WEBVTT - Conversations About Statutory Rape 0:00:01.840 --> 0:00:04.360 Watch up and welcome back to another episode and No 0:00:04.519 --> 0:00:07.480 Sillers podcast with your host. Now funk that with your 0:00:07.560 --> 0:00:17.080 low glasses, Malone. So last time we were talking, I 0:00:17.120 --> 0:00:22.279 was telling you that I was saying that I felt like, well, 0:00:22.720 --> 0:00:27.440 minus my feelings, I don't think women right are I 0:00:27.480 --> 0:00:33.640 think statutory rape is a victimless crime, right, and it's 0:00:33.680 --> 0:00:37.479 not the same women aren't. Well, that's I guess that's 0:00:37.520 --> 0:00:40.080 the question. Are women really being taking advantage of I 0:00:40.080 --> 0:00:42.599 don't think they are. I think they're making the quality 0:00:42.680 --> 0:00:45.120 decisions at that age. I think men are violating the 0:00:45.200 --> 0:00:48.640 law right. So I think men that commits statutory rape 0:00:49.280 --> 0:00:52.479 is a bit you know, weird and ship and creepy. 0:00:52.520 --> 0:00:56.600 But I don't think women are as choiceless in the matter. 0:00:56.640 --> 0:01:01.720 I don't think it's even as much as they don't 0:01:01.720 --> 0:01:05.679 know what they want. You know, what does that makes sense? Like, 0:01:06.240 --> 0:01:08.880 because when women as they get older, they still kind 0:01:08.880 --> 0:01:12.560 of want the same exact thing they start I do, 0:01:12.760 --> 0:01:14.920 forgive me. So I do think there are situations where 0:01:14.959 --> 0:01:17.520 some women are getting took advantage of young girls, but 0:01:18.040 --> 0:01:20.480 I don't think that's the majority of the conversation when 0:01:20.520 --> 0:01:23.479 it comes think that's like rape and self just well, 0:01:23.520 --> 0:01:27.759 statutory rape is weird, right because it's called like if 0:01:27.840 --> 0:01:32.320 your parents are proven, it's not really a crime. So, 0:01:32.400 --> 0:01:35.199 like we're talking about R Kelly. R Kelly got charged 0:01:35.240 --> 0:01:38.320 on the Child Pornography Act, the Federal Child Pornography Act, 0:01:38.319 --> 0:01:41.640 where if you record somebody younger than six teams in 0:01:41.680 --> 0:01:47.160 the sexual Act, that's a Child Pornography Act um. More 0:01:47.200 --> 0:01:49.560 times than not, in the United States of America, there's 0:01:49.560 --> 0:01:53.200 more states that are sixteen. Is that's the legal age 0:01:53.200 --> 0:01:58.280 of consent that you can consent to sex independently. Some 0:01:58.360 --> 0:02:02.080 states a seventeen caliph on your rs as eighteen. So 0:02:02.880 --> 0:02:06.200 when you hear the turn statutory rate, it's really rooted 0:02:06.200 --> 0:02:08.720 in your parents. You don't have you're not of legal 0:02:08.760 --> 0:02:12.160 age to consent to have sex. At seventeen. You're not 0:02:12.280 --> 0:02:16.400 of legal age to consent to have sex. I mean 0:02:16.440 --> 0:02:19.880 you you can't legally consent to have sex. So if 0:02:19.919 --> 0:02:24.200 someone has sex with you again and you didn't you know, 0:02:24.680 --> 0:02:27.480 no matter if you said O care not for me, 0:02:27.639 --> 0:02:32.880 it could be considered statutory right, That's what I'm saying. No, 0:02:32.960 --> 0:02:37.360 don't smoke at all. You pa'ss that thing all the wever. 0:02:37.800 --> 0:02:43.240 So that's what I was saying. Well, R Kelly, So 0:02:43.280 --> 0:02:46.400 when we're talking about R. Kelly specifically, and you you're 0:02:46.440 --> 0:02:50.880 saying he them girls are victims, you know they're not. 0:02:52.240 --> 0:02:55.240 Because I was speaking as like, being fourteen years old, 0:02:55.880 --> 0:02:59.559 I don't think that you're you don't have that mentality 0:02:59.680 --> 0:03:03.120 or the adultnesship to make those type of decisions of 0:03:03.160 --> 0:03:04.959 what you really want. Shouldn't be up there. Yeah, you 0:03:04.960 --> 0:03:07.040 shouldn't be out at at fourteen. You should be focusing 0:03:07.080 --> 0:03:12.440 on school. Right, But I already knew that it's crazy. 