WEBVTT - Leaving a Hoop Behind 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:05.160 How I Suck Dating with de Jared Haven and I 0:00:05.280 --> 0:00:11.360 Heard Radio podcast. All right, everyone, welcome to an all 0:00:11.360 --> 0:00:14.600 new episode of Help I Suck at Dating? As always, 0:00:14.800 --> 0:00:18.000 Dean Anglert here with Jared have been all the way 0:00:18.040 --> 0:00:19.840 across the street in Los Angeles. But we have a 0:00:19.920 --> 0:00:22.680 very special co host with us this week. You know her, 0:00:22.720 --> 0:00:25.760 you love her, You've seen her on your TV. Alexis 0:00:25.760 --> 0:00:28.840 Waters will be co hosting with us this entire episode. 0:00:29.280 --> 0:00:33.640 As she's ripping shots across amigos over there too. Um So, 0:00:33.760 --> 0:00:36.680 Alexis just off air explained to us that she was 0:00:36.760 --> 0:00:40.280 drinking for her in Ravens podcast, which if you haven't 0:00:40.360 --> 0:00:42.800 listened to that one yet, it's called Girls Night, be 0:00:42.840 --> 0:00:46.440 sure to check that one out. Yeah, we're gonna plug 0:00:46.479 --> 0:00:48.040 that probably a few more times throughout the course this 0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:53.760 podcast obviously. Um So, for the listeners out there, if 0:00:53.760 --> 0:00:56.160 you hear Alexis getting a little saucy, it's because she's 0:00:56.200 --> 0:01:01.279 probably already like seven shots in. I really can I'm 0:01:01.320 --> 0:01:05.399 going to after this? So are you serious? Yeah? I 0:01:05.400 --> 0:01:08.400 can do it. All You drink and then work out 0:01:08.440 --> 0:01:11.160 you were a t I haveed well the gym. I 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:13.480 think it's about to close. So I'm gonna I need 0:01:13.520 --> 0:01:20.679 to get my last one end. Like they're shutting, their shutting, 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:22.880 the gym's down again. But you're not like in a 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:24.880 rush you get out of here anything, are you? Oh no, 0:01:25.600 --> 0:01:28.559 you guys have a hundred percent Alexis right now, So 0:01:29.920 --> 0:01:32.800 come at me like, like I said, just feel pret 0:01:32.880 --> 0:01:34.560 to take as many shots as you want throughout the 0:01:34.680 --> 0:01:37.480 entire episode. But Alexis, we haven't heard from me in 0:01:37.520 --> 0:01:39.080 a while, you know, like you like we said, you 0:01:39.120 --> 0:01:41.800 have your own podcast with Raven over there, but billists 0:01:41.840 --> 0:01:45.720 in on what's going on over in hoop Nation. Okay, 0:01:45.760 --> 0:01:51.920 so hoop Nation has been still active, but obviously not 0:01:52.120 --> 0:01:57.080 as crazy right now because of everything that's going on. 0:01:57.120 --> 0:02:00.560 But I am blessed that I still have my company 0:02:00.760 --> 0:02:04.240 and like everything, but it's been slow. So the podcast 0:02:04.360 --> 0:02:07.960 is actually so helpful because it's getting it's basically me 0:02:08.000 --> 0:02:11.000 and we're even having a therapy session talking about Adam 0:02:11.040 --> 0:02:15.880 and Tyler. So it's good to like because when quarantine 0:02:15.960 --> 0:02:17.360 is really bad, we were able to go to the 0:02:17.400 --> 0:02:22.320 studio still, so it's like we can go like out 0:02:22.360 --> 0:02:23.880 of the house like and we were able to go 0:02:24.040 --> 0:02:27.360 twice a week, so like, thank God for that. But 0:02:27.480 --> 0:02:31.880 other than that, I've been just drinking tequila and kidding. 0:02:32.480 --> 0:02:35.440 Sounds good. When did you start? When did you start 0:02:35.520 --> 0:02:40.200 dating Tyler? I met him through one of the girls 0:02:40.880 --> 0:02:43.919 on next season. We actually had a while on our 0:02:43.960 --> 0:02:49.399 episode today. Shout out to neck favorite anonymous email. Yes, 0:02:49.919 --> 0:02:53.080 he's a big fan to help us second dating? Are 0:02:53.120 --> 0:03:00.799 you guys being sarcastic? Hey? Nick? Um? We called him 0:03:00.840 --> 0:03:03.200 today and we said that he's our favorite ex boyfriend. 