Speaker 1: Hi everyone, I'm Katie Couric and this is next Question.
Speaker 1: We're doing something a little bit different this week, something
Speaker 1: that I'm going to try throughout this season of the podcast,
Speaker 1: and that is to do a Katie plus one episode.
Speaker 1: I am so lucky. I know so many great people.
Speaker 1: They're interesting, they're fun to talk to, they're special to me,
Speaker 1: and I thought, wouldn't it be fun to invite people
Speaker 1: to join me and be my little partner in crime
Speaker 1: on this podcast. So we're doing it today with my
Speaker 1: friend Kelly Rizzo and Hi Kelly.
Speaker 2: Hi Katie.
Speaker 3: I'm so honored to be a or plus one and
Speaker 3: be your partner in crime. And for the first time
Speaker 3: me being your partner in crime doesn't involve cocktails or cooking.
Speaker 4: That's true. That's true, just talk.
Speaker 1: And I thought maybe we could tell everyone listening Kelly,
Speaker 1: how we know each other and we actually haven't been
Speaker 1: friends for all that long. I mean, you're a new friend,
Speaker 1: which I think is so important and that's something I
Speaker 1: love to do. You know that Girl Scout song make
Speaker 1: New Friends? The kiel one is silver and the uh
Speaker 1: now it's around actually, but we're not going to subject
Speaker 1: our listeners to that.
Speaker 3: It has been a little over a year and a
Speaker 3: half that we've been friends. We met right after my
Speaker 3: husband Bob passed away, because you had reached out through
Speaker 3: a mutual friend, because you had gone through that same
Speaker 3: loss about twenty something years earlier.
Speaker 4: Twenty four years early, yes, exactly.
Speaker 3: You were about the same age that I was when
Speaker 3: this happened, so you know what it feels like to
Speaker 3: have gone through a loss at that time, and you
Speaker 3: reached out, just kind of offering a friendly ear and
Speaker 3: a friendly hand, and you're like, I'm here if you
Speaker 3: want to talk, And of course I took her up
Speaker 3: on that head.
Speaker 1: I just remember thinking when I was reading about what
Speaker 1: happened to Bob, who I always really liked. Actually, I
Speaker 1: had a date with him once, as you know, I.
Speaker 4: Really liked him.
Speaker 1: I found him so cute and funny and amusing, and
Speaker 1: I did think we shared a pretty nice kiss in
Speaker 1: the foyer of my apartment.
Speaker 2: But he always thought you were lovely.
Speaker 4: What can I say?
Speaker 2: He was a big fan.
Speaker 4: He adored you, well, not enough to call me again, but.
Speaker 1: That's okay, that's okay, because it all worked out. It
Speaker 1: all worked out. He found the love of his life
Speaker 1: with you. Oh, okay, And I remember thinking, gosh, Kelly,
Speaker 1: I remember those strange, surreal days following Jay's death. I thought,
Speaker 1: I know a little bit what Kelly's feeling right now.
Speaker 1: I'm just going to say, hey, if you need me,
Speaker 1: I'm here. We had dinner and then we've just stayed
Speaker 1: in touch because I've also been very excited about your
Speaker 1: career and what's ahead for you and tried to tried
Speaker 1: to give you some advice in that department.
Speaker 4: So I'm just thrilled.
Speaker 3: There's no better mentor to have than you well, and
Speaker 3: I've been so grateful a for your friendship, B for
Speaker 3: your guidance on the personal level, but then see for
Speaker 3: your guidance and mentorship on the career side of things.
Speaker 3: And I'm just I mean, when Katie Kurk calls you
Speaker 3: and says, hey, do you want to do an interview
Speaker 3: with me, you say yes, And especially when it's such
Speaker 3: a dear friend of mine as well, which I'm excited about.
Speaker 1: That's one of the reasons I thought this would be
Speaker 1: very good chemistry. And it was serendipitous that my guest
Speaker 1: today is someone who you know well. I always say
Speaker 1: when people say that instead of who for a person.
Speaker 1: People make that mistake a lot, by the way, and
Speaker 1: that is John Stamos, Katie.
Speaker 5: If you and I went out instead of you and Bob,
Speaker 5: we'd probably still be dating.
Speaker 4: I just, oh, quit it some more, John, quit it
Speaker 4: some more.
Speaker 5: Out of me Cooier Saggitt. He could have started with me.
Speaker 1: Well, you didn't ask John, and I think I don't
Speaker 1: think you were available at the time.
Speaker 5: Did Bob ask you out?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: They were out on a date. He asked her out.
Speaker 4: Isn't that funny?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I remember, and we talked about it. I think
Speaker 5: he was intimidated by you.
Speaker 4: Please.
Speaker 5: He was not really good. I used to have to
Speaker 5: to see he or know him, like I would tell
Speaker 5: him what the text and what to say, what to
Speaker 5: do on these dates, and I, god, I wish maybe
Speaker 5: I should have gone back to my text and see
Speaker 5: because I feel like I was. I was texting him,
Speaker 5: don't blow out X smarter on Katie. She's a very
Speaker 5: intelligent woman. She's not just beautiful. Be careful, Bob, and
Speaker 5: you know and yeah, and you guys kissed she.
Speaker 4: Did, and as Kelly knows, he was a good kisser.
Speaker 6: Oh, I know sheosed him and you know, you guys
Speaker 6: had a some cuddles that you've you've cuddled on camera
Speaker 6: and off probably, and you guys joke, you even joke
Speaker 6: in your book that you've shared a.
Speaker 2: Bed with him on multiple occasions.
Speaker 5: We were like old married couple. We didn't have sex,
Speaker 5: and we argued about that. That's funny, John, that is well,
Speaker 5: you know I learned from Bob. Thank you for having
Speaker 5: me on this and what a great idea. But isn't
Speaker 5: it called Katie plus one? Like don't you always have to.
Speaker 1: Say the name of the podcast is next question? And
Speaker 1: some conversations, honestly, John, lend themselves to sort of a
Speaker 1: single person doing an interview, and some are much better
Speaker 1: for when there's a connection or someone is passionate about
Speaker 1: a topic. So this is really an experiment, and Kelly
Speaker 1: is my first person to do this with. And anyway,
Speaker 1: when I was going to be in La visiting my
Speaker 1: daughter and I know you both live in La, I thought, Wow,
Speaker 1: this will be a great opportunity because I'm excited to
Speaker 1: talk to you about your book and your life. And
Speaker 1: I know what a big deal this is, John, because
Speaker 1: I wrote a memoir that came out gosh, now about
Speaker 1: two years ago.
Speaker 4: I can't believe it, and it.
Speaker 1: Was a very stressful time because you do open up
Speaker 1: your heart and kind of spell your guts on the page,
Speaker 1: and it's scary, right.
Speaker 5: It was the last thing on my mind. I never
Speaker 5: thought about writing a book. It wasn't a goal of mine.
Speaker 5: I didn't think I could do it. Certainly, in my
Speaker 5: juvenile thinking, I thought, well, all people would care about
Speaker 5: is you know, talking about who I slept with. And
Speaker 5: I'm not going to say that because it's not that
Speaker 5: many anyway, but you know, so I just I'm never
Speaker 5: going to write a book, and I'd never found my
Speaker 5: I just didn't think it was something that I would
Speaker 5: ever do. And then you know, I became a father
Speaker 5: and that kind of you know, maybe you know, people
Speaker 5: were asking that I was now don't know. Then you know,
Speaker 5: then Bob died and I sat down to write that
Speaker 5: obituary type thing in the La Times, and I just
Speaker 5: kind of just poured out of me. And I think
Speaker 5: the agents saw that and they said, oh, hey, you
Speaker 5: should write a book. I'm like, now, yes, it was
Speaker 5: very good writing in that, and I still said no
Speaker 5: for a long time, and I just couldn't figure out
Speaker 5: I didn't want to. I didn't think I and I
Speaker 5: didn't know how. I didn't know where to start. And
Speaker 5: then I remembered my mom's letters that she wrote me,
Speaker 5: and she wrote these beautiful notes that we've kept over
Speaker 5: the years, and I kind of put them together. I say, Okay,
Speaker 5: this is a good starting point. But then I wanted
Speaker 5: to write a love letter to all the people that
Speaker 5: have been so beautiful in my life, certainly Bob. I mean,
Speaker 5: Bob is a through line through the whole, you know,
Speaker 5: I start with I decided to write I don't know
Speaker 5: where you started in your book, but I started the
Speaker 5: two hardest things that I could write about. One was
Speaker 5: this horrific day I was going to meet Bob at
Speaker 5: the palm and I got a dui and you know,
Speaker 5: it was the lowest point in my life. And my
Speaker 5: five stages of grief then were you know, sex and
Speaker 5: more booze, and it was terrible. And then this second
Speaker 5: chapter that I wrote was the final one, the day
Speaker 5: I found out that Bob died, and I sort of
Speaker 5: go through it pretty meticulously, right Kelly, and and my
Speaker 5: five stages of brief there were of therapy and family
Speaker 5: and health, and then I just had to feel in
Speaker 5: the rest of it. But Bob was certainly I don't
Speaker 5: know if I don't know he was interesting. I was
Speaker 5: just thinking, I don't know if I would have wrote this,
Speaker 5: because a lot of times when I was writing about
Speaker 5: Bob was like, ooh, he if he was a lie?
