WEBVTT - This One’s a Real Nail Biter 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:01.359 Hello, gorgeous. 0:00:01.400 --> 0:00:02.160 It's Lala Kent. 0:00:02.560 --> 0:00:04.600 Welcome to Untraditionally Lala. 0:00:05.440 --> 0:00:08.479 Hey Vibbs is yours truly, Laala Kent, Welcome to the 0:00:08.560 --> 0:00:11.320 bonus episode of Untraditionally La La. 0:00:11.480 --> 0:00:13.480 Hello, Easton Burningham? How are we doing? 0:00:13.640 --> 0:00:16.800 Hello? I'm great, I'm great. I'm injured. I'm great. 0:00:18.120 --> 0:00:20.119 I'm great. I'm injured. What happened? 0:00:20.560 --> 0:00:24.040 Shoulder, thigh, you name it? I got it. 0:00:25.040 --> 0:00:27.760 I mean, is that just from your gay softball league 0:00:27.760 --> 0:00:29.520 that you play in those injuries? 0:00:30.600 --> 0:00:31.800 Yeah, the road. 0:00:31.920 --> 0:00:35.559 The shoulder is kind of a compound of that golf. 0:00:35.680 --> 0:00:38.559 And I love sleeping on my side so that. 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:40.839 You can get I knew you could get wrinkles on 0:00:40.880 --> 0:00:42.559 your face from sleeping on your side. 0:00:42.720 --> 0:00:45.200 I don't care about that. I like a good night's sleep. 0:00:45.920 --> 0:00:48.520 I can dislocate my shoulder sleeping on my side. 0:00:48.560 --> 0:00:50.280 Well, like I just am a side sleeper. 0:00:50.320 --> 0:00:52.400 So for like, over the years, like it just keeps 0:00:52.440 --> 0:00:57.000 pulling in, like weakening limbs. From what I was told 0:00:57.120 --> 0:01:00.160 yesterday when they took my. 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:03.440 Blood, you did PRP in your shoulder. 0:01:04.000 --> 0:01:06.640 So I've only done PRP on my face, which is 0:01:07.840 --> 0:01:10.720 why I'm so concerned about the now shoulder thing. Being 0:01:10.760 --> 0:01:15.480 a side sleeper because I've acted actively stopped or tried 0:01:15.480 --> 0:01:19.680 to stop sleeping on my side to avoid getting wrinkles. 0:01:20.040 --> 0:01:22.600 And I woke up this morning in full panic because 0:01:22.640 --> 0:01:25.800 I had a. 0:01:24.680 --> 0:01:29.520 Crease going in the opposite direction, which. 0:01:29.319 --> 0:01:32.080 Meant that my face was pushed against the pillow for 0:01:32.160 --> 0:01:35.000 an extended period of time causing a wrinkle. That if 0:01:35.000 --> 0:01:38.920 that happens on a regular basis, it will stay that way, 0:01:39.319 --> 0:01:40.560 and I'm not okay with that? 0:01:41.000 --> 0:01:42.440 Can I tell you something wild? 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:46.800 Nikki Garcia, we had her on Unlikely an Unlikely Affair, 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:48.080 the podcast I have with Amber. 0:01:48.880 --> 0:01:50.040 We were talking about. 0:01:49.800 --> 0:01:52.920 How younger men they don't understand the aging process and 0:01:52.960 --> 0:01:54.800 the wrinkles and the things that happened to your body. 0:01:54.840 --> 0:01:56.440 And I was like, I can't be with someone who 0:01:56.480 --> 0:01:59.920 doesn't know what crows speed are the crows speed are. 0:02:00.120 --> 0:02:02.320 Yet it started giving me anxiety, which is what this 0:02:02.440 --> 0:02:03.360 bonus is all about. 0:02:03.400 --> 0:02:04.040 Is anxiety. 0:02:04.040 --> 0:02:07.120 By the way, I know that I get that, but 0:02:07.200 --> 0:02:10.720 that's where I'm saying, like I sleeping. If I don't 0:02:10.720 --> 0:02:13.799 sleep well, my day is fulling of anxiety. And now 0:02:13.840 --> 0:02:17.080 I'm putting that together like if I don't have a 0:02:17.120 --> 0:02:19.400 good night sleep, I wake up a little anxious, like 0:02:19.480 --> 0:02:21.680 my breath work through the night when I was sleeping 0:02:21.840 --> 0:02:25.720 wasn't where it was supposed to be. And I wake 0:02:25.800 --> 0:02:29.239 up and I feel like I don't look at like wrinkles. 