WEBVTT - How to Really, Truly Keep Your Workplace Resolutions 0:00:00.520 --> 0:00:04.720 New Year, New workplace. You right, Every year we come 0:00:04.880 --> 0:00:07.000 back from the holidays and say we're going to be 0:00:07.200 --> 0:00:10.719 our best selves and we make our workplace resolution. This 0:00:10.760 --> 0:00:13.440 week we're going to talk about how to stick to them. 0:00:13.480 --> 0:00:28.360 This is game plan. Welcome back. I'm Rebecca Greenfield and 0:00:28.440 --> 0:00:31.600 I am Sam Grobart, and this week we're talking about 0:00:31.600 --> 0:00:35.960 our workplace New Year's resolutions, because of course if it's January. Yeah, 0:00:36.000 --> 0:00:38.320 we gotta be better than last year. Oh. I know 0:00:38.400 --> 0:00:40.320 it's going to be hard because you were so good 0:00:40.400 --> 0:00:43.600 last year. I set the bar so high. I set 0:00:43.640 --> 0:00:46.720 goals and I achieved them. Because goals are hard to attain. 0:00:46.880 --> 0:00:49.080 That's why goals are hard to attain. I feel like 0:00:49.479 --> 0:00:53.840 seventeen is already proving itself to be formidable. Yes, but 0:00:54.000 --> 0:00:56.680 that has not stopped us from making resolutions that you 0:00:56.840 --> 0:00:58.800 probably won't keep, but you know, we'll try for a 0:00:58.840 --> 0:01:01.959 little while. Yeah. So, Sam, do you have a workplace 0:01:02.040 --> 0:01:05.199 near est resolution? Well? I do. I actually have two, 0:01:05.840 --> 0:01:08.479 and I think one is more workplace related than the other. 0:01:08.520 --> 0:01:11.960 I'll start with the workplace one. I have never kept 0:01:12.000 --> 0:01:14.600 any sort of a to do list. I have this 0:01:14.880 --> 0:01:17.160 misbegotten notion that I can just keep it all in 0:01:17.200 --> 0:01:22.080 my head, and as I become older and feebler brained, 0:01:22.480 --> 0:01:25.000 I think that it would be beneficial for me to 0:01:25.120 --> 0:01:27.680 keep a to do list every day and refer to 0:01:27.760 --> 0:01:31.280 it constantly. So I did a little googling on to 0:01:31.440 --> 0:01:34.080 do lists. Did you know? Yeah, And there's so much 0:01:34.120 --> 0:01:37.880 competing advice out there. There's like, don't write the to 0:01:37.959 --> 0:01:40.160 do list, you need a to do list, You're doing 0:01:40.200 --> 0:01:42.959 your to do list wrong. One stat I found that 0:01:43.000 --> 0:01:46.120 said nearly two thirds of professionals right to do lists, 0:01:46.480 --> 0:01:50.040 but only of them do the tasks on them. Which 0:01:50.080 --> 0:01:52.280 that's kind of my m O. Like I write down 0:01:52.320 --> 0:01:55.000 all the things and then just the next day rewrite 0:01:55.000 --> 0:01:57.600 down all the things. I'm always seeking a new piece 0:01:57.640 --> 0:02:00.280 of technology to make my life better. Think that that 0:02:00.320 --> 0:02:03.559 will be the miracle cure didn't be j Novac of 0:02:03.760 --> 0:02:09.440 the Office fame. He did, he did. I'm not using 0:02:10.040 --> 0:02:14.480 his appre you using. I have recently switched over calendar apps. 0:02:14.720 --> 0:02:17.280 So I was a long time Apple calendar user with 0:02:17.360 --> 0:02:20.519 a sort of Google Calendar back end. Don't mean to 0:02:20.560 --> 0:02:23.239 get to in the weeds here, people, but I have 0:02:23.320 --> 0:02:26.480 switched over to a new calendar app called Fantastical. Two 0:02:27.480 --> 0:02:32.120 um the sequel, so many unanswered questions from Fantastical one 0:02:32.400 --> 0:02:35.519 and it's four So I don't pay for apps, no, 0:02:35.720 --> 0:02:37.760 So of course the psychology for me is like it's 0:02:37.760 --> 0:02:41.440 got to be amazing, right, such quality. The one thing 0:02:41.480 --> 0:02:43.359 I do like about it very much, which you think 0:02:43.400 --> 0:02:45.840 would appear in other calendar apps, is that you are 0:02:45.840 --> 0:02:49.840 able to view your tasks and your appointments in the 0:02:49.960 --> 0:02:54.320 same thing. There's no separate app for the one versus 0:02:54.360 --> 0:02:56.480 the other. And that way, when I'm looking at my day, 0:02:56.840 --> 0:02:59.320 I can