
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 8: one chet.

830
00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:03,960
Speaker 6: You know a chet?

831
00:37:04,480 --> 00:37:07,759
Speaker 8: Yeah, never ch. I knew him in high school and

832
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:09,920
Speaker 8: I would say this is a chet thing to do.

833
00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:11,239
Speaker 8: I was in front with him.

834
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 4: Maybe this is your chats the only chat in the world,

835
00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:16,680
Speaker 4: preference roommate.

836
00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:20,280
Speaker 8: Maybe chet is a hard name to find these days.

837
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:23,719
Speaker 4: Hit Commentary three says, I think it's interesting that his

838
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:26,880
Speaker 4: girlfriend doesn't like your girlfriend. Does she have a reason

839
00:37:26,920 --> 00:37:29,719
Speaker 4: for this or does she suspect the same thing that

840
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:34,000
Speaker 4: you suspect. Sam's on It says, yeah, I think perhaps

841
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:36,319
Speaker 4: OP should confront her about this to know if they

842
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:39,640
Speaker 4: have the same feeling. The Mockingbird says, pretend to go

843
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:42,520
Speaker 4: to bed and stay up instead, wait a few hours.

844
00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:45,080
Speaker 4: Catching them in the act will certainly clear things up.

845
00:37:45,480 --> 00:37:48,880
Speaker 4: Confronting her will probably make her and him stop or

846
00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 4: be more cautious, assuming she is cheating in this scenario.

847
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:56,480
Speaker 4: Rook eighty eight seventy five says, all right, dude, here's

848
00:37:56,560 --> 00:38:00,360
Speaker 4: your game plan. Go to bed, say you aren't feeling well.

849
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:03,439
Speaker 6: She'll go to his room. You enter after a bit.

850
00:38:03,640 --> 00:38:05,600
Speaker 4: If it's clear and they're just chilling, go in and

851
00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:09,000
Speaker 4: say that you're feeling sick and need help, so they

852
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:10,560
Speaker 4: don't think you were trying to catch them.

853
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:11,800
Speaker 3: If they are.

854
00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:14,360
Speaker 4: Doing something, you caught them, and then you know. The

855
00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:16,200
Speaker 4: main thing you want to do is just limit the

856
00:38:16,280 --> 00:38:19,239
Speaker 4: negatives out of this. If they aren't doing anything and

857
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:21,480
Speaker 4: they see you go into the room, it shows the

858
00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:25,120
Speaker 4: distrust and that will impact your relationship. So having a

859
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:28,360
Speaker 4: solid reason why to go in there covers you. We

860
00:38:28,400 --> 00:38:30,400
Speaker 4: have an update two days later. Thanks for all the

861
00:38:30,440 --> 00:38:33,239
Speaker 4: comments and encouragement. No, I did not set up a

862
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:36,399
Speaker 4: spycam or try to walk in on them. I chickened out,

863
00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:39,120
Speaker 4: I think because deep down I didn't.

864
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:40,359
Speaker 3: Want to catch them in the act.

865
00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:42,359
Speaker 6: Turns out I didn't need to.

866
00:38:42,960 --> 00:38:45,520
Speaker 4: I stayed quiet about it, which wasn't too hard because

867
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 4: I was really busy with school this week.

868
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 6: Anyway, last night my.

869
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:52,640
Speaker 4: Girlfriend told me we should throw a party at our apartment.

870
00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:55,360
Speaker 4: I didn't really want to, but I figured why the

871
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:58,240
Speaker 4: heck not. I could stand to get pretty wasted anyway,

872
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:00,640
Speaker 4: So last night we invite I did a ton of

873
00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:03,319
Speaker 4: people over, which is not out of the ordinary for us,

874
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 4: and my girlfriend invited her best friend. It started out

875
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:11,520
Speaker 4: as just a normal party until check got raging, wasted,

876
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:15,680
Speaker 4: and announced to everyone that he had just broken up

877
00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:19,200
Speaker 4: with his girlfriend of three years. That girlfriend was of

878
00:39:19,280 --> 00:39:22,200
Speaker 4: three years. That girlfriend was of three years, and was

879
00:39:22,239 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 4: that calm whoa, whoa. I did something sort of manipulative

880
00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:29,880
Speaker 4: that I'm not totally proud of. I told my girlfriend's

881
00:39:29,920 --> 00:39:31,719
Speaker 4: best friend, I'll call her Kim.

882
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:35,239
Speaker 6: That she should hook up with Chet. I knew that

883
00:39:35,360 --> 00:39:37,200
Speaker 6: was going back why we.

884
00:39:37,239 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 4: Had all been drinking a lot, and I sort of

885
00:39:39,080 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 4: suspected she was down for Chet anyway. She agreed enthusiastically

886
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:47,080
Speaker 4: cut to Chet sitting on our couch with Kim quite

887
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:50,319
Speaker 4: literally on top of him, making out. I pointed this

888
00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,560
Speaker 4: out to my girlfriend, telling her it would be so

889
00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:58,280
Speaker 4: great if our best friends dated each other. My girlfriend

890
00:39:59,080 --> 00:40:05,480
Speaker 4: lost it, like completely lost it. She started screaming and

891
00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:08,720
Speaker 4: pushing him off of Chet, telling her she couldn't believe

892
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:11,480
Speaker 4: both of them would do that. She ended up stopping

893
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:14,239
Speaker 4: the whole party because she made such a scene, and

894
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:18,120
Speaker 4: I just stood there and watched. When she finally snapped

895
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:21,360
Speaker 4: out of it and realized everyone was staring at her,

896
00:40:21,719 --> 00:40:24,399
Speaker 4: I thanked her for confirming what I already knew, told

897
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,440
Speaker 4: her to get the f out of my house. That

898
00:40:27,719 --> 00:40:30,799
Speaker 4: was last night. I'm still sort of in shock it

899
00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:33,359
Speaker 4: went down like that. I went to bed right after,

900
00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:36,440
Speaker 4: and I haven't talked to anyone about it yet this morning.

901
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,200
Speaker 4: I don't really know how I can look Chet in

902
00:40:39,239 --> 00:40:42,359
Speaker 4: the face after this, so I haven't left my room

903
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:45,440
Speaker 4: yet and we have another update.

904
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:49,040
Speaker 6: But wow, that.

905
00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:51,840
Speaker 3: Just got so juicy in the amount of like that

906
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:54,760
Speaker 3: was a movie and I could see it all happening.

907
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:59,960
Speaker 6: I can. That's insane, though, Wow, clever Opie.

908
00:41:00,440 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, up date two four days.

909
00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:07,160
Speaker 8: Later, you should get that. You should have hooked that

910
00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:09,280
Speaker 8: date chat.

911
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:11,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, what's wrong with that? That's been what it was

912
00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:12,759
Speaker 3: the whole What's wrong with that?

913
00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:13,640
Speaker 5: Now?

914
00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:17,040
Speaker 6: My girlfriend's really into Chet's lips, But I get it.

915
00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 6: I want Chet slip.

916
00:41:19,200 --> 00:41:20,480
Speaker 7: Who doesn't want Chet's lips?

917
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:22,319
Speaker 6: Apparently everybody, even Kim.

918
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:25,600
Speaker 4: Four days later, basically after I kicked my girlfriend out

919
00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:27,440
Speaker 4: of our party, I assumed who would all.

920
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:28,680
Speaker 6: Lay low for a few days.

921
00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:29,720
Speaker 3: I was wrong.

922
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:32,880
Speaker 4: The day after the party, my roommate I decided to

923
00:41:32,880 --> 00:41:35,799
Speaker 4: call him. Chet knocked on my door and tried to talk.

924
00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:36,640
Speaker 6: But I ignored him.

925
00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:40,239
Speaker 4: Less than an hour later, the ex girlfriend sends me

926
00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 4: a long text. At first apologizing, then explaining that her

927
00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:49,920
Speaker 4: check couldn't have been avoided. What because while I was

928
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:53,200
Speaker 4: a good boyfriend, I study and sleep too much.

929
00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:55,160
Speaker 6: She then told me she.

930
00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:57,719
Speaker 4: Would be willing to work through this if I was

931
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 4: willing to try to be better and pay more attention

932
00:42:01,239 --> 00:42:07,560
Speaker 4: to her. I didn't respond to the text that's mind blowing, but.

933
00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:11,360
Speaker 3: I mean it is, huh what literally?

934
00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:11,480
Speaker 4: What?

935
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:12,759
Speaker 6: That's insane?

936
00:42:12,840 --> 00:42:17,480
Speaker 11: Though, if I'll consider that we can stay together, but like,

937
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,120
Speaker 11: you actually need to be better, not me, who was

938
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:23,600
Speaker 11: blinking your roommate right, Like, maybe I'll still do that,

939
00:42:23,640 --> 00:42:24,880
Speaker 11: but you should pay more attentions.

940
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:28,600
Speaker 3: It was inevitable. We couldn't help that. You know, you

941
00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:31,400
Speaker 3: were just so bad at everything and we were just

942
00:42:31,440 --> 00:42:36,719
Speaker 3: so bleeping Yeah, Like, oh, I couldn't help it. Then

943
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 3: You're just you just were sleepy all the time, and

944
00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:41,919
Speaker 3: I just we were just night outs. It was bound

945
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 3: to happen, like what.

946
00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:46,120
Speaker 6: I don't even know.

947
00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:50,080
Speaker 3: You got the answers.

948
00:42:52,239 --> 00:42:53,759
Speaker 6: That night, I had a dinner with my parents.

949
00:42:53,800 --> 00:42:57,040
Speaker 4: Thought I couldn't miss that the ex knew about I

950
00:42:57,080 --> 00:42:59,280
Speaker 4: came home to find all of her stuff taken.

951
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 6: Out of my room.

952
00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:02,239
Speaker 4: I figured, okay, she got the hint and moved her

953
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:03,320
Speaker 4: stuff back to her dorm.

954
00:43:03,320 --> 00:43:04,560
Speaker 6: Oh my god, it's gonna be in chets room.

955
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:05,279
Speaker 8: In Chets room.

956
00:43:05,600 --> 00:43:05,920
Speaker 6: Wrong.

957
00:43:06,600 --> 00:43:09,480
Speaker 4: I noticed later when chet store was open, she had

958
00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:13,799
Speaker 4: actually moved her stuff into his room. I haven't seen

959
00:43:13,840 --> 00:43:15,520
Speaker 4: either of them. I think they've been out of the

960
00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:19,440
Speaker 4: apartment to avoid me. I don't even know how to feel, honestly,

961
00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:21,799
Speaker 4: the breakup is so raw, even though we haven't really

962
00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:24,960
Speaker 4: had the chance to break up. And I'm so angry

963
00:43:24,960 --> 00:43:27,600
Speaker 4: at both of them but strangely missed them at the

964
00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:28,120
Speaker 4: same time.

