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Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome to my favorite murder the minisode Do

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Speaker 1: you read you your stories and you will go first?

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Speaker 2: Okay, I'm not gonna give this one away.

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Speaker 3: Okay, let's see love from New Orleans, seventeen hundreds cemetery

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Speaker 3: pool lore please, Hey, Karen and Georgia. Hello from New Orleans, Louisiana.

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Speaker 3: I work as a ghost tour guide in the French Quarter.

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Speaker 3: Yes it says dream jobbi as it sounds. And in

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Speaker 3: twenty twenty four minnisodes someone wrote in about swimming in

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Speaker 3: the pool where herb Ballmouster strangled his victims, and that's

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Speaker 3: episode sixty seven. This reminded me of a creepy piece

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Speaker 3: of pool related historical lore here.

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Speaker 2: In New Orleans, New Orleans, New Orleans, New Orleans. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: In the late seventeen hundreds, New Orleans closed its first cemetery,

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Speaker 3: Saint Peter Cemetery, where the dead were actually buried underground,

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Speaker 3: as opposed to in the above ground tunbes we tend

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Speaker 3: to use today. Some of the bodies from that old

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Speaker 3: cemetery were moved by their families to tombs in the

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Speaker 3: new Saint Louis Cemetery Number one that many bodies were

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Speaker 3: forgotten or abandoned, just paved over and left there.

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Speaker 4: Ooh.

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Speaker 3: In twenty eleven, a guy who owned a condo when

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Speaker 3: the French Quarter decided to dig an in ground swimming pool.

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Speaker 2: In his courtyard.

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Speaker 3: Oh man, his condo happened to be on one of

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Speaker 3: the blocks where Saint Peter Cemetery had been, and you

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Speaker 3: guessed it. The crew started hitting bodies as they dug

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Speaker 3: fifteen bodies in fact, within a twenty.

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Speaker 2: Square foot area.

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Speaker 3: A forensic team from LSU studied the unearthed remains and

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Speaker 3: concluded that all of these people were either African American

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Speaker 3: or Indigenous, which may explain why they weren't moved to

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Speaker 3: the new cemetery. Their families probably didn't have the connections

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Speaker 3: or the money. And that's when a really cool thing happened.

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Speaker 3: The head archaeologist on the project decided to arrange a

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Speaker 3: public reburial event for these people who were left behind.

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Speaker 5: Wow.

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Speaker 3: There was a ceremony to honor the mixed heritage of

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Speaker 3: black and Native people in New Orleans. And afterwards there

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Speaker 3: was a second line parade to Saint Louis Cemetery Number one,

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Speaker 3: where the remains were reinterred on sanctified ground. The pool

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Speaker 3: was eventually completed, and I happen to know the current

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Speaker 3: owners of the condo. Have I swum in that pool?

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Speaker 3: Apps a fucking lutely many times. Everyone calls it the

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Speaker 3: Pool of Souls. Anyway, I don't know of any Poltergeist

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Speaker 3: style hauntings at the Pool of Souls, and I'd like

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Speaker 3: to think that's because all of those people have been

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Speaker 3: so kindly laid to rest on sacred ground.

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Speaker 2: We try to do right by our dad in this city. PS.

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Speaker 3: Karen, I have got to tell you the sinkhole related

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Speaker 3: pun my boyfriend recently made. We were driving through a beautiful,

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Speaker 3: dysfunctional city with his potholes the size of meteor write craters,

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Speaker 3: and we noticed a new place where the street had

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Speaker 3: caved in. My boyfriend goes, oh shit, a new sinkhole

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Speaker 3: just dropped. Get it, Yeah, just dropped. I died, Stay

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Speaker 3: sexy and love New Orleans like the goddamn magical gem

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Speaker 3: it is Ariadney, She her, Wow.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I love New Orleans and those stories. And when

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Speaker 4: you said that they gave those like the Unnamed Dead,

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Speaker 4: it's called a second line parade. Yeah, so that's the

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Speaker 4: band walking and like the whole like it's the celebration

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Speaker 4: of life type of vibe. It's amazing. The subject line

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Speaker 4: of this email is parkouring out of getting arrested for

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Speaker 4: underage drinking. Here, Karen and Georgia, you recently asked for

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Speaker 4: stories about parkouring out of trouble. Who are we?

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Speaker 5: I really love when I really.

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Speaker 4: Purposely ignore stuff so that it's just as fresh to

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Speaker 4: meuse as it is to you. And I did not read.

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Speaker 2: Read past the book.

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Speaker 4: Okay, it's so funny for us, It says, note reference

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Speaker 4: to the Roofman story in episode five point thirty six,

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Speaker 4: smart and tricky.

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Speaker 2: All makes sense.

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Speaker 5: We asked for that.

