Speaker 1: Look man, oh I see you? Why and look over there?
Speaker 1: How is that Archer? Yes? Goodness Dan last culture rest
Speaker 1: just calling. I am upset because I really needed you
Speaker 1: on Thursday, because I'm coming to New York on Wednesday
Speaker 1: and I needed you on Thursday, and You're gonna be
Speaker 1: on Atlanta until Sunday, which sort of fucks me up.
Speaker 1: I didn't plan for this. I'm so sorry. Why do
Speaker 1: you need me on Thursday? I need you to go
Speaker 1: suit shopping with me. I need a suit for a
Speaker 1: straight wedding. Oh my god, why do you need there?
Speaker 1: You've done it before. I just don't want to go alone,
Speaker 1: and I felt like it could be bonding time with
Speaker 1: me and my Cis you understand anyway? How are you
Speaker 1: enjoying Atlanta instead of being with me and shopping for suits?
Speaker 1: It's interesting? Um, I am in the parts where um
Speaker 1: a lot of the people. Basically, I went to Berries
Speaker 1: today in Buckhead, which, um what remember, not a brag
Speaker 1: at all, Not a brag at all, But I went
Speaker 1: to berries and buckhout it's very you know, straight rich
Speaker 1: white energy, which we love in settings like berries where
Speaker 1: you know, it's kind of a safe space for that.
Speaker 1: But um, I so thick. I don't like my has.
Speaker 1: Remember that episode of Grays where you don't like your
Speaker 1: calves they're famous, Well, they're they're they're they're they're hanging
Speaker 1: too low now and they're a little too meaty. And
Speaker 1: then there was an episode where I was like, Callie
Speaker 1: and and Christina have to slice into a man's the
Speaker 1: second week in a row, you've taken saw a topic
Speaker 1: that we're talking about and then bringing up a niche
Speaker 1: old episode of Gray's Anatomy. It's it's iconic. It's almost
Speaker 1: as iconic as your own calves. The way you do this,
Speaker 1: and I don't know of I know that episode you're
Speaker 1: talking about, you know what? You know what I'm talking about, right,
Speaker 1: And they both they both each have a scalpel and
Speaker 1: then they both like looking at each other's eyes and
Speaker 1: count down, and then you see the fucking decision. And
Speaker 1: then that that brilliant act or whoever that was playing
Speaker 1: the patient is going like really really iconic screamwork or
Speaker 1: that has nothing to do with how your calves look
Speaker 1: currently do that? I bet they looks absolutely stunning. There.
Speaker 1: Your chief feature, I believe today was arms and ams.
Speaker 1: Was my first time in any group fitness setting since
Speaker 1: the pandemic and god to say, just as debasing and
Speaker 1: humiliating as it was before. No progress. Since it's okay,
Speaker 1: it's okay. Can I tell you what happened to me
Speaker 1: today at the gym? Yeah? I haven't heard from you
Speaker 1: in so long, queen, Yeah, well what happened to you?
Speaker 1: What happened to at the gym today? So I'm in,
Speaker 1: I'm sort of in the locker room right looking around.
Speaker 1: You're looking hot, by the way. Can I say something?
Speaker 1: Can I say something humiliating? Every day I go to
Speaker 1: the gym and I work hard. No, I know I'm
Speaker 1: doing the same. I think that's why I went absolutely,
Speaker 1: But I'm not really going for an ideal. I just
Speaker 1: want to be able to like walk on and be
Speaker 1: feel good. You know what this is? This is this
Speaker 1: is this is what we have and we're grateful for it.
Speaker 1: And there was some some effort put into this and
Speaker 1: I'm the best. That's the best we can do. I'm
Speaker 1: not I did not mean to entrap you with your statements.
Speaker 1: That's not what I do, but I ever felt in
Speaker 1: trap for exect. But here's what I here's what I'll say.
Speaker 1: So you need to be less victimized by my words. Queen, Well,
Speaker 1: I'm really a lot of it is just sort of
Speaker 1: me playing with you like the cat now and jerry
Speaker 1: of it all. You understand. I can drag you a
Speaker 1: little bit because I love to see you on your
Speaker 1: hind legs, because that's when your calves popped the most.
Speaker 1: And I my mouse or and my cat, and then
Speaker 1: I open between the dogs you're and then you're the
Speaker 1: dog and I'm the cap. But then in the carr
Speaker 1: of my mouse, you're the cat, I'm the mouse, et cetera.
Speaker 1: I think I'm always gonna be the bigger one. This
Speaker 1: actually is a good segue. But first I want to
Speaker 1: talk about what happened to me at the gym. What
Speaker 1: happened at the gym, and older daddy in the locker
Speaker 1: room gave me the look that said, let's fuck, and
Speaker 1: I was like, I couldn't have run out of there faster.
Speaker 1: And I can't tell you the whole thing horned me
Speaker 1: up because he was hot, but I was too like
Speaker 1: chaotic in my head about hooking up at the gym,
Speaker 1: something I've never done. I understand our guest is appalled.
Speaker 1: She's surprised. Well, you know, some of us have never
Speaker 1: gotten that look, and I think you should have. Really,
Speaker 1: next time you get that look, you should really go
Speaker 1: for it. Okay, Honestly, as you know, I've been in
Speaker 1: all sorts of new sexual pursuits. Maybe the maybe hooking
Speaker 1: up with the daddy at the gym is sort of
Speaker 1: my thing. Now maybe I'm coming anyway, um to sort
Speaker 1: of speak on the Tom and Jerry of it all. Yes,
Speaker 1: here's the thing about our guests. Now, you sort of
Speaker 1: told me that our guests did remember this happening, But
Speaker 1: I don't know I was there, So she did know
Speaker 1: you were. I think she does that you were there.
Speaker 1: Cut to cut to just readers go back in time
Speaker 1: with us too. I think what was it the two
Speaker 1: nineteen Emmy's. It was the last Emmy's with the crowd,
Speaker 1: the last Emmys, so with a crowd. So Bowen and
Speaker 1: I decide about halfway through, we're gonna go sort of
Speaker 1: to the bar. You understand, we're gonna get our red wines.
Speaker 1: We're gon we're gonna load up. And we asked, we
Speaker 1: sort of asked around like who needs drinks? Everyone's saying
Speaker 1: I need a drink. I need a drink. We go great.
Speaker 1: So we're walking back into the into the auditorium, which
Speaker 1: is very much what it was, and we're sort of
Speaker 1: double fisting drinks. And while we're doing this, we're having
Speaker 1: I would say, a fun altercation talking about which one
Speaker 1: of us is the busy and which one is the Michelle,
Speaker 1: because we had been looking across the auditorium and then
Speaker 1: they spotted Busy in Michelle and they look to be
Speaker 1: having a great time. Always, always they were having a
Speaker 1: good time. And I was like, I was like, and
Speaker 1: I was your date that night, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I will always be your date, and I want us
Speaker 1: always to ac up each other at these events. And
Speaker 1: I think we were sort of arguing because I think
Speaker 1: we both felt like I think we both and this
Speaker 1: is not trade, but I think we both wanted to
Speaker 1: be busy. I wanted to be busy, and I believe
Speaker 1: that I am busy and I know I am busy.
Speaker 1: And where were we? Then? Then? I swear to God,
Speaker 1: right behind us, this is the duo themselves, and I
Speaker 1: don't they didn't hear us? Did you hear? Did you
Speaker 1: hear didn't hear us? Oh? My god? Bow. First of all,
Speaker 1: I fucking knew who you were. And I was like yeah,
Speaker 1: and I was fully eaves dropping and we were talking
Speaker 1: about yes, you were being cute. And then I was
Speaker 1: like explaining to Michelle who everyone was, Okay, we get
Speaker 1: back to our seats. We couldn't. It was it was
Speaker 1: it was bottleneck and Busy says to us, and this
Speaker 1: was huge. She goes, you guys are really killing it
Speaker 1: with those drinks. And I was like, ed, and you
Speaker 1: know what, you want to know what I recognized. I
Speaker 1: was like, that's Mr. Energy, because I don't think you
Speaker 1: would ever say to people that you had met, you
Speaker 1: guys are killing it with those drinks. That's me. And
Speaker 1: that's saw two gay men like fucking triple fisting, like
Speaker 1: you guys are really killing it with his drinks. I wouldn't,
Speaker 1: well guess what, I would have already said it so
Speaker 1: have had you said it after me, you would have
Speaker 1: looked like a real flop. Then the iconic thing was
Speaker 1: literally we get to our seats, it's like she sits down,
Speaker 1: then she gets called up, swoops up, gives that iconic speech.
Speaker 1: And then I turned to you. What I said, that's
Speaker 1: definitely you because you're you. You are going to be
Speaker 1: giving iconic speeches. No, no, no, come September. I feel
Speaker 1: like you. I feel like you are, I feel like
Speaker 1: you could get I feel like you have an iconic
Speaker 1: speech within No, I don't. Don't you haven't you ever?
Speaker 1: Haven't you given? Haven't we all? She's given many. Icone know,
Speaker 1: just when I testified before Congress about abortion rights, that
Speaker 1: was that was an ICONO qualifies as iconic speech, and
Speaker 1: it made the raps. And so just suffice it to say,
Speaker 1: our guests today full blown icon that we are excited
Speaker 1: to have on the show. You first knew her when
Speaker 1: she played the iconic Kim Kelly on Freaks and Geeks,
Speaker 1: followed up by Dawson's Creek Babe, the underrated gem of
Speaker 1: a sitcom that was Cougar Town, for which he won
Speaker 1: the Critics Choice Award for supporting actress Okay in a
Speaker 1: comedy series. We you seen her in films like White Chicks,
Speaker 1: I Feel Pretty. He's just not that into you. I
Speaker 1: mean the iconic late night show Busy Tonight and now
Speaker 1: host the podcast Busy Phillips is doing her best. And
Speaker 1: we haven't even mentioned she's one of the quartet of
Speaker 1: our favorite show on right now, Girls five Ever, which
Speaker 1: was first season too today on everyone, Please Welcome into
Speaker 1: your ears, Busy Philips, this is the best introduction I've
Speaker 1: had on any podcast. What about awards shows? Awards shows,
Speaker 1: I feel like I don't even know what they say.
Speaker 1: They're just it's terrible. It's always dark. And now from
Speaker 1: Dawson's Creek Michelle Williams and from Cougar Town it's like, wait, Busy, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know it's but they you know, I feel like
Speaker 1: it's always it's always a miss anytime, it's always a
Speaker 1: miss whenever you're introduced. Also, like the amount of times
Speaker 1: I've had to ask them not say actress, I just
Speaker 1: say actor like I just find like the gendering. But
Speaker 1: then it's like, I don't know. Then it's all always
Speaker 1: weird because people like to put throw words in like
Speaker 1: activist mother. It's like, all right, everybody, come the fuck
Speaker 1: she's an activist to mother, And then they always follow
Speaker 1: it up with and that's the most important role. I
Speaker 1: mean it's not, but sure, just kidding, Wait, how are
Speaker 1: you feeling that this day? When they were, when they
Speaker 1: were when the renewal gun annown stand huge congratiating Thanks,
Speaker 1: Bo and I'm sad to learn from this podcast that
Speaker 1: you are not a fan of yourself. He's on this show,
Speaker 1: he was so good, you were amazing. What are you
Speaker 1: fucking talking about? He did it, He did it, so
Speaker 1: this could happen. I no, no, no, not at all.
Speaker 1: I think back on the day that you that that
Speaker 1: you and I shared a scene and I was out
Speaker 1: of it. No, but but this is the thing. It's like,
Speaker 1: if you're a pro, if you're like busy Phillips level,
Speaker 1: even if you're out of it, you show up strap throughout. Yes, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: here's because COVID times we're filming COVID and I woke
Speaker 1: up covid. This is January, January height of the girl.
Speaker 1: If she really was. Plus, I have two children who
Speaker 1: were in person school now they were like potted and
Speaker 1: they had like a whole protocol and everything. I woke
Speaker 1: up Monday morning and I was like, she came for me,
Speaker 1: like this is it. We're done, We're done, we got it.
Speaker 1: And I called production and I was like, this is
Speaker 1: what's happening. I'm not coming in and I'm do the
Speaker 1: responsible thing, of course, but I was like I'm gonna
Speaker 1: even though by the way I could have gotten the
Speaker 1: free test at work. I was like, I'm not coming in.
Speaker 1: I'm going to go to the place here that's like
Speaker 1: the rapid PCR tests. You get your result. At that point,
Speaker 1: it was like, you get your result in an hour,
Speaker 1: was the fastest you could do it? Um, But I'm
Speaker 1: going to tell you I'm sure I have COVID um
Speaker 1: And I was pretty much freaking the funk out, and
Speaker 1: we held the kids home from school and I went,
Speaker 1: I mean, I can't be I'm not an irresponsible person,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Because they felt fine, They're
Speaker 1: like this is dumb. I'm like, well, we'll see, will
Speaker 1: know in an hour. But I also did feel I
Speaker 1: felt like I've had like chronic sinus is guys is boring.
Speaker 1: But I didn't feel like this is a strep throat situation.
Speaker 1: And then I thought, well, is COVID that is that?
Speaker 1: What that is? I don't know. I didn't have So anyway,
Speaker 1: test came back next Oh and guess who I saw? Um?
Speaker 1: Oh my cut name. Yes, on the Upper West you know,
Speaker 1: iconic fucking New Yorker and the documentary with Martin Scorsese,
Speaker 1: It's on the Straight. I swear to god. I drove.
Speaker 1: I drove up which, by the way, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: a real really bitch, and I had my car shipped
Speaker 1: here and everywhere. I love it. So I drive up
Speaker 1: to the COVID test place, get out of my car.
Speaker 1: I was like, you gotta be fucking kidding me framly
Speaker 1: walking down the street, and I was like if I
Speaker 1: didn't think like that, I had COVID obviously and like,
Speaker 1: annoy the ship out of her. But anyway, so I
Speaker 1: was like, I'm gonna protect an icon. I'm not going
Speaker 1: to say hello. When and got the COVID test, it
Speaker 1: was negative. And then I was like, well, then I'm
Speaker 1: pretty sure I have stupped throat. And I went to
Speaker 1: this doctor that they like, I don't have any doctors
Speaker 1: here yet, still bad move on. My My kids have pediatricians, dentists,
Speaker 1: my dog has a vet. Oh yeah, I hope everyone
Speaker 1: up and like, I'm like, I don't know where the
Speaker 1: funk I go. Actually I did get a great guy
Speaker 1: no from Michelle, so all I think, you know, so
Speaker 1: I'm that I take care of. But so the studio
Speaker 1: or the production sent me to some doctor. I went
Speaker 1: to his office. It was so bizarre. You know those
Speaker 1: studio doctors are always was one once and it was like, huh,
Speaker 1: there's like a lot of bits. It's the the offices
Speaker 1: are wacky whacky. Was this in Gredwitch everywhere? It was
Speaker 1: right by n y U, So you know I'm talking
Speaker 1: about you know what I'm talking about. He gave me
Speaker 1: a talking to when I went for an insurance physical
Speaker 1: before North from Queens and he was just like, he's like,
Speaker 1: you know, you gotta stop smoking. I don't know what
Speaker 1: tell you. I know and I have, but he's just
Speaker 1: love the no no, but he narrated me no no,
Speaker 1: no, no no no no no no no no no. It
Speaker 1: wasn't I'm sorry busy, no, no, I it wasn't that
Speaker 1: I was smoking. Was that I I said that? Um?
