Speaker 1: Iami, Yamla. I had a baby daddy relationship. I spent
Speaker 1: time in a relationship with a married man. I had
Speaker 1: to learn the skills and tools required to make my
Speaker 1: relationships healthy, fulfilling and loving. Welcome to the r Spot,
Speaker 1: a production of shondaland Audio in partnership with iHeartRadio. Welcome,
Speaker 1: Welcome to the art Spot, the place we come to
Speaker 1: discuss all things relationship and all relationships. I am Miamla,
Speaker 1: your host, your guide, your facilitator, your support system as
Speaker 1: you take a deeper look into the relationships in your life.
Speaker 1: And boy, do we have a top today. Earlier this week,
Speaker 1: one of my former students wrote me a very interesting email,
Speaker 1: and in that email, he asked me, Mama, ear how
Speaker 1: should I be with pain? How should I be with pain?
Speaker 1: You know, with everything that's going on in the world today,
Speaker 1: a lot of people are in pain. Some because they're
Speaker 1: impacted directly, some because of the way they think about
Speaker 1: what's going on, Some because they feel the energy of
Speaker 1: what's going on, Some because they feel hopeless, some feel helpless.
Speaker 1: But a lot of people are in pain. One of
Speaker 1: the things that I said to my students was, what
Speaker 1: is your relationship with disaster. What is your relationship with disaster?
Speaker 1: Even if it's not your disaster. Do not rush in
Speaker 1: to fix it or to run away from the sadness
Speaker 1: of the moment, trying to escape the moment and bypass
Speaker 1: the gift that the pain is offering you. When you're
Speaker 1: in pain pain, pay attention inward. Now. The first thing
Speaker 1: to do is go in and identify what that pain is.
Speaker 1: Is it a pain of fear? Is it a pain
Speaker 1: of sadness? Is it a pain because of what you're thinking,
Speaker 1: what you're feeling? What is the pain? When pain is present,
Speaker 1: it really is a source of deep knowing. What do
Speaker 1: you know? What do you know? Not what do you think?
Speaker 1: But what do you know about what you're experiencing? You see,
Speaker 1: when we're in pain about what's going on in the world,
Speaker 1: it's because we know that we are connected to each other,
Speaker 1: to everyone, to everything. But are we acting like that?
Speaker 1: Are you acting like you're connected to the person you're
Speaker 1: cussing out on the freeway because they cut you off,
Speaker 1: You're connected to that they cut you off. You don't
Speaker 1: know if they're rushing to pick up a sick child
Speaker 1: or if they're on their way to the doctor. Or
Speaker 1: if they're just mindlessly driving, bless them, don't cuss them. No,
Speaker 1: you're connected to that person and the cuss you send
Speaker 1: out to them today is going to come back to
Speaker 1: you tomorrow. Pain is a source of deep knowing. Pain
Speaker 1: offers us critical information about something within us that may
Speaker 1: needs to be balanced, that may needs to be brought
Speaker 1: into alignment, something that we need to be accountable for,
Speaker 1: but also something that we are responsible for. Pay attention
Speaker 1: inward now. Sometimes pain is teelling us that we need
Speaker 1: to do something different. There are so many people upset
Speaker 1: about the political landscape who are saying that they're not
Speaker 1: going to vote. Really, you're upset about what's going on
Speaker 1: and you're not going to participate in it. And I
Speaker 1: heard I think his name was Big Mike. He said
Speaker 1: something very interesting. He said, don't vote personality, vote policy,
Speaker 1: and vote the policies that serve you the best. So
Speaker 1: when you're looking out on the political landscape, don't look
Speaker 1: at personality, don't look at age, don't look at race.
