WEBVTT - Laughing Through My Pain (w/ Kier "Junior" Spates) 0:00:01.200 --> 0:00:04.760 Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. Wherever you are, you 0:00:04.840 --> 0:00:07.400 are tuned in to the Vitamin D Podcast with your 0:00:07.440 --> 0:00:09.440 host a Dawn Day, and we're here to get you 0:00:09.480 --> 0:00:12.200 excited about your life. We want you to feel good, 0:00:12.520 --> 0:00:15.160 live life on purpose and for a purpose. But as 0:00:15.280 --> 0:00:18.320 life goes, there are ups and downs. So what happens 0:00:18.320 --> 0:00:20.759 when life hits you hard? You know, sometimes it's like 0:00:20.800 --> 0:00:23.079 that continuous slow and then you get that one hit 0:00:23.280 --> 0:00:25.400 that just feels like it just knocks the wind out 0:00:25.400 --> 0:00:28.360 of you. Now, I'm not talking about losing your keys, 0:00:28.440 --> 0:00:31.200 your phone, you can't find your parking spot. I'm talking 0:00:31.240 --> 0:00:34.520 about those big losses like a loss of a loved one, 0:00:34.760 --> 0:00:38.879 a friend, a career, a bad health diagnosis, whatever the 0:00:38.920 --> 0:00:40.920 case may be. We're living in a series of a 0:00:40.960 --> 0:00:43.879 crisis worldwide. It's causing us to open our eyes and 0:00:43.920 --> 0:00:46.640 to see what's going on around us. So today I 0:00:46.680 --> 0:00:48.559 want to focus on the positive that can come out 0:00:48.560 --> 0:00:52.400 of pain. Because while pain is inevitable, suffering isn't. While 0:00:52.440 --> 0:00:54.480 we will be hurt by major losses in our lives, 0:00:54.520 --> 0:00:57.480 it doesn't have to rule us out. While we may 0:00:57.480 --> 0:00:59.480 be hurt by the major losses in our lives, we 0:00:59.520 --> 0:01:02.080 don't have to be ruled by them. You know, I 0:01:02.120 --> 0:01:04.560 came across this broat and it goes. If you feel 0:01:04.600 --> 0:01:08.040 like you're losing everything, remember that trees lose their leaves 0:01:08.080 --> 0:01:10.200 every year, and yet they stand tall and wait for 0:01:10.240 --> 0:01:13.160 better days to come. Let me say that again. If 0:01:13.160 --> 0:01:16.679 you feel like you're losing everything, remember that trees lose 0:01:16.720 --> 0:01:20.480 their leaves every year, and yet they stand tall and 0:01:20.520 --> 0:01:22.600 wait for better days to come. You are going to 0:01:22.680 --> 0:01:25.959 have to stand tall for better days to come to 0:01:26.080 --> 0:01:30.039 that end. I'm talking to a friend, a mentor, a colleague, 0:01:30.480 --> 0:01:33.479 and too many known as your favorite play cousin from 0:01:33.480 --> 0:01:36.679 the Steve Harvey Morning Show and Mr Kid Junior Space. 0:01:37.160 --> 0:01:39.920 You don't know I've almost died seven times. I'm almost 0:01:40.240 --> 0:01:42.920 We're gonna talk a little bit about his life here. 0:01:42.920 --> 0:01:44.960 Has been in the comedy world for over twenty years. 0:01:45.240 --> 0:01:48.120 He's traveled with the likes of Aretha Franklin, Keith Sweat, 0:01:48.320 --> 0:01:51.240 and even Steve Harvey. I mean, the list truly goes 0:01:51.320 --> 0:01:53.320 on and on. But what you may not know from 0:01:53.360 --> 0:01:58.080 Kiras that in eighteen he found his best friend dead 0:01:58.320 --> 0:02:01.320 in an hotel room. It talks about how he overcame 0:02:01.400 --> 0:02:04.280 that he also talks about how Steve Harve you invested 0:02:04.320 --> 0:02:08.160 in his acorn. I'm telling you this conversation is riveting. 0:02:08.400 --> 0:02:10.560 There's gonna be a lot of inside six on pool 0:02:10.639 --> 0:02:13.399 at your heart strings. But guess what, you are going 0:02:13.480 --> 0:02:17.200 to walk out feeling excited about your life. So, without 0:02:17.240 --> 0:02:22.359 further ado, it's time for your dogs vitamin dam right 0:02:22.880 --> 0:02:33.560 with me and get excited about what's happening. How are 0:02:33.560 --> 0:02:37.799 you doing? Good? My best life? I can tell you 0:02:37.800 --> 0:02:40.800 all your future so bright they'll starnish shames on boys stall. 