1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,679 Speaker 1: Am I the a hole for blocking my best friend 2 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:07,000 Speaker 1: on social media after they disinvited me to their wedding? Ooh? 3 00:00:07,560 --> 00:00:11,400 Speaker 1: I mean that's that kind of hurts drama And this 4 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:13,560 Speaker 1: is dans the question of when is it necessary to 5 00:00:13,640 --> 00:00:16,560 Speaker 1: confront a friend? I think when maybe when they disinvite 6 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:21,520 Speaker 1: their disinvite you ouch. Uh so. Danny Watson, twenty two says, 7 00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:25,040 Speaker 1: I twenty seven female, and my best friend twenty six female, 8 00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:27,720 Speaker 1: have been friends since year eight in school, which is 9 00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:29,800 Speaker 1: over fifteen years of friendship. 10 00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:30,920 Speaker 2: That's a lot. 11 00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:33,880 Speaker 1: We were very close as teenagers. We would spend every 12 00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:37,840 Speaker 1: day hanging out at each other's houses, having sleepovers, et cetera. 13 00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:41,000 Speaker 1: We were pretty much inseparable. In year ten, when I 14 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:43,640 Speaker 1: was fifteen years old, my family and I moved to 15 00:00:43,640 --> 00:00:46,720 Speaker 1: another town about three hours away. However, best friend and 16 00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:49,480 Speaker 1: I remained close and would talk to each other all 17 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:52,440 Speaker 1: the time. We did sometimes meet up and go and 18 00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:55,920 Speaker 1: visit each other over the weekends. In time, we drifted 19 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,440 Speaker 1: a little, but we always kept in contact and stayed 20 00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:01,160 Speaker 1: close even if we didn't talk every day. Best friend 21 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:03,279 Speaker 1: has been with the same guy since I moved. They 22 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:05,920 Speaker 1: went to Spain for the first ever holiday together When 23 00:01:05,959 --> 00:01:09,080 Speaker 1: they arrived home, best friend told me her boyfriend had proposed. 24 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:10,880 Speaker 2: Oh so do. 25 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:14,120 Speaker 1: I was absolutely over the moon for them. She was 26 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:17,120 Speaker 1: so excited and asked me to be her bridesmaid. 27 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:17,880 Speaker 2: Wow. 28 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:20,800 Speaker 1: She explained she was not going to be having a 29 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:22,959 Speaker 1: maid of honor as she couldn't choose between her best 30 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,520 Speaker 1: friend and her sister, so she would have all of 31 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:28,720 Speaker 1: us be her bridesmaids, which I was so ecstatic for. 32 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,520 Speaker 2: I was about to say, like, why why not, mad 33 00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:32,759 Speaker 2: I think you need to choose. 34 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:34,959 Speaker 1: I think you need to choose who your favorite is. 35 00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:37,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, and it's me. 36 00:01:38,319 --> 00:01:42,240 Speaker 1: I'm your bridesmaid now. I explained to best friend that 37 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:44,280 Speaker 1: I would be more than happy to help her with 38 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:47,039 Speaker 1: any planning for the wedding, and she seemed thankful, but 39 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:49,160 Speaker 1: explained that they needed to save some money for a 40 00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:52,400 Speaker 1: couple of years first, which I agreed, and we move 41 00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:55,280 Speaker 1: forward with life. Over the few years after the engagement, 42 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:57,840 Speaker 1: she would regularly check in and ask if I was 43 00:01:57,880 --> 00:02:00,520 Speaker 1: still happy to be her bridesmaid, as they were soon 44 00:02:00,880 --> 00:02:05,400 Speaker 1: going to start planning. Then COVID happened. Ah Yes, which 45 00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:07,080 Speaker 1: put a bit of a halt on the plans due 46 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:08,520 Speaker 1: to the fact that they did not want to do 47 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:11,520 Speaker 1: their wedding during the pandemic, but she carried on planning 48 00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:14,520 Speaker 1: the wedding throughout. Once the pandemic had finally felt like 49 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:16,520 Speaker 1: it was blowing over and things were starting to get 50 00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:19,400 Speaker 1: back to normal, my partner and I started making plans 51 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 1: to move to Canada. We had always wanted to live 52 00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:23,560 Speaker 1: in another country for a couple of years, so we 53 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:25,919 Speaker 1: started to put wheels in motion to make it happen. 54 00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:28,880 Speaker 1: I informed best friend about our plans, and she asked 55 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:30,720 Speaker 1: if we would still be able to attend the wedding, 56 00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:33,000 Speaker 1: as it would be held in May of twenty twenty three. 57 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,440 Speaker 1: We were making plans for the move to take place 58 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:37,839 Speaker 1: in August of twenty twenty three, so we had more 59 00:02:37,919 --> 00:02:41,520 Speaker 1: than enough time to attend. She didn't mention anything about 60 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:44,480 Speaker 1: being her bridesmaid, though, which confused me a little, as 61 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:47,160 Speaker 1: it's something she had always talked about up until this point. 62 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:49,760 Speaker 1: I assured her that we would be more than willing 63 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:52,040 Speaker 1: to make the trip down to my hometown to attend 64 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:55,239 Speaker 1: the wedding. She seemed thankful and happy, and even though 65 00:02:55,280 --> 00:02:57,880 Speaker 1: she had not mentioned that I would be in attendance 66 00:02:57,919 --> 00:03:01,080 Speaker 1: as bridesmaid, I was still excit, sorry to celebrate my 67 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:02,280 Speaker 1: best friend's big day. 68 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 2: Do we do we have an icy you? In the comments? Right? 69 00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:07,440 Speaker 2: I see you do we have an icy you? Do 70 00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:09,600 Speaker 2: we have a conspiracy? Do we one level up? Do 71 00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:12,240 Speaker 2: we have a conspiracy theory? What's happening? 