965
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:32,719
Speaker 8: Ohp get out of that entire place. Get out of there.

966
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:35,560
Speaker 8: I know that's your living situation, but ask someone if

967
00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:38,600
Speaker 8: you can move to a different dorm or what have you,

968
00:43:38,680 --> 00:43:40,160
Speaker 8: because get the heck out of there.

969
00:43:40,320 --> 00:43:40,719
Speaker 2: The heck.

970
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:44,280
Speaker 4: Oh, we were way too nonchalant about that whole situation

971
00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:44,799
Speaker 4: going on.

972
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:48,560
Speaker 6: That was cratty more chalant. That was crazy to move

973
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:50,359
Speaker 6: all of her stuff into Chet's room.

974
00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:54,319
Speaker 4: Like right, Like, girl, get out of the apartment at least,

975
00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:56,520
Speaker 4: like I don't care if you're gonna.

976
00:43:56,320 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 6: Be all like rude and date chests still, but like

977
00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 6: to listen in.

978
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:05,520
Speaker 3: Front of me, literally right next morn, Like right, I'm

979
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:10,160
Speaker 3: right there, I can probably hear you like, that's so nasty.

980
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:13,799
Speaker 10: Why And that's the end of this story. We're going

981
00:44:13,840 --> 00:44:14,720
Speaker 10: on to the next one.

982
00:44:15,080 --> 00:44:16,880
Speaker 2: Hey, this is Riley the New Californian.

983
00:44:16,960 --> 00:44:17,120
Speaker 3: Here.

984
00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:18,600
Speaker 7: We're going to get back to these stories.

985
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:21,279
Speaker 2: But here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

986
00:44:21,719 --> 00:44:24,960
Speaker 7: My boyfriend said I embarrassed him in a tournament, so

987
00:44:25,120 --> 00:44:28,400
Speaker 7: I left make fun of him more so. I twenty

988
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,120
Speaker 7: one female, have been dating my boyfriend, twenty male for

989
00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:34,600
Speaker 7: three years. We got accepted into the same college, and

990
00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:38,400
Speaker 7: both of us tried for our university's valerant team past

991
00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,600
Speaker 7: no so I got on the team and he didn't.

992
00:44:42,160 --> 00:44:44,640
Speaker 7: This caused a huge issue in our relationship, but I

993
00:44:44,719 --> 00:44:47,359
Speaker 7: thought we worked through it. By the way, this comes

994
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:49,840
Speaker 7: from user I hate men who game, And if you

995
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:51,440
Speaker 7: want to submit your own stories, go to the our

996
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:54,600
Speaker 7: slide Showkay storytime separate it. I'm Dakota, I'm Carly.

997
00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:56,240
Speaker 8: I'm a guy who games. My name's Keon.

998
00:44:56,480 --> 00:44:58,279
Speaker 7: Yeah, and we're here to talk about the stuff that

999
00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:00,800
Speaker 7: we know and give good advice because we know stuff.

1000
00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:03,440
Speaker 7: Sometimes we don't know stuff all the time. Sometimes we

1001
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:05,560
Speaker 7: don't know things, So let us know those things in

1002
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:09,440
Speaker 7: the comments. If you know them mysterious, stranger and dope.

1003
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:13,640
Speaker 7: He says, Well, there was a local gaming tournament for Valorant,

1004
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:17,239
Speaker 7: and my boyfriend begged me to play. The first place

1005
00:45:17,320 --> 00:45:21,160
Speaker 7: prize was twelve hundred dollars. I have been radiant before,

1006
00:45:21,520 --> 00:45:24,439
Speaker 7: the highest rank in the game, and right now I'm

1007
00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:27,920
Speaker 7: sitting just below that. My boyfriend's friends were going to

1008
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:30,279
Speaker 7: join us, and they are all a little lower rank

1009
00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:32,880
Speaker 7: than I am. We got into our bracket today and

1010
00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:36,440
Speaker 7: I carried them hard for four matches, racking up thirty

1011
00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:39,480
Speaker 7: plus unlives each game.

1012
00:45:40,320 --> 00:45:42,239
Speaker 8: Wow, sounds like me for real?

1013
00:45:42,600 --> 00:45:43,719
Speaker 7: Who for that game?

1014
00:45:43,760 --> 00:45:46,120
Speaker 6: That's like yeah good? She's like, actually, like.

1015
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:47,359
Speaker 7: Really that's the entire Yeah.

1016
00:45:48,239 --> 00:45:48,399
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1017
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:52,480
Speaker 8: Since we're saying gamer lingo, carried means like bringing the

1018
00:45:52,480 --> 00:45:54,280
Speaker 8: team to victory on your.

1019
00:45:54,239 --> 00:45:56,880
Speaker 7: Back and carry the team on your back. This is

1020
00:45:56,920 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 7: a trigger warning. This is a gamer story. Trigger warning

1021
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:03,759
Speaker 7: for gamers. This is about games.

1022
00:46:03,880 --> 00:46:06,279
Speaker 4: If a female gamer doing good is gonna trigger you,

1023
00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:06,839
Speaker 4: please leave.

1024
00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,359
Speaker 7: No, I just meant to just video games. But yeah, also,

1025
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:11,840
Speaker 7: don't get triggered by females.

1026
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:12,160
Speaker 2: Please.

1027
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:16,000
Speaker 7: We lost our fifth match and they started making passive

1028
00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:19,080
Speaker 7: aggressive comments at me, like I choked under the pressure

1029
00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:24,120
Speaker 7: in the sixth game, they began making really schmexist comments

1030
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:28,439
Speaker 7: like dang girls really don't belong in games. Huhh did

1031
00:46:28,440 --> 00:46:31,360
Speaker 7: your boyfriend carry you? Op your trash get back to

1032
00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 7: the kitchen like a good girl.

1033
00:46:34,800 --> 00:46:38,640
Speaker 6: None of y'all could get past the first five rounds. Yeah, yeah,

1034
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:41,040
Speaker 6: how did you get here?

1035
00:46:41,120 --> 00:46:41,319
Speaker 4: Then?

1036
00:46:41,680 --> 00:46:43,640
Speaker 7: I thought my boyfriend would be mad, but he was

1037
00:46:43,880 --> 00:46:47,840
Speaker 7: just laughing with them. Halfway through the game, one of

1038
00:46:47,840 --> 00:46:50,120
Speaker 7: the boys said, Jesus, remind me to never ask a

1039
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,880
Speaker 7: girl to play with us again. I'm sensitive to that

1040
00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:55,799
Speaker 7: kind of stuff and started crying. My boyfriend told me

1041
00:46:55,840 --> 00:46:59,400
Speaker 7: to stop crying, that it was just gamer banter and

1042
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:01,080
Speaker 7: that I should just play the game.

1043
00:47:01,160 --> 00:47:01,919
Speaker 3: Break with them.

1044
00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:04,759
Speaker 7: I told him he could go f himself, and stood up,

1045
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:06,400
Speaker 7: walking out of the gaming cafe.

1046
00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:08,920
Speaker 6: Good or you?

1047
00:47:10,040 --> 00:47:12,200
Speaker 7: Yeah, we don't need to date this guy. This guy sucks.

1048
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:13,240
Speaker 6: He sucks.

1049
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:16,040
Speaker 7: It's twelve am now, and my best friend just sent

1050
00:47:16,080 --> 00:47:18,520
Speaker 7: me tweets from them and their friends saying awful things

1051
00:47:18,520 --> 00:47:23,000
Speaker 7: about me and calling me unprofessional. Right, my boyfriend won't

1052
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 7: even speak to me.

1053
00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:24,880
Speaker 6: That's not your boyfriend anymore.

1054
00:47:25,040 --> 00:47:26,839
Speaker 7: Yeah, why is that the way you should just break

1055
00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:29,879
Speaker 7: up with that guy? He texted that I embarrassed him.

1056
00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:32,200
Speaker 6: You know, you should have been good enough to play.

1057
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:35,160
Speaker 7: Yeah, were already even on the team.

1058
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:37,800
Speaker 6: Bro, we're not even on the team because you couldn't

1059
00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:38,760
Speaker 6: make it on the team.

1060
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:41,440
Speaker 7: A lot of my online gaming friends are telling me

1061
00:47:41,480 --> 00:47:43,880
Speaker 7: to just apologize and own up to my fault for

1062
00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:46,920
Speaker 7: making them forfeit. My university gaming team is telling me

1063
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:49,080
Speaker 7: to break up with him, focus on their tournaments, and

1064
00:47:49,120 --> 00:47:51,439
Speaker 7: forget about him. Yeah, am I the a hole? Yeah?

1065
00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 7: If you don't break up with that guy, you're the

1066
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:53,200
Speaker 7: a hole.

1067
00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:55,279
Speaker 8: Yeah that's crazy, and also the man listen to your

1068
00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:58,200
Speaker 8: team also be like, hey, guys, I'm gonna go to

1069
00:47:58,320 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 8: the university team. We all can go play in your rooms.

1070
00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:07,120
Speaker 7: Yeah, well, we have some comments here. Vodka Beart says

1071
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 7: reading this made me sit and think for a second.

1072
00:48:10,080 --> 00:48:13,200
Speaker 7: This is like totally the effing dream of a ton

1073
00:48:13,239 --> 00:48:16,640
Speaker 7: of gamers out there. But this guy, he just fed

1074
00:48:16,640 --> 00:48:20,600
Speaker 7: it right up. I'll be hello proud of my girlfriend.

1075
00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:23,120
Speaker 7: If she was better at Valerie, I'd be bragging.

1076
00:48:23,160 --> 00:48:25,759
Speaker 8: I'm like, yeah, my girlfriend over there, Yeah, top five

1077
00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:27,560
Speaker 8: hundred in whatever.

1078
00:48:27,239 --> 00:48:29,000
Speaker 7: Game, top five hund though she's.

1079
00:48:28,880 --> 00:48:30,920
Speaker 8: Also number one in my heart.

1080
00:48:31,120 --> 00:48:34,359
Speaker 7: I'd be genuinely begging her to carry me or just

1081
00:48:34,480 --> 00:48:37,680
Speaker 7: watch her play and learn you're not the ahle whatsoever.

1082
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:42,440
Speaker 7: Also also drop that person asap and f his friends.

1083
00:48:42,840 --> 00:48:47,880
Speaker 7: I mean not literally, but like you know anyway, Op replies,

1084
00:48:48,040 --> 00:48:49,680
Speaker 7: that's what two of the guys on my team said,

1085
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:51,479
Speaker 7: that it would be a dream to have a cute,

1086
00:48:51,560 --> 00:48:54,320
Speaker 7: radiant girlfriend, and that they don't understand why he hated

1087
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:58,440
Speaker 7: that I got in so much. I've been texting them

1088
00:48:58,440 --> 00:49:00,279
Speaker 7: a lot throughout this, and I think we're going to

1089
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:02,279
Speaker 7: make a game plan for the breakup together so I

1090
00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 7: don't have to do it alone. That's hey, that's not

1091
00:49:05,080 --> 00:49:05,720
Speaker 7: how that works.