0:03:03.200 --> 0:03:04.960 He really is my favorite ex boy friend now that 0:03:05.000 --> 0:03:06.960 I think about it. He's a good ex boyfriend to have. 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:11.280 He'll always give you a great advice. Hey, Ashley, Sorry, 0:03:11.320 --> 0:03:14.680 actually just walking in the background. This is what happens 0:03:14.720 --> 0:03:17.280 when you record podcasts at home. Your significant others just 0:03:17.280 --> 0:03:20.040 walk in the background, which is totally fine. Um. Well, 0:03:20.320 --> 0:03:21.880 the reason I asked so, I want to know how 0:03:21.880 --> 0:03:23.639 long he guys have been dating because I'm curious did 0:03:23.680 --> 0:03:26.440 you start dating like right before Quarantine? And I'm just 0:03:26.440 --> 0:03:28.480 curious about like the effect that Quarantine has had a 0:03:28.520 --> 0:03:32.760 new relationship. No, they'd been dating for like never dating 0:03:32.800 --> 0:03:35.240 for like two and a half years. Oh Jesus, I 0:03:35.920 --> 0:03:41.520 longer than that, right, Well, we met prior to paradise 0:03:42.440 --> 0:03:45.760 and then I was going on paradise but like I 0:03:45.800 --> 0:03:49.440 was banging him, but like, I like, what am I 0:03:49.480 --> 0:03:54.800 supposed to do? Like not cool? Right, So everybody was 0:03:54.880 --> 0:03:57.680 like and I was also twenty three. I was like, 0:03:57.880 --> 0:04:00.200 I don't know if I like like like him, don't 0:04:00.200 --> 0:04:02.680 even remember like having sex with in the first four times, 0:04:03.120 --> 0:04:09.320 So sorry, Tyler, he doesn't. No, I tell him that 0:04:09.320 --> 0:04:11.720 every like every day, I'm like, I don't remember having 0:04:11.720 --> 0:04:13.560 sex with like the first four times, so it's just 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:17.200 like blackout. But yeah, so then I went on paradise. 0:04:17.240 --> 0:04:24.320 I realized I like didn't like anybody, sorry Dean and no, 0:04:25.240 --> 0:04:31.120 but I just and then we just kept booming and 0:04:31.160 --> 0:04:34.599 then now we're in love. That's awesome. Do you think 0:04:34.920 --> 0:04:39.720 quarantine has strengthened your relationship, made your relationship a little 0:04:39.920 --> 0:04:42.840 bit more stressful, or has not affected it at all? 0:04:43.520 --> 0:04:45.960 I feel like if he answered this question, it didn't 0:04:45.960 --> 0:04:50.680 affect us at all because he is never starts fights. 0:04:51.200 --> 0:04:56.240 I'm a psychopath and very dramatic, so when I'll just 0:04:56.279 --> 0:05:00.520 be bored and like I'll just like like a fight 0:05:01.200 --> 0:05:04.920 for no reason. But he was an example. What's last 0:05:04.920 --> 0:05:07.640 thing you guys thought about? Oh, we just want today, 0:05:08.040 --> 0:05:10.239 like literally five minutes because he says that I'm leaving 0:05:10.279 --> 0:05:13.200 my sneakers by the door and like I should put 0:05:13.240 --> 0:05:16.920 them away, and I was like, I read an article 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:21.200 that like if COVID can transfer from sneakers and then 0:05:21.200 --> 0:05:24.599 that just stuck in my head or like shoes, So 0:05:25.480 --> 0:05:26.960 I just leave him by the doors when I want 0:05:26.960 --> 0:05:29.400 to bring him like to the bedroom, and he's like, 0:05:30.120 --> 0:05:31.960 can you like put your shoes away? And I was 0:05:32.000 --> 0:05:35.520 just like I snapped though, like I have a ah. 0:05:35.600 --> 0:05:37.479 But he loves it, like if I didn't have if 0:05:37.560 --> 0:05:39.919 he didn't have me, I'm very entertaining. If if he 0:05:39.920 --> 0:05:41.880 didn't have me, he would be so bored with his life. 0:05:41.920 --> 0:05:47.400 Always does play like watch golf and play golf. I mean, 0:05:47.440 --> 0:05:52.280 I feel like we'd become best friends already just opposite, 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:57.480 but it works and I always do uh Dean's videos 0:05:57.520 --> 0:06:03.279 of Kalen I have single one because Tyler is very 0:06:03.680 --> 0:06:08.279 he's very business smart, like he's amazing, but common sense. 