Speaker 1: What is this person saying and how is what they're
Speaker 1: saying gonna serve me? And the minute they start talking
Speaker 1: about againstness, then you need to look inside and say, okay,
Speaker 1: who and what am I against? And why is this
Speaker 1: againstness lining up with me? Pay attention inward. Now, yes,
Speaker 1: there is a lot going on in the world, But
Speaker 1: I lean into a course in miracles, and I say,
Speaker 1: I don't know what anything is for. I don't know
Speaker 1: what anything is for, and I give meaning to everything
Speaker 1: that I see. So if what I see is causing
Speaker 1: me disturbance, distress, upset, frustration, concern, all the words my
Speaker 1: guests used today, if what I see is giving me
Speaker 1: causing me to have those experiences, then let me look
Speaker 1: at the meaning that I'm given this stuff, let me
Speaker 1: look at the judgments I have about it, and then
Speaker 1: forgive myself so that I can be accountable for my
Speaker 1: own thoughts and feelings and become responsible for how I
Speaker 1: respond to them. I think our relationship with the world
Speaker 1: gives us a powerful, powerful starting point for building a
Speaker 1: better and deeper relationship with what we think, why we
Speaker 1: think it, how we think it, what we feel, and
Speaker 1: how we process those feelings. And if you're really having
Speaker 1: a hard time, make a god job, turn it over,
Speaker 1: give it to something higher and greater than you. Get
Speaker 1: a map of the world, get a globe I have
Speaker 1: a globe, and sometimes in my prayer I'll just rub
Speaker 1: my hands all over that globe and let those prayers
Speaker 1: fall where they need to fall. It's not my business
Speaker 1: where they go, but I'm sending it out to the world.
Speaker 1: Get a map of the United States, put your finger
Speaker 1: on a particular state or county or area and pray
Speaker 1: light there, Send love there, send compassion there. May Ohio
Speaker 1: no peace, May everyone in Ohio have what they need.
Speaker 1: And don't listen to the news or social media that
Speaker 1: says this happened, that happen. And just know that your prayers,
Speaker 1: your good thoughts, are like a pebble in the ocean
Speaker 1: of humanity, and it will ripple out and it will
Speaker 1: have an impact. I think I have another caller. Let's
Speaker 1: see where they are in their relationship. Do what you
Speaker 1: can where you are, without expectation of reward or recognition.
Speaker 1: Don't toot your own horn, don't pray on the corner
Speaker 1: for other people to hear you and see you. Pray
Speaker 1: silently and send the light out. Greetings and welcome to
Speaker 1: the art Spot. We're talking today about our relationship with
Speaker 1: the world, our relationship in the world, and how it
Speaker 1: impacts our relationship with ourselves. So, as the beloved Wendy
Speaker 1: Williams would say, how you doing in the world.
Speaker 2: I'm coping and and trying to stay hopeful and doing
Speaker 2: my best.
Speaker 1: Okay, tell more coping. What does that mean?
Speaker 2: I think in life to thrive, you have to be hopeful.
Speaker 2: You have to be you know, in a place where
Speaker 2: you feel like will kind of prevail. In the past
Speaker 2: couple of years have just been very challenging from everything
Speaker 2: with presidential elections and COVID and just seeing social injustice
Speaker 2: be so rampant. I think it's taking its toll on
Speaker 2: my nervouses. I know it's taking its toll on my
Speaker 2: nervous system. And you know, I'm a person who does
Speaker 2: the work, you know. I meditate, I pray, I encourage
Speaker 2: other people. I try to believe and be optimistic. But
Speaker 2: it's been challenging. I just think with the current state
Speaker 2: of affairs and seeing things play out the way they've
Speaker 2: played out, it's taken in such a toll on my
Speaker 2: nervous system. I am an African American woman, so it's
Speaker 2: been very challenging, I must say, and not just from
Speaker 2: on all planes, so not just you know, with where
Speaker 2: we are with the inflation and things costing more and
Speaker 2: making things more challenging on the home front to just
Speaker 2: kind of, you know, be in a place I'm making
Speaker 2: ends meet or feeling like you did good for yourself,
Speaker 2: and then seeing that it's not worth what it once
Speaker 2: was worth, and then dealing with the fact of safety,
Speaker 2: and dealing with the fact of you know, corporate greed
Speaker 2: and all of these things. It has really taken its toll.
Speaker 2: And even when I'm telling myself that hey, right now,
Speaker 2: in and now in the present, you're good, your needs
Speaker 2: are met, you have what you need, my nervous system
Speaker 2: is still rilling from the effects of all of the trauma.
Speaker 1: Wow, that's interesting. Where are you with inflation? Because I
Speaker 1: I really didn't know there was no inflation. I really didn't.
Speaker 1: I go to the store with my list, and I
Speaker 1: try very hard to stay till on my list. If
Speaker 1: I get off my list, I've never had to put
Speaker 1: anything back, so I'm good. I didn't know there was
Speaker 1: inflation until they told me.