0:02:41.200 --> 0:02:43.080 I just walking the house. I just got half I've 0:02:43.080 --> 0:02:45.280 been at all day like that, I've been been in 0:02:45.320 --> 0:02:48.720 these I just walked in the house, got all my laptop. Look, 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:53.520 you're done, date doing thank gird. I know, girl, how 0:02:53.520 --> 0:02:58.400 many studio days I've seen you in all kinds of 0:02:58.400 --> 0:03:00.320 shapes and forms. You've seen it from the but get 0:03:00.360 --> 0:03:03.120 into right. The first person I saw with it a 0:03:03.160 --> 0:03:06.080 contra tattoo in your mouth, I was like, get out 0:03:06.080 --> 0:03:10.320 of here now, black panther, go, oh my god. Can 0:03:10.440 --> 0:03:17.400 you believe that it is in there? And you know 0:03:17.480 --> 0:03:19.840 what it says? Life? Because I speak life. You know 0:03:19.880 --> 0:03:23.040 what I'm saying, speaking life forever? What kind of baby, yeah, 0:03:23.040 --> 0:03:25.520 what kind of what ever? We just you know, this 0:03:25.560 --> 0:03:28.080 goes right in the topic because talking about Chadwick Boseman 0:03:28.160 --> 0:03:31.639 and rest in peace to him. But this going signs 0:03:31.720 --> 0:03:33.519 with that of why you gotta live your best life. 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:36.280 So let me tell you. Vitamin D is a pun 0:03:36.320 --> 0:03:39.200 off my name. You get vitamin D from the sun. 0:03:39.440 --> 0:03:42.440 So I shed light into your life three podcast. Uh 0:03:42.480 --> 0:03:45.080 huh huh. So what we're gonna talk about today is 0:03:45.120 --> 0:03:47.360 just everyday life of what you've been through. And I 0:03:47.440 --> 0:03:50.480 want people that here, you on the radio, watch you 0:03:50.520 --> 0:03:53.400 on TV, go to your comedy specials to know a 0:03:53.400 --> 0:03:55.200 little bit about you and like, oh K did it? 0:03:55.280 --> 0:04:01.840 So can? I absolutely absolutely all of that is feasible people, Um, 0:04:01.880 --> 0:04:03.480 I mean, look at that, look at that mean, look 0:04:03.520 --> 0:04:06.720 at that leader, look at that mentor you know, the 0:04:06.760 --> 0:04:10.920 confortence of me and Mrs Harvey had or the reason 0:04:10.960 --> 0:04:15.880 why you think about your entire existence, not just your 0:04:15.920 --> 0:04:19.040 life but Geren types isn't because to me, one person 0:04:19.279 --> 0:04:24.080 who can project you to another didition. What I mean, 0:04:24.240 --> 0:04:26.680 my whole life that I have been living before him 0:04:26.839 --> 0:04:29.839 was just to meet this one person who could change 0:04:29.839 --> 0:04:35.240 the projection of my entire existence. That's what Harvey is. 0:04:35.800 --> 0:04:40.280 That's what you have to acknowledge because not only did 0:04:40.320 --> 0:04:43.840 he jam my lifetime, but but whatever situations I've been 0:04:43.880 --> 0:04:46.960 going through, and we talk about these things, this is 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:49.600 a public part. This is this is not about this 0:04:49.640 --> 0:04:51.599 is a private part. This is things we talk about 0:04:52.080 --> 0:04:55.159 that I know I've said to him, and trying to 0:04:56.680 --> 0:05:00.400 move through so many different things in life. And see, 0:05:00.440 --> 0:05:03.960 I didn't have a father like that, I didn't have 0:05:04.000 --> 0:05:07.719 a friend like that. You know, you know you was 0:05:07.760 --> 0:05:11.120 there when when my my friend died, the one I had, 0:05:12.160 --> 0:05:19.000 Brian Look died and then I had Harvey, and Harvey 0:05:19.200 --> 0:05:21.800 what people know when I was at the lowest at 0:05:21.800 --> 0:05:24.880 that point in time, Mr Harvey called me every day 0:05:25.000 --> 0:05:27.400 and he just kept saying words of encouragement, like, Man, 0:05:27.480 --> 0:05:29.880 we need you. Then is showing the same without you 0:05:29.960 --> 0:05:34.280 on it? Man, I'm trying to move past the situation 0:05:35.240 --> 0:05:39.679 that I was not prepared for. Nobody's prepared to lose 0:05:39.720 --> 0:05:42.480 their best friend. You ain't prepared for that part. And 0:05:42.480 --> 0:05:44.120 and as much as you're trying to think about it, 0:05:44.160 --> 0:05:45.800 what it could have felt like, it knocked the wind 0:05:45.839 --> 0:05:48.880 out of you. You know it's gonna it's gonna take everything, man, 0:05:48.880 --> 0:05:50.760 because I had never been to a situation like that. 0:05:50.800 --> 0:05:54.159 You're not prepared for what Brian had gave me. And 0:05:54.200 --> 0:05:57.720 I was talking to somebody earlier about Brian today actually, 0:05:57.800 --> 0:06:00.520 but when he when he had gave me was a 0:06:00.560 --> 0:06:04.760 sense of you belong where. You don't get that all 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:08.839 the time. And just because when I first started telling 0:06:08.920 --> 0:06:11.920 Joe's Bryan was dude over there since day one and 0:06:11.920 --> 0:06:15.000 then God snatched him. Are you trying to figure out 0:06:15.360 --> 0:06:19.320 how do you make it pass like this? With everything 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:22.040 else you got going on? I just wish I had 0:06:22.120 --> 0:06:25.919 him back, man, because he was a sense of base. 0:06:26.040 --> 0:06:27.920 He gave me a base. He gave me a base 0:06:28.000 --> 0:06:30.360 about everything. We talked, talked about some man different things 0:06:30.440 --> 0:06:33.960 about how I handled this whole startom how do you 0:06:34.040 --> 0:06:37.479 handle this and that? And hey man, you just gotta 0:06:37.520 --> 0:06:39.120 continue to be in you. But the way he was 0:06:39.160 --> 0:06:41.480 saying it different days and we would laugh at all 0:06:41.480 --> 0:06:44.479 these different things, and then that's gone. And you're not 0:06:44.480 --> 0:06:47.120 gonna attest to that because because you met him toil, 0:06:47.200 --> 0:06:49.039 you know, it was around when I first started. He 0:06:49.080 --> 0:06:51.480 always talked so highly of you, and he said, how 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:54.160 y'all went way back and started in the business and 0:06:54.200 --> 0:06:56.760 how he said. He was like, that's my boy. He 0:06:56.880 --> 0:06:58.839 was like, I believe in my boy. I'm a stand 0:06:58.880 --> 0:07:02.080 by my boy no matter what. The first fan I 0:07:02.200 --> 0:07:05.159 ever had. So when your first fan you ever had 0:07:05.600 --> 0:07:09.920 get slashed away from you, it's very difficult. Because when 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:14.040 I couldn't see he had the vision, I couldn't see 0:07:14.080 --> 0:07:17.160 that far because I was like, yo, dude, I'm tired 0:07:17.160 --> 0:07:21.440 of this. He's like, hey, man, you can be tired. 0:07:22.360 --> 0:07:26.040 You can't stop you, but you can't out stop. But 0:07:26.120 --> 0:07:28.200 he would say you can be tired talking about I'm 0:07:28.200 --> 0:07:31.920 here for I'm here to hold you up. And he 0:07:31.920 --> 0:07:34.320 would do that, and we and and in the the places 0:07:34.360 --> 0:07:38.120 we had been and the and the the the when 0:07:38.200 --> 0:07:40.640 we were doing the things we were doing and I 0:07:40.720 --> 0:07:44.200 was trying to make a name for myself. He was 0:07:44.240 --> 0:07:47.520 there at every stage, at every point, Like when I 0:07:47.560 --> 0:07:51.000 would come off from opening up for Frankie Beverly and Maids. 