Speaker 1: I feel like we haven't done this in like months, right,
Speaker 1: it was just last week, I know, but I'm like,
Speaker 1: how do I do this again? Okay, there we are.
Speaker 1: Someone will tell us if if we're not doing.
Speaker 2: It, so hopefully hopefully Okay, So I don't care about
Speaker 2: anything else right now except for hearing about your epic
Speaker 2: weekend at New Kids on the Blocks opening night of
Speaker 2: their residence. Taw me everything. I need details from the
Speaker 2: whole weekend. Let's start at the beginning. And it was amazing.
Speaker 1: I'm still recovering and not from drinking or anything or debauchery, Like,
Speaker 1: I'm just old, and I have trouble to stay here, Like.
Speaker 2: I just disrupted my sleep pattern and I had to
Speaker 2: use a different pillow.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, so like I came home with like a
Speaker 1: scratchy throat and my head's kind of throwing. So sorry
Speaker 1: about the smoker's voice. And I stayed on me too
Speaker 1: because I did.
Speaker 2: I was doing press and then a bunch of live
Speaker 2: shows and so I also, yeah, we've I said, we
Speaker 2: sound like we've smoked two packs already today.
Speaker 1: Hey, nothing like starting off the morning right with a
Speaker 1: two packer, right, But no, it was so fun, like
Speaker 1: it was just the ultimate girl's weekend. I love you know,
Speaker 1: I have friends from all around the world, all around
Speaker 1: the world, all around the country, right like my friend
Speaker 1: get me potentially all around the world. I'm sure. I'm
Speaker 1: sure I have friends there too, But the ones that
Speaker 1: I go to New Kids events with, I'm Katie from Connecticut,
Speaker 1: A two from Phoenix, Angela from Atlanta, and then Sanal
Speaker 1: from New York.
Speaker 2: We all meet like, Oh, I thought you were going
Speaker 2: to say Sanal from Syracuse. I was really hoping because
Speaker 2: everyone's to have Angela from Atlanta, like and.
Speaker 1: Like you know what I mean, everyone had like there.
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, this is like a thing I
Speaker 2: thought you were going to say, like you know, Sarah
Speaker 2: from xandiego.
Speaker 1: Well, we do joke because there's two Andreas in the group.
Speaker 1: I call her we call her A two and I'm
Speaker 1: a B just to like differentiate. But yeah, we've made
Speaker 1: jokes before about how everyone else will have to change
Speaker 1: their name to Andrea because there's two Andrea's.
Speaker 2: Well keep it going, but I think I think one
Speaker 2: of them needs to change.
Speaker 1: Where they say they're from. That would be a better Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: well let them I'll work on it. Katie from Connecticut
Speaker 1: was so son needs.
Speaker 2: Kati from Connecticut, Angela from Atlanta.
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, and then you like, from I'll
Speaker 1: tell her to move to Syracuse and that will solve that.
Speaker 1: San Diego, Seattle, San Francisco.
Speaker 2: You know, there's there's options, options, just not she's.
Speaker 1: More East Coast southern, you know. Ye, well she works
Speaker 1: in New York City, so that has to be we
Speaker 1: have Syracuse probably would be the easiest.
Speaker 2: Then yeah, yeah, okay, good let her know that that
Speaker 2: that that she needs to be chosen.
Speaker 1: Her next destination. Okay, yes, So anyways, it's great because
Speaker 1: we don't see each other like on the regular, so
Speaker 1: we have our annual like New Kids concert or crews
Speaker 1: or whatever it is. These are my homeies, my besties
Speaker 1: that I love that we get together, so it's so fun. Luckily,
Speaker 1: usually all these things are on the East Coast. But finally,
Speaker 1: finally Vegas we get something I can drive to. So
Speaker 1: I did. I did the whole road trip on the
Speaker 1: way and I charged at the same station that we charged,
Speaker 1: so yeah, I know it was so I drove out there.
Speaker 1: It was It's a beautiful drive, as you know, like
Speaker 1: it was just just a great ring. But yeah, I
Speaker 1: was at the park MGM, so we all met up.
Speaker 1: We had adjoining rooms. It's so fun. It's just I mean,
Speaker 1: Vegas is just a it's unlike any other place in
Speaker 1: the world.
Speaker 2: You know this, it's insane, right, You have to really
Speaker 2: you have to be willing to lean in against you
Speaker 2: know what I mean, Like you have to be there
Speaker 2: and be like.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's a it's a lot. Here we go. It's
Speaker 1: a lot. It's people. It's it's people. It's so overstimulating.
Speaker 2: My gosh, yes, it's it's and you just walk and
Speaker 2: if you're like, I'm going here we go, then you're
Speaker 2: fine with it. But if you're like, I don't know
Speaker 2: if I'm up for this, like it just.
Speaker 1: Feels like, you know, you just you have to like
Speaker 1: brace yourself, like especially, be like, okay, right here I go.
Speaker 2: I'm leaving the hotel room. I'm going out here I go.
Speaker 1: Right yeah, And of course it takes like twenty minutes
Speaker 1: to walk anywhere in the hotel, Like you know, you're
Speaker 1: walking and walking and getting Yeah, you're in Disneyland everywhere
Speaker 1: you're like here we Yeah, it all looks the same,
Speaker 1: it all looks the same but different.
Speaker 2: Right, ironically, I'm not I haven't even done to the
Speaker 2: New Kids part yet. Okay, so you know, I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: we're just breaking down Vegas.
Speaker 1: Yeah. The craziest thing was that my brother Darren, who's
Speaker 1: been on the podcast. He loves Vegas and goes all
Speaker 1: the time. He's he loves to gamble. So he's just like,
Speaker 1: you're in I guess I'm in Vegas, and I'm just like,
Speaker 1: you are not here. At the same time, he's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: what are you doing. I mean he's secretly a New
Speaker 1: Kids fan. No, no, no, absolutely not. He doesn't even
Speaker 1: know their names. He tried to recite their names, and
Speaker 1: he thought he and I would get along.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like, I know Donnie and then there's a
Speaker 1: Wallberg in there, and that's a Joey you know. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so we we met up just briefly, like
Speaker 1: he came to gamble at my hotel. I introduced him
Speaker 1: to my friends and then he like, so we went
Speaker 1: to blockhead Headquarters, which is like this experience blockheadquarters, blockhead Headquarters.
Speaker 1: I know, no, but really, if you were smart, it
Speaker 1: would have been block headquarters. Like that's just well they
Speaker 1: did say blockhead HQ. Is that better? No, it's better.
Speaker 2: I think I just feel like you could headquarters with
Speaker 2: the word yeah, blockheadquarters.
Speaker 1: Well i'll pass that note. I'll pass that note A.
Speaker 2: Lot to manage that along with her moving to Syracuse.
Speaker 1: So we went to block Headquarters. I'll just adopt that name, okay,
Speaker 1: which is where they have like all their merch There's
Speaker 1: the larger than life sized doll boxes that it's a
Speaker 1: photo opportunity. You get like stand in the photo box
Speaker 1: with your friends. They had like a confetti room, which
Speaker 1: was a little anti climactic, but you go in there
Speaker 1: for like thirty seconds and then like blow confetti everywhere
Speaker 1: and you can take a photo or a video or whatever.
Speaker 1: So that was a little out of control and crowded
Speaker 1: and crazy. But my brother like balcked his way in.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I had to get tickets for this, Like
Speaker 1: I had. You have to like refresh and get tickets.
Speaker 2: Wait, how do you have to get tickets and your
Speaker 2: brother got in for nothing?
Speaker 1: What's the other way around?
Speaker 2: At this point, new kids should be like you get
Speaker 2: a cut, you know what I mean? Like you you
Speaker 2: would have been such a dedicated fan. We actually are
Speaker 2: giving you a percentage of tickets in.
Speaker 1: The tickets were free, but you you did have to
Speaker 1: reserve them in advance because it was a capacity okay,
Speaker 1: clearly lot, like seventy five people in at a time
Speaker 1: because it would be like way too crowded. Fire secrets
Speaker 1: were free, but you did have to reserve them. So
Speaker 1: my friends and I reserved unless you're Darren.
Speaker 2: Barber, yeah, which case, well, he tried to talk his
Speaker 2: way in and then someone walked out and said, here,
Speaker 2: take my wristband, and so Darren walked in and tried
Speaker 2: to fire. And I'm like, you were such a fish
Speaker 2: out of water right now at blockhead Quarters.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's what you do.
Speaker 2: He's go ahead if you're not really that committed and
Speaker 2: you you'll find a way it'll happen.
Speaker 1: Oh and he did. He did. So anyways, Block Headquarters
Speaker 1: it was fine. It was too crowded and I never
Speaker 1: need to go again. But then the concert, you know concert,
Speaker 1: the opening night was Friday night. There was so much
Speaker 1: uh excitement in the air, like people were just breasing,
Speaker 1: Like blockheads were dressed up, there were sequins, there was
Speaker 1: tool there was just like short dresses, no dresses, there
Speaker 1: was just a whole lot of like everything, well not exactly,
Speaker 1: but you know, you know we're showing some skin. You know,
Speaker 1: this is great for it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Rocket, I've worked its Vegas. Nothing matters you walk around,
Speaker 2: Lord knows, I've walked around like.
Speaker 1: An idiot in Vegas.
Speaker 2: So I'm sure, yeah, that's dress, no dress, you know whatever.
Speaker 1: So if you recall the last time we talked, and
Speaker 1: I had said my expectations were very low because they
Speaker 1: only started rehearsals like two weeks in advance, right right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is gonna be It's been like ten days
Speaker 2: of them, six days of them are in four days
Speaker 2: of them rehearsal.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, this might just be the same old thing,
Speaker 1: the same old set list, and that's fine. I love
Speaker 1: them all, support them anyways. But my expectations were kind
Speaker 1: of low, and I was like, that's okay. Oh no,
Speaker 1: the entire Blockhead community was blown away. Like the guys
Speaker 1: stepped it up. They put some money into this show.
Speaker 1: The production value was next level for new kids. Okay,
Speaker 1: so yeah they had like a subway car. That's how
Speaker 1: they that's oh I should okay. If you're going to
Speaker 1: the concert and you don't want to be spoiled. Don't listen.
Speaker 1: Don't listen from here.
Speaker 2: On out because there's spoiler alert. There's yeah, subway cars.
Speaker 2: There was a subway everything else.
Speaker 1: That's how they like arrive on the stage because that
Speaker 1: was part of their Please Don't Go Girl video, which
Speaker 1: was their number one.
Speaker 2: It was the first video significance of them in the subway.
Speaker 2: Did they start singing in the subway?
Speaker 1: No, they were boys from Boston, so like they rode
Speaker 1: the tea everywhere and it's just a big part of
Speaker 1: the culture and that was a big part of the video.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so they like, legit step out of the
Speaker 1: subway car. It's an actual what I heard is it's
Speaker 1: an actual subway car from Boston that they somehow got
Speaker 1: to Vegas. Like I don't even know how you okay,
Speaker 1: So it's very authentic. Yeah. And then they had like
Speaker 1: they had a Corvette, like a white not a corvette.
Speaker 1: Is it a corvette? It's a convertible, a convert your car. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know my cars, but they they like another
Speaker 1: part they drive in on white was a.
Speaker 2: White Corvette some significance. What video was invertible that was.
Speaker 1: I'll Be Loving You Forever or was it hanging tough.
Speaker 1: I think it was I'll be Loving You forever. Okay,
Speaker 1: I don't know. One of the videos. Yeah, so they
Speaker 1: like go.
Speaker 2: Also, one of the videos was like a white white convertible, convertible,
Speaker 2: white convertible, like an old school Yeah.
Speaker 1: Like an old school probably like a Cadillac. Yeah, maybe Cadillac.
