1
00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:06,320
Speaker 1: You all appreciate it.

2
00:00:11,360 --> 00:00:12,400
Speaker 2: When I was younger and.

3
00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:15,880
Speaker 3: My mama had peak seventeen years old, kicked out on

4
00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:18,479
Speaker 3: the streets go back at the time, I never thought

5
00:00:18,520 --> 00:00:21,120
Speaker 3: i'd see your face. Ain't a woman alive that could

6
00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:23,200
Speaker 3: take my mama's place, spending.

7
00:00:22,840 --> 00:00:24,840
Speaker 1: It from school saying to go home.

8
00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:27,440
Speaker 3: I was the fool with the big boys, breaking all

9
00:00:27,480 --> 00:00:30,360
Speaker 3: the fruits, said, jeez with my baby sister.

10
00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:32,640
Speaker 1: Oh goodie, jeez. We was bored up.

11
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:36,800
Speaker 4: Guys, we are back from the old, fiery and choice.

12
00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:43,040
Speaker 1: I'm Erica, I'm Nila Hay and I'm really excited because

13
00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:47,920
Speaker 1: we have a special guest today. Her name is Felicia.

14
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:51,800
Speaker 4: Latour Hi and if you don't have Alicia, follow her

15
00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:53,840
Speaker 4: on Instagram at Felicia Latour.

16
00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:56,880
Speaker 1: She does beautiful makeup, and not only that, she has.

17
00:00:57,080 --> 00:01:02,280
Speaker 4: The cutest fucking child than cutest, and she's always dropping

18
00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:04,040
Speaker 4: gems like I swear I was. I listened to your

19
00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,319
Speaker 4: Instagram all the time and you go on your your

20
00:01:06,319 --> 00:01:10,280
Speaker 4: little Insta story rants and I'm like, yes, even today,

21
00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:12,640
Speaker 4: you're a little ego one. I was like mm hmm, girl,

22
00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:15,520
Speaker 4: because every day I struggle with making my ego take

23
00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:17,920
Speaker 4: a back seat, like it's really hard out here.

24
00:01:18,080 --> 00:01:20,440
Speaker 1: It's like a daily job. Well, especially because we live

25
00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:24,679
Speaker 1: in a world where like the ego driven.

26
00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:28,039
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, like the ego is king. Like it's

27
00:01:28,080 --> 00:01:29,880
Speaker 4: if you don't have ego, than your week ghost.

28
00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:30,959
Speaker 1: It's weird.

29
00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:36,720
Speaker 4: So anyway, I'm really excited to have you for coming.

30
00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:41,360
Speaker 1: Yes, and uh, we were just talking about our weekend.

31
00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:44,240
Speaker 1: Me and Miila had pretty like a rough weekend. And

32
00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:45,800
Speaker 1: I don't know what did you do this weekend? I'll

33
00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:50,520
Speaker 1: even find out. This weekend, I did make up. And

34
00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:54,200
Speaker 1: then I went to a mom's brunch. Oh I saw that.

35
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:57,400
Speaker 1: How was that? It was really good? Yeah, it's really dope.

36
00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:00,920
Speaker 1: And then I caught up with one of my friend friends.

37
00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:03,960
Speaker 1: Oh yeah this see your mom's friends regular ship. Yeah

38
00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:04,640
Speaker 1: it was really cool.

39
00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:07,640
Speaker 5: Just a bunch of black moms that are like powerful, working,

40
00:02:08,919 --> 00:02:10,480
Speaker 5: woke and.

41
00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:12,720
Speaker 1: You didn't know any of them. It's kind of like

42
00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:16,080
Speaker 1: they just invite different different women that they I.

43
00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,000
Speaker 5: Knew a couple of them because I worked with them.

44
00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:22,200
Speaker 1: And then but I like to make new friends, you know,

45
00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:27,240
Speaker 1: so I'm like, hey, girl person, But yeah, it was

46
00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:27,840
Speaker 1: super cool.

47
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:29,760
Speaker 4: That's funny you say you like to meet new friends

48
00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:32,440
Speaker 4: because it's I feel like it's really hard to make

49
00:02:32,480 --> 00:02:34,000
Speaker 4: friends as an adult.

50
00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:37,280
Speaker 1: Like, yeah, I don't know how to really do about that,

51
00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:37,680
Speaker 1: do that?

52
00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:41,679
Speaker 4: Like I feel like you're like my like my newest friend,

53
00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:44,240
Speaker 4: Like I figured about like one that I hang out

54
00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:47,600
Speaker 4: with consistently, you know, because I think I've like had

55
00:02:47,639 --> 00:02:50,040
Speaker 4: attempts because you can see I can be kind of

56
00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:54,799
Speaker 4: aggressive from our meeting. But it just depends on I feel,

57
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:57,079
Speaker 4: because sometimes I'm really aggressive and meeting people and other

58
00:02:57,120 --> 00:03:00,919
Speaker 4: times I'm like really introverted and I don't know how

59
00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:03,240
Speaker 4: to where it even start or talk or hold the

60
00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:04,840
Speaker 4: conversation and get really awkward.

61
00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:06,880
Speaker 1: I think when we first started hanging out, I was like,

62
00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:10,840
Speaker 1: does she like me? Whatever?

63
00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:14,639
Speaker 6: I guess you mean you are hard to read, though,

64
00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:18,480
Speaker 6: But that's because I'm overly friendly, Like I'm just it's

65
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,600
Speaker 6: easy for you to make friends because the women just

66
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:21,840
Speaker 6: come to me all the time. I don't know it's

67
00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:25,080
Speaker 6: my lesbianism or like I'm just friendly, but I think it's.

68
00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:28,760
Speaker 1: My resting face. Yeah, maybe it feels like that too.

69
00:03:30,040 --> 00:03:30,280
Speaker 2: With her.

70
00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:33,200
Speaker 6: With her, Yeah, I think maybe it is just it's

71
00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:35,560
Speaker 6: just hard to read. It's not it's not neither here

72
00:03:35,640 --> 00:03:36,960
Speaker 6: nor there. It's just like you're just like.

73
00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:39,480
Speaker 4: My god, both of you feeling and it doesn't have

74
00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:41,800
Speaker 4: anything like you not being friendly.

75
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,440
Speaker 6: It was just like that, I don't know even a

76
00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:46,520
Speaker 6: long I was like, how are you in Erica? I

77
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,800
Speaker 6: was like, she's like, because I don't know, I'm like,

78
00:03:48,920 --> 00:03:52,440
Speaker 6: this is her face, like she.

79
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:55,000
Speaker 1: She likes you. It's just she's just she's not tripping.

80
00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:57,960
Speaker 1: This makes me sad. Don't be sad.

81
00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:00,920
Speaker 4: It's just I've always known this be true because I've

82
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:03,880
Speaker 4: gotten this all my life, but like when it's affirmed again,

83
00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:05,520
Speaker 4: it makes me feel like, well, what am I doing?

84
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,880
Speaker 1: That's like nothing, girl, Like, what am I doing that's

85
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:08,760
Speaker 1: throwing people off?

86
00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:11,280
Speaker 6: I wish I had a better resting bitch face people

87
00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:12,120
Speaker 6: said about a lot of times.

88
00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:13,280
Speaker 1: Don't even be a bitch.

89
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:17,000
Speaker 6: It's also because you're beautiful. You know, people think beautiful

90
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,800
Speaker 6: women because I'm beautiful.

91
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,560
Speaker 4: No, that's not I don't like that shit either though,

92
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,760
Speaker 4: because my mom used to my mom, like I told

93
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:24,960
Speaker 4: you before, like whenever little girls and I was growing up,

94
00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:26,560
Speaker 4: if I got into a fight with some of my

95
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,480
Speaker 4: mom would always use my beauty as the reason why

96
00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:30,839
Speaker 4: they didn't like And that's not healthy.

97
00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:34,680
Speaker 1: Like because then you start like thinking everyone's jealous of you.

98
00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:36,919
Speaker 1: A lot of times people are though they are, but

99
00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:39,200
Speaker 1: like sometimes they're not. You know, it's true.

100
00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:40,800
Speaker 4: I mean it's like when you have that shitting grain

101
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:42,559
Speaker 4: in your brain, like, Oh, she don't like me because

102
00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:44,839
Speaker 4: I'm pretty, but she don't like you because y'all ain't

103
00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:49,960
Speaker 4: got it same, you know. And so yeah, I'm very

104
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,760
Speaker 4: conscious of that. I'm like hyper conscious of that with Iri.

105
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:56,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's not because you're pretty. What have you done?

106
00:04:57,040 --> 00:05:03,720
Speaker 1: Just no? But uh, okay, well I'm gonna work on that.

107
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:08,080
Speaker 7: Smile just smile more or you know what you can

108
00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:09,960
Speaker 7: do just talking that you appreciate them more.

109
00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:16,119
Speaker 4: Maybe I got you every time I meet them, Like, I.

110
00:05:13,160 --> 00:05:16,320
Speaker 1: Know, I appreciate you. High nice to me, you, I

111
00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:22,800
Speaker 1: appreciate you. I'm so appreciative. I'm so appreciative. Thank you

112
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:25,839
Speaker 1: for being here and being born. I appreciate thank you

113
00:05:25,920 --> 00:05:27,600
Speaker 1: for being born, thank you for being born.

114
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:31,840
Speaker 4: Okay, well myself, I'm gonna think about that more this week,

115
00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:34,479
Speaker 4: figure out how to work more.

116
00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:36,200
Speaker 1: Tired of hearing that ship.

117
00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:45,279
Speaker 4: But anyway, uh, we didn't really have a topic today.

118
00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:47,960
Speaker 1: I think we'd like thought about it on and off

119
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:50,279
Speaker 1: since we asked Felicia. But like then, I don't know

120
00:05:50,279 --> 00:05:53,880
Speaker 1: what happened. It's kind of like the story of my life.

121
00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:56,880
Speaker 6: Then I don't know what happened mine too, miss about

122
00:05:56,880 --> 00:06:04,400
Speaker 6: our friends. But you don't want to talk about your weekend.

123
00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:06,880
Speaker 8: Well, my weekend.

124
00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:11,839
Speaker 4: Friday chilled. Saturday, I went to a baby shower. My

125
00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:15,360
Speaker 4: friend had a baby like a month before her baby shower,

126
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:16,880
Speaker 4: like she the baby was born a month before.

127
00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:19,320
Speaker 1: The baby shower, so she it was like a birthday party.

128
00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:22,040
Speaker 1: It was like a birthday party, which was nice. And

129
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:25,320
Speaker 1: then I went out with some friends.

130
00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:34,600
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, So basically I see a couple sometimes and

131
00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:38,120
Speaker 4: they're married and they allow me to join in on

132
00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:39,400
Speaker 4: their relationship every now.

133
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:46,120
Speaker 1: And they met on Tender. That's important because I'm the

134
00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:47,760
Speaker 1: Queen of Tender. I know how to work that show.

135
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:49,920
Speaker 4: I know you won't find me out in La Tender though,

136
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:52,239
Speaker 4: don't try to swipe. You keep swiping, you'll never find.

137
00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:56,040
Speaker 6: You've motivated me greatly with my tender approach, and it's helped.

138
00:06:56,160 --> 00:06:58,320
Speaker 4: I only used Tinder out of town except for them,

139
00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,320
Speaker 4: but that was early on in my tindering where I

140
00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:02,200
Speaker 4: found them, and then I think like after I found them,

141
00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:03,520
Speaker 4: I like disappeared.

142
00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,719
Speaker 1: So it was great. They're great.

143
00:07:06,839 --> 00:07:11,200
Speaker 4: You know, they're a very happily married couple. You know,

144
00:07:11,240 --> 00:07:12,640
Speaker 4: I wasn't sure at first of when you meet, like

145
00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:14,280
Speaker 4: you meet a couple, you're like, why are they doing this?

146
00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:17,200
Speaker 4: Like are you unhappy? Do you need help within your

147
00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:20,760
Speaker 4: sex life or what? No, it's just the wife really

148
00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,640
Speaker 4: enjoys women. The man likes to see his wife enjoy

149
00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:25,400
Speaker 4: women and also likes women himself.

150
00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:29,560
Speaker 6: So you must also found like the hottest couple on Tender,

151
00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:31,800
Speaker 6: cause I see couples all the time and they're not hot.

152
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,760
Speaker 1: I found the hottest company for sure, hands down. I

153
00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:37,840
Speaker 1: don't know how like young hot, like yeah, cause they're

154
00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:39,640
Speaker 1: always like ol whole thing's change on Tender.

155
00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:41,880
Speaker 4: You know, they are really hot, both of them. When

156
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:43,680
Speaker 4: I found them, I was like, this is this fake?

157
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:44,520
Speaker 4: This isn't real.

158
00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:46,320
Speaker 1: And they said, we thought you were fake, and I

159
00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:50,600
Speaker 1: was like, no, bitch, y'all are fake. Anyway, I've been.

160
00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:53,960
Speaker 4: With them this weekend and then yesterday I went out

161
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,720
Speaker 4: with the baby daddy went to a party for our friend,

162
00:07:56,840 --> 00:08:01,080
Speaker 4: our friend's birthday party, and.

163
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:03,680
Speaker 1: That was I'm exhausted. I'm drained. I'm exhausted Monday. I

164
00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:07,000
Speaker 1: feel like it's Sunday today. It does for Sunday for sure,

165
00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:11,800
Speaker 1: and that was my weekend. Good you. I just drank

166
00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:13,240
Speaker 1: entirely too much.

167
00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:13,600
Speaker 2: Oh.

168
00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:16,800
Speaker 1: I went on a tender date. What you guys? This

169
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:20,680
Speaker 1: tender tender. So some of my friends like.

170
00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:23,640
Speaker 6: You have to like I've had an audit off relationship

171
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:28,520
Speaker 6: with tender because it's not always successful. But my friends

172
00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:31,280
Speaker 6: were having like a very annoying conversation on the couch

173
00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:35,720
Speaker 6: because okay, this is totally off topic. My black guy

174
00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:39,280
Speaker 6: friend was saying he doesn't date burnt black women, and

175
00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:41,600
Speaker 6: I already know he's dumb, so he's I mean, does

176
00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:44,360
Speaker 6: not He's not my friend. That comment stopped. I've know

177
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:45,560
Speaker 6: him since we're like in seventh grade.

178
00:08:45,559 --> 00:08:47,360
Speaker 1: Oh it was remember you like you know him?

179
00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:50,840
Speaker 6: Oh yeah yeah yeah.

180
00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:52,760
Speaker 1: Anyway, I was like, let me get the fuck out

181
00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:56,560
Speaker 1: of here. So I started tindering. I'm like, oh, so

182
00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:57,560
Speaker 1: I found this cute guy.

183
00:08:57,920 --> 00:09:01,360
Speaker 6: And it's so funny because at first he's like I'm like,

184
00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:02,880
Speaker 6: I'm like, just text me because I'm not going to

185
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,040
Speaker 6: be on here all night. So he was like, are

186
00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:06,520
Speaker 6: gonna you want to come meet for a drink. I'm

187
00:09:06,559 --> 00:09:10,480
Speaker 6: in the valley or whatever. And his initial response was

188
00:09:10,559 --> 00:09:11,280
Speaker 6: like yeah, but I.

189
00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:12,720
Speaker 1: Might want more than just a drink.

190
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:14,360
Speaker 6: And I was like, oh my god, do you have

191
00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:15,720
Speaker 6: to do this, like just want to be a slut

192
00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:19,559
Speaker 6: to you see me at least, but he like just

193
00:09:19,679 --> 00:09:20,120
Speaker 6: like chill.

194
00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,160
Speaker 1: He was being aggressive.

195
00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:23,960
Speaker 6: So I was like, he's like, do you st't you

196
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,360
Speaker 6: want to go out? And I was like I did.