Speaker 5: Would he? I don't think I would have written this
Speaker 5: book if if he was still around.
Speaker 1: Wow, I mean clearly, I think a life event like
Speaker 1: that has such a profound impact and reminds you of
Speaker 1: your mortality.
Speaker 5: And yeah, you know you lost your husband. When is that?
Speaker 1: It was in nineteen ninety eight, believe it or not.
Speaker 1: So it has been dush twenty five years now, right,
Speaker 1: And what.
Speaker 5: Does that feel like? Is it like the more time
Speaker 5: that goes by, the less you feel it. And that
Speaker 5: feels shitty.
Speaker 1: Too, right, it does actually, But I mean Kelly and
Speaker 1: I had a long conversation about that for her podcast.
Speaker 1: And you know, I always think if something were to
Speaker 1: happen to me, I wouldn't want the people I left behind.
Speaker 1: I'd want them to be sad for a little while.
Speaker 1: I'd want them to be very, very very sad, But
Speaker 1: I wouldn't want that sadness to overcome them and be
Speaker 1: a through line through the rest of their lives. As
Speaker 1: much as you know, I'd want them to think about me,
Speaker 1: But you want you want people to be as joyful
Speaker 1: and feel good. You don't want people to feel terrible.
Speaker 1: And Kelly's very much that attitude.
Speaker 5: I know Kelly struggled. Didn't you struggle with that? Kelly? Yeah,
Speaker 5: you started to feel sort of good and have a
Speaker 5: nice half a day and then you feel guilty. Right, Well,
Speaker 5: if mom would be mad, he would be mad.
Speaker 3: But at this point, well that's what I'm saying, John,
Speaker 3: Like you know, better than anybody, I've had to differentiate
Speaker 3: between earthly Bob and heavenly Bob. Heavenly Bob, of course
Speaker 3: would want me to be happy and would want me
Speaker 3: to enjoy life and to.
Speaker 4: Maybe meet for someone, right.
Speaker 3: But Earthly Bob absolutely not. Earthly Bob would be like,
Speaker 3: how dare you? How could you you're smiling? Oh, so
Speaker 3: you didn't love me at all? Right, I knew it,
Speaker 3: you know, Like that's how earthly Bob would be, And
Speaker 3: so you have to separate them, you know, and you
Speaker 3: know that better than anybody. John, Like how he would
Speaker 3: have been if he could talk about his own death,
Speaker 3: but he never wanted to talk about it because he
Speaker 3: said he was going to live forever.
Speaker 5: All right. You called me yesterday crying and it was
Speaker 5: a you know, I started crying. But what you said
Speaker 5: was that that the people that didn't know Bob, when
Speaker 5: they read your book, they'll they'll know the real Bob.
Speaker 5: And that meant so much to me because I've just
Speaker 5: been struggling with not having him around and and as
Speaker 5: I know you are, but writing the book was it
Speaker 5: was my way of getting, you know, being close to
Speaker 5: him again and hopefully, and I feel that phone call
Speaker 5: made me because I just wanted him to be proud
Speaker 5: of the of the way I wrote about him, and
Speaker 5: you know, you said he would be, so that was
Speaker 5: all I needed here.
Speaker 3: Not only would he be proud, I mean I was
Speaker 3: just so touched and blown away by how you portrayed
Speaker 3: and depicted your relationship with him. You said things about
Speaker 3: me and there that like I didn't even know or
Speaker 3: that I had forgotten. And there were so many parts
Speaker 3: of this book that I mean, even myself, as your friend,
Speaker 3: somebody who knows you very well like I did, I
Speaker 3: didn't know and it's such like what, oh, my gosh,
Speaker 3: just even stories, stories about Bob, because keep in mind,
Speaker 3: I had only heard Bob's perspective on a lot of things,
Speaker 3: and you know, and we'll get to this, but you know,
Speaker 3: your relationship with him, even when you guys first started
Speaker 3: doing Full House together, I had I knew that you
Speaker 3: guys weren't besties from day one, but you know, I
Speaker 3: only heard Bob's side of the story. So it was
Speaker 3: very interesting to get your side of the story.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it was, you know, the two hardest I thought
Speaker 5: that the writing the chapter about Bob or the opening
Speaker 5: chapter was gonna be the harst the hardest chapter. Two
Speaker 5: chapters really that were the Full House ones because I didn't,
Speaker 5: you know, I know how important the show was to people,
Speaker 5: and people ask if. Jeff Franklin was over here the
Speaker 5: other day and he's writing a book, and he was
Speaker 5: asking me like, when did I come to terms with
Speaker 5: the fact that you know Full House? And when did
Speaker 5: I like it? When do I accept it? And the
Speaker 5: truth is not until, really, honestly to myself, until I
Speaker 5: wrote this book, until I put down on paper what
Speaker 5: that show meant to people, how much it influenced the life,
Speaker 5: and how it was everybody's family. It wasn't just you know,
Speaker 5: the last key kid coming home. It was her family
Speaker 5: and the widow who turns it up a little louder,
Speaker 5: it was his family. And you know, it's become you know,
Speaker 5: the new normal, unconventional family. And the central character on
Speaker 5: that show was love and it was representing the best
Speaker 5: of who we could be. And the critics used to
Speaker 5: just drive me nuts, and I finally just let all
Speaker 5: that go writing this book and said, this show wasn't
Speaker 5: meant for you, guys, You're not smarter than me. I
Speaker 5: get it. It was fast at times, it was silly, it
Speaker 5: was big, But what you would you missed is right
Speaker 5: under that when you put gave you a chance to
Speaker 5: the brain goes to the side and lets the heart feel.
Speaker 5: And that's what you intellectual dummies didn't get that I
Speaker 5: got and the rest of the world got too. So
Speaker 5: we weren't making it for you, but just digging at it,
Speaker 5: writing it down and then talking about the relationship with Bob.
Speaker 5: I mean it did start off rough. I came from,
Speaker 5: you know, a sitcom with Jack Clug and who was
Speaker 5: you know, one of the great television actors, and Gary
Speaker 5: Marshall was on that show and all these brilliant comics,
Speaker 5: and every scene that we approached was from the story
Speaker 5: and character and why I would say this, and that's
Speaker 5: the way I went into full house. Well, Bob certainly
Speaker 5: didn't work that way. Bob, as Kelly could attest, was
Speaker 5: a laugh junkie. He was addicted to getting laughs and
Speaker 5: if he couldn't get him from where he's you know,
Speaker 5: in the show, it was like going down to skid
Speaker 5: row and getting them. He would make the crew. He
Speaker 5: would just go for the lowest you know, not the crew,
Speaker 5: but the type of comedy to make them laugh. And
Speaker 5: it was it was intrusive to my process. So then
Speaker 5: just trying to figure out, like when did we click,
Speaker 5: and it really wasn't until his sister got scalaraderma and
Speaker 5: Dave's sister had a terrible cancer. Then they found a
Speaker 5: brain tumor and my sister, so the three of us
Speaker 5: were not just sitcom guys that working together. We were
Speaker 5: three brothers that were losing their sisters. And that's when
Speaker 5: we really I think connected.
Speaker 1: It's been incredibly gosh. I mean, obviously I know Bob's
Speaker 1: story well about his sister, and I've gone to events
Speaker 1: for this scleeroderma foundation, but for Dave to have his
Speaker 1: sister sick and you John, I know she was later
Speaker 1: diagnosed with MS and it didn't turn out to be
Speaker 1: a brain tumor after all, but to have those life
Speaker 1: and death situations, that must have been an incredibly bonding
Speaker 1: experience for the three of you. And it was that
Speaker 1: the moment everything changed.
Speaker 5: I think. So it sort of just said, what are
Speaker 5: we doing. Let's put aside our petty bullshit, let's learn
Speaker 5: from each other, Let's all come a little closer to
Speaker 5: your process you come to mind. And we did that.
Speaker 5: And you know what else was interesting just thinking it through,
Speaker 5: is that my sister made it, like you said, and
Speaker 5: there's didn't. So that that was I felt guilt about
Speaker 5: that too. It was strange, but we just continued to
Speaker 5: build our love for each other. And you know, thinking
Speaker 5: about that last dinner, Kelly, I mean, Bob was it
Speaker 5: was just you know, it was everything you wan wanted
Speaker 5: in Bob that night. He was just at his to
Speaker 5: me anyway, it was his best and little things that
Speaker 5: normally bothered me about him didn't because I too was coming,
Speaker 5: you know, was starting to come around to be like,
Speaker 5: you know, not to be such an asshole, and you
Speaker 5: know it was. And then he wrote this beautiful thing
Speaker 5: and you know Instagram, and you don't think of the
Speaker 5: last time you take a picture like that, to be there,
Speaker 5: last time with somebody.
Speaker 1: Set the scene for me. John and Kelly, you guys
Speaker 1: run a double date. You were at Noboo in Malibu, right,
Speaker 1: and Kelly, do you remember that night being as magical
Speaker 1: as John does?
