WEBVTT - New Blood, Same Drama 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:07.760 Hello, gorgeous, it's Lala Kent. Welcome to Untraditionally Lala. Hello, gorgeous, 0:00:07.800 --> 0:00:11.119 Welcome to the bonus episode of Untraditionally Lala. I have 0:00:11.320 --> 0:00:13.280 the human who makes my life or is a piece 0:00:13.360 --> 0:00:17.120 of my life that makes it makes itself untraditional. Hello 0:00:17.239 --> 0:00:20.360 Titi Hi, I have Q and as I know, you 0:00:20.400 --> 0:00:21.959 have to be to the airport. We're all going to 0:00:22.079 --> 0:00:24.680 Utah for Easan's birthday, little Valentine's baby. 0:00:25.239 --> 0:00:26.439 Tried to make a reservation. 0:00:27.960 --> 0:00:32.120 That was the other thing, because birthday it's like everybody, Yeah, we're. 0:00:31.960 --> 0:00:33.479 Going to Brandon's house, our brother. 0:00:34.440 --> 0:00:37.040 But like that's the other thing, Like, let's just go. 0:00:37.000 --> 0:00:41.960 Grab a bite to eat where nowhere Donalds. 0:00:41.960 --> 0:00:42.800 I do like it, little bit. 0:00:43.360 --> 0:00:47.120 Gina Lucia wants to know. Should I got to know? 0:00:47.159 --> 0:00:48.640 Why are your episodes so short? 0:00:48.680 --> 0:00:51.760 Now? I still love listening, but it's a bummer. By 0:00:51.840 --> 0:00:54.800 the way, I get this a lot. You are seen, 0:00:55.120 --> 0:00:58.760 you are heard. I don't like change. No one likes change. 0:00:58.800 --> 0:01:01.400 You guys talk about the app. I get it. I 0:01:01.440 --> 0:01:03.360 totally get it, and I just want you to rock 0:01:03.440 --> 0:01:07.640 with me because your listenership is like you guys are 0:01:07.640 --> 0:01:09.680 like my friends. It's the one place I can come 0:01:09.760 --> 0:01:13.679 to share about my life, be open and honest. The 0:01:13.760 --> 0:01:18.039 pod meaning you guys, that I've created is so incredible 0:01:18.080 --> 0:01:20.840 and I appreciate you sticking with me. This podcast I 0:01:20.880 --> 0:01:23.640 love doing, but it's also responsible for helping me provide 0:01:23.680 --> 0:01:27.000 for my family, so I just want to say thank you. Also, 0:01:27.280 --> 0:01:29.959 I know that the episodes at times have been short. 0:01:30.640 --> 0:01:34.280 We're going We're going back. We hear you, we hear you, 0:01:34.920 --> 0:01:38.600 We're going back, we got you, We're in motion. Ten 0:01:38.680 --> 0:01:41.800 Heather fourteen asks I am losing my daughter to alcohol. 0:01:41.880 --> 0:01:43.480 Is there anything I can say or do to get 0:01:43.520 --> 0:01:46.640 her to change? This one actually broke my heart because 0:01:46.680 --> 0:01:50.640 I feel that back when I was struggling and deep 0:01:50.680 --> 0:01:53.920 in my alcoholism, had anyone said anything, and by the 0:01:53.920 --> 0:01:56.640 way people did, I was not ready to hear it. 0:01:57.160 --> 0:01:59.400 In fact, I would push them away. They were ruining 0:01:59.400 --> 0:02:01.360 my good time. I had to come to it on 0:02:01.400 --> 0:02:03.360 my own. And I think that this is the most 0:02:03.360 --> 0:02:06.680 difficult thing that you're going to hear. I think you 0:02:06.840 --> 0:02:11.720 have that conversation with her and express your concerns, but 0:02:11.840 --> 0:02:14.520 you have to accept that you may have to love 0:02:14.560 --> 0:02:18.079 her from afar. I saw the other day Mom sent 0:02:18.120 --> 0:02:22.720 me a message that the girl and I'm blinking on 0:02:22.800 --> 0:02:25.320 her name. She used to be on Real Housewives of 0:02:25.360 --> 0:02:29.520 OC and she had two daughters. It was a Lexus 0:02:29.560 --> 0:02:31.639 and one another and if you guys remember like season two, 0:02:31.800 --> 0:02:35.200 I think the girls like loved to drink Lynn thank you. 0:02:35.360 --> 0:02:36.160 Her name is Lynn. 0:02:36.639 --> 0:02:41.000 One of her daughters was spotted in Orange County missing fingers. 