WEBVTT - Coping with Addiction During Coronavirus 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:02.480 Hey, fam I'm Jada Pinkett Smith and this is the 0:00:02.480 --> 0:00:05.840 Red Table Pop podcast, all your favorite episodes from the 0:00:05.840 --> 0:00:10.040 Facebook watch show in audio produced by Westbrook Audio and 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:13.120 I Heart Radio. Please don't forget to rate and review 0:00:13.400 --> 0:00:18.079 on Apple podcasts on this Red Table Talk. This happens 0:00:18.120 --> 0:00:20.400 to be a topic that is very close to home. 0:00:21.320 --> 0:00:26.040 Help for millions struggling with addiction during the coronavirus crisis 0:00:26.840 --> 0:00:31.640 gave me was a heroin attic. The quarantine actually put 0:00:31.720 --> 0:00:34.479 me back in touch with going to meetings because I 0:00:34.479 --> 0:00:38.920 started to go online. The thing that shocked me was 0:00:39.000 --> 0:00:43.560 when you said that you had overdosed a few times. Wait, 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:45.920 it's been a long time since I've had a drink, 0:00:46.000 --> 0:00:50.519 but old emotional habits try to creep back in. An 0:00:50.520 --> 0:00:54.640 addiction specialist answers your questions. I literally left rehab and 0:00:54.720 --> 0:00:57.560 that day was when this whole pandemic started to happen, 0:00:57.640 --> 0:00:59.720 and I was not there for that at all. Well 0:01:00.040 --> 0:01:05.840 through some drugs, smoking alcohol to overeating, I'm seeing a 0:01:05.959 --> 0:01:10.920 lot of people having a lot of struggle around absolute food. 0:01:11.560 --> 0:01:15.000 I can feel your anxiety coming through. If you are 0:01:15.080 --> 0:01:18.040 anyone you know needs help, this is an important Red 0:01:18.040 --> 0:01:23.039 Table Talk God grant me the serenity to accept the 0:01:23.080 --> 0:01:26.360 things I cannot change the current to change of things 0:01:26.400 --> 0:01:37.280 I can. Here we are, how's everyone doing out there? 0:01:38.200 --> 0:01:41.959 I know this is our quarantine time, and it's tough. 0:01:42.520 --> 0:01:45.839 We've decided to come to the table today to talk 0:01:45.880 --> 0:01:51.160 about addiction and how to deal with addictions of all kinds. 0:01:51.560 --> 0:01:55.120 Doing the time, this is the pandemic. Yeah, and doing 0:01:55.160 --> 0:01:58.600 this quarantine, which is super tough. It happens to be 0:01:58.680 --> 0:02:01.680 a topic that is very close to home for us. 0:02:02.360 --> 0:02:05.520 As some of you may know, gave me was a 0:02:05.560 --> 0:02:09.000 heroin attic. Gam has been in recovery now for how 0:02:09.040 --> 0:02:14.519 long twenty nine years? So I'm actually years. I celebrated 0:02:14.600 --> 0:02:17.639 twenty nine years in December, so I'm in my thirtieth year. 0:02:17.800 --> 0:02:23.240 You're in your year. It's been a long time since 0:02:23.360 --> 0:02:30.000 I've had to rely on going to meetings daily. The quarantine, 0:02:30.360 --> 0:02:33.440 believe it or not. Putting me back in touch with 0:02:33.639 --> 0:02:36.520 going to meet my sponsor called me and let me 0:02:36.600 --> 0:02:40.080 know that there were meetings online, and I actually went 0:02:40.200 --> 0:02:44.200 to my old home group back in Baltimore, and I'm 0:02:44.240 --> 0:02:49.000 telling you it was such such a good feeling. You 0:02:49.080 --> 0:02:53.679 kind of forget the importance of one attic helping another, right, 0:02:54.040 --> 0:02:56.680 I mean it was like being back home, right, you know. 0:02:56.720 --> 0:02:59.240 It was just such a good feeling to connect with 0:02:59.360 --> 0:03:04.480 people like me that understood what was going on, sharing 0:03:04.520 --> 0:03:08.960 the same feelings and experiences. It's just so important people 0:03:09.000 --> 0:03:12.639 are struggling out here. Here's the thing that shocked me 0:03:12.960 --> 0:03:17.400 this morning was when you said you had overdosed a 0:03:17.440 --> 0:03:21.800 few times. Wait, so you like, we mean, oh, yeah, 0:03:21.840 --> 0:03:26.200 like overdosed a few times. Yeah, that's