Speaker 2: I do?
Speaker 3: And but I'll I'm going to backtrack even one more second,
Speaker 3: because John, this is something that now literally this just
Speaker 3: popped in my head. You had said how he was
Speaker 3: at his best and you were at your best. But
Speaker 3: I'm thinking back to even maybe just like a month
Speaker 3: before that is when you guys, remember you had that
Speaker 3: work trip I think to Florida and you guys were
Speaker 3: bickering like the old married couple the whole time. And
Speaker 3: I remember Bob came alone and he was like, oh,
Speaker 3: we were driving each other nuts. John was mean to me,
Speaker 3: and then I'm sure I was mean to him. And
Speaker 3: you know, you guys were bickering, bickering, bickering, and then
Speaker 3: we had this dinner that was the complete and total
Speaker 3: like resolution from that and so there was none of
Speaker 3: that you guys, you know. I mean, I've been at
Speaker 3: many dinners with you guys where even you'll you'll bicker
Speaker 3: like the old married couple, and you guys were just
Speaker 3: having the best time. And we truly did have this wonderful,
Speaker 3: wonderful dinner that I'm so grateful that you put it
Speaker 3: into words and you documented that better than even my
Speaker 3: memory allowed. So I'm grateful that I had you as
Speaker 3: my like documentarian. So thank you for that and for
Speaker 3: kind of restating it so beautifully.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it was. It was special. He was you know, look,
Speaker 5: I mean it's uh, it's you don't think of losing
Speaker 5: someone like this like this so fast, and but we've
Speaker 5: we've bummed everybody.
Speaker 1: Hut. Yeah, well you know what I mean. I actually
Speaker 1: I think it's beautiful. We'll be back with more of
Speaker 1: John Stamos and my date for this podcast, Kelly Rizzo,
Speaker 1: right after this. If you want to get smarter every
Speaker 1: morning with a breakdown of the news and fascinating takes
Speaker 1: on health and wellness and pop culture, sign up for
Speaker 1: our daily newsletter, wake Up Call by going to Katiecuric
Speaker 1: dot com. We're back with John Stamos, Kelly Rizzo and Wah,
Speaker 1: there is a lot more to you, John Stamos than
Speaker 1: Bob Saggatt. And the book is is really while Bob
Speaker 1: plays an important role in is the through line. As
Speaker 1: you said, it's really a love letter also to your family,
Speaker 1: to growing up.
Speaker 4: So I wanted to ask you about that.
Speaker 1: I mean, you grew up in Orange County in an
Speaker 1: extremely close knit family with your parents and your two sisters,
Speaker 1: one older, one younger.
Speaker 5: Could fast. You're so great. I haven't seen you do
Speaker 5: this in a long time, you know, because you know
Speaker 5: on the morning, it's just hearing your voice, like you
Speaker 5: were saying Kenly, like she's so iconic, she's so You're
Speaker 5: so e and smart, but you're also cute and you
Speaker 5: have this this likability about you and this smile and
Speaker 5: just to be because I don't think we've done many
Speaker 5: interviews together to be interviewed by you like this. Sorry
Speaker 5: to interrupt you, but I just don't know.
Speaker 3: Please don't how lucky am I to so on going
Speaker 3: next to her. I'm just so I feel okay, and.
Speaker 5: You look great. You don't age either, thank you, I
Speaker 5: say either, because I'm talking to myself.
Speaker 1: You look damn good. Can I just say, John Stamos,
Speaker 1: you look damn good. It looks like Can I just say,
Speaker 1: look at that head of hair? What is that?
Speaker 5: I have this very large poster, big like I asked
Speaker 5: my sister to get a little thing for the book,
Speaker 5: and it's it's like the whole wall.
Speaker 2: I think it's fitting.
Speaker 4: I think it's appropriate to you anyway.
Speaker 5: Sorry interruption, getting back to my question.
Speaker 1: Thank you for those nice things that you just said,
Speaker 1: But I want you to just describe your childhood. You know,
Speaker 1: it's so fun to hear how people grew up and
Speaker 1: how their childhoods made them the people they became. I'm
Speaker 1: fascinated by that. More conversations are going on about, you know,
Speaker 1: how you're raised and trauma and all that stuff, and
Speaker 1: it sounds like you had a pretty lovely childhood. Your
Speaker 1: dad owned a restaurant called the Yellow Basket, and you
Speaker 1: worked there as a teen, and you worshiped your dad.
Speaker 4: Is that correct?
Speaker 5: Yes? Yeah? Yeah, he was my hero. Was he was
Speaker 5: you know, he was larger than life. And I think
Speaker 5: when some kids they reached the age where they go, eh,
Speaker 5: he's just a human. My dad was always a superhero
Speaker 5: to me. He was till the day he died. He
Speaker 5: was the coolest mother player. I mean he you know,
Speaker 5: I got One of the perks of doing what we
Speaker 5: do is we get to, you know, do great things
Speaker 5: to meet people. And my dad loves Sinatra, and so
Speaker 5: I got to take him to a Sinatra carus. I
Speaker 5: didn't know Rickles at the time, but he was opening
Speaker 5: up and that was frank and this is how cool
Speaker 5: my dad was. So we got a chance to go back,
Speaker 5: can meet him. It took. It was hard to do,
Speaker 5: and they said, mister Sinatia wants to see you. You'll know,
Speaker 5: smoke signal brow and somebody a little Tonio came during anymosion.
Speaker 5: I missed that Sinatras will see it. We go back
Speaker 5: and we're taking pictures and everything, and it was time
Speaker 5: to take everybody to take a pictures. And I was like,
Speaker 5: come on, Dale's got fair, here's snatchal you love me?
Speaker 5: He said, no, I'm good, I'm good and just sat
Speaker 5: back and just he liked he It was enough for
Speaker 5: him to see his son with Sinatra. And my mom
Speaker 5: on the other hand, you know, Jillie Rizzo nearly you know,
Speaker 5: killed her. She jumped on him and she was trying
Speaker 5: to kiss him. But my dad was so fucking cool man.
Speaker 5: He just stayed back and was like, no, that's okay.
Speaker 5: He was a great man and I got so much
Speaker 5: from him. But one of the things that I highlight
Speaker 5: in the book was that the way he treated people.
Speaker 5: He he treated his bus boy the same way he
Speaker 5: would treat his best customer. And I think and I
Speaker 5: worked on Sundays, and I got I got General Hospital
Speaker 5: during that time, and and and I remember getting when
Speaker 5: I got the role. I was in the casting office
Speaker 5: and I called, I got a call, and I called
Speaker 5: home phone answers and you could get and everybody was
Speaker 5: around the phone and said I got bad news. I
Speaker 5: got it, and they were screaming, and in the back
Speaker 5: you can hear min. I go make sure you don't
Speaker 5: work on Sundays. I need you on Sundays. And sure enough,
Speaker 5: I auditioned, I got it the two days later. I
Speaker 5: shot it the day after that, and it aired two
Speaker 5: weeks later, and it was thirty five million people a day,
Speaker 5: you know, seeing the show Downer Hospital. And I was
Speaker 5: I would still have to go to work on Sunday
Speaker 5: to be my Dad's Sunday guy, you know, and people
Speaker 5: finally start, people started coming in and recognizing me. I
Speaker 5: said that I'm famous. Can I quit? But I think
Speaker 5: it took. And he came out and saw me on
Speaker 5: the set one day and he saw the way that
Speaker 5: I handled people like he does, I think, and then
Speaker 5: he said, all right, enough of the restaurant. This is
Speaker 5: a real thing for you.
Speaker 3: Go.
Speaker 5: I love your son, be the best you can be.
Speaker 3: And go.
Speaker 4: And he wasn't that old when he passed away.
Speaker 5: Well yeah, he was sixty five. It was terrible, but
Speaker 5: and he wasn't. He was emotional enough, you know how
Speaker 5: you know, strong Greek dad, he was you know, my
Speaker 5: mom would say I love you every other word, and
Speaker 5: he said, damn at Latti say it.
Speaker 3: Though.
Speaker 5: He came to Yugoslavia when I was doing a movie
Speaker 5: in the nineties or and he came home and he
Speaker 5: wrote this beautiful letter and faxed it to me and
Speaker 5: I read it then whatever. So when he when he
Speaker 5: had a stroke in the airport in Las Vegas, it
Speaker 5: was in a stroke, it was it. He was, what's
Speaker 5: up to think? Getting choked up here?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 5: He was a colma for six months and he was
Speaker 5: at our house and I knew he was going to
Speaker 5: die any day, and I was looking around in his
Speaker 5: closet and his drawers for something I could keep it.
Speaker 5: He was a super humble guy, drove the same car forever.
Speaker 5: I found a crappy old watch that didn't work. But
Speaker 5: I moved his shirt or something and I saw I
Speaker 5: love you Dad. I was like, oh, my heart stopped,
Speaker 5: like what is this? And it was the original letter
Speaker 5: that he had faxed me in Yugoslabya and I have
Speaker 5: it up there. And the way he laid it out was,
Speaker 5: you know, A, you know, being on the set, the
Speaker 5: way you handle people really maybe proud and B my
Speaker 5: chest is sixty inches, you know, wow because of you
Speaker 5: and C. He says, A man doesn't have many great moments,
Speaker 5: but you have given me many.
