1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:02,080 Speaker 1: More More, More, More Better. 2 00:00:02,560 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 2: Hi, everyone, producer isis here. I have some very cool 3 00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:10,520 Speaker 2: news to share before we jump into today's episode, More 4 00:00:10,520 --> 00:00:13,440 Speaker 2: Better with Stephanie and Melissa has been named a finalist 5 00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:17,279 Speaker 2: in four categories at the Signal Awards. We're up for 6 00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:22,520 Speaker 2: Best Comedy Episode for our vindication episode with the amazing 7 00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:27,920 Speaker 2: Chelsea Peretti, plus Advice and how To Diversity, Equity and 8 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:33,080 Speaker 2: Inclusion and Buddy Podcast. We're so grateful to be recognized 9 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:36,520 Speaker 2: alongside so many talented creators, and we couldn't have done 10 00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:38,680 Speaker 2: this without you, our listeners. 11 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,720 Speaker 3: So here's where you come in. 12 00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:45,159 Speaker 2: There's a Listener's Choice Award in each of our four categories, 13 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:47,720 Speaker 2: which means you can vote for us four times. 14 00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 3: Here's how it works. 15 00:00:49,880 --> 00:00:53,600 Speaker 2: Head to vote dot Signal Award dot com. That's v 16 00:00:53,760 --> 00:00:58,040 Speaker 2: O T E, dot S I G N A l 17 00:00:58,640 --> 00:01:03,520 Speaker 2: A w a rd dot com. Search for More Better 18 00:01:03,920 --> 00:01:06,679 Speaker 2: and you'll see us pop up in four categories. 19 00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:08,320 Speaker 3: Click into each. 20 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,920 Speaker 2: Category one by one and cast your vote. 21 00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:12,520 Speaker 3: Voting is open. 22 00:01:12,319 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 2: Through October ninth, and it takes just a couple of 23 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:17,759 Speaker 2: minutes to support us in all four We would be 24 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:19,240 Speaker 2: so honored and. 25 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:21,000 Speaker 4: Grateful for your votes. 26 00:01:21,880 --> 00:01:25,919 Speaker 2: Thank you, so much for being the best listeners ever. 27 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:29,440 Speaker 2: Now let's get into the show. 28 00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:37,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, thumbs up from Sophie and her hot hot computer, 29 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:38,800 Speaker 1: her Jacob Elordy. 30 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,679 Speaker 4: Computer, her jacob Alordi computer. 31 00:01:41,959 --> 00:01:45,800 Speaker 1: It's call your laptop Jacob Alordi because it's so doesn't. 32 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:46,280 Speaker 3: Even have to talk. 33 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 4: Sephanie loves a tall boy, a tall drink of water. 34 00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:52,040 Speaker 1: Yes, you should have seen me at the US Open. 35 00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:56,400 Speaker 4: I'm like shaking, oh my hands in your element. 36 00:01:56,880 --> 00:01:59,480 Speaker 1: Sorry, we're recording that you can use that, you can 37 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:03,240 Speaker 1: use it. Here we go, guys, we watched the trailer 38 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:04,200 Speaker 1: for Wuthering Heights. 39 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:04,520 Speaker 4: Anyway. 40 00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 3: Welcome to More Better. 41 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:15,440 Speaker 2: More Better, More. 42 00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 3: Better. 43 00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:26,520 Speaker 1: Welcome to More Better, a podcast where we stop pretending 44 00:02:26,639 --> 00:02:29,280 Speaker 1: to have it all together and start getting real about 45 00:02:29,639 --> 00:02:31,400 Speaker 1: how little we know about everything. 46 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,360 Speaker 4: Yeah, we're just trying to get by day. 47 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:36,320 Speaker 3: Is that our tagline? 48 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:43,520 Speaker 1: Day? I can't remember? Anyway, How are you doing? I'm great? 49 00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:44,160 Speaker 3: How are you? 50 00:02:45,760 --> 00:02:48,040 Speaker 1: Let's not pretend we didn't just record. We also just 51 00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:51,520 Speaker 1: recorded a different episode, guys, so we have been talking 52 00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:54,480 Speaker 1: to each other. Let's discuss what we were just watching, 53 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:58,520 Speaker 1: which is the Margot Robie, Robbie and Jacoba Loordi trailer 54 00:02:58,560 --> 00:02:59,560 Speaker 1: to Wuthering Heights. 55 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:02,920 Speaker 4: Robby, I don't actually that trailer made me realize that 56 00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:08,200 Speaker 4: I don't remember the storyline to Wavering Heights, or it's 57 00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:11,720 Speaker 4: just so goddamn different that it didn't trigger anything for me. 58 00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:13,920 Speaker 3: I feel like it's very different. 59 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:16,440 Speaker 1: I feel like it's an a a loose adaptation. 60 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:21,080 Speaker 4: You know, a lot, a lot of looseness in that trailer, 61 00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:21,720 Speaker 4: I'll tell you that. 62 00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:26,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, a lot of a lot of tightening happening. I 63 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,760 Speaker 1: think there's probably gonna be some naughtiness. There were some 64 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:32,640 Speaker 1: images of eggs, probably to have to do with like 65 00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:35,800 Speaker 1: fertility and Wathering Heights was a good book. It was 66 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:38,640 Speaker 1: very romantic. That's what I remember. I'm gonna reread it. 67 00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:41,880 Speaker 1: I feel like the trailer for the movie was very 68 00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:44,119 Speaker 1: horny as opposed to a romantic. 69 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:46,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm not mad at it. Though they can be both. 70 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:49,040 Speaker 3: It can be both. Romance can be honey and. 71 00:03:49,080 --> 00:03:52,800 Speaker 1: Vice versa, vice versa, vice versa, which is correct? 72 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:56,920 Speaker 3: I don't know vice versa. I think vice versa. Anyway. 73 00:03:56,960 --> 00:03:59,200 Speaker 1: I'll go see it in Valentine's Day, Honey, I will 74 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:02,400 Speaker 1: be in line and Opening Night in my bottles. 75 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:03,920 Speaker 4: Should we make it a girls' night. 76 00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:06,160 Speaker 1: We absolutely should. We have to get we have to 77 00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:10,880 Speaker 1: get all dressed up like it's ren Fair to get 78 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:14,160 Speaker 1: calls new We have to, we have to know, we 79 00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:16,600 Speaker 1: have to. Oh my god, now we have to. I'm 80 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:19,159 Speaker 1: obsessed with this idea. Guys, please join us in theaters 81 00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 1: across the country. We're not in this movie. We're not 82 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:24,240 Speaker 1: in it. We have nothing, we have nothing to do, 83 00:04:24,279 --> 00:04:26,680 Speaker 1: we have nothing to do with it. We're just excited 84 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:29,800 Speaker 1: for it to come out. And you know, just see 85 00:04:30,839 --> 00:04:33,640 Speaker 1: Jacob Lordy not wait Town, put. 86 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:36,839 Speaker 4: On some ren fair outfits. Oh my gosh, that tall 87 00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:42,919 Speaker 4: drink of water, and be uncomfortable watching erotica in a 88 00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:43,919 Speaker 4: theater full of women. 89 00:04:45,279 --> 00:04:50,680 Speaker 1: It's my favorite place to watch erotica. Guys, we're what 90 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:53,360 Speaker 1: have you done lately between now and the last time 91 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:53,760 Speaker 1: we talked? 92 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:54,480 Speaker 3: It's more better. 93 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:57,320 Speaker 4: Well, you know, I got a mammogram today. 94 00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,000 Speaker 3: What you got a mammogram? 95 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:02,040 Speaker 4: So I got my I got my titty squeeze. Speaking 96 00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:05,000 Speaker 4: of erotica, the. 97 00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:09,480 Speaker 3: Least, the least erotic thing that you can do, I will. 98 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:12,560 Speaker 4: Actually I do have a funny I guess funny story. 99 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:15,440 Speaker 4: It was this is very If you know me, you're 100 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:18,440 Speaker 4: like of course this happened to you, Melissa Famero. So 101 00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 4: I'm wearing this little cute, little cotton T shirt dress, right, 102 00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:25,279 Speaker 4: and I go for my mammogram. And here's the thing. 103 00:05:25,480 --> 00:05:27,960 Speaker 4: I think when I first made an appointment, I like 104 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:32,680 Speaker 4: went between these two places and maybe couldn't get an 105 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:34,800 Speaker 4: appointment at one and went to another one. And then 106 00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:37,320 Speaker 4: but the one that I couldn't get an appointment with 107 00:05:37,839 --> 00:05:40,240 Speaker 4: set me a reminder like it's time to schedule a mammogram, 108 00:05:40,279 --> 00:05:42,200 Speaker 4: and I was like, okay. So I walked into this 109 00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:43,960 Speaker 4: place and I was like, this isn't where I went before. 110 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 4: And I was like, have I been here before? But 111 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:50,359 Speaker 4: I've been to that building because it's like a medical building, 112 00:05:50,440 --> 00:05:54,080 Speaker 4: so I was it was all very confusing anyway. So 113 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:55,719 Speaker 4: she brings me to the dressing room and she's like, 114 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 4: your gown's in there. Gives me you know, they say 115 00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:59,480 Speaker 4: this like a million times a day, and then my 116 00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:01,960 Speaker 4: appointment like in the afternoon, and so she's going through 117 00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:05,200 Speaker 4: it kind of quickly, and I'm half listening because I'm 118 00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:06,440 Speaker 4: in my mind still thinking. 119 00:06:06,279 --> 00:06:07,520 Speaker 3: Is this the place I went to before? 120 00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:10,720 Speaker 4: Yeah? So then I go in and I look and 121 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:13,760 Speaker 4: it's not a gown, but a shirt that they give you, 122 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:18,880 Speaker 4: and I'm wearing a dress, so it is a shirt 123 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:22,440 Speaker 4: that ends at your waist and I'm wearing a dress. 124 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 3: Okay, so now I'm. 125 00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:27,440 Speaker 1: Not I know what I would do, but I can't 126 00:06:27,480 --> 00:06:30,800 Speaker 1: wait to hear what you did. 127 00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:36,320 Speaker 4: So I'm standing there paralyzed, thinking do I put this 128 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:40,480 Speaker 4: shirt on and go out in my thong and just 129 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:45,560 Speaker 4: act like this is normal? Or do I figure out 130 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:49,240 Speaker 4: how to wrap this dress around my waist. So what 131 00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:53,800 Speaker 4: I end up doing is I the neckline of this 132 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:57,680 Speaker 4: dress is a little was a little high, and I'm like, 133 00:06:57,800 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 4: I don't know if I can squeeze my shoulders and 134 00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:03,880 Speaker 4: arms through this. But I was like, what choice do 135 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,840 Speaker 4: you have, bitch, because how are you going to tie 136 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:11,600 Speaker 4: this leaveless T shirt dress around your waist? Like that 137 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:14,960 Speaker 4: makes no sense, and also you can't walk out into 138 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:19,080 Speaker 4: the hallway with your ass out that also seems crazy. 139 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:25,320 Speaker 4: So I stretched the neck and squeezed my arms through 140 00:07:25,360 --> 00:07:28,160 Speaker 4: it and left it around my waist. 141 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:29,440 Speaker 3: Like a little skirt. 