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Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode of Alchemist, and your guests

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Speaker 1: both threatened in for KP for quite a while. I'm

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Speaker 1: sorry to let's meet everybody, Shelly. First up is James. James,

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Speaker 1: you played D D you a little bit. Do you

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Speaker 1: have a favorite character you've created? I haven't played enough

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Speaker 1: to have a favorite character that I've created. Um God,

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Speaker 1: I feel embarrassed to say that I've only played D

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Speaker 1: and D maybe five times my whole life. But I

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Speaker 1: read D and D books, I learned the rules. But

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Speaker 1: nobody will play with me. Joey, It's true. I've probably

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Speaker 1: every time I've played D and D has either been

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Speaker 1: with Joey or with you, Cole, which I think was

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Speaker 1: only once. Probably right, I feel like you didn't pandemic times.

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Speaker 1: You could probably play a lot of like things online. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I bought Ultimate licenses to have people join me, and

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Speaker 1: nobody wants to play D and D with me. Well,

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Speaker 1: I want to play a game, It's it's not D

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Speaker 1: and D. I'm actually kind of against D and D.

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Speaker 1: I mean to call Kulu, I mean to Fate, I

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Speaker 1: meant Savage Worlds, But D n D is so basic.

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Speaker 1: You've never played it. You've never you know, talking about man.

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Speaker 1: This is how the podcast is gonna get it the

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Speaker 1: most type mail. All right, well he he went to

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Speaker 1: I mean number one, here's who's next, Chris Alvarado. Chris,

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Speaker 1: you could be fluent in another language that you already aren't.

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Speaker 1: What would it be? My dad speak Spanish is his

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Speaker 1: first language. All my cousins and all my uncles, everybody

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Speaker 1: from Honduras, that's my family. And I can't speak it.

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Speaker 1: And I've tried. I'm taking classes. I went to Peru,

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Speaker 1: I did immersion stuff. I just don't think, you know what.

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Speaker 1: I have a theory. Everybody. You know how I can't

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Speaker 1: do accents very well. I think it's the same part

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Speaker 1: of your brain that might know languages. I mean this

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Speaker 1: because I'm a pretty good actor. Actually, I'm a really

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Speaker 1: good actor, and I'm a funny coming in and I

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Speaker 1: do great improv and yet I know what an accent

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Speaker 1: sounds like, and I can't do it. I also can't

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Speaker 1: sing very well, and I can't speak Spanish. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean, gosh, thanks. It's kind of like one of

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Speaker 1: those things that like you kind of wish when you

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Speaker 1: were a kid, that your parents introduced to you, Like

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Speaker 1: I can't play any instruments, but I kind of wish

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Speaker 1: I had learned when I was little, because you could

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Speaker 1: pick it up a lot easier when you're older. Actually

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Speaker 1: that's not true. That's not true, and I will fuck you. Joe.

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Speaker 1: Are you saying that you could learn a new instrument

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Speaker 1: as an adult? Quicker? Yes, no quicker? Maybe the baby. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know a lot of babies that shred on the

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Speaker 1: guitar guys. All right, well I'm not introducing you yet, Joey.

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Speaker 1: So a two little things. Uh, if you could go

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Speaker 1: on a joyride to space like that idiot bezos did?

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Speaker 1: What two slebs or millionaires would you take with you? Oh?

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Speaker 1: That's good, two sleps or millionaires? So everybody here is

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Speaker 1: out because you're not millinars millionaires. Um well that's good.

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Speaker 1: That's good, old man, that's tough. Um. So somebody who

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Speaker 1: I would want to chat with, Somebody I can talk to,

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Speaker 1: not somebody I'm star stuck by, because that would be

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Speaker 1: because I would go to athlete right away. But then

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Speaker 1: I don't have to. Uh maybe Lebron James. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I watch that HBO show called The Shop, and I

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Speaker 1: kind of want to be there too, Um, no reason

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Speaker 1: to be there, But maybe it'll be interesting to have

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Speaker 1: a conversation with him and somebody from the past. I

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Speaker 1: don't know, maybe like an like a painter or like

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Speaker 1: an artist, you know, like create a salon, create a

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Speaker 1: salon on the spaceship, a good conversation, and when we

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Speaker 1: come back. The space travel is actually the smaller part

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Speaker 1: of what I've learned. I would love to have, like

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Speaker 1: Van go freaking the funk out of Uh, Craig Koski, everybody, Craig.

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Speaker 1: Is there a movie that you felt totally bait and

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Speaker 1: switched by from the trailer then when you actually saw

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Speaker 1: the film? M hmmm, because now trailers just tell you

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Speaker 1: the entire sequential story of the movie, so like it's uh,

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Speaker 1: it's not a thing anymore. And I kind of avoid

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Speaker 1: trailers now for that reason, Like if something has the

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Speaker 1: pedigree where I want to see it, like I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: see I don't need to see the trailer. Uh, And

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm not going in person to Uh. I'm stalling

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Speaker 1: for time, is what I'm doing. I feel like the

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Speaker 1: trailer for that question, UM gave me a false impression

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Speaker 1: of where we were headed with it, which is why

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Speaker 1: I've answered incorrectly. I feel like it started. It started

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Speaker 1: with Twister when there was that like tire that hits

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Speaker 1: the windshield or the tower or whatever that wasn't in

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Speaker 1: the movie. Um. I think I felt personally dating switched

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Speaker 1: by Pan's Labyrinth Orridge late because the trailer was like,

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Speaker 1: look at this wonderful fantasy world, and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: it's like adult Labyrinth, and that's like twenty minutes of

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Speaker 1: the movie and the rest of stark and depressing start

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Speaker 1: depressing civil war movie. So yeah, the god yeah, pretty

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Speaker 1: faked up. All right, I guess we can introduce him now.

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Speaker 1: Joey Greer is here. Guys, Joey, I hear that Campbell's

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Speaker 1: has asked you to come up with a super special

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Speaker 1: new kind of soup. Tell us about it. Wait, it's Campbell's. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's who hired you. That's what I heard. Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I thought it was cannibals. Oh my god, Holy sh it.

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Speaker 1: Do not eat any of the soups I've said, any

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Speaker 1: of you. Please, for the love of God, do not

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Speaker 1: ingest any of those soups. Crag Chu, chunky meat. I'm

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Speaker 1: not supposed to. That was delicious. Stop eating. It's none

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Speaker 1: of us would ever eat anything you gave us, So

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Speaker 1: I think it's okay. I know, let's do a damn

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Speaker 1: show alley. All of our scenes suggestions are gathered from listeners, emails,

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Speaker 1: or from our Patreon v I p s to become

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Speaker 1: a Patreon supporter of the show and enjoy exclusive content

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Speaker 1: and other perks, just head on over to Patreon dot

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Speaker 1: com slash alchemy this. You'd like to submit a scene

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Speaker 1: suggestion via email, please write to the podcast at our

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Speaker 1: new email address, Alchemy this email at gmail dot com.

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Speaker 1: That's Alchemy dot com. Scene one is from Patreon alchemaniac

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Speaker 1: Nicholas Makauer, who wrote, Hello, keV rev Heifer, how are

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Speaker 1: you just thinking of the A T crew makes me grateful?

