Speaker 1: I think that this country, this culture, this age, this
Speaker 1: generation me included all of us. I think we have
Speaker 1: a problem with being content. I see different cultures that
Speaker 1: don't have this problem, and different generations. Our grandparents didn't
Speaker 1: seem to have this problem. Bernie Calco back on the podcast. Yes,
Speaker 1: thanks today, Thank you for having me back. Man, dude,
Speaker 1: I was thinking about it. You're such a busy guy.
Speaker 1: You have all of these companies, you run construction businesses
Speaker 1: and design businesses, and then you live, depending on traffic,
Speaker 1: at least forty five minutes away from here. I work
Speaker 1: forty five minutes from here, so our office forty five minutes.
Speaker 1: I live another twenty minutes away from that the other
Speaker 1: way from here. So what so, So two questions. One first,
Speaker 1: we'll start with gratefulness. Thank you for coming this far
Speaker 1: for this podcast. I know the listeners love it when
Speaker 1: you're here. And and then what do you do on
Speaker 1: the trip? I mean you have to you come so often,
Speaker 1: you must have some kind of routine. Well, let me say,
Speaker 1: appreciate you having me. It's it's a privilege for me,
Speaker 1: and it's just fun, like it's good to catch up
Speaker 1: with you and to you know, chop up some of
Speaker 1: these questions and you know, let the the rest of
Speaker 1: the internet kind of hear what we have to say.
Speaker 1: Is there a specific routine you do in the way
Speaker 1: or do you just I actually usually come in with
Speaker 1: like a drink, you don't have it today? Yeah, No,
Speaker 1: I listened to the Graingersmith podcast like a good way
Speaker 1: to like just start, So the one that that you
Speaker 1: and chat did last week. I listened to that one
Speaker 1: on the way up today. But I don't know if
Speaker 1: there's a specific fig routine I do. Like you said,
Speaker 1: we don't prepare for this in a typical way of like, yeah, hey,
Speaker 1: here's this, here's the plan. But I think we both
Speaker 1: and I would say Chad and Parker and Ahbur are
Speaker 1: like we prepare for this every morning, right, Like we
Speaker 1: we just have time of just stillness and to listen
Speaker 1: and to reflect and to pray. Hey God, whatever question
Speaker 1: is thrown at us, like give us the words, give
Speaker 1: us the tools that will be benefits a podcast or not. Right,
Speaker 1: So yeah, that kind of like prepares us for this
Speaker 1: in some way. So I do a little bit of
Speaker 1: that if I haven't caught up on some you know,
Speaker 1: podcasts or listen to music but yeah, it's about it. Man,
Speaker 1: you usually have a drink with you? What is it,
Speaker 1: like sonic or something? What is a drink you usually have? Oh,
Speaker 1: it's a Chick fil A, but it's ice water. I
Speaker 1: go to Chick fil A and get a large ice
Speaker 1: water cup and I carry it around all the time.
Speaker 1: It's at my office. I forgot it. So why do
Speaker 1: you go to Chick fil A to get ice water?
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's better. Okay, the ice is awesome. No,
Speaker 1: sonic ice is awesome. I'll give him that. But I
Speaker 1: don't know. When you have kids and you live near
Speaker 1: Chick fil A, it's like you just go to Chick
Speaker 1: fil A. That's kind of what you do. And I
Speaker 1: just get a large Chick fil A ice water. It
Speaker 1: makes sense, well, regardless of how you get here and
Speaker 1: why you come here. I just want everyone to know
Speaker 1: that Bernie travels a long way and he's a very
Speaker 1: busy guy, so it means a lot that he comes
Speaker 1: all the way from South Austin way up to North
Speaker 1: Austin and everything in between to do this. This podcast
Speaker 1: is basically me and Bernie sitting around with you as
Speaker 1: if we're around a campfire and we're gonna answer your questions.
Speaker 1: If you're new to this podcast, you email Grangersmith podcast
Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. Will answer anything you have, could
Speaker 1: be about any subject. We're gonna dive into it right now.
Speaker 1: Can I add one more person to the campfire? Yeah,
Speaker 1: because we've said before that it's you and me and
Speaker 1: this person. Yeah right, yeah. But like I said, I
Speaker 1: try to stay off the comments on YouTube whenever I'm
Speaker 1: on here, Just Here Go and sanity. Yeah, but I
Speaker 1: was reading and there's I think that the listeners are
Speaker 1: the fourth person. O good because in the comments section
Speaker 1: there's a lot of like really good stuff that they say.
Speaker 1: So we're inviting you into the campfire. I loved reading
Speaker 1: some of the comments from the podcast last week about
Speaker 1: what they thought about this subject or that. So yeah,
Speaker 1: that's fourth person. So our uh based on the listener.
Speaker 1: But I think the last I checked, the largest audience
Speaker 1: of this podcast is listening on the Apple podcast app. Okay,
Speaker 1: and that's about five times what's listening on YouTube. The Yeah,
Speaker 1: the Spotify is pretty high as well, So so shout
Speaker 1: out to Spotify, Shout shout out to Apple Podcasts, Shout
Speaker 1: out to our YouTube listeners. I don't. I know there's more.
Speaker 1: I can't think of other ways that people are listening.
Speaker 1: But but I guess I'm saying that because not everyone
Speaker 1: could keep comment, but YouTube can. That's I didn't know interesting, right,
Speaker 1: I didn't know that there were that many people on
Speaker 1: the other platforms listening. Yeah. Wow, So we're gonna start
Speaker 1: with an easy one. Okay. It says advice on learning guitar, Bernie.
Speaker 1: I feel like we we get this a lot, and
Speaker 1: I'll just keep answering it because as as it comes in,
Speaker 1: I think it's important. It says, Hey, Grander, my name
Speaker 1: is Ashton, I'm fifteen years old. I'm wondering what advice
Speaker 1: would you get for someone who wants to learn guitar?
Speaker 1: Thank you God bless Ashton Peck Class of twenty twenty four.