142 00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:33,080 Speaker 4: Yep, like a little skirt. But while all this was happening, 143 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:38,000 Speaker 4: the woman was like Melissa. I was like, oh, yes, 144 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:41,000 Speaker 4: one minute, because I'm taking far longer than all the 145 00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:43,240 Speaker 4: other women take to just take off a goddamn shirt 146 00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:46,440 Speaker 4: and put on that god wrap shirt thing that they 147 00:07:46,480 --> 00:07:48,400 Speaker 4: give you that you end up taking off in the 148 00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:52,080 Speaker 4: room anyway, Right, Yeah, So that's that's what I did. 149 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:55,760 Speaker 4: So then I left thinking, how do I remind myself 150 00:07:55,960 --> 00:08:00,440 Speaker 4: next year to not wear a dress, wear pain ladies essay, 151 00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:05,960 Speaker 4: wear pants or shorts or skirt to your mammogram appointment, because. 152 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:06,440 Speaker 1: You gotta. 153 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:11,560 Speaker 3: When you put well. 154 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:15,920 Speaker 4: I obviously wasn't thinking about the logistics of the appointment, 155 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:19,720 Speaker 4: and I think maybe I just thought it was like 156 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:23,680 Speaker 4: a gown, But then that doesn't make sense. 157 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:26,000 Speaker 1: I just do you think about it, have asked for 158 00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:27,640 Speaker 1: a gown? You probably could have asked for a gown, 159 00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:28,200 Speaker 1: but you were like. 160 00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:34,880 Speaker 3: I'm gonna make this work. This warning it's. 161 00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:38,319 Speaker 4: When my people pleasing like good, good girl, good student, 162 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:41,480 Speaker 4: beside of my personality comes out that I think is 163 00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:43,960 Speaker 4: like healed and like gone. And then I'm in a 164 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:46,079 Speaker 4: doctor's office and they're calling my name and I'm like, 165 00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:48,880 Speaker 4: god damn it, squeezing the dress down to my waist 166 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,439 Speaker 4: to make this work. I can't ask for anything. I'm up. 167 00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,920 Speaker 4: I'm up next the reality busy. You could have been like, 168 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,160 Speaker 4: I'm sorry, I just didn't think I wore a dress. 169 00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:59,040 Speaker 4: I just didn't thank you. I could have. 170 00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:01,319 Speaker 5: It. 171 00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:03,200 Speaker 4: We have down here building them. 172 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:03,600 Speaker 3: Sure I can. 173 00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:06,000 Speaker 4: So we have little like medical pants for you to 174 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:09,560 Speaker 4: throw on, like yeah, probably, but Nope. Instead, my anxiety 175 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:10,400 Speaker 4: just went make it work. 176 00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:14,280 Speaker 3: I've I've left. 177 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:17,240 Speaker 1: I've definitely been there before where I'm like, oh no, 178 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:20,200 Speaker 1: I've worn the wrong thing, you know, or like they'll 179 00:09:20,679 --> 00:09:23,080 Speaker 1: they'll be like, please strip down to your underwear and 180 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:24,840 Speaker 1: I'm like, what don't wear I need today? 181 00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:29,959 Speaker 4: So so yeah, but I get to know each other 182 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:30,960 Speaker 4: good real quick. 183 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 3: I've asked. 184 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,200 Speaker 1: Since then, I've been like sometimes I'm like, do you 185 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:37,880 Speaker 1: have any of those paper phons that I could have? 186 00:09:38,080 --> 00:09:40,920 Speaker 3: And they're like sure, I'm glad you wouldn't. Got your 187 00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:41,439 Speaker 3: mamma Grandma. 188 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,720 Speaker 1: That reminds me I needed to get my mammogram and 189 00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:45,040 Speaker 1: a colonoscopy. 190 00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:50,959 Speaker 4: Honey, girls, schedule doctor's appointments? Is that time a year. 191 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:54,120 Speaker 1: It's time for the colonoscopy. I don't want to do it, 192 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:58,400 Speaker 1: but I also don't want to have something wrong. 193 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:00,520 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you got to do it. 194 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:02,880 Speaker 1: No important, I gotta do it it's got I gotta do it. 195 00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:03,640 Speaker 3: Do it. 196 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,840 Speaker 4: You gotta do it. You gotta drink the bad drink. 197 00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:06,839 Speaker 3: You've done it. 198 00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:08,120 Speaker 4: I haven't done it yet. 199 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:13,000 Speaker 1: Okay, all right, well full report? Yeah, please all full 200 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:17,079 Speaker 1: report when I get it. Yeah, I'm I'm probably due 201 00:10:17,080 --> 00:10:19,160 Speaker 1: for that soon this year, next year. 202 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:19,720 Speaker 4: I don't know. 203 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:20,600 Speaker 3: I feel like. 204 00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: They've up, they've upped the I used to be forty 205 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:25,480 Speaker 1: five that you needed to get a cool and mask, 206 00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:26,480 Speaker 1: and now it's forty. 207 00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,640 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I do need. 208 00:10:29,679 --> 00:10:33,400 Speaker 1: My general practitioner told me so shit, So I got 209 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:34,200 Speaker 1: a schedule mine. 210 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:42,600 Speaker 3: Okay, more better. Today we're talking about bodies. 211 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:47,520 Speaker 4: Today's topic is from a listener from Joetta. Let's roll 212 00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 4: the tape as they say. 213 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:55,320 Speaker 5: Hey guys, my name is Joetta. I absolutely love your podcast. 214 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:59,320 Speaker 5: To be completely honest, I've never been a podcast person. 215 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:02,240 Speaker 5: I always feel like it's background noise, I can't pay attention, 216 00:11:02,559 --> 00:11:05,240 Speaker 5: and it's just like a waste of time. But I 217 00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:09,600 Speaker 5: heard about your guys' podcast and I watch Brooklyn nine 218 00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:13,040 Speaker 5: nine on repeat. Absolutely love you guys on the show. 219 00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:14,520 Speaker 5: So I was like, you know what, I'm going to 220 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:17,040 Speaker 5: take a chance. So what I would like to be 221 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:20,160 Speaker 5: more better at is loving my body for the way 222 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:23,079 Speaker 5: it is. I have gone through a lot of health issues. 223 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:27,320 Speaker 5: I've been diagnosed with endometriosis and public floor dysfunction, and 224 00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:29,880 Speaker 5: my body's just not the way it was and I 225 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:32,120 Speaker 5: don't think it ever will be. And it's been really 226 00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:35,800 Speaker 5: hard to accept that and look at myself and love myself. 227 00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:38,320 Speaker 5: And I remember in past episodes you guys were talking 228 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:41,760 Speaker 5: about that that you get maybe gone through similar things, 229 00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 5: and that like you have your styles tailored to how 230 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 5: you are and you just don't need those toxic resolutions 231 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:53,000 Speaker 5: of being weighing less and all this kind of stuff. 232 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 5: And I just would love some advice or tips and tricks, 233 00:11:57,040 --> 00:11:59,679 Speaker 5: as you guys say, to love my body for how 234 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:03,440 Speaker 5: it is and accepting it and maybe tailoring my style 235 00:12:03,520 --> 00:12:08,120 Speaker 5: towards it. So any advice would be helpful. I absolutely 236 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,720 Speaker 5: love you guys. Thank you so much for making this podcast, 237 00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:12,880 Speaker 5: and I can't wait to hear about it. 238 00:12:13,360 --> 00:12:20,800 Speaker 4: Iii Ah, She's our little bibe Joeta did the Bie 239 00:12:21,679 --> 00:12:24,200 Speaker 4: Joe up. Thank you for all those nice things you said. 240 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:28,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, and also, like, as someone his body's changed a lot, 241 00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:31,720 Speaker 1: I feel you, dude, It's so it's like it's so 242 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,920 Speaker 1: weird because you're like you're seventeen, you're like, okay, cool, 243 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 1: this is it. And then you're seeing me too, and 244 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 1: it's like, oh no, this is it. And then you're 245 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:40,800 Speaker 1: twenty six and you're like, oh okay, this is it. 246 00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:43,880 Speaker 1: And then you're thirty and it just keeps happening. It's 247 00:12:43,920 --> 00:12:45,840 Speaker 1: like it just keeps happening because your body does keep 248 00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:51,640 Speaker 1: shifting and changing, and it's like it's such a mind fuck, 249 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:55,640 Speaker 1: and we're here to help you kind of like talk 250 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,160 Speaker 1: at least talk some stuff out, like think it out, 251 00:12:58,280 --> 00:12:59,120 Speaker 1: think it out. 252 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,440 Speaker 4: Think it out. That's what we do here. We think 253 00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:01,960 Speaker 4: things out. 254 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:03,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, we talk about and we think it out. 255 00:13:04,280 --> 00:13:06,800 Speaker 1: It was basically about having a body, right, Like this 256 00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:09,880 Speaker 1: episode is about having a body and having a body, 257 00:13:10,160 --> 00:13:12,960 Speaker 1: what that means to each of us and how we're 258 00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,600 Speaker 1: kind of like our personal. 259 00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:19,200 Speaker 3: Versions of that. What it is now might. 260 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,560 Speaker 1: Be different than what it is next week, what it 261 00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:25,040 Speaker 1: is in a year. Melissa, talk about your experience with 262 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:26,000 Speaker 1: having a body. 263 00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:31,240 Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, Well what you were just what you 264 00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:34,640 Speaker 4: were just saying really struck a chord with me because Yeah, 265 00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:41,439 Speaker 4: like I remember, puberty was a really big, huge fast 266 00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:46,320 Speaker 4: change for me. I was like a skiny, skinny, little 267 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:50,679 Speaker 4: mini thing as a kid, and I was very active 268 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:56,120 Speaker 4: and I danced, and then puberty hit and I grew 269 00:13:56,480 --> 00:14:00,400 Speaker 4: like four or five inches in a year, like got 270 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:03,640 Speaker 4: I got hips and boobs and butt so fast that 271 00:14:03,679 --> 00:14:06,959 Speaker 4: I got stretch marks that I still have to this day. 272 00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:10,839 Speaker 4: And I was like twelve, and I was like, the 273 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:17,120 Speaker 4: fuck are these lions on my hips? Like, and I 274 00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,680 Speaker 4: didn't know how to dress and I felt so self 275 00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:22,440 Speaker 4: conscious and it was just like such a hard and 276 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:27,840 Speaker 4: fast change. And you know, and then like you said, 277 00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:31,120 Speaker 4: like you go through some teen years and you're like, Okay, no, cool, 278 00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:35,280 Speaker 4: the well, no, teen years were rough. Actually, I don't 279 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:39,000 Speaker 4: think I really started to like appreciate my body to 280 00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 4: like college or like twenties. And then I was like 281 00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:49,720 Speaker 4: in a good stride for a while. And then I 282 00:14:49,880 --> 00:14:53,080 Speaker 4: got pregnant and then that was like that kind of 283 00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:56,960 Speaker 4: felt like puberty again, where it was this really fast, 284 00:14:57,240 --> 00:15:01,640 Speaker 4: dramatic change. And I joke that like I think women 285 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:05,040 Speaker 4: have there's like a switch that some of us have 286 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:08,480 Speaker 4: and some don't, where like when you're pregnant, I think 287 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:10,240 Speaker 4: there's a switch that goes off for some women that 288 00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,000 Speaker 4: is like, oh my god, I feel so beautiful and 289 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:14,640 Speaker 4: powerful and like this is amazing and like how crazy 290 00:15:14,720 --> 00:15:17,200 Speaker 4: is this miracle of life? And then for the rest 291 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:20,280 Speaker 4: of us, it's like I feel like a fucking science experiment. 