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Speaker 1: The world kneels in praise. I'm, of course talking about

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Speaker 1: the inventors of the at sign, who we all owe

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Speaker 1: so much to. Anyhow, here's my suggestion. Tired of being

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Speaker 1: over or underwhelming, learned to whelm like a pro in

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Speaker 1: just ten days ten bucks. Say you won't choose that one, Nicholas,

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Speaker 1: We just made ten bucks. Guys. Hell, okay, just sign

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Speaker 1: up here all right to be getting your lanyard and

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Speaker 1: a nice toe bag with some goodies in there, and

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Speaker 1: they'll have your room information inside. Oh wow, what's what's

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Speaker 1: in the toe? We got some granola bars? We do

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Speaker 1: have some some some room temp water water? Did I

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Speaker 1: just get a quick diagnosis? Am I right now? Am

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Speaker 1: I overwhelming? Or underwhelming? That that you are overwhelming in this?

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Speaker 1: I thought so? I thought so, I'm too much. Seminars

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Speaker 1: gonna fix that. It fix it for me too. I'm believing.

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Speaker 1: I'll take you over here. What's your name, please, Richard?

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Speaker 1: Last name Richard, Richard, Richard, Richard? Here you are great?

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Speaker 1: Here's your lanyard? Holy sh it? Is that dick? Dick? Hey, buddy,

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Speaker 1: what are you doing here? Huh? I just you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm just trying to get my well my wellm up?

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, trying to bring mine down. Is there an

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Speaker 1: open bar? What's what's the dealer under? I don't I

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Speaker 1: don't know. There's a toe back? Sir? What's your my name? Righty?

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Speaker 1: My name is Wayne Parmesan, William Parmer, Jean. Here your wire,

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Speaker 1: here's your lanyard. To now, gentlemen, there will be an

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Speaker 1: introduction in cocktail hour at four thirty in the lobby

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Speaker 1: and then we're gonna jump right into our first lecture. Um.

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Speaker 1: He will be here, obviously, and we look forward to

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Speaker 1: your to your wellness. Thank you. I appreciate I appreciate

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Speaker 1: everything you've done for me right now, Richard, Richard, I

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Speaker 1: used to be just like you. No, I couldn't stay.

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Speaker 1: It just was too it was too much going on.

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Speaker 1: I came home early. I think it's not for me.

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Speaker 1: I think this is just the amount of well I have. Honey,

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Speaker 1: You're the only way you're gonna get better is if

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Speaker 1: you make a commitment. You made a commitment. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I got up to the line and then there was

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Speaker 1: another person and I was embarrassed, and I just had

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Speaker 1: to leave. I can't do it. You know what, Why

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Speaker 1: don't you take my ticket? I don't know if these

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Speaker 1: are transferable. Oh sure, sure they are. And you're in

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Speaker 1: a good starting spot. You could either get more whelming

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Speaker 1: or less whelming. I I can't. I can't. You wanted

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Speaker 1: to do this, this is your person. I wanted you

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Speaker 1: said it right. I wanted to past tense. I can't.

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Speaker 1: I'm not leaving the house. I'm gonna go into the

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Speaker 1: bedroom and I'm gonna stay there. Don't cry. Don't cry.

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Speaker 1: I'm going upstairs. Hello, Hey, you doing Are you the homeowner?

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Speaker 1: We're not interested whatever it is, buddy, I'm not selling anything.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna let you know you got termites in there. Man.

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Speaker 1: These are termites with human thumbs. All right, these are

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Speaker 1: dangerous animals, my old guy. All right, you gonna okay, sir.

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Speaker 1: I see you're having your tea and I know you're

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Speaker 1: in the middle of a meditation. I just want to

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Speaker 1: go over todays schedule with you now. Um. We sold

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Speaker 1: a record number tickets, so congratulations to you, sir. UM.

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Speaker 1: They are currently in the cocktail hour light cocktail hour,

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Speaker 1: and then UM, I wanted to go over lecture number one, Sir.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to contradict you or what you have

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Speaker 1: set up here, but are you sure that that we

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Speaker 1: should start this weekend with um? I am me you

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Speaker 1: are not. Is that? Is that the way you wanted

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Speaker 1: to start this weekend? Sir understood? We will keep it

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Speaker 1: there and we will delutely Dylan Dylan, he's still in

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Speaker 1: the middle of his meditation. I think it's best if

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Speaker 1: we just comes out of his media. It's just that

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Speaker 1: the hotel staff needs to know when to bring the

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Speaker 1: hot food. Maybe the hotel staff has been a little

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Speaker 1: overwhelmed you d Do you think that could be the case, Yes, Martha,

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Speaker 1: I definitely do. Actually, why don't you take time in

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Speaker 1: the reactor. He's just sitting on stage. He hasn't said

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Speaker 1: anything in twenty six minutes. What the funk up with this?

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Speaker 1: Granola tastes like ship? Glad somebody said something because this

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Speaker 1: is not a good granola bar. Alright, alright, this is

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Speaker 1: how you doing? Wayne Parmesan? What's your name? All right?

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Speaker 1: Charlie Macava, Charlie maccume. How are you doing? Man? He

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Speaker 1: looks great? You look great? Is overwhelming? Right over what

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Speaker 1: he's opening his eyes, he's opening his eyes. What room

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Speaker 1: are you in? I'm in forty two b Holy god,

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Speaker 1: you got you got a nice Yeah, I'm in the

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Speaker 1: I'm in the sea wing. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, good things. Yeah. Okay,

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Speaker 1: and I'm glad to see everyone's here for professional Well mate,

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Speaker 1: now it's the first day, and let's be honest. I

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Speaker 1: am me and you are not, Dylan. We got all

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Speaker 1: the hot food ready, can we just enter with the

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Speaker 1: hot food? Killing? Tell me something? We have hot food.

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Speaker 1: Everyone is holding looking and I'm looking at Okay, I think,

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Speaker 1: and he said we are not go go go go

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Speaker 1: go team one go flank left, team one go flank left. Uh, Martha,

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Speaker 1: I hate it. You're not wearing any clothes. Yeah, because

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Speaker 1: your barge ins in my room. I'm sorry. I thought

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Speaker 1: we were enter without knocking and then it just came

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Speaker 1: in here. So how somehow I'm I'm at fault. No,

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Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm comfortable with my body. There's no shame

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Speaker 1: in this. I'm not looking. I'm just looking down at

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Speaker 1: the schedule. I've covered myself up. You are not went

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Speaker 1: very well. We actually have to um two super sign

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Speaker 1: ups from that. I know you wanted to get more

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Speaker 1: than that, but we do have two supers and they

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Speaker 1: are in for each Dylan. I also looked at your

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Speaker 1: whelm chart and it seems that you are becoming overwhelmed

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Speaker 1: the times and underwhelmed as well. And then I was

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Speaker 1: looking at your reactor time and you're not logging your hours.

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Speaker 1: I meant to well, I'm meant to do more reacting.