0:06:09.360 --> 0:06:11.640 I'm not saying Kilan has no common sense, but Tyler 0:06:11.720 --> 0:06:18.040 has no common sense. He's not that smart amazing business 0:06:18.160 --> 0:06:22.960 like literally is has some money. That's why I'm with him. 0:06:22.960 --> 0:06:28.960 But um, I'm kidding, O kidding, but I always do 0:06:29.080 --> 0:06:32.200 the questions that you ask Caitlin, and he falls from 0:06:32.200 --> 0:06:34.880 every single time. It's amazing. I know I need to 0:06:35.000 --> 0:06:36.719 we need to like stockpile a bunch of those so 0:06:36.760 --> 0:06:38.719 we can start knock them all out. I know I 0:06:38.760 --> 0:06:40.800 need to copy, I need some new ones, so come on, 0:06:40.920 --> 0:06:45.800 help me out. But I think for Quarantine, I mean, 0:06:45.880 --> 0:06:47.839 it has its good days and bad days. Some days 0:06:47.880 --> 0:06:49.680 I love him, some days I hate him. But I 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:52.239 feel like he always loves May, which is all that matters. 0:06:53.080 --> 0:06:54.680 I've got a question for you about the golf thing. 0:06:54.720 --> 0:06:57.760 Have you ever wanted to play golf with him? Yeah? 0:06:57.760 --> 0:07:00.320 We did play golf together and cose Strika and I 0:07:00.520 --> 0:07:03.919 literally have the worst ad so I can't do the 0:07:03.960 --> 0:07:10.840 whole eighteen. I can only do nine and went and drink. Yeah, 0:07:11.160 --> 0:07:14.720 but I'm I'm pretty good. I asked that because I 0:07:14.800 --> 0:07:17.040 golf a lot as well, and Kitlin's always well, not always, 0:07:17.080 --> 0:07:20.320 but uh. There have been talks of getting her on 0:07:20.400 --> 0:07:21.840 the golf course and like teaching her how to play 0:07:21.880 --> 0:07:24.480 golf and stuff. But I figured it's just one of 0:07:24.520 --> 0:07:25.800 those things where if you don't enjoy it by now, 0:07:25.840 --> 0:07:27.560 you're probably not gonna enjoy it. So I figured if 0:07:27.560 --> 0:07:30.680 Tyler is always playing golf, like it might encourage you 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:32.320 to get out there and like, like you said, drive 0:07:32.400 --> 0:07:34.880 the card around, maybe doing the club a couple of times. No, 0:07:35.000 --> 0:07:38.040 I like when he goes, so then I have the 0:07:38.080 --> 0:07:41.560 house to myself, you know, like Tomorrow's birthday and I 0:07:41.600 --> 0:07:43.920 was gonna set up like this whole thing at the house. 0:07:43.920 --> 0:07:45.280 And he's like, well, I'm gonna go play golf, and 0:07:45.280 --> 0:07:49.880 I'm like, yes, what are you gonna do for him? 0:07:49.920 --> 0:07:52.360 I don't know, probably throw out Monterrey and make some mistake. 0:07:56.640 --> 0:07:59.520 What is it? What do they call him? A strip called? 0:07:59.560 --> 0:08:03.080 It's like legs and eggs. That's what I'm doing. I'm 0:08:03.080 --> 0:08:06.080 gonna make him nice seak because I learned to cook 0:08:06.160 --> 0:08:12.360 during quarantine and just when he walks in have lingreal. 0:08:12.480 --> 0:08:14.920 But then he would have to shower after golf. So 0:08:15.400 --> 0:08:17.560 what am I going to do in the meantime, just 0:08:17.560 --> 0:08:22.280 just going on the shower with him? It's his birthday, Yeah, 0:08:22.680 --> 0:08:24.600 but I'll be like old doll d up in my 0:08:24.680 --> 0:08:27.520 lingerie already true true, true, And you don't want to 0:08:27.520 --> 0:08:30.360 get your all messed up. I want to look good, 0:08:31.880 --> 0:08:34.480 So we'll say. But yeah, I know, he's just a 0:08:34.640 --> 0:08:40.800 very chill, simple man, like good, good kind man, doesn't 0:08:40.840 --> 0:08:43.640 talk a lot. So well, let's talk about this. So 0:08:43.920 --> 0:08:45.360 it's been two and a half years you guys have 0:08:45.440 --> 0:08:48.760 been dating, right, Where the heck is the engagement ring? 0:08:50.559 --> 0:08:53.000 All I care about our hoops right now? I can't 0:08:53.000 --> 0:08:56.120 even think about an engagement ring, sorry, the engagement hoops. 