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Speaker 4: Especially ones that involve high school parties, and I immediately

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Speaker 4: knew I had a story to write. Couldn't have been

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Speaker 4: more specific with these people, And they're like, yep, we

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Speaker 4: got I got that. Finally, it says, I'm in my

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Speaker 4: thirties now, still close friends with the three girls I

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Speaker 4: went to the party with, and we still tell the

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Speaker 4: story with pride. To set the scene, I was sixteen,

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Speaker 4: Me and my three best friends went to a party

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Speaker 4: at a friend's house whose parents were out of town.

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Speaker 4: There was beer, pong and lots of underage drinking. One

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Speaker 4: of my friends decided, with the poor judgment of a teenager,

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Speaker 4: to walk to a gas station with a group of people,

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Speaker 4: and on the way there they got stopped by cops

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Speaker 4: because a neighbor had called in a complaint about the party.

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Speaker 4: While the cop worked on some paperwork in his car,

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Speaker 4: my girls somehow had the wherewithal to call me and.

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Speaker 5: Say, dude, get out of the house. The cops are

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Speaker 5: on their way there.

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Speaker 4: Nice Me and my two friends were hanging out in

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Speaker 4: the basement, and I said something to the effect of

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Speaker 4: get the fuck up, We gotta go right now. We

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Speaker 4: all ran up the stage, and just as someone was

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Speaker 4: answering the front door and cops were coming into the house,

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Speaker 4: we opened the sliding glass door to the backyard and

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Speaker 4: bolted out into the night. We were in a neighborhood

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Speaker 4: with a series of fenced yards and houses, and we

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Speaker 4: realized that if we tried to climb the fence at

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Speaker 4: that moment, we were going to get caught, so instead,

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Speaker 4: the three of us climbed up on the top of

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Speaker 4: an RV at the back of the yard. The railings

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Speaker 4: along the roof of the RV blocked the view of

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Speaker 4: our flat bodies as cops swarmed the backyard, shining their

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Speaker 4: flashlights around looking for drunk teenage nice.

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Speaker 5: They were all like sitting there.

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Speaker 4: Once the coast was finally clear, we leaped from the

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Speaker 4: top of the RV over the back fence into someone's bushes.

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Speaker 4: One of my friends caught her thigh on a piece

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Speaker 4: of the metal fence on the way down and ended

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Speaker 4: up with an eight inch gouge. Scratched up, bruised and bleeding,

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Speaker 4: but giddy about our narrow escape, we made our way

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Speaker 4: through backyards and called my friend's older sister to come

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Speaker 4: pick us up. I seriously don't know how I got

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Speaker 4: so lucky to grow up with these three amazing, badass

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Speaker 4: women who always have each other's backs through all sorts

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Speaker 4: of mischief and heartache, but their friendship means the world

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Speaker 4: to me. Female friendships truly are a magical gift in

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Speaker 4: this fucked up world. Thank you for sharing yours with

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Speaker 4: all of us. Much love, Erica, Wow, Erica beautiful, the

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Speaker 4: perfect amount of ass kissing, the perfect amount of action.

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Speaker 3: Rates yeah, exactly, a wound, all the things and we

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Speaker 3: asked for it and you get you delivered.

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Speaker 2: Yes, So thank you.

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Speaker 5: True to the word.

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Speaker 3: Basically literally, I'm not gonna give this one away. Okay,

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Speaker 3: let's see, Hey, murder fam All right, ladies, let's cut

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Speaker 3: the small talk and get right into it.

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Speaker 5: Stop being so bossy.

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Speaker 3: I wanted to share a story about how I didn't

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Speaker 3: get murdered but definitely tempted fate when I was in

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Speaker 3: my late twenties studying abroad in Italy, stranded on Easter weekend.

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Speaker 2: Weren't you just in Italy?

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Speaker 5: What's your rotten tomatoes rating on Italy?

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Speaker 2: Oh my god? How a outen tomatoes work? I think

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Speaker 2: they do a percentages one hundred percent?

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Speaker 5: Really?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was great. Love love love love it stranded

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Speaker 2: on Easter weekend.

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Speaker 5: And it's my face, not yours.

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Speaker 3: Stranded on Easter weekend in Italy. My friends and I

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Speaker 3: were desperate for a ride to our condo and what look,

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Speaker 3: someone offered us one. And then there's a catch. I'm

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Speaker 3: not going to read it to you because I don't

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Speaker 3: want to give it away. Everything shut down in Italy

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Speaker 3: for Easter, so we had to leave our villa and

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Speaker 3: entertain ourselves for the week. A little non fact about Italy,

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Speaker 3: non family members are basically kicked out to fend for themselves.

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Speaker 3: During the sacred holiday, my two friends and I decided

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Speaker 3: to head to Caprice. So we rented a tiny condo

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Speaker 3: and took the train to Sorrento to explore.