1092
00:49:05,760 --> 00:49:08,799
Speaker 6: But this is, yeah, making a breakup plan with who?

1093
00:49:09,360 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 7: With your I hope with your I think it was

1094
00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:14,919
Speaker 7: with the friend. Yeah, maybe with the teammates. For a second,

1095
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:16,040
Speaker 7: I thought you were saying you were going to make

1096
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:16,759
Speaker 7: a breakup plan with.

1097
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:19,240
Speaker 6: Your boy, I thought, But I think it's with the teammates.

1098
00:49:19,280 --> 00:49:23,200
Speaker 8: You know what you should do, Op, get your your

1099
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:28,759
Speaker 8: college team and you should have your team versus his team. No,

1100
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:32,239
Speaker 8: and then be like after you defeat them, you're you're

1101
00:49:32,280 --> 00:49:35,200
Speaker 8: gonna win, obviously because it's a college team. Be like,

1102
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:36,400
Speaker 8: I break up with you.

1103
00:49:36,440 --> 00:49:37,960
Speaker 6: No, don't ever play with these people again.

1104
00:49:38,200 --> 00:49:40,360
Speaker 4: Just don't put them He doesn't he doesn't deserve the

1105
00:49:40,440 --> 00:49:41,399
Speaker 4: chance to play with you all.

1106
00:49:41,880 --> 00:49:44,400
Speaker 7: The problem here is you play valorant, need play a

1107
00:49:44,440 --> 00:49:45,240
Speaker 7: better game.

1108
00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:47,120
Speaker 8: Like see Us Go?

1109
00:49:47,800 --> 00:49:50,240
Speaker 7: Uh not the a hole. I've been gaming for fifteen

1110
00:49:50,320 --> 00:49:53,440
Speaker 7: years and have played with all types of people, and

1111
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:55,759
Speaker 7: not once have I or the people I've chosen to

1112
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:59,320
Speaker 7: play with made comments about women. They are terrible people.

1113
00:49:59,680 --> 00:50:01,880
Speaker 7: That's just who they are, and they are showing you

1114
00:50:01,960 --> 00:50:05,040
Speaker 7: that now. Besides, I have a feeling that if you

1115
00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:06,880
Speaker 7: guys won the tournament, they would have to come up

1116
00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:09,360
Speaker 7: with a reason why you should get an uneven split

1117
00:50:09,440 --> 00:50:12,839
Speaker 7: of the prize money. I'm sure no Opie says, I

1118
00:50:12,920 --> 00:50:16,200
Speaker 7: didn't even think about this. I don't remember them talking

1119
00:50:16,239 --> 00:50:18,840
Speaker 7: about splitting it with me at all. I was always

1120
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:21,799
Speaker 7: left out of that conversation. Oh my god, Why was

1121
00:50:21,800 --> 00:50:28,319
Speaker 7: I so blind? HAA edit. Wow, I was not expecting

1122
00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:31,320
Speaker 7: this type of response. A sweet guy on my team

1123
00:50:31,360 --> 00:50:33,640
Speaker 7: said to one v one him tomorrow and if I lose,

1124
00:50:33,719 --> 00:50:37,960
Speaker 7: he gets to send the breakup text. Thanks for opening

1125
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:41,560
Speaker 7: my eyes. I really should have ended this relationship the moment.

1126
00:50:41,640 --> 00:50:43,919
Speaker 7: He wasn't happy for me when I got in, which

1127
00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:47,680
Speaker 7: is true. Yeah, thanks loves, and there is another update.

1128
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:48,480
Speaker 6: But yeah, joyful.

1129
00:50:48,600 --> 00:50:51,000
Speaker 4: I hope it's post breakup because you said bye bye

1130
00:50:51,080 --> 00:50:52,280
Speaker 4: you suck hecky.

1131
00:50:52,360 --> 00:50:54,279
Speaker 7: Yeah, dude, right where we want to be. We're in

1132
00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:57,160
Speaker 7: the sweet spot. We've got a team that supports us.

1133
00:50:57,480 --> 00:50:59,279
Speaker 7: They also want us to break up with this guy

1134
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:01,680
Speaker 7: who sucks, and we're gonna do it.

1135
00:51:02,239 --> 00:51:05,040
Speaker 8: Wow. W's are all around the w's all around team.

1136
00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:06,520
Speaker 8: Good job gg's.

1137
00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:09,320
Speaker 7: W's all around ggs.

1138
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:11,520
Speaker 8: W communicating good job.

1139
00:51:12,239 --> 00:51:14,560
Speaker 7: Update. So I broke up with them.

1140
00:51:14,640 --> 00:51:15,359
Speaker 2: Woo.

1141
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:21,520
Speaker 7: I won the one B one so we did it

1142
00:51:21,560 --> 00:51:24,719
Speaker 7: in person with my friends outside the dorm room. My

1143
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:25,960
Speaker 7: team was there to support me.

1144
00:51:26,120 --> 00:51:26,560
Speaker 6: I like that.

1145
00:51:26,560 --> 00:51:29,520
Speaker 4: That means they're probably like, like, ir against the door.

1146
00:51:29,880 --> 00:51:32,160
Speaker 7: Yeah, and then like she leaves the room and everyone's

1147
00:51:32,160 --> 00:51:37,560
Speaker 7: out there going yeah no, they like applaud They're like oooooo,

1148
00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:39,800
Speaker 7: like no, let's.

1149
00:51:39,600 --> 00:51:41,320
Speaker 8: Go point they start emoting.

1150
00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:43,120
Speaker 3: My God.

1151
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:46,160
Speaker 7: My team was there to support me, and they all

1152
00:51:46,160 --> 00:51:49,320
Speaker 7: made sure I was okay and safe. I also got

1153
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:51,960
Speaker 7: a free game cosmetic from a Riot employee, and I'm

1154
00:51:52,040 --> 00:51:53,960
Speaker 7: very happily going to be showing it off during the

1155
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:54,880
Speaker 7: tournament this weekend.

1156
00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:55,160
Speaker 8: Piece.

1157
00:51:55,600 --> 00:51:57,640
Speaker 7: Thanks for helping me. See this wasn't the type of

1158
00:51:57,640 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 7: behavior I should put up with, Oh Pisa to all

1159
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:04,640
Speaker 7: the men in my DMS, angry and upset, I finally

1160
00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:08,680
Speaker 7: have the courage to say this, F you, I'm better

1161
00:52:08,680 --> 00:52:13,239
Speaker 7: than you, so stop sending me angry, creepy messages. Ex

1162
00:52:13,280 --> 00:52:16,319
Speaker 7: boyfriend was very, very mad, but I'm the winner here.

1163
00:52:16,680 --> 00:52:18,640
Speaker 7: Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. And there

1164
00:52:18,640 --> 00:52:19,880
Speaker 7: are some final comments.

1165
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:22,560
Speaker 3: Did you you don't even like this girl?

1166
00:52:22,960 --> 00:52:23,040
Speaker 4: Ye?

1167
00:52:23,280 --> 00:52:25,040
Speaker 7: I'm mad you broke up with me because I don't

1168
00:52:25,160 --> 00:52:26,880
Speaker 7: like you and your better at valopment than me.

1169
00:52:27,640 --> 00:52:28,840
Speaker 6: You don't want to be with her anyway?

1170
00:52:29,800 --> 00:52:33,919
Speaker 7: Final comments Spelbem says, not the ahle man. I wish

1171
00:52:34,000 --> 00:52:37,319
Speaker 7: I was radiant, invalorant. In all seriousness, your boyfriend went

1172
00:52:37,360 --> 00:52:39,440
Speaker 7: too far. I'm glad you broke up with him, and

1173
00:52:39,520 --> 00:52:40,920
Speaker 7: Riot gave you a free skin.

1174
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:42,880
Speaker 8: Riot, by the way, is the developer?

1175
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:43,720
Speaker 2: Is the game?

1176
00:52:43,960 --> 00:52:45,880
Speaker 7: Is the game maker who made the game?

1177
00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 8: Yes?

1178
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:49,960
Speaker 7: Can we watch you play in the tournament? Opie says,

1179
00:52:50,080 --> 00:52:52,480
Speaker 7: I'm still deciding this as I'm a little hesitant to

1180
00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 7: have people know where I'm located. I've got a lot

1181
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:58,640
Speaker 7: of really creepy guys in my DMS, and I'm a

1182
00:52:58,719 --> 00:53:00,920
Speaker 7: little paranoid my social media. The accounts are gonna get

1183
00:53:00,920 --> 00:53:02,879
Speaker 7: found or these guys will know what town I live

1184
00:53:02,920 --> 00:53:05,640
Speaker 7: in since the tournaments are going through my college and

1185
00:53:05,719 --> 00:53:06,480
Speaker 7: gaming cafe.

1186
00:53:06,600 --> 00:53:09,480
Speaker 4: The whole point of this was like, Hey, you guys

1187
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:12,960
Speaker 4: are rude and creepy misogynistic, and everyone's immediately.

1188
00:53:12,480 --> 00:53:16,920
Speaker 6: Likediot it could be DN. Did you read the freaking

1189
00:53:17,040 --> 00:53:17,760
Speaker 6: post again?

1190
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:22,319
Speaker 7: Dude, you need to have partners. I would always for

1191
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:24,520
Speaker 7: being a radiant valuant, play on my.

1192
00:53:24,600 --> 00:53:26,839
Speaker 6: Beautiful for me where you live and I'll show up.

1193
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:29,439
Speaker 7: I will help teach you if you tell me your

1194
00:53:29,520 --> 00:53:33,600
Speaker 7: name and address. But if I decided it's say, if

1195
00:53:33,680 --> 00:53:35,880
Speaker 7: I would gladly share and I could maybe make a

1196
00:53:35,880 --> 00:53:38,919
Speaker 7: little highlight edit and blurt out the names. Blue Sun,

1197
00:53:39,000 --> 00:53:41,600
Speaker 7: Florida says, honestly, I hope you send him a link

1198
00:53:41,640 --> 00:53:44,960
Speaker 7: to this post. Op Opie says he's already seen it good.

1199
00:53:45,320 --> 00:53:47,160
Speaker 7: A friend of his sent it to him. I got

1200
00:53:47,160 --> 00:53:53,719
Speaker 7: a slew of angry text ha haha. And that's the

1201
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:57,120
Speaker 7: end of that story. You did, You did it, OPI.