sort of see everything that's going on, things 0:02:59.320 --> 0:03:01.120 I have to do which could happen like sort of 0:03:01.160 --> 0:03:03.440 in the morning or the afternoon, as well as obviously 0:03:03.840 --> 0:03:05.760 meetings and phone calls and things like that that are 0:03:05.760 --> 0:03:08.240 going to happen at a scheduled time. That seems useful 0:03:08.280 --> 0:03:12.680 because I just make reminders appointments right now, I'll just 0:03:12.720 --> 0:03:17.239 make them appointments, right The problem I have with that strategy, 0:03:17.280 --> 0:03:19.360 which is what I used to do, two things. First 0:03:19.360 --> 0:03:21.440 of all, you get an alert at a certain time 0:03:21.680 --> 0:03:23.960 and it's annoying and never at the right time, never 0:03:24.000 --> 0:03:25.680 the right time, and then you ignore it and it 0:03:25.720 --> 0:03:28.120 goes away. It's bad, and then you're it's sitting in 0:03:28.120 --> 0:03:32.200 another app that you're probably not going to go look at, whereas, 0:03:32.240 --> 0:03:34.480 of course your calendar. I mean, my calendar is up 0:03:34.480 --> 0:03:36.960 on my screen and stuff all the time, constantly looking 0:03:36.960 --> 0:03:40.080 at my calendar. I'm so busy. I know, I know 0:03:40.880 --> 0:03:43.440 that you make the time for this. So that's one 0:03:43.440 --> 0:03:45.920 thing that I'm trying to the other one is more 0:03:46.000 --> 0:03:48.480 of a health related one, but I think it has 0:03:48.520 --> 0:03:51.720 some ramifications in the workplace. I am going to try 0:03:51.760 --> 0:03:54.920 to drink less, and by drink, I mean alcohol, not 0:03:55.120 --> 0:03:57.400 fluids in general, not that I feel like it's ever 0:03:57.440 --> 0:04:00.800 been a problem, nothing like that. But I'm getting chubby. 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:04.400 I mean I've never been super skinny, but like I 0:04:04.440 --> 0:04:06.240 got on the scale like a week ago and I 0:04:06.280 --> 0:04:08.520 was like, oh my god. Yeah, it seems like an 0:04:08.520 --> 0:04:11.440 easy thing to cut out. Yeah, So I'm saying I 0:04:11.480 --> 0:04:16.360 am not going to drink from Sunday through Thursday. I 0:04:16.400 --> 0:04:19.760 will drink on the weekend, which does seem workplace related, 0:04:19.800 --> 0:04:22.560 because there's a lot of workplace happy hours totally, and 0:04:22.960 --> 0:04:24.920 drinks with like a person that you might be doing 0:04:24.960 --> 0:04:28.440 business with or talking to or something like that. Or 0:04:28.480 --> 0:04:30.440 I had a really long day and I just want 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:35.080 a beer after work, right, So, yes, I'm wondering what's 0:04:35.080 --> 0:04:38.400 going to happen when I have a work related drinking event. 0:04:38.520 --> 0:04:41.640 I'm not necessarily saying that I'm not going to drink then. 0:04:42.240 --> 0:04:44.760 I think, like a cocktail is not going to make 0:04:44.839 --> 0:04:49.080 or break my pattern, although maybe I'll just get a 0:04:49.080 --> 0:04:51.159 saltzer with lime. You're going to have to be that 0:04:51.200 --> 0:04:55.560 guy like, oh, I actually don't drink on Mondays. Yeah, 0:04:55.600 --> 0:04:58.880 I know. I want to hear your resolutions, so mine 0:04:58.880 --> 0:05:01.640 aren't kind of relate aided to each other. My first 0:05:01.680 --> 0:05:04.880 one is that I would like to spend less frivolous 0:05:05.040 --> 0:05:08.479 time on Twitter. Excellent. Yeah, we have to use Twitter 0:05:08.520 --> 0:05:11.120 a lot for our jobs. But I've developed what I 0:05:11.160 --> 0:05:14.800 think is an unhealthy addiction. Like sometimes my fingers will 0:05:14.839 --> 0:05:20.120 type t W into the into the browser automatically, and 0:05:20.160 --> 0:05:21.719 then I'll go there and then I'll close it and 0:05:21.720 --> 0:05:24.840 then I'll reopen it literally one second later. It's bad, 0:05:24.960 --> 0:05:27.080 and then the news comes at me really quickly, and 0:05:27.120 --> 0:05:30.720 it's stressful, and the news stresses me out. And I 0:05:30.720 --> 0:05:32.880 am in the news business and I have to stay informed. 