Speaker 1: Tay. Guys, Honestly, we have like stuff to do for
Speaker 1: the rest of the week, and Drew, guys, even health
Speaker 1: for a few days. And I think I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: do this episode alone. It's actually kind of easy because
Speaker 1: I don't have like a nasty, disgusting, like futrid stench
Speaker 1: of a person just kind of in my space invading
Speaker 1: my like mindset and my thoughts, and I feel like
Speaker 1: we could just get on a deeper level. We could
Speaker 1: talk about periods and tampons and like ovaries and stuff.
Speaker 1: And Drew Drew.
Speaker 2: Drewie, Okay, I did as I was.
Speaker 1: When I heard it, I was like, there's no lay
Speaker 1: he fak fell. It sounded so real it hurts.
Speaker 3: So fucking bad.
Speaker 4: Dude.
Speaker 1: No, well, I'm thinking of just starting this episode alone
Speaker 1: because like Drew has just been missing for a few days,
Speaker 1: and honestly, I'm about my business. I'm about my work.
Speaker 1: I don't just disappear and like go on vacation. He's
Speaker 1: probably on Grinder Island or something. I heard that's the
Speaker 1: thing now, So hi, guys, I'll just be here doing
Speaker 1: the episode alone, honestly, Drew, Yeah, yeah, I'm here. I mean,
Speaker 1: what the fuck is on your head.
Speaker 3: I can see it's a ticket about Wegg.
Speaker 1: What did you get?
Speaker 3: Wait?
Speaker 5: What is this?
Speaker 1: What is this? We were in it? Though we were
Speaker 1: in it? Where are we doing it again?
Speaker 3: We can't?
Speaker 1: You're doing this well? I'm waiting on Drew to start.
Speaker 1: Actually I was gonna wait on Drew, but I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna wait on him. And I have something really important
Speaker 1: to say. I had a dream last night that I
Speaker 1: my sister cut my hair off and I had a
Speaker 1: fuck ass bob and bangs and it literally was like
Speaker 1: Dora And you know how I wear those like tiny
Speaker 1: shorts and shirts right now for the summer. I was
Speaker 1: literally wearing like Dora's colors, Like I had a pink shirt. True, true,
Speaker 1: I mean, what the fuck are you wearing?
Speaker 3: It's a jumpsuit?
Speaker 1: Did you?
Speaker 3: Like?
Speaker 1: Is that your new? Like? Is this a prison?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Can we get this going? Because I, like, I have
Speaker 3: ship to do after this, like I have I have
Speaker 3: to leave, I have to go, So can we like
Speaker 3: hurry the fuck up? Like what are you gonna ask me?
Speaker 3: So many fucking questions? Like damn Jesus fucking Christ, it's
Speaker 3: a fucking tinker Bell wig Because I know you're about
Speaker 3: to ask next, it's a tinker Bell wig. Okay, I
Speaker 3: know I look good, and I know I look good. Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's a lot. That is bold that I didn't pay
Speaker 3: for this ship. I fucking stole it.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, did you get costeely? Is that were No?
Speaker 1: Is that why you're dressed like this?
Speaker 3: Actually? I don't give a fuck anymore since it's the
Speaker 3: most viral fucking clip of all time. Apparently, fuck ABC
Speaker 3: News DFW. Count your fucking days because now because of you,
Speaker 3: I'm on the fucking run. I am the fugitive of
Speaker 3: the fucking law roll the clip.
Speaker 5: Police in Oklahoma City are looking for this man. They
Speaker 5: say that he stole thousands of dollars of wigs from
Speaker 5: Disney on ice performers. If police released the surveillance video
Speaker 5: from Saturday. They say the theft happened at the Oklahoma
Speaker 5: State Fairgrounds. Officials are considering a cash reward in this case.
Speaker 1: Are we gonna keep every time we try to do that?
Speaker 1: It's so scary?
Speaker 3: Ruh? Okay and scene and scene or should we keep going?
Speaker 3: Should we just keep riding?
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's just do a whole episode where it's just
Speaker 1: like it will switch seats and like tap and top out.
Speaker 3: Time they fucked up giving me these uh things though,
Speaker 3: because it's like the perfect fidget. I was thinking like
Speaker 3: of making a fidget like this.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that'll like.
Speaker 3: Also, I'm fucking around. My arm hurts so bad. I
Speaker 3: genuinely think I have a bone contusion, Like genuinely it
Speaker 3: is swollen. Every time I like pinch with these fingers,
Speaker 3: it hurts so bad.
Speaker 1: The period cramp simulator on there, it'll heal it.
Speaker 4: Oh literally, Oh where is that? I'm just wondering, like
Speaker 4: where that is?
Speaker 3: Want that ship? Okay, So that clip of the I
Speaker 3: robbing the fucking Disney on ice? Uh, whatever the fuck
Speaker 3: Disney on ice? Let's talk about that. I look problematic
Speaker 3: because like, why would Disney characters be doing meth in
Speaker 3: front of a bunch of kids? Like, actually, I've been
Speaker 3: thinking about that like that.
Speaker 1: No, No, it's like ice skating, Like they're skating around
Speaker 1: in costumes.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Ice skating is like another term for doing meth?
Speaker 1: Is that actually what people say?
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're like I'm going ice skating, Like, does anybody
Speaker 3: want to go ice skating? It's on grind.
Speaker 1: I can't imagine anybody, Like meth is such a gnarly
Speaker 1: drug to me that I can't imagine anybody's being like
Speaker 1: casual about it, being like, yeah, I'm gonna go ice skating,
Speaker 1: like it's chill.
Speaker 3: Number one drug you can't be casual on. But this
Speaker 3: is like my biggest fear coming true. I've said it
Speaker 3: several times on this podcast over the last three years,
Speaker 3: and my biggest one of my biggest fears is getting
Speaker 3: tried and going to a going to jail for a
Speaker 3: crime I didn't commit, and fuck all of y'all, literally
Speaker 3: fuck all of y'all.
Speaker 1: The comments it's so funny because it's like, no, this
Speaker 1: is an actual crime and they're trying to find the
Speaker 1: person who did it. In the top four comments all
Speaker 1: have like ten thousand.
Speaker 3: Twenty thousand likes, like Drew Phillips. That's Drew Phillips, Like
Speaker 3: they get him, Get him, mama.
Speaker 1: Like whoever whoever is like running the social for like
Speaker 1: Daily Mail or whoever posted it probably was like, oh,
Speaker 1: that was like.
Speaker 3: We got a new story. No, it was ABC News DFW,
Speaker 3: which is also very concerning because I am from the
Speaker 3: DFW area. I have an alibi. I have an alibi
Speaker 3: about not being in okac because it happened in Oklahoma.
Speaker 3: But all I imagine is like the people like going
Speaker 3: through the comments, like looking for tips in like literally
Speaker 3: five hundred comments with ten twenty thousand, thirty thousand likes,
Speaker 3: all saying it was me. So then they deep dive
Speaker 3: on my social media.
Speaker 1: I'm just showing this was like when we were looking
Speaker 1: at it. The first video that showed up is.
Speaker 6: This one, this time seeing the castle since COVID in
Speaker 6: a cry.
Speaker 3: Like a Disney thing. And then if you look up
Speaker 3: Drew Philip, Drew Phillips, I think wig, I think comes
Speaker 3: up and it's me with that fucking hair, with the
Speaker 3: like half blonde, half whatever, dancing like a fucking psychopath
Speaker 3: tweaker and like yeah, like you know, they saw that
Speaker 3: shit and they were like, oh, he's actually fucking crazy,
Speaker 3: like he actually does this shit for real.
Speaker 1: D That was my favorite thing to imagine is somebody
Speaker 1: looking into it and being like, Okay, this guy does
Speaker 1: like this. Oh my god, okay, I'm like deep diving.
Speaker 1: And you don't have any real pictures any like normal videos,
Speaker 1: like there's rarely any content of you just being a
Speaker 1: normal person. They probably were like yeah, this is this
Speaker 1: is the guy I wish you got contacted.
Speaker 3: I know, I was like I was hyper refreshing my email,
Speaker 3: just like waiting for like the email to come through
Speaker 3: like for questioning or some shit.
Speaker 1: But I would just love you on a news broadcast,
Speaker 1: like so they're saying your honor.
Speaker 3: No literally no, I would go like full Andy Kaufman
Speaker 3: and like act like I did it, Like I would
Speaker 3: become a problem and I would waste everybody's time in resources.