1202
00:53:57,719 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 7: Now we just need to figure out how to stop

1203
00:53:59,080 --> 00:54:03,200
Speaker 7: playing Valiant and play a better game, and that's the

1204
00:54:03,280 --> 00:54:04,000
Speaker 7: end of this story.

1205
00:54:04,040 --> 00:54:05,880
Speaker 10: We're gonna go on to the next one.

1206
00:54:05,920 --> 00:54:09,520
Speaker 4: My boyfriend demanded I share all my food, but he's

1207
00:54:09,600 --> 00:54:15,480
Speaker 4: the only one benefiting more food. I thirty three female,

1208
00:54:15,520 --> 00:54:18,680
Speaker 4: want to preface that my boyfriend thirty eight male, is

1209
00:54:18,719 --> 00:54:21,920
Speaker 4: a very generous and caring person. We have lots in

1210
00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:24,439
Speaker 4: common and have lots of fun together, but there are

1211
00:54:24,480 --> 00:54:27,400
Speaker 4: some issues with food that are starting to frustrate me

1212
00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:31,319
Speaker 4: and seem a bit selfish. By the way, this comes

1213
00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 4: from professional ear sixty six eighty one and if you

1214
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:36,040
Speaker 4: want to meet your own stories, go to the our

1215
00:54:36,080 --> 00:54:37,560
Speaker 4: slash Okay storytime Stupreddit.

1216
00:54:37,600 --> 00:54:39,880
Speaker 7: I'm Carly, I'm Dakota, I'm Keon, and.

1217
00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 6: We're here to give a good advice Googli. But we

1218
00:54:41,680 --> 00:54:42,840
Speaker 6: don't have all the answers.

1219
00:54:42,920 --> 00:54:44,319
Speaker 4: We only know what we would do, so let us

1220
00:54:44,360 --> 00:54:47,399
Speaker 4: know you do in the comments, and Opie says, if

1221
00:54:47,440 --> 00:54:49,040
Speaker 4: I'm being perfectly honest.

1222
00:54:48,800 --> 00:54:50,920
Speaker 6: They're making me quite anxious.

1223
00:54:51,520 --> 00:54:54,120
Speaker 4: I do think that maybe these food habits derived from

1224
00:54:54,120 --> 00:54:57,759
Speaker 4: an underlying ed. He is quite obsessed with weight his

1225
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:01,200
Speaker 4: and others. He works in an in industry where looks matter,

1226
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:03,760
Speaker 4: and I think it's made it very hard on himself.

1227
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,840
Speaker 4: We've been dating for just over a year and we

1228
00:55:06,880 --> 00:55:10,040
Speaker 4: have been on many holidays together. On our first holiday,

1229
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:13,480
Speaker 4: we went to lots of bakeries shops that sell sweet treats.

1230
00:55:13,719 --> 00:55:17,080
Speaker 4: He would order a couple things and want to half everything,

1231
00:55:17,440 --> 00:55:20,520
Speaker 4: except for breakfast because he doesn't eat breakfast. We shared

1232
00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:23,000
Speaker 4: everything that trip, even dinners I couldn't.

1233
00:55:22,680 --> 00:55:23,360
Speaker 6: Have to myself.

1234
00:55:23,680 --> 00:55:25,200
Speaker 3: He would expect me to share.

1235
00:55:25,800 --> 00:55:28,920
Speaker 4: Instead of a sit down breakfast, I order something takeaway,

1236
00:55:28,960 --> 00:55:31,120
Speaker 4: which is not what I'd normally do on a holiday.

1237
00:55:31,440 --> 00:55:33,560
Speaker 4: But I didn't, so it wasn't weird because it would

1238
00:55:33,560 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 4: be just him watching me eat. On our last morning,

1239
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:39,920
Speaker 4: when I went to get an egg sandwich takeaway, he

1240
00:55:40,000 --> 00:55:42,799
Speaker 4: made a comment like I didn't think you'd usually eat

1241
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:47,279
Speaker 4: something like that for breakfast, which felt like a put down,

1242
00:55:47,360 --> 00:55:48,320
Speaker 4: but I brushed it off.

1243
00:55:48,560 --> 00:55:52,560
Speaker 7: Oh I'm sorry, Do you mean food that you can

1244
00:55:52,640 --> 00:55:55,040
Speaker 7: get it for a breakfast unlike somebody I know who

1245
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:55,960
Speaker 7: doesn't eat any.

1246
00:55:55,920 --> 00:55:59,800
Speaker 4: Breaky Also, an egg sandwich like the most normal breakfast

1247
00:56:00,239 --> 00:56:00,840
Speaker 4: to get.

1248
00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:05,200
Speaker 7: Yeah, just like wow, oink oink, little piggy. I didn't

1249
00:56:05,239 --> 00:56:09,320
Speaker 7: realize we had a big old number one blue ribbon

1250
00:56:09,440 --> 00:56:12,960
Speaker 7: farm animal with us. This week apparently.

1251
00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:16,400
Speaker 4: So Ever, since then, a standard has been set that

1252
00:56:16,440 --> 00:56:20,280
Speaker 4: we just share everything when we're together, all the snacks

1253
00:56:20,320 --> 00:56:22,759
Speaker 4: and meals. I've tried to push back on it, but

1254
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:26,320
Speaker 4: he's gotten upset, implying that it's selfish that I wouldn't share.

1255
00:56:26,520 --> 00:56:29,440
Speaker 7: No, stupid, it's selfish that you want to take everything

1256
00:56:29,440 --> 00:56:31,520
Speaker 7: that your girlfriend buys for herself to eat.

1257
00:56:31,719 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 6: Right, even a small chocolate bar, we have to put

1258
00:56:34,520 --> 00:56:35,000
Speaker 6: in half.

1259
00:56:35,400 --> 00:56:37,960
Speaker 4: There have been many, many times that he has eaten

1260
00:56:38,040 --> 00:56:40,840
Speaker 4: more of what we've been sharing. He eats at a

1261
00:56:40,920 --> 00:56:43,920
Speaker 4: very fast speed and I'm a slow eater, so naturally

1262
00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:47,120
Speaker 4: he ends up eating most of it. It started to

1263
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:51,239
Speaker 4: completely take the enjoyment out of the eating experience, as

1264
00:56:51,280 --> 00:56:53,680
Speaker 4: I feel like I have to speed eat to make

1265
00:56:53,719 --> 00:56:55,280
Speaker 4: sure I have a semi fair amount.

1266
00:56:55,440 --> 00:56:56,200
Speaker 8: This is crazy.

1267
00:56:56,680 --> 00:56:58,879
Speaker 4: Yeah, I also feel full from half of the food

1268
00:56:58,880 --> 00:57:02,160
Speaker 4: it takes him to get. When splitting something small like

1269
00:57:02,239 --> 00:57:05,400
Speaker 4: a cookie or brownie, he always expects to have the

1270
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:06,200
Speaker 4: bigger half.

1271
00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:08,480
Speaker 7: Yeah. This is definitely coming from a place of like,

1272
00:57:08,840 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 7: I mean to make sure my girlfriend is thin and

1273
00:57:11,120 --> 00:57:12,280
Speaker 7: skin tea.

1274
00:57:12,760 --> 00:57:15,480
Speaker 4: Sometimes I just want something to myself, and I feel

1275
00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:17,880
Speaker 4: scared that if I say I want something to myself,

1276
00:57:17,960 --> 00:57:19,040
Speaker 4: he's gonna get upset.

1277
00:57:19,160 --> 00:57:20,280
Speaker 8: Good let him get upset.

1278
00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:23,800
Speaker 7: How are we just living in fear of our boyfriend

1279
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:27,040
Speaker 7: getting mad about our food being ours?

1280
00:57:27,160 --> 00:57:27,800
Speaker 8: This is crazy.

1281
00:57:27,840 --> 00:57:30,960
Speaker 4: Stop it so now I just would prefer to not

1282
00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:34,240
Speaker 4: share anything and be able to enjoy my food slowly

1283
00:57:34,440 --> 00:57:37,840
Speaker 4: without the stress of him eating into my portion or

1284
00:57:37,840 --> 00:57:40,840
Speaker 4: wanting a bite of anything that I have. One time

1285
00:57:40,920 --> 00:57:43,400
Speaker 4: on holiday, I bought a cookie with a coconut on it,

1286
00:57:43,720 --> 00:57:46,640
Speaker 4: which he doesn't like but I do, and another item.

1287
00:57:47,040 --> 00:57:51,360
Speaker 4: He went on for fifteen minutes about how he couldn't

1288
00:57:51,360 --> 00:57:53,640
Speaker 4: believe I'd gone and bought something that we couldn't share,

1289
00:57:54,360 --> 00:57:56,720
Speaker 4: implying that I was selfish for doing so.

1290
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:59,120
Speaker 7: God, I want to push this guy down a hill.

1291
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:02,280
Speaker 4: I told him that I like coconut and I bought

1292
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:05,240
Speaker 4: it because I wanted to try it, but he still

1293
00:58:05,240 --> 00:58:09,040
Speaker 4: thought I was unreasonable for buying something for myself that

1294
00:58:09,280 --> 00:58:12,760
Speaker 4: I wanted. On our last holiday, we had a fight

1295
00:58:12,840 --> 00:58:15,360
Speaker 4: because I wanted to have a sit down breakfast for

1296
00:58:15,400 --> 00:58:18,320
Speaker 4: the first time. He tried to talk me out of

1297
00:58:18,360 --> 00:58:20,720
Speaker 4: it by saying we don't have time and asked if

1298
00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:22,160
Speaker 4: I could just get something takeaway.

1299
00:58:22,720 --> 00:58:24,400
Speaker 6: I put my foot down, I said that I.

1300
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:26,600
Speaker 4: Haven't had to sit down breakfast on any of the

1301
00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:29,200
Speaker 4: trips we've been on, and it made things really tense.

1302
00:58:29,760 --> 00:58:32,280
Speaker 6: I felt so guilty and selfish.

1303
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:34,040
Speaker 4: For wanting to do that, but I knew I needed

1304
00:58:34,040 --> 00:58:36,640
Speaker 4: to or i'd resent him for always getting his way.

1305
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:39,760
Speaker 4: Now I'm nervous as we haven't seen each other in

1306
00:58:39,800 --> 00:58:41,840
Speaker 4: a while and are about to go on a four

1307
00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:42,840
Speaker 4: week trip together.

1308
00:58:43,040 --> 00:58:44,280
Speaker 3: Oh you not see him in a while?

1309
00:58:44,800 --> 00:58:48,960
Speaker 7: Oh, Hevenan, we're really at I wanted to eat breakfast

1310
00:58:48,960 --> 00:58:53,600
Speaker 7: somewhere and that has really put a load of tension

1311
00:58:53,640 --> 00:58:57,919
Speaker 7: into our relationship. Shut up, break up with this guy.