0:05:32.920 --> 0:05:36.680 But I don't think as much as I am doing now, 0:05:37.000 --> 0:05:39.440 I am going to say that you are correct. Well, 0:05:39.480 --> 0:05:43.000 I did download this app stay Focused, which lets you 0:05:43.040 --> 0:05:44.960 set a timer for how long you're allowed to use 0:05:45.000 --> 0:05:47.920 a website in a given day. But I've already figured 0:05:47.960 --> 0:05:51.640 out a work around. It's so bad, I'm so addicted. 0:05:51.680 --> 0:05:54.000 I need help. So that's that's my first resolution, and 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:57.520 the other one is related in that I would like 0:05:57.600 --> 0:06:01.000 to be better at staying focused on one specific given 0:06:01.080 --> 0:06:04.440 task at work. I sometimes will be writing a story 0:06:04.440 --> 0:06:06.400 and it will take me twice or three times as 0:06:06.440 --> 0:06:09.400 long because I get distracted by things like Twitter, but 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:13.720 other things too that I just can't focus. I mean, 0:06:13.760 --> 0:06:16.080 I think many people, most people are probably that way. 0:06:16.120 --> 0:06:17.960 I am certainly that way. Do you ever find yourself 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:21.960 engaging in what I like to call constructive procrastination? Yeah? Yeah, Like, oh, 0:06:21.960 --> 0:06:24.120 I'm going to do my expense report. I mean I've 0:06:24.120 --> 0:06:26.000 got to do it eventually, right, I mean, it needs 0:06:26.040 --> 0:06:28.719 to get done. I just did that today, just this morning. 0:06:29.080 --> 0:06:32.240 Things like that. So I think maybe these are lofty 0:06:32.400 --> 0:06:35.880 goals that are hard to achieve. I have cleaned grout 0:06:35.880 --> 0:06:40.360 work in my shower so as to avoid doing other things. Yeah, 0:06:40.400 --> 0:06:42.880 my old roommate used to clean the entire apartment when 0:06:42.920 --> 0:06:44.640 she worked from home. I could always tell when she 0:06:44.720 --> 0:06:46.880 was working from home because the apartment would be really clean. 0:06:46.960 --> 0:06:50.440 So yeah, there are various ways to stick to these habits. 0:06:50.480 --> 0:06:55.040 Just today on Twitter, I saw many links tweeted about 0:06:55.040 --> 0:06:57.560 how to stick to your New Year's resolutions. And one 0:06:57.600 --> 0:07:01.360 way that I came across is this website stick. It's 0:07:01.400 --> 0:07:04.320 spelled s t I C K k oh of course, 0:07:04.400 --> 0:07:08.039 of course, and it was started by these Yale behavioral 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:13.000 economists and basically you bet against yourself, so it's pretty extreme. So, 0:07:13.600 --> 0:07:17.040 say you want to stop drinking, you put up something 0:07:17.080 --> 0:07:20.800 like a hundred dollars a week, and if you drink 0:07:20.840 --> 0:07:23.360 that week, you have to pay the website one hundred dollars, 0:07:24.120 --> 0:07:27.200 and that one hundred dollars goes to an anti charity. 0:07:27.280 --> 0:07:31.960 So say you are pro gun control, they would send 0:07:31.960 --> 0:07:35.080 the money to the n r A and they say 0:07:35.120 --> 0:07:40.120 it really works. And you can also point a referee, 0:07:40.160 --> 0:07:43.200 so a friend, to keep you honest. Oh so if 0:07:43.240 --> 0:07:46.200 your self reporting is not reliable, like I didn't drink, 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:49.320 privileges can be granted to another person who can actually 0:07:49.320 --> 0:07:51.720 wrap you out and then that money goes to like 0:07:51.800 --> 0:07:55.000 the Family Research Council. Yeah, or or whatever your anti 0:07:55.080 --> 0:07:57.640 charity is. I mean, I'm kind of scared of that. 0:07:57.760 --> 0:08:01.080 It's scary. It's a cool idea, but it's it's But 0:08:01.360 --> 0:08:04.120 since we're not going to do that, we are going 0:08:04.160 --> 0:08:07.679 to talk to Gretchen Rubin of the Happiness Project fame, 0:08:07.720 --> 0:08:10.040 and she has another book, Better Than Before, that is 0:08:10.080 --> 0:08:20.760 all about breaking habits. Thanks so much for joining us today. 