Speaker 1: Forever.
Speaker 2: Hey, guys, so good to be here. You know on time?
Speaker 1: What time did you arrive? Friend? At twelve twenty? Wow?
Speaker 1: And Andrew, you arrived exact?
Speaker 3: Oh my, oh god, eleven for I arrived at twelve
Speaker 3: fifty now twelve now, So my apologies friend, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 3: And oh I was awake early today because I hadn't.
Speaker 3: I was awake early. I don't have an excuse. I
Speaker 3: do not have one.
Speaker 1: He was awake early.
Speaker 3: I was got up early this morning. What time did
Speaker 3: you get up? I got up at eight something?
Speaker 1: Why so early, Marie?
Speaker 3: Well, since I had an interesting evening and I had
Speaker 3: to wake up early to reflect my soul.
Speaker 1: What my soul was like? No, niggas, Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I no, you don't deserve all this rest. I can't
Speaker 1: even wow. I well, we'll get into it.
Speaker 2: But yeah, Mari's late, and we text her like, hey,
Speaker 2: where are you?
Speaker 1: No, I didn't get text from you guys saying where
Speaker 1: are you?
Speaker 4: Not?
Speaker 1: Where are you?
Speaker 3: But no, I hit you guys twelve twenty something and
Speaker 3: said I'll be there in ten to fifteen minutes.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, she Oh Marie, tell them what you told
Speaker 1: me to do? Well?
Speaker 3: I mean you were like, Wow, can't believe like you
Speaker 3: sent me a very mean emoji, and I was like, sorry,
Speaker 3: record some ads or something, so the studio time is
Speaker 3: not going to waste, you know, right we in here.
Speaker 3: I had already did that. I was on I was listen.
Speaker 3: I was vacationing out of the country. Didn't know when
Speaker 3: the ads got recorded.
Speaker 2: So oh well, I mean, if you listen to our episodes,
Speaker 2: you know that they've been recorded. I don't know what
Speaker 2: you're saying, friend, h exactly, I have no idea what
Speaker 2: you're saying to me right now coming you're coming in hot.
Speaker 1: It's too hot outside for all this heat in here.
Speaker 2: Anyways, Marie's back. We're so happy. We're so excited.
Speaker 1: It sounds so stoked.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, we're so excited to hear all of everything.
Speaker 1: Wow, the e prey ho. But wait before you get
Speaker 1: into that, what happened last night?
Speaker 3: Well, sis, you're speaking of v prey ho. I said,
Speaker 3: let me go get some dick tonight. And that was
Speaker 3: last night.
Speaker 1: And I uh.
Speaker 3: Matched with this dude earlier in the day and we
Speaker 3: had been talking and I was like, is he cuted?
Speaker 1: And I sent his photo to Carolina and she was like,
Speaker 1: he's hot. Can I see him? How come do you?
Speaker 1: Maria always messages everybody.
Speaker 3: Else, only message Carolina and Andre because they don't sex
Speaker 3: or dick shame me.
Speaker 2: You do that, you did, you'd be dick shaming. You'd
Speaker 2: be like, you'd be like him. That person ain't no
Speaker 2: black people.
Speaker 3: So anyway, Carolina and Andre are my two messiest because
Speaker 3: they have no.
Speaker 1: Stand They won't shame me.
Speaker 2: No, they don't shame her because they will literally fuck
Speaker 2: a wall so she feels safe.
Speaker 3: It's not about well me banging a wall doesn't make
Speaker 3: me feel safe. Sis that unless there's a chair there. Anyway,
Speaker 3: Look listen, So I matched with this dude and I
Speaker 3: got real high last night and it was really late
Speaker 3: in It was like eleven o'clock and we had been
Speaker 3: talking back and forth and he was like he was like, so,
Speaker 3: I guess you're not coming and I was like, uh.
Speaker 1: He was like, or do you need me to come
Speaker 1: get you? And I was like, oh, it's a left driver.
Speaker 1: And I was like, ah. If he hadn't, if he
Speaker 1: didn't come pick me up, I would not have gone wait,
Speaker 1: can I see a picture? How abut I tell you who?
Speaker 1: I play him?
Speaker 4: In the movie.
Speaker 1: Okay, Oh my god, he's missing his eyes.
Speaker 3: You're playing in a movie, Mario, Will you say it's
Speaker 3: just a friend like bigger, but like bigger, like buff,
Speaker 3: like buff, but like when he took his shirt off,
Speaker 3: wasn't buff.
Speaker 2: Like all you do is shoulders, like you don't do nothing,
Speaker 2: you don't do nothing else.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, all right, So this, so he came
Speaker 1: to pick me up.
Speaker 2: So this pillowcase looking uber driver came and picked you up.
Speaker 1: Pillowcase braid my hair, came and picked me up. And
Speaker 1: you know, I made him wait for ten minutes outside.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 3: And then when I got down, I was like, what
Speaker 3: kind of car you drive? He was like a Mustang
Speaker 3: And I was like, oh so.
Speaker 1: He forty five?
Speaker 3: The dudes no his Okay, so his profile says twenty seven, right,
Speaker 3: m hm.
Speaker 1: So I get in the car and I'm and it's
Speaker 1: weird already. It's weird. I should not have gone right.
Speaker 1: I don't know this man.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to do vacation eat prey host stuff in
Speaker 3: my neighborhood and that doesn't stupid, doesn't make sense. But
Speaker 3: if we fucking love for the pod, I mean for
Speaker 3: the podcast, yes, but for my g So I'm in
Speaker 3: his car and it's like awkward silence, you know. So
Speaker 3: I'm like, ah, well.
Speaker 1: What do you do?
Speaker 3: He was like, I'm a junior architect and I was like,
Speaker 3: what does that mean? He was like, do you know
Speaker 3: what an architect is?
Speaker 1: I was like yeah. He was like, I'm the junior
Speaker 1: that and I was like, so what do you do?
Speaker 2: He was definitely lying because he could not tell me
Speaker 2: what an architect did.
Speaker 1: How come you're nation all this ship up top sis On.
Speaker 2: His profile he says junior architect twenty seven. So in
Speaker 2: the car, I'm like, well, what do you do? Well?
Speaker 1: You just wait look hard to verify.
Speaker 3: Less insists everything that I did last night was foolish
Speaker 3: and I should not be here right now, right right.
Speaker 3: So we get to his house. He lives alone. It's
Speaker 3: a studios, like a uh don't let yeah, okay, like
Speaker 3: fifteen minutes from my house, so too close, it's too
Speaker 3: close to me. We get there, I'm like, what is
Speaker 3: this like a weird like halfway house?
Speaker 1: Think it was weird? Everything?
Speaker 3: Uh, everything was just awkward. I think he was no
Speaker 3: shade to the people who are, but I think he
Speaker 3: was a little bit on the spectrum because he was
Speaker 3: very awkward and very like, couldn't make eye contact.
Speaker 1: He also needed glasses. He was very blind.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but them autistic got the strength Dick aut Dick
Speaker 2: is strong autistic.
Speaker 3: Well, let me talk about his autistic. TWA's not good.
Speaker 3: We never kissed. We never kissed, oh my, which is strange.
Speaker 3: I was there for like fifteen minutes and then I
Speaker 3: was like, I got to go home because he was
Speaker 3: like so he's like, we're hooking up.
Speaker 1: A little bit and he's like, let me see your tongue.
Speaker 3: And I was like, sir, I didn't come here to
Speaker 3: suck your duke, so that's not gonna happen. And he
Speaker 3: was like what. And I was like, here's a better idea.
Speaker 3: How about I sit on your face? And he was like,
Speaker 3: how is that the same thing?
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh my god, he's really he
Speaker 2: really is twenty seven, he might be twenty two.
Speaker 1: I was like, you know what, my stomach hurts. I
Speaker 1: gotta go. He was like, what you feel like you need?
Speaker 1: He's like, no, this was me. It was.
Speaker 3: I was like, I'm not gonna come tonight, so I
Speaker 3: gotta go right If I'm not gonna come, I'm gonna go.
Speaker 3: So I was like, uh what.
Speaker 1: My stomach hurts. I don't feel good. He was like,
Speaker 1: you think you need to throw up?
Speaker 2: I was like, I think I need a pooh boo.
Speaker 2: And then I went to order an uber but he
Speaker 2: dropped me off at my house so door to do
Speaker 2: a service. Wait, and then he's asking me all these
Speaker 2: questions like I see you out of blue, check on
Speaker 2: your on your Instagram?
Speaker 1: What do you do?
Speaker 3: I was like, sir, you are asking these questions too
Speaker 3: late to ask these before you were inside me.
Speaker 1: So wait, So he was inside you and then you
Speaker 1: were like, no, no, it wasn't It wasn't good.
Speaker 3: I was like, I was like, I should not be here, okay,
Speaker 3: and this is not gonna end well for me.
Speaker 1: One of us is gonna come and it's not gonna
Speaker 1: be me. So I'm gonna leave immediately. When you said
Speaker 1: you shouldn't be there, I was like, how did you
Speaker 1: get it? Nobody's supposed to be anyway.
Speaker 4: So I left.
Speaker 1: He dropped me off and I'm like, is he a psycho?
Speaker 3: Like you knows where I live? I deleted my tender
Speaker 3: last night. That's what I did.
Speaker 4: I chatter.
Speaker 3: That's how bad it was tenderest for vacations only.
Speaker 1: I'm still on a hinge.
Speaker 3: I feel like back in New York. What I want
Speaker 3: now is a summer fling, right, So I feel like
Speaker 3: on hinges. We have conversations, then we go get a drink,
Speaker 3: and then maybe we sleep together. But last night was
Speaker 3: conversation car house, back in the car.
Speaker 1: Home, So you're reckless, though.
Speaker 2: I know I am reckless and I got home and
Speaker 2: audience supervision. That's why you need to be messaging me, bitch.
Speaker 2: You messaged in Carolina, Carolina.
Speaker 1: I didn't.
Speaker 3: I have not spoken to Andre about this yet. So
Speaker 3: Carolina was We were on the phone all day yesterday,
Speaker 3: so she naturally is the person that I was talking
Speaker 3: to about this. She was like, call me in the
Speaker 3: morning when you get home after sex. I called her
Speaker 3: literally an.
Speaker 1: Hour after that, and she was like, uh, what happened? Wait?
Speaker 1: So I was like, nothing good. I am supportive of
Speaker 1: the hoeing. If you would have dropped a pin, I
Speaker 1: would have been there. I would have been outside his house.
