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Speaker 1: This is John. This is your og Okay storytime podcast hosts,

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Speaker 1: and we have some rocking stories for you coming up.

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Speaker 2: But before you rock out with your socks out, I

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Speaker 2: got a quick tum minute ad break from a sponsors,

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Speaker 2: keeping the show rocking and rolling. My best friend hooked

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Speaker 2: up with my ex girlfriend before we broke up.

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Speaker 1: That's not your best friend.

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Speaker 2: I recently found out that my best friend E fed

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Speaker 2: my ex girlfriend three years although I have had my

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Speaker 2: suspicions for almost a year. But nine months ago, my

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Speaker 2: girlfriend Jenna and I broke up due to distance, we

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Speaker 2: both went away to different universities, and many issues within

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Speaker 2: the relationship. By the way, this comes from Queen Robbie,

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Speaker 2: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

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Speaker 2: to the rsash Okay stories. I'm Suburn, I'm Riley, I'm Dakota,

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Speaker 2: and I'm Keon. I know, he says, Jenna broke up

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Speaker 2: with me and I was broken. I really thought I

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Speaker 2: was gonna marry her, but I do understand why things

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Speaker 2: happened the way they did. Shortly after, we both ended

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Speaker 2: up going back to our hometown for Christmas break and

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Speaker 2: I did not know how to act around her. But

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Speaker 2: one day my best friend, John invited me over to

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Speaker 2: hang out and watch some movies.

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Speaker 1: No, it's not our John.

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Speaker 2: John and Jenna had been friends for a while too,

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Speaker 2: and he invited her as well. He asked me if

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Speaker 2: it would be okay if she came, and I reluctantly

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Speaker 2: said yes because I did not want to make things

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Speaker 2: uncomfortable within our circle of friends. But when we all

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Speaker 2: got there, I noticed they were being very touchy and

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Speaker 2: obviously flirty. I was super uncomfortable as it had been

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Speaker 2: only two weeks since we broke up. I left and

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Speaker 2: started to become very suspicious. All my friends said I

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Speaker 2: had nothing to worry about, as John or Jenna would

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Speaker 2: never do something like that to me.

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Speaker 1: Never.

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Speaker 2: Jenna used to have this old Tumblr page that she

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Speaker 2: would write poetry on and had a bunch of writings

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Speaker 2: about our relationship. She only wrote about romance based on

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Speaker 2: real experiences that she had. Only me and her knew

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Speaker 2: about it. One night, I was a few bottles of

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Speaker 2: wine down.

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Speaker 1: A few bottles of wine, my god, like the.

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Speaker 2: Ones on the airplane, no no way they could go,

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Speaker 2: and filling nostalgic. So I decided to go and check

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Speaker 2: the tumbler page in order to mope while reading poetry

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Speaker 2: about things when things were good between us. I had

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Speaker 2: believed she hadn't uploaded in almost a year at this point,

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Speaker 2: but I was surprised to see there was a new post,

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Speaker 2: a whole new poem entitled Can't Stop Thinking about You.

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Speaker 3: Wow, how original.

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Speaker 2: Started to freak out. There was no specific mention of John,

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Speaker 2: but I could just tell it was about him and

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Speaker 2: her hooking up and how romantic it was. As previously mentioned,

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Speaker 2: I was wasted and therefore had no idea what to do.

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Speaker 2: I was shaking non stop and texted John at two

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Speaker 2: in the morning. He assured me that nothing had happened.

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Speaker 2: Ann was even willing to meet up the next morning,

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Speaker 2: so we did. In the morning, John picked me up

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Speaker 2: and we went for coffee, and I confronted him. He

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Speaker 2: held my hands and said, I promise I would never

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Speaker 2: do anything like that to you, Never would, never will.

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Speaker 2: So I believed it, and I gave him the benefit

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Speaker 2: of the doubt. I just assumed she hooked up with

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Speaker 2: some dude and that was that. I then asked Jenna

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Speaker 2: and she said the same thing, that it didn't happen,

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Speaker 2: and that I'm just paranoid for the next couple of months,

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Speaker 2: I was still paranoid, but I was giving them the

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Speaker 2: benefit of the doubt. They could not do that to me.