0:03:12.720 --> 0:03:15.000 I know because I'll be reading so much. Right says 0:03:15.080 --> 0:03:18.400 that every every other state has the right, um, the 0:03:18.560 --> 0:03:21.400 limit is eighteen. But in the US, um, you just 0:03:21.880 --> 0:03:24.919 there's no limit if you have your parents consent or 0:03:24.960 --> 0:03:30.880 a judicial to a period. Because most parents wouldn't consent 0:03:30.919 --> 0:03:35.320 to that. Yes they do, even the women that are 0:03:36.080 --> 0:03:40.280 even the women like I feel like the parents that 0:03:40.400 --> 0:03:43.360 do give their children over their money hungry, and I 0:03:43.400 --> 0:03:47.040 feel like that's the old school. Like around my grandmother's age, 0:03:47.040 --> 0:03:49.360 I feel like they used to get their children up 0:03:49.640 --> 0:03:53.760 to older men for money reasons. I mean, I don't 0:03:53.760 --> 0:03:57.280 think they made money. I think genuinely that the world 0:03:57.360 --> 0:04:00.120 was you started faster, like I think our our are 0:04:00.240 --> 0:04:02.600 obviously of of you know, and I'm not a parent, 0:04:02.680 --> 0:04:05.360 so I can't really, but I think we definitely like 0:04:05.520 --> 0:04:08.640 to keep children younger today and then we're gonna talk 0:04:08.640 --> 0:04:11.680 shit about them being other countries, they do push you 0:04:11.720 --> 0:04:14.520 to grow up faster, you start working early, you start 0:04:14.560 --> 0:04:18.560 being an adult way because you already you know it's 0:04:18.600 --> 0:04:22.640 funked up, because right, it used to be women would 0:04:22.680 --> 0:04:25.920 have periods around thirteen four, two years old, all its 0:04:25.960 --> 0:04:31.080 hormones and food ship now girls, so that was literally 0:04:31.120 --> 0:04:36.520 the natural time of beginning womanhood. But obviously white folks 0:04:36.520 --> 0:04:39.520 start with the food ship ships happening way too fast. 0:04:40.120 --> 0:04:45.000 But there is a questionable desire, right that's going on 0:04:45.400 --> 0:04:48.040 right when you even let's say, like you were saying 0:04:48.040 --> 0:04:49.839 you were fourteen and some older guy was on you, 0:04:50.080 --> 0:04:54.680 right sure, which was just crazy as my age. What 0:04:54.760 --> 0:04:58.719 about the sex brothels where they're breeding children just so rich, 0:04:58.800 --> 0:05:03.479 disgusting man did have sex. I don't even know where 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:07.200 that's it. I know it's real, I'm not I'm not 0:05:07.240 --> 0:05:10.360 saying it's not real. It's obviously real, but I'm saying 0:05:10.880 --> 0:05:13.640 I don't want to get that far into that crazy ship. 0:05:13.720 --> 0:05:17.159 I feel like even without a law, without a cap, 0:05:17.400 --> 0:05:20.080 there is something in me nobody needs to tell me, 0:05:20.200 --> 0:05:22.039 just like how I feel like you already have God 0:05:22.080 --> 0:05:24.080 in you. You feel you know, it feels good, you 0:05:24.120 --> 0:05:26.480 know what's what feels wrong? Like I feel like, as 0:05:26.520 --> 0:05:30.360 a man, you should know that being thirty five years old, 0:05:30.400 --> 0:05:32.720 nobody has to tell you because to me, I feel 0:05:32.760 --> 0:05:34.960 like the law is already written for the white man. 0:05:35.120 --> 0:05:37.159 This is because they're into this type of perversion and 0:05:37.160 --> 0:05:39.240 ship like that. Like, I feel like you should know 0:05:39.320 --> 0:05:41.479 that if you're thirty five years old and you see 0:05:41.480 --> 0:05:44.880 at fourteen year old girl, why why does that attrack you? 0:05:44.920 --> 0:05:48.040 Like the law says okay or not? Shouldn't it already 0:05:48.080 --> 0:05:50.159 be like to you? Like, why why are you attracted 0:05:50.200 --> 0:05:53.240 to ye? The only thing you can drack from a 0:05:53.400 --> 0:05:59.760 child is to use them, abuse them and whole. But 0:05:59.800 --> 0:06:02.160 it's different, it's different. This is a child. He's only 0:06:04.320 --> 0:06:07.640 I'm not I'm not disagreeing, but again, you're you're asking 0:06:07.680 --> 