1 00:00:00,880 --> 00:00:03,800 Speaker 1: With all the festivities right around the corner. We've teamed 2 00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:06,880 Speaker 1: up with our friends a Goal Series from Pantine to 3 00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: help you create a new you for the holidays. We've 4 00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:13,880 Speaker 1: got your chance to win one thousand, five hundred dollars. 5 00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:16,880 Speaker 1: That's right, I did, I said at one thousand, five 6 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:20,920 Speaker 1: hundred dollars to cover a new haird and clothes plus 7 00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:25,239 Speaker 1: a haircare gift basket from Gold Series from Pantine. Enter 8 00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:28,520 Speaker 1: and get rules at Steve HARVEYFM dot com. And no 9 00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:31,520 Speaker 1: matter how you work, your hair, Goal Series works hard 10 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:36,120 Speaker 1: while you work, Wonders works better because it's made better. 11 00:00:36,479 --> 00:00:40,760 Speaker 1: Get all the info at Steve HARVEYFM dot com. All right, 12 00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:46,640 Speaker 1: at fifteen hundred dollars. All right, it's time now for 13 00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,800 Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter. And if you need advice on relationships, 14 00:00:49,880 --> 00:00:53,960 Speaker 1: on dating, work, on sex, parenting, and more, please submit 15 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,280 Speaker 1: your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and click 16 00:00:57,400 --> 00:01:01,560 Speaker 1: submit Strawberry Letter. Because what we could be reading your 17 00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:04,360 Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read 18 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:06,600 Speaker 1: this one right here, right now, and you never know 19 00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:10,720 Speaker 1: it could be yours. I'd rather, I'd rather you buckle up, 20 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:19,680 Speaker 1: buckle up it hold long time We got it, but 21 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:24,000 Speaker 1: here it Stolberry letter. I'd rather you buckle up and 22 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:28,520 Speaker 1: hold on tight before I let you read anything. Stop that. 23 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:34,360 Speaker 1: All right, all right, thank you, nephew. Good morning. And 24 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:38,039 Speaker 1: the subject is my ex husband wants me to be 25 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:42,160 Speaker 1: his side chick. All right, here we go, Steve. You're 26 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:45,200 Speaker 1: Stephen Shirley. I was married for almost fifteen years and 27 00:01:45,319 --> 00:01:48,440 Speaker 1: my husband cheated on me several times. He eventually got 28 00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:51,440 Speaker 1: tired of hurting me, or so he said, and he 29 00:01:51,560 --> 00:01:54,320 Speaker 1: divorced me. I was depressed at first, but in the 30 00:01:54,360 --> 00:01:57,280 Speaker 1: past two years I've started getting my mojo back, and 31 00:01:57,320 --> 00:02:01,240 Speaker 1: although I'm not dating, I want desperately to have sex. 32 00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:04,800 Speaker 1: I've been able to forgive my ex husband, and that's 33 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:08,400 Speaker 1: how I know I'm in a better place mentally and emotionally. 34 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:11,520 Speaker 1: We don't have children together, but I'm very close to 35 00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:14,320 Speaker 1: his teenage daughter. She lives with her mom, but she 36 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:17,800 Speaker 1: spends some weekends with me. The last time she spent 37 00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:20,440 Speaker 1: the night with me, her father popped up and asked 38 00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,120 Speaker 1: if we could all have a movie night, just like 39 00:02:23,160 --> 00:02:26,079 Speaker 1: old times. I couldn't say no because she was so 40 00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:29,240 Speaker 1: glad to see her daddy. Halfway through the movie, she 41 00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:32,000 Speaker 1: fell asleep on the couch and he made her go 42 00:02:32,080 --> 00:02:36,280 Speaker 1: to bed. I started to clean up, hoping he'd leave, 43 00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 1: but he didn't. He started to beg and plead for 44 00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:43,400 Speaker 1: one more night with me. He said he craves my 45 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,840 Speaker 1: body and he just wanted to spoon with me all night. 46 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:50,240 Speaker 1: He is by far the best lover I've ever had, 47 00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:52,640 Speaker 1: but I couldn't let him know how badly I wanted 48 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:56,200 Speaker 1: to make love to him. It would it would just 49 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:59,320 Speaker 1: make me miserable all over again because I'd be his 50 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:02,840 Speaker 1: side Peece. I told him to go home to his Beyonce. 51 00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:06,600 Speaker 1: This will be his third wife and he's already out 52 00:03:06,639 --> 00:03:09,960 Speaker 1: trying to cheat. Since that night, he's been begging me 53 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:12,600 Speaker 1: to let him spend time with me. I told him 54 00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:16,959 Speaker 1: there's no way in hell I'd ever be his side piece. 