WEBVTT - Nobody Should Believe Me — S5 E1 0:00:00.560 --> 0:00:03.040 Before we begin, a quick warning that in this show 0:00:03.080 --> 0:00:06.080 we discussed child abuse and this content may be difficult 0:00:06.120 --> 0:00:08.840 for some listeners. If you, or anyone you know is 0:00:08.880 --> 0:00:11.440 a victim or survivor of medical child abuse, please go 0:00:11.480 --> 0:00:14.800 to munchhausensupport dot com to connect with professionals who can help. 0:00:22.280 --> 0:00:23.960 There is a family in Renton that I want to 0:00:24.000 --> 0:00:27.600 introduce you to. Mom Sophie went on an inspiring trip 0:00:27.640 --> 0:00:31.200 to Zambia and her college year. She's since adopted two girls. 0:00:31.600 --> 0:00:35.400 One of them has an incredibly rare disorder. Doctors say 0:00:35.760 --> 0:00:37.720 it's a one in a million chance. 0:00:38.560 --> 0:00:40.840 The audio you just heard is from a news story 0:00:40.840 --> 0:00:43.960 that aired on King five television back in May of 0:00:44.000 --> 0:00:48.159 twenty nineteen. This story wasn't on my radar, but I 0:00:48.200 --> 0:00:50.640 had a lot going on back then. I had just 0:00:50.680 --> 0:00:52.680 had a baby and had a new book coming out, 0:00:53.159 --> 0:00:56.000 and this was around the time that Munchausen Biproxy was 0:00:56.120 --> 0:00:59.720 really entering my work life. The month that this story aired, 0:01:00.120 --> 0:01:02.600 I'd done my very first interview about my own family 0:01:02.680 --> 0:01:05.319 story for Vanity Fair, and this was followed by an 0:01:05.319 --> 0:01:08.200 appearance on a local station about my third novel, We 0:01:08.319 --> 0:01:11.399 Came Here to Forget. This was all taking place amid 0:01:11.400 --> 0:01:15.199 the second investigation into my sister for Munchausen biproxy abuse 0:01:15.200 --> 0:01:18.560 of her children. By the middle of that summer, the 0:01:18.600 --> 0:01:21.280 courts would return my sister's children to her, and a 0:01:21.280 --> 0:01:24.039 few months after that, the prosecuting attorney would make the 0:01:24.080 --> 0:01:27.680 decision not to file charges against my sister, Megan Carter, 0:01:28.240 --> 0:01:32.560 despite the horrifying and voluminous evidence against her. But back 0:01:32.600 --> 0:01:36.000 to Sophie in general, seeing stories about sick kids in 0:01:36.040 --> 0:01:38.320 the news is upsetting for a bunch of reasons. 0:01:38.680 --> 0:01:41.880 So family friends are banding together. They're trying to raise money, 0:01:41.920 --> 0:01:45.039 and this is something that is no little ask. We're 0:01:45.040 --> 0:01:48.640 talking about like sixty thousand dollars for a vehicle for them, 0:01:48.760 --> 0:01:51.600 So we just wanted to put their positive energy out there. 0:01:55.480 --> 0:01:58.160 Of course, there are the particular fears and questions that 0:01:58.280 --> 0:02:00.840 I bring to it, given my experience with my sister. 0:02:01.480 --> 0:02:04.160 Is this mom telling the truth? What if this child 0:02:04.240 --> 0:02:06.640 isn't a victim of a rare disease but a victim 0:02:06.640 --> 0:02:10.520 of the person purporting to care for them, even when 0:02:10.560 --> 0:02:12.840 there are no red flags for abuse, which is mostly 0:02:12.880 --> 0:02:16.600 the case. These stories are pretty dystopian because they illuminate 0:02:16.639 --> 0:02:20.079 a tragic feeling of our country's healthcare system, the horrible 0:02:20.120 --> 0:02:23.120 reality that families, many of whom I'm sure would prefer 0:02:23.160 --> 0:02:25.760 to keep their children's health private, are forced into a 0:02:25.800 --> 0:02:28.800 situation where they have to perform their trauma publicly in 0:02:28.840 --> 0:02:31.560 the hopes that kind strangers might step in to relieve 0:02:31.639 --> 0:02:36.120 the skyrocketing medical bills that could otherwise bankrupt their family. So, 0:02:36.160 --> 0:02:38.320 while I usually avoid these types of stories in my 0:02:38.360 --> 0:02:40.640 day to day life, once I did see this news 0:02:40.680 --> 0:02:44.359 report right away, I noticed that Sophie was positioning herself 0:02:44.400 --> 0:02:46.760 as the only one who saw what was happening with 0:02:46.800 --> 0:02:47.280 her child. 