Speaker 1: That's what. That's like, a big one, like big long trunk. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: that's it. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so that was
Speaker 1: part of the number. But okay, the highlight of the show, well,
Speaker 1: there were a lot of highlights. They did some deep cuts,
Speaker 1: they did some numbers that they haven't performed in like
Speaker 1: fifteen years. Oh, they did some Yeah, we were very exciting.
Speaker 1: Was for the fans for sure, This was this is
Speaker 1: for the fans who were like, we have been here
Speaker 1: a long time and they were delivering. But the probably
Speaker 1: the highlight of the whole performance was they had these
Speaker 1: flying phone booths. I'm not kidding. They had they lowered
Speaker 1: these five It was like a phone booth or at
Speaker 1: first I thought it might have been like the doll box,
Speaker 1: but it was.
Speaker 2: Like almost like a British looking sort of phone.
Speaker 1: But like, yeah, it's just like a like like an
Speaker 1: old school phone booth, like an old school phone both.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Right, it was like that we recognized and that
Speaker 2: people young generations are like, well, what is that glass
Speaker 2: box which you stand in exactly.
Speaker 1: Every exactly, So it's like a it's kind of like
Speaker 1: a nod to the nineties. I thought it might have
Speaker 1: been like an old like like a doll box, but whatever,
Speaker 1: whatever you want to call it. Yeah, each each of
Speaker 1: the five guys they strapped themselves in and it took
Speaker 1: them way up to the top of the theater and
Speaker 1: out over the audience. They were like face to face
Speaker 1: with the balcony, with the audience in the balcony, and
Speaker 1: they asked their minds because they're in the balcony. They're
Speaker 1: just like, you know, we got the cheap seats, were
Speaker 1: never going to see them up close, and then they
Speaker 1: were there like right up close. They did a whole
Speaker 1: number from like the sky. It was great. John was very.
Speaker 2: Narouse did that at her at the last concert that
Speaker 2: she did, where she like got on this box thing
Speaker 2: and then it like raised and so it was at
Speaker 2: like sort of level to see.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so I mean, the things they can do now,
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's great. Well, they know, we don't.
Speaker 2: We're not used to this as blockheads because they usually
Speaker 2: tour like they get they put they load everything on
Speaker 2: a tour bus and they go around the pantry. Touring
Speaker 2: is I mean you can do I've seen tours the
Speaker 2: Beyonce tour. I mean there that is going city to
Speaker 2: city and it's.
Speaker 1: Und does she have five flying phone booths that she
Speaker 1: takes with her around the country.
Speaker 2: You would not believe the things that appear in a
Speaker 2: Beyonce concert. I've never been to a Beyonce concert. I
Speaker 2: only go to let me tell you, what do you
Speaker 2: want to talk production value? Oh, I can imagine. I
Speaker 2: can't imagine.
Speaker 1: Hers is just next level. Yeah, but for new kids,
Speaker 1: this was great. They can do a lot more things.
Speaker 1: Flying phone booths. I'm totally for flying phone but it
Speaker 1: was amazing. It was I got a little nervous, I
Speaker 1: have to admit I was a little nervous for them
Speaker 1: because then well, yeah, because you know you got like
Speaker 1: Donnie who's like moving it around. He's like there's always
Speaker 1: one kid that has to like shake the you know,
Speaker 1: shake the phone, swing on. It's like that. So I
Speaker 1: was like, don't do that, you know. Anyways, it was outstanding.
Speaker 1: It was definitely highlight but the whole show, Like I screamed,
Speaker 1: the higher time I stood, the entire time I danced,
Speaker 1: the entire time. It was just the best, Like, oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, I'm so proud of them because it's such
Speaker 1: it's honestly one of their best shows they've ever done,
Speaker 1: if not the best show they've ever done.
Speaker 2: That's that's exactly what it should be, you know what
Speaker 2: I mean. And it sounds like they really considered the
Speaker 2: fact that a lot of the people coming to this
Speaker 2: are like die hard fans that have loved them for
Speaker 2: a long time. So like give them stuff that they know,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, Like give them stuff that's
Speaker 2: not just sort of the surface level, like not just
Speaker 2: best hits, right, Yeah, exactly, play it for the fans
Speaker 2: that like get really excited to hear some of those
Speaker 2: deep cuts.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it was so good. It was so good.
Speaker 1: I'm going back in November because they're doing I don't
Speaker 1: know how many shows, they're doing anything three weekends in
Speaker 1: June and then they take a long break and then
Speaker 1: they come back in November. So I will be back
Speaker 1: in November of course, and yeah, it was just amazing.
Speaker 1: Go see it. Or if you're in Vegas, go see it.
Speaker 1: If you're not in Vegas, go to Vegas and see it.
Speaker 1: It's it's phenomenal. It was just always a good time,
Speaker 1: even the the you know, they always have like the
Speaker 1: older people who were comps to get in, like the
Speaker 1: people who were in the casino and you're like.
Speaker 2: Oh, here, right, we're gonna give your free tickets.
Speaker 1: To something because you've lost all your money gambling or whatever. Right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: older people were totally into it. So I'm just like,
Speaker 1: this is multi generational. It's great. I mean, let's be fair.
Speaker 2: At this point, those people are our parents' age. So
Speaker 2: they had to listen to this crap. Yeah crap, but
Speaker 2: I don't mean it like right, but they listened. This
Speaker 2: was the stuff that they listened to in the car
Speaker 2: with us on the.
Speaker 1: Radio, you know what I mean. It's like, yes, this
Speaker 1: is like the tailor Swift for a side girls, you know,
Speaker 1: so we'd.
Speaker 2: Like seventy five will be like, oh my gosh, I
Speaker 2: remember this Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1: Yeah it's so great. Yeah, a great trip. Just I've
Speaker 1: just been floating, even though I have like a head cold.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: I've just been floating for days because it was amazing.
Speaker 2: So well, I am so glad that. I'm so glad
Speaker 2: that you had a good time and had a good
Speaker 2: we thank you.
Speaker 1: Yes, and me too. I couldn't wait, your doll, I
Speaker 1: couldn't wait to tell you about it and share it
Speaker 1: with our fan read ice. I know well.
Speaker 2: I texted you at one point this weekend and you.
Speaker 1: Were like, oh, I'm driving back. I was like that girl,
Speaker 1: never mind, like go please do not. Don't worry about
Speaker 1: me now.
Speaker 2: Yes, you'll go do NKOTB and we will talk when
Speaker 2: you get back.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yep, it's so great. Oh good great, Yes, And
Speaker 1: I know you were You did some traveling yourself. We
Speaker 1: were both out of town. You went to New y
Speaker 1: How was your whirlwind trip to New York? It was lovely.
Speaker 2: I went to New York. Uh for like you know,
Speaker 2: less than forty eight hours. I did Good Morning America
Speaker 2: and what else? Good to New York and people and
Speaker 2: a few other things nice.
Speaker 1: But it was great and I did it.
Speaker 2: It was pressed for my lifetime movie that came out
Speaker 2: on the twenty first.
Speaker 1: It already came out, dang it. I gotta watch it
Speaker 1: Saturday the twenty first.
Speaker 2: It's called Dateless to Dangerous my Son's Secret Life. I'm
Speaker 2: going to watch the drama, but no, it's about you know,
Speaker 2: young boy, teenage boy that gets radicalized online in these
Speaker 2: sort of manisphere misogynistic, racist, violent areas of the internet
Speaker 2: that are really attracting a lot of young men through
Speaker 2: community and feeling like they belong.
Speaker 1: And all this kind of stuff.
Speaker 2: So I felt like it was a really important topic.
Speaker 2: I mean, and also, of course Adolescence had come out
Speaker 2: has come out recently, yea, so people are really talking
Speaker 2: about this topic and sort of you know, what's happening
Speaker 2: to young people in general, but young men in general
Speaker 2: are turning towards violence and hatred and rage and and
Speaker 2: it's very scary, so important and so anyway, I was
Speaker 2: really really happy with it. I haven't watched the whole
Speaker 2: thing yet because I was wondering, I ever do right
Speaker 2: that watch podcasts in thirty years? Is reach Out your
Speaker 2: lifetime movie? But yeah, I I was really you know,
Speaker 2: I've watched that half of it. I was really really
Speaker 2: proud of what we did.
Speaker 1: So and the kids in it.
Speaker 2: Alexander Elliott that plays my son Miles and Nikki Rumel
Speaker 2: who plays my daughter Hayley.
Speaker 1: They were just phenomenal actors. It's a heavy topic. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a lovely topic.
Speaker 2: And you know when you read the script, you're like, oh,
Speaker 2: I love this script.
Speaker 1: Like but you know, you're like, I really hope whoever.
Speaker 2: You know, the the young actress that plays Miles, like
Speaker 2: they really have to carry a lot on their shoulders,
Speaker 2: and I hope, you know, and you just want a
Speaker 2: really great actor for it, and we got one.
Speaker 1: So it was it was great. But yeah, I went
Speaker 1: and did pressed for that.
Speaker 2: Saw my friend Josh McBride in New York and we
Speaker 2: went out to a concert thing at his friend's house
Speaker 2: for Juneteenth, which was it was We went down to
Speaker 2: Harlem and his friends they do like this huge concert
Speaker 2: on the stoop of a of a Brownstone on like
Speaker 2: one nineteenth and Lenox and it's his friends Brownstone that
Speaker 2: they have this thing on.
Speaker 1: Like the street was packed. It was just it was
Speaker 1: such a great vibe, really really really amazing. And I
Speaker 1: was such a New York that's such a New York
Speaker 1: thing too, Like this is such a New York thing.
Speaker 2: It was such a and it was you know again
Speaker 2: it was a juneteen celebration, so it was there was just, uh,
Speaker 2: just a really great amount of like black culture represented
Speaker 2: and joy and positivity, and it was I was just
Speaker 2: really honored that I, you know, got to got to
Speaker 2: come down for a little bit and hear some amazing
Speaker 2: music and have some fun.
Speaker 1: And yeah, so I did that.
Speaker 2: That was like my one little bit of sort of
Speaker 2: fun that you know, we got in there. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: then uh yeah, and then I came home and then
Speaker 2: I uh did my live show on Saturday. I did
Speaker 2: my smoke show with Sweet and Comedy Pageant our Pride
Speaker 2: Edition on Saturday. Oh.
Speaker 1: It was great. It was great.
Speaker 2: We had Jessica Michelle Singleton, who's a hilarious comic, Sandy
Speaker 2: Danto who's been on a bunch of Comedy Central and
Speaker 2: Tonight Show and stuff, and then my friend Daniel Webb
Speaker 2: who has been opening for Margaret Show on the road
Speaker 2: for a while. So we had we had a lot
Speaker 2: of fun and you know, it was a great time.
Speaker 2: And we have our next one July nineteenth.
Speaker 1: Yes, so that's the one that I'm going to try
Speaker 1: to come. That's the one that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you're coming to and Kim and yeah.
Speaker 1: Sony, is Melanie coming, I don't know, but we think
Speaker 1: Melo's gonna come anyway. But yeah, it's so July nineteenth.
Speaker 2: We spoke LA if anybody here in the LA area
Speaker 2: wants to come come out support say hello. Yeah, well there,
Speaker 2: So there was one lovely fan and her husband who
Speaker 2: came and they were taking their daughter down to a
Speaker 2: dance competition in San Diego and the show happened to
Speaker 2: be like on their way sort of down there, and
Speaker 2: so they brought the kid and I so we were like, wait, there's.
Speaker 1: A kid in the audience.
