Speaker 1: Really Now, Really, really.
Speaker 2: Now, Really Hello and welcome to Really No Really with Jason,
Speaker 2: Alexander and Peter Tilden, who suggests that our listeners have
Speaker 2: engaged with us for quite a while, so maybe it's done.
Speaker 2: We tie the knot and make you a subscriber. But
Speaker 2: if we do tie the knot, unfortunately we may not
Speaker 2: have the bridesmaids we need for the wedding. So enter
Speaker 2: Jen Glance, the world's first professional bridesmaid and founder of
Speaker 2: the company Bridesmaid for Hire. She has worked hundreds of weddings,
Speaker 2: acting not only as a bridesmaid but also as a
Speaker 2: friend of the bride. In this episode of Really No Really,
Speaker 2: Jen discusses the reasons that someone would want to or
Speaker 2: need to rent a bridesmaid and how she transforms into
Speaker 2: that best friend no one has ever heard of or
Speaker 2: met before. You'll also discover the surprising origins of many
Speaker 2: wedding traditions, and Jason will.
Speaker 3: Reveal how the hokey pokey almost tanked a wedding Till
Speaker 3: death do they part. Here's Jason and Peter.
Speaker 4: I should I go public domain?
Speaker 1: God? Yes, what's a good? What's a good?
Speaker 4: Wedding? Public domain song? What's is there is there one?
Speaker 1: I don't know, but I'm gonna get you.
Speaker 5: In things that the question that was from that's an
Speaker 5: old light of rose.
Speaker 1: It's the left footed, isn't that? Isn't that? But the
Speaker 1: right foot?
Speaker 4: That's the hockey pokey?
Speaker 1: I know. Isn't that public domain?
Speaker 4: It's public domain because nobody.
Speaker 1: Wants people love that song doing the.
Speaker 4: You know what happened at my wedding. I brought it
Speaker 4: up for that reason?
Speaker 1: Story? Can you tell us?
Speaker 4: I can tell the story. Sure, we're going to be
Speaker 4: talking about weddings today, ladies and gentlemen. Yeah.
Speaker 5: My dear friend of mine from high school was U
Speaker 5: was the band.
Speaker 4: He had a band. He was a wedding band guy.
Speaker 5: And I asked him if he would play for my
Speaker 5: wedding and he was very excited to do so. I
Speaker 5: was very excited to have him. And I said, uh,
Speaker 5: there's one proviso, just one proviso. My mother in law
Speaker 5: does not want and she's serious about this. She does
Speaker 5: not want anyone to play the hokey pokey and that's
Speaker 5: the only.
Speaker 4: Thing she's asked. I'm gonna call him Dave right by
Speaker 4: the way.
Speaker 1: I love that she had the request that it bothers
Speaker 1: us so much that she thought ahead of time request.
Speaker 5: So I said to Dave, please, the only thing I
Speaker 5: ask you. You're the You're you're it, You're the band.
Speaker 5: You know this better than anybody. Just no hokey pokey.
Speaker 5: So in the middle of the wedding, everybody's on the
Speaker 5: dance floor. We're doing this dance and that dance and
Speaker 5: this dance. Everybody's having the best time. My mother in
Speaker 5: law is as close to me as you are right now.
Speaker 5: And we hear segway, da dad, you but your left
Speaker 5: butt in you But and my mother in law gives
Speaker 5: me a look like if she could shoot lasers through
Speaker 5: my head and explode my head, she would have done it,
Speaker 5: and turns and walks off the dance floor. And I'm
Speaker 5: in trouble. And I go to my friend after the
Speaker 5: set and I go Dave, Dave the hell man. One
Speaker 5: thing I said was, no hokey pokey, Why would you
Speaker 5: do that?
Speaker 4: Why would you do it?
Speaker 5: And with absolute sincerity, he said to me, Jay, the
Speaker 5: crowd wanted it.
Speaker 1: Did you ever explore it? Was there a traumatic event
Speaker 1: in your mother in law's life?
Speaker 5: I don't know, I don't know. I think my mother,
Speaker 5: you know, my mother in law. I know she's very strong,
Speaker 5: but I thought to.
Speaker 1: Myself, maybe at one point in her life, while she
Speaker 1: was doing the hockey.
Speaker 4: Somebody put their left foot and the wint the left.
Speaker 1: Foot went in. It was just something horrible, something went
Speaker 1: terribly around because to just think to say, no, yeah, wow.
Speaker 1: So we're having on a woman who's a professional bridesmaid,
Speaker 1: and and the really no really obviously is you can
Speaker 1: rent we rent professional bridesmaids. And the big really, why
Speaker 1: would And then we'll get to the point of why
Speaker 1: that would even be necessary.
Speaker 5: The only reason I can think of is the bride
Speaker 5: doesn't know another woman of any never met another woman.
Speaker 1: Well, we're going to find out. This is the woman
Speaker 1: who originated the rental thing, and she had thousands of
Speaker 1: people applying for the job of when she started expanding
Speaker 1: her business. But I mean, there's so many questions. One
Speaker 1: of them is you got to make up a story
Speaker 1: for the other brides maids. It's believable about who you are.
Speaker 1: So we'll talk about it. And she said stuff happened
Speaker 1: to her. But I thought I'd give you the origin
Speaker 1: of some wedding tradition, which is kind of interesting, is
Speaker 1: the hookeey poky and they started, isn't If I had
Speaker 1: thought about it, man, I would have loved to look
Speaker 1: up David Krugerheim will be looking at the army.
Speaker 4: Find out the author of the hookey poke.