1312
00:58:58,120 --> 00:59:00,960
Speaker 7: I'm sorry. I don't think I have a lot of

1313
00:59:01,000 --> 00:59:04,640
Speaker 7: sympathy for you, because this is absolutely freaking absurd. Why

1314
00:59:04,640 --> 00:59:09,720
Speaker 7: are we with this guy if we're afraid of literally

1315
00:59:09,760 --> 00:59:11,400
Speaker 7: telling him to eat his own food?

1316
00:59:12,000 --> 00:59:14,760
Speaker 6: So get upset the weirdo baby boy.

1317
00:59:15,120 --> 00:59:15,760
Speaker 7: My god.

1318
00:59:16,160 --> 00:59:18,400
Speaker 4: I brought up the breakfast thing because of what happened

1319
00:59:18,400 --> 00:59:21,320
Speaker 4: on our last trip. I said, when we're in cities,

1320
00:59:21,520 --> 00:59:24,480
Speaker 4: i'd like to buy a sit down breakfast, as that's

1321
00:59:24,520 --> 00:59:27,120
Speaker 4: a nice experience for me and I'm really looking forward

1322
00:59:27,160 --> 00:59:29,920
Speaker 4: to it. But part of the trip we are camping

1323
00:59:30,040 --> 00:59:33,160
Speaker 4: and obviously I can make something on those days. He's

1324
00:59:33,200 --> 00:59:35,440
Speaker 4: made it well known that he thinks getting us sit

1325
00:59:35,520 --> 00:59:37,880
Speaker 4: down breakfast is going to eat into our time for

1326
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:41,680
Speaker 4: sight seeing, which it really won't, but he has agreed

1327
00:59:41,720 --> 00:59:45,560
Speaker 4: if it's only in these particular places. I'm nervous once

1328
00:59:45,600 --> 00:59:47,760
Speaker 4: I get there he's gonna try and pressure me out

1329
00:59:47,760 --> 00:59:49,760
Speaker 4: of our agreement and say we don't have time to

1330
00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:52,920
Speaker 4: do that. We even hinted the other day after we

1331
00:59:53,080 --> 00:59:55,480
Speaker 4: made the agreement that maybe I could make something in

1332
00:59:55,520 --> 00:59:57,280
Speaker 4: our accommodation for breakfast.

1333
00:59:57,600 --> 01:00:01,120
Speaker 7: Dude, what does this guy think you're eating of seventeen

1334
01:00:01,240 --> 01:00:02,240
Speaker 7: course breakfast?

1335
01:00:02,520 --> 01:00:02,840
Speaker 6: Right?

1336
01:00:03,320 --> 01:00:05,840
Speaker 7: We're not gonna have enough time to have our trip

1337
01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:11,600
Speaker 7: that's four weeks long. See what this guy sucks? Don't

1338
01:00:11,640 --> 01:00:13,240
Speaker 7: go on a month long trip with him?

1339
01:00:13,760 --> 01:00:15,760
Speaker 4: So am I the a hole for putting my foot

1340
01:00:15,760 --> 01:00:18,080
Speaker 4: down and not backing down on me wanting to have

1341
01:00:18,160 --> 01:00:21,240
Speaker 4: a sit down breakfast on holiday even if he doesn't,

1342
01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:24,480
Speaker 4: and making a blanket roll from now on that I

1343
01:00:24,600 --> 01:00:28,000
Speaker 4: do not want to share any food with him going forward.

1344
01:00:28,760 --> 01:00:29,960
Speaker 7: No, you wouldn't be the ahole.

1345
01:00:30,240 --> 01:00:31,360
Speaker 6: I think you need to do that.

1346
01:00:31,640 --> 01:00:34,640
Speaker 7: Yeah, and if he literally responds in any way other

1347
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:37,760
Speaker 7: than okay, yes, my glorious, beautiful queen, we will do this.

1348
01:00:38,120 --> 01:00:42,320
Speaker 7: Then you need to break up with him immediately because

1349
01:00:42,440 --> 01:00:45,760
Speaker 7: this level of entitlement and like you're afraid of him

1350
01:00:46,120 --> 01:00:48,760
Speaker 7: being upset, he's weaponizing his emotions against you.

1351
01:00:48,880 --> 01:00:50,640
Speaker 4: You know what I want to know if they split

1352
01:00:50,680 --> 01:00:53,120
Speaker 4: a meal and she up front was like, and can

1353
01:00:53,160 --> 01:00:56,800
Speaker 4: you put it like evenly on two plates, what he'd do? Like,

1354
01:00:56,840 --> 01:00:58,880
Speaker 4: would he start just like reaching over to half of

1355
01:00:58,920 --> 01:00:59,360
Speaker 4: your plate?

1356
01:00:59,440 --> 01:01:03,520
Speaker 7: Probably probably just have a This guy's.

1357
01:01:04,840 --> 01:01:08,400
Speaker 8: This guy's relationship with OPI is wait, it's like OP

1358
01:01:08,560 --> 01:01:11,960
Speaker 8: and food. He's I don't he needs to talk to

1359
01:01:12,040 --> 01:01:14,840
Speaker 8: somebody if he can't really see what's going on here.

1360
01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:17,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, well it was suspected that he might have an

1361
01:01:17,240 --> 01:01:24,560
Speaker 4: d SOMM but it's yeah, I don't know comments coming one.

1362
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:28,080
Speaker 4: This is a bizarre dynamic and not okay at all.

1363
01:01:28,240 --> 01:01:30,800
Speaker 4: You need to have your own food. He's starving you

1364
01:01:30,840 --> 01:01:34,360
Speaker 4: on purpose. He's not accidentally taking more of the shared food.

1365
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:37,400
Speaker 4: Dude needs therapy, but even if he got it, I

1366
01:01:37,400 --> 01:01:41,400
Speaker 4: wouldn't personally trust him at all. Don't take this bs anymore.

1367
01:01:41,640 --> 01:01:44,160
Speaker 4: Not the a hole comment who says, why are you

1368
01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:47,320
Speaker 4: with this guy? You are nervous anxious. You're afraid to

1369
01:01:47,400 --> 01:01:51,280
Speaker 4: tell him he's obsessive about food looks and wait, and

1370
01:01:51,520 --> 01:01:55,320
Speaker 4: you have spent a year conforming to his behavior standards.

1371
01:01:55,760 --> 01:01:58,040
Speaker 4: I can't square any of this with him being a

1372
01:01:58,240 --> 01:02:01,960
Speaker 4: very caring person. Ye back and read what you wrote,

1373
01:02:02,160 --> 01:02:05,120
Speaker 4: because you have described a year of being controlled by

1374
01:02:05,160 --> 01:02:05,600
Speaker 4: this guy.

1375
01:02:06,360 --> 01:02:07,320
Speaker 6: Are you the a hole?

1376
01:02:07,600 --> 01:02:10,200
Speaker 4: Yes for staying with him. Trust your gut that is

1377
01:02:10,200 --> 01:02:13,680
Speaker 4: making you a nervous wreck and run. Comment three he says,

1378
01:02:13,720 --> 01:02:16,960
Speaker 4: this not the a hole and end this before you

1379
01:02:17,000 --> 01:02:19,160
Speaker 4: are merely his shadow or reflection.

1380
01:02:19,960 --> 01:02:20,480
Speaker 6: Opie says.

1381
01:02:20,520 --> 01:02:22,960
Speaker 4: One of his friends told me his girlfriends have always

1382
01:02:23,040 --> 01:02:27,120
Speaker 4: been an accessory to his life, and we what what?

1383
01:02:27,400 --> 01:02:28,120
Speaker 7: Just a nice one?

1384
01:02:28,120 --> 01:02:29,960
Speaker 6: One of his friends said that, and we were just

1385
01:02:30,000 --> 01:02:30,600
Speaker 6: like ti.

1386
01:02:32,120 --> 01:02:32,840
Speaker 8: Accessories.

1387
01:02:32,960 --> 01:02:35,640
Speaker 4: They usually don't have much of one, and they just

1388
01:02:35,720 --> 01:02:38,760
Speaker 4: tag along with what he does. Comment for says, if

1389
01:02:38,760 --> 01:02:42,560
Speaker 4: it's a demand with pressure attached, it's not sharing. Sharing

1390
01:02:42,640 --> 01:02:46,280
Speaker 4: is something you do voluntarily. He's taking He is taking

1391
01:02:46,320 --> 01:02:49,040
Speaker 4: your ability to enjoy food. He is taking your literal

1392
01:02:49,080 --> 01:02:51,920
Speaker 4: food off your plate, and he's taking your ability to

1393
01:02:51,960 --> 01:02:55,160
Speaker 4: sit down and eat a whole freaking meal. He's also

1394
01:02:55,280 --> 01:02:59,600
Speaker 4: using you as his enabler because that way he doesn't

1395
01:02:59,600 --> 01:03:01,720
Speaker 4: have to admit that he just wants to eat something.

1396
01:03:02,280 --> 01:03:04,720
Speaker 4: It's just that he's taking some of your food, not

1397
01:03:04,800 --> 01:03:08,480
Speaker 4: that he's getting some for himself. He definitely has issues

1398
01:03:08,520 --> 01:03:10,880
Speaker 4: around food. If you want to help him, stop it.

1399
01:03:11,000 --> 01:03:13,360
Speaker 4: He needs to get help. But he needs to do

1400
01:03:13,400 --> 01:03:16,680
Speaker 4: that for himself because he's an adult and you can't

1401
01:03:16,720 --> 01:03:19,280
Speaker 4: do it for him. But what you can do is

1402
01:03:19,320 --> 01:03:22,520
Speaker 4: stop letting him take your food and make him actually

1403
01:03:22,560 --> 01:03:25,440
Speaker 4: admit that he is eating and putting food into his body.

1404
01:03:25,840 --> 01:03:28,800
Speaker 6: That is his food, as opposed to but it doesn't

1405
01:03:28,880 --> 01:03:31,560
Speaker 6: count because it's just some of yours. There is no

1406
01:03:31,680 --> 01:03:34,920
Speaker 6: such thing as a bigger half. There is, however, smaller

1407
01:03:34,920 --> 01:03:37,920
Speaker 6: and larger portions, and he gets the larger portion. He

1408
01:03:38,040 --> 01:03:40,440
Speaker 6: is the selfish one. I don't like this man.

1409
01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:43,960
Speaker 7: I don't like this man. Break up with this food.

1410
01:03:44,560 --> 01:03:46,800
Speaker 4: If I never got a full meal for a whole year,

1411
01:03:47,320 --> 01:03:48,959
Speaker 4: I'd be losing my mind one.

1412
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:51,280
Speaker 6: I'd be so hungry.

1413
01:03:51,640 --> 01:03:56,520
Speaker 7: Sar cannot fathom allowing this to go on for a year.