Speaker 4: I love your dad, And now you have that framed
Speaker 4: in your office at home.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, I write a lot of notes to my kid.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you know, but now now I'm
Speaker 1: feeling like I should have written. My mom used to
Speaker 1: write put little notes in my lunch bag and say
Speaker 1: things like don't get stuck in your peanut butter sandwich,
Speaker 1: but or when she put a banana that's no banana lady,
Speaker 1: that's my nose, Jimmy to Ranny, but not that. I mean,
Speaker 1: those I think were the only two notes she wrote me.
Speaker 1: But it is a very sweet thing, and.
Speaker 3: I mean, I love how I mean. Obviously, I've heard
Speaker 3: wonderful stories about your mom, but the way she's depicted
Speaker 3: in your book, of course is I mean, she's an angel,
Speaker 3: she's a saint. And I love that these notes that
Speaker 3: she's written you, that you actually have in the book,
Speaker 3: they're like these little guide posts and signposts throughout each chapter.
Speaker 2: So how did you come up with that idea?
Speaker 5: Well, I was looking for a hook, I guess, to
Speaker 5: this book, like you know. And I remember telling the
Speaker 5: agents like I don't like like that book, like the
Speaker 5: art of not giving a fuck, like I need something
Speaker 5: like that, you know. And if you would have told
Speaker 5: me thing. A friend of mine said, hey, why don't
Speaker 5: you call it if you would have told me, because
Speaker 5: I've said that forever. He a friend of my Neel
Speaker 5: was over and Mike Love was calling me, and I
Speaker 5: didn't answer it, and I said, Toff, you would have
Speaker 5: told me. When I was a kid. My first show
Speaker 5: I ever concerted, I went to it was The Beat sports,
Speaker 5: and I wouldn't answer the Vollain Mike love call. So
Speaker 5: it was so that I started that. And then the notes.
Speaker 5: I knew I had them, and I knew my sisters
Speaker 5: had some, so I gathered all those together, sort of
Speaker 5: laid them out. I was like, oh, this is kind
Speaker 5: of going along with my you know, the first chapter.
Speaker 5: You know, when I was getting ready to get in
Speaker 5: my car and go see Bob at the palm and
Speaker 5: you know, and I never made it. I looked out
Speaker 5: the wall, all those frame walls, and I have one
Speaker 5: of her notes frame and said, don't give the devil
Speaker 5: a ride, He'll end up doing the driving. And I go, wow, wow, Okay,
Speaker 5: so that goes there.
Speaker 1: So she just did it all the time. Or when
Speaker 1: would she give you these notes? Would she put them
Speaker 1: on your pillow? How did it work?
Speaker 5: Sometimes they'd be on the pillow. Towards the end when
Speaker 5: my dad died and I always got divorced, and you know,
Speaker 5: we were both in a rough place and we needed
Speaker 5: each other. It was close to being, you know, too much,
Speaker 5: but it was it was definitely a needy relationship. I
Speaker 5: would go there and she called her house the Castle
Speaker 5: of comfort, and so there'd be not saying welcome to
Speaker 5: the Castle of comfort. But a lot of them, you know,
Speaker 5: I found in like birthday cards. It's like some of
Speaker 5: the stuff she said in these birthday cards were like wow,
Speaker 5: you know, like thank God gave you to man dad
Speaker 5: and me and your dad and my life, you know.
Speaker 5: And I found one too. I don't know if it's
Speaker 5: in I think so. Yeah. It was like I was
Speaker 5: the only person that shared a heartbeat with her, Like
Speaker 5: where does she get that from? But that's I never
Speaker 5: thought about that. But yeah, that's true.
Speaker 2: That's beautiful.
Speaker 4: It is.
Speaker 5: I write sometimes. Caitlin and I both wrote Billy a
Speaker 5: letter when he was born, and we put it in
Speaker 5: the safe. But what I do is I set up
Speaker 5: an email account for him, so I'll email him once
Speaker 5: a week, once a month or whatever. And it's easier
Speaker 5: just to kind of talk into the phone and email.
Speaker 5: And then someday, I guess I'll write him out. But
Speaker 5: he's probably got already a couple hundred, you know, letters
Speaker 5: from me waiting for him.
Speaker 4: That's so cool.
Speaker 1: You know, I had wanted to do that, you know,
Speaker 1: the best laid plans of mice and men. I had
Speaker 1: wanted to write my daughter's a letter every year to say,
Speaker 1: this is what happened this year. You know, this is
Speaker 1: what you did. These were some of the moments we had.
Speaker 1: And John, do you think I did it?
Speaker 4: Of course not.
Speaker 2: How great idea.
Speaker 1: They're thirty two and twenty eight now, so I would
Speaker 1: like to write them one letter just you know, my book.
Speaker 1: But my book was kind of my letter to my girls,
Speaker 1: you know, and they I kind of put it all
Speaker 1: out and my life lessons are And that's actually one
Speaker 1: of the reasons I wanted to write my book. I
Speaker 1: wanted to record something not necessarily for strangers, but for
Speaker 1: my daughters, you know, that would memorialize my life. And
Speaker 1: I think this is this is something great for your son.
Speaker 5: You know, yeah, I think so. You know, he's a
Speaker 5: little shit today. He slept with us. He slept with
Speaker 5: me and Kit was on for a couple of nights,
Speaker 5: so crawl into bed with me and it was yesterday
Speaker 5: and wake up in his like, you know, his little
Speaker 5: face is right up my nose right now, And uh
Speaker 5: is it?
Speaker 3: Dad?
Speaker 5: Yeah, you smell like the bathroom at my school. Well,
Speaker 5: thank you, son, Billy, thank you, Billy. Well, he's so
Speaker 5: funny and he and his humor is a lot closer
Speaker 5: to Bob's than mine. And that's you know, sometimes I
Speaker 5: really get bummed out when I that Bob doesn't get
Speaker 5: because he just he said, Dad, when if you have
Speaker 5: to pee and you hold it longer, the pea nest
Speaker 5: goes away or something like that. That's something Michael Bob
Speaker 5: would have talked about.
Speaker 3: That is very close to a Bob joke that we
Speaker 3: know about.
Speaker 5: I walked by and uh not a couple of months,
Speaker 5: a couple of weeks after Bob passed away in and
Speaker 5: he was the nanny was showing him Full House. And
Speaker 5: most time he watches it just to get enough Ammo
Speaker 5: to make fun of, you know, to goof on me,
Speaker 5: and they'll start like, Billy, go clean up your toys.
Speaker 5: You got it. But this particular show, he's five and
Speaker 5: a half and it was The Beach Boys, and he
Speaker 5: it was this this scene where where Danny was telling
Speaker 5: Uncle Jesse he wishes that his life rock and roll
Speaker 5: are cool, and Jesse was saying, I wish I had
Speaker 5: your life of family and stuff, and in truth, it
Speaker 5: was it was the real us. It wasn't the characters.
Speaker 5: And I just lost it and I was kind of
Speaker 5: he could see me out at a side of perpet
Speaker 5: and and you know, in a moment of coolness that
Speaker 5: that I haven't maybe haven't seen since he let me
Speaker 5: have that moment, and I was, you know, I was
Speaker 5: just choked up, and he looked at me and I
Speaker 5: just kind of walked away. But so sometimes he can
Speaker 5: be cool. He's the light of mine.
Speaker 1: He's so cute. He's so cute. He's like a little
Speaker 1: mini John is a handsome kid. I stalk you guys
Speaker 1: on Instagram.
Speaker 5: So weird. I try to teach him because now it's
Speaker 5: like he's a lot of people know you're cute. You're trying,
Speaker 5: and I said, no, you're not. You know, I gotta
Speaker 5: figure out how.
Speaker 1: You don't want to get to well. Also, you have
Speaker 1: to praise different things. You have to praise his grit,
Speaker 1: the fact that she doesn't give up, that he tried
Speaker 1: to think, the fact that he's kind to other people. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's so important because especially for girls, like I used
Speaker 1: to say, if somebody said to my girls, so you're pretty,
Speaker 1: and I'd say, but they're very smart. Actually they're they're
Speaker 1: smarter than they are.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I tell him now, just this morning. I said, people,
Speaker 5: you want people to like you because you're smart, and
Speaker 5: you're kind and you're compassionate, which he is. Yeah, that's
Speaker 5: what you know. But he's a little and I wasn't
Speaker 5: like this as a kid. I guess Caitlyn was a
Speaker 5: flirt of her. He he's got girls. Remember Kelly at
Speaker 5: my birthday party a couple of weeks ago, Gabella still
Speaker 5: Isabella and too much. We were in Disney in Paris,
Speaker 5: and I swear this so he It was two days
Speaker 5: and the first day we had a guide, older French woman,
Speaker 5: very nice but maybe in her fifties or sixties, and believes.
Speaker 5: The next day, this beautiful third thirty year old French
Speaker 5: shows up. It was a bit and billy like boom
Speaker 5: and here's his move, which I can't use because I'm married.