Speaker 4: It really doesn't have any normal photos because like I've
Speaker 4: had family members be like, oh, who do you do
Speaker 4: the podcast with? And I'll like show them your guys'
Speaker 4: Instagram and and he has like a bunch of like
Speaker 4: great photos and then I go to yours and it's
Speaker 4: like you with like no jaw basically or like no.
Speaker 3: I always thinking about that the other day and the
Speaker 3: new picture I'm uploading soon. You know, I decided it's
Speaker 3: going up. It's going up, y'all.
Speaker 1: You've made the decision.
Speaker 3: It's going up, and I think it might go up
Speaker 3: either to day.
Speaker 1: You put up the Walter White picture.
Speaker 3: No, bitch, I love that one.
Speaker 1: No one didn't get enough love, like I know, yah,
Speaker 1: Usually like screenshot and post that stuff, but like, why
Speaker 1: did nobody like that picture?
Speaker 3: Because it's fucking rancid and repulsive.
Speaker 1: Bitch, Like, did you like face app a beard and
Speaker 1: a smile.
Speaker 3: Yeah? I faced at the whole thing like it's it
Speaker 3: was a Walter White filter, and then I faced app
Speaker 3: to smile on and then I like contorted my body
Speaker 3: and like held the camera outa.
Speaker 1: Can we play Rya later and you like.
Speaker 3: Have that, bitch, we will get no, Like y'all know
Speaker 3: what rayas Riya's like this if you don't know, is
Speaker 3: just like dating app for like celebrities and like famous people.
Speaker 3: But it's Hella ran through now, Like it's fucking bullshit
Speaker 3: and it's like so annoying. But we play a game
Speaker 3: called Raya where we go and we like make our
Speaker 3: profile as heinous and disgusting as possible, and then we
Speaker 3: just start fucking trolling all the celebrities on there and
Speaker 3: it's fun.
Speaker 1: It's a good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's fun. Like just people looking for love and
Speaker 3: then they see Walter White like dementor or whatever.
Speaker 4: It did work though, because you met Timothy on there,
Speaker 4: right yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but they like ment.
Speaker 3: I am drew the okay, but wait, wait, wait, I
Speaker 3: am Drew Phillips. Timothy is Timothy. We are two separate entities.
Speaker 3: I'm not Timothy's bay. Timothy's not my bay. We are
Speaker 3: just together and that's that. Like, but we can exist.
Speaker 3: We can exist with.
Speaker 1: The word bay. So seriously, I'm not his banbe.
Speaker 3: We can exist not my bait, like without ye.
Speaker 1: And I see you as your own person. But it's
Speaker 1: just way more interesting when you're associated like that.
Speaker 3: This fucking hurts, bro. I think I actually broke my bone.
Speaker 1: Didn't I wish I saw how hard you fell.
Speaker 3: Which I felt hard as fucking I.
Speaker 1: Mean, I heard it it literally. At first, I was like,
Speaker 1: did he knock something over? That's what I thought, And
Speaker 1: I was like, but it was your big, big body
Speaker 1: hitting the floor.
Speaker 3: I really think I'm big.
Speaker 1: Really wait, I have to get this off my chest
Speaker 1: about my dream though, because seriously, I was saying.
Speaker 3: Yeah, fuck Dora, it's uh, what's her nuts, Tinkerbell? You
Speaker 3: want to talk about Dora, bitch, let's talk about Disney Cat.
Speaker 1: Wait. The thing is, I don't understand why he would
Speaker 1: steal those wigs because I don't think they're like good wins.
Speaker 3: It's that RuPaul drag race like uh, drag queen crime syndicate,
Speaker 3: Like literally just like a drag queen stealing a bunch
Speaker 3: of wigs from Disney. Also literally like how are these worth?
Speaker 3: They said ten thousand dollars? There's no bitch. Y'all are lying,
Speaker 3: Like y'all are fucking lying like crazy, these are not
Speaker 3: ten thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Yeah you're wing This one looks crazy.
Speaker 3: Well, no, this one's ten thousand.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, you took the dude. It looks insane. I like,
Speaker 1: I'm kind of amazed by it, Like it's kind of beautiful.
Speaker 1: It like has a life of its own.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it fits me really well too. It's too small
Speaker 3: for my fucking head. I think it's made for like
Speaker 3: toddlers or some shit.
Speaker 1: Like did you get the cheapest one?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I was twenty two bugs, but this all came
Speaker 3: together for fourteen. And there's a little.
Speaker 1: Thing that Okay, this isn't like real, this is pure plastic.
Speaker 3: Also there was like the it says convict on the
Speaker 3: back and it's like sticky, like it's not dried like
Speaker 3: it like I was peeling off, like it fell onto
Speaker 3: a piece of paper and it like ripped the piece
Speaker 3: of paper to shreds, so like there's like pieces of
Speaker 3: like paper.
Speaker 1: Also, I instaccarted some groceries this morning and Drew had
Speaker 1: to answer the door to my.
Speaker 3: I answered the door in this outfit. And also he
Speaker 3: was trying to hand me the girl. He had all
Speaker 3: three bags on his arm and he was like here,
Speaker 3: and I was like, what am I supposed to do?
Speaker 3: And so I started sliding No, I literally started sliding
Speaker 3: my arm under his and then I was like, wait,
Speaker 3: this is weirdest fuck. So I pulled my arm out
Speaker 3: and I was like here, wait, wait on was I go?
Speaker 3: And I like put my shit down and then I
Speaker 3: like went back and just grabbed them one by one.
Speaker 3: But like he was like, what the fuck is going
Speaker 3: on in this house? He was a sweet guy though,
Speaker 3: sweet guy. But also they gave you muscles for free.
Speaker 1: I know, they gave me clams, m tune box. They
Speaker 1: gave me some clams for my chowder, yeah, for my
Speaker 1: east infection my left hand.
Speaker 3: Yeah. But I was saying, I don't know if I'm
Speaker 3: allergic to muscles, oysters or clams, but if they're muscles,
Speaker 3: I was like, should I intentionally eat muscles on the
Speaker 3: podcast today? To have an allergic reaction like.
Speaker 1: That wouldn't be enjoyable for anybody, like not the viewers
Speaker 1: or us, Like you would just like start.
Speaker 3: From it would go so viral. It would be like
Speaker 3: stupid fucking podcast influence er eats muscles to intentionally have
Speaker 3: an allergic reaction on camera for views. All publicity's good publicity, babe.
Speaker 3: All publicity is good publicity.
Speaker 1: Well, in my dream, when my sister cut my hair,
Speaker 1: I literally couldn't stop crying. Everybody would just like, oh,
Speaker 1: you cut your hair, and I was like yeah, and
Speaker 1: then I started sobbing, and it was like in the dream.
Speaker 1: Also in the dream, I was like giving way too
Speaker 1: much props to myself because in my dream my hair
Speaker 1: was like up to here naturally and it got cut.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, should cut off like
Speaker 1: twenty two inches of my hair? And I accidentally was
Speaker 1: dressed like Dora and everybody was making fun of me.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, Halloween came early.
Speaker 3: Do you remember when you cut your pixie wig, I
Speaker 3: mean your your pixie cut and you cried dude?
Speaker 1: Yeah? And I was projecting really hard because I was
Speaker 1: like ugly people, bitch, I looked really ugly yeah, it
Speaker 1: was that Paul was coming from inside the house.
Speaker 3: Fucked it cooked.
Speaker 1: I looked really gros.
Speaker 3: No, you grew into it and it was cute when
Speaker 3: it was like the like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, when it got a little longer. But when I
Speaker 1: first cut all my hair off, that was it was.
Speaker 1: That was a lot like I can't believe I fucking did.
Speaker 3: That, which is kind like it was fine.
Speaker 1: I would do it again if I was like thirty five.
Speaker 1: But also, I think your hair stops growing as fast
Speaker 1: the older you get, so maybe the train his saledom
Speaker 1: pass and I'll never do that because I'm so attached
Speaker 1: to my hair.
Speaker 3: I realized you'll never cut your hair again. Yeah, you'll never.
Speaker 3: And I don't think you'll ever diet of color.
Speaker 1: Yeah no.
Speaker 3: That was such an insane art.
Speaker 1: It's like not worth it. Also, I look back and
Speaker 1: I'm like, bro, give it up. Like bitches watched Scott
Speaker 1: Pilgrim Versus the World one time and.
Speaker 3: They're like, wait, wait, okay, so apparently no, no, no, okay, okay, wow,
Speaker 3: I know apparently I just found this out last night.
Speaker 3: Harry Styles was a part of this band called One
Speaker 3: Direction before he was paid joke.
Speaker 1: Before we started the podcast. You was like, I have
Speaker 1: a banger of a one direction joke for this episode.