Speaker 1: I said that I have some chest pain, like uh,
Speaker 1: some chest pain. And then he was like what's this
Speaker 1: about chest pain? And I was like, oh, you know, um,
Speaker 1: I don't really have it. It's just like I just
Speaker 1: get like a chest cough every now and he was like, well,
Speaker 1: that's not what that question is asking on the forum.
Speaker 1: So I know want you to lie on these forms
Speaker 1: because that becomes like an issue for and then he
Speaker 1: just like it was a form issue, and so he
Speaker 1: just like, but this is this is the same doctor.
Speaker 1: I think busy like dusty, yes, okay, yes, sorry, I
Speaker 1: know exactly. It is percent him and I went in
Speaker 1: and he's like, tell me what's happening. And I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm I must have strap throat. My COVID test was negative.
Speaker 1: And he's like, adults don't get strap throat. I'd be
Speaker 1: very I'd be very surprised if you get. If you have,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm so sorry. I'm almost positive that I have
Speaker 1: strap throat. And and also I've been an adult for
Speaker 1: twenty years and I've had strep throat as an adult.
Speaker 1: What are you talking about? He cultured my way way,
Speaker 1: so he cultures my throat. And he's like, well, we'll
Speaker 1: get we'll have the results in forty eight to seventy
Speaker 1: two hours. I was like, what that long? Why would
Speaker 1: it take so long to say that was strep? That
Speaker 1: is how long it takes. Well, it does not math,
Speaker 1: it does test I've had and I've been poked and
Speaker 1: prodded back in my throat for years and years. I
Speaker 1: used I had stripped through all the time when I
Speaker 1: was a kid, my kids pediatrician runs it in fifteen minutes.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm not on board with this doctor anymore. Ever
Speaker 1: since it kind of took a turn of like adults
Speaker 1: don't get Strepps. No, but he like gave me and
Speaker 1: he's like, oh yeah, wow, really does look like strap
Speaker 1: And I was like, yes, I have. So he gave
Speaker 1: me an antibiotic while we weeded for the results that
Speaker 1: I should just start taking and then and then I
Speaker 1: was like, what should I do now in any other
Speaker 1: work situation I've ever been in, and I've been on
Speaker 1: television shows since I was an infant basically, I mean
Speaker 1: nineteen Uh, if you're sick or like, say, have just
Speaker 1: given birth, like you go immediately back to shooting. Any
Speaker 1: think if you have the stomach flu like you, they
Speaker 1: give you steroids and you go back to work like
Speaker 1: I have worked through fucking everything and wait not but
Speaker 1: you know they don't want productions. I actually think this
Speaker 1: has to do with Cleopatra, because do you guys know
Speaker 1: story with Cleopatra? With know we want to know and
Speaker 1: the reader should know. There's an incredible article. I believe
Speaker 1: it was in Vanity Fair like in the mid nineties,
Speaker 1: maybe early odds, and it was about like the disaster
Speaker 1: of the financial ruin like the movie Cleopatra. But part
Speaker 1: of the issue was that at the time, Elizabeth Taylor
Speaker 1: declared that she would not work for the week before,
Speaker 1: the week during, or the week after her menzies, so
Speaker 1: essentially she could only work a week every month. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was like the days were sort of like negotiable,
Speaker 1: but it was like it was like basically like three
Speaker 1: weeks out of the month she was on avails due
Speaker 1: to her period. That's iconic. I can't I can't work
Speaker 1: when I the week before, during, and after I come exactly. Okay, hell,
Speaker 1: long was production it was? It was you have to
Speaker 1: look up this article. It was like exorbitantly long. It
Speaker 1: ended with like the sale of half of Culver City
Speaker 1: so that they could get out of debt for the movie.
Speaker 1: It is like bonkers, like they like, who are Sony
Speaker 1: who made the movie or whatever? I think it must
Speaker 1: have been son Fox, Oh Fox, Okay, so they like
Speaker 1: basically owned all of Culver City and then had to
Speaker 1: just sell it off because of the debt of Cleopatra.
Speaker 1: Like the movie budget was something at the time like
Speaker 1: three hundred million dollars, which like in today's market is
Speaker 1: like two billion, like you know what I mean, Like
Speaker 1: that's like that's not those aren't real numbers or math,
Speaker 1: but it was it's like fucking bonkers. It's insane. So
Speaker 1: you think that like production schedule, I think insurance stuff. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think it dates back to that. I think that
Speaker 1: the studios then we're just like oh, mother fuck no,
Speaker 1: and like we're putting this ship on lockdown and like
Speaker 1: you are coming to work rain or shine, and that's it.
Speaker 1: I don't know this pilot that I just did. This girl,
Speaker 1: I think it might be a scheduling thing too, because
Speaker 1: it's so hard, especially when you're a tight schedule. This
Speaker 1: girl was having one of the worst migraines I've ever ed,
Speaker 1: and it was like it was like a night shoot,
Speaker 1: so it was like you don't want to deal with
Speaker 1: a migraine at any point, but especially when it's late
Speaker 1: at night. It was one of those things where it
Speaker 1: was like ten minutes before she could feel it coming
Speaker 1: and she's like, okay, I have to leave and get
Speaker 1: home now. She's like some dealt with migraines, and they
Speaker 1: did have to like find a way to shoot her
Speaker 1: out because it was that bad, but like no one
Speaker 1: should have to do that, but they do, but they,
Speaker 1: but they do, like I mean they just I once
Speaker 1: on Cougar Town, Um, I had like completely thrown out
Speaker 1: my back like in a way like I don't know
Speaker 1: if you guys are pretty young, I don't know if
Speaker 1: you've ever done this, but I had also had Bertie.
Speaker 1: Like Bertie was only like a year and a half old,
Speaker 1: and so my stomach muscles were still very weak. Apparently
Speaker 1: why you throw your back out, um or like especially
Speaker 1: like moms do. I could not get off of the
Speaker 1: floor and I was like tears streaming down my face,
Speaker 1: crying in pain, and like the prop guy gave me
Speaker 1: like a valium or something, and I or like some
Speaker 1: muscle were like a soma and I like just always
Speaker 1: the prop guy, I mean always the best, the best. Um.
Speaker 1: But no, I was in so much hand off the floor.
Speaker 1: No I wasn't, but I I had to like rally
Speaker 1: and go do the scenes and then go laid on
Speaker 1: the floor and cry and but so anyways, it was
Speaker 1: like the shock of my life. Also, I was so
Speaker 1: sad that I missed that, like missed most of the
Speaker 1: episode on Girls. I've ever the shock of my life
Speaker 1: when production was like, due to COVID protocols, you must
Speaker 1: stay until like forty eight hours after you start taking
Speaker 1: the antibiotics or whatever. And I was like, are you
Speaker 1: what am I supposed to do? I've never not, I've never. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's funny that you say that, because Bowen I was
Speaker 1: texting him the whole time he was doing cause I
Speaker 1: was so excited he was doing it, and I was like,
Speaker 1: it's Busy there, and he was like, well, she's sick.
Speaker 1: And then so in when in watching the episode, there's
Speaker 1: one part where they they cut over to like this
Speaker 1: standon who's sort of like in your visage, and it's
Speaker 1: just like this, she's seven feet tall and see it's
Speaker 1: just so funny because she's in like the like work
Speaker 1: around and you're just sort of like she was just
Speaker 1: like perched up, I like sitting on a box and
Speaker 1: you're like, is that Busy looks like the clocket knew it, o' clocket,
Speaker 1: because you had said that Busy was sick, and so
Speaker 1: I knew that even though I was in the room.
Speaker 1: I was like, that's there. There's like there's the characters,
Speaker 1: there's Busy. There's wait, wait, I'm such a bad viewer.
Speaker 1: What's wait, wait, what's what Dawn? No, Donna is Donna
Speaker 1: Sarah Gloria as Paula summer summer, summer you free summer
Speaker 1: in summer in calvs summer. And I was going through
Speaker 1: that one scene and then I just I just remember thinking,
Speaker 1: I'm sucking this up. I'm sucking this up. I'm sucking
Speaker 1: this up. Like I'm just like no, no, no, this
Speaker 1: is We're just bringing this back to like the day
Speaker 1: that I worked with Busy, feeling like I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm not doing a good job, but this is that's
Speaker 1: just me that we don't we don't have to unpack this.
Speaker 1: I am like gonna figure it out by the time
Speaker 1: I like go back to work. It's it's fine, it's fine.
Speaker 1: I had a lot of I felt weird that day.
Speaker 1: I was nervous because I had been away from work
Speaker 1: and I felt so insecure about that. And then I
Speaker 1: was like sort of just I felt I hadn't really
Speaker 1: eaten anything in many many days, definitely hadn't had any
Speaker 1: alcohol in like six days. I was very skinny. Guys,
Speaker 1: that one scene just f I have to say, my COVID,
Speaker 1: my COVID day has has been tough. It's been tough.
Speaker 1: It's been tough for all of us. Yeah, I think
Speaker 1: I think that's why we're so We opened the show
Speaker 1: today being fixated on like, Okay, gotta get ready for Fireland.
Speaker 1: I was listening to that obviously. I was sitting here
Speaker 1: absorbing the moment and I and I feel like it's
Speaker 1: just the last frontier, isn't it Just like letting, letting
Speaker 1: it can go, and like being like, this is it.
Speaker 1: I love it. I'm healthy, I love I love it
Speaker 1: when I see it on other people. But we're not there.
Speaker 1: Just it's hard to get there inside your own head.
Speaker 1: And then I always I remind myself, and I think
Speaker 1: this is such a good thing for everyone to remind themselves.
Speaker 1: Just no one is thinking about you as much as
Speaker 1: you are ever ever, except if you're famous. Thought that's
Speaker 1: not true. So sometimes I'm like, I look like ship,
Speaker 1: and then somebody tweets me like it's not busy Phillips
Speaker 1: that hugoes. She looked like ship, you know, And then
Speaker 1: you're like, well, you didn't have to tag me, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? The tag is always a huge
Speaker 1: question mark from me. I'm like, why if you wanted
Speaker 1: to hate me, you could have done that in private.
Speaker 1: I really didn't need to know. I don't know who
Speaker 1: it helps. I mean it helps them because it gets
Speaker 1: your attention. That's the kicker, isn't it. I think this
Speaker 1: is a particular summer during which people are extra are
Speaker 1: thoughtful about just um great. It's so you're re emerging
Speaker 1: from a cocoon. You want to look good, and you
Speaker 1: want to pretend like you were one of those people
Speaker 1: that was like I spent the whole time working on
Speaker 1: me and getting better and like losing forty pounds, and
Speaker 1: really you're like I spent the whole time eating tates
Speaker 1: and drinking bottles of rose at night. Like, well, that's
Speaker 1: just my experience. I can't project for you, but you know,
Speaker 1: I think it's like a little bit. People feel this
Speaker 1: this pressure of of re emerging looking better than ever.
Speaker 1: But I never had looked better ever in my life.
Speaker 1: It is the hottest I've ever fucking been in February. Wait,
Speaker 1: oh so like right before, yeah, I was the best
Speaker 1: my body, my body. I literally this is not a joke.
Speaker 1: Like in early March, I remember looking in the mirror
Speaker 1: and I was like that's what you always wanted. You like,
Speaker 1: that's it. I was like, you look great, you look great.
Speaker 1: Talk about this, talk about this moment because I want
Speaker 1: I want you to look bottle this, Bottle this up.
Speaker 1: What was the what was the reason for it? What
Speaker 1: made you think? What made you satisfy? Because this is
Speaker 1: the thing that I think. I'm always looking in the mirror,
Speaker 1: boy so, and I always about you think like I
Speaker 1: don't know. It just was like it all came together.
Speaker 1: I just was looking great. I had been working out
Speaker 1: so much and like, but it was like I had
Speaker 1: like let so much food stuff go, like in terms
Speaker 1: of I threw my scales out like a couple of
Speaker 1: months earlier, and then like I just felt all this freedom.
Speaker 1: And I was like still eating nachos at Petty Cash
Speaker 1: on Monday nights and still like feeling like I was like,
Speaker 1: I was like I've turned into like Cameron Diaz of nine,
Speaker 1: where I'm like I'm eating a burger. But I looked
Speaker 1: like this, like I just had this thing, and I
Speaker 1: was like, this is it. It's what you've always wanted.
Speaker 1: It's balanced. Like I didn't fucking I wasn't like like
Speaker 1: having sugar craving, like stuffing my face was. I wasn't
Speaker 1: binging binging binging, so but like, you know, not in
Speaker 1: a way where I would purge. Just I would go
Speaker 1: through periods of time in my life since I was
Speaker 1: a young actor first told to lose weight, where um,
Speaker 1: young act orror who's a woman in this industry who
Speaker 1: was told to lose weight? Um, that I would like
Speaker 1: go through periods of time where I'd be really really
Speaker 1: really strict and regimented and be like, um, still just
Speaker 1: like a normal sized person, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And then I would like fall off the wagon and
Speaker 1: binge and then whatever. And then I had my kids
Speaker 1: and I was like I can't continue this. This is
Speaker 1: fucked for them because they're, um, well I have like
Speaker 1: a little girl and then my non binary teen. Um
Speaker 1: but still like body issues or body issues like you
Speaker 1: guys are proof that it doesn't it doesn't matter your gender. Um.
Speaker 1: So yeah, Like I just was trying to get a
Speaker 1: handle on it for many years and like I was like,
Speaker 1: I did it, and then my body, my body never
Speaker 1: looked better, and then I sank into it. So I'm
Speaker 1: curious because for me, for me, it was immediate, like
Speaker 1: when they told us we were going home from work
Speaker 1: and that we wouldn't be back for even two weeks.
Speaker 1: I remember it. For me, it was immediate. I think
Speaker 1: I said right away. I was like, oh, unfortunately, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna let myself go because there was those people that
Speaker 1: were in my ear sort of saying like, hey, just
Speaker 1: so you know, it might also be a very long time,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I'm not willing to believe that,
Speaker 1: but I am going to enjoy in any way that
Speaker 1: I can, this like time at home. I'm going to
Speaker 1: comfort myself from the horrors of what's going out there with.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be eating pizza while I'm sitting here binging.
