1 00:00:01,120 --> 00:00:06,200 Speaker 1: Hey, oh hi, Damn, it's like you've had a black 2 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,119 Speaker 1: tea or something. I feel like there's a little caffeine 3 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:10,800 Speaker 1: up in there. Anyways, it feels like everything is so violent. 4 00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:13,680 Speaker 1: Like yesterday I was at a kid's birthday party and 5 00:00:13,760 --> 00:00:16,200 Speaker 1: we were just we were talking about like laundry, and 6 00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:18,520 Speaker 1: then like trying to find like a new daycare, like 7 00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:21,320 Speaker 1: a preschool, and then I just said, I just had 8 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:24,279 Speaker 1: got to bite the bullet. I'm like, why is everything 9 00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:26,840 Speaker 1: so violent in or our gun reference? 10 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:27,160 Speaker 2: Right? 11 00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:30,680 Speaker 3: Have you seen where we live? I mean, have you 12 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:35,320 Speaker 3: read that? No, we got a gun fetish. We gotta 13 00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:36,800 Speaker 3: find a new way to talk. We find a new 14 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:37,400 Speaker 3: way to talk. 15 00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:39,160 Speaker 1: We have to find a new way to talk because 16 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:42,640 Speaker 1: America does feel like the Costco of countries. It's just 17 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,080 Speaker 1: too big. There's too many aisles. No one can agree 18 00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 1: on anything, and where do we get our guns? Hey? Everyone, 19 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:50,680 Speaker 1: I'm Michelle Byte. This is Jordan Carlos. 20 00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:52,720 Speaker 2: Welcome to adulting. We're fine, We're fun. 21 00:01:10,880 --> 00:01:12,760 Speaker 3: I think that's something people do in their forties, is 22 00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:14,720 Speaker 3: they declare what they are. They're just like, do you 23 00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:16,119 Speaker 3: know what? I'm fun? 24 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:17,960 Speaker 1: You know what's so funny? I don't think it's like 25 00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:20,000 Speaker 1: a forties thing. I think it can happen like at 26 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,680 Speaker 1: any decade in your life, but it is that thing 27 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:24,920 Speaker 1: like fake it till you make it, Like who are 28 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:25,679 Speaker 1: we trying to convince? 29 00:01:25,760 --> 00:01:26,160 Speaker 4: You are me? 30 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:30,200 Speaker 1: Like I'm cool. I'm cool, you know, because you want 31 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:31,119 Speaker 1: to be cool? 32 00:01:31,319 --> 00:01:32,119 Speaker 4: And I get it. 33 00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:34,399 Speaker 1: I just went to a dinner party Saturday night and 34 00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:37,240 Speaker 1: I started talking about like wills, sure, like do you 35 00:01:37,319 --> 00:01:39,360 Speaker 1: guys have a will? Because Prince didn't have a will 36 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,720 Speaker 1: and like his estate has gone to the government. That's 37 00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:43,360 Speaker 1: like what he didn't want. And everyone's looking at me 38 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:45,560 Speaker 1: like are you okay? And I'm like, I promise you, 39 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:48,320 Speaker 1: I'm fun. I promise you, I'm very fun. But what 40 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:50,760 Speaker 1: it is is like, you know, I am happy clown. 41 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:53,320 Speaker 1: I'm a happy big titty top titty meat freckle face. 42 00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:56,840 Speaker 1: How you doing, bitch? And so when do you get 43 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:58,520 Speaker 1: to the meat and potatoes? You know what I mean? 44 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,400 Speaker 1: Like truly, we just want to get to the meat 45 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:00,960 Speaker 1: and potatoes. 46 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:02,720 Speaker 3: Yes, And you want to be able to have like 47 00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 3: a conversation with your friends about a certain topic that's 48 00:02:05,760 --> 00:02:08,680 Speaker 3: relevant to you and likely relevant to them with it 49 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:10,680 Speaker 3: being you know, keep it, like keep it moving. But 50 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:12,960 Speaker 3: sometimes people are like, well, why you bring that up? 51 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,880 Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying. It's like, because we can't 52 00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:17,480 Speaker 3: always talk about love is blind, all right, we have 53 00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:23,639 Speaker 3: to there's other things, you know. By the way, speaking 54 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:25,920 Speaker 3: speaking of light, I love the floral print. I like 55 00:02:25,919 --> 00:02:27,480 Speaker 3: your top looks good, looks fun. 56 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:28,240 Speaker 2: Uh, thank you. 57 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:31,240 Speaker 1: It's actually a dress with like no back, and I 58 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:33,720 Speaker 1: have to say, like, I am definitely living my plus 59 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:38,359 Speaker 1: size boho dream in the summertime. I'm so glad that 60 00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:41,840 Speaker 1: the fashion industry has decided to take my money. It 61 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:45,840 Speaker 1: is nice to wear something that's not black, because I 62 00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,400 Speaker 1: say this all the time, like growing up, everything was 63 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:50,280 Speaker 1: black and I just look like a Greek widow. People 64 00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,480 Speaker 1: would definitely be like thoughts and prayers every time I 65 00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:56,360 Speaker 1: went to a pool party. So this is very fun 66 00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:59,880 Speaker 1: for me. So thank you for noticing. Of course, yeah, 67 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:00,600 Speaker 1: of course. 68 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:03,239 Speaker 3: I mean this is a sonic medium, so not everybody knows. 69 00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:05,920 Speaker 3: But Michelle looks fun. She's got kind of like a 70 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:08,480 Speaker 3: half puff sleeve going on or like on the shoulders, 71 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:09,240 Speaker 3: a little half puff. 72 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:13,160 Speaker 1: Yes, it's giving like a boho Puerto Rican sid rella 73 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:17,720 Speaker 1: la la la la la. I'm fine. There's belts my size, 74 00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:20,240 Speaker 1: which is very exciting. Like I used to borrow my 75 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:22,640 Speaker 1: dad's belts, Oh my god. I mean now I would, 76 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:24,959 Speaker 1: but like I didn't have Tilda Swinton back in the 77 00:03:25,040 --> 00:03:29,280 Speaker 1: day to be like, what is this? This is cool anyways, 78 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:30,720 Speaker 1: I'm I'm cool. 79 00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:33,920 Speaker 4: No, you're fun. Listen. It's just something my six year 80 00:03:33,919 --> 00:03:35,800 Speaker 4: old never says. You know what I'm saying. My six 81 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:37,640 Speaker 4: year old is never like I'm fun. 82 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:41,680 Speaker 3: He's just out there cartwheeling and doing wild stuff and 83 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:42,440 Speaker 3: eating worms. 84 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:44,080 Speaker 4: He's fun, you know what I'm saying. 85 00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 1: When we had like a family hang the other day 86 00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:49,800 Speaker 1: and your son brought a friend, it was probably the 87 00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:51,360 Speaker 1: cutest thing I've ever seen. 88 00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:52,120 Speaker 2: Was giving. 89 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:55,360 Speaker 1: It was giving Blackish means wonder years. I'm just like, 90 00:03:56,640 --> 00:04:00,160 Speaker 1: I'm fun. You guys, I watch TV. I'm cool. Well 91 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:01,240 Speaker 1: I don't. 92 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:03,160 Speaker 2: I try. I just fall asleep. 93 00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:05,560 Speaker 1: But yeah, it was so nice to see like this 94 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:08,400 Speaker 1: bright smile on his face because he had a friend 95 00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:08,800 Speaker 1: with him. 96 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:09,640 Speaker 2: You know what I mean. 97 00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:11,520 Speaker 3: He has this little partner in crime. He has a 98 00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:15,080 Speaker 3: couple of them, their little besties. Their role does It's amazing. 99 00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:18,400 Speaker 3: The thing that they do is like every time his 100 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:22,640 Speaker 3: friend's mom comes to pick them up, they go hide. Yeah, 101 00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:25,960 Speaker 3: I'm like, has this ever worked? When you guys you hide, 102 00:04:26,040 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 3: we always find you. And then I was like, you 103 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:29,159 Speaker 3: know what, just go hide? 104 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:29,760 Speaker 4: Go ahead. 105 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:30,240 Speaker 5: Yeah. 106 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:33,560 Speaker 1: There is that thing when you're not just a parent 107 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:35,760 Speaker 1: but also a caretaker of children where you're just like, 108 00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:39,680 Speaker 1: when do you guys figure out what is logical? When 109 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:42,080 Speaker 1: do you understand what really makes sense? 