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Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode Oh Alchemy. This on your

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Speaker 1: host Kevin podcast that Kevin polls. Well, when you're old enough,

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Speaker 1: ask your mom to explain why we didn't bring you

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Speaker 1: a brother and a sister. And if you can remember,

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Speaker 1: to ask her why did she have Dad's balls sniffed?

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Speaker 1: But I Diguesslcolm, I'm not written in by fans particular order.

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Speaker 1: Please say hello to but asked a Ragman niche did

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Speaker 1: you attend the drive in theater growing up? And if so,

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Speaker 1: please share one story about that. I did not. Thank

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Speaker 1: you really never went to a drive in movie forever.

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Speaker 1: Let's give that question to James. Then. Wow, Well I

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Speaker 1: went many times to the drive in theater because my

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Speaker 1: family would find that you could bring a lot of

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Speaker 1: people in one car. The problem was the speakers were

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Speaker 1: so terrible that you don't know. Maybe other people could

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Speaker 1: tune their car into it. Eventually you could. That's not

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Speaker 1: how it was when I was a kid. We all

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Speaker 1: tried to hear, but people's breathing would be over it.

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Speaker 1: I'm much older, so they had people from regional theater

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Speaker 1: stand outside your car and act out before radio. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's that's not real. That's not real. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: so I'm gonna go to Venetia with James's question when

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Speaker 1: training a pet, what's your first rule to follow love?

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Speaker 1: That was completely correct, And James, this week your nickname

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Speaker 1: that we won't get to was James Franco Harrison Ford

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Speaker 1: Franco Harris for that's a great one. Sorry, sweet stop

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Speaker 1: the world he wants to get off. It's Joey Greer,

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Speaker 1: Joseph Joseph and Greer. What's it like when you wake

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Speaker 1: up with the clouds parts so the sun can kiss

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Speaker 1: you good morning? It burns? Thank you for that? And

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Speaker 1: last today, but certainly not least in the big shoes

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Speaker 1: to fill departments. Say hello to Craig Kikowski. How many

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Speaker 1: slices of pizza do you think you've had in your lifetime?

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Speaker 1: Would you be surprised if I told you it's definitely

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Speaker 1: over seven thousand. I would not be surprised. I rarely

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Speaker 1: eat anymore pizza, right, I just can't. But back in

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Speaker 1: the day, back in the day, like I would be

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Speaker 1: ordering a pizza maybe five times a week, Yeah, by

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Speaker 1: myself in Chicago. You got to get the deep dish.

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Speaker 1: But there's so many choices you can get a different

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Speaker 1: pizza every day, Unties, pizzeria, no pizzeria dose. I knew

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Speaker 1: I picked. I knew I picked the right person for

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Speaker 1: that question. All right, let's get your our first in shall.

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Speaker 1: All of today's scene suggestions were gathered from our listeners emails.

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Speaker 1: If you'd like to submit yours, please write to the

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Speaker 1: podcast at your name here at alchemy this dot com.

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Speaker 1: That's your name here at alchemy this dot com. In fact,

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Speaker 1: our first scene comes from listener Ben, who wrote, good

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Speaker 1: morning Alchemists. I'll start as folks often due by declaring

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Speaker 1: my love for Vanessa. It's stunning. But also I want

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Speaker 1: to shout out my Polish dad Craig for all the

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Speaker 1: killer Polish references. You complete me both of them. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: My scene suggestion blade Runner, but instead of hunting replicants,

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Speaker 1: you're hunting cut code, knife, salesman or other marketing scheme items.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Benn, ps free Chris Alvarado, Well, I should

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Speaker 1: mention Chris Alvarado's off Broadway play just will complete as

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Speaker 1: we're recording this Sunday, and he will rejoin as early

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Speaker 1: as next week. I wonder if he got taller. Here's

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Speaker 1: hoping taller and those eyes alight. Alright, alright, let me

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Speaker 1: do the interview, yes please, okay, sure, So just tell

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Speaker 1: me what the image you see and how you feel? Okay,

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Speaker 1: let him Let him answer that, honey, but let him

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Speaker 1: answer that. Why n I need help? Look, it's a cat. Okay.

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Speaker 1: Uh So what do I see? And how do you feel?

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Speaker 1: I see a cat and I feel agitated? Yeah, dilation normal,

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Speaker 1: raising temperature, next image. Oh yeah, let him Let him

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Speaker 1: say that. Oh, that wasn't related to the image. I

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Speaker 1: was talking about something. Every now and then she'll just

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Speaker 1: say turtle or it's a turtle. But in this case,

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Speaker 1: it's weird because it doesn't what I'm gonna go with

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Speaker 1: the fucking turtle. Okay. M hmm. Now you were working

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Speaker 1: off planet on a mining vessel looking for steel for

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Speaker 1: the yes, for the knives. Yes, okay, I was on planet.

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Speaker 1: You were on planet. I was on planet. He was

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Speaker 1: off planet. The time apart wasn't working for us. We're

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Speaker 1: so glad to be back together. That's also true. Take off, clut.

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Speaker 1: Take a look at this image, Tim, What do you

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Speaker 1: think it's a cape? That's a cape? M yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: a cape of some kind. Are you sure? Are you.

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Speaker 1: It's not a cape I would wear, but it's a cape.

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Speaker 1: And how do you feel annoyed? Hm? Okay, Now it

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Speaker 1: says here you were part of a paramilitary organization. Well,

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Speaker 1: he was part of it. I was not. She was

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Speaker 1: on planet. I was on planet, non paramilitary, holding down

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Speaker 1: the home front with the turtle. I uh, yes, yes

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Speaker 1: to your question. To my question, which was paramilitary. You

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Speaker 1: were part of a paramilitary group. Yes, we weren't organize

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Speaker 1: that part you You said organization in the kid, deary.

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Speaker 1: I don't know why I do it every time. Dang it.

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Speaker 1: I think something's happening in the security room. Well, Deckard's

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Speaker 1: conducting another one of his interviews. It looks like he's

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Speaker 1: choking on some things, so he's trying to help him.

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Speaker 1: That guy can handle himself. I don't know what doesn't

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Speaker 1: look like he's tough. Well, right, I guess you're probably right.

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Speaker 1: If we interviewed, he'd get angry at us. We should

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Speaker 1: just turn this off now. Coffee coffee, than you're welcome,

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Speaker 1: boison coffee. You'd like to drink boys and coffee? Sip SIPs?

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Speaker 1: Did you say poison coffee? I said coffee. There's a

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Speaker 1: lot of people getting sick with that space thing. And

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Speaker 1: I don't know if I want to drink anything that

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Speaker 1: sounds like poison coffee. Why would poison coffee? She was

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Speaker 1: singing the poison coffee song. I thought. I thought she

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Speaker 1: said boys and coffin poison coffee. I said, poison. Then

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Speaker 1: you guys both drink first, and then I'll drink. I

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Speaker 1: gotta ask you something, okay, yeah? Anything? Are you a

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Speaker 1: cutcode nice salesperson? Come on, you gotta tell me if

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Speaker 1: you are? You really do yes, I am all right.

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Speaker 1: Don't drink the coffee. If you don't drink the coffee.

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Speaker 1: If you eat, drink about the right now. I'm not

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Speaker 1: drinking drinking. I have a breach in sector three. Breach

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Speaker 1: in sector three? Which one is sector three? Doing my

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Speaker 1: maps are apt? Oh no, yeah, that's the one straight

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Speaker 1: ahead and a little to the left, sector three. If

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Speaker 1: you could check on that first, please? You want me

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Speaker 1: to check on that? Yeah, that's why I called you.

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Speaker 1: I'd rather have Tad check on that. Ted still with us.

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Speaker 1: That's probably an error cleric. Okay, I'll go check it out.

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Speaker 1: I mean, if you want to ask, why don't you

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Speaker 1: check it out? Because I'm still careing that. Why don't

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Speaker 1: you both check it out? Jesus Christ, it doesn't We

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Speaker 1: don't need to have a lot to paint about it. Ted,

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Speaker 1: what why are you agitated this morning? Hear you? Guys pickering?

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Speaker 1: Just go check you should check it out. I'm supposed

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Speaker 1: to be manning the screen. Screens are messed up. I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to picture Sector three if you would. Alright, alright,

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Speaker 1: thanks so much. Handle this. This is bulls, your bullshit, Tad,

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Speaker 1: all right, no come back, No, I'm just gonna do it.