Speaker 5: But he's like, uh so, what's my favorite color?
Speaker 3: Still? So?
Speaker 5: What kind of uh? What's my favorite animal? Huh? Like
Speaker 5: he's quizzing them on his stuff. So and then I
Speaker 5: kind of overhear him talking about his girlfriend, Bella. He's
Speaker 5: gotta go my girlfriend Bella and she lives in the neighborhood.
Speaker 5: It's really nice and spiring. Mamma then the lady goes,
Speaker 5: excuse me, I have to go the Beth of them
Speaker 5: super walks me it's soon, swear to God. As soon
Speaker 5: as she's out of earshot, he goes to me, goes,
Speaker 5: why did I tell her I had a girlfriend?
Speaker 4: Wow, he's already a player.
Speaker 2: That is.
Speaker 5: I don't like it. I don't like it.
Speaker 3: Wait, So, speaking of Disney, so obviously I know you
Speaker 3: as the biggest Disney freak of anyone I've ever met
Speaker 3: in my life. Like, I didn't know like Disney File
Speaker 3: was a thing until I met you. But in your
Speaker 3: book you talk about like the origins of it, which
Speaker 3: was so interesting to me because I never really knew
Speaker 3: where it came from.
Speaker 5: Growing up next to Disney. Yeah. Well, I mean you're
Speaker 5: talking child and my childhood was it was. It couldn't
Speaker 5: have gone better. And I think a lot of people
Speaker 5: kids would go to the Disney to escape whatever they
Speaker 5: were dealing with at home, and I it was the
Speaker 5: opposite For me. I just loved it. But it was
Speaker 5: also when once you walked through those gates, the artistry,
Speaker 5: and you know the way that that these brilliant imagineers
Speaker 5: want you to feel. Age Lambs, I really got attracted
Speaker 5: to that, and it was a place that's sort of
Speaker 5: where I reached puberty. There was a place to you know,
Speaker 5: trying to pick up, try to pick up girls. I
Speaker 5: never really quite got it.
Speaker 4: It was kind of your like your mall growing up maybe.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, right right, yes, and so yeah, I'd be
Speaker 5: standing in line there with my dad's members only jacket
Speaker 5: and zits and hair and feather members.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, that brings back memories my dad.
Speaker 5: Still, the chicks didn't like that. I realized that. But Kelly,
Speaker 5: we all went. We had a great Remember, we all
Speaker 5: with Dave and his wife Melissa, and we all wore Onesies. Remember.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Bob was not happy because it didn't quite fit.
Speaker 5: It was didn't like he couldn't quite sip it.
Speaker 2: And he was very unhappy that we forced him to
Speaker 2: wear the ones.
Speaker 1: But you proposed to your wife at Disney World or Land.
Speaker 1: I guess disney Land out here, Disney World in Orlando.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, like I had a choice. I was done
Speaker 5: with Disney until I met her, and then she's fucking
Speaker 5: back in again.
Speaker 1: One of the things you write about John is that
Speaker 1: you wanted to be famous from the beginning. I mean,
Speaker 1: why What did you see that sparked that in you
Speaker 1: that said I want to be a household name or
Speaker 1: I want it, I want people to know me.
Speaker 5: Yeah. I do say that a lot, and it is true.
Speaker 5: But in closer look that it was really about being
Speaker 5: liked because I, you know, I was before the bullying
Speaker 5: was even a term. Some jack asked gave me a
Speaker 5: black eye because his girlfriend wanted to go out with me,
Speaker 5: and you know that was so humiliating, and I wasn't
Speaker 5: you know, I was a dorky kid. I like puppets
Speaker 5: and magic and nothing cool about any of it. And girls.
Speaker 5: I put a picture in the book of me with
Speaker 5: a puppet trying to impress some girls. She's like, oh,
Speaker 5: then you know the next picture you see me on
Speaker 5: drums like I gotta. But so I think it was
Speaker 5: more of just wanting to be liked. But I did
Speaker 5: you know, being famous was something that I wanted first,
Speaker 5: and then then I learned acting. Acting Okay, I don't
Speaker 5: learn that, but it was yeah, you know, it was
Speaker 5: you know, maybe did you find this writing your book
Speaker 5: that I really discovered my story as I was writing it,
Speaker 5: Like again, like I didn't think it's your life, so
Speaker 5: you go, ah, it's okay, it's not do that. I
Speaker 5: play with it. But as you when you write it
Speaker 5: all down, there's a lot.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 5: And I was always sort of trying to find the
Speaker 5: relatable you know places, and certainly being a dorky kid
Speaker 5: and being bullied, you know, was one. And being cheated on.
Speaker 5: You know, I think you know, people probably think, oh,
Speaker 5: he's never gonna get cheated on looking at him, and
Speaker 5: you know, my wife cheated on me because I have
Speaker 5: no money. I'm not good like no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 5: it's people are assholes. That's why he got cheated or not.
Speaker 5: But so I was trying to find as many relatable
Speaker 5: moments throughout the book, and they kind of came. But
Speaker 5: what I was going to ask you was, did you
Speaker 5: find like as I was discovering my story, I realized
Speaker 5: so many things that happened back then that I get now.
Speaker 5: It was in the middle of a lot of cultural
Speaker 5: being on General Hospital, and the storylines between the black
Speaker 5: actors and the white actors was so different, and they
Speaker 5: had to get their hair done in another place and
Speaker 5: look back, I said, wait a minute, that's segregation, you know. Now,
Speaker 5: you know, we're dealing with homophobia in the theater, inequality
Speaker 5: in the workplace for women, my dad. It was so
Speaker 5: great to write about my dad. He never held my
Speaker 5: mom wanted to be a housewife and she was great,
Speaker 5: and my dad never held that over. He never said,
Speaker 5: I'm not going to make the money you don't. In fact,
Speaker 5: he thought her and praised her for her job was
Speaker 5: harder and more important, and it was. Those are the
Speaker 5: examples that I had. But looking back at all those
Speaker 5: you know, those kind of tent poles moments of my life,
Speaker 5: was interesting.
Speaker 1: It is interesting. I think also if you look back,
Speaker 1: how much things have changed. You know, I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: older than you are, John, I think by six years,
Speaker 1: but you're, well, how are you? I'm sixty six, Yeah,
Speaker 1: so kind of the same generation. And you know, you
Speaker 1: think about like when we were little, nobody was out
Speaker 1: if they were gay. I mean, it was a very
Speaker 1: closeted world. So much homophobia you think about, you know,
Speaker 1: there was if there wasn't segregation, obviously there was de
Speaker 1: facto segregation with a black part of town where I
Speaker 1: grew up. And women obviously the role of women and
Speaker 1: the aspirations you could have as a young woman. My
Speaker 1: mom was a housewife as well, and my dad never
Speaker 1: you know, lauded that over her. But she just didn't
Speaker 1: have that many choices, you know. There weren't that many
Speaker 1: opportunities for my mom to have a life outside the
Speaker 1: home in a very tangible way. So sometimes when I
Speaker 1: was writing my book, I would be like, Wow, we
Speaker 1: have really evolved as a culture. Obviously, we have a
Speaker 1: long way to go. It's not like we've eradicated sexism
Speaker 1: or racism or all the isms that haunt us as
Speaker 1: a society. But the progress that has been made, it
Speaker 1: is the changes in attitudes. It's pretty something, you know,
Speaker 1: it's something to behold.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and I think, you know, yeah exactly. And I
Speaker 5: think about a lot about, you know, some of the
Speaker 5: sexual endeavors that I went through in my life that
Speaker 5: you know, you think of them as. Back then, it
Speaker 5: was like, oh, every school boys dream, you know. I
Speaker 5: walked into my dressing with a naked girl in the closet,
Speaker 5: and and and this penthouse pet came in and had
Speaker 5: sex with me, and and I, you know, I'm happy
Speaker 5: to say that they were not what I thought it
Speaker 5: was going to be. I didn't feel good after. I
Speaker 5: didn't like it. I wanted to love, I want to
Speaker 5: like my family. But yeah, so I found those things.
Speaker 5: We certainly, this me Too movement has been so incredible
Speaker 5: because it's just it really, women have really done a
Speaker 5: brilliant job at making us men, you know, straighten up
Speaker 5: and look at you know, look at the way that
Speaker 5: they've been treated over the years. Uh So, a lot
Speaker 5: of that, But then you look at so then we
Speaker 5: you know, with racism and some of this stuff like
Speaker 5: have we not got past this yet? Come on, there
Speaker 5: was so much of it, I guess stamp down without Okay,
Speaker 5: we're moving forward, and now it's bubbling up again.
Speaker 1: But I think we're having the kind of conversations about it, John,
Speaker 1: that we never did when we were younger. I think
Speaker 1: it was just sort of part of our lives. And
Speaker 1: I remember when I did my my daytime talk show,
Speaker 1: which I renamed My Stupid daytime talk Show, even though
Speaker 1: there were some good episodes, but I remember thinking, well,
Speaker 1: it wasn't It's just I that's a longer story, read
Speaker 1: my book. But it's just that I never got to
Speaker 1: the kind of things that I really wanted to explore.
Speaker 1: Was not necessarily perfect for what a daytime audience.
