Speaker 1: All right, break it down. If you ever have feelings
Speaker 1: that you just won'ts ay and Cat got your cob
Speaker 1: and like an m brother, ladies and bolts, do you
Speaker 1: just follow Anna spirit where it's all the front and
Speaker 1: real stuff to the chill stuff and.
Speaker 2: You but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can do
Speaker 2: it just.
Speaker 1: Stop you feel things. This is feeling things with Amy
Speaker 1: and Cat.
Speaker 3: Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy and I'm
Speaker 3: Cat and my feeling of the day is thrilled.
Speaker 2: What are you thrilled about?
Speaker 3: Well, I'm thrilled that my laundry room is starting to
Speaker 3: feel like a hum You know. I painted it, which
Speaker 3: was step one, so phase one paint, which don't underestimate
Speaker 3: the power of paint.
Speaker 2: Because sometimes, yeah change, you just.
Speaker 3: Might need to freshen something up, just a fresh coat
Speaker 3: of paint. And also tho magic eraser. I don't know
Speaker 3: how the mister Clean magic eraser works. I can tell you, okay,
Speaker 3: tell me you know the science behind it. How does
Speaker 3: it work?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 4: Because I thought it was insane, because it really does
Speaker 4: erace stuff. I'm pretty sure it's like a little bit
Speaker 4: of a sander and it just sands the bit of
Speaker 4: mess off a very gentle sander.
Speaker 3: Sure, it's a very gentle sander with some heavy chemicals.
Speaker 2: Oh you think there's chemicals?
Speaker 3: I think so.
Speaker 2: I thought it was like a sanding sponge.
Speaker 3: Well, let's look it up. Okay, I feel like anything,
Speaker 3: mister clean chemical.
Speaker 4: Somebody told me it was a sander, and I believe them.
Speaker 4: I didn't fact check it.
Speaker 3: It doesn't feel like a sand like. I have a
Speaker 3: lot of the different like I've the thin ones and
Speaker 3: the thick sponges, and then I don't know that i'd
Speaker 3: put it in sand paper category.
Speaker 2: Gentle sandpaper?
Speaker 3: Sure, is that any sponge? There's definitely something in it
Speaker 3: that makes it. Well. My point is, so my laundry
Speaker 3: room goes out to my garage, and the door that
Speaker 3: goes to the garage is a different type of door
Speaker 3: than all the doors in the rest of my house.
Speaker 3: It's like a more commercial type door, like a metal
Speaker 3: ish like. It's not like a wooden door you would
Speaker 3: just paint. And it didn't really need to be painted.
Speaker 3: But it was very, very dirty. So I took a
Speaker 3: little magic eraser to it, and oh my gosh, am
Speaker 3: I right, sorry, Sorry, Shannon just looked up what magic
Speaker 3: eraser is, and it literally says magic eraser works like
Speaker 3: a super fine sandpaper because of the melamine foam, a
Speaker 3: material with a hard, poorus structure that acts as a
Speaker 3: micro abrasive when you wet it. The foam's microplastic fibers
Speaker 3: lift and trap dirt and grime, essentially exfoliating the stain
Speaker 3: from the surface with physical friction rather than dissolving it.
Speaker 3: It's crucial to test the eraser on a hidden spot first.
Speaker 2: You're right, You're right, gentle sandpaper.
Speaker 3: It is super fine. It's a micro abrasive.
Speaker 2: Okay, I should have been more confident.
Speaker 3: You should haven't. I should have trusted you. I just
Speaker 3: thought it was more like a sponge. But I guess
Speaker 3: it is a sponge. This it's a gentle sandpapering sponge,
Speaker 3: super fine sandpaper sponge thing.
Speaker 2: So now you can feel really good about using it
Speaker 2: in your home.
Speaker 3: I know, I said, out of the gate, I don't
Speaker 3: know how it works, and then you said I do,
Speaker 3: and then I said tell us, and then you told us,
Speaker 3: and I doubted you. So I am sorry. I'm really sorry.
Speaker 4: To be fair, there's no reason that you should trust
Speaker 4: me on that.
Speaker 3: Can you see if there's chemicals in there though, because
Speaker 3: I'm always scared to touch it with my bare hand. Yeah. Wait,
Speaker 3: because well she'll look it up and we can continued. No,
Speaker 3: I think you can just wear a glove.
Speaker 4: Melamine foam is the maining green. It contains a chemical
Speaker 4: called Oh no, I think it's just what they put
Speaker 4: the dead cats in when we had a dix formaldehyde.
Speaker 3: Wait does that want it happened? Hold on?
Speaker 4: Hold on? Yeah.
Speaker 3: Malamine foam is the main ingredient in a magic eraser,
Speaker 3: and it contains a chemical called formaldehyde and melamine sodium
Speaker 3: bustle fight copolymer.
Speaker 2: Maybe you shouldn't feel good about you.
Speaker 3: So you're right and I'm right. We're both right. It's
Speaker 3: a super fine sandpaper chemicals.
Speaker 2: They preserve dead bodies with.
Speaker 3: I will use it, but I keep gloves, you know,
Speaker 3: the gloves that I made our protein balls with. I
Speaker 3: have a whole box full. There's like five hundred latex
Speaker 3: powderless gloves in there or something.
Speaker 2: I just feel like I went through a roller coaster.
Speaker 4: I was right, then I was not sure, then I
Speaker 4: was right again, and then I was wrong.
Speaker 3: I mean, this is like a metaphor for life. Feels
Speaker 3: sometimes a roller coaster. You never know, you're just bobbing
Speaker 3: and weaving.
Speaker 2: Life is much like a magic eraser.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and trying to figure out what the heck it
Speaker 3: is and if it's safe. And I love magic eraser,
Speaker 3: and there's chemicals and lots of things that we use.
Speaker 3: I just try to, you know, practice safety when using it.
Speaker 3: So I put on my rubber gloves.
Speaker 2: I just have been grabbing it.
Speaker 3: Wash your hands, but who knows. Oop, Sorry, that was
Speaker 3: my computer. I think that like you also, like we
Speaker 3: have to sometimes absorb or consume an enormous amount of
Speaker 3: certain chemicals for them to be I'd have body yeah,
Speaker 3: like it's not like you're bathing or something like I
Speaker 3: exfoliate my legs with it. And maybe that's me justifying
Speaker 3: like diet coke, because I love diet coke and some
Speaker 3: people are, oh, that's so bad, like you can't have
Speaker 3: diet coke, and I'm like, okay, some of the research
Speaker 3: that you read it shows that, yes, some of what
Speaker 3: they use to produce that is harmful, but that's if
Speaker 3: you're drinking five hundred.
Speaker 2: I'm yeah, my husband drinks like three of them a day.
Speaker 3: Though hyperbole with my numbers here, because I'm obviously not
Speaker 3: sitting scientific fact right now. I'm just saying that sometimes
Speaker 3: we have to do some critical thinking and be like, Okay,
Speaker 3: I can take this research, and then I can also
Speaker 3: take this research and know that a diet coke here
Speaker 3: and there is not going to harm me because I
Speaker 3: love I love diet coke and I don't want to
Speaker 3: ever give it up. And maybe this is me just
Speaker 3: justifying it for myself. Also, if they're doing it on
Speaker 3: a rat, it's way smaller than me, so it's tiny, tiny, tiny,
Speaker 3: So I would have to have a lot of diet
Speaker 3: coke for it to be harmful, and you would have
Speaker 3: to exfoliate your whole body with a magic erase.
Speaker 4: Every day every day for it to be Have you
Speaker 4: seen that people diet coke fridge cigarettes, which I think
Speaker 4: at first was like supposed to be cute, And now
Speaker 4: that you're talking, I'm like, I don't like the comparison.
Speaker 3: No, I think it's very different, but they can't be addictive.