0:07:51.440 --> 0:07:55.040 He he was right there. When I open up for 0:07:55.200 --> 0:07:58.080 Keith Sweat, he was right there on the side. When 0:07:58.120 --> 0:08:00.120 I came off for BB King, he was on the 0:08:00.240 --> 0:08:02.840 side when I opened for Bretha Franklin. He was on 0:08:02.880 --> 0:08:05.320 the side Anita Baker. He was right down the side. 0:08:05.840 --> 0:08:08.720 That was the dude that would turn to. But he 0:08:08.800 --> 0:08:13.040 taught me so much about encouragement, which led me to 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:17.400 keep going on the mission. And then when we got 0:08:17.480 --> 0:08:20.880 to the morning show, when I got the news that 0:08:21.440 --> 0:08:24.360 Steve was gonna hiring me, He's the first person I 0:08:24.600 --> 0:08:27.960 called and he was the happiest. He was like, what 0:08:28.000 --> 0:08:31.560 did I tell you? You had a real chill leader, 0:08:31.680 --> 0:08:34.600 somebody that was down for you. I had, but he 0:08:34.640 --> 0:08:38.480 was like, what did I tell you? And then I 0:08:38.520 --> 0:08:43.079 appreciate it more on that day, because there was the 0:08:43.200 --> 0:08:45.120 day we were talking about. See what I'm saying. We 0:08:45.320 --> 0:08:49.880 drove everywhere, we were flying. He was driving across to 0:08:50.200 --> 0:08:55.839 from from Houston, from Texas to Birmingham to Virginia to 0:08:57.120 --> 0:09:03.960 uh North Dakota to Arizona to New Mexico. We was 0:09:04.160 --> 0:09:08.400 driving all of these places. So he used you mentioned. 0:09:08.480 --> 0:09:11.280 So just for those who are unaware what happened with Brian, 0:09:11.920 --> 0:09:17.200 how did Brian pass? In Atlanta? Um? We had went 0:09:17.280 --> 0:09:22.160 to uh Sear City Club six one seven that night, 0:09:23.080 --> 0:09:25.839 I went to dinner, you know, just you know, because 0:09:25.840 --> 0:09:28.520 we was living in California and just just places when 0:09:28.520 --> 0:09:30.880 I was living here before, we just frequent these spots. 0:09:31.679 --> 0:09:34.280 We go there, we had a couple of cigars. You know, 0:09:34.400 --> 0:09:37.839 Brian never drank, but we just from the cigar. He 0:09:37.960 --> 0:09:40.559 just enjoyed from cigars. Ain't we're gonna go here, we 0:09:40.600 --> 0:09:44.079 gonna smoke here, never drinking in at that. So we're 0:09:44.120 --> 0:09:48.920 at six one seven. He was about eleven o'clock and 0:09:50.559 --> 0:09:53.400 I was asking was he good? I said, man, you're good. 0:09:54.520 --> 0:09:57.000 And for some reason, Brian was moving to slow motion 0:09:57.280 --> 0:10:01.120 like everything else was at regular speed, but his head 0:10:01.160 --> 0:10:06.040 and on was so slow. He was like, I was like, 0:10:07.800 --> 0:10:09.839 this ain't normally What's stop going on? Because I'm looking 0:10:09.880 --> 0:10:11.640 at everything else. But I was like, why is this too? 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:15.120 Moving in slow motion? This dude is what is he doing? 0:10:17.040 --> 0:10:20.280 And so we get back to hotel about twelve something, 0:10:20.640 --> 0:10:23.880 about twelve fifteen, he on the sixth floor. I'm on 0:10:23.880 --> 0:10:27.400 the third floor of the w here in Atlanta, and 0:10:28.040 --> 0:10:31.960 I was like, hey, man, see the morning. His last 0:10:31.960 --> 0:10:35.040 words was, hey man, don't be late. Twelve o'clock. Car 0:10:35.120 --> 0:10:36.920 be here to pick us up. Go back to the airport. 0:10:37.000 --> 0:10:39.000 I was like, dog one am I ever late? You know, 0:10:39.120 --> 0:10:41.400 just being me just well, I'm an ever late, don't 0:10:41.400 --> 0:10:43.920 I ain't knowing late damn well and be downstairs at 0:10:43.960 --> 0:10:46.679 twelve o'clock. He was like, hey man, I'm just telling 0:10:46.760 --> 0:10:51.000 you twelve o'clock. They said, I love you man. I 0:10:51.040 --> 0:10:53.679 was like, hey man, what you too. I didn't even 0:10:53.800 --> 0:10:56.320 know that was on the last time we spoke. And 0:10:56.360 --> 0:10:58.319 then I woke up that ext morning and I was 0:10:58.400 --> 0:11:00.680 downstairs and eating breakfast for the friend of mine about 0:11:00.679 --> 0:11:03.640 a business preposition. We're talking about this, and I just 0:11:03.679 --> 0:11:06.880 called him. I said, hey, you know, come down breakfast. 