Speaker 1: And if there are any other weddings where it was banned. Okay,
Speaker 1: anybody ever said, don't hooky poky me. Yeah. Centuries ago
Speaker 1: a groom had to kidnapped the bride of her family
Speaker 1: disapproved of their union. Best man was actually the best
Speaker 1: swordsman because he would standing guard. There's a whole lot.
Speaker 5: Of stuff that's it was also the best man was
Speaker 5: the best swordsman, and we've truncated it down to the
Speaker 5: best man.
Speaker 1: In fact, in ancient groups like the Huns of the
Speaker 1: Goths and the visit Goths with store weapons in the
Speaker 1: floor of the church, a lot of a lot of wedding.
Speaker 5: Again, that's well known about Visigoth churches. By the way, the.
Speaker 1: Bouquet was originally used for to mask the 's body.
Speaker 1: To mask it was also made in a hundred herbs,
Speaker 1: because remember in the fifteenth century medieval times, people didn't
Speaker 1: quite smell people. Forget that when you're watching these historical dramas,
Speaker 1: they weren't bathroom.
Speaker 5: You know, I've been to medieval timesheim and they smell.
Speaker 4: They got a smell.
Speaker 1: Veils, the wedding veil, wedding veil. Sure tell me you
Speaker 1: wanted to make sure that this wasn't called off prior
Speaker 1: to the wedding, so you get to see her after
Speaker 1: you say I do really comes up? Really not really, Yeah,
Speaker 1: bride's features only lifted after the ceremony. And then we
Speaker 1: have the brides. Maybe we should ask, oh, why they
Speaker 1: were white? By the way, Queen Victoria married Prince Albert
Speaker 1: in eighteen forty, all of the twelve bridesmaid were dressing
Speaker 1: identical white dresses to compliment her beautiful white seting. It
Speaker 1: was Victoria in her bridesmaids that started the creation of
Speaker 1: royal brides wearing white instead of silk in the way.
Speaker 5: Really and first of all, let me do the bell,
Speaker 5: and second of all, let me say so, while Queen
Speaker 5: Victoria was setting that trend, you're telling me people in
Speaker 5: Mesopotamia and.
Speaker 4: They all went ooh, you know what they're doing in England.
Speaker 4: We should do that.
Speaker 1: Apparently because it spread, didn't I white wedding rested spread
Speaker 1: obviously got the memo.
Speaker 5: Okay, I would like to know the sources of your information.
Speaker 4: I think you need to provide a bibliograph.
Speaker 1: If you look at if you look at the Victoria
Speaker 1: stre it's everywhere, it's every ask We'll ask our guests.
Speaker 1: If he knows the white wedding, he's not dare Why
Speaker 1: does she have to know?
Speaker 4: She's making a living, She doesn't need to.
Speaker 5: She's trying to remember the name of the woman she's
Speaker 5: being a bridesmaid.
Speaker 1: Did they know where white? Did they know where white?
Speaker 4: Of course she wore white.
Speaker 1: She got the memo.
Speaker 4: She didn't get the memo. She saw gone with the wind.
Speaker 1: But a lot of some someways, Laurie, can you come
Speaker 1: on for something some nights? Did you dress in white
Speaker 1: or did you do non traditional?
Speaker 6: I was in white for the first marriage, and the
Speaker 6: second one was more of a civil ceremony, so I
Speaker 6: was casual.
Speaker 5: Hancuffs, heuff, what a casual and white is not a
Speaker 5: casual color.
Speaker 6: No, I'm just saying casually dressed.
Speaker 1: What color?
Speaker 6: Probably jeans and a that's what I mean.
Speaker 5: Very Oh, this is not I mean wow cut offs
Speaker 5: and the shirt.
Speaker 4: Did you work under the car with Okay, yeah, casual.
Speaker 6: And that's been a problem. I have to say I
Speaker 6: should have done a better second.
Speaker 1: Wow, Now did you put the jeans in the top
Speaker 1: in a forever box?
Speaker 7: It's still at the dry cleaners?
Speaker 1: That I love that stuff when you go into somebody's
Speaker 1: fees and the cake is still there and they got
Speaker 1: this stuff in the forever box. I did I do?
Speaker 6: I did carry my original wedding dress in the trunk
Speaker 6: of my car for about two years.
Speaker 1: Wow. Yeah, but because you're going to put it in
Speaker 1: a keepsake prox and.
Speaker 7: You said screwed it something marriage isn't work.
Speaker 1: So maybe, oh, that's so funny. You kept it out
Speaker 1: just in case because I don't want. I don't want.
Speaker 5: This is as romantic as I think the profession of
Speaker 5: our guest today.
Speaker 1: Hiring a bridesmaid. Why why? We will find out who
Speaker 1: does and why and who thought of it and how?
Speaker 1: Because you are in chaos at that moment when you're
Speaker 1: doing the weddings are so high emotion.
Speaker 4: It is a little stress. Yeah, little stress, little stress.
Speaker 1: So the fact that she has to enter that every
Speaker 1: time and that's her business, yeah, chose chosen business. We
Speaker 1: will find out all about her.
Speaker 4: So, Hi, Jen Glands, how are you hello?
Speaker 7: I'm good. Thank you for having me today.
Speaker 5: So for people that don't know, I'm gonna I'm going
Speaker 5: to read your biou. You are the world's first, as
Speaker 5: far as we know, professional bridesmaid, founder of Bridesmaid for Hire,
Speaker 5: a best selling author, a blogger. You write several newsletters,
Speaker 5: and you host a podcast. Oh you're in our business.
Speaker 5: And you've done lots of morning shows about this thing
Speaker 5: that you do, which is it was fascinating. Basically you
Speaker 5: are a bridesmaid for hire, which made us go really, no, really.