0:08:20.920 --> 0:08:23.240 I'm very happy to be talking to you. So we 0:08:23.360 --> 0:08:26.760 just went through our workplace resolutions, Sam and I and 0:08:27.000 --> 0:08:29.320 we want to know how to stick to them. Excellent, 0:08:29.360 --> 0:08:32.040 only my favorite subject. Excellent. So I guess we should 0:08:32.040 --> 0:08:34.520 start with Sam's first. Yeah, tell me what I need 0:08:34.559 --> 0:08:37.520 to do to make these things stick. Okay, one of 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:39.880 your resolutions is to drink less, not to give up 0:08:39.920 --> 0:08:46.920 drinking altogether, but right, right, right, And that's a surprisingly 0:08:46.920 --> 0:08:49.520 common resolution. I think you're really smart to kind of 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:51.520 have a bright line rule, because what you want to 0:08:51.559 --> 0:08:53.800 do with resolutions and with habit making generally, is to 0:08:53.800 --> 0:08:56.640 get out of decisions because every time you try to 0:08:56.640 --> 0:08:58.840 make a healthy choice, you have the opportunity to make 0:08:58.880 --> 0:09:01.360 the wrong choice. So if you're saying there's this block 0:09:01.400 --> 0:09:03.079 of time where I'm just not going to have a drink, 0:09:03.440 --> 0:09:06.760 then there's no debate, right, right, So you're you've said that, 0:09:06.800 --> 0:09:09.400 and then you're planning for when you would that's right, yeah, 0:09:09.480 --> 0:09:12.360 and really looking forward to it and really okay. So 0:09:12.440 --> 0:09:14.800 but then the question you and you were very smart 0:09:14.880 --> 0:09:17.040 in thinking about. But they're going to be these things 0:09:17.040 --> 0:09:18.599 that come up. And that's what I would call the 0:09:18.640 --> 0:09:23.160 strategy of safeguards, which is planning for failure. Right. I mean, 0:09:23.200 --> 0:09:25.480 if I'm out at work and then somebody says, sorry, 0:09:25.559 --> 0:09:28.040 let's get a drink. Yes, I'm not sure what to do. 0:09:28.080 --> 0:09:29.719 But you didn't have a plan. Really, you didn't know 0:09:30.080 --> 0:09:32.640 you needed one, So you need if then plan if 0:09:32.679 --> 0:09:36.120 this happens, then this happens. Now what are the challenges 0:09:36.160 --> 0:09:38.440 that arise? Is it a friend asking for drink? Is 0:09:38.440 --> 0:09:40.600 it a business dinner where everybody is sharing a glass 0:09:40.600 --> 0:09:42.560 of wine? Like, what is the challenge that you face? 0:09:42.760 --> 0:09:45.720 I think that for me, the more likely scenario is 0:09:45.880 --> 0:09:50.280 a social occasion which might have some work related benefit. 0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:53.160 So here you go and you sit down somewhere and 0:09:53.280 --> 0:09:56.640 the person orders a drink and I say, oh, I'm 0:09:56.679 --> 0:09:59.320 actually trying to drink less now, which then feels like 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:03.560 maybe I'm judge in them, which maybe makes them feel uncomfortable. Also, 0:10:03.679 --> 0:10:06.559 can I butt in, having a drink in these situations 0:10:06.679 --> 0:10:12.000 makes them easier and loosens everybody up. Okay, So in 0:10:12.040 --> 0:10:13.640 my book Better Than Before, I talk about the twenty 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:15.480 one strategies of habit change, and these are the twenty 0:10:15.480 --> 0:10:17.200 one strategies that you can use to make or break 0:10:17.200 --> 0:10:18.880 your habits. And you're kind of rolling your eyes because 0:10:18.960 --> 0:10:21.840 twenty one sounds like a lot, I know, but it's 0:10:21.840 --> 0:10:24.200 good because some work for some people, enough for others, 0:10:24.200 --> 0:10:26.240 and some in some situations enough brothers. And I think 0:10:26.280 --> 0:10:29.760 what you need, first of all is clarity, because what 0:10:29.960 --> 0:10:31.600 is the purpose of your rule? And so when are 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:33.280 you going to