292 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,240 Speaker 4: This is such a sham. I didn't know it's going 293 00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,400 Speaker 4: to be like this. And every time I get used 294 00:15:24,400 --> 00:15:27,640 Speaker 4: to something, something else like dramatically, like you literally you'll 295 00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:29,680 Speaker 4: be like, okay, cool, this is it. I feel like 296 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,640 Speaker 4: maybe cute, pregnant, and then the next day you wake 297 00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:33,560 Speaker 4: up and like five things have changed. 298 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:35,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, like your boobs. 299 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:38,760 Speaker 4: Are like crazy bigger, or like your belly grew or 300 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:42,120 Speaker 4: you're bastard, or your ankles are swolen like whatever. It's 301 00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:45,000 Speaker 4: like every time I felt like I got used to 302 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:49,320 Speaker 4: it or like okay, it would all like dramatically change, yeah, 303 00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:52,840 Speaker 4: and then and then like there's postpartum body, like you know, 304 00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 4: and then it just feels like this roller coaster of 305 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:57,480 Speaker 4: like up and down. And then you're like getting older too, 306 00:15:57,520 --> 00:16:00,760 Speaker 4: and things are shifting, and you know, even where you 307 00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:03,240 Speaker 4: gain or lose weight is different, and like I've had 308 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:06,640 Speaker 4: giant boobs and I've had really small boobs, and like 309 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:13,000 Speaker 4: I feel like I've had giant thighs and like really small. 310 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:15,840 Speaker 4: I've had a thigh gap and I've had no thigh gap, 311 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:24,360 Speaker 4: And so it is this constant bombardment, I think, especially 312 00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:27,440 Speaker 4: as a woman, where you're like trying to feel good 313 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:29,520 Speaker 4: about the body that you have and the things that 314 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:31,560 Speaker 4: it can do and the things that it has done. 315 00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:34,800 Speaker 4: But it feels like every five to ten years it 316 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:38,280 Speaker 4: changes so dramatically that like just when you get to 317 00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:39,400 Speaker 4: the point where you're like. 318 00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:44,440 Speaker 1: I love my body, yeah, fucking perimenopause or like what 319 00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:46,160 Speaker 1: you know, or you get pregnant or like. 320 00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:49,360 Speaker 4: Fucking or you get sick, or you get injured, or 321 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:53,200 Speaker 4: like some fucking shit happens. Yeah, and it's exhausting. 322 00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:59,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, it's exhausting. It's exhausting to sort of the 323 00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:03,080 Speaker 1: the reason it's exhausting is because we're and it's not 324 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:05,040 Speaker 1: just media. Media has a big part in it, right, 325 00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:06,080 Speaker 1: Like media, yea is a. 326 00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:06,800 Speaker 3: Big part in it. 327 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:11,119 Speaker 1: But we are measuring like, oh no, like can I 328 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:11,480 Speaker 1: do this? 329 00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:14,240 Speaker 3: Can I do that? Like is my body? You know? 330 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:19,080 Speaker 1: Like am I still young enough to fall off a 331 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:23,359 Speaker 1: ladder and not break my pelvis? Am I still you know? 332 00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:26,199 Speaker 1: Can I still fall? I mean I remember doing this 333 00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:29,480 Speaker 1: play in my twenties where I was playing Juliet and 334 00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,200 Speaker 1: I had to fall on my knees on this one 335 00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:34,280 Speaker 1: part in the play and they were like, oh, is 336 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,760 Speaker 1: do you want knee pads for under your costume? And 337 00:17:37,760 --> 00:17:39,600 Speaker 1: I was like no, because I was wearing these like 338 00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:42,280 Speaker 1: skinny leggings with like bell bottoms. 339 00:17:42,320 --> 00:17:43,800 Speaker 3: I was like, I don't want to ruin the line 340 00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:45,840 Speaker 3: of my costume. Me mom. 341 00:17:45,920 --> 00:17:47,960 Speaker 1: Now, as a forty four year old, when I go 342 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,600 Speaker 1: up and down the stairs in my house, I can 343 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:53,760 Speaker 1: hear my knees. I can hear them go crunch, crunch, crunch, 344 00:17:54,359 --> 00:17:57,080 Speaker 1: and like they didn't do that then, but they do 345 00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:59,719 Speaker 1: it now, and it's they do it. It's like you 346 00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:05,600 Speaker 1: just it's this like constant battle of like wait, hold on, wait, wait, 347 00:18:05,720 --> 00:18:11,600 Speaker 1: oh no, wait wait. It feels very Yeah, it's exhausting. 348 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:14,000 Speaker 1: It can be exhausting, it can be exlasting. 349 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:19,720 Speaker 4: I will say that there is something about getting older 350 00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:25,200 Speaker 4: and kind of giving less fucks that's been nice when 351 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:30,560 Speaker 4: it comes to my feelings around my body. And you know, 352 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:34,200 Speaker 4: I think especially I've had this in two waves where 353 00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:38,119 Speaker 4: you know, you and I have talked about uh, severe 354 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,800 Speaker 4: body issues that we've had when we were younger. And 355 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:44,960 Speaker 4: issues with dysfunctional eating, and that certainly was the case 356 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:49,199 Speaker 4: for me in high school. And then I had a 357 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:55,360 Speaker 4: friend who landed in the hospital for anorexia, and that 358 00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:58,080 Speaker 4: was like and it was and I and it was 359 00:18:58,200 --> 00:19:00,840 Speaker 4: it was somebody I deeply cared about. But she was 360 00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:02,440 Speaker 4: a little younger than me, so she was still in 361 00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:04,400 Speaker 4: high school when I went to college. This was when 362 00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:07,080 Speaker 4: I went and I was in college, and so I 363 00:19:07,119 --> 00:19:10,720 Speaker 4: hadn't seen her during the thick of this. So this 364 00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:12,560 Speaker 4: is somebody that we went to dance school to get 365 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:15,000 Speaker 4: We danced together, and like we were like still kind 366 00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:19,080 Speaker 4: of in touch, but not as much, yeah, because of 367 00:19:19,119 --> 00:19:25,040 Speaker 4: life and school. And I remember I heard that that 368 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:27,080 Speaker 4: she was very sick and that she had landed in 369 00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:29,280 Speaker 4: the hospital, and then I saw a picture of her, 370 00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:34,960 Speaker 4: and I that shit scared me so deep, my god, 371 00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,840 Speaker 4: because this was someone that was so vibrant and strong 372 00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:43,000 Speaker 4: in my mind, not someone I would ever guessed would 373 00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:47,199 Speaker 4: have gone through this. And it just like shook me 374 00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:50,200 Speaker 4: in a way that my brain just went, what are 375 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:54,639 Speaker 4: you doing? What are you doing? Why are you restricting 376 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:58,960 Speaker 4: food or trying to control or like why you're young, 377 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,280 Speaker 4: you're healthy, You're at the time, I was dancing like 378 00:20:02,359 --> 00:20:07,119 Speaker 4: twenty hours a week, and I just had this moment 379 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:11,600 Speaker 4: of appreciation that I could do all of these things 380 00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:15,280 Speaker 4: physically and that at the same time I had been 381 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:18,720 Speaker 4: making decisions that could potentially lead me down this same 382 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:21,480 Speaker 4: scary road that she went down and trying to understand 383 00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:25,760 Speaker 4: like why I was doing that and being like fucking stop. 384 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:28,440 Speaker 4: Life is short, Like you got to stop, You got 385 00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:34,159 Speaker 4: to turn the ship around. Yeah, and I did, but 386 00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:35,960 Speaker 4: it was hard, and it's. 387 00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:38,080 Speaker 1: I was going to say that I think it speaks 388 00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:43,000 Speaker 1: so like how you how you specifically function as a person, 389 00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:43,720 Speaker 1: which is like. 390 00:20:45,320 --> 00:20:46,520 Speaker 3: You're very tough. 391 00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:49,399 Speaker 1: And I don't know if that's like growing up in 392 00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:52,000 Speaker 1: Jersey or if it's like your parents, or if it's 393 00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:55,320 Speaker 1: your DNA or your genetics, it's just your personality, but 394 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:59,399 Speaker 1: you're very tough. And like I think it's you know, 395 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:02,119 Speaker 1: you saw something and you're like, oh, fuck no, you 396 00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:13,439 Speaker 1: know mm hmm. That is a wake up call to have, 397 00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:16,240 Speaker 1: like a personal friend like struggle with something like that. 398 00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:19,960 Speaker 1: But there's some of us, myself included that, like I 399 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:21,920 Speaker 1: don't know that I would have had the same reaction, 400 00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:25,560 Speaker 1: you know, Like I think that's very a mature place 401 00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,240 Speaker 1: of thinking about like, oh my god, I might not 402 00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:30,439 Speaker 1: be able to do the things that I love to 403 00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:33,760 Speaker 1: do because I could restrict myself so much that I 404 00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,399 Speaker 1: wouldn't have the energy or the strength or like the 405 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:39,720 Speaker 1: wherewithal yeah to do these things that I love. 406 00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:42,040 Speaker 3: Right. The problem I. 407 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,879 Speaker 1: Think sometimes with at least with eating disorder stuff is 408 00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:48,480 Speaker 1: like it becomes the sole focus, Like the everything else 409 00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:51,879 Speaker 1: falls away, you know, and like it doesn't really matter 410 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:56,200 Speaker 1: if you can dance or move or lift or whatever 411 00:21:56,320 --> 00:22:00,439 Speaker 1: because you look thin, you know. Right, It's like the 412 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:04,440 Speaker 1: image becomes everything and the control around the image becomes 413 00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:07,320 Speaker 1: I mean, at least for me, the control was really 414 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:09,520 Speaker 1: where it was at everything in my life felt like 415 00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:11,840 Speaker 1: I don't have any control. I don't have any control. 