WEBVTT - Jim Curtis on How to Change the Beliefs That Are Running Your Life 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:03.360 Your conscious mind has logic, Your subconscious mind has happened. 0:00:03.400 --> 0:00:05.920 It's all an illusion. It's all a program that we've created. 0:00:06.000 --> 0:00:07.120 It's not necessarily true. 0:00:07.200 --> 0:00:09.680 Are we able to change our subconscious one hundred percent? 0:00:09.760 --> 0:00:13.680 Jim Curtis is a transformational coach, author, and hypnotherapist who 0:00:13.680 --> 0:00:17.520 has spent years studying how the subconscious mind shapes our reality, 0:00:17.680 --> 0:00:19.840 not just how we think, but how we heal, love, 0:00:19.920 --> 0:00:22.360 and create. He teaches that we don't manifest what we want, 0:00:22.400 --> 0:00:25.119 but we manifest what we believe our identity can achieve. 0:00:25.320 --> 0:00:26.360 It's emotion driven. 0:00:26.440 --> 0:00:28.840 Everybody has to just say one word and how they're feeling. 0:00:29.080 --> 0:00:32.839 So question everything because when we stop questioning things, and 0:00:32.880 --> 0:00:36.040 that becomes absolute truth. Questioning yourself, right, is this the 0:00:36.120 --> 0:00:39.440 right choice? As opposed to why did I make that choice? 0:00:39.520 --> 0:00:41.760 It's allowing you to control your own mind. I'm no 0:00:41.840 --> 0:00:44.840 longer a victim of it. Yeah, and instead its life 0:00:44.960 --> 0:00:47.640 is not happening to me anymore, It's happening through me. 0:00:47.880 --> 0:00:50.280 Anytime that we want to change our identity, just start 0:00:50.320 --> 0:00:52.120 to change the way that we use the word the 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:54.000 two words I am, I'm. 0:00:53.880 --> 0:00:56.400 Rady w KA and on my podcast, A really good 0:00:56.480 --> 0:01:00.360 Cry we embrace the messy and the beautiful, iding a 0:01:00.360 --> 0:01:04.559 space for raw, unfielded conversations that celebrate vulnerability and allow 0:01:04.640 --> 0:01:08.280 you to tune in to learn, connect, and find comfort together. 0:01:08.880 --> 0:01:11.319 Jim, thank you so much for being here. I'm so 0:01:11.400 --> 0:01:12.160 grateful to have you. 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:14.840 Have been following your work for a while, and I'm 0:01:14.880 --> 0:01:16.240 so excited to have this conversation with you. 0:01:16.440 --> 0:01:18.640 I've been following your videos and work for years. Have 0:01:18.840 --> 0:01:22.280 you Yes, Yes, I love everyone that you cut together, 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:23.000 and I always thought you. 0:01:23.000 --> 0:01:23.679 Were so funny. 0:01:23.720 --> 0:01:24.400 Oh, thank you. 0:01:24.520 --> 0:01:26.240 Well, hopefully we'll be able to have some sort of 0:01:26.360 --> 0:01:30.000 humor in this conversation. I wanted to start off by 0:01:30.000 --> 0:01:31.600 asking you because I know a lot of your work, 0:01:31.640 --> 0:01:32.680 if not most of it, is to do with the 0:01:32.720 --> 0:01:36.000 subconscious mind. And I think I hear that word a lot, 0:01:36.120 --> 0:01:39.000 and I think people have, I'm sure heard the term, 0:01:39.200 --> 0:01:41.560 but I'm not sure people actually know what that means, Like, 0:01:41.640 --> 0:01:43.080 what is the subconscious mind? 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:46.280 The subconscious mind is the level below your conscious mind, 0:01:46.400 --> 0:01:49.000 So some people call it the unconscious. But the school 0:01:49.040 --> 0:01:52.040 that I went to said, you're not unconscious. That's when 0:01:52.040 --> 0:01:54.840 you're sleeping, or maybe when you're sleeping, you're not even unconscious. 