Speaker 2: So, but the venue also has these spaces that are
Speaker 2: soundproof podcasting booths, and so the venue had said the
Speaker 2: little girl really just wanted to see me come out
Speaker 2: on stage and get a picture afterwards, and her mom
Speaker 2: was totally fine with her sitting in the soundproof booth
Speaker 2: like to the side of the room on her iPad
Speaker 2: with headphones while we had you know, the completely outrageous
Speaker 2: like Pride comedy show that just made a lot of
Speaker 2: dick jokes. So yeah, but at first I was like, oh, no,
Speaker 2: a child. Yeah, I didn't plan and I was like,
Speaker 2: I mean, you know, I guess I was like nine
Speaker 2: when I went with Bob the the Laugh Factory and
Speaker 2: I turned out, all right, is so, what's the worse
Speaker 2: that could happen? But no, she was she was in
Speaker 2: a soundproof booth, so her innocence has been prolong and
Speaker 2: she was very cute and super sweet and excited to
Speaker 2: get a picture.
Speaker 1: And oh I love that. Yeah it was. The show
Speaker 1: went really great.
Speaker 2: I'm having such an awesome time doing it. And yeah,
Speaker 2: it was fun.
Speaker 1: I love it. Did you make a lot of changes
Speaker 1: from the first show or was it pretty much?
Speaker 2: We we just we have like a rotating where we
Speaker 2: try and kind of rotate out a few different segments
Speaker 2: each time. Yeah, and you know, it's we're still kind
Speaker 2: of in the early stages of this particular show, so
Speaker 2: we're like trying new things out. Things that worked really well. Okay,
Speaker 2: well it's that we like that keep that you know,
Speaker 2: this one Okay, maybe that didn't hit so great, you know,
Speaker 2: but it's, uh, it's going really well.
Speaker 1: I love that. We're very happy with it, and I
Speaker 1: can't wait to see it. So I'll get to see
Speaker 1: it at the show next I cannot wait. It's gonna
Speaker 1: be so good.
Speaker 2: Well, since we've done a minie show Chattered.
Speaker 1: You guys want to get to the boy.
Speaker 2: What Literally, it's just like, here's our weekend, let's see.
Speaker 2: Oh god if it's twenty two minutes and I am
Speaker 2: so sorry everyone, Sorry, everybody.
Speaker 1: We had a lot to catch up on. We had
Speaker 1: a big weekends, and we've been seen each other in
Speaker 1: like seven days, so we had a lot to catch
Speaker 1: up in a week, and many things have happened.
Speaker 2: Okay, here we go, ready, one, two, three, and now welcome.
Speaker 1: Back to How Rude tan Ritos. I'm Andrea Barber and
Speaker 1: I'm Jody Sweet, and today we're discussing season five, episode two,
Speaker 1: Matchmaker Michelle. It originally aired September twenty fourth, nineteen ninety one,
Speaker 1: and it goes a little something like this, Michelle and Teddy.
Speaker 2: Schem scheme scheme schem scheme scheme is that schmear it's
Speaker 2: a shitchle right, Like, no, it's not a Yiddish word.
Speaker 1: That is scheme schem scheme.
Speaker 2: Si. I like saying scheme, so schemy.
Speaker 1: There you go. We should do this whole recap pronouncing
Speaker 1: the things wrong. That would be Oh, people would really
Speaker 1: love that.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, twenty three minutes in that's what we should
Speaker 2: start doing.
Speaker 1: Okay, so Michelle and Teddy scheme to couple Danny with
Speaker 1: their kindergarten teacher, which is really Michelle who's scheming or scheming,
Speaker 1: and Teddy's just kind of like going along. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but Michelle, Michelle has an agenda, she has Teddy's kind
Speaker 1: of like kind of be I mean, we'll get that,
Speaker 1: we'll get there. Yeah, he's kind of started this whole thing,
Speaker 1: so gonna start That's kind of Teddy's fault. Blame Teddy.
Speaker 1: It was directed by Joelswick, it was written by Ellen Guiless,
Speaker 1: and we got great guest stars returning. Gary returns as
Speaker 1: Gary Griffin, the Redheaded Ripper. Yeah it was great. I
Speaker 1: think he had a line. I think he's the one
Speaker 1: that yelled at Jesse and the Smash Club or yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: a line, so he gets credit. June Lockhart returns as
Speaker 1: Miss will Trout, and Taj Marie returns as Teddy. And
Speaker 1: oh boys, he the most adorable little living doll. He
Speaker 1: is just so so cuute. We start with the teezer
Speaker 1: in the girls room. Michelle runs into the room and
Speaker 1: makes a bee line for dj who is fast asleep.
Speaker 1: Even though all the lights are still on, very bright house.
Speaker 1: She shakes her sister and shouts, DJ, DJ, wake up.
Speaker 1: DJ groans, oh, it's Saturday morning. I'm sleeping. Michelle questions,
Speaker 1: then why are you talking? And DJ explains I'm talking
Speaker 1: in my sleep. Good night, and throws her pillow over
Speaker 1: her head. Michelle completely disregards DJ's hope for peace and quiet.
Speaker 1: She shouts, you're missing the road Runner cartoon, and then
Speaker 1: she runs around the room mimicking the Roadrunner Meet Me,
Speaker 1: Meet me. DJ interrupts, Hey, looney tune, cut the meeping.
Speaker 1: When you reach a certain age, you're just too mature
Speaker 1: to waste your Saturday morning watching cartoons. Right on cue.
Speaker 1: Joey excitedly runs into the room to tell Michelle that
Speaker 1: she's missing Roadrunner. He gives her a brief rundown on
Speaker 1: what she's missed. Apparently, Wiley Coyote is suspended midair but
Speaker 1: hasn't started to fall just yet. Michelle questions, how come
Speaker 1: he doesn't fall until he looks down, and Joey tells
Speaker 1: her that's how cartoon gravity works. That's kind of true,
Speaker 1: you know, like they all like the suspend air look down.
Speaker 1: Can you imagine if that was really how it was like,
Speaker 1: if you just ran hard enough off of the thing,
Speaker 1: you'd be like, I just don't look down, just look downtown.
Speaker 1: It's kind of like that Squid Game episode, you know,
Speaker 1: like don't let yeah back down? Yeah yeah, give you
Speaker 1: a dark So Joey grabs her hand and pulls her
Speaker 1: out of the room so they can continue watching. On
Speaker 1: their way out, they both shout meet me, mape me,
Speaker 1: and DJ sighs, Oh well, I'm up, and she trudges
Speaker 1: towards the door and half heartedly copies them, Mate mebe,
Speaker 1: mate mebe. Next to Michelle's room, Joey walks in with
Speaker 1: Teddy and happily tells Michelle that someone came over to play.
Speaker 1: Michelle casually says hi Teddy, and Teddy smiles Hi, Michelle.
Speaker 1: Joey wonders, so what are you too? Crazy kids up
Speaker 1: to a little tea party, and Teddy mischievously grins, We're
Speaker 1: gonna play Terminator two. Joey imitates Arnold Schwarzenegger and responds, Oh,
Speaker 1: no problem o asta la vista baby, consider that a divorce.
Speaker 1: I'm the party pooper.
Speaker 2: I didn't get the last two, but maybe it's because
Speaker 2: I haven't ever seen any of the terminators.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, these are like his classic lines that he
Speaker 1: says that in that same voice. Okay. Michelle and Teddy
Speaker 1: crack up at Joey's silliness, and then Joey tries to
Speaker 1: exit the room, but his muscly stance prevents him from
Speaker 1: doing so. The kids continue to laugh and Joey eyes
Speaker 1: them I'll be back, and then he side steps out
Speaker 1: of the room. Dave really commits to these bits, like
Speaker 1: he just goes for it. I mean, Dave loves a
Speaker 1: good voice, you know, yes, so good at it. So
Speaker 1: Michelle suggests that she and Teddy play house. Teddy agrees
Speaker 1: and offers to play the daddy, and Michelle exclaims, I'll
Speaker 1: play Uncle Jesse. Teddy's face scrunches with confusion. Uncle Jesse,
Speaker 1: you should be the mommy, and Michelle admits I don't
Speaker 1: know how to be a mommy. I know. Heartbreak. We
Speaker 1: basically in the first scene still and it's like starting he's.
Speaker 2: Like my mom's dad, I mean, but at least I
Speaker 2: mean always we're talking about.
Speaker 1: It, and we're talking about it. Really, this is the.
Speaker 2: First time we've ever really seen Michelle deal with it,
Speaker 2: because she's been so little up util that.
Speaker 1: That's true, that's this is a very important episode in
Speaker 1: that respect. Yeah, and Teddy asks why not, and Michelle
Speaker 1: informs him, I don't have a mommy, So Teddy advises her,
Speaker 1: you should get one. Mommies use fabric softener on your pajamas.
Speaker 1: Michelle smiles, My daddy does that.
Speaker 2: See egalitarian from in the early es.
Speaker 1: My dad does the laundry. Yeah, it's like you don't
Speaker 1: need a mom for that. Yeah, Danny Tanner, Teddy ads,
Speaker 1: mommies always have good candy in their purse, and Michelle admits,
Speaker 1: my daddy has wet naps in his wallet. Teddy tells
Speaker 1: her that mommies smell nice and wear pretty dresses, and
Speaker 1: Michelle's I mean, if they want to, sometimes they might
Speaker 1: wear pants. This is the nineties. I know they're very gender,
Speaker 1: but it was yeah, yeah, no, I get it. I
Speaker 1: get it. And Michelle size you got me there. Teddy
Speaker 1: doesn't sugarcoat it. It's too bad you don't have a mommy.
Speaker 1: You're missing something good. Harsh. Oh, this is just brutalil brutal. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Michelle pouts and lays her head in her hands. You're right,
Speaker 1: I need a mommy. Yeah, straight out of the gate.
Speaker 1: This is just like, this is heart wrenching. Yeah. So
Speaker 1: I was reminded of the Honeybee sleepover episode where those
Speaker 1: girls just kept let's do let's wear high heels and
Speaker 1: two right right right, rubbing it in. And I was
Speaker 1: so irritated at those Honeybees. But I'm not irritated, not
Speaker 1: as irritated with Teddy for some reason, because I don't
Speaker 1: know he's.
Speaker 2: Yelling because well he's younger, and also it's one on one. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's so it doesn't feel as obviously.
Speaker 1: Slighting like you're the only one, like when you're.
Speaker 2: The only one left out and it's a mom and
Speaker 2: a daughter thing.
Speaker 1: Like it, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: They it was almost like a point to be exclusionary
Speaker 2: from everybody else.
Speaker 1: And this just is like a little kid asking a question. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and Teddy he doesn't know any better. He does, he's
Speaker 1: not trying to make her feel bad.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So like I kind of like, you know, you're
Speaker 2: like damn, but this is what kids do, right, And
Speaker 2: they're like.
Speaker 1: Why is why do you have a weird nose? And
Speaker 1: You're like, oh cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah's on their minds, Like yeah about that all my life.
Speaker 1: It's kind of a prerequisite for five year olds to
Speaker 1: just blab out whatever's on their mind.
Speaker 2: They say the uncomfortable thing before you learn that sometimes
Speaker 2: you shouldn't say things.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so Teddy gets a pass for this. It was
Speaker 1: made me sad, but I'm not mad at him because
Speaker 1: he's just being a five year old. Next, in the
Speaker 1: girls room, Danny is vacuuming while Steph is doing homework
Speaker 1: on her bed and wearing her cute glasses. Yeah, I'm glad,
Speaker 1: like I look like Arnold. Is that the name of it.
Speaker 2: No, not Arnold Waldo. No, oh, yeah, that's w Waldo.
Speaker 1: There's also weird.
Speaker 2: There's another little cartoon. I think that it has like
Speaker 2: some but the turtle. There's a turtle that wears glasses
Speaker 2: and but it's the little round ones.
