Speaker 1: Welcome to Can't Flee Reckless, the production of iHeartRadio and
Speaker 1: The Black Effect. And just like that, y'all, we are
Speaker 1: back with yet another Carefully Reckless episode with your girl,
Speaker 1: Jess Hilarious.
Speaker 2: So listen. What I do is I be.
Speaker 1: Fixing people's mess, y'all, and y'all know I love it.
Speaker 1: I have a different intro every single time. Tell me
Speaker 1: if y'all think I should get an intro for Just
Speaker 1: Fix My Mess, because I have one on Breakfast Club
Speaker 1: for Jess with the Mess. I got one on Breakfast
Speaker 1: Club for Just with the Mess. I don't have an
Speaker 1: intro for Just Fix My Mess for my podcast for
Speaker 1: Carefully Reckless under the Black Effect. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So I made it. You know that's something that I
Speaker 1: should voice. Y'all should go spam Charlemagne's comments the Black
Speaker 1: Effect and iHeart and Breakfast Club fucking throw them in
Speaker 1: there too.
Speaker 2: Spam.
Speaker 1: Ess Hilarious needs her own intro for Jess Fix My
Speaker 1: Mess on her podcast that we listen to. We tune
Speaker 1: into each and every Wednesday, and so we can't have
Speaker 1: her fixing people's mess if she's not gonna intro it, right,
Speaker 1: So I need an intro. So we're going definitely we
Speaker 1: are what was this called boycotton, We are boycotting and
Speaker 1: rioting for justice intro.
Speaker 2: All right, that's what we're gonna do, all right, but
Speaker 2: we're gonna jump right into it now.
Speaker 1: We don't have voice memos this episode because people don't
Speaker 1: want their voices to be known.
Speaker 2: And that was explained and I do understand you, mate,
Speaker 2: Go and know your voice.
Speaker 1: You calling in about your boyfriend, that nigga, if you
Speaker 1: listened to carefully reckless, he's going to know it's you.
Speaker 2: So please tread lightly, y'all. Tread lightly, y'all.
Speaker 1: I'll be reading. This is from a woman. Hey, Jess,
Speaker 1: I need help. So I've been with my fiance for
Speaker 1: a year and a half and it's been pure hell down.
Speaker 1: When we first got together, I was in a good
Speaker 1: place mentally, emotionally, financially, et cetera.
Speaker 2: Okay, so you was good all the way around.
Speaker 1: So he was living with his brother, but things happened
Speaker 1: to where he had to move. Me, being Captain saber Hole,
Speaker 1: told him he can stay with me till he found
Speaker 1: another place. Mistake number one, Yes it was girl, not
Speaker 1: he can move with you until he found another place.
Speaker 1: If he was your nigga and he moved with you,
Speaker 1: he wasn't moving out.
Speaker 2: That that's just what it is.
Speaker 1: Within that time, I found out I was pregnant, so
Speaker 1: we agreed to just continue to live together. Okay, right
Speaker 1: before I found out I was pregnant, I let him
Speaker 1: use my car to go to work one night, and
Speaker 1: he ended up totaling it. Oh man, I made him
Speaker 1: put down the down payment on another car because he
Speaker 1: was somewhere he wasn't supposed to be.
Speaker 2: Oh, okay, I know the fuck that's right, But no, you.
Speaker 1: Don't make him put a car up a down payment
Speaker 1: on the new car because he was somewhere he wasn't
Speaker 1: supposed to be. You make him put the fucking down
Speaker 1: payment on the new car because he totaled your shit
Speaker 1: and that wasn't his. So I pay the car note,
Speaker 1: the insurance, the rent, electricity, and so on and so forth.
Speaker 2: Now this way the real issues begin.
Speaker 1: Once he found out I was pregnant, he started disappearing
Speaker 1: on me on his payday. He would go lay up
Speaker 1: with whoever and come back home once he's broke.
Speaker 2: I'm pregnant anymore, so I take him back.
Speaker 1: That was a lot to digest in that last little sentence,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna rent it back for those in the back.
Speaker 1: On his payday, he would go lay up with whoever
Speaker 1: and come back home once he's broke.
