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Speaker 1: Oh my god, the fifteen minute morning show podcast from

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Speaker 1: Santa Fe, New Mexico. That was the loudest woo I've

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Speaker 1: ever heard. That was the woo of Lisa Lampanelli. Know

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Speaker 1: what it was. It was the fake woo of excitement,

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Speaker 1: because I legitimately am excited. The rest of them are like,

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Speaker 1: when is this fifteen minutes done? Shot me? I'm It's true.

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Speaker 1: I'm a friend. I'm here for you. We do it

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Speaker 1: every day. I don't let me. You know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: All of you shut up and I'll talk to great.

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Speaker 1: But I just want to say, Greg, now, can you

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Speaker 1: just like really famous? What do you want to say?

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Speaker 1: What I really want to say? We saw them through

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Speaker 1: the whole morning show with his disgusting ween hanging out. Well, yeah,

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Speaker 1: we saw him naked, and I said, now that you

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Speaker 1: guys close on, he's not as disgusting. I like a

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Speaker 1: nice guy with clothes on. So you were heinous without

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Speaker 1: Now you're a little less fat and not as you

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Speaker 1: hear that you go with t yet not as disgusting.

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Speaker 1: I think that's not I ton't leave it that he

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Speaker 1: had Libo's touch in this year. Bat. I don't think

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Speaker 1: your u gand I totally understand where it's coming from.

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Speaker 1: I have said before, I said I think I look

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Speaker 1: better with clothes on, and it's just freabody looks better

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Speaker 1: with clothes on. That's why even in the porns, the

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Speaker 1: women wear a little of this and a little of that.

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Speaker 1: Stop with the naked everybody especially, I think some people

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Speaker 1: look better naked. I'm not one of them. I love

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Speaker 1: looking at Alex naked. I like looking at my naked Alex,

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Speaker 1: and he's freaking hot. But if you're a great you

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Speaker 1: gotta put it on. By the way I say so,

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Speaker 1: here it is, as you listen to the fifteen Minute

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Speaker 1: Morning Show podcast. We're in my house in Santa Fe.

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Speaker 1: I woke up this morning at two o'clock and twenty

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Speaker 1: five people boom, And can you imagine people coming into

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Speaker 1: your house to do a morning show. Here, we've been drinking,

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Speaker 1: we've been eating egos, we've been having a great morning.

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Speaker 1: I sent in your pantry and I had two tapes cookies.

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Speaker 1: So here at the fifteen Minute Morning Show table, there's Danielle,

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Speaker 1: there's Garrett, there's a Gandhi, there's great Teath Lisaelli. Of

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Speaker 1: course Daniel DeLillo come on How you doing and how

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Speaker 1: are you doing? How you are you doing? Me? Tell

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Speaker 1: you about this broad This is Lisa Lampanelli speaking the

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Speaker 1: famous one on the show. Danielle says she was on

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Speaker 1: my flight. I was, and I said, let me hide

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Speaker 1: from this bitch. Once I saw that I hearn't radio

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Speaker 1: had and she was sitting in the loser section. I

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Speaker 1: loved right fast around the way to the Actually I

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Speaker 1: was in two deep. Yeah, you know why because you

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Speaker 1: didn't buy two seats. You have to buy two seats. Yah,

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Speaker 1: that's the thing. One blue Jet Blue, you can we

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Speaker 1: buy whole row. You can buy a whole row on

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Speaker 1: Jet Blue. Joan Jet. Somebody once said to me, Joan

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Speaker 1: Jet buys a whole row, and I said, well, I

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Speaker 1: should be able to do that. She's I'm less of

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Speaker 1: a husband than she was at the time by this,

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Speaker 1: and my dog was very com You you're squished with

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Speaker 1: people who possibly smell. Oh, this lady next to me

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Speaker 1: was heat was going into my face. So why don't

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Speaker 1: you stop acting like you're poor and operating out of

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Speaker 1: scarcity and decide that you want to enter into the

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Speaker 1: adult phase of your life, Penny and buy two seats

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Speaker 1: go explain why you hate Lisa. This is why people

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Speaker 1: lovely safe coach. I'm trying to help you to be Lisa.

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Speaker 1: Lampanella used to be the queen of me. Now she's

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Speaker 1: the queen of meaning. But I yelled she for sure

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Speaker 1: because here's what I decided. I may be a life

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Speaker 1: coach with a certification, but I don't have to be

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Speaker 1: nice about it. I see you. You need to buy

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Speaker 1: the two seats out of self love. Will you promise

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Speaker 1: me this? Say yes, yes, shut up. Also, Scary Jones

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Speaker 1: is here at I'm having so much fun. I just

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Speaker 1: feel like it's just a bunch of friends around the

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Speaker 1: table talking. I got my no shoes on, and I'm

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Speaker 1: a third cup of coffee. This is great. He was

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Speaker 1: kind of weird. I gotta be honest. At Danielle and Gandhi, everybody.