0:06:11.119 a question to somebody that I cannot understand why somebody 0:06:11.120 --> 0:06:15.240 would date somebody eighteen right, But but we were talking 0:06:15.240 --> 0:06:19.279 about it last time, right in force some backup in 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:23.880 the spot Hill Joey west Side l A Giants of course, 0:06:23.920 --> 0:06:27.400 my co host Asia red Pete on Hiatus to Date, 0:06:28.480 --> 0:06:31.000 feel me no challenge the local um in the spot 0:06:31.279 --> 0:06:34.440 like that. What I'm saying is I agree with you 0:06:34.600 --> 0:06:38.400 in his mind. I think his mind is the mind 0:06:39.200 --> 0:06:44.320 that's messed up. The difference is when we're talking about 0:06:44.400 --> 0:06:48.280 a fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen year old woman's mind, 0:06:48.520 --> 0:06:51.440 I don't think their mind is messed up. That's the 0:06:51.480 --> 0:06:54.320 point I'm saying to you. They're making the same choice 0:06:54.640 --> 0:06:59.680 they will make. No, no, no, I get what you're saying, 0:06:59.720 --> 0:07:03.479 because us even at at you're still looking for that 0:07:03.560 --> 0:07:05.279 same exact thing that you were looking for when you 0:07:05.279 --> 0:07:08.080 were that age. Now the man the difference is what 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:11.240 I'm saying is your child, So you're just looking you 0:07:11.280 --> 0:07:14.000 know at your surroundings. Are people that you older women 0:07:14.000 --> 0:07:15.960 that you see you looking at them to trying to 0:07:16.000 --> 0:07:18.520 find your way. You don't really know yet. You're still 0:07:18.600 --> 0:07:20.960 learning this world, so you really don't know exactly what 0:07:20.960 --> 0:07:23.040 it is that you want. And if you have a 0:07:23.040 --> 0:07:26.560 parent or a guardian or someone that's looking over the 0:07:26.640 --> 0:07:28.880 right way, you wouldn't go in that direction, but that's 0:07:28.920 --> 0:07:32.040 not true or Kelly situation. That's my point. The parents 0:07:32.640 --> 0:07:37.440 literally okay, so let's let's be honest, right, yeah they 0:07:37.520 --> 0:07:39.880 were looking. Yeah it was not but like I said, 0:07:39.960 --> 0:07:44.520 some of them do that in other countries to their children. 0:07:45.480 --> 0:07:48.040 Right now, y'all looking at women, right, rid, you got 0:07:48.040 --> 0:07:51.200 a daughter, brid you got a daughter to right, you 0:07:51.240 --> 0:07:52.880 have a son, so you don't know, I mean you know, 0:07:52.960 --> 0:07:56.000 but yeah you got a daughter, don't have one? And 0:07:56.000 --> 0:07:58.400 if you did, would you allow you? This is not 0:07:58.440 --> 0:08:02.200 even this is not realistic. IM not saying it's okay. 0:08:03.000 --> 0:08:06.040 We're not talking about the man. I think men are 0:08:06.160 --> 0:08:11.400 messed up. I think men vicariously so men try to 0:08:11.480 --> 0:08:13.960 live through young women. That's how they feel like they're 0:08:13.960 --> 0:08:17.160 holding onto their youth. It's weird and creepy. It's not 0:08:17.200 --> 0:08:18.800 worth being young that much. I mean, I guess the 0:08:19.080 --> 0:08:22.360 thought of avoiding death is where they think it lies. 0:08:22.640 --> 0:08:25.640 Another way to do it though, but it's not actually 0:08:25.640 --> 0:08:27.680 going to work at all, And you really think about 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:32.439 you're not really holding it. Yeah, but it's not it's 0:08:32.480 --> 0:08:35.280 not it's not that it's it's it's all kind of 0:08:35.320 --> 0:08:43.520 like an are you saying that as females were so 0:08:43.720 --> 0:08:46.480 mature that we know at a young age what we want. 0:08:47.440 --> 0:08:50.199 I think you keep that's the point I'm saying the 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:55.720 government so like, like speaking for myself. When I was 0:08:56.320 --> 0:09:02.040 in middle age, in high school, teenage, yeah, I knew 0:09:02.080 --> 0:09:04.400 that I wanted an older guy because I knew I 0:09:04.440 --> 0:09:07.440 was going to be provided for. I didn't date guys 0:09:07.520 --> 0:09:12.240 my age. Yeah, and that's pretty much the truth. I 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:15.320 knew what I wanted at a young age. My sister 0:09:15.480 --> 0:09:19.400 told me. My sister told me. She said, the guys 0:09:19.640 --> 0:09:23.800 my age and the older guys want the exact same thing. 