0:02:40.520 --> 0:02:42.280 Didn't have teeth. She said. 0:02:42.280 --> 0:02:44.960 Her family lives in San Diego. They've disowned her because 0:02:44.960 --> 0:02:47.720 she couldn't get sober. She dabbled in heroin and then 0:02:47.760 --> 0:02:49.880 went to feentanyl and her life went downhill from there. 0:02:50.240 --> 0:02:53.560 I cannot imagine as a parent having to go through 0:02:53.600 --> 0:02:58.720 that and just praying to some something beyond you to 0:02:58.840 --> 0:03:01.560 like make my child see the light and have them 0:03:01.560 --> 0:03:05.640 come back to me. I am sending you so much love, 0:03:07.320 --> 0:03:10.640 and I hope you know that you're not by yourself, 0:03:10.680 --> 0:03:13.000 and I hope the Easton and I can give you 0:03:13.080 --> 0:03:16.480 hope that your daughter will will see the light. And 0:03:16.520 --> 0:03:20.000 I'm gonna pray for you. Melpite. What does your daily 0:03:20.080 --> 0:03:24.000 routine look like with the kiddos. My daily routine. 0:03:23.560 --> 0:03:27.120 Looks like this. We wake up at seven. Ocean wakes 0:03:27.200 --> 0:03:27.680 up with me. 0:03:28.560 --> 0:03:31.800 Sosa wakes up, I feed the kids, Ocean gets ready 0:03:31.800 --> 0:03:34.160 for school. I get her dressed, I do her hair, 0:03:34.240 --> 0:03:36.640 she brushes her teeth. At that point in time, I 0:03:36.760 --> 0:03:40.600 hand Sosa off to my brother or my mom so 0:03:40.640 --> 0:03:44.440 that I can take Ocean to school. Once I get back, 0:03:44.600 --> 0:03:48.520 I usually have Jenna, who's my friend slash trainer, come 0:03:48.720 --> 0:03:52.160 to work me out while my mom sits upstairs in 0:03:52.200 --> 0:03:54.880 the playroom with Sosa, because that's where my little workout 0:03:54.920 --> 0:03:58.560 corner is. The nanny arrives by ten and then I 0:03:58.640 --> 0:04:02.040 start my day. I always have to be done by 0:04:02.240 --> 0:04:05.000 around one thirty that I can make it to pick up. 0:04:05.560 --> 0:04:08.520 If I can't there's something that can't be moved easton 0:04:08.600 --> 0:04:09.560 or my mom picked them up. 0:04:10.440 --> 0:04:13.000 You live a crazy life. You usually sorry if I'm 0:04:13.040 --> 0:04:13.280 far it. 0:04:14.160 --> 0:04:17.480 Yeah, I mean if you can't take Ocean to school 0:04:17.520 --> 0:04:20.240 because you're doing something like what we're doing right now. 0:04:20.480 --> 0:04:22.479 Yeah, like this morning, I wouldn't have been able to 0:04:22.839 --> 0:04:25.480 the giegs would have or sometimes you and the geech 0:04:25.600 --> 0:04:26.760 have just a little something. 0:04:27.120 --> 0:04:30.280 But you Yeah, your morning routines are pretty well. 0:04:30.320 --> 0:04:33.599 I'm a creature of habit and I'm thirty five years 0:04:33.600 --> 0:04:36.719 old with two children and the wind blows in the 0:04:36.760 --> 0:04:39.320 wrong direction and I start having a panic attack. So 0:04:39.360 --> 0:04:41.360 it just depends. But I feel like we're pretty structured. 0:04:41.560 --> 0:04:45.000 I mean bedtime for Sosa. We start getting her ready 0:04:45.000 --> 0:04:47.480 to go down at six o'clock and she's in bed 0:04:47.520 --> 0:04:50.880 by six thirty, and Ocean slowly. 0:04:50.520 --> 0:04:53.880 Follows, Yeah, I don't really know. Yeah, I mean, I 0:04:53.880 --> 0:04:55.240 see you guys music video. 