72 00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,400 Speaker 1: I think? I think that, Well, what do you think? Actually? 73 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:21,040 Speaker 2: It could be not Sophia's stalling for time. It could 74 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:27,240 Speaker 2: be that maybe the groom the fiance is like, hey, 75 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:30,080 Speaker 2: I don't really like the friend. Or maybe he's like, 76 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:31,320 Speaker 2: I like your friend. 77 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:33,200 Speaker 1: A lot, I like your friend too much. 78 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:36,600 Speaker 2: She's like, oh, I gotta like freaking put a wall between. 79 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:40,880 Speaker 1: Maybe she's just starting to grow apart from her friend 80 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 1: from this time away and she has me. 81 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 2: Maybe she has some like wackeries. I like, you're moving, 82 00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:48,120 Speaker 2: your move, you're moving. 83 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,480 Speaker 1: I don't accept any Canadians in my wedding. 84 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:52,400 Speaker 2: You're moving, and I don't. I don't like that. 85 00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:53,960 Speaker 1: I don't like it. I'm angry. 86 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,440 Speaker 2: That could be that's possible. Yeah, that sounds pretty plausible. 87 00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: As the months passed and the wedding dates started getting closer, 88 00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:03,280 Speaker 1: I noticed that we still had not received an invite 89 00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:07,320 Speaker 1: to the wedding. Oh invite, I thought, it was just 90 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:10,800 Speaker 1: gonna be like, no, no bridesmaid, That's what I thought. 91 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:15,280 Speaker 1: Oh so we still didn't know any details regarding the 92 00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:18,640 Speaker 1: venue or the after party. Nothing. We were told that 93 00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:20,359 Speaker 1: the wedding would be held on a date near the 94 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:24,600 Speaker 1: end of May. However, one day I opened up Facebook 95 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 1: and I saw lots of photos and many messages of 96 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:33,280 Speaker 1: congratulations for best friend and her new husband. That's so 97 00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:37,280 Speaker 1: messed up, yo, Why so messed up? 98 00:04:37,480 --> 00:04:38,480 Speaker 2: She just had the wedding. 99 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:40,839 Speaker 1: She just had the wedding. Celtic Kit says distance makes 100 00:04:40,839 --> 00:04:42,839 Speaker 1: the friendship weaker, and bride didn't want to say anything. 101 00:04:43,240 --> 00:04:45,920 Speaker 1: I understand that on the level of bridesmaid, like I 102 00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:48,440 Speaker 1: don't want you to be my bridesmid anymore, but one 103 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:52,320 Speaker 1: communicate that. And two, I don't think I would ever 104 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:56,200 Speaker 1: disinvite someone from my wedding if it was just distance 105 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,320 Speaker 1: related stuff. 106 00:04:57,560 --> 00:05:00,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, like not close anymore. 107 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:03,520 Speaker 1: But I already invited you to my wedding. 108 00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:05,680 Speaker 2: Even And and I guess you know, I think she's 109 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:09,960 Speaker 2: within kind of feels a holy even just to remove 110 00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:16,599 Speaker 2: her as the bridesmaid, I think al is yeah, hail, yeah. 111 00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:18,159 Speaker 2: I hate all this. 112 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:20,280 Speaker 1: I hate all of this. This is so messed up. 113 00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:21,279 Speaker 2: This is so messed up. 114 00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:25,400 Speaker 1: It's one thing to take away the bride'smaid title, but 115 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:29,880 Speaker 1: a whole nother thing to completely kick her out of 116 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:32,719 Speaker 1: the wedding altogether correct a moondo, and then have the 117 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:35,360 Speaker 1: wedding and not even like, not even tell her, even 118 00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:38,120 Speaker 1: tell her what what message. 119 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:39,920 Speaker 2: Just Becauseana says like, pick up a phone. 120 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:43,400 Speaker 1: Come on, come on, we got so much technology the 121 00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:47,039 Speaker 1: run these these days. I was confused, as the photos 122 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:50,560 Speaker 1: were clearly of their wedding day and they had friends 123 00:05:50,560 --> 00:05:51,799 Speaker 1: and family and attendance. 124 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:58,080 Speaker 2: Sorry to interrupt, Rebecca perellas bride quike quit friendship. That's hilarious, 125 00:05:58,120 --> 00:06:00,159 Speaker 2: so true. 126 00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,719 Speaker 1: She just didn't tell you. I scrolled through the photos 127 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:04,839 Speaker 1: and noticed that she only had two bridesmaids. One of 128 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:07,240 Speaker 1: them was her husband's sister and the other one was 129 00:06:07,279 --> 00:06:09,960 Speaker 1: her own sister. At first glance, it looked like they 130 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:13,400 Speaker 1: were both just bridesmaids, But as I kept scrolling, I 131 00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:16,599 Speaker 1: noticed that her husband's sister was wearing a sash with 132 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:20,040 Speaker 1: maid of honor written on it. So she's a liar 133 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:24,159 Speaker 1: and a backstubberah, and her sister was wearing a sash 134 00:06:24,240 --> 00:06:27,080 Speaker 1: with bridesmaid written on it. As well as some photos 135 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:30,320 Speaker 1: of some personalized champagne glasses with the same titles written 136 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:33,599 Speaker 1: on them. I was confused, as through all these years 137 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:35,480 Speaker 1: she had asked me if I would be a bridesmaid 138 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:37,480 Speaker 1: for her, and even though I did get the hint 139 00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:40,000 Speaker 1: that that was no longer an offer, I did at 140 00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:42,839 Speaker 1: least expect to be invited to the wedding. She was 141 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:45,800 Speaker 1: still my best friend, and in the time leading up 142 00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:48,760 Speaker 1: to the wedding, she was still messaging me and talking 143 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 1: to me like normal about the wedding and how the 144 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:54,200 Speaker 1: planning was going. That's wild. 145 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 2: I would like to update my conspiracy theory to the 146 00:06:58,880 --> 00:07:03,200 Speaker 2: brother's sister was throwing a crazy hissy fit and she 147 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:05,640 Speaker 2: was like, I need to be the maid of honor, 148 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:10,480 Speaker 2: and like what your friend? Like it should only be family? No, 149 00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:12,760 Speaker 2: But because that, I was like, the wife is Opie? 150 00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:15,080 Speaker 2: Is Opie's friend? Yeah, Obie's best friend. 