Speaker 2: Yes. It's very especially for the quote unquote yet, but
Speaker 2: it used to be the middle class. It's very challenging
Speaker 2: our middle class.
Speaker 1: Don't don't get a twisted baby, I am middle class.
Speaker 2: I've been a relatory for twenty years. Housing prices at
Speaker 2: an all time high. We basically had four hundred years
Speaker 2: of inflation in four years. You know in my area
Speaker 2: where you used to could buy a beautiful home for
Speaker 2: a bedroom, too, too bath home for your family that
Speaker 2: used to run one sixty eight two hundred thousand. Those
Speaker 2: are now six hundred thousand. But the salaries have gone up.
Speaker 2: Even rent rates are now. You know where you used
Speaker 2: to corn a three room apartment for twelve hundred dollars,
Speaker 2: That apartment is now twenty eight hundred dollars in four
Speaker 2: years time.
Speaker 1: When I was little, my mom would send me to
Speaker 1: the store with a dollar. With a dollar, I could
Speaker 1: get bread, milk, and fifty cent worth of bologne, and
Speaker 1: sometimes have three or four cents left over to buy
Speaker 1: some bazooka bubblegum. Things have really changed, having.
Speaker 2: It it really changed.
Speaker 1: Do you remember when you could get can you you
Speaker 1: could get three pounds of chicken wings for five Oh no,
Speaker 1: it's five pounds of chicken wings for three dollars? Do
Speaker 1: you remember that?
Speaker 2: That might have been before my time?
Speaker 1: On what you try to say, I'm old. Prices are rising,
Speaker 1: But I bet you what, do you have an iPhone
Speaker 1: or an Android?
Speaker 2: I have a very very old iPhone. I'm not one
Speaker 2: of those people that try to keep it. As a
Speaker 2: matter of fact, I'm still in the single digits with
Speaker 2: my iPhone, So I'm not one of those people that
Speaker 2: try to keep up with transit.
Speaker 1: No, maybe not to keep up with it, but I'm
Speaker 1: going to. I just want to offer people are screaming
Speaker 1: about the price of eggs that they're looking at on
Speaker 1: their thousand dollars iPhone. Yes, things have increased, but we
Speaker 1: have different means of transportation, the supply chain where we're
Speaker 1: getting it from, manufacturing costs, all of those things have changed.
Speaker 1: They've changed, They've changed with the times, and that's just
Speaker 1: what happens.
Speaker 2: They should have changed to go down, though, Ayana. I
Speaker 2: mean with all of the technology and all of the improvements,
Speaker 2: you know, you can now you don't have to have
Speaker 2: as much movement in it because they have things like
Speaker 2: three D printing and such. There's no reason for inflation
Speaker 2: to be at this all time high. That and it's
Speaker 2: really taking its toll on people's mental it's really taking
Speaker 2: its toll on people's physical and you know, and it's
Speaker 2: a lot to process, and so you really don't know.
Speaker 2: People want to be aware, and they want to be
Speaker 2: in and now, and they want to be a part
Speaker 2: of the process, but they're also have to protect their
Speaker 2: own peace and their own you know, mental and physical
Speaker 2: well being, and so it's hard to know when you
Speaker 2: should be clocked in and when and when you have
Speaker 2: to clock out, and when you have to clock out,
Speaker 2: how long can you be clocked out because you still
Speaker 2: have to be a part of this machine, and the
Speaker 2: bills still have to get paid, and you still have
Speaker 2: to show up for work, and the cycle still has
Speaker 2: to continue on. So being in the world right now
Speaker 2: is an odd place to be. And you know, with
Speaker 2: all of the decades that I've seen, I've just never
Speaker 2: seen a time where it was just taking such a
Speaker 2: toll on people's mental and physical well being. You know,
Speaker 2: when a couple of years back in the nineties, in
Speaker 2: the early two thousands, you didn't hear a lot of
Speaker 2: the terminology that you hear now around you know, people
Speaker 2: really being mentally broken, you know, about their emotional well
Speaker 2: being and all of this. And not to say that
Speaker 2: they didn't have their own struggles then, but this is
Speaker 2: just it's been a lot to mentally process covid alone.