Speaker 5: Was looking for nowadays, you would do, you would say,
Speaker 5: fuck you, this is the way I want to do
Speaker 5: my show, and here's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: Well I did, and it was canceled. But anyway, well, okay,
Speaker 1: good though, Yeah, yeah I did, and but but I
Speaker 1: remember wanting to do a story of an episode or
Speaker 1: a show on Race and I remember, like nobody, we
Speaker 1: couldn't figure out how to address it or how to
Speaker 1: attack it because it just wasn't part of the national
Speaker 1: conversation back then. So in a way, we've had so
Speaker 1: many growing pains talking about systemic racism and even sexism,
Speaker 1: but at least they're being talked about, if not solved, right, yeah.
Speaker 5: Then there's some culpability. There's some people that are having
Speaker 5: to you know, it's interesting they didn't. The publisher kept saying,
Speaker 5: where's Laurie want to talk about the you know, the
Speaker 5: college gatter you got to write about there. I said, no,
Speaker 5: I don't, And I talked to Laurie about it. She says, yeah,
Speaker 5: go ahead, We'll trying to say anything you want. You
Speaker 5: can defend me. I said, Asheria, and I sort of
Speaker 5: wrote it out. I said, no, this is not I
Speaker 5: didn't like it. And then so it was nothing there.
Speaker 5: And then I said, it does feel like there's something missing,
Speaker 5: and I went back and I just wrote about from
Speaker 5: my point of view, the way she went through it.
Speaker 5: Everybody makes mistakes big and small, and by the way,
Speaker 5: like the last person you think on full that would
Speaker 5: go to jail first be me, probably Jodie or both
Speaker 5: of us together. But the way she you know, it
Speaker 5: was a study and resilience and the way she got
Speaker 5: up every day and you know, took care of a
Speaker 5: family and took care of a marriage. I mean I
Speaker 5: would have crumbled way for she did. So that was
Speaker 5: interesting to be able to just write about her and
Speaker 5: have that conversation, not picking sides.
Speaker 2: She is so strong.
Speaker 3: Just her attitude and outlook on everything, you know, for
Speaker 3: what she went through to just have such a positive
Speaker 3: just a smile on her face and a positive outlook.
Speaker 2: On things, it's really remarkable.
Speaker 1: That must have been mortifying and horrifying for her to
Speaker 1: go through. And people, I mean, I'm not saying what
Speaker 1: she did was right, but people are so cruel and
Speaker 1: so righteous and judgmental.
Speaker 4: That must have been really hard.
Speaker 5: The mud that was slung at her kids daily too,
Speaker 5: you know, in her family. But she you know, yeah,
Speaker 5: I mean it was the way that she handled it,
Speaker 5: and she she was accountable. She did everything she was
Speaker 5: supposed to do. Go to jail, do this, you know,
Speaker 5: and and and a lot of people don't know that
Speaker 5: during that time she was going and helping kids in
Speaker 5: schools and you know, under privileged kids and bringing food
Speaker 5: to anyway, she's a saint, and she you know, she
Speaker 5: made a big mistake and typical Lori fashion, weish she
Speaker 5: got out of jealous. How was it, she goes, Oh,
Speaker 5: it wasn't bad. I met some I met a couple
Speaker 5: of really nice ladies. We're in our book club now,
Speaker 5: and it was like, okay.
Speaker 2: She said.
Speaker 3: She took the time to get to know everyone there
Speaker 3: and learn their stories, and they all had a lot
Speaker 3: of difficult stories, and she really wanted to understand, like
Speaker 3: what brings people to that place.
Speaker 4: You know, she's never.
Speaker 1: Really done an interview, has she No, No, you should
Speaker 1: get her only about it anyway, John, I wanted to
Speaker 1: ask you just a few more things about the book.
Speaker 1: And one is your obsession or lifelong love, I should say,
Speaker 1: of music. And you included a niche quote in your
Speaker 1: yearbook without music life would be in the steak.
Speaker 5: Yeah, my dad thought it was so stupid. He goes,
Speaker 5: that's the dumbest thing I ever heard, really, Dad, Well,
Speaker 5: look who I'm playing with today.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, let's talk about your music and how you
Speaker 1: fell in love with music and the whole process of that.
Speaker 5: I was drumming was my main thing. And by the way,
Speaker 5: if you can see, can you see, Kelly was kind
Speaker 5: enough to give me Bob's guitar. It's the back when
Speaker 5: in the middle, see that. And I don't play it
Speaker 5: because if I picked it up and started playing it
Speaker 5: be like dog licked my balls. Fu fu fuck. But
Speaker 5: you know, so I try not to pick it up,
Speaker 5: but not a digress and I'll go back to you
Speaker 5: need to we need to, Kelly. There's one recording of
Speaker 5: this song before Bob died, and he was working it
Speaker 5: into his act and it's about I just saw it
Speaker 5: the other day. He sings a song about falling in
Speaker 5: love with her dad.
Speaker 3: It's about my dad. It's called I'm Not in Love
Speaker 3: with my Wife's father. Yeah, and it's about my dad
Speaker 3: and it's hilarious. And there's only one because he never
Speaker 3: recorded it and he never it was going to be
Speaker 3: in his new special, and so he didn't want anyone
Speaker 3: else to record it because he didn't want to getting
Speaker 3: out there because it's supposed to be a surprise in
Speaker 3: the special. And so I recorded it at his one
Speaker 3: of his last shows ever in Denver, and I have
Speaker 3: a video of it, and at some point I need
Speaker 3: to release it. And John had, you know, a good
Speaker 3: idea for maybe how we should release that one day.
Speaker 1: But maybe you could do it and raise money for
Speaker 1: Clara Derma or something.
Speaker 5: What was the idea to play it right now?
Speaker 1: On Katie's podcast, No, No, No, I wish I was thinking,
Speaker 1: of course, you know, I like the way you think,
Speaker 1: John Stamos.
Speaker 4: But then I was thinking, no, no, Kelly's way too
Speaker 4: smart for that.
Speaker 5: Well, it's got to be debuted somewhere.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 3: Well, No, she had a good idea. It could be
Speaker 3: to raise money for the SRF.
Speaker 5: By the way, this is a This is the bracelet
Speaker 5: that we put out to raise money for Bob's charity
Speaker 5: and Kelly's charity, and it's the biggest selling bracelet. It's uh,
Speaker 5: we have a thing called Saint Amos and you can
Speaker 5: buy a bracelet this this is one's for Bob.
Speaker 2: I know, I love that you guys did that.
Speaker 4: And wait, what does it go for? Is that first
Speaker 4: claraderma something else?
Speaker 3: Yeah, well it's their charity like in conjunction with the SRF,
Speaker 3: which is really really nice.
Speaker 4: And what is your charity?
Speaker 2: John so thoughtful?
Speaker 5: Well, I've devoted over the last thirty thirty five years
Speaker 5: to the abused children and you know, to stop that
Speaker 5: which it's you know, there's been on the rise since
Speaker 5: the pandemic and I, you know, I talk a little
Speaker 5: bit about it in the book. You know something that
Speaker 5: happened to me. I felt sort of like a Charlottan
Speaker 5: not talking about you know, I had a instiand with
Speaker 5: a babysitter when I was twelve or so, and it
Speaker 5: was I stopped it away and I I came back
Speaker 5: when I was writing a speech for an event that
Speaker 5: they were giving me an award for the childhood and
Speaker 5: I said, you know what, now is not the time
Speaker 5: I'm going to pack this away. And then when I
Speaker 5: was writing the book, I was just like, yeah, I
Speaker 5: did I work? Did I put everything in here that
Speaker 5: I will? Oh wait a minute, what about that? And
Speaker 5: I talked to my sisters and I talked to Kate
Speaker 5: then and it's very brief, but I but you know,
Speaker 5: it was important to me to talk about it. It's
Speaker 5: a very you know, uncomfortable situation with a babysitter, and
Speaker 5: you know, I think that I think the the rate
Speaker 5: is like seven out of every twenty five girls have
Speaker 5: been you know, sexually abused, and only four something out
Speaker 5: of every twenty five men boys. But that's because boys
Speaker 5: don't talk about it. So I felt it was sort
Speaker 5: of important to tell my my incident there.
Speaker 1: The numbers are really amazing, aren't they When you think
Speaker 1: about it, how prevalent it is, and you know what
Speaker 1: a hidden, dark secret is for so many, so many people,
Speaker 1: and how how much it shapes them going forward with
Speaker 1: their view of themselves and the way they look at
Speaker 1: others and relationships and all that.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's why I thought it was important. And we
Speaker 5: have a one eight hundred number one eight hundred four
Speaker 5: a child and this is one of the reasons why
Speaker 5: I mentioned the book too, so I could talk about
Speaker 5: that because if you you know, if you feel like
Speaker 5: there's abuse going on, you can call. The other thing
Speaker 5: is like we talked to if your parent and you're
Speaker 5: stressed and and you're thinking about getting angry at your kids.
Speaker 5: You can call that number two. So that was important.