Speaker 1: That's not the support I need. Friend. I don't need you.
Speaker 3: I don't need to drop a pin in you to
Speaker 3: be for you to be there when I come outside.
Speaker 3: I don't need you walk of shame, shaman.
Speaker 2: I wasn't gonna shore. I'd be like ready to fight.
Speaker 2: Read it's about to be girl frighten the city city.
Speaker 2: He would literally blow on you and you would fall
Speaker 2: down the seats.
Speaker 1: Sydney.
Speaker 3: You would shout you humpty dumpty. He would humpty dumpty
Speaker 3: that ass.
Speaker 4: Oh.
Speaker 2: I would have left eye his ship and you know,
Speaker 2: a lot of match, okay, but light is.
Speaker 1: Shout out to a little kim. He said, my god,
Speaker 1: I'm anyway. So that was last night.
Speaker 3: But all of the hoeing that I did internationally, I
Speaker 3: think I was a little bit smarter.
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter. You don't need to be smart. It's
Speaker 2: just you need to make sure you're safe. Yeah, smartnes
Speaker 2: doesn't have anything yesterday. No, smart and safe do go
Speaker 2: hand in hand. If you're not smart, you're not safe
Speaker 2: if you if you're smart, you might not fuck But
Speaker 2: if you safe, you might fucking get out safely.
Speaker 1: No, if you're smart, you wouldn't go in the first place.
Speaker 1: I should.
Speaker 3: I should have stayed my high ass in the house
Speaker 3: and watched finished watching a fin line between Love and Hate,
Speaker 3: because that's what I was gonna do.
Speaker 2: And then I was like, I knew you was about
Speaker 2: to do something shady because I messed you.
Speaker 1: I was like, what you're doing tonight? Silence. I was like, oh.
Speaker 2: I started to text you back and I was on
Speaker 2: FaceTime with Carolina, so I was like silence. I was like,
Speaker 2: I know what that is. She about to go out
Speaker 2: there and do her side gig.
Speaker 1: Now this is my main gig. You know I'm unemployed.
Speaker 1: This is my main gig.
Speaker 3: Anyway, I tried to repeat something that worked for me
Speaker 3: in Amsterdam and this was not that.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, this wasn't it.
Speaker 2: I mean, the people have literally been on the edge
Speaker 2: of the seats about what the fuck happened?
Speaker 1: So tell everybody about the stories.
Speaker 2: This is this story, this episode is it's all about
Speaker 2: Marie re re re re forget about me, me me Sorry.
Speaker 1: If we just go back a couple.
Speaker 3: Of weeks, there was an episode that was all about you,
Speaker 3: and it was about you being arrested, and we sat
Speaker 3: through that hilarious story of your struggle and it was
Speaker 3: all about you.
Speaker 1: You you you you.
Speaker 2: Singing I'm here. I'm also I'm on the same key
Speaker 2: as you. I want to hear everything same note, I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: I truly know nothing. Oh you know some I don't know.
Speaker 1: You know that. When I went to London, I match
Speaker 1: with this man.
Speaker 2: Start exactly off where you started with the e Prey
Speaker 2: host trip.
Speaker 1: They want to know where you started. Okay, So I started.
Speaker 3: I thought I was going to be in the same
Speaker 3: part of France the whole three weeks, but after four
Speaker 3: days I was like, I gotta.
Speaker 1: Get the hell out of here. This place sucks. My
Speaker 1: Sis got options. Okay, Sis went to Switzerland.
Speaker 3: Okay, yum chocolate factory, cheese museum, doing all that cool
Speaker 3: Swiss stuff. But that doesn't matter. I didn't bang nobody
Speaker 3: in know those places. I get to London. I match
Speaker 3: with this guy. He's like his profile said Fridays are
Speaker 3: for shopping and eating, and.
Speaker 1: I was like, today's Friday. Yeah. So I matched with
Speaker 1: him and he's like, what are you doing today?
Speaker 3: I was like eating and shopping and he was like,
Speaker 3: you look like you need some new agent provocateur.
Speaker 1: And I was like, yes, I do. You're buying nine
Speaker 1: hundred dollar panties stupid. I was like, yes, I do,
Speaker 1: absolutely obviously.
Speaker 3: So you were supposed to meet up and am I
Speaker 3: telling the story, How I told you the story.
Speaker 1: I'm not telling the story. How you told me the story?
Speaker 1: How I told you? Okay, great, got it.
Speaker 3: So meet up with this guy and he's exactly what
Speaker 3: you think he is. He's exactly what you think a
Speaker 3: man who would offer to buy a stranger panties is.
Speaker 3: He's white and short, and we go.
Speaker 1: In and uh, it's kind.
Speaker 3: Of awkward, but also like sis, you know, when when
Speaker 3: in Rome or when in London. So I'm picking up
Speaker 3: all the stuff that I think is attractive and everything
Speaker 3: that I think is gonna make my butt look big,
Speaker 3: and I'm like.
Speaker 1: Sor do you need me to see? Do you need
Speaker 1: to see me trying this stuff on? You know, I
Speaker 1: got time.
Speaker 3: I loationed my butt today, so you know, it's a
Speaker 3: little bit of a fashion show for him.
Speaker 1: We get to the register thousands upon thousands of dollars
Speaker 1: and his card gets declined. Oh that was fun for me.
Speaker 3: I think that the whole ruse there is his card
Speaker 3: always gets the client and he just wants to see
Speaker 3: people in lingerie for free.
Speaker 2: It's so smart. He's brilliant, genius and I'm gonna do that,
Speaker 2: are you?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 3: But not at agent provocateur udea do it at Claire's successorness.
Speaker 1: We're gonna be a rainbow. Rainbow got a lingerie section
Speaker 1: into baby.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 3: So then I matched with this black dude, beautiful, bearded,
Speaker 3: his hair, he has all his hair like hot. He
Speaker 3: tells me that I'm beautiful. I'm like, thank you, sir,
Speaker 3: you're beautiful. Also, he asked me how long I'm in
Speaker 3: London for. I'm like, oh, for two more days or
Speaker 3: something stupid like that. He unmatched me. He unmatched me,
Speaker 3: so that I matched with this German dude who's like
Speaker 3: tall and looks like a model, right, he German. The
Speaker 3: date was boring, but we go to this bar to
Speaker 3: get some drinks and this like hotel lobby and we
Speaker 3: sit down and as soon as we sit down, the
Speaker 3: bartender is the black dude who unmatched me.
Speaker 1: Oh my fucking gosh looking sexies ever just so hot.
Speaker 3: Oh so beautiful, like beautiful, he had all his teeth
Speaker 3: and everything. I was like, ah, but I already sat down,
Speaker 3: and I can't. I mean, there's no way that I
Speaker 3: in my mind that I can play off us moving Hey.
Speaker 1: A guy that I don't really care about, a guy
Speaker 1: that I do, like, is here can we leave? I
Speaker 1: didn't say that.
Speaker 3: Instead, I sat there in this bartender's line of sight
Speaker 3: and laughed really hard all night.
Speaker 5: Just ha.
Speaker 1: Funniest job I've ever heard, screaming.
Speaker 3: So finally, this white dude goes away to go to
Speaker 3: the bathroom and I'm like, well, I'm pop up and
Speaker 3: talk to my friend. So I jump up and I
Speaker 3: go to the bar and I'm like, hey, can I
Speaker 3: have my tabs? W I can close out? And he's like, yeah,
Speaker 3: what's next after this?
Speaker 1: What are your plans? I'm like, what are my plans?
Speaker 3: And I start to say to him, you look really familiar.
Speaker 3: I think it's because you unmatched me.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: And right when I start to say that, the white
Speaker 3: dude comes back upstairs and he's like what's going on?
Speaker 1: And I'm like, ah, freaking hey, white dude.
Speaker 3: So I let him walk me back to my hotel
Speaker 3: and I was like, I was gonna double back and
Speaker 3: go see that bartender.
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, what if it wasn't him?
Speaker 1: It was definitely it was him. Yeah, Marie, what the fuck?
Speaker 1: How did you drop the ball on that Cabby? I'm
Speaker 1: so dumb. You could have made a three pointer right there.
Speaker 1: But he matched me and I was so upset about him.
Speaker 1: It was him playing hard to get bitch.
Speaker 2: No, he he wants like a wife. He's he's trying
Speaker 2: to get his inderes elbow on.
Speaker 1: He wants a wife.
Speaker 3: Anyway, So I ended up having sex with somebody else
Speaker 3: and it was the worst sex in my life.
Speaker 1: Okay, please explain. It was this little Italian man and
Speaker 1: I know, and I know I did it wrong.
Speaker 3: Right, I'm in London. I should have banged a dude
Speaker 3: from the UK. I banged an Italian that don't speak
Speaker 3: no English. His name was just seppy. His hair was
Speaker 3: too long for him to be like laying on top
Speaker 3: of me. It was the worst sex I've ever had
Speaker 3: in my life. Literally, while it was happening, I was like,
Speaker 3: is he inside me?
Speaker 2: I was like this, this ain't sex. This is wrong right,
Speaker 2: And his body was squishy.
Speaker 1: I was like.
Speaker 3: He had no idea what he was doing. I'm pretty
Speaker 3: sure he was a virgin. He was twenty six years old.
Speaker 3: He must have been a virgin. There's no way you're
Speaker 3: that bad at sex, because he tricked me right, Like
Speaker 3: the kisses were like good.
Speaker 1: You were like, oh, Okay, wow, he might he might
Speaker 1: go know what he's doing right.
Speaker 4: Oh my god?
Speaker 1: Because Italians are good at flirting. What does top lip
Speaker 1: look like? Though?
Speaker 3: What does top lip look like? I don't remember, sis,
Speaker 3: I don't remember, but he looked like do y'all remember
Speaker 3: the Tarzan cartoon. He looked like that, like if Tarzan,
Speaker 3: that's who? Yes, But I didn't say that the guy
Speaker 3: was ugly. I said the dick was ugly, like the
Speaker 3: sex was bad, That's.
Speaker 1: What I'm saying. But he was short. He was maybe
Speaker 1: like five six, five seven, five to seven. If you
Speaker 1: guys can't hear Andrew, he said, that's tragic.
Speaker 3: Honestly, I think all men are short though, so he
Speaker 3: might have been five nine, but I'm saying he wasn't tall.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 3: He spoke no English and just kept saying I love you,
Speaker 3: and I was like, you have.
