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Speaker 1: Out of everybody in this room, who would be the

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Speaker 1: worst HR person.

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Speaker 2: I'm just gonna say it, Jo.

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Speaker 3: I didn't want to be selfish, but I was going

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Speaker 3: to say no offense to that.

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Speaker 1: But that's why we had him pose as an HR rep.

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Speaker 1: And today he calls an office worker who's been nervous

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Speaker 1: about layoffs. We want him to know he is fine,

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Speaker 1: his job is safe. It's just corporate is making some

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Speaker 1: changes that are quote in the best interest of the company. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm sure he'll understand. In your phone tap right.

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Speaker 3: Now working Jeffrey's phone tap on the twenties. Hello, good morning.

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Speaker 3: Hi is this Phil?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? This is Phil. Who am I speaking to?

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Speaker 3: Hey Phil? My name's Heywood Jabebloni. I work in human resources.

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Speaker 3: How are you doing today?

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Speaker 2: I'm fine? Thanks?

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Speaker 3: Oh just fine? Huh. I was hoping you were going

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Speaker 3: to be in a better mood than just fine before

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Speaker 3: I told you this news.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm in a good mood.

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Speaker 3: What do you want to tell me?

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Speaker 2: Why are you calling?

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Speaker 3: Well, you probably heard that we're reducing our workforce, right

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Speaker 3: Oh oh my god, No, no, no, listen, before you get

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Speaker 3: ahead of yourself, You're not getting laid off or anyone

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Speaker 3: in your division. All your jobs are safe. Okay, take

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Speaker 3: a deep breath. Okay, I'm kind of worried for seconds there.

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Speaker 2: Oh, sorry about that. No, you're you're fine.

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Speaker 3: We're just taking all your vacation days away.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: You typically have around what twenty twenty vacation days?

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Speaker 2: I see here?

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Speaker 3: Right? Yeah, by Friday, you'll have zero.

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Speaker 2: How does that make any sense?

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Speaker 3: Well, I mean you would agree this is a tough

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Speaker 3: time for the company.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well sure, I understand those.

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Speaker 3: Well, if you're saying that, think about hard it is

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Speaker 3: for the people above you getting paid way way, way more.

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Speaker 2: Those guys are stressed.

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Speaker 3: I'm the ones who's stressed, like pycheck to paycheck. Well, sure,

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Speaker 3: I mean it's it's tough for everybody right now, but

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Speaker 3: especially for the guys at the top.

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Speaker 2: What are you talking about?

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Speaker 3: With so much uncertainty, they can't even golf more than

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Speaker 3: twice a week.

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Speaker 2: Think about it.

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Speaker 3: That's why recently they all met and said, hey, how

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Speaker 3: can we help this company and take a tax free

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Speaker 3: vacation to the Bahamas.

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Speaker 2: What a vacation?

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Speaker 3: Oh sorry, a tax free vacation to the Bahamas? Back

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Speaker 3: free vacation for them?

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Speaker 2: I know, right, it's it's a tricky thing to do,

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Speaker 2: and so this is why they got creative.

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Speaker 3: The accountant said, it has to be on the company dime.

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Speaker 3: So if you take all the employees vacation days away,

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Speaker 3: we can legally ride it off, the whole thing, including

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Speaker 3: the alcohol joke, right, I mean it sounds like some

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Speaker 3: kind of freaking joke.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, it's not.

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Speaker 3: Hey, we appreciate your sacrifice. Don't think that you're going unappreciated.

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Speaker 2: Friends. I'm not sacrificing anything. You took it away from me.

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Speaker 2: Well I didn't give it again.

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Speaker 3: We appreciate and understand everything you've done. No, that's why,

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Speaker 3: as a token of the company's gratitude, you and everyone

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Speaker 3: in your division will receive four small chocolates in a

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Speaker 3: plastic box. How does that help. It's not going to

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Speaker 3: be available to Christmas because that's what we get the discount. Oh,

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Speaker 3: it's unbelievable.

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Speaker 2: I knew you'd be excited. What's wrong with you for chocolates?

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Speaker 3: Small chocolates. I have to I don't want you to

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Speaker 3: think they're like bars.

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Speaker 2: They're just like bite sized chocolates.

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Speaker 3: Befit is not right. I cannot lose my vacation days

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Speaker 3: because corporate wants to get hammered in the Bahamas and

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Speaker 3: get four lousy chocolates. That is one part I didn't

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Speaker 3: tell you. It's not just the Bahamas.

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Speaker 2: We're also going to the Virgin Islands.

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Speaker 3: So wait a minute, why are you saying, Lee, you're

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Speaker 3: not going on the trip you're in human resource. Oh yeah, I.

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Speaker 2: Didn't mention that part. They're bringing HR. I have never

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Speaker 2: been outside the country. I couldn't be more excited.

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Speaker 3: But they're just gonna leave us here with nothing.

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Speaker 2: And lost days.

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Speaker 3: And don't be thinking you can use your sick days

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Speaker 3: to get time off.

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Speaker 2: We put a temporary freeze on that.

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Speaker 3: Now you need to email us if you think you're

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Speaker 3: gonna be sick at least a month in advance.

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Speaker 2: I know what I'm gonna get.

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Speaker 3: I won't be checking my email though I'll be in

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Speaker 3: the Bahamas or the Virgin Islands.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. Personally, I agree, I would.

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Speaker 3: Blame this on Keisha.

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Speaker 2: She's the one who set you up for all of this.

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Speaker 1: Pha.

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Speaker 3: Why the ain't see going on that trip too without Mayne?

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Speaker 3: She'd definitely like to, but she decided to do a

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Speaker 3: prank phone call on you instead, which I appreciate.

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Speaker 2: What are you talking about.

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Speaker 3: Idiots, because this is actually Jose for the raidershow Brook

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Speaker 3: and Jeffrey morning, we're doing a phone.

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Speaker 2: Tap on you man.

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Speaker 3: No way, Yes, he just said there's been a lot

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Speaker 3: of tension in the office lately because of layoff, so

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Speaker 3: she wanted to light in the mood.

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Speaker 2: I cannot believe he did this. Hilarious neither. Oh, you

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Speaker 2: know what you need?

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Speaker 3: You need a vacation. You me Bahamas tomorrow. What do

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Speaker 3: you say? I guess we'll have to go quick because

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Speaker 3: you're taking all my vacation days. We got the Friday,

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Speaker 3: gotta go all right? Well, truth is I probably belong

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Speaker 3: more in the Virgin Islands because I'm a Virgin. You

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Speaker 3: get okay, I'm gonna stop the frank phone call. Now,

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Speaker 3: this part isn't funny. Broke in Jeffrey's phone taps on

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Speaker 3: the twenties