151 00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:15,680 Speaker 1: Yeah? 152 00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:20,120 Speaker 2: So yeah, had had to be her groom or her 153 00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 2: the groom's sister. Yeah. 154 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:24,240 Speaker 1: I feel like I feel like there's something fishy going 155 00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:27,040 Speaker 1: on here. Leading up to the wedding, I hadn't had 156 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:31,160 Speaker 1: any confirmation from her regarding invite or her confirming if 157 00:07:31,240 --> 00:07:34,120 Speaker 1: I was coming or anything of the sort. Honestly, I 158 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:37,680 Speaker 1: think that if I knew it was coming up and 159 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:39,720 Speaker 1: I hadn't received an invite, but I knew i'd been 160 00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:41,960 Speaker 1: verbally invited, I probably would have reached out. 161 00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:45,160 Speaker 2: But Opie never knew the date right, No, but she 162 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:46,400 Speaker 2: knew the like she. 163 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:49,320 Speaker 1: Knew around when the date was happening. I don't think 164 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:50,960 Speaker 1: it's o Pea's fault at all, but I think if 165 00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:53,080 Speaker 1: it were me, I think if I knew around the 166 00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:55,800 Speaker 1: date that it was happening, and it's, you know, a 167 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:58,920 Speaker 1: couple months ahead or something, I think I would reach 168 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:00,320 Speaker 1: out and be like, hey, I don't know if the 169 00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:02,600 Speaker 1: invitations were sent out, but I haven't received Like I 170 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:05,360 Speaker 1: was wondering what the if I had already been invited verbally? 171 00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:06,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I think that's yeah. 172 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:08,280 Speaker 1: I think I would have reached out. 173 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:09,080 Speaker 2: Good move. 174 00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:13,040 Speaker 1: I was hurt to not have been informed about any 175 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:15,880 Speaker 1: of this. I went on Facebook and I deleted her 176 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:18,960 Speaker 1: and her husband. It didn't take long for her to notice, 177 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:21,360 Speaker 1: I'd say within three to four hours I had a 178 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:25,720 Speaker 1: message from her asking what my problem was and why 179 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,320 Speaker 1: I was so offended about that. I felt the need 180 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,680 Speaker 1: to remove her from Facebook. 181 00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:33,000 Speaker 2: She made a Facebook official I don't f with you anymore. 182 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:34,560 Speaker 2: I don't with you. 183 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:40,480 Speaker 1: That's wild for her friend to respond, why are you upset? 184 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:46,599 Speaker 1: M I wonder why. I wonder why let's get on 185 00:08:46,679 --> 00:08:52,080 Speaker 1: these mysteries. Oh my god, that's annoying. Oh, he says. 186 00:08:52,160 --> 00:08:54,640 Speaker 1: I have yet to respond. It's been a while since 187 00:08:54,640 --> 00:08:56,679 Speaker 1: she messaged me, and to be honest, I don't feel 188 00:08:56,679 --> 00:08:59,240 Speaker 1: like I have the words to explain why I removed her. 189 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,079 Speaker 1: I feel that should be obvious, right, but I can't 190 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:04,640 Speaker 1: help but feel somewhat guilty for throwing away that many 191 00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:07,680 Speaker 1: years of friendship over this. You didn't throw it away, 192 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,880 Speaker 1: she did, and Opie says, so am I the a hole? 193 00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:14,040 Speaker 1: And edit? I was in town when her bachelorette party 194 00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:16,480 Speaker 1: was taking place, which I was not aware of at 195 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,480 Speaker 1: the time. I asked if she wanted to hang out 196 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,679 Speaker 1: on that day and she said she was busy. I 197 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,680 Speaker 1: then saw the photos from the bachelorette later on that 198 00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:25,840 Speaker 1: evening y out. 199 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:30,040 Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, she the friend was the one who 200 00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:32,240 Speaker 2: who did all this stuff. And then it's like when 201 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,920 Speaker 2: someone wrongs you and hurts you to that degree. I 202 00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:38,200 Speaker 2: don't know that you need to explain yourself or being 203 00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:41,560 Speaker 2: the one that is like trying to We had a 204 00:09:41,559 --> 00:09:47,120 Speaker 2: story recently that I thought was really cool where Ope 205 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 2: said to her partner, Hey, if you want to fix this, 206 00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:54,480 Speaker 2: I'm gonna let you. Actually, will you come to my place, 207 00:09:54,600 --> 00:09:57,160 Speaker 2: you tell me what you're gonna do. I'm not gonna 208 00:09:57,280 --> 00:10:01,880 Speaker 2: drag you and carry you on if my responsibility exactly 209 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:03,959 Speaker 2: like Op was the one that was wronged and now 210 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:06,000 Speaker 2: it's being like put on appeel, like, oh, we'll explain 211 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,800 Speaker 2: what's going on, Like what are we doing here? It's like, no, 212 00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:12,000 Speaker 2: it's not I If Op wants to move on from 213 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,920 Speaker 2: the friendship and just move on with her life, that 214 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:16,160 Speaker 2: is well within the right. 