WEBVTT - Dear Banya: Not Cool Enough for These Eyepatches

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<v Speaker 1>Scrubbing In with Becka Tilly and Tanya rad and iHeartRadio

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<v Speaker 1>and two times People's Choice Award winning podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello Everybody, we are scrubbing in. Dear Banya, Dear Bonya.

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<v Speaker 3>Happy Thursday, Thursday Thursday. Who's throwing them back tonight?

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<v Speaker 4>Someone on the poor on the Facebook group was like,

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<v Speaker 4>why do they pretend like it's Thursday?

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<v Speaker 2>We know that they're in the same clothes and bring Yeah, Like, no,

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<v Speaker 2>that's a whole bit. Is we know that you know.

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<v Speaker 1>We like to dress the same on Mondays and Thursdays.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it's called recycled, reduce, reuse and the.

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<v Speaker 2>Same and everything.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, we had some we're gonna do Dear Bonnia questions

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<v Speaker 4>and then we wanted to do the game again that

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<v Speaker 4>so Haley was watching the clip of us doing the

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<v Speaker 4>game last week, the Guess Who game, and she was like, God,

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<v Speaker 4>Donia's questions are so bad.

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<v Speaker 5>I asked the exact same questions that you did.

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<v Speaker 2>You didn't but yeah, some you had some that were separate.

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<v Speaker 4>But when I played with her, she kept repeating the

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<v Speaker 4>exact same question as me, and I'm like, this is

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<v Speaker 4>not fun.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, it's hard when you hog all the good questions,

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<v Speaker 3>and you go first. I'm gonna go first this time, okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Mark, mark it down, Fine, goes first.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, and you try not to capy me.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm pretty sure you went first last time.

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<v Speaker 5>No, I'm pretty sure.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I think you did. I feel pretty confident.

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<v Speaker 5>I feel pretty confident it was you.

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<v Speaker 4>Anyways, So we're gonna try that again today. But first

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<v Speaker 4>I need everyone to stop what you're doing. And if

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<v Speaker 4>you haven't already, go buy a ticket to see Girls

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<v Speaker 4>Like Girls this weekend.

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<v Speaker 2>This is when it counts.

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<v Speaker 5>I'm going to see it again tomorrow.

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<v Speaker 4>That's right, it's tomorrow. It's Saturday, it's Sunday. I even

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<v Speaker 4>think Thursday night they have some showing. So I'm not

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<v Speaker 4>going buy a ticket, but you should go. It's amazing.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm gonna see it like ten times this weekend.

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<v Speaker 5>I have a jam packed weekend.

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<v Speaker 6>Really, yes, tell me more, because we have.

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<v Speaker 5>Hayley's movie on Friday.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, so that's my Friday, right, Saturday, Saturday, everyone Disneyland.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh that is jam packed.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, Robbie and like his brother cousins and all the kids.

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<v Speaker 5>Okay, so it's like a big crew.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay.

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<v Speaker 3>And then Sunday, We're hosting our Father's Day barbecue.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, Oh I bet Robbie is about to

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<v Speaker 2>pop off.

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<v Speaker 5>He is popping off. He's already like started the prep.

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<v Speaker 5>It's cute. It's like really cute. He like loves this.

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<v Speaker 2>Sweet because he is a father, you know.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I know that's what I said too. I was like,

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<v Speaker 3>are you sure you want to do this? Like, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>like it's a lot of work for you. It's Father's Day.

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<v Speaker 3>Don't you want to kick back with a beer? And

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<v Speaker 3>he was like, no, I love doing this, like I

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<v Speaker 3>love making food. I love having people over.

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<v Speaker 2>Probably ever kicked back with the beer in his life,

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<v Speaker 2>I haven't seen that.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, he's not really a kickback, but he does like

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<v Speaker 3>to throw back a beer.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, yeah, yeah, that's really fun. And see that he's

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<v Speaker 2>doing that. Yeah, and you're gonna just be ready with

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<v Speaker 2>your gloves for the dishes.

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<v Speaker 5>Gots you bet you?

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<v Speaker 2>Why don't you?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm making little gift bags or like little like a

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<v Speaker 3>little thing for all the dads and there.

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<v Speaker 5>So it's just a mug right now, it's his dad

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<v Speaker 5>on it.

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<v Speaker 3>There's like these cute little mugs and so it's gonna

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<v Speaker 3>put like little things in there, like dads would like.

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<v Speaker 3>And all I have right now is birds, bees chapstick,

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<v Speaker 3>and I ordered some of those simply mints.

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<v Speaker 5>Like do guys even care if their breat smells? I

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<v Speaker 5>feel like no.

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<v Speaker 1>I like mince. I like lip bom.

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<v Speaker 2>Why so men not hear of their breast smell? That's crazy?

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<v Speaker 5>I just like men don't care period.

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<v Speaker 1>I like mince. I use mince to stop eating.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, like I use that tight suppress it.

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<v Speaker 1>Something like when I when I have the sugar, like

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<v Speaker 1>that you know the sweetness or whatever, there's sugar, but

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<v Speaker 1>when you have the mint, but the time it's over,

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<v Speaker 1>you've moved on to other things, you know, like it

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<v Speaker 1>signals to me that this meal has over. Yeah, so

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<v Speaker 1>I don't just keep eating or dessert or whatever mint.

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<v Speaker 2>So instead of dessert, everyone should just be serving men.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, if there's a dessert, I'm going to eat it,

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<v Speaker 1>but if I eat the mint, I'll stop be able

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<v Speaker 1>to stop myself.

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<v Speaker 3>So I was also thinking about doing like some little

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<v Speaker 3>hand sanitizers in there, and then I was like, what

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<v Speaker 3>do guys want? Then I was like, maybe like like

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<v Speaker 3>oil to like change their oil and their cow. I

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<v Speaker 3>don't know, like a measuring.

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<v Speaker 6>The mug.