Speaker 1: Yeah Waldo. Frank Is it Franklin? No, that's what I'm
Speaker 1: thinking of. Franklin. We have My turtle's name is Franklin.
Speaker 1: So yeah, that's why. That's the only reason why I know.
Speaker 2: Yeah between yeah, somewhere between Franklin and Waldo.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love it. So Steph erases something on her
Speaker 1: paper and Danny takes the liberty of vacuuming up the
Speaker 1: eraser shavings. This hate eraser shavings. I know they an
Speaker 1: it's very annoying. I agree. This sparks a brilliant idea
Speaker 1: in her mind, and she tells her dad, just to
Speaker 1: save you some more cleaning, what's the capital of Ecuador?
Speaker 1: Danny insists it'd be better for her to look it
Speaker 1: up instead of him just giving her the answer. Steph
Speaker 1: sees right through him. You don't know, do you, and
Speaker 1: Danny admits, not a clue. It's Keto. By the way. See,
Speaker 1: I was going to say, what is the guy? I
Speaker 1: looked it up. I would like to know. I look
Speaker 1: at I didn't know, but I looked it up. It's Keto. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: good to know. Now we all know it's an educational
Speaker 1: podcast here geography. So then DJ walks in and tells
Speaker 1: her dad, I have to write a paper about what
Speaker 1: it's like being another person. So guess what I'm doing.
Speaker 1: I'm going to live in someone else's house for two days,
Speaker 1: and someone else is going to live here. Danny responds
Speaker 1: that sounds like a neat idea. Who's going to live here?
Speaker 2: This is? It feels like something you'd need a permission
Speaker 2: slip for first you know what I.
Speaker 1: Mean, Like the parents don't know we're switching kids.
Speaker 2: What in today's ag you'd have to sign one million
Speaker 2: release forms and like yeah, now all of all of them.
Speaker 2: This is where the idea for the show wife swap came.
Speaker 1: Oh I bet from this, from this very right, yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: so on cue Jimmy Gibbler comes barging into the room,
Speaker 1: knocking her suitcases against the wall without a care in
Speaker 1: the world. It's such a good interest.
Speaker 2: You are buff because you've got suitcases full as of
Speaker 2: you're slanging them.
Speaker 1: Yeah right, Like I love it was great. Like I
Speaker 1: just I'm gonna just brag about myself for just like
Speaker 1: I I'm just so proud of how I embodied like
Speaker 1: the physicality of mcause that was direction, Like that was me.
Speaker 1: I'm just like, I'm going to bang these things again.
Speaker 2: I'm just yeah, because you're like, that's Kimmy is just
Speaker 2: let me come in as loudly and obnoxiously as possible
Speaker 2: and oblivious do my, she's just.
Speaker 1: A bullet and china shop.
Speaker 2: But she doesn't care, so just doesn't Yeah, no idea.
Speaker 1: I freaking love that. So anyways, she greets Danny ola
Speaker 1: mister T, and Stephanie runs up to her dad in horror.
Speaker 2: Do something she's got luggage.
Speaker 1: Danny shakes his head, God save us all. DJ laps
Speaker 1: them off. It's for school. Every good grade helps me
Speaker 1: get into college. Danny then goes back on everything he's
Speaker 1: ever said to his girls about schooling. You know, a
Speaker 1: good education is highly overrated. DJ tells her family members
Speaker 1: to relax, and she assures them that she'll they'll have
Speaker 1: a great time because Kimmy isn't actually Kimmy. She's gonna
Speaker 1: be DJ, and DJ won't be herself because she's gonna
Speaker 1: be Kimmy. Then she stops her rambling and asks, am
Speaker 1: I going too fast? Mister T? Danny demands, I want
Speaker 1: my little girl back. DJ shrugs, don't look at me,
Speaker 1: She's right here, and she points to Kimmy, who gives
Speaker 1: Danny a huge grin in response. Danny tells Kimmy that
Speaker 1: they can give this a try as long as she
Speaker 1: behaves like DJ, but Kimmy tells him there are a
Speaker 1: few slight differences. She doesn't do housework, homework, or anything
Speaker 1: with work in it. DJ smiles, well, enjoy the new
Speaker 1: me audios tan Rito's and she happily walks away. Stephan
Speaker 1: Danny are now left alone with Kimmy, who asks, so
Speaker 1: what do we do now? And then she realizes you
Speaker 1: people like to hug, don't you, and she proceeds to
Speaker 1: give them an unwonted big group hug. And you're O, Kimmy,
Speaker 1: your facial expression kills me in this. In this bit,
Speaker 1: you're just like your face is right to the camera. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: so funny. This is a great little storyline, Like I
Speaker 1: loved this. Oh, this was very funny, so funny. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Then in the your headband was me say, it looked
Speaker 2: really cute covered my entire the entire top of my remember,
Speaker 2: I mean they're kind of coming but yeah, like the
Speaker 2: big fifth band over one use him as a tube
Speaker 2: top or a headband. Yes, that's exactly just glue, some
Speaker 2: fake jewels or something on that exactly what it is
Speaker 2: so great.
Speaker 1: So next in the kitchen, Jesse walks in. He's looking
Speaker 1: down in the dumps. He tells Becky and Joey that
Speaker 1: Jesse and the Rippers got turned down by another record company.
Speaker 1: Didn't they just have a tour, right, didn't they? What
Speaker 1: just happened. That was just the whole problem, Like he
Speaker 1: was going to be away from the babies and the
Speaker 1: pregnancy or whatever.
Speaker 2: So did he go like screwed, I'm not gonna do that,
Speaker 2: but I'm gonna go try and get another record.
Speaker 1: I'm confused, Okay, I don't know. Suddenly he's now having
Speaker 1: a midlife crisis with this with his band. So apparently
Speaker 1: the Rippers image is too soft. That's all those mullets.
Speaker 1: The mullets man Jesse argues that he's tougher than anybody,
Speaker 1: and immediately after saying this, he turns on his baby
Speaker 1: voice and says hello to Becky's baby bump. He touches
Speaker 1: her belly and calls the baby's his twinsy Winsies, which
Speaker 1: snaps him back to reality.
Speaker 2: He asks, and I have to say, it's seeing how
Speaker 2: women rock pregnancy now.
Speaker 1: Like you look at Laurie's outfits, even.
Speaker 2: What I wore when I was pregnant, and I was like, wow.
Speaker 1: It was just like you were just a tent.
Speaker 2: You look it looked like like it was still all
Speaker 2: trapped in like nineteen sixty five.
Speaker 1: It looked very datd Ban.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's just wearing a giant circus. She's like a giant.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean, you know, like with the bumps
Speaker 2: and stuff, like you kind of had to give it.
Speaker 2: They didn't look exactly super real, so you had to
Speaker 2: give it a little you know, space. But yeah, but
Speaker 2: that was what was maternity, where you just cover.
Speaker 1: It up like it's not there. But yeah, you don't
Speaker 1: want to hear about those details, see them, just cover
Speaker 1: that up. No, I think No, Kimmy, when I was
Speaker 1: pregnant in a fuller house, they had way more fashionable stuff.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I improved, improved dramatically in the last thirty years. So,
Speaker 1: Joey mocks Jesse in a baby voice. Yes he Wessy Jesse.
Speaker 1: Jesse admits he's a woos He asks Becky what he
Speaker 1: should do. He has a showcase tomorrow night for another
Speaker 1: record company. Becky reminds him that he and Joey used
Speaker 1: to be in advertising, right, get that up.
Speaker 2: Didn't they have a whole like recording studio and like
Speaker 2: like didn't they? Yes, what happened to the jingle writing
Speaker 2: and the advertising bits and the company, Well they had
Speaker 2: to turn it into an apartment, the jade into the basement, right,
Speaker 2: So why why is Jesse, I don't know. Yeah, they
Speaker 2: just abandoned the J and J Creative Services or whatever
Speaker 2: it was called. Everything before this episode didn't happen. It
Speaker 2: was all a dreaming. It's did we shoot these out
Speaker 2: of order? I know.
Speaker 1: So Becky suggests they get the old team back together
Speaker 1: and come up with a bad image. Jesse wonders what
Speaker 1: Joey could possibly know about being bad. He watches cartoons
Speaker 1: all day. Joey scoffs, are you trying to tell me
Speaker 1: the Tasmanian Devil isn't bad? Jesse shrugs. What does he do?
Speaker 1: Joey boasts, He spins around and slobbers, and then he
Speaker 1: does a very perfect and very slobbery impression of the
Speaker 1: Tasmanian Devil, which has John breaking.
Speaker 2: I mean, can you imagine just doing that, have Dave
Speaker 2: do that in your face?
Speaker 1: You'd be like, oh, be like, oh gosh, yeah it
Speaker 1: was that was you can tell me.
Speaker 2: I can only imagine the in between my you know
Speaker 2: what I mean, Like what he was saying that that
Speaker 2: just makes it even more be And you.
Speaker 1: Know, Dave went for it and just tried to get
Speaker 1: as much spittle on Scott.
Speaker 2: He was just like I'm gonna just yeah, this is
Speaker 2: for all the time, as you slap me on the head.
Speaker 1: Sweet revenge. So after composing himself, Jesse declares, you're an idiot,
Speaker 1: but I'm desperate, and Joey happily continues his pression as
Speaker 1: Jesse drags him upstairs while Becky's eating her very large lunch.
Speaker 1: Completely it never gets a dressed, by the way, just.
Speaker 2: The whole last turkey right there, a whole turkey dinner,
Speaker 2: and never once is it mentioned.
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess.
Speaker 2: She's got the yams with the marshmows, she's got the turkey.
Speaker 1: Then never once does Joey or Jesse go like a
Speaker 1: whole turkey you know what? Never mind like nothing. You
Speaker 1: know that was a setup for a joke. Did the
Speaker 1: joke get cut? I don't know. But eating for two
Speaker 1: that had to be the setup for a joke. But yes,
Speaker 1: never mentioned. She's just eating out of a giant turkey's cavity.
Speaker 1: It's just stiric, right. I wonder if they brind it.
Speaker 2: I hope so, man, if they put it in an
Speaker 2: orange home deepa bucket like we.
Speaker 1: Did, I don't know that. I think that's special between
Speaker 1: you and me.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't think they went to that kind of effort, right, So,
Speaker 1: while Becky's eating her a very large lunch, Michelle walks in.
Speaker 1: She sweetly asks Aunt Becky can we talk? And Becky
Speaker 1: says yes, so Michelle plops down in the seat next
Speaker 1: to her. Becky asks what she'd like to talk about,
Speaker 1: and Michelle asks, how do I get a mommy. Becky
Speaker 1: is obviously caught off guard, but she says, well, first,
Speaker 1: your daddy needs to fall in love with a nice lady.
Speaker 1: Michelle wonders, how do you fall in love? Becky responds,
Speaker 1: I fell in love with your uncle Jesse over a
Speaker 1: candlelight dinner with flowers and soft music. It was very romantic.
Speaker 1: Michelle Grinson asks, was there kissing?
Speaker 2: This was such a toddler question, but like a five
Speaker 2: year old question, like.
Speaker 1: Right right, Becky Grin's back, Yes, there was. It was
Speaker 1: just a little good night kiss that lasted three hours.
Speaker 1: Then Michelle asks, how come nobody kisses my daddy. Becky
Speaker 1: admits that's a good question and she doesn't have an answer.
Speaker 1: Her dad is a great guy. But then Becky he
Speaker 1: starts to list Danny's flaws. He spends all his time cleaning,
Speaker 1: and he talks too much, especially about himself. So Becky
Speaker 1: comes to a conclusion, all your daddy needs to do
Speaker 1: is find a nice lady who's a good listener and
Speaker 1: needs a housekeeper. Michelle stares at her. Michelle stares at
Speaker 1: her blankly. So Becky tries to assure her she's somewhere
Speaker 1: out there and when he finds her, he'll fall in
Speaker 1: love and then you'll have a new mommy.