0:08:56.120 --> 0:08:57.840 Then I guess I should say, yeah, I'll take an 0:08:57.840 --> 0:09:02.560 engagement hoop, but not an engagement ring. But I mean, 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:07.200 we'll see or even thinks it was going to happen 0:09:07.600 --> 0:09:12.200 if quarantine didn't happen. But I'm just like, he's also 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:16.400 lucky because I'm only twenty six and I still have 0:09:16.559 --> 0:09:19.680 some time. I feel like, right right, your biological clock 0:09:19.720 --> 0:09:22.000 has given you a few extra years here, plenty of time. 0:09:22.440 --> 0:09:27.040 And I'm just like, I just I am so focused 0:09:27.040 --> 0:09:31.640 on hoot Nation and just like my personal finances, like 0:09:31.679 --> 0:09:35.400 I want to be so financially stable when I get engaged. 0:09:35.440 --> 0:09:40.760 I don't know what how that comes across, but I 0:09:40.840 --> 0:09:45.400 just want to be secure in myself before I get engaged. 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:48.400 So what was I thinking going on, Nick Filesyson? Because 0:09:48.440 --> 0:09:52.760 I was like literally just got out of college. I 0:09:52.800 --> 0:09:55.160 mean you were thinking what we were all thinking, take 0:09:55.320 --> 0:09:58.920 take advantage of the opportunity. So I just was like, okay, 0:09:59.000 --> 0:10:00.880 I just was going with the wow, like I mean, 0:10:00.960 --> 0:10:03.959 if it happens, it happens, it doesn't doesn't. Do you think, 0:10:04.120 --> 0:10:06.440 like looking back on your season of Nick, do you 0:10:06.480 --> 0:10:10.040 think that you were like actually developing feelings for him 0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:13.960 one time? I did my vagina dance once. I actually 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:16.920 told him on the podcast my vagina dance one time. 0:10:16.960 --> 0:10:18.280 But I think it was just because he was the 0:10:18.320 --> 0:10:21.520 only guy there that I could make out with. And 0:10:21.559 --> 0:10:25.240 then he made like some jokes. I told you, I 0:10:25.280 --> 0:10:27.839 think Jared, I told you this. He made some jokes 0:10:27.840 --> 0:10:30.000 and I was just like, yeah, I don't know. I 0:10:30.000 --> 0:10:33.280 don't know about this. I got to hear the jokes. 0:10:33.280 --> 0:10:35.920 What are these jokes? Do you remember the joke at all? Oh? 0:10:36.080 --> 0:10:38.840 It literally there was two of them he made, and 0:10:38.880 --> 0:10:40.920 I was just like, Yeah, this isn't gonna work because 0:10:40.960 --> 0:10:43.000 humor is a big thing for me. Even humor is 0:10:43.040 --> 0:10:45.079 a big thing for me, even though Tyler literally is 0:10:45.080 --> 0:10:50.480 not funny at all. But um see, I feel like 0:10:50.520 --> 0:10:52.600 you need I feel like Tyler from the way you're 0:10:52.600 --> 0:10:54.560 describing him, is perfect for you because he seems like 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:57.800 quiet and stable and you just like you throw the 0:10:57.880 --> 0:10:59.719 kitchen sink at him. But that's what you guys. You 0:10:59.760 --> 0:11:02.120 bound to each other off so well. Yeah, and he 0:11:02.120 --> 0:11:04.280 helps me with business very well, Like he helps me 0:11:04.320 --> 0:11:06.520 with my business. He like puts me in my place. 0:11:07.600 --> 0:11:11.280 He's a good person for me because you have each 0:11:11.320 --> 0:11:13.480 other out. Yeah, while you did that for him, you 0:11:13.520 --> 0:11:15.400 bring like the fun side out of him, which is 0:11:15.400 --> 0:11:19.320 something that he needs. Yeah. Probably, I don't know when 0:11:19.320 --> 0:11:22.720 he gets fun because it's very rare when he drinks 0:11:22.720 --> 0:11:24.760 the Costa and he goes with you. Yeah, No, he 0:11:24.880 --> 0:11:29.000 drinks the Costa a zul which is like so expensive. 