197
00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:27,040
Speaker 6: I was Actually he was like I really wanted to

198
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:28,360
Speaker 6: meet you. I was like I wanted to meet you too,

199
00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:32,360
Speaker 6: but word of advice, chill. And then he's like I'm

200
00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:34,200
Speaker 6: Then I could see him like trying to type and

201
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:36,600
Speaker 6: then stop, you know, the dots came up, and then

202
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:39,680
Speaker 6: he was like, I'm sorry forgive me. You put me

203
00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:41,240
Speaker 6: in my place. Now can we hang out now? I

204
00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:42,480
Speaker 6: was like, yeah, you can come. I was like, I'm

205
00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:43,959
Speaker 6: going with my friends to the bar where you could come,

206
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,040
Speaker 6: but you need to behave.

207
00:09:45,679 --> 00:09:47,240
Speaker 1: Anyway, he came. He had a really good time.

208
00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:49,320
Speaker 6: He's actually really cute, which is you know, like he

209
00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:53,640
Speaker 6: looks actually like his pictures. Who's like articulate chocolate, yes,

210
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:54,520
Speaker 6: nice teeth.

211
00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:03,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, And we got drunk and like made out and yeah,

212
00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:12,040
Speaker 1: That was it. And then last night I got which is.

213
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:18,000
Speaker 6: My I know, which which is all bad because I

214
00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:19,760
Speaker 6: was like trying to be a strong black woman, like ah,

215
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,520
Speaker 6: because you don't need to talk to.

216
00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:21,920
Speaker 1: Me like that.

217
00:10:22,640 --> 00:10:32,360
Speaker 6: I'm not like that, right, And then last night I

218
00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:35,600
Speaker 6: got drunk again, and I where, we don't get drunk

219
00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:36,200
Speaker 6: every night.

220
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:37,480
Speaker 1: This is a nice one. We don't like.

221
00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,040
Speaker 6: This is like my off weekend because I don't have

222
00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:41,079
Speaker 6: the baby. And then I don't know what the.

223
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,640
Speaker 1: Fuck I was doing. Last night I posted a nude

224
00:10:42,679 --> 00:10:43,479
Speaker 1: on my Insta.

225
00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:47,199
Speaker 6: Story and I left it there for five hours until

226
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:50,200
Speaker 6: my baby daddy screenshot it in was cussing me out

227
00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:51,160
Speaker 6: all types hoys this.

228
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:52,960
Speaker 1: Morning, like you're a homa.

229
00:10:55,679 --> 00:10:57,160
Speaker 6: And then I was wait, she never even looked at

230
00:10:57,160 --> 00:10:59,040
Speaker 6: who view did it or how many people, or really

231
00:10:59,080 --> 00:10:59,760
Speaker 6: look at my DM.

232
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:02,240
Speaker 1: So I just deleted it and cringe for like five minutes.

233
00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:04,680
Speaker 1: But you know, life goes on. Everybody's seen a.

234
00:11:04,679 --> 00:11:09,960
Speaker 4: Titty before, so you'll Live's think about breastfeeding like that

235
00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:11,720
Speaker 4: little but little titty.

236
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:15,880
Speaker 1: Oh well, life, Mozon. So yeah, that was my weekend.

237
00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:23,959
Speaker 4: Oh my god, Felicia, did she tell us? How do

238
00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:24,440
Speaker 4: we asked you?

239
00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:25,160
Speaker 1: I'm honored.

240
00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:27,760
Speaker 6: Bit you're still joined for the weekend. Okay, so we're

241
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:30,000
Speaker 6: also gonna play for the I haven't have coffee today,

242
00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:32,760
Speaker 6: so that's a problem. That's why I can't like I

243
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:35,640
Speaker 6: should have never worked out in the sun. I'm like

244
00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:39,720
Speaker 6: burn out literally, Yeah, working out already deplete your energy.

245
00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:41,800
Speaker 6: Then you decided to go on an eighty five nine

246
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:43,880
Speaker 6: degree day and to run.

247
00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:46,640
Speaker 1: What's wrong with you? Now you're doing what you're motivating,

248
00:11:46,720 --> 00:11:49,160
Speaker 1: how you're making me feel like? Really, I'm taking notes.

249
00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:52,079
Speaker 1: I'm gonna start taking notes on your instance stories too,

250
00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:59,800
Speaker 1: like ego Asidne bitch has it together, try and girl

251
00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:01,320
Speaker 1: doing good.

252
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:05,080
Speaker 4: Job anyway I want to. I thought we would play

253
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:08,040
Speaker 4: this game for the culture. I don't know Folice their work.

254
00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:09,600
Speaker 4: I haven't really been able to hang out with her

255
00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:11,400
Speaker 4: outside of work. We're gonna work on that. We're gonna

256
00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:11,679
Speaker 4: do that.

257
00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:13,040
Speaker 1: I'm gonna smell more.

258
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:17,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, No, I believe you know you like I like you?

259
00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:22,240
Speaker 5: Right, this was before this moment. I feel like I'm

260
00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:23,920
Speaker 5: already in got it.

261
00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:31,240
Speaker 1: You like me. You're a Scorpio, so that's no wonder. Yeah,

262
00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:33,840
Speaker 1: I think that's just another thing. Scorpios. We're we're hard

263
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:36,760
Speaker 1: to read sometimes, Yeah, I think, like that's why you sure?

264
00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:38,600
Speaker 1: Are you judging me? And You're like, no, I'm just

265
00:12:38,640 --> 00:12:41,120
Speaker 1: reading reading you like I am judging. You're not judging you.

266
00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:42,200
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to feel you out.

267
00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:46,760
Speaker 4: I see you, I see you know its exactly.

268
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,880
Speaker 1: I'm an observer. I don't have to say a lot. Yes,

269
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:52,240
Speaker 1: and this depends what moved I'm in anyway.

270
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:54,960
Speaker 4: But I thought we were I thought we could play

271
00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:56,480
Speaker 4: because we would get to know know each other a

272
00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:58,200
Speaker 4: little better. I know, Jamila has only met you one

273
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:00,439
Speaker 4: other time, which is that IRI's birthday. And I have

274
00:13:00,520 --> 00:13:02,800
Speaker 4: been fucking around with this game and it's kind of addicting.

275
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:03,480
Speaker 1: It's fun.

276
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:07,600
Speaker 4: It actually doesn't provide any information about you, about how

277
00:13:07,679 --> 00:13:08,840
Speaker 4: much you know about ship.

278
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:13,120
Speaker 6: Yeah, so this is like the black version of Heads Up,

279
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:16,360
Speaker 6: which is another app. This is it's kind of like charades. No,

280
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:18,199
Speaker 6: not really, because you could talk, you just can you can?

281
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,800
Speaker 6: You could say everything but the word on the screen.

282
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:23,280
Speaker 5: Wait, I'm laughing because when you said that, you're in

283
00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:25,680
Speaker 5: the DMV, like, don't even look.

284
00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:27,800
Speaker 1: And I love that game. I don't.

285
00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:32,240
Speaker 6: Are they so happy at the goddamn b of the

286
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:34,880
Speaker 6: DMV and the people next to me, just fucking made

287
00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:37,720
Speaker 6: great best friends, like five of them playing fucking heads

288
00:13:37,760 --> 00:13:39,640
Speaker 6: up in the fucking DMB and thousand oaks.

289
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,520
Speaker 1: And I was pissed. I was like hungover.

290
00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:44,160
Speaker 6: I had to pay like a thousand dollars for like

291
00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:47,320
Speaker 6: tickets and ship and they were like, we have the DMB,

292
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:48,840
Speaker 6: you might as well make the best of it. And

293
00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:52,120
Speaker 6: I was like, don't fucking smile over here and look

294
00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:52,360
Speaker 6: at me.

295
00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:56,360
Speaker 1: I know all the answers. Anyway, I was so mean

296
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:57,640
Speaker 1: that day. I was like, I'm a bit.

297
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:01,559
Speaker 4: Anyway, don't and yet here we are.

298
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:03,439
Speaker 6: Well, they were playing for the culture. Depend has that,

299
00:14:03,559 --> 00:14:05,520
Speaker 6: but this is for the culture. So there's actually girl

300
00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:08,280
Speaker 6: talk and there's guide talk. They should we tried guide talk.

301
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:10,800
Speaker 6: We should try guide talk just to see, Okay, do you.

302
00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:16,280
Speaker 1: Want to do? Okay, okay, the first one that comes up. Okay,

303
00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:17,680
Speaker 1: so you go down when we're.

304
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:22,240
Speaker 6: Right up, when you were up up to pass, you

305
00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:23,800
Speaker 6: get it down when you get it and then up

306
00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:24,880
Speaker 6: to pass or.

307
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:31,160
Speaker 1: You know whatever, you know, Okay, we'll figure it out. Okay,

308
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:43,760
Speaker 1: here we go. Mm hmm, what I haven't ideas? We

309
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,000
Speaker 1: got this guy talk. Okay, it's not lifted. So that

310
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:49,000
Speaker 1: you don't dream that was the wrong life.

311
00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:54,360
Speaker 5: The five Oh no, that's not it.

312
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:58,480
Speaker 1: It's a five O or the cops.

313
00:14:56,480 --> 00:15:03,920
Speaker 5: The first two letters, the first latter is the police post.

314
00:15:04,080 --> 00:15:10,840
Speaker 1: Yeah like something back like yeah, like.

315
00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:14,280
Speaker 9: Like if I'm responding when you shoot somebody but stabbing

316
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:14,840
Speaker 9: them in the back?

317
00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:22,440
Speaker 1: No, next, can you smell the roses? What's what's the

318
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:27,080
Speaker 1: what the it's cookie with the rock? Yeah, yeah, you're

319
00:15:27,120 --> 00:15:30,400
Speaker 1: the worst. She's got a big booty. She's dating this

320
00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:34,920
Speaker 1: young rapper. Yeah, I do that? What I mean? Blank

321
00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:37,520
Speaker 1: and flow? What? Wait?

322
00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:41,800
Speaker 6: I literally was like yeah, yeah, yeah, Okay, you're we're done.

323
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:50,360
Speaker 1: Oh wait, I love I just keep Yeah, yeah you're dead.

324
00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:50,640
Speaker 4: OK.

325
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:52,680
Speaker 1: Maybe we shouldn't have done guy talking.

326
00:15:52,960 --> 00:15:55,640
Speaker 4: Let's girls talk. Wait, what how do I get back?

327
00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,480
Speaker 4: Oh my god, I didn't say token black friend?

328
00:15:58,480 --> 00:15:59,960
Speaker 1: What does that say on the top? Is that the score?

329
00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:04,160
Speaker 1: Token black friends? I don't know what that means? Why

330
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:06,200
Speaker 1: is it there? I guess I get two friends? Oh,

331
00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:06,600
Speaker 1: you're the.

332
00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:09,640
Speaker 6: Token black man, which means you don't know much the

333
00:16:09,680 --> 00:16:12,840
Speaker 6: choken because that missed girl?

334
00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:14,200
Speaker 1: How do you know?

335
00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:28,080
Speaker 10: Okay, we're doing girl talk? Okay, uh empire? Yeah, but

336
00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:29,600
Speaker 10: what Taji.

337
00:16:31,960 --> 00:16:32,160
Speaker 1: House?

338
00:16:32,280 --> 00:16:32,400
Speaker 2: Was it?

339
00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:38,760
Speaker 4: Atlanta, She asked, she she's going about, she's she's beending.

340
00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:43,000
Speaker 1: What the I don't know, girl? What then is this?

341
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:48,200
Speaker 4: Her first name is African and African Africa Kenya, Kenya.

342
00:16:48,760 --> 00:16:50,280
Speaker 1: You know you guys are so stupid.

343
00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:53,360
Speaker 4: Oh my god, I mean he was a rapper in

344
00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:56,880
Speaker 4: the early two thousands. He was real small and short building. Yeah,

345
00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:02,280
Speaker 4: you were just talking about him. It's others of her child?

346
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:03,120
Speaker 1: Is this baby daddy?

347
00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:03,360
Speaker 5: Yes?

348
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:08,280
Speaker 1: Oh, it's just when you your nails are like white

349
00:17:08,359 --> 00:17:11,000
Speaker 1: and then you have a friendship. Yeah, pink, pink and

350
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:11,600
Speaker 1: pink and white.

351
00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:14,080
Speaker 4: Yeah you know you said it, but yeah, okay, yeah,

352
00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:16,480
Speaker 4: which is she's on the Breakfast Club.

353
00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:20,880
Speaker 1: She's the only girl on Breakfast Club. I know, Charlotte

354
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:25,560
Speaker 1: man and yeah, I don't know, but I have glitter

355
00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:27,720
Speaker 1: crylic jail nails.

356
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:31,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's done, Nils Kenya Moore Zane.

357
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:33,520
Speaker 1: Why would I say I've made up with him once?

358
00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:39,199
Speaker 1: That is so embarrassing? Old? Were you like fifteen? Are

359
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:43,480
Speaker 1: how tall? Wait? Like my hand? He wasn't in high

360
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:45,760
Speaker 1: school too. He was not in high school though, but

361
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:49,520
Speaker 1: we have all the high school parties. I don't know

362
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:52,399
Speaker 1: how it must have been like ninth grade Actually.

363
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,440
Speaker 6: I worked at Whole Foods on Sepulvida, and I met

364
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:56,040
Speaker 6: all the niggers.

365
00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:59,160
Speaker 1: Pushing cards in the parking line, like to pull it up. Really,

366
00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:00,400
Speaker 1: she's over there.

367
00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:03,639
Speaker 6: Yeah, when I was sixteen that I was pitching cards

368
00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:06,480
Speaker 6: and bagging and I was obviously doing a bunch of

369
00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:10,119
Speaker 6: other ship too. That wasn't a little yeah girl French

370
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:12,240
Speaker 6: manager angel angela Ye, yeah.

371
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:13,320
Speaker 1: No, I didn't know her.

372
00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:17,320
Speaker 6: Okay, Well that was a semi successful round for the

373
00:18:17,359 --> 00:18:19,560
Speaker 6: culture that you came back.

374
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:24,560
Speaker 1: You came back myself. You're all your whole black side. Yeah,

375
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:26,560
Speaker 1: I forgot to see what my score was. It's gonna be.

376
00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:27,440
Speaker 1: There's still no damn.

377
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:29,680
Speaker 6: I'm sure I'm not the token black friend. I'm sure

378
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:33,920
Speaker 6: like much better through and through African.

379
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:39,440
Speaker 1: African Jammi La Jammy Jamila, and it's African name, y'all.

380
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:42,119
Speaker 1: Well it's Arabic. But whatever have you guys seen the

381
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:47,280
Speaker 1: Childish Cambino? Yeah? Did we forgot to make you watch it?

382
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:49,280
Speaker 1: I don't watch a thing. I just watched the facts

383
00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:51,359
Speaker 1: me too, I did. I didn't watch the all thing,

384
00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:57,040
Speaker 1: you know, just the fact I'm revoking. But I was like,

385
00:18:57,119 --> 00:18:59,200
Speaker 1: you know what I need to really watch this. Yeah,

386
00:18:59,359 --> 00:19:01,880
Speaker 1: you guys do. Wow, I'm almost embarrassed to be you guys.

387
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:02,280
Speaker 1: Just friend.

388
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,040
Speaker 4: I was sitting there yesterday and I was getting all

389
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:08,000
Speaker 4: these I saw him on Instagram like Sony reads portions

390
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,679
Speaker 4: of the video, so I felt like I watched it.

391
00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:15,360
Speaker 1: Right, and then oh, okay, but I haven't. Really it's

392
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,320
Speaker 1: really it's really good.

393
00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:19,040
Speaker 6: I mean, I'm I'm obsessed with him because his his

394
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:22,240
Speaker 6: creative ability and yeah, he's a fucking genius. I just

395
00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:24,280
Speaker 6: want to make out with him, just so maybe sprinkle

396
00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:26,359
Speaker 6: some of that on me just a little bit, just

397
00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:27,960
Speaker 6: a little bit. I just think, I just I'm I'm

398
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:32,920
Speaker 6: a sapiost what is it called the sapio. Yeah, when

399
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:33,960
Speaker 6: you're like like people's minds.

400
00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:34,880
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna pause.