1414
01:03:56,920 --> 01:03:57,800
Speaker 7: I can't even fat.

1415
01:03:57,840 --> 01:04:01,600
Speaker 8: That's crazy too, Like the fact that he doesn't take

1416
01:04:01,640 --> 01:04:05,920
Speaker 8: into consideration of his partner's diet or like food, and

1417
01:04:06,120 --> 01:04:10,280
Speaker 8: like you Opie's food is crazy. He just sees you

1418
01:04:10,320 --> 01:04:13,800
Speaker 8: as like, all right, that's my meal ticket, the bell rung,

1419
01:04:14,360 --> 01:04:17,439
Speaker 8: that's food time. Oh, op he's eating food time.

1420
01:04:18,120 --> 01:04:20,600
Speaker 7: And then to just where it's not like a cute

1421
01:04:20,600 --> 01:04:22,240
Speaker 7: thing you guys just do and you're like, I'm kind

1422
01:04:22,240 --> 01:04:24,040
Speaker 7: of over it. It's always just been a thing where

1423
01:04:24,040 --> 01:04:26,040
Speaker 7: it's like, yeah, I don't know. I tried not to

1424
01:04:26,080 --> 01:04:28,200
Speaker 7: and he said that I was a horrible selfish monster

1425
01:04:28,360 --> 01:04:31,160
Speaker 7: and that like like no one loves me or whatever.

1426
01:04:32,000 --> 01:04:33,240
Speaker 7: So I don't know. I just let him do it

1427
01:04:33,280 --> 01:04:36,280
Speaker 7: because I don't want him to get upset. No, what

1428
01:04:36,320 --> 01:04:37,000
Speaker 7: are we doing?

1429
01:04:37,600 --> 01:04:37,760
Speaker 1: Edit.

1430
01:04:37,800 --> 01:04:40,200
Speaker 4: Where I think the eating stuff comes in is that

1431
01:04:40,240 --> 01:04:42,760
Speaker 4: he is always trying to control how much he eats,

1432
01:04:43,080 --> 01:04:45,880
Speaker 4: which I think he struggles with. He loves to eat

1433
01:04:45,880 --> 01:04:49,240
Speaker 4: and finds it hard to control himself. Sometimes it seems

1434
01:04:49,280 --> 01:04:52,440
Speaker 4: as though when I get something for myself, he gets

1435
01:04:52,480 --> 01:04:55,360
Speaker 4: food envy and wants to eat something too, so he

1436
01:04:55,440 --> 01:04:57,919
Speaker 4: tries to control my eating so that he doesn't eat

1437
01:04:58,000 --> 01:05:01,120
Speaker 4: more often or as often as me. I think the

1438
01:05:01,160 --> 01:05:03,760
Speaker 4: breakfast thing is that if we sit down, he'll feel

1439
01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:06,320
Speaker 4: as though he will want to eat two, so he'd

1440
01:05:06,400 --> 01:05:08,000
Speaker 4: rather avoid it if.

1441
01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:09,760
Speaker 6: I want a snack while we're out.

1442
01:05:09,840 --> 01:05:12,919
Speaker 4: He'll sometimes try to convince me not to buy one

1443
01:05:13,360 --> 01:05:15,000
Speaker 4: because then he'll want a snack.

1444
01:05:15,160 --> 01:05:15,400
Speaker 6: Two.

1445
01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:19,000
Speaker 7: Wow, we really need to end that story with you

1446
01:05:19,160 --> 01:05:20,640
Speaker 7: breaking up forever.

1447
01:05:21,360 --> 01:05:23,920
Speaker 4: You're going to get a large or you can eat

1448
01:05:23,960 --> 01:05:25,160
Speaker 4: meal by yourself.

1449
01:05:25,520 --> 01:05:28,000
Speaker 7: Yeah, and that's the end of this story. We're gonna

1450
01:05:28,040 --> 01:05:30,600
Speaker 7: go on to the next one. Hey, it's Dakota, your

1451
01:05:30,600 --> 01:05:33,160
Speaker 7: favorite rat brain host here, and we're gonna get back

1452
01:05:33,160 --> 01:05:35,640
Speaker 7: to the stories soon. But here's three minutes of ads

1453
01:05:35,640 --> 01:05:39,560
Speaker 7: from our sponsors. My mother took my child and I

1454
01:05:39,600 --> 01:05:41,600
Speaker 7: don't know if she's better off with them.

1455
01:05:42,040 --> 01:05:43,680
Speaker 3: Well, I don't know either.

1456
01:05:43,920 --> 01:05:46,120
Speaker 7: Well let's find out. There's a trigger warning here for

1457
01:05:46,160 --> 01:05:49,520
Speaker 7: the Devil's lettuce I thirty seven female have been fighting

1458
01:05:49,560 --> 01:05:54,280
Speaker 7: for custody of my daughter thirteen for the last eleven years.

1459
01:05:54,760 --> 01:05:56,960
Speaker 7: I know that sounds bad on paper, but please hear

1460
01:05:57,000 --> 01:05:59,760
Speaker 7: me out. When my daughter was about two, my mother

1461
01:06:00,040 --> 01:06:02,560
Speaker 7: aiined custody of her during a very rough time in

1462
01:06:02,560 --> 01:06:06,640
Speaker 7: my life. People like to say I had a substance problem,

1463
01:06:06,920 --> 01:06:09,840
Speaker 7: but the truth is it was just the devil's let us.

1464
01:06:10,200 --> 01:06:13,200
Speaker 7: I have never been ashamed of that. By the way,

1465
01:06:13,280 --> 01:06:16,800
Speaker 7: this comes from users snow Squirrels seventy seven ninety five,

1466
01:06:16,880 --> 01:06:18,240
Speaker 7: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

1467
01:06:18,280 --> 01:06:20,880
Speaker 7: to the r slash Okay storytime subpret it. I'm Dakota

1468
01:06:21,080 --> 01:06:23,880
Speaker 7: and I'm Savannah, and we're here to give good advice. Goofily,

1469
01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:25,680
Speaker 7: But we don't have all the answers. We only know

1470
01:06:25,720 --> 01:06:27,240
Speaker 7: what we know. So let us know what you know

1471
01:06:27,360 --> 01:06:32,680
Speaker 7: down in the comments. Okay and op says, my daughter's

1472
01:06:32,760 --> 01:06:36,320
Speaker 7: father is not involved. When I was pregnant, he had

1473
01:06:36,360 --> 01:06:39,800
Speaker 7: a schizophrenic episode that left me stranded far from home.

1474
01:06:40,320 --> 01:06:44,040
Speaker 7: Since then, it has basically been me trying to rebuild

1475
01:06:44,040 --> 01:06:46,960
Speaker 7: my life and stay connected to my child while my

1476
01:06:47,000 --> 01:06:50,840
Speaker 7: mother does everything she can to keep control. Fast forward

1477
01:06:50,880 --> 01:06:53,880
Speaker 7: to now. I've spent years trying to show the court

1478
01:06:54,000 --> 01:06:57,240
Speaker 7: that I have turned my life around. I've had stable housing,

1479
01:06:57,440 --> 01:07:01,120
Speaker 7: no criminal record, I don't drink or you anything more

1480
01:07:01,200 --> 01:07:04,360
Speaker 7: than the devil's lettuce, and I have done everything asked

1481
01:07:04,360 --> 01:07:07,840
Speaker 7: of me. Despite that, my mother continues to act like

1482
01:07:07,960 --> 01:07:11,520
Speaker 7: I am a danger or unfit. She is a self absorbed,

1483
01:07:11,640 --> 01:07:14,960
Speaker 7: controlling person and thrives on keeping me at a distance.

1484
01:07:15,400 --> 01:07:18,680
Speaker 7: The reason I'm posting this is because of what happened yesterday.

1485
01:07:18,800 --> 01:07:22,200
Speaker 7: November one, out of nowhere, my stepfather texted me a

1486
01:07:22,240 --> 01:07:25,800
Speaker 7: picture of my daughter at a renaissance fair, saying, twenty

1487
01:07:25,880 --> 01:07:28,760
Speaker 7: years ago I brought you, and followed it with several

1488
01:07:28,760 --> 01:07:32,560
Speaker 7: more photos of my daughter looking happy. I replied politely,

1489
01:07:33,040 --> 01:07:34,960
Speaker 7: saying I hope she was having fun and that I

1490
01:07:35,000 --> 01:07:38,760
Speaker 7: missed her. He kept sending photos and I did not

1491
01:07:38,960 --> 01:07:42,280
Speaker 7: know what else to say, so I just hearted the messages.

1492
01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:46,600
Speaker 7: It broke me. I have not seen her in five years,

1493
01:07:46,840 --> 01:07:50,240
Speaker 7: except for one awkward dinner last month that my mother arranged.

1494
01:07:50,680 --> 01:07:54,520
Speaker 7: That dinner was awful. My mom's, stepdad, and sister all

1495
01:07:54,560 --> 01:07:57,280
Speaker 7: took turns bragging about the trips and vacations they had

1496
01:07:57,280 --> 01:08:00,960
Speaker 7: taken my daughter on things I never even knew. I

1497
01:08:01,000 --> 01:08:03,160
Speaker 7: tried to stay calm and focus on my daughter, but

1498
01:08:03,200 --> 01:08:06,160
Speaker 7: I could feel how performative it all was. My mom

1499
01:08:06,280 --> 01:08:08,720
Speaker 7: even said, whether you believe it or not, we never

1500
01:08:08,760 --> 01:08:12,080
Speaker 7: wanted you out of her life. I told her, honestly,

1501
01:08:12,160 --> 01:08:13,920
Speaker 7: I have a hard time believing that, based on my

1502
01:08:13,960 --> 01:08:18,080
Speaker 7: own childhood. That ended the night. For background, I lost

1503
01:08:18,080 --> 01:08:21,479
Speaker 7: my fiance two years ago to the VID pneumonia. He

1504
01:08:21,760 --> 01:08:25,880
Speaker 7: was my biggest support during this custody battle and after

1505
01:08:25,920 --> 01:08:29,759
Speaker 7: he passed away. I lost nearly everything. My home, my hope,

1506
01:08:29,920 --> 01:08:33,600
Speaker 7: my sense of stability were gone. My mother refused to

1507
01:08:33,680 --> 01:08:36,040
Speaker 7: help when I asked, even though I just wanted to

1508
01:08:36,040 --> 01:08:39,000
Speaker 7: be near my daughter. Since then, she and my stepfather

1509
01:08:39,040 --> 01:08:41,680
Speaker 7: have visited states I lived in without ever telling me

1510
01:08:41,720 --> 01:08:45,240
Speaker 7: they were nearby. It's like they enjoy reminding me of

1511
01:08:45,280 --> 01:08:48,360
Speaker 7: what I cannot have. I recently moved back to Texas