Speaker 2: I'm pregnant and emotional, so I take him back. Oh babe.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm.
Speaker 1: I would say mistake number two, but it was so
Speaker 1: many other mistakes leading up to this one. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: let you go in this becomes an ongoing thing. During
Speaker 1: the middle of my pregnancy, I caught COVID really bad,
Speaker 1: so I ended up on bed rests.
Speaker 2: Oh Jesus.
Speaker 1: I started getting unemployment shortly after, and I was still
Speaker 1: paying all the bills myself. When I can time what
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out what this is saying. Y'all
Speaker 1: hold up, give me a second. Y'all gotta you know,
Speaker 1: because when they write, they write a little fast. I
Speaker 1: told y'all to make sure y'all punctuate or punctualize or
Speaker 1: punctualize when y'all write, and shit, I'm trying to figure
Speaker 1: it out.
Speaker 2: So this is.
Speaker 1: See if I'm gonna say if I'm a read and then
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say if I can make sense of it
Speaker 1: when I can time to renew my lease, my unemployment
Speaker 1: had ran out, and I end up having to move
Speaker 1: with his mom. Okay, so anyway it happened like this,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna just break it down. When it came time
Speaker 1: to renew the lease, my unemployment had ran out and
Speaker 1: I ended up having to move with his mom.
Speaker 2: I thought this move.
Speaker 1: Would help me as far as child care and being
Speaker 1: able to save. Two months after moving in with his mom,
Speaker 1: he quits his job. I was pissed, but it was
Speaker 1: a nightclub where he did most of his hoeing, so
Speaker 1: I assumed he would just find another job. It's been
Speaker 1: nine months and he still don't have a job. His
Speaker 1: mom became really sick and she put me on her
Speaker 1: medical paperwork because he's unreliable.
Speaker 2: Damn. So now you got two headaches, him and his mom.
Speaker 1: So when she gets real sick, I'm the one that
Speaker 1: has to take off work and make sure she's taken
Speaker 1: care of. I have fallen completely out of love with him,
Speaker 1: but I have a lot of love for him because
Speaker 1: he's still my child's father, and given the history that
Speaker 1: y'all went through. So yeah, I don't know what to
Speaker 1: do because I don't have family that can help me,
Speaker 1: especially with childcare, so I feel like I'm obligated to
Speaker 1: stay in a miserable place in order to make sure
Speaker 1: my child is taken care of. I am stressed to
Speaker 1: the point where I've lost almost twenty pounds in a month.
Speaker 1: Please just keep it real with me and help me
Speaker 1: fix my mess. Love your bunches, baby, I love you too,
Speaker 1: and this is why I'm about to get in your
Speaker 1: ass because I love you. This is gonna be some
Speaker 1: tough love. But baby, if it ain't coming from none
Speaker 1: of your friends, if it ain't coming from your mom,
Speaker 1: I don't know the relationship between y'all. Even if it
Speaker 1: didn't come from his motherfucking mom who he couldn't even move.
Speaker 2: With at first.
Speaker 1: See you see that that's a red flag. You lost
Speaker 1: your job and had to move in with his mom.
Speaker 1: You know you're pregnant. You were already paying the fucking bills,
Speaker 1: every single bill there was to pay, you were paying it,
Speaker 1: so you were already superwoman in your own house. He
Speaker 1: was already doing bad by yourself with a nigga who
Speaker 1: ain't worth two shits. I'm sorry, excuse me, but this
Speaker 1: is exactly what you're giving me, So I'm just regurgitating
Speaker 1: it back to you. And sometimes that is the advice
Speaker 1: you hearing your own shit thrown back at you, so
Speaker 1: to make you further realize what you need to do.
Speaker 1: All right, now, we can't put the baby back, No,
Speaker 1: we can't. And I know you do not regret your child.
Speaker 1: I would never regret any child that I had that
Speaker 1: I gave birth to because of the father. So that's
Speaker 1: one thing. So we have a baby. We know that
Speaker 1: we knew that he was unfucking reliable before you found
Speaker 1: out you were pregnant. You know what I'm saying. He
Speaker 1: had to move in with you, Like you said, that
Speaker 1: was your first mistake. Why couldn't he move in with
Speaker 1: his fucking mother?