0:11:06.960 --> 0:11:09.960 Let's to eat breakfast because we gotta leave. And he 0:11:10.080 --> 0:11:14.240 never showed up. And then about twelve something two months later, 0:11:14.880 --> 0:11:16.679 when they came to me and said, hey, you might 0:11:16.720 --> 0:11:19.880 want to come see this. I never ran so fast 0:11:19.920 --> 0:11:23.160 in my life. And I knew that I knew what 0:11:23.160 --> 0:11:25.240 it was. I knew that he was having I knew 0:11:25.280 --> 0:11:28.360 he had problems with seizures and stuff. I knew because 0:11:28.360 --> 0:11:32.080 it was the one that so I ran to the womb. 0:11:32.440 --> 0:11:36.199 I rolled him over and it just was what it was. 0:11:36.360 --> 0:11:39.120 And it was like I was asking him to get up. 0:11:39.280 --> 0:11:41.560 I asked him, coll Man, we gotta go, we gotta 0:11:41.600 --> 0:11:43.640 fight the KTCH, we gotta go. And it was like 0:11:43.840 --> 0:11:45.640 when need you leave? The room. I was like, I'm 0:11:45.640 --> 0:11:48.760 not leaving room. I was about bed friend, did y'all leave? 0:11:49.040 --> 0:11:53.640 I'm not leaving him? And that's when I realized that 0:11:53.800 --> 0:11:57.960 my first cheerleader was gone. I realized he was just 0:11:58.559 --> 0:12:00.200 he was just gone. You know. It was just one 0:12:00.200 --> 0:12:02.640 of the thing we realized, like, hey, for the first 0:12:02.679 --> 0:12:04.680 time in my life, I never felt so alarm. And 0:12:04.720 --> 0:12:10.360 then you know tim z videos and yeah, I was like, 0:12:10.640 --> 0:12:14.480 I hated. I hated that part about my life. I 0:12:14.520 --> 0:12:18.440 hated because the hardest thing was to call his parents 0:12:18.440 --> 0:12:21.600 and say, Hey, your son's gone. But at the same time, 0:12:21.640 --> 0:12:24.200 I never gave them any details about what I saw 0:12:24.360 --> 0:12:27.200 in the room, and I knew somebody, you know, Joel, 0:12:27.280 --> 0:12:30.760 had sold the story, and I just couldn't believe people 0:12:30.800 --> 0:12:34.880 could be like that in a very private moment, extremely 0:12:34.920 --> 0:12:40.080 private moments. How long did you stay in there with him? Oh? Man, 0:12:40.320 --> 0:12:44.480 there was the longest day of my life. Um, I'm 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:48.559 probably only in the room about fifteen minutes because they 0:12:49.280 --> 0:12:53.199 they had to the fourth beam the room and then 0:12:53.240 --> 0:12:56.280 I just remember going outside his room, was on my knees, 0:12:56.600 --> 0:13:01.920 just bawling. But the assess for that day for the 0:13:01.960 --> 0:13:04.000 corner to come all the types of it was a 0:13:04.440 --> 0:13:06.480 it was a whole day process. It was one of 0:13:06.480 --> 0:13:09.480 those things like you really are getting the fact that 0:13:10.760 --> 0:13:13.360 he was going. So Mr Harvey was in Atlanta to 0:13:13.440 --> 0:13:15.640 at that time. He didn't come to the hotel because 0:13:15.640 --> 0:13:17.680 it has been a new story. But we talked about it. 0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:20.559 He's like, man, I can't come, I said, Harve, I 0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:23.040 don't want you to come. He said, but I'll sit 0:13:23.080 --> 0:13:27.160 in Blue And Blue came. Uncle Harvey's want his friend. 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:30.600 He came. Blue came and helped me through the whole 0:13:30.600 --> 0:13:35.640 situation because you don't know how to deal with somebody dying, 0:13:35.960 --> 0:13:39.480 like I don't know how to find the body. I 0:13:39.480 --> 0:13:43.360 don't know, I know corner, nothing about that. And Blue 0:13:43.600 --> 0:13:47.280 helped me and assisted me for that whole day because 0:13:47.320 --> 0:13:50.080 I had to worry about all those different things. You know, 0:13:50.280 --> 0:13:53.080 I just knew that I didn't even get I didn't 0:13:53.080 --> 0:13:54.920 even I don't know how they got the better that 