Speaker 1: I'll say again, thirty one seasons of Survivor. So that's
Speaker 1: the whole thing. Well, there's forty and there's like nine
Speaker 1: flop seasons that I didn't watch, so I watched all
Speaker 1: the good ones good quote unquote, and so during that time,
Speaker 1: it was like cheeseburgers, pizza. You want to know a
Speaker 1: story about Jeff Probest. Obviously, um, Jeff Prost Probest is
Speaker 1: the nicest, sweetest and uh, he's married to a friend
Speaker 1: of mine and our kids all used to go to
Speaker 1: the same school in Los Angeles. Although Lisa's kids are older,
Speaker 1: his wife's kids are are are a bit older than
Speaker 1: my kids. But we would often end up on spring
Speaker 1: break at the exact same time in the same place,
Speaker 1: like at this and uh. And I've known Lisa for
Speaker 1: a long time because before she was married to Jeff
Speaker 1: Probest I mean, I mean a long time, like her
Speaker 1: best friend forever is a is a woman that I
Speaker 1: was friends with, like through acting or whatever. So I've
Speaker 1: known his wife for a long time. So anyway, so
Speaker 1: we would like hang out on vacation on spring break
Speaker 1: and at this resort that we, you know, would see
Speaker 1: each other at like l A l A springbreak vibes. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he would hold for the kids that there is of art.
Speaker 1: He would do for for free, I mean for fun,
Speaker 1: just for fun. He would do a full survivor home
Speaker 1: like day for the kids, like staying at the place
Speaker 1: in Hawaii. When you get ready, it was cut. It
Speaker 1: was just like the cutest, nicest he just was Like
Speaker 1: first of all, it was like the greatest step dad
Speaker 1: that I've ever seen. A look all of it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: your hat still was was he was he in the
Speaker 1: look like even though he was on vacation. Did he
Speaker 1: at least bring like the look like was he in
Speaker 1: his denim sort of cargo pants? Like yeah, kind of, yeah,
Speaker 1: a little bit. I mean he's like maybe a little
Speaker 1: bit cooler like life like like, but he's definitely like
Speaker 1: hot dad vibes. Yeah, sure, like he It was just
Speaker 1: like the first year because it was years that we
Speaker 1: would see them on spring break and the first year
Speaker 1: where I was like, wait, wait, so where is he going?
Speaker 1: And she's like, oh, he does this thing or he
Speaker 1: does survivor for the kids staying here, and it's just like,
Speaker 1: you know, I was like, are you fucking kidding me?
Speaker 1: That's the greatest thing ever heard in my life? Like
Speaker 1: that sweet? Oh those kids are going to look back
Speaker 1: on that and have a good memory that he was
Speaker 1: very sweet and like all the kids, Like Cricket when
Speaker 1: she first met him was probably I mean like two
Speaker 1: and a half or something like that, my little one
Speaker 1: who's now almost eight, and she just always was like
Speaker 1: who's like she just loved him. Um, he's very lovable.
Speaker 1: That that's like, that's like like you find out that
Speaker 1: the Santa that came to your house to play Santa
Speaker 1: was the real Santa Santa. Yeah sure anyway, yeah, I
Speaker 1: was saying like it for me, the COVID thing was
Speaker 1: like it was immediate. I was like, no, I'm meaning
Speaker 1: whatever I want now. It was my my comfort food
Speaker 1: and survivor was it was. It happened immediately I got me.
Speaker 1: I was like, I wake up every morning at six,
Speaker 1: I work out, I shower and then put on a
Speaker 1: full outfit and make up if I feel like I
Speaker 1: was living in And then I was like and then
Speaker 1: we start school and I'm a teacher now, and that
Speaker 1: like it was such a crazy was such a slow
Speaker 1: burn for me, like where all of a sudden, I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I have four thousand emails I haven't returned,
Speaker 1: and but like my kids nailing their project for the
Speaker 1: building the rainbow out of household objects that we have
Speaker 1: to take a picture of and upload to this website
Speaker 1: that the school like just came up with like two
Speaker 1: and a half seconds ago, so that we can like
Speaker 1: track their things. And then I have to teach her
Speaker 1: how to multiply numbers, and like it was truly a
Speaker 1: wild journey. But my my spiral in terms of like
Speaker 1: oh I'm fucking done happened in June, I would say.
Speaker 1: In June, I was like, that was when it was
Speaker 1: hardest for me, because that was when it really sank
Speaker 1: in that this was like, yeah, well we had our
Speaker 1: when when LA started to like kind of open back
Speaker 1: up again, our kids like nanny who this is is
Speaker 1: this relatable content our child kiss nanny who we had
Speaker 1: obviously paid to stay home for those three months, like
Speaker 1: the quarantine three months. And then like, by the way,
Speaker 1: at like a school zoom meeting, we find out like
Speaker 1: people are asking questions about their babysitters and childcare. And
Speaker 1: I was like, what people are start coming and working
Speaker 1: in your what the fuck I had? I was like, everybody,
Speaker 1: I obviously I work, Mark works, we have two children. Um,
Speaker 1: I had like a housekeeper that came twice a week,
Speaker 1: and I had our kids like longtime nanny and both
Speaker 1: of them. I was like, and and by the way,
Speaker 1: my assistant Raymond, who like whatever, I was like, everybody
Speaker 1: stay at home, and I continue to pay you and
Speaker 1: don't fucking come to the threshold. Do not even come
Speaker 1: near us. And I we were doing it all ourselves,
Speaker 1: like for a second, one second, in the very beginning
Speaker 1: of the pandemic, I said I called Casey and I
Speaker 1: was like, let's just start doing like a version of
Speaker 1: Busy tonight, but like from my house and like we
Speaker 1: can just do and it was so fun and it'll
Speaker 1: be like like on zoom we can just like or
Speaker 1: not zoom on Instagram live or whatever and we'll just
Speaker 1: like post. It would be so fun, you guys. I was.
Speaker 1: That was like I literally was like crying under a
Speaker 1: pile of laundry, two kids, so many dishes, and I
Speaker 1: was like, this is I can't do this. This is insane.
Speaker 1: I'm not that's insane. The teacher that the having to
Speaker 1: be a teacher of it all that was a horror that.
Speaker 1: I mean, me having a bad time is just like
Speaker 1: it was so I didn't have any responsibilities really to
Speaker 1: have children and then to have to teach them, and
Speaker 1: then you have to realize, like how difficult all that.
Speaker 1: It is, Like the math that they learned fun out.
Speaker 1: But by the way, my kids like for like like
Speaker 1: crickets school was teaching it was Singapore math, which is
Speaker 1: like a kind of math we don't know because we
Speaker 1: were not taught. But it's about number bonding. What yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's about number bonding and it's that's
Speaker 1: as you guys, that's as much as I know. I
Speaker 1: swear god, that is literally and I was like, do
Speaker 1: I need to take a crash course in Singapore? Mouth like,
Speaker 1: I don't fucking know how to do this. This is insane.
Speaker 1: My older kid, Birdie like weirdly was this is I
Speaker 1: mean talk about like fucking making lemon made out of lemons? Oh,
Speaker 1: you guys, my older child, Bertie had been this is
Speaker 1: it's actually not funny at all. But my older kid,
Speaker 1: but my older kid, Bertie had been bullied so horribly
Speaker 1: in the school that they were in when they came
Speaker 1: out at or at age ten, and it was just
Speaker 1: like a fucking nightmare. And so it got to a
Speaker 1: really on and the school handled it poorly, and I
Speaker 1: got the l g pt Q Center involved in l
Speaker 1: A and it was just like I was talking to
Speaker 1: lawyers and they were like, well, that's what you get
Speaker 1: when you go to private school school. You have no
Speaker 1: recourse in blah blah blah blah blah. And I was
Speaker 1: just like and so literally two weeks before the pandemic happened,
Speaker 1: like officially was called they called it um. When they
Speaker 1: called it um, we had or two two and a
Speaker 1: half weeks, we had pulled Bertie out of school and
Speaker 1: had set them up with these like tutors that we're incredible.
Speaker 1: But because basically I said to the school, like, you
Speaker 1: have two choices. You're gonna let my child finish with
Speaker 1: private twouters or I'm going to like be on the
Speaker 1: cover of People magazine. Um And also, by the way,
Speaker 1: I didn't want to find There was no fucking way
Speaker 1: I wanted to do that. Like I didn't want to
Speaker 1: I wasn't ever going to do that. By the way,
Speaker 1: I was never going to just f y I but
Speaker 1: I was never going to do But I just was like,
Speaker 1: you have to let us go, and you have to
Speaker 1: like let us finish the school year without you and
Speaker 1: without them being subjected to this fucking torture. And um
Speaker 1: so they had agreed to that. So we have these
Speaker 1: private tutors that were like already set up tutoring Bertie.
Speaker 1: So then when the pandemic happened, and it's like through
Speaker 1: this company that does this for kids who either like
Speaker 1: are they like professional kids they like work with actors
Speaker 1: or sports players, or when kids are in crisis like
Speaker 1: was in our case, and like needed to get the
Speaker 1: you know out um. But so then when the pandem
Speaker 1: it happened, Bernie had like this schedule with these it
Speaker 1: was all set up online already to go because they
Speaker 1: have like kids that travel for work, and they like
Speaker 1: didn't miss a beat and literally it was like we
Speaker 1: didn't have to do anything. It was so seamless and
Speaker 1: Bernie just like faced all of the classes and had
Speaker 1: the greatest like was literally you guys when I mean
Speaker 1: when like George Floyd was murdered, then Bernie was talking
Speaker 1: to their English teacher about it, and the English teacher
Speaker 1: was like, I'm going to change the curriculum for the
Speaker 1: rest of the year and we're going to read um
Speaker 1: Chained and like this book and this book, and then
Speaker 1: we're gonna like talk about it. Was I was like, Oh,
Speaker 1: this is what's wrong with education in America. It's not
Speaker 1: like it's not adaptable and it's not tailored to children's
Speaker 1: actual needs. It's just like a one size fits all situation.
Speaker 1: Even if you are paying for it. It fucking sucks. Um,
Speaker 1: I know, but that thing is for habitively expensive like
Speaker 1: what we were doing at the time, And it was
Speaker 1: only because I was like I don't care if I
Speaker 1: like go into credit card debt. I just have to
Speaker 1: make sure this person is okay um. And so anyway,
Speaker 1: so they did like killed it. They like did great
Speaker 1: during school at the end of that thing. And the
Speaker 1: point being I got to June and they finished school
Speaker 1: and I collapsed, Rose and Tates took over my life
Speaker 1: and I just have never looked back. And then even
Speaker 1: for like when I was a little bit on the show,
Speaker 1: I was like, maybe I should try to know, but
Speaker 1: maybe wearing these like outfits and ship and I'm just like, well,
Speaker 1: oh no. And also I did want so I was
Speaker 1: moving to New York, like kind of a huge fucking
Speaker 1: deal for you because there l a I am LA
Speaker 1: through and through at home, but the whole family was
Speaker 1: you marked the kids. Yeah, well basically, like I said,
Speaker 1: we'd had some trauma and I and I actually think,
Speaker 1: like I don't want to cry, but I actually do
Speaker 1: think that like for Bertie that it is like, you know,
Speaker 1: it's like big tea trauma like for what they experienced
Speaker 1: when they were coming out, and and so it was
Speaker 1: hard there, and like it's hard living with ghosts, and
Speaker 1: it's hard living in a place where like everything reminds
Speaker 1: you of a thing that you went through and came
Speaker 1: and then um, and there were some other extenuating circumstances
Speaker 1: from my personal life, UM that I don't want to
Speaker 1: get into you, but that's you know, and uh and
Speaker 1: then those and then the fires started last summer, like
Speaker 1: the end of the summer, and I couldn't breathe and
Speaker 1: I just had like a like a bird flying away
Speaker 1: before an earthquake or something. I just like turned to
Speaker 1: Mark and was like, we have to get the funk
Speaker 1: out of here, like right now. And you know, we
Speaker 1: flew with the kids and the dog and like a
Speaker 1: bunch of stuff to New York and we were only
Speaker 1: supposed to be here for three weeks. We're like, we're
Speaker 1: just gonna let things simmer down cool and in those
Speaker 1: three weeks. I also you have to remember, like fall
Speaker 1: before the election, it was it was I I left
Speaker 1: l A two at that time. It was and it
Speaker 1: was like being being in the city when the fires
Speaker 1: were happening and everything was happening. You felt like you
Speaker 1: couldn't go anywhere. And I remember what what you were,
Speaker 1: what you were going through with your family, Like I
Speaker 1: can't even imagine that was real tough. It was really tough.
Speaker 1: And then and also like I was so terrified that
Speaker 1: Trump was going to get reelected that I was like,
Speaker 1: we have to be close to a Canadian border. Like
Speaker 1: I was like thinking in terms of like how am
Speaker 1: I going to survive and apocalypse, Like I like bought
Speaker 1: property in the middle of no you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: Like I went, I WENTZ. It's like I like doom.
Speaker 1: I went like full doom step I support, I support,
Speaker 1: and I was just like just in case, we've got it,
Speaker 1: like you know. Then and then like week two, Tina
Speaker 1: Fey literally texted me and was like I have I
Speaker 1: was gonna question, Oh my god, wow, because I had
Speaker 1: heard about the show while the room was happening with
Speaker 1: like our friend Matt Whitaker. But then so sweet and
Speaker 1: also it's the best handwriting I've ever seen. He's like
Speaker 1: a he's like a font. He's like, yeah, he's amazing.
Speaker 1: But he but the new you guys moved to New
Speaker 1: York sort of I didn't even Owen wasn't even on
Speaker 1: my writer. I didn't know about the show. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: And then not not only that, but like not for
Speaker 1: it to be just like any job, but like the
Speaker 1: great job. You deserve it. Oh, you deserve it. No,
Speaker 1: you are the best. And you know what, I always
Speaker 1: every time, every time you have like a great project
Speaker 1: or a great or a great opportunity, I'm always like,
Speaker 1: I I just I'm like so excited that this is
Speaker 1: a second season and you get to be like so
Speaker 1: great on it, and I just feel like all the
Speaker 1: way going back to like obviously freaking geeks, like I
Speaker 1: love that show when it was on, and like just
Speaker 1: knowing how fucking funny you were on Cougar Town, I
Speaker 1: was just like I was like, and then I loved
Speaker 1: the Late night show. I mean, I just I'm such
Speaker 1: a fan. I always root for you and like just
Speaker 1: so that this happened and that that it came together
Speaker 1: after such a fucked moment. But all of this for
Speaker 1: a people illustrate, but all of this really illustrates how
Speaker 1: you probably are so fucking resourceful, because I would have
Speaker 1: never I don't know. I'm I'm staying at my sister's
Speaker 1: right now, and I'm like looking around at my nieces
Speaker 1: and my and my mom, who's also like tired from
Speaker 1: like just like making sure they're okay, and like make
Speaker 1: sure they don't die. Second to sex that, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I could never be a parent and do what I'm doing.