Speaker 2: All right?
Speaker 1: Because he likes to be taken care of. You moved
Speaker 1: him in and you enabled him. Yep, you played a
Speaker 1: part in him being lazy. You played a part in
Speaker 1: him not being able to handle his responsibilities. You allowed it,
Speaker 1: and then you expected for him to change. That's not
Speaker 1: even what's supposed to been happening. Didn't even take care
Speaker 1: of herself. He damn sure would not be able to
Speaker 1: take care of a baby. And he and you started
Speaker 1: taking care of him. So he was okay, resting ashore,
Speaker 1: knowing that if she take care of me, she definitely
Speaker 1: can be a good mother to this baby.
Speaker 2: So as long as I got her, I'm good. You
Speaker 2: know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So you enabled him, then you lost the job, y'all
Speaker 1: had to move in with his mom. He got a job.
Speaker 1: After two months, he quit. Oh no, wait, let me
Speaker 1: go back. I don't want him misquote you. After two months, Yeah,
Speaker 1: he quit. He didn't even get fucking fired. He quit
Speaker 1: his job after moving in with his mom. Why because
Speaker 1: his mom ain't gonna put him out. That's one thing.
Speaker 1: His mom ain't gonna put you out. And if she
Speaker 1: ain't gonna put you out, she ain't gonna put him out.
Speaker 2: There we go right there, she not.
Speaker 1: Obviously, you two have built the bond because you over
Speaker 1: here taking care of her. Now like you not pregnant,
Speaker 1: in bedridden. You're supposed to been put on bed rest
Speaker 1: because you caught COVID. Shit happens, So now you're even
Speaker 1: more in shambles, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: Do you see this pattern?
Speaker 1: Nine months later, fast forward, the baby's here, he still
Speaker 1: ain't got no fucking job, and You're taking care of
Speaker 1: not only him, but his mother and your baby. So
Speaker 1: you got three people to take care of, two kids
Speaker 1: and a mom. Because I'm sorry, your baby daddy is
Speaker 1: your kid. That's exactly what you need to be claiming.
Speaker 1: Is ass on tagsas or something writing that motherfucker off.
Speaker 1: I wish you could write off somebody. I really wish
Speaker 1: you could a grown ass people. But it sounds as
Speaker 1: if you know exactly what the hell you need to do.
Speaker 1: You said you're falling out of love with him already.
Speaker 1: You're in a miserable place. You're just trying to make
Speaker 1: it work to take care of your child. You lost
Speaker 1: twenty pounds in a month being stressed, trying to figure
Speaker 1: out where your next check don't come from. Then also,
Speaker 1: you got this man that you're taking care of and
Speaker 1: now his mother. You don't want to leave his mother
Speaker 1: hide in dry? Does he have any siblings? Does it?
Speaker 1: Is there any way that if you don't do it,
Speaker 1: he'll step up and fucking do it.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: That's a big responsibility. You let her put your name
Speaker 1: down as emergency contact. You got your own shit going on, baby,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Where's your mom, where's your family?
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. What I'm saying, this is
Speaker 2: not good.
Speaker 1: And then the first thing that you said, So, I've
Speaker 1: been with my fiance for a year and a half
Speaker 1: and it's been pure hell. He proposed to you with
Speaker 1: no intention on giving you a fucking wedding. You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. And I'm saying that because look at
Speaker 1: the place you're in right now. If he can't even
Speaker 1: pay bills, how the fuck he gonna pay for a
Speaker 1: fucking wedding.
Speaker 2: How it needs you to understand that?
Speaker 1: Hold up, Hold up, I know the shit getting good,
Speaker 1: but listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial.
Speaker 1: If you love me, you'll listen. Your fiance for a
Speaker 1: year and a half. That shit ain't supposed to be
Speaker 1: going bed that soon. But it's still situations that could
Speaker 1: be worse, that are worse than yours. So you're not
Speaker 1: completely in the goddamn dumps.
Speaker 2: No you're not.
Speaker 1: If you still got good credit, you still got breath
Speaker 1: to breathe every time you wake up, you have a
Speaker 1: chance to change your situation.
Speaker 2: There you go.