0:04:55.880 --> 0:05:00.000 It's dinner time, it's vitamin time, Russia freaking teeth time. 0:05:00.120 --> 0:05:02.520 Braid your hair, because if you don't breid Ocean's hair, 0:05:02.560 --> 0:05:07.359 it is a rat's nest. Kathy Hannah four, When is 0:05:07.400 --> 0:05:09.800 he going to fix his hair? 0:05:11.120 --> 0:05:14.440 Nothing to fix? Nothing to fix. 0:05:13.960 --> 0:05:18.200 This beauty, We asked Ocean every buddy. No, I'm on 0:05:18.279 --> 0:05:20.720 my last leg with this hair that. 0:05:20.760 --> 0:05:23.080 Makes me so sad. I love it so much. 0:05:23.120 --> 0:05:26.839 I do want to cut it. It's getting there, I 0:05:26.920 --> 0:05:30.560 will say, I asked. I asked Ocean. I was like, 0:05:30.560 --> 0:05:33.160 I'm going to cut it, and she said no, and 0:05:33.200 --> 0:05:34.919 she almost got teary eyed, and I said, I'm not 0:05:34.920 --> 0:05:37.240 cutting it. We were in the car. She goes, you 0:05:37.279 --> 0:05:39.359 can't cut it, and I said, all right, I won't. 0:05:39.440 --> 0:05:42.479 So now it's like Ocean, could she get over it? Yes, 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:44.360 but I think I'm going to go one more year. 0:05:44.640 --> 0:05:45.920 I think you go one more year. 0:05:46.040 --> 0:05:46.560 I love it. 0:05:46.640 --> 0:05:48.080 I think it's so freaking cool. 0:05:48.120 --> 0:05:50.320 And anyone who's like comments on it that they don't 0:05:50.400 --> 0:05:52.400 like it, I would just totally ignore them because it 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:55.520 doesn't have what you like for years. Yeah, Like, imagine 0:05:55.560 --> 0:05:57.400 if I went on to some random woman's Instagram and 0:05:57.400 --> 0:05:58.680 I was like, I really hate your hair. 0:05:58.560 --> 0:06:00.560 That thing I've like. 0:06:00.600 --> 0:06:02.320 I'm going on my for you page and I see 0:06:02.360 --> 0:06:05.440 people that like are a little different, and I guarantee 0:06:05.440 --> 0:06:08.040 they look at me the same way. And never once 0:06:08.279 --> 0:06:10.400 have I clicked on it and gone, I gotta fucking 0:06:10.440 --> 0:06:11.080 write something. 0:06:11.480 --> 0:06:14.240 No, it's beyond I just go, wow, good for you. 0:06:14.720 --> 0:06:17.960 So to answer your question, Kathy, three here, it's fixed. 0:06:18.640 --> 0:06:19.279 It's fixed. 0:06:20.160 --> 0:06:21.920 It takes a lot of work to get that hair 0:06:23.040 --> 0:06:25.320 just past twelve. What is the best therapy for an 0:06:25.320 --> 0:06:26.279 alcohol addiction? 0:06:27.440 --> 0:06:29.800 Oh, my goodness, I will say routine. 0:06:30.120 --> 0:06:31.800 And the one thing I fall in love with is 0:06:31.839 --> 0:06:34.600 I have a five minute journal, uh, five minutes in 0:06:34.640 --> 0:06:36.559 the morning, five minutes a night. I kind of write 0:06:36.600 --> 0:06:38.880 out little things that it, you know. 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:39.640 Wants me to do. 0:06:39.720 --> 0:06:42.039 But it kind of sounds stupid, but it kind of 0:06:42.279 --> 0:06:45.200 puts me in a good, a good headspace for that. 0:06:45.440 --> 0:06:49.799 And then I hit a lot of meetings on Zoom. 0:06:50.240 --> 0:06:52.000 Even if I don't like have my camera on or 0:06:52.040 --> 0:06:55.960 like I'm not being active, I listen. I listen to 0:06:56.000 --> 0:06:58.520 podcasts too. I can even put a couple down that 0:06:58.600 --> 0:07:00.920 I that I listened to. I'll put I'll send him 0:07:00.920 --> 0:07:01.839 to you so you can put it. 0:07:01.839 --> 0:07:04.360 I would like that because I've been too many therapists, 0:07:04.400 --> 0:07:06.320 and as you guys know, if you've been following me, 0:07:06.480 --> 0:07:10.000 I've had a traumatic experience with a therapist. So I'm 0:07:11.320 --> 0:07:13.040 that's a whole other set of issues, one that I 0:07:13.080 --> 0:07:13.880 haven't got. 0:07:13.840 --> 0:07:16.000 In all the self work I've done. There's one. 