Speaker 1: What brainstorm led you or desperation or inspiration led you
Speaker 1: to go, I'm going to do this. There's and there's
Speaker 1: an opportunity to do it. There's a need.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 8: I mean, I feel like so many people out there
Speaker 8: go to so many weddings, and I was one of
Speaker 8: those people. I was always the bridesmaid in my early twenties.
Speaker 8: And then people I was hardly friends with, like the
Speaker 8: kind of people who you talked to once a.
Speaker 7: Year, they asked me to be a bridesmaid.
Speaker 8: And that's when I thought, Okay, if I could do
Speaker 8: this for people I'm hardly friends with, why not do
Speaker 8: it for strangers. So I didn't know how to start
Speaker 8: a business. I posted an ad on Craigslist offering my
Speaker 8: services as a hired bridesmaid, and the ad got three
Speaker 8: hundred responses, and that's when I decided to kick off
Speaker 8: the business.
Speaker 1: That was the first How far back? How far back
Speaker 1: was that?
Speaker 8: Now this was a decade ago, so twenty fourteen, I
Speaker 8: launched the ad, launched the business, and officially started.
Speaker 1: What do you remember about that first wedding?
Speaker 8: Oh, it was terrifying. I got on a plane to
Speaker 8: Maple Grove, Minnesota. I got off the plane and I thought,
Speaker 8: what the heck am I about to do? I'm about
Speaker 8: to go to some stranger's wedding. And I went because
Speaker 8: she had fired her maid of honor the month before.
Speaker 8: And I go to this wedding. I have the best time.
Speaker 8: I'm pretending to be her best friend. And I got
Speaker 8: back on the airplane and I'm like, Okay, there is
Speaker 8: a business here, like there are people out there that
Speaker 8: genuinely need this, and I'm going to be that person
Speaker 8: to do it.
Speaker 5: So okay pretending to be I was there a moment
Speaker 5: when you're on the plane going I'm about to be
Speaker 5: kidnapped into a cult?
Speaker 4: Have I given people my address?
Speaker 8: And yeah, you got to be a little bit crazy
Speaker 8: to do this job, because you're sometimes like, I don't
Speaker 8: know who these people are. I don't ask them for
Speaker 8: their passport or social Security number, like they could be
Speaker 8: catfishing me, they could be kidnapping me.
Speaker 7: So yeah, you got to be a little restricted.
Speaker 1: So you went there, you said, best friend? Yeah, were
Speaker 1: there any other people in a bridal party?
Speaker 7: There wasn't.
Speaker 9: No.
Speaker 8: She had one made of honor that she had fired
Speaker 8: like a month before, and she had nobody else to turn.
Speaker 1: So how do you come up with the alibi story?
Speaker 1: So the people around there go, so, how do you
Speaker 1: know her? And you can actually pull that off? And
Speaker 1: are you always jen or do you have like some
Speaker 1: Oh my god god, yes.
Speaker 8: So the first so if you hired me, the first
Speaker 8: thing I'd say is, Okay, what part of your life
Speaker 8: won't be at the wedding? It's can I be a
Speaker 8: friend from high school, a friend from study abroad? Can
Speaker 8: I be a friend from the month you lived in
Speaker 8: New York City. I'll try to find out what is
Speaker 8: not going to be at your wedding, and then I
Speaker 8: will be that person. Sometimes I have a fake name,
Speaker 8: I'll change up the hair, I'll do whatever I have
Speaker 8: to do to blend into your life and never be
Speaker 8: gen Glands if that's what you want, and a lot
Speaker 8: of people want that.
Speaker 7: They don't want me, they want somebody else in their life.
Speaker 1: So you have to then animatedly talk to people and go, oh,
Speaker 1: I love her so many you know. The funniest thing
Speaker 1: about her, yeah, is when she does this. Joanne and
Speaker 1: I went to summer camp. We had a thing. We
Speaker 1: both love Bobby and so you have to come up
Speaker 1: with intricate stories because people want intricate stories.
Speaker 8: Yeah, but the thing is too at weddings, like, nobody's
Speaker 8: like questioning me as if I'm lying. They're like, how
Speaker 8: do you know the pride? I'm like yoga class. They're like, okay, great,
Speaker 8: where's the open bar? I mean they don't really.
Speaker 4: Care about you know, well that's me just about everyone.
Speaker 1: Although you did get bush I read it you had
Speaker 1: a mother in law who got picked off. You have
Speaker 1: been busted a couple of times.
Speaker 8: Yes, I've been closed where people found out but they
Speaker 8: didn't say anything. But yeah, a big part of the
Speaker 8: job is getting paid to be undercover, So a big
Speaker 8: part of the job is just trying to make sure
Speaker 8: no one's questioning me changing the subject, and that's really hard.
Speaker 4: Well, you've got to go back a step for me.
Speaker 5: Were what was your aspirations or training or education prior
Speaker 5: to this? Were you trying to be an actress? Were
Speaker 5: you trying because this is like an actress's gig. But
Speaker 5: where did you think you were aheaded before this left
Speaker 5: turn came up?
Speaker 8: No, I'm like, it's so funny because I'm so I'm
Speaker 8: like a little bit shy, and I'm a writer and
Speaker 8: I hate weddings. I still hate weddings, so I never
Speaker 8: thought that this would become my career path. But I've
Speaker 8: always had a passion for helping people, and weddings are
Speaker 8: a complete disaster. They're complicated, they're messy, and I feel
Speaker 8: like this is the perfect environment for me to help people.
Speaker 8: But no, I had no Like, I'm not even a
Speaker 8: good friend half the time to my real friends, so
Speaker 8: I have no background in doing this.
Speaker 7: I just stumbled into it.
Speaker 8: And then for the last ten years it's been my
Speaker 8: life and I've worked hundreds of weddings for the most fascinating.
Speaker 4: People and it's lucrative.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean you.