Speaker 1: So how did you learn guitar? This was back in
Speaker 1: the day for the internet. I went to Sears and
Speaker 1: I got their catalog. Okay, like sounds like this is
Speaker 1: coming out of nineteen fifty what I'm actually one hundred
Speaker 1: and thirty two years old. I went to Sears, went
Speaker 1: to the catalog, and I went and paid the money,
Speaker 1: and then I waited like six to eight weeks for
Speaker 1: that little guitar to come in, and in the magazine
Speaker 1: it looks like this, like awesome guitar, right yeah, And
Speaker 1: it comes in and it's like this big. It's like
Speaker 1: a ty I have no idea. No, I don't have it.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, sold I started. I really wanted to play,
Speaker 1: and my mom basically said, well, if you really want
Speaker 1: to play, you'll learn on that one, and then once
Speaker 1: you show me like that you're into this thing, then
Speaker 1: we'll get you like another one. And so I had
Speaker 1: to play that little thing and it was terrible, and
Speaker 1: so I don't I didn't have a teacher. I didn't
Speaker 1: I would like ask a buddy, like, hey, I would
Speaker 1: get some chord charts and just start with putting my
Speaker 1: hands on the chords and strumming, practicing strum patterns. But
Speaker 1: that's how I got my first guitar the world. That's
Speaker 1: I'm guessing you have a story. I'm guessing you have
Speaker 1: a very different story. Well, I mean I didn't go
Speaker 1: to series and wait six weeks. I mean that sounded
Speaker 1: like Grandpa's story, but it happened. But my story isn't
Speaker 1: that different. I just didn't go by it. It was
Speaker 1: when I knew I wanted to play because I saw
Speaker 1: other friends in junior high that were playing, and they
Speaker 1: always the girls loved those guys that always. I was like, man,
Speaker 1: those guys, the girls loved those guys. And so I
Speaker 1: was fourteen when it just I was like, I have
Speaker 1: to learn, because I thought, if I'm fourteen and I
Speaker 1: learned now, and I and give me about three or
Speaker 1: four years, I'll be junior senior in high schooling around
Speaker 1: some campfire playing guitar, and like everyone would be looking
Speaker 1: at me. That's what I was thinking as a fourteen,
Speaker 1: that nobody looked at me when I was fourteen, So
Speaker 1: I thought that would be awesome. So there was one
Speaker 1: in my in the closet of my house that my
Speaker 1: grandmother had given up on. So it's like this old guitar.
Speaker 1: It's actually in the room next door, but it was
Speaker 1: in the case and it had a little book in
Speaker 1: there that said where to put your fingers. So I
Speaker 1: just opened the book was under the guitar. It was
Speaker 1: like all predestined for me or something that's like that.
Speaker 1: But for asking, that's not really answering your question, because
Speaker 1: you're not going to just go to seers or open
Speaker 1: up your closet and get grandma's guitar. Is his question.
Speaker 1: How do you get the guitar? I think it's or
Speaker 1: how do you start? Like he says, what's your advice
Speaker 1: to someone who wants to learn? So first you got
Speaker 1: to get one, got to get one, and they're everywhere now,
Speaker 1: I mean pawnshops, they're everywhere. I wouldn't spend for you,
Speaker 1: for brand new. This is what I would do right now.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't spend anything over a buck fifty. I wouldn't
Speaker 1: go over one hundred and fifty bucks. You could easily
Speaker 1: go to Guitar Center and they're going to talk you
Speaker 1: into the three one hundred and seventy five dollars to
Speaker 1: four hundred dollar guitar. For sure. I would get a
Speaker 1: cheap guitar and then take it to a mom and
Speaker 1: pop guitar shop and say, hey, listen Ashton, tell them
Speaker 1: lower the action and add some nylon strings. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: what I was gonna say. Nil on strings will definitely
Speaker 1: help when your first get started. Yeah, getting the thing
Speaker 1: set up right, Yeah, from a mom and pop shop
Speaker 1: bead and they might look at you like what, but
Speaker 1: just say no. I learned it on the Grander Smith podcast.
Speaker 1: Put nylon strings on air. It's good for your fingers.
Speaker 1: You're not gonna wear out your fingers. So and then
Speaker 1: after that I would go to YouTube. Actually, Lincoln and
Speaker 1: London have been learning instruments or trying to, and I've
Speaker 1: been sending them to you to just say watch this,
Speaker 1: so yeah, we don't have that. Find some of your
Speaker 1: favorite songs and go to like, uh, man, what's the
Speaker 1: app guitar, Ultimate Guitar or something like that, and you
Speaker 1: can find Like that was when I kind of something
Speaker 1: kind of shifted for me. Whenever I could play Tears
Speaker 1: in Heaven, right, I could, I could hear these songs
Speaker 1: and then I started like, Okay, I mean it's you
Speaker 1: got to squint a little bit, you know, but it's
Speaker 1: it's there. Yeah, that's a great point because you need
Speaker 1: that motivation of fulfilling an idea in your head of
Speaker 1: playing a song you love instead of Man, I've been
Speaker 1: through six lessons and always doing is telling me the
Speaker 1: frets and the string numbers and notes, and so you
Speaker 1: could you don't want to hurt your fingers and you
Speaker 1: don't want to get caught up in this mumbo jumbo
Speaker 1: music jargon that get bored. So, yeah, he's fifteen. He's fifteen. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a good age. Good move, dude, Yeah, you'll appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Greater job, bro, Let's go on to one. It's called
Speaker 1: life advice. Okay, says Hattie Granger and guest host. That
Speaker 1: was kind of rude. Yeah. My name is Eric. I
Speaker 1: live in the great state of Washington, Eastern Washington. That is,
Speaker 1: I'm married. I'm a married man of six years the September.
Speaker 1: I have three beautiful boys, Sawyer, Timber Wesley. That's great names.
Speaker 1: I said. I'll try to make this as short as possible,
Speaker 1: but I really need some advice. For seven years now,
Speaker 1: I've worked at the same job and have slowly progressed
Speaker 1: my way up in the company. I'm at the point
Speaker 1: where I've almost reached my climax within this company, and
Speaker 1: I'm not happy and I don't want to settle. I
Speaker 1: have other job operas and opportunities that I could take,
Speaker 1: but it just scares me starting all over and having
Speaker 1: to feed for feed. Four months during the pandemic, I
Speaker 1: was very fortunate to not be furloughed, which made me
Speaker 1: feel grateful working here, but I don't want to be
Speaker 1: content and continued to be unhappy at the same time.
Speaker 1: Change is very scary for me. I have high hopes
Speaker 1: and I hope that you have the right advice for me.
Speaker 1: Love everything you're doing with your podcast. God bless you
Speaker 1: and your family. Ye ye, ps, we'll see you in
Speaker 1: August at the Waterford Fair. Awesome. Eric H. So we've
Speaker 1: seen this before. This is this is a family man,
Speaker 1: three kids, three boys, married for six years, in a job,
Speaker 1: wondering if there's something else out there, wondering if there's
Speaker 1: if the grass is greener, if there's if he's if there's,
Speaker 1: if he's capable of more, feeling like he's capable of more?
Speaker 1: What is there out there? What do you say this, dude?
Speaker 1: We've been here, We've been there. Yeah, And I think
Speaker 1: sometimes I think we can get we can dissect these
Speaker 1: questions like down to the you know, very very minutia
Speaker 1: of it. When really I think there's two things. If
Speaker 1: if the guy's a believer, I think the process and
Speaker 1: the outcome may be very different, and maybe even the
Speaker 1: advice of the advice would be different. But the way
Speaker 1: that I tend to think to approach things is you
Speaker 1: may call me wrong, but you'll never call me indecisive.
Speaker 1: So I tend to take this stance of I'm going
Speaker 1: to pray about this. I'm going to spend some time
Speaker 1: in the stillness and think, like, God, what direction do
Speaker 1: you want me to go? I'm going to make a decision.
