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Speaker 1: Welcome back.

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Speaker 2: It's a brand new episode. This is Laugh with Me,

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Speaker 2: a podcast with Jeremy Oh buye y'all. J O, welcome

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Speaker 2: to episode one hundred and eleven.

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Speaker 1: Johnny, that's that's pretty good. That's say. I say that's

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Speaker 1: pretty good.

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Speaker 2: Stack that up there with one of the good things

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Speaker 2: that happened today. I just sometimes when you get a

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Speaker 2: couple of wins, you want to share them with the people, okay,

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Speaker 2: because it's just it's no fun to score a win

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Speaker 2: and then nobody knows about it, especially when it's wins

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Speaker 2: like this, Okay, not episode one eleven. I mean, that's

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Speaker 2: exciting for Johnny. Johnny, good job, buddy. You were here

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Speaker 2: for what a hundred of those close to one hundred, right,

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Speaker 2: We're not celebrating your one hundred yet either way, Johnny,

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Speaker 2: we're at one eleven. Congratulations.

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Speaker 1: Not today today.

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Speaker 2: I uh, you know, rolled up to the old hospital

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Speaker 2: as one does, having uh, having some blood taken, having

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Speaker 2: having it checked out a little bit.

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Speaker 1: See how the irons sitting.

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Speaker 2: And you might be saying, man, Jo sounds like he's

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Speaker 2: got that pep in his step. He must be full

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Speaker 2: of iron. He must be rocking and rolling right now.

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Speaker 2: That new Medsie's on work. It no not necessarily see

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Speaker 2: what happened is is I I was like, I went

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Speaker 2: to have it checked because I am, in fact probably

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Speaker 2: pretty well and.

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Speaker 1: All the needed things to keep going.

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Speaker 2: But as I'm at the desk, you know, talking to

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Speaker 2: the I don't even know what the reception whoever it

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Speaker 2: is doing the check in, you know, anymore. To verify

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Speaker 2: who you are, they need your name, they need your birthday,

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Speaker 2: sometimes they need your home address. But in this particular situation,

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Speaker 2: she asked for my birthday. So I give her my

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Speaker 2: birthday and she loudly goes, no way, And I thought, hey,

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Speaker 2: we have the same birthday or something. And I'm like, well, hey,

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Speaker 2: your birthday is in June and she's like, no, there

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Speaker 2: is no way that you were that old.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, what are you talking about?

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Speaker 2: And she's like, you do not look like you were

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Speaker 2: that old. And I'm like, hey, I'm gonna take this

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Speaker 2: win because I don't get that very often anymore.

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Speaker 1: I do.

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Speaker 2: I do believe my age is in fact catching up

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Speaker 2: to me, and I don't get that. I used to

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Speaker 2: get that a lot, okay, especially in my thirties. My thirties,

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Speaker 2: I got it a lot where people thought I was

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Speaker 2: in my twenties, sometimes even younger, you know, getting id

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Speaker 2: left and right just boom boom boom. But you know anymore,

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Speaker 2: you know, I don't really get you so much of

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Speaker 2: that at all. Got it today, though, Take that as

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Speaker 2: a win. Always take that as a win. That's what

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Speaker 2: they said. Like with the having red hair, they always

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Speaker 2: said when I was younger, They're like, you're gonna you're

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Speaker 2: gonna get that lot when you're older. You people are

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Speaker 2: gonna say, oh, you look so young. It's just it's

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Speaker 2: in the jeans and something about the redheaded jeans. I

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Speaker 2: don't know. I don't know if that's the case or not.

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Speaker 2: But whatever else I've got going on, I know is

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Speaker 2: helping speed everything up to catch up so we are

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Speaker 2: in fact getting there.

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Speaker 1: I don't Maybe it's the beard. I don't know.

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Speaker 2: You know, this is gonna be a warm winter for

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Speaker 2: your boy. I started growing out my facial hair, got

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Speaker 2: I got a beard going. I've never been more warm outside.