Speaker 8: Definitely get paid, Like I get paid anywhere from twenty
Speaker 8: five hundred up per wedding and sometimes close to ten
Speaker 8: thousand a wedding. They fly you out, they get you
Speaker 8: the ugly bridesmaid dress, they do it all, and it's
Speaker 8: enough money to really become a full time job.
Speaker 1: And how many do you how many are you doing
Speaker 1: a year at this point?
Speaker 8: When I first started, I was doing like fifty a year,
Speaker 8: but then whoa, I've popped out, Like I have some
Speaker 8: people who I've hired and fired to work for me
Speaker 8: and they'll do weddings with me or for me at
Speaker 8: this point, but I still do like a dozen or
Speaker 8: more a year for people myself.
Speaker 1: So the most memorable stuff, Yeah, what are some of
Speaker 1: the things you had to deal with that you didn't
Speaker 1: ever anticipate when you've got into the business.
Speaker 8: Weddings are not a fairy tale, They're not a rom com.
Speaker 8: They are like a nightmare. I've had people who have
Speaker 8: started fights. I've seen fires. I had a bride get
Speaker 8: blackout drunk and start screaming.
Speaker 7: I hate the groom. I hate this.
Speaker 8: I've had grooms go missing. I've had like everything you
Speaker 8: can think of, a cold feet. Just all of these things,
Speaker 8: they really do happen. It's just that when you're a
Speaker 8: guest at a wedding, you don't really see all.
Speaker 7: These things unfold.
Speaker 5: I'm guessing that a wedding couple that requires the services
Speaker 5: of a for higher bridesmaid, these things would have more
Speaker 5: of a preponderance of happening issues. You know, my wedding,
Speaker 5: I would you know a lot of things went wrong,
Speaker 5: but not this.
Speaker 1: You're right, you're fired. Firing the bridesmaid before you're firing
Speaker 1: a really good friend indicates trouble.
Speaker 5: I have been at funerals where the religious leader has
Speaker 5: never met the deceased, and they've been given a couple
Speaker 5: of little tidbits from the family, and they make up
Speaker 5: a eulogy like they were best friends. You now get
Speaker 5: up to give a speech a about your deep and
Speaker 5: long and satisfying relationship with Brenda. Where are you forgive
Speaker 5: me for being crass? How are you pulling this out
Speaker 5: of your ass? You forgive me for being crash? How
Speaker 5: are you pulling this out of your ass?
Speaker 8: You know I was a poetry major in college. You know,
Speaker 8: spend so much money with that major? And never put
Speaker 8: it to you. So I feel like Number one, that
Speaker 8: helps me a lot. Number Two, you've been to weddings,
Speaker 8: most of the speeches are the same. You share a
Speaker 8: couple of funny stories, you give them well wishes, you
Speaker 8: go off the stage.
Speaker 7: I mean, it's pretty.
Speaker 8: Basic things that you're saying, and then you just put
Speaker 8: in some flowery words. So yeah, these speeches are from
Speaker 8: the heart though in a way because I do get
Speaker 8: to know these people, I do build a friendship with
Speaker 8: these people.
Speaker 7: But then a lot of it's just standard stuff.
Speaker 1: Also, there's this thing of undermining the wedding where somebody's
Speaker 1: there who who has been harboring hostility and they get
Speaker 1: up and they're going to say something that's going to tank.
Speaker 1: How often does that happen?
Speaker 8: I Mean, the worst situation I've ever seen is that
Speaker 8: the person that the groom is having an affair with
Speaker 8: entered the wedding, came to the wedding, and the bribes
Speaker 8: saw this woman and that started a whole thing right there.
Speaker 7: So that was one of the weirdest things.
Speaker 5: That I've ever had, is that frowned upon is that?
Speaker 7: So that's real.
Speaker 8: But in speeches, the biggest mistake I see is you're right?
Speaker 8: People bring up oh you know this person was hooking
Speaker 8: up with everybody in college?
Speaker 7: Are they? They're saying things that are just so, and
Speaker 7: it's just.
Speaker 1: Stuff that that the group, the group didn't know.
Speaker 7: Yes, yes, and it's just like how did you think
Speaker 7: that was mentioned?
Speaker 8: Like the hot sea seed in Vegas, Like it's just somes.
Speaker 4: No vaccine canentuck.
Speaker 1: And you must be really good because after the sixty
Speaker 1: two guys she's been with. Wow, you did I read it?
Speaker 1: You said you've been bitten, You've been bidden, bribed? Were
Speaker 1: you bitten?
Speaker 7: I had, well, I had.
Speaker 8: I was bitten by a dog once and I had
Speaker 8: to walk a dog down the aisle before and like
Speaker 8: shepherd around a dog for a wedding. But I've dealt
Speaker 8: with everything from bodily fluids to fires. I've had to
Speaker 8: put out to fights to you know, every type of
Speaker 8: physical thing like that.
Speaker 1: Fights, you're breaking up a fight and then making sure
Speaker 1: they get married.
Speaker 8: Well, sometimes it's fights between guests or mothers of the
Speaker 8: bride and the groom or fighting. I mean, you see
Speaker 8: it all and again, these are things that happen at
Speaker 8: everyday weddings. It's just that sometimes you don't notice them.
Speaker 1: Wow, you do you?
Speaker 5: Does it ever strike you truly where it stays with
Speaker 5: you that it's kind of also a very sad situation.
Speaker 5: I mean, do you ever just go, oh, man, I
Speaker 5: this is more than I want to get involved with.
Speaker 8: And you know, I think the toughest part for me
Speaker 8: was realizing that not I always thought before this everyone
Speaker 8: was getting married because they were in love. But you
Speaker 8: start to realize that a lot of people don't get
Speaker 8: married for love. They get married for other reasons, or
Speaker 8: they get married for a version of love that's very
Speaker 8: different than what I thought love was.