Speaker 4: They like make sure it's on TikTok that say fridge
Speaker 4: cigarette and has like a diet coke, And that's why
Speaker 4: I think they thought it was like a cute name.
Speaker 4: But I'm like, I don't think that I want the
Speaker 4: drink that I prefer to be compared to a cigarette.
Speaker 3: What if one day we find out that it is.
Speaker 4: I'll be really happy because I would have let myself
Speaker 4: drink all those diet cokes.
Speaker 2: So I've loved a full, nice life.
Speaker 3: Anyway, we're not They were thrilled.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not thrilled anymore. So can you bring us
Speaker 2: back to this three?
Speaker 3: Our feeling is not fear, it is thrilled. I am
Speaker 3: thrilled that the magic eraser took all the grime off
Speaker 3: my garage, the door that was white. The door, well,
Speaker 3: it's just fun that it's clean now, like looking at yes,
Speaker 3: it's satisfying to have it clean or organized. The cabinets kept,
Speaker 3: the cabinets painted them, just changed the hardware. Ordered cheap
Speaker 3: o antique brass hardware off of Amazon and new Hinges,
Speaker 3: which total game changer because I at one point when
Speaker 3: I bought the house, I was thinking, oh, we might
Speaker 3: just need to rip these cabinets out because they're old
Speaker 3: and put new ones in eventually. And now I'm like, hey,
Speaker 3: don't underestimate the power of paint. And some new hardware
Speaker 3: because it's changed the game. Let's see, I like to
Speaker 3: get up and go look at your launch it. So yeah,
Speaker 3: I must have been extra dopamine filled or something. I
Speaker 3: don't know what neurotransmitter got me to do this, because
Speaker 3: it's not my normal behavior. I mean, maybe if I
Speaker 3: was on adderall I would do something like this, but
Speaker 3: I'm I'm not. But I took my detergent out of
Speaker 3: the thing it came in because I used the little
Speaker 3: pods and I put it in a cute glass charm.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, what TikTok?
Speaker 3: Did you watch nothing? That meat my brain My sister's
Speaker 3: laundroom kind of looks like that, Which.
Speaker 2: Is does it make you happy? Cute?
Speaker 3: It made me happy in the moment, I was like, well,
Speaker 3: this is not that hard. I don't have to live
Speaker 3: this way, like no one's gonna see in the cabinet
Speaker 3: and I'm not trying to show it off to anybody.
Speaker 3: But I didn't go out and buy the glass container.
Speaker 3: It's left over for my pantry and it wasn't being used. Okay,
Speaker 3: so there's that if that makes you feel any better.
Speaker 3: But even if I had gone out and bought it,
Speaker 3: that's fine.
Speaker 2: That's okay.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And then I ordered new wool dryer balls that
Speaker 3: look like bumblebees.
Speaker 2: How many did you get?
Speaker 3: Six?
Speaker 2: Are you gonna put them all in at the same time?
Speaker 3: Yeah? They're extra large organic bumble bees. And they're so cute.
Speaker 3: And you know they have all kinds of animals. They
Speaker 3: have sheep, they have cow, they have hearts, they have ladybugs.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to get all the animals eventually, but
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to get more glass jars because you know,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna store my wool balls in the glass jars
Speaker 3: to match the detergent.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you have to, okay.
Speaker 3: So I'm thrilled about that, even though it's not normally
Speaker 3: my personality. And I hung pictures in your laundry room
Speaker 3: in my launder room, which is also think about it.
Speaker 3: I walk out to the garage, I walk out that door,
Speaker 3: I walk in that door. It should be happy. And
Speaker 3: also I have told you, or hopefully at least tried
Speaker 3: to convince you, that I love laundry, So why not
Speaker 3: make the space happy. I put in a new sink.
Speaker 3: I ordered a sink off Wayfair, this fairly inexpensive. And
Speaker 3: I ordered a new light off Amazon, so bam, bam bam.
Speaker 3: I mean, obviously I had to hire somebody to do
Speaker 3: put the sink and the light for the electrical but
Speaker 3: I mean, not that much to upgrade this space. And
Speaker 3: I'm thrilled about it. I am just that's the word.
Speaker 2: I'm just over.
Speaker 3: I'm just over the moon thrilled about it. Because the
Speaker 3: picture frames I've had sitting in a closet since I
Speaker 3: moved here last year into my new house, Like I
Speaker 3: took them down from the other house, hadn't done anything
Speaker 3: with and I had photos of me and the kids
Speaker 3: from the last couple of years or show. Just went
Speaker 3: through my phone and found some of us, printed them out,
Speaker 3: put them in there, hung up the frames. Made what
Speaker 3: I have one of those frames where you can like
Speaker 3: take the little letters and write whatever you want. Those boards,
Speaker 3: what are those called?
Speaker 2: Like a felt board?
Speaker 3: I felt?
Speaker 2: Yeah, what are those called? Why can't I think of
Speaker 2: the word a letterboard? A letter board?
Speaker 3: A felt letterboard?
Speaker 2: That yeah, okay?
Speaker 3: And I sat down.
Speaker 2: What in the.
Speaker 3: World the kind of drugs was on? I don't know.
Speaker 3: I wasn't even on a diked. No, I didn't.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: Maybe I just had time and the kids weren't around.
Speaker 3: So I sat down with the letters and put on
Speaker 3: Real Housewives of something or another, and I just started
Speaker 3: playing around with stuff. At the top, I put have
Speaker 3: the day you need to have cue right, Then I
Speaker 3: put be curious.
Speaker 2: And then you should write I already did it. Oh okay.
Speaker 3: So I'm trying to think of the there's four things
Speaker 3: on there. I'm trying to think of what I put
Speaker 3: for the third thing? Okay, how did I need to
Speaker 3: have be curious? Oh? No, you're worth I'm hoping my
Speaker 3: kids will look at this when they're walking out the door.
Speaker 3: The fourth thing is check the calendar. And I have
Speaker 3: that hanging right above my skylight calendar. I had my
Speaker 3: skylight calendar in my kitchen, but I have moved it
Speaker 3: to the laundroom and mounted it on the wall.
Speaker 4: You mounted it, no, oh, Nember had a handyman, got it,
Speaker 4: got it, got it, got it.
Speaker 3: But I had the idea to move off my counter
Speaker 3: and mount it on the wall. But I mean I
Speaker 3: could have, but since he was already here, we had
Speaker 3: to do it.
Speaker 2: Are these the same men that came over and you
Speaker 2: had the food in your teeth?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: Okay? Because I wanted to update if they acted weird
Speaker 2: or anything.
Speaker 3: No, this is just one guy.
Speaker 2: Okay, you didn't have I do have.
Speaker 3: A story about this guy, but I can't say it
Speaker 3: right now.
Speaker 2: We'll tell it.
Speaker 3: No, I'll tell you about it later. So the handyman
Speaker 3: hung the skylight shout out, but the calendar is there,
Speaker 3: so I hung the felt board above it. So it's like,
Speaker 3: you know, how did you need to be curious? Know
Speaker 3: you're worth check the calendar? So the kids know because
Speaker 3: they're scheduled schools back in session. Do they have truck practice?
Speaker 3: Do they have tutoring? When are they going to their dads?
Speaker 3: When we need to start laundry to go to their
Speaker 3: dads And it's in the laundry room all the things.
Speaker 3: So it's so it's just it just feels like a home.
Speaker 3: Now my laundry this also this this this my dyson.
Speaker 3: They did back them out, hung them out.
Speaker 2: Stop.
Speaker 3: I've never done that.
Speaker 2: Before three years. I haven't hung my vacuum mount.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well you want my you want my handyman to come.
Speaker 2: Over, I'm gonna have my dad. We'll see.
Speaker 3: Will you have a dad?
Speaker 2: I don't, Well, my dad would come home your Yeah,
Speaker 2: he would it's fine. He's halfway retired kind of.