Speaker 1: You got to go, so after it's over, after you
Speaker 1: even give you that.
Speaker 3: Since in my hotel room, I was like I should
Speaker 3: get out of here, like I gotta go, Like that's how.
Speaker 1: Bad it was.
Speaker 3: I was like I should leave, And the next day
Speaker 3: I left. So what kept happening is I would have
Speaker 3: sex with these people and then fly out the.
Speaker 1: Day after because I was like, I don't want to
Speaker 1: see this. You're so brilliant again.
Speaker 3: So after London, I went to Amsterdam, had the best
Speaker 3: sex of my life there.
Speaker 2: Okay, finally something we could get into talk about that fabulous.
Speaker 3: Okay, So it was the same thing. Right, I'm on tinder,
Speaker 3: I'm leaving the next day. I'm like, I gotta get
Speaker 3: some amster dick.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 3: So I had went out on a day okay. So
Speaker 3: I was standing on the canal looking at the dirty
Speaker 3: ass water. I heard a voice behind me go, It's beautiful,
Speaker 3: isn't it. I was like, this is about to be.
Speaker 1: Some maid in Manhattan type bs. I turn around.
Speaker 3: It's a white man who's way too confident to be
Speaker 3: talking to me, like, way too cocky to be like
Speaker 3: that comfortable talking to me. And I'm like, yeah, it's beautiful.
Speaker 3: And he asked sick me to dinner. I let him,
Speaker 3: and then he's boring, so I let him pay, and
Speaker 3: then I.
Speaker 1: Was like I'm going home right to jump on tender.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 3: I let him feed me, and then I was going
Speaker 3: home smart right, genius. So he's like, oh, I'll walk you,
Speaker 3: it's no problem, and I'm like, all right, I'm leaving
Speaker 3: him at the door.
Speaker 1: Okay, right.
Speaker 3: So we get to my house and I'm like, all right,
Speaker 3: thanks for walking me. He's like, you're not gonna invite
Speaker 3: me in. I was like, absolutely not, and I left
Speaker 3: him on the sidewalk right beautiful. He was like, I'll
Speaker 3: call you tomorrow. I was like, no, no, we're not
Speaker 3: gonna speak.
Speaker 1: My phone is gonna be cut us. I don't have
Speaker 1: any data for the rest of my trip.
Speaker 3: So I jump on tender and I mated with this
Speaker 3: dude who's very attractive, like a sexy movie star type.
Speaker 1: Man. Right, you have a picture? No, so I very
Speaker 1: I deleted Tender.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 1: So I met with this guy. We're talking. I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: what you know? You close right because I'm like, I
Speaker 1: have to get this done before I leave.
Speaker 2: He's like, oh, before you come over here, I need
Speaker 2: to tell you that I used to be a professional
Speaker 2: skateboarder or something stupid like that.
Speaker 1: He was like, and I broke my back.
Speaker 3: He's like, I could still walk in stuff, but you
Speaker 3: know i'd be tired, so i'd be in a wheelchair.
Speaker 3: I was like, ah, this crippledigga hit you with the
Speaker 3: best dick in your life. But no, no, no, that's said.
Speaker 3: I said, I'm not coming. He was like what, He's like,
Speaker 3: everything still works. I was like, I don't care. He
Speaker 3: was like, I prove it. I said, you don't have
Speaker 3: anything to prove to me. I've had bad sex with
Speaker 3: people with good backs.
Speaker 2: I'm not about to have you tell me or try
Speaker 2: to prove to me with your bad back that you
Speaker 2: got good dick.
Speaker 1: I was like, it's it's you don't have to prove
Speaker 1: any nothing. He's like, oh haha.
Speaker 3: I think he's like, I feel like you're you're gonna
Speaker 3: miss out on something. I was like, I'm not coming
Speaker 3: to your broken house. No, I'm not coming.
Speaker 1: I'm not coming.
Speaker 2: I'm not walking up the ramp to your house. It's
Speaker 2: not in a wheelchair. He's in a wheelchair. So I'm
Speaker 2: acted with this other dude. Okay, that dude unmatching me,
Speaker 2: the one in the chair. You thought I got good
Speaker 2: dick from a dude from Professor X.
Speaker 1: That's what I thought.
Speaker 2: Hey, this has been up and down, bitch. This has
Speaker 2: been a roller coaster. I know.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to tell you the story. So I matched
Speaker 1: with this guy.
Speaker 3: He's the most Dutch looking person that you could probably
Speaker 3: imagine in the world. His name has like mad consonants
Speaker 3: in it and like a vowel. And he's like, was
Speaker 3: it all sex, drugs and rock and roll.
Speaker 1: For you this trip?
Speaker 3: Or did you have time for some culture? And I
Speaker 3: was like, I got some culture, I did some drugs,
Speaker 3: haven't done any sex stuff yet. And he was like, well,
Speaker 3: what are you waiting for. I was like, you to
Speaker 3: send me your address and he was like.
Speaker 1: Right, Marie, when did you become I said.
Speaker 3: That, and I dropped my phone and was like, I
Speaker 3: like left it. I typed it because I was like,
Speaker 3: that's what I As soon as he said what are
Speaker 3: you waiting for?
Speaker 1: I was like, aha, I got something for that ass.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, when did you become such a like
Speaker 2: professional at this in Amsterdam?
Speaker 3: So anyway, uh, He's like, if I send you my address,
Speaker 3: you'll come to my I was like, yep, was he hot?
Speaker 1: He was okay? And he was like, and you don't
Speaker 1: have a picture of him, Sydney, I deleted tender. You
Speaker 1: don't screenshot.
Speaker 2: Nobody screenshots anymore.
Speaker 1: I have a picture of this white man. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: show it to you right now. Anyway.
Speaker 2: So and and I wasn't gonna go.
Speaker 1: Okay, I wasn't gonna go.
Speaker 3: Andre was like he was like, yo, Dutch dudes got
Speaker 3: the have the best sex game. And I was like,
Speaker 3: shut up, Andre, like you a ho shut up? Yeah,
Speaker 3: and He's like Andre's no. But Andre was like he
Speaker 3: was like no.
Speaker 2: He was like he's gonna have a big dick and
Speaker 2: he's gonna have it's gonna be good sex.
Speaker 3: I was like, all right, whatever, Andre, I I'm gonna go.
Speaker 3: My flight was early in the morning, but I was like,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna make time. I get there and we.
Speaker 1: Talk, we have some tea. He builds boats. That's some
Speaker 1: real like Amsterdam job. He builds boats. The nurse. You
Speaker 1: regular ass dusty American men. Y'all don't do ship, you
Speaker 1: don't do anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't build boats, Like that's what fuck, that's why
Speaker 2: sexy be bad with you. Yeah, y'all need to start
Speaker 2: building some boats. Find a fucking hobby. Y'all need to
Speaker 2: start building some mother effing boats. This is this is him,
Speaker 2: so oh my god. Wow, right, very Dutch, very Dutch bitch.
Speaker 2: You got a he got like two filters on it, buddy,
Speaker 2: I could tell you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, Andrew, that's what he looks like. I
Speaker 3: mean he was a little redder than this, but that's what.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 3: Anyway, so we start making out. I'm like, this is weird.
Speaker 3: I don't really know this man. But then he just
Speaker 3: knew what he was doing.
Speaker 4: Sis. It was very good.
Speaker 3: Best sex I've ever had, was great in your entire life,
Speaker 3: in my entire life. So halfway through the sex, right
Speaker 3: or like kind of in the beginning of the sex,
Speaker 3: I hear him sniffing behind me, and I'm like, what
Speaker 3: you doing cocaine?
Speaker 1: And I turned around and he's he's like, have you
Speaker 1: heard of poppers?
Speaker 2: And I was like, I said, a straight white dude
Speaker 2: in Amsterdam is not about to teach me about no
Speaker 2: damn poppers.
Speaker 1: I said, yeah, I know about poppers. Oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: I do you want some? And I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I do.
Speaker 2: So we're doing these poppers, Sis, Magic Andrew.
Speaker 1: It's crazy. It's crazy. Wait, okay, explain what poppers feel like.
Speaker 1: I don't. I've never had poppers. I don't even know
Speaker 1: how to explain it.
Speaker 4: It felt.
Speaker 1: I mean, it doesn't last that long.
Speaker 3: It just but also it's like it's kind of like
Speaker 3: a head high, like a head body so high.
Speaker 1: It's cute.
Speaker 4: Sis.
Speaker 2: Anyway, so tell the people what you were telling me
Speaker 2: on the phone.
Speaker 1: Don't fucking hold back down, bitch, baby. So I was like, uh.
Speaker 3: I was like, oh my god, I feel like I
Speaker 3: feel like you're gonna make me squirt.
Speaker 1: And he was like, oh am.
Speaker 3: I SIS destroyed the mattress. I think he had to
Speaker 3: get a new mattress. Also, I think I ruined his TV.
Speaker 1: It was going far.
Speaker 2: You didn't tell me that the squirting, No, you told
Speaker 2: me about, sir, But the TV.
Speaker 3: Sis, it was awesome. After it's done, we're all tired.
Speaker 3: I'm all discombobulated, right. I floated above my body and
Speaker 3: I came.
Speaker 1: Back and your hair survived all that, baby, I mean,
Speaker 1: he wasn't doing it in my hair. Sis.
Speaker 3: It was great though, Like he knew exactly what he
Speaker 3: was doing. Every single thing that he did, he did
Speaker 3: it with a purpose. And I was like, this is
Speaker 3: what sex should be like with everybody.
Speaker 1: All the time.
Speaker 3: I'm like, well, what, like what is so great about?
Speaker 3: Like how do you know anyway, did you do the.
Speaker 1: Poppers before he busted open? Or like, uh?
Speaker 3: Since it was like throughout it was like it was
Speaker 3: like poppers, that poppers.
Speaker 1: That poppers. So you guys did pops the whole time.
Speaker 2: Squore popper, squirret poppers, your poppers, shout out to rush
Speaker 2: oh my.
Speaker 1: And then he was like, he was you can stay here.
Speaker 1: I'm not kicking you out. Whatever. I was like, I
Speaker 1: have a flight to catch in a couple hours. I
Speaker 1: gotta go. So I left and he had it.