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:19.160 There's things that I go I haven't worked on that yet. 0:07:19.200 --> 0:07:23.240 Like I'm still very skeptical of therapist for me having 0:07:23.520 --> 0:07:25.000 for me me. 0:07:26.680 --> 0:07:28.800 Having my sponsor there it is. 0:07:28.840 --> 0:07:30.720 I wanted to say, that is because. 0:07:30.480 --> 0:07:32.960 Her sponsor had a sponsor, and her sponsor had a sponsor, 0:07:33.000 --> 0:07:34.240 and you have to find the right one. 0:07:34.480 --> 0:07:36.800 Yes, just because I have to say this or I'll forget. 0:07:37.200 --> 0:07:39.080 Do you know how far away you are from Bill? 0:07:39.360 --> 0:07:42.320 Bill w No, I should have ask that. Yeah, I'm 0:07:42.360 --> 0:07:44.560 only five away, So he sponsored him, and then my 0:07:44.680 --> 0:07:47.960 sponsor sponsors me. On number five five away from Bill 0:07:48.120 --> 0:07:51.040 wo wrote the book I'm going to ask it's a very. 0:07:50.960 --> 0:07:53.200 Good thing to ask. Yeah, so like that's you. 0:07:53.480 --> 0:07:57.480 I have found my My therapy comes from talking to 0:07:57.640 --> 0:08:00.320 my sponsor, who has been in the program for very 0:08:00.320 --> 0:08:04.280 long time. And it's like dating, you have to find 0:08:04.280 --> 0:08:06.120 the right one. And if you don't find the right one, 0:08:06.280 --> 0:08:09.480 it's okay to say, like to move on from the 0:08:09.480 --> 0:08:14.160 the partnership, relationship sponsorship. That is what I think has 0:08:14.160 --> 0:08:16.120 saved me. That's where all my work has come from. 0:08:16.200 --> 0:08:18.240 Yeah, I can't tell you how many times I've called 0:08:18.280 --> 0:08:22.400 my sponsor crying, telling them I feel off. And every 0:08:22.760 --> 0:08:26.120 time I get off that phone, it's like it's a reset. 0:08:26.360 --> 0:08:29.320 Yeah, are you still on the peptide train? I know 0:08:29.400 --> 0:08:31.800 you briefly mentioned it, but curious This is from Moles 0:08:31.840 --> 0:08:32.440 one two five. 0:08:34.120 --> 0:08:38.280 Yes I am, but I get to get back on 0:08:38.320 --> 0:08:40.600 the one the I can cycles. 0:08:40.679 --> 0:08:42.160 You don't just continue doing. 0:08:42.160 --> 0:08:45.280 So like I did it when I first got sober 0:08:45.640 --> 0:08:48.640 August is when I started like the THHC, the thymysin 0:08:49.640 --> 0:08:53.840 and HC TCH or HCT. 0:08:55.080 --> 0:08:56.840 I don't think it's any of those, but it's severally 0:08:56.920 --> 0:08:58.480 not THHC because you would not be. 0:09:01.400 --> 0:09:04.000 Instead of smoking it, I just jacked. 0:09:03.800 --> 0:09:04.680 It into my stomach. 0:09:04.920 --> 0:09:09.000 But whatever it is, I have to wait for six months, 0:09:09.200 --> 0:09:11.959 and so that six months has come up. So when 0:09:12.000 --> 0:09:14.000 I get home from my vacation, I'll probably go back 0:09:14.040 --> 0:09:14.679 in and get the. 0:09:15.200 --> 0:09:19.760 I finished my cycle, I think the end of October. 0:09:20.640 --> 0:09:22.520 Yeah, you can go on it again. 0:09:22.600 --> 0:09:26.679 If here's why you guys. You guys know I hate shots. 0:09:26.800 --> 0:09:29.240 I loved the way the peptides made me feel, but 0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:32.840 the poking myself every day is a lot, and I 0:09:32.880 --> 0:09:33.840 don't think I can do it. 0:09:34.800 --> 0:09:35.640 I don't think I can do it. 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:37.360 I say she could do it in pill form. 0:09:37.920 --> 0:09:38.600 That I would do. 0:09:38.760 --> 0:09:41.160 But I had a needle that was a little doll 0:09:41.200 --> 0:09:42.720 and I went to do it and it didn't go in, 0:09:42.800 --> 0:09:44.400 and then I tried again and it didn't go in. 0:09:44.440 --> 0:09:45.959 And then I went again and tried to push, and 0:09:46.000 --> 0:09:46.800 I was like, I can't do this. 