0:02:29.919 --> 0:02:35.520 I sleep so terribly like arm wise placement of limbs 0:02:35.600 --> 0:02:37.799 that I wake up and instead of wrinkles in that, 0:02:37.919 --> 0:02:40.600 I'm thinking, why does this part of my body hurt? Now? 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:40.919 Right? 0:02:41.400 --> 0:02:44.400 That's called the aide's like the lower back. 0:02:44.440 --> 0:02:46.320 When I wake up, I'm like, well, that's a little tight, 0:02:46.360 --> 0:02:48.959 I mean a little bar No. 0:02:48.960 --> 0:02:49.280 It is. 0:02:49.360 --> 0:02:51.720 It's a real thing. And it starts kicking in your thirties. 0:02:51.760 --> 0:02:57.200 Give anxiety because now how does one sleep. 0:02:57.160 --> 0:02:57.760 On your back? 0:02:57.800 --> 0:03:03.639 And it's speaking of anxiety, so obviously I feel like anxiety. 0:03:04.280 --> 0:03:06.600 I don't know if it's just because people are starting 0:03:06.639 --> 0:03:09.320 to talk about it more because everyone has a platform 0:03:09.440 --> 0:03:13.119 to talk about it, or if everyone has always struggled 0:03:13.160 --> 0:03:20.040 with anxiety for me. For me, I think that everyone's 0:03:20.120 --> 0:03:24.640 anxiety has kicked in because we have so much access 0:03:24.680 --> 0:03:27.880 to everything all the time, whether it's what's going on 0:03:27.960 --> 0:03:30.520 in the world, what's going on next door. 0:03:31.120 --> 0:03:35.440 Then you add in the like the vanity portion of it, 0:03:35.520 --> 0:03:35.800 and you. 0:03:35.760 --> 0:03:38.440 See all of these people like I saw yesterday, Kylie 0:03:38.520 --> 0:03:41.800 Jenner actually crushed it in that movie with Charlie x 0:03:41.960 --> 0:03:45.160 c X and Kylie plays herself, but actually that is 0:03:45.240 --> 0:03:45.920 kind of hard to do. 0:03:46.920 --> 0:03:49.080 When they're like, play yourself, but here's a script. 0:03:48.760 --> 0:03:51.840 To follow, you're like, wait a minute, hold on, Kylie 0:03:51.920 --> 0:03:52.960 Jenner pretty much ate. 0:03:53.760 --> 0:03:55.560 All I could focus on, though, was the fact that 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:57.240 she too has had two kids. 0:03:58.240 --> 0:04:01.000 Her boobs look normal, granted she had a boot job, 0:04:01.120 --> 0:04:04.760 Her jawline is impeccable, her whole face, her hair, all 0:04:04.800 --> 0:04:06.560 of it. Now, it's not lost on me that she 0:04:06.600 --> 0:04:08.880 has access to everything on the plan. 0:04:09.160 --> 0:04:12.160 You don't say, but go look at her in twenty twelve. 0:04:12.560 --> 0:04:15.360 You sit, We're not shading anybody. 0:04:15.480 --> 0:04:16.440 No, do what you want. 0:04:16.680 --> 0:04:20.120 Then, all I'm saying is you can't compare her looks 0:04:20.160 --> 0:04:23.000 to what anyone looks like because her looks are artificial. 0:04:23.440 --> 0:04:26.279 So yeah, but okay, well that brings me to my 0:04:26.320 --> 0:04:29.800 point of anxiety. You start looking and you're like, oh 0:04:29.880 --> 0:04:33.880 my god, Like I already called doctor Diamond and said, 0:04:33.880 --> 0:04:36.159 like we got to fix this jaw, Like I'm coming 0:04:36.200 --> 0:04:41.440 in April eighteenth, No, April fifteenth, Like you got to carve. 0:04:41.360 --> 0:04:43.560 Me out, buddy. 0:04:43.600 --> 0:04:45.160 We have different anxieties. 0:04:45.320 --> 0:04:46.039 We certainly do. 0:04:46.200 --> 0:04:50.520 So Anyway, Alex's earl came out saying that there's like 0:04:50.760 --> 0:04:54.480 a stigma around anxiety medication. And she goes on to 0:04:54.520 --> 0:04:57.200 say that she has been medicated since the age of fourteen. 