Speaker 2: Do you understand? Michelle nods, yes, I do. My daddy
Speaker 2: needs help. I also feel like I don't know it
Speaker 2: was well, and I guess we address that when she
Speaker 2: talks to Danny about it later.
Speaker 1: But that like, it's not that she's getting.
Speaker 2: Like a new mommy, but you know what I mean,
Speaker 2: like that she'll always have a feeling like Becky would
Speaker 2: have been the one to be like, no, you at
Speaker 2: a mommy, but you would get somebody.
Speaker 1: Else that loves you. But I guess we get to
Speaker 1: that at the end. So yeah, that's true, we get
Speaker 1: to that at the end. But yeah, at first, I
Speaker 1: was like, we're not explaining this well people, But yeah,
Speaker 1: we're getting pam shmam, you know what I mean? They
Speaker 1: barely mentioned it.
Speaker 2: This is the one mention of PAM this season. Yeah,
Speaker 2: well you get one a season.
Speaker 1: Right, that's the quota. So in the girls room, Kimmy
Speaker 1: is documenting her life swap experiment on a tape recorder.
Speaker 1: Love that tape recorder. Oh God. She announces what it's
Speaker 1: like to be DJ Tanner Day one. I'm about to
Speaker 1: discover the joy of having a little sister. Stephanie is
Speaker 1: minding her own business, brushing comet on the floor when
Speaker 1: Kimmy demands, hey, squirt, get me two donuts pronto. Steph
Speaker 1: rolls her eyes in your dreams. Kimmy reminds her, don't
Speaker 1: you get it, kid, I'm the big sister. I gave
Speaker 1: you a direct order, now snap to it. Stephanie tells
Speaker 1: her dog to excuse her before addressing Kimmy with the cold,
Speaker 1: hard truth, hibbler, let me tell you how this sister
Speaker 1: thing works. You're a pain in my neck, I'm a
Speaker 1: pain in yours. So if you want a donut, you
Speaker 1: march your little bird leg eggs down to the kitchen
Speaker 1: and get it yourself. Like the confidence.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was like, look, look, look like you have
Speaker 2: this all wrong. This isn't a one way street, my friend.
Speaker 1: Let me break it down. Yeah yeah. Gimmy just glares
Speaker 1: at her, and Steph eggs her on, go ahead, I'll
Speaker 1: time you go go, you're losing time.
Speaker 2: Gimmy falls for this and rushes out of the room
Speaker 2: at her command.
Speaker 1: Do you even remember like little kids into that's.
Speaker 2: Like go go, you're hurry, you're gonna oh my gosh,
Speaker 2: let's see if you can do in thirty seconds.
Speaker 1: And they walk out and be like, oh yeah it anyway, Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this was a brilliant little scene. Steph shakes her
Speaker 2: head in disbelief and goes back to pampering comment. She
Speaker 2: tells the dog there, goes one human. You're smarter than
Speaker 2: It's a great it's.
Speaker 1: A great little bit. You know, you're very great. Also,
Speaker 1: your outfit was adorable. I I you know, I have
Speaker 1: no words to my outfits are morphine into. I thought
Speaker 1: it was like the little onesie again, right, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: the little orange little orange onesie. Yeah yeah, that was
Speaker 1: that was that was okay, that was cute.
Speaker 2: But it didn't seem like a DJ outfit, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean. They didn't really bring mustard yellow and
Speaker 2: black right pads.
Speaker 1: Bike shorts with the lace at the bottom, not a
Speaker 1: shoulder pad or a blazer to be found.
Speaker 2: I know, I really wish they had dressed so they
Speaker 2: really leaned into Kimmy. Yeah, but I felt like they
Speaker 2: could have leaned in with DJ a little bit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's my That's one of my biggest complaints about
Speaker 1: this whole episode is that, like, I never got to
Speaker 1: do DJ things like Kandas did great with her oh
Speaker 1: lot Tannerito's and she was dressed like me a little
Speaker 1: bit later on, But yeah, I never got to really
Speaker 1: be DJ. I was just still Kimmy in the Tanner House.
Speaker 1: So that's all right. Next to Joey's room, Joey's back
Speaker 1: is towards us, and he's purposefully blocking our view of
Speaker 1: Jesse while hyping him up. It's macho, it's tough. It's
Speaker 1: that hard edge rock and roll image we've been looking for.
Speaker 1: He moves to the side so we can get a
Speaker 1: glimpse of Jesse head on, and we see a bright
Speaker 1: blonde wig that flows all the way down to his
Speaker 1: belly button. He is seeing very popular back then, they
Speaker 1: mentioned it, Nelson.
Speaker 2: Yes, he is seething as he tells Joey he hates it.
Speaker 2: Camera zooms in on his disgruntled face to prove how
Speaker 2: miserable he really is. Joey tries to persuade him, Come on, it's.
Speaker 1: Totally Nelson Nelson.
Speaker 2: For those of you who weren't born yet, they were
Speaker 2: twins and they had long blonde hair.
Speaker 1: That looked just like that, and they.
Speaker 2: Were like a rock and roll duo of the early
Speaker 2: nineties eighties.
Speaker 1: I love Nelson.
Speaker 2: Terry was was or is friends with them? Or ohy
Speaker 2: makeup artist Terry Groves. Yeah, especshietos everybody.
Speaker 1: So he puts a mirror Jesse's face, and this causes
Speaker 1: Jesse to scream at the sight of his own appearance.
Speaker 1: He immediately did he looks like, oh you know who?
Speaker 1: He looked like.
Speaker 2: He looked kind of like like he's trying to be
Speaker 2: legalists from uh.
Speaker 1: Lord of the Rings.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, elf with the long blond hair or the
Speaker 2: other one I forget what not Gandal, No, that's no,
Speaker 2: the I forget the other who plays him, but the
Speaker 2: long the very elfin sort of half.
Speaker 1: And yeah, it did. It was giving. It was giving
Speaker 1: a lot. John was was he was. He was making
Speaker 1: this joke work very much so so Jesse. Uh immediately
Speaker 1: ditches this wig and claims he looks like cousin it.
Speaker 1: He tries to spit ball some ideas to help Joey
Speaker 1: wish with the vision he's going for. He wants to
Speaker 1: be more like white Snake, rat and poison. I feel
Speaker 1: like there was a joke there a snake.
Speaker 2: A rat, and poison. There should have been a joke
Speaker 2: there didn't this episode long?
Speaker 1: Like, why did they have a bunch of jokes?
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: Jesse wants something that will grab the audience by the
Speaker 1: throat and just rip it apart. Joey is nodding his
Speaker 1: head and the gears are turning. He asked, what are
Speaker 1: those birds that swoop down that everyone is afraid of?
Speaker 1: Jesse asks pigeons, and Joey shakes his head. No scarier.
Speaker 1: It finally clicks and he exclaims, I got it. You
Speaker 1: are vulture. Jesse smirks, vulture. I like it. It's dark,
Speaker 1: it's vicious. It's kind of like a buzzard, but it's
Speaker 1: got better hair. Joey turns on his announcer voice and says,
Speaker 1: ladies and gentlemen, cover your heads, hide you're dead, and
Speaker 1: bandage your open wounds. Here comes Vulture. Joey makes weird
Speaker 1: squawky noises to bring it home, and Jesse looks at
Speaker 1: him funny. Joey encourages him to do it too, so
Speaker 1: he takes a whack at it, and after a few attempts,
Speaker 1: Jesse finally nails the Vulture pose. Oh yes, this, this
Speaker 1: was this was a nice rocking hole.
Speaker 2: It was you know, we were coming out of the
Speaker 2: like the eighties glam band sort of era and then.
Speaker 1: It yeah, it was the it was the Motley Crew.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's but Vulture, I mean, it's just it's very
Speaker 2: much like TMU, the TU.
Speaker 1: Version of whatever they're going for. Yeah, it's right.
Speaker 2: I mean, probably anything good has already been taken.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 2: So Vulture is also hold on, hold on, White Snake?
Speaker 2: Is White Snake really that good? It's it's just we're
Speaker 2: just used to it.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean. But if that's true, if they.
Speaker 2: Had been Vulture, that would sound normal and White Snake
Speaker 2: would sound ridiculous.
Speaker 1: Okay, they both are good point, it gets normalized over time,
Speaker 1: and so Vulture Vulture it is. Yes.
Speaker 2: Over In Michelle's classroom, Miss Wiltrout tells her students it's.
Speaker 1: Time to clean up their desks. Michelle's hand shoots into
Speaker 1: the air and she says, oh. Miss Wiltrout approaches her
Speaker 1: and Michelle explains, I got crayon on my desk. The
Speaker 1: teacher tells her that's all right, A little cleanser will
Speaker 1: clean it right up. Michelle lights up. Do you like
Speaker 1: to clean? Miss Wiltrout nods, Oh, yes. I always say
Speaker 1: a clean room is a happy room, and Michelle exclaims,
Speaker 1: My daddy says that too. I relate to this, Like
Speaker 1: I feel like I've never related to this as a kid,
Speaker 1: but now I'm like, yeah, it's a happy room. I
Speaker 1: don't feel mentally clear unless it's a organized room. I
Speaker 1: know you feel the same way.
Speaker 2: Oh, absolutely, it is a as a young person. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you're like, like, that's a lame right, picks up after themselves.
Speaker 2: I mean we've seen Felicity's room. Oh uh. So.
Speaker 1: The school bell rings and Miss Wiltrout applauds the kids
Speaker 1: for going an entire day without an injury.
Speaker 2: She's one of those signs, you know what I mean,
Speaker 2: Like zero days without it, like.
Speaker 1: A count a counting clock. The parents begin to flood
Speaker 1: into the classroom to pick up their children. Every single
Speaker 1: parent is a mom besides Dannie, who's there to pick
Speaker 1: up Michelle. Michelle grabs her dad's hands and exclaims, guess what.
Speaker 1: Guess what? Guess what, and Danny excitedly responds what. Michelle
Speaker 1: tells him that Miss wil Trout said a clean room
Speaker 1: is a happy room, and Danny admits that sounds like
Speaker 1: my kind of teacher. Michelle nods that is very good news.
Speaker 1: Then Miss will Trout walks up to Danny and shakes
Speaker 1: his hand. The two exchanged pleasantries, and Michelle declares, I'll
Speaker 1: let you to talk. The two adults don't think much
Speaker 1: of this, so Danny begins to make small talk. As
Speaker 1: Miss Wiltrout cleans up her classroom. He asks how Michelle
Speaker 1: is doing, and her teacher says she did very well
Speaker 1: in art class today. However, she points out that most
Speaker 1: of it wound up on her desk. Danny jokingly asks
Speaker 1: if he can bring the entire table home with him
Speaker 1: so he can hang it on the refrigerator, and meanwhile,
Speaker 1: Michelle sings songs to Teddy at the other end of
Speaker 1: the room. I've got a secret, and Teddy grins, what
Speaker 1: tell me? Michelle reveals my daddy and Miss will Trout
Speaker 1: are gonna fall in love. Teddy narrows his eyes. They
Speaker 1: are not, Michelle grins. They are too. I'm getting a
Speaker 1: new mommy, and she excitedly points to her teacher to
Speaker 1: prove it. Teddy questions, are teachers going to be your
Speaker 1: new mommy? And Michelle smirts. Watch this and she's going
Speaker 1: almost Senorita or whatever. It was just like Thisanny's hot
Speaker 1: for teachers. It was a few episodes. I guess it
Speaker 1: was last season he was dating the underage intern and
Speaker 1: now we've got the teacher again. I'm like, Danny has
Speaker 1: such a bad track record of dating, although, to be fair,
Speaker 1: he's actually not dating Miss will Trout. True, he's not
Speaker 1: trying to he's not trying to pick up on her
Speaker 1: like he did with very emotionally.
