WEBVTT - DONKEY: JD Vance Admits To Creating Stories When Asked About Immigrants Eating Pets

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, you are trust Trump when Mexico sentenced you're not

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<v Speaker 1>sending their best to bring drugs.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, Donkey.

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<v Speaker 3>Today from Monday, September sixteenth goes to a man who

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<v Speaker 3>could potentially be Vice President of the United States of America.

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<v Speaker 2>JD. Vance.

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<v Speaker 3>At some point we are going to have to realize

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<v Speaker 3>that JD may stand for James David, but it also

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<v Speaker 3>might stand for just dumb, may even stand for jackass.

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<v Speaker 2>Donkey.

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<v Speaker 3>This guy is the weapon formed against Donald Trump. If

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<v Speaker 3>any pastor ever says to Trump, no weapon formed against

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<v Speaker 3>you will prosper I will scream by humbug and tell

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<v Speaker 3>him look to his vice presidential running mate.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay.

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<v Speaker 4>JD.

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<v Speaker 3>Vans is the reason why I now understand why vice

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<v Speaker 3>presidents are better off scene and not heard. Last time

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<v Speaker 3>I saw a VP heard a candidate like JD Vance

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<v Speaker 3>hurts Trump, and it's not like Trump needs any help

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<v Speaker 3>hurting himself. Her name was Sarah Palin, but JD Vance

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<v Speaker 3>he makes Sarah Pelin look like Michelle Obama.

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<v Speaker 2>Now I'm gonna give jd Vance some credit.

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<v Speaker 3>He is on all these Sunday morning news shows, unscripted,

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<v Speaker 3>answering any questions they throw in them. I need to

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<v Speaker 3>see more of that from Harrison Wallas. It's one thing

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<v Speaker 3>to do interviews, but you can't be resorting to all

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<v Speaker 3>your talking points, Madam Vice President, because all eyes are

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<v Speaker 3>on you, and when folks hear you repeating some of

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<v Speaker 3>the same stories over and over, it starts to feel

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<v Speaker 3>like it's not authentic. So that is where jd vanced

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<v Speaker 3>them have a slight advantage, except for the fact that

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<v Speaker 3>I'm sure there are plenty of Republicans, Okay, plenty of

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<v Speaker 3>people who wish jd Vance would shut the hell upever,

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<v Speaker 3>who wish jd Vance would be on a script, Okay,

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<v Speaker 3>would have some talking points, because when he wins it,

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<v Speaker 3>oh boy, he says things like this.

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<v Speaker 2>See.

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<v Speaker 3>Jd Vance was on CNN State of the Union and

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<v Speaker 3>Dana Bash asked him about the claims he made in

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<v Speaker 3>regards to Haitians eating pets. You remember the whole Haitians

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<v Speaker 3>eating pets thing. Right, Let's listen. Listen to Trump on

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<v Speaker 3>the debate stage repeating that lie.

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<v Speaker 1>Ken Springfield, they're eating the dogs, the people that came in,

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<v Speaker 1>they're eating the cats, they're eating they're eating the pets.

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<v Speaker 4>There's there's there's a there's a nice little bop by

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<v Speaker 4>the way that somebody made it is a bop, you

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<v Speaker 4>hear me, But yes, j D said he felt the

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<v Speaker 4>need to create stories so that the media actually pays

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<v Speaker 4>attention to the suffering of the American people.

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<v Speaker 2>He admitted he just kind of made it all up.

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<v Speaker 3>I can't make this kind of stuff up, and I

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<v Speaker 3>wouldn't because I'm not Jade Bans.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's go to CNN State of the Union for the report.

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<v Speaker 5>Police, can you affirmatively say now that that is a

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<v Speaker 5>rumor that has no base basis with evidence, Dana.

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<v Speaker 6>The evidence is the first hand account of my constituents

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<v Speaker 6>who are telling me that this happened. And by the way,

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<v Speaker 6>I've been trying to talk about the problems in Springfield

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<v Speaker 6>for months, and the American media ignored it. There was

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<v Speaker 6>a congressional hearing just last week of angel moms who

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<v Speaker 6>lost children because Kamala Harris let criminal migrants into this

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<v Speaker 6>country who then murder their children. The American media totally

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<v Speaker 6>ignored this stuff until Donald Trump and I start talking

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<v Speaker 6>about cat memes. If I have to create stories so

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<v Speaker 6>that the American media actually pays attention to the suffering

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<v Speaker 6>of the American people, then That's what I'm gonna do, Dana,

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<v Speaker 6>because you guys are completely letting Kamala Harris coast.