Speaker 1: And when you got kids in a family, there's definitely
Speaker 1: like input from your wife and you have to be
Speaker 1: on the same page. But man, when people just kind
Speaker 1: of linger in this like oh should we I want
Speaker 1: to do? But I'm not happy here. Life's too short, dude,
Speaker 1: make a decision and move on on. Yeah, And whether
Speaker 1: that's like in your career, Hey, I made a decision. Man,
Speaker 1: I'm here and I'm gonna like be here going all
Speaker 1: in on this or I don't know what's next, but
Speaker 1: I know that God's got me. I'm gonna make the
Speaker 1: decision and we're going to go and it's an adventure.
Speaker 1: It'll either way. It will be fun. You might call
Speaker 1: me wrong, but you'll never call me indecisive. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: love that. I don't think you can quote me on that.
Speaker 1: I think I said that. You probably read it in
Speaker 1: a book, but it's still is. I haven't heard it
Speaker 1: before and it sounds awesome and it's great. It's great
Speaker 1: motivation for Eric to say, hey, man, what kind of
Speaker 1: man are you you? You got that's not afraid to
Speaker 1: be wrong, that's more afraid to be indecisive than it
Speaker 1: is to be wrong. And then on the flip side
Speaker 1: of this whole thing, Eric, I think that's great advice
Speaker 1: from Burns. From on the flip side of this whole thing,
Speaker 1: I think that this country, this culture, this this age
Speaker 1: that's just generation me included all of us. I think
Speaker 1: we have a problem with being content. And I see
Speaker 1: different cultures that don't have this problem, and different generations
Speaker 1: our grandparents didn't seem to have this problem. Where do
Speaker 1: you think the problem started or comes continues to perpetuate from.
Speaker 1: Let me say, I don't exactly know. I mean, we
Speaker 1: could talk it through. But the Mexican culture, for example,
Speaker 1: seems to be a culture that's very content and that
Speaker 1: contentment equals happiness. And I don't see, Man, I'm trying
Speaker 1: to figure out how to say this the right way.
Speaker 1: But I could just I could just be blunt about it.
Speaker 1: But the guys that have built this house, there are
Speaker 1: different cultures of men that have built this house. I've
Speaker 1: seen in the Mexican culture just they're always uplifting, they're
Speaker 1: always in good spirits. They're always content, whether it's raining
Speaker 1: or hot or cold, and I don't see complaining. But
Speaker 1: there's other cultures. The white culture the number one that
Speaker 1: they complain that it's always something wrong with the weather
Speaker 1: or the time of day, it's too early, or something
Speaker 1: is too hard. And I'm thinking in my mind that
Speaker 1: it's a cultural thing because they're probably thinking, and I
Speaker 1: hope I'm not offending anybody. I think I can because
Speaker 1: I am that culture, But in my mind, they're thinking, man,
Speaker 1: I should be the boss of this One day, I'm
Speaker 1: going to be the boss of this organization and I'll
Speaker 1: be running my hours here. And you don't see that
Speaker 1: as much in other cultures that are just content with
Speaker 1: working and content with what they're doing, and that equals
Speaker 1: so much more happiness. Now, it's a great point have
Speaker 1: to kind of argue though that at the same time,
Speaker 1: a guy like Eric, you know, that's in a lot
Speaker 1: of ways men like that advanced the culture because they
Speaker 1: were not content. So where do you draw the line
Speaker 1: between well, we need to we need to advance the
Speaker 1: family and in advance the culture, but we also just
Speaker 1: need to be content. Yeah, So if we go to
Speaker 1: the Bible, though, it's going to say Paul says, I've
Speaker 1: learned to be content in any circumstance. So I think
Speaker 1: that's where it goes back to, like getting into the
Speaker 1: stillness and you know, like in James where it says,
Speaker 1: don't say I'm gonna go here or there for a
Speaker 1: year and do business, but instead like, if God wants
Speaker 1: me to do this, this is what I'm gonna do. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I think we can take you know, our own
Speaker 1: stance on things and our own desire and our own will,
Speaker 1: and then that's what drives us, like, well, I want
Speaker 1: that big house, and this job isn't given me the
Speaker 1: means to get that big house. And say, what if
Speaker 1: God doesn't want you to have that big house? Are
Speaker 1: you content with the medium sized house that's probably bigger
Speaker 1: than ninety eight percent of the houses in the free world?
Speaker 1: Like yeah, how long how long was your dad a
Speaker 1: police officer? Thirty years? So it's it. Don't you think
Speaker 1: it's kind of rare that someone's like just retired from
Speaker 1: the department how long thirty years? Or where'd you where'd
Speaker 1: your dad work he worked at the factory? How long?
Speaker 1: Thirty eight years? That's rare, is Yeah. Today you would
Speaker 1: ask somebody and they would say, well, I work here
Speaker 1: for five and here for work for Dell Computer from seven.
Speaker 1: So here's Eric. Yeah, that's a very interesting concept. I
Speaker 1: think you're you're kind of hitting into something that's more
Speaker 1: like I think there's layers to that, like what advancement
Speaker 1: have we had in our society? And maybe it's Western, yeah,
Speaker 1: but maybe it's just global connection technology. What what opened
Speaker 1: up that all of a sudden completely raised the expectation
Speaker 1: of what we deserve and lowered the contentment. There's guys
Speaker 1: right out here, right outside this wall that are working
Speaker 1: on the mortar work. They're working on the brick laying.
Speaker 1: If I was going to ask them what their their
Speaker 1: career dreams would be, they they would probably say, well,
Speaker 1: this is great, I'll just do I'm just going to
Speaker 1: do this. I envy that in a way. So Eric,
Speaker 1: I would ask you this to kind of try to
Speaker 1: help sum this up for you to hopefully meet you
Speaker 1: meet your expectation of a good, good answer from us.
Speaker 1: I would I would dig deep to why you're feeling
Speaker 1: like you need to move jobs? Is it? What kind
Speaker 1: of unrest are you having? Is it? Can you realize
Speaker 1: that this is a kind of unrest that no matter
Speaker 1: what job you get into, you're still going to be
Speaker 1: not content, You're still going to be restless. Or is
Speaker 1: it legitimately I'm not I'm not giving my full ability
Speaker 1: to this job. Or I could do more somewhere else.
Speaker 1: I have more to offer the world somewhere else. But
Speaker 1: are you able to realize when you hit that threshold?
Speaker 1: I wonder if this is deeper than just his work,
Speaker 1: because I'm just thinking about people that I've known that
Speaker 1: it's like, or that I know that we both know
Speaker 1: they're just not really content. They're always going to find
Speaker 1: something that's like, oh I could do this, I could
Speaker 1: do that. It's like those options just like constantly are
Speaker 1: They're looking for something else, and it's like, well, to
Speaker 1: get specific on you too, Eric, you say, I have
Speaker 1: other job offers and other opportunities that I could take,
Speaker 1: but it just scares me starting all over. Just throw
Speaker 1: that out the window, just take them to going to
Speaker 1: have to go back to what Bernie said at the beginning,
Speaker 1: that you only live once. But when you do this,
Speaker 1: when you do this process, you have to be very
Speaker 1: self aware that you need to know what the reasons
Speaker 1: you're doing. And if you're just just a not very
Speaker 1: just not content in any kind of situation, that's a
Speaker 1: problem you need to fix other than a job. Did
Speaker 1: he say how long he had been at his current No, No,
Speaker 1: he said, I've I've been here seven years. There is
Speaker 1: seven years. Seven years ain't that long, man? I know,
Speaker 1: in today's society maybe it's a long time, but it's
Speaker 1: not that long. It's long enough for you to know
Speaker 1: the culture of the company and the culture of and
Speaker 1: and the work that you're doing, and where your ceiling is.