Speaker 2: Covid alone did a number on people, you know, the isolation,
Speaker 2: the uncertainty, the not knowing if you're ever going to
Speaker 2: be in the presence of people that you love again,
Speaker 2: the loved one's lost. Covid alone did a whole mental
Speaker 2: number on people. And then coming out of that and
Speaker 2: things just jumping right back in into warp speed because
Speaker 2: of those two years that were lost, the supply chain
Speaker 2: that's messed up, and now, like I said, with the
Speaker 2: inflation toppled, with the social injustice you know, I mean,
Speaker 2: no one ever thought in your lifetime that you would
Speaker 2: see what happened on Capitol to Hell, you know, and
Speaker 2: things of that nature in our country, Like no one thought, hey,
Speaker 2: you know, our own democracy would see an attack on
Speaker 2: this land. And so it's a lot to process emotionally,
Speaker 2: and that emotional trauma will take its toll on your
Speaker 2: nervous system. And your nervous.
Speaker 1: System is nervous system, not mine, not my nervous system.
Speaker 2: My question for you when your nervous system where you're
Speaker 2: a fight a flight, it is saying danger, danger, danger,
Speaker 2: you know, and you're trying to talk yourself off that
Speaker 2: ledge and saying, hey, it's not that bad. It doesn't
Speaker 2: have to be in that space. Because of this state
Speaker 2: of all these things and how people are processing these things,
Speaker 2: whether people are paying attention to it, we're paying too
Speaker 2: much attention to it. And another thing I want to
Speaker 2: hold in on that, I think why a lot of
Speaker 2: people are struggling so much is because they're so tuned
Speaker 2: into social media. And social media can be very polarizing
Speaker 2: with painting the very one sided picture of you know,
Speaker 2: the state of affairs. But most people aren't really so
Speaker 2: reliant on television or newscasting as much as they are
Speaker 2: about getting that delivered to them via social media. And
Speaker 2: we do know that those algorithms and everything are programmed
Speaker 2: to overstimulate and so in that even though you know,
Speaker 2: like you can say, hey, in my personal space, within myself,
Speaker 2: everything is okay, calm down, but d're in your fight
Speaker 2: a flight of saying no, it's not okay, it's not okay.
Speaker 2: How do you deal with that battle?
Speaker 1: How do I deal with it? Or how should you
Speaker 1: deal with it? Because I don't have that battle.
Speaker 2: How should I do then? Or people who do have
Speaker 2: that battle? How should they deal with it. People's emotional
Speaker 2: and mental states and will being all functioned on a
Speaker 2: different accord. So people process trauma differently.
Speaker 1: We're all traumatized. We are all traumatized. We're all traumatized.
Speaker 1: You got your trauma, I got my trauma. We are
Speaker 1: all traumatized. I am a trauma specialist. Trust me in
Speaker 1: both experiencing it and working through it. First of all,
Speaker 1: thank you for sharing, because I think that you have
Speaker 1: demonstrated a very common problem, a very common issue that
Speaker 1: many people care front. We'll talk about that when we
Speaker 1: come back. Welcome back to the R spot. Let's pick
Speaker 1: up where we left. Are you speak externally? You speak
Speaker 1: about how do you? And most people and people and
Speaker 1: that has nothing to do with you, You nosy, You
Speaker 1: all up in other people's business. How about you? How
Speaker 1: do you experience it? Because I heard you say you pray,
Speaker 1: you meditate, and what do you get out of that?
Speaker 1: Because see when I go in and I pray and
Speaker 1: I meditate, you know what I hear, I got you.
Speaker 1: That's what I hear. I got you. And so when
Speaker 1: somebody comes to me like you do, saying and what
Speaker 1: do you tell most people? I say, no, that God's
Speaker 1: got you, and it don't matter what's going on, You're
Speaker 1: gonna have what you need and what you can do
Speaker 1: to support others. If that's a concern to you, pray
Speaker 1: for constantly, send prayers out, send light out. You be
Speaker 1: as joyful and peaceful as you can. You call in
Speaker 1: what you need, you know for yourself, so that you
Speaker 1: can be a demonstration to others of what's possible. We're
Speaker 1: looking at the world and all of the wahala and
Speaker 1: the against us and the upset and upheaval, and we're saying,
Speaker 1: we're judging it. We're saying it should not be, but
Speaker 1: it is. So what do you think, in the highest
Speaker 1: realm could possibly be the reason, could be the purpose
Speaker 1: of everything that's going on in the world. What could
Speaker 1: it possibly be? Have you ever thought about that?