416 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:13,400 Speaker 1: But at least I can have control over this thing. 417 00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,840 Speaker 1: You know. I don't have control in whether I'm cast. 418 00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:19,399 Speaker 1: I don't have control in how people see me. I 419 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:21,719 Speaker 1: don't have control it for some people like me, but 420 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:24,680 Speaker 1: I can be thin, you know, And it was like, yeah, 421 00:22:24,680 --> 00:22:28,399 Speaker 1: I can control this thing, and like then it starts 422 00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:30,399 Speaker 1: to I mean, at least for me. Again, there's a 423 00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:33,919 Speaker 1: personal These are all personal experiences, but like for me, 424 00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:36,480 Speaker 1: it was like that was the thing that was the 425 00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:41,080 Speaker 1: thing I could control. I couldn't control that. The person 426 00:22:41,119 --> 00:22:43,800 Speaker 1: that I was with probably didn't really love me. I 427 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:48,000 Speaker 1: couldn't control, you know, like that was was the only 428 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:52,240 Speaker 1: thing that I had like real control over and like, yeah, 429 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:55,480 Speaker 1: that's actually a lie. I actually had quite a bit 430 00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:58,640 Speaker 1: of control in my life. I had a lot of choices, like, 431 00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:02,240 Speaker 1: but I wasn't making them. I was too afraid to 432 00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:05,439 Speaker 1: make them. So instead I was like, I'll just have 433 00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:11,240 Speaker 1: popcorn for lunch, you know, yeah, and yeah, and you're 434 00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:15,800 Speaker 1: you're you know, this is a really interesting conversation too 435 00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:18,760 Speaker 1: right now because a lot of people are using different 436 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:24,040 Speaker 1: kinds of drugs that help them lose weight, and you know, 437 00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:27,119 Speaker 1: trying not to have judgment around that can be really tricky. 438 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:34,560 Speaker 1: My dad died from complications around cancer. But one of 439 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:41,000 Speaker 1: the reasons that the cancer like affected him so intensely, 440 00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,520 Speaker 1: and one of the reasons he didn't notice that he 441 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:48,320 Speaker 1: had the cancer was because he was overweight and diabetic 442 00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:52,960 Speaker 1: and wasn't He had a lot of trouble controlling the diabetes. 443 00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:55,359 Speaker 1: He had a lot of like he just had a 444 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,360 Speaker 1: lot of roadblocks for himself, and like something like one 445 00:23:58,359 --> 00:24:01,640 Speaker 1: of these medications could really helped him have a better 446 00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:06,560 Speaker 1: quality of life. So like, there's that side of these medications, right, 447 00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:08,800 Speaker 1: And the other side of these medications is that a 448 00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,560 Speaker 1: lot of people are taking them to become the thinnished 449 00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:16,639 Speaker 1: version of themselves. And that's tricky too. It's like, if 450 00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:18,919 Speaker 1: you've never been a thin person, what is it like 451 00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,480 Speaker 1: to live in a thin body? And how does it feel? 452 00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:24,600 Speaker 1: And like can you become obsessed with that? And like 453 00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:30,800 Speaker 1: when is the obsession kind of like guiding your choices 454 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,240 Speaker 1: in life? And like any like any obsession, I mean, 455 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,639 Speaker 1: if we're talking about bodies in general, it's like any obsession. 456 00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:40,000 Speaker 1: Like there was for a while there was that I 457 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:41,680 Speaker 1: can't remember what it's called, but it was like people 458 00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:44,640 Speaker 1: getting obsessed with like health food and like eating super helpfully. 459 00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:47,440 Speaker 3: H articles are sort of saying like, oh, this is. 460 00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:49,320 Speaker 1: Kind of a new eating disorder, where like oh, I 461 00:24:49,359 --> 00:24:51,320 Speaker 1: don't eat gluten, and I don't eat sugar, and I 462 00:24:51,359 --> 00:24:53,159 Speaker 1: don't eat this, and I don't eat that, and I 463 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:55,919 Speaker 1: don't eat but and I don't eat but and I 464 00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,480 Speaker 1: have a friend who she's she is my health coach, 465 00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:03,680 Speaker 1: and she's amazing and at the time she was. She 466 00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:06,679 Speaker 1: was like in an organization that was kind of a 467 00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:11,719 Speaker 1: churchy vibe but also was very culty, and one of 468 00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:15,560 Speaker 1: the women there accused her of having this disorder and 469 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,840 Speaker 1: it was devastating to my friend because she was, like 470 00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:22,159 Speaker 1: I heard her history was like her dad died of cancer, 471 00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:26,560 Speaker 1: and she was like really trying to make her body 472 00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:31,760 Speaker 1: the most functional and healthy version of herself. And for her, 473 00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:34,359 Speaker 1: that meant avoiding things that made her feel like crap, 474 00:25:35,280 --> 00:25:39,360 Speaker 1: like gluten plugged her up, and like processed sugars made 475 00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:44,399 Speaker 1: her feel crazy inside, and you know, like digesting meat 476 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:47,480 Speaker 1: wasn't really good for her. And when it stopped feeling 477 00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,520 Speaker 1: like for her, when she was like, ooh, I think 478 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,680 Speaker 1: I need extra energy, she added back in like eggs 479 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:52,359 Speaker 1: and fish. 480 00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,720 Speaker 3: It was like it was it was. 481 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:58,080 Speaker 1: Her finding her way through food and trying to utilize 482 00:25:58,119 --> 00:26:02,359 Speaker 1: it as like food for fun and for function, as 483 00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:06,760 Speaker 1: opposed to like food to like you know, self soothe 484 00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:10,239 Speaker 1: or be a bomb or have control or whatever, and 485 00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:10,720 Speaker 1: so like. 486 00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:14,679 Speaker 4: It's all all of it's like all of it's tricky, right, 487 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:17,119 Speaker 4: because like all of it's tricky, and like you were 488 00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:19,840 Speaker 4: like like you were kind of saying, like this body 489 00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:25,960 Speaker 4: mind connection, right like is so strong it's hard to navigate. 490 00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:29,840 Speaker 4: It's hard to right like figure out like, yeah, we 491 00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:37,040 Speaker 4: do use food for comfort and that's also okay, you know, 492 00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:39,600 Speaker 4: and it's but it's like when you're doing it too 493 00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:42,000 Speaker 4: much or when you're doing it too little, and like 494 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,160 Speaker 4: it's all about finding balance. 495 00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:45,680 Speaker 3: Balance. 496 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:53,560 Speaker 4: I'm sorry I said it. Everything in moderation like you 497 00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:58,760 Speaker 4: know is also but like kind of true, you know, 498 00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:05,679 Speaker 4: it's true. It's like, yeah, I currently I feel like 499 00:27:05,760 --> 00:27:08,400 Speaker 4: in the last few years, I have moved more towards 500 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:12,359 Speaker 4: like you were saying, really focusing on food for like 501 00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:19,080 Speaker 4: functionality and like feeling good and noticing like what doesn't 502 00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:21,800 Speaker 4: make me feel great My beloved red wine that I 503 00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,639 Speaker 4: love so much, but also somebody clued me into it 504 00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:27,800 Speaker 4: might be more the cabernet than the pino noir that's 505 00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:31,800 Speaker 4: affecting me. It might be the type of red wines 506 00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:35,960 Speaker 4: that could be. So I'm trying to figure that out 507 00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:38,480 Speaker 4: because I love it so much and I don't want 508 00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:39,200 Speaker 4: to give it up. 509 00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:39,760 Speaker 2: No. 510 00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:43,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, but yeah, like like more you know, food to live, 511 00:27:44,640 --> 00:27:48,439 Speaker 4: food to feel good, food to have energy, but also 512 00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:52,199 Speaker 4: going out and enjoying just all of it, like all 513 00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,440 Speaker 4: the you know what I mean, and like yeah, and 514 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:58,040 Speaker 4: having that bit of balance. Ah. 515 00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:00,919 Speaker 1: You know something that my health coach Jenna says a 516 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:04,800 Speaker 1: lot is like make the choices and then be okay 517 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:08,320 Speaker 1: with the choices, right, and like actually be okay with 518 00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:13,320 Speaker 1: the choices. So it's not it doesn't serve me to 519 00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,440 Speaker 1: go like I'm going to eat this fast food thing 520 00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:19,479 Speaker 1: and then like beat myself up for three days about 521 00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:22,800 Speaker 1: it and then like retroactively try to that I'm just 522 00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:26,400 Speaker 1: gonna have juice, you know, or whatever fucking fucked up thing. 523 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:31,480 Speaker 1: It's like, oh, I have a like slow down, make 524 00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:32,040 Speaker 1: the choice. 525 00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:33,360 Speaker 3: Do I really want that? Yeah? 526 00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,360 Speaker 1: I really want that. That's something that I really want. 527 00:28:35,480 --> 00:28:36,560 Speaker 1: Is it gonna make me feel good? 528 00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:37,000 Speaker 3: Might not? 529 00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:39,560 Speaker 1: Might make me feel good in the moment, might feel 530 00:28:39,680 --> 00:28:42,040 Speaker 1: a little bad later. Am I still gonna choose it? 531 00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:42,440 Speaker 3: Yes? 532 00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:46,640 Speaker 1: So I'm gonna eat it, and yeah, I'm gonna I'm 533 00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:51,800 Speaker 1: gonna deal with, you know, accept whatever that is. 534 00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:52,160 Speaker 3: Right. 535 00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:54,760 Speaker 1: So, like this morning, what did I want? I wanted 536 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:57,360 Speaker 1: a biscuit. And when I'm on the fucking biscuit. 537 00:28:57,680 --> 00:28:59,320 Speaker 4: Fucking love biscuits, man. 538 00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:03,600 Speaker 1: Butter and Jammed really wanted and so I got it. 539 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,040 Speaker 1: And I also knew, like how am I going to 540 00:29:06,080 --> 00:29:08,800 Speaker 1: feel after that biscuit, that big, old, greasy ass biscuit, 541 00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:15,160 Speaker 1: Probably a little slow and like, but I you know, 542 00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,760 Speaker 1: I just wanted it. I was just like I really 543 00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:19,000 Speaker 1: want this biscuit right now. 544 00:29:19,720 --> 00:29:21,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think you're so right. 