Speaker 4: Or he doesn't work Mondays and Fridays, so if you
Speaker 4: need something on Monday or Friday, he would probably love
Speaker 4: to come do it. Okay, Remember when he tried to
Speaker 4: fix your outlets and he couldn't.
Speaker 3: Yes, I will take him up on that, or take
Speaker 3: you up on hitting him up, because I think you're right.
Speaker 3: I think he would love that. And anytime he has
Speaker 3: come over and helped us with podcast room stuff, it
Speaker 3: is so reminded me of my dad because I know
Speaker 3: if my dad were here, which I was sort of
Speaker 3: making a joke earlier, like, well, you have a dad
Speaker 3: and I don't. If you're new, my dad has passed away,
Speaker 3: and we can stay light about it, stay fun. I
Speaker 3: can be sad and also make jokes about how my
Speaker 3: dad's not here. But he was the type of dad
Speaker 3: that was very, very very handy and absolutely would have
Speaker 3: done that. And is Alex handy he is. He changed
Speaker 3: something on his toilet the other day and he made
Speaker 3: his boys come in. He's like, come here, y'all need
Speaker 3: to learn how to do this, because this is a
Speaker 3: simple thing that's gonna, you know, save you two hundred bucks.
Speaker 3: You don't have to call a plumber.
Speaker 2: Could he have hung your vacuum ount?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 2: What's his level of handy? Can he change a sink?
Speaker 3: I don't have to ask about the sink thing.
Speaker 2: But could your dad change a sink? You think?
Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, night, I could do might I could build
Speaker 3: a house? Okay, yeah, just like your dad?
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, my dad doesn't actually do the building of
Speaker 4: a house, but I guess, but I bet you could.
Speaker 2: He did. I think in college his job was construction,
Speaker 2: like building houses.
Speaker 3: Now my dad could build, like he made all kinds
Speaker 3: of like his house, like the house he was in
Speaker 3: when I was in high school. I remember a lot
Speaker 3: of his furniture he made, like his night stands and
Speaker 3: his headboard. And I don't know. I don't know how
Speaker 3: I thought at that he had the time.
Speaker 4: We can't, well, I shouldn't say that we can't. I
Speaker 4: don't think because I've always thought like, that'd be so
Speaker 4: cool if I was handy, Because I have a friend
Speaker 4: that like just will go to Low's, buy stuff, get
Speaker 4: it cut there, and build it. She built a mantle
Speaker 4: for her apartment to have during Christmas, to like hang
Speaker 4: stuff on a mantle. That crazy, I wish I could
Speaker 4: do that kind of stuff, but I think that my
Speaker 4: attention spanned the detail isn't there. I'd be like, Oh,
Speaker 4: it doesn't have to be exactly correct, and then like
Speaker 4: it'd be crooked or like I'd be like, I'll just
Speaker 4: glue it together instead of nail it, and then it'll
Speaker 4: fall apart.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not gonna work if you're so.
Speaker 4: Our types of brains. I just think that, yeah, we're
Speaker 4: better if we hire people or a call.
Speaker 3: I know. That's why I'm like, what's you know what?
Speaker 4: I do?
Speaker 3: Have a neurofeedback appointment. I'm going to ask her about that.
Speaker 3: I'd be like, what'd you do? I had neurofeedback maybe
Speaker 3: on this was Thursday or Friday that I did all
Speaker 3: That's that I had the appointment, And I think on
Speaker 3: a Saturday that I did all that stuff. So I'm
Speaker 3: gonna ask her what she did, because I'm telling that whatever, yeah,
Speaker 3: brain cocktail that was, that has to be it, because
Speaker 3: I've been sitting here perplexed, like what the heck. I've
Speaker 3: had those felt boards forever and I wrote four things
Speaker 3: on it. I sat down and wrote those four things.
Speaker 3: I put my detergent in a jar something.
Speaker 2: Okay, but here's the test though, something. Will you continue
Speaker 2: to pour your det in the jar?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 3: Because it's there, and then when I buy it and
Speaker 3: I'll replenish it.
Speaker 4: Then I feel like when I move, I'm going to
Speaker 4: be really motivated for like a week to get stuff done,
Speaker 4: and then I'm gonna be like, yeah, So.
Speaker 3: I think you're gonna be so excited though, like you'll
Speaker 3: have that adrenaline going I think for like a week
Speaker 3: or I think it's gonna last longer than a week.
Speaker 4: You might have to come and do my laundy room
Speaker 4: because I was thinking the launder room was the one
Speaker 4: room I wouldn't have to do anything.
Speaker 3: But you want me to come to your laundry room
Speaker 3: because now I'm an experienced laundroom designer.
Speaker 4: Yes, okay, I would like to hand off my laundr
Speaker 4: room to you. Oh my gosh, that will be a fun.
Speaker 3: What's my budget?
Speaker 2: So I just like you can use stuff that I
Speaker 2: already own.
Speaker 3: It's like I get one hundred dollars in a magic
Speaker 3: erasorry get to work.
Speaker 2: Okay, one hundred dollars not counting paint. How about that?
Speaker 2: It'll be free.
Speaker 3: I have to paint it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course.
Speaker 4: Okay, you like to paint, now you can use It'll
Speaker 4: be like a scavenger hunt. I'm like, okay, there's all
Speaker 4: these boxes all over my house. You can open whatever
Speaker 4: box you want, go through it, grab whatever you want,
Speaker 4: and use that to decorate the laundry room.
Speaker 2: You have no idea what you will find. Oh my gosh,
Speaker 2: it's so fun. Thank you for doing this.
Speaker 3: You're welcome. You sound like a mom to her kids,
Speaker 3: like trying to convince them to do something like, oh
Speaker 3: my gosh, this is gonna be so fun. It's like
Speaker 3: a game. I'm going to count to ten.
Speaker 2: I'll time you.
Speaker 3: Yes, I'll time And my mom would do that all
Speaker 3: the time. I would never get ready for bed. I
Speaker 3: would never want to hear I'll time you. I bet
Speaker 3: you can't do it in less than two minutes. And
Speaker 3: I'll be like, oh, yes I can.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I bet you can't do my laundry
Speaker 2: room in less than a week.
Speaker 4: True.
Speaker 3: True, because I saw how long it took me. Because
Speaker 3: obviously I did all those little things on that one
Speaker 3: Saturday that's most recent, but building up to that, it
Speaker 3: definitely took cool a few weeks.
Speaker 2: Thank you, yeah, so that's why I would like you
Speaker 2: to do it, and then the one cool room in
Speaker 2: my house will be.
Speaker 3: Your washer room. Yeah. Do I have a budget for
Speaker 3: some wool balls, like cute ones like ladybugs?
Speaker 2: The budget?
Speaker 3: Sorry, I'll gift some two housewarming gift.
Speaker 4: Listen, anything for the laundry, like detergent or like wool
Speaker 4: balls or whatever, not part of the budget. The one
Speaker 4: hundred dollars is just for like design features.
Speaker 3: Okay, there's no new hardware.
Speaker 4: There's cabinets. My laundry room is just a room. I
Speaker 4: just bought a washer and dryer. Those will be in there,
Speaker 4: and then I have like a wire shelf.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: So I don't know if I don't know if she's
Speaker 4: gonna cut it, but I think you could really make
Speaker 4: something of it.
Speaker 3: I think we could find some cute baskets. You're gonna
Speaker 3: need to put some baskets.
Speaker 2: I already have cute baskets.
Speaker 3: Can we like put like a wood foux covering over
Speaker 3: the wire? Yes?
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I saw that on TikTok Okay. Yeah, yes,
Speaker 2: if you can get a good deal.
Speaker 3: Okay, I saw that somewhere too. I guess it was
Speaker 3: probably sick shak and that's why it's in my mind.