Speaker 1: And the reason why I say credit is because you
Speaker 1: need to get the hell out of there and get
Speaker 1: into your own shit. Still, you need to get another car,
Speaker 1: all right, You donna let Jody crash and goddamn car up.
Speaker 1: Yes I called him Jody, Yes I did. Event I
Speaker 1: called him Jody, and you didn't let this nigga joey you.
Speaker 1: That's what it is. I ain't mad at him. I'm
Speaker 1: mad at jo ass, yes i am. But unlike my
Speaker 1: brother Charlemagne, I'm not gonna give you dunky other day
Speaker 1: because we live and we fucking learn. We live and
Speaker 1: we fucking learned, and you got a great blessing out
Speaker 1: the deal when that is your baby.
Speaker 2: So we will always move forward with grace.
Speaker 1: But listen, it ain't like he gonna be fighting for
Speaker 1: custody and taking you downtown for child support, baby, and
Speaker 1: he ain't even got a leg to stand on, you know,
Speaker 1: So we just pray for him and you keep it moving,
Speaker 1: You keep it the fuck moving, and you don't look back.
Speaker 1: Don't look back in that way. I don't mean you
Speaker 1: got to cut all ties with him, because he's still
Speaker 1: your child's father and you still have a great amount
Speaker 1: of love for him, but have enough love for him
Speaker 1: to leave his ASTs all the way alone. And let
Speaker 1: him get hisself together, because you can't make him get
Speaker 1: hisself together. You gotta let him get itself together, and
Speaker 1: you can't make your child a part of that, that toxicity,
Speaker 1: that that whole little situation going on, okay, because you
Speaker 1: gotta do it all for your baby. You gotta be
Speaker 1: mentally prepared for motherhood. You know, you got a child
Speaker 1: to raise. So shit is real, all right, Shit is real.
Speaker 1: Shit is real for you every day, all right. So
Speaker 1: I need you to check in with me. Well, the
Speaker 1: advice is straight up to fucking leave. I'm sorry, make
Speaker 1: him take care of his mother. Will let him take
Speaker 1: care of his mother. He ain't gonna let her get
Speaker 1: so sick where she just you know, you know, she
Speaker 1: just fucking croak. You know, if it's if it's you
Speaker 1: know where, if that's in his control, you know, he
Speaker 1: can take care of his mother. You need you are
Speaker 1: a mother, You need to take care of your.
Speaker 2: Child because he can't do that with you. Right now,
Speaker 2: check back in with me.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna need to know because I'm I'm I need
Speaker 1: you to get the fuck up out of their baby.
Speaker 1: And we're moving on. This is from another woman, and
Speaker 1: there is no voice memo. She oh god, she got emoji.
Speaker 1: She really about the main this shit. Okay, hey, jas,
Speaker 1: I just wanted to say that I'm proud of you girl,
Speaker 1: keep doing your thing, but I need help with my mets.
Speaker 1: So I was dating this guy for about three weeks. Okay,
Speaker 1: the vibes was there, he cooked for me, we had drinks.
Speaker 2: I really like him.
Speaker 1: This nigga dropped the love bomb on me after the
Speaker 1: first week. But the nigga threw up a red flag
Speaker 1: two of them shits. I have two jobs, two kids,
Speaker 1: in a house that I'm putting back together. The nigga
Speaker 1: asked me to help him pay his rent that he's
Speaker 1: behind on eighteen hundred dollars.
Speaker 2: The fuck is he on? Then asked me could I
Speaker 2: apply for a loan to help him.
Speaker 1: I immediately fell some type of way because the fuck
Speaker 1: he kept saying, Babe, I just want you to have
Speaker 1: my back and love on me and do what I say.
Speaker 2: He and me fucked up, Jess, I'm too independent for
Speaker 2: this nigga.
Speaker 1: So he snapped on me because I said I'm not
Speaker 1: helping him out, like it's only been three weeks, and
Speaker 1: I honestly feel disrespected.
Speaker 2: It's the audacity for me?
Speaker 1: Then what makes it so bad is I caught feelings
Speaker 1: for his dinosaur dick ass, Jess, I listened to your
Speaker 1: show every time you drop episode.