110 00:04:42,480 --> 00:04:42,920 Speaker 4: Yeah? 111 00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:45,640 Speaker 1: I had this therapist. I no longer have him, but 112 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:47,440 Speaker 1: he was you know, when you get what you need 113 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,120 Speaker 1: out of a therapist, it's like sort of like going 114 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:50,640 Speaker 1: to the same restaurant and getting the same thing all 115 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:53,960 Speaker 1: the time. You're like, I did it. But one invaluable 116 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:56,360 Speaker 1: piece of advice that he gave me, which I love, 117 00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:58,200 Speaker 1: is that some people are on their own planet, so 118 00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:00,159 Speaker 1: you just have to learn how to speak their language. 119 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:03,360 Speaker 1: And so I'm always just like because I have twins 120 00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:07,080 Speaker 1: and they are so different, but they're still for you know, yeah, 121 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:09,680 Speaker 1: what makes sense to her, it all makes sense to him, 122 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:12,520 Speaker 1: and vice versa. So I'm like speaking all these different 123 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:14,840 Speaker 1: languages and it's just like yeah, but Otis would say it. 124 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:17,560 Speaker 3: Like that all can I ask do they have a 125 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:19,240 Speaker 3: language like a secret language between them? 126 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:20,279 Speaker 4: Because I hear twins. 127 00:05:20,560 --> 00:05:25,000 Speaker 1: Yes, interesting, they always had they do. I try to 128 00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:27,280 Speaker 1: pick up on it, and they don't really say words. 129 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:30,040 Speaker 1: They like do motions and pointed stuff and do stuff 130 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:33,360 Speaker 1: with their faces. So yeah, I hope they don't kill 131 00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:38,839 Speaker 1: me because I'll never see it coming. I'm fun, I'm. 132 00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:44,520 Speaker 3: Cool man last words, Yeah. 133 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:43,960 Speaker 4: What do you mean? 134 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:45,360 Speaker 1: I look like I need a drink? What do you 135 00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:48,520 Speaker 1: mean I should stop drinking coffee? I mean it works? 136 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:52,159 Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Oh and you would 137 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:56,480 Speaker 1: be very proud of me. I tried a mushroom chocolate 138 00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:58,040 Speaker 1: or is it a chocolate mushroom? 139 00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:02,520 Speaker 4: I love it. You're like it was a mushroom chocolate? 140 00:06:02,720 --> 00:06:03,760 Speaker 4: Oh was it a chocolate? 141 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:05,080 Speaker 3: No? 142 00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 1: I truly, I'm truly so dyslexic. I don't know how 143 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:11,880 Speaker 1: it goes. I'm like, I see woman king and king 144 00:06:11,920 --> 00:06:13,680 Speaker 1: woman and people are like, just pick one. I'm like, 145 00:06:13,839 --> 00:06:15,880 Speaker 1: you tell me which one's right. I won't always like 146 00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:20,039 Speaker 1: forget because I'm cool. I'm fine. I mean, come on, 147 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 1: but it was very dangerous because the chocolate was good, 148 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:28,000 Speaker 1: and you know what edibles, you know what happens. You 149 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:30,919 Speaker 1: guys were always like, I don't feel anything. Let me 150 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:34,040 Speaker 1: take some more and that is a mistake. That is 151 00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:36,720 Speaker 1: a mistake that Kelly Clarkson hasn't written a song about yet, 152 00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:38,600 Speaker 1: but she wrote about every other mistake. 153 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:44,200 Speaker 4: So did you have a nice experience? 154 00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:46,280 Speaker 1: I did you know? It was towards the end of 155 00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:50,720 Speaker 1: the night. I already had some wine, some great conversation. 156 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:52,719 Speaker 1: I was ready to go home and take my shoes 157 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:54,680 Speaker 1: off of my broth and so, like, I think it 158 00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:57,240 Speaker 1: hit me on the way home, and then it was 159 00:06:57,279 --> 00:06:59,360 Speaker 1: a nice ride. I saw the lights they were pretty 160 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:02,039 Speaker 1: took a shit, went to bed, had to go sleep. 161 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 4: So it's all about I'm so happy for you. 162 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:06,400 Speaker 3: I think it's so strange because like I was in 163 00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:08,520 Speaker 3: the DARE program as a kid, you know, I was like, 164 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:13,160 Speaker 3: no one is getting drugs into this sanctuary. 165 00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:14,480 Speaker 1: You know, thank you Nancy Reagan. 166 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, thank you Nancy Reagan. And I feel like 167 00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 3: I totally want to change my relationship, yeah, with drugs. 168 00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:25,240 Speaker 3: I'm trying not to take this as like a midlife crisis, 169 00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:28,880 Speaker 3: but I'm like, uh, you know, I'm just trying new things. 170 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 3: And I happen to be forty five. 171 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:35,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, one hundred. It's all about control, right, Yeah, And 172 00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:38,480 Speaker 1: it's just like you're never happy and you're never sat right, 173 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:40,600 Speaker 1: Like in your twenties you're supposed to fuck around and 174 00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:42,320 Speaker 1: find out, but then like it's always like get your 175 00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:44,000 Speaker 1: shit together, get your shit together. In your thirties, why 176 00:07:44,040 --> 00:07:45,640 Speaker 1: don't you marry with you kids and your foys. It's 177 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:48,360 Speaker 1: like you should be settled down wherehereas your retirement is this, 178 00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:50,360 Speaker 1: like we could still be out here trying new things. 179 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,040 Speaker 1: You're really never too old. And this is why I 180 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:54,640 Speaker 1: was just like I could retire in Amsterdam because I 181 00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:57,280 Speaker 1: went to something called a balloon party there at Paradiso, 182 00:07:57,320 --> 00:07:59,280 Speaker 1: which is like the website hall, Like that's the place 183 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,120 Speaker 1: you want to go to for a concert. That was 184 00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:03,320 Speaker 1: our first date in Amsterdam together. He took Nico sie 185 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:06,520 Speaker 1: er Kabadu okay HEARDUSO has this dope party the weekend 186 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:08,800 Speaker 1: between Christmas and New Year' where it's called the Balloon Party. 187 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,520 Speaker 1: They have a DJ, they have a theme. Everyone dresses 188 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:14,000 Speaker 1: up like that theme and then like at a certain hour, 189 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:16,320 Speaker 1: a bunch of balloons come down from the ceiling and 190 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:19,120 Speaker 1: they all have drugs in them. Oh that part, yes, 191 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:21,200 Speaker 1: and you pop the balloon. You do drugs and everyone's like, 192 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:24,920 Speaker 1: and I don't remember the theme. When I went, I 193 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:27,320 Speaker 1: think it was like mystical or magical or some bullshit. 194 00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:29,920 Speaker 1: It was years ago. Yeah, but I saw a lady 195 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:33,520 Speaker 1: like late sixties, early seventies, dressed up as snow white, 196 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:37,240 Speaker 1: red lips, looking cute. Definitely been in the sun. I'm 197 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:39,760 Speaker 1: not gonna judge her journey, but definitely eating like hair 198 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:42,240 Speaker 1: and getting all the fish oil and her body Hi 199 00:08:42,880 --> 00:08:45,600 Speaker 1: sure responsibly high. And I say that because everyone, like, 200 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:47,040 Speaker 1: you know, there was a thing where people are just like, 201 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:49,439 Speaker 1: you're Hi, You're fucking crazy. It's just like, no, Yeah, 202 00:08:49,520 --> 00:08:52,560 Speaker 1: she is riding a beautiful wave, enjoying the rest of 203 00:08:52,559 --> 00:08:56,920 Speaker 1: her life. And I'm like, I could retire here and 204 00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:58,720 Speaker 1: be a Puerto Rican snow white somewhere in the middle 205 00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:00,760 Speaker 1: of fucking amsterair with my backfat and stop titty me, 206 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,640 Speaker 1: you know what, because I'm fun. 207 00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:06,160 Speaker 4: And on that note, let's have some more fun. Let's 208 00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:07,240 Speaker 4: talk to our guests. 209 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:13,199 Speaker 3: Yes, folks, one time, one time for Jess, Tom give 210 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:13,920 Speaker 3: it up, prop. 211 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:22,760 Speaker 2: Up, Jess, Jess, Oh my god, what's up? 212 00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:24,840 Speaker 1: Do you remember the first time we met? I don't remember. 213 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:25,560 Speaker 3: I do. 214 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:30,359 Speaker 5: Actually this is actually really funny, Michelle. You and I 215 00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:34,480 Speaker 5: did a gig at Barnard College. Yes, that's what it was, 216 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,080 Speaker 5: twenty sixteen, a long time ago, and there were you 217 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:41,240 Speaker 5: going there. No, they just had me open for you. 218 00:09:41,679 --> 00:09:43,880 Speaker 1: And this is like, my memory is terrible. 