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Speaker 1: Did you notice Greg te rolled into Alex's bead while

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Speaker 1: he was sleeping my fiance and kind of made out

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Speaker 1: with him. He started pumping him with his baron. They

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Speaker 1: were all naked and it got a little crazy, to

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Speaker 1: the point where Alex had to kind of push him off.

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Speaker 1: You saw Greggy. I feel Gregg would have sex with

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Speaker 1: a parking meter if there was time left on it,

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Speaker 1: he would drum a hole in a ham and do it.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, juice that dot Kosher say, I love your

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Speaker 1: desperation for attention and fame, and I said, go with it.

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Speaker 1: Work for me, it could work for you. Is hardcore

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Speaker 1: bond Honestly, Alex and I bonded with the same birthday.

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Speaker 1: We weld share the same love for the same man.

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Speaker 1: I mean, we just did you touch my fiance's wer didn't,

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Speaker 1: but I asked him. I said, dude, will you, you you know,

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Speaker 1: grab my and he goes, I can't do that. I

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Speaker 1: go why and he goes because I'm getting married, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, a big deal. It's me. Gregg's not a

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Speaker 1: big deal, okay. So to assume if he wasn't getting married,

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Speaker 1: do you think you would have grabbed it? I don't

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Speaker 1: think Dave Brodie has come. I messed broody. Welcome to

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Speaker 1: the podcast, A fifteen minute morning show. I just grabbed

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Speaker 1: Alex's junk. Everyone's getting it but me, So Elvis, with

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Speaker 1: Gregg ty being naked in your bed, he was naked

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Speaker 1: on your side, that's okay. Have you seen the pictures

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Speaker 1: of what he did to your pool table. Yet, what

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Speaker 1: did you let's just say this. Let's just say this now,

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Speaker 1: two more balls on the table. Oh my god. Everything

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Speaker 1: he didn't know about the pool table. We find out

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Speaker 1: this is now looking at the pool table. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: we we have an announcement. So there is a guest

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Speaker 1: bedroom that someone went to pooh in in the bathroom,

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Speaker 1: someone mud flapped all over the toilet and Gandhi found

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Speaker 1: it and someone's ass. But it's kind of weird. It's

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Speaker 1: like they had pooh above the crack, right, No, I

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Speaker 1: know how that happens. It goes like that is one

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Speaker 1: of those Now it was like they have like it

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Speaker 1: was up here and then they sat. Yeah, exactly, It's

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Speaker 1: like they wiped and they wiped by theory is who

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Speaker 1: it was said, I'm just speaking from experience. Who deflects

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Speaker 1: their own problems on to others. Gandhi did it, and

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Speaker 1: that's the way to deflect from people thinking it's you.

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Speaker 1: So and I did have done it. I would have

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Speaker 1: cleaned it up, and I still would have blame someone

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Speaker 1: else for it. But I watched in the bathroom stot

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Speaker 1: and I was like, no, Danielle walked back out. I

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Speaker 1: know we have a rule. We've known each other for years.

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Speaker 1: Always leave a clean ball as before you leave. I

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Speaker 1: just want to know who the savage was? Who did that?

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Speaker 1: And then I like, how did you wipe? What was

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Speaker 1: going on? And then you left it? You didn't turn

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Speaker 1: around and look at the toilet, You left your mud?

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Speaker 1: Who was it has to be some uncomfortable enough to

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Speaker 1: go in the bedroom. I've never been here before. I'm

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Speaker 1: not going in the bedroom. One accused you. I'm saying,

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Speaker 1: I'm saying my type of person. Somebody's comfortable enough to

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Speaker 1: go in the bedroom. I'm breaking it's this guy, scary, scary.

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Speaker 1: You left your your poo print all my toilet, like

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Speaker 1: like I flushed before. So this way you get the

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Speaker 1: water coat and this way whatever goes into it. This

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Speaker 1: was on this seat. Even what happened did it? They

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Speaker 1: didn't shower, and they like what I'm right? I wish

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Speaker 1: we would have taken a DNA swab and then cleaned it.

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Speaker 1: I know there's been a lot of eyes going my way.