215 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:20,080 Speaker 1: No, I think there are certain scenarios where I'm you know, 216 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:24,240 Speaker 1: I would advocate for the person explaining why they were 217 00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:27,320 Speaker 1: hurt and having open lines of communication and everything. But 218 00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:29,640 Speaker 1: in this case, if she doesn't know why you're upset, 219 00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:30,920 Speaker 1: then that's just not your friend. 220 00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:33,880 Speaker 2: Yeah. It's like some some cases we have where it's 221 00:10:34,280 --> 00:10:35,760 Speaker 2: usually we say like, oh, if there's a problem in 222 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:38,280 Speaker 2: the relationship, go to therapy, go to counseling, But sometimes 223 00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:41,200 Speaker 2: it's just like no, no, just just cut it, snip 224 00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 2: that cut it Out update. 225 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:46,600 Speaker 1: I went back and forth about whether or not to 226 00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:49,680 Speaker 1: actually respond to best friend after the responses to this post. 227 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,360 Speaker 1: I had some really lovely comments telling me not to 228 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:54,560 Speaker 1: give it the time of day, but I also had 229 00:10:54,600 --> 00:10:57,240 Speaker 1: some people explaining that I deserve a reason for not 230 00:10:57,240 --> 00:11:01,439 Speaker 1: being invited. Well, I've decided not to respond to her message. 231 00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:03,840 Speaker 1: I feel the best outcome for me is to protect 232 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,960 Speaker 1: my peace and move on to better friendships that bring 233 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:10,520 Speaker 1: value and happiness to my life. I'm thankful for the 234 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:12,760 Speaker 1: years of friendship I did have with her, but I 235 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:15,560 Speaker 1: feel it's definitely time to let it go, and ultimately, 236 00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:18,560 Speaker 1: if the roles were reversed, I would have never treated 237 00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:20,600 Speaker 1: her in this way. I have reminisced on the years 238 00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:22,400 Speaker 1: leading up to all of this and came to a 239 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,199 Speaker 1: conclusion that it was very one sided. For a large 240 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:27,880 Speaker 1: portion of the time we've been friends, I would send 241 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:30,320 Speaker 1: birthday cards or even gifts if I could afford to 242 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:33,240 Speaker 1: do so, for them and their kids, and sometimes it 243 00:11:33,240 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 1: wouldn't even come with a thank you. I never expected 244 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:39,679 Speaker 1: anything in return, of course, but it has solidified the 245 00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:42,319 Speaker 1: fact it was mainly me making the effort with the 246 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:45,880 Speaker 1: friendship toward the end. I'm sorry to disappoint anyone who 247 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:48,559 Speaker 1: was waiting on a more dramatic outcome, but I'm also 248 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,360 Speaker 1: thankful to those of you who took the time to 249 00:11:50,360 --> 00:11:53,840 Speaker 1: give some great advice and comment some really sweet responses. 250 00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:57,280 Speaker 1: Just to clarify a couple of things, No, I never 251 00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:59,960 Speaker 1: did receive an invitation. She didn't ask for an update 252 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:03,319 Speaker 1: need address, nor did she inform me that she'd sent one. 253 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,400 Speaker 1: I was told the wedding would be towards the end 254 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,680 Speaker 1: of May, but when I saw the photos on Facebook, 255 00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 1: it was near the end of April, so the wedding 256 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:13,000 Speaker 1: date had changed without my knowledge. It's possible she was 257 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:16,439 Speaker 1: hurt by my moving countries, but considering I already didn't 258 00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:19,200 Speaker 1: live near her and hadn't done for quite some time, 259 00:12:19,320 --> 00:12:21,080 Speaker 1: I can't see that being the main reason for this. 260 00:12:21,679 --> 00:12:24,680 Speaker 1: No disagreements or incidents between us took place to warrant 261 00:12:24,679 --> 00:12:27,840 Speaker 1: any of this, either, so it really was a complete 262 00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:30,360 Speaker 1: mystery to me. I've had some really nice messages from 263 00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:33,360 Speaker 1: some people on here offering friendships or advice, to which 264 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 1: has been lovely, and I thank you guys for being 265 00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:39,560 Speaker 1: so kind. Ultimately, I decided I'm worth more, and I 266 00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:41,520 Speaker 1: didn't want to carry on a friendship with someone who 267 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 1: could treat me in that manner, Nor do I want 268 00:12:44,280 --> 00:12:46,320 Speaker 1: to drag out any more drama with her when the 269 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:49,920 Speaker 1: friendship has clearly been over for a long time and 270 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:52,160 Speaker 1: that is the end of that story. 271 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 2: Low cloud. Yeah, so class, Yes, why waste my time 272 00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:59,840 Speaker 2: on someone who is not going to invest time and 273 00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:02,880 Speaker 2: love back into me. No, cut it out, that par 274 00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:05,839 Speaker 2: cut it out, get it out of here, out of 275 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:06,480 Speaker 2: my face. 276 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:10,320 Speaker 1: Don't even want to look at it. Gone, gone, be gone. 277 00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:14,239 Speaker 1: I want to be a baby, and my object permanence 278 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,680 Speaker 1: of that friendship is just it doesn't exist. Wow. 279 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:21,800 Speaker 2: That's that's incredible. Yeah, maybe one of your better references. 280 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:22,400 Speaker 1: Thank you. 281 00:13:22,679 --> 00:13:24,880 Speaker 2: Wow. By the way, do you want some worms? 282 00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:25,960 Speaker 1: I want some worms? 283 00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:29,680 Speaker 2: Am I they a hole for telling my husband's girl 284 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:32,280 Speaker 2: best friend she can't host my baby shower? 285 00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:34,480 Speaker 1: Why is she hosting your baby shower? 