0:04:57.440 --> 0:05:00.960 She's off of it, right, So. 0:05:00.800 --> 0:05:03.560 This is a quote she did an article, an interview 0:05:03.600 --> 0:05:06.920 with people. It can feel really scary, and there feels 0:05:07.480 --> 0:05:10.240 and there feels like there's like a stigma around it 0:05:10.360 --> 0:05:12.680 at times. But honestly, a lot of my friends, a 0:05:12.680 --> 0:05:16.000 lot of people I know, are also on medication for 0:05:16.000 --> 0:05:17.960 anxiety depression OCD, whatever it is. 0:05:19.200 --> 0:05:21.560 I don't know if she's still medicated. 0:05:21.800 --> 0:05:22.760 Can I say one thing? 0:05:23.960 --> 0:05:28.840 Yeah, after like even my relapse going on seven months, 0:05:28.920 --> 0:05:31.200 right or we're like six and a half going on 0:05:31.279 --> 0:05:37.960 seven I was on anti anxiety and anti depression, and 0:05:38.040 --> 0:05:41.520 I want to say it was escatalopram, and I'll double 0:05:41.600 --> 0:05:48.200 check when I went in for my peptides, and that doctor, 0:05:48.360 --> 0:05:49.320 the old gentleman. 0:05:49.080 --> 0:05:51.400 Here, now I allowed to say that you were on 0:05:51.440 --> 0:05:53.080 your fourth relapse. 0:05:53.279 --> 0:05:56.000 Yes, no, I couldn't stop relapsing and I was on 0:05:56.040 --> 0:05:58.840 these pills and I there was just like there was 0:05:58.880 --> 0:05:59.960 no light at the end of the tunnel. 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:01.760 So I went and got these peptides. There was a. 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:07.279 Gentleman who was forty years sober or forty five, Yeah, 0:06:07.279 --> 0:06:08.800 and he came in and he put a short hand 0:06:08.800 --> 0:06:10.400 on my shoulder and he goes, you're going to continue 0:06:10.440 --> 0:06:12.800 to relapse if you continue to take these meds. 0:06:13.120 --> 0:06:13.360 Wow. 0:06:13.480 --> 0:06:15.159 And I'll never forget that. 0:06:15.160 --> 0:06:18.240 That sticks with me every day and being off my 0:06:18.360 --> 0:06:23.800 medicine has honestly relieved me of more anxiety. Wow. And 0:06:23.839 --> 0:06:26.880 I don't not for everybody. I'm speaking on me, and 0:06:27.360 --> 0:06:29.800 it's a personal thing. But like even if you you know, 0:06:29.880 --> 0:06:33.000 if you still have anxiety while taking meds, maybe you know, 0:06:33.160 --> 0:06:35.400 like I I'm not going to say like I took 0:06:35.640 --> 0:06:39.600 I stopped doing my meds and like everything was roses. No. 0:06:39.800 --> 0:06:42.159 I had to work, I breath work, I had to 0:06:42.279 --> 0:06:44.640 compartmentalize different things that I was thinking about. 0:06:44.760 --> 0:06:47.400 It took a lot of work. But I where I 0:06:47.440 --> 0:06:48.119 am right now. 0:06:48.360 --> 0:06:52.440 I thank God that I am not on any anxiety medication. 0:06:53.520 --> 0:06:56.600 Well, and again that's your personal experience. 0:06:56.640 --> 0:06:58.440 For me, it's. 0:06:58.279 --> 0:07:01.800 Your personal experience, and everybody is different and it's not 0:07:02.160 --> 0:07:03.200 one size fits all. 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:07.360 I think everybody's like chemical imbalance is different in everybody's life. 0:07:07.360 --> 0:07:09.920 I'm a single person, Like everything has to be a 0:07:10.040 --> 0:07:13.760 tailored any prescription you go on, even your doctor. 