Speaker 3: He was asking me what I did or whatever, and
Speaker 3: I told him I was a comic, but I wouldn't
Speaker 3: tell him my last name until after I left. So
Speaker 3: he watched a bunch of my videos and he was like,
Speaker 3: you're really funny, and that was really fun. So if
Speaker 3: you're ever in Amsterdam again, holler at me. He didn't
Speaker 3: say holler at me, but he gave me his phone
Speaker 3: number and I sent him mine. I was like, if
Speaker 3: you're ever in New.
Speaker 1: York, girl, he'll be here next week. He'll be so yeah.
Speaker 1: That was crazy.
Speaker 3: So then I get on a plane I end up
Speaker 3: in France. The sex in France twas not good. The
Speaker 3: dude was hot, but he just couldn't get hard. No,
Speaker 3: he like rolled his dick up and tried to like
Speaker 3: throw it in me sock.
Speaker 1: Out of here, and I was like, I have to go.
Speaker 1: He gave you flasted dick. Also, it was ninety seven
Speaker 1: degrees and there was no central air. Oh, which is rude.
Speaker 2: But he very europe and he was very European wedding
Speaker 2: on top of me. And I was like, nah, I
Speaker 2: can't yuck, and he's like he was like, oho, I'm
Speaker 2: gonna take a shower.
Speaker 1: Took a shower and you were dashed.
Speaker 3: No, it was in my it was in the house
Speaker 3: that I was saying, So I had to stay due.
Speaker 3: But he was but he was hot, you know. He
Speaker 3: was a rugby player, uh like six ' three sexy, right, Like.
Speaker 3: He came back to my house and he was on
Speaker 3: my balcony. He's smoking a cigarette because everybody in Europe
Speaker 3: smoked cigarettes. And there were these there were all these
Speaker 3: like tourists below us that were like watching him. And
Speaker 3: I got up and I was and I just stood
Speaker 3: to look at them. And he was like, oh, you're
Speaker 3: making them jealous, and I was like, good, they should
Speaker 3: be jealous.
Speaker 1: They're not pretty like me.
Speaker 3: So that's what Europe was was was back and forth,
Speaker 3: me feeling like the hottest person in the world, and
Speaker 3: then thinking am I ugly?
Speaker 1: Like that was what Europe was for me?
Speaker 5: Wait?
Speaker 3: Why it's like walking through the streets, like, look at
Speaker 3: how amazing I look compared to everybody on this dirty
Speaker 3: ass street?
Speaker 1: Yeah? And then am I getting trash dick? You're right? Okay?
Speaker 5: Luckily?
Speaker 1: Is that why the dick is so bad?
Speaker 2: Oh no, no, no, no, no, it's just they can't keep
Speaker 2: up and they're probably like intimidated a little bit.
Speaker 1: They couldn't be. They probably thought you were a mirage.
Speaker 2: They're like, how is this stunning, wonderful person in my
Speaker 2: house or next to me and about to let me
Speaker 2: put my dick in her?
Speaker 1: They were blown away.
Speaker 3: I mean the two people who came to me for
Speaker 3: sex sucked? Yeah right, how you Uber and some dick
Speaker 3: to me? And it's like one star one star?
Speaker 1: No? I only Uber won? Okay? So the the Italian
Speaker 1: dude in London just walked. He didn't Uber, he was poor,
Speaker 1: He just walked, yikes to the hotel. Well the girl,
Speaker 1: now you know, I know how the dick was the
Speaker 1: way it was if you walk into.
Speaker 2: You walk this way, stop a way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so that was giving a kid that was bad.
Speaker 3: I ubered to the Dutch dick and that you know,
Speaker 3: best six euros I have spent.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 1: And then the French dude had a scooter, so he
Speaker 1: scooted to me zop.
Speaker 3: Zoop, and then he tried to say that he loved
Speaker 3: me too, and tried to invite himself to New York
Speaker 3: and was like I could be there in August, and
Speaker 3: I was like, no, he could be where in August?
Speaker 1: I bet you he'll come, but You're like, where are
Speaker 1: you gonna stay?
Speaker 3: Because mind you, also, the French dude don't really speak
Speaker 3: no English, so like our whole conversation was like me
Speaker 3: listening to him and trying to catch everything he was
Speaker 3: saying and then throwing six French words back at him.
Speaker 1: So he's like, oh, she's such a good listener.
Speaker 3: Meanwhile, the whole time, I'm just trying to figure out
Speaker 3: he's gonna stop talking, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. And then
Speaker 3: I was like, all right, well, let me see if
Speaker 3: I get some black dick before I get out of here,
Speaker 3: because you know, I haven't done that for the break yet.
Speaker 1: And then it didn't happen.
Speaker 3: So last night I was like, oh, I'm gonna get
Speaker 3: some I'm gonna sleep with this black dude and it
Speaker 3: was not good. So honestly, that's what I get for
Speaker 3: trying to like write the rite through wrongs, trying to
Speaker 3: balance it out.
Speaker 1: Did you do to talk annoyed.
Speaker 2: About which part the guy last night and just.
Speaker 1: That bartender you slipped on that? I definitely did. You
Speaker 1: should a million percent.
Speaker 2: You totally should have let that nigga walk you somewhere
Speaker 2: wrong and then walk you to the wrong place and
Speaker 2: then walk fucking back and be like hey boo. But
Speaker 2: they want to know some of the looks because the
Speaker 2: thing about that is that the guy, that guy that
Speaker 2: I went on that date with and saw the bartender,
Speaker 2: he lived in that neighborhood. So I was afraid if
Speaker 2: I came back outside, I was going to bump into him.
Speaker 1: And I was like, it don't matter.
Speaker 2: You were free agent, bitch, you are free agient.
Speaker 3: And it's like you don't answer to nobody, you know,
Speaker 3: I don't answer to nobody. But Germans is crazy and
Speaker 3: we know this, And I was like, I don't want
Speaker 3: no problem.
Speaker 1: They can't be crazier than the dude you went to
Speaker 1: place last night.
Speaker 3: That dude, so sis, Honestly and truly, I cannot believe
Speaker 3: I did that.
Speaker 1: That is the craziest thing I've been.
Speaker 2: Can you offer e pre ho excursion You've got that
Speaker 2: same energy nigga?
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I can't do that here. This is I'm home.
Speaker 1: I can't be doing international host stuff. Are you looking
Speaker 1: at my nipple?
Speaker 2: Right now?
Speaker 1: You're looking at my nipple? Real hard? Is it out?
Speaker 1: I mean, is it a problem? I didn't go on
Speaker 1: the trip.
Speaker 2: I need something too, I need to give one yes,
Speaker 2: any questions Andrew?
Speaker 1: Do you have any questions about the trip? Or wait?
Speaker 2: Hold on, Nope, Andrew, you gotta get a mic because
Speaker 2: I got a message about you needing to be on
Speaker 2: the mic. Yeah, you have to be on a microphone.
Speaker 2: We can no longer speak from Afar. It's not right.
Speaker 1: Okay, we're doing it. Andrew is at a microphone.
Speaker 4: Hello, I see it. I'm moving now. Okay, oh my god.
Speaker 1: Wow, and finally on the pod.
Speaker 3: Right, Let's talk about what Andrew's wearing first, because people
Speaker 3: were like, when we give a full rundown of the
Speaker 3: look Andrew's giving us Hampton's a carnival shirt.
Speaker 2: No, he's given Banana Republic resort, Sarah.
Speaker 3: But it's very s Sarah, it's very slim's black and
Speaker 3: blue horizontal stripes and a tiny kaki short and he's.
Speaker 1: Got both shoes on.
Speaker 4: I need to get new ones.
Speaker 1: Okay, So the floor is open.
Speaker 3: If anybody has any questions about what I've just discussed,
Speaker 3: I will answer truthfully and honestly and to the best
Speaker 3: of my ability.
Speaker 2: So that means all lies ready to go. I'm actually
Speaker 2: so ecstatic. I mean, when I spoke to her, I
Speaker 2: was screaming because I was just so happy.
Speaker 1: But he was like, yeah, she was just so free
Speaker 1: out there screaming.
Speaker 2: I didn't very free, and it was beautiful, and so
Speaker 2: you know, I would have went back for that bartender, but.
Speaker 1: I gone that. I mean, obviously it was a mistake.
Speaker 2: Was tall, like who would he play in a movie?
Speaker 1: Who would play him in a movie? I don't know.
Speaker 1: He light skin, his hair was.
Speaker 2: Not low, not a froy Michael Ely, Michael like a
Speaker 2: young not tired Michael. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because he'd be
Speaker 2: looking real weird. Yeah, you know it works, like right,
Speaker 2: that's why he's tired, right right, right, right, right.
Speaker 1: He's But do you know who Michael Ely is? Absolutely no.
Speaker 2: You could tell by Andrew's hairline. You don't know who
Speaker 2: miche and we're going to take a minute to google
Speaker 2: Michael Eely. I'm letting y'all do it now.
Speaker 1: Hold on. I just wish I had kind of.
Speaker 3: That, kind of that, but more but more like manly
Speaker 3: and less pretty, less pretty, more like.
Speaker 1: He had a bigger he had a nicer body.
Speaker 2: Viewers, I mean listeners, I hope you're out there googling
Speaker 2: who Michael Ely is. Look at that less tired, younger,
Speaker 2: but also more manly.
Speaker 1: Okay, the only thing that him and Michael Eely have
Speaker 1: in common is the complexion sis.
Speaker 3: Honestly, he didn't really look like this, but like in
Speaker 3: the movie, sure does he have blue eyes?
Speaker 1: Michael Ely?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you like black dudes that have blue eyes.
Speaker 2: No, I mean, I've been seeing all the dick Andrews getting.
Speaker 2: I mean, why this is a very two sided conversation
Speaker 2: over here.
Speaker 1: Andrew, you've been getting a lot of dick too.
Speaker 2: Baby.
Speaker 4: Well, there's a village. Yeah, I'm just telling Sydney that
Speaker 4: it's this guy who has an airbnb. It's a mister
Speaker 4: B and B. So it's for gay people exclusively, mister
Speaker 4: B and B. So yeah, and so when gay people
Speaker 4: come to your area, the host will show them like
Speaker 4: this is the queer places to go to. This is
Speaker 4: like the neighborhood's not to go to.
Speaker 1: Oh it's like a little tour guide.
Speaker 4: It's cute, but you live in New York.
Speaker 1: What you need that for?