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<v Speaker 5>That's the thing I need to be.

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<v Speaker 2>Like some teas, like golf teas.

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<v Speaker 3>That is not a direction I was going in. I'm

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<v Speaker 3>not sure if any of them a cup of golf.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh, I don't know the men in your family, so

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<v Speaker 4>I can't confirm tonight.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, it's tough. So I'm just like working on that

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<v Speaker 5>right now.

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<v Speaker 2>What about some mini little colognes or something.

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<v Speaker 3>Scents are so tough, you know, like they're so personal

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<v Speaker 3>you have to get I'm getting six dads.

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<v Speaker 4>Are going to be coming over, or like a mini

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<v Speaker 4>travel like body wash or something like keels.

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<v Speaker 5>Do you guys care about smelling good?

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<v Speaker 2>I mean it's nice they should.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, maybe some eye drop, why.

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<v Speaker 2>Help us out, it's in a mug.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want any of that other stuff. No.

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<v Speaker 2>I love a fireballs.

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<v Speaker 1>I like the lip ball. I like the other thing, mince.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't like anything else.

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<v Speaker 5>You said, no hand sanitizer.

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<v Speaker 1>No, I mean, okay, sure, fine.

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<v Speaker 5>Okay, I know, so what else? Maybe some eye patches.

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<v Speaker 2>No road.

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<v Speaker 1>Pimple patches, none of those things. I don't know what

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<v Speaker 1>I want, but I don't want those things.

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<v Speaker 4>So this makes me feel validated because I found men

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<v Speaker 4>to be so hard to shop for, so hard, but

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<v Speaker 4>y'all don't even know what you want.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so it validates.

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<v Speaker 3>What's even harder is doing a generic one for six

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<v Speaker 3>different dads my dad.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, if it's in a mug like my dad's pretty easy,

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<v Speaker 3>Like I could get. I got my dad these b

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<v Speaker 3>for Bronco his name engraved crystal glasses for like his alcohol.

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<v Speaker 3>He raves about them like he's so happy with these

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<v Speaker 3>be engraved.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but your dad is like that. Your dad is

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<v Speaker 2>really excited about everything that might do for so easy.

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<v Speaker 4>His screensaver is zoomed in photo of Tanya, just like

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<v Speaker 4>you all know, so her getting him something.

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<v Speaker 1>He has three children.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, it's just med, it's just me, but it's literally

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<v Speaker 3>just me.

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<v Speaker 5>So and it is a zoomed in photo of me.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you can see he did.

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<v Speaker 1>Cropped everyone else in the photo.

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<v Speaker 3>I think, yeah, yeah, but he is just the face. No, no,

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<v Speaker 3>nothing else necessary.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow, we'll be like.

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<v Speaker 4>I remember I went to dinner with him one time

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<v Speaker 4>and we were sitting across and I just saw him.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm sitting next to Tanya and then her mom and

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<v Speaker 4>dad are across the table from us, and I just

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<v Speaker 4>see him take his phone out and she's like, oh no,

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<v Speaker 4>oh no, He's.

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<v Speaker 2>Like, look how beautiful, and it's just assumed him photo.

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<v Speaker 2>It's really sweet.

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<v Speaker 4>Seriously, So I get why you getting him those glasses

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<v Speaker 4>he raves about.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, so it's the generic thing that's that's I'm having.

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<v Speaker 2>A cool headphones or something.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, I would like that.

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<v Speaker 5>With the wires.

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<v Speaker 2>Socks are nice.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, everybody loves a nice cozy sock. No, not even

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<v Speaker 3>like a pair of dress socks, warm feet.

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<v Speaker 5>Warm, muterus.

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<v Speaker 1>What they say, Yeah, what the.

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<v Speaker 5>Guys they're worried about. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't be excited about socks, but I would see

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<v Speaker 1>the practicality of them.

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<v Speaker 5>They're like, Okay, I'm shook by that.

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<v Speaker 4>It'd be one of those things that maybe weren't excited about,

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<v Speaker 4>but you would probably on and.

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<v Speaker 2>Be like, oh what a great gift.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah cozy, yeah cozy. Yeah, Well thank you.

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<v Speaker 2>Continue to think on that. Yeah, let's get into dear

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<v Speaker 2>Bonia from anonymous.

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<v Speaker 1>My husband and I were both widowed in twenty twenty

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<v Speaker 1>and got married and only twenty five. We have four

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<v Speaker 1>children between us. His late wife was a stay at

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<v Speaker 1>home mom. I've always worked full time and value having

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<v Speaker 1>my own income and my own independence. Lately, I've been

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<v Speaker 1>feeling run down. My husband, who owns his own business,

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<v Speaker 1>says I don't have to work and he can afford

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<v Speaker 1>for me to stay home. However, he does not believe

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<v Speaker 1>in having a joint bank account, so if I stopped working,

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<v Speaker 1>the expectation would be that I would ask him for

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<v Speaker 1>money when I need it. I appreciate that he's willing

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<v Speaker 1>to support our family, but I also feel uncomfortable with

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<v Speaker 1>the idea of not having my own income or access

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<v Speaker 1>to shared finances. I'm thirty six, he's forty one. Am

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<v Speaker 1>I overthinking this or does that arrangement seem a little concerning?

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<v Speaker 2>I personally don't like it.