0:11:29.080 --> 0:11:34.640 I'm like, he's so bluegie, I can't. I'm like super 0:11:34.640 --> 0:11:37.960 expensive too. I mean it's not cheap, it's not cheap, 0:11:38.000 --> 0:11:41.800 but the Costa Zula bottle is like, I think, like 0:11:41.880 --> 0:11:46.120 fifty dollars. I remember that. The first time I ever 0:11:46.440 --> 0:11:49.760 got like, um, like a booth at a club, we 0:11:49.760 --> 0:11:51.880 were in Vegas and it was our first Vegas trip. 0:11:51.920 --> 0:11:54.600 So we paid for a booth and we're like, we'll 0:11:54.840 --> 0:11:56.800 we'll pay a bottle, like we'll buy a bottle, will 0:11:56.800 --> 0:11:58.960 split it will be fine and then they give you 0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:01.360 the menu when you're at the club and like the 0:12:01.440 --> 0:12:05.240 cheapest bottle is like Tita's for seven fifty dollars, and 0:12:05.240 --> 0:12:09.040 you're like, wow, this was the biggest mistake of my life. Now, 0:12:09.720 --> 0:12:11.720 like you could have literally brought a bottle Tinos and 0:12:11.720 --> 0:12:15.040 brought it to the club. No, it's so crazy. Anyway, 0:12:15.160 --> 0:12:17.280 that's just reminded me of the story. Um, but we 0:12:17.320 --> 0:12:20.079 have a great podcast coming up. We obviously have Alexis 0:12:20.080 --> 0:12:22.000 and Alexis, you're gonna stick around for the entire thing. 0:12:22.760 --> 0:12:24.760 Thank you for doing that. We appreciate it. We also 0:12:24.800 --> 0:12:27.160 have Tracy McMillan coming up. She's been on the podcast 0:12:27.200 --> 0:12:29.920 before and she is on once again. She is the 0:12:30.000 --> 0:12:33.199 host of Family or Fiance, which airs on the Oprah 0:12:33.240 --> 0:12:36.800 Winfrey Network every Saturday night. We're gonna also answer some 0:12:36.960 --> 0:12:40.920 emails later, one of which is from anonymous a k A. 0:12:41.040 --> 0:12:44.439 Nick by All. Thank you Nick. Uh, So make sure 0:12:44.440 --> 0:12:47.640 you stay tuned. But before we get into Tracy, let's 0:12:47.640 --> 0:13:00.680 take a little break al right, everybody, do you welcome 0:13:00.760 --> 0:13:04.160 back to help I suck at dating? Uh? We have 0:13:04.200 --> 0:13:06.720 a very special guest. You guys have heard from her before. 0:13:07.440 --> 0:13:10.760 Tracy McMillan. Ladies and gentlemen, Tracy, how are you? I 0:13:10.760 --> 0:13:14.680 am great, How are you guys? We're doing good. Thanks 0:13:14.679 --> 0:13:17.040 for coming back. Remind us the last time we saw you. 0:13:17.800 --> 0:13:19.960 I think we saw each other in February, But that 0:13:20.040 --> 0:13:23.400 was like that other year that It's like in that 0:13:23.679 --> 0:13:26.560 movie Being John Malkovich. There was like the seven and 0:13:26.559 --> 0:13:30.319 a half floor. That's what the first part of this 0:13:30.400 --> 0:13:33.080 year was. It was like this three month thing that 0:13:33.120 --> 0:13:36.800 would happened in the middle, you know. And and so 0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:38.960 since we saw you last and correct me if I'm wrong, 0:13:39.000 --> 0:13:41.400 But you have this new show Family or Fiance coming 0:13:41.400 --> 0:13:44.400 out right? Um, but I have the show then too, 0:13:44.800 --> 0:13:46.360 Oh you did have it then? Okay, I don't remember 0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:48.880 talking about it then. And now we're back with more 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:52.840 new episodes every Saturday night on the network. And so 0:13:52.880 --> 0:13:56.040 are these like real episodes? Are these the quarantine version 0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:59.640 of the episode? Real episodes? But our show is basically 0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:02.520 Core Team. We take a couple who wants to get 0:14:02.559 --> 0:14:05.320 married and their families who are against it, and move 0:14:05.360 --> 0:14:08.360 them all into a house and keep them there until 0:14:08.400 --> 0:14:12.160 they work it out or not or or break the engagement, 0:14:13.000 --> 0:14:16.640 whichever comes first, right right or the entanglement, I guess 