55 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:20,400 Speaker 1: He swore he'd leave his Beyonce if I'd let him 56 00:03:20,440 --> 00:03:23,360 Speaker 1: hold me for one more night. I will admit that 57 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,079 Speaker 1: I am enjoying all of the attention from him, and 58 00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:29,320 Speaker 1: I want to believe that he truly misses me and 59 00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:32,000 Speaker 1: he's ready to come home. Is that what it is? 60 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:35,280 Speaker 1: Or does he just want to have sex? All right? 61 00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:37,560 Speaker 1: Come on, for you to even have to ask us 62 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:41,120 Speaker 1: you already know. Yes, it's just the sex. He just 63 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:43,600 Speaker 1: wants to have sex. Don't do it is just about 64 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,640 Speaker 1: the sex. I mean, what else has he done to 65 00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 1: even make you think that he wants more than that? Nothing? 66 00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:51,240 Speaker 1: Because if it were so, you would have put that 67 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 1: in the letter. He swore he'd leave his Beyonce if 68 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:57,760 Speaker 1: you would let him hold you for one more night. 69 00:03:58,400 --> 00:04:01,320 Speaker 1: What that sounds like a line for a song or something. 70 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:05,320 Speaker 1: Get out of here. That right there should tell you 71 00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:08,600 Speaker 1: that he's no good. He hasn't changed. Okay, you said 72 00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 1: it yourself. He wants to cheat on his new girl, 73 00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:14,960 Speaker 1: so please don't let him back in your life. You're 74 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:19,400 Speaker 1: doing well now mentally and emotionally, you said, don't let 75 00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:22,440 Speaker 1: your situation about being desperate to have sex, don't let 76 00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 1: it cloud your judgment. Please, Lying and cheating are apparently 77 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:29,080 Speaker 1: what he does, so don't get caught up again. Can 78 00:04:29,120 --> 00:04:33,080 Speaker 1: people change, Yes, absolutely, they can change, But he hasn't changed, 79 00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:38,680 Speaker 1: So don't start all over with him. Just start preparing 80 00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:44,440 Speaker 1: yourself for your new man, all right, Steve, This letter 81 00:04:44,520 --> 00:04:48,640 Speaker 1: is interesting because this letter is interesting because it's it's 82 00:04:48,680 --> 00:04:51,480 Speaker 1: just full of stuff that that that's obvious to me, 83 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:53,479 Speaker 1: and I don't know how you don't see this. The 84 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,880 Speaker 1: subject is my ex husband wants me to be his 85 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,400 Speaker 1: side cheek. She was married for almost fifteen years, and 86 00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:03,000 Speaker 1: my husband and cheated on me several times because he 87 00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:06,720 Speaker 1: likes side chicks. He eventually got tired of hurting me, 88 00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:10,240 Speaker 1: or so he said. And so you've been depressed at first, 89 00:05:10,279 --> 00:05:13,640 Speaker 1: and he divorced you. And now you say you're starting 90 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:17,479 Speaker 1: to get your mojo back. And although you're not dating, 91 00:05:17,760 --> 00:05:21,599 Speaker 1: I want desperately to have sex. So that means you're 92 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,839 Speaker 1: not dating anybody. You're not having sex. You just but 93 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:28,279 Speaker 1: you do feel better about yourself. You've been able to 94 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:30,720 Speaker 1: forgive my ex husband, and that's how I know him 95 00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:32,800 Speaker 1: in a better place. Okay, that's a good place to 96 00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:36,279 Speaker 1: be it now, I want you to remember this for 97 00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:39,679 Speaker 1: later on in the letter. I've been able to forgive 98 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:41,919 Speaker 1: my ex husband, and that's how I know him in 99 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:45,760 Speaker 1: a better place. Now, you all don't have children, but 100 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:48,080 Speaker 1: you're close to his teenage daughter and she lives with 101 00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:50,440 Speaker 1: a mom, and she spends nights with you on the 102 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:54,200 Speaker 1: weekend sometime, and the last time she spent the night 103 00:05:54,279 --> 00:05:57,440 Speaker 1: with me, her dad, your ex popped up and ask 104 00:05:57,520 --> 00:06:00,760 Speaker 1: if y'all can have a movie night just like old times, 105 00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:03,039 Speaker 1: and you couldn't say no because she was glad to 106 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:06,599 Speaker 1: see her daddy. Halfway through the movie, she fell asleep 107 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,559 Speaker 1: on the couch and he made her go to bed. 108 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:12,280 Speaker 1: You started clean up, hoping he'd leave, but he didn't. 109 00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:16,240 Speaker 1: He started to beg and plead for one more night 110 00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:19,880 Speaker 1: with me. He said, he crazed my body and he 111 