Speaker 2: So she's like, I know, you think for teachers, so
Speaker 2: they didn't work.
Speaker 1: She's analyzed him in her ecological ways, and she's like.
Speaker 2: Look, if you don't think the rumors spread about you
Speaker 2: and Senorita Mosley, everybody in the house knows cause we're
Speaker 2: making out in the living room.
Speaker 1: So yeah, Danny will live down. So many teachers that
Speaker 1: come to that the dance teacher, Senorita Moseley, like all
Speaker 1: the teachers, are just having meals at the Tanner house,
Speaker 1: so Michelle skips over to Danny and Miss Wiltrout, and naturally,
Speaker 1: Danny is in the middle of giving her some cleaning advice.
Speaker 1: Michelle butts in and asks Daddy, can Miss Wiltrout eat
Speaker 1: at our house.
Speaker 2: Both adults are a bit thrown by this, but Danny answers, sure,
Speaker 2: if Miss Wiltrout is looking for someplace to eat, we'd
Speaker 2: love to have her over. Michelle suggests how about lunch tomorrow,
Speaker 2: and her teacher admits lunch sounds lovely. Danny lightheartedly responds perfect,
Speaker 2: it's a date. Then Michelle pumps her fist with the
Speaker 2: victory and says, yes, oh boy, I'm miss bill Trout
Speaker 2: could have easily said no, I'm just saying.
Speaker 1: She but nobody had to agree with the five year old.
Speaker 2: But that's not we don't, says Goes.
Speaker 1: You know we've we learned this. She's ruling the house,
Speaker 1: she's ruling the classroom, she rules everywhere. Yes, so back
Speaker 1: in the.
Speaker 2: There a couple's counselor too. If it ever does work out, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: she does. Marriage and family therapy.
Speaker 1: So this is job security for Michelle.
Speaker 2: Basically, yeah, let's break down, Yeah, let's break down your relationship.
Speaker 1: So back in the girls room, Steph is in her
Speaker 1: pj's getting ready for bed when Kimmy bursts in, wearing
Speaker 1: a floral romper. Okay where orange? Yeah yeah, yeah this
Speaker 1: was tame. This, I mean compared comparatively speaking. It was
Speaker 1: no Mermaid, but it was no Mermaid but but yeah,
Speaker 1: I was definitely in a romper era. She tells her
Speaker 1: little sis, you know what I've learned since trading places
Speaker 1: with DJ. Stephanie rolls her eyes and makes her way
Speaker 1: over to DJ's closet as Kimmy continues, There's no one
Speaker 1: I'd rather be than me.
Speaker 2: I love Kimmy right, Like, hell yeah.
Speaker 1: Jimmy, you have skipped all.
Speaker 2: The high school and just been like, you know.
Speaker 1: What, I like being me?
Speaker 2: Yes? Why wasn't this celebrated more in the whole house?
Speaker 2: I was just the butt of all the jokes Off
Speaker 2: to you, Kimmy.
Speaker 1: This is revolutionary for a fourteen or fifteen year old
Speaker 1: whatever age Kimmy is in this season. Uh yeah, this
Speaker 1: is like this is what.
Speaker 2: Every Yes, this is why I love Kimmy, this should
Speaker 2: be celebrated.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, but there's only one other person. Kimmy would
Speaker 1: rather be Madonna because she's really rich. We see Stephanie
Speaker 1: get into the closet and shuts herself inside, while Kimmy
Speaker 1: continues to talk or maybe Julia Roberts. People say, I
Speaker 1: look just like her. Steph shouts from her hiding. But Kimmy,
Speaker 1: I'm in the closet. I've closed the door. Does that
Speaker 1: mean anything to you? Gimmy thinks for a moment and
Speaker 1: then realizes, yeah, I should talk louder. Then I like
Speaker 1: how you just you've just given up? You're like I
Speaker 1: was just so high.
Speaker 2: In the closet.
Speaker 1: So DJ walks in, wearing a very Gibbler style outfit. Yes,
Speaker 1: She sees Kimmy and says, ohl ah, Amiga, give me,
Speaker 1: examines her clothes and admits, Hey, I like your outfit,
Speaker 1: and DJ responds you should, it's yours, and then she
Speaker 1: heads over to her closet and opens the door. Steph
Speaker 1: lights up when she sees her older sister, DJ, you're back.
Speaker 1: She hops out of the closet and notices her change
Speaker 1: of clothes. What have the Gibblers done to you? DJ
Speaker 1: explains she's just trying to get the full Kimmy Gibbler experience,
Speaker 1: and then she channels her best friend as she tells Stephanie,
Speaker 1: now back off, squirt, I just came back to get
Speaker 1: my skates. Then DJ addresses Kimmy, you didn't tell me
Speaker 1: it was Roller Derby night at your house. It's me
Speaker 1: and your dad versus your mom and your brother in
Speaker 1: the ultimate grudge match race. Kimmy gives her some advice
Speaker 1: watch out for my mom. She hides an egg beater
Speaker 1: in her pants. What. I don't know how this would.
Speaker 2: I don't know how that relates to Roller Derby.
Speaker 1: But is it a weatbit and like an egg beater?
Speaker 1: Do you like a whisk or a like those? I
Speaker 1: think but that's a hand mixer mixer, right, So what's
Speaker 1: an egg? Is that different than an egg beater? That's
Speaker 1: how I beat my egg? Oh you know what? You
Speaker 1: know what an egg beater is.
Speaker 2: It's one of those old metal things that you manually
Speaker 2: did that with and it beat the eggs. We're talking
Speaker 2: some nineteen fifties, sixties like like this is old even
Speaker 2: for us. Yeah, yeah, this was this was this was
Speaker 2: one of the writers being like.
Speaker 1: An egg beater. Everyone knows like an egg beater.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it's they were metal things. And yeah, so
Speaker 2: I guess, I mean, I guess it's a weapon to
Speaker 2: beat off the competitors. I don't it's supposed to be weird?
Speaker 1: What nothing? What are there not? Competitors? Nothing? Didn't you do?
Speaker 1: Who's laughing in the chat?
Speaker 2: Man?
Speaker 1: He's laughing? Why is everyone laughing at me?
Speaker 2: Tell me you said you could use it to beat
Speaker 2: off competitors.
Speaker 1: Oh wait, that's wait what everyone is now? Everyone is
Speaker 1: now laughing in the chat.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry I heard it, and I was like, I
Speaker 2: can't let that go.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. My mind was still stuck on what don't
Speaker 1: I understand about the sport? Because I'm right, I'm not
Speaker 1: roller derby?
Speaker 2: Is you know anything? It's you it's fighting on skates? Right?
Speaker 1: Didn't you do this in a fuller episode or something?
Speaker 2: It was a roller derby with something other, some other
Speaker 2: type of I don't know something competition.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't remember. No, it was not roller derby.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I mean, I guess it would be a
Speaker 2: heavy metal object, would be an unexpected thing to have
Speaker 2: in your pants, so.
Speaker 1: Off to beat people off.
Speaker 2: It's yeah, it's you know, well, I guess there's no
Speaker 2: better place to put it than in your pants.
Speaker 1: If that's the case, I'm gonna blame my cold, my
Speaker 1: head cold.
Speaker 2: For how long it took me to understand why you
Speaker 2: all were laughing?
Speaker 1: Okay, back to roller Derby. Where the heck were we? Oh? Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: egg beaters and we're run the beating off of people.
Speaker 2: Here we go, hiding an egg beater in her pants?
Speaker 2: Got it?
Speaker 1: There we go? DJ laughs, got it? You know, Kimmy,
Speaker 1: it's kind of fun being you. DJ turns to leave
Speaker 1: and runs into Danny. On her way out. She says, hey,
Speaker 1: mister t pretty sharp sweater. She gets half way out
Speaker 1: the door before adding not, and that's all I can
Speaker 1: think of? Is that? Is that an egg beater in
Speaker 1: your pants? Or you just happy to see me? This
Speaker 1: could be our next shirt?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 1: Is that an egg beater in your vests?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: Boy, I need to I need to compose myself with
Speaker 1: my teeth.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I need to drink I mean a water, right,
Speaker 2: we need to, we need I'm parking, clarify that, I'm yeah.
Speaker 1: So at the Smash Club, Danny and Becky are in
Speaker 1: a very crowded space filled with rock and roll people.
Speaker 1: Danny even compliments someone on their dog collar accessory. Becky
Speaker 1: jokingly tells Danny, you really fit in that, mister Rogers
Speaker 1: sweater didn't give you away at all.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's true, you really think it really looks Yeah.
Speaker 1: Then a mop of long blonde hair comes walking out
Speaker 1: from behind the stage. A familiar surfer voice points to
Speaker 1: Danny and Becky, Hey, man, I know you dudes. The
Speaker 1: person flips back their hair and we see it's Joey.
Speaker 1: He excitedly tells them, wait till you see the special effects.
Speaker 1: I rigged. The guys from the record company are going
Speaker 1: to be totally stoked. They got a hell of a budget, right.
Speaker 2: They got a wig budget, they wig budget, got a
Speaker 2: special effects budget, they got a harness budget. They got
Speaker 2: smoke budgets. This is very, very high level. Joey comments
Speaker 2: on danny sweater. He calls it bogus, and Danny responds, thanks, man,
Speaker 2: it's machine washable. They fist bump while shouting all right,
Speaker 2: this is like the nerdiest exchange ever.
Speaker 1: Also, wasn't bogus like a bad thing? I don't remember.
Speaker 2: I was trying to remember, like that bogus, like bogus
Speaker 2: is usually like that's ridiculous, that's bogus. Yeah, maybe I
Speaker 2: felt like that's what he was saying. Maybe, well it
Speaker 2: was Maybe that's the point.
Speaker 1: It was thirty years to get that joke. Yes, Danny
Speaker 1: takes it as a compliment and adds on, oh and
Speaker 1: it's machine washable.
Speaker 2: Got it.
Speaker 1: If you have to explain it, it loses something. Anyways,
Speaker 1: the lights begin to dim, Joey tells them he has
Speaker 1: to go start the show. He says peace Hippies to
Speaker 1: his friends, and Becky responds peace baby. Over the speakers.
Speaker 1: We hear the Smash Club presents the world premiere of Vulture,
Speaker 1: and then a spotlight shines on Jesse, who's dressed in
Speaker 1: a black leather jumpsuit with fringes on the arms to
Speaker 1: make it look like he has wings. He's doing his
Speaker 1: Vulture pose while suspended in the air. A fog looking
Speaker 1: like a Jeans Simmons. Yeah, that's exactly the tongue and everything. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he totally did.
Speaker 2: A fog machine fills the stage before we hear Jesse
Speaker 2: count the band in using a raspy rocker voice as
Speaker 2: they begin the song two small explosions happen on stage,
Speaker 2: which really gets the crowd riled up right pirate technics, Yeah,
Speaker 2: this is impressive.
Speaker 1: Jesse is dangling just an inch above the stage, but
Speaker 1: he can't put his feet directly on the floor. He's stuck.
Speaker 1: Yells a Joey to put him down, but Joey can't.