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Speaker 1: It's it's the last effort for me to just go

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Speaker 1: and check it Sector three. There, Dad, you know I'm

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Speaker 1: already going. You're not the boss of me anyways. Yours

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Speaker 1: a pistol lny I guess yeah, Mr Cutko. There seems

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Speaker 1: to be an issue with some of the replicants. What

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Speaker 1: is the issue with the replicants? Some off planets replicants

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Speaker 1: have broken to our system and a selling knives on

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Speaker 1: that's what they're programmed to do, sell knives. But these

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Speaker 1: knives of protocol there, they're their own, They've made their

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Speaker 1: own knives. Then the singularity is taken over exactly as

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Speaker 1: I hope your cat it's not a cat. Oh, it's

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Speaker 1: a replicate. How my friend? Oh hello, what are you

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Speaker 1: selling today? Knives? Nives? Why don't you come inside? It's

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Speaker 1: a knife salesman. It's a knife. What's your name? It's Larry.

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Speaker 1: He's a knife salesman. Do you want me? I think so.

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Speaker 1: Put some meat on, Larry, get in here. Who's that

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Speaker 1: in there with you? That's my wife. I mean we're

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Speaker 1: just a Midwest couple, pretty normal. Come on, and did

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Speaker 1: you ask her to put some meat on? Yeah, you

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Speaker 1: said you were coming in right. I can't cut this meat,

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Speaker 1: It's fine, just tear it in half. Well, get some

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Speaker 1: knife choices. Well that's a great idea. Larry, come inside

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Speaker 1: all the way the threshold. Could I take my shoes off?

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Speaker 1: Don't bother? Oh, I'll just close this behind you. Honey,

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Speaker 1: my hands are slapping. I can't. Don't worry. I think

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Speaker 1: Larry's got a solution for you. What do you think

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Speaker 1: of this? Bad boy? Oh my god, Larry, that's a

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Speaker 1: wonderful knife. Could you go bring that to my wife?

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Speaker 1: She's tearing meat right now. I'd love to bring it

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Speaker 1: to your wife where she's in the kitchen. Follow me,

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Speaker 1: all excuse me a game. Hello, could you use this?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, yes I could. Oh my god. It's

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Speaker 1: a perfect starting price of seven forty nine a week,

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Speaker 1: and this could a week a week? Why would it

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Speaker 1: be a week? We want to keep. You just want

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Speaker 1: to buy it now? Oh you want the one payment price?

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Speaker 1: Huh okay, honey, I just want to do the one

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Speaker 1: payment price with you. I don't want to have a

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Speaker 1: responsibility to remember check every week to send out where

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Speaker 1: how much is it? One time? Is a bit big?

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Speaker 1: The number sounds a bit big. Well, we can handle it.

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Speaker 1: Seventy one. Let's just do it. It's just one dollars

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Speaker 1: for a night? Why not? Because that's how many weeks?

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Speaker 1: Is that? That's seventy weeks? Weeks? Seventy one weeks. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: it sounds like a steel Let's do how much in

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Speaker 1: the set? The whole set? One big price for nuts. Well,

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Speaker 1: there's only four nights. Let's just get them all then

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Speaker 1: seventy one each. There's probably a count where for sevenyone.

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Speaker 1: That does sound like something we want. We want to

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Speaker 1: pay for you to separately, don't we hunt in your nose? No,

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Speaker 1: I think we should get the bulk bundle honestly, maybe

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Speaker 1: we should get a punch. I think I could. This

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Speaker 1: could be the solution to my lost job. I could sell.

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Speaker 1: Let's go get the door. I just let myself in, sloppy.

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Speaker 1: I thought I smelled me next door? Did you? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Well you got some raw meat out here, and we're

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Speaker 1: just amazing that. Thank you. You look a night. Do

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Speaker 1: you have abs now a little bit? Well? Maybe that

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Speaker 1: space virus doesn't hurt everybody. These are some nice Larry

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Speaker 1: was just selling us. Are you My name is Larry Dan.

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Speaker 1: He's funny us. What you do? Larry? Comeable? Silver? Watch out? Now?

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Speaker 1: What part of cut Core are you with? Are you

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Speaker 1: with the mining and distribute? Shouldn't life the sector? Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: just so you don't mind it. You don't. You're not

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Speaker 1: part of the military. I'm on the field, sullen, nice,

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Speaker 1: not salesman like you must be awful rich rich? Yeah, funny,

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Speaker 1: Oh yes, yes I do know with joke. I'm sorry too,

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Speaker 1: kind of talk you for a second. Yes, sure, Wait,

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Speaker 1: you don't lose a Messlet cut your head off with

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Speaker 1: one of these. Your husband just passed, so this is sick.

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Speaker 1: I'm going through something. I understand that. But you can't

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Speaker 1: just be hitting on people like that. Just leave me

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Speaker 1: time to read. Larry, her husband just passed. I think

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Speaker 1: you might have a chance with her. She'd catch you.

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Speaker 1: Sure could cut the tension in here with a knough.

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Speaker 1: I know. Well the thing is is I think right there,

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Speaker 1: Well that is pretty good. Yeah, that is pretty good, Larry,

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Speaker 1: You've got a chance with her. Okay, comes back. You

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Speaker 1: might want to buy some n No, we never even

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Speaker 1: found the boy. I need no way to know if

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Speaker 1: he's still out there. We know he's dead because I've

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Speaker 1: got that feeling and my stomach. He's definitely dead. Larry's here.

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Speaker 1: God closes the door, he opens the window. He like Larry,

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Speaker 1: and I don't know what's up, but something's happening to me.

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Speaker 1: I often felt this way in date. What the devil

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Speaker 1: can make it? So we sent the ransom note your

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Speaker 1: wife and she is not reply. Yes, she says he's

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Speaker 1: probably dead. I don't know what that means. I've been

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Speaker 1: going for less than twenty four hours. Said she would

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Speaker 1: pay ten dollars to set you free, but no reply.

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Speaker 1: I mean that's nothing, but money is ridiculously inflated here

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Speaker 1: in the future too. Ten bucks is like the minimum, right,

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Speaker 1: Maybe you're not speaking the same language when I say bucks,

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Speaker 1: Oh bucks, ten bucks, ten mail deer. Okay, look, I

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Speaker 1: don't know where she's gonna haven't they all kind extinct?

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Speaker 1: Oh no, there's more bucks than ever. Where are the bucks?

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Speaker 1: We have them at a five? Okay? Yeah, and my

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Speaker 1: wife is supposed you have them. But my wife is

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Speaker 1: supposed to get ten of them were collecting. That's so difficult.

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Speaker 1: You know what, she'll pay you anything. We asked for

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Speaker 1: ten bucks. She hasn't replied, what do you want? Okay?

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Speaker 1: Just like, how can we get through to her? Because

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Speaker 1: we have to kill you? Why do you have to

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Speaker 1: kill me? That's how ransom works. We have to take

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Speaker 1: a finger and thumb. Don't if you do that, just

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Speaker 1: kill me, Just kill me immediately. Okay, I don't want

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Speaker 1: Mr Cuco. I found the body of that man that

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Speaker 1: was being held ransom. Did we get the ten box?

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Speaker 1: We got the ten bucks too? He was humor disappointing.

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Speaker 1: I hear there's some cut COO replicants on the loose. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: wait a minute, you said you were going to get

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Speaker 1: the tin buck to you said the ten buck too,

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Speaker 1: That's what I said. No, No, we needed you to

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Speaker 1: get the tim Buck too. Do you want me to

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Speaker 1: get the place timbukto? It's gonna be impossible for me

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Speaker 1: to lift and bring it in. We just want to

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Speaker 1: take Overner ship. Your asks are just so much of people.

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Speaker 1: You understand that? Did you understand that you want me

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Speaker 1: to take location? You don't have, not even the want

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Speaker 1: to own the place you need to deliver. I have

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Speaker 1: an update on how the plan is doing? And please

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Speaker 1: where are the replicates? Are they work? Did we use?