0:09:23.880 --> 0:09:26.000 The only difference is the older guys have a car 0:09:26.120 --> 0:09:30.000 and some money. And I'm not saying it's okay for 0:09:30.040 --> 0:09:32.920 the guy, like I'm not fighting against the law. The 0:09:33.040 --> 0:09:35.400 law is the law for a reason. I genuinely think 0:09:35.440 --> 0:09:40.559 women are gonna make bad decisions. They hold life as 0:09:40.600 --> 0:09:46.320 a child, and so as a child be years old, 0:09:46.480 --> 0:09:49.520 that was a bad decision. No, But I think that's 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:54.040 you the consistent decision you'll make. I think we wosponsibility. 0:09:54.160 --> 0:09:56.920 I wouldn't have made that to be my pregnant. He 0:09:56.960 --> 0:10:00.120 wouldn't have been like the kidnapper was coming up or 0:10:00.120 --> 0:10:04.040 a little kids with candy or somebody and the kid 0:10:04.120 --> 0:10:08.600 ain't exactly. But I don't I don't know if that's 0:10:08.640 --> 0:10:15.120 really exactly. I don't know if that's that's what you 0:10:15.200 --> 0:10:18.200 just said. That was a great analogy. Yeah, but you're 0:10:18.200 --> 0:10:22.400 gonna attract women with money their whole life. It's attractive. 0:10:23.440 --> 0:10:27.160 So like Sylvia at fourteen, Sylvia at twenty four, Sylvia 0:10:27.160 --> 0:10:29.240 at thirty four, Sylvia at forty four, is gonna always 0:10:29.240 --> 0:10:32.600 be attracted to money. Now at fourteen, did she know 0:10:32.679 --> 0:10:36.240 what really money looked like? No, all she knows is 0:10:36.320 --> 0:10:39.400 somebody to have more money than fourteen year old a girl, 0:10:39.520 --> 0:10:42.719 four to ye old girl. But she's still attracted to money. 0:10:42.880 --> 0:10:49.200 She's still attracted to, you know, finances we're not talking about. Yeah, 0:10:49.440 --> 0:10:52.840 exactly the situation that I was putting. Had I had 0:10:52.920 --> 0:10:56.439 a stable, I wouldn't have tried to find it in 0:10:56.520 --> 0:10:59.120 a older adult. Even right now, as in the dog, 0:10:59.200 --> 0:11:00.840 you still look for me to take care of you 0:11:01.040 --> 0:11:04.800 because I've already built my personality starting so young where 0:11:05.400 --> 0:11:08.280 it's already there. Say it right now, hopes to find 0:11:08.280 --> 0:11:12.160 a manner take care of her. I don't know. I want. 0:11:12.400 --> 0:11:15.479 My goals in life is to be very, very independent 0:11:15.520 --> 0:11:18.000 and not need anyone for ship. I don't want that's 0:11:18.160 --> 0:11:23.439 but that's not dating for a potential because I want 0:11:23.480 --> 0:11:25.240 to build somebody up and I just want to be 0:11:25.320 --> 0:11:27.680 built up and appreciate. It's not the fact that I 0:11:27.720 --> 0:11:31.040 need there that's It's not that I need someone to 0:11:31.080 --> 0:11:33.720 do this because before I even had someone, I've always 0:11:33.720 --> 0:11:36.760 been care of myself. I have my own apartment, like, 0:11:36.960 --> 0:11:39.280 so I don't need it. This is what I've been 0:11:39.320 --> 0:11:41.319 want because I definitely don't want to work a nine 0:11:41.520 --> 0:11:44.360 five and have a little bit of nothing and really 0:11:44.440 --> 0:11:48.280 getting by. Yeah, why not to do it? I don't. 0:11:48.480 --> 0:11:55.079 I'm not Again, these are finishing you complaints from each side. 0:11:57.360 --> 0:12:00.760 Of course, you want somebody to say you just home. Listen. 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:03.040 You just don't like the terminology because it makes you 0:12:03.080 --> 0:12:07.560 feel helpless. But it doesn't mean yes. But I know 0:12:07.640 --> 0:12:09.960 you like the terminology bothers you because it makes you 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:13.200 feel like you're helpless. That's not true. It really is somebody. 