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Speaker 2: It was impossible. I would see them together and even

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Speaker 2: would hang out with the both of them. I invited

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Speaker 2: them over for the super Bowl and would constantly see

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Speaker 2: them when I go back and visit my hometown. Fast

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Speaker 2: forward nine months and my friend Chris came up to

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Speaker 2: see me. Her and Jenna are very close and it

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Speaker 2: seemed as though she knew something. I was not going

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Speaker 2: to pry, as I thought ignorance was bliss in the situation.

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Speaker 1: But we got wasted.

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Speaker 2: One night and I just straight up asked and lo

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Speaker 2: and behold, I was right all along.

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Speaker 1: So we can just be like, oh, that's new information,

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Speaker 1: never talking to these people again and moving on with

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Speaker 1: my life.

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Speaker 2: Okay, yes, but everyone's different, and I feel like everyone

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Speaker 2: needs their own sense of closure so they can close

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Speaker 2: that chapter of their life in that poem and move

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Speaker 2: on and write new one.

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Speaker 1: Vengeance, I'm vengeance.

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Speaker 2: I think that we need to I don't know, maybe

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Speaker 2: confront Jenna and John. Anyways, it'll be fun your closure

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Speaker 2: and move on. So Jenna told Chris that John and

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Speaker 2: Jenna did f and have been kind of a thing

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Speaker 2: ever since. What's even worse is that John has a

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Speaker 2: girlfriend too, who I'm very good friends with. I am

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Speaker 2: so beyond her, and I feel so betrayed. The issue

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Speaker 2: does not lie and the fact that she hooked up

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Speaker 2: with someone. It's the fact that it was with John

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Speaker 2: and that they were so willing to lie and never

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Speaker 2: tell if it wasn't for Chris telling me. I didn't

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Speaker 2: know what to do, but I do know that I

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Speaker 2: plan on confronting them both. I still am in love

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Speaker 2: with her, and I just feel so effing nom. I

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Speaker 2: don't know what to believe anymore, and I just need

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Speaker 2: try and figure out how to move on. Thank you

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Speaker 2: all so much. We got some comments on how to

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Speaker 2: move on?

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Speaker 3: Guys.

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Speaker 2: How we moving on? How we doing it? I mean

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Speaker 2: for vengeance?

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Speaker 1: No, it's not that. Well, clearly, if you're friends with

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Speaker 1: somebody and you know they're being cheated on, you should tell.

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Speaker 1: You should put that out there. Yeah, and do it

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Speaker 1: in a way where it's like this is you know,

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Speaker 1: I mean, try not to do it in a way

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Speaker 1: with like hate in your heart or whatever. It's gonna

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Speaker 1: be hard, but they deserve to know because it is

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Speaker 1: your business because you're directly affected by it.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, and then just try to new life.

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Speaker 1: New life now you don't even have to have them

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Speaker 1: in it in any way.

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Speaker 2: Nope, new life. But I think you know this guy's

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Speaker 2: in college is probably his first horrible cheating breakup. It's

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Speaker 2: gonna take a little bit of time to figure out

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Speaker 2: how to closure it. You might need to write a

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Speaker 2: song about it. Also, we have a comment. So wow,

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Speaker 2: you gave so much space in your mind to your

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Speaker 2: ex girlfriend nine months being paranoid and suspicious when you

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Speaker 2: could have just walked away and spent the time healing.

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Speaker 2: Move on. Yes, the portrayal hurts, but so what. Ain't

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Speaker 2: nothing you can't do about it except cut them both off,

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Speaker 2: move on and start healing. Paid them no mind. This

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Speaker 2: shows he has no respect for you and he takes

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Speaker 2: you for the Granted, this falls under the category of cheating,

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Speaker 2: and if the cheating is no breaker thing for you,

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Speaker 2: then you know the answer. He will not stop pursuing her,

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Speaker 2: but he will get smart and hiding things from you

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Speaker 2: unless you catch him so he can deny that nothing happened.

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Speaker 2: Put your foot down and end things with him over

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Speaker 2: this to stop to save your respect for him. We

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Speaker 2: have an update. I think Op is gonna call him,

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Speaker 2: maybe cower away from actually doing anything about it.