219 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,120 Speaker 5: I was just gonna say, I must have been really 220 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:48,040 Speaker 5: new at comedy at that time. 221 00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:49,480 Speaker 1: But you were really good. 222 00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 2: Oh thank you. 223 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:52,840 Speaker 1: Did you do like one story the whole time? Or 224 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:54,360 Speaker 1: was it a series of jokes? Because I feel like 225 00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:55,760 Speaker 1: it was a long bit. 226 00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:56,880 Speaker 2: To my memory. 227 00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:58,720 Speaker 5: If it was around when I thought it was, which 228 00:09:58,760 --> 00:09:59,800 Speaker 5: is like twenty fifteen. 229 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:01,760 Speaker 2: I worked at a sex shop. 230 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,800 Speaker 5: At that time, and all of my material was about 231 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:04,800 Speaker 5: working at the sex shop. 232 00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:09,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, wait a minute, we had this in our 233 00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:11,240 Speaker 1: notes and I was gonna ask you, but I was like, 234 00:10:11,520 --> 00:10:13,640 Speaker 1: how is this all coming together? Like it feels like 235 00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:17,199 Speaker 1: a celeindion coming back to me now. But it wasn't 236 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:20,000 Speaker 1: just any sex shop. It was a luxury sex shop. Yes, 237 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,920 Speaker 1: what is the difference that? Do I need to know? 238 00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:25,880 Speaker 4: Yeah? Let me think also address. 239 00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:30,480 Speaker 5: Yeah, the key difference between a quote unquote upscale sex 240 00:10:30,559 --> 00:10:33,320 Speaker 5: shop and like a kind of standard sex shop is 241 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:36,360 Speaker 5: that at a standard sex shop, you walk in, you 242 00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:39,679 Speaker 5: mind your business, You're wearing sunglasses, you go and. 243 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:40,320 Speaker 2: Get what you want. 244 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:45,640 Speaker 5: Yeah, you pay your money and you leave with your shame. 245 00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:48,160 Speaker 5: And in an upscale sex shop, you walk in and 246 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,120 Speaker 5: people go, hi, welcome, what can I help you with? 247 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:51,240 Speaker 2: Oh wow? 248 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:56,680 Speaker 5: And then you have to divulge to them your secrets. Yeah, 249 00:10:56,720 --> 00:10:58,680 Speaker 5: I think you've never told anyone else before. 250 00:10:59,520 --> 00:11:03,800 Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, So yo, did you use this in 251 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:04,640 Speaker 1: your stand up? 252 00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:07,280 Speaker 5: That used to be what all of my stand up 253 00:11:07,559 --> 00:11:09,120 Speaker 5: was about. And I used to be like, Oh, I 254 00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,080 Speaker 5: wonder what's gonna happen after I quit the sex shop? Like, 255 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:15,280 Speaker 5: am I gonna have a point of view anymore? Do 256 00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:17,880 Speaker 5: I have a perspective on life? 257 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,520 Speaker 4: It's hard to follow that act. 258 00:11:19,559 --> 00:11:21,360 Speaker 3: It's like when you see the world through the lens 259 00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:22,840 Speaker 3: of the sex shop, that is pretty wild. 260 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:24,520 Speaker 4: People come in with needs. 261 00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:28,920 Speaker 5: Yeah, it was very kind of I don't know, scandalous 262 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,079 Speaker 5: and like sensational at the time. But then it turns 263 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,120 Speaker 5: out most of the details of my life are scandalous 264 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:33,840 Speaker 5: and sensational. 265 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,719 Speaker 2: So oh really, yeah, there you go, I guess. 266 00:11:37,040 --> 00:11:38,120 Speaker 4: And what do you mean by that? 267 00:11:38,120 --> 00:11:40,280 Speaker 1: I mean, you don't just gotta be follow up. 268 00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 4: What's been the latest scandal? 269 00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:49,160 Speaker 5: Well, it's just funny because like now I mean, I 270 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:52,560 Speaker 5: just started touring with an hour for the first time. 271 00:11:52,760 --> 00:11:57,679 Speaker 5: I've never done that before. Congratulations, sweetie, thank you, thank you, 272 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:01,200 Speaker 5: And so much of my material I have, like I 273 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,760 Speaker 5: don't know how long it actually is, but I want 274 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 5: to say it's like five to seven minutes, just on 275 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:09,040 Speaker 5: the kinds of porn I like to watch m mm hmm. 276 00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:10,960 Speaker 5: Like I feel like something that was kind of born 277 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,360 Speaker 5: out of the pandemic, Like I just kind of went 278 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:15,440 Speaker 5: into like what's really important to. 279 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,760 Speaker 2: Me and like that's what it was. 280 00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:19,040 Speaker 5: Yeah, and now I have to re enter into the 281 00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:20,760 Speaker 5: world and be like this is what I have to say, 282 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,600 Speaker 5: Like does anyone want to hear that? I don't know, 283 00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:24,800 Speaker 5: Like my parents are sitting in the front row, like 284 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:27,559 Speaker 5: is that I mean, is that what they wanted to hear? 285 00:12:27,640 --> 00:12:30,400 Speaker 1: Look, education through love, That's what I say, Education through 286 00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:31,520 Speaker 1: love and laughta. 287 00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,199 Speaker 2: And honesty and truth and honestly we got to live 288 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:34,679 Speaker 2: our truth. 289 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,360 Speaker 1: And so many follow up questions. And I know that 290 00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:39,600 Speaker 1: you have one too, Jordan, because he's got his hands 291 00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:43,160 Speaker 1: together like a politician waiting to answer a question from 292 00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:44,800 Speaker 1: like a fifteen year old on the stage. 293 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:45,400 Speaker 2: I get it. 294 00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:48,360 Speaker 1: I get it, Okay, So I worked retail when I 295 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:51,080 Speaker 1: was in high school. Every retail store I worked in 296 00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:54,040 Speaker 1: Jersey Mall, there was never like my size, but people 297 00:12:54,120 --> 00:12:56,360 Speaker 1: my size would come in and I would like try 298 00:12:56,400 --> 00:13:00,320 Speaker 1: to help them navigate what their choices could be, sort 299 00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:02,839 Speaker 1: of like be a shoulder to like cry on when 300 00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:05,480 Speaker 1: they're just like none of as fits. And that was 301 00:13:05,559 --> 00:13:09,760 Speaker 1: just like skater boy clothes. I can't even imagine what 302 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,680 Speaker 1: kind of role you must take on in a sex 303 00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:16,680 Speaker 1: shop to help people figure out like the best decision 304 00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:18,640 Speaker 1: and what it could do for you, but also like 305 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:22,840 Speaker 1: kind of let them know that it's okay. M Like, 306 00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:26,240 Speaker 1: I mean, you are a full time associate, part time 307 00:13:26,679 --> 00:13:27,720 Speaker 1: sex therapist. 308 00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:32,520 Speaker 5: It was really being a therapist to like mid thirties 309 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:37,120 Speaker 5: straight professional women who had like yeah, I never had 310 00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:40,080 Speaker 5: an orgasm, like never tried a sex toy. 311 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:41,079 Speaker 2: They were like, is. 312 00:13:41,040 --> 00:13:44,040 Speaker 5: It okay that my boyfriend told me that I smell like? 313 00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:45,880 Speaker 5: I was like, don't let he can't tell you that. 314 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:48,240 Speaker 5: I was like twenty three years old, this like a 315 00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:51,240 Speaker 5: twenty three year old queer person. Yeah, being like your 316 00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:53,240 Speaker 5: man can't talk to you that way. But also like 317 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:53,959 Speaker 5: what did I know. 318 00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:56,800 Speaker 1: You knew right from wrong? 319 00:13:57,280 --> 00:13:57,480 Speaker 5: Yeah? 320 00:13:57,640 --> 00:13:58,360 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah. 321 00:13:58,400 --> 00:14:01,600 Speaker 5: Well, that's the thing that's really terrifying is that I 322 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:02,920 Speaker 5: actually know a lot more than them. 323 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:04,280 Speaker 2: Yeah. 324 00:14:04,559 --> 00:14:08,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, Oh so okay, when you said your parents were 325 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:11,400 Speaker 3: in the front row, they came to the hour, they. 326 00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 5: Came to see me in San Francisco, which is where 327 00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:18,160 Speaker 5: I'm from. Wonderful and how was Oh my god, this 328 00:14:18,240 --> 00:14:20,520 Speaker 5: is so heavy, you guys. I didn't realize we were 329 00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:22,160 Speaker 5: going to start off immediately with that. 330 00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:24,720 Speaker 4: Well you you dropped. 331 00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:26,320 Speaker 1: It also, like Jess, like, when am I going to 332 00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:29,280 Speaker 1: see you like at a festival in passing in an elevator, Like, 333 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:31,360 Speaker 1: I know, let's just get to it. 334 00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:33,600 Speaker 5: So we have to get to the heavy stuff. I 335 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:35,800 Speaker 5: want to be just one hundred percent honest with you 336 00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:39,600 Speaker 5: guys that I just started living alone recently, so this 337 00:14:39,680 --> 00:14:43,000 Speaker 5: is my first social interaction of the day, and I 338 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:46,120 Speaker 5: feel like it's better to be honest about my state 339 00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:47,160 Speaker 5: of mind in this moment. 