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:51.680 I started noticing just kind of weird things or times 0:02:51.720 --> 0:02:54.079 where her body would just feel really different, like it 0:02:54.120 --> 0:02:57.400 would either be super super tight or like really limp. 0:02:57.600 --> 0:03:01.040 Doctor's visits filled the first few years life, and right. 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:04.520 Away they found pretty significant brain damage, and so she 0:03:04.680 --> 0:03:08.919 was diagnosed with CP at the end of twenty fifteen. 0:03:09.600 --> 0:03:17.760 This is a sample, but Sophie quickly realized was experiencing 0:03:17.840 --> 0:03:20.399 something much more concerning. 0:03:20.440 --> 0:03:22.799 Complaining to the ne'real just saying like she's having seizures. 0:03:22.800 --> 0:03:24.480 So they would bring her in for an EEG and 0:03:24.520 --> 0:03:27.320 it was nothing. They're like, no, we don't see anything. 0:03:27.360 --> 0:03:29.560 Maybe she is there's the walls. 0:03:29.720 --> 0:03:33.000 Sophia admits she started to question her own instincts. 0:03:33.400 --> 0:03:36.360 There'd be times where she was like literally totally paralyzed, 0:03:36.360 --> 0:03:38.320 and I go to her doctors and be like, I 0:03:38.400 --> 0:03:41.040 know she's walking right now, but like she was literally 0:03:41.080 --> 0:03:44.240 paralyzed all day yesterday and they'd be like, no, that's 0:03:44.280 --> 0:03:48.520 not possible. I'm like, but like, it's she couldn't move, 0:03:48.640 --> 0:03:50.600 like I'm telling you, and they're like, okay, but she 0:03:50.640 --> 0:03:51.320 can't now, and I'm like. 0:03:51.400 --> 0:03:51.840 Right, I know. 0:03:52.160 --> 0:03:55.960 But after seeking a second opinion and running through genetic testing, 0:03:56.080 --> 0:03:56.800 she also. 0:03:56.560 --> 0:03:59.840 Has one on the ATP one a phree giene which 0:03:59.880 --> 0:04:05.520 is associated with a disorder called alternating hemopolygia childhood, which 0:04:05.560 --> 0:04:09.240 is a extremely rare, one in a million genetic disorder. 0:04:09.280 --> 0:04:13.160 And she's right, it affects one and one million children. 0:04:13.640 --> 0:04:15.960 It is progressive and has no cure. 0:04:16.320 --> 0:04:19.560 Wow, Lord, you took me up to the fullest extent 0:04:19.960 --> 0:04:20.720 on what I told you. 0:04:20.800 --> 0:04:24.320 I was willing to do. This piece on the Evening 0:04:24.360 --> 0:04:26.839 News ended up being the first chapter in what would 0:04:26.880 --> 0:04:30.200 become a major national news story. This is rare for 0:04:30.279 --> 0:04:34.200 Manchessen by proxy cases, which usually Gardner little national coverage 0:04:34.279 --> 0:04:37.400 outside of the truly sensational eyed stories like Gypsy Rose 0:04:37.400 --> 0:04:40.719 Blanchard and Miya Kuwalski. But there were many elements of 0:04:40.760 --> 0:04:44.120 this story that caught people's attention. For one, there were 0:04:44.160 --> 0:04:48.520 the optics. Sophie, who is young, white, blonde, and conventionally pretty, 0:04:48.839 --> 0:04:52.200 had adopted two children, sisters from a far away nation. 0:04:53.920 --> 0:04:56.880 I went to Zambia after my freshman year of college 0:04:57.120 --> 0:05:00.359 on a month long mission trip, and so when I 0:05:00.440 --> 0:05:07.400 was there, I just encounter the plight of an orphan adoption. 0:05:07.560 --> 0:05:09.119 Wasn't on my radar at all. 0:05:09.320 --> 0:05:12.320 In the televised segment, there are images from Sophie's life 0:05:12.320 --> 0:05:15.520 with her two adorable girls, interspersed with footage from the 0:05:15.560 --> 0:05:18.839 interview and b roll of Sophie's younger daughter, who were 0:05:18.839 --> 0:05:22.360 referring to as c, who is smiley and cheerfully dressed, 0:05:22.480 --> 0:05:25.599 in the family's kitchen. At one point, as the two 0:05:25.600 --> 0:05:28.760 play a game together, Sophie sitting beside her daughter's wheelchair, 0:05:29.120 --> 0:05:30.680 the little girl says, this my. 0:05:30.760 --> 0:05:31.680 Radar at all. 