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Speaker 1: You feel me, I mean, I feel like you gotta

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Speaker 1: at least let your friend know they're being cheated on. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: schmeet it on. Hey, that word just rhymed. Guys, I'm sorry,

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Speaker 1: it's how my brain works.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, have you ever been cheated on? Not to my knowledge,

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Speaker 2: have you ever been cheated on?

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Speaker 4: Kean hmmm, I've had some pretty traumatic stuff happened to me,

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Speaker 4: but not to start my knowledge, my first serious girlfriend

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Speaker 4: in high school broke up with me after she went

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Speaker 4: to my prom, and then I didn't get to go

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Speaker 4: to her prom, so I spent money on another suit

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Speaker 4: for that or like something. And then I went to

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Speaker 4: the after party and I saw her hooking up with

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Speaker 4: somebody from my class, and she said, you shouldn't be here,

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Speaker 4: and she's like, I hope you focus on yourself.

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Speaker 2: Had you move on from that?

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Speaker 4: I got hot? Wait, I've always been hot. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: He got a fat bingo.

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Speaker 2: So we got an update. So I finally confronted both

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Speaker 2: John and Jenna. I called John on the phone since

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Speaker 2: we could not meet in person, and it went exactly

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Speaker 2: how I thought it was gonna go. He told me

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Speaker 2: he was never going to tell me and that he

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Speaker 2: does not regret lying because I gotta have a good year.

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Speaker 2: I told that either he's going to tell his girlfriend

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Speaker 2: or I will. Then he hung up and haven't spoken since.

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Speaker 2: He blocks me on everything. Immediately after we hung up,

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Speaker 2: next was dealing with Jenna, but it also went exactly

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Speaker 2: how I thought it was gonna go. Jenna was trying

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Speaker 2: to bait me with I'm so awful and I deserve

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Speaker 2: all the hate, but I wasn't gonna play into her

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Speaker 2: game of trying to make her feel better. I said

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Speaker 2: my piece and then it was done. We have not

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Speaker 2: spoken since. Later tonight, John's X came over to my

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Speaker 2: place and we talked everything out. I told her some

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Speaker 2: things that John left out when he told her and

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Speaker 2: made it much harder for her, but she needed to

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Speaker 2: hear everything. I think they're broken up, and he also

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Speaker 2: blocked her on everything right after. He told me goes

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Speaker 2: to show what kind of people we had in our lives.

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Speaker 1: Ah God Lee, Yeah, I would have been so triggered

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Speaker 1: by the I deserve all the hate. I'd be like, oh,

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Speaker 1: so you're seeing anything it's clearly now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so sucky that you're cheating on someone for

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Speaker 2: a whole year. I think OPI moved fast on this

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Speaker 2: and was really quick to tell her. You know, also,

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Speaker 2: was Jenny okay with John still having a girlfriend?

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Speaker 1: Like what the heck?

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Speaker 3: Who you were also friends with?

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Speaker 1: Like of course you deserve all the hate, Like why

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Speaker 1: are you even saying that? Like do you think I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna go?

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Speaker 3: No? Yeah you do. Now shut up.

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Speaker 1: Let me tell you what I think, and I'm gonna leave.

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Speaker 1: Then you can be like oh all day long.

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Speaker 3: I don't care.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is so so weird and I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I'm a fan. So a day after I confronted John

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Speaker 2: and Jenna, Jenna's mom messaged me. She and I always

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Speaker 2: had very good friendships during Jenna and I's relationship. She

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Speaker 2: messaged me originally trying to understand what was going on

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Speaker 2: and why everyone was being so mean to Jenna. I

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Speaker 2: didn't tell her the situation, but explain how there were

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Speaker 2: many many lies that happened and that everyone involved wanted

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Speaker 2: to just move forward without her. I think we should

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Speaker 2: tell her what the truth is.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, No, the truth is very necessary here.

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Speaker 2: Oh well, it continues, but she didn't like that at all.

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Speaker 2: She started saying it was my fault that everyone was

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Speaker 2: upset with Jenna and started making claims about how Jenna

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Speaker 2: wasn't in the wrong at all. So I decided that

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Speaker 2: I should just explain what happened and why everyone was

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Speaker 2: so dumb with Jenna. During this argument between Jenna's mom

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Speaker 2: and me, Jenna's mom mentioned, how could it have been

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Speaker 2: two weeks after your breakup if you broke up in October,

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Speaker 2: which hit even harder because Jenna and I did break

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Speaker 2: up in October for less than twelve hours, but she

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Speaker 2: I never told her mom we got back together. So

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Speaker 2: once again another line, Well, guys, any other thoughts before

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Speaker 2: we finish up here.