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:51.440 I'm done. I'm gonna throw up. 0:09:51.760 --> 0:09:52.560 That's for the bad. 0:09:53.320 --> 0:09:56.480 I'm not going to say this person's name. I'm a teacher, 0:09:56.520 --> 0:09:59.240 and my anxiety has been crippling watching you on VPR 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:03.920 and Insta. My joy that brings you joy, brings you 0:10:04.000 --> 0:10:07.400 so much joy to me, I know that feeling of 0:10:07.480 --> 0:10:11.000 having anxiety where you're like this is completely debilitating, but 0:10:11.040 --> 0:10:15.000 like you have to show up for your kids and 0:10:15.200 --> 0:10:17.560 teach our youth. And I hope you know how much 0:10:18.320 --> 0:10:22.040 I you're seen, you're seen, but also how grateful we are, 0:10:22.080 --> 0:10:26.120 like you're in charge of the future. Yes, thank you 0:10:26.120 --> 0:10:28.560 for finishing my sentences. I just think about this all 0:10:28.600 --> 0:10:32.760 the time, that we're paying basketball players to you dribble 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:35.680 a fucking ball around hundreds of millions of dollars. 0:10:35.920 --> 0:10:40.360 Then these teachers. 0:10:38.080 --> 0:10:41.200 One point five million dollar salary minimum. 0:10:41.240 --> 0:10:43.679 That's what are we doing? What are we doing? 0:10:43.720 --> 0:10:46.640 How is this making any sense? So thank you and 0:10:46.840 --> 0:10:51.480 I am very humbled by this message. And also I'm 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:53.920 so happy vander Pump Rules could bring you some joy. 0:10:54.120 --> 0:10:55.839 I hope you haven't made it to season I love 0:10:55.880 --> 0:10:58.280 and yet because you may not like me anymore. 0:10:58.720 --> 0:11:00.000 Yeah, by the way, this is. 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:02.600 To be the last time I mentioned season eleven. I 0:11:02.640 --> 0:11:04.320 am shutting the Scarlet letter. 0:11:05.080 --> 0:11:05.400 Fuck it. 0:11:17.480 --> 0:11:21.080 Sarah duceet for tips for saying sober while getting back 0:11:21.080 --> 0:11:23.120 into dating or without friends. 0:11:23.360 --> 0:11:25.000 Oh, out with friends? 0:11:25.000 --> 0:11:28.440 Sorry, out with friends? Fuck I don't know. 0:11:29.559 --> 0:11:29.800 I do. 0:11:30.240 --> 0:11:34.280 I mean, I don't. Yeah, before you date, Yeah, don't 0:11:34.360 --> 0:11:37.920 date if you're so I I mean, I that's the thing. 0:11:37.960 --> 0:11:41.080 I don't even know how to date because I don't. Yeah. 0:11:41.720 --> 0:11:44.680 I just think every time I go out a couple 0:11:44.679 --> 0:11:48.560 of deep breasts. I am enough. I am enough who 0:11:48.559 --> 0:11:49.200 will find me? 0:11:49.720 --> 0:11:53.240 Will find and find find your drink, like I have 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:55.319 the equivalents. And by the way, this is going to 0:11:55.400 --> 0:11:58.800 be I also have Amy is a kent that is. 0:11:58.800 --> 0:12:02.080 So funny on into the family instead of a music hunt, 0:12:02.320 --> 0:12:05.480 a music hunt that is so good I want That 0:12:05.600 --> 0:12:07.040 is my Instagram name. 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:14.440 Anyway, back to this, find your find your drink of choice, 0:12:14.480 --> 0:12:18.760 like I have equivalents. My vodka soda is like my 0:12:18.960 --> 0:12:22.320 diet coke. That's that's the equivalent. Or like if we're 0:12:22.320 --> 0:12:26.120 going to a club, which never happens, I have a 0:12:26.160 --> 0:12:29.160 red bull I've like and and I'll put it. 0:12:29.080 --> 0:12:31.240 In a shot glass and like take it with whoever 0:12:31.320 --> 0:12:32.440 is I'll get it. 0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:33.880 I'll get a red bull and I get it in 0:12:33.960 --> 0:12:37.360 a cocktail glass. So if you want a can and 0:12:37.360 --> 0:12:38.960 I say can, I get it in a cocktail glass. 