1 00:00:00,360 --> 00:00:02,519 Speaker 1: She is my rock. I don't know what I will 2 00:00:02,520 --> 00:00:06,280 Speaker 1: do without her. What happens if I lose her? And 3 00:00:06,360 --> 00:00:13,840 Speaker 1: I've said that, I'm screwed. My kids are ruined. Daddy 4 00:00:14,040 --> 00:00:17,639 Speaker 1: is looney. He has lost his mind. Why because he 5 00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:19,919 Speaker 1: lost his rock and he didn't know what he was 6 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:21,400 Speaker 1: going to do without her, and then he lost her 7 00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:24,799 Speaker 1: and guess what, he doesn't know what to do. She 8 00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:26,400 Speaker 1: was my rock and I didn't know what to do 9 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:42,040 Speaker 1: without her, and now I'm lost. What's up? Everybody? Welcome 10 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:46,120 Speaker 1: to the podcast. Happy Monday. I hope everybody got their 11 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:49,440 Speaker 1: share of Thanksgiving. If you're watching this real time, if 12 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:53,480 Speaker 1: you're listening real time, I hope you had a great Thanksgiving. 13 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:56,280 Speaker 1: It's just me today. I'm gonna do the podcast alone 14 00:00:57,240 --> 00:01:00,720 Speaker 1: because of everyone traveling and because of the crazy schedules. 15 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:05,800 Speaker 1: I could have pulled a guest in here, and then 16 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:07,920 Speaker 1: I would have been getting them away from their family. 17 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 1: So I decided to just do it myself. Eventually, I'm 18 00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:12,880 Speaker 1: gonna get amber. We're still trying to figure out how 19 00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:17,399 Speaker 1: to how to watch the baby and the kids, and she's, 20 00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:21,000 Speaker 1: you know, breastfeeding every sixteen seconds right now, so it's 21 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,800 Speaker 1: still a little tough, but I'm definitely gonna get her 22 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:26,120 Speaker 1: back as a guest. For those of you that are 23 00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:28,720 Speaker 1: not familiar with this podcast, the way that we set 24 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:31,200 Speaker 1: this up is usually it's me and a guest and 25 00:01:31,319 --> 00:01:34,080 Speaker 1: I'll go through your questions. If you have a question 26 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:39,120 Speaker 1: for me, email Graingersmith podcast at gmail dot com. It 27 00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:42,679 Speaker 1: could be about any subject. I'll answer it for you 28 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:44,920 Speaker 1: and the best way that I know how. It's not 29 00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:48,240 Speaker 1: always the correct answer, it's not always the wrong answer, 30 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:51,720 Speaker 1: but it's just a conversation as if I'm giving you 31 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:57,720 Speaker 1: advice in a normal campfire. Hey, can I ask you 32 00:01:57,760 --> 00:02:00,880 Speaker 1: something that's really bothering me, or it's really been on 33 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:03,920 Speaker 1: my mind, or this is weighing heavy on me, and 34 00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:07,320 Speaker 1: I walk through it with you as if you're my friend, 35 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:09,679 Speaker 1: and I feel like you are, if you're listening to 36 00:02:09,680 --> 00:02:13,160 Speaker 1: this podcast and you've been on this journey for me 37 00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:16,840 Speaker 1: for a long time, years many episodes that I feel 38 00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:20,560 Speaker 1: like we're friends. I look just the other day and 39 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:25,959 Speaker 1: this podcast was on the Apple Charts, the Top Charts. 40 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:30,680 Speaker 1: It was number four, ranked number four in the music 41 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:34,840 Speaker 1: genre of all podcasts in the world in the music genre, 42 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:39,800 Speaker 1: Which blows me. It blows me. Away. I can't believe 43 00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:47,720 Speaker 1: that this podcast has come so far to be consistently 44 00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:51,760 Speaker 1: in the top You might think, well, we need to 45 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:54,239 Speaker 1: get it to number one. Well, what's important to remember 46 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:57,600 Speaker 1: is we're playing the long game here, so as you 47 00:02:57,720 --> 00:03:03,320 Speaker 1: listen to this podcast episode after episode after I'm we're 48 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:07,680 Speaker 1: keeping it in the top charts week in and week out. 49 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 1: We're not. What I mean is we're not pushing it 50 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:13,040 Speaker 1: to trying to push it to number one for one 51 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 1: particular time frame. We just wanted to stay relevant for 52 00:03:17,639 --> 00:03:20,160 Speaker 1: a long time frame, Like we just want to stay 53 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:23,360 Speaker 1: in the top fifty for a long time. That's the goal, 54 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:26,960 Speaker 1: not a quick number one and then it falls back 55 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:29,840 Speaker 1: to number sixty eight tomorrow. You know what I mean? 56 00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:36,560 Speaker 1: Bottom line is thank you. I just it's it's I 57 00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:40,240 Speaker 1: just got nothing but gratitude. I love this this platform, 58 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,280 Speaker 1: and I love being able to be able to speak 59 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:48,119 Speaker 1: in to your work or your truck or your traveling 60 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 1: or wherever your workouts. Wherever you listen to this podcast, 61 00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:56,160 Speaker 1: thank you, and whatever platform you listen to, whether it's 62 00:03:56,440 --> 00:04:00,520 Speaker 1: YouTube or Spotify or Apple Music or whatever podcast app listening, 63 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:04,560 Speaker 1: just thank you. I'm gonna dig into these questions once again. 64 00:04:04,560 --> 00:04:08,000 Speaker 1: If you have a question for me, email Grangersmith Podcast 65 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. And the first one. And I 66 00:04:13,280 --> 00:04:15,560 Speaker 1: haven't really vetted any of these except for the first one. 67 00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:17,440 Speaker 1: I just grabbed the first one because I was like, Okay, cool, 68 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:19,400 Speaker 1: this is this is a good way to get into it. 69 00:04:20,520 --> 00:04:24,480 Speaker 1: It says who the heck is Earl Hi Grangeur. I've 70 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,480 Speaker 1: been watching your family YouTube videos for over a year now, 71 00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:30,760 Speaker 1: and I listen to your podcast. Don't be mad at me, 72 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:34,799 Speaker 1: but I haven't been watching or listening from the very beginning. 73 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:38,120 Speaker 1: So your character Earl Dibbles is so weird to me. 74 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:41,240 Speaker 1: Can you explain where he come, where he came from, 75 00:04:41,279 --> 00:04:48,240 Speaker 1: and why he's a thing? Thanks? This is Kelly from Gettysburg, Pennsylvania. 76 00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:51,040 Speaker 1: I guess if you haven't been listening from the beginning, 77 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:54,040 Speaker 1: it's a legit question, Kelly, And I don't blame you 78 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:58,440 Speaker 1: at all. I'm not mad at you at all, because 79 00:04:58,480 --> 00:05:02,599 Speaker 1: you're actually right. It is so so weird. It's so weird. 80 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:10,719 Speaker 1: So if you guys know this story, then you could 81 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:16,840 Speaker 1: just fast forward. But for Kelly, two thy eleven, I 82 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:18,640 Speaker 1: was coming out when I was working on an album 83 00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:23,719 Speaker 1: called Dirt Road Driveway Now you gotta imagine in twenty eleven, 84 00:05:24,360 --> 00:05:28,440 Speaker 1: I had maybe a small, very small following in Texas, 85 00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:33,080 Speaker 1: but nothing outside of the state. And the following I 86 00:05:33,160 --> 00:05:36,359 Speaker 1: had would be I could go to several of the 87 00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:39,599 Speaker 1: major cities in Texas and pull about eighty ninety or 88 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:42,560 Speaker 1: one hundred people. That's what I'm talking about, small following, 89 00:05:43,279 --> 00:05:46,320 Speaker 1: and that was great compared to five years before that, 90 00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:53,680 Speaker 1: when I could pull five people maybe sometimes zero. So 91 00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:57,400 Speaker 1: Tyler and I and my brother we were watching a 92 00:05:57,400 --> 00:06:00,920 Speaker 1: lot of YouTube in twenty eleven. YouTube was still pretty 93 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:04,080 Speaker 1: new and not a lot of people used the platform, 94 00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:07,720 Speaker 1: but we watched some comedy stuff on there. There was 95 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:10,560 Speaker 1: a channel called Balloon Shop, and we watched this and 96 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:13,719 Speaker 1: we laughed and laughed at these guys, these like guys 97 00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:16,320 Speaker 1: in their twenties, and they would just make these skits, 98 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:18,960 Speaker 1: just funny skits, and Tyler and I laughed and laughed. 99 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,800 Speaker 1: We'd watch it. No one else was really watching it 100 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:24,599 Speaker 1: at that time, and we thought, let's make some skits. 