part of being 0:03:26.240 --> 0:03:29.160 a drug addict. I can remember getting out of treatment 0:03:29.639 --> 0:03:33.640 and them wanting to put me on some kind of 0:03:33.720 --> 0:03:38.080 drug that was going to block the effects of the 0:03:38.160 --> 0:03:41.800 heroine and if I tried to go over to get 0:03:41.880 --> 0:03:47.400 past that block that, you know, I would potentially o 0:03:47.600 --> 0:03:52.640 d And I was like, you think that's gonna stop me? Like, 0:03:52.760 --> 0:03:54.720 that's that's not going to stop me from doing anything 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:58.200 odd a couple of times, so that was not a 0:03:58.200 --> 0:04:02.360 big deal to me. I knew in my heart that 0:04:02.560 --> 0:04:05.960 I had to want to change my life, that there 0:04:06.040 --> 0:04:10.000 wasn't a drug that was gonna stop me. I had 0:04:10.040 --> 0:04:12.920 to stop me, like I got to get this on 0:04:12.960 --> 0:04:16.640 my own. When you say overdose, because when I think 0:04:16.640 --> 0:04:20.880 of overdose, I think you're you can't, you're not responsib 0:04:20.880 --> 0:04:23.120 to bring you around. Somebody has to bring you around. 0:04:24.640 --> 0:04:29.320 So that's what happened to you. So how did they 0:04:29.320 --> 0:04:32.000 bring you around? One time they like put me in 0:04:32.040 --> 0:04:35.120 a tub of cold water. One time they put a 0:04:35.640 --> 0:04:38.440 lighter to my finger and just burn my finger to 0:04:38.560 --> 0:04:42.800 try to bring me around. Sometimes you come out of it, 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:45.520 and sometimes you don't. Well, all I can say is 0:04:45.640 --> 0:04:50.839 holloween for twenty nine years exactly because when you carry, 0:04:51.279 --> 0:04:53.240 when you're caught up, you don't you don't think of 0:04:53.360 --> 0:04:55.159 you don't You're not thinking about all that. You're just 0:04:55.160 --> 0:04:58.680 trying to get high. Willow. I'm really proud of you 0:04:59.080 --> 0:05:04.880 as well because you have decided to curb your excessive 0:05:04.960 --> 0:05:11.360 weed smoking exactly. Hallelu hallelu I mean you always were 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:14.000 telling me. You would be like, I gotta stop that smoking. 0:05:14.120 --> 0:05:20.240 You would always think only because as your mother I 0:05:20.279 --> 0:05:24.280 could see the effects of it that you couldn't exactly 0:05:24.320 --> 0:05:27.919 and now and for me it was like with the 0:05:28.040 --> 0:05:30.560 history that we have in our family, don't drive me. 0:05:30.600 --> 0:05:32.800 It was driving me crazy because all we could think 0:05:32.800 --> 0:05:35.400 about is that it's a gate to something else. Yeah, 0:05:35.440 --> 0:05:40.600 I have haven't been smoking marijuana for three months. Specifically, 0:05:41.640 --> 0:05:45.560 when I stopped smoking, it was a really big like 0:05:45.760 --> 0:05:48.480 eye opener because I was like, there are so many people, 0:05:48.520 --> 0:05:51.200 like people that I called friends in my life who 0:05:51.320 --> 0:05:55.080 just kind of like you know what I mean. And 0:05:55.120 --> 0:05:58.440 I was like, really made me think, like this is 0:05:58.800 --> 0:06:01.280 really interesting. You know, there's a lot of social it's 0:06:01.440 --> 0:06:03.960 very social. I mean for me it was. For me, 0:06:04.000 --> 0:06:06.680 it was it was like you know when you're young 0:06:06.839 --> 0:06:09.200 and you're with your friends and it's like, you know what, 0:06:09.440 --> 0:06:11.440 you know what I mean, it's like you don't think 0:06:11.440 --> 0:06:13.480 anything of it, and I know it sounds so cheesy, 0:06:13.600 --> 0:06:15.919 but it's like around the time I stopped smoking, I 0:06:15.960 --> 0:06:19.080 started doing a lot of yoga and I just excelled 0:06:19.320 --> 0:06:22.440 because I was putting all of my energy into that, 0:06:22.520 --> 0:06:24.960 like I wasn't doing anything else. And I was like, wow, 0:06:25.000 --> 0:06:29.719 what if I was doing this with everything, you know 0:06:29.760 --> 0:06:31.320 what I mean? And then it really made me think, 0:06:31.320 --> 0:06:34.880 like what have I been missing? What have I been 0:06:35.040 --> 0:06:40.320 um not putting my all into or not putting like 0:06:40.400 --> 0:06:43.200 all of my brain power into For everyone, it's different, 0:06:43.240 --> 0:06:48.520 like for some people marijuana doesn't affect them like now 0:06:48.640 --> 0:06:52.640 I see it affected me, and even like like I had. 0:06:52.640 --> 0:06:54.839 How do you see how it affected you though? When 0:06:54.839 --> 0:06:57.840 you when you look at yourself today and then you 0:06:57.920 --> 0:07:01.160 look at you then when you were I'll say smoking 0:07:01.240 --> 0:07:04.520 excessively because I do think that that plant can be helpful. 0:07:05.000 --> 0:07:08.600 It is a medicine for a lot of people, definitely, 0:07:08.720 --> 0:07:12.240 and it raises quality of life for a lot of people. Sure, um, 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:15.040 but when it's not something that is like you need 0:07:15.080 --> 0:07:17.720 it medically and you're just using it like for me, 0:07:17.920 --> 0:07:21.640 like maybe like you know once every two weeks or 0:07:21.640 --> 0:07:23.760 whatever is a vibe, but like for me it was like, 0:07:25.040 --> 0:07:29.440 yes it was, but like anything else, if you abuse it, yeah, 0:07:29.680 --> 0:07:32.880 it's not helpful exactly right. And I feel like people 0:07:32.960 --> 0:07:34.960 think because it comes out of the ground, you can't 0:07:34.960 --> 0:07:40.400 abuse it. Yeah, heroin comes out. Heroin comes out of 0:07:40.440 --> 0:07:43.680 the ground too. So what have you seen that's different? 0:07:44.600 --> 0:07:49.560 Less anxious? Which is anxious? Who would have thought that's ridiculous. 0:07:49.760 --> 0:07:54.120 I never understood that smoking would actually make me more anxious. 0:07:55.000 --> 0:08:00.640 You feel like you're more productive one when I was bored, 0:08:00.640 --> 0:08:04.000 I would just smoke. Now because of this quarantine board 0:08:04.080 --> 0:08:07.400 all the time, but I'm putting my energy into different things. 0:08:08.280 --> 0:08:10.920 So when you're ready to stop using you've got to 0:08:10.920 --> 0:08:14.760 be ready for a whole new lifestyle exactly and knowing 0:08:14.800 --> 0:08:19.200 exactly why that you're doing that, because for me, I 0:08:19.240 --> 0:08:24.160 realized it's the um oral fixation. Like it's not even 0:08:24.200 --> 0:08:27.520 really the getting high, it's the like oral fixation of 0:08:27.560 --> 0:08:32.600 like just smoking that I really enjoyed. So now starting 0:08:32.679 --> 0:08:35.840 to like figure out, Okay, like utilizing CBD in different ways, 0:08:35.880 --> 0:08:38.160 it's not psychoactive, but because I've been working out so 0:08:38.240 --> 0:08:41.560 much helps your muscles, it helps all these other different things. 0:08:41.559 --> 0:08:45.640 So I'm like, maybe I can just saciate that in 0:08:45.679 --> 0:08:49.640 different ways that aren't psychoactive, that are like dumbing me down. Basically, 0:08:50.240 --> 0:08:53.880 did it help at all? When I just kept going, hey, 0:08:54.360 --> 0:08:56.839 I need you to see this, I mean, or did 0:08:56.880 --> 0:08:59.600 it make you go you don't know what you're talking about? 0:09:00.160 --> 0:09:02.559 This is the thing. It's not that it didn't make 0:09:02.600 --> 0:09:06.000 sense because now I see what you were saying. But 0:09:06.640 --> 0:09:09.160 before I was like, because my biggest thing was like 0:09:09.520 --> 0:09:14.360 I would understand if I was like not productive, not productive, 0:09:14.360 --> 0:09:16.600 if I wasn't working, and if I wasn't like making 0:09:16.640 --> 0:09:20.520 an effort in supporting yourself exactly, then I could see 0:09:20.520 --> 0:09:23.240 how it would be like But that was my um. 0:09:23.520 --> 0:09:27.120 That was my justification of being like, oh, like, I'm 0:09:27.160 --> 0:09:29.520 doing all this so at the end of the day, 0:09:29.640 --> 0:09:33.120 as a parent, you did what you were supposed exactly 