Speaker 2: Does it the okay? Well? Thank you? You ain't just
Speaker 2: going hold up?
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, time out, flag on the play? Can
Speaker 1: we just go back to our corners real quick? How
Speaker 1: the fuck are you gonna go from?
Speaker 2: She said? It's audacity for me? Then what makes it
Speaker 2: so bad? As I fell for his y.
Speaker 1: I caught feelings for his dick ass, Jess, I listen
Speaker 1: to your show every time you drop episode. That's just
Speaker 1: how we're gonna end it, baby, all right?
Speaker 2: So she listening right now?
Speaker 1: So I gotta help you. I gotta help you. Boy,
Speaker 1: I get it. And you're so pretty. I'm looking at
Speaker 1: your page, your profile, you so pretty? All right, girl,
Speaker 1: here we go here, it's all right. I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: tell you, don't don't beat yourself up for falling for
Speaker 1: the dinosaur dick girl, Please don't.
Speaker 2: I don't. It's alright.
Speaker 1: Sometimes we get a little weakned knees for a little
Speaker 1: dinosaur dane LINGI it's all right, sorry, I'm glad you
Speaker 1: listened to my episode. My episodes every time I drop one,
Speaker 1: and this one is for you baby. Now we got
Speaker 1: a commercial and if you click off this podcast, I
Speaker 1: swear I'm gonna beat your ass.
Speaker 2: Listen, all right, so.
Speaker 1: You seem to be very smart, all right, and look
Speaker 1: at the three weeks girl.
Speaker 2: Look that's a flex. She had a nigga time about
Speaker 2: he love you, all right.
Speaker 1: What's not a flex is him saying he loves you
Speaker 1: and then following up what all this extra bills and
Speaker 1: expenses bullshit that he got going on? Like he just
Speaker 1: reade drop all of that shit in your lab after
Speaker 1: three weeks.
Speaker 2: So this was either his plan because this is what
Speaker 2: he does.
Speaker 1: He saw you, he know, he know the power of
Speaker 1: his Dino dick, and he just was able to win
Speaker 1: you over.
Speaker 2: You know, we got.
Speaker 1: Guys like that, guys that prey on successful women with
Speaker 1: good hearts who like to save people. This is the
Speaker 1: same girl from the last story put on her save
Speaker 1: a whole cake, and now she and the gutter right
Speaker 1: next to the niggadamnnar in the goddamn gutter with a
Speaker 1: baby taking care of his mother and him, and he'dne
Speaker 1: fucked up her credit.
Speaker 2: Her life is and shambles and all this shit.
Speaker 1: That's what happens when you go from being a superhero
Speaker 1: and now you are a hurt villain. That's some bullshit,
Speaker 1: ain't it. That's like the story of the Joker. Everybody
Speaker 1: got a story, right, Every villain has a story because
Speaker 1: every villain wasn't born bad. They were born great and
Speaker 1: they were actually saving people at first, and then they
Speaker 1: got fucked over, and then that that that hurt people,
Speaker 1: hurt people, shit them kicked in and now you're a villain. Well,
Speaker 1: I don't want you to be a villain, young lady.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want you to hurt the next nigga because
Speaker 1: this nigga was a trash ball, because that's exactly what
Speaker 1: it is. First of all, I don't doubt that he
Speaker 1: loved you. After three weeks. You probably got good conversation.
Speaker 1: You probably different, you know, with all the shit that
Speaker 1: he told you, Yet you different.
Speaker 2: I ain't never hurting nobody like.
Speaker 1: You, like you really got good pussy pussy like you
Speaker 1: know he probably could have, you know, the match to
Speaker 1: Donald Dick.
Speaker 2: I know you got some nice spicy pussy.
Speaker 1: So y'all, sex life was already booming all right the
Speaker 1: red flag you seem to know.
Speaker 2: I see. I hate giving advice to people who already
Speaker 2: know what the fuck.
Speaker 1: Going on, because you are, like I said, like I
Speaker 1: said in the last story, maybe you just need your
Speaker 1: bullshit regurgitated back to you so you know what you
Speaker 1: need to do. You just need to move the fuck on.