401
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:37,320
Speaker 4: We're gonna take a quick break because apparently my child's

402
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:57,760
Speaker 4: having a beltown. Oh shit, okay, sorry for that break.

403
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 4: My child was highly upset when through the door. But anyway,

404
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,480
Speaker 4: during that break, we watched the Childish Gambino video. So

405
00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:08,720
Speaker 4: now we're fully up to date. Jamila, I'm welcome. Yeah,

406
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:12,800
Speaker 4: I'm glad you watched it. It was very deep and symbolic, symbolic,

407
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:16,440
Speaker 4: which was ironic that it came out during this time

408
00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:17,560
Speaker 4: with all this Kanye shit.

409
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,000
Speaker 1: That's so true. I mean, I don't know if it was.

410
00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:22,000
Speaker 1: I don't I think it was just happened to be

411
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:24,000
Speaker 1: at the same time. Yeah, you know, but I think

412
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,240
Speaker 1: that was that was actually genius.

413
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:30,440
Speaker 4: That was actually and he's an actual genius that doesn't

414
00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:31,399
Speaker 4: want to be called a genius.

415
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:34,320
Speaker 6: He didn't even self label himself a genius. He just

416
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:40,560
Speaker 6: did genius shit and we can all recognize it. Usually

417
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:42,360
Speaker 6: that's what happens when you're a genius and you don't

418
00:20:42,359 --> 00:20:43,240
Speaker 6: have to tell everybody.

419
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:45,280
Speaker 1: Most of them don't like to say it.

420
00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:47,679
Speaker 6: Most of them don't like to be called a genius

421
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:51,400
Speaker 6: because they're humble, like Ericas, Like Erica.

422
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:53,000
Speaker 1: The girl in the club is saying, you're still humble.

423
00:20:53,040 --> 00:21:02,159
Speaker 1: Oh I'm a genius. No, yeah, thought's pretty powerful. I'm

424
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:04,960
Speaker 1: proud for this album. I want to watch it again,

425
00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:07,359
Speaker 1: I know, and I'm like deeply, and I want to

426
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:09,680
Speaker 1: go to the concert. I want to just be his

427
00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:12,960
Speaker 1: friend really bad. I want to be invited to the cookout.

428
00:21:13,600 --> 00:21:16,760
Speaker 1: He has kids too, he's a dad. He's two kids.

429
00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:20,240
Speaker 1: I didn't have that either. One's like a baby too.

430
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:23,840
Speaker 1: And then I think it's a new born. I never

431
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 1: knew this. Yeah, he's low key. Did you watch it?

432
00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:27,879
Speaker 1: I can that much more now.

433
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:29,880
Speaker 6: Yeah, because he's a dad. And do you just watch

434
00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:32,720
Speaker 6: a stand up on Netflix? No, I'm like this month

435
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:34,520
Speaker 6: just does everything that's good.

436
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:35,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

437
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:36,920
Speaker 4: He's a writer, he's a rapper, he's a dad. He's

438
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:41,440
Speaker 4: a director, dancer, active singer, and a rapper.

439
00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:45,119
Speaker 1: And oh, I hope you have this recorded because I

440
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:47,800
Speaker 1: don't have cable. Did you watch Saturday A Live Saturday

441
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:48,800
Speaker 1: Night Live? No, I missed it.

442
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:51,840
Speaker 6: We can watch it online. He was on this weekend right, Yeah,

443
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:54,679
Speaker 6: Donald Glover and Childish Gambino shut up?

444
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:56,880
Speaker 4: Yes, so he was the he was the Donald Glover

445
00:21:56,960 --> 00:21:58,879
Speaker 4: the actor, and the Chilish Gambino was the performer.

446
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:05,040
Speaker 1: Nice fucking god. I love that me too. I want

447
00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:07,359
Speaker 1: to beat him when I grew up. Oh he's awesome.

448
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:07,680
Speaker 4: Yeah.

449
00:22:09,280 --> 00:22:13,800
Speaker 1: But anyway, so I guess getting into today's topic, I

450
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:16,239
Speaker 1: think we, like I said, we didn't really think of one.

451
00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:18,479
Speaker 1: Oh no we did. We did think of one now

452
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:21,679
Speaker 1: because I think we would have want to talk about about.

453
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:24,119
Speaker 4: Maintaining how how you can still be a mom and

454
00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:28,560
Speaker 4: still do what you wanna do touching on just everything

455
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,160
Speaker 4: that that comes with, like how to be the best mom.

456
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,560
Speaker 4: But you have to, like we were talking about our

457
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:35,520
Speaker 4: inst A story today, checking your ego and which has

458
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:37,760
Speaker 4: to do with a lot with I mean, I think

459
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:39,720
Speaker 4: as a parent we have to do that a lot,

460
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:43,040
Speaker 4: you know, checking ourselves and realizing it's not all about

461
00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:44,520
Speaker 4: discuss anymore.

462
00:22:45,240 --> 00:22:51,760
Speaker 6: Yeah, and also maintaining like our our whole selves post mommyhood,

463
00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:54,159
Speaker 6: you know, like still being able to be this not

464
00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:56,879
Speaker 6: the same but somewhat the same person after you have

465
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 6: a baby, because I think there's like this huge unrealist

466
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:04,080
Speaker 6: expectation that you've suddenly morphed into sister Mary mm hmm,

467
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:05,359
Speaker 6: because you're somebody's mama.

468
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:09,840
Speaker 1: Clearly that's not the case. I feel like that was

469
00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:11,520
Speaker 1: the case for me when I first had Irie. I

470
00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:13,359
Speaker 1: felt like I really did. I don't know why. No

471
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:14,920
Speaker 1: one told me I had to be a certain way,

472
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:16,720
Speaker 1: but for some reason, like I did, I felt like

473
00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:18,680
Speaker 1: I couldn't do certain things. I felt like those days

474
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:22,080
Speaker 1: were over. I couldn't. I don't know, I just I

475
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 1: fell into whatever I thought society expected of me. M

476
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:27,400
Speaker 1: Did you feel that way too? Absolutely?

477
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:29,879
Speaker 5: I mean sure, And also even now I feel like

478
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:32,600
Speaker 5: I'm now stepping out of it even more.

479
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:32,920
Speaker 1: You know.

480
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,760
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a process because we have the first recognize

481
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:39,320
Speaker 6: that it's even this this invisible thing even exists. But

482
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:43,600
Speaker 6: I think like just socially like us as women in general,

483
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:45,960
Speaker 6: that we're put under so much scrutiny and there's so

484
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:49,879
Speaker 6: much like weird expectation and like like we're not human

485
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:53,159
Speaker 6: like men, you know, And it's I just I've.

486
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:55,359
Speaker 1: Begun to realize that more that I've tried to step

487
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 1: out of that, you know.

488
00:23:56,960 --> 00:23:59,480
Speaker 6: Just there's so much as women period, especially as moms,

489
00:23:59,520 --> 00:24:03,520
Speaker 6: like expect and like stereotypes that are supposed to be

490
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:05,520
Speaker 6: fulfilled that are ridiculous.

491
00:24:05,840 --> 00:24:08,399
Speaker 1: How old were you when you had Peace? I was

492
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:12,000
Speaker 1: twenty three when I had her. Wait, so September October?

493
00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:15,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, no, actually I had her when Yeah, it's either

494
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:16,720
Speaker 5: like I was pregnant with her at twenty two.

495
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:20,399
Speaker 1: It's all fucking blurb. But either I think I was

496
00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:22,800
Speaker 1: twenty three and then I it was like my birthday

497
00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:24,160
Speaker 1: or something right after.

498
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:27,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, like before you got pregnant with her, were you

499
00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:30,440
Speaker 4: like living with a twenty book A twenty quotation mark

500
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 4: twenty three year old lifestyle, which I mean for me,

501
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,119
Speaker 4: maybe I just associated with like lots of you know,

502
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:36,600
Speaker 4: going out.

503
00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:38,399
Speaker 1: I mean, you're living in your own life, are you wild?

504
00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 5: I was like wild, But I've always had I have

505
00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:45,240
Speaker 5: like two extremes, like I'm either staying in the house

506
00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:48,680
Speaker 5: and doing like meditating or some shit, or I'm going

507
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:51,040
Speaker 5: out and I'm getting fucked up, Like I don't have

508
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,520
Speaker 5: a gray area. And I think now that I'm a mom,

509
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:57,119
Speaker 5: I have a great area. Yeah, but yeah, I was

510
00:24:57,280 --> 00:25:01,760
Speaker 5: like me and Gabo were going out drunk, fucking just.

511
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:07,040
Speaker 1: Like well each other. But we were just like, yeah,

512
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,199
Speaker 1: just being young, and I was like, oh, fuck forgot

513
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:15,879
Speaker 1: you can get pregnant. Yeah, what am I supposed to

514
00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:16,159
Speaker 1: do now?

515
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:17,240
Speaker 5: Yeah?

516
00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:21,480
Speaker 1: But yeah I was having fun. Like did you feel

517
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:24,400
Speaker 1: pressure for that fun to end abruptly? After peace?

518
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 6: I mean obviously, first of all, pregnancy is abrupt ending

519
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:27,920
Speaker 6: to any fun because you don't even get like a

520
00:25:27,920 --> 00:25:29,880
Speaker 6: two week notice to like drink your brains out first,

521
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 6: Like I'm pregnant.

522
00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:35,560
Speaker 7: You don't get it too like that ship Okay, so

523
00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:44,159
Speaker 7: I'm supper, I mean I I I mean I when I.

524
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:48,040
Speaker 4: First got pregnant, I was I was definitely living a

525
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:50,679
Speaker 4: very unhealthy lifestyle, so you got pregnant.

526
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,160
Speaker 1: But that times I was like, slow your ass down.

527
00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:54,439
Speaker 2: I know.

528
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:58,600
Speaker 1: I needed it. I needed it came at the right time.

529
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:00,240
Speaker 4: But then after that I was I don't know, I

530
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,320
Speaker 4: think because I was saying, like I was telling you guys,

531
00:26:02,359 --> 00:26:05,680
Speaker 4: like I didn't have any friends that had experienced pregnancy.

532
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:08,240
Speaker 1: Or motherhood, so I didn't really know. All I knew

533
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:12,280
Speaker 1: was like like what I saw on TV, or like

534
00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:15,680
Speaker 1: my how my mom raised me. And my mom was

535
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,359
Speaker 1: a very like you know, she.

536
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,119
Speaker 4: Was a single parent, didn't have really any money, and

537
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:23,320
Speaker 4: so she had to like her career was like at

538
00:26:23,359 --> 00:26:26,760
Speaker 4: the forefront of her life and my life.

539
00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:29,359
Speaker 1: For as far as I can remember, I never saw my.

540
00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:32,679
Speaker 4: Mom really go out and like have like hang out

541
00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:34,920
Speaker 4: and like have fun with her friends because she was

542
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,560
Speaker 4: so focused on trying to provide for me. So what

543
00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:39,640
Speaker 4: I felt, I think maybe that's where I got Maybe

544
00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 4: that's where I like got that example from that, like Okay, yeah, no,

545
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:44,280
Speaker 4: I not can't be fun anymore.

546
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:46,880
Speaker 1: Were fun. It's all about work, work, work, work, work work.

547
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:48,880
Speaker 1: That's how my mom was the same thing.

548
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:54,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think that's probably where it came from. And also, yeah,

549
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:55,440
Speaker 4: I just not have any example.

550
00:26:56,400 --> 00:26:58,520
Speaker 1: And I was like, I'm gonna be I'm gonna be

551
00:26:58,560 --> 00:26:59,639
Speaker 1: a someone now that I have a kid.

552
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:02,240
Speaker 4: I'm a bad mom if people see me drinking little Instagram,

553
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:06,040
Speaker 4: I pos so many smoking smoking pictures Even to this day,

554
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:08,359
Speaker 4: I'm weary. So I'm like, feel weird about it posting

555
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:11,400
Speaker 4: smoking pictures. That's that's still that weird thing I'm holding

556
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:14,160
Speaker 4: on to. Like being judged doesn't right.

557
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,160
Speaker 1: But there's like cannabis mom clubs and shit, I think

558
00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:20,359
Speaker 1: it's so cool. Yeah, there's like face they have like

559
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 1: Facebook for like is that smoke? Oh? I need to

560
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 1: find them. Yeah.

561
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,800
Speaker 6: I feel like, first of all, you can't even be

562
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:29,280
Speaker 6: a successful parent without weed because your nerves.

563
00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:30,000
Speaker 11: No.

564
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:32,040
Speaker 1: I swummed for a while after Peace. I was like

565
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,320
Speaker 1: fuck it, Yeah, I gotta do something that I don't

566
00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:38,160
Speaker 1: have the tools. I mean I smoke them again them. Yeah,

567
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:40,720
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I need to calm just my anxiety

568
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:44,719
Speaker 1: was just like crazy. That ship was so how how

569
00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:47,919
Speaker 1: did you kind of like find guide.

570
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 4: Yourself back into like who Felicia is as a as

571
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:53,160
Speaker 4: a woman outside of just being a parent.

572
00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:56,639
Speaker 1: I feel like working with my holistic doctor.

573
00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:58,920
Speaker 5: Well, okay, the very first thing that happened was I

574
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,800
Speaker 5: try to commit suicide because of postpartum depression.

575
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 1: Oh wow, maybe we should talk about that.

576
00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:04,720
Speaker 9: Wow.

577
00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:09,720
Speaker 1: Maybe wait, but like you really tried to like this

578
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:10,560
Speaker 1: way I've.

579
00:28:10,440 --> 00:28:13,159
Speaker 5: Done because I was just like I can't do it,

580
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,720
Speaker 5: and and it was and it was also really weird

581
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 5: for me because I'm like, Okay, I have this beautiful.

582
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 9: Life, this beautiful man, this beautiful but like I just

583
00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:24,560
Speaker 9: didn't get it myself up more so, and.

584
00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,800
Speaker 1: Then you felt guilty for having all these things and

585
00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:28,760
Speaker 1: it's still being sad. Yeah, yeah.

586
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:30,440
Speaker 5: And then I think a lot of people don't know

587
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:32,840
Speaker 5: how to deal with mental health like a person. So

588
00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:36,159
Speaker 5: if I tell someone like, oh, I'm depressed, and it's like, oh,

589
00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:37,120
Speaker 5: are you being ungrateful?

590
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:40,040
Speaker 1: Really, I'm not being ungrateful. There's something really going on here.

591
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:42,400
Speaker 6: It's a monol and balance, but we're not taught to

592
00:28:42,600 --> 00:28:44,760
Speaker 6: like how to deal with it, right that dialogue?

593
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:48,920
Speaker 1: So yeah, when I went to the hospital, if.

594
00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:50,280
Speaker 4: You don't mind me asking, you don't have to share it,

595
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:53,520
Speaker 4: but like, how what was you? Did you try to

596
00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:54,000
Speaker 4: take pills?

597
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:57,400
Speaker 1: Yeah? Pills? How all this place at this time? Piece

598
00:28:57,600 --> 00:28:58,440
Speaker 1: was maybe like.

599
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:08,000
Speaker 5: God, such a blur peace was probably one one or less,

600
00:29:08,120 --> 00:29:09,680
Speaker 5: like somewhere around there.

601
00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:10,480
Speaker 1: Yet it's lazy.

602
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 5: Went to the hospital and me and Gavin had went

603
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:14,960
Speaker 5: out that night and we were fighting so much because

604
00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 5: it was just like he was in a really unhealthy space.

605
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:19,560
Speaker 1: I was in a really unhealthy space. But we were

606
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 1: still together and it was just like a baby, it's.

607
00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 4: The hardest year you'll ever have on your relationship. Oh

608
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 4: my god, you think it's like the happiest ship, Like

609
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:30,960
Speaker 4: we have a baby. It's the worst year.

610
00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:32,720
Speaker 5: And then it's like you're both because I feel like

611
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:34,440
Speaker 5: with the second kid, maybe it won't be as bad

612
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:35,320
Speaker 5: because now I'm like, all right.