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<v Speaker 3>Personally, Yeah, I know it's tough because I think everybody

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<v Speaker 3>has like their own comfort, comfort fortability. I just comfort

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<v Speaker 3>comfort period in this category. But I would be uncomfortable

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<v Speaker 3>with this situation. I was having this conversation the other

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<v Speaker 3>day with a friend of mine. We both are like,

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<v Speaker 3>are you know working girlies? And we have a friend

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<v Speaker 3>that just like quit her job to be a stay

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<v Speaker 3>at home mom, and we were like thinking, and I'm like,

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<v Speaker 3>I just couldn't not that Robbie would ever like make

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<v Speaker 3>me feel weird or like say no, or but like

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<v Speaker 3>just saying the words like hey, can I buy this

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<v Speaker 3>bag to like get his approval for it would just

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<v Speaker 3>make me feel so icky, Like I just wouldn't like

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<v Speaker 3>it for me personally, I know there are people out

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<v Speaker 3>there that don't care and they wouldn't mind doing it,

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<v Speaker 3>and that do it all the time. Yeah, and that's

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<v Speaker 3>there there. So I think it's like if you're questioning

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<v Speaker 3>it and you're writing into us saying it makes you

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<v Speaker 3>feel uncomfortable, I feel like you're more like us and

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<v Speaker 3>you're going to be uncomfortable.

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<v Speaker 4>I also think if you've had a life where you

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<v Speaker 4>have been independent and had your own income and then

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<v Speaker 4>all of a sudden having to switch to that mindset,

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<v Speaker 4>I think is way harder than if you got married

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<v Speaker 4>young and you were a stay at home mom from

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<v Speaker 4>a young age and that was kind of like the

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<v Speaker 4>arrangement that you had.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>I also wonder if maybe you could have a conversation

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<v Speaker 4>where you said, like, maybe there's an amount that you're allotted,

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<v Speaker 4>and like if you go beyond that budget, like maybe

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<v Speaker 4>you have a budget of like just a budget to

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<v Speaker 4>where you don't have to ask for money up to

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<v Speaker 4>or like ask for things to a certain amount, and

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<v Speaker 4>then once you reach a certain budget, you just say, hey, like,

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<v Speaker 4>do you mind if I get this and that?

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<v Speaker 2>Way you still kind of have both you know what

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<v Speaker 2>I'm saying. But yeah, I agree.

0:10:31.160 --> 0:10:34.120
<v Speaker 4>I think you writing in already feeling uncomfortable means that

0:10:35.200 --> 0:10:40.440
<v Speaker 4>if this worthy arrangement in real life, you would definitely

0:10:40.440 --> 0:10:43.679
<v Speaker 4>feel uncomfortable. Yeah, but I think maybe there's a conversation

0:10:43.760 --> 0:10:48.880
<v Speaker 4>of like, hey, how do we do this to where

0:10:48.920 --> 0:10:50.240
<v Speaker 4>it could work for both of us?

0:10:50.360 --> 0:10:52.040
<v Speaker 2>Or is this is it?

0:10:52.080 --> 0:10:52.160
<v Speaker 4>Is?

0:10:52.200 --> 0:10:52.320
<v Speaker 6>This?

0:10:52.520 --> 0:10:52.720
<v Speaker 1>Is it?

0:10:52.800 --> 0:10:54.600
<v Speaker 2>Like if you're going to be a stay at home mom,

0:10:54.640 --> 0:10:56.960
<v Speaker 2>this is the rule. I don't know.

0:10:57.120 --> 0:10:59.040
<v Speaker 5>I know I don't have a hard time I have.

0:10:59.240 --> 0:10:59.520
<v Speaker 4>I know.

0:10:59.559 --> 0:11:02.280
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, I also don't ever want Robbie to know

0:11:02.720 --> 0:11:06.839
<v Speaker 3>how much maintenance, how much money it takes to maintain myself.

0:11:07.120 --> 0:11:09.199
<v Speaker 5>Okay, he does not know.

0:11:09.760 --> 0:11:11.440
<v Speaker 3>He doesn't know how much I spend on my hair,

0:11:11.880 --> 0:11:15.160
<v Speaker 3>how much I you don't get my eyebrows wax whatever,

0:11:15.240 --> 0:11:17.360
<v Speaker 3>and how much my nails cost. Like I go every

0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:20.000
<v Speaker 3>however many weeks to the nail salon. He probably thinks

0:11:20.040 --> 0:11:21.800
<v Speaker 3>it's like ten dollars to get my nails painted, do

0:11:21.800 --> 0:11:21.960
<v Speaker 3>you know.

0:11:21.960 --> 0:11:22.319
<v Speaker 6>What I mean?

0:11:22.360 --> 0:11:24.679
<v Speaker 3>Like, he's no idea, and I don't want him knowing that.

0:11:24.840 --> 0:11:28.600
<v Speaker 3>I agree, I feel none of his business.

0:11:28.960 --> 0:11:31.200
<v Speaker 4>But I guess it depends on how how much you

0:11:31.240 --> 0:11:33.120
<v Speaker 4>don't want to mark anymore.

0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:35.160
<v Speaker 5>Yes, that too, I don't know.

0:11:35.240 --> 0:11:38.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm just all about having financial independence.

0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:39.640
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, but I know.

0:11:39.840 --> 0:11:42.520
<v Speaker 3>So we're talking about opening a joint bank account, keeping

0:11:42.520 --> 0:11:44.559
<v Speaker 3>our step keeping the ones that we have and opening

0:11:44.920 --> 0:11:47.640
<v Speaker 3>a joint one. And I'm like, I just don't need

0:11:47.720 --> 0:11:50.280
<v Speaker 3>him to see on a piece of paper, like how.

0:11:50.160 --> 0:11:52.720
<v Speaker 2>Much some of these charges he's a joint account for

0:11:52.800 --> 0:11:54.040
<v Speaker 2>your No, no, no, And.

0:11:54.040 --> 0:11:54.480
<v Speaker 6>That's the thing.

0:11:54.520 --> 0:11:56.120
<v Speaker 5>It's like, I lie to him, I tell him how

0:11:56.200 --> 0:11:57.040
<v Speaker 5>much you know he knows.

0:11:57.160 --> 0:11:58.920
<v Speaker 3>But I'm like, I think seeing it on like a

0:11:58.960 --> 0:12:00.560
<v Speaker 3>statement would really like.

0:12:01.080 --> 0:12:02.040
<v Speaker 5>Be jarring, jarring.