Speaker 1: We'll be back with more of John Stamos and Kelly
Speaker 1: Rizzo my Plus one right after this. We're back with
Speaker 1: Kelly Rizzo and John Stamos. Let's go back to music,
Speaker 1: because I feel like you didn't really tell me about that,
Speaker 1: because you write without music, life would be a mistake.
Speaker 1: That's a Nietzche quote. My dad thought it was stupid.
Speaker 1: I don't think he knew how important music was to me.
Speaker 1: Of course, he didn't think it was so stupid. When
Speaker 1: I went on to play drums with the Beach Boys,
Speaker 1: John Fogerty and Bruce Springsteen, BB King, Willie Nilson, Little Richard, America, God,
Speaker 1: remember America. I loved America, Tom Jones and many more
Speaker 1: grades over the years. That's so cool.
Speaker 5: Yeah, vibe. Yeah, I've been blessed to I'm a good
Speaker 5: I'm a decent drummer. I'm not a terrible singer. And
Speaker 5: a melody was always sort of escape. I love hearing it,
Speaker 5: but I can't play, so I played drums. It was
Speaker 5: my identity, you know, even before wanting to be an actor.
Speaker 5: I didn't evenly act in school, and I didn't really
Speaker 5: it wasn't in any of the plays. And I wasn't
Speaker 5: a good singer. But finding something early and I encourage
Speaker 5: any parent to steer the kid towards something that they
Speaker 5: helped find their identity. And that's how I wasn't junior
Speaker 5: high school and high school. I was a music I
Speaker 5: was a drummer. I was in the marching vantag Jutment.
Speaker 5: I just loved it. I just loved it. And the
Speaker 5: first time I heard the Beach Boys song at Disneyland,
Speaker 5: I was across the park at the Matterhorn and I
Speaker 5: heard Sloop John b and it pulled me over like
Speaker 5: a like you know, like a pied piper, you know.
Speaker 5: And I pulled up. I just got to the stage
Speaker 5: and they were singing this a cappella part of Slop
Speaker 5: John Bean. Was like, oh my god, what is it?
Speaker 5: What is that? You know? It was? I call the
Speaker 5: Beachwoys music heart music. You don't have to think about it.
Speaker 5: But and so I just set off and being the
Speaker 5: acting cut sort of took off first. I always wanted
Speaker 5: to play drums on TV. When I was on General Hospital,
Speaker 5: there was a I was asked, can I play drums? Like,
Speaker 5: we're not taking requests, kid, you know, relax. And then
Speaker 5: one day I said to my dad, Dad, this guy
Speaker 5: named Sammy Junior. Something's on the show. What about like
Speaker 5: samm David Junior. M yeah, oh my god, he's a legend.
Speaker 5: And that started my love for the rat pack of
Speaker 5: my dad saying you got to listen to Otra, to
Speaker 5: Dean Martin or Sammy. So I said, what do I
Speaker 5: talk to him about? He said, well, he's a drummer.
Speaker 5: Talked to him about playing drums maybe. So the scene
Speaker 5: was that that Sammy was playing a character and I
Speaker 5: was the host of the talent show at the Waterfront.
Speaker 5: We were raising money for the street kids stuff, and
Speaker 5: I was I was standing next to him. I said,
Speaker 5: mister David, they won't let me play drums on the
Speaker 5: He said right. And I talked him about music and
Speaker 5: I had a real conversation about it, and I do impressions.
Speaker 4: This, yea, yeah, do it. I was like, keep going.
Speaker 5: So so he's so. I talked to him about music
Speaker 5: and he said, okay, ba, how hold on man? And
Speaker 5: he goes over to uh somewhere to talk to the
Speaker 5: producers and he comes back and just do what I say, man,
Speaker 5: I know what, And I remember him being very firm,
Speaker 5: just do what I said in the scene, like okay.
Speaker 5: So I introduced him as the character and he comes
Speaker 5: out and then he goes, uh, Blackie, you playing drums? Right,
Speaker 5: I'm like, and it completely had lived and you can
Speaker 5: it's on YouTube. I'm like, yeah, let's come up here.
Speaker 3: That's the best way to start the show, since I'm
Speaker 3: an opening act.
Speaker 5: It was a little jazz come together, that's it. And
Speaker 5: he plays there was a drum, there was a band
Speaker 5: set of it, and he's playing piano and I'm playing
Speaker 5: drums and you want two three four, And you could
Speaker 5: see this stage like passing on to the young man
Speaker 5: like you you got you one of us. You're a musician,
Speaker 5: you get it. And it was the most beautiful and
Speaker 5: we just kept playing. They didn't stop us, they didn't
Speaker 5: dare stop us. And I heard later that everybody in
Speaker 5: New York and LA and they were all everyone was
Speaker 5: walking towards the monitors like, you know, like, oh my god,
Speaker 5: what having And he and it ended and he gave
Speaker 5: me his big hug, and it was just, you know,
Speaker 5: it was I've been playing music on the TV ever since.
Speaker 5: Thanks to him.
Speaker 4: What a great story, What a great story.
Speaker 1: And now you and Mike Love and the Beach Boys
Speaker 1: are like BFFs, right, the Beach Boys.
Speaker 5: I was obsessed with the Beach Boys as a kid.
Speaker 5: I was obsessed with them and I it was the
Speaker 5: first concert I ever went to at the Universal level theater,
Speaker 5: you know, before I had the roof on it. And
Speaker 5: I just never imagined that one day I'd be with him.
Speaker 5: One of the first times I played with them was
Speaker 5: in They would do these concerts, you know, at the
Speaker 5: Fourth of July, and they did a few shows, and
Speaker 5: then James Watson they're attracting the wrong people. They're not
Speaker 5: America's band, blah blah, and they banned them and brought.
Speaker 4: Oh they did the Interior Secretary.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's Jacks and and they got Wayne Newton instead,
Speaker 5: and so don you know, and Nancy Reagan's now I'm
Speaker 5: more of a you know, she was more of a
Speaker 5: surfer girl than had dunka Shane Gallant. So they got
Speaker 5: rid of him and then brought the Beach Boys back.
Speaker 5: And that's when I did it with him. In the afternoon.
Speaker 5: It was in Philadelphia for a million people and there
Speaker 5: were bobs from and then DC for seven hundred and
Speaker 5: fifty thousand people. That was one of the first times
Speaker 5: I played with them.
Speaker 1: Wow are you worried about anything in this book? John,
Speaker 1: I mean you talk about your marriage to Rebecca Romaine.
Speaker 1: That was challenging and difficult, and I always thought, Wow,
Speaker 1: two people in the same profession must be a very
Speaker 1: fraught situation, right, And it turned out to be for
Speaker 1: you all.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't know if it was because I mean
Speaker 5: she yeah, I don't know. It was interesting that again,
Speaker 5: that was a discovery that I made, Like the and
Speaker 5: you know what, you're the first person asking me about that.
Speaker 3: This.
Speaker 5: They were saying, well, you have to write about that.
Speaker 5: I said, no, I don't, but I guess I did.
Speaker 5: And what I came to discover, you know, all these
Speaker 5: years I was like, she's a terrible president. She even
Speaker 5: did this, and she did that, blah blah blah. And
Speaker 5: in Rihab when I was doing the twelve step, the
Speaker 5: fourth step is to down all your resentments, and she
Speaker 5: did that. You know, I had a field day with that.
Speaker 5: And that you know, the guy says you're done, and
Speaker 5: I said, no, there me another pen writing all this stuff,
Speaker 5: and he said, no, what part did you play in that?
Speaker 3: Is it?
Speaker 5: What? I don't paid it, even if it was one
Speaker 5: percent of it. And I started writing that down, and
Speaker 5: I realized I had more to do with the demise
Speaker 5: of our marriage than I was willing to admit all
Speaker 5: these years. And at that moment I had just learned
Speaker 5: to forgive and let it go. But so that was
Speaker 5: the only way I really was going to write about that.
Speaker 5: You know, what happened in the book that you know
Speaker 5: that that she was It just didn't work out. No
Speaker 5: good guys, no bagg you. It is just the way
Speaker 5: it is.
Speaker 1: Well, you know, I think writing a book, you have
Speaker 1: to be honest about your flaws, and sometimes that's kind
Speaker 1: of embarrassing, you know, but you you know, you have
Speaker 1: to say where you fell short and what you wish
Speaker 1: you had done differently. I mean, it's a it's a
Speaker 1: very sometimes painful look at your life. Obviously, there are
Speaker 1: a lot of incredibly wonderful things that happened, but you
Speaker 1: have to reassess some of the things that you did
Speaker 1: and own it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, otherwise, what's you know, what's the point. I did
Speaker 5: start out like to write a hero story I did,
Speaker 5: and then I was like no, no, no, no, and
Speaker 5: then it became a human story.
Speaker 3: Well, you said you wanted it to be relatable, and
Speaker 3: that's how you can be relatable is when you're human
Speaker 3: and you're showing you know, as you said, like how
Speaker 3: you fell short, and you know, if you're the hero story,
Speaker 3: it's not going to be as relatable to people.
Speaker 1: Right before we go, Kelly, obviously, I think for you
Speaker 1: from what I understand reading about Bob and reading what
Speaker 1: John wrote about Bob and what he meant to him,
Speaker 1: I mean, that must have been an incredible experience for you,
Speaker 1: both one of of pain but also one of great memories.