Speaker 1: That I could never. I could never do it. And
Speaker 1: maybe someday it's the hardest thing I could possibly think of.
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's shockingly fucking hard. It's like so
Speaker 1: hard that you're like, no, no, no, parenting is hard.
Speaker 1: I get it. And then you're in it, like yeah, oh,
Speaker 1: I would kill myself, but I can't because I'm a parent, Like,
Speaker 1: I can't actually fucking do that. That's not an option
Speaker 1: because I gotta stay. That's rule of culture number forty nine.
Speaker 1: I would kill kill myself, but because I'm a parent,
Speaker 1: it's like it is so hard and it's so funny too,
Speaker 1: because I had Bertie when I was fairly young for
Speaker 1: l a New York standards. Um it was twenty eight,
Speaker 1: and it was because of the writer's strike that was happening,
Speaker 1: not even a joke. I literally was like, I'm probably
Speaker 1: not gonna work for a year, may as well just
Speaker 1: like have this baby now, and got pregnant immediately. Um,
Speaker 1: because I also am like, if you look at me
Speaker 1: the wrong way, I'm pregnant. Uh. And and Bertie showed up.
Speaker 1: So I was like twenty nine years old, had this baby.
Speaker 1: I got cast in Cougar Town when Bertie was six
Speaker 1: and a half months old. The pie did the pilot.
Speaker 1: And you know, I now have almost thirteen year old
Speaker 1: child who's fucking First of all, you guys have no
Speaker 1: idea about this generation. They are truly wild. Here's what
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say to you. They do not care if
Speaker 1: they smell. They don't care if they have hair. Okay,
Speaker 1: I care if they smell, though, no not I do too,
Speaker 1: And and I'm here to tell you they don't give
Speaker 1: a fuck not a hair. They don't brush your fucking teeth,
Speaker 1: they don't fish your hair. You know, he's not. It's
Speaker 1: really not my experience with my teens friends and my
Speaker 1: teen they are It is like an evolution or something
Speaker 1: of men. It is like that body stuff that we
Speaker 1: talked about earlier. We all have ingrained in us, do it. No?
Speaker 1: I don't think so, and I literally don't think so. Unbelievable.
Speaker 1: I mean certain kids, I mean, these kids, like these
Speaker 1: kids of this this version awareness, kids of the awareness
Speaker 1: I mean. Okay, So, for instance, so my child obviously
Speaker 1: knew they were gay when they were ten years old.
Speaker 1: Came out to me and like, honestly, I know I've
Speaker 1: read the books that not supposed to say this, but
Speaker 1: like not a surprise to me, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: like supposed to be their own journey and autonomy and
Speaker 1: all that. But like obviously I was like duh so um.
Speaker 1: But that being said, like just like the whole awareness
Speaker 1: and knowledge of all of the things. A friend of
Speaker 1: mine is on the board at the lgbt Q Center
Speaker 1: in Los Angeles, which is like honestly one of the
Speaker 1: greatest places on earth. They are doing such incredible work there.
Speaker 1: Every day, teenagers, children, children fucking show up on their doorstep.
Speaker 1: They had to build an entire wing for kids, like
Speaker 1: because they show up and they're like, I have nowhere else,
Speaker 1: you know, I bought this bus ticket. I had nowhere
Speaker 1: else to go. Um, my friend is on the board there.
Speaker 1: Bertie had this like genius idea for a fundraise, Like
Speaker 1: not a fundraise, I but like a like a charity.
Speaker 1: Charity sounds weird. I don't even like charity anymore, but
Speaker 1: like just an idea of they saw how much like
Speaker 1: ship I was getting sent by brands and stuff that
Speaker 1: I wasn't using the products and like makeup and nail
Speaker 1: polish and ship and Bertie was like, you know, the
Speaker 1: trans teens at the lgbt Q Center should like be
Speaker 1: able to have some nice stuff too, Like they deserve
Speaker 1: Charlotte Tillbury. They don't they you know, they shouldn't just
Speaker 1: have to go to CBS. And I was like, give
Speaker 1: the teens doctor Sturm. Give these teens doctor Sturm, and okay, Bertie, okay.
Speaker 1: So Bertie started collecting from like wrote this little letter
Speaker 1: and I sent it out to like some friends and
Speaker 1: like influencer type humans that I'm friends with, and started
Speaker 1: collecting all this makeup and we donated it to the
Speaker 1: teens at the lgbt Q Center for Pride last year,
Speaker 1: even though COVID but um, it was like four billion
Speaker 1: boxes and like part of the thing was like I
Speaker 1: was like, you have to organize it, Bertie into lake
Speaker 1: types of makeup and like I just was like I
Speaker 1: kind of just like made them do more work than
Speaker 1: you know, whatever. So we dropped it off and my
Speaker 1: friend Kareem, who's like a board member there, gave us
Speaker 1: it was like we're going to do a tour with
Speaker 1: the president whatever. So we like we're walking around and
Speaker 1: Bertie was like pointing out flags and like pointing out things,
Speaker 1: and Kareem was like, um, yeah, I don't even I
Speaker 1: don't know what that one is. I am. I am
Speaker 1: learning things on this tour. And I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: they know fucking everything. I don't know if it's TikTok
Speaker 1: or fucking twitch or what TikTok is teaching everyone teaching children.
Speaker 1: I'm off of it. I'm not on it, but sure
Speaker 1: I do have to watch it sometimes. But that are
Speaker 1: you saying that they are learning things at the expense? Well,
Speaker 1: I feel like, do they do do these? Do they
Speaker 1: not care about how each other? How? How how other
Speaker 1: people smell? Is that I have no way of phrasing this. Well,
Speaker 1: but it's like they don't care how they smelled? Do
Speaker 1: they care about what was important to the older generations?
Speaker 1: Is just not important to them? You want to know
Speaker 1: why because they are right and the fact that we
Speaker 1: didn't do a great job of keeping the world going.
Speaker 1: If honestly, if I get it, I get it because
Speaker 1: if I'm gen Z and I'm looking at older people,
Speaker 1: I'm like, you're gonna tell me fuck you. But also
Speaker 1: like that's the whole thing. I mean, not not the
Speaker 1: whole thing, part of the thing I think with with
Speaker 1: like dismantling the binary and like the non binary of
Speaker 1: this general of their generation, which is just that like, guys,
Speaker 1: guess what, none of this fucking matters, Like you're actually
Speaker 1: focused on all the wrong ship like the way that
Speaker 1: you smell on things that you buy to like embellish
Speaker 1: this thing, this shell that you exist inside of. And
Speaker 1: by the way, this shell that you exist inside of
Speaker 1: like doesn't matter either, Like let's move on. There are
Speaker 1: other things that we need to like worry about. Now.
Speaker 1: That's not to say that like there are not kids
Speaker 1: of their generation that I see or just like doing
Speaker 1: TikTok's where they're like trying to look hot and they're
Speaker 1: like vaping. I I don't know, but I do think
Speaker 1: that there is Like did you guys ever hear the
Speaker 1: term indigo children when you were young? They're just like
Speaker 1: their children that are like born with a higher consciousness.
Speaker 1: They're just like sort of like born in a different way.
Speaker 1: And like maybe I don't know. Sometimes I think about
Speaker 1: like the neurodivergent movement and like how that also really
Speaker 1: has a lot to do with the younger generation as well,
Speaker 1: and like how those neurodivergent kids are like maybe that
Speaker 1: is the fucking next evolution, right, and like they're sort
Speaker 1: of operating and existing on a different plane where they
Speaker 1: can like, you know, you think about Greta thorn Thornburgh.
Speaker 1: Why did I just say her name like that? I know,
Speaker 1: I know, but I said it like with an accent,
Speaker 1: Like that's not you know what I mean? You know what? Maybe,
Speaker 1: but my kids still get mad at me when I
Speaker 1: say Hawaii. So let's be real, Well, well they're just
Speaker 1: my mom. Yeah, my mom lived in Hawaii. Kind it
Speaker 1: is Hawaii, but my mother lived in Hawaii, uh, like
Speaker 1: after she and my dad got married because he was
Speaker 1: in the Navy and he was stationed there. And so
Speaker 1: I always grew up saying Hawaii because my mother, like
Speaker 1: she just had a very theatrical way of it was
Speaker 1: the text on the page anyway, So I've always said
Speaker 1: it that way. But then at some point Bernie was like,
Speaker 1: why do you say Hawaii like that? Like you're not
Speaker 1: from Hawaii, Mom, You're not supposed to say it like that.
Speaker 1: I was like, well, it is how you're supposed to
Speaker 1: say it. That's very cute that they that that that
Speaker 1: Bertie's you know, kind of grilling you. He calls me
Speaker 1: out on everything please, But it's just like it's like
Speaker 1: it's like an exchange didn't coming back saying like barth alone,
Speaker 1: It's like, fine, it's what I let that Hopkins. Wow,
Speaker 1: to have to have a child that you are like
Speaker 1: intellectually not sure if you're on their level, it's that
Speaker 1: didn't happened to me. And you know what, Matt Rodgers,
Speaker 1: it's exhausting. Yeah. Like when I was in my late
Speaker 1: my dad always told me I know everything and I
Speaker 1: have like a long island dad, like I have a
Speaker 1: long Island sports dad. And he would tell me. One time,
Speaker 1: I was like, I wonder who I should ask this question?
Speaker 1: Like I said out loud, like I have a question.
Speaker 1: I wonder who I should ask When I was little,
Speaker 1: and my dad turned to me and he said, you
Speaker 1: always ask me every question. I know everything, And I
Speaker 1: remember being like, okay, I'm gonna internalize that. So there
Speaker 1: was like a couple of decades where I was like,
Speaker 1: my dad knows everything. My dad knows everything. If he
Speaker 1: says something, it's right, and that like confused me because
Speaker 1: he is, as I found out as an adult, a
Speaker 1: human being who is not always right. But that's a
Speaker 1: very that's a very baby boomer parent way of doing things,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like, it's so it's it's
Speaker 1: it's kind of fascinating that things have swung so far
Speaker 1: to the other side because it's like, um, now it's
Speaker 1: just all about communication and sharing perspective because at that
Speaker 1: time when I was the millennials parents. But by the way,
Speaker 1: let's just let's just say the millennials parents, they did
Speaker 1: not They did the opposite where they were like helicoptering
Speaker 1: and like doing everything for them. But are you a millennial?
Speaker 1: I mean they're we're all, we're a millennial. I think
Speaker 1: you were my age me. I'm no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I wasn't horrid, but at all, I'm I'm a thirty
Speaker 1: one year old man. Wait what yeah? Did you think
Speaker 1: I was? That's so funny to me. No, I thought
Speaker 1: I'd googled you. It's a different different mad rogers googled
Speaker 1: you earlier today and I was like, you're you're the
Speaker 1: same age as me. And then today I was just like,
Speaker 1: looks fucking amazing. I was like so happy for so
Speaker 1: now this makes way more Now, it makes way more
Speaker 1: sense what had happened. I think you stumbled upon the
Speaker 1: American Idol contestant Matt Rodgers. Okay, yeah, oh, and you
Speaker 1: know that ruined my life when I was that age,
Speaker 1: and I was like, because all I wanted wanted to
Speaker 1: do when I was twelve American Idol. And then when
Speaker 1: I saw that Matt Rogers, the American and a contestant
Speaker 1: has already already taken that niche, I was like, well,
Speaker 1: fuck now I can never be on American Idol or else.
Speaker 1: The storyline is going to be you have our secondary
Speaker 1: Rogers old, yeah, I got you now. Um, this is
Speaker 1: definitely not who I googled earlier. And it's completely fun
Speaker 1: because you know what, again, it's the fault of my
Speaker 1: father for Namy Matt Rogers. We're dragging Rich Rogers today
Speaker 1: because you know what, Rich, you should have done better.
Speaker 1: Why wasn't something? No, he's the best. Well, it's funny
Speaker 1: because I think I think over time he realized he
Speaker 1: didn't know everything. But I definitely think at the time
Speaker 1: when he told me that he thought he knew everything.
Speaker 1: It's so funny. The shock that's enveloping you as you've
Speaker 1: realized I'm not that one person. I was like, you
Speaker 1: were born in seventy eight year a year older than me.
Speaker 1: And then I'm like, this makes so much more sense.
Speaker 1: I'm almost like I'm embarrassed by myself in this moment,
Speaker 1: Like I can't tell you, but you don't have to google.
Speaker 1: This is how I knew. I knew that she didn't
Speaker 1: know who I was. At the Emmy's Bowen. You were
Speaker 1: like trying to gas me. You were like and she
Speaker 1: said she saw I'm like that when you were said,
Speaker 1: she said, I saw you with Matt. Yeah I did,
Speaker 1: Yeah I did, Matt. I did. Hey, Matt, can you
Speaker 1: just you know what, I'm gonna ask you to hold
Speaker 1: multiple things being true at one. Okay, yes, yes, number one.
Speaker 1: Here's the thing that I need you to hold, like
Speaker 1: I'm also a professional bitch, and like I had to
Speaker 1: google like a Wikipedia tonight when I was coming when
Speaker 1: I was like coming on the show literally minutes ago,
Speaker 1: I mean no, right before I pressed like joined the
Speaker 1: right before I just was like just a real quick refresh,
Speaker 1: just a real quick and I just literally saw seventy
Speaker 1: eight and I was like okay, seventy, I got that's funny.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize that wild. This is why I needed
Speaker 1: This is why I finally need a Wikipedia, because I
Speaker 1: have enough things now where I could get my own.
Speaker 1: Because people are confused that basically just googled you, and
Speaker 1: the SEO of the search and the search engine optimization
Speaker 1: is tipping in your favor now because now your name
Speaker 1: is coming your Matt Rodgers is coming up, your entry
Speaker 1: is coming up more. One of these days, your IMDb
Speaker 1: came up first. Well, we love that, but I hate IMDb.
Speaker 1: And also I was like, I know his IMDb. I
Speaker 1: don't need that. I want Wikipeda. I want to know
Speaker 1: where he's from. Rolled down and pitch Pigeon Forge I hit,
Speaker 1: and I hit the Rancho Cucamanda, and I was like,
Speaker 1: also wilds like a wild Okay, I swear that this
Speaker 1: is oh my god, wait and now I see this
Speaker 1: Matt Rogers is and this is definitely not you. It's
Speaker 1: actually so funny how few things we have in common,
Speaker 1: except potentially him being on American Idol and me at
Speaker 1: a young age wanting to be that's sort of and
Speaker 1: you know what else, there's a candidate for office name
Speaker 1: Matt Rogers and he his his Twitter handle is at
Speaker 1: Polito Dope and like he constantly gets like all the traffic.
Speaker 1: I'm just named something that approximately a hundred thousand other
Speaker 1: people are named, and that's just a burden I carry.
Speaker 1: I'm not a busy Phillips, That's true. Do you ever
Speaker 1: think about changing it? I did think about changing it.