613
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:37,400
Speaker 1: We've got a gryprint for the most part. But I'm

614
00:29:37,440 --> 00:29:39,280
Speaker 1: just like, yo, what the fuck is going on? And

615
00:29:39,320 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 1: it just happened.

616
00:29:40,360 --> 00:29:43,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, So that happened. And then Gavin took me to

617
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:47,160
Speaker 5: the hospital and they wouldn't let me go. The psychiatrist

618
00:29:47,240 --> 00:29:49,640
Speaker 5: that's in there, she's like, oh no, you have to

619
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:51,520
Speaker 5: wait until the morning time. I'm like, not around, fine,

620
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 5: Like I'm gonna be good Sonnett avoided drinking whatever.

621
00:29:55,200 --> 00:30:00,480
Speaker 1: So this woman came in there before I left, and

622
00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 1: she was a nurse and she's like, you need to get.

623
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:05,280
Speaker 5: It together or they're gonna take your baby away and

624
00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 5: your baby's gonna be in the system.

625
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:09,000
Speaker 1: What Yeah, And so I was just because she was

626
00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 1: like because you're a threat, Like you're a threat to yourself. Yeah, yeah,

627
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:13,880
Speaker 1: that daddy don't matter.

628
00:30:14,920 --> 00:30:16,760
Speaker 5: I can't believe that's what she told you, as if

629
00:30:16,760 --> 00:30:18,760
Speaker 5: the dad wasn't like didn't bring you to the hospital

630
00:30:18,840 --> 00:30:20,640
Speaker 5: right or sitting next to me right, Like what do

631
00:30:20,680 --> 00:30:20,959
Speaker 5: you mean?

632
00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:23,680
Speaker 1: Like what about? It's so crazy. So then the.

633
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 5: Doctor came in and she was just explaining to me

634
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:28,200
Speaker 5: like I have a really bad postparting depression and like

635
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,520
Speaker 5: it's okay if you need help. Because they kind of

636
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:32,800
Speaker 5: helped me to identify on another level, you know, or

637
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,080
Speaker 5: just even fully recognize like this is what's going on.

638
00:30:35,840 --> 00:30:39,560
Speaker 1: So then that was kind of like the first realization

639
00:30:39,720 --> 00:30:41,800
Speaker 1: of like, oh, it's not me yeah, and like it's

640
00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:44,600
Speaker 1: gotten too far. So I went to a.

641
00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:47,520
Speaker 5: Psychiatrist and then he got me on lexipro for a

642
00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:50,600
Speaker 5: little while to like stabilize myself. But then I was

643
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:53,360
Speaker 5: after a while when I'm like kind of getting more air,

644
00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:55,720
Speaker 5: I'm like, but it's still covering something up, Like yeah,

645
00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:57,080
Speaker 5: you're you're not at the rid of.

646
00:30:57,080 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 1: The problem, right, right.

647
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:01,360
Speaker 5: So then I started working with holistic doctor and she's

648
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:03,719
Speaker 5: and do you do a saliva test and it can

649
00:31:03,760 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 5: tell you like your chemical imbalances like everything.

650
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:13,280
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Medymber, it's the shit. And she was just like,

651
00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:15,120
Speaker 1: first of all, your learns to gluten.

652
00:31:15,320 --> 00:31:17,680
Speaker 5: You need to stop doing that because it's it's inflaming

653
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:18,720
Speaker 5: me from the inside.

654
00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:21,080
Speaker 1: So it's like, oh, I look normal, but it was

655
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:22,840
Speaker 1: like kind of swelling my brain a little bit.

656
00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 5: And even now when I've cut it out of my diet,

657
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:27,000
Speaker 5: I always thought that it was normal to kind of

658
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:28,840
Speaker 5: like everything to be a little bit foggy.

659
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 1: She's like, no, it's the gluten. That was a big thing.

660
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:33,760
Speaker 1: Then she was like, you're not producing serotonin, which is

661
00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 1: the chemicals that makes you happy.

662
00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:37,680
Speaker 5: Yeah, so she was like, you're kind of in the negative.

663
00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:40,000
Speaker 5: But it was just I just had the baby. It

664
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 5: was like depletion of nutrients.

665
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:43,160
Speaker 1: It's just like all this shit. How do you start

666
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:45,600
Speaker 1: producing serotonin? Naturally you have to take well, you can

667
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:48,080
Speaker 1: take five htp and that kind of like activates it.

668
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,960
Speaker 1: And then she's like, your body's not producing histamine. Like

669
00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:52,160
Speaker 1: it was so much shit.

670
00:31:52,600 --> 00:31:57,600
Speaker 5: So I started working with her for maybe like three months,

671
00:31:57,840 --> 00:32:00,400
Speaker 5: and every I was just like, I can breathe. And

672
00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:02,200
Speaker 5: then that's when I was like able to work out,

673
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:04,120
Speaker 5: able to read a book again. Like there was so

674
00:32:04,240 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 5: much shit I couldn't do, and I felt like I

675
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:10,200
Speaker 5: wasn't myself for so long. And that was like the

676
00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:12,680
Speaker 5: beginning of like, OK, fuck that shit.

677
00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:12,959
Speaker 4: Right.

678
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:15,320
Speaker 5: So now that piece is almost four, I'm like, oh,

679
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:16,960
Speaker 5: I really feel like myself, Like I feel like I

680
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:18,920
Speaker 5: look good, I feel like I get up and I

681
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:19,720
Speaker 5: do what I need to do.

682
00:32:19,960 --> 00:32:23,080
Speaker 4: You know, does it make you nervous to have another

683
00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:25,000
Speaker 4: child because you're like work or do you think you

684
00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 4: have all the tools now to like push through if

685
00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:33,080
Speaker 4: you did have postpartum depression, you could identify it better, yes,

686
00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:33,800
Speaker 4: push through it.

687
00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:34,240
Speaker 1: Yeah.

688
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:36,920
Speaker 5: And at first I was really nervous because I was

689
00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:39,000
Speaker 5: like fuck, like and Gavin's like no, no, no, he

690
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:39,800
Speaker 5: was like terrified.

691
00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:41,200
Speaker 1: He's like no, no, no, I don't think I want

692
00:32:41,240 --> 00:32:43,040
Speaker 1: another kid, And I'm like no, but it's gonna be okay.

693
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:47,520
Speaker 1: But now that I think, I it's different if you

694
00:32:47,640 --> 00:32:49,520
Speaker 1: like talk about it, but then when you're really living it,

695
00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:51,240
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I think that will be fine.

696
00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:53,880
Speaker 5: I feel confident now because yes, I have the tools

697
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:56,880
Speaker 5: for what helps me, Like I have the fucking recipe now.

698
00:32:57,400 --> 00:33:01,120
Speaker 5: But if I hadn't gone this far, then I'm probably

699
00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:02,680
Speaker 5: be like I don't want more kids.

700
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:05,360
Speaker 1: Like right, if you hadn't come out of it fully

701
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:07,040
Speaker 1: come out of it and see, yeah, you can look

702
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:08,920
Speaker 1: back at it now and identify it. Yeah.

703
00:33:09,160 --> 00:33:11,040
Speaker 5: Like there's like a couple of things like I'm probably

704
00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:13,080
Speaker 5: gonna work out my own entire pregnancy like a fucking

705
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:15,520
Speaker 5: crazy lady, but I don't give a shit because that

706
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:17,160
Speaker 5: creates more serotonin in your body.

707
00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:18,000
Speaker 1: It makes you happy.

708
00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:22,560
Speaker 5: I'm probably gonna keep on taking a shitload of vitamins

709
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,800
Speaker 5: because the platina has all the shit and I didn't

710
00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:27,720
Speaker 5: realize all your vitamins are gone down and I didn't

711
00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:30,320
Speaker 5: do it, like but also there was nobody to kind

712
00:33:30,360 --> 00:33:33,440
Speaker 5: of tell me, like to guide you, like make sure.

713
00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:34,160
Speaker 1: You're doing these things.

714
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:34,400
Speaker 2: You know.

715
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:37,200
Speaker 1: It's like there's so many I was.

716
00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:39,840
Speaker 5: Also very afraid to ask for help from people, so

717
00:33:39,960 --> 00:33:40,959
Speaker 5: because you felt guilty.

718
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:43,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I was just like I didn't know how

719
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 1: to ask for help because my mom never really asked

720
00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:47,520
Speaker 1: for help, being a single mom. She's just like you

721
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:48,360
Speaker 1: get up and you do it.

722
00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:49,920
Speaker 5: So I always feel like I had to be strong,

723
00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:52,440
Speaker 5: so I almost hadn't let move the ego out of

724
00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:53,360
Speaker 5: the way and that and just.

725
00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 1: Like bitch ask for help, like I need help. Yeah,

726
00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 1: Like so I'm might ask for help, like you know.

727
00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:00,800
Speaker 5: So there's certain things and I think I judge myself

728
00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 5: about like no, you're not allowed to drink, You're.

729
00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:03,960
Speaker 1: Not allowed to do this. But then I'm like, but

730
00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:06,760
Speaker 1: you're not happy, so just want Yeah.

731
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:09,279
Speaker 5: So even now as a mom and as a woman,

732
00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:13,520
Speaker 5: I feel like more myself from before I was pregnant

733
00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:13,919
Speaker 5: with Peace.

734
00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:16,239
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm like a hybrid version of like

735
00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:20,000
Speaker 1: that bitch like you know, so, yeah, don't you feel

736
00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:20,520
Speaker 1: like a woman?

737
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 4: Yes, having a kid will make it feel it now

738
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:26,759
Speaker 4: I'm a woman like a write a past.

739
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:28,320
Speaker 1: I was just thinking about this the other day. I

740
00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:30,840
Speaker 1: was I think I did a little post about it,

741
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:32,840
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh my god, I'm not a

742
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:37,600
Speaker 1: grown woman. I'm an adult. I'm like, yo, like I'm

743
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:40,240
Speaker 1: asking my baby daddy for like a Gucci bag for mothers.

744
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:43,560
Speaker 1: Who the fuck do I think?

745
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:46,279
Speaker 8: I'm like, Oh no, I'm just getting back from the

746
00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:46,799
Speaker 8: fleet marketing.

747
00:34:47,320 --> 00:34:50,200
Speaker 1: No, bitch like me that ship.

748
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:53,560
Speaker 5: So I'm just like, it's just it's weird. I'm like,

749
00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:57,719
Speaker 5: I feel like a grown ass woman, like yeah, it's cool.

750
00:34:58,080 --> 00:34:58,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, I like it.

751
00:34:59,520 --> 00:34:59,840
Speaker 2: I like it.

752
00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:02,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, I like it too because I feel like before child,

753
00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:04,839
Speaker 4: my child, I would say that I was a woman,

754
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:07,160
Speaker 4: and I'd be like, I'm a grown ass why you know,

755
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:08,960
Speaker 4: like for you to get mad at someone or like

756
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 4: who the fuck do you now? I'm like, no, for real,

757
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 4: I am a woman right right? And I also but

758
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:14,759
Speaker 4: I also know I'm a woman because I don't have

759
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:16,759
Speaker 4: to express that I'm a woman to you because I

760
00:35:16,840 --> 00:35:17,400
Speaker 4: know that I am.

761
00:35:17,880 --> 00:35:20,799
Speaker 1: You feel the vibe now, you know you know who

762
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:21,400
Speaker 1: the fuck I am?

763
00:35:22,080 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 2: Right?

764
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:24,160
Speaker 1: I made this human right here?

765
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:24,520
Speaker 2: Right?

766
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:26,040
Speaker 1: But what'd you do?

767
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:31,000
Speaker 4: Right? It's crazy how your kids teach you those things

768
00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:33,600
Speaker 4: and they don't even realize it because she.

769
00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:37,200
Speaker 1: Definitely I mean patience all those things, Like I did.

770
00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:39,239
Speaker 4: Not have that before and I still don't have it

771
00:35:39,320 --> 00:35:42,400
Speaker 4: all together all the way all the time, but my

772
00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:45,120
Speaker 4: patience has gotten extremely better.

773
00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:46,040
Speaker 1: It has to.

774
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:49,239
Speaker 5: Yeah, I literally would pray to God, like God, I

775
00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 5: mean patience, please give me patience, like on every level

776
00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:56,600
Speaker 5: of just like to untangling something or like being in trap,

777
00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:58,040
Speaker 5: like just patience.

778
00:35:58,120 --> 00:36:01,200
Speaker 1: I didn't have it, like I still don't fully have it.

779
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:03,319
Speaker 5: But when I say my little prayer in the morning,

780
00:36:03,360 --> 00:36:05,400
Speaker 5: I get a little sprinkled Yeah, here you go.

781
00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:10,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like, yeah, here's a kid too. Figure it out.

782
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 1: Fucking great. Yeah that patience.

783
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:17,480
Speaker 6: Well, I'm so happy you talked about that, because, like

784
00:36:18,000 --> 00:36:20,520
Speaker 6: mental illness is something like especially if like like the

785
00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:23,760
Speaker 6: black community, we don't discuss a lot. It's like, especially

786
00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 6: as black women. I feel like, first of all, in

787
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:30,399
Speaker 6: my family, we didn't talk about problems really and it's

788
00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 6: like you need to be strong, yeah, and you need

789
00:36:32,719 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 6: to work it out, you know, you figure it out

790
00:36:35,200 --> 00:36:36,080
Speaker 6: and you don't talk about it.

791
00:36:36,160 --> 00:36:39,960
Speaker 1: And like I mean like I can talk to people about.

792
00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:43,000
Speaker 6: Stuff and I'm emotional, but it's not like it's not

793
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 6: like that, you know, even if I I feel like everything,

794
00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:48,720
Speaker 6: if it gets too mushy, you're weird, it's like to email,

795
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:51,279
Speaker 6: you know, Like that's not how we communicate with each other,

796
00:36:51,360 --> 00:36:51,840
Speaker 6: like even.

797
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:54,920
Speaker 1: My family now. But I talked to a therapist and

798
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 1: I was telling her like.

799
00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:59,600
Speaker 6: She was asking me like regular simple questions and I

800
00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:01,799
Speaker 6: was having a hard time, like like do you wake

801
00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:04,120
Speaker 6: up every morning, like what time you wake up?

802
00:37:04,239 --> 00:37:08,759
Speaker 1: And I was like ten thirty, So does my kid?

803
00:37:09,040 --> 00:37:09,680
Speaker 1: You make the bed?

804
00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 6: And I was like sometimes she's like there's signs of depression,

805
00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:16,520
Speaker 6: like just because because she's like, I'm like, I don't know.

806
00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,200
Speaker 1: What's wrong with me, Like maybe it's I'm lazy.

807
00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 6: She's like, sometimes depression doesn't look like sadness and weeping

808
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:23,000
Speaker 6: all the time, you know, like just because you don't,

809
00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:23,919
Speaker 6: That's what I was saying.

810
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:26,400
Speaker 1: I was like, like, people are poor, these are like

811
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:27,200
Speaker 1: first world.

812
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:29,640
Speaker 6: Problems, you know, And she was like that's not that's

813
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 6: not necessarily what depression looks like.

814
00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:34,720
Speaker 1: So I think, you know, not even recognizing like that, there's.

815
00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:38,680
Speaker 4: There's different signs than yeah, you think outright think depression

816
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:42,720
Speaker 4: look like like being sad, crying uncontrollably for no reason,

817
00:37:43,320 --> 00:37:46,520
Speaker 4: or you know, just moping, never wanted to leave the house.

818
00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:47,320
Speaker 2: No.

819
00:37:47,400 --> 00:37:49,200
Speaker 1: It hides in different ways, in different forms.

820
00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:55,680
Speaker 5: I have one friend and she is like she drinks

821
00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:57,960
Speaker 5: a lot, but it's always like I'm happy, everything's fine,

822
00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:00,200
Speaker 5: and I'm like, nah, but I thought that's me.

823
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:02,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, but I can literally see it, and I'm like,

824
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:03,560
Speaker 1: something's wrong.