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:36.359 You want to get so scared. It would be easy 0:05:36.400 --> 0:05:39.239 to miss this blip in the audio, but the little 0:05:39.240 --> 0:05:41.680 girl is saying, I don't want to get a poke. 0:05:42.040 --> 0:05:45.560 I'm so scared. This moment is odd because they're not 0:05:45.640 --> 0:05:48.560 in a medical setting and there's no medical equipment nearby. 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:52.080 To most this might be a throwaway moment, but for me, 0:05:52.720 --> 0:05:55.919 it's a harbinger of how this seemingly inspiring story of 0:05:55.960 --> 0:05:58.440 a mother who'd moved heaven and earth to help two 0:05:58.520 --> 0:05:59.560 orphans became. 0:06:00.600 --> 0:06:02.120 So this is detective or work with the rents and 0:06:02.160 --> 0:06:05.920 police department. Today's date is March seventeenth to twenty twenty one. 0:06:06.000 --> 0:06:08.240 It is approximately eight oh three hours. 0:06:08.360 --> 0:06:09.640 And then can you just state your name for me? 0:06:09.760 --> 0:06:10.480 Sophie Hartman. 0:06:12.720 --> 0:06:15.719 In twenty nineteen, King five first met Sophie Hartman after 0:06:15.760 --> 0:06:19.039 she adopted two sisters from Zambia. She told us one 0:06:19.120 --> 0:06:23.560 has a rare neurological disorder called alternating Hemiplegia of childhood 0:06:23.800 --> 0:06:26.760 or AHC. At the time, Hartman set up a GoFundMe 0:06:26.839 --> 0:06:30.240 page to raise money for a wheelchair vehicle. Today, she 0:06:30.360 --> 0:06:34.239 faces second degree assault charges against a child, her own daughter. 0:06:34.440 --> 0:06:36.080 This is not based off of one investigator. 0:06:36.080 --> 0:06:38.480 It's not based off of a quick investigation. 0:06:38.560 --> 0:06:42.799 This was months of investigation by police and several experts 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:44.120 who wait in King. 0:06:44.080 --> 0:06:47.480 County prosecutors are accusing Hartman of subjecting her daughter to 0:06:47.560 --> 0:06:52.359 medically unnecessary surgical procedures and restraints. Records say the girl 0:06:52.440 --> 0:06:55.960 underwent more than four hundred and seventy four medical appointments 0:06:56.000 --> 0:06:57.080 since twenty sixteen. 0:06:57.480 --> 0:06:59.960 When the Sophie Hartman case broke, it was the typical 0:07:00.160 --> 0:07:03.400 litany of eye popping numbers of doctor's visits and procedures 0:07:03.400 --> 0:07:06.480 that her daughter had to endure. But this season, we're 0:07:06.480 --> 0:07:10.000 diving into the complicated, many layered story of Sophie Hartman, 0:07:10.480 --> 0:07:13.320 a white evangelical woman from a small town in Michigan 0:07:13.360 --> 0:07:16.400 who traveled thousands of miles to Zambia and returned with 0:07:16.480 --> 0:07:24.840 two vulnerable little girls. People believe their eyes. That's something 0:07:24.920 --> 0:07:28.040 that is so central to this topic, because we do 0:07:28.120 --> 0:07:30.320 believe the people that we love when they're telling us something. 0:07:31.000 --> 0:07:33.480 If we didn't, you could never make it through your day. 0:07:34.480 --> 0:07:37.320 I'm Andrea Dunlop, and this is nobody should believe me. 0:07:45.680 --> 0:07:47.840 If you'd like to support the show, the best way 0:07:47.840 --> 0:07:50.600 to do that is to subscribe on Apple Podcasts or 0:07:50.640 --> 0:07:53.920 on Patreon. You get all episodes early in ad free, 0:07:54.080 --> 0:07:56.960 along with extended cuts and deleted scenes. From the season. 0:07:57.400 --> 0:08:01.520 You also get two exclusive bonus episodes every month, and 0:08:01.840 --> 0:08:05.160 for the first time ever, we have the entire season 0:08:05.400 --> 0:08:08.760 ready for you to binge right now on the subscriber feed. 0:08:09.160 --> 0:08:12.320 That's right. You can listen to every episode of season 0:08:12.360 --> 0:08:15.160 five right this minute if you subscribe to the show, 0:08:15.680 --> 0:08:18.119 and as always, if monetary support is not an option 0:08:18.200 --> 0:08:21.040 for you right now, rating and reviewing the show wherever 0:08:21.080 --> 0:08:24.160 you listen also helps