101 00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:27,960 Speaker 1: It'd be fun and maybe if one of them goes viral, 102 00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:31,359 Speaker 1: which not much was going viral in that time on YouTube, 103 00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:34,760 Speaker 1: if one of them went viral, then maybe that would 104 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:38,360 Speaker 1: help the music and if anything, we're just gonna have fun. 105 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:45,360 Speaker 1: So we made we started many videos. One of them 106 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:48,800 Speaker 1: and by the way, this was in two thousand and 107 00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 1: about eight. Earl Dibbles didn't come to twenty eleven, but 108 00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:57,360 Speaker 1: this YouTube conversation thing I'm talking about was like two 109 00:06:57,360 --> 00:07:01,000 Speaker 1: thousand and eight. So we started making what we called 110 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:03,000 Speaker 1: video of the weeks. If you want to go down 111 00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:06,480 Speaker 1: this rabbit hole of me on YouTube, sometimes we did. 112 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:09,040 Speaker 1: We actually did it with the band not too long ago. 113 00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:12,080 Speaker 1: Because you can go down this crazy rabbit hole of 114 00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:16,960 Speaker 1: finding me in these skits to two thousand and eight, nine, ten, 115 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:20,280 Speaker 1: and they just keep going and going, and then you 116 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:23,560 Speaker 1: keep discovering new things, even for me because I forget 117 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:27,280 Speaker 1: about them. But there's this there's these videos. We called 118 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,080 Speaker 1: them video of the weeks. And I had this single 119 00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:36,400 Speaker 1: called Colorblind, and there's one called El Mattador. There's one 120 00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:40,520 Speaker 1: called Where's the Radio Station, There's one called Don't Take 121 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:44,160 Speaker 1: Your Pants Off, There's one They just go on and 122 00:07:44,200 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: on and on. These are little titles and these little 123 00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:51,120 Speaker 1: skits that we did, and we were looking for one 124 00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:55,680 Speaker 1: of them to pop, to go viral. And so the 125 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:59,720 Speaker 1: first character I did, I believe is called Don't Touch 126 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:04,360 Speaker 1: the Turtles, and that was just a random country character 127 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:07,160 Speaker 1: called Don't Touch the Turtles, and that was a little skit. 128 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:10,600 Speaker 1: And then I believe the second character we did was 129 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:16,440 Speaker 1: called Freddy's Enchiladas. The third character I believe was called 130 00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:23,120 Speaker 1: Live with lionel In. The fourth character I believe was 131 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:26,760 Speaker 1: called Earl Dibbles Junior. So this is I'm trying to 132 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:29,280 Speaker 1: give you the timeline the evolution of these videos. And 133 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:33,960 Speaker 1: we were making skits and making not vlogs. They were 134 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:38,680 Speaker 1: someone else Filming vlogs wasn't a thing. Then Earl Dibbles 135 00:08:38,760 --> 00:08:42,040 Speaker 1: was just another one of these characters coming down the line. 136 00:08:42,080 --> 00:08:45,800 Speaker 1: It was his country character, and I had spoken in 137 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:50,360 Speaker 1: that voice. I'm Earl Dibbles Junior. I'm a country boy. 138 00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:54,000 Speaker 1: I would use that voice, you know, because it represented 139 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:59,079 Speaker 1: half of my family and people we'd met on the road, 140 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:02,200 Speaker 1: and it was real easy to get into that voice 141 00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:05,560 Speaker 1: and start talking real country like Earl Devils Junior. He's 142 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:09,240 Speaker 1: a country boy, So I would. It was a voice 143 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:11,640 Speaker 1: before it was a video. Then then we decided to 144 00:09:11,679 --> 00:09:14,400 Speaker 1: make a video. So we were at my parents' house 145 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:17,679 Speaker 1: and I had these old overalls that I used to 146 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:20,560 Speaker 1: wear in my senior year in high school on game days. 147 00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:23,760 Speaker 1: We wore them to school. And then I always wore 148 00:09:23,840 --> 00:09:25,880 Speaker 1: red wing boots. I had those, and I put on 149 00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:29,400 Speaker 1: this white tank top and this one of my dad's 150 00:09:29,400 --> 00:09:33,400 Speaker 1: old farm caps, and then Tyler draws these tattoos on 151 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: me with sharpie, and it was just we just didn't 152 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,200 Speaker 1: think that this was going to be something I was 153 00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:44,920 Speaker 1: doing ten years from then that I still do today. 154 00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:48,600 Speaker 1: We didn't think that that was gonna happen. We went 155 00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:51,280 Speaker 1: out and made this video and I set up a 156 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:55,880 Speaker 1: tripod and I basically I sat in the tripod and 157 00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:58,200 Speaker 1: I said, I sat in front of the tripod and 158 00:09:58,280 --> 00:10:02,320 Speaker 1: I said this series of things just to whatever came 159 00:10:02,360 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 1: off the top of my head. And then we went 160 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:09,560 Speaker 1: back and filmed the things that I said. So, for instance, 161 00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:13,200 Speaker 1: I said, I wake up, put a good dip in, 162 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:18,720 Speaker 1: crack a cold, get dressed, and start the day. And 163 00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,600 Speaker 1: then I went through that down this line of things 164 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:23,160 Speaker 1: where I would say and I was just making it 165 00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:29,280 Speaker 1: up as I go, whittle a good stick, I do 166 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:34,679 Speaker 1: exploring in the woods, fix the tree, shoot the gun, 167 00:10:35,880 --> 00:10:39,640 Speaker 1: and walk around, sit on logs. I mean, like the 168 00:10:39,679 --> 00:10:42,840 Speaker 1: most random things, and then we played it back and 169 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:44,719 Speaker 1: then I and then I acted out that, and then 170 00:10:44,720 --> 00:10:47,720 Speaker 1: I when I edited it that day, I put those 171 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:51,000 Speaker 1: those that that b roll what we call it, on 172 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:54,440 Speaker 1: top of the a roll literally threw it out. The 173 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,439 Speaker 1: next day wasn't it was no big deal and it 174 00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:02,559 Speaker 1: went viral. So that is and then a lot of 175 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,720 Speaker 1: things happened after that, like ye ye was in that 176 00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: video that that's the very beginning, Kelly answer to answer 177 00:11:12,559 --> 00:11:16,800 Speaker 1: your question. It's funny. It's really early in the morning 178 00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:21,280 Speaker 1: right now as I'm recording this podcast, and so it's 179 00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:23,600 Speaker 1: still easy even in the morning to talk it like 180 00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:27,040 Speaker 1: Earl Dubbles Junior because he's counchy and he gets up 181 00:11:27,040 --> 00:11:32,480 Speaker 1: when the sun comes up, all right time to get 182 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 1: to something. I saved that one, but I think I 183 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:41,400 Speaker 1: think there's there's more on here that are more serious. 184 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:43,760 Speaker 1: Some of y'all are, like I thought Earl Dibbles Junior 185 00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:49,760 Speaker 1: was serious. Shoot, okay, here how about this one. It's 186 00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:52,480 Speaker 1: called advice on cars, Hey Granger. I'm fourteen years old 187 00:11:52,679 --> 00:11:57,640 Speaker 1: outside of Denver. I started to save up for my 188 00:11:57,679 --> 00:12:00,800 Speaker 1: first car, and my parents said they will support me 189 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:02,800 Speaker 1: in whatever I choose to get I'm looking to get. 190 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:08,440 Speaker 1: I'm looking at Crownvix around two thousand era Mustangs. Crownvix 191 00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:11,440 Speaker 1: and two thousand era Mustangs. When I told my parents this, 192 00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:13,760 Speaker 1: they told me a car like that will tempt me 193 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:17,160 Speaker 1: to street race. You want a car like that because 194 00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:22,319 Speaker 1: because they are more damaged and easier to have problems 195 00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 1: that I can learn to fix. What should I do? Sorry, 196 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:32,439 Speaker 1: I'm trying to read this comes from Nathaniel. What your 197 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:36,839 Speaker 1: question is? What should I do? Two parts? One, listen 198 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:46,959 Speaker 1: to your parents. Listen to your parents. Two. I think 199 00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:51,200 Speaker 1: you're putting I think it's a good side project for 200 00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:54,319 Speaker 1: you to be thinking about this, and it's definitely good 201 00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,960 Speaker 1: to be saving money. But I think you're putting too 202 00:12:57,040 --> 00:13:04,720 Speaker 1: much emphasis on this car at fourteen, when two years 203 00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:09,719 Speaker 1: your your whole opinion could change. And so I think 204 00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:12,040 Speaker 1: you're worried too much, especially if you want to right 205 00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:15,040 Speaker 1: into this podcast about this. I think you're just you're 206 00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:19,560 Speaker 1: just anticipating a little too early on a question like this. 207 00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:23,040 Speaker 1: So I would say the answer is easy. Your parents 208 00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:25,080 Speaker 1: said you're going to They're gonna support you in whatever 209 00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:28,760 Speaker 1: you get. Cool, Just save the money, don't worry about 210 00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:31,720 Speaker 1: telling them what you want right now, and then when 211 00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:34,800 Speaker 1: when you have enough money and you're looking on Craigslist 212 00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:39,600 Speaker 1: or wherever you're looking eBay whatever, use car lot and 213 00:13:39,640 --> 00:13:44,400 Speaker 1: then you see that that two thousand era Mustang for 214 00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:51,000 Speaker 1: fifty eight hundred dollars and you've saved sixty one hundred dollars. 