Speaker 2: I have I tried to, you know, identify and be
Speaker 2: okay with circumstances and and things that are out of
Speaker 2: my control. I have no control over those things, so
Speaker 2: they're out of my hands generally, and that and on
Speaker 2: a very personal level, you know, when I am praying,
Speaker 2: I'm only me. I only know my space, I only
Speaker 2: know my emotions and my feelings regarding you. Know that circumstance.
Speaker 2: But when I do pray, I do hear that God's
Speaker 2: got me and it has carried me. And not only that,
Speaker 2: you know, just from personal experiences of me, not fully
Speaker 2: understanding you know, everything that's moving or on around me,
Speaker 2: but you know, seeing when when when all the parts
Speaker 2: and the pieces come together, and see that final outcome,
Speaker 2: seeing that, okay, all was good, this is why things
Speaker 2: were moving around, or this is why things have happened,
Speaker 2: or the calm after the storm, you know, when the
Speaker 2: winds are blowing and you know, and it's storm and
Speaker 2: it's scary and it's uncertain, but that that first sunshine
Speaker 2: that breaks, everything is clean, everything is beautiful, you know,
Speaker 2: So it comes full circle. So I do understand the
Speaker 2: balance of that.
Speaker 1: Have you asked in your prayer and meditation what is
Speaker 1: the purpose of going everything that's going on? Have you
Speaker 1: asked that question in your prayer in your meditation? Do
Speaker 1: you think that Do you think that God is with
Speaker 1: the people in Ukraine?
Speaker 2: I think I think God is with all things. You know,
Speaker 2: in my belief system, I believe that God is in
Speaker 2: the midst of all things. You know, God is all.
Speaker 1: If God is in the midst of Ukraine. Do you
Speaker 1: think God was on the capitol on January sixth, because.
Speaker 2: I think there were some things that needed to be exposed.
Speaker 1: Uhhah. And do you think God is in Israel, Gaza,
Speaker 1: Palestine with the Palestinian people right now?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's in all places.
Speaker 1: I remember I was in New York when the Twin
Speaker 1: Towers fell, when they were attacked and they fell, and
Speaker 1: I remember just weeping, weeping, weeping, weeping when I saw
Speaker 1: that second plane hit. And immediately after I finished weeping,
Speaker 1: I started praying for those who were in the tower,
Speaker 1: those who were who were affected by it, the family members,
Speaker 1: because that's what I could do, That's what I could do.
Speaker 1: And I don't need to know the result of it.
Speaker 1: I don't need to know, but I know my prayer
Speaker 1: was like a pebble in the pond and it rippled
Speaker 1: out and it had an impact to those closest to me,
Speaker 1: to those in the next rain and the next ring
Speaker 1: and the next ring and the next ring. Okay, so
Speaker 1: then what's going on in your nervous system if you're
Speaker 1: looking at these things and you say you know that God, source, Creator,
Speaker 1: higher mind, infinite intelligence, whatever you want to call it
Speaker 1: is in all of this, why is a nervous system
Speaker 1: destroy upset or imbalance.
Speaker 2: I think that trauma can start self in your body.
Speaker 2: I think you know, a lot of times we pay
Speaker 2: a lot of attention to our spirit selves. We pay
Speaker 2: a lot of attention to our mental, but we don't
Speaker 2: really pay as much attention to the physical. And I
Speaker 2: think the trauma does store itself in your body. And
Speaker 2: I think we have to focus on the tryheart figures
Speaker 2: that in contents are being and where I have done
Speaker 2: well with two, maybe lacked in the third or you know,
Speaker 2: physically big going to work out those type of things
Speaker 2: you know on it, but the component of you know,
Speaker 2: fully engaging and understanding that I have to take the
Speaker 2: time to work on relaxing and healing my nervous system
Speaker 2: as well.
Speaker 1: I think it's in your sense I hear I don't
Speaker 1: even think I hear it in your speaking, because I
Speaker 1: started counting, I'm up to nine times you've said I think,
Speaker 1: I think, I think, I think, and thought is energy
Speaker 1: and energy can never be destroyed. It can be transformed,
Speaker 1: but it can't be destroyed. So for you, for all
Speaker 1: folk who are experiencing the impact of what we could
Speaker 1: call trauma or whatever we want to call it. It's
Speaker 1: lodged in our thoughts. See, because if I know that
Speaker 1: God is in the midst of us, if I know
Speaker 1: all things are working out for the good, if I
Speaker 1: know God's source, Creator is sovereign and present and in everything.