us a great deal. And if 0:08:24.160 --> 0:08:26.800 there's someone you feel needs to hear this show, please 0:08:26.840 --> 0:08:29.200 do share it with them. Word of mouth is so 0:08:29.320 --> 0:08:33.680 important for independent podcasts. For even more, you can also 0:08:33.720 --> 0:08:36.520 find us on YouTube, where we have every episode as 0:08:36.559 --> 0:08:43.360 well as bonus video content. Figuring out where to start 0:08:43.400 --> 0:08:46.440 with these cases can be a challenge, and going in 0:08:46.840 --> 0:08:49.080 I always know that hearing from the person at the 0:08:49.080 --> 0:08:52.840 center of it is probably unlikely. However, in this instance 0:08:53.080 --> 0:08:56.800 we had a pretty compelling source document because Sophie wrote 0:08:56.840 --> 0:08:57.719 a memoir. 0:08:58.200 --> 0:09:01.520 The Strong Ache in my Stomach, that, like homesickness, was 0:09:01.720 --> 0:09:05.720 for another country, a land where children ran freely and 0:09:05.800 --> 0:09:10.120 dust filled every crevice, a place so different and foreign, 0:09:10.640 --> 0:09:13.400 yet one where Heaven met Earth more clearly than I 0:09:13.440 --> 0:09:14.480 had ever seen before. 0:09:15.440 --> 0:09:18.600 That was an excerpt from Sophie Hartman's twenty sixteen self 0:09:18.600 --> 0:09:22.480 published memoir entitled Crowns of Beauty. The book offers her 0:09:22.520 --> 0:09:24.960 first person account of her time in Zambia and her 0:09:25.040 --> 0:09:28.360 journey to adopt her two daughters, Sophie's younger daughter, who 0:09:28.400 --> 0:09:31.719 were referring to as C, and Sophie's older daughter, who 0:09:31.760 --> 0:09:34.360 were referring to as M. The cover is a moody 0:09:34.400 --> 0:09:37.400 professional photo of Sophie carrying her youngest on her hip 0:09:37.520 --> 0:09:40.319 and holding her older daughter by the hand. Born in 0:09:40.400 --> 0:09:42.880 nineteen eighty nine, Sophie Hartman grew up in a small 0:09:42.880 --> 0:09:46.120 town outside of Kalamazoo, Michigan. From what I've been able 0:09:46.160 --> 0:09:48.440 to glean about her childhood, she appears to have had 0:09:48.480 --> 0:09:51.480 a fairly normal, upper middle class life. I've spoken to 0:09:51.520 --> 0:09:53.839 some folks on background who know the family, and they 0:09:53.840 --> 0:09:56.280 told me that they were well off and well respected 0:09:56.320 --> 0:09:59.160 in town. The whole family was also very active in 0:09:59.200 --> 0:10:02.320 the church, and according to Sophie's memoir, she began her 0:10:02.360 --> 0:10:05.440 devout relationship with God at the age of fourteen during 0:10:05.440 --> 0:10:09.040 a Christian summer camp. Sophie was a talented athlete and 0:10:09.120 --> 0:10:13.199 played basketball and soccer growing up and after graduation, went 0:10:13.240 --> 0:10:16.240 on to college, and then, according to her book, a 0:10:16.280 --> 0:10:19.160 summer mission trip prompted her to leave school about two 0:10:19.200 --> 0:10:21.640 and a half years early, changing the course of her life. 0:10:22.840 --> 0:10:26.440 Scene at Kafui screams of a divine artist's touch, one 0:10:26.480 --> 0:10:30.360 that faithfully brings forth beauty each day. Within moments of 0:10:30.360 --> 0:10:32.839 setting foot on the soil. That day in two thousand 0:10:32.880 --> 0:10:36.599 and eight, draped behind the fierce beauty of Kafui's landscape, 0:10:36.880 --> 0:10:39.760 I witnessed the torments of everyday life by the people 0:10:39.760 --> 0:10:44.160 who called this compound home. I saw malner'sh children ply 0:10:44.440 --> 0:10:48.440 their way through sewage drains, chewing on plastic bags, and 0:10:48.520 --> 0:10:53.400 my heart burned in my chest. Filthy, unclothed babies crawling 0:10:53.440 --> 0:10:56.280 alone in the middle of the street caught me completely 0:10:56.320 --> 0:11:01.360 off guard, their desperate, empty eyes gazing lifelessly back at mine. 0:11:01.559 --> 0:11:05.240 The dramatic and contrasting reality that was present every day 0:11:05.280 --> 0:11:08.679 in Kafui devastated me, and I've never been the same. 0:11:09.720 --> 0:11:13.319 But maybe I had been missing something. Maybe