Speaker 1: That was so apparently we have been manipulated because Harry
Speaker 1: Styles was originally in one direction. I I can't believe
Speaker 1: there are definitely kids who don't know that. So, like,
Speaker 1: because when you showed me that comment, so basically on
Speaker 1: a video of Harry, somebody was like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I just realized he was in one direction apparently. And
Speaker 1: at first I was like, that has to be a troll,
Speaker 1: like you're just saying that to say it, But then
Speaker 1: I remember that one direction started in like twenty twelve,
Speaker 1: and a lot of the kids on the internet are
Speaker 1: like born in two thousand times.
Speaker 3: It's like us finding out. Well, I don't even know
Speaker 3: if that's a good example. Was justin Timberlake an n Sync? Yeah,
Speaker 3: it's like that, like the same.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I guess we did know him as like a
Speaker 1: solo person and then it was like in Sync. But
Speaker 1: my mom was an in Sync fan, so I knew
Speaker 1: about in Sync when I was younger, and.
Speaker 3: I don't give a fuck about any of that. I
Speaker 3: didn't give a fuck about them, especially especially the game one.
Speaker 1: Oh, they do have one really good song that.
Speaker 3: I like, who the fuck is Drew Starkey? Where did
Speaker 3: he come from? That's another siop? What is it? What
Speaker 3: has he done before?
Speaker 1: Is that? I don't know who that is?
Speaker 3: He's in Luca Guadalajara, I got a new movie. What
Speaker 3: is his name? Luca? Call me about your name?
Speaker 4: I actually don't know how to pronounce it, to be honest.
Speaker 3: Dango dango, fandango.
Speaker 1: I really need to find this fucking song. I'm never
Speaker 1: gonna find it.
Speaker 3: I might need stitches.
Speaker 1: You you're so dramatic. Oh damn, what is this? Oh
Speaker 1: my god, there's a troll song from in Sync. They
Speaker 1: got the band back together.
Speaker 3: We need to get the band back together to watch and.
Speaker 1: It's literally called Troll's Band Together.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we haven't had like a night in in a
Speaker 3: long time.
Speaker 1: No, we haven't had like a proper sleepover with all
Speaker 1: our friends. So we do this thing like once a
Speaker 1: year every time the Trolls movies come out, our friend
Speaker 1: group gets together and does a sleepover and watches the
Speaker 1: Trolls movie together. And every time we have literally watched
Speaker 1: it and then like.
Speaker 3: This is a feat This is a great movie. This
Speaker 3: is no way around remark perfect, perfect.
Speaker 1: How I feel still about Spider Man Across the Spider Verse.
Speaker 1: Just in case anybody was wondering where I stand with
Speaker 1: that movie. I still really want to watch it again.
Speaker 1: I think I might watch it when we go to
Speaker 1: Arizona this week. That's kind of my tradition. It's when
Speaker 1: I'm on a plane I watch it because it just
Speaker 1: makes me happy.
Speaker 3: I'm happy.
Speaker 1: Do you all remember that nineteen?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 1: I but have you seen that fucking first of all?
Speaker 1: That nineteen was the og Drop Shipper, Like they were
Speaker 1: making anything stuff they ate. It is so insane because
Speaker 1: I remember being excited up until the age of like
Speaker 1: even fourteen fifteen, which really goes to show like how wow,
Speaker 1: like childish you are at fourteen fifteen. Even at fourteen fifteen,
Speaker 1: I remember looking at their channel and being like, fuck,
Speaker 1: I want something so fucking bad. And I remember when
Speaker 1: I first got paid from a YouTube thing. I bought
Speaker 1: the like slime they sold, and I bought that irons Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I bought it, and I was so happy. Bitch.
Speaker 1: Those videos are literally just glorified commercials.
Speaker 3: Oh.
Speaker 1: They never made any video that was like actually funny
Speaker 1: or interesting. It was literally just commercial.
Speaker 3: Do you remember the liquid glass bathtub. No, they like
Speaker 3: got like five hundred pounds of liquid glass crazy er
Speaker 3: ends putty and like put it in a bathtub and
Speaker 3: then got inside of it. And then when he was
Speaker 3: getting out, his uh, bathing stuits started falling off. And
Speaker 3: that was my sexual awakening. And ironically, I was like, wait,
Speaker 3: you're like.
Speaker 1: Wait, why would it be really funny if that like fell.
Speaker 3: Yeah, why I should it like come on the way off?
Speaker 3: You would?
Speaker 1: Did you take a time code? Because I just moved
Speaker 1: my legs and I think my whole fucking the jaga, like.
Speaker 3: But uh, I have such a funny story. So when
Speaker 3: I like fucked up my knee, my friends like didn't
Speaker 3: understand like how normal surgery was on like children, Like
Speaker 3: they thought I was like literally dying.
Speaker 1: Yes, and there when my sister got her tonsils, remember
Speaker 1: when she was a kid, I thought she was gonna die.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I literally was like I'm losing my sister exact, I'm
Speaker 1: only seven, exactly, gonna be really hard.
Speaker 3: And like one of my friends Hunter, he like literally
Speaker 3: thought I was dying. Like he freaked the fuck out,
Speaker 3: And we would like sit and watch vat nineteen videos
Speaker 3: all day long, like all like literally that was like
Speaker 3: our shit. We would do axe wars and like build
Speaker 3: like forts out of beds and just spray each other
Speaker 3: with axe all night and then wake up the next
Speaker 3: day and watch Fat nineteen videos. And so he thought
Speaker 3: I was dying. So he I had never gotten anything
Speaker 3: for that nineteen. He'd really never got shipped from it
Speaker 3: because our parents were like, no, that's just fucking like
Speaker 3: random shit. Yeah, it's garbage. So he literally, I'm not kidding,
Speaker 3: spent like five hundred to one thousand dollars on like
Speaker 3: all of the shit we wanted and gave it to
Speaker 3: me in a gift basket and like literally like before
Speaker 3: my surgery, because he actually thought I was gonna die.
Speaker 3: It's it was literally one of the sweetest things ever.
Speaker 3: And we got the uh giant gummy worm and the
Speaker 3: giant gummy bear, and like we took like three bites
Speaker 3: of it, and it was like the most repulsive, nasty,
Speaker 3: fucking thing I ever eat in my life. So we
Speaker 3: proceeded to get my mom's like nice ass like Fiesta
Speaker 3: wear ceramic bowl and like put it inside of it
Speaker 3: and then microwave it for like twenty minutes. Destroyed the bowl.
Speaker 3: I don't think she still knows that we did this,
Speaker 3: but like destroyed the bowl, like melted the coating and
Speaker 3: those are like nice ass fucking dishes and like just
Speaker 3: made like fucking brown black dumb. Yeah, and it was horrible.
Speaker 3: It was like it was so bad and we threw
Speaker 3: it away.
Speaker 1: Okay, we need to like go back. We need to
Speaker 1: really like reframe our minds, because fourteen fifteen year olds
Speaker 1: now want chrome hearts. We wanted the big gummy bar,
Speaker 1: big gummy worm from Bat nineteen, like that well of wealth.
Speaker 1: We were like, holy fuck, if I could afford the
Speaker 1: fifty dollars gummy worm, I would be set. I would
Speaker 1: be so fucking happy.
Speaker 3: They want chrome hearts. They want chrome hearts and ring lights.
Speaker 1: Christmass they want chrome hearts, ring lights, essential hoodies. I'm
Speaker 1: just naming off what my siblings want. Are fucking crazy.
Speaker 1: Like I always see tiktoks of people being like, oh,
Speaker 1: hell no, this is what my brother just asked for Christmas,
Speaker 1: and it's a crazy list, and I see all the
Speaker 1: comments like there's no way this is real, bitch, that
Speaker 1: shit is real. My sister literally will call me and
Speaker 1: be like, yeah, I want these extensions. They cost six
Speaker 1: hundred dollars. Also, I was thinking, like I really want
Speaker 1: these work own shoes, like I need them in paint,
Speaker 1: Like they're not sold anymore, but like they're for resale
Speaker 1: for like two thousand dollars. And I just have to
Speaker 1: ignore all her texts because I'm like, I don't know
Speaker 1: who the fuck you think you are talking right now?
Speaker 1: Like you are actually bad shit.
Speaker 3: They always ask you for like one thousand three pairs
Speaker 3: of one thousand dollars Jordans a year, yeah, like at
Speaker 3: every single.