0:12:13.400 --> 0:12:15.720 You ought to think when somebody asked to marry you. 0:12:15.960 --> 0:12:17.760 For the most part, and I was explaining this to Joy, 0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:20.840 if you ask to marry somebody, you're pretty much asking 0:12:20.840 --> 0:12:22.400 a woman to let me take care of you for 0:12:22.440 --> 0:12:25.920 the rest of my life. I want to. But when 0:12:26.000 --> 0:12:31.320 they try to say but they just change me and 0:12:31.360 --> 0:12:33.319 tell me that this is right and this is wrong, 0:12:33.400 --> 0:12:35.240 like let me beat me, let me say what I 0:12:35.280 --> 0:12:40.800 want to say and do. There's no it's okay, go ahead. 0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:44.560 I'm listening to consider, like if what you're saying is 0:12:44.720 --> 0:12:49.120 right or wrong? And if do you tell your kids 0:12:49.120 --> 0:12:55.320 what to do? Not really like to a certain extent, 0:12:55.480 --> 0:12:58.120 because I don't want to crush her spirit, and like 0:12:58.240 --> 0:13:01.400 whatever she naturally has inside her, I want to magnify it. 0:13:01.480 --> 0:13:04.480 Like she's very confident right now, so I want to 0:13:04.559 --> 0:13:07.080 keep that. And why I feel like, why are you 0:13:07.160 --> 0:13:09.840 that way? Because I felt like I wasn't as confident 0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:11.840 as she is. You know, she looked at herself and 0:13:11.840 --> 0:13:13.560 she was like, oh, yes, you know. I don't want 0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:16.880 to kill that. But sometimes she she thinks she's too 0:13:16.960 --> 0:13:19.120 grown and she could do what I do, and I 0:13:19.160 --> 0:13:22.440 have to put her in her place. But why because 0:13:22.440 --> 0:13:25.800 she cannot do what I Why because she's a child. 0:13:25.880 --> 0:13:28.400 She literally can do everything you can do. I mean 0:13:28.640 --> 0:13:36.800 from that perspective, yes, of course, technically how she can 0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:40.240 do She's not even thinking about that that's not even drugs. Like, 0:13:40.800 --> 0:13:43.679 but but I'm saying to you, you know, the opportunity 0:13:44.000 --> 0:13:46.599 so obviously not a ten year old child, right, you 0:13:46.880 --> 0:13:48.959 shouldn't even be thinking about sick. You're not even but 0:13:49.400 --> 0:13:51.560 it's putting their face on all plas. Yeah, but that 0:13:51.559 --> 0:13:56.120 don't matter. Like once you start having administruations and puberty, 0:13:57.320 --> 0:14:00.800 the innate desire to procreate coming to play, Like even 0:14:00.840 --> 0:14:04.360 if you don't pay attention, you start feeling is weird. 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:09.040 That's why men start jagging off real Yeah, I just 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:13.320 I just brushed up against it. But that's my point. 0:14:13.360 --> 0:14:15.240 We were talking about that earlier when this has happened, 0:14:15.240 --> 0:14:17.760 that the food is sucking shut up, and it's forcing 0:14:17.800 --> 0:14:20.280 it earlier. So I'm not I'm not necessarily referring to 0:14:20.320 --> 0:14:23.040 that seven years old you're like fully develop walking around 0:14:23.080 --> 0:14:31.040 here with assent titties. It's the hormones that yeah, the kids. 0:14:31.640 --> 0:14:34.640 So no, what I'm saying on that level is I 0:14:34.680 --> 0:14:37.520 think you make this so now is it shouldn't be 0:14:37.520 --> 0:14:39.880 against the law. Yes, you know, I think men at 0:14:39.920 --> 0:14:45.880 a certain place, Um, I don't have to have a 0:14:45.960 --> 0:14:48.480 kid to not agree with that law. I mean, like 0:14:48.720 --> 0:14:50.120 like I don't have to have a kid to agree 0:14:50.160 --> 0:14:52.040 with the law. I understand the concept of the law 0:14:52.320 --> 0:14:54.400 as a man thirty five years old is looking at 0:14:54.400 --> 0:14:57.480 somebody for a team, no matter how developed she is. 0:14:58.000 --> 0:15:00.920 Soon she started talking to realize she's sucking for Yeah, exactly. 