beauty could 0:11:13.400 --> 0:11:16.160 always be found in places long thought to be dark, 0:11:16.520 --> 0:11:21.079 and maybe beauty could still surface in places of utter darkness, 0:11:21.640 --> 0:11:24.079 that is, if someone was willing to fight for it. 0:11:25.240 --> 0:11:27.319 Sophie appears to have been in and out of Zambia 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:30.640 from roughly two thousand and eight to twenty fifteen, but 0:11:30.679 --> 0:11:33.480 the details of where she was and with whom are 0:11:33.480 --> 0:11:37.320 obscured in her memoir. In fact, everything about her time 0:11:37.360 --> 0:11:40.280 there is obscured, as she notes to the reader that 0:11:40.320 --> 0:11:42.520 she's changed the names of not only the people who 0:11:42.520 --> 0:11:44.760 appear in the book, but even many of the towns 0:11:44.760 --> 0:11:47.640 that she lived in and traveled to. I can certainly 0:11:47.760 --> 0:11:50.719 understand changing the names of people to protect their privacy, 0:11:51.080 --> 0:11:53.360 but the links she goes to to hide the details 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.200 of her life there are somewhat extraordinary given that this 0:11:56.240 --> 0:12:00.240 is a memoir. Notably, in her acknowledgments, which here in 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:02.679 the opening pages of the book, she thinks a large 0:12:02.720 --> 0:12:05.640 number of Americans by name, But given that the memoirs 0:12:05.640 --> 0:12:08.080 focused on her time in another country, her words of 0:12:08.120 --> 0:12:10.880 thanks to the folks in Zambia are strikingly different. 0:12:11.720 --> 0:12:15.680 My big Zambian family, you have changed my life forever. 0:12:16.360 --> 0:12:20.000 Thank you for not just being eager but ecstatic about 0:12:20.000 --> 0:12:22.840 this book, and thank you for letting me tell those stories. 0:12:23.400 --> 0:12:25.960 I'm so grateful we'll get to be together in the 0:12:26.000 --> 0:12:29.760 age to come. I look forward to amazing chocolates and 0:12:29.880 --> 0:12:33.240 the biggest pillow fights forever. You are beautiful to. 0:12:33.240 --> 0:12:38.560 Me, and that is it. I've written acknowledgments of my 0:12:38.640 --> 0:12:42.520 own for five books now, and especially on the first one. 0:12:42.760 --> 0:12:46.840 You name just literally every person ever, like the barista 0:12:46.840 --> 0:12:48.760 who got your coffee while you were writing in the morning, 0:12:48.840 --> 0:12:52.199 your third grade teacher, your dog walker. If these Zambian 0:12:52.280 --> 0:12:55.480 friends were so ecstatic about the book, why aren't we 0:12:55.520 --> 0:12:59.360 thinking any of them by name. The book is largely 0:12:59.400 --> 0:13:02.560 focused on time abroad, and we're given scant details of 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:06.040 Sophie's life before in Michigan. In fact, we mostly hear 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:09.080 about how much resistance she encountered for a decision to 0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:11.280 go to Zambia. 0:13:11.400 --> 0:13:15.160 A believer very near to me aggressively questioned my decision, 0:13:15.400 --> 0:13:18.440 What did you know about helping people in Africa? And 0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:21.120 how do you think you can handle all the poverty 0:13:21.200 --> 0:13:24.440 and the horrible situations when you have never experienced that. 0:13:24.880 --> 0:13:27.480 You will not be safe And all I'll be able 0:13:27.520 --> 0:13:30.360 to say when you come home is I told you so. 0:13:31.800 --> 0:13:34.920 And look, I can imagine that Sophie's parents were probably 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:37.160 a bit dismayed at the idea of their daughter dropping 0:13:37.160 --> 0:13:40.880 out of college to move to Zambia. However, an idealistic 0:13:40.880 --> 0:13:43.400 college kid heading out to save the world is so 0:13:43.480 --> 0:13:46.600 common it's a cliche. We all know the guy who 0:13:46.679 --> 0:13:48.920 goes on to be an accountant but never shuts up 0:13:48.920 --> 0:13:51.720 about his time in the Peace Corps. But Sophie's description 0:13:51.960 --> 0:13:55.480 of the town's reaction to her decision elevates her to 0:13:55.520 --> 0:13:56.960 the status of martyr. 