Speaker 1: While I may not understand what I'm seeing healing experiencing,
Speaker 1: I know that something greater and grander is going on.
Speaker 1: And I'm going to stick with what I know as
Speaker 1: opposed to what I think, because the judgment could be
Speaker 1: I don't know this to be true, that this is wrong,
Speaker 1: this isn't right, This shouldn't be going on. You said it.
Speaker 1: Things shouldn't be as high as they are now, but
Speaker 1: they are. So I have to know God is in that.
Speaker 1: God is in these high prices. God is in the
Speaker 1: rising hole housing prices. God is in corporate greed. Now,
Speaker 1: what the purpose of it is I may not recognize,
Speaker 1: but I know God has a plan. I know that,
Speaker 1: so I don't have to think about it. Do I
Speaker 1: like what I see? I wouldn't prefer it. It's very unpreferred,
Speaker 1: But I'm not going to condemn it either, because there's
Speaker 1: something greater than me going on and all I can
Speaker 1: ask for. God, give me understanding, give me discernments, give
Speaker 1: me discernment, Tell me what it is I must do,
Speaker 1: how I can do, how I can be of greater service,
Speaker 1: And let me take the emphasis off. Because your central
Speaker 1: nervous system is governed by your will. Your will is
Speaker 1: lodged in your solar plexus, in the center of your being.
Speaker 1: So when our will is either the suppressed depressed, when
Speaker 1: our will is not being mad, then we have to
Speaker 1: unite our will with divine will. Does that make sense
Speaker 1: to you, just ma'am? Okay, So how can you get
Speaker 1: in greater alignment with divine will? We'll talk about that
Speaker 1: right after this break. Welcome back to the R spot.
Speaker 1: Let's get back to the conversation. You said you're a realtor.
Speaker 1: Have you affirmed that. I know these are difficult, challenging
Speaker 1: These may look like difficult and challenging times, but every
Speaker 1: single one of my clients is going to find the
Speaker 1: perfect home and the perfect financing for that home. Thank
Speaker 1: you God, just ma'am. As opposed to going into a
Speaker 1: potential sale with oh my god, I know this price
Speaker 1: is high. Ten years ago they could have got this house.
Speaker 1: No No, this is my client. My client is surrounded
Speaker 1: by goodness and they're going to find the home. They're
Speaker 1: going to get the financing because that's God's will.
Speaker 2: Yes, ma'am. And you know, and I am very optimistic
Speaker 2: with my clients, you know. I feel like, you know,
Speaker 2: it's one of those things where it will, it will
Speaker 2: resolve itself. It's not the first time we've faced, you know, inflation.
Speaker 2: It's not the first time we've heard rumors or even experience,
Speaker 2: you know, what people would call a recession. And you know,
Speaker 2: and the years I've been on this planet, things are
Speaker 2: work themselves out. And so yeah, that's really what keeps
Speaker 2: me going is that you know, we're resilient people, you know,
Speaker 2: and that it's a resilient planet and things will work
Speaker 2: itself out.
Speaker 1: I want you to get more into your being because
Speaker 1: you're talking about your central nervous system and your well being,
Speaker 1: and you continue to externalize we are resilient people. We are,
Speaker 1: you know, we we we How about I am a
Speaker 1: resilient being. I am you know, grounded and centered in
Speaker 1: truth and light because if you get it cleared up
Speaker 1: in you, you can be such a powerful demonstration for others.
Speaker 1: But you keep externalizing talking in the third person as
Speaker 1: opposed to the first person. Are you aware of that.
Speaker 2: As you point it out? And I find and I
Speaker 2: gather strength, and you know, and seeing helping other people
Speaker 2: to win, and seeing other people you know do good
Speaker 2: and celebrating other people. So I do I do too,
Speaker 2: I do too.
Speaker 1: But you know what, here's my principle. My cup runneth over.
Speaker 1: But what's in the cup is mind. I've got to
Speaker 1: keep my cup full. So my cup has to be
Speaker 1: full in order for me to be able to clearly
Speaker 1: serve and support and be a benefit to other people.