Speaker 1: I almost changed it. And this is gonna God, the
Speaker 1: readers are going to drag me for this one. I
Speaker 1: almost changed it to Mac Rogers and they see Rogers. Wow,
Speaker 1: I've never told yeah, because I thought, like, I'll still
Speaker 1: be able to I was like be able to respond
Speaker 1: to it, like because I didn't want to create like
Speaker 1: a big name when I was already like a right,
Speaker 1: you're right, this is actually I just I wanted to
Speaker 1: be able to respond to it. Like if people were
Speaker 1: like this hard am in a hardy am in a
Speaker 1: hard a like Mac, I could still do that. But
Speaker 1: then I was like, I can't possibly be named Mac,
Speaker 1: like there's not a goddamn wife. And so I continue
Speaker 1: to live my life as Matt Rogers, and I always
Speaker 1: sort of stick to the thing of like it's okay
Speaker 1: if a million people are named this because one day
Speaker 1: they will be able to distinguish me. One day they
Speaker 1: will and um and I can and I do accept
Speaker 1: for my failing earlier this evening, when I just like Lakely,
Speaker 1: was scrolling but also there I wasn't in college. There
Speaker 1: was this kid whose name was Matt, and like, junior year,
Speaker 1: not freshman year, junior year, decided to go by Kevin,
Speaker 1: decided to That's what I'm saying. He went to Matt
Speaker 1: to Kevin, and then we were all so fucking confused,
Speaker 1: and when you would reference him, you would just be
Speaker 1: you know, Kevin, Matt, Matt, Kevin. It's like going from
Speaker 1: Ryan to Chris. It's like, okay, cool, wild, Well anyway,
Speaker 1: that's insane. We okay, but wait, we have to ask
Speaker 1: the question. We are we are? We are sort of
Speaker 1: flying through this episode at a joyous and sort of
Speaker 1: raucous pace, but we have to know, well, this is
Speaker 1: a love fast and you'll come back. But Busy, what
Speaker 1: was the culture that made you say culture was for you? Bowen?
Speaker 1: Do you want to sort of elaborate on the question.
Speaker 1: You don't have to, I know, I listened to the podcast. Okay, alright, Busy,
Speaker 1: the culture that made you say culture is for you.
Speaker 1: People mag People. My mother was a subscriber since the
Speaker 1: eight like early eighties, guys. I was one in seventy nine,
Speaker 1: and I would devour every issue and I just I mean,
Speaker 1: People mag to me was everything. I mean, that was
Speaker 1: celet found out what was going on, everything everything. I
Speaker 1: earlier tonight was actually thinking about this question, and I
Speaker 1: was like, was it bos Lerman's Romeo and Juliet was it? Sure?
Speaker 1: It could have been, could have been, But if I'm
Speaker 1: being honest, it was People mag. It was Ryan White
Speaker 1: on the cover. It was like, fucking I can't cover No.
Speaker 1: I read every fucking People Magazine. My my mom may
Speaker 1: still have a subscription. I don't know. I know that
Speaker 1: I subscribe personally to People mag online. Still still supports
Speaker 1: but star tracks Revolutionary. Yeah, so wait, favorite issues? I
Speaker 1: mean was the sexiest men Alive Issues sort of a
Speaker 1: big moment, People's most Beautiful? Like what what were favorite events?
Speaker 1: I mean I did love, I did love the most Beautiful.
Speaker 1: I never, like was super down with the sexiest because
Speaker 1: it's like not my vibe. Like I'm never on board
Speaker 1: with like a Hugh Jackman person. Yeah, I don't usually agree. Like,
Speaker 1: remember a few years ago, who do they pick you?
Speaker 1: When they picked Blake Shelton, I was like what people
Speaker 1: people were like, what's this for? And also like I'm
Speaker 1: not saying he should have been who they picked, but
Speaker 1: like he sits next to Adam Levin every week, you're
Speaker 1: going to say that's the sexiest man alive. Like I
Speaker 1: see someone more attractive that he sits next to Matt.
Speaker 1: You like Adam because he like favors you more. What
Speaker 1: why are you saying you're like more of an Adam
Speaker 1: Levine type. Sure, yeah, some people are. Some people's types
Speaker 1: of Blake Shelton will give them that. I mean, you
Speaker 1: know I did. I did work with someone who said, no,
Speaker 1: not Gwyneth. What's her name is a Gwyneth? I think
Speaker 1: she's Gwen. I worked with someone on Hotdog who was
Speaker 1: a producer on the Voice, and I asked one time,
Speaker 1: I was like, what's the you And she said to me,
Speaker 1: you know what in person? You get it? You wait
Speaker 1: full confession. So I actually I have known I have
Speaker 1: known Adam Living for a really long time and and
Speaker 1: the first season of the Voice, I don't remember why
Speaker 1: or what. I don't even remember what was happening. We
Speaker 1: went over to Adam's house at the time. He was like, hey, guys,
Speaker 1: come over, we're having this like some people over to
Speaker 1: watch the finale um And so we went and Blake
Speaker 1: was there and he was sitting on his table in
Speaker 1: the backyard and he and I were chatting, and I
Speaker 1: did fucking get it. I fully in person, you get it.
Speaker 1: So people don't just ends like there's got to be
Speaker 1: that yeah, very sparkly, very magnetic and like real funny
Speaker 1: and real real cute and real like. And the the
Speaker 1: thing is is, like, I mean, I don't know if
Speaker 1: he's a narcissist, but he had the thing that people
Speaker 1: that I have known who are narcissists have where when
Speaker 1: they look at you, you feel as though the entire
Speaker 1: world falls away, honey, honey. So it's a it's an
Speaker 1: external thing. It's an externalizing when when a narcissist turns
Speaker 1: their focus on you for however long it is, it's
Speaker 1: almost as if like in a cartoons, Yes, the entire
Speaker 1: rest of the world falls away, and it's like all
Speaker 1: like sparkles and you're just like locked into this moment
Speaker 1: because they're so like their gaze on you shining their light,
Speaker 1: which is why when it is like being in ak hole.
Speaker 1: You guys, I was a teenager in the nineties. I
Speaker 1: went to so many raves her so, which is why
Speaker 1: when a narcissist then takes their light away, it is
Speaker 1: freezing cold. It is just killed me. You just like
Speaker 1: logged in the reason why I haven't been able to
Speaker 1: get over this guy, Matt. There's this guy that is
Speaker 1: ruining my life because of his influence on Bowen, and
Speaker 1: I just keep trying to and that's what's what it is.
Speaker 1: And and Blake, and this is the Blake Shelton. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I just I just know I felt that
Speaker 1: a little bit with Blake. I don't know, this is
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I don't know. I cannot I can't
Speaker 1: say that he is that confirmed. I have had I
Speaker 1: have had experiences and relationships, both romantic and non romantic,
Speaker 1: with narcissists, and I know that feeling. And I remember
Speaker 1: meeting Mr Shelton in that backyard for ten fucking minutes
Speaker 1: and being like, it's the feeling. Yeah, it's the feeling.
Speaker 1: Oh no, it's so cold when he looks away. This
Speaker 1: is interesting, Okay. I have two things older than you.
Speaker 1: I have so many things. You know, what do you mean?
Speaker 1: This is? This is perfect? Okay? Well I knew was
Speaker 1: that the way you said when you said Ryan White issue,
Speaker 1: I was right there with you? Maybe I was, and
Speaker 1: I just did forgot. The first thing I want to
Speaker 1: talk about is like people was kind of the only
Speaker 1: game in town besides entertainment tonight. But like it didn't
Speaker 1: Maybe no, but not when I was not when I
Speaker 1: was not when I was coming up late nineties or
Speaker 1: mid nineties, right, I don't have the time quite right,
Speaker 1: But people, people was it? People was classy. Also there
Speaker 1: was always like there was always like also you know
Speaker 1: what um like Long Island? Lolita was like the guy
Speaker 1: who did nose job, the guy who did my nose job.
Speaker 1: Did the woman who mar the guy who did my
Speaker 1: nose and busy. I want to say, not that this matters,
Speaker 1: but I medically needed to get it done. So I've
Speaker 1: got a medically medically necessary nose job. Non elective guy,
Speaker 1: non elective. The guy who did my surgery put Mary
Speaker 1: Joe's face back together, okay, and did a great job.
Speaker 1: You know what, look for everyone, for everyone. That's a
Speaker 1: beautiful nose. Thank you so much. But I had to.
Speaker 1: I had to. I had to. I had to jump
Speaker 1: in there. No, that was like that was like a
Speaker 1: great cover. That was a great People cover. I mean
Speaker 1: all of them, liszt Liz Taylor, like just sucking. Every
Speaker 1: single one was gay people. Yep, I'm gay with people.
Speaker 1: Time for entertainment. Time, it was time. It was time
Speaker 1: a time, it was time. Was like this like this
Speaker 1: right with the hands out yeah, shrug emoji. No, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm cruel just like wait and then and then I've
Speaker 1: never been nice to me. But okay, I have a question.
Speaker 1: I have a question about people, Busy. Was it bizarre
Speaker 1: when you happened upon yourself and a People magazine? Know
Speaker 1: what was to change your relationship? Okay, go no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: about one. I was thrilled. It was the thrill of
Speaker 1: my fucking life when I made it finally into a
Speaker 1: People mag Um. I was devastated, devastated when my book
Speaker 1: came out. Um, I read a book, yeah, yep. And
Speaker 1: when my book came out, I was devastated that the
Speaker 1: only publication that was so reductive. In their five bombshells
Speaker 1: from Busy Phillips new memoir with People mag so devastated
Speaker 1: that I wrote a letter to Jess Cagel was Yeah, Jess,
Speaker 1: I was so fucking hurt. I was like, guys, of
Speaker 1: all the public I have literally read your mag since
Speaker 1: I was eight years old. That's not hyperbolic, that is
Speaker 1: a legitimate fact. I have like like every plane crash
Speaker 1: on the cover, every like child murdered, every fucking celebrity wedding,
Speaker 1: non story. You guys have no idea. I've been scriber
Speaker 1: and a susporter, literal reader, literal reader since I was
Speaker 1: a child, and of all the publication, of all the
Speaker 1: fucking publications to do the thing that I so was
Speaker 1: so terrified would happen when I wrote a memoir. It
Speaker 1: was people and god damn it, how dare you? Like,
Speaker 1: I was so fucking mad, just tab the tab the
Speaker 1: stuff that was like more like Franco pushed her to
Speaker 1: the ground and then like literally like in bold letters,
Speaker 1: like she had an abortion at fifteen. Like I was
Speaker 1: just like, how are you fucking doing this? This is
Speaker 1: you guys, are legit. I would expect I would expect
Speaker 1: this from US Weekly. I never expect I never saw
Speaker 1: it coming from Is that what you said in the
Speaker 1: letter expect I was bad when US Weekly kind of
Speaker 1: kind of stomped to the forefront like they were like
Speaker 1: the the the one of record there for like a
Speaker 1: couple of years, and they really made a hard left
Speaker 1: into tabloid. I was so disappointed because it really did
Speaker 1: become like one of those like what is the what
Speaker 1: a Frank asked me was like is Tom Cruise dead?
Speaker 1: It really genuinely became like one of those people that
Speaker 1: was like Jennef Radisson, three tits and divorced again. It's
Speaker 1: just like what are you talking about it? But it
Speaker 1: became like that, and I was so mad because I
Speaker 1: loved fashion Police. It was it was my fashion Police,
Speaker 1: some of my first exposure to American comedy because we
Speaker 1: just moved from Canada. Yeah, we had a subscription for
Speaker 1: US to Weekly from the from the previous and then
Speaker 1: we would just flipped to like Joan Rivers talking about
Speaker 1: like you know what what you know Janet Jackson wore
Speaker 1: or whatever the hell? Like literally that whenever anyone was
Speaker 1: wearing like a feather ensemble, there was, without fail, there
Speaker 1: was a joke that was like how many muppets did
Speaker 1: you have to kill to make this? My general ask
Speaker 1: would think that was so funny that make a garment.
Speaker 1: I thought that was the funniest ship ever. And I
Speaker 1: would roll. I was. I was in Fashion Police a
Speaker 1: couple of times. No featured deserve tis probably Yeah, I'm sure,
Speaker 1: look at me. I love a bold print. You know
Speaker 1: what I mean? Right now, print you take a big swing.
Speaker 1: But Joan was amazing and she was nice. And I
Speaker 1: went on Fashion Police on E like when it was
Speaker 1: on yeah, oh yeah, years like, and I sat in
Speaker 1: Joan's lap and she was a delight And actually I
Speaker 1: just had this reading from a medium, um and my yeah,
Speaker 1: it's gonna be on my podcast later, like we recorded
Speaker 1: it for the podcast because Casey saint On she's my partner.
Speaker 1: She was my show We're aren busy tonight. You know,
Speaker 1: she wrote for Joan years. She wrote like jokes for
Speaker 1: her and would write write like like punch up things
Speaker 1: for her. Whatever. They were good friends. And Joan came
Speaker 1: through on the reading. She when is that one coming up?
Speaker 1: I don't know. We have to figure it out because
Speaker 1: because we did this, like she did this thing with
Speaker 1: the medium, which was fucking us. This medium was fucking
Speaker 1: wild before well, honey, like I said, I'm a real
Speaker 1: l a bitch. I've done everything, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: Like like it's like we've gone through the journey. I
Speaker 1: have so many crystals on and I'm like constantly calling
Speaker 1: in the spirits whatever. But um, this medium was unreal
Speaker 1: and had things that were like there's no it's not
Speaker 1: google able, like my The whole reason why we even,
Speaker 1: like how I even got in touch with her was
Speaker 1: that Shintira Jackson, who's a writer I don't know, so
Speaker 1: she and Tira who's having her reading with her, and
Speaker 1: my fucking grandma came through in the reading and was
Speaker 1: like and she and here this is like she and
Speaker 1: Tire and night like we text we you know. She
Speaker 1: we're not doing the podcast together anymore because she's like
Speaker 1: working on Big Mouth and she's just like I'm overwhelmed
Speaker 1: and I need to focus on this. I'm like, great,
Speaker 1: live your life. Um she really is. And she texted
Speaker 1: me out of nowhere. This is so random, But I
Speaker 1: was having a reading with a medium and this old
Speaker 1: lady came through a grandma with my grandma, and she
Speaker 1: said that her granddaughter was elizab Busy. Elizab Busy and
Speaker 1: she has a tattoo on her foot. Do you have
Speaker 1: a tattoo on your foot? And I was like, yes, bitch,
Speaker 1: I have a tattoo on my line. And here's the
Speaker 1: kicker Elizabeth is and here's the kicker. My grandma never
Speaker 1: called me busy. She only called me Lila Bett, which
Speaker 1: is weirdly like the new name of the Harry and
Speaker 1: Megan baby Lila, Bet, elizabeths and bet like. She refused
Speaker 1: to call me busy, but she would call me like
Speaker 1: these other weird nicknames. And so she fucking came through.