0:13:57.960 --> 0:14:01.320 Images of leaving my upper class at youation and culture 0:14:01.800 --> 0:14:05.319 and stepping into the dusty lives of children deemed filth 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:08.559 triggered thoughts of a scripture passage I had read time 0:14:08.640 --> 0:14:12.319 and time again. Speak up for those who cannot speak 0:14:12.360 --> 0:14:15.439 for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute, 0:14:16.000 --> 0:14:19.120 Speak up and judge fairly, defend the rights of the 0:14:19.160 --> 0:14:22.120 poor and needy, Proverbs thirty one to eight nine. 0:14:23.640 --> 0:14:25.920 In the beginning sections of the book, we also hear 0:14:26.040 --> 0:14:30.200 from Sophie's little sister, Sam, who contributes journal entries describing 0:14:30.240 --> 0:14:31.720 the change she sees in her sister. 0:14:32.640 --> 0:14:36.000 I saw Sophie walking through a towering doorway, given away 0:14:36.000 --> 0:14:39.200 by her bright blonde hair and beaming smile. She rolled 0:14:39.200 --> 0:14:41.760 two large suitcases behind her, and she was wrapped in 0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:45.480 colorful Zambian fabric. I clung to Sophie's right side the 0:14:45.640 --> 0:14:48.400 entire ride, wide eyed and in awe of my big sister, 0:14:48.440 --> 0:14:50.640 who looked like an African princess. 0:14:51.640 --> 0:14:55.120 After her initial trip, Sophie returned less than a year later, 0:14:55.240 --> 0:15:00.000 and at nineteen, started interning for an orphan sponsorship ministry. 0:15:00.120 --> 0:15:03.000 That was where Sophie would find her true calling. 0:15:11.800 --> 0:15:14.800 He has called me to Zambia. I was there, and 0:15:14.840 --> 0:15:17.040 then he told me he wants me to move there. 0:15:17.600 --> 0:15:21.360 I'm still in college, but I'm leaving soon. He's called 0:15:21.400 --> 0:15:23.760 me to be a mother in this nation. He has 0:15:23.760 --> 0:15:25.840 called me to serve these children and to be a 0:15:25.920 --> 0:15:29.440 voice for those who have no voice. It's crazy. Most 0:15:29.480 --> 0:15:31.480 of my friends and family are trying to stop me 0:15:31.520 --> 0:15:35.320 from going, but I can't say no. I love Jesus. 0:15:35.960 --> 0:15:40.800 I love him. I love him. Oh, I love him. 0:15:43.360 --> 0:15:47.760 Reading this book was a disorienting experience, given the context 0:15:47.920 --> 0:15:51.080 a young white evangelical setting out to quote save the 0:15:51.120 --> 0:15:54.280 people of Zambia. I was expecting the writing to be 0:15:54.320 --> 0:15:57.480 a bit problematic, but it was also settling in for 0:15:57.520 --> 0:15:59.880 what might at very least be an interesting fish out 0:15:59.920 --> 0:16:03.240 of water story of someone leaving everything they've ever known, 0:16:03.640 --> 0:16:05.880 and I didn't know anything about Zambia, so I was 0:16:05.920 --> 0:16:08.280 looking forward to hearing the little details about day to 0:16:08.360 --> 0:16:10.760 day life. You notice so much when you're in a 0:16:10.800 --> 0:16:14.200 new place. It's what makes traveling abroad so thrilling. Suddenly, 0:16:14.240 --> 0:16:16.760 everything from the food to the fashion, to the local 0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:20.480 shopping habits and modes of transportation are new and fascinating. 0:16:21.200 --> 0:16:23.280 I was also quite curious to know what a twenty 0:16:23.320 --> 0:16:26.240 year old college kid even does when they land in Zambia, 0:16:26.640 --> 0:16:29.800 and after reading the nearly two hundred pages of this memoir, 0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:34.400 I learned none of that. Reading this book was the 0:16:34.440 --> 0:16:37.240 beginning of an experience that I continue to have as 0:16:37.280 --> 0:16:40.120 I try to get a handle on Sophie's story. It's 0:16:40.160 --> 0:16:42.880 like the closer I get to it, the more it pixelates. 