340 00:14:47,440 --> 00:14:47,800 Speaker 2: Yeah. 341 00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:50,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, we're doing a lot of stuff, so you have 342 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:53,280 Speaker 1: you have an hour, which is a really big thing 343 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,240 Speaker 1: to take an hour out as a comedian, especially when 344 00:14:56,280 --> 00:14:59,480 Speaker 1: that you're proud of. Yeah, your parents are watching you perform, 345 00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:03,080 Speaker 1: they are okay, and you're living by yourself. 346 00:15:02,840 --> 00:15:04,200 Speaker 2: Yes, these are all facts. 347 00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,560 Speaker 4: These are the facts. 348 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:09,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, this is adultaying next level, Yeah truly, But I 349 00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:11,640 Speaker 1: don't want to miss out on what it was like 350 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:16,600 Speaker 1: for you to like bear your soul in very carefully 351 00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:19,800 Speaker 1: curated nuggets of funny in front of them. 352 00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:23,240 Speaker 5: I'm curious if you guys relate to any of this. 353 00:15:23,360 --> 00:15:26,240 Speaker 5: But I feel like the major style in my family 354 00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:31,760 Speaker 5: is like repression and like yeah, just kind of not 355 00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:36,880 Speaker 5: talking about things that everybody knows, yes, is happening for me. 356 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:40,480 Speaker 5: The biggest thing is that I was like my parents 357 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:44,840 Speaker 5: don't know and like other family members who also came 358 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:48,120 Speaker 5: to the show, they're supportive enough to come out and 359 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:51,760 Speaker 5: see me like do this cool thing, but like they 360 00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:55,960 Speaker 5: just learned all this stuff about me. Yep that they 361 00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:59,960 Speaker 5: would have had no idea. Yeah, and like really big 362 00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:03,240 Speaker 5: things like it shows me where the holes are. I'm like, oh, 363 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,920 Speaker 5: like I haven't talked to some of these people about 364 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:08,920 Speaker 5: like transitioning. 365 00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:10,000 Speaker 2: Like really huge things in my life. 366 00:16:10,120 --> 00:16:12,280 Speaker 5: Yeah yeah that I'm like, now I'm going to talk 367 00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:16,000 Speaker 5: in like disgusting detail about what this process has been 368 00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:18,520 Speaker 5: like for me. Yeah, and they don't even know I'm 369 00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:19,480 Speaker 5: doing it. 370 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:22,040 Speaker 1: It's actually like and this is probably why we're all 371 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:24,040 Speaker 1: on this zoom together doing a podcast. We do what 372 00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:27,120 Speaker 1: we do because it's actually easier for me to process 373 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:30,880 Speaker 1: in art what is happening when I'm going through and 374 00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,120 Speaker 1: then present it and like that's how I'm going to 375 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:36,160 Speaker 1: tell you, because I've tried to talk to you my 376 00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:40,720 Speaker 1: whole life, and it's never a conversation. It is a debate. 377 00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:43,920 Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm just like, did you hear me? Do you 378 00:16:43,960 --> 00:16:47,160 Speaker 1: want to say something besides what's for dinner? Totally, it's 379 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:50,680 Speaker 1: also like our magic, it's our superpower because we are 380 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:55,440 Speaker 1: also helping people have some sort of vocabulary. Like anytime 381 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:59,720 Speaker 1: my mom has a question about anything and her new 382 00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,440 Speaker 1: thing is like what is non binary? 383 00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:01,640 Speaker 2: Right? 384 00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:04,080 Speaker 1: And so I just sent her to a Loaks page 385 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:08,480 Speaker 1: and I'm like, read what you can process? Come back 386 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:11,960 Speaker 1: to a bitch. All of that fucking helps not just us, 387 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:15,119 Speaker 1: but other people too. And we don't even like motherfucker realize, 388 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,080 Speaker 1: which is also good too, because if we did, we 389 00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:19,720 Speaker 1: just I don't know, like ourselves a lot more. 390 00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:23,359 Speaker 2: I know what would that be like? Imagine that I 391 00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:23,800 Speaker 2: don't know. 392 00:17:24,119 --> 00:17:25,800 Speaker 3: Before I go on stage, I'm like, all I have 393 00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:28,360 Speaker 3: to do is embrace myself for this hour, then if 394 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,200 Speaker 3: I want to, I can go back to hating myself. 395 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:33,120 Speaker 4: Yeah, but like for the hour, I gotta like myself. 396 00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:34,880 Speaker 4: And I wonder what was. 397 00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:38,040 Speaker 3: Your family's response and did you care that much or 398 00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:39,720 Speaker 3: was it just like we gon get this over with? 399 00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:40,840 Speaker 4: What did it feel like? 400 00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:42,920 Speaker 2: I mean to give you the basic idea. 401 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:46,119 Speaker 5: What happened after the show when I saw my mom 402 00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:48,199 Speaker 5: was she came right up to me and was like, 403 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,720 Speaker 5: Jess TMI. 404 00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:54,360 Speaker 2: And I was like, like, what did you think of it? 405 00:17:54,359 --> 00:17:59,880 Speaker 5: You were gonna yeah, because like definitely like you're right, 406 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:04,240 Speaker 5: it is GMI for you probably, And I actually was 407 00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:06,440 Speaker 5: like maybe I should have warned them. 408 00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:11,600 Speaker 1: No, no, you know what, because you've done enough, Like 409 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,720 Speaker 1: you've done the work. We gotta do what we. 410 00:18:13,640 --> 00:18:16,600 Speaker 5: Gotta do, I know, And I feel you about like 411 00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:19,120 Speaker 5: the way that the joke is. I actually forget all 412 00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:22,760 Speaker 5: the time that I'm not a clean comic and that 413 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:25,280 Speaker 5: like it's actually quite hard for me to do what 414 00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:28,080 Speaker 5: people would count as a clean set because I'm like, oh, 415 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:32,119 Speaker 5: it's like educational, it's analytical, it's metaphorical. I'm like painting 416 00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:36,040 Speaker 5: a picture. I'm not like humping a stool or anything. Yeah, 417 00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:39,640 Speaker 5: very it's very kind of theoretical, but I forget that 418 00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:42,679 Speaker 5: that's not how people think about sex. 419 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:48,520 Speaker 1: I know words have power, and especially sorry to our 420 00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:53,439 Speaker 1: white male listeners, you guys are the best, But like, 421 00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:56,720 Speaker 1: it is always difficult for people to swallow that pill 422 00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,840 Speaker 1: when you actually have an opinion about it or something. 423 00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:03,199 Speaker 1: If we were to like take our shirt off on 424 00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:06,919 Speaker 1: stage and just like yell shit, like, I don't know why, 425 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,480 Speaker 1: that's like a better pill to swallow. Now I'm just 426 00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:11,480 Speaker 1: going off about stand uple's talk about something else. 427 00:19:11,560 --> 00:19:15,280 Speaker 3: Maybe, No, I really I think it's a moment in 428 00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,360 Speaker 3: all comedians' lives where they have to perform in front 429 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:21,280 Speaker 3: of their parents. You know, it's just this thing where 430 00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:23,960 Speaker 3: it's like whatever fantasy you have in your head about 431 00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,080 Speaker 3: how they're going to react is not how they're going 432 00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:28,439 Speaker 3: to react at all. In that moment, you have to 433 00:19:28,480 --> 00:19:31,159 Speaker 3: be satisfied with what you've done and let the cards 434 00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:33,639 Speaker 3: kind of like follow where they may. Because my father 435 00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:36,120 Speaker 3: heckled me the first time I performed in front of him. 436 00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:38,200 Speaker 2: You know, no, no, what did you say? 437 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,960 Speaker 4: I think I said something about being broken. He's like, 438 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:44,199 Speaker 4: you've never been broken your life. You don't know what 439 00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:47,040 Speaker 4: you're talking about. I was like, who's that is that? 440 00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:51,840 Speaker 4: My father? And my father was asked to leave this 441 00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:52,400 Speaker 4: theater that. 442 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,000 Speaker 2: I was yeah, yeah, he was just remember that. 443 00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:59,600 Speaker 4: Just remember it. No worse probably than my dad like 444 00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:02,080 Speaker 4: getting hed. I was like, what are you doing? And 445 00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:06,600 Speaker 4: then after he's like, I was helping I was helping you. Yeah, 446 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:07,400 Speaker 4: it was funny. 