Speaker 1: And when you called John after you read the part
Speaker 1: about Bob, what did you say, Yeah, well.
Speaker 3: I wanted John to know in case we didn't have
Speaker 3: as much time to discuss it today, like just to
Speaker 3: hear from me how much it meant to me, not
Speaker 3: only as Bob's wife and as John's friend, but also
Speaker 3: just as somebody in the public who's going to read this,
Speaker 3: how they're going to see Bob and see how he
Speaker 3: was portrayed as a person, as a friend as I mean,
Speaker 3: because you know, you write about even parts of our
Speaker 3: relationship or mine and Bob's, you know, as a husband,
Speaker 3: as a friend, as a brother, which you had said
Speaker 3: that you guys had always both you wanted brothers, and
Speaker 3: so you guys finally did become that to each other
Speaker 3: after you know, wasn't right away.
Speaker 2: Took a few years.
Speaker 3: But I told you yesterday when I called you in
Speaker 3: tears that it just meant so much to me that
Speaker 3: you told his story so beautifully and about just who
Speaker 3: he was and how people reading this are just to
Speaker 3: gets such an incredible picture of who he truly was
Speaker 3: as a person. But also the memory that you have
Speaker 3: of so many of these instances were so detailed, And
Speaker 3: it was also so great to get it from your perspective, because,
Speaker 3: as I said, I had really only heard Bob's perspective,
Speaker 3: and you just did such a beautiful, wonderful tribute to him.
Speaker 3: And he would be so proud. I know his girls
Speaker 3: are going to be so proud. I'm so proud, and
Speaker 3: you should just be so proud.
Speaker 5: Than that means the world to me. I was really
Speaker 5: you know, I didn't know what I didn't know. I
Speaker 5: was really thank you. I appreciate that.
Speaker 1: I mean, I was telling Kelly, I lost a good
Speaker 1: friend recently, and I am going to carry her in
Speaker 1: my heart and try to be more like her moving on.
Speaker 1: And I'm just curious if you if there's anything about
Speaker 1: you that changed after losing Bob.
Speaker 5: Well, yeah, of course. I mean, you know, Kelly can
Speaker 5: attest that his whole thing was he never left anything
Speaker 5: on the table. I always said, I love you, I
Speaker 5: care about you know, and tomorrow is never promised. And
Speaker 5: Bob lived his life that way, right, And he went out.
Speaker 5: I remember talking to him home Jamie the Curtis she
Speaker 5: wrote the thing in the front. I remember telling Jamie
Speaker 5: like he was so alive, and she said, yeah, and
Speaker 5: that wouldn't you rather die alive and vibrant than some
Speaker 5: old you know, comrudging on the couch, you know that
Speaker 5: didn't you know, fulfill the dreams? Kelly can attest he was,
Speaker 5: he had a new thing about him. He felt like
Speaker 5: a teenager again. He was doing new stuff. And he
Speaker 5: played that last night. That last show he played was
Speaker 5: like a two hour show, right. I mean, he just
Speaker 5: and and you know I just wrote about just picturing
Speaker 5: him going, you know, on his way home, he called
Speaker 5: Kelly and said he had a great show, and he
Speaker 5: had a picture and he wanted her to fix it up,
Speaker 5: and she said, you look handsome, but I don't need
Speaker 5: to fix anything there, and he and it was beautiful,
Speaker 5: and he just loved you so much, Kelly, and and
Speaker 5: he I just pictured him going to bed thinking about
Speaker 5: all of us, all the people that he loves, that
Speaker 5: he would see us again, and that the laughter didn't
Speaker 5: have time to die down and he left us. But
Speaker 5: I just, uh, that's the way, That's what I hope
Speaker 5: he felt when he fell asleep and didn't wake up.
Speaker 3: Well, if I could just share one thing, sorry, I
Speaker 3: just I love you John anyway. That really got me.
Speaker 3: That made me like start bawling. This is why I
Speaker 3: called you yesterday because there was one quote from it
Speaker 3: that you know, for people listening to this that it
Speaker 3: was such an incredible, like personal little exchange that just
Speaker 3: shows how well you knew Bob too. And it's just
Speaker 3: kind of explained this like all three of our relationship.
Speaker 3: But you said, I knew from the start that she
Speaker 3: really loved Bob for the way we all did. She'd
Speaker 3: listened to him rattle on about himself for a bit
Speaker 3: longer than I usually would. The first time she said
Speaker 3: to him, this isn't all about you, Bob, I knew
Speaker 3: she was the one.
Speaker 2: He'd pout.
Speaker 3: She'd kiss him, and in a sweet tone, she'd say,
Speaker 3: you know, I love you, honey as we hug in
Speaker 3: the driveway. Tell her you got ripped off. You didn't
Speaker 3: have him long enough. And you know, and I've said
Speaker 3: before that that's one of those things that it's so
Speaker 3: understandable why people think that, because you know, we'd only
Speaker 3: been we'd only had three and a half years of
Speaker 3: being married. But and I'm sure you feel this now too,
Speaker 3: that it's just there's so much of an overwhelming feeling
Speaker 3: of gratitude that we did have him at all, versus
Speaker 3: feeling we didn't have him longer.
Speaker 5: So that's true. We're all better off because of him,
Speaker 5: and you know, we have to really take his thing
Speaker 5: and just live each moment the most we can and
Speaker 5: be loving.
Speaker 1: And as you said, leave nothing unsaid. Maybe that's a
Speaker 1: good lesson from Bob. You know, tell people in your
Speaker 1: life regularly what they mean to you.
Speaker 4: Amen.
Speaker 5: And you both mean so much to me.
Speaker 4: Oh thanks John.
Speaker 1: By the way, when I instagram stalk you, you were beloved.
Speaker 1: I mean everyone loves you, John Stamos.
Speaker 5: What is that supposed to mean?
Speaker 4: You're very popular?
Speaker 1: Like when it was your birthday, all the notes and
Speaker 1: the comments. I was like, good lord, this guy is
Speaker 1: is very well loved. And I meant it as a compliment,
Speaker 1: not as a diss and well, no, I agregiate it.
Speaker 5: But yeah, okay, thank you. I mean, you know, but
Speaker 5: I think that's another reason to write a book. And
Speaker 5: I'm sure you felt this too. It's like, the book
Speaker 5: is not like an Instagram post and a blip here
Speaker 5: and a blip there, and here look what I'm doing here.
Speaker 5: You know, it's a deep, deep die. Right, But thank you, Katie.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna listen to you. I'm gonna start listen to
Speaker 5: your book tonight. Really, Okay, did you enjoy that the audio?
Speaker 5: That was my favorite part was the hardest, But I
Speaker 5: really loved doing the other.
Speaker 1: It was hard, honestly, and it was during the pandemic.
Speaker 1: So this makeshift studio I put together in a bedroom,
Speaker 1: I have like blankets. It was like a fort we
Speaker 1: build as a kid, with pillows and blankets and under
Speaker 1: you know, this huge.
Speaker 4: Mess of stuff.
Speaker 1: Because we didn't have a recording studio to do it
Speaker 1: in and it was exhausting. I have to say it
Speaker 1: was exhausting, but it was worth it because I think
Speaker 1: to have you narrating your own book, telling your own story,
Speaker 1: I can't imagine getting someone else to read your words.
Speaker 4: And by the way, you're a very good writer.
Speaker 5: John, Oh, thank you. Yeah. It was the hardest that
Speaker 5: they said, oh, you can get it done a five
Speaker 5: or six days. I took like thirty two days or something,
Speaker 5: because you would it would just start, first of all,
Speaker 5: your cold reading your life, and that's weird, and you
Speaker 5: could change things that didn't sound right, and it was
Speaker 5: very emotional. I would just go after a couple hours
Speaker 5: and be like, I gotta go too much.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you got to pace yourself.
Speaker 5: I'm glad I did it, and I'm glad to talk
Speaker 5: to you guys today about this.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I'm excited to hear your audio as well.
Speaker 5: Well.
Speaker 1: Thank you for doing this, John Kelly, thank you for
Speaker 1: doing it this, Thank so for coming on in. I
Speaker 1: think Kelly added such an important dimension, and it's really
Speaker 1: nice for me to witness your friendship and how much
Speaker 1: you love each other and mean to each other, and
Speaker 1: the fact that you tell each other that and leave
Speaker 1: nothing unsaid.
Speaker 2: I appreciate you Ken, I love you brother.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. Everyone. If you have a question for me,
Speaker 1: a subject you want us to cover, or you want
Speaker 1: to share your thoughts about how you navigate this crazy
Speaker 1: world reach out. You can leave a short message at
Speaker 1: six oh nine five one two five five five, or
Speaker 1: you can send me a DM on Instagram. I would
Speaker 1: love to hear from you. Next Question is a production
Speaker 1: of iHeartMedia and Katie Kuric Media. The executive producers are Me,
Speaker 1: Katie Kuric, and Courtney Ltz. Our supervising producer is Ryan Martz,
Speaker 1: and our producers are Adriana Fazzio and Meredith Barnes. More
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