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Speaker 4: I would love to confirm that with other Italians. It's like,

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Speaker 4: is that having to everybody or is it just you guy?

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Speaker 2: They just didn't. They were like, let's go there one.

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Speaker 5: Hey, this is real sacred. How about you leave town?

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Speaker 3: Well, waiting for the bus that would take us over

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Speaker 3: the mountain to our place, we decided to do a

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Speaker 3: little shopping. As we shopped, we chatted with a shopkeeper

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Speaker 3: and mentioned our plans to head to Capri. I usually

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Speaker 3: dropped the bombshell that no buses were running all weekend

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Speaker 3: because of Easter. We fact checked this and it was true.

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Speaker 3: We quickly realized we were stranded. Then the shopkeeper generously

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Speaker 3: offered to drive us over the mountain once he got

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Speaker 3: off work. My friends and I looked at each other

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Speaker 3: and asked for some time to think about this offer.

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Speaker 3: We were well aware this is how a tragic study

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Speaker 3: of broad murder started. Well, I mean, an older man

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Speaker 3: was offering a ride to three young women out of

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Speaker 3: the kindness of his heart. Who does that and I'm

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Speaker 3: sure our parents would have been very upset to know

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Speaker 3: we were considering getting into a car with a stranger

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Speaker 3: in a foreign country. But there were no buses for

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Speaker 3: three days, so how else were we going to get

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Speaker 3: to our place? So reluctantly we agreed. We met him

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Speaker 3: outside the shop and that's when we saw it. His

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Speaker 3: blue sedan was covered in phallic etchings. Not one or

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Speaker 3: two either, but the entire car looked like it had

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Speaker 3: been a victim of a very determined, but not so

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Speaker 3: talented artist, maybe one really pissed off X. They weren't

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Speaker 3: just on in the dust either, They were scratched right

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Speaker 3: into the paint. And we're talking everywhere, all sizes, shapes

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Speaker 3: and angles.

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Speaker 5: A fucking cars, big dick car.

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Speaker 3: My friends and I exchanged questioning glances, but instead of

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Speaker 3: backing out and embarrassing him, we climbed right in.

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Speaker 2: And what's that thing you to say, fuck politeness? Well

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Speaker 2: not that day, ladies.

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Speaker 3: I ended up in the front seat because it had

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Speaker 3: been decided that I was the most badass of the

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Speaker 3: group and would be expected to protect everyone if necessary.

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Speaker 5: No pressure.

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Speaker 2: As I buckled my seatbelt and.

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Speaker 3: It says safety first, I glanced up and saw even

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Speaker 3: more questionable carvings, this time carved right into his leather dashboard.

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Speaker 3: It had to be an X, like an angry ex

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Speaker 3: who just.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, carved. I mean, but it's just you're carving dirty pictures?

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Speaker 4: What were the dashboard carvings?

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Speaker 2: Fix? It was all this? This is called?

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Speaker 3: Are those wieners etched on his car? We all made

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Speaker 3: small talk while I silently calculated just how many phallic

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Speaker 3: impressions it would take for this situation to become a

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Speaker 3: red flag. I didn't dare ask about them, because what

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Speaker 3: if it set him off? But also why wasn't he

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Speaker 3: saying anything about them? They were not subtle. We got

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Speaker 3: to the top of the mountain, he pulled over to

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Speaker 3: show us a quote gorgeous photo op overlooking the Sorrento Valley.

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Speaker 3: At that point I was convinced this was it. This

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Speaker 3: was where we were going to get thrown off a

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Speaker 3: cliff and our parents were going to be so disappointed

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Speaker 3: in us. But no, he simply snapped our picture and

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Speaker 3: we got back in the car. We made it to

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Speaker 3: our condo without incident. He even helped us get checked in,

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Speaker 3: unloaded our bags, and drove off.

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Speaker 2: What a relief.

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Speaker 3: Later, I told my uncle this story, and he explained

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Speaker 3: that sometimes people are just nice and that you must

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Speaker 3: trust them. We murderinas, No, that's not always true, but

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Speaker 3: it was true this time. Stay sexy and when in Italy,

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Speaker 3: always put the most badass friend in the front seat.

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Speaker 3: Kimberly ps. We never asked about the questionable carvings and

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Speaker 3: he never mentioned them. An hour and a half of

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Speaker 3: driving with curious doodles everywhere and not a single word

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Speaker 3: about them.

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Speaker 2: That's the weirdest fucking part right.

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Speaker 4: Well, because clearly if like if it was an ex

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Speaker 4: or some revenge, then that's one thing. But there's a

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Speaker 4: chance he could have just wanted to do it and

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Speaker 4: did it himself style.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, my husband hates this part of the story. Quote

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Speaker 3: why didn't you ask about them?

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Speaker 2: Smiley Vias.