215 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:54,800 Speaker 1: Then you go to your parents and you go, look 216 00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 1: here it is. I've got this money, and it's it's 217 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:02,800 Speaker 1: a safe car, and it's it's a V six. I'm 218 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:06,360 Speaker 1: not going to street race in it, mom, And that 219 00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:10,319 Speaker 1: conversation is very different. But the most important thing besides 220 00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:14,320 Speaker 1: saving your money is is respecting your parents. Your parents 221 00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 1: are doing this out of love. They love you. Why 222 00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:20,440 Speaker 1: do they not want you to street race? First of all, 223 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:23,360 Speaker 1: they probably maybe they see something in you that could 224 00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:27,520 Speaker 1: be I have a tendency to be crazy, and so 225 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:29,960 Speaker 1: they want to protect you. They don't want you to 226 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:32,400 Speaker 1: get in trouble with the law. So there's a lot 227 00:14:32,440 --> 00:14:35,480 Speaker 1: of they're not telling you to not do this because 228 00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:39,440 Speaker 1: they just are bored and have nothing else to tell you. Nathaniel, 229 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:42,680 Speaker 1: listen to your parents, save your money, make this decision 230 00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:49,080 Speaker 1: two years from now. That's my vice. Next up, it 231 00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:52,760 Speaker 1: says The subject line says struggling. I have not read 232 00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:55,400 Speaker 1: this yet. I'm about to read it right now. Hey Granger, 233 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:57,960 Speaker 1: I would like to remain anonymous, but I'm twenty seven 234 00:14:58,040 --> 00:15:00,080 Speaker 1: years I'm a twenty seven year old girl from in 235 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:03,440 Speaker 1: I like to start off by saying thank you for 236 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,760 Speaker 1: everything that you do. There's always a lot of comfort 237 00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:08,160 Speaker 1: in the words that you that you have from your 238 00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:11,680 Speaker 1: friends and your family and the word of God. I 239 00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:14,360 Speaker 1: feel like this is something I've always struggled with, but 240 00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:16,920 Speaker 1: it seems like it's getting harder with time, and I'm 241 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:20,480 Speaker 1: not really sure how to put this into a question. 242 00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:24,680 Speaker 1: It seems that every time I turn around, it's the 243 00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:27,560 Speaker 1: cruel people around me that are the ones who win 244 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,760 Speaker 1: when it comes to time here on earth. There have 245 00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:34,720 Speaker 1: been countless times where I thought about just giving up 246 00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:38,920 Speaker 1: and being as harsh and mean as everyone else to 247 00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:41,440 Speaker 1: see if it would change my luck or outcome. But 248 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:44,200 Speaker 1: ultimately that's just not who I am as a person. 249 00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,560 Speaker 1: I love to love and I love to be kind 250 00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:52,040 Speaker 1: to people. I'm just feeling overwhelmingly beat up. It just 251 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:55,160 Speaker 1: doesn't seem like this is a specific area of my life. 252 00:15:57,120 --> 00:16:01,640 Speaker 1: But everywhere you're sorry again, it just doesn't seem like 253 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:04,240 Speaker 1: this is in a specific area of my life, but 254 00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:10,200 Speaker 1: just everywhere I turn. Without really having a question, I'm 255 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,880 Speaker 1: just writing you to look for more, I guess advice 256 00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:17,960 Speaker 1: on why not to be discouraged. Thank you, Anonymous from Indiana, 257 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:24,680 Speaker 1: twenty seven. Well, first of all, Anonymous, this is biblical. 258 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:27,600 Speaker 1: What you're saying is there. It's in the Bible. It 259 00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:31,560 Speaker 1: says that you know, the sun shines on the wicked 260 00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:39,920 Speaker 1: just as it shines on the righteous. So I'm paraphrasing here, 261 00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:46,040 Speaker 1: but there is there's this idea that God's blessing, he 262 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:50,560 Speaker 1: will bestow his blessing upon the earth, upon mankind, upon 263 00:16:51,600 --> 00:17:00,200 Speaker 1: his image bearers, and that that doesn't that doesn't reflect 264 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:06,320 Speaker 1: because of the person that you are. It doesn't. God 265 00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:10,080 Speaker 1: doesn't put more blessings on the good people or the 266 00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:16,320 Speaker 1: nice people. That's obvious, right, Like there's the the person 267 00:17:16,359 --> 00:17:18,840 Speaker 1: at the biggest house on the street up on the hill, 268 00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:24,399 Speaker 1: with all the with all the all the fences and 269 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:29,520 Speaker 1: gardens and workers and roads and pathways and stories and 270 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:33,239 Speaker 1: cars in the garage. That doesn't mean that they're a 271 00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:36,639 Speaker 1: good person. This is not front page news. We just 272 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:40,040 Speaker 1: know this is how the world works. It doesn't matter. 273 00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:45,439 Speaker 1: God doesn't doesn't choose blessings based on your actions. And 274 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:49,719 Speaker 1: that's actually a very important concept of the Bible because 275 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:56,960 Speaker 1: God doesn't show favor on us based on our works anyway. 276 00:17:57,440 --> 00:18:06,560 Speaker 1: It's always based on our faith, and his blessing ultimately 277 00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:12,679 Speaker 1: comes in salvation after this life after life here. So 278 00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:17,280 Speaker 1: if you look back in the historical characters of the Bible, that, 279 00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:23,399 Speaker 1: for instance, we'll start with Abraham, Abraham was blessed because 280 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:27,240 Speaker 1: of his faith, not because of his works, not because 281 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:31,040 Speaker 1: of things that he did, not because of his generosity. 282 00:18:32,359 --> 00:18:35,160 Speaker 1: The generosity and the things that he did are an 283 00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:39,280 Speaker 1: outcropping of the faith. They came afterward. They were the 284 00:18:39,359 --> 00:18:44,960 Speaker 1: result of his faith. So what I'm telling you, Anonymous, 285 00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:48,880 Speaker 1: is you can't just throw up your hands and go, well, 286 00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,679 Speaker 1: I'm trying to be a good person here and God's 287 00:18:52,720 --> 00:18:55,440 Speaker 1: not blessing me. That's not exactly what you're saying. But 288 00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:59,000 Speaker 1: the Bible says that your works you're trying to be 289 00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:02,359 Speaker 1: a good person is like dirty rags to him because 290 00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:10,080 Speaker 1: you can't be good enough for God can't. So your 291 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:14,639 Speaker 1: question is basically, how do I not be discouraged? Should 292 00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:16,760 Speaker 1: I just give up and be bad like everyone else. 293 00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:22,800 Speaker 1: No by no means no no. But you you just 294 00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:25,480 Speaker 1: need to realize the way that this this globe in 295 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:32,280 Speaker 1: the universe is turning. And and you will never you 296 00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:38,320 Speaker 1: will never be discouraged because you decided to be good, 297 00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 1: a good person with integrity. Because at the end of 298 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:43,320 Speaker 1: the day, when you lay your head on your pillow 299 00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:47,560 Speaker 1: and you chose to chose to be take to take 300 00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:51,680 Speaker 1: the higher road, to have integrity, you will you will 301 00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:58,880 Speaker 1: ultimately