Speaker 4: I don't know, you want an airbnb? So this is
Speaker 4: him we shown I've shown you him before. Bomb Dick
Speaker 4: absolutely that he made me a pizza last week and
Speaker 4: then gave me a full body massage and then ate
Speaker 4: me out.
Speaker 1: Why oh that's what ate you out? And you mean
Speaker 1: tossed your salad.
Speaker 4: After after making it. After he made me food too.
Speaker 1: He coked in an Asia, as I know.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, He's like, oh.
Speaker 1: Now I'm ready for the entrel Yes, yea. The pizza
Speaker 1: was the app and your ass was the answer.
Speaker 4: Yeah, desserts and I was layered in that that coconut whatever,
Speaker 4: lubricant whatever, the body massage oil yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah yeah yeah, I got a little massage too.
Speaker 1: That's cute.
Speaker 4: It is. It was really cute.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Andrew, y'all got all types of yeast infections.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, the pillow got coconut oil in its stew.
Speaker 4: But anyway, he has mister B ANDB and he doesn't.
Speaker 4: He was like, I have this like lesbian couple that
Speaker 4: requested to stay with me, Sydney and Adrian yeaes Sydney
Speaker 4: and Adrian out of fact, and and so he was like,
Speaker 4: I'm really scared about it. I'm like, I don't see
Speaker 4: the connection here. And so he explains it, like I
Speaker 4: just think that women are disgusting. They're gonna expect me
Speaker 4: to buy them tampons and everything. I'm like, these are
Speaker 4: grown us women that are probably have gone through menopause.
Speaker 1: It was too Hillary Clintons. They just don't have a pantsuits.
Speaker 1: That's it, that's all they need.
Speaker 4: I am just absolutely dumbfounded. And then he's just they're disgusting.
Speaker 2: He's ignorant and disgusting. This guy, this is the salad guy.
Speaker 4: This is the salad guy. Yes, and so he said,
Speaker 4: I just don't want them to throw out the like
Speaker 4: bloody tampon in my trash can, because that's discussing. I'm like,
Speaker 4: you put your dick a raw penis into a fucking
Speaker 4: man's butthole?
Speaker 1: Are you talking about yourself?
Speaker 4: I'm talking about my.
Speaker 2: Only So you hadn't protected sex, okay, dog?
Speaker 1: Well, he was like, well, there's no way his dick
Speaker 1: is dirty because because my butt. Yeah, mister pizza hut himself.
Speaker 1: Twas salad. He did you a little olive garden.
Speaker 4: When you're here, you're that's so trill.
Speaker 2: Oh they got the best salad, though. I could just
Speaker 2: eat the breadsticks and the salad that you eat it.
Speaker 1: That's it, that's it. Not Andrews. You not Andrews type.
Speaker 1: You have got no house. Wow. So rude.
Speaker 4: But then then a few days ago there was someone else,
Speaker 4: a freaking body builder, so small digger, small one, but
Speaker 4: like huge. My god, he looks like your type.
Speaker 1: No, his is too thick. I thought I know him.
Speaker 4: He's a middle school English teacher.
Speaker 1: I thought you would say he's middle schooler. I was
Speaker 1: gonna say he is.
Speaker 4: He's a middle schooler.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, he's he's cute, he's.
Speaker 4: He's a little basic. But you know what, just look
Speaker 4: at the I mean, look.
Speaker 1: At that Abercromi and Fit shirt he got on.
Speaker 2: So he is basic. He probably has nobody brown in
Speaker 2: his life. Nah.
Speaker 1: I just feel like when his is he tall, he
Speaker 1: doesn't look like no.
Speaker 4: I was fully expecting him to be like five seven,
Speaker 4: but he was like five to eleven. He was tall.
Speaker 1: That's a good little gotcha a good little chip please. Yes,
Speaker 1: he's got a great body.
Speaker 4: He's corny, is terrible.
Speaker 1: Well it happens.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: It's very hard to just be perfect, it really is.
Speaker 3: I don't need you to be perfect. I don't need
Speaker 3: you to be perfect. I just need you to have
Speaker 3: some type of technique. I need you to know kind
Speaker 3: of what you're doing right, like if I'm if I'm
Speaker 3: coming in hot with uh address.
Speaker 4: That was very impressive.
Speaker 1: If I'm hitting you with that, I need you to
Speaker 1: hit me with some like but what's your technique Marie that?
Speaker 4: I was like, wow, what's my sake?
Speaker 3: So when I was at my house before this beautiful
Speaker 3: frenchman ruined my trip, I was like.
Speaker 1: Oh, you look you give good.
Speaker 3: Massages because he was like stroking my leg and I
Speaker 3: was like, you look at you give a good massage.
Speaker 1: And he was like, oh, I could show you. And
Speaker 1: I was like oh okay. And we're talking and talking
Speaker 1: and he's like, do you want this massage or not?
Speaker 1: Do you have body oil?
Speaker 3: Obviously the house that I was saying at head body oil,
Speaker 3: thank you so much.
Speaker 2: So we go into the bedroom and he's like, I should.
Speaker 1: I take off my shorts? I can't have a massage
Speaker 1: with these shorts ones.
Speaker 3: I took them off, but I also had on a
Speaker 3: body suit and he was like, you should probably take
Speaker 3: that off too.
Speaker 1: He's like, cause the strap's gonna be in the way,
Speaker 1: and I was like, yeah, yeah, you're right right. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm like, well, don't look at me. Why
Speaker 1: I take it off? Turn around?
Speaker 2: Oh you're trying to be coin now, bitch. You're like, yeah,
Speaker 2: come on through the nigga, And now you're like actually.
Speaker 2: But that situation was different because he had messaged. We
Speaker 2: had been talking for a couple of days, and he
Speaker 2: was like, what are you doing today? And I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: I just woke up.
Speaker 1: I'm hungry. And he was like, I could come to
Speaker 1: you and we can get some food in your neighborhood.
Speaker 1: I'm on my scooter. So he came over.
Speaker 3: We ate, he came to my house, we met a thing,
Speaker 3: We ate, came back butt naked, got a massage.
Speaker 1: And then we had sex. But the sex was terrible.
Speaker 1: But I was also like, but what is your technique?
Speaker 3: My technique is if it's not working for me, I
Speaker 3: just leave. My technic is also if you offer me
Speaker 3: poppers as you got a car and you're picking me up,
Speaker 3: then I'm coming over.
Speaker 1: My technique is that, like you know, hot pop.
Speaker 2: Okay, your pot is a vessel. Your body is a
Speaker 2: vessel to be used used properly.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 2: I'll say, last night, I had no makeup on and
Speaker 2: I just showed up like I had looked all day.
Speaker 1: So that was last night.
Speaker 4: But do you have a picture of him?
Speaker 1: That guy? I have a picture of him, Marie.
Speaker 2: See this is what I'm talking about. When you went
Speaker 2: on your little like excursions. I just wanted screenshots, that's
Speaker 2: all I Okay.
Speaker 3: I have screenshots of this particular pay Okay, Oh my god,
Speaker 3: I'm excited.
Speaker 1: I'm excited. Hold on wait wait, obsessed Okay, stressed out.
Speaker 1: Look look at junior architect. Oh you showed me that.
Speaker 2: Though we were we were talking, we were like, oh,
Speaker 2: he's not he's not bad looking. But I was like,
Speaker 2: I didn't like the pictures that he was taking. No,
Speaker 2: I don't these these pictures.
Speaker 4: Of a man.
Speaker 1: I don't don't. I hate that.
Speaker 2: That's why I'm starting in the mirror.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he's there's nothing that I would be like blown away.
Speaker 4: That would be like, oh he's basic. Yeah. Yeah, mirror
Speaker 4: picture pictures back.
Speaker 1: It's a lot of selfies. It was all in a
Speaker 1: mirror and I was like that's what That's why.
Speaker 4: I was like, eh, friends, Yeah.
Speaker 2: I was like, he ain't got no friends. Social skills anyway. Uh.
Speaker 1: He was definitely lying about being a junior architect.
Speaker 2: And then at one point he pulled up a blueprint,
Speaker 2: a random blueprint there was he did that. That's geeddy images.
Speaker 2: I was like, what is that? And he was like,
Speaker 2: this is my job and I was like, but what
Speaker 2: is it?
Speaker 1: What is it? I was like, but what is it?
Speaker 1: He was like it's a school and I was like,
Speaker 1: I was like he just got out of I was like,
Speaker 1: there's no way this man.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: And then he was like what are you doing tomorrow?
Speaker 3: And I was like I don't know. I'm gonna be
Speaker 3: busy though no I asked. I said to him what
Speaker 3: are you doing? And he was like seeing you And
Speaker 3: I was like, oh no, he said what do you haven?
Speaker 3: I was like, stuff, I'm gonna be busy. He was
Speaker 3: like like what you got? And I was like stuff
Speaker 3: and he was like so he was I'm gonna pull up.
Speaker 1: He's inside of you for like what five minutes. It
Speaker 1: was very brief.
Speaker 3: It was very brief because as it was happening, I
Speaker 3: was like, you know what, like this is not like
Speaker 3: I have to go home after this. When it was
Speaker 3: in Amsterdam, and when it was in London, and when
Speaker 3: it was in France, it was like, oh, whatever matter,
Speaker 3: but here I will potentially bump into that dude a
Speaker 3: trader jokes, yeah, potentially yeah, and that's what I don't like.
Speaker 1: And and he saw your Instagram.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, he can write on your ship.
Speaker 1: You could write on your wall. He could.
Speaker 3: But I can also block him. Block him now, I
Speaker 3: should block him.
Speaker 1: You should block him.
Speaker 2: I was confused, how did because or you should him
Speaker 2: listen to the pod first and then block it?
Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
Speaker 4: How did you get penetrated by him without kissing him?
Speaker 2: Ill Andrew, we do not say penetrate here, penetration. I
Speaker 2: can't say that because this is what happened. He was like,
Speaker 2: let me see your tongue, and I was like, I
Speaker 2: showed him. I was like like, I showed him my
Speaker 2: tongue and he was like, are you serious right now?
Speaker 3: And I was like what do you mean this is
Speaker 3: my tongue? And he was like, he's like pointing to
Speaker 3: his dick.
Speaker 1: He's trying to do sign language. Hey, Kenny, he's trying
Speaker 1: to get a blowjob with sign language. Ill bro disgusting,
Speaker 1: the world's greatest stuff.