545 00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:27,360 Speaker 4: There's like more conscious decision making around food choices. 546 00:29:25,880 --> 00:29:29,120 Speaker 1: Or do I want to eat this biscuit that is 547 00:29:29,120 --> 00:29:30,040 Speaker 1: as big as my face? 548 00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:31,480 Speaker 3: Yes? I do. 549 00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:34,480 Speaker 1: How am I going to be conscious about this? 550 00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:35,280 Speaker 3: Yes? 551 00:29:35,520 --> 00:29:39,240 Speaker 1: And that's time too. And it's also like accepting this. 552 00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,760 Speaker 1: This is the thing that I think nobody at least 553 00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:44,200 Speaker 1: not in my family. It was in my family it 554 00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:46,640 Speaker 1: was like, you better finish the food on your plate. 555 00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:50,000 Speaker 1: You cannot leave this table until you finish that food 556 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:52,960 Speaker 1: on your plate. You cannot waste. You cannot waste. And 557 00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,880 Speaker 1: that was partially because we were we didn't have a 558 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:57,680 Speaker 1: lot of money, and so like, yeah, it was not 559 00:29:58,360 --> 00:30:02,480 Speaker 1: there wasn't any There's so many fucked up things that 560 00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:04,560 Speaker 1: like they didn't know, like my mom and dad didn't 561 00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:07,440 Speaker 1: know that by making me finish my plate that like 562 00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:09,720 Speaker 1: I was gonna have years and years of feeling like, 563 00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,400 Speaker 1: oh my god, I feel crazy by throwing this food away, 564 00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:15,880 Speaker 1: I have to yeah on my plate, right yeah, but 565 00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:19,000 Speaker 1: ultimately that's what I still hate throwing food out. I 566 00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:22,200 Speaker 1: get a little I feel, I feel my stress level 567 00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:24,920 Speaker 1: rise a little bit when I'm like throwing food away 568 00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:29,640 Speaker 1: that's left over. How's your relationship with or how have 569 00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:35,200 Speaker 1: you processed just your body being different, because like our 570 00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,400 Speaker 1: bodies just like like you and me, like our bodies 571 00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:41,080 Speaker 1: right now are different than when we first met. It's 572 00:30:41,120 --> 00:30:44,120 Speaker 1: boo boo bits. So I'll tell you that much. I don't. 573 00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:48,440 Speaker 1: There's some things and I'm like, absolutely not. This fucking sucks. 574 00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:51,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, like same yeah. 575 00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:54,600 Speaker 1: Let me give you two examples after I had ros. 576 00:30:56,760 --> 00:30:58,920 Speaker 1: The short story is, the short version of the story 577 00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:01,680 Speaker 1: is there's a there's a chemical that gets released in 578 00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:05,200 Speaker 1: your body when you're pregnant called relaxing that helps your 579 00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:07,520 Speaker 1: bones kind of jelly up a little bit so that 580 00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:11,880 Speaker 1: the kids fit inside your body and so they come out, 581 00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:15,840 Speaker 1: squeeze that baby out. And what it also can do 582 00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:20,280 Speaker 1: is it can make things kind of move around, bones 583 00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:21,600 Speaker 1: kind of stretch. 584 00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:25,800 Speaker 4: Like yeah, bone like yeah, like and shit widends literally you. 585 00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:26,400 Speaker 3: Can google this. 586 00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:30,160 Speaker 1: I'm not a scientist, as we've already talked about on 587 00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:34,600 Speaker 1: this podcast. But my feet changed from a size a 588 00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,360 Speaker 1: solid size eight and a half to a real size 589 00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:39,760 Speaker 1: nine nine and a half sometimes. 590 00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:41,320 Speaker 3: And that was I cried. 591 00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:46,880 Speaker 1: I had this pair of vintage of velvet Todd Oldham slippers. 592 00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:49,560 Speaker 1: They were so beautiful. I only wore them for special 593 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:52,880 Speaker 1: occasions because they hurt. 594 00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:54,280 Speaker 3: And they didn't fit anymore. 595 00:31:54,360 --> 00:31:57,760 Speaker 1: I mean, I I don't have any shoes from before 596 00:31:58,120 --> 00:32:01,880 Speaker 1: raz yeah, or two pairs my wedding shoes because I 597 00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:04,480 Speaker 1: bought them up size half sized bigger because I was like, 598 00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:08,000 Speaker 1: my feet are probably gonna swell that day. That was 599 00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:11,280 Speaker 1: hard because I love clothes. The other thing that was 600 00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,400 Speaker 1: hard was a lot of my dresses in the rib 601 00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,400 Speaker 1: cage don't didn't fit in the same way. And still 602 00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:19,000 Speaker 1: things don't fit me in the rib cage the same 603 00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:21,680 Speaker 1: way because my rib cage expanded about an inch and 604 00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:26,280 Speaker 1: that really it's a lot when you're a clothes. 605 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,360 Speaker 3: Horse like I am. I say, in a sweatshirt yeah. 606 00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:33,080 Speaker 4: But like no, no, but that's so real. Yeah, my feet. 607 00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:36,960 Speaker 4: My feet grew also, not weirdly. They grew when I 608 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:40,400 Speaker 4: was pregnant with Endzo, but they went back like they 609 00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:42,080 Speaker 4: grew to eight and a half and they went back 610 00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:45,120 Speaker 4: to eight about eight or nine months after I had him, 611 00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:47,880 Speaker 4: Like they went back, I know, they went back, but 612 00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:51,360 Speaker 4: then I know, and then they didn't grow while I 613 00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:54,400 Speaker 4: was pregnant with Axel. But then it was the pandemic 614 00:32:54,880 --> 00:32:57,320 Speaker 4: and my ask wasn't wearing shoes. I was barefoot every 615 00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:00,200 Speaker 4: day and I still had all that relaxed and in 616 00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:03,360 Speaker 4: my body after I had him, and my feet grew 617 00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:04,920 Speaker 4: to eight and a half and they have stayed at 618 00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:05,440 Speaker 4: eight and a half. 619 00:33:05,520 --> 00:33:06,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 620 00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:09,080 Speaker 1: The pandemic did that to a lot of people. Actually, 621 00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:11,200 Speaker 1: a lot of people were sneezing their feet into little 622 00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:12,240 Speaker 1: shoes and. 623 00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:16,480 Speaker 4: Well, just like walking barefoot all day every day will 624 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:19,000 Speaker 4: make your foot spread out a little bit. 625 00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,240 Speaker 3: It will in a good way, in a good way, 626 00:33:21,240 --> 00:33:21,800 Speaker 3: in a good way. 627 00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:24,480 Speaker 4: But I did have to get rid of so many shoes. 628 00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:28,960 Speaker 3: It's brutal. My mom, I don't know about my mom. I 629 00:33:28,960 --> 00:33:30,160 Speaker 3: hope my mom doesn't listen to this. 630 00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:35,160 Speaker 1: My mom has these little she has feet like me. 631 00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:39,760 Speaker 1: They're like little like they look like little like a 632 00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:43,320 Speaker 1: toddler's foot, like very wide, right, uh huh, a wide 633 00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:45,800 Speaker 1: foot like I can spread my foot pretty wide, which 634 00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:49,600 Speaker 1: I guess is pretty healthy. But my mom will squeeze 635 00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:52,320 Speaker 1: her foot and has been squeezing her foot. She's like 636 00:33:52,360 --> 00:33:54,920 Speaker 1: in her seventies, has been squeezing her feet into shoes 637 00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:58,479 Speaker 1: that are half size a full size too small for 638 00:33:58,520 --> 00:34:02,960 Speaker 1: as long as I can remember. And this bitch's big 639 00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:07,560 Speaker 1: toenail is like non nonexistent now, Like. 640 00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:12,040 Speaker 4: The other day else was she supposed to squeeze her 641 00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:13,080 Speaker 4: foot into those heels. 642 00:34:13,120 --> 00:34:16,239 Speaker 1: Stephanie the the. 643 00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:18,400 Speaker 4: Big dynail got out of the way on the way 644 00:34:18,600 --> 00:34:19,760 Speaker 4: we were at the pool. 645 00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:21,400 Speaker 3: I was like, Mom, what's going on with your toenail? 646 00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:22,360 Speaker 3: She was like, oh, it's fake. 647 00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:25,280 Speaker 1: I was like, what, this woman has put an acrylic 648 00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:28,160 Speaker 1: She's had them put in a like a big acrylic 649 00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:32,640 Speaker 1: thumbnail on her toe. I'm like mom, no, Mom no, 650 00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:36,200 Speaker 1: And like listen, my mom's always trying to get keta deal. 651 00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:40,400 Speaker 1: She's like shopping, you know, like in the sale department, 652 00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:42,879 Speaker 1: shopping for things that like she you know, she loves 653 00:34:42,920 --> 00:34:44,800 Speaker 1: these shoes, so she's gonna just jam her a little 654 00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:48,640 Speaker 1: her little titsieson there. But like, wow, don't What I'm 655 00:34:48,640 --> 00:34:51,480 Speaker 1: saying to you, dear listeners is don't fucking do this 656 00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:54,680 Speaker 1: shit to yourselves, buy your shoes the right size, babe. 657 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:55,759 Speaker 3: It's not worth it. 658 00:34:55,960 --> 00:35:01,080 Speaker 1: Maybe seventy asking your asking your fuck and pediatrist to 659 00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:03,239 Speaker 1: glue a fake toenail on your toe. 660 00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:08,720 Speaker 3: It's Melissa, Oh my god, I will. 661 00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:10,640 Speaker 1: I refuse to take a picture of it, but I 662 00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:15,360 Speaker 1: kind of almost want to. 663 00:35:13,520 --> 00:35:17,960 Speaker 3: You because it is wild. I was like, mom, what's 664 00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:20,400 Speaker 3: going on with your big toe? Wow? 665 00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:23,560 Speaker 4: I mean listen, part of me respects the hustle, like 666 00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:28,280 Speaker 4: part know the dedication. These are these are your feet. 667 00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:30,439 Speaker 3: You have to you have to. These are your feet. 668 00:35:30,480 --> 00:35:32,839 Speaker 4: This is your only this is your foot. You're right, 669 00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:36,200 Speaker 4: you only get you only get two feet, girl. 670 00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:38,360 Speaker 3: You know you can't buy another pair. 671 00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:40,839 Speaker 4: Like, yeah, no, you can't put another pair of feet on. 672 00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:43,520 Speaker 1: I have her in Brad is the one. He's like, 673 00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:47,439 Speaker 1: we gotta get your mom's hookahs. Like she's like, she's 674 00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:49,480 Speaker 1: in hopahs now she's like it. 675 00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:50,799 Speaker 3: I mean, here's the thing. 