0:15:00.920 --> 0:15:04.320 I don't care about them. But again, something inside of 0:15:04.320 --> 0:15:07.680 a man that's thirty five, if you're okay with that. 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:10.680 And there's some men who really love women at fourteen. Yes, 0:15:11.000 --> 0:15:13.360 I don't know what I used to Guys used to 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:17.120 sit outside of my junior high school in their cars 0:15:17.280 --> 0:15:19.560 waiting on us to get out of school. And they 0:15:19.600 --> 0:15:22.920 were all adults. So that's just weird, right, And and 0:15:22.960 --> 0:15:25.480 I know guys like that, But I think what I've 0:15:25.520 --> 0:15:28.560 got from those older dudes that I remember they were 0:15:28.600 --> 0:15:31.040 trying to live like, So I think this is what 0:15:31.160 --> 0:15:33.880 I think I could be being judgmental. Forgive me to 0:15:33.960 --> 0:15:36.280 all the dudes out there that's doing this, even though 0:15:36.320 --> 0:15:38.640 you're a little weird. Though I'm not trying to judge you, 0:15:39.240 --> 0:15:42.840 but I genuinely think your penis is small, right, So 0:15:42.920 --> 0:15:45.120 you're like you're trying to get something fresh or something 0:15:45.160 --> 0:15:59.600 I don't like understand why, Yes, they control the older ones, Yes, 0:16:00.000 --> 0:16:02.680 work when you deal with a older what you want 0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:05.720 to get baby? Right? So you have you ever heard 0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:08.560 a woman you can control? Joey, But it's not if 0:16:08.600 --> 0:16:11.320 you wanted to manipulate every woman all the time. Have 0:16:11.400 --> 0:16:13.880 you can no manipulate every last woman that's been in 0:16:13.920 --> 0:16:17.120 your life if you wanted to truly manipulate them and controlled. Yes, 0:16:17.440 --> 0:16:21.360 if it's just listen, if it's no whole bar, so 0:16:21.440 --> 0:16:25.200 you have no conscious idea of worrying about what you're doing. 0:16:25.560 --> 0:16:28.360 Every woman can be controlled by me, not every woman. 0:16:31.520 --> 0:16:36.040 I've never been tamed in my life. But that's that's 0:16:36.080 --> 0:16:38.520 the point, right, And I got you early. So now 0:16:38.560 --> 0:16:41.040 you feel like you you don't want to be you 0:16:41.040 --> 0:16:44.040 you I will not, I will not. But that's again 0:16:44.120 --> 0:16:46.480 that's because every woman, but that only you're not being 0:16:46.560 --> 0:16:51.480 tamed now, how you think in your mind and not 0:16:51.600 --> 0:16:54.200 in my mind? I know for sure? Yes, huh? I 0:16:54.240 --> 0:16:58.480 think you know you can't because if somebody can manipulate you, 0:16:58.480 --> 0:17:02.360 you're being Yeah, she's been manipulated multiple time. Yeah, as 0:17:02.400 --> 0:17:05.160 a kid is younger, you can't do it now. Yeah, 0:17:05.160 --> 0:17:07.359 but that's different because now you're not. Now you won't 0:17:07.359 --> 0:17:09.440 even let love happen because at the some place you 0:17:09.440 --> 0:17:13.159 think somebody always trying to manipulae. So then that's not 0:17:13.200 --> 0:17:15.760 the same. You just traumatize. You're not telling whatever it is, 0:17:15.840 --> 0:17:20.800 I cannot be you tell me yourself like you tell 0:17:20.880 --> 0:17:23.400 me yourself. You're like, I'll show this nig nigga, Like, damn, 0:17:23.520 --> 0:17:25.720 I'm just trying to marry you. That nigga. You think 0:17:25.720 --> 0:17:28.960 you nigga trying to take advantage of me. Ni what 0:17:29.080 --> 0:17:32.359 you think you're gonna be opening my door? You think 0:17:32.359 --> 0:17:34.560 you will be opening my door for me forever. Nigga, Me, 0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:37.359 that ain't