Speaker 3: But it is. It's fascinating because it's just kind of
Speaker 3: like slides over like a lot of people do it
Speaker 3: in their pantries, and it just slides right close and
Speaker 3: it just elevates it.
Speaker 4: Shannon just said that I'm scamming you to unpack for you,
Speaker 4: and you fell for it. Shannon just said that I'm
Speaker 4: scamming you to unpack for you, and you.
Speaker 3: Fell for it. You're like, just go around to every
Speaker 3: box and open it up and pull everything out and
Speaker 3: put it away, and I'm sure you'll find things that laundy.
Speaker 2: Is working out over me?
Speaker 3: Can I can I hire your dad as my assistant?
Speaker 3: Or not hire, but like maybe my can he be
Speaker 3: my laundry room assistant?
Speaker 2: My dad?
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I'm going to need it. Yes, an assistant
Speaker 3: to be like, hey.
Speaker 2: Yes he can make the shelving Okay, oh my gosh. Okay.
Speaker 4: Here's the great dad hack is when you ask your
Speaker 4: dad to help you make something and he has to
Speaker 4: go to Low's to get the supplies. A lot of
Speaker 4: times he doesn't make you pay for the supplies, so
Speaker 4: that would help your budget. You can just be like, hey,
Speaker 4: Cat's dad, Can you grab some of these two by
Speaker 4: fours on your way over?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 3: This is reminded me of the voice smell that we're
Speaker 3: going to play today from a listener ok that has
Speaker 3: resentment from people to expect our names from their dead.
Speaker 4: I'm not expecting to ask him. He says, what he
Speaker 4: likes about me is I always offer to pay. I
Speaker 4: think he just appreciates people offering. And sometimes when my
Speaker 4: parents and men, Mommy, I vemo them back their money.
Speaker 3: That's true. I can vouch for you on that and
Speaker 3: your parents because you're moving and there's a lot going
Speaker 3: on in life right now, and like they were offering
Speaker 3: to pay for something for you, and I was thinking,
Speaker 3: in my mind, are you crazy say yes to that?
Speaker 3: And you were like I told him no, And I'm like,
Speaker 3: what the.
Speaker 2: Maybe?
Speaker 3: Because if it's two again, both my parents are not
Speaker 3: alive and and so there's no fun surprises like that anymore. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And I grew up with that, and you obviously grew
Speaker 3: up with some of that, and that the voicemail we're
Speaker 3: going to play is someone that didn't grow up with
Speaker 3: anything like that. And Kat and I got into this
Speaker 3: whole discussion after we listen to the voicemail about money
Speaker 3: and how it's so relative.
Speaker 2: And we both had to say SIV after because we both.
Speaker 3: Got a little like feisty and snappy, and if you're
Speaker 3: new here, SIB means sorry, I bitchy.
Speaker 2: But also I will say that what I've had to learn.
Speaker 4: And my mom made a comment to me the other
Speaker 4: day when I was like, please don't do that, when
Speaker 4: she was offering to do something for me, she said,
Speaker 4: sometimes I just want to do things for my kids,
Speaker 4: And so I had to be reminded like, Okay, yes,
Speaker 4: I don't want to be expectant of things or I
Speaker 4: don't want to take from them and not then give.
Speaker 2: But also her love language is gifts. She likes doing
Speaker 2: that stuff for people.
Speaker 3: If you don't take that away from it, yes, you
Speaker 3: were robbing her of the opportunity to spread joy. Yeah,
Speaker 3: which just selfish. Yeah, so you should accept that other.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 3: Before we do get to the voicemail, which it's probably
Speaker 3: one of the most authentic, vulnerable voicemails we've received. It's
Speaker 3: very sweet and I appreciate her honesty, but she's definitely
Speaker 3: struggling with a certain feeling and the feeling the feeling
Speaker 3: is resentment. I'll just go ahead and say that it's
Speaker 3: probably obvious by the way we're talking about it. There's
Speaker 3: resentment around money at times, so we're gonna play that.
Speaker 3: And I think even if you don't relate to exactly
Speaker 3: what she's saying, I want you to hear the voicemail
Speaker 3: so that you can be challenged. At least I was,
Speaker 3: and I hope others are too, to examine your feelings
Speaker 3: the way she's examining hers. And that's our hope for
Speaker 3: this podcast, right is that we all have feelings and
Speaker 3: we're trying to figure them out. And this voicemail is
Speaker 3: such a beautiful example of really tapping into the awareness
Speaker 3: of a feeling, like I don't think she really knows
Speaker 3: what to do with it quite yet, but she knows
Speaker 3: it's there and she wants to figure out Yeah, and
Speaker 3: she's owning it. She's not running from it, and you
Speaker 3: can hear the emotion in her voice. It's just tender,
Speaker 3: and that I think will be the main main takeaway
Speaker 3: for every single person. Even if you can't relate to
Speaker 3: the topic, let the takeaway be wow, I want to
Speaker 3: be in tune with other feelings. Maybe I don't have
Speaker 3: that exact one of resentment, but I might have XYZ,
Speaker 3: and I want to be honest like that about it
Speaker 3: and explore what's going on. So before we get to
Speaker 3: the voicemail, though, I gave my feeling today, which was thrilled,
Speaker 3: and I know you have a feeling of the day,
Speaker 3: So what is yours?
Speaker 4: Kat? My feelings have changed a little bit through this
Speaker 4: conversation really because I was a little bit annoyed earlier.
Speaker 3: Oh because Sib.
Speaker 4: No, Well, I think that's maybe why I was SIB,
Speaker 4: because I just have been feeling annoyed and frustrated today.
Speaker 2: But I think my feeling is intrigued.
Speaker 3: While you went from annoyed to intrigued, which you can
Speaker 3: be annoyed and intrigued at the same time.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so I don't feel that presently I did fifteen
Speaker 4: minutes ago.
Speaker 3: You were annoyed and now, wow, wow.
Speaker 2: Exact bro. I think I'm just like, well, it's just cool.
Speaker 3: I think it's great. Look what our podcast can do.
Speaker 4: Okay, but I'm intrigued because this morning I got my
Speaker 4: genetic blood test. They don't just like give you the
Speaker 4: results when you do that, they make you do like
Speaker 4: a counseling call. It was really interesting because it wasn't
Speaker 4: like therapeutic. I think they just don't want you to
Speaker 4: get these results without being able to really understand what
Speaker 4: they are because it can freak people out. I'm just
Speaker 4: seeing what mutations that I carry, and it's normal to
Speaker 4: have the mutations. We all have them, except I had
Speaker 4: four and Patrick who had one, and I.
Speaker 2: Felt like I lost. I thought he was gonna have
Speaker 2: like mayby seven or something like that, but he had won, and.
Speaker 3: Oh no, I want to know mine.
Speaker 2: So it is really interesting.
Speaker 4: It's really expensive though, so if you don't have a
Speaker 4: reason to do it, and well, depending on if your
Speaker 4: insurance covers it, our stident. So I sign up for
Speaker 4: a survey, so I got a discount anyway, we had this.
Speaker 3: Well that's good to know that if you do a
Speaker 3: survey you can get a discount.
Speaker 4: Well, I don't know if that's offered. I don't know
Speaker 4: if it's just where we went they offered that. So
Speaker 4: I don't want anybody like, what's the discount. I don't
Speaker 4: I don't know. It could have just been from the
Speaker 4: clinic AnyWho. We're doing this testing and basically all she's
Speaker 4: saying is like, these are the mutations that you have.
Speaker 2: This is what you carry.
Speaker 4: So if me and Patrick had the same mutation, that
Speaker 4: would not be great because then we could pass that
Speaker 4: to our kid. But they're recessive, so like, if I
Speaker 4: have it, the chances of our kid having it isn't.
Speaker 2: Super super likely.