0:07:14.000 --> 0:07:15.800 You guys have to be on the same page. And 0:07:16.320 --> 0:07:16.840 even a. 0:07:16.760 --> 0:07:20.280 Doctor, no one knows you like you know you. If 0:07:20.320 --> 0:07:24.280 something is feeling off, you have to We've spoken about this. 0:07:24.400 --> 0:07:28.680 Advocate for your health in every capacity, including mental, which 0:07:28.720 --> 0:07:33.720 I believe is the most important. Yes, And I was 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:39.440 on anti anxiety medication and antidepression medication and I was 0:07:39.600 --> 0:07:40.400 drinking on. 0:07:40.360 --> 0:07:44.520 It like I couldn't because how stupid am I. I'm like, 0:07:44.560 --> 0:07:45.960 I'm just why I got really depressed. 0:07:45.960 --> 0:07:49.640 It's like it's called the Daily Sunday Series because you've 0:07:49.760 --> 0:07:51.360 been sipping on as apressant. 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:53.600 And that's where I think where I would take my 0:07:53.680 --> 0:07:55.800 med and I was like, I'm still depressed, so I 0:07:55.840 --> 0:07:57.640 would go down the liquor thing and it was like 0:07:57.680 --> 0:07:59.680 I was hoping that pill would be the cure of all. 0:08:00.080 --> 0:08:01.320 I still had to do work. 0:08:01.440 --> 0:08:03.160 Even if maybe if I took the pills and I 0:08:03.160 --> 0:08:05.400 did the work that I still did, maybe the pills 0:08:05.400 --> 0:08:06.400 would benefit me. 0:08:06.440 --> 0:08:08.400 But right now, I like where I'm at okay. 0:08:08.120 --> 0:08:09.840 So then there shouldn't be anything that changes. 0:08:09.880 --> 0:08:10.680 There's the thing. 0:08:11.080 --> 0:08:13.640 I tend to go to holistic route before I tap 0:08:13.680 --> 0:08:17.560 in medication. But I'm also I'm not somewhare though that 0:08:17.600 --> 0:08:20.920 it's against it. I'm like, there are points in time 0:08:21.000 --> 0:08:22.760 where it's like I'm going to need to tap in 0:08:23.080 --> 0:08:27.600 science and someone put me on something. I am not 0:08:27.640 --> 0:08:30.960 on anything right now, just like my regular supplements. But 0:08:31.080 --> 0:08:37.400 I will say when I started filming again, I had 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:40.800 so much anxiety it was debilitating for me to leave 0:08:40.920 --> 0:08:41.400 the house. 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:47.600 Yeah that I was there, I'm there, I'm all. I 0:08:47.600 --> 0:08:49.520 think everybody's there. And the one thing that I always 0:08:49.600 --> 0:08:53.559 have to get there, I can get anxiety, Like overthinking 0:08:53.720 --> 0:08:55.040 is what gives me anxiety. 0:08:55.240 --> 0:08:57.760 Tell me this, when you when you make a plan, 0:08:58.400 --> 0:09:00.440 do you start playing it in your mind, like what 0:09:00.480 --> 0:09:02.679 are we going to talk about her? And then order? 0:09:02.800 --> 0:09:05.480 And then what if? What if what I ate doesn't. 0:09:05.200 --> 0:09:06.720 Agree with me? Well, then that's. 0:09:08.160 --> 0:09:10.520 Whatever I eat. You gotta make sure because I'm a 0:09:10.520 --> 0:09:14.360 homeplate shitter. So if i'm out about I'm eating salads. 0:09:14.720 --> 0:09:18.160 But when I make plans, Yes, that is what I 0:09:18.280 --> 0:09:20.679 used to do and I'm doing it now. But I'm 0:09:20.679 --> 0:09:24.199 trying to work on it and not think I made plans. 0:09:25.360 --> 0:09:27.920 What are these plans going to consist of? What conversation? 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:30.440 What if this doesn't go right? Oh my gosh, what 0:09:30.520 --> 0:09:33.200 if so and so says this? And something is brought 0:09:33.280 --> 0:09:35.480 up that I don't want to talk about. Oh my gosh, 0:09:35.520 --> 0:09:38.000 what if so and so comes and brings more conversation? 