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Speaker 1: It's just at the staff. Well, there's a person who

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Speaker 1: runs the hotel and they're really you know, they're catering

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Speaker 1: company in house and they have chairs. The catering company

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Speaker 1: runs the hotel. Martha. I got two super sign ups,

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Speaker 1: and I think with this evening's lecture, we're certainly we

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Speaker 1: have a quota of sixties super sign ups. We should

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Speaker 1: have hit half already. I know. I think it was

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Speaker 1: the food that came in boiling hut. Well, well, well, well,

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Speaker 1: everyone calmed down. I'm glad you've enjoyed your food. That

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Speaker 1: too much emotions right now, we're just setting up baseline

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Speaker 1: and I want you all to pair up. Buddy up.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry we are not putting two whelms together that

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Speaker 1: are over. I need it over and an underwhelmed everybody.

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Speaker 1: It should because with this loser is there Richard Richard here?

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Speaker 1: But you Richard, We're gonna needs to go with Mr

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Speaker 1: Parmesan Please, God, no anything I already know him? Is

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Speaker 1: that a problem? What is your name? Agains there? Okay,

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Speaker 1: why don't we do Michabo with Richard Richard? And well

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Speaker 1: my I'm actually on my husband's ticket, so you probably

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Speaker 1: have the names confused. Oh okay, um, can you just

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Speaker 1: hold onto my wrist for one second, look into my eyes?

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Speaker 1: You aren't under okay? Great? Great, you can you're with

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Speaker 1: Mr Parson and now which one is Mr Parmesan? It's me?

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, wow those are blue eyes. Yeah, the context.

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Speaker 1: So tell me this, if you had to fight a

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Speaker 1: hundred ducks or six hundred guys with swords, who would

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Speaker 1: you fight? Ducks? Ducks? Ducks? Yeah, I don't know. I

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Speaker 1: might do the swords. I don't know. You're a wild

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Speaker 1: So you're underwhelming. Great, I'm glad you. You're coming in

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Speaker 1: as pairs. Um, how is the exercise for you? Richard?

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Speaker 1: Richard and I forget your name, I'll take that, Charlie

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Speaker 1: mccab I get it right. You're you're pairing up somebody

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Speaker 1: who's a little over the top with somebody who's like

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Speaker 1: a real nobody, right, just a real wet blanket and

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Speaker 1: whole hoping a little bit of his lame loser energy

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Speaker 1: is gonna rub off on me and make me a

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Speaker 1: little less right, get the whelming balance? And I feel

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Speaker 1: absolutely like I walked into this conference feeling overwhelming, and

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Speaker 1: now I feel my welm is in perfect balance. So anyway,

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Speaker 1: hold on, hold on, hold on, Mr No, I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: say it's I wouldn't say it's perfect. See if you

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Speaker 1: want to find perfection. This is a super sign up

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Speaker 1: which gets you a one on one time with him. Now,

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Speaker 1: that's only if you want to go to the next

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Speaker 1: level of who you are. Richard. Richard was on stage,

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Speaker 1: all right, I think they're calling you. I just ditched

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Speaker 1: my fucking wet blanket. I had to see you're doing that.

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Speaker 1: Is anyone else going to come in right now? My

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Speaker 1: guy left? Maybe I can hide in here. Oh, I'm sorry. No,

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. You know this is I'm probably I'm I'm

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Speaker 1: on my husband's ticket. I don't even know what I'm doing. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I was. I'm not married, but I was. I just

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Speaker 1: I need to get confidence. Like I came here and

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Speaker 1: my fucking childhood bully, Wayne Parmesan is here, and I'm

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Speaker 1: just every time I look, kid, just fucking see fists.

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Speaker 1: You know that was my partner. He's just left. Oh

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Speaker 1: he's the worst time. I'm so sorry. If um he

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Speaker 1: made it hard for you, because he's certainly made my

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Speaker 1: life living hell, it's not your fault, I'm sure, Old

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Speaker 1: butter Ball. Oh hi, um, Martha, you'll be happy to

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Speaker 1: know we got thirteen super sign ups this evening. So

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Speaker 1: withirteen four that's fifteen super synups. Okay, so three days then,

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Speaker 1: and we only have thirteen? Well not if you say only,

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Speaker 1: but we have one more day, Dylan and I need

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Speaker 1: sixties super sign ups. By the way, Martha in my office, Um,

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Speaker 1: what role are you playing? Because I feel like Dylan's

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Speaker 1: doing all the work right, But did you want me

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Speaker 1: to come in your office? Or were you describing in

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Speaker 1: your office? Uh? No, I'm subscribing in my office. I'm curious.

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Speaker 1: I have this thought, that is, what do you effing do?

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Speaker 1: All right? Understand? Hi, sorry to interrupt. We have forty

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Speaker 1: two third degree burns from the food. Yeah, we're gonna

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Speaker 1: handle it. Okay, we're gonna handle it like people's skin

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Speaker 1: is falling off from the food. Handle it. Okay, it's

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Speaker 1: really hot. Okay, what I do? I managed? Um? Hey, Wayne,

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Speaker 1: Um is I just want to get by. Just let me.

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Speaker 1: Man Lott of the cocktail our guys slam on white wine,

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Speaker 1: holy ship. Man has split open. Man. You've seen Charlie. Man.

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Speaker 1: He was saying some crazy Charlie is Okay, I just

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Speaker 1: need to I just want to go. So if you

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Speaker 1: just let me, it's gonna say, I'm sorry. Man, fucking move.

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Speaker 1: Just fucking move, Wayne for one time and your fucking

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Speaker 1: life move. Let me through. This is Dick's Dick's day,

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Speaker 1: all right, Let me through, the stupid son of a

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Speaker 1: cheese bitch, all right. You know what, take my fucking fist,

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Speaker 1: take a fist. Excuse me, there's a butter ball. I

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Speaker 1: got a whoo away from her. Weak as husband, Sir,

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Speaker 1: I don't mean to interrupt you during your meditation. Um,

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Speaker 1: I just want to let you know that all things

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Speaker 1: are go for the final night. We got the smoke machines,

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Speaker 1: we got the food. The food temperature is under control.

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Speaker 1: What we think. Um, I'm a matter of fact, I

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Speaker 1: have a meeting with the catering um concierge just the moment,

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Speaker 1: to just make sure everything goes off. About a hitch,

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Speaker 1: I mean the person who runs the hotel, Dylan. He's meditating,

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Speaker 1: So why don't we just wait until he wakes up

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Speaker 1: from his meditation. You can't touch me, Martha, You can't

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Speaker 1: tell I didn't. I hovered over your shoulder. I hovered

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Speaker 1: over like you were touching me. But I didn't. I

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Speaker 1: didn't didn't. Okay, and you know what, do you know

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Speaker 1: maybe your reactor time we should we should triple we

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Speaker 1: should triple yours don't have that time. I don't have

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Speaker 1: that time, Martha. Well, Dylan, I don't know what to

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Speaker 1: tell you. Then. Okay, looks like we're gonna have to

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Speaker 1: take away those lashes you got, okay, to yourself. Lashes,

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Speaker 1: they're gonna taken away iron those iron those well they

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Speaker 1: can be taking away. All right, he's me. You're fired,

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Speaker 1: and you're fired. I'm taken over this bitch. That's right.

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Speaker 1: This is my conference. Now you better believe it. I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna whelm you guys to fucking death. No, no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: please just listen to us. Okay, he's meditating. When he

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Speaker 1: wakes up, all the secrets to the units will be revealed.

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Speaker 1: All right, Yeah, you know what. I'm the meditator. Now

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Speaker 1: look at me, Look at me. I'm the meditator. Now, man,

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Speaker 1: that's our first see everything. I like this world see too.