Speaker 4: However, she's going through these, I forget the names of them,
Speaker 4: and I don't have the like PaperWorks, so I can't
Speaker 4: say what they are. She gets to the third one
Speaker 4: and she's like, oh, and then you have this one.
Speaker 4: She says the name, it's like a long scientific name
Speaker 4: for alder.
Speaker 3: Hyde, magic eraser.
Speaker 2: And she goes, and do you guys know who Helen
Speaker 2: Keller is?
Speaker 4: And I go, we go, yeah, she goes, this is
Speaker 4: what they think Helen Keller had, So that's pretty cool.
Speaker 2: I did not to say so I think I was like,
Speaker 2: that's so neat.
Speaker 3: You're blind dead, she goes.
Speaker 2: She goes, she was blind and deaf, but she was
Speaker 2: able to communicate, so that's really exciting. She has mute, she.
Speaker 4: Was able to communicate in other ways because her brain
Speaker 4: was still there, Like she had a functioning brain and
Speaker 4: she was able to like think, I.
Speaker 3: Know, speaking of TikTok. There's all kinds of conspiracies about
Speaker 3: how like if Helen Keller is as inspiring as we Oh,
Speaker 3: really no, I mean I'm sure she's inspiring. Is just like,
Speaker 3: come on, was she really able to?
Speaker 2: Did she write a book?
Speaker 3: I'm only laughing because of the tiktoks I've seen. I
Speaker 3: don't know.
Speaker 4: I don't know, Okay, to be fair, I don't know
Speaker 4: a lot about her, but now I feel like I
Speaker 4: should look into it.
Speaker 2: You guess it's only a one in thirteen thousand chances.
Speaker 2: So she was like, so it's not like a lot.
Speaker 3: I mean that sounds high to me, Like what in
Speaker 3: a million? Seems like well, actually one day.
Speaker 4: So the two other ones were one in two hundred.
Speaker 4: I'm just thinking some other things that she said that
Speaker 4: cracked me up. I have this other mutation that it's
Speaker 4: night blindness. Then I think it turns into like blindness
Speaker 4: you have that. I just have bad eyesight, but I
Speaker 4: don't have this disorder. But she goes Actually my sister's
Speaker 4: babysitter growing up, when she used to run into walls
Speaker 4: and they thought she was.
Speaker 2: Just clumsy, but turns out she was going blind.
Speaker 4: Do you have all these like antidotes from all these stories,
Speaker 4: but that could be my kid. But that one I
Speaker 4: only have a one in two hundred thousand chance. So
Speaker 4: she said, there never can be a zero chance of anything,
Speaker 4: but one in two hundred thousand is basically zero, so
Speaker 4: it doesn't need like one in a million. So one
Speaker 4: in thirteen thousand is pretty unlikely. Okay, I'm not worried
Speaker 4: about it. And then my other one was a lot
Speaker 4: more likely, and that's one in eight hundred. But it
Speaker 4: was like an iron deficiency thing that I think people
Speaker 4: live pretty healthy lives with.
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure I have an iron deficiency.
Speaker 2: It was a certain kind.
Speaker 4: Well, actually it was interesting because she said it was
Speaker 4: something that most people don't realize they have until they
Speaker 4: go through menopause.
Speaker 2: I don't know why.
Speaker 3: That's when it starts. That's when they start to I
Speaker 3: guess it's like asymptomatic until then.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so like you live a pretty normal life. And
Speaker 4: the blindness one, the night blindness, she said, you go
Speaker 4: blind in adulthood.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, this is crazy. And sorry, I don't
Speaker 3: I feel like I need to apologize about the Helen
Speaker 3: Keller thing and giggling like I don't know. I've just
Speaker 3: seen conspiracies on TikTok. I'm not saying they're true.
Speaker 4: I think you're talking about my kid right now, and
Speaker 4: now I'm identifying with Helen Keller as one of my children.
Speaker 3: Maybe that's why I want to apologize, is because I
Speaker 3: don't want to offend your like I'm not trying to
Speaker 3: if anybody, or if anybody knows Helen, which they didn't,
Speaker 3: but maybe she's a distant relative. I just didn't want
Speaker 3: to be offensive because I think she did a lot
Speaker 3: of amazing things, and she had a teacher and a
Speaker 3: well guy.
Speaker 4: I don't really know a lot about her, but my
Speaker 4: point in the story is she was so excited to share.
Speaker 3: With me that fact when that doesn't seem like to me,
Speaker 3: like that would be a very like so fun.
Speaker 4: I think also, she probably talks about this stuff a lot,
Speaker 4: and when she first said it, I was like, oh,
Speaker 4: I don't really know what that means. So maybe it's
Speaker 4: a way for her to help us understand what she's saying.
Speaker 3: Right, you know, you're intrigued.
Speaker 2: I'm intrigued.
Speaker 3: I'm intrigued too.
Speaker 2: I forget what Patrick's one mutation was probably was like
Speaker 2: blonde hair.
Speaker 3: That's not a mute.
Speaker 2: That's a recessive. Isn't that recessive?
Speaker 3: Oh? I don't know. I don't know anything about these thing.
Speaker 2: That's less likely, but that wouldn't be like a mutation.
Speaker 3: Okay, well keep us posted. This is so interesting. Okay,
Speaker 3: well shall we get into the voicemail?
Speaker 5: Hi, Amy and Kat. My name is McKinsey. I live
Speaker 5: in Texas. You can share all the facts. You can
Speaker 5: play this voicemail before actually getting to the voicemail. Your
Speaker 5: little intro for the voicemail message is super funny. Maybe
Speaker 5: smile before. Like, I want to say something I'm kind
Speaker 5: of sad about. So my feeling is resentment. I have
Speaker 5: a really hard time, especially in the last few years,
Speaker 5: being around people that came from money and kind of
Speaker 5: this expectation that they have around the things that families
Speaker 5: do for them that you know, they had their college
Speaker 5: paid for, they have their parents pay for their weddings,
Speaker 5: they are having babies and these big baby showers where
Speaker 5: they received these really fancy and expensive gifts when I
Speaker 5: didn't come from any of that. And so although I'm
Speaker 5: around it now and I like these people, they're kind
Speaker 5: to people that they don't even realize the privilege that
Speaker 5: they have, and I end up holding up with her
Speaker 5: present'm it against them, and I'm just not really sure
Speaker 5: how to navigate that without holding against them. Well, also
Speaker 5: not having icky feelings whenever I see something good in
Speaker 5: their life that I'm not kidding. So I would love
Speaker 5: just some advice around that. Appreciate that you guys so.
Speaker 3: Good, like a very very very special boy, smil would
Speaker 3: you see what I mean about the man? I know
Speaker 3: you know because we listen to it together, but to
Speaker 3: the listeners, like y'all see what we mean about just
Speaker 3: the tenderness and the honesty and vulnerability there opening up
Speaker 3: and sharing that and being like, hey, you can play
Speaker 3: this and share it with everybody. Thoughts, Kat, you're.
Speaker 2: Just passing that over to me.
Speaker 4: So I think that one the best part about her
Speaker 4: sharing this is her acknowledging it, like we already said,
Speaker 4: because a lot of times when we have those feelings,
Speaker 4: we push them down and we then they end up
Speaker 4: being like pushed towards the other person. And I think
Speaker 4: in that voicemail, she was saying they're good people, like
Speaker 4: this isn't really about them.
Speaker 2: I just don't know what to do with it. I
Speaker 2: think that already is going to relieve something for her.
Speaker 2: I don't know that there is.
Speaker 4: Anything that we can say or do on the podcast
Speaker 4: that's going to help her untangle all of that. It
Speaker 4: sounds like there's something underneath the thing. So she's feeling
Speaker 4: resentment when and correct me if I'm getting some of
Speaker 4: this wrong, but she's feeling resentment when she sees people
Speaker 4: expectant of things financial things from their families, or when
Speaker 4: people just get things that are kind of extravagant in
Speaker 4: her eyes. Okay, that's the thing, But what's the thing
Speaker 4: underneath the thing? And that's what she has to kind
Speaker 4: of unravel with herself. And if she was sitting here,
Speaker 4: I'd probably ask her some questions to get to that.