286 00:13:34,559 --> 00:13:37,120 Speaker 2: I see ic us all over this title, And this 287 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,640 Speaker 2: is the answer the question when is it necessary to 288 00:13:39,679 --> 00:13:43,280 Speaker 2: confront a friend? A question that could be pasted at 289 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,560 Speaker 2: the end of stories that could help our hosts remember 290 00:13:46,679 --> 00:13:48,320 Speaker 2: to ask them at the end. 291 00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:51,040 Speaker 1: I could only do so much. 292 00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:56,240 Speaker 2: Okay, lawes, this guy's from pollution. He says, h twenty 293 00:13:56,280 --> 00:13:59,240 Speaker 2: two female and my husband, twenty three male, got married young. 294 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:02,160 Speaker 2: I was a he was nineteen. Both of us knew 295 00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,560 Speaker 2: we always wanted to get married and start a family young. 296 00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:07,520 Speaker 2: I started college two years ago and he just graduated 297 00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:12,080 Speaker 2: with a Bachelor of Biomedical Science. Pretty good. My husband 298 00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:14,920 Speaker 2: has a girl best friend, a twenty three female who 299 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:21,040 Speaker 2: I'll call Sam, not another Sam, Sam. Sam's just Sam 300 00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:23,360 Speaker 2: and all over the place, Samon, all over the place, 301 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:26,200 Speaker 2: who he met in college. Both of them grew a Baptist, 302 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,240 Speaker 2: and while he's left the church. They had a very 303 00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:31,880 Speaker 2: similar childhood and bonded quite quickly. Despite what you might 304 00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:35,000 Speaker 2: be thinking, her and I get along really well. 305 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:38,240 Speaker 1: Ye right right, I believe it when I see it, 306 00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:41,680 Speaker 1: that's right. I want the proof, the proof. 307 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 2: She and I liked the same music, and we were 308 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:49,880 Speaker 2: both studying in relatively the same fields, so she became 309 00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:51,600 Speaker 2: a friend of mine as well. There were no quotes. 310 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,640 Speaker 2: I just put that on there for sillies. Since I 311 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:57,000 Speaker 2: found out I was pregnant, though, some issues have started 312 00:14:57,120 --> 00:15:00,880 Speaker 2: to arise. You know, we triggered the crazy We announced 313 00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:03,560 Speaker 2: our pregnancy on social media after we told our parents. 314 00:15:03,920 --> 00:15:07,200 Speaker 2: Sam texted my husband a congrats text and then told 315 00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:10,000 Speaker 2: him to pass on her well wishes to me. She's 316 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:13,800 Speaker 2: been texting him non stop with baby advice and what 317 00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:18,280 Speaker 2: she likes to call advice for mama, which includes sometimes 318 00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:22,000 Speaker 2: relatively targeted jabs at what I should eat. 319 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:26,080 Speaker 1: Why is she sending she presumably she does not have 320 00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:29,920 Speaker 1: a baby. Yes, I'm thinking they're around the same age, 321 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:33,040 Speaker 1: if they're going to the classes. Yeah, so I would 322 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:33,880 Speaker 1: be kind of annoyed. 323 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,000 Speaker 2: Maybe she doesn't have a baby. 324 00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:37,840 Speaker 1: Okay, well maybe she does. If she does have a baby, 325 00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:39,880 Speaker 1: it makes more sense. But if she doesn't have a baby, 326 00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:43,760 Speaker 1: and she's just sending kind of unsolicited advice that presumably, 327 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:47,720 Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe she found on like Wikipedia. 328 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:50,840 Speaker 2: What are you doing? Honestly, I kept brushing these texts off, 329 00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:53,240 Speaker 2: but it got to a point where the conversations were 330 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,080 Speaker 2: less about the baby and more about me, which I 331 00:15:56,160 --> 00:16:00,080 Speaker 2: was getting increasingly uncomfortable with because she wasn't texting me, 332 00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:03,760 Speaker 2: she was texting my husband. What Yeah, all the things 333 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,800 Speaker 2: that she's mentioning. He's like, oh, yeah, she should, you know, 334 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,480 Speaker 2: be eating more broccoli, and she should stop eating ice cream. 335 00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:12,560 Speaker 2: It's so bad. She's texting it to the husband only Icky, 336 00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:16,080 Speaker 2: not even a group chat, especially because they're friends. 337 00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:18,200 Speaker 1: Why would you be texting Heller. 338 00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:22,080 Speaker 2: My husband acknowledged this, and he just started to show 339 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:24,400 Speaker 2: them to me and ask what I wanted him to do. 340 00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:27,560 Speaker 2: I told him just to ignore them. When I announced 341 00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:30,240 Speaker 2: I was having a baby shower and sent out the invites, 342 00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:35,640 Speaker 2: I received a text from none other than Sam Sam. Sam, Sam, 343 00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:38,400 Speaker 2: What does she want? She said something along the lines 344 00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:41,680 Speaker 2: of wanting to host my baby shower and set it up. 345 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:45,440 Speaker 2: What I own your baby shower? This belongs to me. 346 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:48,480 Speaker 2: That's I will do this. This is mine. 347 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:50,840 Speaker 1: So strange, so strange. 348 00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:55,360 Speaker 2: When you stopped texting him and sending it to the husband, 349 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:56,240 Speaker 2: these little. 350 00:16:56,120 --> 00:17:00,280 Speaker 3: Jabs yeah, no, no, no, no, no now now. 351 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:02,560 Speaker 2: I told her politely that my mom was planning on 352 00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:04,679 Speaker 2: hosting it with the help of my sister and that 353 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:06,960 Speaker 2: it was a special moment for them and I wouldn't 354 00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:10,680 Speaker 2: want to take that away. Well, say ignored that message, 355 00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:13,560 Speaker 2: because the next day she came over and insisted we 356 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:16,240 Speaker 2: start working out arrangements for the venue. 