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Speaker 4: You know, there's I remember going to a little town,

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Speaker 4: a little mountain town, and there was a bar that

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Speaker 4: was famous for being a It was like a phallic bar,

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Speaker 4: and there was all kinds of that everywhere, and that's

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Speaker 4: the reason you went and had a drink.

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Speaker 5: Because it was like the dick bar.

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Speaker 2: What's that choice?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean who knows? Yeah, Okay, Well, the subject

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Speaker 4: line of this email is trapped in a Chuck E

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Speaker 4: Cheese machine.

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Speaker 5: Why yes, I was, Oh, no, okay.

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Speaker 4: Similar, not the same in your most recent episode. There's

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Speaker 4: no beginning. It just that we go right into talking

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Speaker 4: about why somebody would be writing this in You specifically

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Speaker 4: asked for stories about being trapped in a machine at.

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Speaker 5: Chuck E Cheese.

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Speaker 2: Sure that makes sense, and I.

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Speaker 5: Just happen to have a story for that. Weirdly specific.

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Speaker 4: I grew up in Milwaukee, Wisconsin in the eighties and

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Speaker 4: Chuck E Cheese was where you went for birthday parties, playdates,

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Speaker 4: and just general merriment. This specific Chuck E Cheese was

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Speaker 4: pretty elaborate. I remember a really big ballpit next to

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Speaker 4: a big bouncy area, completely surrounded by an overhanging series.

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Speaker 5: Of fort like structures.

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Speaker 4: Of course, they all had the usual games that would

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Speaker 4: spit out tickets that you could then use for prizes

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Speaker 4: as well. I am still to this day pretty darn

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Speaker 4: good at ski ball.

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Speaker 2: Samech. I love it.

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Speaker 4: When I read that line, I was just like, George

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Speaker 4: is gonna have something to say about this, bi But

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Speaker 4: the real have you ever seen that viral video of

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Speaker 4: the little boy that just literally nails that top high

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Speaker 4: number every time.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, so crazy.

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Speaker 5: But the real treasure was the quote cheese factory. This

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Speaker 5: was a glassed in separate area that was sort of

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Speaker 5: like a maze. Do you remember this, It sounds familiar.

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Speaker 4: You started out just walking through, but it got progressively smaller, narrower,

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Speaker 4: and darker as you went to the point that it

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Speaker 4: was just a small, narrow, square tunnel wrap and what

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Speaker 4: I can only assume was the most disgusting carpet in

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Speaker 4: the world. You could only continue through by crawling on

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Speaker 4: your hands and knees. And we were small children, so

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Speaker 4: it had to be a very small tunnel. My sister

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Speaker 4: and I never once got to the end of wherever

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Speaker 4: that tunnel went, because it just got so dark and

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Speaker 4: so small that you could barely move. We tried so

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Speaker 4: many times.

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Speaker 2: I'm getting claustrophobic. This is wedding.

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Speaker 4: This is a nightmare I have where I'm like walking

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Speaker 4: down a hall, but suddenly the hall's small around me.

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Speaker 3: You know when you see those like those like drawings

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Speaker 3: of people who go into caves and can't come out again.

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Speaker 2: I just can't. I can't.

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Speaker 5: They're sending children in.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, now, they're sending children.

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Speaker 5: Now, this is what they're doing.

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Speaker 4: Okay, So we never ended up where we started, and

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Speaker 4: we never once were successfully able to get out of

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Speaker 4: the cheese factory. The exit was a slide that would

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Speaker 4: take you back outside the glass inn enclosure. We could

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Speaker 4: always see that slide, but we could never figure out

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Speaker 4: how to get there.

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Speaker 5: We always ended up banging on the glass sobbing, and

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Speaker 5: our parents had to find someone to rescue.

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Speaker 2: I've done that slide.

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Speaker 4: And then it says, every period, single period, time I

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Speaker 4: want to go up there, you.

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Speaker 3: Cry every time. I'm not coming to get kicktied that

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Speaker 3: last tunnel.

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Speaker 4: No, we know how to We're doing it together. Why

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Speaker 4: they continued to let us go back in or why

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Speaker 4: we wanted to, is beyond me. We weren't necessarily trapped

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Speaker 4: in a machine at chuck E Cheese per se, but

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Speaker 4: we sure spent a lot of time trapped in the

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Speaker 4: cheese factory here and it haunts me to this day.

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Speaker 4: I wish I knew what it was at the end

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Speaker 4: of that gross carpeted tunnel and how to really get out.

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Speaker 2: Kate, do we have a photo?

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Speaker 5: We got nothing, We got We got the photos in

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Speaker 5: our mind of that creepy little dark carpeted.

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Speaker 2: Tunnel like carpet. I can like, it's like the industrial

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Speaker 2: carpet probably.

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Speaker 4: Right, Yes, it's it's dark maroon, maybe black a little bit,

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Speaker 4: and then bright red or bright orange, right, like a

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Speaker 4: combination where you're like, why these.