Speaker 1: Year's list, and they don't watch this podcast. And I
Speaker 1: will have y'all hold me accountable. I will not be
Speaker 1: getting my siblings shit for Christmas this year. They are
Speaker 1: being cut off, Like I feel like I have to
Speaker 1: like cut off, Like I feel like this is my
Speaker 1: equivalent to succession, is like I have to cut off
Speaker 1: my children. I've never seen succession though, so I don't
Speaker 1: know the fun.
Speaker 3: It's pretty close. It's pretty close.
Speaker 1: Yeah, running I'm running a fucking empire, y'all exactly.
Speaker 3: Uh So, yeah, we fucking got them. We finally we
Speaker 3: got them. Really really important moment in history happened this
Speaker 3: last week. The VMA's happened, and we solidified the new
Speaker 3: pop girls, like we really we really did Chappelle aslas
Speaker 3: Chaplain grown Um and Sabrina Carpenter fucking tore. And also
Speaker 3: I didn't really see any Katie Katy Perry slander, but
Speaker 3: like we had some slander like thrown in real life
Speaker 3: and I was like, no, like absolutely fucking not. Like
Speaker 3: her new shit is bunk as fuck, like we all
Speaker 3: know that, but like what she did to pop, yeah,
Speaker 3: was revolutionary. She is a revolution nobody was.
Speaker 1: It was like the Dark Horses era. I think that really.
Speaker 3: It was the Christine Sidelco music video that like like
Speaker 3: not because.
Speaker 1: The Christine sidela but it's because of like just that
Speaker 1: era of like.
Speaker 3: It was just camped too far.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was when musicians and like internet culture was
Speaker 1: for the first time merging. When that was happening, everybody
Speaker 1: was really confused and didn't know really how to integrate
Speaker 1: it correctly. Now it's like the normal thing of you'll
Speaker 1: just see like an influencer or like internet person in
Speaker 1: a video and they won't do a thing of like
Speaker 1: do your viral moment. Like it's not like that. It's
Speaker 1: just like they're in it. We all know, like I
Speaker 1: see you, you see me whatever. But it was like
Speaker 1: that era where it was.
Speaker 4: Like, oh, wait, didn't they didn't she bring out backpack
Speaker 4: Kid on SNL?
Speaker 3: Yes, dude, Oh my god.
Speaker 1: But I'll give it to her. It was a confusing
Speaker 1: time for everybody, and she.
Speaker 3: Was a pioneer in her own way in that. Yeah,
Speaker 3: because she gave us all a lot of opportunity. Because
Speaker 3: I'll never forget the sex sape me and Katie Perry
Speaker 3: shot because she saw me online the sex tape? Is
Speaker 3: that not out yet?
Speaker 1: I don't think that's really and I don't think she
Speaker 1: would appreciate that.
Speaker 3: We'll blare it and bleep it. We'll blair and bleep,
Speaker 3: We'll blair and bleep.
Speaker 1: No, that VMAs. I need you all to know. I
Speaker 1: grew up in stand culture, and at this point in
Speaker 1: my life, I don't necessarily engage in it the way
Speaker 1: I used to like. But something about this VMAs I needed.
Speaker 3: To watch so they were mad.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was like messy like it just felt. Really
Speaker 1: what it was is I was rich reaching for the
Speaker 1: happiness I felt as a teenager because I haven't felt
Speaker 1: that kind of joy in a long time. But that's
Speaker 1: a different don't fucking touch me.
Speaker 3: Oh my fucking god, I lost my turn of ba.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, what you did?
Speaker 4: You haven't felt joy in a long time?
Speaker 1: I think that's a topic, crazy assumption for you to
Speaker 1: make about you that problematic, Like women can feel joy too.
Speaker 1: Yeah I was, and I was like, I don't remember
Speaker 1: saying that.
Speaker 4: Okay, well we could rewind it, and you just said
Speaker 4: rewind it?
Speaker 1: What are you gonna take the tape out?
Speaker 2: Old?
Speaker 1: For fucking.
Speaker 4: No, this is all shot up digitally.
Speaker 1: I'm shocked, you know what that is. But I really
Speaker 1: really wanted to watch the VMAs MTV. I have a
Speaker 1: fucking bone to pick with you, you dumb fucking pitch it.
Speaker 1: Why the fuck was it streaming in real time East
Speaker 1: coast and then not on the West coast?
Speaker 3: So I they're canceled for that?
Speaker 1: It makes no sense, bitch. We live in the digital era.
Speaker 1: Why is your fucking TikTok account MTV posting about everything
Speaker 1: happening at the fucking awards? Oh but I have to
Speaker 1: wait till eight pm.
Speaker 3: Say, I've never seen Enya apply herself to anything more
Speaker 3: in my entire life than her trying to get the
Speaker 3: live stream of the MTV Music Awards up on our
Speaker 3: goddamn TV. She was like trying to pirate. I thought
Speaker 3: she was trying, Like she was like she bought a VPN,
Speaker 3: I bought a v bought TV. She spent like literally
Speaker 3: fifty Did you cancel the VPN? Oh yeah, okay, good good?
Speaker 1: Oh I canceled everything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you still got to charge that thirty bucks
Speaker 3: from Hulu. Yeah, it was and it didn't work. None
Speaker 3: of it worked.
Speaker 1: It was like it was dollars attempt.
Speaker 3: It was an hour and a half I'm not exaggerating,
Speaker 3: and you're trying to get it to be live on
Speaker 3: the TV, but we just ended up like watching the
Speaker 3: clips uploaded afterwards were.
Speaker 1: Uploaded before it even streamed on the West Coast. So MTV,
Speaker 1: get your fucking shit together. But you make no fucking sense.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but we love you.
Speaker 1: And by the time it was streaming on the West Coast,
Speaker 1: all the celebrities were posting their fucking looks on ID
Speaker 1: So what the fuck would I watch your stream for? Bitch?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it like it angered me in a
Speaker 1: way I haven't been in a long time. But thank
Speaker 1: you for what you've given to me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, thank you you. I think I think y'all did.
Speaker 3: Y'all did y'all's number with that one. Y'all did the
Speaker 3: big one.
Speaker 1: Like I think, I feel been trying to get the
Speaker 1: VMA's back in our face for a long time, and
Speaker 1: this was the first year where I was like, wait,
Speaker 1: why do I need to watch?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Sabrina Carpenter Contiana Grande, she tore like down. I
Speaker 3: literally literally killed chapelone Chills. It felt like like all
Speaker 3: the nods to like Madonna, Gaga, all of it was amazing.
Speaker 3: John Buck Also, the slander on Addison Ray's outfit is
Speaker 3: not tolerated. Yeah, it is not tolerated in this house.
Speaker 3: Like if you get it, you get it. Just say
Speaker 3: you don't get it, and that's okay, but you don't
Speaker 3: got to like talk shit. But like there's levels to
Speaker 3: this ship.
Speaker 1: Also, I do think people it was supposed to be
Speaker 1: that people underestimate, not even that people underestumeate how fucking
Speaker 1: hard it is to put a look together. Like y'all
Speaker 1: are thinking, Oh, I'm gonna go out with my friends
Speaker 1: to the fucking pizzeria in my local town. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: throw my fit. No, you're not thinking about being on
Speaker 1: a global stage and what that means, and having to
Speaker 1: like stand out but not stand out too much and
Speaker 1: like all those things. So don't compete where you don't compare,
Speaker 1: leave my girl alone.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but we are just Avid Addison Rayer and there
Speaker 3: stands and protectors, so don't talk.
Speaker 1: And it was a good look.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it literally was. It literally was. What else happened? Oh, bitch,
Speaker 3: Psychological operations to the highest degree went down at the
Speaker 3: fucking VMA's And I'm sorry, like I'm really gonna get.
Speaker 1: Into a person like I haven't even seen like the
Speaker 1: scary part of tiktoks.
Speaker 3: Yeah no, because I'm gonna be the fucking first one
Speaker 3: to break the story. Goddamn it, bitch. Okay, last year,
Speaker 3: the last three years, it's been so demonic, like everything
Speaker 3: has been demon coded. It's like old got a raad
Speaker 3: like like just demonic, Like was that like platework Cardier, Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: like just like all black leather, scary, fucking dark sided energy,
Speaker 3: like worshiping the demon, like tworking on the demon's lap
Speaker 3: and shit, which like when it first happened, I was like,
Speaker 3: huh yeah, this is cool, Like, uh, break the glass ceiling,
Speaker 3: whatever the fuck. I don't give a cluck anymore. But
Speaker 3: this VMA's we watched the pendulum swing for everyone, everyone
Speaker 3: in real fucking time. It was spooky, ooky, scary vibes.