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<v Speaker 5>You just said that this is a story that you

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<v Speaker 5>created so that the eating dog we are not.

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<v Speaker 6>We are creating. I say that we're creating a story,

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<v Speaker 6>meaning we're creating the American media focusing on it.

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<v Speaker 3>If I have to create stories so that the media

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<v Speaker 3>actually pays attention to the suffering of the American people,

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<v Speaker 3>I will. This is why you can't trust anyone except

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<v Speaker 3>for me, because I tell you, I tell you that

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<v Speaker 3>you should believe me even though I'm lying.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay.

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<v Speaker 3>Ryan Holliday wrote a fantastic book that everyone should read

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<v Speaker 3>called Trust Me.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm lying and that is me. Okay, that should be

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<v Speaker 2>all of us.

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<v Speaker 3>I will tell you that I'm lying because I want

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<v Speaker 3>to give you the choice on whether you should believe

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<v Speaker 3>this lie or not. I know you are probably gonna

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<v Speaker 3>believe me anyway because you want to, all Right.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the same.

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<v Speaker 3>Reason the FDA puts warning labels on cigarettes, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>and they tell you these things cause cancer, but you

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<v Speaker 3>smoke anyway.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay. You should always give people the choice. JD. Vance

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<v Speaker 2>did not JD.

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<v Speaker 3>Van say that he wants to bring attention to the

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<v Speaker 3>large Haitian population that is here in Springfield illegally.

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<v Speaker 2>Can I tell you the truth of the matter of America.

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<v Speaker 3>The vast majority of Haitians are in the US in

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<v Speaker 3>Springfield legally through a temporary protected status that has been

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<v Speaker 3>allocated to them due to the violence and unrest in

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<v Speaker 3>their home country, and their status must be renewed after

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<v Speaker 3>eighteen months. You know how I know this because I

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<v Speaker 3>read Okay, it's not complicated. All you have to do

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<v Speaker 3>is read past the headline. Yeah, I'm old school guys.

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<v Speaker 3>I was born in nineteen hundred and seventy eight. I

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<v Speaker 3>still read the whole article in, not just the headline. Now,

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<v Speaker 3>let me tell you what Jdvance's rumor has caused. Bomb

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<v Speaker 3>threats aimed at local hospitals and government offices. And jd

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<v Speaker 3>Vance doesn't want to get any credit for that.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's listen.

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<v Speaker 5>You're not just a bystander. You're the senator from Ohio.

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<v Speaker 5>So instead of saying things that are wrong and actually

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<v Speaker 5>causing the hospitals, the schools, the government buildings to be

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<v Speaker 5>evacuated because of bomb threats, because of the cats and

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<v Speaker 5>dogs thing, why not actually be constructive and helping to

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<v Speaker 5>better integrate them into the community.

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<v Speaker 6>First of all, let me just respond to a couple

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<v Speaker 6>of things that you said. But I want to start

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<v Speaker 6>with something you said which I think is frankly disgusting

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<v Speaker 6>and is more appropriate for a democratic propagandist than it

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<v Speaker 6>is for an American journalist. There is nothing that I

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<v Speaker 6>have said that has led to threats against these hospitals.

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<v Speaker 6>These hospitals, the bomb threats and so forth. It's disgusting.

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<v Speaker 6>The violence is disgusting. We condemn it. We condemn all.

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<v Speaker 5>Violence under This happened after you and you asked.

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<v Speaker 6>A question, Dan, and I go ahead and answer it.

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<v Speaker 6>You just accused me of inciting violence against the community,

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<v Speaker 6>when all that I've done is surface the complaints of

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<v Speaker 6>my constituents.

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<v Speaker 3>Jdvans, you are the same person who, after Donald Trump

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<v Speaker 3>got shot at the first time, okay, the first attempt

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<v Speaker 3>on his life, you tweeted the central premise of the

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<v Speaker 3>Biden campaign is that President Donald Trump is an authoritarian,

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<v Speaker 3>fastest who must be stopped.

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<v Speaker 2>At all costs.