Speaker 4: But what I can offer her is that feeling of resentment,
Speaker 4: which there might be some jealousy or some envy in
Speaker 4: there too. Jealousy and envy aren't really they're not bad.
Speaker 4: Those help us identify things that we care about and
Speaker 4: things we want, but that might not ever totally go away.
Speaker 4: And so rather than I think when we are looking
Speaker 4: to process things, we want the feeling to go away,
Speaker 4: we think, when we process it, oh, this will then
Speaker 4: go away or dissipate, when a lot of times it
Speaker 4: just maybe shrinks a little bit and then we find
Speaker 4: something else that's there too. So if you're processing this
Speaker 4: and you're doing the digging or doing the work to
Speaker 4: understand what's the thing underneath the thing, know that those
Speaker 4: feelings might be there and this other thing might be there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that whatever the work needs to be
Speaker 3: done to untangle that. I like that word untangle and
Speaker 3: figure out what's underneath there. While the feeling of resentment
Speaker 3: may always be there, maybe it's sometimes it just won't
Speaker 3: be as loud anymore and it won't be as like
Speaker 3: bring up such emotion.
Speaker 4: And maybe just more from resentment to more of this envy.
Speaker 4: I think envy and jealousy get like a bad rap
Speaker 4: when like they can be very helpful. I get jealous
Speaker 4: of people that have things that I want or things
Speaker 4: that I have grieved or things that I never got
Speaker 4: to have. And that's not that I'm mad at those people.
Speaker 4: It's that, oh, dang it, that would have been cool.
Speaker 3: And sometimes it's even information to what you do want
Speaker 3: or what you want to work towards. Some of it
Speaker 3: may or may not be attainable. It's not always going
Speaker 3: to be that, but if it is something you can
Speaker 3: work towards, it can be information of like, well maybe
Speaker 3: that's what I want. Not in this caller's case, I'm
Speaker 3: just saying the feeling of jealousy or envy when that
Speaker 3: does come up, it can be information for that, right right, right, yeah,
Speaker 3: licensed therapist, But what do you.
Speaker 4: Want to talk about what you said earlier and why
Speaker 4: we got into a little SIV? Do you want to
Speaker 4: talk about what you said earlier and why we got
Speaker 4: into a little SIV? Well?
Speaker 3: I think that, like it's it's all in perspective at
Speaker 3: times too, and money is so relative because I don't
Speaker 3: know how she grew up, so that's hard to say.
Speaker 3: I do know that sometimes we can do a lot
Speaker 3: of comparing or feeling like, oh, well, you know, because
Speaker 3: we don't have XYZ, we don't have money, or I
Speaker 3: guess it's not even like a luxury, but we aren't privileged.
Speaker 3: But again not knowing her circumstances specifically, but I just
Speaker 3: think I didn't think I grew up super wealthy, but
Speaker 3: now that I'm an adult, I think I did grow
Speaker 3: up wealthy, ish and privileged, but also my dad went
Speaker 3: bankrupt multiple times, so I had speaking of We were
Speaker 3: talking about roller coaster of emotions earlier. I have such
Speaker 3: a roller coaster of emotions with money. And I think
Speaker 3: we lived in a country club neighborhood. But then my
Speaker 3: dad moved out when I was nine, and my mom
Speaker 3: was a single mom working all the time, and all
Speaker 3: my not all. A lot of my friends in my
Speaker 3: neighborhood went to private school. I went to public school
Speaker 3: with some of my other friends. I don't mean to
Speaker 3: paint it like everybody in my neighborhood went to private school,
Speaker 3: but a lot of people did. But I think I
Speaker 3: compared myself, so to me, I'm like, well, my friends
Speaker 3: in my neighborhood have a lot of money. But then
Speaker 3: anybody looking at my life thinking, oh, she grew up
Speaker 3: in that neighborhood, which my mom never wanted to move
Speaker 3: because she wanted us to live in the same house
Speaker 3: stro eighteen. So she figured that out and then part
Speaker 3: of the divorce, my dad gave her the house. But
Speaker 3: I don't think she would have stayed there. Ideally. It
Speaker 3: wasn't great for her, but she made it work because
Speaker 3: she wanted as little disruption on our lives as possible,
Speaker 3: which I admire a lot. Looking back, There's no way
Speaker 3: someone else would like working with Bobby and knowing how
Speaker 3: he grew up in you were privilege, a trailer park
Speaker 3: and going from house to house and getting evicted, and
Speaker 3: his single mom life was very different than my single
Speaker 3: mom life because I also had a dad that still
Speaker 3: wanted to support us financially, and I was gifted my
Speaker 3: first car and a gas card. Our poor listener who
Speaker 3: left the voicemails listening right now, And I hope not
Speaker 3: having resentment towards me, but I don't think I expect
Speaker 3: that though, But that's what happened. And then my wedding
Speaker 3: paid for my college. I kind of wish he would
Speaker 3: have made it a little more difficult on me, quite honestly,
Speaker 3: And for that very reason, I'm parenting my children differently,
Speaker 3: Like for the first time ever now that our daughter's eighteen,
Speaker 3: and Ben and I had a little sit down with
Speaker 3: her on expectations and money, and for the first time
Speaker 3: ever this month she started paying us like a lump
Speaker 3: sum at the beginning of every month. Now that she's eighteen,
Speaker 3: she's paying us a chunk towards cell phone, car insurance,
Speaker 3: gas and it's a chunk, but she's earning it at
Speaker 3: her job, and then we're trying to get her ready
Speaker 3: for that's what rent and bills will be like. And
Speaker 3: so at the first of every month she is paying us,
Speaker 3: she has an amount due and it's like fork it
Speaker 3: over and she's sort of excited about it.
Speaker 2: And because agency too.
Speaker 3: Yes, that never was expected of me, and I'm sort
Speaker 3: of annoyed that my dad didn't teach me that and
Speaker 3: do that for me of like saying, hey, pay for
Speaker 3: your own cats, pay for your own insurance. Now I
Speaker 3: had friends that did that. Anyway, back to my original point,
Speaker 3: I think money there's all different kinds of conversations you
Speaker 3: can have around it, obviously, but it's so relative because
Speaker 3: I felt less than but that's because people I was
Speaker 3: surrounded by had so much money. But then people would
Speaker 3: look at our lives. Even if you have the opportunity
Speaker 3: to have clean water, you have more than other people.
Speaker 3: I mean, obviously my kids being from Haiti and knowing
Speaker 3: what their life was like at the orphanage, those kids
Speaker 3: there would come look at their life here now and
Speaker 3: be like, oh my gosh, this is crazy. So it's
Speaker 3: all relative. That's what Kat and I were talking about earlier.
Speaker 3: And then I started talking about Becca Bloom beca ex
Speaker 3: Bloom on Instagram, who is this crazy wealthy woman. Actually
Speaker 3: she got really famous on TikTok, but I follow her
Speaker 3: mostly and see her stuff on Instagram and she is
Speaker 3: stupid wealthy and makes these ridiculous over those hop videos.
Speaker 3: But I kind of like her, like she's likable, and
Speaker 3: if you go in the comments, most people are saying
Speaker 3: just that that They're like, you're the only rich person.
Speaker 3: I like, like, there's something about you that's a little endearing.
Speaker 3: And then Kat wasn't really feeling the vibe, and so
Speaker 3: that I got. I suddenly got defensive of this Becca
Speaker 3: girl on Instagram that I don't know in TikTok and
Speaker 3: I'm like, wait, why am I defending this rich girl
Speaker 3: online that I.
Speaker 2: Don't know to you?