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Speaker 1: Is it funny? Weird way? Stephen? Do you do you

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Speaker 1: want to take this one? Yeah? Sure, I'll take it. Yeah, Okay, Stephen,

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Speaker 1: I'm listening. It's fun. The whole thing is fun. This

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Speaker 1: is not what I want to hear, what I wanted

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Speaker 1: to hear. I just got back from Sector three and ship.

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Speaker 1: You're the fan, okay? Security cards dead, A body shaped

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Speaker 1: hole in the two way near shattered through. I think

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Speaker 1: two people escape. I mean I'm still here. Just for

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Speaker 1: the record, I saw it happened. Was my husband he

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Speaker 1: went to space. I stayed on Earth the whole time.

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Speaker 1: I was here to help him get through this. He

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Speaker 1: got me had one thing went to an I don't

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Speaker 1: know what it hit God, I think she's a replicate.

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Speaker 1: I'm not a rep I am not. I am not.

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Speaker 1: Oh boy, that's not her face. That's not her face.

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Speaker 1: Could go forever. So you saw a replicant around here? Yeah? Man,

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Speaker 1: anything else, I'm gonna drop you off the side of

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Speaker 1: this fucking building. If you don't tell me to man,

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Speaker 1: let me go. Yeah, I mean, don't let me go

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Speaker 1: while I'm hanging over the edge, but put me back

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Speaker 1: on selid ground and then let me. I've been wanting

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Speaker 1: a bite for here. I'm not a baby, lady. You're

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Speaker 1: a baby, now, aren't you. Yes, I'm a baby. Good

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Speaker 1: with me, little baby. What's your child's name? This is

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Speaker 1: dookie beautiful. Yes, it's very large. Mommy, doesn't he I

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Speaker 1: need to feed. I'm happy to oblige. Milk, milk, milk, milk, milk, milk, milk.

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Speaker 1: And around the corner, I'm making fudge. Welcome back to you,

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Speaker 1: around the corner, I'm making fudge. Scene two comes us

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Speaker 1: today from Mark, who wrote, Hello, Welcome. I'm a huge fan.

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Speaker 1: I have been listening since episode one. Your show helps

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Speaker 1: me get through my day at the office. Just today,

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Speaker 1: always find myself having to turn my head to my

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Speaker 1: wall to try to muffle my laugh laughing so I

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Speaker 1: don't disturb my co workers. James Heeney, every time you

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Speaker 1: say God damned in a scene, I lose it and

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Speaker 1: have to face my wall. I always get a little

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Speaker 1: bummed when you're not on an episode. Damn been, Pandrick. Sorry,

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Speaker 1: I love you. I love your answers to Kevin's opening questions.

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Speaker 1: Please elaborate more on them. One of my favorite TV show,

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Speaker 1: Maybe you guys just wanted to go on a secret take.

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Speaker 1: One of my favorite TV shows is a live program

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Speaker 1: that follows police officers. My suggestion for a scene is

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Speaker 1: one police officer when family and friends keep calling into

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Speaker 1: his cell phone at the worst possible times. He takes

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Speaker 1: the calls. He takes the calls, and somebody needs to

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Speaker 1: go to Marcel mar associating and the viewers at home

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Speaker 1: can hear all of his conversations. Keep up the amazing work.

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Speaker 1: I look forward to you every every episode. Thanks for

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Speaker 1: everything else. Just wait, what was the take away from that? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: live live p D officer. Yeah, so getting a phone

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Speaker 1: call from his family. Yeah, you know, all the there's

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Speaker 1: there's these TV shows where there's body cams and on

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Speaker 1: the car and you're just watching Live Police. Yeah and

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Speaker 1: uh and this particular officers getting calls from family and

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Speaker 1: friends while in the middle of doing his job, his

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Speaker 1: or her uh taking calls. Um and we get we

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Speaker 1: at the viewers at home and hear all of these conversations.

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Speaker 1: Keep up the amazing work. I look forward to laughing

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Speaker 1: with you every episode. Thanks for everything. Mark Dwyer from

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Speaker 1: Elliott City, Maryland. We now return you to Live Police.

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Speaker 1: Today we're following officer O'Malley from Santa Fe Doo Doomkum

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Speaker 1: Dong Dong Dong Dong Dong Dong Dong Dong Dong Dong

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Speaker 1: Dong Dong Dong Dong. I'm giving it. Why you over, Well,

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Speaker 1: it turns out you were are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. Um,

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Speaker 1: So I'm just GETNA means you to pass your registration

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Speaker 1: and your license and your insurance. Do you want to

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Speaker 1: take that? Uh? You start working on your part? Okay? Yeah? Alright? Hello,

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Speaker 1: hey dad, you didn't pick me up at soccer practice?

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Speaker 1: Is that today? It's every day? Every day? Oh? I knew,

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Speaker 1: I knew that there was It's four o'clock alright or

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Speaker 1: everybody's been gone for a half hour. Oh wow, here's

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Speaker 1: my license. Well, thank you, thank you. Listen something, do

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Speaker 1: you mind? What are you doing? What am I doing?

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm just hold on one second's rest? Hold on? Okay,

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Speaker 1: we're just gracious. How would you know that? Just taking

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Speaker 1: a guess? Yeah, it is my son. Yeah, he's I

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Speaker 1: left him at soccer practice again. Do you need me

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Speaker 1: to go pick him up? Would you sure? Because I

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Speaker 1: I gotta work for a photo. Well, hey, hold on

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Speaker 1: one second, Hey, buddy sport. Yeah, I heard everything. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: Oh I thought I had you muted. I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. What I'm supposed to send a picture

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Speaker 1: of myself? Some creep up. It's a longtime friend of mine.

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Speaker 1: We go way back. What's his name? His name is Keith. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so Keith is going to pick me up. Just send

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Speaker 1: me a picture so he knows what you look like.

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Speaker 1: You know what I look? Don't you know what I look?

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Speaker 1: Of course I know what you look like. But described

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Speaker 1: me to him? Okay, alright, let me put you on mute. Now. Okay,

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Speaker 1: he's gonna be wearing a soccer uniform. Are you familiar

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Speaker 1: with this? Yes? Yes, you should know that. Although he's

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Speaker 1: on mute and can't speak, of course, he's still listening

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Speaker 1: to Oh, okay, okay. And that's Officer O'Malley over there

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Speaker 1: in the Chicago Diamond District. He's doing routine traffic stops

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Speaker 1: over there. Looks like, wait, Luke, that was in Santa fe. Oh,

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Speaker 1: my mistake. That is my mistake. That is my mistakes.

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Speaker 1: It looks like there's some booger sugar and we're having

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Speaker 1: a good time over here. And so we're going to

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Speaker 1: the District of Columbia. What looks like they're doing a

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Speaker 1: house raid. We're following Sergeant Tafter. Oh, this should be fun.

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Speaker 1: Open up, it's Sergeant Tafter. Sergeant Tafter, DC Police. Fuck me,

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Speaker 1: fuck you, fuck this is a house raid. Fuck we

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Speaker 1: have a warrant for your arrest. Suck my butt, dude, dude,

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Speaker 1: you gotta stop at that. Let me just open the

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Speaker 1: door and let him in. Oh man, they're gonna shooters

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Speaker 1: or take her ship. Okay, hold on, hold on a second. Hello, Hi,

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Speaker 1: are you Are you satisfied with your cable company? Right now?

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Speaker 1: What are you satisfied with the service? Sergeant Tafter at

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Speaker 1: DC Police, I'm doing a house raid right now. This

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Speaker 1: is this is Craig and I'm from Rising, and we've

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Speaker 1: got a new kind of it's it's a higher speed

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Speaker 1: than you think. Cable, the couple in your area, we

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Speaker 1: got motherfuck? How many does you have to fuck to

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Speaker 1: fuck you? I'm so sorry, Craig. Okay, thank you. Okay,

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Speaker 1: look I I how fast do we talk? We're talking

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Speaker 1: ten times speed of normal stuff? Ten times? Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: got another call. Okay, I'm gonna put you a mute. Hello.

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Speaker 1: What was that about this morning? What was Why did

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Speaker 1: you leave the house like that. I'm on a house raid.

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Speaker 1: You're on a house it's my job. You have a

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Speaker 1: house to keep up here. Okay, I'm at home. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: why did you just walk out on that conversation? We

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Speaker 1: weren't done something. I thought we were done. No, we

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Speaker 1: weren't done because you have not forgiven my sister completely.