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Speaker 1: Is from listener Daniels, who wrote Hi kpcs or see

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Speaker 1: a suggestion drinking problem as in circumstances preventing someone from

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Speaker 1: drinking anything perspects you. Daniel is from Latvia. Trevor, put

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Speaker 1: that put that orange juice down? What do you do

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Speaker 1: about it, Trevor. No, no, oh, you want to use

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Speaker 1: my lips? You just lost far talk like this. I

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Speaker 1: can talk like I don't have to look. You just

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Speaker 1: lost your phone. Give a ship. Why I can't use

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Speaker 1: my lips? Why the hell would I use my phone? Oh?

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Speaker 1: I can text. I have a computer, dumbass. You just

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Speaker 1: lost your computer. Oh shut up. I can go to

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Speaker 1: I can go to a bank and use your computer. Okay,

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Speaker 1: if you want to do that every time. Yeah, let's

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Speaker 1: just see. Alright, let's let's see it. Don't let's see.

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Speaker 1: You don't talk to your parents that way? Right? Put

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Speaker 1: that orang juice down? What are you gonna do about it?

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Speaker 1: All right? You just lost your bed. I lost my

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Speaker 1: bed standing up like a horse. Just lost your shoes?

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Speaker 1: That fine. I don't need shoes to sleep. I don't

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Speaker 1: never sleep with shoes on. Well you're gonna be. If

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Speaker 1: you're gonna be standing and sleeping, we can play all day, Trevor.

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Speaker 1: I'll put a little towel down so I don't have

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Speaker 1: to do you wear shoes. You just lost the towels.

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Speaker 1: Oh great, So I'm gonna drive. I wanna take a shower.

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Speaker 1: I guess you're not taking showers. Oh, I guess I'm

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Speaker 1: just going to lakes in and just sundry. Hey, you're

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Speaker 1: gonna get arrested, but yeah, that's fine. No one, no

359
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Speaker 1: one out buy all the lander on Lake Pocashi. Will

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Speaker 1: be the only ones day we'll use it, and then

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Speaker 1: no one's gonna arrest me. All right, go for it.

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Speaker 1: Excuse me, sir, Child Protective Services. We got a call

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Speaker 1: that you've taken every single thing from your son. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: he's he is a he is a troublemaker. Yeah, he's

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Speaker 1: a troublemaker. Yeah yeah, yeah, you should never mind us

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Speaker 1: stop by, you know, just here's my card. If he

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Speaker 1: makes any more troubled, let me know. Oh that's interesting, alright, yeah,

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Speaker 1: no problem, of course. Okay. I see everyone's hands up

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Speaker 1: except Trevor. Trevor, do you not know the answer to

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Speaker 1: the question did you not read the book last night? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I did? Okay, so please raise your hand if you

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Speaker 1: know the answer. If everyone, then everyone knows. Who cares? Trevor?

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Speaker 1: What was the moral? It's a it's a tooth in

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Speaker 1: the back of your mouth, not not the Moeller bone head,

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Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you, and don't use that language. Please.

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Speaker 1: I mean a bone head. I know you'll tell me.

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Speaker 1: Now we were talking about morals. Morals, I'm gonna do

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Speaker 1: a little demonstration here and passed that little Dixie cups

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Speaker 1: to everybody. Okay, Now we come around for some grape

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Speaker 1: soda and to each of these cops. Okay, not yet,

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00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:06,560
Speaker 1: not yet, not yet, okay, everybody. So remember Tom Sawyer

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Speaker 1: had his issues. We want to remember that as we're

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Speaker 1: taking a sip from our soda. What is this about?

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Speaker 1: Trevor doesn't know how to drink? Shut up? Wait? What

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Speaker 1: is Trevor? Please drink? I'll do it later. Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: Trevor doesn't order to drink. Stop stop pouring it on junk.

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Speaker 1: This is why you're so angry he comes out there. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: go see the principal. No, I'm gonna go to my lake. Now,

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Speaker 1: the rest of your class, um hi um, Mr purdur Hi,

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm I'm Claire Donner. I'm Tony's mother. He's in

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Speaker 1: your classes, in your literature for Literature sake class. Uh yeah,

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Speaker 1: and I just wanted to talk to about so curriculum. No, No,

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Speaker 1: we're not teaching English this year. No English Literature for

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Speaker 1: Literature's sake, here's your class over you. This is gonna

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Speaker 1: be your syllabus, and you hit all these points, all right.

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Speaker 1: The main one is that Tom Sawyer had his issues.

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Speaker 1: All right, that's the main thing you want to hammer home.

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Speaker 1: Once they get that, you refill whatever soda that you

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Speaker 1: happen to have in the year, then maybe we can

400
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Speaker 1: move on to Great Catsby or just focus on Becky

401
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Speaker 1: Thatcher and Huck Finn if you want to just stay

402
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Speaker 1: on the summer road. And so, what was the what

403
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Speaker 1: was your issue? I was sorry, Well, my issue was that, um,

404
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Speaker 1: I really were really looking for him to get into

405
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Speaker 1: Ivy League schools like it's father and I and we

406
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Speaker 1: were just, um, we're concerned about that. He was just

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Speaker 1: getting able art education here and get he's not the classics.

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Speaker 1: I understand your concern. No, he's a very gifted student,

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Speaker 1: and I see no nothing stopping him from going into

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Speaker 1: whatever school he wants to go to. Did you know

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Speaker 1: that that young man Trevor has a problem drinking? I

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Speaker 1: do you know Trevor? I don't know. He's a kid

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Speaker 1: who acts out a lot. But I just think I

414
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:23,239
Speaker 1: realized in this last class that is he's acting out

415
00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:29,359
Speaker 1: because he's scared. I'm really concerned about my son. Grape soda,

416
00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:34,280
Speaker 1: I'm sure. So all he wanted to talk about was Trevor.

417
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:41,080
Speaker 1: I don't understand. Yes, yes, Tony, honey, please that language.

418
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:44,960
Speaker 1: He's terrible. He's a terrible teacher. Oh my god, we

419
00:26:45,080 --> 00:26:46,200
Speaker 1: have to we have to move here. We have to

420
00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:48,720
Speaker 1: get to another school. Honey, this rip up my prince

421
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:51,080
Speaker 1: in an application because I'm not getting in now, Tony,

422
00:26:51,119 --> 00:26:54,080
Speaker 1: you're getting in, your legacy, You're getting in. Okay, now

423
00:26:54,240 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 1: this isn't honey. Can you just say something to Tony? Please? Please?

424
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:00,199
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm I'm a single parent here. Can

425
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:04,200
Speaker 1: go to Rochester College where I went? No, he cannot.

426
00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:09,960
Speaker 1: You cannot. You and dad ended up together again. It's

427
00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:14,000
Speaker 1: a funny story. I'm at this conference right wrong hotel.

428
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:17,800
Speaker 1: I'm part of a catering company that owns a bunch

429
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:25,359
Speaker 1: of hotels and your mother, honey, he came in and

430
00:27:25,480 --> 00:27:29,840
Speaker 1: he burned me on with some state lasagna. I was

431
00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:34,119
Speaker 1: also there, and um, and that's not an everyday thing.