0:01:54.880 --> 0:01:57.680 Imagine if when we're sleeping, we're actually just going into 0:01:57.720 --> 0:01:59.440 a totally different dimension altogether. 0:01:59.680 --> 0:01:59.960 Wow. 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:03.400 So the subconscious mind is the level below your conscious mind, 0:02:03.440 --> 0:02:06.360 the autonomic nervous system. Some people even believe it's not 0:02:06.440 --> 0:02:08.280 even in your body or in your mind, it's just 0:02:08.320 --> 0:02:08.960 your energy. 0:02:09.200 --> 0:02:09.359 Right. 0:02:09.400 --> 0:02:11.840 And is it something that we have the ability to 0:02:11.880 --> 0:02:14.320 control or have any kind of control over, or is 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:17.359 it something that is beyond us We. 0:02:17.240 --> 0:02:20.080 Can control because we built it. It's a program, so 0:02:20.520 --> 0:02:23.640 we based on from zero to eight years old, when 0:02:23.639 --> 0:02:25.520 we were growing up, we'd have this emotion this is 0:02:25.600 --> 0:02:27.959 like real emotion and drop into our subconscious mind and 0:02:27.960 --> 0:02:30.960 become a belief, and then that belief creates the program 0:02:31.000 --> 0:02:33.560 that runs our conscious mind. We think that our conscious 0:02:33.600 --> 0:02:36.360 mind's in control, it's like five percent of our decision 0:02:36.440 --> 0:02:39.000 making and nine is a subconscious No. 0:02:38.960 --> 0:02:41.840 Way, And so what I know, you just mentioned a 0:02:41.840 --> 0:02:44.320 few things, But what from the moment we're born to 0:02:44.440 --> 0:02:47.720 our adulthood creates our subconscious Like, what is it that's 0:02:47.720 --> 0:02:49.320 impacting our subconscious to make. 0:02:49.280 --> 0:02:51.880 Our teachers, our parents, our older siblings? 0:02:52.240 --> 0:02:52.440 You know? 0:02:52.720 --> 0:02:55.359 You know that's what people talk about generational trauma too, 0:02:55.800 --> 0:02:59.000 that this is like the trauma from even our genes, 0:02:59.040 --> 0:03:02.639 even just goles down, or just learning from our parents 0:03:02.680 --> 0:03:04.680 when they tell us, hey, money doesn't grow on trees, 0:03:04.720 --> 0:03:06.320 and all of a sudden, we have this belief that 0:03:06.639 --> 0:03:08.320 we have to work really hard for money in that 0:03:08.400 --> 0:03:11.760 where like it's hard or not good enough. 0:03:11.760 --> 0:03:12.359 It's a big one. 0:03:12.639 --> 0:03:15.079 And so is it our automatic reaction to something? 0:03:15.120 --> 0:03:17.960 Is that how the subconscious would present itself on a 0:03:18.000 --> 0:03:20.760 daily basis, Like would how on a day to day 0:03:20.760 --> 0:03:24.280 basis when I'm walking around, how does my subconscious come out? 0:03:24.720 --> 0:03:25.359 Yeah? 0:03:25.560 --> 0:03:28.320 So it is very much so like have you ever 0:03:28.360 --> 0:03:31.040 had a reflex you drop your keys and all of 0:03:31.040 --> 0:03:34.200 a sudden you care from really quickly. That's your subconscious 0:03:34.560 --> 0:03:37.920 Your conscious mind has logic, your subconscious mind has habit. 0:03:38.760 --> 0:03:43.400 Your conscious mind has logic, and your subconscious mind has habit. Yeah, okay, 0:03:43.880 --> 0:03:45.800 And then are we able to change. 0:03:45.560 --> 0:03:47.200 Our subconscious one hundred percent? 0:03:47.480 --> 0:03:49.760 And what are some of the practices and tools that 0:03:49.800 --> 0:03:51.720 we would be able to use to be able to 0:03:51.720 --> 0:03:51.960 do that? 0:03:52.480 --> 0:03:55.800 So we've been programmed, right, All this stuff is programmed 0:03:55.840 --> 0:03:59.280 subconscious mind, and then the program runs and we start 0:03:59.280 --> 0:04:01.760 to live that we believe it's reality. 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:03.400 So just change the program. 