Speaker 1: And so I don't know. I'm we'll have to, you know,
Speaker 1: get into this a little deeper another time. But I'm
Speaker 1: so interested by your thoughts on what you know that
Speaker 1: thought of Like, yeah, my dad was a police officer
Speaker 1: for thirty years, and this guy worked at this plant
Speaker 1: for thirty eight has never changed jobs as long as
Speaker 1: that was a lot. Where was it in our culture
Speaker 1: that we switched to like, oh, yeah, I've had five
Speaker 1: jobs in the last six years. Like what Yeah, So
Speaker 1: I bet you everyone listened to this podcast that has
Speaker 1: a parent that was born in the fifties or older
Speaker 1: would say that they only had one job the whole
Speaker 1: time they knew them. I think that that's something in
Speaker 1: the psyche and something in the heart. I don't know
Speaker 1: where it came from, but something's like, we're just not
Speaker 1: a content people. Yeah, let's go to let's go to
Speaker 1: Aiden here and his question, we'll have time for one
Speaker 1: more for a break. It says, subject line, very important time,
Speaker 1: mister Granger. I'm a big fan, been listening to your
Speaker 1: music for a while, and I'd like to keep my
Speaker 1: name unknown. Did I say his name already? I don't
Speaker 1: think nobody wanted you. Every time that I hear you
Speaker 1: read a question and it says I want to be anonymous,
Speaker 1: I think back to that one. He said, Uh, my
Speaker 1: girlfriend and I recently broke up because her parents disapproved
Speaker 1: of us. How can I gain their trust? Also, she
Speaker 1: has depression and I want to try to cure it myself.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that's possible. Bertie's not laughing at you, buddy,
Speaker 1: I don't know if that's possible. She was using the
Speaker 1: stuff that makes people high, but that's not good. Do
Speaker 1: you know how I could try to stop her? Depression.
Speaker 1: Have a good day, yeeky mister anonymous here anonymous secure depression.
Speaker 1: You cannot cure her depression? No? No, First of all,
Speaker 1: like they're broken up, right, yeah, because her parents didn't
Speaker 1: like him. Yes, yeah, But there's this multi layered. This
Speaker 1: very short question was very multiple. What was the question? First?
Speaker 1: He says, how could I gain their trust? Her parents?
Speaker 1: And the second question is do you know how I
Speaker 1: could try to stop her depression? So that's let's just
Speaker 1: say quickly no on that part, we cannot. We cannot
Speaker 1: help you stop her depression. But we could tell you
Speaker 1: to to to recommend getting medical help, professional help, and
Speaker 1: be support system. Yet boom, it doesn't get any deeper
Speaker 1: than that. You just Bernie said it. So then for
Speaker 1: her parents, this is tough one because you guys are
Speaker 1: already broken up. But how do you gain their trust? Well,
Speaker 1: first you got to be consistent. It's not about words,
Speaker 1: it's about actions. And so I would go to her dad.
Speaker 1: If this is something you actually pursuing, I would I
Speaker 1: would go to her dad and ask him to coffee
Speaker 1: or lunch, breakfast, dinner, iced tea, whatever, Chick fil a water,
Speaker 1: Chick fil a water, to say Uh, you know, mister,
Speaker 1: mister X girlfriend, I would love to take you out
Speaker 1: for a Chick fil a water ye sit down with
Speaker 1: him and and pour your heart out. And hey, if
Speaker 1: he doesn't, just if he doesn't approve of you, that
Speaker 1: this is uh, that's a serious red flag for you
Speaker 1: dating this girl. Mm hmm. I would have some follow
Speaker 1: up questions for our unknown guy. I think you did
Speaker 1: say his name and I'm just trying to avoid that.
Speaker 1: Did she break up with you and tell you we
Speaker 1: need to break up? My parents just don't like you,
Speaker 1: because if I'm this guy, I'm like, well that just
Speaker 1: is it just them or is it all of you
Speaker 1: that don't like me? Yeah, it's tough to We see
Speaker 1: this a lot, man. We see this kind of question
Speaker 1: with it's it's always guys. It's never girls that email this.
Speaker 1: It's guys saying her parents don't approve, but but we
Speaker 1: don't care. We're moving forward anyway. I'm kind of shocked
Speaker 1: at how many times we see that. And as a parent,
Speaker 1: I'm closer you are too. I'm closer to the parents'
Speaker 1: age on these situations because I have a ten year
Speaker 1: old and you have a eight, So we're closer to
Speaker 1: the parents age really than we are to the date ease.
Speaker 1: So it's hard for me to think to put myself
Speaker 1: in this scenario in London and I'm like, man, this guy.
Speaker 1: You cannot date this guy and guys will stay it
Speaker 1: on record. I would say that, Yeah, I would say that.
Speaker 1: I'd be the kind of dad that says now now
Speaker 1: being Bernie, would both hope to raise our kids, to
Speaker 1: instill them with enough to equip them to attract the
Speaker 1: right person anyway. Yeah, but it's still possible that they
Speaker 1: would go off the deep end, and I would say, uh,
Speaker 1: and dating that guy, yeah, I mean imagine, So what
Speaker 1: what's a scenario. He's twenty five, you're sixteen. Boom, there's
Speaker 1: enough right there. Yeah, you're not dating this guy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure. He's a convicted felon with a child molestation. Okay, Boom.
Speaker 1: I could go down the list. So let's say that
Speaker 1: did happen, not one of those scenarios, but let's say
Speaker 1: it did happen where London's dating this guy and you're
Speaker 1: like no, for whatever reason, You're like no, what could
Speaker 1: he do to change your mind? That's why I say
Speaker 1: he's to this guy to unknown here he's got to
Speaker 1: take me out. He's got to come up and he
Speaker 1: has to set something up, like, hey, I want to
Speaker 1: have coffee with you house Monday. Yeah. Now I would
Speaker 1: probably say I'm busy, yeah, but hang in there, be patient. Okay,
Speaker 1: how about it next month? And if I see a
Speaker 1: guy that it's three months, he's been asking me for
Speaker 1: coffee for three months, I'm gonna go fine, Fine, you
Speaker 1: got ten minutes, You got ten minutes. Yeah, that's where
Speaker 1: the question about where Let's just say this is you
Speaker 1: in London, where London would be in it, because if
Speaker 1: London's coming to you saying dad, mom, like I broke
Speaker 1: up with him, I know y'all don't like him, and
Speaker 1: said I'm just gonna move on this guy. Hey, buddy,
Speaker 1: we don't need to have coffee. She's moved on. But
Speaker 1: let's say that she is into him and like is
Speaker 1: trying to be respectful and y'all they broke up because whatever,
Speaker 1: that's the only way I would if she was like, dad, please, yeah, please,
Speaker 1: you need to see this guy for who he is. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And in that, the only thing that's gonna change my
Speaker 1: mind as a father of a daughter is like you
Speaker 1: said over time recognizing that man, this guy puts himself,
Speaker 1: puts or puts my daughter above himself all the time.