Speaker 3: And I was like, I didn't come over here to
Speaker 3: suck your dick, flat out, That's what I said. I
Speaker 3: did not come over here to suck your dick. And
Speaker 3: he was like what And I was like, I did
Speaker 3: not come here.
Speaker 1: And I was holding his dick when I said this,
Speaker 1: so I squeezed it. I did not come here to
Speaker 1: suck your dick.
Speaker 3: And he was like, okay, so what you're trying to do?
Speaker 3: And I was like, how about I sit on your
Speaker 3: face instead?
Speaker 1: Girl? He was and he was so confused. He was
Speaker 1: like he was like, how is that the same thing?
Speaker 2: And I was like, it's literally the same exact thing,
Speaker 2: the same.
Speaker 3: Thing, and he was like oh. And then I was
Speaker 3: like do you have condoms? That's how he got inside me.
Speaker 4: I asked if he had condoms.
Speaker 1: I was like, what, I'm here, so we's see what happens.
Speaker 1: So what what? What size was it? Uh? He pulled
Speaker 1: out a magnum condom. Oh, they all pull out, pull
Speaker 1: out a little.
Speaker 2: Extra medium magnum condom. And this is me watching him
Speaker 2: put it on, just just staring right at for you
Speaker 2: that gift of the cat, like filing its nails.
Speaker 1: Exactly.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was filing my nailsis I was like, hmmm,
Speaker 3: is that what we're doing? That who you think you are?
Speaker 3: So you think you can dance anyway? So we start
Speaker 3: having sex. It was just the whole thing was was bad.
Speaker 1: And he didn't kiss you. Kiss Yeah, but he didn't
Speaker 1: kiss you. That's weird. He didn't even try to go
Speaker 1: in it is.
Speaker 4: It is weird.
Speaker 1: He probably was intimidating. He was like, He's like, she
Speaker 1: just yelled and she's not gonna suck my dick. Why
Speaker 1: would she kiss me? Yeah, but why are you asking me?
Speaker 1: It's like your dick. If you haven't even kissed me.
Speaker 4: What are we talking about?
Speaker 1: Listen, listeners, listeners, it's called four play kissing.
Speaker 2: Since when I tell you there was none because it
Speaker 2: was like, oh, well, what's on the table here, Well
Speaker 2: let's discuss what's happening here?
Speaker 1: Okay, wait, was there a playlist? Was there any music?
Speaker 1: Any candles?
Speaker 2: The movie was playing oh I don't even know, so
Speaker 2: he hit you with a tired netflix and chill background music.
Speaker 3: It wasn't even music. It was like an Italian film
Speaker 3: playing Oh my god. I almost forgot to tell you
Speaker 3: guys this. So when I was in Ampstam, yeah, I
Speaker 3: matched with this dude.
Speaker 1: I'm like, old dude.
Speaker 3: He was like forty four, right, and he's like the
Speaker 3: first thing he says to me is uh. He was like, hey,
Speaker 3: you ever pegg you ever? You ever fuck a man?
Speaker 3: And I was like no, but I want to. And
Speaker 3: he was like, oh well. He was like, tonight's your night.
Speaker 1: And I was like, man, I'm peg mad.
Speaker 2: He's forty four, This Australian man freaking messy. A disaster
Speaker 2: because he started sending me videos. He was like, you
Speaker 2: want me to send you some videos and stuff that
Speaker 2: I do and I was.
Speaker 4: Like, oh I do, yes, I do send me videos
Speaker 4: and how were they?
Speaker 1: They were nasty? I'm blowing away.
Speaker 3: So he's talking to me and he's like so he's
Speaker 3: like well. He was like I can send a car
Speaker 3: to come get you.
Speaker 1: I was like okay.
Speaker 3: He was like what before you come over, let's discuss
Speaker 3: what's on the table. He was like kissing. I was like, no, kid,
Speaker 3: I'm not kissing you, grouts. I'm just coming to peg
Speaker 3: you and then I'm leaving. That's all that I want
Speaker 3: to say.
Speaker 1: To do four play before you peg. No, such an
Speaker 1: asshole like he was like, you do drugs?
Speaker 2: You need some drugs. I got Cocaine'm on cocaine right now.
Speaker 2: I was like poppers.
Speaker 1: Guy was after, wait, will you do poppers in the States?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: Will I do States poppers? Domestic popper? I'm not. I'm not.
Speaker 3: I'm not going to purchase poppers, but if poppers are
Speaker 3: available in the home, then I'll do.
Speaker 2: Shout out to Joe, Kimbooster, Bowe and Yang everybody whoever
Speaker 2: got the poppers.
Speaker 1: Let's go pull up, pull up.
Speaker 3: Anyway, this this guy and I did not. I didn't
Speaker 3: I never met him. But I was fully prepared to
Speaker 3: peg this dude. And then he was like okay. So
Speaker 3: he was like, I want to be able to kiss
Speaker 3: you on the mouth, open, like with tongue, and I
Speaker 3: was like, you're not gonna get me. He was like,
Speaker 3: and then you're gonna peg me and then I'm gonna
Speaker 3: have sex with you.
Speaker 2: And I was like, no, no.
Speaker 1: You know you just lost one.
Speaker 3: You lost one, right, so that is you just lost one.
Speaker 3: I was fully prepared to peg this man.
Speaker 2: Though you might win some, but you just lost one.
Speaker 2: Because I was like, it's gonna be bad.
Speaker 3: But I was like, at least I'm in Amsterdam and
Speaker 3: I'm getting in work for when I when the picking matters.
Speaker 2: Friends, these the confidence, the stories, this has been, Yeah,
Speaker 2: out of control.
Speaker 1: I know I should have done better.
Speaker 2: No, I did great. I think you did great. I
Speaker 2: think you know your next go round you're gonna level up.
Speaker 2: You know you're gonna put some more stank on it.
Speaker 2: But I'm proud of everything that you've accomplished.
Speaker 1: In three weeks. The four people, I mean I knew
Speaker 1: you for Like the.
Speaker 4: TV spirt was really honorable, really honorable.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I watched it just kind of like sligh,
Speaker 1: Are you serious? Are you you're lying? Your guess? It
Speaker 1: was on the windows, No, it was everywhere.
Speaker 3: He sent me a text a message after I left
Speaker 3: and was like, next time, you got to give up
Speaker 3: your mattress because it was like.
Speaker 1: A big Did you see the size of this table?
Speaker 1: That's how big the West spot was. Oh my god, Marie,
Speaker 1: I don't believe you re peede on that.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 3: I guess I peed on you, okay, because after I
Speaker 3: was done, I was like, well, I have to go
Speaker 3: pee and he was like still yeah. I was like,
Speaker 3: that's not what I'm squirting is. It's not white pee.
Speaker 1: You definitely peede.
Speaker 2: Sure, maybe I did this, but I had to pee
Speaker 2: when I was done, So it's a lot of pee.
Speaker 1: You drank water, and you did poppers. Poppers make you pee,
Speaker 1: Andrew are poppers expert. I'm not a poppers expert, but
Speaker 1: oh you haven't done poppers.
Speaker 4: I've done poppers like a few times. I'm not. I'm
Speaker 4: not on the bandwagon, though.
Speaker 3: I'm let me introduce you to a spin. What the.
Speaker 1: I mean?
Speaker 2: Wow, this is the time of my life where I'm like, fuck, man,
Speaker 2: this is this is a bad time to be sober.
Speaker 1: You want to do some poppers right now?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 1: I can't. I'm coming up on two years.
Speaker 2: If I was thirty days in, I would do some
Speaker 2: poppers if I'd be like a very last it's just
Speaker 2: been thirty days.
Speaker 3: Well, I was like, well, what is poppers? It's like
Speaker 3: keyboard cleaner or something.
Speaker 4: Yeah. If they saw that, like yeah, like the hardware.
Speaker 1: Yeah, technically I could do poppers. This is not a
Speaker 1: drug drug. It's like huffing paint. Get you to me
Speaker 1: more on SIS.
Speaker 2: Listeners, If I'm a sober person, can I do poppers?
Speaker 3: Answer is no, friend? Are you you got to be
Speaker 3: sober all the way through? No poppers for you?
Speaker 1: What do you You want to do poppers and bang somebody?
Speaker 1: I don't know. You know, you know I'm in.
Speaker 3: An open relationship, so free agent, open relationship.
Speaker 1: Can you tell the listeners what you're talking about? Sis?
Speaker 2: I mean, I've dropped this bomb like ten minutes before
Speaker 2: the pie is over. But yeah, I'm in an open relationship.
Speaker 2: Just in case you see Adrian out there, don't text me,
Speaker 2: don't don't be sending me no pictures, know nothing I
Speaker 2: don't want, don't don't do it fully.
Speaker 1: And you know that was gonna happen. People are gonna
Speaker 1: be like, oh, that looks like yeah, it was like
Speaker 1: City's girlfriend. I'm famous. Yeah, I'm famous. I got a
Speaker 1: blue check.
Speaker 2: New York is small. Somebody's gonna text me something and
Speaker 2: I was gonna be.
Speaker 1: Ready to fight. So yeah, she's uh, she's out here.
Speaker 1: She's gonna have a hot girl, summer. I'm allowing it.
Speaker 1: I'm allowing it. Let Adrian be free and fun. Are
Speaker 1: you gonna have a hot girl summer? What's happened in
Speaker 1: said you're trying to do these poppers or not? No,
Speaker 1: I'm all set.
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna be real boring like I have been,
Speaker 2: you know, being consistent.
Speaker 1: Wow. Well, friend, listen, I am on. I bought.
Speaker 3: I didn't bring any gifts for anybody back from Europe,
Speaker 3: but I did bring Slutty Reezie back.
Speaker 1: So Slutty Reezy is here. Yeah. The host centennial has
Speaker 1: started with six months left for the end of the year. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but we out here. Okay, that's worth it. Hot girl summer,
Speaker 1: act up, smacked up summer.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you're usually so private about all your sex stuff. Yeah,
Speaker 4: a lot.
Speaker 1: All of it is on here and I'm going to uh.
Speaker 4: To this episode.
Speaker 1: We're deaf not editing any of this. Take it all out.
Speaker 1: We cannot. Every time I said that word dick sensor
Speaker 1: say put like a I saw his women. Ye.
Speaker 2: That's our brand to not take anything out of the pod, Sydney.
Speaker 1: Please, we we barely do any edits hard. I literally
Speaker 1: never asked for an edit, but I feel like Sydney.