0:13:54.960 --> 0:13:56.679 I didn't have to see it. This just just the 0:13:56.800 --> 0:14:00.199 thing was just you didn't want to see it. A lot, Loan, 0:14:00.240 --> 0:14:01.880 you don't even know if you're really there and seeing 0:14:01.920 --> 0:14:04.240 what you're saying, What are you hearing? What is everybody 0:14:04.360 --> 0:14:09.720 talking about? Yeah, everybody was talking all these different things, 0:14:09.880 --> 0:14:12.920 you know, and they were saying all these different things, 0:14:12.960 --> 0:14:15.920 and you can hear the conversations. I just was in 0:14:15.920 --> 0:14:19.520 a corner. There's one Atlanta police officers set with me 0:14:19.600 --> 0:14:23.800 for the whole day and I can't remember his name, 0:14:23.880 --> 0:14:26.320 but this officer sat with me for the entire that 0:14:26.400 --> 0:14:30.040 he came at twelve. He lead to ten something because 0:14:30.520 --> 0:14:34.440 they took about ten hours from as to be over. Um, 0:14:34.480 --> 0:14:37.760 you know, I had to get Brian's parents. His dad 0:14:37.840 --> 0:14:40.440 came down, and his sister came down because she didn't 0:14:40.440 --> 0:14:44.120 want her dad to be alarmed. So the ways everybody 0:14:44.120 --> 0:14:47.320 got there, everybody had a hotel room. It's one of 0:14:47.360 --> 0:14:51.440 the day. It was just a long, long day. It's 0:14:51.440 --> 0:14:53.880 one of the hardest things. But I learned so much 0:14:54.040 --> 0:15:00.080 during that day about what your tolerance is. Sometimes you 0:15:00.120 --> 0:15:02.760 have to look at what's the stress level, Like everybody 0:15:02.760 --> 0:15:06.080 has a stress level. You've got one level you're at, 0:15:07.080 --> 0:15:10.560 and so you look at what Brian Sting was, like, 0:15:10.680 --> 0:15:14.680 what's the breaking point? You know, what is your breaking point? 0:15:15.560 --> 0:15:17.800 A lot of people don't know where the breaking point 0:15:17.920 --> 0:15:20.480 is because they have not put at that level. Well, 0:15:20.520 --> 0:15:23.720 that day, I learned that my my stress level is 0:15:23.760 --> 0:15:28.080 this part my breaking point is this high on, way 0:15:28.120 --> 0:15:31.120 above my stress level, because I had to experience something 0:15:32.040 --> 0:15:34.720 that showed me that how much you really can tolerate, 0:15:35.160 --> 0:15:38.280 even as other as it is, you know as it is, 0:15:38.360 --> 0:15:42.960 you know, you know, I'm sidday go by that I 0:15:43.000 --> 0:15:45.480 don't think about the first person that I had as 0:15:45.520 --> 0:15:49.240 a fan and a friend. You know, you know, spar 0:15:49.400 --> 0:15:51.360 from friends. You was sixteen, you know the end of that. 0:15:51.560 --> 0:15:55.240 So he said, that's my boy, he he said, that's 0:15:55.520 --> 0:15:57.960 he said. I always got his bad a lot of 0:15:57.960 --> 0:15:59.840 times when I was on stage. I was point, I'll 0:15:59.880 --> 0:16:02.640 just performing for him because we would we would be 0:16:02.760 --> 0:16:05.280 riding in the car, right kneed jokes and like Dog 0:16:05.320 --> 0:16:08.400 Washington do this tonight? Won to say it. I'm gonna 0:16:08.440 --> 0:16:10.800 say we talked about on this little five hour ride. 0:16:11.120 --> 0:16:13.720 I'm gonna say it, and he could like say it, 0:16:14.080 --> 0:16:19.480 say it and it would go just like we're playing, 0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:23.440 you know, it would go just like we're playing. And 0:16:23.480 --> 0:16:28.040 then I just learned so much from that one loss 0:16:29.600 --> 0:16:32.360 about who I was as a person. It's funny that 0:16:32.440 --> 0:16:35.400 you can lose something and discover something about yourself. What 0:16:35.520 --> 0:16:39.520 you say, say that again? I lost something that was important. 0:16:40.960 --> 0:16:44.320 But what I learned was in the process was how 0:16:44.360 --> 0:16:49.280 big of a person I was through the loss doing wrong. 