447 00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:09,760 Speaker 3: I was just gonna say, I remember the first time 448 00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,280 Speaker 3: we performed together, Jess. Do you remember it was like 449 00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:13,960 Speaker 3: a castle or something like that. 450 00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:17,920 Speaker 2: What it was like a fortress. It was a. 451 00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:22,159 Speaker 5: Fortress on like the East side or something. 452 00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:24,960 Speaker 3: Yes, I think it was an old school like with 453 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:26,800 Speaker 3: a was an armory or something like that. 454 00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:27,800 Speaker 4: It was wild. 455 00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:30,280 Speaker 3: It was like the city used to have back in 456 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:32,400 Speaker 3: the day, right because they thought the city would get invaded. 457 00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:34,520 Speaker 3: So they're like, we got to build some castles around here. 458 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,119 Speaker 3: So there's like some are they're like hidden but in 459 00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:40,000 Speaker 3: plain sight, like one on twenty thursdry ones like on 460 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:42,280 Speaker 3: Park Avenue in like the sixties or whatever. And like 461 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:44,960 Speaker 3: so it's me, Jess, a couple of other people, the 462 00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:47,040 Speaker 3: dude who directed Boomerang is hosting this night. 463 00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:50,960 Speaker 2: What it was wild to my memory, it was a 464 00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:53,200 Speaker 2: night of like political comedy. 465 00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:55,720 Speaker 5: Yes, and like it was another one of those things 466 00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:57,760 Speaker 5: where like it sort of made sense, it made sense 467 00:20:57,840 --> 00:20:59,879 Speaker 5: you were on there, it made sense. Like a lot 468 00:20:59,920 --> 00:21:03,000 Speaker 5: of the other comics were like older and like wrote 469 00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:06,000 Speaker 5: for like political late night shows. And then like I 470 00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:08,000 Speaker 5: was there and it was just kind of one of 471 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:11,240 Speaker 5: those things where I was like, oh, yeah, I guess yeah, 472 00:21:11,359 --> 00:21:13,800 Speaker 5: just by virtue of me being like who I am, 473 00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:17,120 Speaker 5: Like someone has decided that I'm like political, my material 474 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:19,160 Speaker 5: is all about sex shop Like. 475 00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:23,160 Speaker 1: That is hilarious when you do realize that you are 476 00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:24,360 Speaker 1: the token. 477 00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:28,320 Speaker 3: You were the token. We had to wait in this room. 478 00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:31,399 Speaker 3: It was where they did target practice what back in 479 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,879 Speaker 3: the day. Yes, And then I looked, I swear to 480 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:36,199 Speaker 3: got the painting, the oil painting. The eyes moved just 481 00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:37,919 Speaker 3: I don't know about you with those eyes were moving. 482 00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:38,200 Speaker 4: No. 483 00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:43,600 Speaker 3: This one soldier was like, yeah. 484 00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:43,040 Speaker 2: I wasn't looking. 485 00:21:43,160 --> 00:21:45,280 Speaker 5: I went into that building and was like I don't 486 00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:46,680 Speaker 5: think I'm supposed to be in here. 487 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:49,480 Speaker 2: Like I was like, is that shark YOUTERI? I have 488 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:50,000 Speaker 2: some of that. 489 00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:54,000 Speaker 3: No. It was redolent with like white supremacy. There were trophies. 490 00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:57,600 Speaker 3: It was a trophy room. There was a sterling trophies. 491 00:21:58,359 --> 00:22:00,280 Speaker 3: We performed in this room. It was like something out 492 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:02,640 Speaker 3: of Game of Thrones and it was only Upper East 493 00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:05,399 Speaker 3: Side retirees. Yes, and I was like, I am dancing 494 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:07,720 Speaker 3: for my life up here? Where's that check? 495 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:11,200 Speaker 5: It was like a platform in the middle of the room, yes, 496 00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:13,120 Speaker 5: with like everybody around us. 497 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:17,560 Speaker 1: No, like tribute yeah, oh my it's given get out? 498 00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:22,080 Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, it was extremely get out. Yes, it was 499 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:25,000 Speaker 5: very haunted, like old world haunted. 500 00:22:25,480 --> 00:22:29,160 Speaker 1: I mean old money means like old views, right, and 501 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:34,399 Speaker 1: from when I'm hearing, this is their hope of seeing 502 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:37,840 Speaker 1: how the other side lives. Let's invite them over. But like, 503 00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:41,960 Speaker 1: that's not how you present it. That sounds wild. And 504 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:43,920 Speaker 1: I've been in shows like that before where I'm like, 505 00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,040 Speaker 1: let me just drop a motherfucker. 506 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:50,200 Speaker 2: Pit, right, does anyone know where I am? Right now? 507 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:52,080 Speaker 2: We have to have a last location? 508 00:22:52,440 --> 00:23:11,120 Speaker 1: Oh boom, are you even? I just want to talk 509 00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:14,320 Speaker 1: about living alone if you don't mind. 510 00:23:14,119 --> 00:23:15,920 Speaker 2: Because like, yes, yes, totally. 511 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:19,000 Speaker 1: You know, we talk about fun shit, realized shit, but 512 00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:22,160 Speaker 1: like wow, wow, wow, wow wow, there's nothing more adult 513 00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:26,360 Speaker 1: than choosing yourself and living alone. Are you in New York? 514 00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:29,480 Speaker 5: I am, Yeah, I just moved to Brooklyn. After living 515 00:23:29,480 --> 00:23:31,240 Speaker 5: in Queens for like eight years. 516 00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:34,639 Speaker 4: Oh wow, okay, wonderful. Do you like it? Do you 517 00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:35,399 Speaker 4: like the neighborhood? 518 00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,560 Speaker 5: I like it, but it's a big change for me. 519 00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:43,400 Speaker 5: It's a big kind of culture shock. Oh yeah, Well 520 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:48,200 Speaker 5: I was living in Woodside, Queens by Jackson Heights, and 521 00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:52,000 Speaker 5: I realized in the pandemic that I had basically chosen 522 00:23:52,520 --> 00:23:56,920 Speaker 5: like proximity to Asian food over like anyone I know. 523 00:23:57,080 --> 00:24:00,800 Speaker 2: Ell oh ell yeah yeah. 524 00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:03,000 Speaker 5: And so I was like, when it came time to move, 525 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:04,960 Speaker 5: I was like, what if I made the opposite choice? 526 00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:07,800 Speaker 5: And it turns out it is. It's the exact opposite choice, 527 00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:12,240 Speaker 5: and I'm not sure that it's worth it to me. 528 00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:17,080 Speaker 5: I actually am like, maybe I liked all that Asian food, yeah, better. 529 00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:17,919 Speaker 2: Than anyone I know. 530 00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:19,320 Speaker 4: Not a lot of hot pot. 531 00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:19,920 Speaker 2: Yeah. 532 00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,040 Speaker 1: The food in Brooklyn, though, is really great, but like 533 00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:25,040 Speaker 1: Queens is Queens and Brooklyn is Brooklyn, right, and so 534 00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:28,159 Speaker 1: it is different. It might be like an overpriced fusion, 535 00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:31,040 Speaker 1: but there's also like some cute ash shit in Brooklyn. 536 00:24:31,119 --> 00:24:35,200 Speaker 1: I do love the community totally, but I just moved 537 00:24:35,200 --> 00:24:38,840 Speaker 1: to the Bronx and so I miss like Brooklyn Caribbean food. 538 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:42,800 Speaker 1: So food makes me so happy. I like understand food 539 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:43,480 Speaker 1: is the best. 540 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:44,360 Speaker 4: Mm hmm. 541 00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:45,640 Speaker 1: Oh god. 542 00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:47,920 Speaker 5: I feel like I'm an expath that just came back 543 00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:49,520 Speaker 5: to America. 544 00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:52,840 Speaker 4: After leaving Queens going to wow. Wow. 545 00:24:53,040 --> 00:24:56,119 Speaker 3: Oh my god, Queens is the most diverse place on 546 00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:59,359 Speaker 3: the planet basically, right. So what was your daily like 547 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:03,359 Speaker 3: menu weekly? Typically? What would you be eating for dinner? 548 00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,120 Speaker 2: Oh my god in Queens. 549 00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 5: I used to live up the street from Shriepa Pie, 550 00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:10,439 Speaker 5: which is a Thai restaurant that people like drive in 551 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:11,800 Speaker 5: from out of state to go to. 552 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:12,879 Speaker 1: Oh my god. 553 00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:13,879 Speaker 2: Yeah. 554 00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:17,080 Speaker 5: We would get this papaya salad with fermented crabs that 555 00:25:17,119 --> 00:25:19,240 Speaker 5: the lady would try to talk me out of ordering 556 00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:21,680 Speaker 5: every time. That's how you know when the lady tells 557 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,879 Speaker 5: you don't order that you're not gonna like it, but 558 00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:27,480 Speaker 5: it's good, or like you can't get a return. 