invoke it? Because you could have a 0:10:33.320 --> 0:10:36.319 specific exception for certain kinds of occasions. You could say 0:10:36.320 --> 0:10:38.520 to yourself, I'm only going to drink on Friday and 0:10:38.559 --> 0:10:40.880 Saturday nights, except if I'm at a work event where 0:10:40.880 --> 0:10:44.000 I feel like having one drink would make me feel 0:10:44.040 --> 0:10:47.200 significantly more comfortable in this situation, and then you're sort 0:10:47.200 --> 0:10:49.959 of you have a planned exception. You're gonna have one 0:10:50.040 --> 0:10:53.000 drink because wondering to address the concerns that you're having 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:55.679 one drink is enough or you could just say I'm 0:10:55.679 --> 0:10:57.760 going to have a diet coke, but it is easier. 0:10:57.840 --> 0:11:01.079 The more clear a rule is, like, no drinks except 0:11:01.120 --> 0:11:03.320 for Friday and Saturday is clear than no drinks except 0:11:03.360 --> 0:11:06.440 Friday and Saturday except for these exceptions. It's clearer. But 0:11:06.600 --> 0:11:09.160 maybe you would ultimately fail more because you would come 0:11:09.600 --> 0:11:11.880 up against these challenges. I think a lot of times 0:11:11.920 --> 0:11:14.240 when people try to make resolution or keep habits, they 0:11:14.280 --> 0:11:16.239 set it up in a way that's just not realistic, 0:11:16.520 --> 0:11:18.800 and then they fail and they feel like I have 0:11:18.800 --> 0:11:22.920 no self control, I have no discipline, I can't do anything, whereas, 0:11:22.960 --> 0:11:26.439 in fact, maybe you're better off saying like, given this exception, 0:11:26.480 --> 0:11:29.040 I can stick to my overall rule better. So you're 0:11:29.080 --> 0:11:31.439 setting yourself up for success because you're being more realistic 0:11:31.440 --> 0:11:34.480 about what's true about you and how you feel about 0:11:34.800 --> 0:11:38.760 how you want your life to unfold. Way. Yeah, oh wait, 0:11:38.760 --> 0:11:40.520 and can I just say one thing quickly about the 0:11:40.520 --> 0:11:42.680 giving up drinking. I will just say quickly that for 0:11:42.760 --> 0:11:45.199 some people it's easy to give up a temptation altogether 0:11:45.480 --> 0:11:48.479 than to be moderate. So you're being moderate, you're having it. Sometimes. 0:11:48.760 --> 0:11:50.520 I'm just throwing it out there that for some people, 0:11:50.520 --> 0:11:54.120 like me with some temptations, whether it's sugar or candy, 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:57.720 crush on your phone, or you know whatever, it might be, 0:11:57.920 --> 0:12:01.120 ruzzle alcohol, it's easier to to give up something altogether. 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:03.959 So if you're having a very hard time indulging, sometimes 0:12:04.360 --> 0:12:06.800 try giving something up altogether. It sounds harder, but for 0:12:06.840 --> 0:12:08.840 many people it is easier. For me, it's easier to 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:10.800 have no sugar than a little bit of sugar. So 0:12:10.840 --> 0:12:13.520 I just throw that out as an alternate strategy. Okay, 0:12:13.559 --> 0:12:16.800 what's yours? So, yeah, I want to try to not 0:12:16.840 --> 0:12:20.600 be addicted to Twitter, so I'm breaking a bad habit. Okay, So, 0:12:20.760 --> 0:12:23.080 but you told me that Twitter is something that you 0:12:23.120 --> 0:12:24.920 do at work, so it's not a temptation at home. 0:12:25.000 --> 0:12:26.880 Not really. I don't really use it on the weekends 0:12:26.960 --> 0:12:28.640 or nights. Okay. Do you use it on your phone 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:31.640 or on your desktop? My desktop? Okay. So it's always 0:12:31.640 --> 0:12:34.760 easier to change your circumstances than to change yourself. And 0:12:34.800 --> 0:12:37.120 one of the most powerful of the strategies is the 0:12:37.120 --> 0:12:40.000 twin strategies of convenience and inconvenience, we're much more likely 0:12:40.080 --> 0:12:42.000 to do something that it's convenient, and we're much less 0:12:42.000 --> 0:12:44.760 likely to do something if it's inconvenient, so deleted from 0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:48.920 your desktop Twitter. Problem with that, but you can check 0:12:48.960 --> 0:12:52.400 it on your phone. And also I use like the browser, 0:12:52.600 --> 0:12:55.840 so i'd have to I can't delete like Google Chrome. 