432
00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:36,440
Speaker 1: So just think how good this catering restaurant. I don't

433
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:45,080
Speaker 1: understand any aspect of this story. Classic Peter is spending

434
00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:48,600
Speaker 1: his time dealing with one student. There's thirty of us

435
00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:52,760
Speaker 1: in the class. Hey, young man, what you doing out here?

436
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:57,359
Speaker 1: Doth just hanging out on my lake? Oh? This is

437
00:27:57,440 --> 00:28:02,679
Speaker 1: your lake? Yeah? You have problem with that? No problems? Thirsty?

438
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:11,160
Speaker 1: I'm so thirsty. How old are you? Fourteen hundred years old?

439
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:19,879
Speaker 1: What I'm fourteen hundred years old? Well? Look, I got

440
00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:21,760
Speaker 1: a little bit of water, I got a lot of

441
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:32,200
Speaker 1: bit of whiskey. Which one would you like? Um? Uh um,

442
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:37,159
Speaker 1: you hold that. I gotta fish. I gotta fish coming in.

443
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,120
Speaker 1: I guess I'll try that. Mr Peter. Trevor's not even

444
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:43,960
Speaker 1: here today. Why are you? Why are you directing the

445
00:28:44,080 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 1: lesson toward him? Everybody knows he's living in the woods

446
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:54,040
Speaker 1: with that creepy what's the moral of Trevor's story? Is

447
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:59,440
Speaker 1: my question to all of you? You drink? That's right?

448
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:03,320
Speaker 1: Mr Prad. I'm sorry. There's a lot of complaints rolling in,

449
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:05,320
Speaker 1: and you know I'm on your site here. We're both

450
00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:08,120
Speaker 1: Rochester College alums, so that's why I wanted you to

451
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 1: work here. But you're gonna have to change the lesson

452
00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:14,720
Speaker 1: plan up now and not cater to just Trevor who

453
00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:16,680
Speaker 1: hasn't been in class for the last three and a

454
00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:19,360
Speaker 1: half weeks. Isn't that concerning? By the way, isn't that

455
00:29:19,360 --> 00:29:21,960
Speaker 1: a little concerning? I think the most concerning thing is

456
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:23,800
Speaker 1: that there's a fourteen year old boy who's been able

457
00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:26,760
Speaker 1: to survive without any water or liquid his entire life,

458
00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:30,080
Speaker 1: and yet no one's reaching out to him. You're trying

459
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:33,400
Speaker 1: to reach him through literature for literature sake, and it's

460
00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:35,960
Speaker 1: not working. Purder, So, what we're gonna do is, I'm

461
00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:38,400
Speaker 1: gonna have a sub just show like the Birds by

462
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 1: Hitchcock for this week, and you're gonna take, uh this here,

463
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: this lesson plan. You're gonna go down to that lake

464
00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:45,200
Speaker 1: and you're gonna try to reach that boy directly and

465
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:47,560
Speaker 1: don't come back until you figured out how to get

466
00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:50,440
Speaker 1: him to stop causing trouble and very hard. If he's

467
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:52,640
Speaker 1: there with a crazy old guy, well you're just you're

468
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:55,760
Speaker 1: a teacher, man. Teachers they're underappreciated, but they can teach

469
00:29:55,840 --> 00:29:58,960
Speaker 1: in the worst circumstances. Have you seen dangerous minds? She

470
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:02,120
Speaker 1: puts a chair backwards and she gets through to those kids.

471
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 1: You only have to get through to one kid, one

472
00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 1: kid by a lake. All right, Okay, alright, guy, everybody,

473
00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 1: I'm your substitute. I'm also Tony's dad. Hey, Tony Dad, alright, Tony,

474
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:22,600
Speaker 1: all right, don't call me dad in the classroom. Okay. Um,

475
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:25,680
Speaker 1: So first of all, we are going to watch a movie.

476
00:30:25,840 --> 00:30:31,840
Speaker 1: Now the principle Mr Pearder teaches class. Well Mr Peardor

477
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 1: is not here? All right? Crazy in prison? I don't know, man.

478
00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:38,360
Speaker 1: They don't tell us when we get the call, and

479
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:42,160
Speaker 1: they just give us the assignment. So here we go.

480
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:44,320
Speaker 1: We're gonna They told me to say in birds that's

481
00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:47,600
Speaker 1: not a good movie. So we're gonna watch Jurassic Park. Mr.

482
00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:51,640
Speaker 1: Pearder usually sings, that's it. You can just drink from

483
00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:58,760
Speaker 1: your butt. Wow? Hey, what's going on over here? What

484
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:06,400
Speaker 1: are you teaching me to drink from your butt? Boy?

485
00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:09,280
Speaker 1: Get away from him right now. Stay over there, Trevor,

486
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:15,960
Speaker 1: are you okay? Son? So Dad, Dad, who's you brought

487
00:31:16,040 --> 00:31:20,880
Speaker 1: my shoes a towel? Who are you? I'm his teacher?

488
00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:23,920
Speaker 1: And that guy was teaching me to chug from his

489
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 1: butt too. I know, yeah, Steve, we went to college together.

490
00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:35,840
Speaker 1: What Dad, I really think that guy is a drinking problem. Son.

491
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:40,520
Speaker 1: You won't know a drinking problem. Well, he's chugging through

492
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:44,120
Speaker 1: his But I just think that's a problem. Son. You don't.

493
00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:48,240
Speaker 1: We're gonna help you, all right, all right, what's what's

494
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:53,120
Speaker 1: your name? Mr? Teacher? That's fine, all right, it's Mr

495
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:55,640
Speaker 1: Your teacher, and I are going to attack team you

496
00:31:56,240 --> 00:31:58,640
Speaker 1: to teach you how to drink water? And what about me?

497
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:02,840
Speaker 1: I want to help the boy? All right, we'll do

498
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:07,160
Speaker 1: it three ways. Alright, we'll do it three ways. Do

499
00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:10,960
Speaker 1: a bit of a montage here. You can just teach me.

500
00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:13,760
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't need like I mean, we're

501
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:16,200
Speaker 1: gonna be like a step by step introduction to this.

502
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:22,280
Speaker 1: It's really difficult. It's not really all right. Why do

503
00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:28,080
Speaker 1: I start? Why? Why do I start? Remember Tom Sawyer? Uh?

504
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 1: Kind of okay? Anybody else, That's all I had, That's

505
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 1: all I wow, everybody, Look at Trevor. He's so bloated.

506
00:32:43,280 --> 00:32:44,719
Speaker 1: I don't think my body is supposed to be able

507
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:56,120
Speaker 1: to retain water. Oh god, he's expanding. So anyway, that

508
00:32:56,240 --> 00:32:59,120
Speaker 1: was the most remarkable thing happened to me in high school.

509
00:32:59,160 --> 00:33:01,160
Speaker 1: I guess it isn't really to me. It was more

510
00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 1: to uh Trevor and Mr Purder and then and Trevor's

511
00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:08,560
Speaker 1: dad and that creepy guy who lives at the lake.

512
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:10,880
Speaker 1: But anyway, that's why I think you should let me

513
00:33:10,920 --> 00:33:16,040
Speaker 1: into the Princeton freshman class. M hmm. Interesting and interesting.