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Speaker 1: I'd take it like, in these situations, it's like you

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Speaker 1: just got to like put the truth out there and

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Speaker 1: then just be like, and y'all can do with that

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Speaker 1: whatever you want.

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Speaker 3: You want to accept it, you want to think it's

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Speaker 3: a lie.

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna waste all of this emotional energy trying

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Speaker 1: to convince you what I know is true is true.

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Speaker 1: I already told you go ahead.

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Speaker 2: I agree, So we're gonna finish this out. I told

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Speaker 2: Jenna's mom that we actually broke up at the end

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Speaker 2: of November and that Jenna is still obviously lying to you.

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Speaker 2: I said, I truly think Jenna is not telling you

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Speaker 2: the truth about everything, but that is a conversation that

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Speaker 2: is for her and you, not with me, and then

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Speaker 2: we stopped talking after that. I'm just ready to move on.

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Speaker 2: I've had this weighing on me since last December, and

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Speaker 2: I'm finally free of worrying and being paranoid. I have

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Speaker 2: people in my life that actually care, and that's all

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Speaker 2: I can really ask for. I read all the replies

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Speaker 2: on the last posts, and I just want to say

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Speaker 2: thank you for all the advice and comments and concerns.

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Speaker 2: It means a lot.

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Speaker 1: I broke up with my boyfriend because he stopped doing

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Speaker 1: the little thing?

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Speaker 5: Was he doing the big things?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 1: He twenty one male and I twenty female, have been

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Speaker 1: together since junior year of high school. Dang, and we

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Speaker 1: have lived together at his childhood home with his mother

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Speaker 1: and siblings for.

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Speaker 3: The past two years.

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Speaker 1: Yikes. Overall, our relationship is pretty harmonious. When I talk

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Speaker 1: to other people about their significant others, I'm usually thanking

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Speaker 1: my lucky stars for the guy I've got because we're

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Speaker 1: compatible in so many ways and we rarely fight.

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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from.

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Speaker 1: User go ask Absalom, and if you want to submit

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00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:41,319
Speaker 1: your own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime

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00:11:41,360 --> 00:11:45,240
Speaker 1: suburt it. I'm Dakota, I'm Sophia, and I'm Keon. We'll

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Speaker 1: see what old he has to say. We all contribute

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Speaker 1: equally to running the house, which means I'm deeply involved

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Speaker 1: in his dynamic. I'm always willing to help around the

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Speaker 1: house and contribute positively to everyone's needs, especially my boyfriends.

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Speaker 1: I'm a people pleaser in all dimensions of my life,

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Speaker 1: including our relationship. My boyfriend is not. I often joke

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Speaker 1: that he must have some form of oppositional defiant disorder.

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Speaker 1: I know this isn't a joke for those with actual diagnoses,

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Speaker 1: Please don't take offense too late. They're offended because it

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Speaker 1: feels like the majority of non essential requests I make

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Speaker 1: receive flat nose in response. Basic things like borrowing his

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Speaker 1: laptop or asking him to pick something up on his

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00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:27,800
Speaker 1: way home aren't the issue. But when I ask about

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Speaker 1: girly stuff for lack of a better description, like going

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Speaker 1: on double dates with my friends or seeing my family

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Speaker 1: what he utterly shuts down without explanation. I'm never graced

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Speaker 1: with details like I don't want to hang out with

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Speaker 1: so and so because she annoys me, or your uncle's

280
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Speaker 1: jokes aren't funny. He just straight up shuts down and

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Speaker 1: says something like nah, I'm all set, not gonna happen,

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Speaker 1: or a flat out in no way.

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Speaker 3: Here's the most recent examples.