0:12:02.120 --> 0:12:05.959
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I don't know. I I feel like we might

0:12:06.000 --> 0:12:07.520
<v Speaker 2>need a little more details on this.

0:12:08.040 --> 0:12:09.800
<v Speaker 3>I think the fact that she's writing this in saying

0:12:09.840 --> 0:12:12.880
<v Speaker 3>she's feeling uncomfortable makes me feel like she's gonna be uncomfortable.

0:12:14.480 --> 0:12:18.080
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, personally, maybe you can.

0:12:18.200 --> 0:12:20.240
<v Speaker 4>Maybe you can take a break, take some time off

0:12:20.280 --> 0:12:22.960
<v Speaker 4>from working and try and go back to work.

0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:24.959
<v Speaker 5>Or maybe there's because she was saying.

0:12:27.960 --> 0:12:31.480
<v Speaker 3>Maybe there's a different job that she can do that

0:12:31.559 --> 0:12:33.800
<v Speaker 3>she enjoys part time.

0:12:34.360 --> 0:12:37.440
<v Speaker 4>But also why why can he? Why does he not

0:12:37.480 --> 0:12:41.200
<v Speaker 4>believe in having a joint bake account. That's also a

0:12:41.200 --> 0:12:43.800
<v Speaker 4>feel I feel like we should revisit maybe that conversation.

0:12:44.280 --> 0:12:47.600
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, I don't know.

0:12:47.640 --> 0:12:48.000
<v Speaker 2>Everybody.

0:12:48.120 --> 0:12:51.160
<v Speaker 3>Everybody does weird stuff, like I know married couples who

0:12:51.200 --> 0:12:53.920
<v Speaker 3>like venmo each other for the electricity bills, you know

0:12:53.960 --> 0:12:56.640
<v Speaker 3>what I mean, Like everybody has their own way of

0:12:56.679 --> 0:12:58.960
<v Speaker 3>dealing with things. So like I don't really fault him

0:12:59.000 --> 0:12:59.680
<v Speaker 3>for that, but.

0:13:00.200 --> 0:13:01.560
<v Speaker 2>I know, no, no, and I agree.

0:13:01.600 --> 0:13:04.439
<v Speaker 4>I mean I think everyone he's probably used to having

0:13:04.440 --> 0:13:07.080
<v Speaker 4>a certain amount of money and so then having someone

0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:10.520
<v Speaker 4>use that money that he's working for with ma an

0:13:10.559 --> 0:13:14.120
<v Speaker 4>adjustment for him too. I think you keep having conversations

0:13:14.160 --> 0:13:17.959
<v Speaker 4>about this, and then I also think that maybe you say, hey,

0:13:18.000 --> 0:13:20.040
<v Speaker 4>I'm going to take six months off work kind of

0:13:20.120 --> 0:13:23.480
<v Speaker 4>like recoup and see if I like this arrangement, and

0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:24.120
<v Speaker 4>if you don't.

0:13:24.000 --> 0:13:28.240
<v Speaker 2>Like it, go back to work. You're young, that's true. Yeah,

0:13:29.440 --> 0:13:29.880
<v Speaker 2>you're young.

0:13:30.400 --> 0:13:31.640
<v Speaker 5>She's the youth of our nation.

0:13:33.559 --> 0:13:57.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm thirty years old. I'm engaging an amazing man,

0:13:57.280 --> 0:13:59.640
<v Speaker 1>and we're getting married next year. For years, I have

0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:01.959
<v Speaker 1>questioned and explored my sexuality, and through therapy, I have

0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:05.000
<v Speaker 1>come to accept that I may be bisexual. I'm still

0:14:05.000 --> 0:14:07.960
<v Speaker 1>figuring out exactly how I identify it, but I'm finally

0:14:07.960 --> 0:14:11.160
<v Speaker 1>feeling comfortable being honest with myself. Recently, I worked up

0:14:11.200 --> 0:14:13.280
<v Speaker 1>the courage to share this with my fiancee. I assured

0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:16.240
<v Speaker 1>him that doesn't change anything about a relationship. I've explored

0:14:16.280 --> 0:14:18.880
<v Speaker 1>intimacy with women in the past, but he's the only

0:14:18.920 --> 0:14:21.080
<v Speaker 1>person I want to be with. This is simply a

0:14:21.080 --> 0:14:23.880
<v Speaker 1>part of myself I no longer want to ignore. While

0:14:23.920 --> 0:14:27.080
<v Speaker 1>the conversation did not go well. While he's generally supportive

0:14:27.120 --> 0:14:30.560
<v Speaker 1>of the LGBTQ plus community, he made some hurtful comments

0:14:30.560 --> 0:14:33.240
<v Speaker 1>that seemed rooted in his more traditional upbringing. It left

0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:35.160
<v Speaker 1>me feeling like he wanted me to be different from

0:14:35.200 --> 0:14:38.000
<v Speaker 1>who I really am now. The next day, he apologized,

0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:40.560
<v Speaker 1>acknowledged his reaction was wrong, and told me how much

0:14:40.560 --> 0:14:42.920
<v Speaker 1>he loves me. But now I'm feeling awkward and unsure

0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:45.040
<v Speaker 1>of how to move forward. I want to give him

0:14:45.080 --> 0:14:46.880
<v Speaker 1>time to process, but I also want to know that

0:14:46.920 --> 0:14:50.040
<v Speaker 1>my future husband fully accepts, supports and loves me for

0:14:50.120 --> 0:14:52.960
<v Speaker 1>who I am. How do I navigate the conversations that

0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:53.560
<v Speaker 1>come next?

0:14:54.400 --> 0:14:54.840
<v Speaker 3>This is.

0:14:56.640 --> 0:14:57.880
<v Speaker 5>Beyond my pay grade.

0:14:58.560 --> 0:15:00.680
<v Speaker 2>I mean this. I think this just as.

0:15:02.080 --> 0:15:02.280
<v Speaker 1>You know.