0:16:49.560 --> 0:16:53.800 The hurt is there still there. It's a daily hurt. 0:16:54.520 --> 0:16:58.640 What I found out was I can absolutely respect the 0:16:58.680 --> 0:17:03.200 fact that he meant that much and he showed me 0:17:03.360 --> 0:17:09.440 exactly who I was by the loss, not by while 0:17:09.520 --> 0:17:12.520 he was here. C he was just my dude. We 0:17:12.480 --> 0:17:15.600 were running together. I went to other he was gone, 0:17:16.400 --> 0:17:19.280 that I realized how much he taught me and by 0:17:19.320 --> 0:17:23.040 how much I was of a person. If I never 0:17:23.040 --> 0:17:26.240 would have lost him, I never wouldn't realize with all. 0:17:26.520 --> 0:17:29.560 And so God has a way of giving you something 0:17:29.640 --> 0:17:32.040 to build up to, and then you lose it, and 0:17:32.040 --> 0:17:35.159 you can realize that in that loss, oh my gosh, 0:17:35.280 --> 0:17:38.520 I'm way much stronger than I am. Come on, but 0:17:38.760 --> 0:17:43.120 one person it was. It was the one person that 0:17:43.240 --> 0:17:48.960 gave me the most. And and then you lose that part. Well, well, 0:17:49.000 --> 0:17:51.320 well I gonna have those experiences. That's just what life. 0:17:51.440 --> 0:17:54.879 You are blessed enough to have a relationship like yours. 0:17:54.920 --> 0:17:57.040 Whoever you love the most, think about the day they're 0:17:57.080 --> 0:18:00.800 gonna be gone. It's not it's not they on you 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:03.320 thinking about like what This is what I loved about 0:18:03.359 --> 0:18:07.240 this person. This is what I appreciated about this person. 0:18:07.640 --> 0:18:11.080 This is what this person actually showed me. And then 0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:14.080 I think everything I did from Brian, I take it 0:18:14.200 --> 0:18:18.840 and I get to invest it in a new person. See, 0:18:18.880 --> 0:18:22.560 now I found somebody else. The lessons that Brian taught me, 0:18:22.680 --> 0:18:26.040 I get to invest because I didn't look at everything 0:18:26.760 --> 0:18:30.359 the way Brian looked at everything. Some stuff, you know, 0:18:30.560 --> 0:18:32.639 just for just for Drine, I just I was just 0:18:32.880 --> 0:18:38.200 selfish by some things. For Brian, part was quit being 0:18:38.280 --> 0:18:41.639 self That was his response, quip, being selfish, don't this 0:18:41.680 --> 0:18:44.200 is what you do? This is it? Is it? Hey man? 0:18:44.320 --> 0:18:47.439 Look at this. I was like, hey man, you're right 0:18:48.240 --> 0:18:51.800 because when you start this journey out, you're selfish because 0:18:51.880 --> 0:18:55.639 you only had you um and you started this journey 0:18:55.640 --> 0:18:58.240 over twenty years ago. Yeah, I started this journey out. 0:18:58.280 --> 0:19:02.480 We're just looking for how I can be one thing 0:19:04.600 --> 0:19:07.840 that don't go no different for for for actors, you 0:19:07.880 --> 0:19:11.640 don't got different for for for comedians, don't go to musicians. 0:19:12.640 --> 0:19:17.040 All of us started out as a selfish journey. That's 0:19:17.040 --> 0:19:20.280 how the journey starts. There ain't nobody to say, hey man, 0:19:20.640 --> 0:19:25.120 no matter what my family going through I must do X, 0:19:25.320 --> 0:19:28.840 Y and Z. But then you guys a body on 0:19:28.880 --> 0:19:30.960 the journey with you, and they show you that, hey, dog, 0:19:31.400 --> 0:19:33.680 you have messitioned now that it ain't about you no more. 0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:38.720 Now it's about X, Y and Z. And this is 0:19:38.760 --> 0:19:40.640 how you want to help other people. This is why 0:19:40.640 --> 0:19:42.680 you're gonna do this thing. This is why you're gonna 0:19:42.680 --> 0:19:44.679 do this, This is why you're gonna do that. And 0:19:44.720 --> 0:19:48.399 that was a constant thing for a purpose. Why I 0:19:48.440 --> 0:19:52.680 became a bitter person because I lost something that told 0:19:52.720 --> 0:19:57.440 me that it ain't about you no more. The first 0:19:57.480 --> 0:19:59.680 five years about me. I can't get that how you feel. 0:20:01.680 --> 0:20:06.120 I'm not get somewhere. I'm trying to get out of poverty. 