0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:18.640 is that which has the been the buzzword lady, the 0:14:18.679 --> 0:14:21.560 thing let's I mean, entanglement is the word of the day. 0:14:21.880 --> 0:14:23.920 You know, Well, let's talk about entanglement a little bit. 0:14:23.960 --> 0:14:27.400 What do you think it means? Well, I think an 0:14:27.520 --> 0:14:30.640 entanglement it's great. I mean in a way, it's like 0:14:30.880 --> 0:14:35.120 anything that two people can negotiate is fine, and no 0:14:35.160 --> 0:14:37.200 one can say what two people have been married for 0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:41.360 twenty years should negotiate. It's like a healthy relationship is 0:14:41.400 --> 0:14:45.800 all about stating needs and then negotiating how to meet 0:14:45.840 --> 0:14:49.320 those needs with the two partners. And the more creative 0:14:49.360 --> 0:14:52.040 you can get and the more the better it is. 0:14:52.240 --> 0:14:54.880 And when people leave relationships, it's because they have needs 0:14:54.880 --> 0:14:58.400 that are not getting met. So I feel like if 0:14:58.400 --> 0:15:01.840 they came up with a way to make it great. 0:15:01.880 --> 0:15:04.720 So are we using the word entanglement as a buzzword 0:15:04.800 --> 0:15:07.400 for an open relationship? Like let's say Caitlin and I 0:15:07.480 --> 0:15:11.640 start having an open relationship. My other endeavors have become entanglements. 0:15:11.680 --> 0:15:14.200 Is that what the entanglement? No, because I think the 0:15:14.320 --> 0:15:18.240 entanglement is more about the relationship with August than it 0:15:18.320 --> 0:15:20.200 is about the relationship with Will. Do you know what 0:15:20.480 --> 0:15:23.320 I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, it's like the third party. It 0:15:23.400 --> 0:15:26.280 may or may not be open, who knows, but the 0:15:26.440 --> 0:15:31.920 entanglements definitely happening. I want to hear your thoughts on this. Yeah, 0:15:32.040 --> 0:15:34.800 I don't think that the entanglement. I don't think they 0:15:34.840 --> 0:15:36.920 have an well, I don't really know what happened with 0:15:36.960 --> 0:15:40.840 the whole August thing. I didn't understand the entanglement either, 0:15:42.000 --> 0:15:44.800 But I like how Bill called her out and was like, 0:15:44.840 --> 0:15:48.280 what does an entanglement mean? He's like, so, but they 0:15:48.280 --> 0:15:51.600 were separated, so it was basically a relationship. They were 0:15:51.640 --> 0:15:54.960 separated at the time. But I mean, I don't know. 0:15:55.000 --> 0:15:57.800 I'll let you know when I even get engaged. I'm 0:15:57.800 --> 0:16:01.560 not even at twenty five years marriage. So I think 0:16:01.600 --> 0:16:04.800 part of it is that she chose someone who is 0:16:04.880 --> 0:16:08.440 not necessarily going to be like a marriage partner. He's 0:16:08.480 --> 0:16:12.480 twenty years younger than her, And it feels like the 0:16:12.600 --> 0:16:14.760 part of the reason they call it an entanglement is 0:16:14.800 --> 0:16:18.880 because it's not really gonna go anywhere in the traditional 0:16:18.960 --> 0:16:22.040 sense of most relationships, Like it would be unusual for 0:16:22.080 --> 0:16:25.160 somebody to leave their husband for somebody twenty years younger, 0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:30.200 so that an affair. I mean it is, except for 0:16:30.240 --> 0:16:33.160 the fact that the complication, the reason we need a 0:16:33.160 --> 0:16:36.680 new word is that technically she's married. But I think 0:16:36.680 --> 0:16:41.120 what they're saying is everyone's in agreement with it. There's 0:16:41.160 --> 0:16:48.200 no secret. Well, I mean well and how we're got 0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:52.720 had well on her had issues, they had separated, and 0:16:52.760 --> 0:16:55.120 then that's when she went into the entanglement with him, 0:16:55.640 --> 0:17:00.920 and then he left her. August left her And Okay, 0:17:00.400 --> 0:17:02.680 so this is my first time doing a little bit 0:17:02.680 --> 0:17:04.680 of