Speaker 3: Everyone had crosses, they were wearing veils. It was very
Speaker 3: Catholic core like everyone was so pure, like it was
Speaker 3: very light energy. And I don't know what that says.
Speaker 3: It's not a psychological operation. I think it's literally just
Speaker 3: like people are like I want home and positivity. I'm
Speaker 3: tired of the demons, like I'm tired of all the
Speaker 3: demon shit. But yeah, it was like the like everyone
Speaker 3: started dyeing their hair fucking blonde when their new album
Speaker 3: rolled out because they were so dark sighted like dark
Speaker 3: trad or whatever, triad like like Brenette vibe, like scary,
Speaker 3: dark energy, and then they went to like blonde, bitch,
Speaker 3: I get both, what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: You sound fucking crazy, like you'd be like I'm gonna
Speaker 1: break the case. I'm gonna break the case.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I did just go back and look. There was not
Speaker 3: one dark sided, sick and twisted evil outfit other than
Speaker 3: a couple like people didn't try hard enough. That was scary.
Speaker 3: I saw a couple of outfits where I was like bitch,
Speaker 3: what the fuck are you wearing like that fucking like
Speaker 3: pleather like er uh, patent leather, like shiny with like
Speaker 3: the white piping like that. Shit freaks me the fuck out,
Speaker 3: like the James Charles outfits, Like what is.
Speaker 1: It like the like kind of like muglair looking.
Speaker 3: No, it's just like shiny like you don't like patent leather.
Speaker 3: I don't like I liked it. I don't like it anymore.
Speaker 3: It's like it's like that goddamn off White belt, like
Speaker 3: the same thing happened to it. I like the off
Speaker 3: White belt, but like y'all just did too much with it,
Speaker 3: like ugh, like give it up.
Speaker 1: Well, I have nothing negative to say. I'm just moving
Speaker 1: into a very positive headspe.
Speaker 3: You have been very positive.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm so happy. I'm happy. I'm happy. I'm happy.
Speaker 1: I'm happy. Oh actually, no, I got a fucking bone
Speaker 1: to pick.
Speaker 3: I was on TikTok Live you after shit talking MTV
Speaker 3: for like ten minutes.
Speaker 1: I was on TikTok Live and somebody asked me how
Speaker 1: my year went, and I just like went on a
Speaker 1: stupid fake whoa. You were like bleeding a lot.
Speaker 3: It's like staining the chair every time I touch it, it hurts.
Speaker 1: Oh, you're gonna get like asbestos from Do you see.
Speaker 3: It's like leaking like plasma? Or is that bone marrow
Speaker 3: at the top. Do you see the clear liquid coming out?
Speaker 3: It might just be white blood cells. It's already healing.
Speaker 3: My body is a fast healer, look right there. Oh yeah, yes,
Speaker 3: I'm already scabbing over babe. I'm like Wolverine. I do
Speaker 3: give wolverine.
Speaker 1: Any What was I saying? Oh, I was on live
Speaker 1: stream and somebody asked me how my year went, and
Speaker 1: I said that I went awful, and I'm like, I
Speaker 1: tried this year. This year was the first year in
Speaker 1: my life where I was like, I'm gonna be optimistic.
Speaker 1: I was in a deep, deep, dark depression, but I
Speaker 1: was like, you know what, I already know when I
Speaker 1: hear the birds chirping, I'll be fine, Like this year
Speaker 1: will be awesome. No, this year was a fucking nightmarish
Speaker 1: hell escape for me. And I'm no longer having trying
Speaker 1: to have a positive mindset because look what it got me.
Speaker 1: Why was one of the comments like somebody posted that
Speaker 1: clip on TikTok. Why was one of the comments like
Speaker 1: easy for her? To say, I already know her life's
Speaker 1: been super easy.
Speaker 3: That's in the rally like Kamala calling out Trump's rally sizes.
Speaker 3: That's in you trigger. If you talk about her having
Speaker 3: an easy growing up, had.
Speaker 1: It easy growing up, you don't know the fucking half, motherfucker.
Speaker 1: My life was awesome in a funny fun way.
Speaker 3: It literally wasn't awesome.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was something, but like a lot of y'all
Speaker 1: are mad, I made it out the mud, like I
Speaker 1: don't give a fuck, like fuck you bitch, like what
Speaker 1: like literally and the.
Speaker 3: Dead as did make it out of the trenches, and
Speaker 3: now we're back in the trenches because our house is
Speaker 3: fucking falling.
Speaker 1: I have to go back to mentioning that I'm from
Speaker 1: Miami and I grew up poor, remember when that was
Speaker 1: like my thing? I mentioned every episode the way people
Speaker 1: are starting to forget the NEPO rumors have gotten a
Speaker 1: little too far. People think my shit is easy. Shit
Speaker 1: is not sweet. I still have a lot of things
Speaker 1: to figure out and like to work on. I was
Speaker 1: obsessed with the Fortnite uh.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, the fnc es this weekend.
Speaker 1: Drew put me on and I watch Peter Bought and
Speaker 1: five hours worth of y'all need to leave Poyo alone.
Speaker 1: Motherfuckoyo is literally carrying like he is lit as.
Speaker 3: Fun most underrated player of all time. No, he's giving
Speaker 3: like he he's giving like the mind of the mastermind. Yeah,
Speaker 3: like he's controlling the moves, like he's taking a ba seat,
Speaker 3: back seat, so Peter can like bask in the limelight
Speaker 3: and get the cool kills. But really like he's holding
Speaker 3: it fucking down like he is. There's no team.
Speaker 1: There's no Peter Rotten team.
Speaker 3: Mmm, yeah, you need to work on that.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 1: I watched like five hours of that stream and then
Speaker 1: like the thing about watching that, I haven't been playing
Speaker 1: Fortnite as much, but the thing about watching that it
Speaker 1: made Fortnite look so fun and exciting, and I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I want to play. But then I
Speaker 1: was like, wait, I'm not gonna get on and play
Speaker 1: like a fucking world champion right now. I'm gonna get on,
Speaker 1: get murked and be like really sad and upset and
Speaker 1: just like turn off my fucking PS five the second
Speaker 1: I get killed. So I'm not gonna play. But that
Speaker 1: almost got me to play, Like it almost got me there.
Speaker 1: I miss I missed disassociating and playing Fortnite for five
Speaker 1: hours a day, Like I was much happier because I
Speaker 1: wasn't in my real life. I was just like disconnecting
Speaker 1: and like exist like world out Fortnite in World Out,
Speaker 1: Like I missed it so much. They just need to
Speaker 1: add something funny like proximity chat or something. Then I
Speaker 1: would play. Then I would play all the fucking time.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I watched five hours of Fortnite this weekend.
Speaker 1: That's kind of where my mind's at, just like very gluttonous.
Speaker 3: I did find out that this new tick dropped that
Speaker 3: makes you allergic to meat, and no, it just came out,
Speaker 3: like why can't they drop cool new animals that like
Speaker 3: make you forever youthful? Like why do they make you
Speaker 3: allergic to meat?
Speaker 1: I thought you were part of scientology. Don't they have
Speaker 1: that yet?
Speaker 3: But yeah, but I can't talk about it.
Speaker 1: Well, I just did.
Speaker 3: Have you ever looked at a hippo? Like have you ever?
Speaker 3: Actually they're the most alien creatures on this fucking planet.
Speaker 3: There's this like pygmy hippo like going viral right now
Speaker 3: that I'm on viral. She's eating She's like this little
Speaker 3: like tiny hippo. It's so fucking cute and it's slippery
Speaker 3: and she like bites her like handlers and shit. Just
Speaker 3: look up, uh oh, look up in the pigmy hippo.
Speaker 3: I think it's like, how do you spell, It's like
Speaker 3: mung dang or something like that, or mungoo I love,
Speaker 3: I love mood dang moodang.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's really cute.
Speaker 3: Skip this, fuck Daily Mail.
Speaker 1: Wait what the viral makeup line?
Speaker 3: Don't give Daily Mail a fucking view.
Speaker 1: Wait hippos look like are these like different kinds of
Speaker 1: hippos because the big ones look really.
Speaker 3: Gross, That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Bro.
Speaker 3: I watched a video of them and I was like, wait,
Speaker 3: I don't think I've ever actually looked at a hippo before,
Speaker 3: Like they're cute, but hell no when they open that
Speaker 3: goddamn mouth and eat the terrifying.
Speaker 1: I only know what a hippo looks like in extreme
Speaker 1: detail because in ace Ventura Pet Adventures, when Jim Carrey
Speaker 1: comes out of a hippo's assa.