0:20:07.400 --> 0:20:10.320 That's that's gonna see w Priorty being on your way. 0:20:10.359 --> 0:20:13.840 It's don't you damn what you're going through all out? 0:20:16.200 --> 0:20:18.760 I want altum give me out now, Hey man, you 0:20:18.800 --> 0:20:20.240 need to do you need you need to do this 0:20:20.320 --> 0:20:23.760 that Hey, hey, hey, I want out. I don't have 0:20:23.920 --> 0:20:27.520 no time for nothing. El I'm sick it is. I 0:20:27.920 --> 0:20:30.439 was sick of it. I'm sick of sleeping at wrist stops. 0:20:30.480 --> 0:20:33.000 I'm sitting driving four hundred miles for two hundred dollars 0:20:33.440 --> 0:20:37.119 then all this dome. Well what got you started and 0:20:37.240 --> 0:20:42.000 doing it? The dream? The vision? You just you already 0:20:42.040 --> 0:20:43.560 knew that. If I'm a little kid, you said, I 0:20:43.600 --> 0:20:45.399 want to be a comedian, I want to be funny, Like, 0:20:45.440 --> 0:20:48.399 how did that happen? I probably have about fourteen, about 0:20:48.400 --> 0:20:50.439 fourteen years old, and I knew this is just what 0:20:50.480 --> 0:20:52.720 I was gonna be doing. But it's one thing to say, 0:20:52.760 --> 0:20:54.639 you know what you'ven be doing, what you're gonna do, 0:20:54.680 --> 0:20:56.560 what it take to get there is a whole another. 0:20:56.960 --> 0:21:01.359 What you say. I was just talking too J about 0:21:01.400 --> 0:21:05.560 that had a dream done? You can have the dream, 0:21:04.440 --> 0:21:08.720 Come on, you can have it. So Katy, have a dream. 0:21:09.040 --> 0:21:12.600 I'm telling you. I'm like, nobody different. It's okay for 0:21:12.680 --> 0:21:15.440 God to tap you and show you exactly what you're 0:21:15.440 --> 0:21:18.560 gonna be doing. God tap me in fourteen just like this. Hey, 0:21:20.920 --> 0:21:23.040 oh God, that's what I'm doing because I love doing it. 0:21:23.119 --> 0:21:25.560 I love watching this. I'm watching depth coming jam. We're 0:21:25.560 --> 0:21:28.159 not gonna TV. He's like, you're gonna be doing I 0:21:28.240 --> 0:21:31.399 was like, oh God, that's great. What it took to 0:21:31.480 --> 0:21:33.920 get there? Hey guy, are you sure this? Mate? I 0:21:33.960 --> 0:21:38.320 don't you know, Um, can we backtracked? Because I think 0:21:38.400 --> 0:21:42.000 that being uh this person would be great for me. 0:21:42.080 --> 0:21:47.080 I think that would be uh. I go. You gotta continue, 0:21:47.400 --> 0:21:49.800 get continue to path, you gettat. You got to be 0:21:49.840 --> 0:21:52.760 on it. You gotta be on it. Why why I 0:21:52.800 --> 0:21:55.360 got to be on it? Because because you know what 0:21:55.560 --> 0:21:58.000 this ain't. I'm time to sleep at risk stop. I'm 0:21:58.000 --> 0:22:01.600 tied to uh it. But I'm I'm wait a minute, 0:22:01.600 --> 0:22:04.159 I'm sick of all this stuff because this ain't what 0:22:04.240 --> 0:22:06.359 I had playing for my life. Lord, I'm only twenty six. 0:22:06.400 --> 0:22:09.400 I'm trying to Hey, hey, trust me, It's gonna pay 0:22:09.440 --> 0:22:11.480 out in the end. You gotta keep going, well, God, 0:22:11.520 --> 0:22:13.760 to keep going parties, but you keep going with I 0:22:13.760 --> 0:22:17.000 don't really carefully. To to to be going and keep going 0:22:17.400 --> 0:22:20.240 is tough because I don't have anything to show for it. 0:22:21.280 --> 0:22:23.119 All you got is that feeling in the vision to 0:22:23.160 --> 0:22:27.359 know that it's yours and nobody can identify with that 0:22:27.480 --> 0:22:30.760 feeling that you have. But then you're you're talking about, 0:22:31.080 --> 0:22:33.720 Oh god, I'm I'm tired of doing this party, this party, 0:22:34.400 --> 0:22:38.240 this is really uh gotta lee man, I'm look God, 0:22:38.680 --> 0:22:44.359