1512
01:08:48,360 --> 01:08:50,519
Speaker 7: to be closer to my daughter, hoping it would help,

1513
01:08:50,840 --> 01:08:54,760
Speaker 7: but every interaction just hurts worse. They gate keep her

1514
01:08:54,840 --> 01:08:57,600
Speaker 7: life from me, send me photos like I'm an outsider,

1515
01:08:57,640 --> 01:09:00,360
Speaker 7: and act like I should be grateful for crumbs. I

1516
01:09:00,360 --> 01:09:03,040
Speaker 7: do not want to cause my daughter more confusion or

1517
01:09:03,080 --> 01:09:06,160
Speaker 7: emotional damage, but I also cannot keep breaking my own

1518
01:09:06,200 --> 01:09:08,920
Speaker 7: heart over and over trying to be included when it's

1519
01:09:08,920 --> 01:09:11,800
Speaker 7: clear I'm not wanted. So would I be the a

1520
01:09:11,920 --> 01:09:14,559
Speaker 7: hole if I just stop trying all together and stepped

1521
01:09:14,560 --> 01:09:16,800
Speaker 7: out of her life. I love her deeply, but I

1522
01:09:16,840 --> 01:09:19,720
Speaker 7: feel like my presence or attempts at one only make

1523
01:09:19,800 --> 01:09:22,240
Speaker 7: things worse for both of us. I do not want

1524
01:09:22,240 --> 01:09:24,479
Speaker 7: to give up on her, but I'm tired of fighting

1525
01:09:24,479 --> 01:09:27,599
Speaker 7: a battle that feels impossible to win. I've tried to grow,

1526
01:09:27,640 --> 01:09:29,759
Speaker 7: to heal, and to show that I'm not the person

1527
01:09:29,800 --> 01:09:32,920
Speaker 7: my mother made everyone believe I was. I love my

1528
01:09:33,040 --> 01:09:35,160
Speaker 7: daughter more than anything, but every time I reach out,

1529
01:09:35,240 --> 01:09:37,800
Speaker 7: I'm reminded of how much control my mother still has

1530
01:09:38,200 --> 01:09:41,000
Speaker 7: and how much it costs me just to try. I

1531
01:09:41,000 --> 01:09:42,920
Speaker 7: guess I'm just wondering if it makes me a bad

1532
01:09:42,960 --> 01:09:45,439
Speaker 7: person to finally let go and to stop trying for

1533
01:09:45,520 --> 01:09:48,120
Speaker 7: my own peace. I do not want to disappear from

1534
01:09:48,120 --> 01:09:50,160
Speaker 7: her life, but maybe the kindest thing I can do

1535
01:09:50,240 --> 01:09:52,559
Speaker 7: for both of us is to stop forcing myself into

1536
01:09:52,640 --> 01:09:55,160
Speaker 7: a space that keeps breaking me. There is an edit,

1537
01:09:55,760 --> 01:09:57,800
Speaker 7: but if I had to say anything, I would say

1538
01:09:58,160 --> 01:10:02,480
Speaker 7: you need to first try to like create a dialogue

1539
01:10:02,520 --> 01:10:05,760
Speaker 7: with your parents, because it feels like that's never really

1540
01:10:05,760 --> 01:10:09,400
Speaker 7: been done, whether it's because of their behavior or not,

1541
01:10:10,160 --> 01:10:12,320
Speaker 7: but like you need to sit down and get really

1542
01:10:12,320 --> 01:10:15,280
Speaker 7: clear with them about like what you want, what your

1543
01:10:15,280 --> 01:10:19,280
Speaker 7: goals are, how everything is making you feel, and like

1544
01:10:20,120 --> 01:10:24,320
Speaker 7: just getting like a roadmap or something with like clear

1545
01:10:24,400 --> 01:10:27,360
Speaker 7: goals and goalposts so they can't just like move it.

1546
01:10:27,920 --> 01:10:29,800
Speaker 7: It's like, what do I need to be included in

1547
01:10:29,840 --> 01:10:32,640
Speaker 7: my daughter's life? Like where can I start this is

1548
01:10:32,640 --> 01:10:35,040
Speaker 7: how I'm feeling. Get it all out there before you

1549
01:10:35,160 --> 01:10:37,720
Speaker 7: just like entirely let go of it.

1550
01:10:38,200 --> 01:10:41,479
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like there's I feel like what they

1551
01:10:41,600 --> 01:10:45,360
Speaker 3: want you to do is to just stop all contact

1552
01:10:45,600 --> 01:10:48,080
Speaker 3: kind of and just like, you know, be done with it,

1553
01:10:48,120 --> 01:10:51,240
Speaker 3: because they obviously have no intention on letting her like

1554
01:10:51,600 --> 01:10:57,320
Speaker 3: in your life, which sucks. But also I think that

1555
01:10:58,280 --> 01:11:01,280
Speaker 3: you have the choice whether or not you want to

1556
01:11:01,320 --> 01:11:03,760
Speaker 3: be a part of her life. And if you still

1557
01:11:03,800 --> 01:11:05,720
Speaker 3: believe that there is like a glimmer of hope that

1558
01:11:05,760 --> 01:11:08,599
Speaker 3: you can like fix this and somehow be like more

1559
01:11:08,680 --> 01:11:11,160
Speaker 3: active in her life or something, then yes, like please

1560
01:11:11,760 --> 01:11:15,160
Speaker 3: please try and do that for your sake and for

1561
01:11:15,240 --> 01:11:17,400
Speaker 3: also you know, your daughter's sake and your family's sake.

1562
01:11:17,960 --> 01:11:21,960
Speaker 3: But if it is going to cause you mental turmoil,

1563
01:11:22,640 --> 01:11:26,120
Speaker 3: then maybe it is best to just you know, like

1564
01:11:26,200 --> 01:11:30,439
Speaker 3: I can, I can see both sides, so I don't

1565
01:11:31,000 --> 01:11:33,599
Speaker 3: I don't know exactly what the right decision would be.

1566
01:11:33,680 --> 01:11:36,200
Speaker 3: It would just it would have to be up to you, hope,

1567
01:11:36,240 --> 01:11:39,320
Speaker 3: to decide, like should I be done with this and

1568
01:11:39,360 --> 01:11:42,720
Speaker 3: move on. I'm sure like when she's older, she will

1569
01:11:42,760 --> 01:11:45,639
Speaker 3: definitely come back, but I don't know how much damage

1570
01:11:45,680 --> 01:11:46,519
Speaker 3: will be done.

1571
01:11:46,640 --> 01:11:49,240
Speaker 7: Yeah, it just feels like we need It feels like

1572
01:11:49,280 --> 01:11:52,519
Speaker 7: we need to develop our coping skills with your parents,

1573
01:11:52,920 --> 01:11:55,000
Speaker 7: or you need to develop more coping skills with your

1574
01:11:55,040 --> 01:11:55,639
Speaker 7: parents so.

1575
01:11:55,560 --> 01:11:56,160
Speaker 2: That they can't.

1576
01:11:56,720 --> 01:11:58,960
Speaker 7: You know. It sounds like you had that dinner and

1577
01:11:59,000 --> 01:12:01,519
Speaker 7: it was awful because they said something and then you

1578
01:12:01,560 --> 01:12:04,719
Speaker 7: said something back and it ruined and ended the evening.

1579
01:12:05,360 --> 01:12:07,760
Speaker 7: So that's like, you know, we just need to cope

1580
01:12:07,800 --> 01:12:11,800
Speaker 7: better with them, you know. Anyway, But there's an edit

1581
01:12:12,439 --> 01:12:15,120
Speaker 7: edit for clarity. I want to explain something important because

1582
01:12:15,160 --> 01:12:18,600
Speaker 7: many assumptions have been made about why I lost custody.

1583
01:12:19,080 --> 01:12:22,160
Speaker 7: It was not because I was using anything. When this

1584
01:12:22,200 --> 01:12:24,680
Speaker 7: all happened, I was twenty five and living with my

1585
01:12:24,720 --> 01:12:28,080
Speaker 7: mother temporarily so I could get on my feet. During

1586
01:12:28,120 --> 01:12:31,200
Speaker 7: the entire two years I lived there, I was completely clean,

1587
01:12:31,760 --> 01:12:34,000
Speaker 7: I worked, took care of my daughter, and stayed out

1588
01:12:34,040 --> 01:12:37,280
Speaker 7: of trouble. My mother was extremely controlling and would pick

1589
01:12:37,320 --> 01:12:40,760
Speaker 7: fights over small things like washing dishes too late or

1590
01:12:40,760 --> 01:12:44,280
Speaker 7: folding towels wrong. The situation kept getting worse, and what

1591
01:12:44,439 --> 01:12:46,639
Speaker 7: finally pushed me over the edge was when she put

1592
01:12:46,680 --> 01:12:50,000
Speaker 7: both me and my daughter in danger. She stopped the

1593
01:12:50,040 --> 01:12:52,519
Speaker 7: car in the middle of the road just to yell

1594
01:12:52,600 --> 01:12:55,559
Speaker 7: that I needed to stop arguing with her. That was

1595
01:12:55,600 --> 01:12:58,120
Speaker 7: the moment I decided to leave with my daughter. I

1596
01:12:58,160 --> 01:13:00,960
Speaker 7: had every legal right to do so as her mother,

1597
01:13:01,520 --> 01:13:04,320
Speaker 7: But when I tried to go, my mother tried to

1598
01:13:04,360 --> 01:13:07,000
Speaker 7: trap me in the house, physically grabbed my daughter to

1599
01:13:07,000 --> 01:13:09,160
Speaker 7: pull her away from me, and then called the police

1600
01:13:09,600 --> 01:13:12,800
Speaker 7: to claim I was kidnapping my own child. When that

1601
01:13:12,840 --> 01:13:16,280
Speaker 7: didn't work and I was safely in Louisiana with my fiance,

1602
01:13:16,439 --> 01:13:18,640
Speaker 7: who I had been in a long distance relationship with

1603
01:13:18,720 --> 01:13:21,360
Speaker 7: at the time, my mother reached out about a month later,

1604
01:13:21,439 --> 01:13:24,360
Speaker 7: pretending she wanted to send me a birthday gift. I

1605
01:13:24,400 --> 01:13:27,920
Speaker 7: was hesitant, but I eventually agreed. Then I was served

1606
01:13:28,000 --> 01:13:32,040
Speaker 7: custody papers on December eleventh of twenty fourteen. I had

1607
01:13:32,120 --> 01:13:34,080
Speaker 7: just two weeks to find an attorney and appear in

1608
01:13:34,120 --> 01:13:38,000
Speaker 7: Houston by December twenty second. That is how I lost custody.