825
00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 5: But she can't recognize it, you know, she doesn't like

826
00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:08,919
Speaker 5: and it's also not my job, right, I ain't trying

827
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:13,320
Speaker 5: to you inspired, be inspired, but I'm not fucking fixing

828
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:16,040
Speaker 5: you because it's like that's not how it works, you know.

829
00:38:16,560 --> 00:38:19,880
Speaker 1: But yeah, that that depression does come in like different

830
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,279
Speaker 1: forms for sure, And I heard that, like, especially with

831
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:23,280
Speaker 1: postpartum depression.

832
00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:25,239
Speaker 6: You think it's like then that happened, Like you can

833
00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:27,759
Speaker 6: experience only one like one month after having a baby

834
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:28,600
Speaker 6: and then it goes away.

835
00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:30,040
Speaker 1: Like I've read like up.

836
00:38:30,040 --> 00:38:32,800
Speaker 6: To three or four years you could experience postpartum, so

837
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:34,560
Speaker 6: that makes you have like a full toddler, and you're

838
00:38:34,600 --> 00:38:37,239
Speaker 6: like feeling that you're not associating it with with you know,

839
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:37,920
Speaker 6: like the fact that.

840
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:41,680
Speaker 4: You three years ago, you're like, if this is postpartum,

841
00:38:41,719 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 4: I'm just depressed, it's something that's just fucking wrong.

842
00:38:43,360 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 1: With me, right, you know what I was thinking.

843
00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:48,360
Speaker 5: I had this idea, but I guess this philosophy of

844
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:50,880
Speaker 5: you know, when guys are like, my baby mama tripping,

845
00:38:50,960 --> 00:38:52,680
Speaker 5: I'm like, but is she tripping or she just has

846
00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:54,239
Speaker 5: like no nutrients.

847
00:38:54,200 --> 00:39:00,359
Speaker 1: Because it's not Yeah, like, because that's also like part

848
00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:04,239
Speaker 1: of depression is in that space like a depleted yes,

849
00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 1: every part of you.

850
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:07,279
Speaker 5: Yeah, And I'm like, there are sometimes that I was

851
00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:09,080
Speaker 5: tripping off the ship and again was like you're tripping,

852
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:11,320
Speaker 5: You're crazy, and I'm like, no, it's just this, but

853
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:13,640
Speaker 5: it was like no, that was all forms of depression

854
00:39:13,719 --> 00:39:15,920
Speaker 5: that was coming out, is like anger and not being

855
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,520
Speaker 5: able to communicate, which is another problem in the back community.

856
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:20,160
Speaker 1: Don't know how to communicate.

857
00:39:20,280 --> 00:39:23,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I think I think when we did we

858
00:39:23,239 --> 00:39:26,120
Speaker 4: did an episode a few weeks back where we talked

859
00:39:26,120 --> 00:39:29,440
Speaker 4: about postpart of depression too and how your partner can

860
00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:32,320
Speaker 4: support you in it, but it's hard unless he unless

861
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:36,960
Speaker 4: he believes it, yeah, and recognize it and identify it.

862
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:40,560
Speaker 4: And like I think some of the things that they said,

863
00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:42,600
Speaker 4: like your partner can help by like showing up when

864
00:39:42,640 --> 00:39:44,160
Speaker 4: he says he's going to show up, which was a

865
00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:47,719
Speaker 4: big thing for me because like my partner at the time,

866
00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:49,600
Speaker 4: like May'd be like I'll be home at five, and

867
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:51,919
Speaker 4: you would come home at six thirty girl, and I'd

868
00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:53,359
Speaker 4: be like, maybe you said you'd be home at five.

869
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,280
Speaker 1: I've been home all day with this newborn.

870
00:39:56,360 --> 00:40:00,080
Speaker 4: I'm fucking exhausted, I'm tired, I'm angry, I'm cry and

871
00:40:00,160 --> 00:40:01,920
Speaker 4: now y'a, I'm gonna make you cry, and now we're

872
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 4: gonna fight, and and like you, like bitch, you are crazy.

873
00:40:04,560 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 1: I'm an hour late. What's the problem. And it's like

874
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 1: you don't even that hour.

875
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:13,200
Speaker 4: How much like those little things that you, like someone

876
00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:16,080
Speaker 4: else might think don't matter matter at that time. Yes,

877
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:18,520
Speaker 4: and you don't even in your normal in your normal

878
00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:21,279
Speaker 4: daily life when you aren't perhaps they don't matter. But

879
00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:23,640
Speaker 4: it's just like little things like that where your partner

880
00:40:23,719 --> 00:40:27,600
Speaker 4: it's so important that they can hopefully help you maybe.

881
00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:30,160
Speaker 1: I mean, it's very rare that I'm sure the man says, hey,

882
00:40:30,239 --> 00:40:31,799
Speaker 1: are you going to postpartum? Right?

883
00:40:32,040 --> 00:40:35,520
Speaker 4: But if he can identify it or you identify it

884
00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 4: for him or her and she can and he can

885
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:40,840
Speaker 4: help you, you know, get pushed through it.

886
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:42,280
Speaker 1: I think you need support.

887
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:43,840
Speaker 6: But this is a part of it, Like people have

888
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:45,640
Speaker 6: to talk about the shit to know it exists, you know,

889
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:46,799
Speaker 6: dialogue and there has.

890
00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:47,320
Speaker 1: To be a dialogue.

891
00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 6: Right, There's so many things like even us talking about

892
00:40:49,719 --> 00:40:52,840
Speaker 6: being like thinking not because we were told that we

893
00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:55,560
Speaker 6: have this perception of what like this Holy Mother looks

894
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:57,000
Speaker 6: like no one told us that.

895
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:58,319
Speaker 1: But from whatever there has to be.

896
00:40:58,280 --> 00:41:01,520
Speaker 6: A dialogue that says like like, no, I'm still human,

897
00:41:01,640 --> 00:41:03,680
Speaker 6: I'm still an adult woman, and I still can do

898
00:41:03,719 --> 00:41:06,279
Speaker 6: what the fuck I want. So like, unless there's no

899
00:41:06,320 --> 00:41:08,279
Speaker 6: one talking about it, those type of things, it's like

900
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:10,440
Speaker 6: a cycle. It's a cycle, and it's you know, especially

901
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:13,160
Speaker 6: in our community, especially in our age too, Like we're

902
00:41:13,239 --> 00:41:15,719
Speaker 6: not like old ass moms, so this is all new,

903
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 6: you know, it's foreign even like because we talked about

904
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:22,239
Speaker 6: this before we started diet, I never thought I never

905
00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:25,760
Speaker 6: thought about diet, and like, well, I guess some in depression,

906
00:41:25,840 --> 00:41:28,319
Speaker 6: you know what I mean, Like your gluten levels were

907
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:30,719
Speaker 6: fucking with you, and like even like consuming meat because

908
00:41:30,760 --> 00:41:34,200
Speaker 6: I'm super greedy and I was raised like pescatarian, But

909
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:35,239
Speaker 6: take me.

910
00:41:35,239 --> 00:41:37,560
Speaker 1: To a steakhouse and I'm not leaving without a steak.

911
00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:42,080
Speaker 6: But I'm sure that like what you're consuming also, you know,

912
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 6: plays the part in you know, your emotions and how

913
00:41:44,680 --> 00:41:45,120
Speaker 6: you feel.

914
00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:46,040
Speaker 2: It's true.

915
00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:48,840
Speaker 4: I mean I think I think about like you're so tiny,

916
00:41:49,000 --> 00:41:51,000
Speaker 4: and like you don't ever have to watch what you eat.

917
00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:54,360
Speaker 4: So maybe that's why diet is never a factory in

918
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:55,839
Speaker 4: your mind. You're like, well, it can't be what I'm

919
00:41:55,880 --> 00:41:58,640
Speaker 4: eating Yeah, but if you feel could you want ever

920
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:03,239
Speaker 4: diet or take things away way because there's no physical,

921
00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 4: physical ramifications from what you're eating, you know what I mean,

922
00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:08,759
Speaker 4: you don't associate.

923
00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:10,359
Speaker 1: It with my mental Yeah.

924
00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 6: And honestly, now that I'm like almost thirty, in like

925
00:42:14,520 --> 00:42:21,680
Speaker 6: six weeks, I'm realizing. I know, I know, I'm realizing

926
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:25,319
Speaker 6: a like your friend, like, I am a really happy,

927
00:42:25,400 --> 00:42:28,080
Speaker 6: go lucky person. I'm not like talking about my problems

928
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:30,359
Speaker 6: a lot. I'm a type of person like I feel

929
00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:33,359
Speaker 6: I'm always grateful. I'm like, I'm grateful even if I'm

930
00:42:33,360 --> 00:42:36,200
Speaker 6: like struggling like rhina is late, Like I'm grateful. I'm

931
00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:38,120
Speaker 6: grateful I have a place to play round too. But

932
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:40,640
Speaker 6: I even like I had to check myself like this,

933
00:42:40,800 --> 00:42:42,560
Speaker 6: you kinda do you know? I don't drink every day,

934
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:45,239
Speaker 6: but like when I do drink, I drink. So I'm like,

935
00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:47,640
Speaker 6: am I I'm trying to ask myself like is there

936
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:49,520
Speaker 6: something wrong with me? Or am I sad about something?

937
00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:52,200
Speaker 6: Is there something in my childhood like I don't remember

938
00:42:52,719 --> 00:42:55,080
Speaker 6: that I'm trying not to trigger or something. And especially

939
00:42:55,080 --> 00:42:56,759
Speaker 6: because my birthday is coming up and I'm going to

940
00:42:56,840 --> 00:42:59,239
Speaker 6: be thirty and I have this beautiful child, and like

941
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 6: there's these things I have to do. I'm just like

942
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:04,920
Speaker 6: trying to be really self reflective and like because I

943
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:07,839
Speaker 6: am I'm really rational in that way, Like I will

944
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:09,200
Speaker 6: question myself like am I wrong?

945
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:11,239
Speaker 1: Is that the right thing to say? How could I

946
00:43:11,280 --> 00:43:13,359
Speaker 1: have maybe offended that or anything? Like you know what's

947
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 1: wrong with me? So I think that's absolutely true. Like

948
00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 1: because I am skinny, I don't work out that often.

949
00:43:20,760 --> 00:43:23,080
Speaker 1: I don't make myself because I'm like, you don't have to.

950
00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:26,080
Speaker 6: I don't have to, and like I'll eat a crazy

951
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:27,880
Speaker 6: amount and then I'm thinking, like, damn, bitch, you have

952
00:43:27,920 --> 00:43:31,000
Speaker 6: a tape form like you're eating like every hour, like

953
00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:32,880
Speaker 6: there's something wrong with you. And now you got me

954
00:43:32,960 --> 00:43:34,319
Speaker 6: sitting up here thinking like I've got to go see

955
00:43:34,360 --> 00:43:35,440
Speaker 6: this alistic doctor.

956
00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:40,520
Speaker 1: Real I'll go with you. Yeah, I'm down. We gotta

957
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:42,400
Speaker 1: do this. Yeah, I mean it's just things like that

958
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:45,839
Speaker 1: you just don't even think about. Yeah, but I mean

959
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:47,120
Speaker 1: getting back.

960
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 4: To like being the mom, that being who you were

961
00:43:52,120 --> 00:43:55,600
Speaker 4: post baby, pre baby, and how like you get back

962
00:43:55,640 --> 00:44:00,920
Speaker 4: to that post baby, Like I think for me it's

963
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:04,360
Speaker 4: been more recent. Yeah, Like I've been more recently living

964
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:07,080
Speaker 4: the life that I want to live without, like I'm sharing.

965
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:10,760
Speaker 4: I'm here sharing that I that I have sex.

966
00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:11,480
Speaker 1: With a married couple.

967
00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:12,600
Speaker 4: You know what I mean?

968
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:14,759
Speaker 1: Like I never would have shared even if I was,

969
00:44:14,840 --> 00:44:17,719
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have never shared that before because that's just

970
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:21,120
Speaker 1: not what moms do. But what do moms do?

971
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 2: Right?

972
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:25,600
Speaker 1: Who knows? All moms are different? And you know what,

973
00:44:25,719 --> 00:44:26,239
Speaker 1: it's low key.

974
00:44:26,320 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 6: It's because there's things like I'm lie my visions and

975
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 6: it's liberating.

976
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:32,000
Speaker 1: It's liberating to be like, funk how you feel? This

977
00:44:32,160 --> 00:44:32,839
Speaker 1: is how I feel.

978
00:44:33,239 --> 00:44:35,760
Speaker 6: Fuck you and fuck you and fuck you too, because

979
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:38,080
Speaker 6: kid is because I'm a damn good mom. And then

980
00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:40,839
Speaker 6: it makes me realize like there's so many moms who

981
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:44,200
Speaker 6: are living under this fear in this rock and but

982
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:47,719
Speaker 6: you know what, the fuck that ship? But mostly imagine

983
00:44:47,800 --> 00:44:50,839
Speaker 6: how much you're like how much that affects our kids?

984
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:54,239
Speaker 6: Imagine like if we weren't happy, go lucky, like I'm

985
00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:55,839
Speaker 6: gonna drink on the weekends and funk, who I want

986
00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:56,480
Speaker 6: you on the weekends?

987
00:44:56,560 --> 00:44:58,799
Speaker 1: Type moms? Like who are?

988
00:44:59,080 --> 00:45:00,960
Speaker 6: Who would our kids think we were? You have to

989
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:03,359
Speaker 6: think of like are you being the best, happiest version

990
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:05,800
Speaker 6: of yourself? Because your kid might not be like just

991
00:45:05,880 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 6: like you said you saw you never saw your mom

992
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:11,000
Speaker 6: party or did anything. You're like your your kid may

993
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:13,480
Speaker 6: not even know you as like this full like really

994
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:13,800
Speaker 6: know you.

995
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:16,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, they know this, this this watered down version of

996
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:20,479
Speaker 1: you because you're pretending to be some this mom.

997
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:24,480
Speaker 6: I wanted to ask you, how do you do you

998
00:45:24,560 --> 00:45:29,400
Speaker 6: feel like you're like your baby's daddy, your man's You.

999
00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:32,839
Speaker 5: Say baby's dady all the time. I'm like, I think

1000
00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:34,640
Speaker 5: I think into the day, even the more I'm married,

1001
00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:35,319
Speaker 5: I'm still gonna be like.

1002
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:36,120
Speaker 1: My baby daddy.

1003
00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:37,640
Speaker 2: Too.

1004
00:45:38,160 --> 00:45:47,600
Speaker 1: That's just my baby's daddy. Can't I say zanny on

1005
00:45:47,719 --> 00:45:48,160
Speaker 1: my nerves?

1006
00:45:49,320 --> 00:45:49,440
Speaker 2: Do you?

1007
00:45:49,680 --> 00:45:51,920
Speaker 1: Did you feel any of that expectation for you to

1008
00:45:52,040 --> 00:45:53,239
Speaker 1: like be a certain way from him?

1009
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 5: No, it was me because Gavin was very like we're

1010
00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:01,799
Speaker 5: young parents, like we still we can still have fun,

1011
00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:02,799
Speaker 5: we can still turn up.

1012
00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:07,200
Speaker 1: It wasn't like, no, there wasn't a requirement by any means. Yeah,

1013
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:08,440
Speaker 1: I mean because I probably wants you to be like

1014
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:11,120
Speaker 1: this is how I dated like that? Where'd you go?

1015
00:46:11,440 --> 00:46:11,640
Speaker 10: Yeah?

1016
00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:12,320
Speaker 1: Exactly?

1017
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:13,200
Speaker 5: Sure?

1018
00:46:14,040 --> 00:46:17,360
Speaker 1: How have you because this is something we can't speak on,

1019
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:18,040
Speaker 1: like how have you.

1020
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:23,040
Speaker 6: Maintained you guys as like intimacy and relationship post baby, Like,

1021
00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:26,280
Speaker 6: how have you like maintained the relationship with a baby?