0:09:38.400 --> 0:09:41.600 And then I go, wow, I want to cancel. Now 0:09:41.679 --> 0:09:45.080 I make the plan, and I go perfect, what am 0:09:45.120 --> 0:09:46.240 I doing right now? 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:47.120 Oh? 0:09:47.200 --> 0:09:48.600 Keep your head where you're keeping my hair? 0:09:48.679 --> 0:09:50.960 And then even when it's getting closer and I'm like, oh, 0:09:51.040 --> 0:09:53.880 I have to start getting ready. What am I going 0:09:53.960 --> 0:09:58.880 to wear? Let's brush my tea? Should I do whitening strips? 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:02.720 Just let's think in the now, and before you know it, 0:10:02.840 --> 0:10:06.080 you're blowing my you you can go out, And then 0:10:06.200 --> 0:10:07.480 that's what I've tried to do. 0:10:07.520 --> 0:10:09.280 And I'm not thinking of any conversation. 0:10:09.440 --> 0:10:11.559 I'm not even thinking, like, I can't even think about 0:10:11.559 --> 0:10:13.080 how I'm going to say hello to you, because that 0:10:13.160 --> 0:10:15.520 anxiety right there will send me home. 0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:18.520 Yeah, So I just think, okay, right now I'm going 0:10:18.559 --> 0:10:21.480 to get out of my car. Do I have everything? Yes? 0:10:21.600 --> 0:10:24.880 Okay, let's walk and enjoy this scene I'm not thinking 0:10:24.880 --> 0:10:26.920 about who I'm seeing, where we're going. 0:10:27.160 --> 0:10:29.920 I'm just enjoying what is going on around me at 0:10:29.920 --> 0:10:30.520 that time. 0:10:31.000 --> 0:10:34.640 Yeah, because once you get there, does your anxiety. 0:10:34.160 --> 0:10:37.520 Kind of that's dissipated because now it's like I've looked 0:10:37.520 --> 0:10:38.160 at things. 0:10:37.920 --> 0:10:38.880 And I'll be like, did you guys? 0:10:38.880 --> 0:10:40.760 See Like it's almost like just being in the now 0:10:40.800 --> 0:10:43.440 has brought me so much peace, well peace, and not 0:10:43.480 --> 0:10:46.480 only that, but like little conversations that you're worried about having. 0:10:46.520 --> 0:10:48.360 Now I'm like, did you see the billboard of Da 0:10:48.440 --> 0:10:50.280 Da Da Da? I had no idea that was coming out, 0:10:50.320 --> 0:10:52.880 and now it started a whole thing. And now just. 0:10:52.960 --> 0:10:57.080 Being in this it gives me so much anxiety, see literally, 0:10:57.320 --> 0:10:59.480 And I think that's another reason why I keep a 0:10:59.600 --> 0:11:03.240 very group of friends, because I know who I feel 0:11:03.280 --> 0:11:03.959 comfortable with. 0:11:04.080 --> 0:11:06.880 It feels effortless. I don't worry. I look forward to 0:11:06.960 --> 0:11:08.480 it any time. 0:11:08.679 --> 0:11:10.880 Like even if I have a group that I'm going 0:11:10.880 --> 0:11:12.840 with and they're like, oh I invited so, and so I'm. 0:11:12.679 --> 0:11:14.679 Like, oh no, how was I going to throw it off? 0:11:14.960 --> 0:11:17.920 That may throw off the dynamic and it and then 0:11:17.960 --> 0:11:18.280 I have. 0:11:18.240 --> 0:11:19.520 To ask them how they've been and they're going to 0:11:19.559 --> 0:11:20.600 tell me a bunch of shit that I. 0:11:20.520 --> 0:11:24.760 Don't care about. The ball talk. Ball talk? Is the anxiety? 0:11:26.480 --> 0:11:27.360 Is this normal? 0:11:27.720 --> 0:11:27.920 Yes? 0:11:27.960 --> 0:11:29.520 I think this is what comes with age. 0:11:30.720 --> 0:11:33.040 Yes, I feel like it should be calmed down with age. 0:11:33.200 --> 0:11:35.040 No, because I feel like no, no, no, no, no, 0:11:35.080 --> 0:11:37.400 I look at it, and because I have anxiety. 0:11:37.400 --> 0:11:39.240 I feel like with age you get more of it. 0:11:39.440 --> 0:11:41.480 You feel like you should be in a certain spots 0:11:41.600 --> 0:11:44.199 you're looking at other people's life, comparing yourself. 