357 00:17:16,359 --> 00:17:20,760 Speaker 1: That's even weirder. This is Sam's weird. Why are you 358 00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:21,280 Speaker 1: doing that? 359 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,240 Speaker 2: I told her once again, my mom and sister were 360 00:17:24,280 --> 00:17:26,720 Speaker 2: hosting it, and she told me that she could take 361 00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:30,000 Speaker 2: her advice and let her plan it, because she'd ensure 362 00:17:30,119 --> 00:17:33,280 Speaker 2: that the baby shower would be better if she planned it, 363 00:17:33,359 --> 00:17:36,479 Speaker 2: particularly because she'd been working on the menu. 364 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:42,800 Speaker 3: Guys, she's thinking about the day, don't you understand, she's 365 00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:47,679 Speaker 3: been working on the menu, the caviat She's got it 366 00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:50,199 Speaker 3: like like a bunch of different courses. 367 00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:52,080 Speaker 1: There's gonna be there's. 368 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:56,080 Speaker 2: Gonna be the borders. There's gonna be baby greens, baby 369 00:17:56,520 --> 00:18:01,240 Speaker 2: baby green, there's gonna be baby Keisha's that a thing. 370 00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:01,960 Speaker 1: I don't know. 371 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:06,320 Speaker 2: Whether it was pregnancy hormones or just bottled uprage. I 372 00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:08,520 Speaker 2: told her that the job she'd been making at me 373 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:11,800 Speaker 2: behind my back about my diet during this pregnancy to 374 00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:15,720 Speaker 2: my husband are really annoying, and that no, she cannot 375 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:19,160 Speaker 2: host this shower and from now on, her unsolicited advice 376 00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:22,639 Speaker 2: was not appreciated, especially if she can't say it to 377 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,159 Speaker 2: my face. Yeah, say to my face. 378 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:25,680 Speaker 1: Tell her. 379 00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:30,440 Speaker 2: Oh that night, my husband's phone blew up with messages 380 00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:33,880 Speaker 2: from Sam saying that he had no right to show 381 00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:36,760 Speaker 2: her those messages and that they were just supposed to 382 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:40,639 Speaker 2: be health tips because Sam was studying nutritional science and 383 00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:43,280 Speaker 2: only wanted to help her best friend and ensure a 384 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:44,440 Speaker 2: happy baby in life. 385 00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:47,040 Speaker 1: That's so funny. You have no right to show her 386 00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:50,320 Speaker 1: the texts that are about her and our advice for her. 387 00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:55,719 Speaker 2: Yeah, how dare you? How freaking Derek? Honestly, I don't know. 388 00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:58,960 Speaker 2: I know she had somewhat good intentions and she's been 389 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:02,000 Speaker 2: a good friend to my husband and me. So am 390 00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,240 Speaker 2: I the A hole? We have some relevant comments, but 391 00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:08,679 Speaker 2: let's stop right here. I'm rolling right to saying that 392 00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:09,840 Speaker 2: Opie is not the A hole. 393 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:14,399 Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna roll right in there with you say, Ope, 394 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:17,040 Speaker 1: you're not the a hole. But this Sam's a stinker. 395 00:19:17,119 --> 00:19:20,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, this Sam character, this quote unquote. 396 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:23,520 Speaker 1: Sam character, is not it. I don't like them. 397 00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:28,280 Speaker 2: Not it. My up newly updated conspiracy theory is that 398 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:34,120 Speaker 2: Sam was biding her time or she always had these 399 00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:38,320 Speaker 2: like it was very like undercurrent underlying feelings to usurp 400 00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,680 Speaker 2: the throne, trying to usurp the throne, like feeling these 401 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,159 Speaker 2: feelings for Opie's husband, And as soon as the baby 402 00:19:43,359 --> 00:19:46,080 Speaker 2: showed up, that was when it was like, Okay, now 403 00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:49,560 Speaker 2: I need to really like start like weazling my way 404 00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,680 Speaker 2: at first innocent means of, oh, I'll give you nutritional 405 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:55,960 Speaker 2: advice for the baby, and then it's like, wait a second, 406 00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:58,480 Speaker 2: I'm giving you all the advice. Maybe I should mother 407 00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:07,439 Speaker 2: the baby myself. Whose donation dance is this we have 408 00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:09,080 Speaker 2: for this? 409 00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,560 Speaker 1: I did it earlier for Daddy Jesse. 410 00:20:11,760 --> 00:20:14,960 Speaker 2: Yeah we had. Oh no, I thought it was the 411 00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:16,119 Speaker 2: carry of the baby, right. 412 00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:18,040 Speaker 1: That was King Frederick's. 413 00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:20,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe this can be maybe this could be King 414 00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:23,280 Speaker 2: Frederick for like a crown. Oh anyways, but I can 415 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,560 Speaker 2: see that. Yeah, this Sam is definitely the whole. Yeah, 416 00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:29,560 Speaker 2: and should they go no contact with Sam? I'm personally 417 00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:34,399 Speaker 2: right now leaning more towards contact that because or just 418 00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:38,920 Speaker 2: like towards stepping Maybe it's like yeah, low maybe it's 419 00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:41,639 Speaker 2: low contact where it's like, hey, I'm not I'm not 420 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:42,880 Speaker 2: blocking you. 421 00:20:42,840 --> 00:20:45,680 Speaker 1: But like your behavior is not okay. Yeah, to sort 422 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:48,560 Speaker 1: that out, otherwise you're gone. 423 00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:51,080 Speaker 2: This person has been a good friend at minim to 424 00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:54,000 Speaker 2: the husband thus far, but it's like you're you're she 425 00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:58,760 Speaker 2: hasn't directly talked crap about OPI, but no, it's it's there, 426 00:20:58,880 --> 00:20:59,280 Speaker 2: it's there. 