1022
00:46:26,320 --> 00:46:29,560
Speaker 1: How it was prior? You know, Well, actually it was

1023
00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:30,440
Speaker 1: really hard, and.

1024
00:46:30,480 --> 00:46:34,200
Speaker 5: I feel like now we're just kind of like getting

1025
00:46:34,239 --> 00:46:37,600
Speaker 5: it jump started again, you know, because it was like, yeah,

1026
00:46:37,600 --> 00:46:39,840
Speaker 5: we're still in a relationship, but we were both really unhappy.

1027
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:42,960
Speaker 1: So then it was just like arguing and just like

1028
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:44,160
Speaker 1: stupid shit all.

1029
00:46:44,080 --> 00:46:47,400
Speaker 5: The time until we got to a point of like okay,

1030
00:46:47,640 --> 00:46:51,399
Speaker 5: we're ein gonna go to therapy and figure it out,

1031
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:53,520
Speaker 5: or it's like I'm about to go left and you're

1032
00:46:53,520 --> 00:46:55,200
Speaker 5: about to go right, and then just we can just

1033
00:46:55,320 --> 00:46:56,320
Speaker 5: be cool and be friends.

1034
00:46:56,400 --> 00:46:56,520
Speaker 2: You know.

1035
00:46:57,120 --> 00:46:58,759
Speaker 5: But both of us knew we wanted to be with

1036
00:46:58,840 --> 00:47:00,279
Speaker 5: one another, but we're like we kind of got to

1037
00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:04,240
Speaker 5: like sift through all the bullshit. So honestly, my the therapist,

1038
00:47:04,400 --> 00:47:05,759
Speaker 5: I'm like, bitch, I.

1039
00:47:05,920 --> 00:47:08,759
Speaker 6: Love you, because then it's like your couple is married,

1040
00:47:08,760 --> 00:47:11,120
Speaker 6: I mean a couple of therapist therapists and we've been

1041
00:47:11,200 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 6: doing it for.

1042
00:47:11,719 --> 00:47:14,000
Speaker 1: Like almost two months now, and I'm like, and it's crazy,

1043
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,800
Speaker 1: because did you find her referral? It was a referral

1044
00:47:16,960 --> 00:47:19,560
Speaker 1: from his therapist and he would always tell you, well,

1045
00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:20,040
Speaker 1: that's amazing.

1046
00:47:20,080 --> 00:47:21,520
Speaker 4: First of all, I mean that rupt you, but that

1047
00:47:21,840 --> 00:47:23,960
Speaker 4: you're man as a black man is going to see

1048
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:24,360
Speaker 4: a therapist.

1049
00:47:24,560 --> 00:47:26,120
Speaker 5: So he's been going to see a therapist since he

1050
00:47:26,239 --> 00:47:28,520
Speaker 5: was like young. But you know what it is, though,

1051
00:47:28,600 --> 00:47:30,799
Speaker 5: Gavin has really good parents, Like not saying that our

1052
00:47:30,840 --> 00:47:32,400
Speaker 5: parents are any less thing because they don't fucking tell

1053
00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:35,080
Speaker 5: us to do that. But his mom was a psych major.

1054
00:47:35,200 --> 00:47:37,960
Speaker 5: She has a master's in psychology, so she understands it

1055
00:47:38,000 --> 00:47:40,200
Speaker 5: on a whole other level, and she understands the black community.

1056
00:47:40,320 --> 00:47:42,759
Speaker 1: So she's very big on like, you need to do

1057
00:47:42,880 --> 00:47:43,239
Speaker 1: this right.

1058
00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:45,440
Speaker 5: And his dad is healthy, right, and his dad was

1059
00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:48,800
Speaker 5: a professional football player, so they're very successful black people

1060
00:47:48,880 --> 00:47:51,239
Speaker 5: that are like, oh, you know what the fucking roots are, Like,

1061
00:47:51,680 --> 00:47:53,080
Speaker 5: my kid's not about to be out.

1062
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:56,359
Speaker 6: Here right because I didn't get you a therapist when

1063
00:47:56,400 --> 00:47:58,399
Speaker 6: you were twelve, right, shit right?

1064
00:47:58,760 --> 00:48:00,359
Speaker 1: Yeah? I think it was like when he was nine.

1065
00:48:00,480 --> 00:48:03,520
Speaker 5: So yeah, so he was like, fee, maybe you need

1066
00:48:03,520 --> 00:48:05,239
Speaker 5: to go to therapists and I'm like, yeah, I look

1067
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:08,239
Speaker 5: like and I would go. And I'm like it's not

1068
00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:10,399
Speaker 5: really anything that I'm not dealing with because I feel

1069
00:48:10,440 --> 00:48:12,000
Speaker 5: like I already, like you said, I kind of do

1070
00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:14,799
Speaker 5: self inventory on myself a lot. So when we went

1071
00:48:14,840 --> 00:48:16,520
Speaker 5: to a therapist and I'm like, oh, I'm telling him

1072
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:18,440
Speaker 5: to do was just clean up his ship, like and

1073
00:48:18,560 --> 00:48:20,319
Speaker 5: then I'll fucking throw that ass back, but what.

1074
00:48:23,280 --> 00:48:25,960
Speaker 8: A dirty ass house, right right? And and I can't

1075
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:28,400
Speaker 8: focused on the ass back. There are certain things that

1076
00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:29,800
Speaker 8: I like and there's certain things that you like, but

1077
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:32,120
Speaker 8: we got to compromise. And so the therapist help us

1078
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:33,680
Speaker 8: to understand, like what you're.

1079
00:48:33,480 --> 00:48:35,319
Speaker 1: Saying is not wrong. What you're saying is not wrong,

1080
00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:37,480
Speaker 1: but if you bring them together, you guys can coexist,

1081
00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:40,400
Speaker 1: you know. So then when so then it's.

1082
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:41,880
Speaker 9: Like he picks the shoes, I'm like, okay, cool, so

1083
00:48:41,920 --> 00:48:43,400
Speaker 9: now I can go sec you did, like it's an

1084
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:47,600
Speaker 9: easy thing to do that easy. I'm like it was

1085
00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 9: so easy, right, And he just be like yeah, yeah,

1086
00:48:55,920 --> 00:48:57,160
Speaker 9: when you talking about this in therapy.

1087
00:48:57,600 --> 00:49:00,640
Speaker 5: So even now, like we haven't even had if we

1088
00:49:00,680 --> 00:49:02,920
Speaker 5: have a disagreement, we can now talk about it like

1089
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:05,960
Speaker 5: a healthy conversation instead of it being like, oh, what

1090
00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:08,239
Speaker 5: I'm saying and what you're what you're saying right, Like

1091
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:10,600
Speaker 5: I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but.

1092
00:49:10,640 --> 00:49:12,640
Speaker 1: I'm like but you, he was low key the problem,

1093
00:49:12,880 --> 00:49:17,239
Speaker 1: right you. I'm like, I'm actually really cool and really easy.

1094
00:49:17,320 --> 00:49:20,040
Speaker 1: I'm like, just do what I say to do. Just

1095
00:49:20,120 --> 00:49:22,759
Speaker 1: listen to every word I said. Ye, do everything I say.

1096
00:49:22,920 --> 00:49:25,879
Speaker 5: But yeah, that shit is super helpful. I'm like, we're

1097
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:28,360
Speaker 5: going dates once a week, like we try to do

1098
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:29,680
Speaker 5: it every Friday because.

1099
00:49:29,440 --> 00:49:30,919
Speaker 1: I'm like, I want you to. I want to feel

1100
00:49:30,960 --> 00:49:33,640
Speaker 1: like you're like my boyfriend, right, like act like you

1101
00:49:33,960 --> 00:49:35,520
Speaker 1: care that you have to keep me. Yeah.

1102
00:49:35,560 --> 00:49:37,840
Speaker 5: And then we dated other people when we separated, Like

1103
00:49:37,960 --> 00:49:39,960
Speaker 5: I lived in one space, he lived in another place.

1104
00:49:40,080 --> 00:49:42,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, we dated other people. And then I was just like,

1105
00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:43,799
Speaker 1: but you still not him?

1106
00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:45,840
Speaker 5: Yeah, you like, but you're still not her, right, And

1107
00:49:45,920 --> 00:49:47,360
Speaker 5: I was like, how did you know that, like we

1108
00:49:47,600 --> 00:49:49,799
Speaker 5: that you needed to like come back, And he was like, well,

1109
00:49:49,800 --> 00:49:52,040
Speaker 5: I mean like her jokes like ran out.

1110
00:49:53,840 --> 00:49:56,600
Speaker 1: Very funny. How How long were you guys separated? We

1111
00:49:56,680 --> 00:49:58,640
Speaker 1: were separated for fuck.

1112
00:49:58,680 --> 00:50:02,360
Speaker 5: We always took like stupid ass breaks, like breaks and

1113
00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 5: I'll be like, oh, it's my opportunity to like somebody now, right,

1114
00:50:07,440 --> 00:50:08,960
Speaker 5: But then I would just be like, you're born and

1115
00:50:09,040 --> 00:50:12,759
Speaker 5: you're not feeding me, like you're not challenging me I'm

1116
00:50:12,800 --> 00:50:13,520
Speaker 5: teaching you everything.

1117
00:50:13,600 --> 00:50:17,560
Speaker 1: Yeah I knowed somebody don't teach me some shit. That's

1118
00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:20,839
Speaker 1: what I feel. Yeah, so I would just be like, Gavin, ready,

1119
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:24,160
Speaker 1: are you ready to get to together? But yeah, girls,

1120
00:50:24,640 --> 00:50:26,719
Speaker 1: why you seem like a really healthy relationship like.

1121
00:50:26,960 --> 00:50:30,240
Speaker 5: Now yeah, now for sure, it's just like it feels

1122
00:50:30,280 --> 00:50:33,080
Speaker 5: like it's getting it feels like from when we first

1123
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:35,240
Speaker 5: started dating and we had Peace.

1124
00:50:35,560 --> 00:50:37,800
Speaker 1: I got pregnant with Peace six months of us dating.

1125
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:40,239
Speaker 1: Oh really, So that was the other thing. We didn't

1126
00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:41,000
Speaker 1: know each other.

1127
00:50:41,200 --> 00:50:43,560
Speaker 5: Oh, I didn't know each other through mutual friends. And

1128
00:50:43,560 --> 00:50:45,440
Speaker 5: then we got reconnected while I was on a date

1129
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:47,279
Speaker 5: with somebody completely and he was.

1130
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 1: Like slipping you his number. Then well he was just

1131
00:50:49,080 --> 00:50:50,960
Speaker 1: like I just opened this new store. You should come by.

1132
00:50:51,040 --> 00:50:53,200
Speaker 5: So I come by and then he was like oh

1133
00:50:53,239 --> 00:50:54,719
Speaker 5: and I'm gonna go to sushi, and I'm like I

1134
00:50:55,040 --> 00:50:56,759
Speaker 5: and this is a date. Yeah, And then I was like, yo,

1135
00:50:56,840 --> 00:50:59,799
Speaker 5: are really fuck with this guy? He's super cool. Then

1136
00:51:00,120 --> 00:51:02,080
Speaker 5: like two weeks later we started sucking and then.

1137
00:51:03,400 --> 00:51:05,040
Speaker 1: I got pregnant. Yeah, I'm like fuck it.

1138
00:51:05,560 --> 00:51:07,359
Speaker 5: But yeah, so that was either thing we didn't fully

1139
00:51:07,400 --> 00:51:09,719
Speaker 5: know each other. So it was just like did you

1140
00:51:09,840 --> 00:51:12,759
Speaker 5: question if you wanted to keep the baby. At first,

1141
00:51:12,800 --> 00:51:13,680
Speaker 5: I was very scared.

1142
00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:15,000
Speaker 6: I was just like, what do I do?

1143
00:51:15,440 --> 00:51:17,320
Speaker 1: Like, and he was just like, it'll be fine, everything

1144
00:51:17,360 --> 00:51:19,680
Speaker 1: will be cool. And I'm like, is it for you

1145
00:51:19,800 --> 00:51:22,839
Speaker 1: to say, yeah, I'm so I was pregnant.

1146
00:51:22,560 --> 00:51:24,040
Speaker 5: At twenty two, I had her at twenty three, and

1147
00:51:24,239 --> 00:51:26,799
Speaker 5: that's what it was. And I was like, I'm really young, right,

1148
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:28,640
Speaker 5: IM not saying that I'm like fifteen, but.

1149
00:51:28,719 --> 00:51:32,480
Speaker 1: I just felt like, yeah, I just lay high right right,

1150
00:51:33,960 --> 00:51:36,160
Speaker 1: be till twenty nine or something. Right, Hey, I'm just

1151
00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:38,560
Speaker 1: like I kind of wanted to like catch a up

1152
00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:44,000
Speaker 1: of my body, like genuine thoughts. Right, it's real, this

1153
00:51:44,239 --> 00:51:46,640
Speaker 1: is what I wanted to do. I think I was

1154
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:49,640
Speaker 1: sure that you were it for me. Yeah, maybe maybe not.

1155
00:51:49,719 --> 00:51:51,200
Speaker 1: Maybe you didn't feel that way, but that's you know,

1156
00:51:51,239 --> 00:51:53,040
Speaker 1: when you're that young, you than dating for six months,

1157
00:51:53,800 --> 00:51:56,360
Speaker 1: that the lust to strong strong make you feel like that.

1158
00:51:56,520 --> 00:51:57,719
Speaker 1: But and he felt the same way.

1159
00:51:57,800 --> 00:51:59,399
Speaker 5: He was just like, fuck, like, I know I want

1160
00:51:59,440 --> 00:52:02,839
Speaker 5: to be with you, like damn like early, but now

1161
00:52:02,960 --> 00:52:05,600
Speaker 5: I think where we're at, it's just kind of like

1162
00:52:05,960 --> 00:52:09,399
Speaker 5: I'm cool right here and we've been through so much,

1163
00:52:09,600 --> 00:52:12,279
Speaker 5: like his dad passing his grandfather past, like back to

1164
00:52:12,360 --> 00:52:13,400
Speaker 5: back months apart.

1165
00:52:13,600 --> 00:52:16,000
Speaker 1: You know, it's just like the baby and this and

1166
00:52:16,120 --> 00:52:18,279
Speaker 1: it's just like so much shit. You know, no one

1167
00:52:18,320 --> 00:52:21,040
Speaker 1: can compare it to those those experiences together. Like, dog,

1168
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:22,480
Speaker 1: I'm not starting the shit over.

1169
00:52:23,239 --> 00:52:23,799
Speaker 4: I don't want to go.

1170
00:52:25,360 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 1: That level bullshit.

1171
00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:29,000
Speaker 6: Do you think you guys like seeing other people for

1172
00:52:29,080 --> 00:52:31,279
Speaker 6: those periods like made it more difficult when you.

1173
00:52:31,280 --> 00:52:34,400
Speaker 1: Guys got back together. Oh, you know what's crazy?

1174
00:52:35,400 --> 00:52:38,359
Speaker 5: So the two people that I was like, I don't

1175
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 5: know if you say dating like going that is help

1176
00:52:41,160 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 5: me understand my worth, Like one of them would always

1177
00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:47,520
Speaker 5: compliment and you're so cute to be like I can

1178
00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:49,040
Speaker 5: do that with peace, Like I ain't talking right now,

1179
00:52:49,160 --> 00:52:51,320
Speaker 5: you mean it sounds like to tell her like this

1180
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:51,960
Speaker 5: is my moment.

1181
00:52:53,280 --> 00:52:57,520
Speaker 1: But one guy that I was dating always like acknowledgment

1182
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,279
Speaker 1: is very big for me just to be like, know what,

1183
00:53:00,440 --> 00:53:02,000
Speaker 1: like as a mom, you were holding it down.

1184
00:53:02,840 --> 00:53:05,239
Speaker 5: So when I was dating other people and these men

1185
00:53:05,560 --> 00:53:07,360
Speaker 5: that are my baby daddy are like, yo, you're a

1186
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,120
Speaker 5: dope mom, Like you're so cool.