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,960 Speaker 1: just wants to spoon with me all night. So here's 112 00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:26,039 Speaker 1: a line, here's my father, best love I've ever had. 113 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:29,719 Speaker 1: Went Excuse me, You just said y'all was married for 114 00:06:29,760 --> 00:06:32,600 Speaker 1: fifteen years. He cheated on yourselver times. You've been divorced 115 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,960 Speaker 1: for two years, and even though you're not dating, you 116 00:06:35,040 --> 00:06:38,159 Speaker 1: want to have sex. The reason he's the best you 117 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 1: ever had is because you ain't had nobody else. All 118 00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:43,960 Speaker 1: that thought, Steve, we're gonna come back and recap today's 119 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,479 Speaker 1: Strawberry letter. The subject my ex husband wants me to 120 00:06:46,520 --> 00:06:49,800 Speaker 1: be a sidekick Her two of Steve's response coming up 121 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:52,960 Speaker 1: at twenty three minutes after Right after this, you're listening 122 00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:57,240 Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. All right, come on, Steve, let's recap 123 00:06:57,279 --> 00:07:00,719 Speaker 1: today's Strawberry letter. The subject my ex husband and want 124 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:05,240 Speaker 1: me me to be his side chick. Well that's interesting 125 00:07:05,360 --> 00:07:08,040 Speaker 1: because you were married for fifteen years and you husband 126 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,400 Speaker 1: cheated on you several times. Like I said, that's because 127 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:14,080 Speaker 1: he lights side chicks. You've gotten your mojo back. You're 128 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:17,000 Speaker 1: still not having sex, but you and you're not dating, 129 00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 1: but you do want to desperately have sex, So that's 130 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 1: why you're considering this. I've been able to forgive my 131 00:07:23,760 --> 00:07:25,800 Speaker 1: husband and now that I know, and that's how I 132 00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:27,880 Speaker 1: know him in a better place. Okay, like I said, 133 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,360 Speaker 1: remember that because I'm gonna use that line later. I've 134 00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:32,320 Speaker 1: been able to forgive max husband. That's how I know 135 00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:34,560 Speaker 1: him in a better place. She's having a movie night 136 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:39,480 Speaker 1: with the man's daughter and he pops up and, just 137 00:07:39,640 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: like old times, after he could watch a movie. You 138 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:43,920 Speaker 1: couldn't say no because the little girl was happy to 139 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:47,520 Speaker 1: see her daddy. She fell asleep halfway through the movie. 140 00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:51,320 Speaker 1: He made her go to bed. You started cleaning up, 141 00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:59,440 Speaker 1: hoping he would just lead. He didn't, so he started 142 00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:02,040 Speaker 1: to beg and plead for one more night with you. 143 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:05,720 Speaker 1: He told you he craves your body and he just 144 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:09,080 Speaker 1: wanted to spoon with you all night. Man, want a 145 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 1: spoon with no damn body? What a spoony anyway, I know, 146 00:08:15,640 --> 00:08:17,960 Speaker 1: But we spoon so we can get the fuck out. 147 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:25,680 Speaker 1: One more time. We spooned so we can get the 148 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 1: fuck out. I'm just telling you that was really good. 149 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:36,680 Speaker 1: That was really good. Yes, to get the fuck out 150 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:42,760 Speaker 1: like that? Now? Uh, he said he craves my body. 151 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:45,040 Speaker 1: He just wanted to spoon with me or not. Now, 152 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:47,800 Speaker 1: you said he is my father, best love I've ever had, 153 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,480 Speaker 1: but I couldn't let him know how bad I wanted 154 00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:53,800 Speaker 1: to make love to him. Well, he's the best love 155 00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,240 Speaker 1: you ever had. You married fifteen years, you didn't cheat 156 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:58,960 Speaker 1: on him, you've been divorced two you ain't dating nobody, 157 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:01,360 Speaker 1: but you definitely want to have sex. So you had 158 00:09:01,559 --> 00:09:04,440 Speaker 1: sex in seventeen years with no damn body but him. 159 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:08,800 Speaker 1: That's why he the best. He had nothing else. That's 160 00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:12,520 Speaker 1: easy to beat them best when you're the only one. Okay, 161 00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:17,120 Speaker 1: Now I told him to go home to his fiance. 