0:09:33.440 --> 0:09:37.640 because in the law rung it does she is going 0:09:37.679 --> 0:09:40.720 to remember that. I think that the more aggressive you are, 0:09:41.120 --> 0:09:44.080 the more the kid's going to go. But if you 0:09:44.160 --> 0:09:47.320 think that a parent tries to talk to their child 0:09:47.360 --> 0:09:49.959 in a way of like, hey, this is what I see, 0:09:50.200 --> 0:09:53.240 I know you have to make decisions for yourself. I'm afraid, 0:09:53.720 --> 0:09:56.800 you know, because I look at this as one day, 0:09:56.840 --> 0:09:59.840 this isn't gonna be enough. But by going to something heavy, 0:10:00.880 --> 0:10:02.960 to me, that sounds like because this is the thing. 0:10:03.440 --> 0:10:06.679 I might be a little immature, but I'm not like 0:10:06.800 --> 0:10:09.520 off the wagon. No, But I'm not trying to hurt myself, 0:10:10.080 --> 0:10:11.640 you know what I mean. We don't have to think 0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:13.440 we're trying to hurt ourselves and we're just trying to 0:10:13.440 --> 0:10:16.360 have me either, trying to have a good time. Yep, 0:10:16.520 --> 0:10:18.080 that's all I was trying to do was have a 0:10:18.120 --> 0:10:20.200 good time, you know. And I'm just trying to have 0:10:20.280 --> 0:10:23.200 a good time. I know what bloodline you come from, 0:10:23.840 --> 0:10:27.880 so I was just in there deep. I would just 0:10:27.920 --> 0:10:31.080 say to you, Hey, you're losing your shine. You're losing 0:10:31.080 --> 0:10:33.480 your glows. Like you could be doing even more than 0:10:33.520 --> 0:10:35.880 what you're doing now, you know, you could be doing 0:10:35.920 --> 0:10:37.559 more of the things that you really want to do. 0:10:38.480 --> 0:10:41.640 What would be your suggestion for young people that are 0:10:41.760 --> 0:10:47.840 quarantined at this time that are serious smokers, right, who 0:10:47.920 --> 0:10:50.960 might decide, Wow, I don't want to do this anymore. 0:10:51.040 --> 0:10:55.600 I just really think about, like what is the first 0:10:55.679 --> 0:10:59.600 thought in your head before you smoke? Like, what is 0:10:59.679 --> 0:11:02.640 your first thought? And if and if that's like a 0:11:02.679 --> 0:11:04.880 thought of like stress or I thought of using it 0:11:04.920 --> 0:11:07.640 as a crutch in any way, try to think about 0:11:07.640 --> 0:11:11.400 that and if that comes from a negative place, examine 0:11:11.440 --> 0:11:14.480 that because if it comes from a negative place, if 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:17.559 you're trying to run from something, that could just snowball. 0:11:18.160 --> 0:11:20.880 And just think about what are some other things that 0:11:20.960 --> 0:11:27.040 you could utilize that aren't physically or mentally dampening. Like 0:11:27.160 --> 0:11:30.560 how did you how did you know? No? No, how 0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:35.520 how did you start stopping? Yeah, start stopping your excessive smoking? Um, 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:38.800 I got rid of all of everything, Like I got 0:11:38.880 --> 0:11:42.600 rid of everything that I could smoke with okay, and 0:11:42.679 --> 0:11:46.600 smoke after that, it was like okay, Like now if 0:11:46.640 --> 0:11:48.319 I want to smoke, I'm going to have to make 0:11:48.320 --> 0:11:50.920 an effort, you know what I mean, And then making 0:11:50.920 --> 0:11:53.240 that effort is going to make me feel like this 0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:56.880 is kind of going to make exactly So that would 0:11:56.920 --> 0:11:59.320 be my first thing, second thing for my health, and 0:11:59.480 --> 0:12:05.439 especially now because COVID is a respiratory thing. I'm really 0:12:05.480 --> 0:12:09.440 glad that um I stopped when I did, because it 0:12:09.480 --> 0:12:11.720 does make you more vulnerable. You would explain it to 0:12:11.800 --> 0:12:14.240 me also that you have a routine. When you wake up, 0:12:14.360 --> 0:12:18.320 you know what you're doing, especially now when we got 0:12:18.320 --> 