Speaker 1: So I was like, well, this is wild. I gotta
Speaker 1: talk to this lady. So she and Tira put me
Speaker 1: in touch with the medium and then we had this
Speaker 1: and I was like, can my producer Casey come and
Speaker 1: can we record it for my podcast? And then we
Speaker 1: did and it was wild and the medium was like
Speaker 1: doing here's the things. Well, Joan fully came through. Here's
Speaker 1: the thing that I'm trying, Like that is so hard
Speaker 1: to in part how it's not google herble. She was
Speaker 1: doing um body movements that my grandmother did, like like
Speaker 1: like really specific movements like that my grandma did too.
Speaker 1: Like my grandma would do these like little like damp
Speaker 1: step things that I've never fucking I mean, it's just
Speaker 1: like a weird thing that she would do when I
Speaker 1: was a little kid and she was my grandma. And
Speaker 1: this lady fully fucking did them on the zoom and
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm so sorry, what are you doing?
Speaker 1: Guys ready for this fucking bullshit. At two hours after
Speaker 1: we record this session with this lady, I'm downstairs. My
Speaker 1: younger one Cricket, comes downstairs. She's seven, she'll be eight
Speaker 1: in July, and she's like, Mom, you want to see
Speaker 1: the dance I just came up with and does the
Speaker 1: same fucking my grandma did that. This lady, this medium
Speaker 1: did on the zooms. I was like, I'm just way busy.
Speaker 1: I'm on Bang, I'm on Bang, and I just I
Speaker 1: just bing busy Phillips grandma dance and it's the first result.
Speaker 1: It's not the fu I was like, God, Matt crazy,
Speaker 1: That's how I know on you too, because I am
Speaker 1: the one that's like I fully buy into all of it.
Speaker 1: Like do you ever watch I say, well, you were
Speaker 1: not into astrology until we started talking about it, Okay,
Speaker 1: but do you ever have you ever been on away
Speaker 1: from the Mike he's like very recently. Okay, but have
Speaker 1: you ever been on or do you watch Tyler Hamring
Speaker 1: Hollywood Media? Okay, what I call tink. He wanted, he
Speaker 1: wanted to, he wanted me to be on his chef.
Speaker 1: You have to, I said. I said, no, I couldn't
Speaker 1: because Matt, because I've had because I've had a famous
Speaker 1: friend die, and I'm just like, I don't want the
Speaker 1: whole show to be like about Heath Ledgers, Like I
Speaker 1: just can't and I can't do that to Heath and
Speaker 1: I can't do that to my God. I can't do
Speaker 1: this mission. I can't do So that's why I've always said,
Speaker 1: now you must continue to say I will but in
Speaker 1: but in the privacy of your own medium home like
Speaker 1: go off. She had were so many people that showed
Speaker 1: up and it was fucking wild and she was incredible,
Speaker 1: but like it was a pretty crazy night for information. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to get let's get let's let's get her
Speaker 1: on the pud. You should get her too, and then
Speaker 1: she that's Tyler like whatever, Well we well we just
Speaker 1: copped this idea straight from your podcast. But I mean,
Speaker 1: my podcast is so much less successful than this one.
Speaker 1: I don't probably better than us for sure. I wait,
Speaker 1: didn't wait, I don't know how podcast. Okay, your guests
Speaker 1: are like Tina Fey, like Tina, it's just friends. It's
Speaker 1: just people that I know, like you know, the people,
Speaker 1: you know, the coolest people. Okay, the people thing when
Speaker 1: they were rejective about your book, I mean, because you
Speaker 1: would already known at that point that like entertainment media
Speaker 1: is like mostly hollow. It was my biggest fear though,
Speaker 1: in writing a memoir. It was my biggest fear because
Speaker 1: of course I was like, I'm gonna do it, and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna name names because fuck it when people don't
Speaker 1: and I am. And then part two is that I
Speaker 1: hate reading people's memoirs where they were like I don't
Speaker 1: know why I ended up like fucked in the head
Speaker 1: and then an actor. But here we are like I'm funny,
Speaker 1: Like it's like you're where's the chunk of the part
Speaker 1: where you like had the trauma, Like what's that? It's
Speaker 1: the only thing that's interesting to me. Our origin stories,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, and like they all build
Speaker 1: upon each other building blocks, right, So I wanted to
Speaker 1: do it in the way that was like the most
Speaker 1: truthful way I could do it. But my biggest fear
Speaker 1: was being reduced to like celebrity gossip um because I
Speaker 1: actually also you know, have a certain amount of um
Speaker 1: hubre us and I think I'm a better fucking writer
Speaker 1: than that, and like and I and I'm just like, well,
Speaker 1: I reject that because I'm actually smarter. You know. Then
Speaker 1: you're both just totally and to see to see a
Speaker 1: publication like people that you've loved your whole life was
Speaker 1: exactly and I was just like, fuck you, I'm not
Speaker 1: Tori spelling like blessed, like I love but like also
Speaker 1: like I wrote this book myself and I think it's
Speaker 1: really good and I like it. And I told a
Speaker 1: lot of deeply personal stories that were like very meaningful
Speaker 1: and also revealed a lot of actual tal like actual
Speaker 1: fucking trauma in my life and like for it to
Speaker 1: be to reduce to like she was raped at fifteen,
Speaker 1: she had an abortion, or at fourteen, she had abortion
Speaker 1: at fifteen, I was like, fuck you guys, Like that's
Speaker 1: all I am to you, Like, that's all I am
Speaker 1: is just like a lady that you can put a
Speaker 1: fucking sidebar on where you like list the most traumatic
Speaker 1: things that have happened to me in my life in
Speaker 1: like chronological order, like like in like a drop shadow exactly,
Speaker 1: you know what a drop shadow font was like honestly
Speaker 1: the worst part um wait speaking the celebrity gossip. And
Speaker 1: I don't mean to, I don't mean to like veer
Speaker 1: into this territory, but I am curious to hear your
Speaker 1: thoughts as someone who like has a knowledge around like
Speaker 1: entertainment media. But like now like now that now this
Speaker 1: market is fully in like dim wash stranglehold where like
Speaker 1: anyone can just make up anything about anyone's lives and
Speaker 1: like you're on it like enough times where people are
Speaker 1: like she's not with her a kid. It's like it's
Speaker 1: or whatever, it's I'm just making this up. But it's
Speaker 1: like but and then like for me, like the lighter
Speaker 1: version is like um always being tagged and things that
Speaker 1: are like Sabo and Young walking in like Madison Square
Speaker 1: Park and I'm like that wasn't me, honey, Like it's
Speaker 1: just like now this is like dangerously like very like
Speaker 1: running off a cliff where it's like, oh, like it's
Speaker 1: a crowdsourced lie is what I'm sor this is becoming
Speaker 1: I don't always like I mean, Gawker guys, Hawker, you
Speaker 1: guys were you guys were tweens. But back, okay, well
Speaker 1: let me tell you a story strap in um but
Speaker 1: years and years ago, there was a gawker stalker about
Speaker 1: me that said that I was like making out with
Speaker 1: a guy in a bar in Brooklyn. And here's the truth.
Speaker 1: I had just gotten married to Mark. I was in
Speaker 1: that bar in Brooklyn with Michelle. I wasn't making out
Speaker 1: with a guy at all. No, he wasn't there, he
Speaker 1: was in l A. But like, but it caused like
Speaker 1: a great amount of like personal fucking drama and stress
Speaker 1: in my life. And like of course also it was
Speaker 1: just sucking insane, Like I was in that bar, I
Speaker 1: was with Michelle. I wasn't making out with this fucking
Speaker 1: girls friend, Like what what the fuck it was? This was?
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean, this is fifteen fift like fourteen
Speaker 1: fucking years ago. Right. The point is that, like anyone's
Speaker 1: truth can become the truth in the Internet, and it
Speaker 1: is truly fucked. And part of the reason why I
Speaker 1: like loved social media in its beginning nascent stage, yeah,
Speaker 1: when it was exciting still and promising, was that it
Speaker 1: was like offered me an opportunity to have my own
Speaker 1: on my own home, and like I didn't feel that
Speaker 1: I was, um, you know, sort of like jailed by
Speaker 1: some sucking gawker stalker bit. She was like she was
Speaker 1: at this bar making out with this dude, when I
Speaker 1: was like, I was really at that bar. It was
Speaker 1: not making out what that fucking dude bitch. No, I
Speaker 1: don't because at the time, I really say it was
Speaker 1: drop off service. It was near the old mccaren pool,
Speaker 1: like it was in Brooklyn, because that's what Michelle's vibe.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I'm in the city, Matt, don't. Let's not
Speaker 1: fucking funk around. I get it, you know, I trust
Speaker 1: me drop off services. Okay, so I was giving you
Speaker 1: more credit. But anyway, like I just you know, it
Speaker 1: is really difficult. It's difficult that like people can sort
Speaker 1: of come up with a thing about you, and like
Speaker 1: they were saying that you and Mark were like divorced
Speaker 1: right now, just fucking crate no, no, no, like months ago,
Speaker 1: and I wanted to be like I wanted to like
Speaker 1: d n them direct to be like this is so,
Speaker 1: and then they debunked it quickly later with like someone
Speaker 1: else's submission. They were like, oh, she's definitely still married.
Speaker 1: Everyone like everyone like fallback, but it's like it's also
Speaker 1: like wild, like like randomly somebody on Instagram the other
Speaker 1: day I was like, are you still with Mark? Like
Speaker 1: I'm like, first of all, bitch, Like when am I
Speaker 1: answering this on your comments on my comments of my
Speaker 1: post of my kids? Like what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: What is happening? What is happening? Like it's a certain
Speaker 1: amount of like ship that we sign up for and
Speaker 1: then ship that we're just like, I don't think we
Speaker 1: signed up for this. I don't think any of us
Speaker 1: signed up for this because for dim Watt, for Jim
Speaker 1: Watt to have in their bio, none of what we
Speaker 1: say is actually factual, is like fucking stupid you Okay,
Speaker 1: it's an Instagram page and honestly, basically a lot of
Speaker 1: it is just like I saw so and so, like
Speaker 1: they saw me walking with a nice coffee on Franklin
Speaker 1: app and I can con firm it was me, Like
Speaker 1: what's the other one? That's like the other one? It's
Speaker 1: like a what's the other one that I have to be?
Speaker 1: Is it private? Is dim want private? They're all fucking private,
Speaker 1: but like fuck them for being private. That's the other thing,
Speaker 1: Like in public, if you have any balls, you motherfucker's know.
Speaker 1: Like there's another one that's like it's like chow Bella
Speaker 1: or wherever the funk it is, and it's and it's
Speaker 1: like it's like still like like Busy Phillips was that? Yeah,
Speaker 1: like all time picking up to go on on you
Speaker 1: know Vermont or what is a hill Hurst? I go
Speaker 1: all I heard Maru is a real scene. Now there's
Speaker 1: lines out the door for that coffee. Well during during
Speaker 1: reservation eraic COVID, it's like, you know, it's hard to
Speaker 1: get in anywhere, I guess. So before Okay, two thoughts.
Speaker 1: Number one, Torozzo, that's my first thought. Number two as
Speaker 1: heraza was everything I'm I'm happy to know. Number two,
Speaker 1: here's my other thought, Like it is fascinating to me,
Speaker 1: like people's fascination with blinds. Mm, well I get it,
Speaker 1: and does opper time We all don't get it. It's
Speaker 1: a fill in the blank and like and so like
Speaker 1: the brain is like the brain's favorite thing to do
Speaker 1: is like try to fill in missing information and then
Speaker 1: the conjecture and then assume things and that's what blind
Speaker 1: items do like. And it's so I'm sort of fascinated
Speaker 1: by the veneer cracking because I feel and I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna trace it back to growing up like a gay kid.
Speaker 1: I always wanted to be in the entertainment industry, and
Speaker 1: I always felt like what was prohibiting me from being
Speaker 1: in the entertainment industry are being a quote unquote star
Speaker 1: or being able to do what I knew I loved
Speaker 1: was the fact that I was gay. I thought that
Speaker 1: was unfair. So I always thought to myself, I know
Speaker 1: that I know that a lot of these guys are gay.
Speaker 1: I know that a lot of these people have certain
Speaker 1: things that are different about them, but no one is
Speaker 1: no one is reflecting that back to me, someone who
Speaker 1: looks up to them. Because I was also I read
Speaker 1: all the magazines too, and like I watched you know,
Speaker 1: Access Hollywood Entertainment tonight, like I wanted to be part
Speaker 1: of that world, and I felt like it was all
Speaker 1: these like very straight, white, attractive people, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I understand that this is like a world. This is
Speaker 1: like a world where all these things are true. And
Speaker 1: then as I got a little bit older, I was like,
Speaker 1: what the funk like and and so. I think that
Speaker 1: what fascinates me about the blind item culture of it all.
Speaker 1: And I get that it's cruel and speculative and weird,
Speaker 1: but I kind of am a little obsessed sometimes with
Speaker 1: the Bernard all down of it all. Like I love
Speaker 1: in the last five years, it kind of becomes like,
Speaker 1: you know, you know what, people are all out here
Speaker 1: saying their truth. People are out there saying their experiences,
Speaker 1: owning up to what makes them different, owning up to
Speaker 1: things they've done that we're wrong, saying things that have
Speaker 1: happened to them, because I actually think reflects back to
Speaker 1: people that look up to them a more realistic world.
Speaker 1: Not saying a defensive blind item culture. But when I
Speaker 1: see a blind item that is like so and so
Speaker 1: a list actor is actually gay and been with his
Speaker 1: partner for three years, part of me is like, well,
Speaker 1: who is it? Because I would like to know who
Speaker 1: it is? Because I not to be like not to
Speaker 1: make this connection. But representation does matter, and there's there
Speaker 1: was none, there was none. But I'm confused. Are you
Speaker 1: saying that it is encouraging to you when you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: some I'm not. I'm not calling it encouraging. I'm saying,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's recognizing the fact that these people are
Speaker 1: not just this like unattainable thing. Like there's a lot
Speaker 1: of and I'll just use sexuality as an example of this.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of people out there that are have
Speaker 1: a lot more in common with the general population than
Speaker 1: I think Hollywood would have everyone realized. So that's what
Speaker 1: I think the blind item culture attracts in people. I
Speaker 1: think it just makes them say, oh, people have skeletons
Speaker 1: in my closet like I do. They're not just this
Speaker 1: perfected ideal. That's what I'm saying. All of the like
Speaker 1: social media ship and like I hate uh, I hate
Speaker 1: like a performative realness like or like a performative vulnerability,
Speaker 1: right like that like bums me the funk out. Um.