digging on this whole thing, and the very first 0:17:04.720 --> 0:17:08.160 headline that pops up is August says, he's still absolutely 0:17:08.200 --> 0:17:11.920 in love with you. Yeah, but I think August brooke 0:17:12.119 --> 0:17:15.320 up with with her, Which that makes sense because I 0:17:15.400 --> 0:17:19.800 see so much of of dating is driven by mating, right, 0:17:19.920 --> 0:17:22.320 So mating is the purpose of getting together for the 0:17:22.359 --> 0:17:25.439 purpose of kids or the purpose of building like a 0:17:25.520 --> 0:17:29.560 family system. Dating is the process that gets you to mating. 0:17:30.119 --> 0:17:34.840 So if you're twenty seven, your your objectives and dating, 0:17:35.119 --> 0:17:37.560 eventually he's going to get to mating in a way 0:17:37.600 --> 0:17:41.600 that that a forty something your old woman who already 0:17:41.600 --> 0:17:45.040 has two grown children, doesn't you know that's gonna They're 0:17:45.359 --> 0:17:47.439 They're not they don't have the same goals. Put it 0:17:47.560 --> 0:17:50.920 like that, and you saw that with um Demi Moore 0:17:51.119 --> 0:17:54.280 and Ashton Kutcher. It was like that was very easy 0:17:54.280 --> 0:17:57.119 to predict that it was gonna work for him until 0:17:57.160 --> 0:18:00.359 he wanted to mate, and then he's gonna pick somebody 0:18:00.640 --> 0:18:03.840 who is his own age and have children with that person. Yeah, 0:18:03.880 --> 0:18:06.800 but don't you think that's a completely different situation just 0:18:06.880 --> 0:18:09.400 because Ashton Kitcher and Demi Moore got married, like their 0:18:09.400 --> 0:18:12.800 goals were aligned for a while, and if if Ashton 0:18:12.920 --> 0:18:14.560 wanted to have kids with Demi and Demi didn't want 0:18:14.560 --> 0:18:16.200 to have kids, that should have been a conversation well 0:18:16.240 --> 0:18:18.880 before getting married. I feel like the whole Jada Pickett, 0:18:18.960 --> 0:18:23.600 their goals were aligned, like we're going to Florida and 0:18:23.680 --> 0:18:26.359 you're but you're gonna get up in Chicago, do you 0:18:26.359 --> 0:18:28.960 know what I mean? Like we're heading south, but that 0:18:29.000 --> 0:18:32.320 doesn't mean that we are. Goals are aligned for a minute, 0:18:32.359 --> 0:18:35.399 and then they're going to dig rate, which is very predictable. Yeah, 0:18:35.480 --> 0:18:38.200 but I feel like if your goals aren't in line, 0:18:38.240 --> 0:18:40.440 don't get married. Like this Jada Pickett Smith thing, the 0:18:40.440 --> 0:18:44.399 whole entanglement, I don't know, it just feels like this long, 0:18:44.600 --> 0:18:48.280 convoluted way of just saying she was separated from Will 0:18:48.320 --> 0:18:52.080 and slept with a younger guy. Yeah, that's basically what 0:18:52.160 --> 0:18:55.320 it is. I don't understand, Like I guess there's because 0:18:55.320 --> 0:18:58.240 I've heard this like entanglement and all these discussions about 0:18:58.240 --> 0:19:00.240 what's right, who is on the right, who is wrong, 0:19:00.280 --> 0:19:02.920 so on and so forth, and it's like, I feel 0:19:02.960 --> 0:19:05.280 like we're just making a mountain out of a mole hill, 0:19:05.560 --> 0:19:09.879 where like they were just separated and she felt like 0:19:10.040 --> 0:19:13.119 she needed to explore something else and she kind of 0:19:13.160 --> 0:19:15.280 just got maybe caught up in the moment. And then 0:19:15.320 --> 0:19:18.200 now it's being called this entanglement. And and my I 0:19:18.240 --> 0:19:20.440 guess my question for you, Tracy, because you said earlier 0:19:20.520 --> 0:19:23.159 like we need a new term for this? Why do 0:19:23.200 --> 0:19:24.640 we Why do you think we need a new term 0:19:24.680 --> 0:19:29.480 for it? Because I think that there's probably more layers 0:19:29.560 --> 0:19:34.480 than um. I think there's more layers going on, and 0:19:34.840 --> 0:19:38.400 so when you are because I feel like my sense 0:19:38.520 --> 0:19:42.000 is she's not leaving her marriage. No, they're like the 0:19:42.000 --> 0:19:47.040 partners exactly. Yeah, but she jeopardized