0:12:20.240 to stay in our house. I wake up, I do 0:12:20.320 --> 0:12:23.040 my hour and thirty minutes of yoga. I've been trying 0:12:23.080 --> 0:12:25.640 to get fluent in Spanish, so take a shower after that, 0:12:25.679 --> 0:12:27.920 I'm like doing my Spanish work. You have to fill 0:12:27.960 --> 0:12:30.480 your days with things that I'm meaningful to think that 0:12:30.520 --> 0:12:33.280 I'm angry to you that like occupy your mind. I 0:12:33.320 --> 0:12:37.160 remember when I was first getting clean too, which happened 0:12:37.200 --> 0:12:40.520 many times. I was like a revolving door over for 0:12:40.559 --> 0:12:45.600 a while. But a routine was really important and I 0:12:45.720 --> 0:12:49.360 had to have a plan for my day. I'm still 0:12:49.559 --> 0:12:51.880 very routine. I still have to have a plan for 0:12:51.920 --> 0:12:53.880 my day. If I don't have a plan, and I 0:12:53.920 --> 0:12:58.720 feel a little Yeah exactly, I'm not that spontaneous and 0:12:58.920 --> 0:13:01.760 people need to know where I am and what I'm doing. 0:13:01.960 --> 0:13:06.120 I could not have free time to myself and just 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:09.600 be rolling and just be rolling. No, because if I'm rolling, 0:13:10.559 --> 0:13:13.520 you don't know where I'm going. I'm going over here, 0:13:14.280 --> 0:13:17.120 I'm going there. In popular growth, I don't need you, 0:13:17.160 --> 0:13:20.400 don't need somebody to help you stay accountable. Yes, And 0:13:20.440 --> 0:13:22.520 I think that that's what I would share with people 0:13:22.559 --> 0:13:25.240 out here when they can't get to a meeting. It's 0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:29.760 about being connected to people, because just because you can't 0:13:29.800 --> 0:13:33.440 physically be near people, you can still be connected to people. 0:13:33.880 --> 0:13:38.920 And I'm telling you these online meetings are extremely helpful 0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:42.120 because you can opt to see people or not. You 0:13:42.160 --> 0:13:45.320 can have the video on or not, so you feel 0:13:45.320 --> 0:13:47.960 like you're at a meeting. That's great. That it is 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:51.560 just as powerful. It's just as powerful. I will say 0:13:51.559 --> 0:13:56.360 that as your mother, I see that you are far 0:13:56.600 --> 0:14:05.479 more emotionally balanced. Definitely, and you remain a more constant 0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:09.400 good place or I feel like when you were smoking, 0:14:09.440 --> 0:14:15.480 you were on a complete up and down the Yeah. Definitely, Yeah, 0:14:15.520 --> 0:14:18.880 So kudos to you. I'm so proud of you. Yeah, yeah, 0:14:19.080 --> 0:14:24.080 I'm proud of you. I'm really proud. So joining us 0:14:24.240 --> 0:14:27.720 is Dr Mike dow. He is a family therapist and 0:14:27.800 --> 0:14:32.000 psychotherapist specializing in addictions of all kinds. We know a 0:14:32.040 --> 0:14:37.120 lot of people are out there struggling, whether it's with food, alcohol, 0:14:37.960 --> 0:14:41.800 or drugs during this particular time. Yeah, peop are really 0:14:41.800 --> 0:14:43.720 starting to feel the effects. Is because this is a 0:14:43.760 --> 0:14:46.080 hard time. You know, when you have the disease of 0:14:46.120 --> 0:14:50.520 addiction present. Um, what's at stake is their life, right, 0:14:50.600 --> 0:14:54.080 and you have something like a severe stressor like this pandemic, 0:14:54.440 --> 0:14:57.320 you're gonna see that this this this disease is really 0:14:57.360 --> 0:14:59.520 going to surface and come out in full force. Yeah. 0:14:59.560 --> 0:15:02.000 I have to agree because even I mean with me, 0:15:02.040 --> 0:15:03.880 it's it's been a long time since I've had a 0:15:03.960 --> 0:15:08.240 drink or anything. But it's so funny because old emotional 0:15:08.320 --> 0:15:11.960 habits try to creep back in and that's been a 0:15:12.000 --> 0:15:14.120 trip because I haven't had to deal with that in 0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:18.200 a long time. But like you know, old emotional habits 0:15:18.200 --> 0:15:22.240 that you would use to justify. Let me just get 0:15:22.240 --> 0:15:24.200 out of bottle of wine and just kicking you know 0:15:24.240 --> 0:15:27.080 what I mean, just knowing that oh no, not you, 0:15:27.440 --> 0:15:29.800 because you know that one bottle will turn into two 0:15:29.920 --> 0:15:32.880 and then you'll be back to three. So Andrew and 0:15:32.960 --> 0:15:36.400 Long Island, New York, has a question. What's going on? Andrew? 