sleep better. And that's not gonna You're not gonna 302 00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:01,760 Speaker 1: guarantee people are nice to. You are nice to in 303 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:07,720 Speaker 1: your return. But over time, the more integrity you have, 304 00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:17,160 Speaker 1: and I'm talking integrity meaning honesty, trustworthiness, kindness, the ability 305 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:22,639 Speaker 1: to listen more than you talk. There's these attributes that 306 00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:26,280 Speaker 1: over time you practice these things, over time, you're going 307 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:30,199 Speaker 1: to see the fruits of that from the people around you. 308 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:33,000 Speaker 1: And if you don't, it's time to change the people 309 00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:36,760 Speaker 1: around you. So and I don't know where you are 310 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:40,080 Speaker 1: in this situation, but sometimes you need to change the 311 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:45,600 Speaker 1: people around you. And I would say, I would say 312 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:47,840 Speaker 1: that's most likely the case. Is what's happening with you 313 00:20:47,920 --> 00:20:52,040 Speaker 1: is you're surrounding yourself with people that are angry and cruel, 314 00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:55,280 Speaker 1: because I don't think you're talking about the lady that's 315 00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:58,919 Speaker 1: serving you McDonald's. I think you're talking about your family 316 00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:02,160 Speaker 1: or your friends that are immediately around you. And it's important. 317 00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:04,399 Speaker 1: It's important that sometimes you need to put up your 318 00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:12,199 Speaker 1: hands and go. Friend. I love you, but but I 319 00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:16,760 Speaker 1: need some space away from you because because I can't 320 00:21:17,119 --> 00:21:20,720 Speaker 1: be around this kind of negativity, because it is, it is, 321 00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:27,399 Speaker 1: it's becoming a problem to me. So stay around positive people. 322 00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:30,760 Speaker 1: Remember that your face that God's favor doesn't fall just 323 00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:34,399 Speaker 1: upon the good people. Remember that you being good doesn't 324 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,640 Speaker 1: help you get closer to God. And remember that being 325 00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:40,840 Speaker 1: around positive people will help you sleep better at night. 326 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:46,920 Speaker 1: And you could never be wrong with upholding your own integrity. 327 00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:54,680 Speaker 1: I'm gonna take a break and be right back. Thank 328 00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:56,840 Speaker 1: you for listening to the podcast. I have a few 329 00:21:57,119 --> 00:22:00,840 Speaker 1: sponsors today and they're all by people very well over 330 00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:03,879 Speaker 1: at EEE Apparel. If you haven't heard about the Newyee Jerky, 331 00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:06,239 Speaker 1: you have to check this out. I know that this 332 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:08,679 Speaker 1: is a crazy time and I believe this is what 333 00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:11,679 Speaker 1: cyber Monday today, that this is coming out. So we 334 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,160 Speaker 1: have so many sales going on. So many discounts going 335 00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:16,679 Speaker 1: on at ee apparel. If you go to eee dot com, 336 00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:19,000 Speaker 1: you can find all this stuff. If you've wanted ee 337 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:22,120 Speaker 1: apparel for your family or for a gift or for yourself, 338 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,560 Speaker 1: this is the perfect time to do it. Cyber money 339 00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:26,560 Speaker 1: is the perfect time to do it. But I really 340 00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:29,240 Speaker 1: want to talk about this EEE jerky because this stuff 341 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:32,520 Speaker 1: is really special. It's brand new project for us. We've 342 00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:35,720 Speaker 1: never done anything like this, So I want you to 343 00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:38,800 Speaker 1: try it and I want you to love it. And 344 00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:42,439 Speaker 1: right now we're selling it for eight ninety nine we 345 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:46,000 Speaker 1: per bag. That's like three and a half ounces. It's 346 00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,719 Speaker 1: the best deal we could possibly give to you. And 347 00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:50,880 Speaker 1: we have tried this for years, coming up with this recipe, 348 00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:52,560 Speaker 1: trying to get it right. This is not about some 349 00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:55,399 Speaker 1: big company coming in and saying, hey, we want to 350 00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:58,080 Speaker 1: slap EE on our jerkey that we've been making for 351 00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:00,879 Speaker 1: a thousand years. That's not that we have been working 352 00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:05,000 Speaker 1: through this recipe. These are Texas owned cattle that we 353 00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:08,080 Speaker 1: know the ranchers from. We know everything involved in this process, 354 00:23:08,560 --> 00:23:11,560 Speaker 1: and I think it'd be the perfect stocking stuffer for 355 00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:13,680 Speaker 1: you or for your kid, or for your husband or 356 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:17,600 Speaker 1: for your wife or for your friends that have followed 357 00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:20,560 Speaker 1: the EEE journey. I think it's a really good addition 358 00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:22,560 Speaker 1: to our brand. I also want to talk to you 359 00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:25,480 Speaker 1: about EE radio. Pretty much everything I could say, we'll 360 00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:29,600 Speaker 1: start with ee We'll talk about EE radio. This is 361 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:32,480 Speaker 1: such a fun component to our brand and what we do, 362 00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:36,080 Speaker 1: and this is something I could offer you totally free. 363 00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:38,720 Speaker 1: It's the EEE Radio app. You can get it on 364 00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,680 Speaker 1: Android or Apple, or you can go to ee radio 365 00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:46,959 Speaker 1: dot com. But regardless, it's free. It's also commercial free, 366 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:50,480 Speaker 1: and it is the playlist of your life, at least 367 00:23:50,520 --> 00:23:52,520 Speaker 1: we try to make it that way. So all you 368 00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:55,240 Speaker 1: got to do the app is so simple. We don't 369 00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:58,680 Speaker 1: collect any of your information, it's none of that. All 370 00:23:58,720 --> 00:24:01,399 Speaker 1: we want out of this is you or listen, because 371 00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:04,359 Speaker 1: through your listens, that's how we could build the app 372 00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:07,880 Speaker 1: and grow it that way. So you pretty much get 373 00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:10,320 Speaker 1: it and you just open the app and boom, it 374 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:14,480 Speaker 1: starts playing. We have built a playlist, a seasonal playlist 375 00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,760 Speaker 1: for you. So it is it is a radio station 376 00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:21,359 Speaker 1: based on EEE Nation, and we also love to get 377 00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,560 Speaker 1: your to get your feedback on it, so you could 378 00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:27,760 Speaker 1: follow EU radio on Instagram. Or Twitter, Facebook, and you 379 00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:31,760 Speaker 1: can give us comments and updates on songs you like. 380 00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,760 Speaker 1: Maybe you're a new artist and you want your song 381 00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:38,800 Speaker 1: played ONYEU Radio. Hey, follow us on Instagram and give 382 00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:42,040 Speaker 1: us your comment and let's hear your song. We want 383 00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:44,760 Speaker 1: to build the playlist to your life, and that's what 384 00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:48,960 Speaker 1: we're doing. Download the app EEU Radio. Finally, if you 385 00:24:49,119 --> 00:24:54,800 Speaker 1: want a quick, easy gift for someone this Christmas, why 386 00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:58,800 Speaker 1: not use Cameo. Go to cameo dot com look me up. 387 00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:01,919 Speaker 1: You can get in a basically a video message. I 388 00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:06,240 Speaker 1: will make you a customized video message to anybody about 389 00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:13,280 Speaker 1: any subject, even yourself, your spouse's birthday, or most likely 390 00:25:13,520 --> 00:25:16,960 Speaker 1: a Merry Christmas. It's super easy. It comes right to 391 00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:20,040 Speaker 1: your phone. You get the video message customized to whatever 392 00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:22,280 Speaker 1: you told me to say. I'll read it right off 393 00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:27,320 Speaker 1: the screen and it's very personal and very special. Cameo 394 00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:30,000 Speaker 1: dot com go find me there. Back to the podcast, 395 00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:37,920 Speaker 1: back to the questions here. If you have any email, 396 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:43,080 Speaker 1: Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com, and I'm gonna pull 397 00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:48,240 Speaker 1: up one it says subject line relationship break up at Vice. Hey, 398 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:50,480 Speaker 