162 00:09:17,960 --> 00:09:21,400 Speaker 1: This will be his third wife and he's already out 163 00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:25,440 Speaker 1: trying to cheat. Well since that night, he's been begging 164 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:30,240 Speaker 1: to let you spend time with him. All right, Now 165 00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:33,160 Speaker 1: here's the whole letter. I told him there's no where 166 00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:37,000 Speaker 1: in hell I'd ever be his side piece. He swore 167 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:41,520 Speaker 1: he'd leave his fiance if I let him hold me 168 00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:45,200 Speaker 1: for one more night. Shirley said it best to sound 169 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:55,640 Speaker 1: like a damn soul fly for one nine. But even 170 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:59,800 Speaker 1: after that song, do you know the song right after 171 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:03,000 Speaker 1: that on loose this album? If only for one night, 172 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:08,520 Speaker 1: it rolls right into creep? Yes, So all he wanna 173 00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:12,280 Speaker 1: do is creep with you? Now? How that hell that sound? 174 00:10:12,559 --> 00:10:16,480 Speaker 1: If you let me hold you one more time? I'll 175 00:10:16,559 --> 00:10:20,959 Speaker 1: leave my fiance? What for one more time? I'm fin 176 00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 1: to give up some steady at the house for just 177 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:27,520 Speaker 1: one more damned time, and then I'll leave my fiance. 178 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:31,040 Speaker 1: How that sound to you? Nice? Then she's I will 179 00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:34,280 Speaker 1: admit that I'm enjoying all the attention from him. That's 180 00:10:34,280 --> 00:10:37,280 Speaker 1: because you ain't getting it from nobody else. You said 181 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:41,760 Speaker 1: you ain't dating, lady. Let's go back up to the top. 182 00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:45,840 Speaker 1: You said, I've been able to forgive my ex husband, 183 00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:48,320 Speaker 1: and that's how I know I'm in a better place. 184 00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:51,640 Speaker 1: If you're in a better place, why would you leave 185 00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,440 Speaker 1: being in a better place to go back to the 186 00:10:54,559 --> 00:10:59,000 Speaker 1: other place where you weren't better? It don't make no 187 00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:05,280 Speaker 1: sense right now, she says, I want to believe that 188 00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:08,720 Speaker 1: he truly misses me, and he's ready to come home. 189 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:14,760 Speaker 1: Let's stop this. He's ready to come home, he already 190 00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:18,600 Speaker 1: at home with his fiancee. And then, you know, listen 191 00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:23,520 Speaker 1: to me. You're not understanding what's really happening here. Here's 192 00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:26,679 Speaker 1: a deal. Does he want to have does he is 193 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:29,120 Speaker 1: it that? Is that what it is he wants to 194 00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:31,360 Speaker 1: come home? Or does he just want to have sex. 195 00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:34,760 Speaker 1: Here's a deal, lady, he wants to play you because 196 00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:39,320 Speaker 1: that's what he does. You don't think he said this before. 197 00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:44,480 Speaker 1: If you just let me hold you one more time alive, 198 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:49,199 Speaker 1: he'd have left this his third wife. I know this 199 00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:58,040 Speaker 1: hill third wife. This what he hadn't told you this before? 200 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:02,959 Speaker 1: He said this before. He tells this to everybody. Now, 201 00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:07,520 Speaker 1: here's the problem you got. Here's what you need to understand. 202 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:15,000 Speaker 1: It's the same. He still cheats. Of course, he wants 203 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:17,480 Speaker 1: you to be the side chick, because that's what he do. 204 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:21,600 Speaker 1: He still cheats. You will be letting the same behavior 205 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:26,240 Speaker 1: back into your life. He's cheating on his fiance right now. 206 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:29,920 Speaker 1: He has not changed any of his behavior. He's just 207 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:34,120 Speaker 1: offering you the side chick position and if you let 208 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:37,920 Speaker 1: him hold you, you gonna be this. You just told him, yes, 209 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:45,560 Speaker 1: I'll be the side chick. And yes he misses you. Yes, 210 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:52,800 Speaker 1: he misses you because he misses cheating with you. So 211 00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:56,880 Speaker 1: now he missed cheating on you, and now he's ready 212 00:12:56,920 --> 00:13:02,240 Speaker 1: to cheat with your. Lady at it. You go back 213 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:05,240 Speaker 1: to hear them you food, Yeah, don't do it. Post 214 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 1: your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve HARVEYFM on 215 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:11,200 Speaker 1: Instagram and Facebook, and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast 216 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:14,040 Speaker 1: on demand. They're coming up at forty six minutes after 217 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:17,880 Speaker 1: the hour, Junior and Sports Talk. Right after this, you're 218 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:20,400 Speaker 1: listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show