559 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:31,000 Speaker 2: On that if you don't like it. Oh my god. Yeah. 560 00:25:31,040 --> 00:25:33,159 Speaker 5: I lived up the street from Red Ribbon Bakery. I 561 00:25:33,160 --> 00:25:35,400 Speaker 5: would get Hulla Hollow on the weekends. 562 00:25:35,560 --> 00:25:36,920 Speaker 2: It was. It was amazing. 563 00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:40,600 Speaker 5: I would walk around and I was like everybody's vagrant 564 00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:42,440 Speaker 5: idiot American nephew. 565 00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:44,640 Speaker 1: Oh I love this for you. 566 00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:47,919 Speaker 2: Everybody was like, oh, like, who is that? Whose child 567 00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:48,240 Speaker 2: is that? 568 00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:50,840 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I could smell the sitcom Let's go 569 00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:51,480 Speaker 1: Paul Feek. 570 00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:54,280 Speaker 5: And now I'm in Brooklyn and everybody's like, is that 571 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:55,800 Speaker 5: a transmasculine stand up comic? 572 00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,880 Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, everyone can see me. It's shocking. 573 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:04,000 Speaker 1: Actually, I kind of love this for you though, It's 574 00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:04,719 Speaker 1: it's a switch. 575 00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:05,800 Speaker 2: It's a switch. 576 00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:09,040 Speaker 4: What made Brooklyn so cute to you? Like why Brooklyn? 577 00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,720 Speaker 5: I just wanted to try living close to my friends. 578 00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:14,439 Speaker 5: I've lived in Queens the entire time I've lived in 579 00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:17,000 Speaker 5: New York, and I've lived in New York ten years 580 00:26:17,040 --> 00:26:22,040 Speaker 5: next month. Wow, congrats, thank you. So I was like, 581 00:26:22,119 --> 00:26:24,560 Speaker 5: what if I tried to like be near my friends. 582 00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:26,639 Speaker 4: That's heavy air quotes. 583 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,840 Speaker 5: That's been really cute, Like that aspect of my life 584 00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,639 Speaker 5: has changed completely. But I'm also just learning all this 585 00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:36,200 Speaker 5: stuff about myself. Like it sounds obvious when I say 586 00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:38,520 Speaker 5: it now, but I'm like, oh, it was actually really 587 00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:41,120 Speaker 5: important for me to like live somewhere where Asian people were. 588 00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:41,960 Speaker 5: I didn't realize that. 589 00:26:42,320 --> 00:26:46,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, culture is everything, it's real. I one hundred percent agree. 590 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:51,240 Speaker 3: There comes a time on our podcast when we transition 591 00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:51,920 Speaker 3: to questions. 592 00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:53,960 Speaker 1: Oh, my god, why do you set it up like that? 593 00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:58,040 Speaker 1: You know what, You're really bad at this. Okay, so 594 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:00,639 Speaker 1: we're going to get some questions. Ooh, so this question 595 00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:03,840 Speaker 1: is wild. Why is everyone able to stay friends with 596 00:27:03,880 --> 00:27:05,080 Speaker 1: their ex except me? 597 00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:10,720 Speaker 5: Oh gosh, that's a person needlessly comparing themselves to a 598 00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:14,680 Speaker 5: projected idea of other people. There's lots of different kinds 599 00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:17,159 Speaker 5: of people and they have lots of different relationships with 600 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:20,720 Speaker 5: lots of different exes. And I really think sometimes you 601 00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:22,399 Speaker 5: don't have to be friends with people. 602 00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 1: That's right. Because I'm from a distance period. I have 603 00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,000 Speaker 1: never been friends with an ex. They are an ex 604 00:27:29,080 --> 00:27:33,040 Speaker 1: for a reason, and that's okay. Again, take what you need. 605 00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:35,360 Speaker 1: I don't know who these people are. It's not real. Also, 606 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:37,359 Speaker 1: like sometimes people go out on a date, for like, 607 00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:39,399 Speaker 1: they go out on like two or three dates, and 608 00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:40,560 Speaker 1: they're like, oh, that's my ex. 609 00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:41,240 Speaker 2: No, it's not. 610 00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:43,840 Speaker 1: That's not an ex Steven. 611 00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:50,040 Speaker 5: I'm not friends with almost any of my exes. And 612 00:27:50,119 --> 00:27:53,280 Speaker 5: for me, like at this point of adulthood that I'm at, 613 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:56,399 Speaker 5: I'm kind of looking back and being like, oh, like, 614 00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,119 Speaker 5: maybe I should be trying harder to date people who 615 00:27:59,200 --> 00:28:00,000 Speaker 5: I could be friends with. 616 00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:01,760 Speaker 2: Maybe that's a meat problem. 617 00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:06,120 Speaker 3: Well, Nora Ephron, the Great Nora Efron once said, oh, boy, 618 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:08,680 Speaker 3: never date anybody you wouldn't want. 619 00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:11,560 Speaker 4: To break up with. Okay, it's a headspinner, But if 620 00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:12,480 Speaker 4: you think about. 621 00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:13,600 Speaker 1: It, it's giving alimony. 622 00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:17,320 Speaker 3: It's giving alimony. That's what it's giving friends in, friends out. 623 00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:18,200 Speaker 3: That's what she's saying. 624 00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:20,720 Speaker 1: Yes, ooh, what happened to you? 625 00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:23,680 Speaker 4: Norma? Ooh so much, so much? 626 00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:25,520 Speaker 1: All right, Jordan, what's the next question? 627 00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:28,159 Speaker 3: Okay, stand by, I've got it for you. And it's 628 00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:31,520 Speaker 3: kind of wild. My boyfriend is a morning person and 629 00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:33,199 Speaker 3: I am a night owl. He always wants to have 630 00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:35,280 Speaker 3: sex in the morning. I would rather do it at night. 631 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:36,960 Speaker 3: Any advice, switch off? 632 00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:39,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean do both, right. 633 00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:44,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think that's the problem. Is power control? 634 00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:44,640 Speaker 1: You think? 635 00:28:44,800 --> 00:28:46,480 Speaker 5: To me, that sounds like two people who want to 636 00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:49,560 Speaker 5: have sex with each other. And I think they should 637 00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:51,760 Speaker 5: count their blessings. Yeah, and I think they should be 638 00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:52,479 Speaker 5: so lucky. 639 00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:56,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true. What a beautiful way of looking at that, Jazz, Thank. 640 00:28:56,480 --> 00:29:00,880 Speaker 5: You, Champagne. Problems. When do we have sad in the 641 00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:02,200 Speaker 5: morning or the night? 642 00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:06,480 Speaker 2: Wow? I wish I could have a problem like that. 643 00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, whatever happened to after in delight like 644 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 3: split the difference? 645 00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:10,840 Speaker 2: People? 646 00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:13,680 Speaker 4: You know, come on, mm hmmm, this. 647 00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:18,320 Speaker 1: Question is for you because somebody found out you were 648 00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:21,400 Speaker 1: going to be on our show. Oh, I recently came 649 00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,600 Speaker 1: out as queer. I want to come out to my dad, 650 00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:26,200 Speaker 1: but I'm really nervous about doing so. Are there any 651 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:28,160 Speaker 1: thoughts on how I should approach him? 652 00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:32,200 Speaker 5: I mean, this is so funny a question when literally 653 00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:35,200 Speaker 5: earlier we were just talking about how I don't tell 654 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:36,080 Speaker 5: my family anything. 