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Speaker 1: My family through a graduation party for me for college

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Speaker 1: and my twin cousins for high school. Since my boyfriend

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00:12:57,880 --> 00:13:00,360
Speaker 1: also graduated from college this year, my mom wanted to

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00:13:00,360 --> 00:13:03,360
Speaker 1: celebrate his achievements as well. She even painted his name

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00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:07,520
Speaker 1: on the beautiful congratulations banner alongside mine and my cousins,

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Speaker 1: and he was included in the shower of cards and

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00:13:09,800 --> 00:13:12,800
Speaker 1: gifts from aunts and uncles. My family has accepted him

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Speaker 1: as one of us in the warmest way possible, and

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Speaker 1: my mother lovingly refers to him as her son. This

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Speaker 1: would have been fantastic if my boyfriend had been willing

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Speaker 1: to attend. I gave him several weeks notice, even a

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Speaker 1: three day countdown. He refused to attend and wouldn't justify

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Speaker 1: or give any valid reasons why other than the non

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Speaker 1: obligatory plans he made the same day for the sole

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Speaker 1: purpose of avoiding the party.

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Speaker 2: Like, I'm going to the DMV.

300
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Speaker 1: Like it's like, when did you make those plans?

301
00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:41,880
Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: Last week?

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Speaker 2: But I gotta go.

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Speaker 1: Bro. He's like, no, I'm just walking. I'm doing a

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Speaker 1: walking and I just decided to walk.

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Speaker 5: And she's like, you've never had a daily walk before.

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Speaker 5: He's like, you gotta start sometime.

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Speaker 1: I gotta start sometime, gotta start. I mean, it sounds

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Speaker 1: like the guys for sure got some kind of like

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Speaker 1: aversion to avoidance. Yeah, he just wants to not be

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Speaker 1: having any emotions or it's just.

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Speaker 5: Weird behavior for a person that you've been in a

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Speaker 5: relationship with for six years.

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Speaker 1: Yeah at this point, Yeah.

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Speaker 5: About six years. And he doesn't want to see your

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Speaker 5: family or your friends.

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Speaker 1: That's kind of just like if you don't see the

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00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:23,040
Speaker 1: issue with that boyfriend, then that's the issue in and

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Speaker 1: of itself.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I was at a loss for how to deal with

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Speaker 1: this besides attempting verbal communication. When I got home, I

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00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:32,720
Speaker 1: showed him the banner, I gave him the cards. I

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Speaker 1: mentioned that my friends a couple who will come into

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Speaker 1: the story again soon even brought his favorite drinks to

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Speaker 1: share because I'd mentioned it to them before. I told

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Speaker 1: him how much everyone missed him and how awkward it

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Speaker 1: was for me to continually make excuses for why he

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Speaker 1: didn't come to a party thrown partially in his honor.

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Speaker 1: In return, I got a half bootied apology and the

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Speaker 1: subject was changed. I remained defeated because I didn't throw

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Speaker 1: the pathetic crying fit brewing in my head. Those never

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00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:02,160
Speaker 1: get anyone anywhere. Fast forward to today, the same couple

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00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:05,240
Speaker 1: I've hung out with. Both of them talked positively about

335
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Speaker 1: my boyfriend, and they've been just itching to meet him.

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00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:12,200
Speaker 1: Suggested a double date for tomorrow night. I asked my boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: and his answer was, I'm willing to go out with you,

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Speaker 1: but I don't want to see anyone else.

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Speaker 3: Mind you.

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Speaker 1: He hasn't even met these people, and I've never had

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Speaker 1: the chance to tell him much about them. We see

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Speaker 1: each other every single day, so it isn't like he

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00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:28,240
Speaker 1: misses me or we're lacking alone time. I tried several

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Speaker 1: different angles to convince him it could be fun. We've

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Speaker 1: never been to the drive in before. This cool movie's

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Speaker 1: playing it's only six bucks. We can schmick in the cards.

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Speaker 5: We have to bribe your partner to meet your friends.

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Speaker 1: And this is what you will learn when you stop

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Speaker 1: dating the guy you've been with since junior year.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, and who hasn't grown since junior year.

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Speaker 1: And is basically acting like I don't know, he would

352
00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:55,560
Speaker 1: like to pretend you're not in a relationship in every

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Speaker 1: aspect of his life outside of the time he spends

354
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Speaker 1: with you directly.

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Speaker 3: Jane and John are like such cool people.

356
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Speaker 1: I think you'd get along great, Brickwall, I'm all set

357
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Speaker 1: with that.

358
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Speaker 3: Just stop stop.