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Speaker 2: And it's cold. Okay, it's like ten degrees or less

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Speaker 2: in the mornings. I think this afternoon. It was maybe

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Speaker 2: in the twenties. But I'll tell you what my face warm.

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Speaker 2: So first winter ever, I got the beard going, and

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Speaker 2: I'm wondering, should I have been doing this all? I

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Speaker 2: don't know take that as a win.

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Speaker 1: It could be.

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Speaker 2: It could very well be the beard covering up my

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Speaker 2: old man face. I think that's what it was, because

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Speaker 2: I don't have the gray or the white or whatever.

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Speaker 2: Maybe today, because I don't know always, maybe today I

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Speaker 2: had that life in my eyes and she was just like, man,

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Speaker 2: that guy's young. And then you know, I spit out

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Speaker 2: my age. It verified in the computer, and she's like,

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Speaker 2: no way, we're gonna give credit to the beard on

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Speaker 2: this one. But as life does, whenever you've got some

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Speaker 2: some monster wins like this, it tends to humble you.

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Speaker 2: And that's what happened not long after that, because I'm

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Speaker 2: waiting for tires. See I had an appointment today one

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Speaker 2: point thirty to get all new tires on my car.

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Speaker 2: My car desperately need tires, one Blue talked about a

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Speaker 2: couple weeks ago, one Blue. So I'm getting all these

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Speaker 2: new tires one thirty appointment today, But apparently not all

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Speaker 2: the tires were delivered. I you know, they said four tires.

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Speaker 2: Two of them have been delivered. Then there was some

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Speaker 2: talk of maybe we had three, so maybe they had

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Speaker 2: a rando around. I don't know, but either way, we're

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Speaker 2: waiting on two tires to be delivered for sure. And

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Speaker 2: did you know tires They don't come rolling in on

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Speaker 2: a truck, right, They get like delivered fed X or something,

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Speaker 2: at least at this place they did. Is they're waiting

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Speaker 2: on a FedEx delivery. I thought that was random. You

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Speaker 2: think they would just get like a truck that rolls

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Speaker 2: up and just drops off all their tires for him

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Speaker 2: for the week or something, a couple times a week,

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So so anyways, I'm waiting because they ate. They were like, hey,

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Speaker 2: it's FedEx truck. I'm waiting on the fext here any minute,

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Speaker 2: any minute. Spoiler, I still don't have my tires. But

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Speaker 2: as I'm waiting, I'm like, oh cool, I'll go walk

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Speaker 2: around like Target or something, you know. So I'm walking

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Speaker 2: around Target, and here's where life humbles you. I'm in

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Speaker 2: the back of the store, having the time in my

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Speaker 2: life just looking at stuff, just look at it stuff.

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Speaker 2: And uh, I had this instant urge that I was

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Speaker 2: going to shit myself and this is not something that

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Speaker 2: always happens. I think that's the one of the biggest

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Speaker 2: make misconceptions with somebody who has like Chrome's disease or colitis,

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Speaker 2: is that you're just constantly shitting yourself. This is that's

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Speaker 2: not true at all. Now, with that being said, does

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Speaker 2: it do you have that urge? Do you feel like

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Speaker 2: instant immediate, like it's going down. Sometimes yes, And I

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Speaker 2: know some people have a far worse than me, so

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Speaker 2: I'm very thankful for that. I'm gonna continue to fight

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Speaker 2: the good fight and hope that I could get into

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Speaker 2: remission and not have to deal with it to a deeper,

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Speaker 2: deeper into the crones world. But the thing is, sometimes yes,

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Speaker 2: the urge hits, and it's not like, oh, I'm gonna

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Speaker 2: hold it until I know. It's like I was dodging

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Speaker 2: people in aisles because I was it was like one

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Speaker 2: of those things where every step you take like a fart,

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Speaker 2: like it just they just start flying out. And I

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Speaker 2: was at a point where I knew if I didn't

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Speaker 2: get to the bathroom now, it was gonna be worse

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Speaker 2: than these little farts. So it was like I didn't

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Speaker 2: want to be embarrassed by ripping farts, by all these people.