Speaker 3: So that's why I know what a hipp Wasn't he
Speaker 3: like inside of a rhino that got fucked or my,
Speaker 3: it's a.
Speaker 1: Rhino I'm thinking of a rhino, not a hippo.
Speaker 3: I think it was maybe making that up, but there's no, no, no, no,
Speaker 3: there's like this different like fucking Scandinavian show with a
Speaker 3: clip of like someone hiding inside of like a rhino
Speaker 3: or an elephant, like an animatronic elephant, and then like
Speaker 3: they it's really gnarly, like I super graphic, but like
Speaker 3: the elephant comes up and starts like fucking the animatronic elephant,
Speaker 3: and there's like footage inside. It's all fake though, but
Speaker 3: you can see like the giant elephant penis period. Okay,
Speaker 3: what Rick and Morty did for vape shops, what Ricken Morty,
Speaker 3: what Rick and Morty did for vape shops is what
Speaker 3: I imagine the Beatles did for music. Like when people
Speaker 3: say when people say the Beatles changed everything, like Rick
Speaker 3: and Morty changed everything for these goddamn vape shops.
Speaker 1: I don't understand the lead galley of it though, Like
Speaker 1: I guess it's not, but it's just so much that
Speaker 1: like what is what are they gonna do like have.
Speaker 3: A free promo at that point?
Speaker 1: Yeah, true, but like why do they even do drugs?
Speaker 1: Like that? In Rick and Morty like, why did it
Speaker 1: become so stoner affiliated? Is it just because it was
Speaker 1: like a stoner show to walk?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just like the thoughts that are had are
Speaker 3: like very stoner coded, Like what if we like had
Speaker 3: like a portal and like planet? Yeah exactly when that's what.
Speaker 1: Rick and Morty is.
Speaker 6: To me.
Speaker 1: It's like, oh, like I got shot into butt planet
Speaker 1: with boob.
Speaker 3: That's literally Miss Frazzle like, wait, actually let's have that conversation. Uh,
Speaker 3: magic school bus being the original Rickenrizzle being the original
Speaker 3: fricking MORTI girl, it doesn't fucking matter you You knew
Speaker 3: exactly what I was referencing and talking, you know, exactly exactly. Yeah.
Speaker 3: The pandemic of Rick and Morty, I feel, is coming
Speaker 3: to an end, thankfully.
Speaker 1: But I'm gonna be replacement for that though.
Speaker 3: Smiling friends, I don't think.
Speaker 4: So.
Speaker 3: Maybe give give them two more seasons and it'll be like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because it took work and Morty a minute to
Speaker 1: infiltrate the vape shop, so they just need a little time.
Speaker 3: It took them three years. I feel like if it
Speaker 3: was six years before I saw him on backpacks in school.
Speaker 1: I feel like if we were back in time, and
Speaker 1: this show was still a thing. It would have been
Speaker 1: big in the vape shops and it's happy Tree friends.
Speaker 1: That would have been crazy for the vape shop community.
Speaker 1: Do you know what that is?
Speaker 4: Yeah? But I feel like that it's so it's like
Speaker 4: so gnarly to have like a beheaded teddy bear. Yeah
Speaker 4: on a vape.
Speaker 3: That's more of like a Zoomi's or a hot topic thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're were they in zoomis and hot topic? I
Speaker 1: think so. I think there was merch of that everywhere.
Speaker 4: Was there a merge because that ship was pretty gnarly.
Speaker 4: I remember watching it.
Speaker 3: It was literally the worst thing we could have ever
Speaker 3: done to our brains.
Speaker 4: We remember watching when I was like thirteen thirty. I
Speaker 4: wasn't thirty. I was thirteen, and there was merch. Scared
Speaker 4: the fuck out him.
Speaker 3: It was horrible.
Speaker 4: I remember there was like my life before, like like
Speaker 4: one of my like uh brother or one of my
Speaker 4: friend's older brother showed me that, and then there's my
Speaker 4: life at.
Speaker 3: It's always the older fucking brothers. Like I have a
Speaker 3: visceral memory of like the face of like I think
Speaker 3: it's the squirrel character peeling off and it's like all
Speaker 3: the muscles and the eye and connective tissue and shit.
Speaker 1: Dude, my dad was dating this woman with like teenage
Speaker 1: kids and cousins, and they would show it to me
Speaker 1: all the time. And I was like nine years old,
Speaker 1: and I had to act like I liked it because
Speaker 1: I wanted to be cool. And they would show it
Speaker 1: to me on like a computer, that's fine, and I
Speaker 1: would just like really try not to watch, and they'd
Speaker 1: be like, why are you being a pussy? Just watch
Speaker 1: it now. They had seriously were like something else. That's
Speaker 1: the same family who showed me the Bloody Mary Universal
Speaker 1: Horror Nights, a commercial that scared the fuck out of me,
Speaker 1: and I thought I was gonna die. And I like,
Speaker 1: I had a big mirror in my room and I
Speaker 1: couldn't sleep that night, and I went to go tell
Speaker 1: my dad and he was like, who the fuck is
Speaker 1: Bloody Mary? Go to bed? And I was like, and
Speaker 1: I wanted to take the mirror off the wall, but
Speaker 1: I was like too tiny to do it. But yeah,
Speaker 1: they did have big.
Speaker 3: Things coming, y'all. By the way, big things are coming,
Speaker 3: like the big Earth, Like something is coming. I don't
Speaker 3: say that it's actually big, it's actually happening though, like
Speaker 3: something big is going to happen soon.
Speaker 1: The thing is, I wait, I don't remember if I
Speaker 1: said this on the last episode. I don't remember when
Speaker 1: this happened. Did the earthquake happen before or after the last.
Speaker 3: Episode, I don't know. I think we talked about it.
Speaker 4: Whatever.
Speaker 1: I hate you guys. Well, Josia got a colon, I
Speaker 1: was going to say, and people actually showed up.
Speaker 3: I was just about to bring that up. The colonsay,
Speaker 3: Josiah's colonoscopy meetup was a wild fucking success. It was
Speaker 3: amazing meeting all of y'all out there. Anytime I see
Speaker 3: like photos or video of it, it's actually the It
Speaker 3: makes me cry laughing thinking about that actually happening and
Speaker 3: people actually being down for the vibe and jokes. People
Speaker 3: skip like fucking college, like yeah, they're called out of
Speaker 3: work like this.
Speaker 1: Also, just like the idea of like y'all sitting in
Speaker 1: the little courtyard that was across from the hospital he
Speaker 1: was getting get done at and me and Drew walking
Speaker 1: in like it felt like we were actually going to
Speaker 1: visit a friend who was in the ICU or something serious,
Speaker 1: and they were like fans outside, like wishing a fast recovery,
Speaker 1: and we were inside just cracking U because we're like,
Speaker 1: I cannot believe this motherfucker actually posted the address and
Speaker 1: people actually showed up to a surgery that is not
Speaker 1: really a surgery. He's just getting his fucking butt looked.
Speaker 3: At, like that shit got probed down.
Speaker 1: I still like didn't really understand what a colonoscopy was
Speaker 1: before that, because I was thought a colonoscopy was when
Speaker 1: they like put the tube up your button, shoot water
Speaker 1: through it and empty out.
Speaker 3: Your cold colonic.
Speaker 1: Colonic colonic sounds like an alcohol.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would love to drink a colon, Like I'll
Speaker 3: have a.
Speaker 1: Colonic on the rocks, please, thank you.
Speaker 3: You can get a coffee in a I want a colonic,
Speaker 3: no egg white. Make sure you use decaf coffee for
Speaker 3: your coffee.
Speaker 1: Anemas is that a thing?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a thing. Coffee animas are a thing.
Speaker 1: Wait wait, what what is an enema? Is that just
Speaker 1: like a douche.
Speaker 3: It is essentially a colonic, but with coffee.
Speaker 1: I don't understand why is that like medically safe or.
Speaker 3: I don't think it's medically recommended, but like people do it?
Speaker 1: Is it to get like boof it.
Speaker 3: I don't even know if they do it with caffeine.
Speaker 3: I think it's really just to clean out their fucking colon.
Speaker 1: You can do that at home.
Speaker 3: Yeah, people they like sell systems for it. When I
Speaker 3: was really, really down bad in high school and like
Speaker 3: looking for any fucking solution to like get the shit,
Speaker 3: that's like lodging my fucking colon out of my ass.
Speaker 3: I was doing so much research on like enemas and
Speaker 3: suppositories and laxatives.
Speaker 1: Your body has been a failure from the beginning, exactly.