676 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:55,640 Speaker 1: Is like, when you're thinking about your body, it's also 677 00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:59,120 Speaker 1: about like long term right, Like so okay, so this. 678 00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:00,200 Speaker 3: Is the other thing that me. 679 00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:05,239 Speaker 1: Yeah, I got cellulate in places that I'd never had 680 00:36:05,239 --> 00:36:08,000 Speaker 1: it before. And I have cellu light on my abs 681 00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:10,200 Speaker 1: and it fucking sucks because it's. 682 00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:12,320 Speaker 3: Really annoying and. 683 00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:16,960 Speaker 1: It just doesn't look like it used to look. It 684 00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:22,120 Speaker 1: doesn't look like it used to look. And then I 685 00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:30,240 Speaker 1: took a workout class ri recently and the instructor so ripped, 686 00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:34,480 Speaker 1: so strong and like she also had had a baby, 687 00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:38,720 Speaker 1: and I was looking at her sitting on the bike, 688 00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:40,759 Speaker 1: and I was like, oh my god, that's how my 689 00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:42,759 Speaker 1: I mean like not all the muscle, but like that's 690 00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:43,760 Speaker 1: how my skin looks. 691 00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:45,480 Speaker 3: That's how my skin looks, and it's like her. 692 00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:50,360 Speaker 1: And it gave me this feeling of like, oh my god, Okay, 693 00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:54,040 Speaker 1: that's that woman is a fucking badass. Like she's super strong, 694 00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:56,160 Speaker 1: she's ripped. I would love to be as ripped as 695 00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:58,480 Speaker 1: she is, but i'd have to teach like five class 696 00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:00,359 Speaker 1: a day or whatever the hell else she's doing. Write 697 00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:03,120 Speaker 1: that part right, But it did make me feel much 698 00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:06,279 Speaker 1: more like, Okay, I'm doing all right, Like I don't 699 00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:09,160 Speaker 1: need to be so like when is this gonna go away? 700 00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:11,319 Speaker 1: It might never go away, like I don't know, like 701 00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:14,920 Speaker 1: it might stick around forever. Maybe there's a treatment I 702 00:37:14,920 --> 00:37:17,680 Speaker 1: could get. I'm not sure, you know what I do, 703 00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:21,400 Speaker 1: Like the gun, the massage gun, for my body. 704 00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:25,280 Speaker 4: Can love love the massage gun Love a massage gun. 705 00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:27,720 Speaker 1: Guys, if you if you haven't ever tried one, please 706 00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:31,600 Speaker 1: do because get is really one of the best things 707 00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:34,520 Speaker 1: you could spend money on. A great Christmas present honestly, 708 00:37:34,560 --> 00:37:36,520 Speaker 1: like a great Christmas present for like, if you have 709 00:37:36,560 --> 00:37:38,439 Speaker 1: a partner that like works out a lot, you could 710 00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:40,840 Speaker 1: buy them matt Christmas present and just use it yourself. 711 00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:45,279 Speaker 4: Or I'm now like thinking, I'm like, did we send 712 00:37:45,320 --> 00:37:47,360 Speaker 4: my parents one? Because we meant to send my parents 713 00:37:47,360 --> 00:37:50,399 Speaker 4: one because my mom just got knee surgery a few 714 00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:52,560 Speaker 4: months ago and she's doing great, but she's got these 715 00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:55,160 Speaker 4: spots that are just like tight with like bar tissue 716 00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:59,480 Speaker 4: or whatever. Just it's surgery, you know, and you touched 717 00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:02,480 Speaker 4: on something I think, uh that I wanted to add. 718 00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:05,800 Speaker 4: I think is the phase I'm sort of have moved 719 00:38:05,800 --> 00:38:08,440 Speaker 4: into or am moving into when it comes to like 720 00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:13,400 Speaker 4: how I feel about my body is longevity. Ugh, totally yes, 721 00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:17,120 Speaker 4: Like i feel like I've reframed it where I'm like, 722 00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:21,040 Speaker 4: I want to be agile, like in my fucking eighties, 723 00:38:21,160 --> 00:38:22,080 Speaker 4: Like I want to be. 724 00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,400 Speaker 3: I want to live forever. I'm want to learn how 725 00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:24,800 Speaker 3: to fly. 726 00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:27,400 Speaker 4: I want to live forever. I don't want to like 727 00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:31,360 Speaker 4: live with you know, pain every day. Of course, like 728 00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:34,560 Speaker 4: anything could happen, chronic things have I have old injuries 729 00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:37,000 Speaker 4: that I do like if it's humid enough, my knee 730 00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:41,879 Speaker 4: will fucking ache, if it's whatever, you know, And that's 731 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:43,520 Speaker 4: just like I've just had to like get to a 732 00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:46,120 Speaker 4: place where like I accept that and like, you know, 733 00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:49,279 Speaker 4: also like whatever, I broke my knee skiing, like I 734 00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:51,520 Speaker 4: was doing something kind of badass and like it probably 735 00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:53,960 Speaker 4: broke from like years of dance and that was also badass, 736 00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:58,439 Speaker 4: So like go me. It's like that's a little pep talk. 737 00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:02,239 Speaker 4: I give myself what I'm feeling frustrated about the like 738 00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:06,200 Speaker 4: a dull ache in my knee because I like tore 739 00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:12,440 Speaker 4: all these ligments once. But yeah, it's more like centered 740 00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:17,120 Speaker 4: now on I work out because I have learned that 741 00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:19,520 Speaker 4: I do feel the best and most confident if I 742 00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:23,120 Speaker 4: feel strong regardless of my body size and what my 743 00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:31,600 Speaker 4: body actually looks like. And also I remember, like when 744 00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:34,080 Speaker 4: I oh, I remember when I was pregnant with Enzo, 745 00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:38,160 Speaker 4: being so grateful for having so many years of dance 746 00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:42,400 Speaker 4: build up so much muscle and like muscle memory in 747 00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:45,719 Speaker 4: my body that I really think it was, like why 748 00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:50,759 Speaker 4: my labor was, like there's certain things that I because 749 00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:53,239 Speaker 4: I also had a lot of pain during my pregnancy, 750 00:39:55,360 --> 00:40:00,239 Speaker 4: back pain and like whatever, yeah I remember, but I 751 00:40:00,280 --> 00:40:03,000 Speaker 4: remember thinking like oh my God, like thank God, like 752 00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:05,880 Speaker 4: my legs are so strong, or like my this is 753 00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:08,440 Speaker 4: so strong because I did this for so many years 754 00:40:08,480 --> 00:40:11,680 Speaker 4: and I'm like, kind of it's helping me so much, 755 00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:17,480 Speaker 4: like yeah, through this, you know. I kind of hate 756 00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:22,520 Speaker 4: when people are like hot take coming in incoming, hot takee. 757 00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:23,480 Speaker 3: I love a hot take. 758 00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,759 Speaker 4: I hate when people are like, I'm just like so 759 00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:30,799 Speaker 4: grateful for my post birden body because it grew my 760 00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:37,080 Speaker 4: child and like yes, yes, of course, no, no, I know. 761 00:40:37,840 --> 00:40:41,399 Speaker 6: Can we just be fucking annoyed at how much what 762 00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:45,360 Speaker 6: it did I know, and all the fucking damage it 763 00:40:45,400 --> 00:40:48,240 Speaker 6: did and just be like this a lot, This a lot, 764 00:40:48,800 --> 00:40:49,640 Speaker 6: It's a lot. 765 00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:54,600 Speaker 4: Okay. Everything is different. Our ribs are wider, our vaginas 766 00:40:54,640 --> 00:40:58,160 Speaker 4: look different, our everything looks different. Okay, it's all me 767 00:40:58,360 --> 00:41:01,520 Speaker 4: Like it's a lot, and it's okay, and I'm gonna 768 00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:05,200 Speaker 4: accept it. But I don't need to like sit and 769 00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:10,080 Speaker 4: seep in gratitude. I love my children. I'm so grateful 770 00:41:10,239 --> 00:41:13,240 Speaker 4: that I could grow them, and yes, all that is true, 771 00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:18,640 Speaker 4: and also fuck yeah, the buck just happened. 772 00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:19,799 Speaker 3: The buck. 773 00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:22,520 Speaker 1: That's the real fuckery. For those of you that are 774 00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:26,120 Speaker 1: listening to this of having had kids or like can't, 775 00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:29,719 Speaker 1: don't want to whatever, you still were a kid and 776 00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:34,520 Speaker 1: somebody made you and it was hard motherfucking work, and 777 00:41:34,719 --> 00:41:38,880 Speaker 1: a nobody nobody's supporting that shit. Not in the United States. 778 00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:43,640 Speaker 1: There's no healthcare, there's no maternity leave, there's no help 779 00:41:43,680 --> 00:41:46,440 Speaker 1: when your kids are little, Like you have to fucking 780 00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:48,520 Speaker 1: do all that shit on your own, and like. 781 00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:51,799 Speaker 4: It sucks, and like I love my children so much 782 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:53,600 Speaker 4: and I and I look at them and I stare 783 00:41:53,640 --> 00:41:55,680 Speaker 4: at them in like total wonderment and I'm like, oh 784 00:41:55,719 --> 00:41:57,520 Speaker 4: my god. But at the same time, I can't stare 785 00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:59,720 Speaker 4: at my child, and that's a given. That's a given. 786 00:42:00,239 --> 00:42:01,759 Speaker 4: I also at the same time can't stare at my 787 00:42:01,840 --> 00:42:04,719 Speaker 4: child and be like, yes, I feel okay about everything 788 00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:07,279 Speaker 4: that growing you did to my body, Like I gotta 789 00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:09,560 Speaker 4: find that shit somewhere else. That's that ship I have 790 00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:12,680 Speaker 4: to like make I've had to make peace with in 791 00:42:12,760 --> 00:42:17,920 Speaker 4: like a different part of my brain. Like for me personally, individuals, 792 00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:21,359 Speaker 4: you know individually. I have, yes, like I have had 793 00:42:21,400 --> 00:42:23,280 Speaker 4: to come at that from a different angle. 794 00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:27,439 Speaker 1: It's not a it's it's not a one all, one 795 00:42:27,480 --> 00:42:29,920 Speaker 1: size fits all thing to be like, uh you know what, 796 00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:32,040 Speaker 1: I'm just so grateful that my body could do it. 797 00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:34,319 Speaker 1: It's not it's not some So for some people that 798 00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:37,279 Speaker 1: is exactly right and it fits them and great. 799 00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:40,319 Speaker 3: Well for some people it's like uh no, no, me, 800 00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:42,719 Speaker 3: no mea memium. 801 00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:48,920 Speaker 4: I had to go on a journey with this new body, 802 00:42:49,280 --> 00:42:51,120 Speaker 4: like I said, and then that, yeah, brings you back 803 00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:52,960 Speaker 4: to like I think the shift for me was just 804 00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:57,400 Speaker 4: like looking towards the future, like accepting, learning how to 805 00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:01,399 Speaker 4: dress differently, learning how to eat differently, like for this 806 00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:02,080 Speaker 4: new body. 807 00:43:02,600 --> 00:43:11,480 Speaker 3: Yeah. 808 00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:15,600 Speaker 4: More actually to get into like some nerd time. Oh yeah, 809 00:43:15,600 --> 00:43:18,279 Speaker 4: she's done this great article that was about body neutrality, 810 00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:21,719 Speaker 4: and it kind of hit for me. I just want 811 00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:25,239 Speaker 4: to read a little bit her opening line on what 812 00:43:25,360 --> 00:43:28,360 Speaker 4: she's describing what body neutrality is. She talks about like 813 00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:31,359 Speaker 4: how we had this big shift towards body positivity and 814 00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:34,040 Speaker 4: like accepting all bodies and like how great that was 815 00:43:34,120 --> 00:43:37,759 Speaker 4: culturally and like as a society, and maybe it went 816 00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:40,360 Speaker 4: like a little bit like, you know, into like toxic 817 00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:41,719 Speaker 4: positivity land like. 818 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:47,240 Speaker 1: A little bit maybe I don't know, I mean it all, 819 00:43:47,320 --> 00:43:49,920 Speaker 1: it all, it all swings, you know, it all swings. 