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Speaker 2: But then at the same time, it would be worse,

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Speaker 2: It could get far worse. So what did I do, Johnny.

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Speaker 2: I went straight up to the bathroom. But here's what

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Speaker 2: I didn't anticipate. There was a guy in the back

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Speaker 2: of the store with these two kids in his cart,

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Speaker 2: and he's just he's on his phone. He's ran and

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Speaker 2: raven to his girl that he's having to keep the kids,

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Speaker 2: you know, entertained while she's doing whatever she's doing. And

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Speaker 2: so I just thought it was funny. I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 2: this guy, this poor guy, he's dealing with his kids.

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Speaker 2: And then I get up to the front, I'm gonna

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Speaker 2: shit myself, and who is rolling into the bathroom with

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Speaker 2: all his kids? That guy. So now I'm coming in

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Speaker 2: behind him with urgency. He goes into the last available stall.

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Speaker 2: So part of me is like, well, that sucks, because

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm going to be able to.

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Speaker 1: Like wait this one out.

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Speaker 2: But then the other part of me is like, I

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Speaker 2: may have dodged a bullet because if I had gotten

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Speaker 2: in there right before him, and I'm in there and

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Speaker 2: then and then I have to listen to him, you know,

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Speaker 2: ranting and raving in the echoes of the restroom, ay

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Speaker 2: Target that he can't use the I don't even know

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Speaker 2: who had to go?

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Speaker 1: Was it him, was the kids? I don't care.

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Speaker 2: I didn't stick around to find out. But what I

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Speaker 2: do know is I had I had to keep moving,

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Speaker 2: so I did a lap around the front end there

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Speaker 2: of the store.

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Speaker 1: Of the registers.

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Speaker 2: Us in the business, US in the industry, grocery industry,

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Speaker 2: we call that front end there with the regis, we

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Speaker 2: call it the front end. I don't know what the

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Speaker 2: new normies call it, but those of us in the business,

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Speaker 2: we call it the front end.

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Speaker 3: I did.

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Speaker 2: I did a quick lap around the registers there on

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Speaker 2: the front end, and then I still didn't see anybody

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Speaker 2: coming out of the bathroom. So then I do another

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Speaker 2: lat but this time I went. I went over by

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Speaker 2: the baseball cards because there's supposed to be this new

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Speaker 2: you know, not new series, but this series that I

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Speaker 2: really enjoy. It's supposed to be coming out here this

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Speaker 2: week for twenty twenty five, and I was like, Ah,

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Speaker 2: could we Target maybe have.

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Speaker 1: Have the new packs?

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Speaker 2: But no, they did not. So I roll back over

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Speaker 2: and I see the guy with his kids putting their

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Speaker 2: coats on, So they are out of the restaurant now,

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Speaker 2: so I roll in there oddly enough, whole place empty.

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Speaker 2: I had the whole place to myself.

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Speaker 1: That was nice.

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Speaker 2: But as soon as I closed the stall door, then

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Speaker 2: somebody comes into the to the stall, but the to

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Speaker 2: the urinal. But the urinal's right. I took the first

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Speaker 2: stall hand up. I shouldn't have done that. I should

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Speaker 2: have taken the one in the back or something, but

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Speaker 2: I don't want to be a jerk and take the

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Speaker 2: handicap one, which happened to be in the back, which

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Speaker 2: I find interesting because why would the handicap stall be

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Speaker 2: the last stall, where as in the parking lot it's

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Speaker 2: always gotta be one of them front stalls.

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Speaker 1: And how close are we to.