1609
01:13:38,200 --> 01:13:40,400
Speaker 7: It was not because of substance use or neglect. It

1610
01:13:40,439 --> 01:13:42,400
Speaker 7: was because I trusted the wrong person and did not

1611
01:13:42,479 --> 01:13:44,920
Speaker 7: have the resources to fight her in court. I will

1612
01:13:44,920 --> 01:13:47,000
Speaker 7: never show appreciation to a woman who has made it

1613
01:13:47,040 --> 01:13:50,080
Speaker 7: clear she has hated me since conception, and who has mentally,

1614
01:13:50,120 --> 01:13:53,320
Speaker 7: emotionally and verbally mistreated me my entire thirty seven years.

1615
01:13:53,439 --> 01:13:55,200
Speaker 7: I do have to point out that if you did

1616
01:13:55,240 --> 01:13:57,759
Speaker 7: get served custody papers because you left to a different

1617
01:13:57,800 --> 01:14:00,800
Speaker 7: state with your daughter with a guy that you'd only

1618
01:14:00,880 --> 01:14:05,040
Speaker 7: known through long distance, that is a situation where on paper,

1619
01:14:05,800 --> 01:14:08,080
Speaker 7: and maybe even just in principle, it's like, maybe it

1620
01:14:08,160 --> 01:14:10,840
Speaker 7: is better for the daughter to be living with her grandparents.

1621
01:14:11,000 --> 01:14:13,240
Speaker 7: You know, you say that it's like she stopped the

1622
01:14:13,240 --> 01:14:15,120
Speaker 7: car in the middle of the road because you guys

1623
01:14:15,160 --> 01:14:19,200
Speaker 7: got an argument. But it's like, why are we participating

1624
01:14:19,200 --> 01:14:22,160
Speaker 7: in said argument? Probably about something stupid like you said,

1625
01:14:22,160 --> 01:14:25,639
Speaker 7: that doesn't really matter, like towels or dishes or whatever.

1626
01:14:26,080 --> 01:14:29,360
Speaker 7: It's just, you know, we got to learn how to navigate.

1627
01:14:29,880 --> 01:14:32,519
Speaker 7: You know, direct confrontation is not working with these people.

1628
01:14:32,600 --> 01:14:34,720
Speaker 7: We got to find different ways to cope. I am

1629
01:14:34,800 --> 01:14:38,240
Speaker 7: being forced to watch my daughter live my childhood while

1630
01:14:38,280 --> 01:14:40,919
Speaker 7: both of us are told I am a danger and unfit.

1631
01:14:41,280 --> 01:14:44,560
Speaker 7: When confronted, there is no explanation, just you are a

1632
01:14:44,680 --> 01:14:48,400
Speaker 7: danger and unfit. Nothing I do We'll please them. For

1633
01:14:48,479 --> 01:14:50,720
Speaker 7: eight years after the custody suit, I worked fourteen to

1634
01:14:50,760 --> 01:14:54,360
Speaker 7: sixteen hour days, moved multiple times, to find safer, better

1635
01:14:54,400 --> 01:14:58,400
Speaker 7: homes with space for including her own decorated room. During

1636
01:14:58,439 --> 01:15:01,760
Speaker 7: that time, I saw her regularly. Visits mostly stopped in

1637
01:15:01,800 --> 01:15:04,519
Speaker 7: twenty twenty when I had a terrible accident that broke

1638
01:15:04,600 --> 01:15:07,800
Speaker 7: my foot. Even then, my mother insinuated I could have

1639
01:15:07,920 --> 01:15:10,720
Speaker 7: just walked on it. It really feels like to me,

1640
01:15:11,120 --> 01:15:15,080
Speaker 7: like we're missing a part of the story that explains

1641
01:15:15,080 --> 01:15:17,800
Speaker 7: more on where this opinion of like being unfit and

1642
01:15:17,800 --> 01:15:20,880
Speaker 7: being a danger comes from, Like maybe where we're living

1643
01:15:21,000 --> 01:15:25,120
Speaker 7: our partner situation. Like I don't know, it's it seems

1644
01:15:25,160 --> 01:15:29,840
Speaker 7: like your parents are definitely like keeping you it on

1645
01:15:29,880 --> 01:15:34,280
Speaker 7: the outside, and I don't know how much of that

1646
01:15:34,400 --> 01:15:36,760
Speaker 7: is their fault versus your fault based on just how

1647
01:15:36,800 --> 01:15:40,280
Speaker 7: we're like acting and behaving and like the things that

1648
01:15:40,280 --> 01:15:44,120
Speaker 7: we're doing. Like, I don't know, I feel like it.

1649
01:15:44,200 --> 01:15:47,000
Speaker 3: Might be something missing in the story.

1650
01:15:47,439 --> 01:15:51,240
Speaker 7: Just because, yeah, if you're working fourteen sixteen hour days,

1651
01:15:51,520 --> 01:15:54,599
Speaker 7: you know, and moving from place to place a lot,

1652
01:15:55,200 --> 01:15:58,280
Speaker 7: it kind of does sound like maybe your kid would

1653
01:15:58,280 --> 01:16:00,320
Speaker 7: have been better off with your like.

1654
01:16:00,280 --> 01:16:02,720
Speaker 3: A stable household and right you know people who are

1655
01:16:02,800 --> 01:16:05,880
Speaker 3: there and who you know are going to be there

1656
01:16:06,600 --> 01:16:09,000
Speaker 3: for their growing years where they can't.

1657
01:16:08,840 --> 01:16:13,280
Speaker 7: Yeah too much. It's a hard situation. Despite malpractice issues,

1658
01:16:13,479 --> 01:16:16,439
Speaker 7: losing my vehicle, and being lucky to be alive, I

1659
01:16:16,520 --> 01:16:20,439
Speaker 7: kept trying when my fiance passed away. Despite reaching out,

1660
01:16:20,479 --> 01:16:24,479
Speaker 7: I was turned away. My instability happened before age twenty

1661
01:16:24,520 --> 01:16:27,479
Speaker 7: five and was worsened by trusting my mother, who waited

1662
01:16:27,560 --> 01:16:29,960
Speaker 7: until the last minute to tell me I would receive

1663
01:16:30,000 --> 01:16:33,920
Speaker 7: only minimal help, putting me into impossible situations. I was

1664
01:16:33,960 --> 01:16:36,920
Speaker 7: not looking for sympathy, only a less complicated, less dramatic

1665
01:16:36,960 --> 01:16:39,880
Speaker 7: way to explain how to move forward. Some have understood

1666
01:16:40,360 --> 01:16:45,280
Speaker 7: and given helpful advice. Many others seemed closed minded, wanting

1667
01:16:45,320 --> 01:16:48,000
Speaker 7: to see only a victim crying for pity. I don't

1668
01:16:48,040 --> 01:16:50,679
Speaker 7: want people feeling sorry for me, because that doesn't help.

1669
01:16:51,120 --> 01:16:54,000
Speaker 7: I am autistic, so what seems clear to me may

1670
01:16:54,040 --> 01:16:56,880
Speaker 7: not be clear to others. I leave some things out

1671
01:16:57,000 --> 01:17:00,000
Speaker 7: because I don't think they're necessary. I have not smoked

1672
01:17:00,280 --> 01:17:03,200
Speaker 7: since moving back here. I only mentioned the Devil's let

1673
01:17:03,240 --> 01:17:05,680
Speaker 7: us because if I were to do anything, that's the

1674
01:17:05,720 --> 01:17:09,280
Speaker 7: only thing I choose as it medically helps me, would

1675
01:17:09,320 --> 01:17:11,960
Speaker 7: I be the a hole? And we do have some

1676
01:17:12,000 --> 01:17:15,639
Speaker 7: comments here to finish it off. Comment one oh I'm

1677
01:17:15,760 --> 01:17:18,240
Speaker 7: so sorry you've been carrying all of this for so long.

1678
01:17:18,800 --> 01:17:20,880
Speaker 7: I can feel how much you love your daughter and

1679
01:17:20,960 --> 01:17:23,320
Speaker 7: how much your mom and stepdad have hurt you. I

1680
01:17:23,320 --> 01:17:25,760
Speaker 7: can't even imagine how exhausting it must be to try

1681
01:17:25,800 --> 01:17:28,280
Speaker 7: so hard for all these years and still feel blocked

1682
01:17:28,360 --> 01:17:31,880
Speaker 7: at every turn. The fact that you stayed sable and

1683
01:17:31,920 --> 01:17:34,519
Speaker 7: done everything you can shows just how much heart you've

1684
01:17:34,560 --> 01:17:38,120
Speaker 7: put into being a mom, even when nothing was easy. Honestly,

1685
01:17:38,160 --> 01:17:41,200
Speaker 7: it's okay to give yourself a break. Loving your daughter

1686
01:17:41,200 --> 01:17:43,720
Speaker 7: doesn't mean you have to throw yourself into situations that

1687
01:17:43,880 --> 01:17:46,800
Speaker 7: just break you. You can protect yourself while still finding

1688
01:17:46,840 --> 01:17:50,040
Speaker 7: ways to stay in your life. Maybe that's setting boundaries

1689
01:17:50,040 --> 01:17:53,080
Speaker 7: with your mom and stepdad, or finding smaller, safer ways

1690
01:17:53,120 --> 01:17:55,760
Speaker 7: to connect with your daughter that don't leave you raw

1691
01:17:55,920 --> 01:17:58,719
Speaker 7: every time. Your daughter is lucky to have a mom

1692
01:17:58,720 --> 01:18:01,280
Speaker 7: who cares this much, and that won't ever change no

1693
01:18:01,320 --> 01:18:04,600
Speaker 7: matter what your mom says. And that's the end of

1694
01:18:04,640 --> 01:18:08,479
Speaker 7: that story. Yeah, I mean, I've said all I can

1695
01:18:08,520 --> 01:18:11,040
Speaker 7: say about it. Yeah, that's all I got to say

1696
01:18:11,080 --> 01:18:11,519
Speaker 7: about that.

1697
01:18:12,080 --> 01:18:17,120
Speaker 3: I think that it just comes down to you know, obviously,

1698
01:18:17,160 --> 01:18:19,840
Speaker 3: you want to protect your daughter, and you want to

1699
01:18:19,880 --> 01:18:22,960
Speaker 3: protect yourself, so there are choices that you need to

1700
01:18:23,000 --> 01:18:26,800
Speaker 3: make in order to, you know, help yourself out and

1701
01:18:26,880 --> 01:18:29,360
Speaker 3: help her in the long run. I don't know what

1702
01:18:30,520 --> 01:18:35,120
Speaker 3: exactly the answer is here, but I think that starting

1703
01:18:35,160 --> 01:18:37,760
Speaker 3: off with how you feel and what's best for your

1704
01:18:37,840 --> 01:18:39,439
Speaker 3: daughter is a good place to start.

1705
01:18:40,200 --> 01:18:41,519
Speaker 7: And that's the end of this story.