0:16:43.040 --> 0:16:45.440 It's like trying to see through layers of smoke, only 0:16:45.520 --> 0:16:49.800 to discover more smoke. Sophie's primary descriptive of Zambia is 0:16:49.800 --> 0:16:53.480 that it's quote dusty and basically just kind of hellish. 0:16:54.160 --> 0:16:57.880 Walking through the streets of shanty Zambian compounds does something 0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:03.280 to me. These compounds are lums, squalid, densely populated areas 0:17:03.320 --> 0:17:07.640 where poverty and disease are rampant. Whether I return home 0:17:07.680 --> 0:17:10.600 with mud between my toes because of the rains, with 0:17:10.760 --> 0:17:14.040 dust in every crevis during the dry season, or with 0:17:14.200 --> 0:17:17.240 soiled clothes because of a mixture of urine and diarrhea 0:17:17.359 --> 0:17:22.320 from all my little friends, something unexplainable happens. My heart 0:17:22.400 --> 0:17:25.240 is moved every time, and something in the depths of 0:17:25.280 --> 0:17:26.720 me yurins for Jesus. 0:17:28.000 --> 0:17:30.960 Because at the obfuscation of many of the exact locations, 0:17:31.160 --> 0:17:34.399 I can't say for sure whether Sophie really encountered this 0:17:34.560 --> 0:17:37.400 much dust, but certainly the whole country is not dusty. 0:17:37.840 --> 0:17:41.280 Zambia is a developing country, but to reduce the nation 0:17:41.520 --> 0:17:45.440 to scenes of crushing poverty and desperately maltreated children, as 0:17:45.480 --> 0:17:50.120 Sophie does in this book is unfair and inaccurate. Zambia 0:17:50.200 --> 0:17:53.480 is one of the most urbanized countries in Sub Saharan Africa. 0:17:54.119 --> 0:17:56.440 In two thousand and eight, when Sophie first arrived there, 0:17:56.760 --> 0:18:00.000 Zambia would have still been reeling from the global economic crisis, 0:18:00.400 --> 0:18:03.760 but they'd also undergone about a decade of economic growth 0:18:03.800 --> 0:18:08.280 and export diversification. Progress is being made in education, lowering 0:18:08.280 --> 0:18:12.000 maternal and child mortality rates and tackling the HIV AIDS epidemic. 0:18:12.720 --> 0:18:15.800 But there isn't much nuance to Sophie's descriptions of Zambia. 0:18:16.000 --> 0:18:19.000 The picture she paints is evocative of those Sally Struthers 0:18:19.040 --> 0:18:20.280 commercials from the nineties. 0:18:20.920 --> 0:18:23.359 For about seventy cents, you can buy a can of 0:18:23.400 --> 0:18:27.560 soda regular or diet. In Ethiopia, For just seventy cents 0:18:27.560 --> 0:18:31.400 a day, you can feed a child like Jamal nourishing meal. 0:18:31.840 --> 0:18:35.240 Since nineteen thirty eight, Christian Children's Fund has helped children 0:18:35.320 --> 0:18:39.680 of many faiths and their communities with food, medical care, clothing, 0:18:39.920 --> 0:18:42.359 a chance to go to school, or whatever is needed 0:18:42.400 --> 0:18:46.840 most Today, so many children around the world still need 0:18:46.880 --> 0:18:50.440 your help, and through Christian Children's Fund, you can reach 0:18:50.480 --> 0:18:53.399 out to one of them by sharing, well, just a 0:18:53.480 --> 0:18:55.080 little of your pocket change. 0:18:55.200 --> 0:18:56.840 It takes so little for you to. 0:18:56.840 --> 0:19:00.600 Become a special friend to a child in a developer country, 0:19:00.640 --> 0:19:03.320 but boy, the good it can do is worth more 0:19:03.400 --> 0:19:06.160 than you can imagine. 0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:10.199 So while there certainly is poverty in Zambia, much like 0:19:10.240 --> 0:19:15.200 in most places, Sophie's descriptions feel troubling. Now, it's hard 0:19:15.200 --> 0:19:17.399 to say on its face whether the problem here is 0:19:17.400 --> 0:19:19.359 that Sophie just needs to take a few more creative 0:19:19.359 --> 0:19:22.760 writing workshops, or if this is evidence of something deeper, 0:19:23.240 --> 0:19:25.399 but I just couldn't get over how the people she 0:19:25.480 --> 0:19:27.760 was with and the place she was in just never 0:19:27.840 --> 0:19:31.560 came into focus. Much more vivid than her descriptions of 0:19:31.600 --> 0:19:36.600 life in