1: grangeur have been a fan for many, many years. I've 399 00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:53,040 Speaker 1: even gotten the opportunity to meet you once through a 400 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:56,199 Speaker 1: meet and greet. Your drive, ambition, story and who you 401 00:25:56,240 --> 00:26:00,119 Speaker 1: are as a person extremely expiring, inspiring to me. Thank 402 00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:03,200 Speaker 1: you brother. I'm twenty three years old, he says, I 403 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:06,199 Speaker 1: have a great job, a college degree. My girlfriend of 404 00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:09,000 Speaker 1: a year and a half broke up with me over 405 00:26:09,040 --> 00:26:13,080 Speaker 1: a text message weeks after I bought an engagement ring 406 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,520 Speaker 1: and will not talk to me or even respond to 407 00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:22,000 Speaker 1: me in any form. I moved out when she was 408 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:26,480 Speaker 1: not home and let me read that again. I moved 409 00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:29,320 Speaker 1: out when she was not home and haven't even heard 410 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:33,040 Speaker 1: from her since it was random, out of the blue, 411 00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:37,760 Speaker 1: and I thought everything was perfectly fine. What advice do 412 00:26:37,840 --> 00:26:41,480 Speaker 1: you give me to help me get through this? Why 413 00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:43,359 Speaker 1: do you think she would just want to disappear like 414 00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:47,360 Speaker 1: a ghost from me without any conversation or communication? And 415 00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:53,879 Speaker 1: what advice do you give for this? I'm trying to 416 00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:59,680 Speaker 1: first of all, Brandon, he's twenty three, doesn't say where 417 00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:03,320 Speaker 1: he's from, and I'm trying to understand this one part 418 00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:08,240 Speaker 1: where it says I moved out. I bought it. My 419 00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:09,720 Speaker 1: girlfriend over a year and a half broke up with 420 00:27:09,760 --> 00:27:12,479 Speaker 1: me over a text message weeks after I bought an 421 00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:15,040 Speaker 1: engagement ring and will not talk to me or even 422 00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:18,840 Speaker 1: respond to me in any form. I moved out when 423 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:22,000 Speaker 1: she was not home and haven't even heard from her 424 00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 1: since does she Does he mean she moved out? I'm 425 00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:30,719 Speaker 1: trying to figure follow that. Okay, well, let me address 426 00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:36,440 Speaker 1: that first. I can go either way either scenario. Man, 427 00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:42,320 Speaker 1: guys don't live with her, don't don't live with their 428 00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:47,919 Speaker 1: guys and girls don't live with them. Even if that 429 00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:52,360 Speaker 1: means you're saving a ton of money an apartment, even 430 00:27:52,440 --> 00:27:56,879 Speaker 1: if that means that you're getting a discount from your landlord, 431 00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:59,760 Speaker 1: what whatever. Even if that means they're they're from out 432 00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:03,639 Speaker 1: of ten and you're trying to make it convenient, it's 433 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:06,680 Speaker 1: just going to create problems. It's going to create problems. 434 00:28:06,880 --> 00:28:12,800 Speaker 1: So she ghosted you after a year and a half 435 00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:16,640 Speaker 1: after you bought an engagement ring. She will not talk 436 00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:21,240 Speaker 1: to you or respond First of all, that is a 437 00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:25,679 Speaker 1: clear message. She doesn't respond to you, is a clear 438 00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:31,040 Speaker 1: message that you need to move on. That doesn't That 439 00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:35,080 Speaker 1: doesn't mean there's a window of opportunity for me to 440 00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:39,480 Speaker 1: keep messaging her. Maybe Facebook, maybe she'll check Facebook this time, 441 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,440 Speaker 1: or maybe maybe it's an email thing like, or she 442 00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:45,040 Speaker 1: wants to just Okay, maybe she wants me to show 443 00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:49,239 Speaker 1: up at her work because women I've seen movies and 444 00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:53,000 Speaker 1: girls like girls like men that pursue them. So I'm 445 00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,840 Speaker 1: going to show up at two am when she's getting 446 00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:58,720 Speaker 1: off off of her waitress job at the end the 447 00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:04,040 Speaker 1: parking lot at dark. No, don't do that. She is 448 00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:08,600 Speaker 1: fully aware, fully aware that you are reaching out to 449 00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:12,000 Speaker 1: her and trying to get a hold of her. Humans 450 00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:15,040 Speaker 1: these days, it is no longer an excuse. They see 451 00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:17,480 Speaker 1: their phones, they see the text going off, they see 452 00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:20,360 Speaker 1: the phone calls, they see the email and the Facebook 453 00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:25,800 Speaker 1: messages and the Instagram whatever. They see you. So it 454 00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:33,240 Speaker 1: only takes one and you've done that. Okay. Good news 455 00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:35,120 Speaker 1: is you've got an engagement ring that you could now 456 00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:38,840 Speaker 1: either return or sell. They're going to hold their value. Okay, 457 00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:46,360 Speaker 1: but don't don't hold on to her anymore. It's time 458 00:29:46,400 --> 00:29:51,040 Speaker 1: to let her go. Do I know why she ghosted you? No? 459 00:29:51,160 --> 00:29:54,680 Speaker 1: I don't know why, but there's many reasons why it 460 00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:59,640 Speaker 1: could be, and you not being good enough for her 461 00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:03,240 Speaker 1: is not something in your consideration. It doesn't matter, it 462 00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:12,120 Speaker 1: doesn't matter. You're young, you're twenty three, perfect perfect. This 463 00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:15,880 Speaker 1: message is different if you're fifty three, right, just different 464 00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:18,400 Speaker 1: if you're forty three, but you're twenty three. You have 465 00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:21,640 Speaker 1: a great job, you have a college degree. You dated 466 00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:24,480 Speaker 1: this girl for a year and a half so much 467 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:26,120 Speaker 1: so you liked her so much that you wanted to 468 00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:29,040 Speaker 1: get an engagement ring. You did, and you lived with her. 469 00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:36,360 Speaker 1: Pumped the brakes, she's gone. That's okay. It seems like 470 00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:38,280 Speaker 1: the end of the world, But there's going to be 471 00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:43,440 Speaker 1: another and the next one will be better because you 472 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:47,600 Speaker 1: will have learned you're better in a relationship. You have 473 00:30:47,640 --> 00:30:51,680 Speaker 1: more to give, You have a better quality product to 474 00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:56,200 Speaker 1: give the next relationship because of what you learn from 475 00:30:56,200 --> 00:31:00,680 Speaker 1: the previous relationship. Does that make sense? Like you you're 476 00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:05,480 Speaker 1: a better you're better package now to present because because 477 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:12,320 Speaker 1: you have been refined through the fire in a bad relationship. Now, 478 00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:14,400 Speaker 1: we don't want to go out and seek bad relationships 479 00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:18,280 Speaker 1: to help refine us. That's not the purpose. But as 480 00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:22,840 Speaker 1: anything in life, as we as we're broken down, whether 481 00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:26,840 Speaker 1: it's in the gym or whether it's whether it's in 482 00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:30,800 Speaker 1: our career, but when we meet setbacks in adversity and 483 00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:35,719 Speaker 1: we overcome them and we're broken down, then as humans, 484 00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:39,600 Speaker 1: we grow back better, sometimes in the form of learning 485 00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:46,120 Speaker 1: or resilience in the gym, muscles, whatever. But through a 486 00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:52,080 Speaker 1: break up you build back better. It's interesting that it's 487 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:56,080 Speaker 1: called a break up, right because it breaks you down, 488 00:31:56,920 --> 00:32:01,760 Speaker 1: not up. It breaks you down, and then from breaking 489 00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:06,440 Speaker 1: down you build up better and you're better for the 490 00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:10,720 Speaker 1: next person. Lucky for the next person. If you date 491 00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:15,960 Speaker 1: someone that's had a couple bad relationships, good for you. 492 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:20,120 Speaker 1: You get to receive the benefits, hopefully of the fruits 493 00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:25,240 Speaker 1: that they've learned from the breakdown. I don't know why 494 00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:27,280 Speaker 1: they call it break up. It should be breakdown. They 495 00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:33,440 Speaker 1: broke you down. So all this I say to you, Brandon, 496 00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:38,320 Speaker 1: as an encouragement, I say this is encouragement that you, 497 00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:40,800 Speaker 1: although you might not see it because you're in the fire, 498 00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:46,920 Speaker 1: you're in the breakdown phase, will build back better and 499 00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:49,360 Speaker 1: you're gonna be better because of it, and you're gonna 500 00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:53,320 Speaker 1: have more to offer and you have learned, first of all, 501 00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:57,040 Speaker 1: don't live with her and don't spend too much on 502 00:32:57,040 --> 00:33:04,200 Speaker 1: that engagement. Thanks for your question, brother, All right, well 503 00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:06,840 Speaker 1: let's uh, man, I have no idea what these say. 504 00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:13,000 Speaker 1: I'm going totally blind. I'm gonna hit this one. This 505 00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:17,800 Speaker 1: says question, Hey Granger, me and my wife got married 506 00:33:17,800 --> 00:33:22,840 Speaker 1: in January, and I feel like we have lost our connection. 