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Speaker 1: I can tell you're holding onto something. Okay, Look as

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Speaker 1: as your sister, he's staying with us, I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to forgive her to stay here. You have to forget

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Speaker 1: let me talk to don't put Denise. I'm okay, here

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Speaker 1: you go, Denise. Hello, David, Hello, Denise. Listen. I know

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Speaker 1: you think that the bathroom is only for you, but

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Speaker 1: sometimes I gotta be in there. Okay, but I look,

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Speaker 1: I have an important job, all right. You gotta get

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Speaker 1: up at the morning and here you do not brush

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Speaker 1: her off. No one can use the back. I'm not

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Speaker 1: brushing her off. Okay, what bathroom in this house? Okay?

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Speaker 1: You've gone on one job interview in one month of

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Speaker 1: living with us. Okay, what could you possibly need to

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Speaker 1: get ready for it? Don't change the subject. You're so

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Speaker 1: successful you have a house with one bathroom. Okay, hold

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Speaker 1: on a second. Alright, I've got something more important to

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Speaker 1: deal with. Craig. Are you there, I'm still here. I

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Speaker 1: I'm Are you interested in switching over? We'll pay the

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Speaker 1: fees for the switch. I don't want just faster internet.

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Speaker 1: I want cable. I want cable. I want a landline

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Speaker 1: as well. Do you have some sort of three and

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Speaker 1: one pack? Alright? Well, that was Sergeant Jack there right there,

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Speaker 1: and hopefully he gets that deal done and we can, uh,

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Speaker 1: we can. You know what's funny about the word deal?

398
00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:14,960
Speaker 1: You use it in cards almost every day. Yeah. Yeah,

399
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Speaker 1: let's go to Florida. Let's go to Florida. Please have

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Speaker 1: police Dabby Roger. Can I see you guys in my office? Yeah,

401
00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:36,600
Speaker 1: I'm Roger. Yeah that's correct. Uh you guys. I've just

402
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:40,320
Speaker 1: been going over some of the edits and is it hot?

403
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:42,400
Speaker 1: Come open the window, Come up in the window. There's

404
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,360
Speaker 1: air conditioning and it's blow. Just wear a bathing suit

405
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 1: to work like I do. Steve. I'm gonna say a

406
00:26:48,119 --> 00:26:53,960
Speaker 1: word to you, and I don't want you to win. Roger, Roger, Roger,

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Speaker 1: it's rehab, Roger. Is that you you copy what I'm saying?

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Speaker 1: Is that what you mean by you're peting Rodger? Okay,

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00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 1: we have I think Steve has a problem too, right,

410
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:06,840
Speaker 1: so we've got I think Steve has a problem too.

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Speaker 1: And you know what, I can say that with the

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Speaker 1: confidence on this side, I don't have a problem, but

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Speaker 1: I can see them in other people. Yeah, another season, Sorry, Steve,

414
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:19,399
Speaker 1: we are doing another season. It's great. It's gonna go

415
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 1: and I'm ready to go right now. You're going to rehab.

416
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,399
Speaker 1: You're doing coke on air and drop an F bombs

417
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,840
Speaker 1: like a sailor who gives a ship hu And all

418
00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 1: I have is a little alcohol, So I hope think

419
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:33,199
Speaker 1: that's a bad look. We do show about cops, all right,

420
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:35,240
Speaker 1: we can do whatever we want on the show. Okay,

421
00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:40,800
Speaker 1: that's not how it works. Coming on, you tasted. I

422
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:44,400
Speaker 1: can keep steering the ship, keep renting money. Month, I'm

423
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 1: gonna pay you in cocaine. Okay, next month you get

424
00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:50,520
Speaker 1: back from rehab, I'm gonna pay you with a check.

425
00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:52,760
Speaker 1: I want you to go to a bank and take

426
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:57,600
Speaker 1: that check with you have cocaine there. Maybe that's but

427
00:27:58,000 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 1: that's the rehab is supposed to change up the point

428
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:03,880
Speaker 1: you guys freezing there now when we do live PD,

429
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:06,480
Speaker 1: we know who the funk you are. We were listening

430
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:16,080
Speaker 1: to your thing. We're the Pots studio. I'm tripping out.

431
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 1: I'm tping the officer. It's called the random number. Hello,

432
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:33,200
Speaker 1: who is this. It's Grandpa Joe. It's Grandpa Joe. Listen.

433
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 1: I don't have a Grandpa Joe. But I'm I'm I'm

434
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:41,640
Speaker 1: an alien. No alien, I'm an alien. Oh my god.

435
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 1: Hold on, guys, I've made contact Holy ship. Alright, so listen,

436
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:51,840
Speaker 1: this is a this is a private line, and you've

437
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:55,800
Speaker 1: pretty much gotten to the leader of the people humans.

438
00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:58,520
Speaker 1: I'm a human leader. Yeah yeah, yeah, good good need

439
00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:01,760
Speaker 1: Oh I got another call. Do not hang up. Okay,

440
00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 1: Hello dad, it's me. That creepy guys put me up

441
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,640
Speaker 1: and he kidnapped me. Know what's he want? What's he want?

442
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 1: What do you want? Tell me it's I want ten dollars.

443
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:15,640
Speaker 1: He was ten dollars. That's reasonable. That's totally reasonable. Okay,

444
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:17,720
Speaker 1: tell him I'll venmo whim if he lets you out.

445
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 1: I don't know how I'm gonna get him to cash.

446
00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:25,520
Speaker 1: I want it in quarters. He wants it in quarters,

447
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:27,880
Speaker 1: So that's just a roll of quarters. That's easy. Okay,

448
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:30,840
Speaker 1: hold on, I'm gonna put you on mute alien and

449
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:33,320
Speaker 1: that we can just figure out to wait to alien. Hello, Yes,

450
00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:36,120
Speaker 1: what kind of technology do you have for WI your transfers?

451
00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:39,880
Speaker 1: Your dad thinks she's talking to an alien? Wait, how

452
00:29:39,920 --> 00:29:46,680
Speaker 1: do you say? Apple? Apple? Apple? Steve stupid? I'm sorry

453
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:52,200
Speaker 1: to sound up. We gotta get okay, okay, okay, look

454
00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:54,120
Speaker 1: at me, Steve, at me. See We've done a lot

455
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:55,680
Speaker 1: of crazy things, and this is gonna be the craziest

456
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:59,360
Speaker 1: one yet. We're going to convince those policemen to get

457
00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:03,400
Speaker 1: out of No. What do we do? Help me? Crazy

458
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:07,719
Speaker 1: that we're gonna be the same body that we can

459
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:11,840
Speaker 1: show your arms. You could join your dreaming Steve, You've

460
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:23,240
Speaker 1: always been a please. Ah I love on. The scene

461
00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:25,280
Speaker 1: ends and everyone just looks at each other like, yeah,

462
00:30:25,280 --> 00:30:27,560
Speaker 1: I think that's it. I don't think we should do anymore.

463
00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: It wouldn't be watching Top Top. Our final scene of

464
00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:38,920
Speaker 1: the day comes to us from Barbara wrote, Hello, welcome this.

465
00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 1: I listened to the show while responding to emails at work.