Speaker 3: Because I was being a little judgmental, Yeah you are.
Speaker 3: I was like, maybe you have resent me or in
Speaker 3: the or maybe I do you're jealousy. But then you
Speaker 3: were like, well, would you want to yah be that?
Speaker 3: And I was like, well, I don't know, maybe yeah,
Speaker 3: And You're like, I'd never want to be that, and
Speaker 3: I'm like, what, I don't have a worry in the world.
Speaker 2: No, we talked about this.
Speaker 4: I would like to be that wealthy if nothing else
Speaker 4: in my life changed, except I always knew that I'd
Speaker 4: be okay financially, and I'd always know that if I
Speaker 4: needed something or wanted something, I could have it.
Speaker 2: But I wouldn't want to spend that.
Speaker 3: Way, right. But my point was she grew up that way,
Speaker 3: and it's not she was born into that, so her
Speaker 3: spinning that way is very But would you want to
Speaker 3: marry into normal? Well, she doesn't know, like that's her baseline.
Speaker 2: No, that's not my question.
Speaker 4: My question was do you want would you want to
Speaker 4: be born in that? Or knowing what it's like on
Speaker 4: this side of the world, would you not like to
Speaker 4: be born into that?
Speaker 3: I don't know. She was just in Paris. I've never
Speaker 3: been there, and I think she just flew there to
Speaker 3: buy some shoes, So what would I want to do that?
Speaker 2: Maybe that's okay if you don't, but I don't.
Speaker 3: But you're right, like I, I like my life and
Speaker 3: I want to be normal like I I'm there's something
Speaker 3: about her there's just not pretentious, if that's the right word.
Speaker 3: Because she's not pretentious about it. She's being blatantly. Maybe
Speaker 3: watched enough of her videos, maybe I have watched too many.
Speaker 2: And he's like, she's so normal, it's so normal.
Speaker 4: She shows seventeen of her watches and it's okay because
Speaker 4: she didn't buy any of them.
Speaker 2: Somebody just gifted her seventeen yelexes. Yeah, I'm like, wait,
Speaker 2: what we lost the plot here?
Speaker 3: No no no no no no no no no no no.
Speaker 3: I never said she was normal. Back it on, up,
Speaker 3: I never you said. I think in my head, I
Speaker 3: was just picturing her as normal, I said, Kat. She
Speaker 3: packs the caviare in her China lunch box like China,
Speaker 3: like nice China, fine China.
Speaker 4: Yeah, like glat like like I packed my Kroger bags
Speaker 4: right like, and I did throw away my ziplocked bags.
Speaker 4: And she reuses her she does, see yes.
Speaker 3: In one of the videos, her husband is sharing like
Speaker 3: fun facts about her or they are doing it about
Speaker 3: each other, and he's like, something out her is she
Speaker 3: will hire someone, or she wants hand painted wallpaper all
Speaker 3: throughout the house. But she will reuse ziploc bags over
Speaker 3: and over and gets mad if he uses like a
Speaker 3: whole piece of paper towel wild. Yeah, because she doesn't
Speaker 3: want to be wasteful, and who knows how.
Speaker 4: May recycling though she probably is really good at it.
Speaker 4: Maybe and maybe because she well she has a job.
Speaker 4: I was gonna say, if she's not working, then maybe
Speaker 4: can she can spend a lot of money recycling.
Speaker 3: No, she has a job in finance, okay, which that's good.
Speaker 2: So she's really wealthy and she still works, right.
Speaker 3: I think she was from the videos that I've seen,
Speaker 3: the few the few videos that I've seen the few fifty,
Speaker 3: I think her parents had very high expectations for their upbringing,
Speaker 3: like their kids, like they probably had an excellent education,
Speaker 3: like you could tell top top grades were expected.
Speaker 2: We're looking at the outside. We don't know the inside, so.
Speaker 4: We're just I don't know the inside, preparing our insides
Speaker 4: to her outside. And like her life might not be
Speaker 4: a greatest she makes it look like on TikTok.
Speaker 3: But I don't know that she's like saying my life
Speaker 3: is so great. I don't really hear her say, look
Speaker 3: how fabulous my life is.
Speaker 2: That's the thing. Okay.
Speaker 3: So that's where I want to be clear here, which
Speaker 3: all will just have to go watch her videos and
Speaker 3: see for yourself. But it's like there is a difference
Speaker 3: in you know, pretentious people, right like, she doesn't give
Speaker 3: me gums vibes, right Like, I feel like she's cool.
Speaker 2: But you're just trying to get on her like yacht
Speaker 2: or private place. No, no, no, I'm just kidding, not
Speaker 2: at all.
Speaker 4: No, I hear what you're saying. She's not saying like
Speaker 4: I'm better than you. She's just saying, matter of factly,
Speaker 4: this is these are all my watches.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's like, watch me pack my lunch, or this
Speaker 3: is my watch collection and they're all gifts from my
Speaker 3: family and they're special to me. Or here, we're going
Speaker 3: on a date night to a Michelin star restaurant and
Speaker 3: we're stopping at this fancy jeweler beforehand to pick up
Speaker 3: a piece of jewey. And then they come home from
Speaker 3: their date night and they go to their movie theater
Speaker 3: in their house and watch, Uh, what are they watching?
Speaker 2: They get like before that's released to the theaters, movies.
Speaker 3: No, they're watching they were watching a TV show, like
Speaker 3: just like us. Becca Blimb's just like us. The New
Speaker 3: York Times just did a write up on her. I
Speaker 3: believe I saw an article posted and I think her
Speaker 3: real name is Rebecca ma or may or something, and
Speaker 3: she goes by Becca x Bloom. And she only joined
Speaker 3: TikTok in January. It is, We're already mid September. At
Speaker 3: this point, it's almost Christmas. She hasn't even been online
Speaker 3: for a year, and charity has millions of followers. She
Speaker 3: knows what she's doing, like life like playing it up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you had a life like that, you could
Speaker 2: get millions to follow.
Speaker 3: But I don't know that. No, I don't know that
Speaker 3: everybody can do it the way she's doing it. Like
Speaker 3: there are some people that are obnoxious and annoying.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, she's gets more haters. Yeah, yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Feel like something about it. But definitely how about this,
Speaker 3: check it out see for yourself.
Speaker 4: Give me another week, let me look at more of
Speaker 4: her stuff and let it sink in, and then maybe
Speaker 4: I won't have this automatic reaction.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'd definitely being a hater. You were the kitchen counter.
Speaker 3: Yeah me too. I just found somebody that I like online,
Speaker 3: not because.
Speaker 4: I want to.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry apology existed, but I also was a little
Speaker 3: sib about it. And back to the whole thing. It's
Speaker 3: like relative, Like she she has a lot of money,
Speaker 3: but there are wealthier people that might have more money
Speaker 3: than her, and she might think like, oh wow, I
Speaker 3: do not think she thinks that, probably not that she
Speaker 3: has never one to for anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I get what you're saying, and I agree that it
Speaker 4: is relative, but there is a limit to it where
Speaker 4: it's like, Okay, you're like crazy rich, you're not.
Speaker 2: That's what us relatives.
Speaker 3: Get confused about, really really really crazy rich hundreds of
Speaker 3: millions type people and they just like keep making money,
Speaker 3: make their money. Well, I understand being smart with them
Speaker 3: making money off of money, but they like want more.
Speaker 3: Could never be me like like they want more, It's
Speaker 3: like what are you wanting for?
Speaker 2: Like what's the well that's their like brain because this
Speaker 2: is the whole Taylor Swift thing. Like I have said this.
Speaker 4: I've had this to Patrick about like multiple people that
Speaker 4: if I was were talking about Michael Jordan the other
Speaker 4: day he has like three billion dollars or something crazy
Speaker 4: like that, and in my head I was like, once
Speaker 4: I make a billion dollars, I'm not working anymore.