it. That's why I 0:19:47.160 --> 0:19:50.560 called an entanglement, because she's not I'm not leaving this guy. 0:19:50.760 --> 0:19:53.640 I never was going to leave this guy. But it's 0:19:53.760 --> 0:19:57.040 not exactly the sense like an affair in the sense 0:19:57.040 --> 0:19:59.880 where I fell in love with, you know, someone at 0:20:00.000 --> 0:20:02.359 work and now we're like trying to figure out how 0:20:02.400 --> 0:20:04.480 to be together, or I'm just gonna keep her as 0:20:04.480 --> 0:20:07.840 a side piece. See, it's not a side piece. I 0:20:07.840 --> 0:20:10.480 gotta I have to, I I gotta, I gotta fight 0:20:10.520 --> 0:20:15.160 back against that because like her saying I don't want 0:20:15.160 --> 0:20:18.040 to leave Will, that's not up to her anymore. Like 0:20:18.080 --> 0:20:19.919 she's the one who slept with somebody else. Now, I 0:20:19.960 --> 0:20:22.359 feel like it's up to Will whether he wants to 0:20:22.359 --> 0:20:27.680 continue being married. You want to make a bad believe her. No, 0:20:27.680 --> 0:20:30.040 no, no no, I'm not saying he will or won't. That's 0:20:30.080 --> 0:20:32.520 that's besides my point, whether he does leave her or 0:20:32.560 --> 0:20:38.560 doesn't leave her. My point being like there us trying 0:20:38.560 --> 0:20:40.760 to say that there's a difference between an entanglement and 0:20:40.800 --> 0:20:43.280 an affair is because Jada had no intention of leaving. 0:20:43.400 --> 0:20:47.040 Leaving Will is kind of out the window because like 0:20:47.320 --> 0:20:51.160 just say, like Ashley and I separate, uh, and then 0:20:51.200 --> 0:20:53.560 I sleep with someone else, and then I come back 0:20:53.600 --> 0:20:54.959 and I say, actually no, no, no no, no, no, no, 0:20:54.960 --> 0:20:57.159 no no, This is not in an affair, It's an entanglement. 0:20:57.200 --> 0:20:59.760 I had no intentions of leaving you. You guys would 0:20:59.760 --> 0:21:02.919 say you, Jared, you slept with another girl. That's not 0:21:03.000 --> 0:21:04.720 up to you anymore. That's up to Ashley, and I 0:21:04.720 --> 0:21:07.359 feel like in this moment, it's up to Will. I 0:21:07.400 --> 0:21:10.359 feel like we have missing information here. My sense is 0:21:10.400 --> 0:21:14.199 that whatever they're calling a separation is I don't. I 0:21:14.240 --> 0:21:16.600 almost feel like the world put that on there. I 0:21:16.640 --> 0:21:18.919 feel like they have an agreement. These two people are 0:21:19.000 --> 0:21:22.160 very conscious about what they do in every way, Like 0:21:22.200 --> 0:21:25.199 if you watch Red Table Talk, there's nothing messy. She 0:21:25.240 --> 0:21:28.119 didn't like slip and fall into something. I think that 0:21:28.160 --> 0:21:30.720 they make decisions, And of course I don't know, but 0:21:30.800 --> 0:21:33.800 I'm just gonna say there's a lot of intentionality and 0:21:33.840 --> 0:21:36.040 the way both of them moved through the world, and 0:21:36.080 --> 0:21:38.119 so I'm gonna guess that the reason she's calling it 0:21:38.160 --> 0:21:41.199 an entanglement is because there's an It's okay, there's an 0:21:41.280 --> 0:21:44.480 intention there, and the whole way we conceive of marriage 0:21:44.520 --> 0:21:47.040 is not the way they conceive of it. Well, And also, 0:21:47.160 --> 0:21:50.000 wasn't the show like prerecorded too? So didn't they film it? 0:21:50.040 --> 0:21:51.920 And then they Jada was like, yeah, let's here this 0:21:52.320 --> 0:21:55.800 sure right, Like they've made the conscious decision to let 0:21:55.800 --> 0:21:57.600 the world know what was going on. Yeah, I feel 0:21:57.640 --> 0:22:00.640 like there's more to the story. Like sometimes I used 0:22:00.640 --> 0:22:03.199 to work in TV news for sixteen years and there 0:22:03.200 --> 0:22:07.360 are certain stories where like we're missing some backs. But 0:22:07.359 --> 0:22:12.240 we also said he was done with her asks before 0:22:12.800 --> 0:22:17.760 her in August had their entanglement, So I mean it's 0:22:17.960 --> 0:22:20.439 very I feel like it's they just have an open 0:22:20.480 --> 0:22:23.840