0:04:03.440 --> 0:04:05.920 We have to recognize that it's all made up, right, 0:04:05.960 --> 0:04:09.000 It's all an illusion. It's all a program that we've created. 0:04:09.080 --> 0:04:11.440 It's not necessarily true. So we start to think that 0:04:11.440 --> 0:04:14.400 the subconscious mind is really true, like our identity. We 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:16.360 have to be this person, it has to be and 0:04:16.440 --> 0:04:18.760 my pain is real and all these things are real. 0:04:19.040 --> 0:04:21.240 So the first part to actually. 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:23.520 Changing the subconscious mind is realizing that. 0:04:23.440 --> 0:04:24.960 It's all an illusion, it's all fake. 0:04:25.520 --> 0:04:27.680 And the second part is to say, okay, what is 0:04:27.800 --> 0:04:30.400 what am I aware of? What can I be aware of? 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:31.720 And it's like, I don't really know what my. 0:04:31.680 --> 0:04:33.159 Programs are my subconscious mind. 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:35.520 We all you have to do is look at the 0:04:35.560 --> 0:04:39.000 results in your life consciously and what are you getting. 0:04:39.000 --> 0:04:41.800 Are you really good with organization? Are you really good 0:04:41.839 --> 0:04:44.279 with meeting new people? Are you really good with love? 0:04:44.400 --> 0:04:46.360 Are you really good with parenting? Are you really good 0:04:46.440 --> 0:04:48.040 or are you really bad at some of those things? 0:04:48.080 --> 0:04:49.640 And you got to see what your beliefs in your 0:04:49.640 --> 0:04:52.560 subconscious mind are. So that's awareness, and the next part 0:04:52.600 --> 0:04:55.080 is when you go in to actually change it. You 0:04:55.080 --> 0:04:57.320 can actually start to talk to yourself differently because your 0:04:57.320 --> 0:04:59.040 subconscious mind is always. 0:04:58.680 --> 0:05:03.040 Listening, right, and then you mentioned awareness. Now, I think 0:05:03.080 --> 0:05:04.960 a lot of people can go through the day me 0:05:05.040 --> 0:05:07.320 included for a lot of my life where I didn't 0:05:07.320 --> 0:05:10.920 actually know parts of myself, I didn't know what I 0:05:11.080 --> 0:05:13.080 was good at wasn't good at. I found it really 0:05:13.120 --> 0:05:15.800 difficult to become aware of who I was and you know, 0:05:15.880 --> 0:05:18.839 let alone my subconscious self or my day to day stuff. 0:05:18.880 --> 0:05:21.800 And so what are some techniques day to day that 0:05:21.920 --> 0:05:25.159 someone could be using to start at that first step 0:05:25.240 --> 0:05:27.880 of just being aware, Like, how do I become aware 0:05:27.960 --> 0:05:29.799 of my subconscious and myself? 0:05:30.000 --> 0:05:30.960 Yeah, that's interesting. 0:05:31.040 --> 0:05:36.480 It's emotion driven, So just being emotionally Like what in 0:05:36.520 --> 0:05:39.279 some of the groups that I do, everybody has to 0:05:39.360 --> 0:05:40.799 just say one word and how they're. 0:05:40.640 --> 0:05:42.279 Feeling right in the moment. 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:45.160 Yeah, and some people like I feel good, I feel great, 0:05:45.400 --> 0:05:48.560 I feel whatever. Those aren't emotions, right, So there's like 0:05:48.880 --> 0:05:51.159 four thousand emotions that we can possibly have when we 0:05:51.200 --> 0:05:53.880 start to live in these like five emotions or six 0:05:53.920 --> 0:05:57.440 emotions of I feel angry, jealous, whatever, happy, excited. 0:05:57.839 --> 0:05:59.160 There's so many more emotions. 0:05:59.200 --> 0:06:01.440 So when we come up present to how we're actually 0:06:01.440 --> 0:06:03.800 feeling and being able to express it, and we can 0:06:03.839 --> 0:06:04.880 build awareness how. 