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Speaker 3: Colors covers all the stain wet stains.

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Speaker 5: And they were making it sound like as they were

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Speaker 5: trying to go through other.

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Speaker 3: Kids too, It's like it's a crush situation. Yes, well

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Speaker 3: here's a nice one. My last one. Karen's voice is

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Speaker 3: literally healing. What Oh no, it just goes Karen at

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00:15:16,280 --> 00:15:22,520
Speaker 3: all hurtful and you're trying to cause problems. But I'm

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Speaker 3: reading it. Longtime listener. Anyway, I must inform you that

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Speaker 3: you have quite a grip on this. Tonight is suffering,

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Speaker 3: heart of hearing listener, here's the deal. For as long

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Speaker 3: as I can remember, I slept with a TV on

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Speaker 3: and would tell my boomer parents that the quiet is

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Speaker 3: too loud, so show to have her TV on. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I haven't used my fucking I can't meaning to use.

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00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:44,880
Speaker 3: That means I don't need them, right, if I haven't.

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Speaker 4: Used them, Oh, maybe you did, Italy heal your eyeballs

337
00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:51,600
Speaker 4: is my voice right now, healing your fish.

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Speaker 2: To hear everything now. Blah blah blah blah blah. Too loud.

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Speaker 5: Oh, they don't work.

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00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:03,560
Speaker 3: They're just very real stupid, too loud. When they complained

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Speaker 3: about the TV being you know that authority figure who

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00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:09,880
Speaker 3: speaks sternly and quietly when he's mad. That's my dad

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Speaker 3: and I when I responded with huh more than my

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Speaker 3: low speaking father appreciated, I would get in some major

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Speaker 3: trouble for quote not paying attention. Growing up, I was

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Speaker 3: always quote too loud, and we get in trouble for

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00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:25,040
Speaker 3: quote not listening. But I didn't know how to change

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Speaker 3: it and was always super embarrassed.

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Speaker 2: Teachers absolutely hated it.

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Speaker 3: But did my parents ever think any of these complaints

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00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:33,480
Speaker 3: were cause enough to take me to get a hearing

352
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Speaker 3: test for Fox's sake?

353
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:35,360
Speaker 2: Of course not.

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00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:39,360
Speaker 3: They're boomers and I quote just wasn't paying attention and

355
00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:40,400
Speaker 3: needed to be quieter.

356
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Speaker 2: Yeah, I am.

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Speaker 5: I hear, which is the thing children cannot do right, cannot.

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Speaker 2: It's not part of their the thing they come you know.

359
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:50,160
Speaker 3: At the age of thirty one, I suffered an extreme

360
00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:53,880
Speaker 3: double ear infection that resulted in multiple CT scans to

361
00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:57,560
Speaker 3: watch out for meningitis. The infection was very intense and

362
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,320
Speaker 3: even resulted in short.

363
00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:01,960
Speaker 2: Term memory life. Oh shit, yeah, it's fucked up.

364
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:05,520
Speaker 3: I thankfully walked away with a physically trauma free brain.

365
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:09,000
Speaker 3: But the ringing, oh my god, the ringing was so loud.

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Speaker 2: Do you have tonight?

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00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:09,920
Speaker 4: This?

368
00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:12,480
Speaker 2: I don't, Vince has it? It sounds terrible.

369
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:16,359
Speaker 3: I sincerely thought I was going to go crazy. No

370
00:17:16,520 --> 00:17:19,520
Speaker 3: sound was present enough to drown it out. I visited

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00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:22,320
Speaker 3: an antea and he suggested that I quote learn coping

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00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:26,080
Speaker 3: mechanisms to alleviate the condition. Then took only a quick

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00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:28,920
Speaker 3: peek in my ears. I said, fuck these local doctors

374
00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:33,240
Speaker 3: and delegated this job to someone outside my small corner

375
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Speaker 3: of southwest Michigan. And then it says, go lie ins Vince.

376
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:41,119
Speaker 3: This new doctor did a thorough exam and a hearing

377
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:44,000
Speaker 3: test and all caps. It turns out I was born

378
00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:48,480
Speaker 3: a little bit deaf and can't register low tones thirty.

379
00:17:48,119 --> 00:17:51,200
Speaker 2: One as much, she found out. Damn it, you bet.

380
00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:52,800
Speaker 3: The first thing I did on the drive home was

381
00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:56,000
Speaker 3: call my dad demand an apology for all those years

382
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Speaker 3: of hounding.

383
00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:58,080
Speaker 2: Did I receive one?

384
00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:01,160
Speaker 3: He only giggled, the doctor referred me to get hearing

385
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,960
Speaker 3: aids that amplify lower tones and provide a constant little

386
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:07,960
Speaker 3: sh sound in the background, which completely dissolves the ringing.