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Speaker 2: You know, having to have some kind of like uh

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Speaker 2: idea or something to be able to use those handicap stalls,

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Speaker 2: much like the parking I'm not saying that we should.

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Speaker 2: I'm just speaking out loud, just thinking now, something's never

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Speaker 2: even occurred to me until just right this moment. I

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Speaker 2: usually don't even think too much about handicapped stalls, but

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Speaker 2: for whatever reason, I'm on one now. So anyway, so

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Speaker 2: then when you're when you're in a position where like this,

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Speaker 2: you have to try to time it because there's no

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Speaker 2: there's no music in there, there's nothing. It's just silence.

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Speaker 2: It's just the echoes of a target restaurant. The guy

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Speaker 2: in the urinal directly next to me. I'm in the stall.

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Speaker 2: I have to wait till the flush before I can

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Speaker 2: start any action because then otherwise it's.

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Speaker 1: It's whole thing.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's not like this guy's like, Oh, I

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Speaker 2: wonder what that guy's doing there. He knows what I'm

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Speaker 2: doing in there, So I mean, I guess I'm not

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Speaker 2: surprising anybody. But either way, So yeah, life comes at

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Speaker 2: you fast. One minute, you're uh, man, you look fantastic

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Speaker 2: for your age.

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Speaker 1: Look at this guy. There's no way.

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Speaker 2: You're in your early forties, there's no chance. Look at

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Speaker 2: this guy with the beard and everything. And then next

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Speaker 2: minute you're about to shit yourself and you're trying to

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Speaker 2: hold it in so that you don't get heard. Johnny,

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Speaker 2: hu'd your day go well? As everybody knows. We are

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Speaker 2: now found on the iHeart radio.

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Speaker 1: App, the free app.

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Speaker 2: By the way, one of my favorite things about iHeart

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Speaker 2: is this, uh the jingle ball that they do every

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Speaker 2: December They take a collection of some of the biggest

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Speaker 2: pop stars and rock stars in the world and they

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Speaker 2: bring them to you all in one monster show just

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Speaker 2: for the holidays. I think it's the coolest thing. I

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Speaker 2: also now that kind of have an inn and in

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Speaker 2: slightly with iHeart, I'm pitching myself as the host of

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Speaker 2: one of these jingle balls for twenty twenty six. Now, Johnny,

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Speaker 2: it's not gona be easy. It's not gonna be easy

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Speaker 2: at all. We got a lot of work to do

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Speaker 2: in twenty six in order to accomplish this goal. But

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Speaker 2: I'm working on it. For those of you that don't

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Speaker 2: know jingle ball is, and you're just you're a crazy person.

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Speaker 2: You don't jingle ball. This is basically it's in the

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Speaker 2: biggest markets in the United States and the biggest radio

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Speaker 2: market media markets the United States. They host these big shows, right,

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Speaker 2: So we're talking at Miami, Florida. We're talking at Atlanta, Georgia, Washington,

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Speaker 2: d C, Philadelphia, LA, Boston, New York, Chicago, I mean,

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Speaker 2: the biggest cities in the United States. And then you know,

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Speaker 2: the local iHeartRadio station hosts.

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Speaker 1: The big jingle ball huge artists.

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Speaker 2: We're talking jelly Roll shine Down AJR, Alex Warren, Ed

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Speaker 2: Sheering is doing the one in Boston here coming up. MGK,

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Speaker 2: my guy, I got them double excess on my wrist.

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Speaker 2: Huge shows, okay, huge shows. I'd like to All I

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Speaker 2: want to do is host. I'm not asking to perform,

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Speaker 2: although with that being said, I have prepared some chokes.

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Speaker 2: I think it would be awesome to have a host

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Speaker 2: that comes out, you know, kind of feeling it out,

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Speaker 2: similar to like an award show, and let's just keep

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Speaker 2: it moving, but to keep it light hearted, keep the

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Speaker 2: have some little boom boom boom while one liners in between.