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:05.360 Did you do it? 0:06:05.960 --> 0:06:09.240 By one sitting with myself in a lot of silence, 0:06:09.320 --> 0:06:11.359 like really listening to what my mind is telling me. 0:06:11.800 --> 0:06:13.800 I had to do that a lot to you know, 0:06:13.839 --> 0:06:16.680 whenever I would ask other people to input into my life, 0:06:16.800 --> 0:06:18.479 or whenever I would ask someone else to make a 0:06:18.520 --> 0:06:20.920 decision for me, I had to really sit and think, 0:06:20.960 --> 0:06:23.200 but why am I not able to make this decision 0:06:23.200 --> 0:06:25.400 for myself? Like what is it that's stopping me from 0:06:25.760 --> 0:06:28.640 believing that I can do this myself? Believing that someone 0:06:28.640 --> 0:06:32.440 else has a stronger hold or a stronger understanding of 0:06:32.480 --> 0:06:33.039 who I am? 0:06:33.240 --> 0:06:35.840 And why do I feel that way? 0:06:35.839 --> 0:06:38.039 Because obviously there's a deeper rooted issue for me to 0:06:38.480 --> 0:06:40.920 outsource what I should be doing for myself to other people. 0:06:41.400 --> 0:06:43.000 And so I had to spend a lot of time 0:06:43.240 --> 0:06:45.200 listening to the words that I was saying to myself, 0:06:45.240 --> 0:06:48.480 because a lot of what I was outputting was based 0:06:48.520 --> 0:06:50.720 on the things I must have been telling myself for 0:06:50.760 --> 0:06:53.120 a long time that you can't make your own decisions. 0:06:53.240 --> 0:06:55.479 If you do, they're probably going to be the worst ones. 0:06:55.839 --> 0:06:57.679 Your mum knows you better than you do. Your system 0:06:57.720 --> 0:07:00.160 makes better decisions, she's smarter than you. Well, what of 0:07:00.240 --> 0:07:02.800 those things were Yeah, I didn't realize that they were 0:07:02.839 --> 0:07:05.839 playing in my mind constantly, which then meant the output 0:07:05.960 --> 0:07:08.640 or the questions I was asking or you know, if 0:07:08.640 --> 0:07:10.360 someone would ask me a question, the first thing I 0:07:10.360 --> 0:07:12.400 would do is look to my husband or my sister 0:07:12.440 --> 0:07:14.280 for them to answer it, even if it was about me. 0:07:15.000 --> 0:07:17.520 I noticed only when I saw someone who I felt 0:07:17.600 --> 0:07:20.720 was so confident and had so much self belief and 0:07:21.440 --> 0:07:23.560 help themselves. So you know when someone walks into a room, 0:07:23.560 --> 0:07:25.120 when you feel the energy and you're like, that person 0:07:25.160 --> 0:07:27.120 feels confident, not even by what they're saying, but by 0:07:27.120 --> 0:07:28.239 the energy that they're carrying. 0:07:29.080 --> 0:07:31.400 And I was like, how does someone even become like that? 0:07:31.480 --> 0:07:34.120 And I realized it's like firm faith and belief in 0:07:34.200 --> 0:07:37.880 their own powers, their own abilities, their own voice. And 0:07:37.920 --> 0:07:40.440 then I found ways to slowly strengthen. 0:07:40.000 --> 0:07:40.640 That in that way. 0:07:40.720 --> 0:07:42.600 But it's really, you know you were saying, it's a habit, 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:45.200 Like the subconscious is a habit, and for me, I 0:07:45.360 --> 0:07:47.240 find it so easy to slip back into it, even 0:07:47.280 --> 0:07:50.240 if you've created new pathways. If you get put into 0:07:50.240 --> 0:07:51.880 like a specific environment, that. 0:07:51.800 --> 0:07:53.640 The trigger that's Oh. 0:07:53.360 --> 0:07:56.040 Okay, what the thing that I heard you say? Though, 0:07:56.360 --> 0:08:00.280 is probably the most important way to change your subconscious mind, 0:08:00.560 --> 0:08:03.880 which pot what I heard you say is I started. 