0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:40.760 Or I'll do a pineapple juice for my. 0:12:40.679 --> 0:12:45.160 Little pineapples, pineapple and a short glass because it's flash 0:12:45.240 --> 0:12:47.960 of soda water li i'me on the side, I'm fucking 0:12:48.000 --> 0:12:48.320 it up. 0:12:48.679 --> 0:12:49.200 I'm thinking. 0:12:49.520 --> 0:12:51.600 Is the one thing that I have found out going 0:12:51.600 --> 0:12:54.640 out sober is it's weird for the first like five 0:12:54.720 --> 0:12:56.520 or ten minutes because you're like, what do I do? 0:12:56.600 --> 0:12:57.240 Why am I here? 0:12:57.280 --> 0:12:59.240 But then everybody around you kind of gets drunk, and 0:12:59.240 --> 0:13:01.640 then you're like, all right, I'm sober, everybody's drunk. Now 0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:03.880 I can kind of calm down, and then something in 0:13:03.920 --> 0:13:06.080 the hand is really what kind of calms me down? 0:13:06.360 --> 0:13:08.319 Or I'll get like an o'dul's or like a heigh 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:09.000 and easy ara now. 0:13:09.040 --> 0:13:10.280 But some people can't handle that. 0:13:10.720 --> 0:13:15.720 Like I'm able to drink non alcoholic beverages without feeling triggered, 0:13:16.000 --> 0:13:18.120 but I don't want to tell someone go do that, 0:13:18.280 --> 0:13:21.760 because it could be everybody's sobriety. 0:13:21.320 --> 0:13:22.120 Journey is different. 0:13:22.320 --> 0:13:26.200 Yes, you have to know that when you're a sober person, 0:13:26.559 --> 0:13:28.960 you have to be staying sober for yourself because the 0:13:29.000 --> 0:13:32.800 world around you does not change. Life still happens. People 0:13:32.880 --> 0:13:36.080 who are normies go out and have cocktails. There's gonna 0:13:36.080 --> 0:13:39.400 be things around you that could be triggering. So what 0:13:39.440 --> 0:13:43.080 do we have control over ourselves? If I know that 0:13:43.320 --> 0:13:47.160 having a glass of non alcoholic rose, which is everywhere, 0:13:47.160 --> 0:13:49.200 there are so many brands because gen z is like 0:13:49.320 --> 0:13:53.520 anti alcohol, I have to know this is something I control. 0:13:53.640 --> 0:13:56.040 This triggers me. I'm not having it well. 0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:58.920 And that is yes, see for okay, And that all 0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:02.199 what I will say is keep to what doesn't trigger you. 0:14:02.520 --> 0:14:05.359 But having something in your hand, even if it's water. 0:14:05.280 --> 0:14:07.800 I know. But that's why Amy is a kent. My 0:14:07.960 --> 0:14:09.320 wife is seven months sober. 0:14:09.360 --> 0:14:12.440 Can you please share some encouraging words slash things that 0:14:12.520 --> 0:14:16.959 helped you. It's such a hard it's such a hard 0:14:17.080 --> 0:14:20.400 point to go through when they first get sober. 0:14:20.480 --> 0:14:21.960 Seven months, that's that's. 