359
00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:10,880
Speaker 1: I'm not going no explanation or justification, no flexibility for

360
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:14,360
Speaker 1: different plans, a different night, or any compromise whatsoever. My

361
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:17,680
Speaker 1: boyfriend is not, never has been, and never will be

362
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Speaker 1: a quote unquote whipped guy, and that's the last thing

363
00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:25,800
Speaker 1: I'd want from a relationship. We lead independent, productive lives

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Speaker 1: with separate jobs, friends, and school.

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Speaker 3: This has worked for almost five years now.

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Speaker 1: As it though, no I rarely ask for our friend

367
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:38,040
Speaker 1: groups to cross, precisely because I know this is the result.

368
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:41,040
Speaker 1: I'll occasionally tag along on adventures with his buddies, and

369
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:43,200
Speaker 1: I ultimately see more of his friends at our house

370
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:45,560
Speaker 1: than my own group, because he invites them over to

371
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:48,000
Speaker 1: work on cars and bikes in our garage. But if

372
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:50,480
Speaker 1: I try to reverse the situation and invite him out

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Speaker 1: with my friends. In co Ed's situations, I'm not asking

374
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,200
Speaker 1: us to join him from Manny Petties at the mall.

375
00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:58,320
Speaker 1: He refuses to participate. If I have my friends over,

376
00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:00,960
Speaker 1: he busies himself with anything but what we are doing.

377
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:04,360
Speaker 1: The same system applies to family. If he's seeing relatives

378
00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:07,280
Speaker 1: or having dinner with his parents, I'm almost always involved

379
00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:09,479
Speaker 1: and welcomed. If I'm doing the same with my family,

380
00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:12,320
Speaker 1: it's like pulling teeth to get him to participate. How

381
00:17:12,320 --> 00:17:14,600
Speaker 1: do I effectively tell him that he's being a complete

382
00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:18,199
Speaker 1: wiener without sounding like just another typical whiny girlfriend And

383
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:20,760
Speaker 1: there are relevant comments? Girl, I don't think you're at

384
00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:22,720
Speaker 1: that point. I think you're at the point of we

385
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:23,960
Speaker 1: should go our separate ways.

386
00:17:24,359 --> 00:17:27,000
Speaker 5: Yes, I think he's a lost CAUZ leave him.

387
00:17:27,119 --> 00:17:30,000
Speaker 7: You've been with ever six years. He's your high school boyfriend.

388
00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:33,600
Speaker 7: You guys have our different people. Yeah, you've grown apart,

389
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,720
Speaker 7: you've matured. He is not not everyone out there is

390
00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:37,560
Speaker 7: like this.

391
00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:39,120
Speaker 3: No, if this is not like us.

392
00:17:39,119 --> 00:17:39,840
Speaker 1: It's not normal.

393
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:42,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not not even close to normal.

394
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:44,720
Speaker 7: And he's convinced her that this is some type of

395
00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:45,920
Speaker 7: like gurly.

396
00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:50,159
Speaker 8: Yeah, hipped that Like, No, no, if your partner is

397
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:54,240
Speaker 8: using terms like that's gurly or oh, you're just trying

398
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:57,119
Speaker 8: to like, you know, dominate me in this relationship.

399
00:17:57,119 --> 00:18:00,440
Speaker 1: But I'm a man, Like no, Yeah, he's isolated you

400
00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 1: like in a way. Yes, Zech, he's just like slowly

401
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:05,719
Speaker 1: trying to make you like just pick him over all

402
00:18:05,760 --> 00:18:08,960
Speaker 1: of your friends and all of your family, and you

403
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,000
Speaker 1: know it's not gonna get any better as time goes on.

404
00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:14,880
Speaker 1: We've got relevant comments the Birds. The Birds says, this

405
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:17,280
Speaker 1: sounds awful. I hate to be the person who jumps

406
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:19,280
Speaker 1: to break up, but he really doesn't seem like he's

407
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:21,920
Speaker 1: considerate of you or your feelings at all in terms

408
00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:24,840
Speaker 1: of integrating himself into your life outside of his own.