Speaker 1: And I can just see how he serves her, how
Speaker 1: he's gentle with her, how he's patient with her. And
Speaker 1: then you know, over time you start to see those things,
Speaker 1: and you start to see that and she has a
Speaker 1: lot of joy in him. And maybe it was the
Speaker 1: parents didn't like him, you know, for a reason that
Speaker 1: was very surface, and there was like a course, something
Speaker 1: off the bat that was like I don't think so.
Speaker 1: I mean, I can you know, my in laws are
Speaker 1: absolutely the best and they accepted me no matter what.
Speaker 1: But I was a broke, starving musician with long dreadlocks,
Speaker 1: just kind of floating around the world like there was
Speaker 1: no reason for them to say like, oh, yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: you can date our daughter. But they did, Thank goodness.
Speaker 1: But if it was something like that that was very surface,
Speaker 1: and then over time he has a chance to kind
Speaker 1: of break through that, I think he could win him
Speaker 1: over totally. I got high hopes for you, mister unknown.
Speaker 1: We'd take a break, be right back. Podcast today is
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Speaker 1: mvmt dot com slash s Granger join the movement. All right, Burns,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna kick this next question off to you. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna throw I'm gonna throw some choose your own adventure exactly.
Speaker 1: We have a Q and A all right, we have
Speaker 1: Montana bus, we have what's next not click bait, we
Speaker 1: have help, we have Bible question, we have wedding worries.
Speaker 1: I feel like Chad punted the Bible question last week,
Speaker 1: as I was, that was one you threw the hit. No,
Speaker 1: I'm not saying I want we need to say that
Speaker 1: one for Chad. He's the guy for that one because
Speaker 1: he handled some of those questions last week. Just did
Speaker 1: you listen to Chad by the way saying that for
Speaker 1: the episode one hundred, we need the all star cast? Dude,
Speaker 1: love it. Okay, that'd be so fun. Okay, I'm in
Speaker 1: that'd be so fun. Yeah, all right, do you even
Speaker 1: remember what I said? Oh, here's one that says for
Speaker 1: Bernie and Granger. Okay, I gotta do that one. Yep
Speaker 1: says hello, my name is anonymous. This person knows what's up.
Speaker 1: Let me set the scene. We're in a field with
Speaker 1: a bonfire, some cold drinks with music and other friends.
Speaker 1: So me and my wife and one and our one
Speaker 1: and a half year old went to my mother's for
Speaker 1: Mother's Day. My wife is pregnant with our second child.
Speaker 1: The whole time, my grandmother kept commenting on how big
Speaker 1: my wife's stomach, not in a good way was more like,
Speaker 1: I can't believe it's that big. My mother kept also
Speaker 1: undermining us in front of the rest of the family
Speaker 1: and giving our kid chips and sweet tea when we
Speaker 1: needed to eat. He needed to eat actual real food
Speaker 1: and drink water because he's been running outside so much.
Speaker 1: How could we be tactful to my family because I
Speaker 1: could be harsh, but they are also family. But at
Speaker 1: the same time, they do not respect us in front
Speaker 1: of the rest of our family. They undermine us as parents.
Speaker 1: The kid is also so young and he's still learning,
Speaker 1: and he doesn't need to be threatened to be whooped
Speaker 1: when he does something wrong. There's a lot to unpack
Speaker 1: her by anonymous, So let me let me threatening to
Speaker 1: whoop him too. I guess they're giving him the chips
Speaker 1: on the okay, let's say so. Okay, So his wife's pregnant, yep,
Speaker 1: number two, number two, and my grandmother kept commenting on
Speaker 1: how big my wife's stomach was, not in a good way,
Speaker 1: more like it, I can't believe it's that big. My
Speaker 1: mother kept also undermining us. So his mother and grandmother
Speaker 1: teaming up on daughter in law and grandkid. Okay, and
Speaker 1: for some reason the title is for Bernie and Granger,
Speaker 1: like they just knew that you would be the one. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm always going to defer to grace and patience with them.
Speaker 1: But also Leslie and I were talking about this the
Speaker 1: other day just and this is kind of a culture
Speaker 1: thing that we've moved to. But also, you know, Lez
Speaker 1: and I just kind of discussing amongst ourselves like why
Speaker 1: are we and people in general these days so easily offended. Well,
Speaker 1: first of all, it's the grandparents. They're gonna give chips
Speaker 1: and cookies and whatever. Don't be offended. That's what they do.
Speaker 1: And when they your kids have kids, you're gonna do that.
Speaker 1: So I take that off the plate, right, that's a
Speaker 1: grandparent being a grandparent. Let them do their thing. As
Speaker 1: far as the grandmother making comments about the belly, one,
Speaker 1: just don't be offended. Just laugh I mean we have
Speaker 1: to have like the confidence and the security to look
Speaker 1: at our own you know, bellies and whatever it is
Speaker 1: and just be like, yeah, you're right man, Yeah I
Speaker 1: can laugh with myself. Grandmother's carried a few babies in
Speaker 1: her day. Yeah, yeah, I think we're easily offended. I
Speaker 1: think I would maybe spend some time thinking about that,
Speaker 1: why these relationships are, why these things offended you so much,
Speaker 1: and then also go back to grace and patience, like, man,
Speaker 1: they love you. They're just humans. We're all just humans
Speaker 1: trying to be humans with other humans. And it's just tough. Man.
Speaker 1: That's so good man. All of that is great. I
Speaker 1: can't beat any of that. If you're having trouble with
Speaker 1: your your in laws, or if your parents are bothering
Speaker 1: your spouse, grace and patience. They raised you. They got
Speaker 1: you to this point at some level. They got you here.
Speaker 1: Listen to them. You don't have to take it to heart,
Speaker 1: and you don't have to be offended by everything. This
Speaker 1: world gets so offended, but this and that and this
Speaker 1: and that, don't be offended, especially if it's family. Now
Speaker 1: you're asking me, how could I be actful to my family?
Speaker 1: Because I could be harsh, but they're also family. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's listen to yourself. Be tactful but not harsh. I
Speaker 1: think communication is key on it on so many levels
Speaker 1: of life. Just sitting down, going, Grandma, can I can
Speaker 1: I talk to you about something? I know that you
Speaker 1: might not think it's a big deal, but when you
Speaker 1: say her belly is big in a bad way, she's pregnant,
Speaker 1: she has hormones. It's she's taking it to heart, she's
Speaker 1: making it's a little more sensitive than she's more sensitive
Speaker 1: than she would be. So would you mind just not
Speaker 1: bringing that up so much Grandma? More than likely Grandma
Speaker 1: is gonna understand. Yeah. And if she doesn't just make
Speaker 1: fun of how old she is and she can't see
Speaker 1: you know, it's like, okay, this is the dynamic of
Speaker 1: the religionship. Let's just okay. See if it goes both ways. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding, don't do that. I love it all right.