gonna change. Ye're gonna change ship. You'll marry 0:17:37.359 --> 0:17:38.480 me and put me in the house. Who do you 0:17:38.520 --> 0:17:42.480 think you're playing with? Nigga, I'm gonna listen to you. 0:17:44.280 --> 0:17:45.760 You mean to tell me, nigga, you're gonna take out 0:17:45.760 --> 0:17:49.680 the trash heavy week? Do you think you slick? He's 0:17:49.720 --> 0:17:53.719 like himself out the trash. They meet me and it's 0:17:53.760 --> 0:17:57.679 a motherfucker man, he said lovely when he gets to us, 0:17:57.840 --> 0:17:59.879 I get I like, yeah, but that's but that's what 0:18:00.000 --> 0:18:02.680 does You went through something? Yea so so so then 0:18:02.720 --> 0:18:06.920 you actually making me you're making me reconsider my thought 0:18:07.160 --> 0:18:09.600 because at a certain place. If it harms you, then 0:18:09.640 --> 0:18:12.360 you do become a victim. So if you're harmed by 0:18:12.359 --> 0:18:14.720 what happened with you choosing that, you know the older 0:18:14.720 --> 0:18:18.399 guy right with your fourteen year old brain, and it 0:18:18.400 --> 0:18:21.040 it's harmed you, right, because that's what you're saying, it's harmed. 0:18:21.080 --> 0:18:24.200 You didn't there is a victim. Most fourteen year olds 0:18:24.200 --> 0:18:27.320 are harmed, That's what I'm saying. So I didn't know 0:18:27.400 --> 0:18:29.639 you was harmed. So that's dope to find out. That's 0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:31.600 that's a really good thing, you know. That's the that's 0:18:31.640 --> 0:18:34.760 the trauma. That's something. Trauma is something that will make 0:18:34.800 --> 0:18:37.040 you have your guards up. Of course, you know what 0:18:37.040 --> 0:18:41.000 I'm saying. That's crazy. So but do you like so 0:18:41.200 --> 0:18:44.880 do you only like today older men? Now? No? Because God, 0:18:44.880 --> 0:18:47.600 she's been Dave forever and it's like, okay, and I 0:18:47.680 --> 0:18:49.440 met him in junior high school. She won't let that 0:18:49.520 --> 0:18:51.800 nigga love him. You think you're sticking you borm me 0:18:51.840 --> 0:18:56.679 these flowers, nothing gonna happen. Yeah, okay, So he's like 0:18:56.840 --> 0:18:58.680 he always telled me, like when you get too close 0:18:58.760 --> 0:19:00.600 or get to love you, w I kind pull away 0:19:00.680 --> 0:19:02.800 And like why you just won't let me love you 0:19:02.880 --> 0:19:06.040 like you can't love me, weird like kind of like. 0:19:07.920 --> 0:19:10.320 And I've been with him for years, I lived together. 0:19:10.520 --> 0:19:13.439 It's like, but when it's too like, it's just I 0:19:13.440 --> 0:19:15.920 don't know inside, I just get real uncomfortable and I'll 0:19:16.000 --> 0:19:19.440 go to the I gotta go do this. You know 0:19:19.560 --> 0:19:23.399 what's funny is that's crazy. Van. He's dealt with it. 0:19:23.680 --> 0:19:27.359 Van and Charlotte Maagne you like Dave and I'll be 0:19:27.400 --> 0:19:30.560 on it. But you need a therapist. I've had plenty. 0:19:30.720 --> 0:19:34.399 You need more because it's not a bad thing because 0:19:34.720 --> 0:19:36.440 it's not it's not a but it's not a bad 0:19:36.480 --> 0:19:39.160 it's not it's not what it means because there's unresolved 0:19:39.240 --> 0:19:44.800 things up. There's unresolved things. I'm telling you you you 0:19:44.880 --> 0:19:47.359 really I've had you know what it is. And maybe 0:19:47.359 --> 0:19:50.200 if I had a therapist that was black and no, yeah, 0:19:50.200 --> 0:19:52.240 I got to be a real thing. Of them has 0:19:52.280 --> 0:19:54.760 been like white. So I'm like, you can't possibly understand. 