507 00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:26,840 Speaker 1: We used to do a lot with each other, but 508 00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,240 Speaker 1: now we just sit at home and do nothing. I 509 00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:32,520 Speaker 1: feel like we've lost something. Thank you for your time 510 00:33:32,680 --> 00:33:39,080 Speaker 1: and keep doing the things you're doing, Alex. Alex, let 511 00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:41,480 Speaker 1: me reiterate. Let me see what you got here. You're 512 00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:45,400 Speaker 1: saying you and your wife got married in January. This 513 00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:50,000 Speaker 1: message came on Thursday, meaning that's this is current. So 514 00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:52,600 Speaker 1: you are you haven't even hit the one year mark, 515 00:33:52,760 --> 00:33:59,080 Speaker 1: so you lost your connection. This is this is not Alex. 516 00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:04,640 Speaker 1: This is not devastating news. Yeah, I'm sure you've heard 517 00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:06,360 Speaker 1: a lot of people. Maybe people told you in your 518 00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:09,759 Speaker 1: engagement or on your wedding day. Even I bet you 519 00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:12,600 Speaker 1: people told you. Remember, the first year is the hardest. 520 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:20,080 Speaker 1: And the reason they say that is because of you're 521 00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:23,960 Speaker 1: getting all these first you know, and you're learning the 522 00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:29,280 Speaker 1: person more than you ever did, and so it becomes harder, 523 00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:35,640 Speaker 1: so that the first year. I think you need to 524 00:34:35,680 --> 00:34:39,840 Speaker 1: reevaluate this question after January, after the one year is 525 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:43,680 Speaker 1: completely done. From when I'm reading this podcast, it's still November. 526 00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:47,520 Speaker 1: So you've been in You've been in this about ten 527 00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:52,520 Speaker 1: plus months, so that that's the good news. That's where 528 00:34:52,520 --> 00:34:57,960 Speaker 1: I'll start. But then secondly, if you feel like you've 529 00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:02,160 Speaker 1: lost a connection with your wife now, I don't know 530 00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:04,920 Speaker 1: anything else about you or her, or your age, or 531 00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:09,360 Speaker 1: where you live, or if there's kids involved yet, but 532 00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:17,640 Speaker 1: your wife is your first priority after God right now 533 00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:24,680 Speaker 1: and she always will be until you die. That's what 534 00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:33,440 Speaker 1: marriage is. Don't underestimate what marriage is or what she 535 00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:40,680 Speaker 1: is to you. Don't underestimate that for the rest of 536 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:45,359 Speaker 1: your life. That's a commitment you made. That's the value made, 537 00:35:46,120 --> 00:35:48,960 Speaker 1: and that's what marriage means. So if you're listening to 538 00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,880 Speaker 1: this podcast on the other side of this conversation, and 539 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:56,960 Speaker 1: you're dating and you don't see the possibility of the 540 00:35:56,960 --> 00:35:59,719 Speaker 1: person you're dating being in this role with you where 541 00:35:59,760 --> 00:36:04,600 Speaker 1: they're first after God, then you should probably break up 542 00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:08,160 Speaker 1: with that person. Should probably break up with the person 543 00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:15,040 Speaker 1: in the relationship with you. That's not that But this 544 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:17,680 Speaker 1: is a different story for you, Alex, because you're in it. 545 00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:23,520 Speaker 1: We heard on this podcast Brent last week say love 546 00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:27,920 Speaker 1: is a verb. Love is a verb. I love that 547 00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:32,080 Speaker 1: some of you might have heard that before, and you've 548 00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:36,480 Speaker 1: also heard me say love is a decision. Sometimes in 549 00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:40,560 Speaker 1: this culture we start to feel like love is something 550 00:36:40,680 --> 00:36:46,920 Speaker 1: like fairy dust that just falls on us, and we 551 00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:50,759 Speaker 1: confuse it with infatuation. That's what infatuation is. When you're 552 00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:54,920 Speaker 1: all your pheromones or whatever, you start bubbling up and 553 00:36:54,960 --> 00:36:57,399 Speaker 1: you just get this feeling like, oh my gosh, this 554 00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:01,160 Speaker 1: is it. This is the one, you know. That's that 555 00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:05,480 Speaker 1: phase of infatuation that goes away. We all have to 556 00:37:05,520 --> 00:37:10,160 Speaker 1: be aware that it goes away. But love is stronger 557 00:37:10,200 --> 00:37:16,200 Speaker 1: and deeper and last a lot longer. And it's a 558 00:37:16,320 --> 00:37:20,560 Speaker 1: verb meaning you do it. You actively do love. You 559 00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:25,759 Speaker 1: actively love, You pour out love, and usually what you 560 00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:28,719 Speaker 1: pour out you get back, not in all cases, but 561 00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:32,360 Speaker 1: in a lot of cases, and a pretty good chance 562 00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:35,200 Speaker 1: that you will. You you out poor love, you act 563 00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:40,600 Speaker 1: it out, and you get in return love. It's also 564 00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:44,840 Speaker 1: a decision. Love is a mental decision. We want to 565 00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,400 Speaker 1: feel like it's the heart and the gut and like 566 00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:51,120 Speaker 1: I feel it, my stomach in it just like turns 567 00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:54,560 Speaker 1: me and it's love. Oh my goodness, it's love. But 568 00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:59,799 Speaker 1: you can't confuse that within the infatuation because so many 569 00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:04,359 Speaker 1: times that will fade away, and your gut will lead 570 00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:08,520 Speaker 1: you somewhere else. Your gut will take you down down 571 00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:10,640 Speaker 1: the street and see someone else, and you'll get that 572 00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:14,520 Speaker 1: gut twist like wow, that girl, look at that guy. Whatever. 573 00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:20,040 Speaker 1: But love is different, it's deeper, it's stronger than that, 574 00:38:20,719 --> 00:38:24,520 Speaker 1: and it comes from a decision in the brain to go, 575 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:28,640 Speaker 1: you know what. I love this girl. I remember that 576 00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:31,759 Speaker 1: infatuation I had when I first saw her, and she 577 00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:36,719 Speaker 1: has not changed somewhere deep down in her. She is 578 00:38:36,800 --> 00:38:40,440 Speaker 1: that person I saw and she's beautiful the same way 579 00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:43,839 Speaker 1: that I was attracted to her. And I will make 580 00:38:43,880 --> 00:38:46,400 Speaker 1: a decision to love her, and I will make a 581 00:38:46,440 --> 00:38:51,200 Speaker 1: decision to use love as a verb. Meaning in your question, Alex, 582 00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:53,200 Speaker 1: you say we used to do a lot of things, 583 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:56,120 Speaker 1: but now we just sit at home. That means you 584 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,719 Speaker 1: make a decision and go, you know what. I'm not 585 00:38:58,880 --> 00:39:01,799 Speaker 1: going to sit at home anymore. I'm gonna make a 586 00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:05,200 Speaker 1: decision to make love a verb and act it out 587 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:08,160 Speaker 1: with my young wife that we've only been married for 588 00:39:08,200 --> 00:39:12,680 Speaker 1: ten months together. Hey babe, I got something for you 589 00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:17,600 Speaker 1: Wednesday night. I got reservations downtown. We're gonna go down 590 00:39:17,680 --> 00:39:20,560 Speaker 1: there and then and then when she gets in the car, 591 00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:25,520 Speaker 1: you got flowers for her. You rekindle that and you say, babe, 592 00:39:25,560 --> 00:39:28,560 Speaker 1: get dressed up, I'm taking you downtown. We're going Wednesday 593 00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:33,879 Speaker 1: reservations are seven point thirty. You act it out. You say, hey, 594 00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:36,840 Speaker 1: on your way home from work, you're driving home and 595 00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:40,120 Speaker 1: you're thinking, it's Tuesday night. I'm about to repeat what 596 00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:42,040 Speaker 1: I do every night. We're gonna go in there and 597 00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:45,400 Speaker 1: we're gonna sit on our phones at home and do nothing. No, 598 00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:49,200 Speaker 1: I'm changing that. You go to the pet store on 599 00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:50,719 Speaker 1: your way home from work and you pick up a 600 00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:54,360 Speaker 1: puppy and you walk in and go, look, babe, a puppy. 