820 00:43:49,920 --> 00:43:53,000 Speaker 4: So body neutrality, on the other hand, takes the pressure 821 00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,600 Speaker 4: way off and tends to feel like a much more 822 00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:59,480 Speaker 4: approachable and achievable goal. It offers a safe place to 823 00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:02,600 Speaker 4: rest as you exit body hatred without putting pressure on 824 00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:05,640 Speaker 4: you to somehow magically love every iota of your body 825 00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:09,680 Speaker 4: and self. Body neutrality invites us to understand ourselves and 826 00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:13,000 Speaker 4: others as whole human beings first, and to form our 827 00:44:13,080 --> 00:44:17,040 Speaker 4: concept of worth, value, and identity around a person's internal 828 00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:19,800 Speaker 4: self instead of their external self. 829 00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:22,680 Speaker 3: Beautiful, beautiful, And. 830 00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:25,400 Speaker 4: For example, I wish I was smaller and that's not 831 00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:28,359 Speaker 4: a problem. I hate the way my blank looks and 832 00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:31,400 Speaker 4: that makes sense and is okay. I desperately want to 833 00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:34,000 Speaker 4: lose weight and that doesn't mean anything bad about me. 834 00:44:34,600 --> 00:44:37,400 Speaker 4: Like having these two things coexists, and I feel like 835 00:44:37,440 --> 00:44:41,040 Speaker 4: that's where I am in my life too, thankfully, where 836 00:44:41,040 --> 00:44:45,280 Speaker 4: I've gotten to like accept this like post two children, older, 837 00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:50,600 Speaker 4: post injuries, whatever, whole life right, It's also like the 838 00:44:50,680 --> 00:44:54,799 Speaker 4: journey of my whole life. I don't have to like 839 00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:58,560 Speaker 4: love every little bit, but I can still accept it 840 00:44:58,600 --> 00:45:01,840 Speaker 4: at the same time, and I can still have goals 841 00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:04,600 Speaker 4: and I can still strive for things I can strive to. 842 00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:07,120 Speaker 4: You know, I want to have a strong body when 843 00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:10,680 Speaker 4: I'm in my old, old old years. You know, I 844 00:45:10,719 --> 00:45:13,480 Speaker 4: want to still be able to like walk through Europe 845 00:45:13,600 --> 00:45:16,680 Speaker 4: or New York and not like and be okay like 846 00:45:17,160 --> 00:45:20,600 Speaker 4: and pick up my grandkids and like, you know, it's 847 00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:23,440 Speaker 4: it's becoming about and even now, like I have two 848 00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:25,839 Speaker 4: very active little boys, I just don't want to get 849 00:45:25,840 --> 00:45:28,200 Speaker 4: winded when I'm playing with them or running with them, 850 00:45:28,320 --> 00:45:33,719 Speaker 4: like that simple little thing that shift for me when 851 00:45:33,719 --> 00:45:35,600 Speaker 4: I'm playing with them and I feel strong and I'm 852 00:45:35,640 --> 00:45:39,560 Speaker 4: not like a few years ago, I would get winded, 853 00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:44,440 Speaker 4: like severely winded after a few seconds of like kicking 854 00:45:44,440 --> 00:45:45,840 Speaker 4: a soccer ball or something. 855 00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:49,520 Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, I don't, I am winded and I 856 00:45:49,560 --> 00:45:53,960 Speaker 3: don't now and thank you. 857 00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:56,600 Speaker 4: It was like a lot of hard work to not 858 00:45:56,840 --> 00:45:59,400 Speaker 4: to get to this place, so like I can less 859 00:45:59,440 --> 00:46:01,879 Speaker 4: like maybe two minutes of kidscraper ball. 860 00:46:02,280 --> 00:46:02,919 Speaker 3: No, that's great. 861 00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:05,680 Speaker 4: I think that's a big, big thing. It's reframing it. 862 00:46:05,760 --> 00:46:09,000 Speaker 4: And yeah, and I think it's you know, again getting 863 00:46:09,040 --> 00:46:12,840 Speaker 4: older and getting better, like giving less bucks and accepting 864 00:46:12,880 --> 00:46:15,399 Speaker 4: things and accepting that like I don't know, Yeah, there 865 00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:16,880 Speaker 4: can be parts of my body that I want to 866 00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:20,480 Speaker 4: change or improve or that I wish were different, But 867 00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:23,600 Speaker 4: I can be like okay and feel really good about 868 00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:24,840 Speaker 4: myself at the same time. 869 00:46:25,440 --> 00:46:28,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, I think those two things can and should exist together. 870 00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:33,640 Speaker 1: It's the obsession with yes, the obsession when you cross 871 00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:36,799 Speaker 1: into obsessive territory when you're like I'm constantly thinking about 872 00:46:36,880 --> 00:46:39,160 Speaker 1: what I'm gonna eat, yeah I did eat, or when 873 00:46:39,160 --> 00:46:41,400 Speaker 1: I'm going to work out, or how much calories is 874 00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:43,960 Speaker 1: in this and that. Like remember, for a long time 875 00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:46,320 Speaker 1: everyone was like, oh, just track your macros or whatever, 876 00:46:46,400 --> 00:46:48,680 Speaker 1: and I was like, no, some people can do that shit, 877 00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:52,120 Speaker 1: and it's cool for them, not for me. The minute 878 00:46:52,160 --> 00:46:54,160 Speaker 1: I start writing down, like what I ate. 879 00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:57,720 Speaker 4: C cock cuckoo, Like, yeah. 880 00:46:57,120 --> 00:47:00,000 Speaker 1: It gets crazy. I get crazy about it. It doesn't, 881 00:47:00,719 --> 00:47:02,799 Speaker 1: you know. It's like and then that's the thing is 882 00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:05,240 Speaker 1: like experimenting to try to find Yeah. 883 00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:07,560 Speaker 4: I've gone through phases where I can track, and I've 884 00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:11,120 Speaker 4: gone through phases where I track, and the same I 885 00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,080 Speaker 4: have the same reaction. I go Nope, We're going to 886 00:47:13,080 --> 00:47:15,480 Speaker 4: abandon this immediately. This is not good for us, and 887 00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:16,680 Speaker 4: we're going to find a different way. 888 00:47:16,840 --> 00:47:18,360 Speaker 3: We're going to find a different way. It's going to 889 00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:18,960 Speaker 3: be a different way. 890 00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:22,440 Speaker 1: I like the the other thing that was in the 891 00:47:22,480 --> 00:47:25,200 Speaker 1: Nerd Time this week is it was like slightly touched on, 892 00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:29,840 Speaker 1: which is functionality based body image, which is like what 893 00:47:30,400 --> 00:47:34,160 Speaker 1: you're talking about function how your body can function for you, right, 894 00:47:34,320 --> 00:47:38,160 Speaker 1: Like that longevity thing is something I think not everybody 895 00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:40,640 Speaker 1: is thinking about necessarily in their twenties or thirties, but 896 00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:43,359 Speaker 1: as you start to hit your forties, you start going like, right, 897 00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:47,520 Speaker 1: like I can make this. 898 00:47:48,360 --> 00:47:51,399 Speaker 3: I have some power here. 899 00:47:51,520 --> 00:47:53,520 Speaker 1: And one of the things I'm doing lately on this 900 00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:58,279 Speaker 1: on the peloton bike is like I'm trying to do 901 00:47:58,440 --> 00:48:03,520 Speaker 1: longer rides for lone there extent of time, which is 902 00:48:03,600 --> 00:48:08,840 Speaker 1: like endured. Yeah, it's like endurance and VO two. 903 00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:11,160 Speaker 3: Max and all this stuff that I don't really understand. 904 00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:15,000 Speaker 1: But the trainer, Matt Whipper's my peloton boyfriend, Oh, he 905 00:48:15,080 --> 00:48:18,239 Speaker 1: talks about all the time. He's like, this is how 906 00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:20,880 Speaker 1: you get like stronger over time. This is how like 907 00:48:20,960 --> 00:48:24,400 Speaker 1: you increase longevity VO two max like dips as you 908 00:48:24,440 --> 00:48:28,680 Speaker 1: get older, you're helping to increase it. I'm like, part 909 00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:31,680 Speaker 1: of doing the workouts is me trying to train my 910 00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:34,960 Speaker 1: heart and lungs and body to be like, you can 911 00:48:35,040 --> 00:48:37,080 Speaker 1: do this, you can go up a hill, you can 912 00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:40,960 Speaker 1: like you know, I mean, yes, there might be a 913 00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:43,120 Speaker 1: time in the future where I do have to have 914 00:48:43,200 --> 00:48:46,680 Speaker 1: help walking and stuff like that, but as long as 915 00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:48,759 Speaker 1: I can, I want to stay in a body that 916 00:48:48,840 --> 00:48:53,080 Speaker 1: lets me like squat down and talk to ras, tie shoes, 917 00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:55,359 Speaker 1: bend over and pick things up without having to lean 918 00:48:55,520 --> 00:48:59,040 Speaker 1: on stuff. You know, yeah, get up from the floor 919 00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:02,840 Speaker 1: and get back down. It's like stuff that's like super 920 00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:05,440 Speaker 1: simple when you're in your twenties and can get harder 921 00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:08,200 Speaker 1: and harder if you're not taking care of the vessel 922 00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:10,919 Speaker 1: that you're in. And it's like when I think about 923 00:49:10,960 --> 00:49:14,000 Speaker 1: my body and like think about, Okay, I can do that, 924 00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:14,400 Speaker 1: you know. 925 00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:15,759 Speaker 3: Do I still have a. 926 00:49:15,719 --> 00:49:17,839 Speaker 1: Freak out sometimes where I'm like in a picture where 927 00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:23,160 Speaker 1: I don't look like I think I do in my head, yes, oh, 928 00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:24,240 Speaker 1: perc where I'm. 929 00:49:24,120 --> 00:49:29,280 Speaker 4: Like oh oh no, oh oh no no a brain 930 00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:32,040 Speaker 4: picture doesn't doesn't make picture. 931 00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:38,120 Speaker 1: But functionality based body image is it can be really yeah, 932 00:49:38,560 --> 00:49:41,319 Speaker 1: healthy because then you're thinking about like what can my 933 00:49:41,360 --> 00:49:45,920 Speaker 1: body do as opposed to just how does my body look? 934 00:49:46,080 --> 00:49:49,800 Speaker 1: And that can be hard to especially like if you're 935 00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:53,080 Speaker 1: coming up against maybe like an illness or chronic pain, 936 00:49:53,400 --> 00:49:57,480 Speaker 1: or something new that you're struggling with, like something like endometriosis, 937 00:49:57,560 --> 00:49:59,359 Speaker 1: which is like, oh shit, my body doesn't do what 938 00:49:59,440 --> 00:50:02,800 Speaker 1: I doesn't function the way that I wanted to function. 939 00:50:03,000 --> 00:50:05,480 Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, oh my god, why am I choking? My 940 00:50:05,520 --> 00:50:07,879 Speaker 3: body is not functioning? Guys. 941 00:50:08,239 --> 00:50:11,759 Speaker 1: Ah, that's my body telling me I need to drink 942 00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:12,560 Speaker 1: some fun and water. 943 00:50:12,680 --> 00:50:15,840 Speaker 4: Drink some water. But yeah, it's it's also like I 944 00:50:16,080 --> 00:50:19,439 Speaker 4: definitely I mean this not to minimize anything, because yeah, 945 00:50:19,680 --> 00:50:22,440 Speaker 4: as you were just mentioning, like, there are things that 946 00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:24,440 Speaker 4: are out of your control that make your body like 947 00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:28,200 Speaker 4: really feel out of your control and away from you. 948 00:50:31,440 --> 00:50:34,200 Speaker 4: But in some of my low moments, I've definitely just 949 00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:36,680 Speaker 4: had that feeling of just throwing my hands up and 950 00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:38,239 Speaker 4: going like this is the body I got? 951 00:50:38,800 --> 00:50:42,000 Speaker 3: Is it? I know this one? This is the one, babe. 952 00:50:42,640 --> 00:50:44,919 Speaker 4: So we're just gonna ride this wave. We're gonna ride 953 00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:48,120 Speaker 4: this bad day, and then when we feel a little better, 954 00:50:48,239 --> 00:50:50,480 Speaker 4: we're just gonna get back to like, Okay, well, how 955 00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:54,840 Speaker 4: do I just keep this body and it's or close 956 00:50:54,920 --> 00:50:58,319 Speaker 4: to its best potential, right yeah? Or like yeah, take 957 00:50:58,360 --> 00:51:02,400 Speaker 4: care of it or you know, embrace it, embrace it 958 00:51:02,840 --> 00:51:06,520 Speaker 4: and I at least just try. Like yes, it's so 959 00:51:06,719 --> 00:51:09,600 Speaker 4: much about just like getting back up and just trying. 960 00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:12,840 Speaker 1: I will say, she did mention something about fashion, and 961 00:51:12,840 --> 00:51:14,520 Speaker 1: I want to touch on that really quickly. I do 962 00:51:14,600 --> 00:51:19,440 Speaker 1: think fashion clothes are a way too, really can be 963 00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:22,319 Speaker 1: a way if you enjoy fashion, to be a way 964 00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:26,440 Speaker 1: to like accept where you're at in your body at any. 965 00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:28,040 Speaker 3: Right. 