0:15:02.480 --> 0:15:04.760
<v Speaker 4>I think you being honest with yourself and being able

0:15:04.800 --> 0:15:07.280
<v Speaker 4>to share that information with him is a big, a

0:15:07.280 --> 0:15:09.200
<v Speaker 4>big deal for you, and I'm proud of you for

0:15:09.240 --> 0:15:12.160
<v Speaker 4>acknowledging it. And I also think that it's okay for

0:15:12.280 --> 0:15:16.120
<v Speaker 4>him to immediately feel like unsafe in that, because you know,

0:15:16.200 --> 0:15:18.360
<v Speaker 4>I think it's okay for him to go, wait, what

0:15:18.400 --> 0:15:18.840
<v Speaker 4>does that.

0:15:18.760 --> 0:15:19.320
<v Speaker 2>Mean for me?

0:15:19.880 --> 0:15:22.280
<v Speaker 4>If if you, even though you reassure him you just

0:15:22.320 --> 0:15:24.960
<v Speaker 4>want to be with him, that probably made him feel threatened.

0:15:25.120 --> 0:15:29.240
<v Speaker 4>And I think that him having that reaction doesn't excuse

0:15:29.320 --> 0:15:31.680
<v Speaker 4>him saying hurtful things. But I think maybe you just

0:15:31.720 --> 0:15:34.320
<v Speaker 4>need to reassure him that you want to be with him,

0:15:34.320 --> 0:15:36.240
<v Speaker 4>and this doesn't change how you feel about him or

0:15:36.280 --> 0:15:38.440
<v Speaker 4>your relationship or wanting to be Even if.

0:15:38.360 --> 0:15:41.480
<v Speaker 3>She wasn't bisexual, she's still attracted to other like to men.

0:15:41.600 --> 0:15:44.800
<v Speaker 4>So yeah, like, I guess maybe it just adds a

0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:47.280
<v Speaker 4>threat of like, Okay, I know it in terms of men,

0:15:47.360 --> 0:15:49.480
<v Speaker 4>she only wants to be with me, But what if

0:15:49.480 --> 0:15:52.440
<v Speaker 4>there's a woman that she's you know, attracted to more.

0:15:52.440 --> 0:15:55.960
<v Speaker 4>But I think he's probably seeking needing to feel safe

0:15:56.080 --> 0:15:59.160
<v Speaker 4>and seeking safety even with this new information. And I

0:15:59.160 --> 0:16:01.360
<v Speaker 4>don't think you should feel bad for sharing such an

0:16:01.400 --> 0:16:04.400
<v Speaker 4>important part of yourself. But I also think that maybe

0:16:04.440 --> 0:16:08.360
<v Speaker 4>he just needs to be reassured. So I think that

0:16:08.480 --> 0:16:11.680
<v Speaker 4>there's you know, he I think him acknowledging it and

0:16:11.760 --> 0:16:15.400
<v Speaker 4>apologizing is a big, big deal.

0:16:15.480 --> 0:16:17.080
<v Speaker 5>So you didn't go like ten toes down.

0:16:17.360 --> 0:16:20.960
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, And I also think that you know, you shared

0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:26.320
<v Speaker 4>something really vulnerable, and sometimes with those those moments and

0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:29.200
<v Speaker 4>then reactions that aren't exactly what we want, it can

0:16:29.240 --> 0:16:32.240
<v Speaker 4>feel a little uncomfortable and you need a little time

0:16:32.280 --> 0:16:34.520
<v Speaker 4>to readjust but I think you're going to be fine.

0:16:34.520 --> 0:16:36.840
<v Speaker 4>I think he acknowledged how he reacted was wrong, and

0:16:36.880 --> 0:16:39.080
<v Speaker 4>I think you shared something that's a very important part

0:16:39.080 --> 0:16:41.520
<v Speaker 4>of yourself, and I think you both did the best.

0:16:41.200 --> 0:16:43.400
<v Speaker 2>That you could with at that time.

0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:47.880
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, So I think I would just let him know

0:16:48.000 --> 0:16:50.880
<v Speaker 4>that he's safe and that you love him and in

0:16:51.400 --> 0:16:53.640
<v Speaker 4>your relationship is your priority and it was just a

0:16:53.640 --> 0:16:57.080
<v Speaker 4>part of yourself and something that you felt like you

0:16:57.120 --> 0:16:58.600
<v Speaker 4>needed to share for him to know.

0:16:59.200 --> 0:17:00.520
<v Speaker 2>Who you fully are are.

0:17:02.000 --> 0:17:02.680
<v Speaker 5>Great advice.

0:17:03.920 --> 0:17:08.320
<v Speaker 4>I didn't really give advice, but but congrats.

0:17:08.960 --> 0:17:11.640
<v Speaker 5>Yeah you're engaged. She's engaged.

0:17:11.720 --> 0:17:16.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, all right, So play the game next? Or

0:17:16.040 --> 0:17:17.320
<v Speaker 1>what do you want to do here? Yeah?

0:17:17.560 --> 0:17:20.560
<v Speaker 2>Game next? Okay, yeah, let's go. Okay, so do we

0:17:20.600 --> 0:17:24.400
<v Speaker 2>need to leave? Should we do it to where oh?

0:17:24.480 --> 0:17:25.280
<v Speaker 5>Our head spinning?

0:17:25.440 --> 0:17:25.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:17:26.560 --> 0:17:28.760
<v Speaker 4>Should we do it to where we all? Because you

0:17:29.080 --> 0:17:30.600
<v Speaker 4>had to go to a meeting last time, that's why

0:17:30.600 --> 0:17:31.240
<v Speaker 4>you couldn't play.

0:17:32.080 --> 0:17:33.920
<v Speaker 1>Oh, I don't need to play. You guys should play? Oh?