Speaker 1: If you have a question for this podcast for me
Speaker 1: and Burns or anybody else, Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: I think we're gonna do an all star cast for
Speaker 1: episode one d This is episode ninety three, so that'd
Speaker 1: be really fun. Kicking them back to you burns. Struggle
Speaker 1: for Dad. I like that grief how to get over death?
Speaker 1: I have a Q and A I have Montana Bus.
Speaker 1: Let's do the Struggle for Dad, okay, okay, and then
Speaker 1: let's do the Montana Bus after that. Okay. I know
Speaker 1: some people out there here there title and they're like,
Speaker 1: oh no, okay, Struggle for Dad. Said, Hey, Granger, my
Speaker 1: fiance and I love all the content that you put out.
Speaker 1: You have a beautiful family and you are inspiring great
Speaker 1: role models. Thank you, says We have three boys, nine
Speaker 1: three and five months old. As a father, I want
Speaker 1: nothing but the best for my boys, and I want
Speaker 1: to be the best father I could be for them.
Speaker 1: I struggle with being patient at times, and I don't
Speaker 1: like being like that. Do you ever struggle with not
Speaker 1: being patient? Do you know what the Bible verses are,
Speaker 1: stories that speak on this are thank you for being
Speaker 1: such a great model for us dads. So this is
Speaker 1: this is Jeffrey. That email could have easily been from
Speaker 1: me though, yeah, it could have been for me too. Yeah, yeah, Jeffrey,
Speaker 1: I feel your brother. How old are his kids again?
Speaker 1: They're nine three and five months? Okay, got a good
Speaker 1: spread going. That's that's that ten years spreads almost what
Speaker 1: we got going on here at the house. Yeah, first
Speaker 1: of all, you're you're right on cue Jeff, You're you've
Speaker 1: got nine to three and five months. You're going to
Speaker 1: lose your patients, and so is your wife. It's it's
Speaker 1: a test. He's asking, do you know any Bible verses
Speaker 1: or stories that speak on this. Well, a lot of
Speaker 1: Paul's letters talk about patience as being on the top
Speaker 1: of the list of his virtues. It's like love, and
Speaker 1: then patience is like almost right there. So it's something
Speaker 1: just like love. You're not just going to go out
Speaker 1: of the gate and just love everyone. It's something you cultivate,
Speaker 1: it's something it's a skill that you develop. Patience is now,
Speaker 1: God is a god of patience. So you're asking about
Speaker 1: Bible stories, well, repeatedly through the Old Testament, it's going
Speaker 1: to talk about how God is quick to forgive and
Speaker 1: slow to anger, and these unbelievable patience. And it's also
Speaker 1: known through a lot of these Bible stories that he
Speaker 1: is teaching us patients, or teaching the characters and the
Speaker 1: Bible patience, which then we in turn learn from through
Speaker 1: all kinds of scenario that he throws at us. And
Speaker 1: I think God desires us to be patient so much
Speaker 1: so that a lot of things we have to go
Speaker 1: through in life or cultivating that patience. So if what's
Speaker 1: something burns that you you consciously, I know I have
Speaker 1: a lot of examples that I could consciously say, Man,
Speaker 1: that was a season of patience for me. That was
Speaker 1: we kick and scream when we have to deal with patients,
Speaker 1: We kick and scream, and then we yeah, and then
Speaker 1: we finally stopped flailing and just succumb to it. Twenty
Speaker 1: twenty was a great example for all of us when
Speaker 1: we built this house and lived in the RV. It's
Speaker 1: a it's a big yeah. Yeah, Jeff, you're you're right
Speaker 1: on man. Yeah, You're not alone in the street, so
Speaker 1: you know, so know that. And I would suggest go
Speaker 1: dig into the Bible and find the stories because hearing
Speaker 1: them from us is one thing, But when you actually
Speaker 1: go and start to read and like read the story
Speaker 1: and read the context and find them on your own,
Speaker 1: and like spend that time alone and let God kind
Speaker 1: of speak to you on fatherhood and and your relationship
Speaker 1: to him and how you can reflect that then to
Speaker 1: your kids. I think that's when the dependency on him
Speaker 1: increases and the outflow towards your kids starts to change.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm the vineyar the branches. You know, you
Speaker 1: can do nothing apart from me. If we think about that,
Speaker 1: he who abides me will bear fruit like man, the
Speaker 1: fruits of the spirit is what he's talking about showing
Speaker 1: to his kids. Well, we have to abide in him,
Speaker 1: and so I mean that's that's the first thing that
Speaker 1: I think and I both would suggest, and that we
Speaker 1: try our absolute best is just try to be in
Speaker 1: the word and like abide in him and like what
Speaker 1: does that phrase even mean? Maybe go just like research
Speaker 1: that and think about that. Guys, I read the Bible
Speaker 1: every single morning. I know Burns does too. So it's
Speaker 1: something that we just do. It's a practice that we
Speaker 1: start and through that you learn things like patience and
Speaker 1: love and forgiveness. You learn those things through just reading it,
Speaker 1: not looking at a devotional with pinpointing a specific area
Speaker 1: of trouble. Yeah, I think this goes back to his
Speaker 1: spouse to or fiance to a little bit, which is
Speaker 1: why does he have a fiance and three kids? Maybe
Speaker 1: it's a different, different girl. It doesn't say that, but regardless,
Speaker 1: I would kick it back to her sometimes and just say, hey, babe,
Speaker 1: I'm dealing with a lot of stuff at work right now,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to knock this out before five o'clock. Can
Speaker 1: you take the boys? And at five o'clock I'm all in,
Speaker 1: But I have to concentrate on this zoom call or whatever.
Speaker 1: You know that could be these moments that's getting your patients,
Speaker 1: you know, exposed, is when you're you're trying to knock
Speaker 1: out something for work and you're on you need fifteen
Speaker 1: more minutes of the zoom call. If you'll just then
Speaker 1: I'll go throw the ball with you. You're going to
Speaker 1: be a better dad if you could delegate that to
Speaker 1: your spouse and then but then at five you better
Speaker 1: be locked on with the boys. Yeah, no, absolutely that
Speaker 1: that communication I think is key, especially when you're parenting
Speaker 1: like together and as a unit like. I think communication
Speaker 1: is key. I think boundaries and boundaries and understanding your limits.
Speaker 1: So we tend to get a lot more pressure and
Speaker 1: a lot more stressed and a lot more impatient when
Speaker 1: we have pushed our back boundaries. Right, We've pushed our limits,
Speaker 1: and so now I'm trying to do this, and but
Speaker 1: my son is asking to do this instead of having
Speaker 1: very clear boundaries, Hey, I'm actually I have margin in
Speaker 1: my life. I'm not all the way edge to edge.