Speaker 1: And if my central nervous system is shot the hell
Speaker 1: because of trauma and upset, I'm my cupping full. Keep
Speaker 1: your cup full? Start with you. How do we clean
Speaker 1: up your central nervous system? What is going on that?
Speaker 1: How can you shift your perspective? What judgments do you
Speaker 1: need to release? What is How do you get deeper
Speaker 1: into your knowing and lessen your thinking? How can we
Speaker 1: do that? I serve other people all day long. I
Speaker 1: was up at six thirty this morning serving people after
Speaker 1: I went to bed at three twenty. How can you
Speaker 1: do that?
Speaker 2: I guess you know I have to continue to just
Speaker 2: do the work and give myself the space to focus
Speaker 2: on myself.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't sound too happy about that. Could you
Speaker 1: say that with a little more joy?
Speaker 2: Isolation is not a strong suit for me, you know,
Speaker 2: I think, Yeah, isolation.
Speaker 1: Is not like isolation? Where where are you hearing isolation?
Speaker 1: Where are you hearing that in my communication? Is that
Speaker 1: what you're hearing I'm asking you to do.
Speaker 2: When I'm focusing on myself, I generally do tend to isolate.
Speaker 1: That's interesting, So you mean tell me what that looks
Speaker 1: like when you're focusing on yourself and you're isolating. Tell
Speaker 1: me how that works.
Speaker 2: Well, when I'm focusing on myself, like I really go
Speaker 2: in work and so you know, it's like if I
Speaker 2: feel like, you know, I want to process the feelings.
Speaker 2: I want to know that these are my feelings that
Speaker 2: they're you know, not. I don't like a lot of
Speaker 2: outside chatter or or noise. So yeah, I generally do
Speaker 2: tend to just get still and you know, get to
Speaker 2: myself and isolate. But how long set out a lot
Speaker 2: of outside sometimes for short periods of time, sometimes for
Speaker 2: long periods of time. It just kind of all depends
Speaker 2: on you. Know, once I feel whatever turmoil or conflict
Speaker 2: that's been resolved, then you know, I feel like, okay,
Speaker 2: now I can go back and present myself. But it's
Speaker 2: been long periods of time. Sometimes sometimes it's it may
Speaker 2: just be for a couple of hours. It may just
Speaker 2: be for a day. Sometimes it might be for weeks.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it might be for months. But yeah, I generally
Speaker 2: tend to isolate.
Speaker 1: Do you have a god jar? Do you know what
Speaker 1: a god jar is? I do not? Or god box?
Speaker 1: Do you know what that is? Okay, I used to
Speaker 1: have a god jar. I got an old man aged
Speaker 1: jar and I cleaned it out and I decorated mine.
Speaker 1: Because I'm a vergo, I gotta do some glitter. I
Speaker 1: gotta do it. I have to do some bling on everything. Okay.
Speaker 1: So I got this old man aged jar and I
Speaker 1: blined it out. I mean, I put a little skirt
Speaker 1: on it with a rubber band and put some glitter
Speaker 1: on it, and I put a name on it, Godja.
Speaker 1: Every time, any time anything would come up to disturb
Speaker 1: or disrupt my piece, I would write it down on
Speaker 1: a piece of paper and put it in the god jar.
Speaker 1: And if it came up again, literally on the spot,
Speaker 1: I would say, oh, that's in the godjar. It's not
Speaker 1: my job, that's a god job. And I had to
Speaker 1: literally walk around with a little pad of paper and
Speaker 1: I'd write stuff down and fold it up. When I
Speaker 1: got back home, I'd put it in the god jar.
Speaker 1: I still have it. I still have my godjab. That
Speaker 1: might be something you want to work with. And if
Speaker 1: you don't want to do it at the physical level,
Speaker 1: do it in your mind. Create a box of light
Speaker 1: or a holy what ever in your mind. And when
Speaker 1: things are disturbing you, distressing you, upsetting it, put it
Speaker 1: in the god jar. And the intention of the god
Speaker 1: jar is to take it off your plate and put
Speaker 1: it in God's hands. I don't care inflation, political corruption,
Speaker 1: which you said, social injustice. Put it in the god jar.
Speaker 1: And those are things that you can also include in
Speaker 1: your prayer. You can lift them up. So that's one
Speaker 1: thing that you can do so that you're doing your work,
Speaker 1: taking care of yourself, inviting God into the process, and
Speaker 1: taking some things off your mind. Because like I said,
Speaker 1: you say I think a lot as opposed to I know.