601 00:39:55,320 --> 00:39:58,320 Speaker 1: I'm just throwing this out there, but there's a million 602 00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:01,360 Speaker 1: ideas A puppy and I got, and we're gonna me 603 00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,160 Speaker 1: and you, we're gonna go and we're gonna we're gonna 604 00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:09,120 Speaker 1: start camping, and we're gonna we're gonna go to the 605 00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:11,480 Speaker 1: the mountains and wherever you live. I don't know where 606 00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:15,000 Speaker 1: you live, and we're gonna take this puppy and we're 607 00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:19,440 Speaker 1: gonna we're gonna teach it to swim in the creek 608 00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:23,680 Speaker 1: like Earl Dibbles Junior swimming in the creek with the 609 00:40:23,680 --> 00:40:26,439 Speaker 1: bird dog. Hey, Alex, there's a lot of options here, 610 00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:29,920 Speaker 1: but you will do nothing, and this will fizzle away, 611 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:33,400 Speaker 1: and this will die if you sit at home and 612 00:40:33,480 --> 00:40:36,439 Speaker 1: lose this connection. But you have a decision to make 613 00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:39,279 Speaker 1: in your mind, not your gut, not your heart. The 614 00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:44,040 Speaker 1: Bible says your heart is deceitful, it is infinitely wicked, 615 00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:47,879 Speaker 1: and your gut cannot be trusted. Do we not know this? 616 00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:51,400 Speaker 1: We know this? The gut camp You can't trust your gut. 617 00:40:51,640 --> 00:40:53,440 Speaker 1: People want to say that all the time. Just trust 618 00:40:53,440 --> 00:40:59,959 Speaker 1: your gut. It's whimsical. It comes and goes. You chase 619 00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:03,880 Speaker 1: it all day long like a dog chasing his tail. Eventually, 620 00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:09,120 Speaker 1: you have to make decisions and follow your brain. You 621 00:41:09,160 --> 00:41:12,480 Speaker 1: have to follow your brain and make educated decisions based 622 00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:17,040 Speaker 1: on information that you've collected. Your brain is an incredible thing. 623 00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:21,919 Speaker 1: So the gut might get you there, it might might 624 00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:24,080 Speaker 1: start the spark, it might get you in the infatuation. 625 00:41:24,160 --> 00:41:30,800 Speaker 1: But love eventually becomes governed by your brain. So today 626 00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:33,239 Speaker 1: you start. Today you hear this podcast, Alex, you go, 627 00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:37,320 Speaker 1: I will no longer sit at home and do nothing 628 00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:40,759 Speaker 1: with my with my wife and she I'm not going 629 00:41:40,840 --> 00:41:43,080 Speaker 1: to wait for her to make this kind of decision, 630 00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:48,440 Speaker 1: because maybe she won't come to this conclusion, but you will. Wives, 631 00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:50,080 Speaker 1: if you're listening to this and you're in the same 632 00:41:50,120 --> 00:41:54,040 Speaker 1: situation from the reverse, don't wait on your husband. One 633 00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:57,480 Speaker 1: of you two needs to act now, and don't look 634 00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:59,719 Speaker 1: at it as if he ain't gonna act, I ain't 635 00:41:59,719 --> 00:42:02,800 Speaker 1: gonna act. Don't look at it because it might not happen. 636 00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:05,880 Speaker 1: Who's going to start at first? You might lose this marriage. 637 00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:08,840 Speaker 1: People are so quick to give up on it. I 638 00:42:08,840 --> 00:42:12,879 Speaker 1: think I've said enough, Alex, But but act on this. 639 00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:17,520 Speaker 1: Do it now. They say the first year is the hardest. 640 00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:20,120 Speaker 1: I get it, But that doesn't mean you don't waste 641 00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:24,680 Speaker 1: this opportunity now to get this fire going again. Don't 642 00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:26,440 Speaker 1: let it get down to Embers and go out on you. 643 00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:39,239 Speaker 1: All right, let's go to I'm just going on the 644 00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:41,040 Speaker 1: list here, guys, That's what I'm doing. If you got 645 00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:45,800 Speaker 1: an email, send me one at Grangersmith podcast at gmail 646 00:42:45,800 --> 00:42:48,360 Speaker 1: dot com with your question. I'm just going to go 647 00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:53,160 Speaker 1: down these It says, Hey, Granger I'm Daniel from Indiana. 648 00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:55,680 Speaker 1: I have a few things I need help with. Number One, 649 00:42:56,320 --> 00:42:58,239 Speaker 1: my grandpa passed away a few years ago, and I'm 650 00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:01,520 Speaker 1: still struggling with it to the point that it's hurting 651 00:43:01,600 --> 00:43:04,960 Speaker 1: some of my relationships. And I don't want it to 652 00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:12,400 Speaker 1: be I don't want I there's a couple of misspellings, Sorry, Daniel. 653 00:43:13,960 --> 00:43:18,680 Speaker 1: I don't want it to do. I don't want it 654 00:43:18,680 --> 00:43:21,160 Speaker 1: to mess up my piece. I'll paraphrase it for you. 655 00:43:21,400 --> 00:43:24,400 Speaker 1: Number two, my girlfriend will be leaving for college in 656 00:43:24,440 --> 00:43:26,799 Speaker 1: a few months and I will be staying home, and 657 00:43:26,880 --> 00:43:28,520 Speaker 1: I don't want her to go. I know it's for 658 00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:32,120 Speaker 1: the best. I'm afraid of what this impact might have 659 00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:35,400 Speaker 1: on our relationship. I don't want it to end. I 660 00:43:35,440 --> 00:43:38,279 Speaker 1: don't know if I could handle the drive to see 661 00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:40,799 Speaker 1: her with my work schedule in the distance. She's my rock. 662 00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:44,719 Speaker 1: I don't know what to do without her. She has 663 00:43:44,719 --> 00:43:47,040 Speaker 1: helped me through so much of this difficult time in 664 00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:49,719 Speaker 1: my life. How do you deal with distance between you 665 00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,000 Speaker 1: and your wife and when your family is on the road. 666 00:43:53,120 --> 00:43:56,359 Speaker 1: What could I do? Says I love your podcast, your 667 00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:59,279 Speaker 1: YouTube channel, and i've seen you live in concert and 668 00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:09,000 Speaker 1: Indiana and in Milwaukee. Wow, Dan, thanks for reaching out, brother. 669 00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:15,560 Speaker 1: I see a lot of over and over you're writing. 670 00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:18,080 Speaker 1: I don't want to I don't want to. I don't 671 00:44:18,120 --> 00:44:23,879 Speaker 1: want to, and I want to just encourage you through 672 00:44:23,920 --> 00:44:30,280 Speaker 1: this that there there appears to be I'm no psychologist, 673 00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:35,480 Speaker 1: I'm no therapist, but there appear to be deeper issues 674 00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:38,600 Speaker 1: in your questions. And I love your brothers is coming 675 00:44:38,600 --> 00:44:43,440 Speaker 1: out of love? Right? You have a number one and 676 00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:45,400 Speaker 1: number two. Number one your grandpa passed away and you're 677 00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:49,520 Speaker 1: still not over it. Number two your girlfriend's leaving for 678 00:44:49,560 --> 00:44:52,439 Speaker 1: college in a few months and you're staying at home. 679 00:44:55,080 --> 00:44:57,480 Speaker 1: Let's go, let's dive into each one. What number one 680 00:44:57,520 --> 00:45:05,440 Speaker 1: your grandpa? This might be hurting your girlfriend relationship too. 681 00:45:05,480 --> 00:45:07,960 Speaker 1: You you admitted it that this might be hurting your 682 00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:13,200 Speaker 1: relationships because you can't let go. Hey, a few years, 683 00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:19,319 Speaker 1: let me let me be blunt. A few years is 684 00:45:19,440 --> 00:45:25,680 Speaker 1: too long to be actively hurting after losing your grandpa. 685 00:45:26,480 --> 00:45:30,160 Speaker 1: Some of you might go, what, No, it has nothing 686 00:45:30,200 --> 00:45:32,400 Speaker 1: to do with your love. Okay, there's nothing to do 687 00:45:32,440 --> 00:45:37,359 Speaker 1: with your your love. And you know I lost I've 688 00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:42,719 Speaker 1: lost two grandpa's. Loved my grandpa's. I lost them. I 689 00:45:42,800 --> 00:45:46,200 Speaker 1: miss them. I think about them all the time. I 690 00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:49,400 Speaker 1: wish that I could have a conversation with one of 691 00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:53,520 Speaker 1: my two grandpas about something, usually World War two. I 692 00:45:53,520 --> 00:45:58,480 Speaker 1: I wish I could have conversations about that, but that 693 00:45:58,560 --> 00:46:01,400 Speaker 1: doesn't that doesn't mean then I'm struggling with it. And 694 00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:04,120 Speaker 1: so if you're struggling with it, you need to put 695 00:46:04,160 --> 00:46:06,640 Speaker 1: this to bed. You have to put this to rest, 696 00:46:07,280 --> 00:46:11,600 Speaker 1: because because the one thing we know for sure in 697 00:46:11,680 --> 00:46:16,920 Speaker 1: life his grandpas are going to die. Right, do I 698 00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:19,279 Speaker 1: need to say that again? The one thing we know 699 00:46:19,360 --> 00:46:21,479 Speaker 1: for sure in life is that grandpas are going to die. 700 00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:27,040 Speaker 1: Sounds like a bad country song, but most of us, 701 00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:31,120 Speaker 1: ninety nine percent of us on this earth will lose 702 