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Speaker 1: I swear to you, I did not know you were clean,

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Speaker 1: but was clean you were in the pool. And also

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Speaker 1: he's admitted to a lot of grotesqueness. I think he would.

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Speaker 1: Just can I tell you something about great? Not only

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Speaker 1: has he done it once, he has shipped on our

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Speaker 1: control room floor twice. Why did you do that for

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Speaker 1: the show? Exactly? You know, he was pushing it. He

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Speaker 1: was pushing and it came out. But here's what happened.

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Speaker 1: Scary was standing behind him. So the first time was

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Speaker 1: an accident. But when Lisa, when he realized he was

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Speaker 1: pulling on Scary, he did it on purpose. He gave

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Speaker 1: it an extra put. Yes, well in his defense, looking, okay,

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Speaker 1: let's clean it up a little bit here. Here we

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Speaker 1: are in Santa Fe. And by the way, the food

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Speaker 1: is very spicy, so there's gonna be a lot of

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Speaker 1: mud flapping going on. And that's okay. I love the

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Speaker 1: food here, but I love the fact that I can

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Speaker 1: share my favorite town with my favorite people. Can you

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Speaker 1: share some of your wedding menu with us? I'm not

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Speaker 1: share I don't even don't even I don't even know

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Speaker 1: what's wedding. I would love if you had a white

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Speaker 1: trash type of menu, because you know, like pigs in

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Speaker 1: a blank, Yeah, things like that, because you know you

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Speaker 1: you you you gays, you're very classy. It has to

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Speaker 1: be a filet of a French kind of gay thing.

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Speaker 1: I don't like all that. I'm not fancy, so I

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Speaker 1: want to leave something junkie there. Here's gonna be some

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Speaker 1: junky stuff. Okay, good because you're not classy, Elvis. I

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Speaker 1: think you pretend to be classy with your twenty three houses,

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Speaker 1: but I think there's actually a nice basic guy in you.

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Speaker 1: There is a basic guy. I mean god, I would

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Speaker 1: do anything for a basic guy in me right now.

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Speaker 1: So I will tell you that what Froggy is joining

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Speaker 1: in the podcast. Froggy, I'm telling you right now, you're

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Speaker 1: gonna have a lot of surprises at the wedding. We

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Speaker 1: have some stuff going on that you guys don't even

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Speaker 1: know about. I have a surprise for you. What Nate

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Speaker 1: and I just ate all of your tapes cookies out

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Speaker 1: of the pantry. That's okay. You know I love Tates.

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Speaker 1: We get them afraid they're a sponsor. I have a

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Speaker 1: problem with your pantry because I was in there also

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Speaker 1: and I put it up on Instagram. You've got a

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Speaker 1: giant bottle of Hynes ketchup. Nothing wrong with that, it's

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Speaker 1: my favorite. But you've got two bottles of Bootleg catchup

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Speaker 1: in there, and you're not a man that needs to

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Speaker 1: cut corners. Well, I think maybe guests put those in

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Speaker 1: there there, like trainer to bring your own catchup party.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Road is kind of weird about catchup.

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Speaker 1: If it's not Hines, he's I have a friend like that?

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Speaker 1: Is that way about mayonnaise? They say only hellman's only helmets.

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Speaker 1: I said, shut up and slather that on your dick.

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Speaker 1: That's what I say. Right, it's a podcast. Daniel hates

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Speaker 1: mayonnaise and watching about Watch this, Watch this, think about

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Speaker 1: eating a spoonful of mayonnaise, Daniel, watch no, don't think

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Speaker 1: about it any stop thinking about Please don't tell up

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Speaker 1: in Santa fe not on the table. This is a

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Speaker 1: nice table traumatized by man. If you talk about holy crap,

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Speaker 1: stop thinking you have powers. Disgusting. Okay, so Lisa say

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Speaker 1: the same thing to me, I think, say Lisa. Let's

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Speaker 1: go say Lisa. Lisa visualized visualize the following sucking Dick's

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Speaker 1: exactly how I feel. I have a celebrity, shouldn't have

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Speaker 1: to don't you feel that way? No? No, I think

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Speaker 1: he likes to do that. I'm not a celebrity. Lisa, Lisa, Lisa.