0:08:03.640 --> 0:08:04.320 To question it. 0:08:04.800 --> 0:08:10.040 Right, So question everything because when we stop questioning things, 0:08:10.040 --> 0:08:13.160 and that becomes absolute truth. And there is no absolute truth. 0:08:13.200 --> 0:08:15.960 Everybody has their own truth. I remember a Buddhist teacher 0:08:16.000 --> 0:08:17.560 of mine said, you know, when you look out at 0:08:17.600 --> 0:08:21.400 the Hudson River in New York City and at twilight 0:08:21.520 --> 0:08:24.400 and the sun is setting, and you can see the 0:08:24.440 --> 0:08:26.840 twinkling on the right waves in the middle, and so 0:08:26.880 --> 0:08:28.720 serene and so beautiful that you just want to get 0:08:28.720 --> 0:08:31.200 out there and touch it. Is that reality or not? 0:08:32.760 --> 0:08:36.680 And one person may say, yes, it's absolutely gorgeous, right, 0:08:36.760 --> 0:08:39.480 and another person say, when I went out, yeah, it's 0:08:39.480 --> 0:08:42.040 so gorgeous. I wanted to swim out and touch it. 0:08:42.840 --> 0:08:45.360 And it became the worst nightmare of their life. 0:08:45.440 --> 0:08:46.040 So they could. 0:08:45.880 --> 0:08:49.599 Drown the currents and they realized that it was just 0:08:49.640 --> 0:08:54.040 an illusion. There is no truth. So questioning everything like 0:08:54.080 --> 0:08:56.400 you just started with, I scided, why did I ask 0:08:56.480 --> 0:08:59.319 myself these things? Why did I act like this? And 0:09:00.040 --> 0:09:00.800 so this starts with. 0:09:00.760 --> 0:09:04.120 The question of why I wonder if Sometimes with that 0:09:04.200 --> 0:09:07.120 kind of mentality where you're constantly questioning yourself. There can 0:09:07.160 --> 0:09:10.880 be this weird thin line between where it becomes a 0:09:10.920 --> 0:09:13.520 little bit obsessive and a little bit like is this real? 0:09:13.720 --> 0:09:15.760 Is this not? Should I be believing this? Should I not? 0:09:15.920 --> 0:09:19.200 How does someone actually know what their body's telling them, 0:09:19.240 --> 0:09:21.120 what their mind's telling them, is truth or not? Like, 0:09:21.160 --> 0:09:24.520 how do you distinguish between the truth? Yeah, or reality 0:09:24.600 --> 0:09:25.240 and illusion? 0:09:25.600 --> 0:09:25.840 Yeah? 0:09:25.880 --> 0:09:29.520 That's that's a great distinction, right, because there's a difference 0:09:29.559 --> 0:09:35.120 between questioning yourself and being inquisitive. Question. So here's the 0:09:35.200 --> 0:09:37.160 distinction questioning yourself? 0:09:37.280 --> 0:09:37.480 Right? 0:09:37.640 --> 0:09:40.360 Is this the right choice? As opposed to. 0:09:40.679 --> 0:09:42.080 Why did I make that choice? 0:09:42.200 --> 0:09:42.560 Yeah? 0:09:42.600 --> 0:09:46.480 What was the impetus? As opposed to is this wrong? 0:09:47.280 --> 0:09:47.439 Right? 0:09:47.480 --> 0:09:50.360 When you have confidence in your authenticity and you say, Okay, 0:09:50.360 --> 0:09:53.920 I'm authentic, I'm confident, I make choices, it's all going 0:09:54.000 --> 0:09:55.640 to work out. Even if it doesn't work out, right, 0:09:55.720 --> 0:09:58.720 I can't do it wrong. Now, what was my driver 0:09:58.880 --> 0:10:01.000 of that? That's the question as opposed to did I 0:10:01.040 --> 0:10:02.000 make the right decision? 0:10:02.280 --> 0:10:04.160 What were some of the things that you noticed as 0:10:04.160 --> 0:10:07.400 you've gone through this journey of obviously awakening your subconscious 0:10:07.480 --> 0:10:10.400 or becoming aware of it. What were the biggest benefits 0:10:10.400 --> 0:10:11.600 that you found in your own life. 0:10:11.920 --> 0:10:13.040 So many things happen right. 