466
00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:46,600
Speaker 1: I frequently have to stop and reread the emails because

467
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:50,640
Speaker 1: the show is way more interesting. That's a compliment, right,

468
00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:55,360
Speaker 1: is more than an email. Emails can be fascinating, right,

469
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:57,600
Speaker 1: burn to those emails before we're joining further. I just

470
00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 1: want to step out of us for a second, and

471
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 1: asked James a question. That's all this is not in

472
00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:05,920
Speaker 1: the email. Um, you understand how mute works. Right, When

473
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:08,960
Speaker 1: I put somebody on and they can hear you, you

474
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:13,680
Speaker 1: can't hear them. Okay, I guess you're right. I guess

475
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:16,600
Speaker 1: you're right. I mean it's possibly you've got a different

476
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:18,960
Speaker 1: phone point, but if you knew your phone, they can't

477
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:25,200
Speaker 1: hear you. Right, mute, you can't hear me. That's right,

478
00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:29,840
Speaker 1: that's right. You don't like never before We're going to

479
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 1: get to the bottom of this one, damn it. My

480
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:37,000
Speaker 1: suggestion for the crew is a standard office bullpen full

481
00:31:37,040 --> 00:31:40,560
Speaker 1: of common coworkers. The guy who brings fish for lunch,

482
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:45,480
Speaker 1: the person who the person who hums or sings along

483
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:48,120
Speaker 1: with the music on their headphones, the person who insists

484
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:51,880
Speaker 1: on tapping, tapping, all caps tapping. I'm sure the team

485
00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 1: has better ideas. The night I love the show, Barbara

486
00:31:56,800 --> 00:32:01,360
Speaker 1: who microwaved fesshion this in this Michael shunk up the

487
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:07,640
Speaker 1: whole room. Yeah, that's me. That's disgusting everybody face. Okay,

488
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:09,920
Speaker 1: so I gotta heat up my fish. It smells like

489
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:17,280
Speaker 1: stinking smells like fish. It smells terrible. Lack knack. Let's say,

490
00:32:17,320 --> 00:32:25,560
Speaker 1: who's there, Linda, Linda, No, it's just me joke. That's

491
00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:27,680
Speaker 1: a funny way to enter a room. It's not a

492
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:30,040
Speaker 1: funny way. You're supposed to have a good joke of Okay,

493
00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:33,360
Speaker 1: Well here's a joke. Okay, which one you ate? My

494
00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 1: YEO play? Yeah, answer her that I had a yo

495
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:39,360
Speaker 1: play right here that said Linda on it cherry on

496
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:43,760
Speaker 1: the bottom. It says Linda on the bottom. No, there

497
00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:46,880
Speaker 1: was cherry on the bottom. It was yo play cherry

498
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,840
Speaker 1: on the black bottom, said Linda. I wrote it on

499
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:52,360
Speaker 1: the front and sharpie and on the top on the foil.

500
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,360
Speaker 1: I had no idea. I didn't. I thought that you

501
00:32:56,520 --> 00:33:02,920
Speaker 1: are what. You're a joke, your stupid, You're stuck in

502
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:05,280
Speaker 1: your beard. This is just great. This is just you

503
00:33:05,320 --> 00:33:08,320
Speaker 1: know what. I'm gonna go back to my office hungry, okay,

504
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 1: and pissed. Good job, don I don't think came in

505
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:18,000
Speaker 1: here because the smelly fish. And look what happened here.

506
00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:19,360
Speaker 1: Let me ask you something. I just got a new

507
00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:23,120
Speaker 1: cell phone. Um, when I hit mute on my cell phone,

508
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:26,800
Speaker 1: that means no one can hear me. Right, you hit mute?

509
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:31,160
Speaker 1: It's isn't the picture of the microphone? Let me see

510
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:34,600
Speaker 1: your phone really quick? Yeah, so let me see mute.

511
00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:36,360
Speaker 1: But if oh my god, I didn't mean to open

512
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,240
Speaker 1: these pictures up. What are you doing in this picture?

513
00:33:39,480 --> 00:33:44,640
Speaker 1: I'm skiing, yeah, but naked, so it's weird, like it's

514
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:47,000
Speaker 1: a big leg. This is inappropriate. I don't want to

515
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:51,320
Speaker 1: seek your phone. Hey, Sean, yes, yeah, check this out.

516
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 1: I got all these sex scenes. It's all those famous movies.

517
00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:58,680
Speaker 1: I'm a computer. You wanna sex scenes from famous movies

518
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:01,720
Speaker 1: you want to watch them like Desperate Auto, and I

519
00:34:01,840 --> 00:34:04,440
Speaker 1: haven't seen desperad what's the famous sex scene that's some

520
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:10,080
Speaker 1: high agen an Tony manderis just okay, you know I

521
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:13,000
Speaker 1: don't want to see that. I've got to I've got

522
00:34:13,080 --> 00:34:15,360
Speaker 1: to write greeting cards. Okay, okay, I gotta do what

523
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 1: I'm here to do. Guys, I interrupt, Why do you

524
00:34:18,680 --> 00:34:22,320
Speaker 1: think someone wants to hear when their pet has passed

525
00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:27,040
Speaker 1: or just got in the turcky diagnosis? A turkey diagnosis, No,

526
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:34,000
Speaker 1: turkey diagnosis, tricky diagnosis. I don't know, that's very specific. No,

527
00:34:34,080 --> 00:34:35,880
Speaker 1: I'm trying to pitch some of the stuff I was

528
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:40,520
Speaker 1: thinking sorry about, but you know why you were getting

529
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 1: into how about this? This might hurt to gobble, but

530
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:50,720
Speaker 1: we can do. There's a lot, a lot of pets parkins.

531
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 1: I eccellently did look into that, but I'm my good pet. Well,

532
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:57,800
Speaker 1: maybe there's a magician in a hat and a cane

533
00:34:57,960 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 1: and it says, sorry, you got a tricky diagnos this. Oh,

534
00:35:01,239 --> 00:35:04,680
Speaker 1: you know what you can do. Magicians do tricks. Oh,

535
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:09,000
Speaker 1: I got the magician where the rabbitness ends? And maybe

536
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:12,920
Speaker 1: you should get next time. It's a turkey intid of rebbic. No,

537
00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:17,759
Speaker 1: it's not a turkey. What's that? What's that? Antonio? Yeah,

538
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:21,319
Speaker 1: I'm watching the sex. Can't watch that? I mean you say,

539
00:35:21,480 --> 00:35:26,480
Speaker 1: of course, I can't even basically except for that they're grinding. Yeah,

540
00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:31,080
Speaker 1: it's ready G for grinding. That's a good card. Your

541
00:35:31,160 --> 00:35:33,880
Speaker 1: birthday is ready G for grinds. Like, let me fast

542
00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:37,279
Speaker 1: forward to the there's a stripper coming out the fight

543
00:35:37,520 --> 00:35:38,880
Speaker 1: You know, I got a whole bunch of I got

544
00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:40,320
Speaker 1: all the sex scenes. Kee up, so I got this

545
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:44,960
Speaker 1: one from fight Club? Oh god, yeah, is that Helena

546
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:51,120
Speaker 1: Bottom Carter sex? It's crazy sex. I got all the

547
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 1: sex scenes ta tanic you name it was the way

548
00:35:54,440 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 1: nipple looks in that film? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I

549
00:35:58,280 --> 00:36:00,759
Speaker 1: got all the nipples. Okay, this is not appropriate for

550
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:07,400
Speaker 1: an office We all funny about Phil. It's make believe,

551
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:10,880
Speaker 1: but it's also real. I don't know what our nipples looking. Oh,

552
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:13,160
Speaker 1: I got one. I got one. If it's too much

553
00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:19,480
Speaker 1: of a gobble and you've got a hobble, hey, just

554
00:36:19,680 --> 00:36:24,320
Speaker 1: feel better. That's good, right, that's not good at all, Karen,

555
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,480
Speaker 1: uh Hi, I got your card, and um I was

556
00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:32,359
Speaker 1: just found a little confusing well, you know what, you're

557
00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:36,720
Speaker 1: going to appreciate the gesture. You're welcome, But I don't hobble,

558
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:41,000
Speaker 1: and um, I don't understand the use of the word gobble. Okay,

559
00:36:41,080 --> 00:36:45,000
Speaker 1: Well Daniel, Um, first, I thank you for approaching me

560
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:47,839
Speaker 1: and telling me how you felt. Right. Well, you've got

561
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:51,120
Speaker 1: a slightly larger cubicle than I do, so I want

562
00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:54,399
Speaker 1: always come by. I'd rather spend time here than my own.

563
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:58,959
Speaker 1: But in this case I came with questions, specifically about

564
00:36:58,960 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 1: the card you gave me. Well, again, thank you, I

565
00:37:02,360 --> 00:37:04,839
Speaker 1: hear you. I appreciate you. Thank you for coming over.

566
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 1: You feel safe right now? Am I had a good

567
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:11,400
Speaker 1: distance for sure? Yes? And the hobble and gobble? Do

568
00:37:11,520 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 1: you hobble? Is my hand too close? Now? It's the

569
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 1: same distance you've just you haven't moved it. Um, you

570
00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:27,600
Speaker 1: do hobble and you do have a gobble. So if

571
00:37:27,640 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 1: I was, are you okay, Daniel, Daniel, wake up, Daniel,

572
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:41,000
Speaker 1: wake up? Daniel? Oh my god? What then, Daniel Daniel Okay, okay,

573
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:43,359
Speaker 1: I'm taking him to jail. I'm taking him to jail,

574
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:48,600
Speaker 1: citizen arrested as your co worker. I saw what happened.