0:15:36.720 --> 0:15:39.960 My name is Andrew. Obviously um dirty years old. I've 0:15:39.960 --> 0:15:42.800 been dealing with heroin and opiate addiction since I was 0:15:42.840 --> 0:15:45.840 twenty three. As of today, I'm thirty four days clean. 0:15:45.960 --> 0:15:51.240 I literally left UM graduation. I left rehab and that 0:15:51.320 --> 0:15:54.480 day was like when this whole pandemic started to happen, 0:15:54.600 --> 0:15:56.360 and I was not prepared for that at all. But 0:15:56.880 --> 0:15:59.240 you know, I overdose twice in the same day before 0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:02.720 I went to rehab. And I have a good planet everything, 0:16:02.760 --> 0:16:05.560 but with being really sober um, the one thing I'm 0:16:05.560 --> 0:16:09.880 really struggling with is without like that personal connection with 0:16:10.120 --> 0:16:13.360 in person conversations, meeting people, stuff like that. So I 0:16:13.400 --> 0:16:15.600 just want to ask, like, what advice would you give to, 0:16:15.800 --> 0:16:18.800 you know, fill that void that I feel like I'm lacking. Yeah, 0:16:20.840 --> 0:16:23.280 I feel you. You know, there's something to be said, 0:16:23.320 --> 0:16:25.920 whether you're in the rooms or you know, in I 0:16:26.000 --> 0:16:29.160 know in my office, I'm missing that person to person connection. 0:16:29.320 --> 0:16:31.480 My advice for you is to just live through the 0:16:31.520 --> 0:16:34.440 serenity prayer right now. You could not control the fact 0:16:34.520 --> 0:16:38.040 that the pandemic was going to hit just at the 0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:40.640 time that you were getting out of rehab. But there 0:16:40.640 --> 0:16:43.200 are so many things that you have control over. You 0:16:43.240 --> 0:16:45.920 are missing connection, as I think so many people are 0:16:46.000 --> 0:16:49.200 right now. So you know, in whatever way you can 0:16:49.400 --> 0:16:52.600 get that right now, get it, whether that's a Zoom meeting, 0:16:52.960 --> 0:16:56.640 video conferencing. I'm using like an encrypted video conferencing service 0:16:56.720 --> 0:16:59.400 for for my patients to do one on therapy, face 0:16:59.480 --> 0:17:01.840 timing friends, you know, setting up time to like have 0:17:01.960 --> 0:17:04.760 dinner with them over FaceTime, whatever it is that you 0:17:04.800 --> 0:17:08.800 can do for right now until that time passes. I 0:17:08.840 --> 0:17:11.439 don't know if you have a sponsor, Andrew, but I 0:17:11.440 --> 0:17:13.720 would encourage you to try to get a sponsor and 0:17:13.840 --> 0:17:17.800 this time if you possibly can. Um and really, the 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:22.520 the online meetings through Zoom are absolutely great. Have you 0:17:22.560 --> 0:17:25.400 tried that yet? Yeah, I've been going to that. I've 0:17:25.440 --> 0:17:28.160 been sharing, but for some reason, I can't get into 0:17:28.160 --> 0:17:30.480 the online meetings. You know, I'm not gonna say I 0:17:30.480 --> 0:17:32.639 love them. It's just tough for me. I feel you. 0:17:32.720 --> 0:17:36.159 I understand that it's difficult and challenging for you, but 0:17:36.320 --> 0:17:40.040 just know that this two shall pass. It will it 0:17:40.080 --> 0:17:43.000 will pass. And this is just what you need to 0:17:43.040 --> 0:17:47.240 do to maintain yourself until you're able to get back 0:17:47.359 --> 0:17:50.359 into the meetings. And you know, it's something that you 0:17:50.480 --> 0:17:53.360 just don't have any control over, so