427 00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:02,520 Speaker 1: I think it's just like you know, you're too controlling 428 00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:06,120 Speaker 1: you either or like, yeah, you're either going to fix 429 00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 1: your attitude or you're gone. 430 00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,359 Speaker 2: Do you yeah? Do we do we actually? So do 431 00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:12,280 Speaker 2: we tell her those things? Or do you kind of 432 00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:14,160 Speaker 2: just like slowly kind of. 433 00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:16,679 Speaker 1: I think that I think that if this is the 434 00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,479 Speaker 1: husband's like good, longtime best friend, then I think he 435 00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:21,600 Speaker 1: could have that conversation say hey. 436 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:23,720 Speaker 2: I agree with that these are the facts. That's the 437 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:32,359 Speaker 2: only when talk to you anyways, too freaking too freaking bad, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, anyways, guys, 438 00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:35,240 Speaker 2: we have more relevant comments. 439 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:37,720 Speaker 1: Oh relevant? How relevant? 440 00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:42,480 Speaker 2: Duck Smith Quacker says, not the a hole Sam overstepped 441 00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:45,560 Speaker 2: massively to the point where it's clear that she has 442 00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:48,520 Speaker 2: more than platonic feelings for your husband. If Sam truly 443 00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,440 Speaker 2: was your friend, she would one directly text you to 444 00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:54,600 Speaker 2: listen to you. Three, understand that advice doesn't have to 445 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,480 Speaker 2: be taken for, or not make this about her. In five, 446 00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:00,920 Speaker 2: not be upset when you get shown the advice that's 447 00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:03,280 Speaker 2: meant for you, that is that is such a great price. 448 00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:06,760 Speaker 2: Why'd you show her this advice that I'm trying. 449 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:08,720 Speaker 1: To, Yeah that I'm trying to Why send. 450 00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:12,440 Speaker 2: The advice it's clear that Sam doesn't understand that there 451 00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:15,040 Speaker 2: needs to be boundaries in the friendship. You and your 452 00:22:15,119 --> 00:22:18,000 Speaker 2: husband have to be firm about what those boundaries are. 453 00:22:18,119 --> 00:22:20,000 Speaker 2: This can't be a you thing or a hymn thing. 454 00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:23,560 Speaker 2: You have to be united on this united front. However, 455 00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:27,840 Speaker 2: though Defia's earlier point, I think that the maybe be 456 00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:31,560 Speaker 2: united on the stance, but have the husband. I think 457 00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:37,639 Speaker 2: this is kind of Yes, the husband's realm to yeah, speak. 458 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:40,480 Speaker 1: Upon yeah, if he even wants to maintain this, if 459 00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:40,920 Speaker 1: they if. 460 00:22:40,840 --> 00:22:42,760 Speaker 2: They even want to maintain because yeah, I think again, 461 00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:44,600 Speaker 2: it's like, okay, if she's been such a good for 462 00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:46,440 Speaker 2: you for all this time, I think, hey, if you 463 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:47,800 Speaker 2: could like talk to her about it because you have 464 00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:50,760 Speaker 2: the closer friendship, but also be the one because you're closer, 465 00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:52,760 Speaker 2: also be the one to tell her like, hey, we 466 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:54,720 Speaker 2: need to put some boundaries in place. Calm it down, 467 00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:56,400 Speaker 2: calm simmer down. 468 00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:59,280 Speaker 1: Simon yourself down because you're bubbling over. 469 00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:03,919 Speaker 2: But we have an update, ladies and gentlemen. Hi everyone, First, 470 00:23:03,960 --> 00:23:06,199 Speaker 2: I just want to thank you for all your support. Truly, 471 00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:09,320 Speaker 2: it means the world. Hubby and I phoned Sam today 472 00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:12,119 Speaker 2: and talk to her about the issues we were having 473 00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:13,720 Speaker 2: with how she was acting. 474 00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:15,520 Speaker 1: Okay, this is exactly what we said. 475 00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:19,200 Speaker 2: There we go. Well they both did, which is low 476 00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:21,400 Speaker 2: ki kind of kind Ultimately it is kind of better. 477 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,000 Speaker 2: I don't think it's like Opie's duty, but it's good 478 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,720 Speaker 2: that they're doing it. Yeah. Well, and in the sense 479 00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:28,960 Speaker 2: that we said to talk to her first, indeed, dude, 480 00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:31,960 Speaker 2: I explained that I was very uncomfortable with the fact 481 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,560 Speaker 2: that she had been texting my husband, not me, about 482 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:37,760 Speaker 2: my pregnancy and eating habits, and that when she assumed 483 00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:41,240 Speaker 2: she would be granted secrecy and she wasn't, she got mad. 484 00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,639 Speaker 2: Sam explained that in the moment, it seemed like a 485 00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:46,159 Speaker 2: good idea not to text me directly in case she 486 00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:49,479 Speaker 2: overstepped and made me mad. So she was hoping that 487 00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:52,560 Speaker 2: if she explained things to my husband, he would be 488 00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:56,600 Speaker 2: able to relay that info to me casually. Do we 489 00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:57,160 Speaker 2: believe her? 490 00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 3: Mmm? 491 00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:03,720 Speaker 2: I mean that is it does sound plausible. Yeah, could 492 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:06,199 Speaker 2: be true, because there I think there could be instances 493 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:07,760 Speaker 2: where it's like, hey, you're closer to this person. 494 00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:11,080 Speaker 1: I just felt more comfortable bringing it to my friend. 