0:11:44.360 --> 0:11:45.520 Why am I not ahead? 0:11:45.640 --> 0:11:48.160 Or things like that when you're young in twenty or 0:11:48.200 --> 0:11:51.480 twenty one going out comparison is the. 0:11:51.960 --> 0:11:53.920 Is the raw? Is the thief of joy? 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:56.840 Yeah, it's so true. Yeah, but like that, I feel 0:11:56.880 --> 0:12:00.120 like a lot of people do that, you know, so, 0:12:00.160 --> 0:12:00.640 I think. 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:03.079 When they see things, you start aspiring. 0:12:02.640 --> 0:12:05.000 Like they Let me just put it this way for you. 0:12:05.000 --> 0:12:07.720 You have kids, Yes, you see a whole bunch of 0:12:07.760 --> 0:12:10.800 other kids you don't, But how many other of those 0:12:10.840 --> 0:12:14.000 people are comparing those not the kids, but the lifestyles 0:12:14.000 --> 0:12:16.280 of kids around a lot? 0:12:16.640 --> 0:12:16.959 I know it. 0:12:17.160 --> 0:12:18.920 You may not see it, but like there's a lot 0:12:18.960 --> 0:12:21.679 of people who are seeing, like what other kids are 0:12:21.720 --> 0:12:25.079 getting from their parents that maybe I can't afford now 0:12:25.120 --> 0:12:27.320 that starts to give me anxiety. Where have I gone wrong? 0:12:27.360 --> 0:12:29.560 What have I done? How can I get better? 0:12:29.679 --> 0:12:32.720 They haven't hit that point yet in minutes because Ocean's 0:12:32.760 --> 0:12:35.480 still so young. She's going to be starting like real 0:12:35.520 --> 0:12:39.400 big kids school soon. Yeah, I'm still unsure where she's 0:12:39.440 --> 0:12:42.240 going to go at this point in time. 0:12:43.559 --> 0:12:45.719 You have to remember we're going the private school. 0:12:45.480 --> 0:12:48.040 Route, and then there's going to be kids, see and 0:12:48.080 --> 0:12:49.840 I'm only thinking for me, not my kid, But like, 0:12:49.880 --> 0:12:52.520 it will start to give me anxiety if she's falling 0:12:52.520 --> 0:12:54.440 back in school or if she's ahead in school. You 0:12:54.480 --> 0:12:57.640 start there's just anxiety that just keeps coming as an 0:12:57.640 --> 0:12:58.400 adult type hit. 0:12:58.520 --> 0:13:02.160 But I have to say this, what she experiences at school, 0:13:02.760 --> 0:13:06.160 she's going to experience at the other house anyway. Like 0:13:06.280 --> 0:13:11.280 Ocean has already been in really amazing cars, She's already 0:13:11.280 --> 0:13:15.440 been on private jets, and I have to she doesn't talk. 0:13:15.280 --> 0:13:17.120 About it, no, like those things. 0:13:17.120 --> 0:13:19.920 But there's parents that you'll never be able to do that. 0:13:20.360 --> 0:13:22.640 Yeah, but there's parents that will never be able to 0:13:22.679 --> 0:13:24.600 do that for their kid or anything else. 0:13:25.440 --> 0:13:29.160 It is one percent of the population on the planet 0:13:29.320 --> 0:13:34.280 that maybe less I know, but no, it will actually 0:13:34.360 --> 0:13:39.160 experience life in that way. The stressors, yes, of kids, 0:13:39.320 --> 0:13:43.079 especially in a place like Los Angeles. People are giving 0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:46.839 their sixteen year olds Aston Martin's as their first car. 0:13:47.360 --> 0:13:52.240 And for me, I have experienced all of that that. 0:13:52.400 --> 0:13:54.200 I think if Ocean came to me, I'd be like, 0:13:54.800 --> 0:13:57.880 get the fuck over it. You're not having that car. 0:13:58.760 --> 0:14:02.360 There's your Hyundai, which I love, by the way, I 0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:06.200 mean Hunda very say, very like, that's. 0:14:05.960 --> 0:14:09.439 What I would be getting. Car love Corolla. Get out 0:14:09.440 --> 0:14:10.400 of here. That's where I'm at. 0:14:10.640 --> 0:14:13.120 Do you know how hard I rock with my GMC Denali. 