Speaker 1: I haven't pushed my limits to where I'm stressed. I
Speaker 1: think in those moments, we're not as tired, we're not
Speaker 1: as irritable, and we're not as impatient. Like we have
Speaker 1: bandwidth to show that patience. And one last thing to
Speaker 1: book in this, Granger said, like reading the Word every morning.
Speaker 1: One thing that I've started to do with a group
Speaker 1: of guys is take one passage, one parable and read
Speaker 1: it and study it every morning for three weeks. Because
Speaker 1: you get up the fourth day and it's like, yep, God,
Speaker 1: I've read this before. I know this. But about the
Speaker 1: sixth day of the seventh day, you have to have patience.
Speaker 1: And it's it's definitely taught me to wait on the
Speaker 1: Lord and to be patient, because then about the fifth
Speaker 1: or sixth day, it's like, oh, I get what it's.
Speaker 1: Oh it's not that, here's what it is, but you
Speaker 1: just have to that's awesome, be patient in it. So
Speaker 1: don't just get up and like read this and kind
Speaker 1: of move on you know, coffee cup verse and then
Speaker 1: go throughout your day like be patient in the word.
Speaker 1: And I think that that is a good practice in
Speaker 1: the morning that will help show patients kind of throughout
Speaker 1: the day too. Love it. We got we got some
Speaker 1: We've got a little more time burns. We have wedding worries. Wait,
Speaker 1: we were going to uh're going to Montana bus? You
Speaker 1: said that already. Bus on ta bus says, Hey Granger,
Speaker 1: just listening to the podcast where you were recording in
Speaker 1: on the Montana bus. I'm from Missoula, Montana. Just curious
Speaker 1: how you came up with the name of that bus.
Speaker 1: Thanks Evan. So so our buses we have Montana, Freedom,
Speaker 1: and Wildflower. Now they were all three named before we
Speaker 1: got them. Apparently, as it with ships or planes, buses
Speaker 1: falling that in the category yachts, whatever, they are named
Speaker 1: when they're built. Do they get named by the people
Speaker 1: that build them or by the people that buy them?
Speaker 1: Sometimes I think it's the builder, and sometimes it's the
Speaker 1: first owner. The first owner. Yeah, so, and then apparently
Speaker 1: it's bad luck if you rename them. Butch and Bull.
Speaker 1: My drivers told me recently that we've had so much
Speaker 1: bad luck with these buses, that next one we get
Speaker 1: what we want. Sotana. I have no idea, Evan, I
Speaker 1: have no idea why she was named Montana. But it's interesting, right,
Speaker 1: It's interesting that either someone really loved that state, or
Speaker 1: that's where her first job was, or that's where the
Speaker 1: first owner was lived. And so I don't know, but
Speaker 1: I love Montana. We're gonna be there two weeks. We'll
Speaker 1: be in in Bozeman, oh Man, and then Cherry Peak,
Speaker 1: Utah the next day. I've never been to Montana. Maybe
Speaker 1: I'll like jump aboard the bus and hide in the
Speaker 1: storage shed. Part of it with you. Montana is amazing.
Speaker 1: It's so you've been, You've been a lot through Utah.
Speaker 1: And what about Idaho? No, I won't. I won't mention
Speaker 1: Idaho because it's the nation's best kept secret, so I'll
Speaker 1: keep it a secret. It's incredible. I won't say anything else.
Speaker 1: But Montana. It's like you take you take the aspects
Speaker 1: of northern Utah with the amazing mountains, but you spread
Speaker 1: it out in just these endless valleys. Montana is just endless, big,
Speaker 1: huge valleys. So you see these valleys in Colorado. Sometimes
Speaker 1: you can go through like the Breckenridge Valley, but then
Speaker 1: the Montana ones are completely unsettled. There's no humans that
Speaker 1: live there. It's crazy. It's like seeing Colorado Breckenridge in
Speaker 1: eighteen eighty. Yeah, nothing, Why has nobody moved like I
Speaker 1: think they're flocking there now there. I think just like
Speaker 1: Austin and other places. I think people are going we
Speaker 1: don't have to work in the office as song as
Speaker 1: we And with this new Skylink, this new Elon Musk Internet,
Speaker 1: you're going to be able to have high speed internet
Speaker 1: anywhere in the world. People are going to start getting
Speaker 1: houses in Montana. Yeah, unfortunately for the people that live there,
Speaker 1: fortunate for everyone else that wants to to enjoy it.
Speaker 1: But yeah, Montana's a special place. Yep. Time for one more. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we do does does anything else that I've said? We
Speaker 1: have Q and A. We have how to get over death,
Speaker 1: we have grief, we have help if I need relationship advice,
Speaker 1: Bible question left arm wedding worries, Let's do wedding worries,
Speaker 1: says Hey, my name is Mike. I'm emailing you from
Speaker 1: the Midwest, good old Indiana as a fan of not
Speaker 1: only your music but your wisdom and outlook on life.
Speaker 1: I felt like I could really trust you that I
Speaker 1: can get the right answer. On December twelfth makes us.
Speaker 1: It made my girlfriend and I sixth anniversary. It may
Speaker 1: sound like cliche, but I'm planning on popping the question.
Speaker 1: Her father and I seem to get along and I've
Speaker 1: never felt any bumps in the road, but I'm still worried.
Speaker 1: I'm a man of mixed ethnicity, mother Caucasian, father African
Speaker 1: American and working on becoming a vocalist and audio engineer
Speaker 1: as a career. She's Caucasian and a nurse. I shouldn't
Speaker 1: worry about things like this, but I'm constantly going back
Speaker 1: and forth in my mind with the pigment of my
Speaker 1: skin being an issue and career choice. As well as
Speaker 1: do all girls on their big day. She really wants
Speaker 1: to walk down the wants him to walk her down
Speaker 1: the aisle, and I ultimately would love to have one
Speaker 1: big old family with nothing but joy and happiness. Granger,
Speaker 1: Am I overthinking this? Should I be worried in today's world?
Speaker 1: And if you have any tips on popping the big question?
Speaker 1: Could you help a brother out? Thank you for all
Speaker 1: that you do. Mike man. So, first of all, December twelfth,
Speaker 1: so that's he's he's talking about twenty twenty one. So
Speaker 1: let me read that again. I felt like I could
Speaker 1: really trust you. I know you could get the right answer.
Speaker 1: On December twelfth makes my girlfriend and I's sixth anniversary.
Speaker 1: He's gonna pop the question. This email came to me yesterday,
Speaker 1: so it's fresh. Okay, does he have a name? Mike? Mike? Uh?
Speaker 1: So there's two questions, One, how do you pop the question?
Speaker 1: If we have any tips? And two should he worry
Speaker 1: about joy and happiness with concerning the pigment of his
Speaker 1: skin and hers? That's what it sounds like, is that's
Speaker 1: what the question is. So there's no uh, there's no
Speaker 1: question about the parents' acceptance. Like I thought he was worried.
Speaker 1: Father and I seem to get along okay, and I've
Speaker 1: never felt any bumps in the road. Okay, but I'm
Speaker 1: still worried he has. Mike has some some deep down
Speaker 1: issues that go way beyond this relationship or this family.