Speaker 1: Does that make sense to you? Yes, you might want
Speaker 1: yeah it does, Okay, Well make you a godjar.
Speaker 2: I would definitely do that.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, my love.
Speaker 2: I could sit here and listen to you all day,
Speaker 2: but I have to return to work. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2: Put it in the God jar now you supposed it.
Speaker 1: Okay, Bye bye. I wonder how many of us out
Speaker 1: there need a God jar where we can put our concerns,
Speaker 1: our worries, our troubles, our judgments are against this about
Speaker 1: what we see in the world. We can put it
Speaker 1: in the God jar and understand it's a God job
Speaker 1: and there's nothing we need to do about it. I
Speaker 1: know that may sound silly, but sometimes to have a
Speaker 1: physical representation of it helps us to process through it.
Speaker 1: I can now do it in my mind. I have
Speaker 1: a purse in my brain. This is the Holy Spirit purse,
Speaker 1: and I'm putting this in the Holy Spirits purse. I'm
Speaker 1: filling your purse up, Holy Spirit. I'm hearing this thing,
Speaker 1: you know for me right now. It's about Haiti. Every
Speaker 1: day I've got some you know, traumatic thought about Haiti,
Speaker 1: and every day I put it in the Holy Spirits purse.
Speaker 1: Feed the babies, calm the streets down, make sure the
Speaker 1: pregnant women have food. Today, Holy spirit and I put
Speaker 1: that in the in the holy spirits person, I don't
Speaker 1: think about it, but for years I had a god
Speaker 1: jar where I would write stuff down on my little
Speaker 1: sticky notes and put it in the god jar. Yes,
Speaker 1: there is a lot going on in the world and
Speaker 1: it does impact us, and we owe it to ourselves.
Speaker 1: You owe it to yourself. I owe it to myself
Speaker 1: to take care of me first, because some of what's
Speaker 1: going on with people, it's none of my business. My
Speaker 1: business is to be as strong and it's centered, as
Speaker 1: grounded as I possibly can be, moment by moment, so
Speaker 1: that if some one shows up in my life that
Speaker 1: needs help, support, encouragement, that I can be a great
Speaker 1: Bible for them to read in the moment. And some
Speaker 1: of us don't even have the problems and the concerns,
Speaker 1: but we're worrying about it for other people, not knowing
Speaker 1: that all things are working out toward good. I don't
Speaker 1: understand what good is going to come out of Ukraine
Speaker 1: and Russia or Israel and Gaza. I don't understand who's
Speaker 1: in the Hamas and do they have mothers and did
Speaker 1: their mother teach a manners? You know, I don't understand that.
Speaker 1: But I can put that in the Holy Spirit's purse
Speaker 1: and ask for understanding, Ask how I should be with it.
Speaker 1: Ask here's my prayer about it. And it's because everybody thinks,
Speaker 1: as a lowly human being that they have control, that
Speaker 1: they're in charge, and that the way they see it
Speaker 1: and the way they want it is the way it is.
Speaker 1: So if ten people do it, it's one thing. If
Speaker 1: twenty people do it, it's another thing. But when thousands
Speaker 1: of people are each holding the same idea, if things
Speaker 1: are the way I see them, things have to be
Speaker 1: the way I want them. Things have to be done
Speaker 1: the way I think they should be done. Well, now
Speaker 1: we've got the world that we're in, you know, I
Speaker 1: think what's going on in the world can give us
Speaker 1: the invitation and the opportunity to be more conscious and
Speaker 1: purposeful and selective about what we take on, how we
Speaker 1: take it on, and what we do with it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I hope you've heard something today that you can
Speaker 1: use in your own life and that you will put
Speaker 1: it to practice. Because we're in this world together. The
Speaker 1: beloved philosopher Algiau told us that we're in the this
Speaker 1: world together. He said, in this love, we're in this
Speaker 1: love together in a time that will last forever. Know
Speaker 1: that I love you today and I really invite you
Speaker 1: to stay in peace and not pieces. I'll see you
Speaker 1: next time. Bye, favor. The R Spot is a production
Speaker 1: of Shondaland Audio in partnership with iHeartRadio. For more podcasts
Speaker 1: from Shondaland Audio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
Speaker 1: wherever you listen to your favorite shows.