0:12:56.360 --> 0:12:58.800 I go to like Twitter dot com. Basically, okay, well 0:12:58.840 --> 0:13:01.040 just don't go to Twitter, can you? Can you just 0:13:01.120 --> 0:13:03.040 not go to Twitter talk And I don't know. I 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:05.880 was telling Sam that sometimes my fingers will just type 0:13:05.920 --> 0:13:08.720 tw and it will open up. I mean, I know 0:13:08.760 --> 0:13:11.720 it's not magic, And I mean, is there is there 0:13:11.720 --> 0:13:14.480 like a thing so you could block it on your browser? Yes? 0:13:14.520 --> 0:13:17.679 I downloaded this app called Stay Focused. It gives you 0:13:17.679 --> 0:13:19.280 a certain amount of time that you could spend on 0:13:19.320 --> 0:13:22.800 a website. So basically I need to make the time short. 0:13:22.920 --> 0:13:24.720 Right now, I think I have three hours a day 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:28.160 to make it short, maybe like fifteen seconds. If you 0:13:28.200 --> 0:13:30.040 desperately need to check Twitter. You can always look on 0:13:30.080 --> 0:13:31.320 your phone, but you're just not going to check it 0:13:31.320 --> 0:13:34.280 on your desk, all right, fifteen seconds? Yeah, because the things, 0:13:34.320 --> 0:13:36.880 it's always better to set up your circumstances than to 0:13:36.920 --> 0:13:39.559 try to work on yourself. So just make it really, 0:13:39.559 --> 0:13:43.000 really inconvenient to do it. Somebody was saying that she 0:13:43.040 --> 0:13:45.400 always checked Twitter at home, so she said she had 0:13:45.440 --> 0:13:48.600 to be doing squats. Well, she checked Twitter, and it's like, 0:13:48.679 --> 0:13:50.400 there's this a limit how many squats you want to 0:13:50.400 --> 0:13:53.760 do in a day? She had a really good glutes. Yeah, yeah, 0:13:53.760 --> 0:13:58.000 but that wouldn't work for you in the workplace. Is 0:13:58.040 --> 0:14:01.920 there a moment when you can decide that you've become 0:14:01.920 --> 0:14:05.480 healthier and unblock it or is that just not allowed? Well, 0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:08.320 I think it's it's up for everybody to themselves. It 0:14:08.400 --> 0:14:11.679 sounds like you are feeling very like looking at Twitter 0:14:12.240 --> 0:14:15.640 makes you very uneasy and unsettled and distracts you. Now, 0:14:15.720 --> 0:14:17.720 it could be that events in the world will change 0:14:17.720 --> 0:14:20.360 in such a wonderful, happy way that you're looking at 0:14:20.360 --> 0:14:23.240 Twitter will just fill you with peace and contentment and joy, 0:14:23.320 --> 0:14:24.680 and in which case it will be great for you 0:14:24.680 --> 0:14:27.360 to go on Twitter. So when that happy moment arrives, 0:14:27.680 --> 0:14:29.760 you can go back into your stay focused app and 0:14:29.840 --> 0:14:35.640 change your change says Okay, all right, that it seems extreme, 0:14:36.160 --> 0:14:38.000 but I'm going to do it. But the strategy of 0:14:38.040 --> 0:14:40.680 convenience on the strategy of inconvenience or two strategies that 0:14:40.680 --> 0:14:44.000 work for just about everyone. If you want to do something, 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:46.440 make it easier. If you don't want to do something, 0:14:46.520 --> 0:14:49.880 make it harder. It's crazy. There's so much hilarious research 0:14:50.000 --> 0:14:52.400 about They did a study with people at a salad bar, 0:14:52.440 --> 0:14:55.120 and people took more when they could use spoons instead 0:14:55.120 --> 0:14:57.960 of tongs, because just using tongs is that much more 0:14:58.000 --> 0:15:01.440 work that people took less food. We're that susceptible. Wow, 0:15:01.480 --> 0:15:03.640 I had no idea what tongues or us for many 