Speaker 7: And I think that was the toughest part.
Speaker 8: You know, I've had people tell me I don't love him,
Speaker 8: but I'm thirty nine and I'm going to get married
Speaker 8: because I have no other options. I've had people tell
Speaker 8: me I'm flat out marrying him for the money. I've
Speaker 8: had people tell me, you know, I'm marrying him before
Speaker 8: all these different reasons, and there's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 8: I never judge anyone, but I think that was the
Speaker 8: toughest part to stomach, is that people are making these
Speaker 8: decisions in life.
Speaker 7: That they don't have to make. You know, they don't
Speaker 7: have to get married, but they think they do for reasons.
Speaker 1: Can you tell, having done so many weddings over this
Speaker 1: period of time, Yeah, can you tell who's going to
Speaker 1: stay together? And do you follow up to see if
Speaker 1: you're right?
Speaker 8: I do fall out to see and I've always found
Speaker 8: that I'm so wrong because there might be a couple
Speaker 8: who are fighting. I've had a couple screaming, cursing at
Speaker 8: each other at the wedding and they get married and
Speaker 8: they stay together for ten years, or they stay together
Speaker 8: forever because that's love to them. And then I've had
Speaker 8: couples that are I think, are so in love that
Speaker 8: don't make it a year. But I do think I've
Speaker 8: had everyone say who doesn't make it that inside when
Speaker 8: they're walking down.
Speaker 5: The well, Oh no, I'm gonna push back on that
Speaker 5: because of you.
Speaker 1: Why would you push who are you?
Speaker 5: Who are you gonna tell you ahead? So if you
Speaker 5: looked at my wedding album. Now, I married my wife
Speaker 5: when she was I was twenty two and Dana was
Speaker 5: twenty five, and we've been together for forty three years
Speaker 5: and we are more in love than we've ever been
Speaker 5: and I thank God for her every day. There is
Speaker 5: a photo of her walking down the aisle where it
Speaker 5: looks like a truck is bearing down. It looks she
Speaker 5: has fear and disgust and doubt in her eyes. That
Speaker 5: we laugh about it all the time, and if you
Speaker 5: saw that photograph, you'd go, this girl is not sure
Speaker 5: she wants to do this today. And that's the case.
Speaker 5: I don't know how this is gonna lie. And and
Speaker 5: she will admit in that moment as she was walking down,
Speaker 5: she went, what.
Speaker 1: Am I doing?
Speaker 4: What am I doing? This is not This man doesn't.
Speaker 5: Look like what I dreamed my friends Charmik would look like.
Speaker 4: I like him very much.
Speaker 5: I've only known him a year, and I had that
Speaker 5: I'm all in and I think he's a child.
Speaker 4: He's twenty two, I'm only twenty five.
Speaker 5: Everything that you could think about about this is not
Speaker 5: right was going through her head. And then this rabbi
Speaker 5: that we didn't know married us and referenced something from
Speaker 5: our lives that we couldn't believe he would have known.
Speaker 5: And we started giggling during the ceremony and we went okay,
Speaker 5: well okay, but I mean, if you had looked at
Speaker 5: that photograph, you would have thought this is not.
Speaker 1: So to that point, how many weddings have you done
Speaker 1: where it didn't get where it fell apart, and you
Speaker 1: no matter what you did, threatening, bribing, whatever it is,
Speaker 1: you couldn't get it together.
Speaker 7: I've had about five.
Speaker 8: I've had about five that on the wedding day, they
Speaker 8: completely had cool feet.
Speaker 7: They ended it on the wedding day.
Speaker 8: And you know, I mean, there's a lot that don't
Speaker 8: even make it to the wedding. I've hired to end
Speaker 8: engagements before the wedding has begun because they don't have
Speaker 8: friends to tell the truth too, so they'll hire me
Speaker 8: to help them end an engagement. I've had people back
Speaker 8: out on the day of the week of. But over
Speaker 8: the last ten years, the ones I followed up with,
Speaker 8: you know, maybe like thirty percent haven't made it in
Speaker 8: the course of ten years, which is relatively you know,
Speaker 8: normal for divorce rates and things like that.
Speaker 4: Five and ten years. That's not bad.
Speaker 1: Yeah, But I can't even imagine being there. Can you
Speaker 1: imagine sitting at the audience and you're waiting and it's exciting,
Speaker 1: and you're flew in with your cousin Lewis from Minnesota,
Speaker 1: and you're paid and you got the room and here's
Speaker 1: now we get the announcement er and Les decided best
Speaker 1: calling it off. And then what do you do? What
Speaker 1: do you do?
Speaker 5: And what you do is you go to the intended
Speaker 5: bride and you said, I'm going to have to change
Speaker 5: my flight.
Speaker 4: There could be up charge and expect you to cover that.
Speaker 1: By the way, are you the person that every guest
Speaker 1: then goes to and says, hey, I got a room,
Speaker 1: I'm paying for the school? Who has to answer all
Speaker 1: of those people's questions about what's going on here? I
Speaker 1: don't see them walking down the aisle.
Speaker 8: The thing is, of those five, the majority of them
Speaker 8: have decided right before that they're not going to legally
Speaker 8: get married. But they'll walk down the aisle, they'll have
Speaker 8: the pretend ceremony, and then they don't sign the marriage license,
Speaker 8: Like how would you know if they signed the marriage
Speaker 8: license or not?
Speaker 7: They just don't.
Speaker 8: Really yes, yes, yes, how would you know?
Speaker 7: You would have no idea?
Speaker 1: The gift registry at that point.