387
00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:08,480
Speaker 4: God.

388
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,520
Speaker 3: The aids also connect to my phone and I can

389
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Speaker 3: listen to my favorite podcasts without anyone knowing.

390
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:15,600
Speaker 2: Wink, you're just in a meeting.

391
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:19,080
Speaker 4: You're you're just like, yeah, doing a lot of nodding

392
00:18:19,119 --> 00:18:19,760
Speaker 4: at the wrong time.

393
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,320
Speaker 3: I cannot sleep without the hearing aids. And this is

394
00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:25,240
Speaker 3: where miskill Garup comes into play. Do You Need to

395
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:28,600
Speaker 3: Ride and MFM have been my quote falling asleep podcast

396
00:18:28,680 --> 00:18:31,399
Speaker 3: for years before my E and T appointments, and have

397
00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:34,320
Speaker 3: continued to be in the years after. There's something about

398
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:37,240
Speaker 3: Karen's voice that hits the right note to drown out

399
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:40,200
Speaker 3: the nighttime ringing and lulls me right to sleep.

400
00:18:40,359 --> 00:18:42,040
Speaker 5: I don't think that's true.

401
00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:47,800
Speaker 3: Uh, I me using that. Don't worry about my mental health.

402
00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:50,959
Speaker 3: I stack my CUE with podcasts like Sleepy History and

403
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:52,240
Speaker 3: Lights Out Library.

404
00:18:52,440 --> 00:18:53,800
Speaker 5: I list the Lights Out Library.

405
00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:54,520
Speaker 2: Yes, I do.

406
00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:00,920
Speaker 3: I need it for when I'm asleep. I'll be totally fine.

407
00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:03,919
Speaker 3: All this to say, hearing aids are just glasses for

408
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,280
Speaker 3: your ears. No one should be ashamed to get them

409
00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:09,000
Speaker 3: because quote, they're too young. I've heard so much of

410
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:12,520
Speaker 3: this since getting them. Insurance did not take promo code

411
00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:13,800
Speaker 3: murder to help cover.

412
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:16,040
Speaker 2: The cost of the hearing aids.

413
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:19,120
Speaker 3: And the third one is Karen's voice is literally healing.

414
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,840
Speaker 2: Stay sex. You look so mad about this. It's sweet.

415
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:23,840
Speaker 5: It's embarrassing.

416
00:19:24,119 --> 00:19:28,520
Speaker 2: Sorry, stay sexy and pay attention. Okay, she her.

417
00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:32,879
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm honored, and god damn, I'm sorry that you,

418
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:35,320
Speaker 4: like tonight is in that ringing and that idea that

419
00:19:35,359 --> 00:19:36,280
Speaker 4: you just had to deal with.

420
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,560
Speaker 2: That ferdy And they're like, well, get used to it.

421
00:19:39,119 --> 00:19:41,199
Speaker 4: Just as someone who like has seizures, when you have

422
00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:44,080
Speaker 4: a thing that's wrong with just inside your head, and like,

423
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,560
Speaker 4: it's not like someone can be like you're poor broken arm, yeah,

424
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,359
Speaker 4: which is a blood testing Yeah yeah. It's just that's

425
00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:53,000
Speaker 4: so frustrating and so like. And it's also funny because

426
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:57,359
Speaker 4: I wonder if having a dad who is technically also

427
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,360
Speaker 4: kind of deaf or at least very hard of hearing,

428
00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:02,040
Speaker 4: right because you did the belt yeah.

429
00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:03,320
Speaker 2: Oh right, because of the fucking firehouse.

430
00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:06,160
Speaker 4: The firehouse and the alarms made all of those guys,

431
00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:10,280
Speaker 4: that generation of firemen completely deaf right, so alarms on

432
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:13,840
Speaker 4: the yeah in that when they'd all go off, when

433
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:18,320
Speaker 4: they'd be asleep. Yeah, that was like beyond not good

434
00:20:18,359 --> 00:20:21,760
Speaker 4: for your ears. So yeah, so we have to modulate

435
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:24,560
Speaker 4: our voice where we're yelling at my dad, but in the.

436
00:20:24,480 --> 00:20:25,920
Speaker 5: Lowest register possible.

437
00:20:26,119 --> 00:20:26,600
Speaker 2: Jesus.

438
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:28,840
Speaker 4: So, I think I've always had a I've always And

439
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:31,080
Speaker 4: also the first time I saw Janine Garofflow do stand

440
00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:32,960
Speaker 4: up comedy, I was like, I want to do have

441
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,240
Speaker 4: a deep voice when I do stand up comedy because

442
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:36,760
Speaker 4: I kind of was like, I'm here like this and

443
00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:38,640
Speaker 4: I was like, no, I'm going to talk as low

444
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:39,280
Speaker 4: as I can.

445
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:42,520
Speaker 2: And now people fall asleep to that. Thanks to Janine.