0:17:33.920 --> 0:17:36.560
<v Speaker 4>Because I was thinking, we all write down someone and

0:17:36.600 --> 0:17:38.800
<v Speaker 4>put it on the person's and then we turn our

0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:43.720
<v Speaker 4>cameras around. Oh, and so that, and then the audience

0:17:43.760 --> 0:17:45.159
<v Speaker 4>also has to try and guess.

0:17:45.480 --> 0:17:46.879
<v Speaker 2>Oh you know what I'm saying.

0:17:46.960 --> 0:17:49.000
<v Speaker 5>I don't understand. I don't follow. But if you follow,

0:17:49.160 --> 0:17:49.919
<v Speaker 5>just tell me what to do.

0:17:50.040 --> 0:17:51.919
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you just you just sit there and.

0:17:53.640 --> 0:17:54.640
<v Speaker 1>Tell the listeners who we have.

0:17:55.200 --> 0:17:57.040
<v Speaker 2>I mean it could be a different way.

0:17:57.160 --> 0:17:58.919
<v Speaker 1>Instagrammers will know who we have because they'll be on

0:17:58.960 --> 0:17:59.480
<v Speaker 1>our forehead.

0:17:59.640 --> 0:18:04.960
<v Speaker 4>Yeah yeah, don't get to see it. But otherwise games, okay, okay,

0:18:05.000 --> 0:18:08.359
<v Speaker 4>whatever whatever you want. If it worked fine last time, Okay,

0:18:08.480 --> 0:18:10.040
<v Speaker 4>let's do it the way we did it last time.

0:18:10.480 --> 0:18:13.120
<v Speaker 4>And if people would like to do it this way

0:18:13.160 --> 0:18:14.560
<v Speaker 4>that I'm talking about, let us know.

0:18:15.720 --> 0:18:17.879
<v Speaker 3>I don't know if anyone's gonna understand what you're talking about.

0:18:18.760 --> 0:18:20.280
<v Speaker 3>I don't even know what to try what we're talking about.

0:18:20.359 --> 0:18:24.560
<v Speaker 4>I'm saying that Mark doesn't tell them, justus who are listening.

0:18:24.600 --> 0:18:26.520
<v Speaker 4>He doesn't tell them who we pick, and we just

0:18:26.520 --> 0:18:31.800
<v Speaker 4>play the game and they try to guess too. Oh

0:18:31.960 --> 0:18:35.640
<v Speaker 4>see if they can guess who we have. So it's

0:18:35.680 --> 0:18:39.000
<v Speaker 4>an immersive experience. But we'll do it the way that

0:18:39.040 --> 0:18:42.200
<v Speaker 4>we did it last time. So let's pause our videos, okay,

0:18:42.280 --> 0:18:44.400
<v Speaker 4>and we're gonna step out of the room. Mark's gonna

0:18:44.440 --> 0:18:45.000
<v Speaker 4>let them know who.

0:18:45.280 --> 0:19:06.640
<v Speaker 1>Well, we're gonna be right back, and we'll we're back.

0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:11.440
<v Speaker 1>They're out of the room. It's just me, all right.

0:19:11.520 --> 0:19:14.560
<v Speaker 1>So here are the celebrities that we have chosen for them.

0:19:14.600 --> 0:19:17.120
<v Speaker 1>And then Becca chose left hand, and in my left

0:19:17.119 --> 0:19:22.359
<v Speaker 1>hand was Pink in my right hand. So Tanya's person

0:19:22.480 --> 0:19:27.639
<v Speaker 1>is Paul Rudd. Becca is Pink, Tanya is Paul Rudd.

0:19:28.119 --> 0:19:30.760
<v Speaker 1>And now we'll bring them back, all right. They have

0:19:30.800 --> 0:19:33.960
<v Speaker 1>the post, it's on their head. Tanya has requested to

0:19:34.000 --> 0:19:34.520
<v Speaker 1>go first.

0:19:35.040 --> 0:19:35.560
<v Speaker 5>Can I have a pen?

0:19:35.640 --> 0:19:35.920
<v Speaker 6>Please?

0:19:35.920 --> 0:19:37.440
<v Speaker 1>Mark, You may have a pen? Sure?

0:19:38.400 --> 0:19:39.040
<v Speaker 5>Am I a man?

0:19:39.400 --> 0:19:42.040
<v Speaker 2>Yes? My a woman?

0:19:42.359 --> 0:19:45.119
<v Speaker 5>Yes? Am I a hot man?

0:19:46.920 --> 0:19:47.520
<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

0:19:47.640 --> 0:19:48.080
<v Speaker 6>I mean.

0:19:49.920 --> 0:19:51.000
<v Speaker 2>Isn't that subjective?

0:19:51.119 --> 0:19:53.280
<v Speaker 1>I think yes, though, I think yeah.

0:19:53.359 --> 0:19:54.800
<v Speaker 5>Is he known for being a handsome man?

0:19:54.920 --> 0:19:55.320
<v Speaker 4>Yeah? Yeah?

0:19:55.359 --> 0:19:55.679
<v Speaker 6>Okay.

0:19:57.160 --> 0:19:58.080
<v Speaker 2>Am I an actress?

0:19:59.040 --> 0:20:02.240
<v Speaker 5>No? Am I married?

0:20:04.359 --> 0:20:06.600
<v Speaker 1>No? No, I'm sorry? Yes?

0:20:06.760 --> 0:20:10.480
<v Speaker 2>Yes, oh married? Yeah I was like. Wait, Am I

0:20:10.520 --> 0:20:10.959
<v Speaker 2>a singer?

0:20:11.760 --> 0:20:14.600
<v Speaker 5>Yes? Am I an actor?

0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:17.879
<v Speaker 2>Yes? Am I married? Yes?

0:20:18.760 --> 0:20:19.520
<v Speaker 5>Do I have children?

0:20:20.560 --> 0:20:21.080
<v Speaker 2>I think so?

0:20:22.160 --> 0:20:22.560
<v Speaker 1>Yes?

0:20:24.800 --> 0:20:25.800
<v Speaker 2>Am I a pop singer?