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Speaker 1: So Johnny fits cool with you.

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Speaker 2: I would like to try out some of the material

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Speaker 2: that I have here that I think is a sample

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Speaker 2: of what I could do, what I would say when

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Speaker 2: I host jingle Ball in twenty twenty six. Because I'm

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Speaker 2: serious about this, I'm not saying, you know, bring the

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Speaker 2: jingle Ball to Omaha where I'm at. I'll go to you, Okay,

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Speaker 2: I'll go to you and we'll do We'll do the

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Speaker 2: big jingle Ball and I'll just maybe host one. Okay.

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Speaker 2: So here's all right, Johnny, so I'm getting it. Let's

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Speaker 2: imagine a big arena. Okay, we're at the uh let's

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Speaker 2: let's pretend we're going to Atlanta right now. Okay, they

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Speaker 2: brought me out. I'm hosting this big show. We got

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Speaker 2: Little John and friends. Nellie's gonna be here. Okay, we're

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Speaker 2: at the Capitol one State Farm Arena or something. Okay,

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Speaker 2: let's see, let's see what I can do. This is

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Speaker 2: gonna be the crowd, okay, Johnny, please, yeah, thank you.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to jiggle Ball, the only holiday event where the

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Speaker 2: outfits get smaller as the temperature drops. Thank you, Johny. Well, gee,

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Speaker 2: we'll need you there too. We'll do what We'll need

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Speaker 2: you there too, to help me out with some of

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Speaker 2: this stuff. I saw performer backstage wearing something that legally

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Speaker 2: qualified as dental flaws. If you're listening at home, Yes,

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Speaker 2: the crowd looks incredible tonight. Everyone's dressed festive like they're

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Speaker 2: ready for Christmas. We're trying really hard to make their

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Speaker 2: ex jealous on Instagram.

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Speaker 1: So that's what I'm saying, Johnny, I got these jokes.

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Speaker 1: I think it would just be funny.

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Speaker 2: I come out, I just you know, give a few

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Speaker 2: of these uh one liners, and you know, and that

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Speaker 2: could be you know, that'd be me coming out right

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Speaker 2: before Nelly. Okay, and now he's gonna like he's gonna

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Speaker 2: open and then uh, you know, Little John, Little John

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Speaker 2: and Friends is coming up. Okay, you know, coming up

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Speaker 2: just a little bit. But first, you know, Santa's got

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Speaker 2: his nice list and his naughty list. I'm on the

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Speaker 2: We're gonna circle back on that list. You know, Santa

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Speaker 2: shows up tonight, don't freak out. He's just here for

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Speaker 2: the influencers. I asked Santa for a six pack this year.

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Speaker 1: He delivered.

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Speaker 2: It's not the kind you drink responsibly. See That's what

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Speaker 2: I'm saying. Then let's get the crowd going. Yeah, man,

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Speaker 2: this crowd is electric and slightly drunk, which honestly is

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Speaker 2: the ideal Christmas ratio. I smell peppermint coco in a

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Speaker 2: third cent. I'll politely label somebody pregamed in the parking lot, you.

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Speaker 1: Know, and then we'll bring out a Little John. I'll

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Speaker 1: be fun.

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Speaker 2: Okay, when you ever you're in Atlanta, you know you

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Speaker 2: got to have Jermaine Dupre and his friends as well.

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Speaker 2: So before I bring out Jermaine, you know, let's uh,

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Speaker 2: you know, let's make some noise not too much, though.

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Speaker 2: Security is already looking at us like someone heroes child support. Now,

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Speaker 2: I didn't mean that about you, Jermaine. That was not

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Speaker 2: a shot at Jermaine. I just want to know that

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Speaker 2: I don't want to get in trouble at the jingle Ball.