00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:35,279 Speaker 1: our grandpa's because that's the cycle of life. So so 703 00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:37,840 Speaker 1: we need to look back at Grandpa at the life 704 00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:41,640 Speaker 1: that he lived, and we need those memories of what 705 00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:43,520 Speaker 1: he taught us and how he lived and who he 706 00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:47,640 Speaker 1: was as a great person. We need those memories to 707 00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:51,680 Speaker 1: make a smile. Now after two years, I'm not talking 708 00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:55,319 Speaker 1: about the first few months, but after two years, we 709 00:46:55,360 --> 00:46:58,680 Speaker 1: need those memories to make us smile and not make 710 00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:05,560 Speaker 1: us struggle and grieve and cry and hurt. So it's 711 00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:08,520 Speaker 1: time to go to his graveside and have a conversation 712 00:47:08,640 --> 00:47:10,760 Speaker 1: with that cold stone. You're not gonna have a conversation 713 00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:13,960 Speaker 1: with him. I don't believe that that's possible, but you 714 00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,400 Speaker 1: need to have a covert conversation with that cold stone 715 00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:21,640 Speaker 1: and go, you know what this represents. Once again, I'm 716 00:47:21,680 --> 00:47:25,440 Speaker 1: not I am so against talking to dead. I'm so 717 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:28,760 Speaker 1: against that, and I could feel the emails clicking against 718 00:47:28,760 --> 00:47:33,760 Speaker 1: me right now. But the Bible said that the dead 719 00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:37,160 Speaker 1: have no business on earth anymore. So you're not talking 720 00:47:37,160 --> 00:47:39,000 Speaker 1: to him. But I want you to go talk to 721 00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:42,759 Speaker 1: that ground and that stone and just say what this represents. 722 00:47:43,239 --> 00:47:46,640 Speaker 1: In this ground and this stone, in this cemetery where 723 00:47:46,680 --> 00:47:52,719 Speaker 1: I once stood for this funeral. I am gonna from 724 00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:56,719 Speaker 1: here on look at this memory and look at the 725 00:47:56,800 --> 00:48:00,920 Speaker 1: legacy of my grandpa. It's a good thing, something that 726 00:48:00,960 --> 00:48:05,280 Speaker 1: makes me smile, something that made me the man I am. 727 00:48:05,560 --> 00:48:07,839 Speaker 1: And I'm gonna be strong for him. And I'm gonna 728 00:48:07,840 --> 00:48:09,319 Speaker 1: take what he taught me and I'm gonna teach it 729 00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:13,520 Speaker 1: to the world and my future kids and my nieces 730 00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:16,440 Speaker 1: and nephews and friends around me. I'm gonna bring in 731 00:48:16,480 --> 00:48:19,279 Speaker 1: those old sayings that Grandpa said. I'm gonna show him 732 00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:21,920 Speaker 1: how to work on the truck like Grandpa did. I'm 733 00:48:21,920 --> 00:48:24,200 Speaker 1: gonna show him how to swing a hammer like my grandpa. 734 00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:27,960 Speaker 1: But I'm not gonna let it drag me down because 735 00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:32,399 Speaker 1: that's not what he would want in his legacy. Number two, 736 00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:39,319 Speaker 1: your girlfriend. You are too attached to her. You are 737 00:48:39,360 --> 00:48:42,400 Speaker 1: too Let me say it again. You are too attached 738 00:48:42,760 --> 00:48:48,360 Speaker 1: to her, Daniel, You cannot say she this is your quote, 739 00:48:48,760 --> 00:48:51,600 Speaker 1: she is my rock. I don't know what I will 740 00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:57,719 Speaker 1: do without her. Boom problem, red flag. You are too 741 00:48:57,840 --> 00:49:01,920 Speaker 1: attached to her. Hey, guys, I can't even say that 742 00:49:01,960 --> 00:49:06,160 Speaker 1: about Amber. She is my rock. I don't know what 743 00:49:06,239 --> 00:49:10,239 Speaker 1: I will do without her. What happens if I lose her? 744 00:49:10,280 --> 00:49:16,160 Speaker 1: And I've said that, I'm screwed. My kids are ruined. 745 00:49:17,520 --> 00:49:21,640 Speaker 1: Daddy is looney. He has lost his mind. Why because 746 00:49:21,640 --> 00:49:23,880 Speaker 1: he lost his rock and he didn't know what he 747 00:49:23,920 --> 00:49:25,480 Speaker 1: was going to do without her, and then he lost her, 748 00:49:25,760 --> 00:49:29,879 Speaker 1: and guess what, he doesn't know what to do. That's 749 00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:31,480 Speaker 1: a bad thing. You see what I'm saying. It's a 750 00:49:31,480 --> 00:49:36,800 Speaker 1: bad thing. The only person you could say this about 751 00:49:36,880 --> 00:49:40,400 Speaker 1: is God, and this would echo something you'd read in 752 00:49:40,440 --> 00:49:43,719 Speaker 1: the Psalms by David God. You're my rock, You're my 753 00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:49,560 Speaker 1: refuge for salvation paraphrase. I don't know what I would 754 00:49:49,600 --> 00:49:53,920 Speaker 1: do without you, because guess what, You'll never lose him. 755 00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:57,800 Speaker 1: He is always here for you. He is your rock, 756 00:49:58,680 --> 00:50:01,719 Speaker 1: and you have to rearrange your thoughts that way. It 757 00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:04,640 Speaker 1: has to be that way, because if she replaces God, 758 00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:07,120 Speaker 1: if she becomes your idol in this and that's what 759 00:50:07,160 --> 00:50:09,759 Speaker 1: it is. It's idolatry to think of your girlfriend as 760 00:50:09,760 --> 00:50:11,399 Speaker 1: your rock and you don't know what you do without her. 761 00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:14,239 Speaker 1: These words might be coming across harsh, but they are 762 00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:18,480 Speaker 1: so true. And there's evidence in all the emails I've 763 00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:21,759 Speaker 1: read over the last couple of years that show you 764 00:50:22,200 --> 00:50:25,799 Speaker 1: that the result of what you're doing is eventually she's 765 00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:30,520 Speaker 1: gonna leave you or die, or you're gonna fall out 766 00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:34,040 Speaker 1: of love, and you're going to change your mind or 767 00:50:34,160 --> 00:50:38,040 Speaker 1: your gut, and then you're gonna go. She was my 768 00:50:38,160 --> 00:50:40,360 Speaker 1: rock and I didn't know what to do without her, 769 00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:45,440 Speaker 1: and now I'm lost. Now I'm lost. So you have 770 00:50:45,520 --> 00:50:48,680 Speaker 1: to fix that. And guess what a good way to 771 00:50:48,719 --> 00:50:51,880 Speaker 1: fix this is, Daniel. She's leaving for college in a 772 00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:54,920 Speaker 1: few months. It sounds like a good time for a 773 00:50:54,920 --> 00:50:59,120 Speaker 1: little space, a little break, little distance might do you good. 774 00:50:59,200 --> 00:51:03,080 Speaker 1: It should, and so I would use this time to 775 00:51:03,200 --> 00:51:08,560 Speaker 1: go Hey, Babe, you're going away. I'm starting a new 776 00:51:08,760 --> 00:51:12,120 Speaker 1: hobby or taking on an extra job, or I'm gonna 777 00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:15,560 Speaker 1: I'm gonna really pour some of my pour some of 778 00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:20,200 Speaker 1: this time and effort into my buddies, my guy friends here, 779 00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:25,320 Speaker 1: and we're gonna we're gonna do a lot more fishing 780 00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:33,440 Speaker 1: now and it and see where this goes. Maybe maybe 781 00:51:33,440 --> 00:51:36,160 Speaker 1: she says, you know, Babe, I was gone for two 782 00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:37,880 Speaker 1: months in college and I just can't stand to be 783 00:51:37,920 --> 00:51:41,120 Speaker 1: away from you. And that says something about the relationship. 784 00:51:42,520 --> 00:51:45,239 Speaker 1: But the bottom line, you have to work yourself. You 785 00:51:45,320 --> 00:51:48,480 Speaker 1: have to work this out with She's my rock. I 786 00:51:48,480 --> 00:51:50,239 Speaker 1: don't know what I'd do without her. She has helped 787 00:51:50,280 --> 00:51:53,399 Speaker 1: me through so many difficult things in my life. You're 788 00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:58,800 Speaker 1: setting yourself up for really bad news and really crushing heartbreak. 789 00:52:00,640 --> 00:52:03,880 Speaker 1: People that listen right now or they know I mean, 790 00:52:03,920 --> 00:52:06,840 Speaker 1: I've just read a question earlier. Is that the result 791 00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:09,560 Speaker 1: of this kind of idolatry for your girlfriend or your 792 00:52:09,560 --> 00:52:13,319 Speaker 1: boyfriend or your kids. Your kids could be this kind 793 00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:16,040 Speaker 1: of idol. You can't look at your kids and go 794 00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,560 Speaker 1: they are my rock. I don't know what I would 795 00:52:19,600 --> 00:52:26,120 Speaker 1: do without them. Be careful with that that's coming from 796 00:52:26,120 --> 00:52:30,279 Speaker 1: a guy that's lost his child. Be careful with that. 797 00:52:34,320 --> 00:52:44,240 Speaker 1: You're setting yourself up for a devastation beyond understanding. Don't 798 00:52:44,800 --> 00:52:52,279 Speaker 1: hear me wrong, y'all. This is not about loving your 799 00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:59,400 Speaker 1: family less. It's not about loving your family or your friends, 800 00:52:59,600 --> 00:53:04,960 Speaker 1: or your girlfriend or your boyfriend less. It's about loving 801 00:53:05,440 --> 00:53:21,040 Speaker 1: God that much more. I appreciate y'all for listening. That's 802 00:53:21,080 --> 00:53:24,320 Speaker 1: all we have today. We will see you next Monday. 803 00:53:25,040 --> 00:53:28,320 Speaker 1: Thank you for listening. Thank you for following this journey. 804 00:53:29,160 --> 00:53:32,920 Speaker 1: If you have a question for me, email Grangersmith Podcast 805 00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:35,680 Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. I will love to answer it. 806 00:53:36,320 --> 00:53:39,319 Speaker 1: We'll see y'all next week. Gee, thanks for joining me 807 00:53:39,360 --> 00:53:42,600 Speaker 1: on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate all of you. Guys. 808 00:53:42,640 --> 00:53:45,560 Speaker 1: You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. 809 00:53:45,840 --> 00:53:48,920 Speaker 1: If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel. Hit that 810 00:53:48,960 --> 00:53:52,000 Speaker 1: little like button and the notification spell so that you 811 00:53:52,160 --> 00:53:55,759 Speaker 1: never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have 812 00:53:55,800 --> 00:53:57,880 Speaker 1: a question for me that you would like me to answer, 813 00:53:58,280 --> 00:54:10,360 Speaker 1: email granger Smith Cast at gmail dot com. Ye m HM.