you just have 0:17:53.440 --> 0:17:57.520 to try to stay connected however you can, and your 0:17:57.560 --> 0:18:01.040 phone and your computer right now is gonna be your 0:18:01.040 --> 0:18:03.399 best friend. Just so that you know, Andrew, to just 0:18:03.440 --> 0:18:07.000 give you a little context, my mother gave me here. 0:18:07.080 --> 0:18:11.199 She's she's twenty nine years clean, my heroin addiction. Heroin 0:18:11.359 --> 0:18:14.880 was my drug of Joyce sues. I definitely feel you, yeah, 0:18:15.240 --> 0:18:17.840 and you can also look at this is that it's 0:18:18.160 --> 0:18:21.200 maybe a good time for you too, because now you're 0:18:21.840 --> 0:18:26.160 confined to the house and so you can't even get 0:18:26.200 --> 0:18:29.840 out there to like sneak out and go No, that's 0:18:29.920 --> 0:18:32.119 exactly like you know, I've been walking five six miles 0:18:32.119 --> 0:18:33.840 a day. I have a routine things that I do 0:18:33.920 --> 0:18:37.159 and meditate a lot of stuff. That's the hardest part was, 0:18:37.200 --> 0:18:39.880 like you know, dealing with your own emotions, especially nearly clean. 0:18:40.440 --> 0:18:42.879 It's funny, the one thing I'm missing the most is 0:18:43.280 --> 0:18:45.320 seeing people in person. As far as what you said 0:18:45.400 --> 0:18:47.800 getting a sponsor, You're right, and I just did in 0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:51.040 the past. But I'm ready and you're doing it, Andrew. 0:18:51.640 --> 0:18:54.920 You're doing it, you know what I mean, You're actually 0:18:54.960 --> 0:18:57.560 doing it. So just focus on the things that you're 0:18:57.600 --> 0:18:59.920 doing right now. And once again, this too shall pay 0:19:00.000 --> 0:19:05.520 as you're on the right path, you know. You keep trying. Yeah, temporary, 0:19:05.600 --> 0:19:07.560 and you're right, we have no control over it, right, 0:19:07.680 --> 0:19:13.040 and tell yourself your own story, remember what you came from, 0:19:13.080 --> 0:19:14.960 and know that you don't want to go back there. 0:19:15.960 --> 0:19:18.080 My mom saved my life. She walked in. I wasn't 0:19:18.080 --> 0:19:20.720 even breathing. I told her you gave birth to me, 0:19:20.760 --> 0:19:22.200 and then you read birth to me when you say 0:19:22.240 --> 0:19:24.240 my life, because I've been clean since then, and I 0:19:24.280 --> 0:19:26.480 have a totally difficult look and I thank her for that. 0:19:26.600 --> 0:19:29.720 You know. Every day, you know what, Andrew, we are 0:19:29.960 --> 0:19:33.760 sending you love and strength and we're gonna be praying 0:19:33.800 --> 0:19:37.280 for you on this side, absolutely, but we're really happy 0:19:37.400 --> 0:19:40.240 for you to be where you are right now. Of course, 0:19:40.640 --> 0:19:43.800 day by day, I really yeah, one day at the time, Andrew, 0:19:43.840 --> 0:19:46.920 one day at the time. Thank you, Andrew. It's powerful, 0:19:47.040 --> 0:19:51.520 it is. I'm really concerned about the newcomers, especially those 0:19:51.600 --> 0:19:54.840 ones that I mean when I'm online, I'm hearing people 0:19:54.920 --> 0:20:00.479 that have twenty seven days, nine days, twenty four hours. Yeah, 0:20:00.520 --> 0:20:03.600 so if you're newly sober right now, it's really tricky. 0:20:03.640 --> 0:20:05.680 But you can go back to the basics. You can 0:20:05.800 --> 0:20:07.960 do what a lot of addicts will do in the 0:20:08.000 --> 0:20:11.000 beginning of their sobriety, which is ninety meetings and ninety days. 0:20:11.080 --> 0:20:12.679 It can't be in person, you know, you may have 0:20:12.720 --> 0:20:15.720 to do those ninety meetings in zoom. You can find 0:20:15.920 --> 0:20:20.000 a sponsor. You can find a new individual therapist online 0:20:20.000 --> 0:20:23.000 and do weekly or even daily sessions if you need 0:20:23.080 --> 0:20:24.960 you right now. And one thing I want to say 0:20:25.000 --> 0:20:27.000 to for for a lot of people, it was the 0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:30.040 meeting after the meeting. You know, you go to the meeting, 0:20:30.040 --> 