575
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:52,640
Speaker 1: I saw that I'm taking you to jail. You're taking

576
00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:55,799
Speaker 1: me to jail. Honey. Look I got cuffs. I got

577
00:37:57,040 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 1: who cooked the fish in the toilet? I have cooked

578
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,239
Speaker 1: the fish in the goddamn toilet. That's disgusting, man, this

579
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:06,520
Speaker 1: is a communal toilet. Gave me cooking fish in here.

580
00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:11,040
Speaker 1: I didn't cook the fish. You left it in there.

581
00:38:11,719 --> 00:38:14,840
Speaker 1: That was Ali and he dropped it in there. I

582
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,719
Speaker 1: was just try it up a little. God damn it,

583
00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:21,719
Speaker 1: my teeth are soft. Give a goddamn about your teeth?

584
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 1: Is a communal sharing Well, I thought better of it

585
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 1: and I left the tire. Goddamn it. To that sucks

586
00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:36,520
Speaker 1: rather the toilet smell like him ship or wine? Right?

587
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:39,360
Speaker 1: You are you gonna make some toilet wine? I was

588
00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:42,480
Speaker 1: gonna right, and you got some fish in there? I

589
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:44,640
Speaker 1: will put I don't put a little bit of fist

590
00:38:44,719 --> 00:38:49,400
Speaker 1: to say what what happen? If I s around? Happened?

591
00:38:51,320 --> 00:38:54,960
Speaker 1: My ninjas broke them right, So I thought it might

592
00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 1: if I'll swar it a on the toilet, and it

593
00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:59,880
Speaker 1: was blended, but it got really wet. I think you

594
00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:01,920
Speaker 1: won't you believe you had a ninja on the outside.

595
00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:03,839
Speaker 1: Ain't no way you could afford a god damn ninja.

596
00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:07,839
Speaker 1: I got given a ninja by my niece. There's only

597
00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:09,920
Speaker 1: one way to smuggle a ninja in here, and you

598
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:13,360
Speaker 1: don't want to do They don't No, hell no, I

599
00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:17,440
Speaker 1: don't have a ninja. Has a ninja and now it's

600
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:22,000
Speaker 1: in the toilet. Ninja was confiscrated, right, so I'm trying

601
00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:24,480
Speaker 1: to use the toilet because Ninja taught me to complain

602
00:39:24,719 --> 00:39:28,319
Speaker 1: things with a circular. I'm saying, we've got a new

603
00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:36,920
Speaker 1: person here. He's fresh guy. He might have narcolepsy. He

604
00:39:37,040 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 1: fell asleep and that's how he ended up in here,

605
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:42,799
Speaker 1: So say that's illegally. I was in an office, man,

606
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:45,920
Speaker 1: and I was being respectful with a distance with my hand.

607
00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:48,720
Speaker 1: Just the hell up, man, you're dealing with murderous killers

608
00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:51,320
Speaker 1: and people that kill. Or do you feel safe? It

609
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:53,920
Speaker 1: is my hand too close and hadn't moved from when

610
00:39:53,960 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 1: it when it started. I think he's dozing off. Wake up, up, prison, Justine.

611
00:40:08,239 --> 00:40:11,240
Speaker 1: Let's give him a prison. Stole swirling, Okay, I gotta

612
00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:13,840
Speaker 1: I gotta walk away, Guys, I can't watch this. I

613
00:40:13,920 --> 00:40:17,759
Speaker 1: can't watch short. Sorry, I gotta lock it up. It

614
00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:21,040
Speaker 1: looks like there's a some commotion going down cellblock three. No,

615
00:40:21,200 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 1: I think it looks like there's some commotion. They're putting

616
00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:28,240
Speaker 1: that guy in the toilet. I've been taking this improv class,

617
00:40:28,560 --> 00:40:31,960
Speaker 1: and I'm just looking at everything as material. Everything is material.

618
00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:38,120
Speaker 1: Wants coffee? Wait? Did you say poison coffy and coffee?

619
00:40:41,120 --> 00:40:44,480
Speaker 1: Nothing but boys, that's a character. I tried an improp

620
00:40:44,560 --> 00:40:52,880
Speaker 1: She fancy, I can definitely a crumpet. A crumpet, by

621
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:55,920
Speaker 1: the way, is anybody I think it's like a Scones neighbor.

622
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:59,480
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know it's going to jas

623
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:01,640
Speaker 1: a crumpet. Yeah, I think so, I think so. What

624
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:04,920
Speaker 1: kind of coffee do we have today? Poison coffee drinking? Okay,

625
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 1: it's a strange way to drink coffee. Yes, And what

626
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:26,480
Speaker 1: do you want to me? Are you guys? Aren't you

627
00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:30,759
Speaker 1: guys supposed to be wanting security? What's going on? There's

628
00:41:30,760 --> 00:41:34,520
Speaker 1: a prison riot going up? Are you seriously wake up?

629
00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:37,600
Speaker 1: Wake How long? We we just had some coffee and

630
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:40,680
Speaker 1: past down the coffee that's not supposed to have a

631
00:41:40,719 --> 00:41:43,760
Speaker 1: coffee supposed to wake up? Where's Chloe? Where is Chloe

632
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:51,160
Speaker 1: the coffee lady? All right, I'm busting all of you out, Yes,

633
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:56,600
Speaker 1: all of you, let's go. I have the keys. I

634
00:41:56,719 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 1: work here, so we're blowing out the back or what's

635
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:01,600
Speaker 1: going on right out the front? Why are you doing that?

636
00:42:02,239 --> 00:42:05,880
Speaker 1: Because this prison system in this country is fucked because

637
00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:09,360
Speaker 1: it's privatized. Yes, because it's privatized. Go on, go on.

638
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:14,200
Speaker 1: Are you gonna come with us where you have only blenders? Yes? Yes,

639
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:17,520
Speaker 1: there's ninjas wherever you want to go here, dying thing,

640
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:22,840
Speaker 1: you're gonna get one, promoter. Let me pull out your

641
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:27,680
Speaker 1: face because I've been trying to pull it out everyone.

642
00:42:28,360 --> 00:42:30,719
Speaker 1: You you son of a bitch. You're staying here? Why

643
00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:35,480
Speaker 1: because my hands comes? No? Not you? You wait a second, now,

644
00:42:35,680 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 1: are you sure you want to let all of us out?

645
00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:48,319
Speaker 1: That guy office? That guy, my hands right here, you creep.

646
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 1: You're not letting me out now? You should steak weird.

647
00:42:52,120 --> 00:42:54,600
Speaker 1: You're weird man. You deserve to be where you are.

648
00:42:55,719 --> 00:42:57,920
Speaker 1: It's weird if I put my hand right here though,

649
00:42:59,760 --> 00:43:02,600
Speaker 1: from where you haven't moved your hand. I used to

650
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:07,399
Speaker 1: work at that same greeting card company earlier this week. Yeah,

651
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:14,279
Speaker 1: I had murdered. Well, we gotta go, all right, Thank

652
00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:17,840
Speaker 1: you for coming over to greeting cards, greeting cards, greeting cards.

653
00:43:18,320 --> 00:43:21,480
Speaker 1: Uh and starting work day. This does not count as

654
00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:26,880
Speaker 1: a lunch break. And um, yes a question? Yes, is

655
00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:29,080
Speaker 1: it true we're meeting to moving the whole company to

656
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:34,360
Speaker 1: the greeting cards district? Yes? Uh, Cuco Knives have integrated

657
00:43:34,440 --> 00:43:37,920
Speaker 1: us into their bigger projects. Were part of the family.

658
00:43:38,080 --> 00:43:39,960
Speaker 1: Now we are. They had just bought us, they're going

659
00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:43,239
Speaker 1: public and they're developing spacecraft, so they need Is there

660
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:45,919
Speaker 1: gonna be redundancy issues? Are we all keeping our jobs?