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Speaker 2: Give it up one more time, people. My watch just

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Speaker 2: buzzed the check. If I'm doing cardio or experiencing fear,

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Speaker 2: I would be quite scared. I think, you know, Mariah

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Speaker 2: Carey hasn't fully thought yet, but she sends her regards

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Speaker 2: or at least a high note that cracked a satellite.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Mariah is not on this year's jingle Ball. If she

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Speaker 2: is on next year's, I'm probably gonna have to throw

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Speaker 2: that joke away. These performers look incredible, the kind of

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Speaker 2: incredible that makes me rethink everything I eat after nine pm,

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Speaker 2: which lately has been a lot of chocolate. I've been

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Speaker 2: eating like leftover Halloween candy. I'm about through it, so

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Speaker 2: that's uh. I have truly been gaining weight from probably

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Speaker 2: my snacking. That or the pregnant zone I'm on that.

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Speaker 2: That steroid always does it to me. That one I

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Speaker 2: just made up on the spot here I did not

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Speaker 2: pre write that joke. I don't even think I'm gonna

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Speaker 2: that was just life.

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Speaker 1: That one.

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Speaker 2: That one's for you. That one was just life hosting

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Speaker 2: jingle balls wild. One minute, I'm hyping up the crowd,

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Speaker 2: the next I'm dodging a stage manager who moves like

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Speaker 2: he's powered by pure espresso and resentment. If you were

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Speaker 2: a crash backstage, don't worry, that's just me knocking over

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Speaker 2: a prop worth more than my car, especially if I

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Speaker 2: don't get those tires soon. What's that car worth with

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Speaker 2: no wheels? Baby?

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Speaker 1: Thanks Johnny.

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Speaker 2: That was just real life as well. Then you you know,

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Speaker 2: then you always you always got to send them all happy, right,

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Speaker 2: you know, drive safe, be kind, tipwell, and if you

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Speaker 2: can't do all three, at least lie confidently about to

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Speaker 2: happy holidays. I remember, it's the night gets blurry. That's

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Speaker 2: not the lights, that's the choices. I'm telling you what iHeart.

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Speaker 2: If you're listening, I know you are. We've got to

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Speaker 2: give me on this jingle ball Next year, I'm available,

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Speaker 2: but I'd prefer to book it early, just so that

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Speaker 2: I can kind of manage, you know, manage my manage

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Speaker 2: my week a little easier so well there you go. Uh,

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Speaker 2: just a little little Christmas spirit we've got in the

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Speaker 2: air right now.

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Speaker 1: I can feel it.

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Speaker 2: As I was hurriedly rushing through the target so I

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Speaker 2: didn't ship myself.

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Speaker 1: I could feel the energy that Christmas is.

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Speaker 4: Snow falls soft on the rooftop, glow.

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Speaker 1: The fire hungs.

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Speaker 3: While the laughter flows.

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Speaker 4: Jeremy's voice, it's the holiday.

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Speaker 5: Show we mekay.

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Speaker 6: You see, it's the same ride come through the pines

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Speaker 6: and jokes, So.

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Speaker 4: Laugh with me, laugh, whiztling who the punchlines land like

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Speaker 4: falling snow, witty and warm.

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Speaker 3: They steal the show. Mm hmmm. A pod casts skip

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Speaker 3: rapped with the boat.

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Speaker 4: Every giggle lights the tree, every chuckle.

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Speaker 6: Hard whiggly okt Jude. See it's the.

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Speaker 3: Slave ride of car.

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Speaker 5: Through the pines and jokes.

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Speaker 4: Laugh with me, Laugh with megnoxips.

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Speaker 5: And a belly full of cheer stories and jokes that

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Speaker 5: we hold so near. Jeremy's laugh is the sound we all.

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Speaker 3: Hm hmmnoxips and a belly full of cheer stories and

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Speaker 3: jokes that we hold so here.

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Speaker 4: Jimmy's alife is the sound.

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Speaker 3: We all here.

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Speaker 1: I made Christmas.

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Speaker 3: Everybody