446
00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:45,240
Speaker 4: Groffel, the dulcet Tones, Thanks to my deaf father and

447
00:20:45,359 --> 00:20:46,200
Speaker 4: Jeane Garoflow.

448
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:47,760
Speaker 5: This is the product you got?

449
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:51,719
Speaker 2: But do you have one moren't?

450
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:52,680
Speaker 4: Yes?

451
00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:54,040
Speaker 2: Okay?

452
00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:57,199
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, this is great. The subject line of this

453
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:58,159
Speaker 5: email thank you.

454
00:20:58,400 --> 00:20:58,960
Speaker 4: The name.

455
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 5: Just k oh. What if I wrote it about myself?

456
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:09,120
Speaker 3: Do you know his voice like Gride my band all

457
00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:10,879
Speaker 3: I listened to library?

458
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:12,200
Speaker 2: Okay?

459
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,320
Speaker 4: The subject line of this email is inappropriate and probably

460
00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 4: illegal kid jobs. Ay ahoy. Here is my story of

461
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:24,760
Speaker 4: inappropriate kid jobs I gave myself. I also, for the record,

462
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:28,200
Speaker 4: baby sat five children under the age of eight, including

463
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:31,280
Speaker 4: an infant when I was ten. Dude, gen X was

464
00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:34,320
Speaker 4: no joke. In third grade, I was living with my

465
00:21:34,359 --> 00:21:40,679
Speaker 4: great grandparents, largely unsupervised, completely undiagnosed ADHD, fiercely overachieving, and

466
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:45,280
Speaker 4: just a deeply weird kid and then in parentheses, still weird.

467
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:49,800
Speaker 4: No regrets. That's right, Yeah, that's please be either I

468
00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:52,200
Speaker 4: was going to end up in federal prison or running

469
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 4: my own company.

470
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:55,040
Speaker 2: Same my.

471
00:21:57,119 --> 00:21:59,880
Speaker 5: Friend, we're all looking in the mirror.

472
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:01,320
Speaker 4: At each other that we're all Spider Man pointing at

473
00:22:01,359 --> 00:22:04,439
Speaker 4: each other. But luckily, because I am introverted and like

474
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:08,240
Speaker 4: my space, I chose the latter. My entrepreneurial journey began

475
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:10,359
Speaker 4: at a friend's house. When I hit the jackpot, I

476
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:14,000
Speaker 4: found the dirtiest, most scandalous publication my young eyes had

477
00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:17,399
Speaker 4: ever beheld, of Frederick's of Hollywood Catalog.

478
00:22:18,119 --> 00:22:20,280
Speaker 2: I was obsessed with that as a kid.

479
00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:22,760
Speaker 5: It was the dirtiest thing, you know what.

480
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:26,840
Speaker 3: I wanted, the full body like like fishnet lace suit,

481
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:30,720
Speaker 3: like it going to your ankles, into your what are

482
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:32,400
Speaker 3: these wrists?

483
00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:33,080
Speaker 2: Enough to hear?

484
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:36,119
Speaker 3: But it was like see through and lace, and I

485
00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:38,240
Speaker 3: was like, that's when I'm on adult That's going to

486
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:39,720
Speaker 3: be the sexiest thing that ever happened to me.

487
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:42,320
Speaker 4: I feel like in that catalog they were drawings, right,

488
00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:44,440
Speaker 4: wasn't it like really cool cartoon women.

489
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:46,840
Speaker 3: I don't remember that at all, maybe like in when

490
00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:49,200
Speaker 3: I was like probably the nineties when I was looking

491
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:50,000
Speaker 3: at it, early nineties.

492
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:51,959
Speaker 5: Oh, I was looking at it in eighteen hundreds.

493
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:58,600
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, it says naturally they saw this Frederick's of

494
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:02,440
Speaker 4: Hollywood catalog get their friends house, and so they say naturally.

495
00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:04,200
Speaker 5: I took it with zero remorse.

496
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:08,040
Speaker 4: I saw an underserved demographic of neighborhood boys, and I

497
00:23:08,080 --> 00:23:10,639
Speaker 4: instantly launched a tiered subscription service.

498
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:12,280
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.

499
00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 4: Fucking genius. So the first tier of the subscription service

500
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:19,160
Speaker 4: is Bear Essentials and it's twenty five cents and it's

501
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:22,439
Speaker 4: a standard glance at bras and underwear. Then the second

502
00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:25,160
Speaker 4: tier is Cheeky Business, which is fifty cents. I'm one

503
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:25,399
Speaker 4: of the.

504
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,040
Speaker 2: Most brilliant kid in the world.