0:14:14.080 --> 0:14:16.760 That's a very nice vehicle. Oh, very nice. 0:14:16.840 --> 0:14:17.640 No, it's very nice. 0:14:17.800 --> 0:14:21.480 It's very nice, very nice, very nice. 0:14:22.400 --> 0:14:27.480 Not a Chevy. It's a GMC Yukon Denali, not just 0:14:27.520 --> 0:14:27.960 a Yukon. 0:14:28.040 --> 0:14:30.120 Maybe I don't know cars, very you do not know cars, 0:14:30.160 --> 0:14:32.640 because yours is the top tier of that brand. I 0:14:32.640 --> 0:14:36.760 thought the Escalade was well that, yes, but then you're 0:14:37.160 --> 0:14:40.320 two different cars. I mean you could have got yours 0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:44.480 with like a bigger engine that's like a sport exactly why, 0:14:44.560 --> 0:14:50.400 And then I don't know escalades dark invader lightsabers on 0:14:50.440 --> 0:14:51.840 the back of the Escalator. 0:14:51.880 --> 0:14:54.280 Yeah, those big long lights, like what are we doing 0:14:54.320 --> 0:14:55.200 and feel. 0:14:55.000 --> 0:14:59.160 The need to spend more money on a car where I'm. 0:14:59.040 --> 0:15:02.200 Like, I have you more anxiety throw to pit. 0:15:02.160 --> 0:15:04.600 Bulls in here to children, I mean most of the time, 0:15:05.640 --> 0:15:08.520 which also gives me massive anxiety when I because I 0:15:08.640 --> 0:15:12.120 keep like my area very clean, right, And then Lisa 0:15:12.120 --> 0:15:14.720 gets in all her shit in the center console and 0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:19.280 I then I look in the back and the kid's 0:15:19.560 --> 0:15:24.360 Ocean is eating whatever she's eating, spilling crumbs everywhere. 0:15:24.400 --> 0:15:26.480 Sosa is unscrewed the lid to her bottle because she 0:15:26.480 --> 0:15:31.080 can do that now, and is whipping the milk everywhere. 0:15:32.320 --> 0:15:34.320 I go into full panic. 0:15:45.920 --> 0:15:50.560 Actually, I think motherhood has allowed me, as much as possible, 0:15:52.760 --> 0:15:55.600 with just what's in my nature to kind of let 0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:59.440 go and find the gray because by nature, I'm more 0:15:59.520 --> 0:16:03.840 like my dad. Where I'm I just am very particular 0:16:03.880 --> 0:16:07.040 about things. I start feeling like there's an elephant on 0:16:07.080 --> 0:16:10.040 my chest when Ocean, listen how simple this is, and 0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:11.840 I have to actively you guys, you guys are gonna 0:16:11.840 --> 0:16:15.520 think I'm horrible. I have to actively tell myself to 0:16:15.680 --> 0:16:18.400 like not worry about it. This is how silly it gets. 0:16:18.880 --> 0:16:23.400 If she decides to bring a stuffy and a book 0:16:23.480 --> 0:16:26.200 into my room because I go but it doesn't belong 0:16:26.320 --> 0:16:27.920 there in my head. I don't tell her that. I 0:16:27.960 --> 0:16:28.640 just let it happen. 0:16:28.680 --> 0:16:31.280 And I'm like, you can take it back downstairs. But 0:16:31.320 --> 0:16:32.520 I'm like, but it doesn't belong. 0:16:32.760 --> 0:16:34.600 Oh, you need to work the K Pop. 0:16:34.440 --> 0:16:40.560 Demon Hunter book and the ginormous technicolored stuffy doesn't go 0:16:40.600 --> 0:16:41.200 in my bedroom. 