0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:07.000 people know the obstacle, but it's you know, it's just 0:15:07.120 --> 0:15:10.320 that much more difficult. So so yeah, Sam, let's go 0:15:10.360 --> 0:15:13.960 to your something. What I have is pretty generic. It 0:15:14.120 --> 0:15:15.840 just has to do with you know, to do lists. Yeah, 0:15:15.840 --> 0:15:19.360 I'd like to start using them and keeping to them, 0:15:19.440 --> 0:15:21.600 and I was curious to know your thoughts about them. 0:15:21.840 --> 0:15:24.360 So many many people find to do lists helpful. That's 0:15:24.400 --> 0:15:26.360 the strategy of clarity, because it's very clear what you're 0:15:26.360 --> 0:15:28.920 expecting of yourself. And it's also the strategy of monitoring 0:15:28.960 --> 0:15:31.680 because one of the great pleasures of to do list 0:15:31.720 --> 0:15:33.520 is getting to check off something that you've done, so 0:15:33.600 --> 0:15:35.160 you know what you've done and what you haven't done. 0:15:35.520 --> 0:15:38.720 And also it forces clarity because you're deciding what is 0:15:38.720 --> 0:15:41.240 going to go on the list. My personal view is 0:15:41.280 --> 0:15:43.160 that every to do list should begin with one or 0:15:43.160 --> 0:15:45.800 two things that have either already been accomplished or we'll 0:15:45.800 --> 0:15:48.040 take less than thirty seconds to do, so that you 0:15:48.120 --> 0:15:49.960 just start off by crossing something off your to do 0:15:50.040 --> 0:15:52.240 list the minute you write it down. But you haven't 0:15:52.240 --> 0:15:54.160 made to do list in the past. Is there any 0:15:54.160 --> 0:15:56.280 time in your life when you did keep to do lists? 0:15:56.400 --> 0:15:58.680 I mean I have on occasion I feel like like 0:15:58.680 --> 0:16:01.240 you're getting ready for a trip or something. Yeah. Sure, 0:16:01.400 --> 0:16:03.600 and even I tried it before a little bit here 0:16:03.640 --> 0:16:05.480 and there. But I think I need to be doing 0:16:05.480 --> 0:16:07.920 it on a consistent basis. And why do you feel 0:16:07.960 --> 0:16:09.960 like you haven't been doing it at a consistent base? Well, 0:16:10.040 --> 0:16:11.680 I feel like I have an over reliance on my memory. 0:16:11.840 --> 0:16:13.640 I feel like I can keep it all in my 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:15.240 head and I want what to do. Yeah, And and 0:16:15.360 --> 0:16:17.800 what I'm realizing, of course, is that that's no longer. 0:16:17.880 --> 0:16:20.320 Maybe it was never true at forty two, it is 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:23.120 certainly not true, and it's only going to be less 0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:26.280 true as I get older. Well, one thing also to 0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:28.160 keep in mind is just in terms of the efficiency 0:16:28.160 --> 0:16:30.080 of it, is that it frees up your mind. It 0:16:30.160 --> 0:16:31.840 might be I think that once you start keeping in 0:16:31.840 --> 0:16:33.440 to do list, you'll realize it kind of frees up 0:16:33.440 --> 0:16:35.880 some bandwidth because all that stuff that's circulating in your 0:16:35.880 --> 0:16:37.640 mind trying to help you remember what you need to 0:16:37.680 --> 0:16:40.040 do and like kind of pinging you throughout the day, 0:16:40.040 --> 0:16:42.400 don't forget about this, don't forget about that. Having it 0:16:42.480 --> 0:16:44.760 to do list can really free that. In fact, like 0:16:44.800 --> 0:16:46.600 if you have racing thoughts in the middle of the night, 0:16:46.640 --> 0:16:48.360 you know where you wake up and you can't shut 0:16:48.360 --> 0:16:50.280 off your mind, you can't come back to sleep. Writing 0:16:50.320 --> 0:16:52.320 it down helps because that frees up the brain. It's like, well, 0:16:52.320 --> 0:16:54.080 we don't have to keep thinking about this because it's 0:16:54.080 --> 0:16:56.920 been memorialized. You've offloaded it. You've offloaded it, and so 0:16:57.000 --> 0:16:58.720 you see that there and um, but so how do 0:16:58.720 --> 0:17:00.120 you make the habit of having it to do It's 0:17:00.120 --> 0:17:01.280 because it is the kind of thing that you have 0:17:01.320 --> 0:17:03.720 to do it consistently. So first of all, make it 0:17:03.800 --> 0:17:07.000 very convenient, like by yourself an attractive pad that's just 0:17:07.080 --> 0:17:09.960 the right pad for you. Sam's going to get so 0:17:10.080 --> 0:17:14.479 into that. Things feel easier when they're more pleasant and 0:17:14.520 --> 0:17:17.240 more beautiful. So like, treat this as a serious thing. 