Zambia were Sophie's internal experiences, mostly talking to God. 0:19:37.280 --> 0:19:41.760 These were numerous and florid, occasionally veering into downright romantic 0:19:41.800 --> 0:19:42.920 passages like this one. 0:19:43.560 --> 0:19:46.119 You will find that I have loved you, Lord. I 0:19:46.119 --> 0:19:49.520 have loved you hard and with abandon. My eyes are 0:19:49.560 --> 0:19:53.800 on you, locked in I'm gazing. You will find me 0:19:53.920 --> 0:19:57.440 fully and holy in love with you. I will drink 0:19:57.480 --> 0:20:02.520 this cup, this double agony, this double grief, this searing pain, 0:20:03.160 --> 0:20:07.240 this deep anger, and this hatred of injustice because of them, 0:20:07.520 --> 0:20:10.040 and I will love you wholly as I drink this cup, 0:20:10.560 --> 0:20:20.800 sowing in tears, sowing in tears, sowing in tears. 0:20:20.840 --> 0:20:23.399 In her memoir and when she speaks to the media 0:20:23.440 --> 0:20:26.720 about her daughters, Sophie refers to the two young girls 0:20:26.720 --> 0:20:29.719 she brought home from Zambia as orphans. And there's an 0:20:29.720 --> 0:20:33.159 important cultural nuance here in the United States. When we 0:20:33.200 --> 0:20:36.160 say orphan, we usually take this to mean a child 0:20:36.200 --> 0:20:38.960 whose parents are dead. However, because of the differences in 0:20:39.040 --> 0:20:42.680 family structure, the word orphan has a pretty different context 0:20:42.760 --> 0:20:47.560 in Zambia. According to Zambian journalist Lori Machinhi, children become 0:20:47.680 --> 0:20:50.479 orphaned when they lose their parents, but parents are not 0:20:50.560 --> 0:20:54.040 seen as the only primary caregivers in a Zambian family. 0:20:54.440 --> 0:20:58.320 Zambians embrace the extended family system, so the adults that 0:20:58.359 --> 0:21:01.000 we would refer to as hans and uncles are also 0:21:01.080 --> 0:21:04.439 considered parental figures and often referred to as mom and 0:21:04.520 --> 0:21:09.040 dad as well, especially in traditional village settings. Similarly, cousins 0:21:09.080 --> 0:21:12.200 are referred to as sisters and brothers, etc. So when 0:21:12.200 --> 0:21:14.679 someone loses their parents and can't live on their own, 0:21:14.800 --> 0:21:17.879 the other adults in the family automatically take over custody 0:21:17.960 --> 0:21:21.439 of that quote orphan. In a few circumstances, where families 0:21:21.480 --> 0:21:24.520 are too poor or too abusive, the orphans will be 0:21:24.560 --> 0:21:27.320 taken to an orphanage where they will remain until they 0:21:27.320 --> 0:21:29.920 are able to be reunited with family, or, in cases 0:21:29.920 --> 0:21:32.479 where that's not possible, come of age and go out 0:21:32.520 --> 0:21:34.959 on their own. So while in the US we may 0:21:35.000 --> 0:21:37.840 think of an orphanage as a place where abandoned children 0:21:37.960 --> 0:21:41.439 await adoption. Orphanages in Zambia can serve as more of 0:21:41.440 --> 0:21:44.040 what we think of as a foster home for children. 0:21:44.400 --> 0:21:47.919 Because of the vagueness and frankly, the strangeness of Sophie's writing, 0:21:48.359 --> 0:21:50.320 it's hard to get a grasp on what she was 0:21:50.359 --> 0:21:53.040 doing day to day in Zambia prior to meeting and 0:21:53.119 --> 0:21:57.000 adopting her older daughter m Largely, it seems that she 0:21:57.119 --> 0:22:00.320 was in the business of saving souls. There's a lot 0:22:00.359 --> 0:22:03.320 of talk about saving women and children and being a 0:22:03.400 --> 0:22:07.080 quote mother to them, but the particulars aren't clear other 0:22:07.160 --> 0:22:11.440 than various mentions of proselytizing and Bible study, and occasional 0:22:11.480 --> 0:22:15.080 mentions of meetings with various healthcare providers. And Sophie doesn't 0:22:15.080 --> 0:22:19.159 appear to have any specialized training. However, as well demonstrated 0:22:19.160 --> 0:22:21.959 by the book, she sure does seem to know a 0:22:22.040 --> 0:22:26.000 lot of scripture. There's a lot about Jesus in this book. 0:22:26.280 --> 0:22:28.600 I would say at least the third of the text 0:22:28.920 --> 0:22:32.320