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:26.120 A You've got a good amount of time, but it's 0:14:26.160 --> 0:14:28.760 still a very vulnerable state. And keep in mind, very 0:14:28.840 --> 0:14:31.760 humbling thing to think about is you could be sober 0:14:31.840 --> 0:14:35.520 for twenty four years and in a matter of seconds 0:14:35.800 --> 0:14:38.480 you are back in the room a day winner. Like literally, 0:14:38.560 --> 0:14:40.520 you could have all the time in the world. But 0:14:41.200 --> 0:14:44.200 someone who's got you know, seven years on me, we're 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:46.560 both one slip away from being at the exact same 0:14:46.600 --> 0:14:48.760 point in time. I think the only thing that I 0:14:48.760 --> 0:14:52.680 can say to you is I think ask your wife, 0:14:53.640 --> 0:14:55.800 do a check in every day? How are you feeling 0:14:55.840 --> 0:14:59.360 in your sobriety? Are you If she says that she's struggling, 0:14:59.680 --> 0:15:02.560 that's a okay, that's normal. How do we work through this? 0:15:02.640 --> 0:15:04.920 What can I do to take the load off of 0:15:04.960 --> 0:15:06.840 you so you know you're not in this by yourself? 0:15:07.280 --> 0:15:10.880 I think constant communication is massively huge. 0:15:11.240 --> 0:15:15.680 Yeah, a lot active too, because most you know, most 0:15:15.680 --> 0:15:18.400 alcoholics myself I'm kind of speaking for I would just 0:15:18.480 --> 0:15:19.280 drink and do nothing. 0:15:19.360 --> 0:15:21.160 So like once I was sober, it. 0:15:21.200 --> 0:15:24.920 Was like, I need to go out and be in 0:15:24.960 --> 0:15:27.800 the world because if I'm not, my only thought is 0:15:28.040 --> 0:15:28.920 I'm sitting here. 0:15:29.000 --> 0:15:31.840 I want to drink, So I need to go out. 0:15:32.520 --> 0:15:36.200 Miss beck Burke, what is different filming the Valley than 0:15:36.280 --> 0:15:39.960 VPR Just the name I've done to I've talked about this. 0:15:40.800 --> 0:15:43.400 Vanner Pump Rules was a well oiled machine. By the 0:15:43.400 --> 0:15:45.560 time I came on, they had done four seasons. They 0:15:45.600 --> 0:15:49.800 were also in their you know, mid to late twenties, 0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:52.920 early thirties, still trying to figure out life and we 0:15:53.080 --> 0:15:56.600 it was just chaotic and easy. Everyone had nothing to lose. 0:15:57.000 --> 0:16:00.240 The Valley they've only done two seasons. I came on 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:02.320 the third. There were a lot of times where I 0:16:02.360 --> 0:16:04.840 was like, Oh, this is different. These these people haven't 0:16:04.880 --> 0:16:07.640 done this before, and I can tell. 0:16:08.040 --> 0:16:09.160 But I also I think. 0:16:09.080 --> 0:16:12.800 The biggest thing was I didn't know my place because 0:16:12.880 --> 0:16:15.520 even though I'm friends with Michelle and Janet, I've never 0:16:15.560 --> 0:16:18.560 filmed a show with them. It's a different freaking beast. 0:16:19.760 --> 0:16:22.200 Brittany I filmed with a million times. She fucking knows 0:16:22.200 --> 0:16:24.760 the drill. She knows what's going on. Dody fucking knows 0:16:24.840 --> 0:16:28.800 the drill too. Of the most iconic reality TV personalities 0:16:29.080 --> 0:16:32.280 on the planet, like we were all good there, the 0:16:32.280 --> 0:16:35.520 rest of them, it was like, oh, okay, we need 0:16:36.760 --> 0:16:38.720 we need some more years under our belt because we 0:16:38.720 --> 0:16:41.640 don't quite know how to do this. And then the 0:16:41.680 --> 0:16:45.560 way that they start up drama like what happened last week. 0:16:45.640 --> 0:16:51.040 I'm like, bro, bro, I'm off the clock. Honey, I'm 0:16:51.080 --> 0:16:55.040 off the clock. Let me know when when cameras picked 0:16:55.040 --> 0:16:56.320 back up, and I'll give a shit about this. 0:16:56.560 --> 0:16:59.359 Until then, I just want to text this sexy. 0:16:59.040 --> 0:17:02.240 Man and like not give one damn about any of that. 0:17:02.320 --> 0:17:05.920 Like I'm living in in Lauren's world now. Laala will 0:17:06.080 --> 0:17:09.399 back in in a minute. Starshine one two four. Is 0:17:09.440 --> 0:17:11.640 Laala going to be on the Valley as a full 0:17:11.640 --> 0:17:14.920 time cast member? Yes, my love, I hope that makes 0:17:14.960 --> 0:17:21.080 you excited AofA underscore x Laala? How did you cope 0:17:21.080 --> 0:17:27.480 with not vaping when pregnant? Just found out I'm pregnant? Congratulations, congratulations? 