Speaker 1: In laws or potential in laws haven't given him any reason. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So that's hey, Mike, that's why we're kind of stumped
Speaker 1: right now, because it sounds it sounds great. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: may be worrying for no reason. Yeah, he says, he says.
Speaker 1: Two times, he says, one, am I were thinking this?
Speaker 1: And two he says, should I be worried? So the
Speaker 1: quick answer is no, this this sounds great. It sounds
Speaker 1: like it sounds like you're seeing You're watching a little
Speaker 1: bit too much social media, a little bit a little
Speaker 1: bit too much news. You're seeing, Uh, you're seeing what
Speaker 1: the world wants you to see. And that's not what
Speaker 1: love is. Yep, that's not what your future wife has
Speaker 1: giving you signals back with. It's not what your in
Speaker 1: laws seemed to be giving you signals back with. They're
Speaker 1: seeing love as it should be, which has no color,
Speaker 1: has no pigment of skin, we all have red blood.
Speaker 1: And I honestly think this is the product of coming
Speaker 1: out of twenty twenty and seeing what the world did
Speaker 1: to itself, which should never have gone that far. And
Speaker 1: then he's coming out of twenty twenty, he's coming out
Speaker 1: of seeing all that on the news, and he's like, man,
Speaker 1: is this whole critical race theory real? And is it
Speaker 1: inside my future in laws? And are they just putting
Speaker 1: on front And they're gonna hate me as soon as
Speaker 1: we get married. Yeah, I mean, so the answer is false,
Speaker 1: that's false. Yeah, you got Blake Bernie, you have a
Speaker 1: black daughter. Yes, what you know you've thought about this,
Speaker 1: You're the future of this. Yeah. I I want to
Speaker 1: empathize with Mike and understand. I it's it's hard. It's
Speaker 1: hard and not really in my just natural psychology nature
Speaker 1: to empathize with fear and to when it's not warranted.
Speaker 1: When and and I think that this is one of
Speaker 1: those times where I understand concern and there are certain
Speaker 1: things maybe you you do think about. But when our
Speaker 1: fear keeps us from doing the will of God, I
Speaker 1: think we're outside of our place. I think that we
Speaker 1: need community to like help us realign. And so yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, there's there's a good chance that you could
Speaker 1: and I know with my daughter Stella and with our
Speaker 1: with our family and in the comments that we've had
Speaker 1: in the past, like you could receive some nasty comments
Speaker 1: and some you know, persecution of some kind. I think
Speaker 1: that if you have this deep love, you know, like
Speaker 1: it sounds like you do and sounds like you have
Speaker 1: the support of your in laws, we're going to face
Speaker 1: those things. In our life in some capacity. I think
Speaker 1: it's just about being in the will of God when
Speaker 1: you do it. Yeah, yeah, amen. So if we're outside
Speaker 1: of that, I think it makes it tougher to endure.
Speaker 1: But if you're in the will of God and you're
Speaker 1: you're close to him and you're walking in the path
Speaker 1: that he has for you, and you're soon to be fiance,
Speaker 1: I think you can attest to this. Whatever the world
Speaker 1: throws at you, whatever life throws at you, you'll be fine. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And I want to say this too, because the second
Speaker 1: part of his question is not just about skin color.
Speaker 1: It's about career choice, because he's talking about he is
Speaker 1: a he's working on being coming a vocalist and audio
Speaker 1: engineer as a career. So you know how what we
Speaker 1: stand on that because me and you both did that.
Speaker 1: And I look back on when Amber married me in
Speaker 1: twenty ten and sometimes I ask her to this day,
Speaker 1: I'm like, why did you marry me? Because I was nobody,
Speaker 1: making no money. She was going to my shows and
Speaker 1: selling merch with me. When we were dating. No one
Speaker 1: was there. She could she looked at this, she could
Speaker 1: have easily been like, this guy is going nowhere. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he just played a show in Waco, Texas and twelve
Speaker 1: people came, and you would think that, you would think
Speaker 1: a girl could look at that and be like I
Speaker 1: got there's plenty of guys out there that are going
Speaker 1: somewhere that have a good job and that could be
Speaker 1: a father to my children. So yeah, similar story, similar
Speaker 1: story to Mike, and we could almost wrap it back
Speaker 1: up to the being content when the American idea is
Speaker 1: always to jump ship, there's something better, and like I said,
Speaker 1: with the Mexican culture doesn't seem to think that. And
Speaker 1: keep in mind, when I say Mexican culture, I'm not
Speaker 1: talking about Hispanics. I'm not talking about pigment of skin,
Speaker 1: because once they become American, they want to do the
Speaker 1: same thing. This is an American thing, not by heritage,
Speaker 1: but by your origin. Because if you're from Mexico, you
Speaker 1: think there seems to be a higher level of contentment.
Speaker 1: But when you're a Mexican American, you have the same
Speaker 1: want a jump ship and be there's something greater for me,
Speaker 1: and that's what built this country. It's amazing, but it
Speaker 1: also hurts people like Mike who's like, man, I always
Speaker 1: want to be an audio engineer, but I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's going to be enough money for this family.
Speaker 1: But didn't think like that sixty years ago. They're like,
Speaker 1: this is what I do. I work at the bread factory.
Speaker 1: That's what I do. And the main thing I want
Speaker 1: to look at here is you asked I want a
Speaker 1: big old family with nothing but joy and happiness. Nothing
Speaker 1: you've said in your email should affect that, right, career,
Speaker 1: pigment of skin, nothing, in laws, in laws, nothing should
Speaker 1: stop you from having a big old family with joy
Speaker 1: and happiness. Mike, you go get it, man. Yeah, this
Speaker 1: is for you. Yeah, absolutely, man, this is for you
Speaker 1: and me and Burns are going to be thinking about
Speaker 1: you on December twelfth, and he asked ways to propose. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think you do it at a Granger Smith show.
Speaker 1: Y'all have done that before, right, come on, Mike, Yes, Hey, Mike,
Speaker 1: email me back, or you do it on the podcast
Speaker 1: special guest Mike, Oh, girlfriends here, that would be so awkward. Hey,
Speaker 1: by email me back if you want to get if
Speaker 1: you want to propose it one of my shows. But
Speaker 1: I don't know if we're playing December twelfth. I can't
Speaker 1: can't even look it up. But twelve twelve. Regardless, Buddy,
Speaker 1: twelve twelve, twenty one, I'll be thinking about you the
Speaker 1: day of the proposal. I appreciate you, buddy. I appreciate
Speaker 1: you writing in. Get rid of that fear, Go get
Speaker 1: your big joy and happiness and big old family. Yep
Speaker 1: burns read of time. But I appreciate you dropping up here.
Speaker 1: It's been awesome, man. Yeah, appreciate you, dude. See you guys.
Speaker 1: Thanks for joining me on the Granger Smith Podcast. I
Speaker 1: appreciate all of you. Guys. You could help me out
Speaker 1: by rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube,
Speaker 1: subscribe to this channel, hit that little like button and
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Speaker 1: a video. If you have a question for me that
Speaker 1: you would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. Yi