655 00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:41,480 Speaker 2: So and I mean this comes up. 656 00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:43,600 Speaker 5: You know, like people ask me this kind of stuff 657 00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:46,680 Speaker 5: a lot because I've been like out publicly as like 658 00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:50,800 Speaker 5: various different things for literally almost twenty years of my life. 659 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,200 Speaker 5: Mm hmmm, So they think I know things like this 660 00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:58,000 Speaker 5: and I don't like And that's almost kind of my 661 00:29:58,120 --> 00:30:01,560 Speaker 5: comforting answer is that I'm like, listen, like you can 662 00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:04,280 Speaker 5: do this for more than half your life, and like 663 00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:08,680 Speaker 5: still have questions and like still not know the exact 664 00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:12,160 Speaker 5: right way to approach these things with your family, right, 665 00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:15,600 Speaker 5: And I'm sort of like, you know, only you know 666 00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:20,160 Speaker 5: your relationship with your dad, right, and only you know 667 00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:23,320 Speaker 5: like the best way to talk to him about it, 668 00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:26,640 Speaker 5: And if you feel like you can trust him, you know, 669 00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:29,960 Speaker 5: with your truth. Then like that's amazing, and like I 670 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:31,800 Speaker 5: hope you can do that. I hope you can like 671 00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:33,680 Speaker 5: tell him that and share that part of your life 672 00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:34,040 Speaker 5: with him. 673 00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:38,280 Speaker 1: Also, no matter what happened, I do believe that you 674 00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:40,920 Speaker 1: will find your village, your chosen family, people that will 675 00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:45,760 Speaker 1: love you for you holy, because you are more than enough, 676 00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:50,040 Speaker 1: Like you are everything. And you know, sometimes people that 677 00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:53,520 Speaker 1: we are related to don't understand, don't see it because 678 00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:57,000 Speaker 1: maybe they're unhappy, they haven't worked on their shit, generational bullshit. 679 00:30:57,040 --> 00:31:01,240 Speaker 1: There's like a thousand reasons why somebody would not understand 680 00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:04,440 Speaker 1: or not be happy for you living your truth. But like, man, 681 00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:07,640 Speaker 1: oh man, it's harder, but so much better and sweeter 682 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:11,480 Speaker 1: and in so many other ways. So you stand in 683 00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:12,920 Speaker 1: the sun, you shine. 684 00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:16,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, Okay, we have our final question. 685 00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:18,040 Speaker 1: Hello El Jordan. 686 00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:22,520 Speaker 4: It's a scorcher. Is it okay for kids to call 687 00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:24,600 Speaker 4: adults by their first names? 688 00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:27,560 Speaker 2: Oh god, oh my god? Is it's gonna split the room? 689 00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:28,480 Speaker 2: It might? 690 00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:31,280 Speaker 1: It might because I got kids now, so am. 691 00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:33,200 Speaker 4: Might you're looking this way, you're looking out that. 692 00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:35,080 Speaker 2: I'm just like, you. 693 00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:38,720 Speaker 1: Know, because it was different before I had kids. I 694 00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:41,280 Speaker 1: feel like it's like a rich white person thing to 695 00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:46,200 Speaker 1: do to be like, you know, Peter is just like, no, 696 00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:50,200 Speaker 1: put some respect on it. But not everybody, Like my 697 00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:52,520 Speaker 1: kids do not have to. They don't have to call 698 00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:54,680 Speaker 1: everybody by their name. They don't need to know this 699 00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:58,080 Speaker 1: many adults. So the adults that they do know, they 700 00:31:58,080 --> 00:31:59,480 Speaker 1: don't even call you by your name. 701 00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:02,760 Speaker 2: That Selena's dad, Oh, Elena's dad. 702 00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:10,320 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, that is sorry. I'm dead easy, Okay, Alena's 703 00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:11,600 Speaker 1: his wife. I just fucked. 704 00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:13,640 Speaker 4: Let me find out what. 705 00:32:15,440 --> 00:32:18,800 Speaker 1: That Selena's zaddy. 706 00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:19,800 Speaker 2: Lord? 707 00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:20,960 Speaker 4: Thank you? 708 00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:25,640 Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, Psa, Jess, I'm sorry you had to hear that. 709 00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:29,680 Speaker 5: I love to learn about you. I love to see 710 00:32:29,680 --> 00:32:30,760 Speaker 5: the colors of your world. 711 00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:35,000 Speaker 4: Thank you so much. Should kids have to? 712 00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:38,280 Speaker 3: I mean, look, I grew up in the South, and 713 00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:40,560 Speaker 3: everybody was mister and miss and respect was put in 714 00:32:40,640 --> 00:32:44,680 Speaker 3: a premium because prior to that black people were disrespected. 715 00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:48,920 Speaker 3: So I have to definitely respect that and acknowledge that, 716 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:51,480 Speaker 3: and that that is a cultural thing, that that comes 717 00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:54,400 Speaker 3: from a real place. I saw people that were called 718 00:32:54,600 --> 00:32:56,640 Speaker 3: you know, I'd say, like mister deucy, and then like 719 00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:59,680 Speaker 3: some white person would be like, oh hey, Bobby, you know, 720 00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:03,160 Speaker 3: and it'd be like, you know, and to be called 721 00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:05,680 Speaker 3: boy your whole life and never to be regarded as 722 00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:07,640 Speaker 3: a man, or never to be regarded as a woman, 723 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:10,640 Speaker 3: called girl or gal or at the end of your 724 00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:13,200 Speaker 3: life you were called uncle. Maybe we should remember this 725 00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:15,760 Speaker 3: is like within one hundred years, you know, this is 726 00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:19,200 Speaker 3: like this is a lot. Of course, our country is big, 727 00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:22,160 Speaker 3: so it is a patchwork. So I think like depending 728 00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:25,280 Speaker 3: on what your community standards are given the history, Like 729 00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:28,040 Speaker 3: I know that my family in Mississippi they definitely do 730 00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,840 Speaker 3: say like mister and missus, but in the Northeast, we 731 00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:31,920 Speaker 3: don't do that as much. 732 00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:34,920 Speaker 1: Mister and missus for me is a lot, like we 733 00:33:35,360 --> 00:33:37,600 Speaker 1: don't need to do all that because I am not 734 00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:41,280 Speaker 1: from the South. And I think the kids knowing what 735 00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:44,880 Speaker 1: everybody does, like who they are, Like that is Isy's dad, 736 00:33:45,160 --> 00:33:48,400 Speaker 1: Where's is He's dad? That's your name? Yeah, they don't 737 00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:50,240 Speaker 1: need to know your name, you know what I mean, 738 00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:52,960 Speaker 1: Like they're not going half seas on an Uber Eats plan, 739 00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:55,800 Speaker 1: you know what I mean? That's Izzy's dad? Yeah, So yeah, 740 00:33:55,800 --> 00:34:00,640 Speaker 1: And then you know, because there is such a wonderfully 741 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:05,080 Speaker 1: wild queer community in my life that is also helping 742 00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:09,320 Speaker 1: me raise my kids. Michael's Auntie, but Terry's always Auntie. 743 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:11,120 Speaker 1: I think it really depends on the person. 744 00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:13,440 Speaker 3: I think there are echoes of it, you know, with 745 00:34:14,560 --> 00:34:19,239 Speaker 3: the conversation surrounding pronouns. It's like respect title. Calling people 746 00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:21,160 Speaker 3: what they feel they need to be called is a 747 00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:21,960 Speaker 3: universal thing. 748 00:34:22,160 --> 00:34:24,160 Speaker 1: Nicknames. I love me a nickname. 749 00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:28,919 Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I just think it's interesting, how yeah racialized? 750 00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:33,880 Speaker 5: That question is maybe without them meaning it. I'm Asian 751 00:34:34,120 --> 00:34:40,280 Speaker 5: if you can't tell from my whole family dynamic. But yeah, 752 00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:43,680 Speaker 5: it's interesting because like I went to private high school. 753 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:46,239 Speaker 5: We called all the teachers by their first names, and 754 00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:49,640 Speaker 5: like that was a really distinctive thing about that school. 755 00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:52,920 Speaker 5: But hearing you guys talk, and hearing you talk, Michelle, 756 00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:55,680 Speaker 5: I am like, oh, was I just a rich white 757 00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:58,680 Speaker 5: people think? I mean it was, yes, and like that's 758 00:34:58,719 --> 00:35:01,440 Speaker 5: how I learned to do. And actually I do think 759 00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:03,680 Speaker 5: I called everybody auntie and uncle growing up. 760 00:35:04,040 --> 00:35:05,600 Speaker 2: I have a lot of aunties and uncles. 761 00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:07,879 Speaker 1: I don't even know what my kids should call you now, Jordan. 762 00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:09,720 Speaker 1: But we can move on from that. So we asked 763 00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:12,439 Speaker 1: all our guests on the show, what is the most 764 00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,080 Speaker 1: adult thing you want to do for yourself that you 765 00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:16,759 Speaker 1: haven't had time to do for yourself this year. And 766 00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:18,640 Speaker 1: it really could be any motherfucking thing. 767 00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:21,480 Speaker 4: You're already doing grown level stuff. 768 00:35:21,600 --> 00:35:23,160 Speaker 2: By the way, thank you. 769 00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:25,399 Speaker 1: You gotta take your own garbage out. You gotta walk 770 00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:26,520 Speaker 1: the spider out yourself. 771 00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:27,600 Speaker 4: Thank you. 772 00:35:28,520 --> 00:35:31,520 Speaker 2: I leave spiders b I like spiders. They're they're good 773 00:35:31,520 --> 00:35:32,120 Speaker 2: for the space. 