514
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 1: You have every single app looking to come to us

515
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:20,920
Speaker 1: and tell us why they think they should be up

516
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:27,720
Speaker 1: hard to the Princeton brushman class and your story, and

517
00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:37,719
Speaker 1: that's our sick insane. See three is from listener Thomas.

518
00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 1: He wrote, how do y'all? I'll keep it short and sweet,

519
00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 1: just like Joey thanksgiving a grandma's house which is in

520
00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:50,760
Speaker 1: a cursed forest. Thanks Thomas. Oh yes, okay, should just

521
00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 1: be right up the road here. Now, Please everybody don't

522
00:33:53,840 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 1: say anything about the goddamn house, all right, White always

523
00:33:59,720 --> 00:34:02,320
Speaker 1: you have to be so negative because I grew up

524
00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:05,680
Speaker 1: in this, alright, I grew up in this. That's why

525
00:34:06,120 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 1: dad grew up in like a he's a monkey. What

526
00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:13,200
Speaker 1: it's funny, but it's not appropriate. He's not going to

527
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:14,879
Speaker 1: get in the ivy league, you know that. Let's listen

528
00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 1: to this guy. Look at listen to this. He could

529
00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:22,600
Speaker 1: be a monkey. Oh my god, in the trees, dad,

530
00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:24,759
Speaker 1: he grew up in these trees. Then grow up in

531
00:34:24,840 --> 00:34:32,439
Speaker 1: the trees. Okay, is it's the forest? Yes, I grew up. Look,

532
00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:36,280
Speaker 1: we're just gonna spend the day, maybe the day after Thanksgiving,

533
00:34:36,680 --> 00:34:40,399
Speaker 1: and then we'll go. Okay, all right, is that cool?

534
00:34:40,440 --> 00:34:41,520
Speaker 1: Can we do that? I don't want to spend a

535
00:34:41,560 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 1: lot of time here. How old is grandma? Grandma is

536
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:54,040
Speaker 1: eight six? You okay? All right? You need to let

537
00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:59,600
Speaker 1: him speak his mind. You're always stifling him. Well, it's insane, insane.

538
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:02,279
Speaker 1: There's not the jungle. There's on monkeys here. This is

539
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:06,080
Speaker 1: not their natural habit. That does it mean sense? Jokes,

540
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: he's making jokes. He's looking funny. But the jokes. What

541
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 1: what's the connection? What? What the trees? Monkeys? He's not

542
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 1: gonna make it in the ivy League. I'm just telling

543
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:21,520
Speaker 1: you gonna do just fine. There's Grandma. There's Grandma. She's

544
00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:29,480
Speaker 1: waving hello, Hello, Come, I'm coming to the house. All right,

545
00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:33,239
Speaker 1: look just please can we just have the dinner and

546
00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 1: then leave the next day. Please. No one's saying anything,

547
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 1: just please, that's all I'm saying. Hello. There's my little monkey, mum.

548
00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:48,879
Speaker 1: Good to see you, the whole fan damn please here,

549
00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:55,480
Speaker 1: goodness great? Hi there, Oh look at this little fella

550
00:35:56,560 --> 00:36:00,560
Speaker 1: so big. Can we eat something sweet? Oh? Oh you can,

551
00:36:00,760 --> 00:36:09,000
Speaker 1: but there are dire con sequence, is Charlene? All right? Here,

552
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:12,600
Speaker 1: look there's this little bowl here. There's ribbing candy in here,

553
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:16,360
Speaker 1: and where there's originals and and chuckles and a biddow

554
00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:20,320
Speaker 1: honey and uh, just some granulated sugar package. Just you

555
00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:23,640
Speaker 1: take your pick. What's in this other bowl? Grandma charline?

556
00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:27,879
Speaker 1: This other bowl? Oh, I wouldn't look into the other ball.

557
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:40,839
Speaker 1: Why just ask your husband, sheriff. I'm just gonna clock out.

558
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:44,440
Speaker 1: But um, I did the rounds around the forest. Everything's good.

559
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:46,000
Speaker 1: I don't know what they hell, you're worried about it?

560
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 1: Just Thanksgiving. It's not a spooky season or anything. So well,

561
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:53,719
Speaker 1: you know they sometimes the monkeys get railed up around Thanksgiving?

562
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:58,359
Speaker 1: What sometimes the monkeys get riled up around Thanksgiving? Well,

563
00:36:58,400 --> 00:37:01,440
Speaker 1: let's do close down so long ago. I mean, well,

564
00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:05,759
Speaker 1: you know it's it's good to prepare for for any contingency.

565
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:08,799
Speaker 1: How I'll check those Oh again, I'm Danny. I don't

566
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:12,360
Speaker 1: think anything to happen. It's been it's been vacant for decades.

567
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:17,359
Speaker 1: The same. Did you go by the old Dakota place. Yeah,

568
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:21,560
Speaker 1: it's a creepy. Okay, but she seemed finding well, well,

569
00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:25,480
Speaker 1: that's good, that's good. She's she's holding onto life. Yes,

570
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:27,440
Speaker 1: she is, uh strange, she seems to get younger and

571
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 1: young green, and it's weird, didn't it. Yeah it is.

572
00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:34,560
Speaker 1: I feel like ten years ago she was the oldest

573
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:37,560
Speaker 1: woman I've ever seen, and then uh, and then she

574
00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:47,719
Speaker 1: she's starting to look pretty good. Yeah, I mean I'm not. Yeah, yeah,

575
00:37:48,120 --> 00:37:52,320
Speaker 1: I am too. Of course, we're both we're both married men. Grandma.

576
00:37:52,400 --> 00:37:58,479
Speaker 1: There's so many spiders in the bathtub. Oh, dis ignore them. There,

577
00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:05,239
Speaker 1: that's there their place, okay, Well, oh well then you'll

578
00:38:05,280 --> 00:38:08,920
Speaker 1: have to take it with them. Um, there's Gus and

579
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:14,680
Speaker 1: Corrizole and uh, bubbly boy, those are the spiders and

580
00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:20,000
Speaker 1: that's where they live. Okay. And did my dad take

581
00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:25,440
Speaker 1: pass with spiders? He did? And why is he so

582
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:27,960
Speaker 1: mad about being here? And why does he feel like

583
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,879
Speaker 1: he's denying who he is and where he came from.

584
00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:38,200
Speaker 1: You're an inquisitive little ladder, Well, your dad, they just

585
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:41,839
Speaker 1: never quite understood what goes on around here. He didn't

586
00:38:41,840 --> 00:38:44,000
Speaker 1: surrender to it like the rest of the family did.

587
00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,279
Speaker 1: And if he had, he would probably be happier. In

588
00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 1: his own skin. Now do you understand, Grandma, I'm gonna

589
00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:55,880
Speaker 1: surrender you are Mr Joper. I just finished the research

590
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:58,719
Speaker 1: and the translations on the codex she sent me. It's

591
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 1: really interesting stuff. It's saying that in the forest, uh,

592
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:07,800
Speaker 1: there is a centralized well I'm not sure, but the

593
00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:12,360
Speaker 1: direct translation is magic of the earth. Apparently it's some

594
00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:18,319
Speaker 1: kind of parallel dimension able to act. You will never

595
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:24,480
Speaker 1: speak of this finding ever, What do you mean? This

596
00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:26,200
Speaker 1: has to be published? We have to put this on

597
00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:32,279
Speaker 1: some kind of pamphlet from your here would you're you're

598
00:39:32,320 --> 00:39:35,279
Speaker 1: burning up my paper? How will I print out another? Oh?