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Speaker 1: To be totally frank, we are radio people, radio people

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Speaker 1: other than Howard. We're not celebrities. Were just what do

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Speaker 1: I always say? All this? What's that? We are a

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Speaker 1: click above a car any worker, but hand radio guys

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Speaker 1: got nothing on you guys where I got So anyway,

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Speaker 1: I just wanted to share this morning with you, Lisa,

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Speaker 1: because this is this is my family, and I have

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Speaker 1: the best family in the world, and I can't imagine

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Speaker 1: being anywhere else doing anything else other than this right

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Speaker 1: now here today. What's beautiful about that is you know

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Speaker 1: you have no other talent, so it's really good you

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Speaker 1: had no choice but to be one step above a Carney. No,

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Speaker 1: but this is nice that you even said, hey, come

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Speaker 1: on over. Because I had of the goodness of my heart,

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Speaker 1: I texted him, I said I know him during my wedding.

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Speaker 1: I was very overwhelmed, so I texted I said, hey,

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Speaker 1: I got a car. If you need anything picked up,

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Speaker 1: I'll be here Thursday on he goes come over her.

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Speaker 1: Boy was I flattered? And then I said, damn, I'm

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Speaker 1: sorry I asked because now I have to do stuff.

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Speaker 1: But if you need anything, don't ask me. Seriously. I'm seriously.

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Speaker 1: I was happy to be a clue. Thank you for

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Speaker 1: making me feel at home. So you've never been a

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Speaker 1: center before. Never. I can't wait to experience the magical delights.

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Speaker 1: I'm getting a massage, and I'm going to a casino,

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Speaker 1: and I'm going to your wedding. Sounds like a full weekend.

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Speaker 1: My god, that's like an entire eternity. That's a season

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Speaker 1: of stuff about the five and dime and the freedom.

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Speaker 1: Go to the five and dime on the plosets. There's

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Speaker 1: a five and time. You can get a freed pie,

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Speaker 1: freedo pie which will which will flush right out of

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Speaker 1: your butt. Excellent immediately if you want to flush and

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Speaker 1: then it kind of come over here and use the

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Speaker 1: guest bathroom. No great, I'll feel right, it's already been done.

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Speaker 1: The suggestions for Lisa, for Santa Fe, anyone. I think

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Speaker 1: I got stuff to do, like, it's really great. Guess

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Speaker 1: what else is pretty? Seeing a picture of it you

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Speaker 1: take and you send to me. I don't like to

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Speaker 1: do things like I don't have to physically exert myself.

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Speaker 1: I'm physically and emotionally perfect. I don't need to do anything.

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Speaker 1: I like that all right, all right, what's the plaza?

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Speaker 1: Is that? Like the main plot is the very center

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Speaker 1: of Santa Fe. It's beautiful to my crystals though, because

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Speaker 1: I don't like there's crystals there. Yes, Lisa famous comedian,

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Speaker 1: know that you got the invite after a and we're canceled.

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Speaker 1: I figured, damn that. And he's not even talking about

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Speaker 1: to the show. He's talking about to the wedding. I

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Speaker 1: knew mine arrived late. By the way, did you have

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Speaker 1: like I had a B and C list for the wedding,

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Speaker 1: because I definitely did, clearly didn't. Yeah, obviously I know

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Speaker 1: I was on your be not at all. No, you

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Speaker 1: are at the fun table. Yeah, so I'm with a

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Speaker 1: bunch of gaze and girl it's the fun and gay table,

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Speaker 1: not fun gaye okay, funny and so who's fun? Will you?

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Speaker 1: First of all? No, wait, this is the table. If

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Speaker 1: I could like drop out of my wedding and said

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Speaker 1: at the table, it probably probably be that table. Oh

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Speaker 1: that's good. I liked hearing that. Which one is brody

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Speaker 1: at the careerless douche table. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Dave's

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Speaker 1: written me some of my best material over the years,

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Speaker 1: so I must Okay, So what table? What table would

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Speaker 1: Danielle dan are you at? Which table would you if

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Speaker 1: if Roadie's at the careerless douchebag table, what table would

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Speaker 1: Danielle be hosting? Pretty girls whose hair sometimes is nailing it? Okay?

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Speaker 1: So if if Gandy hosted a table, what she's doing?

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Speaker 1: What table would her table be? Creepy unidentifiable minorities? Oh

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Speaker 1: my god? Okay, what about Froggy? What about Froggy? Froggy's

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Speaker 1: table would be Oh god, guys who were like under

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Speaker 1: armour as actual clothing, alright, dressed, get dressed about scary, scary,

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Speaker 1: every disability on the planet. He looks, he looks almost

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Speaker 1: like it's a little bit of a disability. By the way,

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Speaker 1: no offense disabled people if you've seen them. What about

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Speaker 1: straight nates? Straight straight everyone who wanted to always have

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Speaker 1: sex with Elvis but never got the chang said, I

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Speaker 1: have a wonderful day. Happy wedding. Wedd