0:20:33.240 but then it was all the socializing and the connections 0:20:33.359 --> 0:20:38.199 and the camaraderie that you developed and relationships that you 0:20:38.320 --> 0:20:41.919 developed with people after the meeting. And there's still a 0:20:41.960 --> 0:20:43.880 way to do that. Your phone is going to be 0:20:43.920 --> 0:20:47.320 your best friend around this time, and you just really 0:20:47.400 --> 0:20:51.560 have got to go the full length to stay connected 0:20:51.600 --> 0:20:54.480 with people. And so I wouldn't get to really lean 0:20:54.560 --> 0:20:57.600 on your sponsor, yeah, big time. And if don't feel 0:20:57.640 --> 0:20:59.520 like if you don't have one. You can't get one 0:20:59.520 --> 0:21:02.320 because was on a meeting last night when there was 0:21:02.359 --> 0:21:06.720 a young lady that was looking for a sponsor, and 0:21:06.840 --> 0:21:09.240 the person that was running the meeting was like, Hey, 0:21:09.280 --> 0:21:11.880 anybody who can help this young lady, please put your 0:21:11.880 --> 0:21:15.160 information in the chat so that she can reach out. People, 0:21:15.200 --> 0:21:18.160 put your phone numbers in. I mean, it's still run 0:21:18.359 --> 0:21:23.200 like a traditional meeting. All right, Next question, Aloha Jada. 0:21:23.760 --> 0:21:26.240 My name is Ruchelle and I'm from Eva Beach, Hawaii. 0:21:26.960 --> 0:21:29.080 I was on track to lose weight, but then the 0:21:29.080 --> 0:21:32.080 pandemic hit and now I can't go to the gym. 0:21:32.200 --> 0:21:34.639 How can I stay on track and fight off my 0:21:34.720 --> 0:21:37.520 cravings to want to sit at home? This is a 0:21:37.560 --> 0:21:41.760 hard one. I'm seeing a lot of people having a 0:21:41.800 --> 0:21:45.719 lot of struggle around absolutely food. Yeah. I have a 0:21:45.720 --> 0:21:49.200 girlfriend that is going through the exact same thing. Yeah, 0:21:49.200 --> 0:21:52.320 because you're sitting home and you're just there's a bunch 0:21:52.359 --> 0:21:55.080 of junk and your board and you're eating out of boredom. 0:21:55.320 --> 0:21:58.560 Help us, Dr Mike Ye. And it's sort of crazy 0:21:58.680 --> 0:22:01.320 that health professional and and all the things you see 0:22:01.480 --> 0:22:04.320 send the news always say to avoid processed food. And 0:22:04.359 --> 0:22:07.200 now you know all of the recommendations are, hey, stock 0:22:07.280 --> 0:22:10.359 up on all that food, and of course those processed 0:22:10.359 --> 0:22:12.679 foods are the ones that are highly addictive, and of 0:22:12.680 --> 0:22:15.439 course food is the most socially acceptable drug of choice. 0:22:15.520 --> 0:22:19.720 And you know, neuropally speaking, sugar releases dopamine in the 0:22:19.760 --> 0:22:22.320 brain just like cocaine does, so you know, you can 0:22:22.400 --> 0:22:26.840 see how all of these processed foods, especially UH can 0:22:26.880 --> 0:22:28.840 be so addictive in the brain. You know, I think 0:22:28.880 --> 0:22:33.359 a couple of strategies work. First, having a plan. You know, 0:22:33.680 --> 0:22:36.800 we see in research that just the act of taking 0:22:36.800 --> 0:22:39.080 your food out of the container, putting it on a 0:22:39.119 --> 0:22:43.040 real plate, and sitting at a table works wonders at 0:22:43.080 --> 0:22:46.280 helping people to actually eat less because you know what 0:22:46.359 --> 0:22:50.760 happens we eat mindlessly. Research looking at other countries versus Americans, 0:22:50.920 --> 0:22:55.800 Americans don't listen to their internal cues for satiety. We 0:22:55.920 --> 0:22:58.760 tend to watch the TV as we're eating, so we 0:22:58.760 --> 0:23:01.480 don't even realize that we're full. But when we actually 0:23:01.520 --> 0:23:03.960 sit down at a table, we're forced to turn to 0:23:04.000 --> 0:23:07.320 those internal cues. And by the way, now is not 0:23:07.440 --> 0:23:09.359 the time you need to like rush through your meal 0:23:09.440 --> 0:23:11.680 and get drive through. You know, you have the time 0:23:11.720 --> 0:23:15.080 to like prepare the meal, you could actually sit down 0:23:15.480 --> 0:23:18.200