0:10:13.080 --> 0:10:16.800 I didn't become a stuck identity and the stock identity says, 0:10:17.440 --> 0:10:20.760 you know, I'm a Wall Street trader. I live in 0:10:20.760 --> 0:10:23.960 New York City. You know, I have these friends in 0:10:24.000 --> 0:10:27.560 this life. And so as I started to realize that, oh, 0:10:28.440 --> 0:10:30.560 my subconscious mind can change, I don't have to be 0:10:30.640 --> 0:10:32.960 limited by that. I can have whatever I want, and 0:10:33.000 --> 0:10:35.000 I can change my identity. I don't have to be 0:10:35.960 --> 0:10:38.480 that identity all the time. And so I could be 0:10:38.600 --> 0:10:42.720 different and that's okay. And if people see me differently 0:10:42.840 --> 0:10:45.280 or like say, no, that's not you, then I can 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:49.160 be confident enough to say, is it's so true? 0:10:49.200 --> 0:10:49.319 You know? 0:10:49.360 --> 0:10:52.480 I think so many people don't change who they are 0:10:52.520 --> 0:10:56.240 because they're worried about other people perceiving the way that 0:10:56.240 --> 0:10:59.280 they're they've done a drastic change. I remember, even for 0:10:59.360 --> 0:11:01.800 me when I were I always used to think when 0:11:01.840 --> 0:11:05.040 I got into my spiritual practices and when I really 0:11:05.120 --> 0:11:07.360 changed the way that I was living, the first thoughts 0:11:07.440 --> 0:11:09.320 I had was God, I met the people I went 0:11:09.320 --> 0:11:11.559 to high school with must be high school with must 0:11:11.559 --> 0:11:13.880 be laughing at this, or they must be thinking, oh, 0:11:13.960 --> 0:11:16.800 she's can't be like this, or she must be faking it, 0:11:16.920 --> 0:11:19.560 or how did she turn from this person to this person? 0:11:19.640 --> 0:11:22.520 And so much of I wanted to hide so much 0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:25.240 of what I was changing because I was worried that 0:11:25.280 --> 0:11:27.840 I was going to be seen as someone who wasn't 0:11:27.880 --> 0:11:30.520 actually living it, or wasn't actually that is impossible for 0:11:30.559 --> 0:11:31.640 this person to have changed. 0:11:32.480 --> 0:11:33.520 I would love to hear. 0:11:33.440 --> 0:11:35.400 Your journey that you went on, and you know, you 0:11:35.440 --> 0:11:37.439 mentioned Wall Street, and I would love to hear how 0:11:37.480 --> 0:11:39.560 you went from being on Wall Street or maybe even 0:11:39.600 --> 0:11:42.240 before that, and what brought you to this path and 0:11:42.280 --> 0:11:42.920 this journey. 0:11:43.160 --> 0:11:44.760 One thing I will say before you say that is 0:11:45.200 --> 0:11:47.200 the one thing that I hear from most people that 0:11:47.240 --> 0:11:50.480 are trying to change their career is that they're afraid that. 0:11:50.600 --> 0:11:51.880 You know, people are going to say, who are you 0:11:51.920 --> 0:11:52.240 to do that? 0:11:52.559 --> 0:11:52.800 Right? 0:11:53.080 --> 0:11:53.360 Yeah? 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:53.840 Exactly. 0:11:54.080 --> 0:11:57.319 Coaches are spiritual people like who are you? What are you? 0:11:57.320 --> 0:11:58.280 You know? You the Buddha? 0:11:58.520 --> 0:11:58.960 Exactly? 0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:02.360 Yeah, the bodies once you get over that, you know, 0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:06.080 it's kind of the idea of surrender and radical acceptance. 0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:07.920 Once you get over there the mel Robbins let them 0:12:07.960 --> 0:12:08.480 of it all. 0:12:08.559 --> 0:12:09.880 Yes, yeah, then you can do it. 