0:19:55.800 --> 0:19:57.840 You don't even let the therapist. Do you think you shouldn't? 0:19:57.920 --> 0:20:00.320 You're trying to fix my problems, not like that. But 0:20:00.359 --> 0:20:03.720 if you're if you're racist, you just assume I talked 0:20:03.760 --> 0:20:05.760 to older men because I was younger. There's nowhere a 0:20:05.800 --> 0:20:08.640 white person can teach me or tell me anything because 0:20:08.640 --> 0:20:11.000 you're not coming from how you're thinking. You're just going 0:20:11.040 --> 0:20:13.399 by the book, so you don't understand my life. So 0:20:13.440 --> 0:20:15.800 you can't tell that's a black person. I could take 0:20:15.840 --> 0:20:20.520 it from someone who it's like, ah, I feel like 0:20:20.640 --> 0:20:23.080 they can talk to another addict because they've been there 0:20:23.119 --> 0:20:24.840 and they sure you know what I mean. But someone 0:20:24.880 --> 0:20:27.080 who's never you don't you never even experienced. No, I 0:20:27.119 --> 0:20:30.239 respect if you if you respect experience, I get it, 0:20:30.320 --> 0:20:32.800 and that's important. So no, so so you do you 0:20:32.920 --> 0:20:38.760 might need that because like, yeah, you yeah, it's tough. 0:20:38.880 --> 0:20:41.359 That's tough. I never that's funny. That sucked me up. 0:20:41.400 --> 0:20:43.760 That literally sucked me up because I never realized that 0:20:44.119 --> 0:20:47.080 if it harms you, it's different because I don't think 0:20:47.119 --> 0:20:49.040 the girls I knew maybe they are harmed, and I 0:20:49.080 --> 0:20:52.080 didn't know they was harmed because they just keep going 0:20:52.119 --> 0:20:54.160 on with life. And I'm like, because you gotta remember, 0:20:54.240 --> 0:20:56.320 like we're in high school. This girl's fift c t R. 0:20:56.359 --> 0:20:58.480 Agent that ain't giving us no play. That's talking to 0:20:58.520 --> 0:21:02.280 the dudes with the carrs, that McDonald's value the car 0:21:02.440 --> 0:21:04.280 they valued the card to do with the money, and 0:21:04.320 --> 0:21:06.240 I'm like, I always thought it was weird because I'm like, 0:21:06.720 --> 0:21:09.600 if I was twenty four, I had a low rider 0:21:09.600 --> 0:21:12.040 and some money. The last place I was looking for 0:21:12.080 --> 0:21:15.600 broads is at high school. And I don't think we 0:21:15.960 --> 0:21:19.000 value the car. I think it's the maturity level of 0:21:19.119 --> 0:21:30.840 the older guy and like him taking care of you. 0:21:31.080 --> 0:21:34.720 That's what I though he's using because but it's not 0:21:34.760 --> 0:21:37.960 even just the static. It represents what he's doing. What 0:21:37.960 --> 0:21:40.640 would she see? I understand, no, but but it's literally 0:21:40.680 --> 0:21:43.760 you also get somewhere with less sweat and work, so's 0:21:43.800 --> 0:21:46.160 there's a reality to it, and that's what I guess 0:21:46.160 --> 0:21:47.960 I was talking. I don't even think it's necessarily about 0:21:47.960 --> 0:21:49.760 the work. It's just you're already in a position to 0:21:49.840 --> 0:21:52.639 where you don't have much, you know, Like well, for me, 0:21:52.720 --> 0:21:55.119 let me speak for me. Let's being in a group 0:21:55.160 --> 0:21:57.280 home and going from foster care to foster care. I 0:21:57.280 --> 0:21:59.639 don't have my mom and have my dad, and I 0:21:59.680 --> 0:22:01.840 don't have nothing, you know, And then you see all 0:22:01.880 --> 0:22:04.080 these other people, you know, they got to their parents 0:22:04.080 --> 0:22:06.159 to take care of them, and you you're without, So 0:22:06.240 --> 0:22:09.040 then you start looking okay, well I need to get 0:22:09.119 --> 0:22:11.359 older man like that hasn't because I want to be 0:22:11.720 --> 0:22:14.080 you know, comfortable in my life too, because right now 0:22:14.080 --> 0:22:17.239 I'm not comfortable. So you start looking for stuff like 0:22:17.320 --> 0:22:19.719 outside of like at school, like I don't want these 0:22:19.720 --> 0:22:22.479 guys who don't have anything you can't take. Yeah, they 0:22:22.480 --> 0:22:24.879 can't take me nowhere, they can't buy me something, and 0:22:24.920 --> 0:22:27.080 I'm over, I'm walking around with holes in my shoes 0:22:27.160 --> 0:22:29.719 or look at dragon. Did you notice that it was 0:22:30.720 --> 0:22:33.760 older man attracted to you? Just that one like it 0:22:33.800 --> 0:22:36.480 was like, oh it was many. So you saying that 0:22:36.520 --> 0:22:39.080 I dated. I'm just saying even when I would tell 0:22:39.200 --> 0:22:41.960