Speaker 4: You asked for one. What did I ask you to
Speaker 4: go about someone at work?
Speaker 3: I said something mean about somebody you did and my
Speaker 3: old Jai and now thinking about it.
Speaker 1: Left it's so stupid. It's wait.
Speaker 2: I have a couple of shoutouts, because that's what we're
Speaker 2: gonna do. I had Kathleen firm Organ send me some
Speaker 2: bisk off to Oh GRASSI ass for you. Kathleen, You're amazing.
Speaker 2: She wrote a little note to the bisco Off Queen Sydney.
Speaker 2: Don't let Marie shame you. Bisc Off is fucking delish.
Speaker 2: Thank you and Marie for making me laugh so much,
Speaker 2: especially on the hard days. X ex Kathleen from Oregon.
Speaker 2: Oh you're so lean. Shout out to you, Kathleen, You're
Speaker 2: so so sweet. We also have messages in our as
Speaker 2: well on the unofficial expert page. Thank you guys for actually,
Speaker 2: you know, listening to us and taking directions quite well. Honestly,
Speaker 2: you know, you guys are the real I was really surprised.
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, look at them sending us a stories. Wait,
Speaker 2: somebody had an uber story that was really funny. Let
Speaker 2: me try to find that. Uh it was cut up.
Speaker 2: I didn't have a queue up bout up up. I
Speaker 2: wasn't I wasn't even thinking because I was just like, oh,
Speaker 2: I'm not going to do this, And then I'm like,
Speaker 2: actually I should because I did ask them. Oh, somebody
Speaker 2: wrote from London. I think her name is Sasha. Sasha. Hey, girls,
Speaker 2: I hope you're doing both. No, I hope you're both
Speaker 2: shining and doing well. Just letting you know that I'm
Speaker 2: listening from my kitchen in sunny London. Was okay, Since
Speaker 2: if you're in Sunny London, go down to Short Ditch
Speaker 2: and the hotel that I, uh, the bartender works at
Speaker 2: is called Actually.
Speaker 1: I don't remember the name of the hotel. Fuck fuck
Speaker 1: can you find out? Yeah, I'm gonna find out right.
Speaker 2: No, okay, let me continue. Work's been a madness. Work
Speaker 2: has been madness today. So you two are bringing me
Speaker 2: joy whilst I cook dinner. You're both so witty and
Speaker 2: razor sharp. Keep it up, ladies, you're winning. Alexandra X
Speaker 2: so sorry Alexandra from London. Thank you, baby, baby, You're fantastic.
Speaker 2: Oh and then we had Tiara Sinda's a bad Uber experience.
Speaker 2: I guess it's from the last episode that we just
Speaker 2: put up. Last summer, my mother and I I went
Speaker 2: to go to the met in NYC. We caught an
Speaker 2: Uber back to Penn Station and this guy was the
Speaker 2: worst driver I've ever had. When we got to the station,
Speaker 2: we tried to get out, and he yelled at us
Speaker 2: to stay in the car because he wanted to drop
Speaker 2: us around the corner. He then tries to take off
Speaker 2: and the taxi lane in front of the station and
Speaker 2: almost hits another taxi. The taximan starts yelling, and our
Speaker 2: Uber keeps moving forward and crashes into the taxi.
Speaker 4: This is battle of Uber versus taxi.
Speaker 1: That's what's really happening.
Speaker 2: Then the taximan gets out of the car, comes over
Speaker 2: and opens the backseat door and starts screaming at us,
Speaker 2: what ladies. My mother and I were shook and I
Speaker 2: had to jump out and run away because if a
Speaker 2: full brawl I was about to happen. The police ran over,
Speaker 2: and eventually the police ran over. Eventually, but my mom
Speaker 2: and I was out of there. I wonder if they
Speaker 2: paid it's an Uber. They of course they paid, yeah,
Speaker 2: but I would have just wrote like, oh my god,
Speaker 2: here's my experience.
Speaker 1: And Uber was gonna give them five dollars. You know
Speaker 1: that's what Uber does. No, no, no, no, people, wait,
Speaker 1: hold on.
Speaker 2: I got into Uber like three weeks three days ago,
Speaker 2: and my Uber got in an accident.
Speaker 1: I took pictures in everything. Boo. I got out in
Speaker 1: the front. I was taking photos. Send it to Uber.
Speaker 1: They sent me all my money back.
Speaker 3: It sounds like they ran out and jumped on the
Speaker 3: Long Island railroad. So I don't think they took pictures
Speaker 3: of the uber crash.
Speaker 1: There's other stuff, but I can't find it right now.
Speaker 2: You know, there's you know. I love that you guys
Speaker 2: are sending us stuff. We feel way more official.
Speaker 1: Just keep sending this. If you guys have more than
Speaker 1: bisc off, send that as well.
Speaker 2: You got bathing suits, bathing suits, y'all got bathing suits,
Speaker 2: You got dick Listen, well, I wear a size two
Speaker 2: and bathing suits, and I wear a size twelve and dicks,
Speaker 2: and I'll take whatever she's having.
Speaker 4: Some of the listeners are real, real cute, and the
Speaker 4: DM s too.
Speaker 1: DM, this is what they're talking about. He producer Andrew
Speaker 1: love You on the podcast in the background.
Speaker 4: In the background, well, I made it bit.
Speaker 1: Okay, I know this is a big deal.
Speaker 2: Marie talking about her excursions, and then andrew a microphone like, we're.
Speaker 3: Really just elevating as a group. It feels like a
Speaker 3: Patreon episode.
Speaker 1: Honestly, surely this is so free and it's stupid. It
Speaker 1: should have been on Patreon. It's just so free, you
Speaker 1: know what Marie said.
Speaker 2: Marie was like, oh, no, no, no, I have to
Speaker 2: I have to tell all of this on on the
Speaker 2: pot and I was like, you know what's funny, We
Speaker 2: got some more stories to put on the Patreon. Anal
Speaker 2: in the Ace, we got that Anal in the Anal
Speaker 2: in the Ace. Yeah, Marie, you got another story that
Speaker 2: you didn't put on here.
Speaker 1: Oh, we're gonna put me on Blessed. So you guys,
Speaker 1: flight on over to the Patreon if you want to
Speaker 1: hear Anal in the A. You see I do Si,
Speaker 1: you see I plum the baby Patreon. It's something wrong
Speaker 1: with you, dude, it is.
Speaker 4: Yes.
Speaker 3: Sidney was like, save all your stories for the Patreon
Speaker 3: and I was like, Sis, it's too many people listening
Speaker 3: that know that I'm gone and want to know what's happening.
Speaker 1: Yeah, did you pray? Her is a movement? Sis, it's
Speaker 1: a mood did you uh, did you miss us? The podcast?
Speaker 1: No us, like all your friends, your family.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know some of the days, some of the
Speaker 3: nights when I was out and I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: I gotta be out here by myself.
Speaker 2: I got to be social out here in New Street.
Speaker 2: I was I'm not I'm not built to travel by myself.
Speaker 1: You're not. I'm not built to be like traveling by myself.
Speaker 3: If I'm meeting people who live in different cities, yes,
Speaker 3: but actually being on a road alone, I was like,
Speaker 3: this sucks.
Speaker 4: You have companions, though, you had some companions out there,
Speaker 4: have three.
Speaker 1: Companions and one of them was trash.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean one of them was nice, but he's trashed too.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I just every time I saw you pose something,
Speaker 2: I was like, damn, Marie needs me, because I was like,
Speaker 2: I was like, I know she has looks who can
Speaker 2: take pictures of her?
Speaker 1: Honestly, And that was like the most upsetting part about
Speaker 1: the trip is like, who's gonna take all these feos?
Speaker 4: You had some really cute photos, Yeah that I took.
Speaker 1: Yeah that I took, like the dude from last night
Speaker 1: in a mirror, which is fine. You're an influencer and
Speaker 1: that's like our brand to have a mirror pick.
Speaker 4: It was.
Speaker 1: It was crazy.
Speaker 2: But I I left my my Airbnb like twenty days earlier,
Speaker 2: twenty one days early, and the chick was not trying
Speaker 2: to give me my money back what so I had
Speaker 2: it was this whole thing where my grandma, there's drama
Speaker 2: and my yeah, and my grandfather had died the day
Speaker 2: before I left Frome, I know, and so Airbnb was like, well,
Speaker 2: if there's an extenuating sick circumstance, then you'll get you
Speaker 2: We'll get.
Speaker 1: You your money back. Somebody died and I was like,
Speaker 1: somebody did, Actually, somebody did.
Speaker 4: Actually.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So the trip was not at all planned because I thought, oh,
Speaker 3: three weeks one place. I made no plans, no arrangements
Speaker 3: to go nowhere else.
Speaker 1: Marie Adrian just called, hey Adrian, you're on the pod.
Speaker 1: Oh I thought you were ringing the doorbell. Wow?
Speaker 2: Do you do you hear that open relationship energy? She's like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, just saw you are at the door, goodbye. Wow.
Speaker 1: Did you see how my own girlfriend curved me on
Speaker 1: my fucking podcast? Sidney, what you're gonna do?
Speaker 3: You need to have a hot girl summer too. She's
Speaker 3: in an open relationship, you win an open relationship.
Speaker 1: Now we don't get you some hopes. No, I don't
Speaker 1: want to get you some hopes, some young mos. No,
Speaker 1: I don't want anybody. I'm all sad. I don't have
Speaker 1: the mental capacity. Janew Monne walks in right now lives
Speaker 1: how skirt up? What you're doing? Sis? I don't like
Speaker 1: these hypothetical scenarios. Is coming in to do uh seek treatment?
Speaker 1: Dang so No?
Speaker 3: No, she pulls up, you bump into her at the
Speaker 3: Age Hotel. Sis, what's happening?
Speaker 1: I really love that tight Rope song that you had
Speaker 1: back years ago. I really love that song.
Speaker 2: Nothing from the new album, nothing about Figures, No, that
Speaker 2: song that you released nineteen years ago.
Speaker 1: I really loved your eyebrows in Moonlight. Wow. I have
Speaker 1: no game. I know that I have no game.
Speaker 2: People people message me in my dms, and they're very
Speaker 2: respectful and friendly and just. There will be a couple
Speaker 2: of people who will say, like, damn, no disrespect, but
Speaker 2: damn you fine, no disrespect, but damn them titties. No,
Speaker 2: they don't say that, they don't even say that. They're
Speaker 2: very like they I'm everybody's aunt. It's crazy because I'm
Speaker 2: younger than everyone.