599
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:39,319
Speaker 1: It's on your Oh, this fire is getting out of hand,

600
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:46,000
Speaker 1: as far as get out of hand. Some mistakes, I'm sorry.

601
00:39:50,880 --> 00:39:53,200
Speaker 1: We have to rub each other out. Yeah, so we

602
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:55,279
Speaker 1: had to just mark off the old neighbor. Looks like

603
00:39:55,360 --> 00:39:56,960
Speaker 1: this fire just jumped from one out to the neck

604
00:39:57,040 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 1: to the next to the next, just ripping through all

605
00:39:58,719 --> 00:40:01,399
Speaker 1: these anex buildings we were able to find. It looks

606
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:04,560
Speaker 1: like a codex. Now, my Shamearrian ain't that sharp as

607
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:06,680
Speaker 1: it used to be. But from what I was able

608
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:09,960
Speaker 1: to translate into safer, it looks like right here that

609
00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:13,839
Speaker 1: there is some kind of chaotic well or something like that. Now,

610
00:40:13,960 --> 00:40:17,600
Speaker 1: traditionally people are gonna say earth magic, but that ain't it. Okay,

611
00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:20,239
Speaker 1: that's a really simple way of looking at it. This here,

612
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:23,400
Speaker 1: right here, this is the demon foreigner. Yeah, this is

613
00:40:23,520 --> 00:40:27,000
Speaker 1: an evil son of a bit. So, uh, we gotta

614
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:29,320
Speaker 1: really do something about that, Chief. But it looks like

615
00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:31,440
Speaker 1: it's an electrical fire as far as I can tell.

616
00:40:31,800 --> 00:40:35,480
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe I should stop by, stop by Geraldine Dakota's

617
00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:38,600
Speaker 1: place and just check up on her, you know. Sure, Well,

618
00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:41,680
Speaker 1: like you said, you know, translating from the Sumerian and all,

619
00:40:41,719 --> 00:40:44,960
Speaker 1: it does sound like it's uh and and I mean,

620
00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:48,000
Speaker 1: you know, I don't think I'm talking out of school

621
00:40:48,040 --> 00:40:51,439
Speaker 1: by saying that she is looking good. He's looking great.

622
00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:55,600
Speaker 1: We're marrying that, we're marrying. Man, I can appreciate the

623
00:40:55,680 --> 00:41:02,399
Speaker 1: beauty of a fellow human being. Oh, hello, Chief's good

624
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:05,719
Speaker 1: to see you. Hi. They're Geraldine. I just wanted to

625
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:09,239
Speaker 1: make sure that your Thanksgiving is going okay. So it's

626
00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:13,880
Speaker 1: going great. The whole family's here, great, great, Hello, your

627
00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:17,480
Speaker 1: uniform is awfully sharp. Well, I I shined my badge

628
00:41:17,560 --> 00:41:21,520
Speaker 1: this morning. I uh I I shined it once a

629
00:41:21,600 --> 00:41:23,640
Speaker 1: month but so you're you're getting in it. It's a

630
00:41:23,840 --> 00:41:26,960
Speaker 1: maximum shining nous. That's very shiny. Which should like to

631
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:30,400
Speaker 1: come in for some sweet they're upstairs in the in

632
00:41:30,520 --> 00:41:34,279
Speaker 1: the cabinet. Would you like to come in for for

633
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:37,000
Speaker 1: a bite? Well, I never say you no to a bite?

634
00:41:38,800 --> 00:41:41,319
Speaker 1: All right, Well come on through here you can. Well, first,

635
00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:43,680
Speaker 1: let's have a brandy in the entry room. Okay, does

636
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:47,319
Speaker 1: that sound good? I'd love it. I'd love a brandy. Dad.

637
00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:54,239
Speaker 1: I'm soaking wet? What you tell? Here? You go? Dad?

638
00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:56,839
Speaker 1: I was I read. I was reading some of your

639
00:41:56,880 --> 00:42:00,840
Speaker 1: old journals from a kid, old journals. I don't have

640
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 1: old journals. Are you talking about Yeah? The one that

641
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 1: says into the forest, into the night, look into the eyes,

642
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:11,400
Speaker 1: see no, fright? Are you talking about it? What we're what?

643
00:42:12,600 --> 00:42:14,759
Speaker 1: Did you bring these books into the bas club? No?

644
00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:19,719
Speaker 1: What as hell? Why don't she? This is? This is

645
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:22,640
Speaker 1: old as hell. This, this doesn't feel like paper, feels

646
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:26,520
Speaker 1: like the leather. Yeah. And this little hair sticking at

647
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:30,759
Speaker 1: him too? I thought that was yours? No, No, this

648
00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:34,520
Speaker 1: is really strange. Did you did you read this? Yeah?

649
00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:36,360
Speaker 1: I read the whole thing out loud in the mirror.

650
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:40,880
Speaker 1: This this is Samarian, have another sip of that brandy.

651
00:42:41,280 --> 00:42:44,080
Speaker 1: This is some strong brandy, Gerald Jane. So I know

652
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:47,280
Speaker 1: it's really good. They still coming into the forest into

653
00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:51,280
Speaker 1: the night, look around and find some fright spiders Glee

654
00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:55,320
Speaker 1: and Spliders Club. The evil the centuries comes out of

655
00:42:55,440 --> 00:43:01,279
Speaker 1: my thombs. Okay, now that that your voice still, that's

656
00:43:01,320 --> 00:43:07,160
Speaker 1: doing that right, that's yeah, Okay. Oh god, I just

657
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:12,760
Speaker 1: felt like I looked straight into the face of evil. Deep.

658
00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:18,160
Speaker 1: Oh god, these these vines have tied into the chair.

659
00:43:22,680 --> 00:43:27,000
Speaker 1: I'm sure he's fine, Mischief, I'm sure he's fine. I'll

660
00:43:27,400 --> 00:43:30,920
Speaker 1: I'll be looking around, but it's stacy, not out of respect.

661
00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 1: Out of respect, of course, yes, miss Chief. But yeah,

662
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:36,040
Speaker 1: so you know we'll be looking around for him. It's

663
00:43:36,320 --> 00:43:40,160
Speaker 1: just me, me and Chief. But this is three am.

664
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:43,360
Speaker 1: He never stays out the late well, it's almost Thanksgiving,

665
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:45,040
Speaker 1: you know how he gets around that time of the year.

666
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:48,839
Speaker 1: Where's the last place he went? This place he went? Uh?

667
00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:52,359
Speaker 1: I think he was at the last place. The chief

668
00:43:52,400 --> 00:43:56,359
Speaker 1: point was probably at the old the old the Zoom mine.

669
00:43:56,440 --> 00:44:01,600
Speaker 1: That's where he was at. Yeah, wasn't anybody's house. No,

670
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:06,879
Speaker 1: we're married, man, we're married man. Uh so uh yeah,

671
00:44:07,160 --> 00:44:11,080
Speaker 1: I'll check. All right, it's not a missing persons yet,

672
00:44:11,160 --> 00:44:13,840
Speaker 1: you know? So? Yeah, No, I wasn't and I wouldn't

673
00:44:13,880 --> 00:44:15,320
Speaker 1: even assume that. I don't even know why I said that.