774 00:35:32,239 --> 00:35:33,399 Speaker 4: They eat bugs. Yep. 775 00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:41,239 Speaker 5: Before Okay, to prepare for this today, I listened to 776 00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,680 Speaker 5: a couple of episodes of the podcast thank You for 777 00:35:43,760 --> 00:35:46,600 Speaker 5: doing that. Oh, of course, of course, I always need 778 00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:48,879 Speaker 5: to know what kind of room I'm walking into. I 779 00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:53,400 Speaker 5: listened to the episode with Joel Kim Booster, which was 780 00:35:53,880 --> 00:35:57,400 Speaker 5: very specifically about kind of like finding your person and 781 00:35:57,480 --> 00:36:01,120 Speaker 5: like being ready for love and being ready to commit 782 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:05,160 Speaker 5: to love. And I think that's so beautiful. And I'm 783 00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:09,319 Speaker 5: in kind of an opposite mode right now. Okay, my 784 00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:13,120 Speaker 5: entire adult life, I've been in like relationship after relationship 785 00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:15,120 Speaker 5: after relationship, being. 786 00:36:14,880 --> 00:36:17,120 Speaker 2: Like is this my true love? Every time. 787 00:36:17,960 --> 00:36:20,680 Speaker 5: Now I'm actually kind of sitting with myself and being like, oh, 788 00:36:20,760 --> 00:36:23,600 Speaker 5: I wonder what it's like to actually not that I'm 789 00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:25,440 Speaker 5: necessarily planning for this, but. 790 00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:28,440 Speaker 2: Like to grow old and be single for a long time. 791 00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:31,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, gotta tell you you moved to the right borrow 792 00:36:31,520 --> 00:36:33,640 Speaker 1: for that shit. Oh my gosh, it's a very fun 793 00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:37,160 Speaker 1: burrow to explore and figure out who you are. And 794 00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:41,680 Speaker 1: I always use as tired as example of Julia Roberts 795 00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:44,439 Speaker 1: in Runaway Bride, how do you like your eggs? Because 796 00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:47,040 Speaker 1: she just kept getting married to like you're like almost 797 00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:49,239 Speaker 1: married to a bunch of guys, and she's like, I 798 00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:51,359 Speaker 1: like my eggs like this, and then she realizes that 799 00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:53,359 Speaker 1: like for the last twenty years, she's only like her 800 00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:55,080 Speaker 1: eggs away everybody else like their eggs. 801 00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:59,080 Speaker 5: That's real. I have a whole thing about like learning 802 00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:02,680 Speaker 5: exactly how my partners have liked their eggs cooked and 803 00:37:02,719 --> 00:37:04,919 Speaker 5: cooking them getting it exactly right. 804 00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:08,759 Speaker 1: Yes, yes, And so it's like, who's getting our eggs right? 805 00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:10,840 Speaker 1: And how do we like our eggs? So I can't 806 00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:13,040 Speaker 1: I can't wait to find out how you like your eggs? 807 00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:16,080 Speaker 2: Well, I might be cooking my own eggs for a while. 808 00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:22,160 Speaker 1: Thank you for coming on, Jess. 809 00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:23,480 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for having me. 810 00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:33,920 Speaker 4: How about Jess? That was that was fantastic. That was 811 00:37:33,920 --> 00:37:34,680 Speaker 4: such a good convo. 812 00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:39,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean they have a lot of power. Talking 813 00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:42,560 Speaker 1: to them is a clear case of you do what 814 00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:45,760 Speaker 1: you can do for you. You can't control other people, 815 00:37:46,160 --> 00:37:49,280 Speaker 1: like protect your peace, and if that means not talking 816 00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:52,880 Speaker 1: to somebody that you are related to, then do you, 817 00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:55,600 Speaker 1: because that's really what it is. And also, like, what 818 00:37:55,680 --> 00:38:00,400 Speaker 1: an interesting conversation. As we have more non binary in 819 00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:01,239 Speaker 1: our life. 820 00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:02,680 Speaker 2: What are our kids gonna call them? 821 00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:05,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, we can't be sucked to missus and missus an 822 00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:07,759 Speaker 1: auntie and uncle. No, I do do a gunkle. I 823 00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:08,800 Speaker 1: have a big gunkle. 824 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:10,960 Speaker 4: A gunkle. Yeah, who's the gunkle? 825 00:38:11,160 --> 00:38:11,319 Speaker 2: Oh? 826 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:12,280 Speaker 1: So many gunkles. 827 00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:15,880 Speaker 3: I think it's one of those things where the crazy 828 00:38:15,880 --> 00:38:18,640 Speaker 3: part is it's not written, so we'll have to all 829 00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:19,279 Speaker 3: figure it out. 830 00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:21,520 Speaker 1: We got to get Natasha Beddingfield to be like, the 831 00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:22,960 Speaker 1: truth is still unwritten. 832 00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:29,560 Speaker 3: Oh no, it's all yeah. 833 00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:33,239 Speaker 1: No, no, no, but something in the distance. 834 00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:36,040 Speaker 4: The rest is still unwritten. 835 00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:40,200 Speaker 1: Oh my god. Well this is why I think people 836 00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:44,040 Speaker 1: like Jess are very important, because as the world evolves, 837 00:38:44,040 --> 00:38:47,360 Speaker 1: so do we, as we should. Because if you are 838 00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:49,759 Speaker 1: a small minded, then your world is small. And isn't 839 00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:52,120 Speaker 1: it so nice just to learn something new and love 840 00:38:52,160 --> 00:38:52,880 Speaker 1: something deeper? 841 00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:56,320 Speaker 4: Look at you put these gems out on the air waves. 842 00:38:56,360 --> 00:38:56,960 Speaker 4: I love it. 843 00:38:57,040 --> 00:38:58,520 Speaker 1: This is what happens when she has a little sip 844 00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:02,880 Speaker 1: of water. She's fun. It's more important than we'll ever know. 845 00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:03,640 Speaker 4: Sure. 846 00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:06,800 Speaker 1: I remember seeing Roseanne bar Do stand up on Johnny Carson. 847 00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:11,520 Speaker 1: I'm like, WHOA, what a wild mom saying like mean 848 00:39:11,640 --> 00:39:15,000 Speaker 1: things that are really funny and true about her kids 849 00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:19,640 Speaker 1: and her life. And I'm like, this is wild and 850 00:39:20,440 --> 00:39:22,879 Speaker 1: do you know what I mean? Like it's wild? Like 851 00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,600 Speaker 1: you just someone like living their truth. I mean, didn't 852 00:39:26,600 --> 00:39:29,439 Speaker 1: hold up. But the point is when you are living 853 00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:32,879 Speaker 1: your truth, Wow, man, do you open so many other 854 00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:34,480 Speaker 1: doors for people that you don't even know. 855 00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:38,400 Speaker 3: It's a weird thing because it's like bleeding edge becomes 856 00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:42,040 Speaker 3: mainstream and the most important part is to stay open 857 00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:44,160 Speaker 3: as open as you were when you were bleeding edge. 858 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:46,719 Speaker 2: You know, I don't you lost me at bleeding. 859 00:39:46,560 --> 00:39:49,920 Speaker 3: Bleeding edge means edginess, just like if you're on the edge, 860 00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:52,360 Speaker 3: thank you. So it's like if you're avant garde and 861 00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:55,160 Speaker 3: then you become mainstream, you just need to remember those 862 00:39:55,239 --> 00:39:57,600 Speaker 3: days when you were hungry and put your arm around 863 00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:01,440 Speaker 3: it for those coming up. Because all often these days 864 00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:03,560 Speaker 3: I feel like people that make it mainstream are just 865 00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:05,600 Speaker 3: like they get crusty and I hate it. 866 00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:09,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, I h one agree bleeding Edge. When you said 867 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:10,719 Speaker 1: bleeding Edge, I was like, do I need a dificup? 868 00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:13,120 Speaker 1: You guys, thank you so much for hanging out with us. 869 00:40:14,239 --> 00:40:16,440 Speaker 1: Enjoy the rest of your day. Thank you for listening. 870 00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:20,640 Speaker 1: Definitely follow us at Adulting the Pod on Instagram and 871 00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:23,840 Speaker 1: just dm us your questions mm hm because we love 872 00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:26,879 Speaker 1: to answer them, or at least try. Okay, bitch, wash 873 00:40:26,880 --> 00:40:29,440 Speaker 1: your hands, especially under your fingernails because you're nasty. 874 00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:35,560 Speaker 4: Bye. This has been an exactly right production. 875 00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:37,640 Speaker 1: Our senior producer is g Howley. 876 00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:39,879 Speaker 2: Our associate producer is Alex Cheat. 877 00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:42,240 Speaker 1: This episode was mixed by John Bradley. 878 00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:44,080 Speaker 4: Our guest booker is Patrick Cottner. 879 00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:46,600 Speaker 1: Additional production support from Hannah Kyle Crichton. 880 00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:49,239 Speaker 4: Theme song and live show djang is by Don will. 881 00:40:49,560 --> 00:40:51,920 Speaker 1: Our live show producer is Mariann Ways. 882 00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:53,920 Speaker 4: Artwork by Jamie Bechtel. 883 00:40:53,840 --> 00:40:56,160 Speaker 1: Photography by Gus vander Most. 884 00:40:56,480 --> 00:41:00,200 Speaker 6: Executive produced by Karen Kilgera, Georgia Hartstar and Daniel Kram. 885 00:41:00,440 --> 00:41:02,880 Speaker 1: Follow the show on Instagram at Adulting Theepod. 886 00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:14,520 Speaker 6: Email your questions to Adulting Questions at gmail dot com