661
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:49,360
Speaker 1: These questions will all be answered in your separate packages. Okay,

662
00:43:49,560 --> 00:43:54,280
Speaker 1: oh yeah, what were you severing? Everything will be answered

663
00:43:54,320 --> 00:43:57,280
Speaker 1: in your severance package. Happening all right? Now, Look, everyone

664
00:43:57,360 --> 00:44:00,840
Speaker 1: here has a fantastic job. But from you know, the

665
00:44:00,920 --> 00:44:04,520
Speaker 1: right just started my girl's night outline. Let's hear the

666
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:09,120
Speaker 1: first is that affect Let's do this chardonnay? There you

667
00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:12,560
Speaker 1: go with that level of let's do this, and then so,

668
00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:18,120
Speaker 1: let's do this, Let's do this, and then negative is

669
00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:20,759
Speaker 1: that picture of a horse chugging wine? Look, I I

670
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:22,879
Speaker 1: wish when you want to go on a rodeo theme

671
00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:25,960
Speaker 1: bridal shower. I think everyone will be happy with the

672
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:29,279
Speaker 1: packages that we have. Are you happy with yours? I

673
00:44:29,400 --> 00:44:32,200
Speaker 1: am working with cut. I want to go back to you, Dan.

674
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 1: You you haven't even seen the card and you're brushing

675
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:38,080
Speaker 1: it off like it's a stupid idea. Because there's a

676
00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:42,160
Speaker 1: horse saying no, chardonnay nay, let's do this. It's for

677
00:44:42,280 --> 00:44:45,520
Speaker 1: a girl's bachelorette weaken on a rodeo farm kind of

678
00:44:45,560 --> 00:44:49,240
Speaker 1: a thing. It made sense. It wasn't stupid for dancing.

679
00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:53,719
Speaker 1: That says watch me. All right, let's just okay, let's stop.

680
00:44:53,760 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 1: We're not spitballing anymore. Okay, okay, this company's being absorbed

681
00:44:57,800 --> 00:45:00,480
Speaker 1: in the cut code nine. We've got to finish this campaign.

682
00:45:00,600 --> 00:45:03,160
Speaker 1: What if what if the name names were musical notes,

683
00:45:03,200 --> 00:45:12,520
Speaker 1: just name work. Either one's with chardonnay. This is also

684
00:45:12,640 --> 00:45:15,040
Speaker 1: it doesn't have to end with chardonnay either. That was

685
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:16,719
Speaker 1: just where I landed with it, but it could be.

686
00:45:17,040 --> 00:45:21,520
Speaker 1: Um mohito, No you didn't. You can't break this team up.

687
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:25,480
Speaker 1: We're so good to gether are in Australian bed Peano

688
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:30,880
Speaker 1: nar that's funny, right, okay, that's good. In the wheelbarrow

689
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:35,879
Speaker 1: is everyone's everyone's package. Wheel barrow. You could just pick

690
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:37,960
Speaker 1: up one of the manilla folders. It's all the same

691
00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:41,759
Speaker 1: names on them. Our turkey cards are just rolling out

692
00:45:41,840 --> 00:45:45,560
Speaker 1: next week. Yes, those were keeping. Those circuit cards are fantastic.

693
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:47,560
Speaker 1: Can I go back up to my cubicle and get

694
00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:49,399
Speaker 1: the pictures of my family? No? Every time I get

695
00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:51,400
Speaker 1: to keep my I p Can I take girls night

696
00:45:51,440 --> 00:45:53,640
Speaker 1: out elsewhere? No? You said it inside the building, so

697
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 1: that's ours. I'm sorry. We appreciate everyone's work and your time.

698
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:00,640
Speaker 1: When you say we appreciate every ones were who are

699
00:46:00,640 --> 00:46:04,120
Speaker 1: you representing, Mr Kuko? I don't think so. Why don't

700
00:46:04,120 --> 00:46:10,520
Speaker 1: we go to office? Right? Hold on? Hello? What brings

701
00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:13,239
Speaker 1: you here? First of all, I love your cat? Thank you.

702
00:46:14,320 --> 00:46:16,040
Speaker 1: It's not a cat, by the way, what is it?

703
00:46:16,400 --> 00:46:21,719
Speaker 1: It's a replicant? Oh that's right. What's the replican's name? What?

704
00:46:22,680 --> 00:46:26,160
Speaker 1: What bothers you name it? Good point? Okay, tell me this.

705
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:29,880
Speaker 1: There's a beautiful there's a card and it's got a

706
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:33,080
Speaker 1: waif with high heels on and a swinging little ponytail,

707
00:46:33,120 --> 00:46:37,120
Speaker 1: and it's incursive and and it says, um, oh you're

708
00:46:37,239 --> 00:46:44,680
Speaker 1: my more teeny tiny girlfriend. So you want to stop me? Okay, okay,

709
00:46:44,719 --> 00:46:47,040
Speaker 1: I don't get I don't get the card. First of all,

710
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 1: you have to see the image. Second of all, greeting

711
00:46:50,200 --> 00:46:53,960
Speaker 1: cards are a dying business. I'm in two things, knives

712
00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:58,400
Speaker 1: and space. All right, we're moving your office to the

713
00:46:58,480 --> 00:47:01,440
Speaker 1: greeting card district. But how are you going to everyone

714
00:47:02,200 --> 00:47:05,560
Speaker 1: into the greeting card game? Yeah? Look, did Joel not

715
00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:11,480
Speaker 1: bring a wheelbarrel full of severance packages into the bullpen? Yes? Okay?

716
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:14,960
Speaker 1: Was that Joel that we killed? Did you kill him?

717
00:47:15,320 --> 00:47:20,040
Speaker 1: He didn't give us a choice? Any meany miney Martini? See, Okay,

718
00:47:20,120 --> 00:47:22,839
Speaker 1: there's there's no off switch in the office. Look, I'll

719
00:47:22,880 --> 00:47:29,160
Speaker 1: tell you what. You clearly are creative, creative and artists,

720
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 1: and you want to keep your intellectual property for you.

721
00:47:33,719 --> 00:47:38,040
Speaker 1: So what if we killed you? And then wait wait wait, no, no,

722
00:47:38,239 --> 00:47:42,240
Speaker 1: and he let me know the whole thing out finish.

723
00:47:43,280 --> 00:47:47,240
Speaker 1: I don't want hear the what if we killed you? Okay,

724
00:47:48,160 --> 00:47:50,880
Speaker 1: bear with me there. Maybe I'll put that part at

725
00:47:50,880 --> 00:47:55,719
Speaker 1: the end. Okay, okay, Um, what if what if your

726
00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:59,880
Speaker 1: brains were still with the company? Okay, stayed with the

727
00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:03,600
Speaker 1: company in perpetuity throughout the years. That sounds really good

728
00:48:03,920 --> 00:48:06,240
Speaker 1: because I just love I can't stop. You know, I'm

729
00:48:06,280 --> 00:48:08,480
Speaker 1: a creator. I want to make people happy. I want

730
00:48:08,520 --> 00:48:10,360
Speaker 1: to give the words to people that they give to

731
00:48:10,440 --> 00:48:14,440
Speaker 1: other people. Yes, so we'll transfer you, will transfer your

732
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:20,279
Speaker 1: consciousness into a server. What where does our body go?

733
00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:22,920
Speaker 1: Where does your body? We're going to kill you and

734
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:29,719
Speaker 1: then we're going to No. Yeah, no that doesn't feel Yeah,

735
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:36,839
Speaker 1: we'll take that. Oh this is fun. Thirteen thirteen. Put

736
00:48:36,920 --> 00:48:43,279
Speaker 1: on this. It's you have to see the picture. I

737
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 1: have it on my phone. Um it's a was skiing.

738
00:48:50,080 --> 00:48:56,799
Speaker 1: Um so it's um, it's a Jewish boy and he's

739
00:48:56,920 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 1: he's wearing all the things and it's like, thirteen thirteen.

740
00:49:00,120 --> 00:49:03,440
Speaker 1: Put on this because teams love to accessorize, and it's like,

741
00:49:03,520 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 1: put on this, don't look I am cut if I may.

742
00:49:07,719 --> 00:49:10,200
Speaker 1: What goes in that card also as a check and

743
00:49:10,320 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 1: that's truly all the kid's going to see anyway. And

744
00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:14,480
Speaker 1: on the inside it says I love you this much

745
00:49:14,680 --> 00:49:19,800
Speaker 1: and it has a dollar sign, so you write them amount, okay, knives, space, robots.