0:17:17.240 --> 0:17:19.440 It's not just some nasty scratch pad that you got 0:17:19.480 --> 0:17:21.919 from free from a bank or something. So when do 0:17:21.960 --> 0:17:23.200 you think you would do it? Are you gonna do 0:17:23.240 --> 0:17:24.960 it in the morning, You're gonna do in the evening? Both? 0:17:25.040 --> 0:17:27.680 What how do you visualize yourself using this? I see 0:17:27.720 --> 0:17:31.800 myself mostly using it in the evening, possibly but adding 0:17:31.840 --> 0:17:35.840 things to it as they present themselves. Okay, so you 0:17:35.920 --> 0:17:38.320 might want to experiment, like is every day a new 0:17:38.359 --> 0:17:39.919 to do list? Are you going to do a notebook 0:17:39.960 --> 0:17:42.560 where it's running forward? Like people have different There's like 0:17:42.600 --> 0:17:46.920 a lot of cool strategies for people that who are 0:17:47.000 --> 0:17:50.280 really embraced the to do list. Um, I just keep 0:17:50.320 --> 0:17:51.800 as simple to do list. And that sounds like what 0:17:51.840 --> 0:17:55.239 you're talking about. You might start at the very end 0:17:55.280 --> 0:17:57.239 of the day and really have a period of your 0:17:57.280 --> 0:17:58.840 day when you're like, this is the last thing I 0:17:58.880 --> 0:18:01.080 do before I go home. This is what I do. Like, 0:18:01.160 --> 0:18:03.160 maybe if there's some other thing that you often do 0:18:03.280 --> 0:18:06.399 right before you leave, you want to piggyback this habit 0:18:06.440 --> 0:18:08.560 onto that habit that will help install. So is there 0:18:08.640 --> 0:18:10.040 something that you typically do at the end of the 0:18:10.119 --> 0:18:14.040 day before I leave the office? Not particularly, No, it 0:18:14.040 --> 0:18:17.520 would be something I think I should probably develop because 0:18:17.560 --> 0:18:19.399 in and of itself, I usually am like I'm working 0:18:19.400 --> 0:18:21.720 and then I'm not working right right, right right, So 0:18:21.800 --> 0:18:23.280 maybe you want to say, like before I pick up 0:18:23.280 --> 0:18:25.720 my backpack, or like before I you know, pull out 0:18:25.720 --> 0:18:28.240 my idea or whatever it is, I'm gonna check the 0:18:28.280 --> 0:18:30.119 to do list and just really try to make it 0:18:30.200 --> 0:18:32.280 an official part of your day, like something just like 0:18:32.359 --> 0:18:34.159 checking your email. You have to check your email one 0:18:34.160 --> 0:18:35.800 more time before you walk out. You have to check 0:18:35.840 --> 0:18:38.640 your to do list, because it's only it's help. You're 0:18:38.640 --> 0:18:40.080 only going to get out of it what you put 0:18:40.080 --> 0:18:41.720 into it, And so you want to get into the 0:18:41.760 --> 0:18:44.919 habit of using it regularly and checking it. Um. And 0:18:44.960 --> 0:18:48.240 I will say some people really resist to do lists. Um. 0:18:48.280 --> 0:18:50.960 I have my four Tendencies framework, which divides all humanity 0:18:50.960 --> 0:18:54.040 into four tendencies. And there's a tendency called the rebel tendency, 0:18:54.119 --> 0:18:56.320 and they tend to really bridle at to do list. 0:18:56.560 --> 0:18:58.359 So what you can also think of this as they 0:18:58.440 --> 0:19:00.600 could do lists. These are the because that you have 0:19:00.680 --> 0:19:03.080 to do. They're just things that you could do if 0:19:03.080 --> 0:19:05.080 you feel like it during your day. You could do 0:19:05.160 --> 0:19:07.400 these things. You could do other things, but you could 0:19:07.440 --> 0:19:11.920 do these things. No pressure, Becca, you have another resolution, 0:19:12.040 --> 0:19:16.520