Speaker 1: He tells Jesse to sing and go along with it
Speaker 1: while he fixes it. Jesse begins I Want a Rock,
Speaker 1: and his band echoes the lyrics after him. As Jesse
Speaker 1: gets lifted into the air again, he ditches the real
Speaker 1: lyrics and shouts Joey, get me down, and the band
Speaker 1: echoes those lyrics too. Finally, Joey runs onto the stage
Speaker 1: and tries to pull Jesse down himself. Joey asks one
Speaker 1: of the guitarists to hold Jesse for a second. Uncle
Speaker 1: Gary Griffin, Yeah, Uncle Gary Griffin, Yeah. Read the red
Speaker 1: headed ripper, Gary Gibler, Yeah, yeah, Gary Gibler, Yes. But
Speaker 1: Gary Gibler reminds him he's trying to play. He pushes
Speaker 1: Jesse toward the crowd, and Jesse goes flying directly over them.
Speaker 2: He goes back and forth and Becky shouts from the
Speaker 2: crowd be careful sweetheart.
Speaker 1: Joey tells him to keep singing. They love him. Jesse
Speaker 1: snatches the long blonde wig from his head as he
Speaker 1: soars back into the crowd once more. Then we get
Speaker 1: a quick POV shot from Jesse as he's swinging over
Speaker 1: the crowd of people.
Speaker 2: I just want I was like, I I wasn't there
Speaker 2: when they shot this, but I was like, how did
Speaker 2: we do this?
Speaker 1: How did we do this?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I don't did they just attach it? I guess that.
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean, cameras weren't small back and handheld
Speaker 1: wasn't I mean that wasn't small either. No, I don't know.
Speaker 2: How did they have like a not a and they
Speaker 2: didn't even have steady cams back?
Speaker 1: I don't know how they did this, but that made
Speaker 1: it equally or even more impressive. And then I was afraid,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, are we going to see like the
Speaker 1: edge of the stage, like I kept like it went
Speaker 1: way out there? So where are we?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: The POV shot. The music stops and Jesse continues to
Speaker 1: swing back and forth in dead silence. Becky shouts, way
Speaker 1: to go, sweetheart. Well, Danny holds up a lighter for him.
Speaker 1: Jesse just laughs at the situation and jokes Vulture lives,
Speaker 1: and that was a thing that we did, and that
Speaker 1: was Vulture. That was Vulture's short lived career. Back in
Speaker 1: the kitchen, Joey is trying to assure Jesse that the
Speaker 1: Vulture performance was great. He even claims the firemen, we're
Speaker 1: happy to get him down after Oh, I bet they were.
Speaker 2: It's going to go to their log book of stupid
Speaker 2: things that they you know what I mean, what's the
Speaker 2: most ridiculous things that you did this week? Cat, you're
Speaker 2: in a fringy jacket down from a ceiling a small club.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, they were talking crap about that after
Speaker 1: they were done. Yeah. Jesse winces in pain as he
Speaker 1: walks across the floor bow legged. He shouts in Joey's face,
Speaker 1: Thanks to you, I got rock and Roll's biggest wedgie.
Speaker 1: Joey harnesses are not comfortable. I don't blame him for this.
Speaker 1: I can't.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it feels dangerously close. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And when you were in a lot of harms and
Speaker 1: you don't even have, Joey offers you don't want to fly,
Speaker 1: you can always burrow up from the stage and be
Speaker 1: the gopher. He imitates a gopher, and Jesse just glares
Speaker 1: at him. He question the gopher, Oh, there's a real
Speaker 1: tough image, Joey counters, ask any Gardner who he fears
Speaker 1: the most. And if you remember back to the movie
Speaker 1: Caddie Shack, you know, and then he begins a Carl
Speaker 1: Spackler impression. Yes, a Carl Spackler slash Bill Murray, Bill Murray. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he did the voice for Ghostbusters and stuff. Right, Oh, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: that's right, he did.
Speaker 1: He's very good at it, very good at I mean.
Speaker 2: And to be fair, if I would have gone with
Speaker 2: a naked mole rat, if we're going for burrowing creatures, terrifying,
Speaker 2: really terrifying. Yeah, so if you're gonna find then a gopher, well,
Speaker 2: have you ever seen a naked mole rat?
Speaker 1: I haven't. No, Well you're gonna have to google that.
Speaker 2: I'm afraid they're blind, they got weird teeth, they do
Speaker 2: they wreck your lawn, That's what I want to know,
Speaker 2: because we got you know, I don't. Yeah, but they're like,
Speaker 2: you know, they're they're moles. They did they destroy Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna be weirdly terrifying. I feel like I'm gonna
Speaker 2: regret googling naked mole rat, but I'm going to as
Speaker 2: soon as we're done here. Uh so, Jesse laughs, He
Speaker 2: shakes his head.
Speaker 1: This whole thing was just a big mistake. I'm going
Speaker 1: back to being Jesse and the Rippers. I'm gonna find.
Speaker 2: Some like the band that you were when you had
Speaker 2: a tour two weeks ago.
Speaker 1: Right there was this was like, did the Rippers have
Speaker 1: any input into this vulture transition?
Speaker 2: Like this is just no, No, it's not a democracy.
Speaker 1: They've learned.
Speaker 2: They've learn Jesse and the Rippers right, and we've seen
Speaker 2: the Rippers are replaceable. They cycle in and out, so
Speaker 2: cycle in and out.
Speaker 1: Yep uh, He says, I'm gonna just find some record
Speaker 1: company out there who wants me for me, Joey suggests,
Speaker 1: and if not, you can always make a living plain
Speaker 1: Peter Pan. Jesse gives him a death stare and holds
Speaker 1: up a finger before lunging at him. Joey quickly runs away,
Speaker 1: and Jesse can't catch him because of his sore limbs.
Speaker 1: Did somebody just put it? Yes, it's a picture.
Speaker 2: Rachel just posted a picture of a naked mole rat.
Speaker 1: I can't look Yeah, look at it.
Speaker 2: I can't, it says potentially it says potential security issue detected. No,
Speaker 2: it's fine, it'll give you a virus on your computer.
Speaker 2: But it's totally worth it, totally worth that.
Speaker 1: Okay, how do.
Speaker 2: I I told you it looks like a body part.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it does.
Speaker 2: It like if it had teeth and like a nose.
Speaker 1: And that's really that is just want Yeah, okay. Well
Speaker 1: we're also known as a sand puppy. Yeah, that's just okay.
Speaker 1: I that's so gross. I don't know whether say thank
Speaker 1: you or to hate you for that, but that.
Speaker 2: Was I'm just saying, if you're going for scary ground
Speaker 2: dwelling things, that or a gopher, gophers are cute compared
Speaker 2: to that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, they're just yeah. Okay, naked roll map
Speaker 1: mole rat that is the that is.
Speaker 2: Naked roll mat. A naked roll mat is some sort
Speaker 2: of hot yoga I think. Yeah, I feel delirious.
Speaker 1: Okay, moving right along. We're in the living room. Michelle
Speaker 1: is sitting in a chair holding a cup of wild
Speaker 1: flowers when the doorbell rings. She looks at her dad,
Speaker 1: who is leisurely walking down the stairs, and says, my
Speaker 1: teacher is here. Hurry up. He approaches Michelle, who gives
Speaker 1: him the cup of flowers to seal the deal. She
Speaker 1: reminds him that women love flowers. Danny takes a cup
Speaker 1: and admits that's very sweet of her. He begins to
Speaker 1: walk toward the door, but Michelle shouts wait a minute.
Speaker 1: She waves him back over and adjusts his hair. After
Speaker 1: she's done, she looks him over and says, you look
Speaker 1: very handsome. Danny's a bit confused as he says, well,
Speaker 1: thank you very much. As he makes his way over
Speaker 1: to the door again, Michelle advises be nice and don't
Speaker 1: talk about yourself. Danny is immediately I do not talk
Speaker 1: about myself, and then he pauses and admits, okay, well
Speaker 1: maybe I do, but that's because when I was five
Speaker 1: I didn't really have any friends.
Speaker 2: Michelle a very bob moment too, such a well, I
Speaker 2: mean it's sort of a thing, and you're like, oh.
Speaker 1: Boy, here we go. That's such a bob thing. Michelle
Speaker 1: cuts some offenses Daddy because he's proving her point, and
Speaker 1: so he sighs, Okay, you're right, I'll do my best.
Speaker 1: Danny opens the door and Miss Wiltrout appears wearing a
Speaker 1: royal blue suit jacket with a humong his shoulder pads,
Speaker 1: and a skirt to match. Quite the outfit.
Speaker 2: This is she dresses up for lunch at her student's house, which,
Speaker 2: you know. I don't know what's in this for Miss Wiltrout.
Speaker 2: Maybe she's just really excited for someone to make her lunch.
Speaker 2: But maybe she's just being night. Maybe she's a people pleaser.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Why didn't she agree to this? I
Speaker 1: don't know. Maybe she has a crush on Danny. Maybe
Speaker 1: it's maybe you know what I mean, like maybe she
Speaker 1: was like, oh, okay, hey, I'll go for it, and then.
Speaker 2: Dan She's like, wow, no, God, of course not, that's
Speaker 2: so weird.
Speaker 1: Yeah, poor miss Wiltrout. She shakes Danny's hand and says
Speaker 1: hello to Michelle, and Michelle gives her a little wave
Speaker 1: in response. Then Danny hands over the cup of flowers
Speaker 1: and Miss Wiltrout gasps. Dandy lyons my favorite. Michelle chimes in,
Speaker 1: Daddy is the nicest man in the whole world. Danny gushes, Oh,
Speaker 1: some people may think I'm the cleanest. In fact, in
Speaker 1: high school I founded the FJA Future Janitors of America.
Speaker 1: Michelle loudly clears her throat to send a signal, and
Speaker 1: Danny gets the hint and pivots, well, enough about me,
Speaker 1: why don't we go eat some lunch. Michelle runs in
Speaker 1: between the adults and grabs each of their hands before
Speaker 1: leading them to the kitchen. Then she stops abruptly and
Speaker 1: connects Danny and missus Wiltrout's hands together. She runs in
Speaker 1: front of them and says, this way, please, wouldn't this
Speaker 1: be the red flag moment? Right here? I was just say.
Speaker 1: Nobody was like, why we want Michelle? Yeah? So they
Speaker 1: continue holding hands as they follow Michelle into the kitchen,
Speaker 1: like this is where I'd be like, let's stop for
Speaker 1: a minute and have a conversation.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, what's happening, Michelle go on through her little mind.
Speaker 2: There Michelle, so in the kitchen, then the show would
Speaker 2: be six minutes too.
Speaker 1: Short, right, we have to fill all twenty two minutes.
Speaker 1: So Danny notices that Michelle has set the kitchen table
Speaker 1: all by herself. Miss Wiltrout admits it looks very pretty,
Speaker 1: and then Michelle proceeds to set down half of a
Speaker 1: peanut butter and jelly sandwich on each of their plates.
Speaker 1: She sadly admits there's no candles because I can't play
Speaker 1: with matches. They laugh and Danny pulls out Miss Wiltrout's
Speaker 1: seat for her. Michelle boasts isn't he a gentleman and
Speaker 1: Miss Wiltrout nods yes. He gets a gold star for
Speaker 1: good manners. Danny realizes that Michelle also made lunch all
Speaker 1: by herself. She nods and tells them their lunch menu.
Speaker 1: We have peanut butter and jelly and milk. Danny points
Speaker 1: out that there's only one glass of milk for them,
Speaker 1: and Michelle grins as she pulls two straws out of
Speaker 1: her pocket and places them in the glass. I know,
Speaker 1: She says, now you can share. Have a nice lunch,
Speaker 1: and she begins to walk away. Danny asks, aren't you
Speaker 1: going to eat with us? And Michelle insists you need
Speaker 1: to be alone. Then she presses play on her kiddie
Speaker 1: radio and gives her dad an okay signal with her hands.
Speaker 1: Danny and missus Wiltrout glance at each other in shock.
Speaker 1: Danny frantically runs to turn off the music and awkwardly admits,
Speaker 1: does she sure wit to a lot of trouble for
Speaker 1: this mystery? What could possibly be happening. What is happening?