Speaker 2: Right, But those people their brain is wired.
Speaker 4: Differently that it's not just about the money. It's about
Speaker 4: what they're accomplishing and like the actual work. Like Taylor
Speaker 4: Swift really likes what she does, it's not just about
Speaker 4: the money. Yeah, I think that's a nice little bonus bonus,
Speaker 4: but like, yeah, if I was Taylor Swift, I wouldn't
Speaker 4: work another day in my life. Their brains are wired
Speaker 4: so differently than me. If I was a therapist and
Speaker 4: I made a billion dollars for well, that would never happen.
Speaker 2: I'd be done.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you would have the desire to maybe help.
Speaker 3: You could volunteer. Yeah, you wouldn't just like sit around.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I would shield a movie theater in my house
Speaker 4: like Bega Bloom, and I would watch TV shows in
Speaker 4: the houseband. No, I would do other things, but I
Speaker 4: wouldn't still have this drive to work that crazy of hours.
Speaker 3: Oh this just popped into my head a relatable Becca
Speaker 3: Bloom video that I saw where she posted she goes,
Speaker 3: these are the houses that my fiance and I were
Speaker 3: considering buying. She talks a real soft like this. She's like,
Speaker 3: these are the houses that we were considering buying, But
Speaker 3: we did it, and I'm going to tell you the
Speaker 3: reasons why and then she shows them. Of course they're
Speaker 3: like mega mansions, but she's like this one, she's like, honestly,
Speaker 3: it wasn't in the school district that we wanted.
Speaker 2: Relatable, right, So it's like, I get that. I just
Speaker 2: went through that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then some of the other reasons were very
Speaker 3: similar to things we contemplate as.
Speaker 2: It wasn't like the normal people. It wasn't coated in
Speaker 2: gold foil ceilings. That's not what it was. It was
Speaker 2: more like actual No.
Speaker 3: But the other one, like she was like, and this one,
Speaker 3: my husband couldn't get over the price per square foot.
Speaker 3: He said was way overpriced and it just didn't make sense.
Speaker 3: But it's like at that point they probably just bought it,
Speaker 3: like who cares, but they're still paying attention to price
Speaker 3: per square foot. See, they're just like us. She's relatable.
Speaker 3: It's relatable. Okay, well, I have no idea our Our
Speaker 3: advice was helpful, but to your point, like you said,
Speaker 3: there's nothing we could say or do other than celebrate
Speaker 3: her for acknowledging and being aware and sharing with us,
Speaker 3: because that's it probably felt very cathartic and maybe even
Speaker 3: why it evoked that emotion and tears because just getting
Speaker 3: it off your chest sometimes can feel so good and know,
Speaker 3: like I'm sharing this with someone, I'm gonna figure this out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And what's popping up in my head.
Speaker 4: I don't know if this is coming from what you
Speaker 4: shared or just my brain, but I think when you
Speaker 4: grow up without something, two things happen. A lot of
Speaker 4: things happen, but two specifically things happen. One you have
Speaker 4: more of an awareness of that thing that you don't have,
Speaker 4: and two you learn and like you grow from having
Speaker 4: to do it yourself. And so I wonder, because I
Speaker 4: don't know if she said this or not in the voicemail,
Speaker 4: if there's this idea that her friends don't understand what
Speaker 4: they have, you know, right, appreciation for it, which like
Speaker 4: there's no way for us to.
Speaker 2: Really know that.
Speaker 4: We can take context clues, but like we can't really
Speaker 4: know because even you talking about, like my mom offering
Speaker 4: me something, whether or not I accept it or not,
Speaker 4: doesn't mean I am not understanding or I am understanding
Speaker 4: what she's giving me, Like I have an acute awareness
Speaker 4: of what she's offering me.
Speaker 2: But you would never know that from the out from
Speaker 2: looking at the outside, you know, Yeah.
Speaker 3: I mean I know it because I'm your friend and
Speaker 3: I know that you also have extreme gratitude for your parents.
Speaker 3: I'm almost thinking too, just because we were talking about
Speaker 3: loss of my parents and you have both of yours.
Speaker 3: It would almost be like sometimes I might have like
Speaker 3: a hint of envy or jealousy towards you, of like
Speaker 3: the convenience of you just like popping down my dad
Speaker 3: would do it right, right right, Or you're like, oh,
Speaker 3: I got a swing by my parents' house and they're
Speaker 3: gonna help with this. And sometimes I have like a
Speaker 3: quick thought but it's not lasting or it's not similar
Speaker 3: to the voicemail where I have this extreme emotion about it.
Speaker 3: But right I don't have like a resentment towards you
Speaker 3: because I know that you are grateful for your parents
Speaker 3: and you appreciate them. Now, if you were taking them
Speaker 3: for granted and had a totally different attitude about your
Speaker 3: relationship and how helpful your dad was towards helping you
Speaker 3: with different things, then I might have a little bit
Speaker 3: more resentment of being like, do you realize how lucky
Speaker 3: you are to have a dad that can do that
Speaker 3: for you? Right now? I would give anything for my
Speaker 3: dad do that, But I know how I know you,
Speaker 3: Like you said, you have an acute awareness of how
Speaker 3: fortunate you are.
Speaker 2: And so maybe you have sadness that comes up. Maybe
Speaker 2: that's yeah.
Speaker 3: I mean sometimes I may have feelings of sadness or
Speaker 3: jealousy or envy, like, oh, I wish my parents were around,
Speaker 3: but I don't have that resentment towards you. And I
Speaker 3: wonder to your point, Yeah, if she knew the perspective
Speaker 3: her friends had, because she said they're kind people, and
Speaker 3: maybe she could be assigning to them that they have
Speaker 3: this expectation or maybe they've acted that way and she
Speaker 3: has that data or that information. But sometimes we can
Speaker 3: just project that on other people and think they expect it,
Speaker 3: when really maybe they do have awareness and they are
Speaker 3: grateful and they don't expect it, but their parents just
Speaker 3: do it. It could be a combo.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And when we have a story written in our head,
Speaker 2: what we end up doing is we are brains only.
Speaker 4: Look for the data that supports that story. So she
Speaker 4: could be picking up things that maybe not aren't even
Speaker 4: really accurate.
Speaker 3: So the challenge there which this could be helpful, would
Speaker 3: be to try to see if that's what you're doing. Man.
Speaker 2: But that's so inncisely at the end.
Speaker 3: Well, I just mean, like I was like, I hope
Speaker 3: we've been helpful, because there's nothing we could really like.
Speaker 3: It's really one of like, it's work she needs to do,
Speaker 3: either one on one with a therapist or digging deeper
Speaker 3: and seeing what's underneath there. But that's something that we
Speaker 3: offered her a good job. Yeah, okay, and she can
Speaker 3: follow Becca Bloom and get really angry.
Speaker 2: I'm going to encourage you not to do that.
Speaker 3: Definitely could do that, although we don't know that Becca
Speaker 3: expects it.
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna say, maybe now's not the time for her.
Speaker 4: To do that.
Speaker 3: Okay, definitely not. Okay, Kat's the therapist, listen to her.
Speaker 3: We hope that everybody has the day they need to have.
Speaker 3: That's not the way we say it.
Speaker 2: Hope you have the day.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I said it wrong. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: I hope that you're having the day. I hope you
Speaker 2: have the day.
Speaker 3: Day. You're wearing the shirt right now, Kat's wearing our
Speaker 3: shirt that says have the day you need to have,
Speaker 3: which we'll have an update on merch soon ish. We're
Speaker 3: cooking up something special. We are cooking. We're cooking. Yes, Okay,
Speaker 3: so stay tuned. We'll probably share first on Instagram to
Speaker 3: make sure you're following Feeling things podcast right right right, Okay,
Speaker 3: have the day you need to have.
Speaker 2: Bye Bye,