674
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:22,959
Speaker 1: Vines of green, Vines of right, take away the sheriff fight.

675
00:44:24,719 --> 00:44:34,319
Speaker 1: What are you eating me? Gerald? God? No, Grandma's back.

676
00:44:34,400 --> 00:44:38,200
Speaker 1: I'm starving. Thanksgiving? Then we get to eat, oh some

677
00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:43,400
Speaker 1: of us already. Yeah, it's time to eat very soon.

678
00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:49,520
Speaker 1: Oh oh you found you found the guide? Yeah, I

679
00:44:49,600 --> 00:44:54,120
Speaker 1: found Dad's journals. But he's like all weird about it. Now, Um,

680
00:44:54,320 --> 00:44:57,480
Speaker 1: you should probably did you read that A lad into

681
00:44:57,480 --> 00:45:01,320
Speaker 1: the mirror? What did I just do? What did I jest?

682
00:45:01,440 --> 00:45:30,840
Speaker 1: Jim do? What I just famb Mom? What the holy ship? Honey, honey,

683
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:33,960
Speaker 1: I'm watching Shark Tank. Yeah, close the door. Okay, it

684
00:45:34,040 --> 00:45:35,840
Speaker 1: looks like some some monkeys from this you're just just

685
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:39,200
Speaker 1: busted in here. Okay, I'm gonna call the cops. What

686
00:45:40,640 --> 00:45:43,359
Speaker 1: I'm not outside? I know, I'm telling you. The clothes

687
00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:49,280
Speaker 1: the goddamn door. Okay, some chimpanzees are in here. It's closed.

688
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:55,600
Speaker 1: Well okay, God, great Jesus, Okay, what are you getting them?

689
00:45:55,640 --> 00:45:58,200
Speaker 1: Why does it come down here? Don't lock the door.

690
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:13,839
Speaker 1: What are those doing here? Giving? Giving? Dan Deving camping boy?

691
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:21,080
Speaker 1: We said the same time, jinks, No, why did you say? Yeah?

692
00:46:21,120 --> 00:46:29,440
Speaker 1: I think the chee saved me. Okay, I checked the zoo.

693
00:46:29,520 --> 00:46:31,880
Speaker 1: Nothing there, all right, just go to the house and

694
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:39,319
Speaker 1: then then I'll call him like okay, alright, I checked,

695
00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:50,360
Speaker 1: al right, Okay, Hi, hither a little boy? Uh? Is

696
00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:53,719
Speaker 1: uh your mom or dad? Are you a fireman or policeman?

697
00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:56,719
Speaker 1: A little bit of both? A small town a small town?

698
00:46:57,880 --> 00:47:03,840
Speaker 1: We're both hats here, so you wanna come inside? Was

699
00:47:03,880 --> 00:47:07,840
Speaker 1: your mom or dad here? I don't know, you don't know,

700
00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:10,880
Speaker 1: I don't know. Have you seen anyone who's got a

701
00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:12,400
Speaker 1: little thing like this on their chest? Right here? A

702
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:17,480
Speaker 1: little star? Oh? Yeah, grandma does? Oh? Oh can you

703
00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:23,160
Speaker 1: speak to your grandma? Yeah? Come on in, lerk lerk chief,

704
00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:34,960
Speaker 1: chief testes, Oh my god, chief, Oh, don't tell Mrs Chief.

705
00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:40,000
Speaker 1: Don't tell Mrs Chief. She's a oh god, she's a

706
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 1: demonic base no water, she's getting younger all the time.

707
00:47:43,200 --> 00:47:48,360
Speaker 1: She looks good. Yeah, we're married, man, are married. That's

708
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:54,200
Speaker 1: our show, everybody. Let's see what everybody's up to. A

709
00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:57,960
Speaker 1: tool thing? Nah? Hey, thanks for having me always a

710
00:47:58,080 --> 00:48:00,719
Speaker 1: pleasure to uh to be here and have some fun

711
00:48:00,800 --> 00:48:03,560
Speaker 1: with you guys. Um you can follow me at a

712
00:48:03,719 --> 00:48:06,720
Speaker 1: tool time and all the socials and yeah, thanks again

713
00:48:07,480 --> 00:48:10,600
Speaker 1: nice Chris Alvarado, thanks for having me. I love playing

714
00:48:10,680 --> 00:48:12,560
Speaker 1: with you guys. I love making stuff up, I love

715
00:48:12,600 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 1: being monkeys. I just had great I thought James was

716
00:48:15,080 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 1: particularly strong in this episode. I'm being honest, just really

717
00:48:18,120 --> 00:48:20,360
Speaker 1: fun to play with. James. I don't know if you

718
00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:24,080
Speaker 1: guys could hear, but there's just next door just smashing

719
00:48:24,200 --> 00:48:27,920
Speaker 1: and hammering, and so I just muted my microphone and

720
00:48:28,280 --> 00:48:31,240
Speaker 1: saddled back with people doing it or there's like tools

721
00:48:31,320 --> 00:48:33,680
Speaker 1: and stuff being used. Well, it started with what I

722
00:48:33,760 --> 00:48:36,279
Speaker 1: thought somebody was maybe hanging a picture on the wall,

723
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:41,320
Speaker 1: and then it became all sorts of power tools. James Beaney,

724
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:43,840
Speaker 1: why don't you let us know what's going on with you?

725
00:48:43,920 --> 00:48:47,440
Speaker 1: Other things? Inspection work. That's pretty much my world right now.

726
00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:53,440
Speaker 1: Volume down, all right, Greg Getkowsky. If you don't already

727
00:48:53,520 --> 00:48:55,920
Speaker 1: have HBO Max, this would be a good time to

728
00:48:56,000 --> 00:48:59,000
Speaker 1: get a subscription by by mid November so you can

729
00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:01,400
Speaker 1: watch a little show called sex Lives of College Girls.

730
00:49:02,400 --> 00:49:04,200
Speaker 1: I'm only in a couple of them. And it's it's

731
00:49:04,239 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 1: not a porno and uh and uh I play a debt.

732
00:49:10,120 --> 00:49:13,719
Speaker 1: They check that out. Joey Greer, I am gonna check

733
00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:16,719
Speaker 1: out sex Lives with College Girls and uh, I can't

734
00:49:16,760 --> 00:49:20,800
Speaker 1: wait to see that. Also check out murder What was it?

735
00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:26,320
Speaker 1: Craig murder Berry Kill, murder Berry Win, Murderberry Win, Murderberry

736
00:49:26,360 --> 00:49:31,839
Speaker 1: Win got on Prime Awesome. I'm at Stratton Cooler at

737
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:35,919
Speaker 1: Cold Stratton on those social things. Uh, let's thank our

738
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:42,120
Speaker 1: wonderful engineer and producer Doug Bay and the fine folks

739
00:49:42,160 --> 00:49:46,839
Speaker 1: at I Heart Media dot com. He's right to us

740
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:50,520
Speaker 1: at Alchemy this email at gmail dot com. That's Alchemy

741
00:49:52,600 --> 00:50:06,840
Speaker 1: Com until next time. And a football a