Speaker 1: Hilarious. People don't say anything disrespectful to me and my
Speaker 1: dms either, So there's that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well Marie, you're fucking ruthless, especially now you know
Speaker 2: I'm a hoe now, so I really have no filter,
Speaker 2: no qualms about shutting down a man in a wheelchair.
Speaker 1: I'm not sitting on you or that ship.
Speaker 4: Oh, merch.
Speaker 1: Sitting on that chair. He was like, everything works.
Speaker 4: Wait, how did you not see that he was in
Speaker 4: a chair which.
Speaker 1: I hadn't deleted?
Speaker 2: Well, he he unmatched me, but how did I not
Speaker 2: see he's not One of the pictures was like him
Speaker 2: laying in like.
Speaker 1: A hammock with like how did he get axes? He
Speaker 1: rolled a havock and threw his body at it.
Speaker 4: He was like, the most problematic thing.
Speaker 1: I think we're all was what his problematic? I feel
Speaker 1: like we'll have more to talk about as well going forward.
Speaker 1: We're going to try to get some a less guess
Speaker 1: coming up. It's in the works, merch a list guests
Speaker 1: coming in the works.
Speaker 2: And the Wordy messaged me on Instagram and was like,
Speaker 2: every time you guys say merch, is somebody writing down
Speaker 2: the stuff for merch?
Speaker 4: And I was like I was, but then I realized
Speaker 4: that it was like you were saying merch after every
Speaker 4: single thing that I was like, I can't keep up.
Speaker 1: You can't keep up that right there is merch.
Speaker 4: Yeah, merch.
Speaker 1: But someone wrote me they were like, yeah, I think
Speaker 1: you guys saying merch is is the bit is merch. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's merch.
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, if you can make a shirt, this is.
Speaker 2: And then one person wrote me was like, if you
Speaker 2: guys don't fucking make something that it's.
Speaker 1: Merch worthy already. I'm so tired of you saying merch.
Speaker 1: Just fucking do it already.
Speaker 2: What would be the one thing that you was like, Yeah,
Speaker 2: put some fire underneath my ass, bitch, Yeah, talk to
Speaker 2: me crazy, I love it.
Speaker 1: Come on summer fucking moist. Yeah, stick a biscoff in
Speaker 1: my ass. Yeah, golf in my ass. Crazy than anything said,
Speaker 1: the actually is pizza and salads. That's merch. Biscoff in
Speaker 1: my ass. I'm not wearing that shirt. That's not coming
Speaker 1: to my size.
Speaker 4: Merch.
Speaker 1: What did you say, Andrew? What was your question?
Speaker 4: No, no, what what would be the one thing that
Speaker 4: you put on the.
Speaker 1: Merch cotton gaunt and then the word merch.
Speaker 4: I like merch. Merch is so funny merch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean that's what we do. An Ariel font just.
Speaker 4: Big o live action. What do we think?
Speaker 2: So I don't care about these live actions. I was like, you,
Speaker 2: we are so bored. We literally cannot rep We can't
Speaker 2: do new content. We have to go back in the
Speaker 2: vault and make things.
Speaker 1: But there's some new stuff there. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: don't know how I feel about a black Mermaid.
Speaker 4: I feel like they gave her red locks and it's like,
Speaker 4: was that a real photo? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, like a like a vintage not mermaid outfit. Just
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 3: I don't I feel like it's gonna look bad. I
Speaker 3: have a lot of thoughts about it. But somebody was like, yeah,
Speaker 3: but Brandy gave us Cinderella and it was like the
Speaker 3: best Cinderella ever. And I was like, oh, I forgot
Speaker 3: uh we had a black Cinderella and whoop he was
Speaker 3: in it and the prince was Asian. They gave us everything.
Speaker 3: They gave us multicultural Cinderella. So maybe they'll do it up,
Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying. Maybe they'll do it well. But
Speaker 3: McCarthy is Ursula and that I think is problematic. Why
Speaker 3: because because Ursula, in my mind, is either a big
Speaker 3: black woman or a big black drag queen.
Speaker 1: Like, Ursula is not a.
Speaker 2: Funny, goofy white lady, right, lusisamccarthy is not gonna play.
Speaker 1: She's not gonna give us drama. She's gonna give us
Speaker 1: kind of like silly. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Also, she can't sing, and she can't sing yeah, mess yeah.
Speaker 1: But I'm not here for black Ursula taking a white
Speaker 1: woman's voice. I'm not here for that. I mean I
Speaker 1: feel like a drag queen could have done it and
Speaker 1: would have done it. Yeah they should, queen. I would
Speaker 1: have been here for a drag queen. It would have
Speaker 1: been the drac queen would have nailed it.
Speaker 4: Disney would never do that.
Speaker 1: Disney would never the one like the one.
Speaker 4: Character in live action Beating the Beast was supposed to
Speaker 4: be gay and then people were like, we're not even
Speaker 4: showing it at the theater. We can't even show it
Speaker 4: to the children. They can't. Yes, yeah, that little one.
Speaker 4: I think it was like Josh Goad, was he gay
Speaker 4: in the movie. I don't watch it and I's just
Speaker 4: read all the headline are.
Speaker 1: They're so complicated it's a fucking animation. Yeah, but people
Speaker 1: like what they like.
Speaker 2: Like when the Hunger Games books movie came out, people
Speaker 2: were like, Roue's.
Speaker 1: Black in the book.
Speaker 3: It doesn't say and it was like she's not even
Speaker 3: a main characteristic like let this little black girl get
Speaker 3: her little chick.
Speaker 1: And they were like, no, people get super upset about
Speaker 1: this movie stuff.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I saw the New Spider Man and Zenda. Zenda is
Speaker 3: Mary Jane good character this.
Speaker 1: Girl playing.
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't she's taller than Spider Man. I
Speaker 3: don't make noice. I was like they could have picked them.
Speaker 3: Kirsten dunst Back.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, what her fu up teeth? Oh my god?
Speaker 4: Hey hey she.
Speaker 1: Has character merch merch. Well did we learn anything today?
Speaker 1: So much?
Speaker 2: I'm just like, I'm exhausted from everything that you told us, Marie.
Speaker 2: I'm so glad that you've You're like you're turning a
Speaker 2: new leaf. You're telling us your business. You're fucking left
Speaker 2: and right, no condom.
Speaker 1: Condoms ever time you're talking about your county, wash a math,
Speaker 1: I went soapia bitch, Andrew.
Speaker 3: You could keep telling us your business and you know
Speaker 3: there's always a chair for you at the podcast if
Speaker 3: there's nobody sitting in it.
Speaker 4: Of course, this is the first time I've ever sat
Speaker 4: in the shirt. It feels so weird.
Speaker 1: Well you know now, but it's still moist from.
Speaker 4: Last week.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, the good thing is is that people were
Speaker 2: already sliding in your dms before. But now it's like,
Speaker 2: y'all should just flood that ship or put shady palm
Speaker 2: trees all over his fucking Instagram? Can we Jack Knight Andrew?
Speaker 1: Please? Can we do that shady palm trees all over
Speaker 1: his ship?
Speaker 3: And for those of you who have not yet done this,
Speaker 3: and I'm sure it's many of you, go ahead and
Speaker 3: go to Jack Knight's.
Speaker 1: Space, we can. He just bought a tesla. He just
Speaker 1: he has money. He just bought a tesla. He bought
Speaker 1: a tesla. Yeah, he just he rented a tesla, or
Speaker 1: he bought it all. He bought it.
Speaker 3: Well, that's what happens when you make that grownish money,
Speaker 3: that blackish he's making ABC money.
Speaker 1: It's fucking stupid, man.
Speaker 2: I know I can't wait to ride in that tesla. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 2: I can't wait for us to get that kind of money.
Speaker 1: If I had that type of money, then I would.
Speaker 1: We still wouldn't buy that car. I wouldn't buy that
Speaker 1: car and buy that car, but I would be even
Speaker 1: meaner to men and meaner to me. So I would
Speaker 1: that be meaner to you, Sis, be meaner to men?
Speaker 3: I would literally, you'd be nicer to me in the app,
Speaker 3: I'll be the same level of mean to you, consistent
Speaker 3: level mean slash nights.
Speaker 1: Would you take me to dinner? Sis?
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 1: Were we not talking about.
Speaker 3: Us both having money and you're asking me to You know, Sidney,
Speaker 3: you have a job now and I'm unemployed, and you
Speaker 3: have not taken me to dinner with your corporate.
Speaker 1: Card, So honestly, I don't have one, honestly.
Speaker 2: And let's not forget when I was you, when I
Speaker 2: was a waitress, I was like Marie was my girlfriend.
Speaker 2: Whatever you want you want to ubers, I got you.
Speaker 2: Let's get food. You want drinks?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, remember on Valentine's Day when you saved me,
Speaker 3: you sent me that uber. I was on a date
Speaker 3: with this dude and he was.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, got uber all the way from the
Speaker 2: Upper East Side and brought you to my job.
Speaker 1: I am fucking great. A We're I'm so glad we're
Speaker 1: together here. Give me your hand. I missed you. I
Speaker 1: got chips, I got bisk call this bitch. I got
Speaker 1: bisclough in my hair hands. I love you all right, bye, guys.
Speaker 2: Make sure you raise, subscribe, review all that shit, and
Speaker 2: don't be ho shaming. Okay, eat, pray how and if
Speaker 2: you get there and you feel like you're not gonna come, tell.
Speaker 1: Him, I didn't come here to suck your dick. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's merch merch.
Speaker 2: I didn't come here to suck your dick merch. Can
Speaker 2: that be our second shirt? That's our second shirt.
Speaker 1: The first one is merch merch. The second one is
Speaker 1: I didn't come here to suck your dick. Can we
Speaker 1: get stickers? My stickiers?
Speaker 4: I love it?
Speaker 1: License plates? All right? Bye, guys, Thank you, Love your
Speaker 1: terrible faces, by friend.
Speaker 4: Forever.
Speaker 5: This has been a Forever Dog production executive produced by
Speaker 5: Brett Boham, Joe ccilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts,
Speaker 5: please visit Foreverdog Podcasts dot com and subscribe to our
Speaker 5: shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker 5: Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following
Speaker 5: us on Twitter and Instagram at Forever Dog Team and
Speaker 5: liking our page on Facebook