Speaker 1: You said he cooked for you, y'all had drinks and
Speaker 1: you really liked them. That's good. That's a part of
Speaker 1: his plan. That's the part of his plan. The only
Speaker 1: thing he didn't give you was no money. That's because
Speaker 1: he had nail money to give you. You had all
Speaker 1: the money to get back. He ended up billing you
Speaker 1: for that dinner that he cooked for all that Donald
Speaker 1: dingling he'd been dropping off, and them good drinks. That's
Speaker 1: your bill. Now you got a goddamn bill, eighteen hundred dollars.
Speaker 1: You need to help them pay his rent. And this
Speaker 1: is how niggas think. You have two jobs, two kids,
Speaker 1: and a house that you're putting back together. So that
Speaker 1: shit must have got blown down by the last nigga.
Speaker 1: Here come another.
Speaker 2: Nigga trying to blow down this house.
Speaker 1: You're gonna let them, or what you're gonna do you're
Speaker 1: gonna dust off your cap and save your goddamn self.
Speaker 1: Don't keep saving these niggas, bitch and not saying you.
Speaker 1: I'm just speaking into the universe. Stop saving these niggas, bitches.
Speaker 1: That's what I need for y'all to, you know, and
Speaker 1: I can be all nice and wholesome with you.
Speaker 2: Stop saving these guys ladies.
Speaker 1: But y'all don't understand when somebody talked to y'all like that,
Speaker 1: because that's how you fucking almost ended up paying an
Speaker 1: eighteen hundred dollars rent that wasn't mean yours while try
Speaker 1: to put your house back together. So yeah, I'm yelling
Speaker 1: at you because I ain't mad at this nigga. I'm
Speaker 1: mad at you because something tells me that if you
Speaker 1: still asking for advice, that you're still fucking with this
Speaker 1: nigga here and there after that little three weeks and
Speaker 1: you probably didn't pay eighteen hundred, but you probably gave
Speaker 1: him eight hundred toward the eighteen.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: You need to tell me if I'm right, because you
Speaker 1: talking to me now, you're talking to me, or don't
Speaker 1: don't bullshit me. You didne did something to help this nigga.
Speaker 1: All right, you did something and that's probably why you
Speaker 1: feel disrespected. And it's only been three weeks and you
Speaker 1: upset because you caught feelings because you know, no, you
Speaker 1: didn't help this nigga. You help them, and it don't
Speaker 1: look like he made a change or he going do
Speaker 1: anything to.
Speaker 2: Pay you back.
Speaker 1: It don't look it, don't it don't look too good
Speaker 1: you either let her move in that goddamn house.
Speaker 2: It's something something you ain't telling me. Now. You're gonna
Speaker 2: have to come back and.
Speaker 1: Tell me, because I know you, because I was you before,
Speaker 1: and I don't want you to be how I was
Speaker 1: any longer. So I'm gonna need you to tell me
Speaker 1: what I'm missing out of here, what you failed to
Speaker 1: tell me. You to help this nigga out, and you
Speaker 1: need to stop for you end up like the girl
Speaker 1: from the first story who ended up pregnant and had
Speaker 1: a baby by a nigga who she had to take
Speaker 1: care of. So now she got two damn kids, the
Speaker 1: baby and the father. That's not where you want to
Speaker 1: end You want to end up in the gutter. You
Speaker 1: don't want to end up in the gutter with a baby,
Speaker 1: but sometimes that happens, and I'll continue to pray for
Speaker 1: you if you end up there, because my sister's looking
Speaker 1: at me like this, You being too hard on it,
Speaker 1: all right, So I don't want to be too hard.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna pray.
Speaker 1: For you and I love you, but I know you're
Speaker 1: lying to me about something, something you're holding back. So
Speaker 1: you me every thing, tell me, and just like that,
Speaker 1: we've come to the end of another. Carefully replace with
Speaker 1: your girl, Jesselarius, fix and mess the way I'll be
Speaker 1: fixing it each and every Wednesday. Make sure you catch
Speaker 1: me on iHeart Spotify, Apple podcasts, anywhere you can catch
Speaker 1: a podcast at you can catch mine, and in my
Speaker 1: deepest Pam Voice can't Fully Reckless is a production of
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