409
00:18:25,080 --> 00:18:27,320
Speaker 1: He knows these things are important to you, and yet

410
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:30,159
Speaker 1: he doesn't budge an inch. I think you need to

411
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:32,560
Speaker 1: have a serious combo about this. Does he have social

412
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:34,840
Speaker 1: anxiety or is it just that he doesn't feel like

413
00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:36,800
Speaker 1: going Maybe you can get to the bottom of this

414
00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,600
Speaker 1: and have a compromise. Though it doesn't seem hopeful if

415
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:42,160
Speaker 1: you have to drag him tooth and nail to participate

416
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,679
Speaker 1: in these things. Perhaps, though he doesn't quite see the

417
00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:47,399
Speaker 1: severity of the issue yet. Can you imagine a future

418
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:50,280
Speaker 1: with someone who won't ever integrate your lives fully? OHP

419
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,440
Speaker 1: says on the grand scheme of our relationship. I don't

420
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,120
Speaker 1: think this is enough for me to break it off,

421
00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,640
Speaker 1: at least not yet. There have been times when he's

422
00:18:57,640 --> 00:18:59,680
Speaker 1: come along on these kinds of outings and he was

423
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,920
Speaker 1: fond after the initial teeth pulling to get him going.

424
00:19:03,119 --> 00:19:05,440
Speaker 1: I don't think it's a social anxiety thing, because I'm

425
00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:07,960
Speaker 1: quite certain it's him saying to himself, I could sit

426
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,840
Speaker 1: through a movie with these people I don't know, or

427
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,560
Speaker 1: I could go do x fun thing with my buddies instead.

428
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:15,720
Speaker 1: I'm already fully aware that he's selfish in this way,

429
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:19,360
Speaker 1: and this is the most detrimental manifestation of his selfishness

430
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,080
Speaker 1: in our relationship. Oh so there's others.

431
00:19:21,359 --> 00:19:22,119
Speaker 3: In many other.

432
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,720
Speaker 1: Areas he does put me first and considers my feelings,

433
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:26,280
Speaker 1: and this doesn't go unseen for me.

434
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:28,320
Speaker 3: I appreciate the crap out of what he does.

435
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:31,480
Speaker 1: Right, Maybe that's why this sticks out as so god

436
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:34,400
Speaker 1: awful and painful, because it really is my only consistent

437
00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:38,160
Speaker 1: complaint regarding your last point, that really is the scary part.

438
00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:40,480
Speaker 1: I don't think I can, and I know better than

439
00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:43,919
Speaker 1: to demand change. When OPI was asked about the banner

440
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:47,439
Speaker 1: and told she is being submissive, Opie says, yeah, my

441
00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:49,359
Speaker 1: mom hung it up for the whole party to see.

442
00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:51,840
Speaker 1: I was tempted to take the section with his name down,

443
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,760
Speaker 1: but it was too late. Listen to yourself there. I

444
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:58,360
Speaker 1: don't want this post to reflect too poorly on our relationship, because,

445
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,040
Speaker 1: as I've mentioned in other comments, we're not entirely broken.

446
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,760
Speaker 1: Past issues between us that I've addressed have been taken

447
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:07,040
Speaker 1: care of head on, and he does contribute positive effort

448
00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:09,720
Speaker 1: to the relationship in other areas. Find a new bang,

449
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:13,400
Speaker 1: just not this one as of late. I just need more.

450
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,200
Speaker 1: Where's the positivity?

451
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:18,200
Speaker 5: Yeah, if you can't name the positivity, I'm not gonna

452
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:19,280
Speaker 5: believe there is any.

453
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:23,240
Speaker 1: If your assessment of my submissive role is correct, what's

454
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,679
Speaker 1: your advice for addressing it? I want to assert to

455
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:28,159
Speaker 1: you that I'm not a complete doormat with him. I

456
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,000
Speaker 1: dang near moved out and left him last summer because

457
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,360
Speaker 1: of a lack of action on a totally different issue.

458
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,280
Speaker 1: And when he realized I was serious, he made the

459
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:37,400
Speaker 1: changes that needed to be made. And we haven't really

460
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:39,960
Speaker 1: thought about much until this point. And when I say

461
00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:42,760
Speaker 1: we haven't really fought, I mean we haven't fought because

462
00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:45,440
Speaker 1: there wasn't anything to fight about. I wasn't just sweeping

463
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:47,439
Speaker 1: things under the rug for the sake of harmony. We

464
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:49,720
Speaker 1: have been having a very harmonious year since.