495 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,560 Speaker 2: Hey, like, here's the thing. I think it'll be helpful, 496 00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:15,160 Speaker 2: but let me pass it to you so you can 497 00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:16,919 Speaker 2: be the judge of if it should be shared and 498 00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:17,800 Speaker 2: how it should be shared. 499 00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:21,800 Speaker 1: That's true, that's true. Did she ever maybe I'm misrumming, 500 00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,800 Speaker 1: did she ever send anything to OPI directly? 501 00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:26,320 Speaker 2: Not about the pregnancies? 502 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:26,960 Speaker 1: Okay, okay. 503 00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:30,000 Speaker 2: She assured me that she just wanted to help protect 504 00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:33,000 Speaker 2: and nurture the baby, and to that, I said that 505 00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:39,159 Speaker 2: this isn't her baby. Yeah, that that that last sentence. 506 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:42,080 Speaker 2: She wanted to make sure she returned to protected and mature. 507 00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:43,880 Speaker 2: That sounds like. 508 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:45,480 Speaker 1: You're trying to step in. 509 00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:48,120 Speaker 2: Sounds like this trying to wiggle in. I am perfectly 510 00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:51,320 Speaker 2: capable of making sure the baby is healthy. She apologized 511 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:54,359 Speaker 2: and explained that she truly only thought she was doing something. 512 00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:55,480 Speaker 1: It worked. 513 00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,359 Speaker 2: Husband and I explained we are just going to distance 514 00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:01,960 Speaker 2: ourselves a bit because it's situation had not only made 515 00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:05,040 Speaker 2: me uncomfortable. Husband also said that he needs to focus 516 00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:08,240 Speaker 2: on his wife right now and Sam needs to take 517 00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:11,280 Speaker 2: a back seat. Okay, w Husband, another good point. 518 00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:12,760 Speaker 1: Husband. 519 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:15,720 Speaker 2: I don't think she was overly happy with this, but 520 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:19,360 Speaker 2: she said okay. She asked if she was still invited 521 00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:22,240 Speaker 2: to the baby shower, and Hubby said it may be 522 00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:25,399 Speaker 2: best that she skips it, but I explained, if she 523 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:29,479 Speaker 2: wants her invitation, it's still valid and she is welcome. 524 00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:33,000 Speaker 1: Okay. But I honestly love that response because the husband 525 00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:37,320 Speaker 1: is showing that he's taking his wife's side over the 526 00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:41,960 Speaker 1: best friends yes, and also then giving ope the opportunity 527 00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:43,960 Speaker 1: to say, you know what, actually no, I'm okay with 528 00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:46,520 Speaker 1: her coming. I think that was the exact correct response. 529 00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,199 Speaker 2: Do I hear a W husband? 530 00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,440 Speaker 1: I think we hear W husband, guys. 531 00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:56,280 Speaker 2: W husband's in the chat. Sam did text me after 532 00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:58,920 Speaker 2: the phone call asking if we could meet for coffee. 533 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:00,760 Speaker 2: So I am seeing her tomorrow. 534 00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:01,280 Speaker 1: Okay. 535 00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:04,360 Speaker 2: I will update you guys on how that goes. Honestly, 536 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:07,480 Speaker 2: I think she was just misguided. She's not a bad 537 00:26:07,520 --> 00:26:13,119 Speaker 2: person at heart. Thanks. We have more so the husband 538 00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:16,000 Speaker 2: tron's Hello husband here. I won't give out my name 539 00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:18,240 Speaker 2: for privacy reasons, but I managed to convince my wife 540 00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:20,440 Speaker 2: to allow me to come to here and post after 541 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,359 Speaker 2: reading all your comments, which thank you for all the 542 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:25,080 Speaker 2: kind and not so kind words. My wife and I 543 00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:26,960 Speaker 2: love each other very much, and for that reason, we 544 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:30,600 Speaker 2: are deciding to go low contact on something that could 545 00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:33,560 Speaker 2: possibly jeopardize her mental health. That being his wife's I 546 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:36,520 Speaker 2: do not want to put her under any undue stress. 547 00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:39,760 Speaker 2: And honestly, Sam is not and will never be more 548 00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:44,639 Speaker 2: important than my wife w husband. Please, I don't really 549 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:47,160 Speaker 2: know what else to say to let out a little secret. 550 00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:50,000 Speaker 2: My wife has been loving, how kind and supportive you 551 00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:52,960 Speaker 2: all have been, and call up pregnancy hormones, but she's 552 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:56,200 Speaker 2: starting to tear up a little. Also. Yes, I have 553 00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:59,719 Speaker 2: read comments about Sam and I laughing emoji. No, I 554 00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:04,600 Speaker 2: have won't and will never wouldn't dream of cheating on 555 00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:08,640 Speaker 2: my wife, husband and soon to be dad, our. 556 00:27:08,560 --> 00:27:14,360 Speaker 1: Christian fragnant, fragrant fellow, fragrance of fellows. 557 00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:19,479 Speaker 2: Gee, do I want a literal expert who does this 558 00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:21,800 Speaker 2: for a living and has many people who can attest 559 00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,879 Speaker 2: their to their success and knowledge or to you looking 560 00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:27,760 Speaker 2: up facts in your nutritional general nutrition. 561 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:29,640 Speaker 1: You haven't even finished school yet. 562 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:31,080 Speaker 2: I don't know. 563 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:37,320 Speaker 1: He's pretty difficult. Alright, Well, we do have another story 564 00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:38,080 Speaker 1: hit us