Speaker 3: Fuck you, Sorry, No, I'm kidding. Magnesium citrate, y'all. That's
Speaker 3: that's the one A bottle of a bottle or two
Speaker 3: of magnesium citrate will have you right.
Speaker 1: The only time I've ever drank fucking magnesium citrate is
Speaker 1: when I was in Miami and I was so fucking constipated.
Speaker 1: So I called Drew and I was like, what do
Speaker 1: you drink? He was like, magnesium citrate. I went to Walmart.
Speaker 1: I got it. This wasn't like the right before the
Speaker 1: New Year's of twenty twenty one or twenty twenty two. Bitch,
Speaker 1: I fucking drank that shit. I went to bed. I
Speaker 1: was sharing an Airbnb with my friends in Miami. I
Speaker 1: went to bed. I woke up two hours later, and
Speaker 1: it felt like I was like hungover, Like you know
Speaker 1: when you wake up in the middle of the night after
Speaker 1: drinking a lot and you just feel like dehydrated and
Speaker 1: shitty and like nauseous. I woke up like that. I
Speaker 1: went into the.
Speaker 3: I don't get hungover, yeah, because.
Speaker 1: You black out and you like barely wake up.
Speaker 3: Yeah. And I'm a good fucking vibe I have a time.
Speaker 1: But I woke up in the middle of night, fully
Speaker 1: dehydrated and thought I was dying. Wet in the bathroom,
Speaker 1: blew fucking water out my butt and then had to
Speaker 1: shower because I was so nauseous and dehydrated and I
Speaker 1: felt so sick. I had a gnarly headache. Woke up
Speaker 1: the next day and I tested for positive for COVID.
Speaker 1: Yeah and yeah, So I'm like convinced magnesium sit trade
Speaker 1: gave me COVID.
Speaker 3: I thought it gave her COVID. I was like, girl,
Speaker 3: the gestation night before you already.
Speaker 1: Had really right before I took it, I had taken
Speaker 1: a test for COVID and I tested negative. So within
Speaker 1: the hours of taking that I think it like jump
Speaker 1: drive crashing my immune system, and I had COVID and
Speaker 1: it destroyed my New Year's that year, and it was
Speaker 1: really sad for me, and I spent New Years alone,
Speaker 1: not even with my family.
Speaker 2: Or my friends.
Speaker 3: Aw.
Speaker 1: Um, well, my back hurts so bad.
Speaker 3: After Josiah's colonoscopy, we went to the mall, and the
Speaker 3: mall I think really like for twenty twenty five of them,
Speaker 3: mall is going to be in in a very big way.
Speaker 3: Like it was so.
Speaker 1: Much fus fun as fuck, y'all, Like you can see
Speaker 1: stuff in real life, you don't have to look at
Speaker 1: it on your iPhone.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was such a fucking vibe, like like you
Speaker 3: didn't have to like worry about certain things not fitting.
Speaker 3: You got to see the pieces in person, you got
Speaker 3: to interact with people. It was just really good energy
Speaker 3: and it was really good vibes. And I'm really excited
Speaker 3: to go back during the Christmas time to see all
Speaker 3: the people like rushing to get gifts and like see
Speaker 3: all the Christmas decorations. It's going to be like a wholesome, cozy,
Speaker 3: cold vibe. Malls are in, y'all. Like I'm trend predicting
Speaker 3: malls because they like kind of fell the fuck off.
Speaker 1: I know we need to get back to like kids
Speaker 1: going to malls and hanging out like that should be
Speaker 1: like the peak experience. But I feel like there are
Speaker 1: still kids who.
Speaker 3: Like, yeah, they're still had guessing.
Speaker 1: There still has to be mall rats. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: Like being a teenager and going to the mall with
Speaker 1: your family was so embarrassing because you had such a
Speaker 1: high chance of seeing their kids who were there with
Speaker 1: your family piss me off.
Speaker 3: Also, I need to thank my mother publicly for driving
Speaker 3: and my friend's moms for driving me and my friends
Speaker 3: like an hour and thirty minutes to the closest mall
Speaker 3: to drop us off to just sit in the fucking
Speaker 3: parking lot and then pick us back up and drive
Speaker 3: us back home after like four hours of roaming around.
Speaker 3: That is dedication to a craft. That is we need
Speaker 3: more people like that in this world. Also, if everybody
Speaker 3: had my brain chemistry, Yes, if everyone had my brain
Speaker 3: chemistry and thought the way that I thought, this world
Speaker 3: would be very a very special place that is actually
Speaker 3: a lot, we would eradicate the population.
Speaker 1: Everybody would self combust Like you're crazy, you just went
Speaker 1: on a tangent about how you think, like the demons
Speaker 1: are leaving and there's like a big spiritual like thing
Speaker 1: happening in the public eye, because.
Speaker 3: There is there fully is, Like I genuinely believe that.
Speaker 3: Just go back and y'all you'll notice how fucking creepy
Speaker 3: and weird it is.
Speaker 1: Did He would not shut the fuck up the whole
Speaker 1: time we were watching the VMA, So I was like,
Speaker 1: can you shy it up? He was like, look, there's more,
Speaker 1: there's more, there's more, there's more crosses. Look, even in
Speaker 1: that performance she had crosses on her, Like, what is this, bitch?
Speaker 1: It's chrome hearts.
Speaker 3: Yeah she was wearing it's basically chrome hearts. But I'm
Speaker 3: going to get a cross tattoo.
Speaker 1: I think just to have a saying that are you serious?
Speaker 3: Just have a story story, be like are you religious?
Speaker 3: Not really? I just think like the cross is current,
Speaker 3: like it's meaningful, Like the symbol itself is fire, and
Speaker 3: like what it means. But like it's so simple, it's
Speaker 3: like this people behind it. Oh yep, wells, I just
Speaker 3: grew up hella religious, So it was like kind of
Speaker 3: a vibe.
Speaker 1: I didn't grow up religious at all, other than like
Speaker 1: being forced to partake in some Jehovah's witness activities.
Speaker 3: I got confirmed.
Speaker 1: What does that mean?
Speaker 3: Like I made I got baptized when I was like
Speaker 3: an infant, and then at the age of like thirteen
Speaker 3: and fourteen, I made a conscious decision, decision, decision, decision, decision, fuck, decision,
Speaker 3: decision yeah, yeah, decision to join the church as an adult.
Speaker 3: So I went to like every Sunday and Wednesday, Wednesday,
Speaker 3: I would go to like classes at the church.
Speaker 1: Sunday, and was Wednesday like, damn, you want to get
Speaker 1: to Haven really fucking bad?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I locked. I fully, I locked in my spot,
Speaker 3: like I was thinking very order. Yeah no. I was
Speaker 3: literally like, okay, if I do this, like I have
Speaker 3: a solid chance of getting into Heaven, like even if
Speaker 3: I fall out of love with God later in my life.
Speaker 3: And then like the uh. The day before we got confirmed,
Speaker 3: we were having like a class and someone brought up
Speaker 3: gay and like the teacher like went on this like long,
Speaker 3: gnarly winded conversation like anti homosexual like rhetoric. So me
Speaker 3: and Madeline walked out, but we went back and got
Speaker 3: confirmed anyways, but we did not stand for that shit
Speaker 3: in the moment we were like, girl, fuck y'all, like
Speaker 3: you're fucking weird. Oh it's it's peace and love. It's
Speaker 3: peace and love and love. Everybody love everybody. Suck my
Speaker 3: dick and my balllls. Literally.
Speaker 1: I did a good job of not interrupting you, but
Speaker 1: by doing that, I don't remember what I was gonna say.
Speaker 1: And I was really trying to do a good job
Speaker 1: of listening and remembering what I was gonna say. But
Speaker 1: that's just not gonna happen. It's it's gone forever.
Speaker 3: It's all good. Everything is gonna be okay.
Speaker 1: Fuck. I was gonna say something about religion, and I forgot.
Speaker 1: Oh is it too late to get baptized?
Speaker 3: I could it get baptized, right, Yeah, you can do
Speaker 3: that at any point in your life.
Speaker 1: I want to get baptized, just to be like, oh
Speaker 1: that was pre baptism. Yeah, like that was there's pre
Speaker 1: impost baptism in you and that was pre baptism.
Speaker 3: That's kind like yeah, I support, I literally support it.
Speaker 3: I support.
Speaker 1: I would want like a cunty baptism, Like I'd want
Speaker 1: to go like up to Big sur and like go
Speaker 1: get baptized in the river.
Speaker 3: Yeah you can do that like that. They probably have
Speaker 3: like a church group up there that does that.
Speaker 1: No, it makes her. I feel like it would be
Speaker 1: more like culty.