Speaker 1: But I do think and I do think that the
Speaker 1: more we can like be honest and open and like,
Speaker 1: if you're in the public sphere, you can like share
Speaker 1: your experience and blah blah blah blah. Now having had
Speaker 1: the experience that I've had in the last only several
Speaker 1: months since my kid and I talked about their desires,
Speaker 1: like their desire for me to like share their sexuality
Speaker 1: and gender on like my podcast, on my platform with
Speaker 1: people who are like my fans. But then it's going
Speaker 1: to get extrapolated, and it's going to be put into
Speaker 1: the ether of like the fucking fucking world and spawn
Speaker 1: out there, Like, Matt, can I just tell you that
Speaker 1: I am a forty one I'm going to be forty
Speaker 1: two in two weeks, woman who has like fucking been
Speaker 1: through it, seeing it, learned it, accepted the privilege, learned
Speaker 1: it again, fucking here for it, like got it, feel
Speaker 1: great alright, best body early anyway, and like and when
Speaker 1: I tell you that some of the messages that I
Speaker 1: get on a daily basis make me want to fucking
Speaker 1: curl into a shell and die, like a about my child,
Speaker 1: about me like about that, I'm like, oh, that's why,
Speaker 1: that's why, that's why you want to keep the fence
Speaker 1: as high as it can go and as strong as
Speaker 1: it can be, and why the blinds can be so
Speaker 1: no matter what they are, no matter what they are.
Speaker 1: And I'm not just talking about like this is my
Speaker 1: fucking experience because of you know, my fucking experience whatever
Speaker 1: they are, Like you just that feeling of being attacked
Speaker 1: for just existing in the way you want to exist
Speaker 1: is hard. Yeah, I think it's just painful what what
Speaker 1: the interest is and not whether or not it should be.
Speaker 1: But I guess I think there's a separation between like,
Speaker 1: but the interest is starting to creep into into harm.
Speaker 1: It's also been the last five plus years of like
Speaker 1: our cultural shift in like, you know, having these people
Speaker 1: who have been empowered to think that like the way
Speaker 1: to get any point across is to be as loud
Speaker 1: and hateful and vengeful as possible and that they are
Speaker 1: like empowered by like a higher power even which is
Speaker 1: also we know, I mean for sure, well but whatever
Speaker 1: they believe. But it's fucking bonkers, right, And so I
Speaker 1: don't know, like it's it's really tricky for me because
Speaker 1: it doesn't seem like it's like harmless like or not
Speaker 1: even harmless like, or it's like relatable, like I want
Speaker 1: to know, like I want people to like be empowered
Speaker 1: to like be and live and like whatever, because yeah,
Speaker 1: because they're such fucking hatred and there's and there are
Speaker 1: such awful fucking people who use it as an opportunity.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know, No, I mean, like I
Speaker 1: I hate that I'm getting uh, cloying about my sexuality
Speaker 1: on you know, Pride mounth or whatever. But I'm like,
Speaker 1: I am constantly thinking about especially lately. I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: if people are like so upset and flared up at
Speaker 1: me showing up on TV and they think I am
Speaker 1: like the gayest person in the world, I promise I
Speaker 1: wish I was. I promise them I am not. But
Speaker 1: if you're like freaked out over me, then like that
Speaker 1: sucks for everyone else who's like living out some queerness
Speaker 1: that is like much more pronounced and externalized and like
Speaker 1: and just is like more let's just say, like obvious
Speaker 1: than me. And I'm like that bums me. I'm not
Speaker 1: saying like, oh, like what was me. I'm saying like
Speaker 1: this just sucks for everyone else. And I'm like, and
Speaker 1: I hate that I'm saying this about like assist me
Speaker 1: as a sisk amen, But I'm like, what if if
Speaker 1: I'm going through this, then like then we've got a
Speaker 1: long fucking way to go. And I don't think we've
Speaker 1: come as far as we as we think we have,
Speaker 1: because I mean, I will just be honest and I
Speaker 1: don't mean to bring the mood down, but like I
Speaker 1: have like absolutely like boarded into like suicidal thoughts. I like,
Speaker 1: I like, I like, I've run up to the line.
Speaker 1: The toe is like crossed into the others and to
Speaker 1: the other side, and like I don't want to deal
Speaker 1: with this. I don't want to deal with this. This
Speaker 1: is not worth it. This is not worth it it.
Speaker 1: I mean, I yes, and I like and I think,
Speaker 1: I mean, I think about this fucking month and I'm
Speaker 1: like I was talking to Bird about it, and I
Speaker 1: was like, do you wanna do the parade this month?
Speaker 1: Do you want to like go? And like this is
Speaker 1: the first time we drove past it last year and
Speaker 1: fucking lived, you know. I mean it was like still
Speaker 1: COVID lockdown. And also Bernie Haye crowds and hates being hot.
Speaker 1: These are two things that are just inaliable, I know.
Speaker 1: And I was like, baby, that's what it is. And
Speaker 1: Bertie was like, it's not for me, and I was
Speaker 1: probably not um but they were like maybe. But let
Speaker 1: me just say to you that I came home from
Speaker 1: work shooting girls five ever, like the night of the insurrection,
Speaker 1: and I had been working all day and at my
Speaker 1: lunch ower, one of the pas and I sat in
Speaker 1: a room in the house that we were shooting in
Speaker 1: and watched the fucking television, cried, and it was a
Speaker 1: hard fucking day. And I came home and I went
Speaker 1: up to my twelve year old child's room and my
Speaker 1: kids said, did you see what happened today? And I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, yeah, baby, I saw that is it
Speaker 1: is truly fucked. It is so wild. And you know,
Speaker 1: we are doing all the things that we can do,
Speaker 1: your dad and me and like other people that we know,
Speaker 1: and like, we're doing all the ship we can do
Speaker 1: to help prevent more ship like that in the future.
Speaker 1: And these people and whatever. And Bertie looked at me
Speaker 1: and said, they want me dead. They want me dead, mom,
Speaker 1: they want me dead. And what the fuck are you
Speaker 1: supposed to say to that, because the answer is you're right,
Speaker 1: they do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's that's a fucking and
Speaker 1: this is what this is why I'm sorry to make
Speaker 1: to bring this back to this point, but I'm like,
Speaker 1: this is why I could never It's hard. It's hard,
Speaker 1: and Bowen, I want to say to you in that moment,
Speaker 1: exhausted from working a twelve hour fucking day, exhausted from
Speaker 1: the state of the fucking union, exhausted from fighting my
Speaker 1: own fight for like fucking women's rights, which Bertie and
Speaker 1: I've talked about yesterday, and I need to say, are
Speaker 1: people's rights because lots of people need healthcare who have
Speaker 1: uterus is who aren't women. That is a fucking fact, Bertie,
Speaker 1: Thank you for that conversation. But like I was exhausted.
Speaker 1: And when Bertie said that to me on that night
Speaker 1: fucking January whatever, six, what was it, I don't know.
Speaker 1: It wasn't the six that was Oh, it was okay,
Speaker 1: there you go. When they said that to me, I
Speaker 1: was like, you're right, they do. They do, but you
Speaker 1: know what, we're not going to let them, like, we're
Speaker 1: not going to let them, and I'm not going to
Speaker 1: let them. No one's gonna fucking let them. You're right,
Speaker 1: but that's not I know, I know, I know. But
Speaker 1: they're old enough to know that if you had said
Speaker 1: that's not true, then they would have known that you
Speaker 1: were lying, yeah, and condescending to them, yeah, and patronizing
Speaker 1: and so so I think you said exactly what you
Speaker 1: had to quote unquotes say. I don't know, well, you
Speaker 1: never know, You're never gonna know, but I can tell
Speaker 1: you're a great fucking mom, and I'm fine, I'm fine,
Speaker 1: but all the time, and I'm like my own person.
Speaker 1: That's the thing too, Like you're like my dad was
Speaker 1: never wrong, and he was like well, and then I
Speaker 1: learned he was a person. I'm constantly like I am.
Speaker 1: You're right. You know, I allowed probably too much runway
Speaker 1: for them to be like both of my kids to
Speaker 1: be like you fucking suck, You're the worst because I'm like,
Speaker 1: I am a person, I'm doing I And then I
Speaker 1: also now I hate saying I'm doing my best because
Speaker 1: that's the name of my podcast, and so it does
Speaker 1: feel like a little bit cheesy to me when I
Speaker 1: say that, because I mean, we can't say I don't
Speaker 1: think honey anymore. That's why why don't I take that
Speaker 1: and you guys can take yeaheah, I'm doing but I
Speaker 1: was saying the medium idea. But yes, people take on
Speaker 1: doing that. I was the bone is like I'm on
Speaker 1: the phone with the medium already. Yeah. The good news
Speaker 1: is it's not over because we have to transition to
Speaker 1: our speaking of segments. I don't think so, honey. So basically,
Speaker 1: you know, this is the one minute segment where we
Speaker 1: take the time to sort of rail against something in
Speaker 1: pop culture, culture, etcetera at all that is sort of
Speaker 1: getting to us so much so that we have to
Speaker 1: just spend a minute sort of ranting about it. Um,
Speaker 1: I do have one, and traditionally I do go first
Speaker 1: bow should I yeah? Yes, yes, yes, I want Can
Speaker 1: I say you have to come back? Because I have
Speaker 1: some more questions for first of all, like it's a
Speaker 1: joy talking to you, but I questions like when I
Speaker 1: found out your like you have a story credit on
Speaker 1: Blades of Gloria, I need to know about that, like
Speaker 1: you Yeah, but I want you to come back to
Speaker 1: so folks, how about that? All right? So I do
Speaker 1: have one. Okay, this is this is Matt Rodgers. I
Speaker 1: don't think so, honey. As time starts now, I don't
Speaker 1: think so honey. The concept of a freak number, so
Speaker 1: basically some people will ask each other what's your freak number?
Speaker 1: And now what they're saying is like in terms of
Speaker 1: a freak number, like how much or a freak are
Speaker 1: you one through ten? In bed? This is the question
Speaker 1: that one Andy Cohen asked all the time. And I
Speaker 1: was watching Watch What Happens Live last night when he
Speaker 1: had Uzo Aduba and the fucking hot John Benjamin Hickey
Speaker 1: on his show Break My Arm. So basically he asked
Speaker 1: John Benjamin Hicky, what's your freak number? And he said
Speaker 1: about a six, and he said, no, you're a ten. Now.
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey, saying your freak number is
Speaker 1: a ten, because if I'm in a one through ten
Speaker 1: and ten is the max, ten means like some fifty
Speaker 1: shades of gray stuff or like some you know, like
Speaker 1: blood stuff. Ten if it's you're going as far as
Speaker 1: you can go, and then you say you're a ten,
Speaker 1: that means you're into some stuff. So I don't know.
Speaker 1: I feel like everyone's rubric is different, Like if you're
Speaker 1: gonna say ten, then be willing to back that up.
Speaker 1: And I know you can't say. I guess I'm beat
Speaker 1: seven seven point five, maybe eight if you catch me
Speaker 1: on a good day. But I don't think so, honey,
Speaker 1: this number and that's one minute now. Andy rejected the
Speaker 1: number six and said and and conferred upon him that
Speaker 1: he was at ten. That's not so. I guess. He's
Speaker 1: been friends with with Mr Hickey for some time and
Speaker 1: he had Uzzo and do but do a sort of
Speaker 1: thing where he was like, Uzzo, you asked me a
Speaker 1: question about John, and I'm gonna answer, and if if
Speaker 1: I get it wrong, John can spray me in the
Speaker 1: face with water. So Uzzo asked, what is John's freak number?
Speaker 1: And Andy said ted, and John sprayed him right in
Speaker 1: the face and said what he said, what why are
Speaker 1: you doing that? In his Andy Cohne way, And then
Speaker 1: so John goes, I'm a six, and he was like,
Speaker 1: You're not a six, You're a tat man. And I
Speaker 1: was kind of just like, this is interesting because how
Speaker 1: could he possibly be a ten? Ted is like scary
Speaker 1: for a freak number. Wow, wow, wow wow. Maybe Andy Cohen,
Speaker 1: just like himself, has a high freak number and just Jex,
Speaker 1: this is what I'm gonna say that. It was just
Speaker 1: like there's a lot of projection happening in that moment. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I will say, Andy Eno, I think that. I think
Speaker 1: he was just sitting there and getting all excited and
Speaker 1: he was looking at John Benjamin Hickey, his friend who's hot,
Speaker 1: and he said he's a high freak number because let
Speaker 1: me tell you something, that man, he's so hot and
Speaker 1: he's such a good actor. Busy are you watching in treatment.
Speaker 1: I haven't watched it yet. The new one, Now you're
Speaker 1: gonna love it. You're gonna love it. You're gonna love
Speaker 1: it anyway. And the freak number thing I've always been hot.
Speaker 1: He's he's got he's a silver Fox, he's got away
Speaker 1: and an Emmy and an Emmy in his hand. We
Speaker 1: love that for them. I don't think come September. Um, alright,
Speaker 1: so listen, Yang, I turned to you as when Houston
Speaker 1: once said, for your I don't think so, honey. Are
Speaker 1: you ready? I'm ready? Okay, Well, this in that case
Speaker 1: is Boen Yang's. I don't think so, honey. His time
Speaker 1: starts now. I don't think so, honey. It taking a
Speaker 1: million weeks for Levitating Featuring the Baby to go number one.
Speaker 1: It's been eighty four years and it is a perfect
Speaker 1: pop song. It's not taken this long for it to
Speaker 1: hit number one, and you number one, and today it
Speaker 1: went to number onelation. Congratulations to the team. She posted
Speaker 1: a lovely note today on Maine on Grid, saying, oh
Speaker 1: my god, we did it. You you had this memory
Speaker 1: single day that the chart placement of Levitating feature of
Speaker 1: Featuring the Baby, and I just feel like this is
Speaker 1: a cruel and unusual punishment to put this girl in
Speaker 1: music and chart perfect story in limbo for this whole time,
Speaker 1: and she has to fucking dance and jump through hoops literally.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm sure she did a version where she jumped
Speaker 1: through for her to make sure this song hit number one.
Speaker 1: And now she can finally rest easy and everyone should
Speaker 1: stream the news. Ale is got me love again? Goddamn,
Speaker 1: you got me love again. I mean she's in the
Speaker 1: pop group Girls five. Happened to hear it, by the way, Wait,
Speaker 1: can I say that not we didn't talk enough about
Speaker 1: Girls five ever, but we didn't. It's sort of it's
Speaker 1: sort of like it sclos without saying that we love
Speaker 1: and we really do. But the last episode, I was
Speaker 1: crying at the end of that song. And and then
Speaker 1: I loved when you guys all went up with Sarah
Speaker 1: and did it live. It was so fun. Tomorrow which
Speaker 1: this isn't live but tomorrow, but you guys, tomorrow we're
Speaker 1: on the Today Show and we do it chatting about
Speaker 1: the renewal. No we sang no, but you're going on
Speaker 1: we chat you Tina. Tina is on chatting and then
Speaker 1: they cut, and then they like cut to us and
Speaker 1: we sang, um, four stars, four stars, which is a bob,
Speaker 1: such a good what I think they're all kind of bangers,
Speaker 1: famous five almost every day, so good and dream girlfriend
Speaker 1: and Girlfriends is my favorite. And you know, my favorite
Speaker 1: line is we got the kind of booth control the
Speaker 1: girls never want to wake up from my favorite dream girlfriend.