1187
00:53:09,040 --> 00:53:14,320
Speaker 1: Like it's inspiring, you know, yeah, no it is. I

1188
00:53:14,400 --> 00:53:15,400
Speaker 1: mean I think I think you.

1189
00:53:15,440 --> 00:53:18,239
Speaker 4: Know what, it's funny that that didn't affect that didn't

1190
00:53:18,239 --> 00:53:20,759
Speaker 4: affect it in a negative way. So then Gavin must

1191
00:53:20,760 --> 00:53:22,239
Speaker 4: have stepped up and you must have brought that to

1192
00:53:22,320 --> 00:53:24,560
Speaker 4: his attention. That's what you needed, and then he provided

1193
00:53:24,600 --> 00:53:27,600
Speaker 4: that for you. I think that the other men that

1194
00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:30,479
Speaker 4: I that I was talking to help me understand my worth.

1195
00:53:30,719 --> 00:53:32,520
Speaker 4: I think I didn't really know it. And then another

1196
00:53:32,600 --> 00:53:35,480
Speaker 4: one would like just spoil me, like buy me shit

1197
00:53:35,560 --> 00:53:36,360
Speaker 4: all the time.

1198
00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:38,920
Speaker 1: And I'm like, yo, like I'm like riding of this right.

1199
00:53:39,040 --> 00:53:41,040
Speaker 5: And then I was like, you spoil me a lot,

1200
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,560
Speaker 5: but you still don't feed me spiritually. And the other one,

1201
00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:45,920
Speaker 5: I'm like, you don't spoil me enough, but you were

1202
00:53:46,000 --> 00:53:47,799
Speaker 5: like kind of there, but I'm kind of teaching you too,

1203
00:53:47,840 --> 00:53:49,880
Speaker 5: and I'm like, so, Gavin, what I need you to do?

1204
00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:53,359
Speaker 5: And then you just be yourself And then this mess

1205
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:54,919
Speaker 5: all together, well.

1206
00:53:54,880 --> 00:53:57,719
Speaker 1: That's amazing that he was able to hear you. And

1207
00:53:57,800 --> 00:53:59,560
Speaker 1: then I did not take offense to it because I

1208
00:53:59,560 --> 00:54:00,960
Speaker 1: don't know if when you told him you said.

1209
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:04,040
Speaker 2: This is.

1210
00:54:07,640 --> 00:54:08,160
Speaker 4: But it helped me.

1211
00:54:08,520 --> 00:54:10,720
Speaker 5: And then I was like, wait, it's okay to get spoiled,

1212
00:54:10,719 --> 00:54:12,680
Speaker 5: It's okay to like I'm worth.

1213
00:54:12,520 --> 00:54:13,480
Speaker 1: That I deserve that.

1214
00:54:13,840 --> 00:54:18,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, I started to realize that recently, like we subconsciously

1215
00:54:18,719 --> 00:54:22,319
Speaker 6: don't feel like we deserve certain things, and then we'll

1216
00:54:22,440 --> 00:54:24,880
Speaker 6: mess well block our blessings because even though you might

1217
00:54:25,000 --> 00:54:27,000
Speaker 6: say it like I'm a queen, you know what I'm saying,

1218
00:54:27,600 --> 00:54:29,879
Speaker 6: I'm a queen, treat me like a queen. But then

1219
00:54:30,200 --> 00:54:32,799
Speaker 6: like even with my baby's daddy, like I'm help him

1220
00:54:32,840 --> 00:54:37,800
Speaker 6: for my like fifteen years disrespectful a as a f

1221
00:54:38,040 --> 00:54:40,880
Speaker 6: like super disrespectful to the point where I'm like like

1222
00:54:41,080 --> 00:54:43,160
Speaker 6: numb to it, and I think even he thinks it's

1223
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:46,239
Speaker 6: like totally normal, but I had to start like step

1224
00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:47,880
Speaker 6: out of it to be like I don't deserve this

1225
00:54:48,000 --> 00:54:50,280
Speaker 6: ship like I'm a good woman, Like I'm a good person.

1226
00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:52,080
Speaker 6: This is not normal to talk to me like that,

1227
00:54:52,520 --> 00:54:55,040
Speaker 6: and you like addressing me this way on a regular

1228
00:54:55,120 --> 00:54:58,080
Speaker 6: basis is like mentally it starts to you start to

1229
00:54:58,120 --> 00:54:58,839
Speaker 6: believe that shit.

1230
00:54:59,280 --> 00:55:01,200
Speaker 1: So sometimes it say for like somebody.

1231
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:04,800
Speaker 6: An outsider to like to make you feel like it's worthy,

1232
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:05,920
Speaker 6: which sounds crazy.

1233
00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:08,840
Speaker 5: No, it's true though, Like it's well, I feel like

1234
00:55:09,600 --> 00:55:11,239
Speaker 5: that's what we're all here for too. It's like you

1235
00:55:11,320 --> 00:55:13,400
Speaker 5: have to remind when another like a girl you actually

1236
00:55:13,440 --> 00:55:14,040
Speaker 5: doing real good.

1237
00:55:14,120 --> 00:55:16,719
Speaker 1: I know, because Erica, when you send me that text, you.

1238
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:18,520
Speaker 6: Sent me a text this week, I had screenshots and

1239
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 6: text messages and you're like, I'm just so mad that

1240
00:55:21,080 --> 00:55:22,320
Speaker 6: he's talking to you like that and you're.

1241
00:55:22,160 --> 00:55:24,640
Speaker 1: Such an an amazing woman. And I was like it

1242
00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:26,440
Speaker 1: kind of like jerked me a little bit, and I

1243
00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:29,160
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, you are I know.

1244
00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:32,200
Speaker 6: But even like from friends, you know, as I think

1245
00:55:32,400 --> 00:55:35,480
Speaker 6: back to like the cultural thing, we are not affirming

1246
00:55:35,680 --> 00:55:36,680
Speaker 6: each other all the time.

1247
00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:38,960
Speaker 1: Because it's like what's understood? Does it need to be explained?

1248
00:55:39,360 --> 00:55:40,880
Speaker 6: And even I have to work on that with myself,

1249
00:55:41,040 --> 00:55:42,759
Speaker 6: like even in a relationship, I'm sure too, because I

1250
00:55:42,800 --> 00:55:44,640
Speaker 6: was like, I feel like I was so run down

1251
00:55:44,760 --> 00:55:47,520
Speaker 6: that I wasn't recognizing how much it affects how we

1252
00:55:47,600 --> 00:55:49,960
Speaker 6: communicate in general, because I wasn't used to getting like

1253
00:55:50,120 --> 00:55:53,440
Speaker 6: praised at any way. It's hard to, like for girlfriends

1254
00:55:53,600 --> 00:55:56,239
Speaker 6: or for family, for moms to like to remind each other.

1255
00:55:56,239 --> 00:56:00,840
Speaker 1: Like you're doing a good job. For sure, I know

1256
00:56:01,000 --> 00:56:03,400
Speaker 1: I love you. When you send me those text messages,

1257
00:56:03,480 --> 00:56:06,479
Speaker 1: I was like, what the fuck? I was, my girl,

1258
00:56:06,800 --> 00:56:07,680
Speaker 1: you know, it's.

1259
00:56:07,480 --> 00:56:09,680
Speaker 4: Too amazing to be putting up. You know that ship

1260
00:56:09,760 --> 00:56:11,439
Speaker 4: and you have to step outside of it. And really,

1261
00:56:11,560 --> 00:56:13,920
Speaker 4: I know that it's not normal. Yeah, it's not normal,

1262
00:56:13,960 --> 00:56:14,960
Speaker 4: and it's not okay, I know.

1263
00:56:15,040 --> 00:56:17,800
Speaker 6: I mean, I was like, I'm so emo sometimes, but

1264
00:56:17,880 --> 00:56:20,799
Speaker 6: I'm like, why am I feeling so like emotional by

1265
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:23,560
Speaker 6: my friend telling me this like text message you needed

1266
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:24,400
Speaker 6: to hear about.

1267
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:25,959
Speaker 1: That little reminder for sure.

1268
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:30,480
Speaker 4: And you know it's funny because I was telling her though,

1269
00:56:30,480 --> 00:56:32,719
Speaker 4: like I met, I met this, so I had this.

1270
00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:34,680
Speaker 4: I'm gonna fast forward the story because it's a wrong one.

1271
00:56:34,719 --> 00:56:38,160
Speaker 4: But this woman, I know kind of she had wrote

1272
00:56:38,200 --> 00:56:40,480
Speaker 4: written something on Facebook about her kid. I responded like,

1273
00:56:40,560 --> 00:56:42,560
Speaker 4: you know, affirming that yes, children are amazing. And then

1274
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:44,799
Speaker 4: she reached out to me privately and DM I was like, hey,

1275
00:56:45,560 --> 00:56:47,799
Speaker 4: I know you were going through something with your father

1276
00:56:47,880 --> 00:56:50,560
Speaker 4: of your child last year that was really traumatic for you.

1277
00:56:50,640 --> 00:56:53,200
Speaker 4: You handled it like a g I just want to say, like, God,

1278
00:56:53,280 --> 00:56:54,560
Speaker 4: bless you, blah blah blah. And I said, you know,

1279
00:56:54,719 --> 00:56:56,960
Speaker 4: thank you, and then she wrote me back. I was like, hey,

1280
00:56:57,040 --> 00:56:57,960
Speaker 4: I actually need to call you.

1281
00:56:58,080 --> 00:57:00,160
Speaker 1: I need to talk to you about some stuff. I

1282
00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:03,560
Speaker 1: was like, what you know, this person I do would

1283
00:57:03,600 --> 00:57:05,360
Speaker 1: not okay, not like one I've talked to her.

1284
00:57:05,360 --> 00:57:07,239
Speaker 4: I haven't seen her since I was pregnant, and like,

1285
00:57:07,360 --> 00:57:09,359
Speaker 4: we were never friends that chatted on the phone. Yeah,

1286
00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:12,120
Speaker 4: And so when I spoke to her, when I come

1287
00:57:12,160 --> 00:57:14,840
Speaker 4: to find out is that she's basically a clear voyant

1288
00:57:15,040 --> 00:57:17,160
Speaker 4: or she or she like spirits come to her and

1289
00:57:17,240 --> 00:57:19,000
Speaker 4: tell her what she needs, what needs to be said.

1290
00:57:19,000 --> 00:57:20,400
Speaker 4: And she said that when I reached out to her,

1291
00:57:20,400 --> 00:57:21,760
Speaker 4: it was the third time that she had gotten a

1292
00:57:21,800 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 4: sign that she needed to talk to me.

1293
00:57:23,520 --> 00:57:25,960
Speaker 1: She was hesitant to reach out because she didn't want

1294
00:57:26,000 --> 00:57:28,200
Speaker 1: me to think I was she was crazy.

1295
00:57:29,160 --> 00:57:29,560
Speaker 2: And she was.

1296
00:57:30,080 --> 00:57:30,600
Speaker 1: She was telling me.

1297
00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:32,040
Speaker 4: She was like, first of all, I just I just

1298
00:57:32,080 --> 00:57:33,440
Speaker 4: need to let you know that you're the father of

1299
00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:35,640
Speaker 4: your child. Is your soulmate, She's like, and this is

1300
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:38,280
Speaker 4: not me telling you, this is the spirits. I don't

1301
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:40,040
Speaker 4: know what she's talking about. The spirits are telling me

1302
00:57:40,280 --> 00:57:43,000
Speaker 4: he's your soulmate. And you know, you can go and

1303
00:57:43,120 --> 00:57:44,680
Speaker 4: date and do whatever you want to do and keep

1304
00:57:44,760 --> 00:57:46,640
Speaker 4: doing what you're gonna do. You're never gonna find this

1305
00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:50,880
Speaker 4: person again. And your daughter is this goal that she

1306
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:53,320
Speaker 4: was a boyant, just going in about basically how we're

1307
00:57:53,360 --> 00:57:55,440
Speaker 4: a trinity, how we're like all three of us were

1308
00:57:55,520 --> 00:57:57,200
Speaker 4: meant to be together at once. She's like, I don't

1309
00:57:57,240 --> 00:57:58,960
Speaker 4: have any connection to your or the father of your child.

1310
00:57:58,960 --> 00:58:00,800
Speaker 4: I don't know him, I don't care about him, so

1311
00:58:00,840 --> 00:58:02,240
Speaker 4: I don't want you to think like I'm over here,

1312
00:58:02,320 --> 00:58:04,000
Speaker 4: Team FG over here.

1313
00:58:04,040 --> 00:58:06,400
Speaker 1: And I'm like, okay. But I was telling her, I

1314
00:58:06,520 --> 00:58:08,640
Speaker 1: was like, you know, She's like, do you feel that

1315
00:58:08,720 --> 00:58:09,360
Speaker 1: he's your soulment?

1316
00:58:09,400 --> 00:58:11,280
Speaker 4: I said, well, I used to, but like, after all

1317
00:58:11,360 --> 00:58:13,240
Speaker 4: this shit that he put me through, I don't really

1318
00:58:13,320 --> 00:58:15,000
Speaker 4: know if I feel that way. And now that I've dated,

1319
00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:19,320
Speaker 4: I've found things that I didn't even realize were important

1320
00:58:19,320 --> 00:58:21,520
Speaker 4: to me that he wasn't providing for me, and other.

1321
00:58:21,520 --> 00:58:24,960
Speaker 1: Men, other men are feeding me in ways that he

1322
00:58:25,080 --> 00:58:25,880
Speaker 1: didn't and.

1323
00:58:25,960 --> 00:58:28,120
Speaker 4: I don't know if And now I realize those things

1324
00:58:28,760 --> 00:58:32,040
Speaker 4: are now deal breakers for me, whereas before they weren't

1325
00:58:32,040 --> 00:58:32,840
Speaker 4: even on my radar.

1326
00:58:34,000 --> 00:58:36,280
Speaker 1: And I don't know if he's capable of providing that

1327
00:58:36,360 --> 00:58:38,080
Speaker 1: for me. And I was like, so what am I

1328
00:58:38,120 --> 00:58:38,560
Speaker 1: supposed to do?

1329
00:58:38,640 --> 00:58:41,280
Speaker 4: Dumb myself down so that because I'm supposed to be

1330
00:58:41,320 --> 00:58:45,280
Speaker 4: with this, you're supposed to be myself And she was like, well, no,

1331
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:46,160
Speaker 4: he'll catch up.

1332
00:58:46,200 --> 00:58:49,600
Speaker 1: I'm like, how when where hum. She was very adamant

1333
00:58:49,640 --> 00:58:53,600
Speaker 1: and very convincing that he was going through that he

1334
00:58:53,720 --> 00:58:54,520
Speaker 1: will catch up.

1335
00:58:54,760 --> 00:58:56,320
Speaker 4: But I just feel like in the last six or

1336
00:58:56,320 --> 00:58:59,640
Speaker 4: seven months that I've been single, I have like progressed emotionally, spiritually,

1337
00:59:00,280 --> 00:59:02,200
Speaker 4: just in so many ways. I don't know if it's

1338
00:59:02,240 --> 00:59:04,600
Speaker 4: and he. I don't see any much change in him.

1339
00:59:04,680 --> 00:59:07,360
Speaker 4: There's little things I'm not in his everyday life. So

1340
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:11,440
Speaker 4: maybe I was speaking, you know, prematurely, but I just

1341
00:59:11,520 --> 00:59:14,320
Speaker 4: don't see him catching up. And I know as women,

1342
00:59:14,360 --> 00:59:19,160
Speaker 4: we're highly intelligent, we're emotionally advanced, and I just I

1343
00:59:19,240 --> 00:59:21,440
Speaker 4: don't know. I think we're always going to be a

1344
00:59:21,480 --> 00:59:25,360
Speaker 4: little bit farther ahead, and that's okay with me, but

1345
00:59:25,640 --> 00:59:27,400
Speaker 4: I would like to find a partner that at least

1346
00:59:27,480 --> 00:59:29,880
Speaker 4: is at least one step behind me, not like ten

1347
00:59:31,280 --> 00:59:34,440
Speaker 4: for real. And I know that he's not mature enough

1348
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:36,440
Speaker 4: for me to even if I ever wanted to get

1349
00:59:36,480 --> 00:59:38,680
Speaker 4: back with him, for me to tell him, hey, you know,

1350
00:59:38,760 --> 00:59:40,400
Speaker 4: these are the thing these are the things that happened

1351
00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:42,480
Speaker 4: to me while we were single that I really realized

1352
00:59:42,480 --> 00:59:42,880
Speaker 4: that I need.