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:13.120 But with me, it started I was a Wall Street 0:12:13.200 --> 0:12:15.280 I was on Wall Street as a trader on the 0:12:15.320 --> 0:12:19.840 floor of the American Stock Ischine, and that was a 0:12:19.840 --> 0:12:21.720 really tough job, but that was kind of like the 0:12:21.800 --> 0:12:24.439 identity that I wanted. I wanted to be like this 0:12:24.520 --> 0:12:31.199 one trader, Yeah Street exactly. And then I just realized 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:34.480 it wasn't for me. But I stuck with it longer 0:12:34.520 --> 0:12:37.240 than I should have because my family thought that that 0:12:37.360 --> 0:12:39.920 was a great job and it was just like so 0:12:39.960 --> 0:12:41.760 I stuck with it. But then I realized, you know, 0:12:41.760 --> 0:12:43.240 I can make a change that wasn't for me, and 0:12:43.280 --> 0:12:45.840 I went to work for a company that I was 0:12:45.840 --> 0:12:49.000 trading and they were a health driven company. I remember 0:12:49.080 --> 0:12:52.000 going from the wall the floor of the stock exchange, 0:12:52.000 --> 0:12:56.920 which all guys very masculine, very macho like yelling and screaming, 0:12:56.960 --> 0:12:59.800 to being in like a loft and soho and like 0:13:00.200 --> 0:13:04.480 bean bag chairs and people taking breaks from naps have fun. 0:13:05.240 --> 0:13:06.360 That was like a great environment. 0:13:06.559 --> 0:13:08.400 It was the best. 0:13:08.400 --> 0:13:10.240 But I also thought it was kind of weak or 0:13:10.240 --> 0:13:13.960 wimpy at the time, and then I realized that was 0:13:14.520 --> 0:13:16.160 you know, you don't have to be in pain to 0:13:16.200 --> 0:13:16.960 be successful. 0:13:17.280 --> 0:13:17.839 Yeah. 0:13:17.960 --> 0:13:20.959 During this time, I had a health issue and which 0:13:23.200 --> 0:13:29.120 was progressing really rapidly, which was from an undiagnosed. 0:13:28.440 --> 0:13:29.720 Tumor on my spinal cord. 0:13:29.920 --> 0:13:30.360 Oh wow. 0:13:30.679 --> 0:13:33.080 And so it was a lesion, So we didn't know 0:13:33.120 --> 0:13:34.760 what the cause of it was. I just knew that 0:13:34.840 --> 0:13:37.040 I was getting sick and more paralyzed by the day, 0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:39.839 and so I was trying to ignore that and all 0:13:39.880 --> 0:13:42.840 the symptoms because I couldn't deal with. 0:13:42.760 --> 0:13:44.000 The pain of it. Yeah. 0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:46.240 Oddly enough, it drove me to work for more and 0:13:46.240 --> 0:13:48.840 more health companies to help, you know, build companies like 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:52.280 web and d and Everyday Health and Remedy health media 0:13:52.640 --> 0:13:53.360 and yeah. 0:13:53.520 --> 0:13:53.800 Yeah. 0:13:53.840 --> 0:13:58.839 And it wasn't until I really started to focus on 0:13:59.559 --> 0:14:02.400 myself and tell this story and I'm telling you now 0:14:02.679 --> 0:14:06.440 that I actually got some acceptance and I could become 0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:09.120 my authentic self. And when that happened, then I started 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:11.240 to take care of myself more and get better. 0:14:12.080 --> 0:14:15.840 How has that change in mindset helped you through any 0:14:15.880 --> 0:14:19.800 pain that you've had in your life physically or you know? 0:14:19.880 --> 0:14:23.760 The change in you obviously went through the whole process 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:24.760 of removing the tumor. 0:14:24.840 --> 0:14:27.880 I assume or no, it was that it couldn't It 0:14:27.920 --> 0:14:29.880 was on my spinal cords, so it couldn't be removed, 0:14:29.880 --> 0:14:31.800 so I walk with a limp now. 0:14:31.840 --> 0:14:34.760 So it's just it is. But there was a lot 0:14:34.800 --> 0:14:36.960 of pain that went with it, of course. 