Speaker 1: It's so fu good. My favorite lyric from Dream Girlfriends
Speaker 1: is um because we're the kind of girls who wear
Speaker 1: cowboy hats to a bar. I mean, by the way,
Speaker 1: it's like everything rings true. That's amazing about the lyrics
Speaker 1: is that they were like absurd and yet so truthful.
Speaker 1: They well observed, absurd but observed. Wait, absurd but observed
Speaker 1: is like on a T shirt. Come on it, um wait?
Speaker 1: But wait, what I wanted to say before we do business,
Speaker 1: I don't thinks funny is wait, what is the song
Speaker 1: about the um kid in the city? I love I
Speaker 1: love it. It's so funny to me, Every every single
Speaker 1: song hits for me. You're right, but but I mean,
Speaker 1: four Stars is just it's just a hit song. It's
Speaker 1: just it's Sarah. It's really sweet. It's really sweet, and
Speaker 1: it's like got so much warmth and heart and like,
Speaker 1: how lucky I fucking am in this like hail Mary,
Speaker 1: like a eleventh hour fucking whatever. Guys, you guys, you guys.
Speaker 1: I'm essentially you guys. I'm essentially Jean Smart. Like this
Speaker 1: is my farewell tour, you know what I mean. Let's
Speaker 1: be to be forty two. My ship is sailed. You
Speaker 1: and you and Michelle are going to have a big
Speaker 1: reunion project and like the world is gonna bust their
Speaker 1: damn and just wait, just wait, just wait. I have
Speaker 1: this movie that I'm going to direct. Whoa, I'm so
Speaker 1: excited about it. I can't Okay, but this, Michelle is
Speaker 1: going to be in it. Yeah, and it's gonna be
Speaker 1: so good. It's gonna be so good something I fucking stand.
Speaker 1: Michelle and I saw Cabaret opening night. I don't know
Speaker 1: how this happened same, but I was there. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: you were probably in the front. Me and Study were
Speaker 1: in the literal back row. I'm not kidding you. We
Speaker 1: don't know how we got tickets. We were walking through
Speaker 1: the like area where you get drinks, and Cynthia Nixon
Speaker 1: was talking to Braudley Cooper. Okay, and so we were.
Speaker 1: But I'm telling you Michelle killed. Oh my god, she
Speaker 1: fucking crushed, and she went back to the original text
Speaker 1: you go there, you go. And also that's what makes
Speaker 1: rewatch my week with Maryland now because when because there's
Speaker 1: a there's a line that that she goes, and I
Speaker 1: think it's iconic and I always will do it to
Speaker 1: my friends, even my gayest friends. I'll do this line too,
Speaker 1: and they'll be like, what's that from? I go shall
Speaker 1: I be her? And I go who? And then you
Speaker 1: say Maryland? It is iconic When she turns to Eddie
Speaker 1: rate Man and says, shall I be her? Because there's
Speaker 1: pressed outside? I think I said, that's like Louis and
Speaker 1: he didn't know what I was talking about something. They
Speaker 1: just you telling me that right now, like in this moment,
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit like we all should have Shall
Speaker 1: I be her? Shall I be her? Every every day
Speaker 1: before I work out and we'll go out into Franklin
Speaker 1: Avenue with a nice coffee, I say, shall I be he? Shell?
Speaker 1: Because going to cover it? And also like go funk yourselves.
Speaker 1: I can't even pre that. I don't think so, honey,
Speaker 1: speaking of negative thoughts, it's time, busy, you're not ready
Speaker 1: for my eye. I don't think so, honey. Yes, oh okay,
Speaker 1: well we'll see about that. Yang all right, but when
Speaker 1: are you going a time? Or should I all? Timer? Yes?
Speaker 1: This is busy, This is busy Phillips. I don't think so, honey.
Speaker 1: Heard time starts this so specific. I don't think so honey,
Speaker 1: New York Produce. What are you doing? Who do you
Speaker 1: think you are? Why are you an avocado? And you're rotten?
Speaker 1: Two seconds after I get you home from Twitter Joe's
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. I don't think so honey,
Speaker 1: this produce. What are we doing here? It all tastes
Speaker 1: like shit. It's terrible, No wonder people are in such
Speaker 1: a fucking bad mood for half of the fucking year.
Speaker 1: You can't get a goddamn citrus fruit to save your life.
Speaker 1: Where's the fucking hair? Goes from literally hardest fuck dead
Speaker 1: woman to half seconds. My children, who grew up eating
Speaker 1: every sort of delicious bounty of fucking Hollywood farmers market
Speaker 1: fair that you could find, have now declared that they
Speaker 1: are not in for the produce. And I'm like, New York,
Speaker 1: get it the fuck together. That's all I have to say.
Speaker 1: She don't think so, honey, someone misses the Sunday farmers
Speaker 1: markets of l A. I can see it in your eyes.
Speaker 1: New York is a disaster. But what can you do
Speaker 1: about There's there's no where we know what? You know
Speaker 1: what we get instead? And this is a This is
Speaker 1: a girl who is like I am. I am in
Speaker 1: the wool, died in the whatever the funk? That expression
Speaker 1: is sure. I'm l A through and through. I am
Speaker 1: West Coast fucking raised and educated for two years before
Speaker 1: I got my first TV show and just lived like
Speaker 1: just that is where my home is. But here's what
Speaker 1: we get in New York. Instead of the good produce, nutritious,
Speaker 1: delicious produce, we get culture. Yeah. And you know what else?
Speaker 1: You know what the children get? They get um, they
Speaker 1: get a world that is bigger than one industry and
Speaker 1: one idea of what something? Uh yeah? And for that,
Speaker 1: I say, I think we're going to live in New
Speaker 1: York until my children are old enough to go to college.
Speaker 1: Do you think, God, yeah, yeah, yeah, I can't. I can't.
Speaker 1: I hide. I'm not gonna say I hate it here,
Speaker 1: it's not I can't. The lack of Arajuan is stifling
Speaker 1: my soul. Howevs. Sorry, sorry, we just we just find
Speaker 1: our titles of a as. Yeah, the lack of arionon
Speaker 1: the lack of arion is stifling my soul, how evs.
Speaker 1: The growth that I've seen in both of my children
Speaker 1: since September has been worth the price of admission. And
Speaker 1: I would say that being in any city that is
Speaker 1: not um, a city that is focused on one industry
Speaker 1: and one way of being, is beneficial for a developing mind,
Speaker 1: and especially when you have kids that are like never
Speaker 1: divergent and different in all kinds of ways and like
Speaker 1: just and and also just all children like maybe like
Speaker 1: like l A is like amazing for babies, Like it's
Speaker 1: like the easiest best best place to have babies because
Speaker 1: there's space and pools and outdoors and nice weather the
Speaker 1: whole year round and like all this other stuff. But
Speaker 1: when they get to be a certain age and they
Speaker 1: when you're in like the most impressionable age, and you
Speaker 1: think that like only one thing is important and there's
Speaker 1: only one way to be and there's only one way
Speaker 1: to make a living and to live and to like
Speaker 1: exists in the world. I'm not saying Bertie is like
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, like god friends of like oh
Speaker 1: socio economic Wait, like let's be real, Like they're in
Speaker 1: fucking private school and they're still a child who's not
Speaker 1: fully enlightened yet but yet totally totally and like all
Speaker 1: of the things. But they're like their friends are like
Speaker 1: have all different kinds of interests and they're not those
Speaker 1: interests vary from being like famous on TikTok to be fat. No,
Speaker 1: I'm kidding, but every every child should be raised in
Speaker 1: a city where they don't know what Quimby is a
Speaker 1: hundred fucking percent. And by the way, like r I P,
Speaker 1: I think that that's next year, no one's gonna know
Speaker 1: what Quimby was. But like no, but like Bertie's friends
Speaker 1: like at this point now here, I think it's like
Speaker 1: mildly amusing what their mom does, Whereas in Los Angeles,
Speaker 1: legit Mark walked in on Bertie having a discussion, like
Speaker 1: a serious debate in fourth grade with a another kid
Speaker 1: from their school about whose parents had more Instagram followers. Unacceptable,
Speaker 1: It's unacceptable. Honestly, get the Atlas van lines and and
Speaker 1: so and so. Being in New York is worth all
Speaker 1: of the bruised apricots and flavorless hickam bruised apricots. Honey,
Speaker 1: you know you can't even get an apricot? What are
Speaker 1: you talking about where I didn't know. I'm not even
Speaker 1: kidding you, Bone, I will fuck you for an apricot.
Speaker 1: Like at this point, I'm like, what whose chick am
Speaker 1: I say? Apricot? Quick? I am so deprived of my
Speaker 1: fucking farmer's market fair. I sparagus today and I was like,
Speaker 1: this is amazing. It's just asparagus. I was like, I
Speaker 1: haven't tasted today anything like this in months. You guys,
Speaker 1: the produce here is yeah. But now I'm saying you
Speaker 1: might have to go to Brooklyn now because the Brooklyn
Speaker 1: does have good farmers markets. Don't be it, don't be
Speaker 1: in Manhattan snob now, listen, I'm not, I'm not. But
Speaker 1: here's the problem is that Mark's family is from like
Speaker 1: Sheephead's Bay, Brooklyn, and so he has like a deep
Speaker 1: sense memory association with Brooklyn that's like old people and
Speaker 1: like smelly apartments. And he can't Barbara's brook He can't.
Speaker 1: He can't cross the threshold we were looking for. I
Speaker 1: was like, let's buy a house in Brooklyn. There's more space.
Speaker 1: She is in Brooklyn. Right, I don't want to blowers
Speaker 1: I don't want to blowery cover. Fine. I think we're fine.
Speaker 1: She's pretty publicly Brooklyn face Brooklyn. Well, oh my god.
Speaker 1: You know what I watched the other night at the
Speaker 1: Greatest Showman. It was so good. I love British Showman.
Speaker 1: You and my you and my seven year old. That's Dreams.
Speaker 1: It's the Crickett favorite movie of all time. I love that.
Speaker 1: A Million Dreams is low key the best song Million Dreams. Well,
Speaker 1: first of all, never Enough as a moment and I
Speaker 1: turned to see you during Never Enough and I was like,
Speaker 1: this is a moment and she said, you're a flops
Speaker 1: all does her own singing rib? Oh? Is that that
Speaker 1: knowledge I did? I was just sort of like she
Speaker 1: did it's like a podcast. Okay, great, great, great, um,
Speaker 1: because I always hate if I ever am like, oh god,
Speaker 1: did I say a thing that like she didn't want
Speaker 1: publicly known. It's gonna end up in people mag oh um.
Speaker 1: I know. She was like during the dancing there was
Speaker 1: like some dancing sequence and she fully fucking like dislocated,
Speaker 1: broke like two ribs and was in so much pain.
Speaker 1: And yeah, I mean she's like that's a thing, like
Speaker 1: she is an incredible fucking dancer. I mean, Foster obviously
Speaker 1: showed the skills, but she's great. She was great in
Speaker 1: cat Cabaret, she's great in Greaterst Showman. And se Verdon
Speaker 1: was the perfect sort of like confluence of all of
Speaker 1: the jobs that she had had and all of the
Speaker 1: life experiences and then it was this just magical like
Speaker 1: orb of a part, and her playing Gwen Verdon was
Speaker 1: like transformative. I mean, I'm I don't know, I'm always
Speaker 1: in awe of like her abilities and talent. And then
Speaker 1: because she's the best person I know. That's another thing
Speaker 1: I love about you is your great best friend, and
Speaker 1: I think that rocks and I think the most important
Speaker 1: thing to me is friendship. But I recognize it. And
Speaker 1: that's why that very that day, I said to my sister,
Speaker 1: I said, that's us over there. I was like, I'll
Speaker 1: always be by your side and he probably won't even
Speaker 1: invite me to things, but when you're gonna are you
Speaker 1: nominated for have any nominations? No, I'm not. I I
Speaker 1: was going to know before we got into this. I
Speaker 1: was just like the other day, I thought to myself,
Speaker 1: I showed I showed my sister. My sister was like,
Speaker 1: has mappen in Atlanta? I was like, yeah, we we
Speaker 1: we did a show. We didn't I don't think so
Speaker 1: many here and went to the World of Coke. And
Speaker 1: then I showed her this stupid bit he was doing
Speaker 1: where he pretended to be Mariam Manudos at the World
Speaker 1: of Coke giving a tour. And I was like, and
Speaker 1: then I thought to myself, Oh, this is the funniest
Speaker 1: person in the world. This is the good, funniest, funniest, smartest,
Speaker 1: stupidest person in the world. So dearly and no, I agree,
Speaker 1: friends the most important thing. And there anyway, we are
Speaker 1: this is an incredible that you came by. I can't
Speaker 1: even tell you. I was like, it was like one
Speaker 1: of those it's one of those people. It's like, well,
Speaker 1: we could ask, but she probably wouldn't want to do this,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? What are you kidding? Anyway?
Speaker 1: I was always like, they don't want me on their show?
Speaker 1: What are you talking about that? Here's the thing, here's
Speaker 1: the thing. I I feel like in my life sometimes
Speaker 1: I'm like those people like obviously like I'm not cool
Speaker 1: enough or I'm not like a part of the thing whatever,
Speaker 1: and then they're like, oh, we would never have and
Speaker 1: I'm like, wait what I that's such a fucking bummer.
Speaker 1: All I've ever wanted to do was like hang, I
Speaker 1: just gonna say hang. Listen's line back in. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: put my kids to bed, my love in snapping back in. Listen.
Speaker 1: If you haven't stream Girls five ever on Peacock, you're
Speaker 1: making a huge fucking mistake. You're a flap. I don't
Speaker 1: like you yet until you stream it. Then we can
Speaker 1: talk because it's such a good show. Busies amazing, as
Speaker 1: is the whole cast. I mean we've been saying and
Speaker 1: bowen Yang is included in that um but wow, listen
Speaker 1: to Busy Phillips is doing her best. Pick up that book.
Speaker 1: This will only hurt a little. Do your research one
Speaker 1: to you. She didn't offer one to you, So you
Speaker 1: have nomination. Let me have the book. I'll send it
Speaker 1: to your sisters. I have my I have my inventive
Speaker 1: line back in a rights back in. So that means
Speaker 1: we're gonna come to a close. But we always bow
Speaker 1: and yang and with a song we're kind Let are
Speaker 1: not the words? Should we sing Michelle's song? All I
Speaker 1: want to sing busy song with Sarah and Paula and
Speaker 1: come in up coming, up coming, up coming up. For
Speaker 1: the rest of that listen to the Girl's side track
Speaker 1: featuring Busy Phillips, Bye Bye