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<v Speaker 3>That rhetoric led directly to President Trump's attempted assassination. You

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<v Speaker 3>tweeted that Jdvans almost immediately after someone tried to take

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<v Speaker 3>Trump out the first time. So, if you believe rhetoric

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<v Speaker 3>can lead to things like attempted assassination attempts, why don't

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<v Speaker 3>you think your rhetoric could lead to bomb threats on

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<v Speaker 3>local hospitals and government offices. Why don't you believe your

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<v Speaker 3>rhetoric could lead to people trying to hurt Haitians not

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<v Speaker 3>just in Springfield, but all around the country.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's the thing about America.

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<v Speaker 3>There is enough real issues going on in this country

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<v Speaker 3>that we don't have to put no sauce on a JD. Okay,

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<v Speaker 3>this is the first time in my life that I

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<v Speaker 3>am actually encouraging a white person not to put seasoning on.

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<v Speaker 2>It's onto something.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, you don't have to when you are actually focused

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<v Speaker 3>on the issues. When you aren't focused on the issue,

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<v Speaker 3>you have to deflect and distract with silly ass stories

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<v Speaker 3>like this.

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<v Speaker 2>JD.

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<v Speaker 3>Stop playing with the American people's realities and more importantly,

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<v Speaker 3>stop playing with their lives. Please please give JD vance

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<v Speaker 3>the biggest he hull. In fact, letd Chelsea Handler give

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<v Speaker 3>a JD Vance the biggest he hull.

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<v Speaker 7>Hee haw hee haw.

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<v Speaker 2>That is way too much, Dan mayonnaise, too much mayonnaise.

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<v Speaker 2>They don't going to trouble for that, just like making

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<v Speaker 2>stuff like a million's just like making stuff up. They've

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<v Speaker 2>been doing it for the last what ten years? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>But like I don't know, it just feels, you know.

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<v Speaker 7>Donald Trump at one time said if you drink bleach,

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<v Speaker 7>it'll kill COVID.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and that should have been a crime. It should

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<v Speaker 2>be a crime. But as we have learned in this country, Uh,

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<v Speaker 2>this country.

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<v Speaker 3>Has no actual rules, our regulations, our laws, or even

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<v Speaker 3>knows how to handle people like the Donald Trump's and

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<v Speaker 3>the JD. Vances of the world they have. They don't

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<v Speaker 3>even know how to deal with that type of privilege.

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<v Speaker 3>But I will say this, speaking of dealing with it

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<v Speaker 3>all my Haitian brothers and sisters, what y'all waiting on?

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<v Speaker 4>Man?

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<v Speaker 2>You still need a piece Do you need a piece

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<v Speaker 2>of JD. Vance's here? A fingernail? Maybe?

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<v Speaker 3>Can't use a piece of piece of Trump's head would

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<v Speaker 3>be a waste of good wasted some good voodoo because

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<v Speaker 3>that's a two pey, all right, But it's time for

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<v Speaker 3>someone to call up a frog. See, white privilege is strong,

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<v Speaker 3>black magic is stronger.

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<v Speaker 2>All right? Come on, all right, you know what to do.

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<v Speaker 7>Salut to all my Hastians out there. I was, I

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<v Speaker 7>was talking to you know. My best friend is DJ

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<v Speaker 7>Mono Renning. He's haitiing and I spoke to him this weekend.

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<v Speaker 7>He said, Yo, bro, do you know how many times

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<v Speaker 7>I have to tell people that I'm not trying to

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<v Speaker 7>eat their pets?

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<v Speaker 2>He was like, people really come to me and ask me?

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<v Speaker 2>Which is crazy? People coming to me asking me with

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<v Speaker 2>my under arms? You got some apologizing about what you

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<v Speaker 2>made cha? Ferry you under arms? Furry is the same thing,

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<v Speaker 2>Lord Jesus Christ. All right.

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<v Speaker 3>Donkey Today is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney Michael

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<v Speaker 3>to Bull, Lamb and Soft.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't be a donkey. You need a fighter on your side.

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<v Speaker 2>If you're ever injured, go to Michael to bull dot com.

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<v Speaker 2>That's Michael to bull dot com. And when you mess

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<v Speaker 2>with the bull, you get the horns. Wake that ass

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<v Speaker 2>up in the morning. The Breakfast Club