1353
00:59:42,920 --> 00:59:47,040
Speaker 1: Can you provide these for me? His ego wouldn't.

1354
00:59:46,640 --> 00:59:49,120
Speaker 12: Allow it all him here is some other guys didn't want. Right,

1355
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:55,040
Speaker 12: his ego would be like, there you go, Erica. You

1356
00:59:55,080 --> 00:59:56,920
Speaker 12: always trying to be my mama. You always trying to

1357
00:59:56,960 --> 00:59:59,360
Speaker 12: tell me what to do, and that's that was always

1358
00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:01,160
Speaker 12: his thing. And I'm like, no, nigga, I just just

1359
01:00:01,680 --> 01:00:03,720
Speaker 12: got to deal with this. Is such an egotist?

1360
01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:05,560
Speaker 2: What is like this?

1361
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:07,960
Speaker 1: I'm just I'm never trying to be nobody's mama. I'm

1362
01:00:07,960 --> 01:00:11,439
Speaker 1: a mom, right, I don't want to be. I wish

1363
01:00:11,440 --> 01:00:12,880
Speaker 1: you would have done better because that's been I would

1364
01:00:12,920 --> 01:00:14,919
Speaker 1: have to give you this advice, right. I just want

1365
01:00:15,040 --> 01:00:17,680
Speaker 1: the best for us and you and me, and like

1366
01:00:18,040 --> 01:00:20,720
Speaker 1: your way isn't working, so like let's try it this way.

1367
01:00:20,880 --> 01:00:22,520
Speaker 6: And don't you know, like I know how I want

1368
01:00:22,560 --> 01:00:25,600
Speaker 6: to be treated well, I thought most like you, if

1369
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:28,920
Speaker 6: you want the relationship, you should care enough about what

1370
01:00:29,120 --> 01:00:32,360
Speaker 6: you know how I feel to to compromise or to

1371
01:00:32,520 --> 01:00:35,640
Speaker 6: want to provide some of the things that I need

1372
01:00:35,760 --> 01:00:37,120
Speaker 6: and want and vice versa.

1373
01:00:37,320 --> 01:00:39,360
Speaker 4: You know, but we never but a couple of therapy.

1374
01:00:39,360 --> 01:00:40,880
Speaker 4: It's funny mention because I always wanted to go to

1375
01:00:40,920 --> 01:00:42,720
Speaker 4: couples therapy. I always wanted him to go to therapy.

1376
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:43,040
Speaker 1: Period.

1377
01:00:43,200 --> 01:00:45,840
Speaker 4: You refuse to go to therapy by himself at all.

1378
01:00:46,840 --> 01:00:51,040
Speaker 4: Now that's changed, but I just find like it's it's

1379
01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:53,480
Speaker 4: and then I meet like white guys are like my therapist.

1380
01:00:53,560 --> 01:00:55,240
Speaker 4: I talk about it so openly and I'm like what.

1381
01:00:56,320 --> 01:00:58,400
Speaker 4: And that's why when you told me that Gavin goes

1382
01:00:58,440 --> 01:01:01,040
Speaker 4: to therapy and I'm like what mm hmm, Like wow,

1383
01:01:01,160 --> 01:01:03,000
Speaker 4: and you didn't, and you weren't the one that, like,

1384
01:01:03,560 --> 01:01:06,080
Speaker 4: you know, implied that maybe he should is even more

1385
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:06,720
Speaker 4: shocking to me.

1386
01:01:06,840 --> 01:01:08,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like, I don't. And I was the

1387
01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:10,800
Speaker 1: one that was like I don't want to talk too much, right,

1388
01:01:11,320 --> 01:01:13,560
Speaker 1: I don't know me. Yeah, I was definitely anything. You

1389
01:01:13,680 --> 01:01:16,080
Speaker 1: were like the stereotype mm hmm.

1390
01:01:16,600 --> 01:01:16,960
Speaker 2: He was like.

1391
01:01:17,320 --> 01:01:19,120
Speaker 1: And then once I started to go, I'm like, oh, okay,

1392
01:01:19,120 --> 01:01:19,920
Speaker 1: I see what's going on.

1393
01:01:20,480 --> 01:01:22,840
Speaker 6: I think you need you need a great therapist, like

1394
01:01:22,840 --> 01:01:24,840
Speaker 6: how you feel like connected, like you know, because every

1395
01:01:24,880 --> 01:01:25,760
Speaker 6: therapist is not going.

1396
01:01:25,720 --> 01:01:27,600
Speaker 1: To be like you can feel related, like you're gonna

1397
01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:29,160
Speaker 1: feel like relates to you. And see that was my

1398
01:01:29,280 --> 01:01:31,320
Speaker 1: thing is I was trying out different ones and I'm like, okay,

1399
01:01:31,320 --> 01:01:34,920
Speaker 1: I'm tired. I'm like, keep re explaining the story. Fucking therapy, right,

1400
01:01:35,280 --> 01:01:37,720
Speaker 1: they need to get all the backstory. Yeah, tell me

1401
01:01:37,760 --> 01:01:39,360
Speaker 1: about your family. I'm like, girl, you know how much

1402
01:01:39,360 --> 01:01:40,240
Speaker 1: money I speak telling?

1403
01:01:43,080 --> 01:01:45,480
Speaker 6: I wrote, I wrote it in an email right when

1404
01:01:45,480 --> 01:01:47,800
Speaker 6: I get there. You need to be briefed for real,

1405
01:01:47,920 --> 01:01:52,800
Speaker 6: because I'm not. But the therapist we have now, she's

1406
01:01:53,520 --> 01:01:55,520
Speaker 6: I like her. She's tight, like I feel like she

1407
01:01:55,680 --> 01:01:59,400
Speaker 6: has my back, but she's not biased, you know. I

1408
01:02:00,120 --> 01:02:04,400
Speaker 6: me and my bad went to couple's therapy. Total waste

1409
01:02:05,000 --> 01:02:06,240
Speaker 6: because I think you have to be you have to

1410
01:02:06,280 --> 01:02:09,840
Speaker 6: be like mature enough. You have to be mature enough

1411
01:02:09,920 --> 01:02:13,360
Speaker 6: to mature enough to.

1412
01:02:14,880 --> 01:02:15,920
Speaker 1: To to be honest.

1413
01:02:16,520 --> 01:02:18,560
Speaker 6: And if you're not ready to be honest about yourself,

1414
01:02:18,680 --> 01:02:20,080
Speaker 6: then it's never it doesn't work.

1415
01:02:20,240 --> 01:02:21,760
Speaker 1: So it was totally a waste of my time.

1416
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:24,920
Speaker 6: And like the one time that I went by myself,

1417
01:02:24,960 --> 01:02:26,600
Speaker 6: I was like, I really think he needs to be

1418
01:02:26,680 --> 01:02:27,400
Speaker 6: here by himself.

1419
01:02:30,960 --> 01:02:34,840
Speaker 1: Well, sorry, my child is getting cranky and it's getting

1420
01:02:34,880 --> 01:02:37,840
Speaker 1: hot as hell and this ny degrees.

1421
01:02:39,680 --> 01:02:45,160
Speaker 6: Yeah, we're roasting like oven chickens. Thank you so so

1422
01:02:45,400 --> 01:02:47,320
Speaker 6: much for coming and talking to us and just being

1423
01:02:47,360 --> 01:02:51,480
Speaker 6: cool as hell. Yes, you're like in real life, You've

1424
01:02:51,640 --> 01:02:54,880
Speaker 6: really helped me a lot consider some things. And I'm

1425
01:02:54,920 --> 01:02:58,880
Speaker 6: going through a holistic doctor the next available appointment.

1426
01:03:00,120 --> 01:03:03,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you guys definitely check out Felicia's Instagram because

1427
01:03:03,160 --> 01:03:06,000
Speaker 4: you will get daily gems. Her instant stories be poppen

1428
01:03:06,240 --> 01:03:10,320
Speaker 4: with all types of information and just you know, it's

1429
01:03:10,400 --> 01:03:12,160
Speaker 4: just like you're just so inspiring.

1430
01:03:12,440 --> 01:03:15,520
Speaker 1: Yes, you really are. Listen. When I listen, I'm like, Yeah,

1431
01:03:16,040 --> 01:03:18,280
Speaker 1: and her baby piece, which I love. That name, by

1432
01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:22,960
Speaker 1: the way, is like the cool one. I think. Yeah,

1433
01:03:23,080 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 1: I think maybe I am crazy. When I say it

1434
01:03:25,360 --> 01:03:26,800
Speaker 1: in your I was like, oh my god, they're so

1435
01:03:26,960 --> 01:03:30,480
Speaker 1: cool that that baby shitter is so cool. That name

1436
01:03:30,600 --> 01:03:35,600
Speaker 1: is so cool. They're cool. I know y'all are cool.

1437
01:03:35,800 --> 01:03:39,360
Speaker 4: Y'all coolest shit, the cutest, coolest couple ever, make the coolest,

1438
01:03:39,400 --> 01:03:40,600
Speaker 4: cutest baby follow.

1439
01:03:42,320 --> 01:03:47,680
Speaker 1: Oh we're here every saying Happy Mother's Day. Mothers out there.

1440
01:03:48,000 --> 01:03:50,720
Speaker 6: This is a gem to remind you to continue to

1441
01:03:50,920 --> 01:03:53,040
Speaker 6: be yourself and hang on to whatever makes you feel

1442
01:03:53,120 --> 01:03:56,080
Speaker 6: normal and great and wonderful, and don't let anybody's opinion

1443
01:03:57,520 --> 01:03:59,040
Speaker 6: to cheer you from which the fuck you want to

1444
01:03:59,080 --> 01:03:59,800
Speaker 6: do and if you're.

1445
01:03:59,640 --> 01:04:03,400
Speaker 1: Happy, that's why I'm I know you're worth And don't

1446
01:04:03,520 --> 01:04:06,560
Speaker 1: don't sell for no bullshit, no settle for no bullshit.

1447
01:04:06,520 --> 01:04:08,600
Speaker 4: Cause you know what, parenting is hard enough. The last

1448
01:04:08,600 --> 01:04:12,120
Speaker 4: thing you need is some extra shit that's unnecessary. So

1449
01:04:12,280 --> 01:04:15,000
Speaker 4: cut it, cut it, and it's gonna be my outro song.

1450
01:04:15,960 --> 01:04:20,880
Speaker 1: Got it, get it next hump bay. Alright, you guys,

1451
01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:24,000
Speaker 1: We'll see you guys next time. Bye bye.

1452
01:04:24,680 --> 01:04:27,560
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, we did not forget about our beauty blender

1453
01:04:27,640 --> 01:04:32,120
Speaker 4: giveaway winners. We did a giveaway on our Instagram and

1454
01:04:32,560 --> 01:04:36,720
Speaker 4: we are choosing five winners, but actually I think.

1455
01:04:36,640 --> 01:04:39,440
Speaker 1: We're gonna choose six cause it was so hard to decide.

1456
01:04:39,280 --> 01:04:42,240
Speaker 4: I know, and you guys were so amazing. The response

1457
01:04:42,280 --> 01:04:43,880
Speaker 4: that we got was so amazing, so we give it

1458
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:44,560
Speaker 4: away six.

1459
01:04:45,040 --> 01:04:47,520
Speaker 1: Hey, you get a beauty blender. You get a beauty blender,

1460
01:04:47,800 --> 01:04:49,800
Speaker 1: and you I feel like the Oprah of beauty blender,

1461
01:04:51,320 --> 01:04:55,000
Speaker 1: which is basically equivalent to a car. You know, it's close.

1462
01:04:56,760 --> 01:05:05,200
Speaker 1: So the first winner v glam Mommy aka Steph. Hey girl, Hey,

1463
01:05:05,680 --> 01:05:09,000
Speaker 1: the Glam Mommy aka Steph. You have won a BBF

1464
01:05:09,080 --> 01:05:14,040
Speaker 1: Beauty Blender Kit number two at Polly Pocket ninety three.

1465
01:05:14,800 --> 01:05:17,440
Speaker 1: Hey girl, we see you, and you get a beauty

1466
01:05:17,480 --> 01:05:25,120
Speaker 1: blender too, a kit number three at Zahara. Yeah, you

1467
01:05:25,200 --> 01:05:29,640
Speaker 1: get one too. And then number four we.

1468
01:05:29,800 --> 01:05:36,280
Speaker 11: Have at Mo Fuego Hot Mo Underscore Fuego and also

1469
01:05:37,760 --> 01:05:41,200
Speaker 11: at the Life of Ash Underscore you get a beauty

1470
01:05:41,240 --> 01:05:43,400
Speaker 11: blender and our bonus round.

1471
01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:48,960
Speaker 4: Last, but not least, at Tracy Underscore A. At Tracy

1472
01:05:49,120 --> 01:05:54,440
Speaker 4: Underscore A. So if we have announced you on today's episode,

1473
01:05:54,720 --> 01:05:57,440
Speaker 4: dm us, let us know you know you won and

1474
01:05:57,720 --> 01:06:00,840
Speaker 4: send us your address and we will send over those

1475
01:06:01,120 --> 01:06:02,200
Speaker 4: beauty blend.

1476
01:06:03,280 --> 01:06:05,040
Speaker 1: Happy motherfucking Mother's Day.

1477
01:06:05,200 --> 01:06:10,200
Speaker 6: Mother's Day, you don't hesitate to have a cocktail and

1478
01:06:10,320 --> 01:06:11,400
Speaker 6: do all the ship you want to do.

1479
01:06:11,440 --> 01:06:14,160
Speaker 1: Today it's yours, not today, Sunday, a week, a week,

1480
01:06:14,160 --> 01:06:16,600
Speaker 1: it's all. It's our fucking day. It's all. It's our week.

1481
01:06:16,800 --> 01:06:19,800
Speaker 1: Every day is Mother's Day. Every day. All right, y'all,

1482
01:06:20,600 --> 01:06:22,720
Speaker 1: don't forget to d MS your address. This is important.

1483
01:06:23,800 --> 01:06:27,240
Speaker 4: Bye, yeah.

1484
01:06:29,600 --> 01:06:40,040
Speaker 2: Yeah. Cut it, cut it, cut it, cut it, cut it,

1485
01:06:40,680 --> 01:06:45,080
Speaker 2: cut it, cut it, cut it, dimp bridges. Wait your hat.

1486
01:06:45,160 --> 01:06:48,760
Speaker 2: You need to cut it. Cut it your way your hat.

1487
01:06:48,840 --> 01:06:49,840
Speaker 1: You need to cut it.

1488
01:06:50,840 --> 01:06:54,840
Speaker 2: Cut it, cut it, cut it, cut it, cut it,

1489
01:06:55,440 --> 01:06:59,840
Speaker 2: cut it, cut it, cut it. Dim is way too hair.

1490
01:06:59,880 --> 01:07:03,520
Speaker 2: You need to cut it. Your prices way too high.

1491
01:07:03,600 --> 01:07:04,640
Speaker 1: You need to cut it.

1492
01:07:05,600 --> 01:07:08,120
Speaker 2: Running through backs on the record, Cash hitting my plug

1493
01:07:08,200 --> 01:07:10,040
Speaker 2: on the cellie. Somebody expect that.

1494
01:07:10,080 --> 01:07:10,920
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, my man.

1495
01:07:11,080 --> 01:07:13,360
Speaker 3: I'm gonna skate it off in the roars key thirty

1496
01:07:13,400 --> 01:07:15,560
Speaker 3: six on my side, I'm gonna got me