Speaker 1: Miss Wiltrout responds, you know, she's doing really well in school.
Speaker 1: You don't need to suck up like this. Danny insists,
Speaker 1: we Tanners are not suck ups. Goodie two shoes maybe,
Speaker 1: but not suck ups. Miss will Trout suggests maybe she
Speaker 1: just wants us to be very good friends. Danny shrugs,
Speaker 1: I guess, and then he gestures to the food and
Speaker 1: says bone appetite on cue. Michelle peeks her head through
Speaker 1: the door and asks, are you in love yet? Ah?
Speaker 1: There it is. Danny begins choking on his food at
Speaker 1: the sound of this. Miss will Trout springs into action
Speaker 1: to help, and once he's okay, she pats him on
Speaker 1: the head and calls him a good boy with putting
Speaker 1: his arms in the air. Was that put your arms up?
Speaker 1: I'm like, does that actually do anything? We're we just doing?
Speaker 1: I don't know. Does that open up the I don't
Speaker 1: know this, sophig I don't know, but I don't know.
Speaker 1: I've never actually tried them. So Danny is in a
Speaker 1: disbelief we're just friends. So Michelle suggests, then you better
Speaker 1: start kissing. Danny's eyes widen further your teacher and I
Speaker 1: are not going to kiss and we're not going to
Speaker 1: fall in love. He learned that lesson before. Michelle pau
Speaker 1: now kissing teachers does not know. Oh, not a good idea, Danny.
Speaker 1: Michelle is pouting now I'll never get a new mommy,
Speaker 1: and she sadly walks away. Danny apologizes to Miss Wiltrout,
Speaker 1: admitting he had no idea. This is what Michelle had
Speaker 1: in mind. He excuses himself so he can go talk
Speaker 1: to her, and Miss Wiltrout is very understanding. As Danny
Speaker 1: hurries away, Miss Wiltrout sighs at the heartbreaking situation. Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm supprised she's.
Speaker 2: Just because she was like, yeah, goes my shot there.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: She's like, I don't get a nice lunch anymore. I
Speaker 1: don't get my chance. Danny Tanner.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Up in Michelle's room, Michelle is slumped on her bed
Speaker 1: when Danny knocks on the door. She sadly says come in,
Speaker 1: and Danny enters. He takes a seat in front of
Speaker 1: her and says, I think we have to talk, and
Speaker 1: Michelle agrees, I think we'd better. He sighs, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: you went to so much trouble today, and Michelle admits
Speaker 1: I wish I had a mommy. Danny tells her, I
Speaker 1: know you don't remember, but you had a wonderful mommy
Speaker 1: and she loved you very very much. Michelle frowns, it's
Speaker 1: not fair all the other kids have mommies, and Danny responds,
Speaker 1: I know it may seem like everybody else has a mommy,
Speaker 1: but the truth is some people just have a mommy,
Speaker 1: or they just have a daddy, or a grandma or
Speaker 1: a grandpa, or an aunt and uncle. There's all different
Speaker 1: kinds of families, and Michelle asks, really, and Danny nods.
Speaker 1: What makes a family is when you have people who
Speaker 1: take care of one another and love each other. You
Speaker 1: have a very special family. Danny names all of the
Speaker 1: special family members Michelle has and she giggles, I bet
Speaker 1: nobody in school has a Joey. Danny laughs and tells
Speaker 1: her that's a pretty safe bet. He admits that in
Speaker 1: a way, Michelle and her sisters are pretty lucky because
Speaker 1: they have four people who love them very very much.
Speaker 1: Michelle grins, I love you very very much. She gives
Speaker 1: her dad a big hug and he kisses her on
Speaker 1: the cheek, telling Michelle that he loves her too. Then
Speaker 1: he picks her up and says, come on, let's go
Speaker 1: have lunch with your teacher. But Michelle wonders, will I
Speaker 1: ever get a new mommy? Danny smiles, well, I hope, so,
Speaker 1: she smirks, have you met the school nurse? She's very hot?
Speaker 1: Danny's interest is piqued. Yes, the five year old? Really?
Speaker 1: How hot is she? What color hair does she have?
Speaker 1: Michelle exclaims hot, pink, And that's our show.
Speaker 2: Like this was going so well, This was going so well,
Speaker 2: going so well. On the plane and Michelle starts talking
Speaker 2: about how hot the nurse is.
Speaker 1: Right, I'm just like, gosh.
Speaker 2: No, But I will say this scene, though, is so
Speaker 2: oh so sweet. I can't tell you how many people
Speaker 2: have told me that this episode really made an impact
Speaker 2: on them, that like they were growing up in a
Speaker 2: house that was an alternative family or was you know,
Speaker 2: a LGBTQ family or whatever. Yeah, and so it didn't
Speaker 2: look like what they everyone thought it was supposed to.
Speaker 2: And how this episode and the Tanner family and the
Speaker 2: fact that they were very clear that a family is
Speaker 2: about a group of people that love each other, whether
Speaker 2: or not they're blood related, you know, right, And I
Speaker 2: love that I had that because that was always the
Speaker 2: biggest message of full houses, like as long as you love.
Speaker 1: Each other, you get you know, your family. This was
Speaker 1: revolutionary in nineteen ninety one and a lot of people
Speaker 1: could relate to that because they're like, my family doesn't
Speaker 1: look like the traditional mom and a dad or twenty
Speaker 1: five kids. Most families, A lot of families don't look
Speaker 1: like that at all, So like this was, yeah, this
Speaker 1: was a great message and why so many people loved
Speaker 1: the Tanners. Yeah, you know, they didn't look like other
Speaker 1: sitcom families, but they loved each other so much. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I love Yeah. Besides the last few lines, I love
Speaker 1: this scene, right, so very very cute, great lesson.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, so yeah that was that was That was
Speaker 2: a cute one. I liked this and yeah it was.
Speaker 2: There was you know, kind of a little sad moment
Speaker 2: when she's like I need a mommy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, no, that was. This was a great storyline.
Speaker 1: It was age appropriate for Michelle to be wondering how
Speaker 1: does love work? How does right?
Speaker 2: You just should lunch and things go well and then
Speaker 2: you're in love, right, right, that's five year old for you.
Speaker 1: That's that. They just break it down as simple as possible.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 2: So yeah, that was sweet. I felt like there were
Speaker 2: a few too many storylines a B in a C storyline.
Speaker 1: I'm like this, this is a little too much. So yeah,
Speaker 1: it did feel like a lot was going on. There
Speaker 1: was a lot going on, So I wish they had
Speaker 1: just I don't know.
Speaker 2: We had a shadows seeing the mom, we had Vulture.
Speaker 1: We had Kimmy, DJ and DJ. Yeah, so there was
Speaker 1: there was a lot there and that's I wish Again
Speaker 1: I said this earlier, but I wish DJ and Kimmy.
Speaker 1: I wish we had I'd gotten more of a chance
Speaker 1: to act like DJ and there would have been more
Speaker 1: funny bits in there. But that's what I feel like.
Speaker 2: Vulture could have been another movie, different episode. Yeah, I agree,
Speaker 2: then we might have had more Vulture, And I don't
Speaker 2: know that anyone needed that.
Speaker 1: That was one scene was enough. One scene of Vulture
Speaker 1: was plenty. Uh. Yeah, that was quite the production for
Speaker 1: a for a B or C storyline. They had a
Speaker 1: lot of special effects, put a lot of money out
Speaker 1: of that, so that was it was quite a bit.
Speaker 2: Vulture was no no cheap gig, no at all.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so do you have any uh? Did you have
Speaker 1: any everywhere you look?
Speaker 2: So I was looking in the audience and I didn't
Speaker 2: have no an audio for the smash club, and I
Speaker 2: didn't see anybody. Weren't going to be extras in the
Speaker 2: smash club the Vulture, right, our moms with like just
Speaker 2: black makeup on and like rock and roll leather jackets.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I didn't see that. No, I didn't notice.
Speaker 1: I thought. At one point I.
Speaker 2: Saw my Mark Sandrowski as Jesse's POV. He was flying
Speaker 2: over the audience. Oh yeah, saw Mark Sandrowski kind of
Speaker 2: working the the little DJ booth or what of the
Speaker 2: music the booth?
Speaker 1: But maybe not. It was so quick I couldn't really tell.
Speaker 1: But I don't know. I don't think that.
Speaker 2: I don't think he would have been working the sound
Speaker 2: booth because on a day when you have extras, your
Speaker 2: second ad is the one that's.
Speaker 1: He's ranked right, right, So maybe that wasn't him. Now,
Speaker 1: even Michelle's classroom when the moms come in, I didn't
Speaker 1: recognize any of these people. I didn't either. I didn't either,
Speaker 1: So I I am everywhere you look less tonight. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: me too. I didn't. Uh, there's there's nothing nothing there. No,
Speaker 1: does the fan Auritos have any everywhere he looks if
Speaker 1: you've noticed anything? I didn't know.
Speaker 2: Ye I didn't notice anything on the wall that change,
Speaker 2: you know, none of that. Yep.
Speaker 1: But there was a lot going on.
Speaker 2: There were a lot of storylines, storyline There was a
Speaker 2: lot going on. We had people flying, we had vultures,
Speaker 2: we had rompers, had like where's Waldo, Danny make it
Speaker 2: out with another teacher or trying to or what have you?
Speaker 1: You know, Danny.
Speaker 2: But no, this was a really cute episode and I love, love,
Speaker 2: love this message because it really gets to the heart
Speaker 2: of what full House was about. So, yeah, it's too
Speaker 2: loved it, loved it. Yeah, And so a next episode
Speaker 2: is season five, episode three, Take my Sister Please.
Speaker 1: I can't remember what that one is, but you is
Speaker 1: that who wants to get rid of?
Speaker 2: Who?
Speaker 1: Do you want to get rid of? Michelle? Or does
Speaker 1: want to get ridybody? Answer rid of me?
Speaker 2: Because that's usually the middle child's middle child. Yeah, we'll
Speaker 2: see you find out next time on how rude Sanato's
Speaker 2: So stay tuned, fan of Ritos and make sure that
Speaker 2: you were liking and subscribing to the podcast wherever you're
Speaker 2: listening to it so that you can get those new
Speaker 2: episodes like take My Sister Please, you can get them
Speaker 2: as soon as.
Speaker 1: They come out. And uh and we.
Speaker 2: Love you guys, thank you so much for all of
Speaker 2: the amazing comments and questions and all.
Speaker 1: The stuff that we get.
Speaker 2: If you want to follow us on Instagram, you can
Speaker 2: find us at how Red podcast, or you can send
Speaker 2: us an email at how Rude Tana Rito's at gmail
Speaker 2: dot com.
Speaker 1: Uh. And you can also.
Speaker 2: Check out our merch store haard merch dot com. We've
Speaker 2: got some fun shirts on there, and I don't, I don't.
Speaker 2: We don't have the special edition ones anymore.
Speaker 1: No, we don't have them. We don't have the new
Speaker 1: ones up yet. But we don't have the new ones up.
Speaker 1: You'll add the egg beater ad Yeah, the egg beater
Speaker 1: in your pants? I mean, don't actually add an egg
Speaker 1: beater to your pants. That sounds uncomfortable anyway. Yeah, head
Speaker 1: over to the mert shop and check it out. Uh.
Speaker 1: And that's it.
Speaker 2: And in the meantime, you guys, remember the world is small,
Speaker 2: but the house and your pants are full of egg beaters. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so many egg beaters.
Speaker 1: Beat off the competition.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah, that's what you do with them. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's just everyone everyone. That's what they're ford beating off
Speaker 2: the competition in worlder deby duh.
Speaker 1: Should be the tagline for this.
Speaker 2: Shown a fash