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:43.520 Yeah, but think how excited she gets, would you? I know? 0:16:43.640 --> 0:16:45.800 But that's what I'm saying is there are some things 0:16:45.840 --> 0:16:46.440 that are just. 0:16:46.800 --> 0:16:47.920 In Is that OCD? 0:16:48.720 --> 0:16:51.320 It might be that's OCD, because like for me, I 0:16:51.360 --> 0:16:54.360 can I was last night. I slept with a thing 0:16:54.400 --> 0:16:57.000 on my leg just to wrap it middle of the night, 0:16:57.080 --> 0:16:59.120 woke up, took it off and just through it. Don't 0:16:59.120 --> 0:17:01.280 know where it went. I picked that up this morning, 0:17:01.560 --> 0:17:04.760 but like, could you do that? I would fold it 0:17:04.760 --> 0:17:05.960 and put it back into the cabin. 0:17:06.119 --> 0:17:07.600 I just throw it on the ground and we'll figure it out. 0:17:07.640 --> 0:17:09.040 Because I don't want to wake up to it. I 0:17:09.080 --> 0:17:10.920 need to wake up in the morning. I have such 0:17:10.960 --> 0:17:15.439 a strict routine. I don't want anything that does not belong, 0:17:15.600 --> 0:17:18.359 even the cord that comes out of my nightstand that 0:17:18.440 --> 0:17:23.200 I plug. You need to exposure I'm exposed. 0:17:23.720 --> 0:17:25.679 No, you need more exposure therapy. 0:17:25.800 --> 0:17:29.080 You need to wake up with your why to bring 0:17:29.119 --> 0:17:32.280 you down from one hundred when little things are off, 0:17:32.680 --> 0:17:34.520 to not send you down a spiral. 0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:36.600 Okay, but tell me this. Do you think it's because 0:17:36.640 --> 0:17:39.320 I have such little control? Which sounds weird because I 0:17:39.320 --> 0:17:41.440 actually do have a lot of control in my life, 0:17:41.600 --> 0:17:44.520 but there are certain things that we cannot control. So 0:17:44.600 --> 0:17:48.399 do you think that it manifests itself into me controlling 0:17:48.440 --> 0:17:51.240 the one thing that I can control, which is my bedroom. 0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:53.320 Here's the one thing that I'm taking from this. You 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:57.520 can control a lot of things. You can't control any outcomes. 0:17:58.240 --> 0:18:01.120 You can control the outcome of this. Yes, the outcome 0:18:01.160 --> 0:18:04.399 is so clean. That is your outcome with everything that 0:18:04.440 --> 0:18:06.560 you do in life. Yes, you can do it and 0:18:06.600 --> 0:18:10.440 you have control. But what is the outcome with where 0:18:10.440 --> 0:18:10.920 you're going? 0:18:11.160 --> 0:18:14.040 You don't know, but the house would. 0:18:14.520 --> 0:18:15.280 So there you go. 0:18:15.400 --> 0:18:18.679 You're you You like it because you know that you 0:18:18.880 --> 0:18:21.320 have control over that at all times. 0:18:21.520 --> 0:18:22.639 Yeah, there it is. 0:18:23.040 --> 0:18:26.119 Maybe I'm no doctor, but maybe we're getting down to something. 0:18:26.440 --> 0:18:30.320 Also, I know who the culprit is of the messy 0:18:30.359 --> 0:18:32.760 house all the time. It ain't the kids, my mom 0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:36.560 is in Palm Springs right now. Days for three days. 0:18:36.720 --> 0:18:42.040 The house is immaculate. I mean, and there's two kids. 0:18:42.040 --> 0:18:45.280 They're they're still here running around. It's business as usual. 0:18:46.280 --> 0:18:47.840 My mother is the cause. 0:18:47.880 --> 0:18:50.680 Of all of the came. Oh yeah, because I go now. 0:18:50.600 --> 0:18:53.960 Even the playroom, you guys were up there. It looks great. 0:18:54.119 --> 0:18:56.360 Well here, yeah, because we pick up things here and there. 0:18:56.400 --> 0:18:58.520 But Mom will get things out to play with them 0:18:58.560 --> 0:19:01.600 and then say it was them. 0:19:01.680 --> 0:19:02.440 She's a little ship. 0:19:02.880 --> 0:19:06.320