Speaker 3: I got baptized in like this nasty, fucking gross tub
Speaker 3: that was just a statin it water behind the stage constantly.
Speaker 1: I bet people have pissed in there.
Speaker 3: It was like always full of water. So that water
Speaker 3: was full of fucking brain eating amibas and shit. My god,
Speaker 3: imagine getting baptized like in a late because they do
Speaker 3: that shit all the time, and you get him a
Speaker 3: month later, you'd probably be happy.
Speaker 1: Even you'd be like, oh my god, God took over
Speaker 1: my mind.
Speaker 3: And I feel it was my story. It was my story.
Speaker 3: It was imptant to be.
Speaker 1: I just remembered that they taught us how to swim
Speaker 1: growing up in Miami, like they taught us how to
Speaker 1: swim when we were in like pre k.
Speaker 3: Kindergarten ata in some places.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's a law in Florida you have
Speaker 1: to teach the kids how to swim. But also I
Speaker 1: don't know if they did this with my younger siblings,
Speaker 1: but they're also like ten years younger than me, so
Speaker 1: I don't know. But the swimming pool was an above
Speaker 1: ground pool literally in the like pipe room, like it
Speaker 1: was in this scary fucking dungeon room.
Speaker 3: It was underground school.
Speaker 1: No, it wasn't underground. It was like where all the
Speaker 1: water heaters and stuff for the school was. It was
Speaker 1: like really weird. And I just remember this room so vividly,
Speaker 1: and it was like so dark and dingy and kind
Speaker 1: of orange. And I just remember having to go get
Speaker 1: in the pool with all my classmates and like swim
Speaker 1: circles and giving us life ESTs and stuff. But it
Speaker 1: was the weirdest experience ever. And I don't know if
Speaker 1: they do that anymore, Like I want to look at.
Speaker 3: I definitely do that shit sometimes, y'all. I'm in bed,
Speaker 3: I'll just be laying in bed, like I had a
Speaker 3: really good day. I'm like feeling great, and then I
Speaker 3: start descending into madness, like and the thought that always
Speaker 3: comes to my head is what if I'm not in
Speaker 3: my bed right now, Like what if I'm actually in
Speaker 3: the middle of the street.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Drew was saying that to me the other night.
Speaker 1: He was like, do you ever get that feeling? I
Speaker 1: was like no, And then we just got there in silent.
Speaker 3: It's because I'm a shifter show.
Speaker 1: It's because your schizophrenic.
Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I like, yeah, I uh yeah, it's freaky
Speaker 3: freaks me the funk out sometimes, and even thinking about
Speaker 3: it right now, I'm like, wait, am I actually here? Well?
Speaker 1: I keep having scary dreams, so I don't know what
Speaker 1: that's about.
Speaker 3: That's your SSR. I pumping all the demonic energy out
Speaker 3: of your body.
Speaker 1: I'm flooding my brain with demon Yeah, before I go
Speaker 1: to bed demons.
Speaker 3: Do you know what song I'm talking about?
Speaker 1: Oh? Oh, ash Nico, I think so fuck wa alright,
Speaker 1: now I need to find this.
Speaker 3: It's a It's like a Spanish song, Portuguese or something.
Speaker 1: It I thought you were singing this song.
Speaker 3: No, but this song is so fucking funny. I'm crazy,
Speaker 3: but you like that?
Speaker 1: You like that?
Speaker 3: Angela my head set?
Speaker 1: All right? I really don't have anything else to say,
Speaker 1: if I'm being honest.
Speaker 3: So one of the reasons our friend group is so
Speaker 3: tight knit and close and has survived all of the
Speaker 3: many years together is because none of us fuck each other. No, no,
Speaker 3: y'all are incestuous, and y'all all fucking each other in
Speaker 3: your friend groups. That's bad. Actually, it's not bad. You
Speaker 3: can do whatever the fuck you want, but if you
Speaker 3: want a long lasting relationship with your friends, don't go
Speaker 3: around banging all of them slags like damn God, title
Speaker 3: fucking slag, oh slag, Oh fucking Daniel fucking to watch
Speaker 3: Naked Attraction.
Speaker 1: That's what really keeps you together is watching Naked Attraction.
Speaker 1: That's like the best show ever. I love that show.
Speaker 1: It's so fucking funny, which makes me feel fucked up
Speaker 1: because I'm just literally laughing at naked people. Like it's
Speaker 1: just so funny.
Speaker 3: It's really the only place in the world you can
Speaker 3: go to see like the average human body, like really
Speaker 3: see like what a real human looks like, because like
Speaker 3: all the fucking porn is contrived. It's like the hottest
Speaker 3: people like big as.
Speaker 1: Even like I it's like you're seeing the hottest people on.
Speaker 3: The Yeah, but on Naked Attraction, it is what we
Speaker 3: actually look like. And it's just so funny to just
Speaker 3: make make fun of like the way some vaginas look
Speaker 3: and some penises. It's fun. Like y'all should try it out, dude.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I like every time there's a man on the screen,
Speaker 1: it really freaks me out. I hate the close ups
Speaker 1: of the penises when you.
Speaker 3: Can see like the fucking like chicken goose bumps on
Speaker 3: the ball. Also, incision supposed to be you know, that
Speaker 3: was supposed to be a vagina. Yeah, the scene like
Speaker 3: it was supposed to grow into a vagina or the
Speaker 3: other way around. It's sealed up because we're all girls first, right, Yeah,
Speaker 3: Jesus made women with his rib, ripped it out of
Speaker 3: his body.
Speaker 1: Well. My media of the week is, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: I'm on the last season of Girls. I have five
Speaker 1: episodes left. I think I'm gonna finish it today.
Speaker 3: Banger. Oh, I broke this at some point. I don't
Speaker 3: remember doing that, but you were saying that the finales
Speaker 3: have gotten really good.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the like season finales of those episodes become so
Speaker 1: intense and good, and I'm oh my god, it's just
Speaker 1: such a good show. I love that show. It's so funny.
Speaker 3: Dude. I actually and ironically can't pull this off the
Speaker 3: way I was able to, because this fucking hurts when
Speaker 3: I use my pointer finger. Can you just like rip
Speaker 3: that off?
Speaker 1: Oh tank you baby, oh baby, I'm finishing Girls. That's
Speaker 1: my media of the week, and my song Media of
Speaker 1: the week is Freeman in Paris by Joni Mitchell. Work
Speaker 1: to Do the Isisley Brothers. We got to get you
Speaker 1: a woman, Todd run Grin and your malmast think you
Speaker 1: pussy in my butt.
Speaker 3: M minus square Heart. It's a bunch of random fucking
Speaker 3: numbers that I'm not gonna read. Just look up square
Speaker 3: Heart and then Usuria parentheses. Psychosis by Edward Scaler tricks
Speaker 3: very bullish on Edward Skeleer tricks up next for real.
Speaker 3: I think he's pushing the medium in the craft further
Speaker 3: than anybody in the world right.
Speaker 1: Now, that's what people say about me.
Speaker 3: Hot topic. Hey and Hunter Hunter, go watch Hunter Hunter.
Speaker 3: Uh it is perfect. Damn to the lash detail, Damn
Speaker 3: to the lash minute detail.
Speaker 1: I like this mood you're in today.
Speaker 3: Yeah, like mania.
Speaker 1: You're like in a carrying mood. You're gonna carry me
Speaker 1: through this day.
Speaker 3: Yeah. No, I'm gonna get you.
Speaker 1: We're gonna go to the gym and it's gonna destroy
Speaker 1: your life.
Speaker 3: I was gonna say, just wait, I will come the crack.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be.
Speaker 3: I will crash like crazy very quickly, and I will
Speaker 3: experience and hondonia on like anything.
Speaker 1: This is the first time are like we aren't like synced,
Speaker 1: Like we're not absorbing each other's energy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, ye oh yeah, we're drifting apart.
Speaker 2: I don't want to be friends.
Speaker 3: I don't want to be friends with you anymore.
Speaker 1: So we really are Elijah and Hannah. Like the more
Speaker 1: I want. But like this is literally me and Drew's future,
Speaker 1: because all we talk about is I'm like, oh, somebody,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna date things, I'm gonna fucking live with them.
Speaker 1: Hell the fuck now. I don't believe in marriage. I
Speaker 1: don't believe in living with a partner. That shit's fucking crazy.
Speaker 1: Get the fuck away from me. I'm gonna live with
Speaker 1: you forever. And then watching that show, I'm like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, this is.
Speaker 3: You can do it. You really can do it. Okay, okay,
Speaker 3: we're done by