Speaker 7: Or they give it back.
Speaker 8: Is they paid for the wedding and it's all evened out,
Speaker 8: but sometimes they'll break up. If they won't tell guests
Speaker 8: for a year, you don't really know what's going on.
Speaker 8: In a lot of people's lives is what I've sort
Speaker 8: of seen. So next time you're in a wedding asked to
Speaker 8: see the marriage license.
Speaker 5: As long as you're a professional, only have a professional.
Speaker 5: I want to ask you this question so that everybody
Speaker 5: listening will know who's ever going.
Speaker 1: To be a bridesmaid?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 5: What are the list of things that a really good
Speaker 5: bridesmaid from from from the first moment you say yes
Speaker 5: till you're out the door.
Speaker 4: What's that list? What are their what's their job?
Speaker 8: The number one thing I would say is never say
Speaker 8: yes immediately because as a bridesmaid, it's not one size
Speaker 8: fits all.
Speaker 7: You don't know what you're getting yourself into.
Speaker 8: You might be asked to be a bridesmaid for a
Speaker 8: wedding and she might have all these expectations for you
Speaker 8: that you don't know about and you can't commit to.
Speaker 8: So if you're asked to be a bridesmaid, say thank
Speaker 8: you so much. I'd love to learn more about what
Speaker 8: you're expecting from me, because sometimes people are like, I
Speaker 8: want you to pay thirty five hundred for a bachelorette
Speaker 8: party and six hundred for a dress, and you have
Speaker 8: no money, so you can't do that and then it
Speaker 8: causes resentment. So before you even accept figure out what
Speaker 8: the expectations are as a bridesmaid. Again, set a budget
Speaker 8: for yourself so that you're not overspending. The average bridesmaid
Speaker 8: spends like fifteen hundred dollars a wedding, which is a
Speaker 8: lot of money, especially in your twenties. So that's one
Speaker 8: thing to think about. But if you want to be
Speaker 8: a good bridesmaid, aside from that, just be a really
Speaker 8: good friend. Check up on that person. Ask what you
Speaker 8: can do to help be there for them, give them
Speaker 8: a space to be honest with you.
Speaker 7: That's really all it takes is just being a supportive person.
Speaker 8: In my opinion, and I know this sounds crazy, I
Speaker 8: think bridesmaids are going to be extinct in the next decade.
Speaker 4: I think people are going to.
Speaker 8: Have less bridesmaids because they don't have a lot of
Speaker 8: friends or their friends can't be there for them. So
Speaker 8: I think that's a trend.
Speaker 4: Jen are you married?
Speaker 2: I am?
Speaker 7: I actually am married. How we did not have a wedding.
Speaker 8: We got married on the US outside of the coffee
Speaker 8: shop that we had our first date during the pandemic,
Speaker 8: and it was the best. We had no bridesmaids, we
Speaker 8: had no anything, and it was perfect for someone like me.
Speaker 4: So it was so seriously.
Speaker 5: So you you got married post your entrance into this field,
Speaker 5: and yeah, did you anticipate a different wedding prior to
Speaker 5: doing this work?
Speaker 8: You know, I was never the kind of person that
Speaker 8: dreamed of weddings or I just wanted to make sure
Speaker 8: I was marrying what I thought was the right person
Speaker 8: for me. And then when I started this business, my
Speaker 8: view of love just went downhill. And even when I
Speaker 8: met this person I'm married too, I was like, hey,
Speaker 8: I don't know how I feel about love and marriage
Speaker 8: and all of this. So he was very patient with that.
Speaker 8: But I couldn't figure out what to do for my
Speaker 8: wedding because I'd been to so many weddings and I
Speaker 8: have a weird perception of them. So we just decided
Speaker 8: a week before we got married to just get married
Speaker 8: outside at the coffee shop on the sidewalk in Manhattan.
Speaker 7: And yeah, we don't regret it.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 8: We saved a lot of money and it was perfect
Speaker 8: for I think what I needed out of a wedding.
Speaker 5: I surely think that's very how many women are working
Speaker 5: for you at this point.
Speaker 8: So that had over one hundred thousand apply to work
Speaker 8: for me, and I've only hired like about five on
Speaker 8: and off over the years, and it's a very big
Speaker 8: turnover rate. I feel like most people go to a
Speaker 8: couple weddings and then never want.
Speaker 7: To do it again.
Speaker 1: But a lot of people, a lot of.
Speaker 7: People want the job, but I don't think they understand
Speaker 7: the job.
Speaker 1: And your husband works with you still in the weddings,
Speaker 1: driving or doing something a lot.
Speaker 8: When I first met him, I was like, I have
Speaker 8: a job for you. You're going to be a groomsman
Speaker 8: for hire, and he was like, absolutely not. I want
Speaker 8: nothing to do with this world. But he'll often come
Speaker 8: with me to weddings, come at the end, like for
Speaker 8: the last hour or so, but he wants nothing to
Speaker 8: do with the business.
Speaker 1: Do you and he eats at the weddings? Are you
Speaker 1: allowed to eat?
Speaker 8: Yeah, well he'll come, he'll eat, he'll drink toward the
Speaker 8: end if he's allowed to.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, you can take take.
Speaker 3: Off possible care.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, I would make a play for myself. You
Speaker 1: take it home, you can eat after the week. Well,
Speaker 1: you really have a nervous breakdown in an airport, didn't you?
Speaker 8: Yeah, of course, I mean, how could you do this
Speaker 8: job and not have a couple of breakdown?
Speaker 1: Well, continued success and be safe. You should be.
Speaker 4: Looking for your poetry work as well. Anyway.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean I write nonfiction books. I have my
Speaker 8: book Always Surprised Me for hire. I have a blog
Speaker 8: called a Monday pick Me Up. And I'm just continuously
Speaker 8: writing real stories for real life.