0:20:26.280 --> 0:20:29.199
<v Speaker 5>Yes? Am I over fifty?

0:20:29.960 --> 0:20:33.639
<v Speaker 2>Yes? Am I younger than thirty?

0:20:34.040 --> 0:20:39.680
<v Speaker 5>No? I'm the hot man married actor? Have I won

0:20:39.720 --> 0:20:40.240
<v Speaker 5>an Oscar?

0:20:42.080 --> 0:20:42.760
<v Speaker 2>I don't think so.

0:20:43.320 --> 0:20:44.560
<v Speaker 5>No, no Oscar?

0:20:46.359 --> 0:20:47.560
<v Speaker 2>Am I younger than fifty?

0:20:49.280 --> 0:20:49.560
<v Speaker 5>Yes?

0:20:51.040 --> 0:20:51.119
<v Speaker 4>So?

0:20:52.880 --> 0:20:53.840
<v Speaker 5>Do I also sing?

0:20:56.000 --> 0:20:59.719
<v Speaker 2>No? Do I have a current hit on the radio?

0:21:00.119 --> 0:21:00.199
<v Speaker 3>No?

0:21:01.440 --> 0:21:02.480
<v Speaker 5>Am I on social media?

0:21:03.520 --> 0:21:06.160
<v Speaker 2>I mean you're not known for Okay, that's fair, that's fair.

0:21:07.359 --> 0:21:09.520
<v Speaker 2>Am I on tour currently?

0:21:10.720 --> 0:21:17.520
<v Speaker 5>No? Am I a movie or a TV actor? Sorry? Sorry?

0:21:17.560 --> 0:21:19.080
<v Speaker 5>So sorry? Am I a movie actor?

0:21:19.280 --> 0:21:22.840
<v Speaker 2>Yes? Am I a rapper?

0:21:24.440 --> 0:21:28.399
<v Speaker 5>No? Am I in any current movies?

0:21:28.480 --> 0:21:28.560
<v Speaker 6>Like?

0:21:28.840 --> 0:21:32.520
<v Speaker 5>Yeah this year twenty twenty six came out in twenty

0:21:32.560 --> 0:21:33.240
<v Speaker 5>twenty six? Yeah?

0:21:33.320 --> 0:21:33.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

0:21:34.520 --> 0:21:35.159
<v Speaker 5>Wow? Okay?

0:21:35.200 --> 0:21:36.200
<v Speaker 2>Do I have kids?

0:21:36.640 --> 0:21:41.359
<v Speaker 5>Yes? Is my current movie about outer space.

0:21:42.400 --> 0:21:46.480
<v Speaker 2>No, damn, Am I married to another celebrity?

0:21:47.480 --> 0:21:50.960
<v Speaker 5>I think so, I'd say so, I'd say so.

0:21:51.160 --> 0:21:55.359
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, Am I married to another celebrity?

0:21:55.880 --> 0:21:56.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't think so.

0:21:57.359 --> 0:21:58.919
<v Speaker 5>No, married to a normy?

0:22:00.400 --> 0:22:04.160
<v Speaker 2>Am I a singer from the two thousand's era?

0:22:04.960 --> 0:22:08.680
<v Speaker 5>Yes? Am I seventy plus?

0:22:09.160 --> 0:22:09.400
<v Speaker 3>No?

0:22:10.280 --> 0:22:10.639
<v Speaker 5>Okay?

0:22:11.520 --> 0:22:13.159
<v Speaker 2>Am I from a group?

0:22:13.640 --> 0:22:13.720
<v Speaker 6>No?

0:22:14.760 --> 0:22:17.280
<v Speaker 5>Have I seen this movie that I'm this man is

0:22:17.320 --> 0:22:18.400
<v Speaker 5>in currently?

0:22:19.480 --> 0:22:25.080
<v Speaker 2>I don't think so. Huh DoD blonde hair.

0:22:29.080 --> 0:22:34.440
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna say the answer is yes, So I'm under seventy,

0:22:34.840 --> 0:22:36.000
<v Speaker 3>I'm over fifty?

0:22:38.280 --> 0:22:40.840
<v Speaker 5>Hawtie? Am I household name?

0:22:41.119 --> 0:22:41.639
<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

0:22:41.880 --> 0:22:42.159
<v Speaker 5>I am?

0:22:42.320 --> 0:22:44.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Is my name a color?

0:22:50.840 --> 0:22:51.080
<v Speaker 6>Yes?

0:22:54.440 --> 0:22:59.280
<v Speaker 5>This is so annoying. I have no idea who this is?

0:23:00.119 --> 0:23:01.359
<v Speaker 5>Go am my Brad Pitt?

0:23:01.600 --> 0:23:02.920
<v Speaker 2>No my pink?

0:23:03.080 --> 0:23:04.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:23:05.200 --> 0:23:06.000
<v Speaker 5>Should I keep going?

0:23:06.960 --> 0:23:08.480
<v Speaker 2>I mean sure?

0:23:08.480 --> 0:23:10.480
<v Speaker 1>We give her a clue, Yeah, give me some clues.

0:23:11.400 --> 0:23:22.680
<v Speaker 6>Comedy seth Rogen, friends, Joey Tribbiani, Cotney Cox, you're a man?

0:23:22.880 --> 0:23:30.720
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, Matthew Perry No, Ross Skeeller No friends?

0:23:31.040 --> 0:23:34.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, useful? Clueless?

0:23:37.520 --> 0:23:44.800
<v Speaker 5>Oh and oh the nick Jo.

0:23:48.280 --> 0:23:50.159
<v Speaker 2>Stupid, stupid.

0:23:50.760 --> 0:23:52.160
<v Speaker 5>I'm so bad at this game.

0:23:52.760 --> 0:23:54.960
<v Speaker 2>You're so satisfying how bad you are.