746
00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:21,760
Speaker 1: I'm also going to throw any other thing that interested

747
00:49:21,880 --> 00:49:24,080
Speaker 1: and greeting cards I don't know, But how are you

748
00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:26,400
Speaker 1: going to let people know about the company of yours

749
00:49:26,480 --> 00:49:30,800
Speaker 1: if not to send out greeting cards? Muestion. Okay again,

750
00:49:30,960 --> 00:49:34,400
Speaker 1: Like you two are so creative, right, I think we

751
00:49:34,480 --> 00:49:39,160
Speaker 1: should kill you and then transfer your consciousness. I'll do it.

752
00:49:39,239 --> 00:49:41,200
Speaker 1: I'll do it. You can have my my brain. Oh

753
00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 1: you don't want to come on, I'll do it. Honestly.

754
00:49:44,200 --> 00:49:45,919
Speaker 1: If you wanted one that's not the one to talk,

755
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:48,960
Speaker 1: I'll sign up. It's so good. Pay though, it's very good.

756
00:49:49,040 --> 00:49:51,880
Speaker 1: Pay yes, and then your consciousness will be in a

757
00:49:51,960 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 1: replicant and you'll live for I don't want to make

758
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 1: this weird, but did you see the Turkey series? He did?

759
00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:58,799
Speaker 1: It was pretty good. It was good. Trust me, I'm

760
00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:02,960
Speaker 1: worth it worth and Mr kurk, Mr Koko. We're losing

761
00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 1: the battle right now, all the all the replicants, they

762
00:50:05,200 --> 00:50:07,000
Speaker 1: seem to be just making these strange puns. That doesn't

763
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:09,279
Speaker 1: make any sense. They're not fighting fight. Would they do that?

764
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:11,240
Speaker 1: I don't know. It must be it must be whatever

765
00:50:11,320 --> 00:50:13,120
Speaker 1: the AI is. I'm not sure it was integrated into

766
00:50:13,160 --> 00:50:15,680
Speaker 1: the systems. I thought they were getting smarter. Let me

767
00:50:15,719 --> 00:50:22,120
Speaker 1: see here, okay, Tim Burger from greeting cards, greeting cards,

768
00:50:22,239 --> 00:50:25,879
Speaker 1: greeting cards, that's that's the mind that's inside all these AI. Yes,

769
00:50:26,520 --> 00:50:30,480
Speaker 1: that that's not a military mind, sir, that's it seems

770
00:50:30,480 --> 00:50:33,040
Speaker 1: to be a I made a deal with Tim Burger.

771
00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:36,600
Speaker 1: He you know, he volunteered to be killed and have

772
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:41,600
Speaker 1: his consciousness uploaded. And so yeah, okay, so we'll roll

773
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:43,520
Speaker 1: with it. We'll just roll. We're going to roll with

774
00:50:43,640 --> 00:50:46,120
Speaker 1: the god. If any of these replicans make it to Earth,

775
00:50:46,360 --> 00:50:48,840
Speaker 1: they will kill everyone. Do you understand. I'd like to

776
00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 1: welcome all the replicants now to the planet Earth. Let's

777
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:55,080
Speaker 1: start with you, sir. Did you have any questions? I

778
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:57,839
Speaker 1: have no questions. I'm ready to be here. Okay, let

779
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:01,480
Speaker 1: me out onto the planet. What would you do your

780
00:51:01,520 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 1: first day on Oh? Gosh, who said that? Nobody? I'm

781
00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:10,200
Speaker 1: so sorry for your loss. There are no words at

782
00:51:10,239 --> 00:51:13,720
Speaker 1: a time like this. Oh well, that's a lovely sentiment.

783
00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:17,800
Speaker 1: I mean, people are dying every day on Earth. This

784
00:51:18,040 --> 00:51:24,640
Speaker 1: all look at my butt? Huh. Okay, let us out. Um,

785
00:51:25,120 --> 00:51:26,879
Speaker 1: before we let you out, we just had a couple

786
00:51:26,920 --> 00:51:32,520
Speaker 1: of questions. Birth day more like girth day. Oh you're fat?

787
00:51:33,200 --> 00:51:36,640
Speaker 1: Oh oh, this is great. You guys know the whereabouts

788
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:39,480
Speaker 1: of Mr cut g Oh I've never heard of him.

789
00:51:40,000 --> 00:51:42,480
Speaker 1: Well we have, and we need to know his whereabouts.

790
00:51:42,520 --> 00:51:45,440
Speaker 1: And then we can release you onto the planet. I

791
00:51:45,520 --> 00:51:47,200
Speaker 1: don't know. We just need one of you to cough

792
00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:51,840
Speaker 1: up the information and we can get on. You're allowed

793
00:51:51,840 --> 00:51:54,160
Speaker 1: to do all the killing you want. We just need

794
00:51:54,200 --> 00:51:57,160
Speaker 1: to know where. Happy Thanksgiving to the whole family. Thank you.

795
00:51:57,760 --> 00:52:01,359
Speaker 1: That's very sweet. Speaking of thanks, I'm going to thank

796
00:52:01,400 --> 00:52:03,960
Speaker 1: you in advance for the information of Warmester cut going.

797
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:06,359
Speaker 1: If you open up this card, I think you'll find

798
00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:11,320
Speaker 1: ten bucks in it. Oh oh, there's not ten dollars

799
00:52:11,360 --> 00:52:19,560
Speaker 1: in it. There's there's just what's the sound of the bucks?

800
00:52:22,160 --> 00:52:26,919
Speaker 1: Their wookie bucks. Well, that's our show for today. Let's

801
00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 1: thank all of our start this. James Heney, Jimmy Jacko,

802
00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:33,000
Speaker 1: working folks, Trump find you on you web. They can

803
00:52:33,040 --> 00:52:35,560
Speaker 1: find me at the real James Heney dot com. Okay,

804
00:52:36,239 --> 00:52:40,040
Speaker 1: Vanessa Rackman. They can find me hanging around the Old

805
00:52:40,160 --> 00:52:45,080
Speaker 1: Dynasty typewriter or online at dynahs d Typewriter. Yeah great.

806
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:48,800
Speaker 1: Ka At Kikowski on Twitter see Kikowski on Instagram. And

807
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:52,800
Speaker 1: also Orange Ducks Improv for shows. Is there a specific

808
00:52:52,840 --> 00:52:57,680
Speaker 1: reason why the tux is orange? Um? It's the improv

809
00:52:57,800 --> 00:53:00,880
Speaker 1: group that is me and Carl is named after our

810
00:53:00,920 --> 00:53:02,840
Speaker 1: two deceased cats. One of whom was a tabby, and

811
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:08,160
Speaker 1: one of whom was a tuxedo cat. I always thought

812
00:53:08,200 --> 00:53:13,439
Speaker 1: it was a prison reference. Uh no, my mistake. Wow,

813
00:53:13,560 --> 00:53:19,000
Speaker 1: I'm really glad. I let's put you into an orange tuxedo. No,

814
00:53:19,239 --> 00:53:23,520
Speaker 1: that makes that makes perfect sense, James, let's talk out

815
00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:27,480
Speaker 1: for the show. Joey at jeby Grieber on Instagram. Why

816
00:53:28,600 --> 00:53:32,279
Speaker 1: it's not my name okay on Instagram. Yes, all right,

817
00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:37,280
Speaker 1: let's thank our engineer Doug Baby, our post on design

818
00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:44,320
Speaker 1: artist Raphael Britto, and of course Sophie Lichtman and the

819
00:53:44,360 --> 00:53:46,360
Speaker 1: finn folks that I heart media. I want to encourage

820
00:53:46,360 --> 00:53:48,280
Speaker 1: you all the right review, right review, write a review,

821
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:49,920
Speaker 1: write a review, write a review, write a review, and

822
00:53:49,960 --> 00:53:52,000
Speaker 1: tell everyone you've ever met, and write to us with

823
00:53:52,120 --> 00:53:54,120
Speaker 1: your scene suggestion at your name here and alchemy this

824
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Speaker 1: dot com. That's your name here at alchemy this dot com.

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Speaker 1: We greatly appreciate each and every damn one of you,

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Speaker 1: So please right to us and let us know what's

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Speaker 1: going on in your neck and the words. I'm Kevin Palk.

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Speaker 1: Until next time,