505
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:32,640
Speaker 4: Is happening, And cheeky business is high cleavage or a thong. Wow, Now,

506
00:23:32,680 --> 00:23:36,080
Speaker 4: looking back, did I lead some young boys astray? Maybe,

507
00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 4: But like any good CEO, I didn't care, and more importantly,

508
00:23:39,640 --> 00:23:42,520
Speaker 4: I knew I couldn't rely on a single revenue stream.

509
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:46,679
Speaker 4: I channeled my illicit money into a second venture, establishing

510
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:48,400
Speaker 4: a schoolyard candy cartel.

511
00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:49,840
Speaker 5: This is fucking major.

512
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:52,280
Speaker 4: I'd buy a pack of Now and Laters for a

513
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:55,359
Speaker 4: quarter and flip the individual squares for twenty five cents each.

514
00:23:56,560 --> 00:24:00,119
Speaker 4: Come on, I was basically the Pablo Escobar of cavity.

515
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:04,840
Speaker 4: The lingerie division was eventually shut down when a teacher

516
00:24:06,240 --> 00:24:09,320
Speaker 4: so good, so smart. The lingerie division was eventually shut

517
00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:11,840
Speaker 4: down when a teacher noticed a suspicious queue of boys

518
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:14,480
Speaker 4: forming around me. My poor father had to sit in

519
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:17,199
Speaker 4: the principal's office, not the first or last time, by

520
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:19,880
Speaker 4: the way, and listened to a tale of his wayward

521
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:22,640
Speaker 4: daughter's adult undergarment subscription ring.

522
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,399
Speaker 2: I mean he had to be a little proud.

523
00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:27,240
Speaker 5: It had to be. I got grounded. Obviously.

524
00:24:27,400 --> 00:24:31,000
Speaker 4: They took away my intellivision. Do you remember in television now?

525
00:24:31,119 --> 00:24:31,920
Speaker 2: Yeah? What is that?

526
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:35,080
Speaker 4: It was kind of like early Atari, Oh my god,

527
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:36,880
Speaker 4: which I found deeply unfair.

528
00:24:37,119 --> 00:24:39,040
Speaker 5: It's not my fault. I knew my audience.

529
00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:43,120
Speaker 4: However, the candy operation completely survived the crackdown. I ran

530
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:47,520
Speaker 4: that operation straight through sixth grade until I was finally busted.

531
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,680
Speaker 4: But I had bought an amazing Cassio keyboard.

532
00:24:50,800 --> 00:24:52,320
Speaker 5: Wow, totally worth it.

533
00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 4: Unsurprisingly, I've now been a legitimate, successful, and happily self

534
00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:59,920
Speaker 4: employed business owner for twenty two years. The hustle started early,

535
00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:03,359
Speaker 4: and I can't recommend it enough. Stay sexy and be

536
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,800
Speaker 4: your own boss. And it's just the initials.

537
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:10,359
Speaker 3: PCP is so smart because it's the teared part that

538
00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:12,560
Speaker 3: makes me go, that's a smart I would never think

539
00:25:12,600 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 3: of that.

540
00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, the teared part is brilliant.

541
00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 5: Yeah you could have this? Yeah, sure, yeah, find it.

542
00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:21,600
Speaker 4: Steal another quarter out of your dad's bowl on his

543
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:23,919
Speaker 4: dresser and you can see some cheeks.

544
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,200
Speaker 2: Amazing. Tell us how laric started.

545
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 3: You became the person you are today by doing fucked

546
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:31,080
Speaker 3: up things as a child.

547
00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:33,960
Speaker 2: Yep, at my favorite murder at Gmail.

548
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:36,639
Speaker 5: Get it off your chest on this podcast. We love it.

549
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:40,280
Speaker 3: This is the place to tell everyone we're all with you. Yeah,

550
00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:42,440
Speaker 3: and we love you and we appreciate you, and thank

551
00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:45,080
Speaker 3: you for listening. And stay sexy, don't get murdered.

552
00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:48,560
Speaker 2: Good bye, Elvis. Do you want a cookie?

553
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:57,920
Speaker 5: This has been an exactly right production.

554
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,760
Speaker 3: Our senior producer is Molly Smith and our socio producer

555
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:01,520
Speaker 3: is Tessa Hughes.

556
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:03,560
Speaker 5: Our editor is Aristotle Ascevedo.

557
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,800
Speaker 2: This episode was mixed by Leona Squalacci.

558
00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:08,720
Speaker 4: Email your hometowns to My Favorite Murder at gmail dot com.

559
00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:10,920
Speaker 3: Follow the show on Instagram at my Favorite Murder.

560
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 4: Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple

561
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:15,840
Speaker 4: Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

562
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,040
Speaker 2: And now you can watch My Favorite Murder on Netflix.

563
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 4: And when you're there, hit the double thumbs up and

564
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,480
Speaker 4: the remind Me buttons. That's the best way you can

565
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:23,320
Speaker 4: support our show.

566
00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:24,600
Speaker 2: Goodbye,