0:23:55.760 --> 0:23:57.960
<v Speaker 3>It's like when I tell you Paul Rudd wasn't even

0:23:57.960 --> 0:24:00.560
<v Speaker 3>on my radar. It was like Brad Pitt, George Clooney.

0:24:01.359 --> 0:24:03.679
<v Speaker 4>My favorite thing though, is that your job and like

0:24:03.800 --> 0:24:07.680
<v Speaker 4>everything you do is in the industry, like you are in.

0:24:07.480 --> 0:24:10.439
<v Speaker 3>This probably I think I'm like it's like analysis paralysis,

0:24:10.520 --> 0:24:11.760
<v Speaker 3>do you know what I mean? Like, I'm just my

0:24:11.960 --> 0:24:14.920
<v Speaker 3>mind has so many names in it that it's.

0:24:14.760 --> 0:24:17.600
<v Speaker 1>Like I would never pick Brad Pitt of George Clooney.

0:24:17.640 --> 0:24:19.840
<v Speaker 1>I would never go somewhere that famous. My goal in

0:24:19.840 --> 0:24:22.120
<v Speaker 1>this game is to find someone everyone knows. But it's

0:24:22.160 --> 0:24:26.000
<v Speaker 1>kind of nice, not yeah nice, not super super famous.

0:24:26.080 --> 0:24:27.600
<v Speaker 5>Yeah well good tonight.

0:24:27.400 --> 0:24:29.280
<v Speaker 1>Like I wouldn't do Taylor Swift, I wouldn't do.

0:24:29.240 --> 0:24:31.520
<v Speaker 2>George right someone.

0:24:31.840 --> 0:24:35.399
<v Speaker 4>So the other day we included some people who are

0:24:35.440 --> 0:24:37.719
<v Speaker 4>no longer with us, So that added a new element

0:24:38.040 --> 0:24:39.320
<v Speaker 4>that adds a question.

0:24:39.080 --> 0:24:41.800
<v Speaker 1>Of yeah, am I life right? Right right? We could

0:24:41.840 --> 0:24:42.000
<v Speaker 1>do that.

0:24:42.119 --> 0:24:44.520
<v Speaker 4>I got Marilyn Monroe and I didn't get it. I

0:24:44.560 --> 0:24:45.520
<v Speaker 4>could not get it.

0:24:45.600 --> 0:24:47.680
<v Speaker 5>I would never get that.

0:24:48.119 --> 0:24:50.320
<v Speaker 4>It was so hard, and they were like that could

0:24:50.359 --> 0:24:52.920
<v Speaker 4>come on, and I was like, I gotta.

0:24:52.640 --> 0:24:54.480
<v Speaker 2>Think of anything. It was so hard.

0:24:55.000 --> 0:24:57.119
<v Speaker 5>Paul's not like known for being haughtie.

0:24:57.560 --> 0:24:59.880
<v Speaker 1>He is and Lolos agrees.

0:25:00.119 --> 0:25:02.919
<v Speaker 2>I think he was known he was people's sexiest man one.

0:25:03.000 --> 0:25:04.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, he definitely so.

0:25:04.080 --> 0:25:06.320
<v Speaker 3>I think if you're on the people are like steering

0:25:06.359 --> 0:25:08.440
<v Speaker 3>me to like the George clooneyes and the Brad pict If.

0:25:08.359 --> 0:25:10.359
<v Speaker 1>You win sexiest Man Alive, you could argue that that

0:25:10.400 --> 0:25:11.760
<v Speaker 1>person is known for being handsome.

0:25:11.880 --> 0:25:14.399
<v Speaker 5>Being handsome is also known for being funny.

0:25:14.640 --> 0:25:17.680
<v Speaker 4>No, he's definitely known for like aging really well and like.

0:25:18.200 --> 0:25:21.240
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, just like a technicality that could have led me

0:25:21.280 --> 0:25:21.480
<v Speaker 5>down a.

0:25:21.480 --> 0:25:23.959
<v Speaker 1>Different So he was sexiest in twenty one, it's not

0:25:24.000 --> 0:25:24.400
<v Speaker 1>like it was.

0:25:24.520 --> 0:25:26.440
<v Speaker 5>Thirty five years ago.

0:25:29.000 --> 0:25:32.360
<v Speaker 2>Well, I have to go get ready day, it's time

0:25:32.440 --> 0:25:32.600
<v Speaker 2>to go.

0:25:32.800 --> 0:25:36.680
<v Speaker 4>It's a big night, big day, and uh it starts now.

0:25:36.920 --> 0:25:37.480
<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

0:25:37.560 --> 0:25:40.880
<v Speaker 4>But if you ever want to ride in or have

0:25:41.000 --> 0:25:44.800
<v Speaker 4>some suggestions of fun celebrities for us to train, I guess.

0:25:44.400 --> 0:25:46.439
<v Speaker 1>New games, you might be get a new game we

0:25:46.480 --> 0:25:48.960
<v Speaker 1>would be good at, or one if you would be

0:25:48.960 --> 0:25:49.280
<v Speaker 1>good at.

0:25:49.359 --> 0:25:51.320
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, Like if you see a game from like three

0:25:51.359 --> 0:25:53.960
<v Speaker 4>months ago that it was really popular, let us know,

0:25:54.040 --> 0:25:56.119
<v Speaker 4>because that's when we how we like to jump on.

0:25:56.600 --> 0:25:58.959
<v Speaker 4>We like to do it after everyone's done with it. So,

0:25:59.720 --> 0:26:01.800
<v Speaker 4>but if if you ever want to write in a

0:26:02.040 --> 0:26:05.520
<v Speaker 4>DMS on Instagram at scrubbing in, pod or message us

0:26:05.520 --> 0:26:07.399
<v Speaker 4>at scrubbing in or email us at scrubbing in.

0:26:07.520 --> 0:26:08.800
<v Speaker 2>iHeartMedia dot com.

0:26:08.960 --> 0:26:19.080
<v Speaker 4>We love you so by love you, bye bye