0:14:36.800 --> 0:14:40.920 Like extreme pain, yeah, physical pain. And that's gone now 0:14:41.560 --> 0:14:42.320 really Yeah. 0:14:42.320 --> 0:14:43.520 And the only way. 0:14:43.320 --> 0:14:45.720 That I can understand that it's gone is because I've 0:14:45.760 --> 0:14:50.600 released the emotion of it. I've released the I've accepted it. 0:14:50.600 --> 0:14:53.520 It's no longer I'm no longer a victim of it. Yeah, 0:14:53.560 --> 0:14:56.520 And instead it's life is not happening to me anymore. 0:14:56.520 --> 0:14:58.440 It's happening as me through me. 0:14:58.960 --> 0:15:01.480 It's actually so beautiful or to think that, I know, 0:15:01.520 --> 0:15:03.160 you talk about how everything ends. 0:15:03.040 --> 0:15:04.640 Up being an illusion, like most of the things that 0:15:04.640 --> 0:15:08.120 we experience in life is an illusion. And what I 0:15:08.160 --> 0:15:11.040 took from it was you have the ability to change 0:15:11.080 --> 0:15:15.680 your reality. Like everything that's happening to you or around you, 0:15:15.680 --> 0:15:18.480 you actually have the ability to shift it, to change it, 0:15:18.560 --> 0:15:19.640 to receive it differently. 0:15:20.000 --> 0:15:21.440 Yes, could you share I'm. 0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:23.320 Sure you've had lots of clients you know, that have 0:15:23.400 --> 0:15:25.360 come to you for things like this. Could you share 0:15:25.480 --> 0:15:29.040 some everyday illusions you're seeing that people get stuck in 0:15:29.240 --> 0:15:32.320 or have the belief of on a daily basis, that 0:15:32.080 --> 0:15:33.080 that stunts them. 0:15:33.200 --> 0:15:37.320 Yeah, here's a couple very I calm, transactional. Everything is 0:15:37.320 --> 0:15:41.480 based in fear. Yeah, everything is fear. Everything that we 0:15:41.600 --> 0:15:44.600 do in life is either overcoming fear in some way, 0:15:44.680 --> 0:15:47.160 Fear that we're not good enough, not capable enough, fear 0:15:47.280 --> 0:15:49.600 that you know, we're not going to have what we want, 0:15:49.640 --> 0:15:51.080 that we're not going to be more of of it. 0:15:51.080 --> 0:15:54.880 It's just based on our primal drive is fear. So 0:15:55.040 --> 0:15:57.520 everything that you do and that you're not axed, you 0:15:57.600 --> 0:16:00.720 say what am I afraid of? And when you answer 0:16:00.720 --> 0:16:03.200 the question, what am I afraid of? And then what 0:16:03.240 --> 0:16:04.640 would I do if I wasn't afraid? 0:16:05.640 --> 0:16:08.240 Then you figured it out. So most of it's around. 0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:09.920 I get a lot of people that say I'm stuck, 0:16:10.960 --> 0:16:14.160 and I was like, are you stuck? Or really, I 0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:18.160 think there's something different. Perhaps you're not stuck at all. 0:16:18.800 --> 0:16:21.720 Perhaps you're just afraid. So changing the word from I'm 0:16:21.760 --> 0:16:25.240 stuck to I'm afraid and then what because I'm stuck 0:16:25.360 --> 0:16:27.960 is ambiguous, right, you don't know how to change it? Yeah, 0:16:28.080 --> 0:16:30.680 I'm afraid. It's like, oh, I can change fear. Let's 0:16:30.680 --> 0:16:33.200 see what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of taking the 0:16:33.200 --> 0:16:35.200 step to get a divorced I'm afraid of taking the 0:16:35.240 --> 0:16:37.800 step to make a commitment to this step, to go 0:16:37.840 --> 0:16:40.040 in front of an audience and be the coach that 0:16:40.080 --> 0:16:43.040 I want to be. So there's transactional fears. 0:16:43.240 --> 0:16:46.000 The transactional fears are all to do with I call. 0:16:45.840 --> 0:16:49.760 Them transactional which are like fear of flying, fear of snakes, 0:16:49.800 --> 0:16:51.920 fear spiders, those kind of things. 0:16:52.400 --> 0:16:56.480 Yes, and I can remove those rapidly. And so there's 0:16:56.520 --> 0:16:57.200 a woman. 0:16:57.040 --> 0:17:02.560 I just at my last workshop. She was afraid of snakes. Yeah, 0:17:03.480 --> 0:17:05.280