Speaker 1: And how booked up?
Speaker 2: Ard?
Speaker 1: So let me call it now? How booked? Can they
Speaker 1: book you for next weekend?
Speaker 6: Uh?
Speaker 7: Not next weekend? But you can book me for the
Speaker 7: end of twenty twenty four, twenty twenty five, and you
Speaker 7: can't book me. You guys, you guys want to work
Speaker 7: for me? We could hire you on as well.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah absolutely. You know what if this if
Speaker 4: this thing doesn't work nextly, But it's the two of us.
Speaker 1: We got to be in the bridal party together.
Speaker 5: Unbelievable, Jen Happy. I would throw you my bouquet, but
Speaker 5: I'm saying thank you. There's a lot of things about
Speaker 5: weddings I don't that I just don't get. That's why
Speaker 5: when she said we got married in front of the
Speaker 5: coffee shop where we met, Because.
Speaker 1: I didn't, and I'm the guy. We didn't have a
Speaker 1: nice traditional but it's small, and that was it because
Speaker 1: I didn't want that either. I don't like all that
Speaker 1: ump and circumstance because it doesn't mean anything. Right.
Speaker 4: So and I say to Dana, hey, should we renew
Speaker 4: our vowels? And she goes, I will put a nice
Speaker 4: pick through your head, and by the way, i'll.
Speaker 1: Put it my spick in your head because I don't
Speaker 1: want to go to anybody's vow I'll tell you what.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what. I'll tell you. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'll forget. Yeah, I'll tell you why. Because we love
Speaker 1: each other more than you guys love each other. We're
Speaker 1: renewing it. That's the imply up yours. We're more in love.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Good, Have you have your vower for me? It's your
Speaker 1: insecure I mean.
Speaker 4: All the gifts I didn't get the first time.
Speaker 3: I know what I want?
Speaker 1: A registry? What a registry?
Speaker 4: Who told people this.
Speaker 1: Is what we want? I like when friends have that,
Speaker 1: and it's more expensive than crap i'd buy for myself.
Speaker 1: And you who are you to have a register?
Speaker 4: But you you live like a lowis my friend? About
Speaker 4: the quality of this French.
Speaker 1: Starting now you're going to use me to upscale your life.
Speaker 1: You would don't have a slow cooker.
Speaker 3: Why would you have?
Speaker 1: I saw the ball and I bought.
Speaker 8: It for me.
Speaker 1: Viewers. And then the other thing, the other thing I
Speaker 1: love more than anything is when they make people trap
Speaker 1: and let me know how it went.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you're paying for the ticket in the hotel.
Speaker 9: Google the hockey pokey, the hockey pokey, Well, this actually
Speaker 9: might be your mother in law's issue. There was some
Speaker 9: controversy related to the hockey Pokey. Some felt that this
Speaker 9: song was originally composed to mock a Catholic math.
Speaker 1: I don't know if she was faker.
Speaker 3: I don't know. That actually is not true.
Speaker 9: The Hokey Pokey goes way back, with some saying that
Speaker 9: there were different versions of it and then it was
Speaker 9: written by a guy named Jimmy Kennedy in nineteen forty two.
Speaker 4: Jimmy Kennedy, Yes, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: Originally there it was the hockey cokey.
Speaker 9: It was a hockey In fact, the United States, Canada,
Speaker 9: and Ireland we are hockey pokey places, but the rest
Speaker 9: of the world is hokey cokey, hokey cokey, and and
Speaker 9: most interestingly, Laurie actually has a wedding story.
Speaker 1: From here we go, Laurie, Laurie, do we have her
Speaker 1: music right?
Speaker 7: Wait?
Speaker 8: Wait?
Speaker 1: Wait wait? Have we loaded in her intro music yet?
Speaker 6: Now I'll use David's interesting.
Speaker 1: What's her intro music?
Speaker 4: Whatever it is, I don't know why to say.
Speaker 9: I have to say it makes no difference anyway. Whatever
Speaker 9: it is, I'm against it.
Speaker 2: Learn about it or who commenced it?
Speaker 9: I'm again.
Speaker 6: But you were talking about when you walk down the aisle.
Speaker 6: Then my first marriage, I met a guy a month
Speaker 6: before my wedding. Oh boy, I really liked him, and
Speaker 6: I invited him to the wedding. And as I was
Speaker 6: walking down the aisle, I wanted to cancel my wedding,
Speaker 6: but my nana had flown in from there you go.
Speaker 6: And I went through with the wedding for that and
Speaker 6: then dated the guy after I divorced my husband and
Speaker 6: then and did that work out? It didn't, but it was,
Speaker 6: it was It was lovely.
Speaker 4: Did he know that you were thinking of him while
Speaker 4: whilst you were walking down?
Speaker 1: Hew? He But Laura, That's why I asked, because anybody
Speaker 1: who's been divorced, My theory has always been. You know
Speaker 1: when you're standing there, he is wrong, you know, and
Speaker 1: you do it for all these reasons, either guilt or
Speaker 1: like you said the Nana that it was just it's
Speaker 1: exactly right that people go through because they're guilt. And
Speaker 1: then how long did it last? The first wedding? The
Speaker 1: first five years, all right? And then how long did
Speaker 1: the two years? By the way, did you get did
Speaker 1: you wear gans when you were dating the author? Didn't
Speaker 1: you address? Though? I love Lauri on whatever is clean
Speaker 1: in the closet, figure out whatever smelled. And by the way,
Speaker 1: do you know that the origin of the wedding dress,
Speaker 1: way before the wedding dress, do you know what the
Speaker 1: bride used to wear? Alarm, anything that was anything that
Speaker 1: was clean. There's from their clients, from their closet. They
Speaker 1: didn't buy its dress and stuff. Yeah, no, they did not,
Speaker 1: way back in Rome ancient one. They're not going I'm
Speaker 1: going to twenty three whatever, They're always seventeen or you
Speaker 1: always fifty eight or whatever. Ad Oh, that's really funny. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you, ebody.