0:17:28.080 --> 0:17:32.880 It was actually not that hard because I knew, I mean, 0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:36.760 with Sosa was very like I knew that I was 0:17:36.800 --> 0:17:42.320 going in to be inciminated well before, like the process 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:45.040 had started months in advance, so I knew, I have 0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:49.040 to give this up because I'm trying to get pregnant. 0:17:49.920 --> 0:17:53.040 And then once I was pregnant, it was like, I 0:17:53.240 --> 0:17:53.840 obviously I. 0:17:53.840 --> 0:17:58.720 Can't a bit easier, Yeah, and for that somebody. 0:17:58.400 --> 0:18:00.960 That, yeah, but I should give for my kids now. 0:18:01.000 --> 0:18:03.800 But there was just some It's like, I have this 0:18:03.920 --> 0:18:07.280 little baby in my stomach, who I am, who is 0:18:07.280 --> 0:18:09.840 depending on me to live healthy so that they can 0:18:09.880 --> 0:18:11.879 be healthy, and there's already so much that could go 0:18:11.960 --> 0:18:15.160 wrong that I'm not going to like do anything that 0:18:16.000 --> 0:18:16.720 could make. 0:18:16.560 --> 0:18:19.399 Shit go wrong. And it just was very easy. 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:19.720 Now. 0:18:20.280 --> 0:18:22.600 There weren't moments where I saw Easton. There were moments 0:18:22.600 --> 0:18:23.080 east when. 0:18:22.960 --> 0:18:24.639 It hit the vape and I'd be like, oh, the 0:18:24.720 --> 0:18:27.320 moment I dropped this kid and I'm dumb breastfeeding, I'm 0:18:27.359 --> 0:18:28.520 fucking smacking the shit out of it. 0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:33.040 Honestly, chew a lot. 0:18:32.880 --> 0:18:34.600 Of gum, toothpicks. 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:37.040 Toothpicks, you'll be fine. 0:18:37.119 --> 0:18:38.960 Just every time you want to hit it, remember you've 0:18:39.000 --> 0:18:41.680 got this like innocent baby growing inside of you. There's 0:18:41.840 --> 0:18:43.800 enough shit that could go wrong. You don't need to 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:47.439 help with that. Don't pick up the vape, please, for 0:18:47.520 --> 0:18:50.439 the love of God. I know it's hard, but it 0:18:50.440 --> 0:18:53.760 ain't worth it. There are sometimes where I'm like to 0:18:53.800 --> 0:18:55.080 give up the vape. You know what I need to do. 0:18:55.160 --> 0:18:58.760 I need to get pregnant. Oh sure, I give it up? Then, 0:19:10.880 --> 0:19:14.560 Sid Price. How does one know when to walk away 0:19:14.560 --> 0:19:18.359 from a relationship? I'm so scared, but it's bad. You know, 0:19:18.960 --> 0:19:19.640 now is the time? 0:19:19.720 --> 0:19:22.280 If you're asking if it's the time, it's the time. 0:19:23.080 --> 0:19:25.199 I learned this in sobriety, but I think it applies 0:19:25.240 --> 0:19:27.640 to every part of life. You don't need to wait 0:19:27.680 --> 0:19:30.119 for the elevator to hit the bottom floor before you 0:19:30.160 --> 0:19:34.760 get off. If it's bad, get the fuck off the elevator. 0:19:35.880 --> 0:19:37.639 I would start teeing up my game plan. 0:19:38.600 --> 0:19:39.359 Don't let him know. 0:19:39.520 --> 0:19:41.960 I don't know if what your situation is like what 0:19:42.040 --> 0:19:44.600