966 00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:31,440 Speaker 1: It can be really tricky too, because, like I was saying, 967 00:51:32,800 --> 00:51:34,320 Speaker 1: if you don't fit in stuff that you used to 968 00:51:34,400 --> 00:51:38,240 Speaker 1: love or whatever, that can be jarring. But the quick 969 00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:41,040 Speaker 1: advice that I would say about accepting a new body, 970 00:51:41,080 --> 00:51:45,160 Speaker 1: whatever size it is, is like, try to get yourself 971 00:51:45,160 --> 00:51:46,920 Speaker 1: a couple of pieces, but like, and they don't have 972 00:51:46,920 --> 00:51:48,480 Speaker 1: to be expensive, but like, try to get yourself a 973 00:51:48,520 --> 00:51:51,319 Speaker 1: couple pieces that you feel good and then fit. You know, 974 00:51:51,719 --> 00:51:56,400 Speaker 1: because wasting your time wanting to fit into a size 975 00:51:56,440 --> 00:52:01,760 Speaker 1: that you used to be it's such a fucking waste 976 00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:05,040 Speaker 1: of time. It's such a waste time. You can save 977 00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:07,200 Speaker 1: a couple of pairs of jeans, like maybe if you 978 00:52:07,239 --> 00:52:10,000 Speaker 1: want to, like, maybe you'll get in there again. Maybe 979 00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:13,640 Speaker 1: you won't, but like having them be like I'm gonna 980 00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:16,680 Speaker 1: fit in this again someday. It's just like a to me, 981 00:52:17,160 --> 00:52:18,120 Speaker 1: it's a waste of time. 982 00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:19,279 Speaker 3: It's a waste of time. 983 00:52:19,640 --> 00:52:22,480 Speaker 1: I'd rather go, you know, And again I'm not saying 984 00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:25,080 Speaker 1: it has to be expensive. I'd rather go like thrifting 985 00:52:25,760 --> 00:52:29,839 Speaker 1: and find a couple of like pairs of jeans that 986 00:52:29,960 --> 00:52:32,400 Speaker 1: I think are interesting and cool. Like usually I go 987 00:52:32,440 --> 00:52:35,400 Speaker 1: in the men's section. I have a ton of old Levi's, 988 00:52:35,480 --> 00:52:38,640 Speaker 1: tons of Oh Hot Tip love an old LEVI love 989 00:52:38,640 --> 00:52:41,960 Speaker 1: a men's baggy jean. It's like cinch the waist. I 990 00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:45,000 Speaker 1: love a you know, like a love a men's blazer. 991 00:52:45,880 --> 00:52:50,759 Speaker 1: I don't know what Joetta's fashion is, but like even like, 992 00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:53,080 Speaker 1: I mean, I have a couple of friends whose bodies 993 00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:55,160 Speaker 1: have changed sizes in the last couple of years too, 994 00:52:55,200 --> 00:52:57,400 Speaker 1: and I remember shopping with one of them and being like, 995 00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,840 Speaker 1: just get yourself like two pairs of jeans and a 996 00:53:00,880 --> 00:53:02,680 Speaker 1: couple of new shirts to mix in with, like some 997 00:53:02,719 --> 00:53:05,640 Speaker 1: sweaters that you know still fit you. And it changed 998 00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:07,400 Speaker 1: the game for her because she was like, oh, I 999 00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,360 Speaker 1: feel cute. I don't feel like I'm looking at a 1000 00:53:09,400 --> 00:53:10,920 Speaker 1: closet full of clothes where I'm like I don't fit 1001 00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:13,880 Speaker 1: in anything. I feel like I have a capsule wardrobe, 1002 00:53:14,000 --> 00:53:17,120 Speaker 1: you know, like I have like seven things that I'm 1003 00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:19,520 Speaker 1: mixing and matching and that all look really cute on me, 1004 00:53:19,760 --> 00:53:23,200 Speaker 1: and I feel good about myself, and like that feeling 1005 00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:25,000 Speaker 1: good about yourself when you walk out the door. 1006 00:53:26,160 --> 00:53:28,600 Speaker 3: It's a big thing. It's a big, big, big thing. 1007 00:53:29,400 --> 00:53:31,520 Speaker 1: Like yeah, and that can be it, doesn't you know, 1008 00:53:31,600 --> 00:53:33,719 Speaker 1: you don't have to like fit in somebody else's idea 1009 00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:35,840 Speaker 1: of a capsule wardrobe. I mean thinking about what I 1010 00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:39,439 Speaker 1: took to New York and I was like, a plaid shirt, 1011 00:53:40,520 --> 00:53:43,880 Speaker 1: this blue jacket that I bought, that's like it's in tatters. 1012 00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:47,719 Speaker 1: I mean, this thing is just like tattered, vintage like 1013 00:53:48,480 --> 00:53:49,800 Speaker 1: patches on both elbows. 1014 00:53:49,840 --> 00:53:51,080 Speaker 3: It is dastardly. 1015 00:53:51,880 --> 00:53:57,799 Speaker 1: A pair of brown khaki shorts, one pair of loafers 1016 00:53:57,840 --> 00:54:02,719 Speaker 1: that I loafed all around New York in, and a 1017 00:54:02,760 --> 00:54:06,160 Speaker 1: pair of petal pushers, a little little cropped pant and 1018 00:54:06,280 --> 00:54:08,759 Speaker 1: three white tank tops that I just like rotated in 1019 00:54:08,800 --> 00:54:09,160 Speaker 1: and out. 1020 00:54:09,320 --> 00:54:11,560 Speaker 4: I feel like we should do an episode unpacking because 1021 00:54:11,560 --> 00:54:12,279 Speaker 4: you're really good at it. 1022 00:54:12,320 --> 00:54:15,520 Speaker 3: Oh my god, I love I love distilling down a wardrobe. 1023 00:54:15,640 --> 00:54:17,240 Speaker 3: I love it. It's so fun. 1024 00:54:18,040 --> 00:54:20,400 Speaker 1: And yet my closet is so stuffed that I have 1025 00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:22,080 Speaker 1: to like get in there and get rid of stuff. 1026 00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:25,400 Speaker 1: I'm not allowed to buy any more hangers. 1027 00:54:26,719 --> 00:54:27,520 Speaker 4: That's where we're at. 1028 00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:29,719 Speaker 1: Well, that's where that's where we've come to. 1029 00:54:30,680 --> 00:54:31,560 Speaker 3: That's where we've come to. 1030 00:54:33,120 --> 00:54:36,480 Speaker 1: Also, we've said this in other episodes, but like Find 1031 00:54:36,480 --> 00:54:38,880 Speaker 1: the Styling episode, I can't remember what number that one is, 1032 00:54:38,920 --> 00:54:43,080 Speaker 1: but like, size doesn't matter, it doesn't matter, matters, it 1033 00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:43,719 Speaker 1: doesn't matter. 1034 00:54:44,360 --> 00:54:45,640 Speaker 3: Oh booboo bits. 1035 00:54:46,160 --> 00:54:49,920 Speaker 4: I literally have felt so liberated since that episode and 1036 00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:52,120 Speaker 4: like just buying bigger, buying smaller, it. 1037 00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:54,960 Speaker 3: Just doesn't matter. Just whatever fits bro. 1038 00:54:55,360 --> 00:54:57,360 Speaker 4: Just being like, ooh, this this shirt would be like 1039 00:54:57,520 --> 00:55:00,319 Speaker 4: really cute over size, I'm gonna buy it in two 1040 00:55:00,320 --> 00:55:01,719 Speaker 4: sizes over or. 1041 00:55:02,040 --> 00:55:03,760 Speaker 3: It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter. 1042 00:55:03,640 --> 00:55:07,719 Speaker 1: Like it doesn't matter. We were I was shopping in 1043 00:55:07,800 --> 00:55:11,399 Speaker 1: New York. I was shopping and uh, they didn't have 1044 00:55:11,480 --> 00:55:13,879 Speaker 1: like a size whatever. I'm not gonna say the size 1045 00:55:13,880 --> 00:55:15,360 Speaker 1: so I don't trigger anybody, but they didn't have a 1046 00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:17,239 Speaker 1: size whatever in these shorts and I was like, oh, 1047 00:55:17,280 --> 00:55:18,760 Speaker 1: I'll just take the next size up, and the sales 1048 00:55:18,760 --> 00:55:21,319 Speaker 1: girl looked at me like I had grown another head, 1049 00:55:21,320 --> 00:55:22,600 Speaker 1: and she was like, I think those are going to 1050 00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:25,280 Speaker 1: be too big, and I was like, I'll be the judge. 1051 00:55:25,360 --> 00:55:26,960 Speaker 3: You know, like I got for you. 1052 00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:32,200 Speaker 4: Yeah judge, like yeah, yeah, I saw it. 1053 00:55:32,160 --> 00:55:33,920 Speaker 1: And like, maybe I want the shorts to fit kind 1054 00:55:33,920 --> 00:55:35,840 Speaker 1: of baggy, And personally I do like my shorts to 1055 00:55:35,840 --> 00:55:37,160 Speaker 1: fit kind of baggy, Like. 1056 00:55:38,040 --> 00:55:39,560 Speaker 4: I like a short short, but I don't like a 1057 00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:40,080 Speaker 4: tight waist. 1058 00:55:40,200 --> 00:55:42,439 Speaker 1: I've gotten so many pairs of pants in the last 1059 00:55:42,480 --> 00:55:45,280 Speaker 1: two years I've taken to the tailor it's like thirty 1060 00:55:45,280 --> 00:55:47,719 Speaker 1: bucks to get the elastic. 1061 00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:52,000 Speaker 3: On the waist changed so they're not tight. Fucking hate it. 1062 00:55:52,040 --> 00:55:53,839 Speaker 3: When pants were tight around the waist, I hate it. 1063 00:55:53,960 --> 00:55:57,279 Speaker 1: Yeah, unless it's a structured gene. I don't want a 1064 00:55:57,280 --> 00:56:00,440 Speaker 1: waistline that is. I mean, I've gone so like I 1065 00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:03,239 Speaker 1: have tons same pairs of pants that I've changed the 1066 00:56:03,239 --> 00:56:04,759 Speaker 1: elastic on the waist because I'm like. 1067 00:56:04,680 --> 00:56:06,480 Speaker 3: This is too tight. I don't want. I want like, 1068 00:56:07,239 --> 00:56:09,319 Speaker 3: I want us to feel like scrubs, you know. 1069 00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:18,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, hot tips more better. 1070 00:56:19,600 --> 00:56:23,560 Speaker 1: I mean, my takeaway is that I still is an 1071 00:56:23,560 --> 00:56:25,320 Speaker 1: evolving relationship with my body. 1072 00:56:25,440 --> 00:56:29,880 Speaker 3: Some days I'm. 1073 00:56:27,920 --> 00:56:30,960 Speaker 1: Really best friends with her, and other days like I 1074 00:56:31,040 --> 00:56:36,080 Speaker 1: just can't even And that's okay, I don't I mean 1075 00:56:36,160 --> 00:56:36,840 Speaker 1: at that, Well, that's what. 1076 00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:40,240 Speaker 4: I say, same, And I think my takeaway is that that's 1077 00:56:40,000 --> 00:56:42,759 Speaker 4: okay and that's normal, and that's probably true for like 1078 00:56:42,960 --> 00:56:44,080 Speaker 4: every living person. 1079 00:56:44,680 --> 00:56:47,720 Speaker 3: Mm hmmm hm. We hope. 1080 00:56:48,040 --> 00:56:50,759 Speaker 1: What we hope is that we all get to the 1081 00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:55,000 Speaker 1: place of, like, it's more better days than bad days. 1082 00:56:55,920 --> 00:56:59,120 Speaker 4: Yes, And I think if you're having if you're having 1083 00:56:59,200 --> 00:56:59,840 Speaker 4: more bad. 1084 00:56:59,719 --> 00:57:03,200 Speaker 1: Days, is then better days about your relationship with your 1085 00:57:03,200 --> 00:57:06,160 Speaker 1: body than like I encourage you to start talking to 1086 00:57:06,160 --> 00:57:08,400 Speaker 1: somebody about it, whether that's a therapist, whether that's a 1087 00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:11,040 Speaker 1: trusted friend, whether that's yeah, you. 1088 00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:14,320 Speaker 3: Know, like somebody not AI. 1089 00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:20,880 Speaker 1: No, But like, if you're having work more bad days 1090 00:57:20,920 --> 00:57:23,360 Speaker 1: than good days about your relationship with your body, then 1091 00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:25,680 Speaker 1: that's probably a signal to you to like make some 1092 00:57:25,760 --> 00:57:29,400 Speaker 1: kind of changes. But with that, certainly the signal to me, 1093 00:57:29,560 --> 00:57:31,760 Speaker 1: I was like this is this isn't sustainable. 1094 00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:34,520 Speaker 3: I'm gonna you know, I hate. 1095 00:57:34,440 --> 00:57:37,280 Speaker 1: Living this way where like I'm just thinking about food. 1096 00:57:37,360 --> 00:57:39,360 Speaker 3: My world was so small, it. 1097 00:57:39,320 --> 00:57:41,160 Speaker 1: Was such a small world when you're just thinking about 1098 00:57:41,160 --> 00:57:44,560 Speaker 1: your body and food and like a big world out there. Man, 1099 00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:47,160 Speaker 1: there's so much to do and see and like experience. 1100 00:57:47,360 --> 00:57:53,200 Speaker 1: Like yeah, life is a banquet. Most porcels are starving 1101 00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:53,720 Speaker 1: to death. 1102 00:57:54,080 --> 00:58:02,320 Speaker 3: That's from Anti Mary. And with that and with that. 1103 00:58:03,040 --> 00:58:03,880 Speaker 4: See you next time. 1104 00:58:04,000 --> 00:58:05,680 Speaker 3: We'll see you guys next week. 1105 00:58:06,080 --> 00:58:09,840 Speaker 6: Bye bye, More more Better. 1106 00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:12,240 Speaker 1: Do you have something you'd like to be more better 1107 00:58:12,280 --> 00:58:13,600 Speaker 1: at that you want us to talk about in a 1108 00:58:13,600 --> 00:58:14,360 Speaker 1: future episode? 1109 00:58:14,440 --> 00:58:16,840 Speaker 4: Can you relate to our struggles or have you tried 1110 00:58:16,840 --> 00:58:18,040 Speaker 4: one of our tips and tricks? 1111 00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:21,160 Speaker 1: Shoot us your thoughts and ideas at Morebetter pod at 1112 00:58:21,160 --> 00:58:24,080 Speaker 1: gmail dot com and conclude a voice note if you 1113 00:58:24,080 --> 00:58:26,760 Speaker 1: want to be featured on the pod. Ooh More Better 1114 00:58:26,800 --> 00:58:30,640 Speaker 1: with Stephanie Melissa is a production from Wvsound and iHeartMedia's 1115 00:58:30,680 --> 00:58:35,200 Speaker 1: Mikudura podcast network, hosted by me, Stephanie Beatriz, and Melissa Umiro. 1116 00:58:35,360 --> 00:58:38,840 Speaker 1: More Better is produced by Isis Madrid and Sophie Spencer Zagos. 1117 00:58:39,440 --> 00:58:43,640 Speaker 4: Our executive producers are Stephanie Beatrice, myself, Melissa Flumero, along 1118 00:58:43,680 --> 00:58:47,000 Speaker 4: with Wilmore Valderrama and Leo Klem at WV Sound and 1119 00:58:47,080 --> 00:58:50,520 Speaker 4: ISIS Madrid. This episode was edited by Isis Madrid and 1120 00:58:50,600 --> 00:58:54,040 Speaker 4: engineered by Sean Tracy, and features original music by Madison 1121 00:58:54,080 --> 00:58:56,720 Speaker 4: Davenport and Heylo boy Our. Cover art is by Vincent 1122 00:58:56,760 --> 00:59:00,160 Speaker 4: Remy's and photography by David Avalos. For more podcast us 1123 00:59:00,160 --> 00:59:03,760 Speaker 4: from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever 1124 00:59:03,800 --> 00:59:06,160 Speaker 4: you listen to your favorite shows. See you next week, 1125 00:59:06,320 --> 00:59:08,960 Speaker 4: Buggers Bye,