Speaker 5: If you're out there in age, have a wonderful wedding,
Speaker 5: enjoy your friends, enjoy your married life.
Speaker 4: I think marriage is wonderful. I've been blessed, and we
Speaker 4: don't have.
Speaker 1: We don't have.
Speaker 4: I'm talking about myself.
Speaker 1: Which is usually what happened this relationship. This relation just
Speaker 1: has not been about. This has been a thirty plus
Speaker 1: year marriage.
Speaker 5: Come on, it has And I'd like to go out
Speaker 5: on this note your left hand, but you left then
Speaker 5: that but you left. You do the hokey pokey, and
Speaker 5: you do.
Speaker 1: You don't have any more morning.
Speaker 4: That's love ball talk.
Speaker 1: Don't even more like when you sing it with enthusiasm,
Speaker 1: that's when you're selling it.
Speaker 8: You do the.
Speaker 4: That's what That's what it's all about.
Speaker 1: I might as well take a piece of cake and
Speaker 1: you put it in the boss.
Speaker 4: Like, what are you thinking about that?
Speaker 1: It's nonsense.
Speaker 4: That's not the hockey pokey you can do.
Speaker 1: No, that's the kekey part, all right. And then there's
Speaker 1: alsho pokey, which is the seafood bird.
Speaker 2: Come me in pompa No really as another episode, it
Speaker 2: really really comes to it glows. I know you're wondering
Speaker 2: what were some of the most expensive weddings ever? Well,
Speaker 2: get ready to have your mind blown to First, let's
Speaker 2: thank our guest, Jen Glance. You can follow Jen on Instagram,
Speaker 2: x and YouTube where she is at jen Glance, and
Speaker 2: her website where you can book a bridesmaid is Bridesmaid for.
Speaker 3: Hire dot com.
Speaker 2: Our little show hangs out on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and
Speaker 2: threads at really No Really podcast and of course you
Speaker 2: can share your thoughts and feedback with us online at
Speaker 2: reallynoreally dot com. If you have a really some amazing
Speaker 2: fact or story that boggles your mind, share it with
Speaker 2: us and if we use it, we will send you
Speaker 2: a little gift.
Speaker 3: Nothing life changing, obviously, but it's the thought that counts.
Speaker 2: Check out our full episodes on YouTube, hit that subscribe
Speaker 2: button and take that bell. So here updated when we
Speaker 2: release new videos an episode, which we do each Tuesday,
Speaker 2: So listen and follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple
Speaker 2: Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Really and now,
Speaker 2: about those weddings, just how expensive could they be? And
Speaker 2: keep in mind the average cost of a wedding in
Speaker 2: America is between forty and fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 3: So here's the top five. Number five Prince William and
Speaker 3: Kate Middleton.
Speaker 2: Knowing that Kate's gown cost a cool four hundred thousand
Speaker 2: and the Kate cost eighty thousand and ten times that
Speaker 2: amount was spent on flowers. Would it shock you to
Speaker 2: learn that the bill came in at thirty four million
Speaker 2: and twenty eleven, which is thirty seven million today. Number
Speaker 2: four the daughter of a billionaire steel magnate and a
Speaker 2: wealthy banker, Venetia Mattal and Aniss Battia flew guests in
Speaker 2: and housed them at a five star Paris hotel. Then
Speaker 2: their ceremony was held in a sixteenth century chateau and
Speaker 2: the Palace of Versailles. Lavish viffets, fireworks at the Eiffel
Speaker 2: Tower and gift bags filled with jewels and gems drove
Speaker 2: the price to sixty million in two thousand and five.
Speaker 3: Or eighty million today.
Speaker 2: Number three Lady Diana Spencer and Prince Charles in nineteen
Speaker 2: eighty one. Their lavish televised international event cost a mere
Speaker 2: forty eight million, but if adjusted for today, it would
Speaker 2: come in at one hundred and sixty six million, So.
Speaker 3: William and Kate were frugal by comparison.
Speaker 2: Number two Sheik Mohammad bin Zayed al Nayan and Princess Salama.
Speaker 2: This seven day event for the Crown Prince of Dubai
Speaker 2: and his bride required a stadium to be built from
Speaker 2: scratch to accommodate the guests. In nineteen eighty one, the
Speaker 2: bill was forty five million. Adjusted for today, they'd be
Speaker 2: looking at one hundred and fifty five million. And number
Speaker 2: one the wedding of a Soviet oil tycoon and his
Speaker 2: bride Kadya Uzakovs and said goutseraev. Photos of this wedding
Speaker 2: include huge catering halls with thousands of scandals, wall to wallflowers,
Speaker 2: a Godzilla sized wedding cake, and performances by Jennifer Lopez,
Speaker 2: Enrique Iglesias, and Sting.
Speaker 3: The exact cost of the wedding is not known, but
Speaker 3: experts have placed.
Speaker 2: The cost at approximately one billion dollars.
Speaker 3: That's a billion with a be.
Speaker 2: You know, they say money can't buy happiness, but apparently
Speaker 2: it can buy one big, freaking happy day. And I'm
Speaker 2: willing to bet that these couples had no trouble finding
Speaker 2: bridesmaids for a small portion of their budget. I'd have
Speaker 2: thrown on a gall and gone myself. Really, no, really
Speaker 2: is the production of iHeartRadio and Blase Entertainment