465
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:50,439
Speaker 3: The last shake up.

466
00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:53,720
Speaker 1: But realistically, I can't just throw around ultimatoms and pack

467
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:56,440
Speaker 1: my bags every six months when I don't get my way.

468
00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:59,480
Speaker 1: So how do I shake him back to reality without

469
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:01,040
Speaker 1: getting over the dramatic breakup?

470
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:02,200
Speaker 3: I have a theory here.

471
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:03,080
Speaker 2: This is a breakup.

472
00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:06,480
Speaker 3: It sounds like you went through a near breakup.

473
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:09,120
Speaker 1: Recently, Yes, And I bet you you know, I don't

474
00:21:09,119 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 1: know how he was with your friends before, but I

475
00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:13,679
Speaker 1: bet you if your friends were on your side and

476
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,960
Speaker 1: your family was on your side, he might be taking

477
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,560
Speaker 1: that like personally and holding a grudge about it. But

478
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:23,119
Speaker 1: he's never met them, you know. Yeah, but now this

479
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,640
Speaker 1: is like the seeing them. Oh well, I wouldn't meet

480
00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:28,160
Speaker 1: them because it's disrespectful for them to have talked down

481
00:21:28,200 --> 00:21:31,160
Speaker 1: about me. M yeah, and it's like, dude, get over yourself.

482
00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:35,040
Speaker 5: Really, regardless of what the reason is, I think you

483
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:36,200
Speaker 5: should break up with them.

484
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:36,480
Speaker 1: Yeah.

485
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:38,840
Speaker 3: No, that's still like a stinky little that's not it.

486
00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 3: That doesn't justify anything.

487
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:43,080
Speaker 1: It's just more like, oh, maybe that's where this why

488
00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:48,440
Speaker 1: crazy like resistance to being around these people is coming from. Agreed,

489
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:52,000
Speaker 1: But uh, you know there's an update six days later.

490
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:53,360
Speaker 3: I hope it's a breakup.

491
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:57,439
Speaker 1: I hope. So I just wanted to thank everyone who

492
00:21:57,520 --> 00:22:00,240
Speaker 1: took the time to respond and offered their advice. After

493
00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:03,000
Speaker 1: a long talk, the result was to break up because

494
00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:05,400
Speaker 1: he doesn't feel the same way about me anymore.

495
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 3: Yay.

496
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,439
Speaker 1: But slowly, over time you will change the meaning of

497
00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:13,719
Speaker 1: that to the breakup was I realized.

498
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,320
Speaker 3: He was a loser.

499
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:19,440
Speaker 1: Yeah. I'm heartbroken, but my brain understands and accepts his reasons.

500
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:22,479
Speaker 1: I don't feel like writing the entire saga out. I

501
00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:25,000
Speaker 1: just wanted to offer an update and thank everyone who

502
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:26,280
Speaker 1: was kind enough to try and help.

503
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,880
Speaker 3: And we have some final comments.

504
00:22:28,040 --> 00:22:30,679
Speaker 1: Ashtrick says, I'm sorry if I sprinkled out on you,

505
00:22:30,760 --> 00:22:33,520
Speaker 1: but him saying that this is he's breaking up because

506
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,840
Speaker 1: he doesn't have feelings for you the same way anymore.

507
00:22:36,119 --> 00:22:39,320
Speaker 1: Is as much a cop out as his previous no explanations.

508
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:41,199
Speaker 1: He was never willing to go to these events with you,

509
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:44,160
Speaker 1: so it's not a result of a change in how

510
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:45,000
Speaker 1: he felt about you.

511
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:47,600
Speaker 3: So either he never felt that way about you.

512
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:50,720
Speaker 1: Or he was so loath to explore or explain the

513
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:55,000
Speaker 1: issue that he saw breaking up as the easiest way out. Interesting.

514
00:22:55,480 --> 00:23:00,920
Speaker 1: Consider this a bullet dodged agreed agreed. A user says,

515
00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:04,200
Speaker 1: hopefully we'll still be friends. I don't understand. To him,

516
00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:07,080
Speaker 1: you were nothing more than a walking, talking, spicy sleep

517
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:10,160
Speaker 1: toy that paid half the bills for a long time.

518
00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 1: He was with you until you started getting upset at

519
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:15,520
Speaker 1: his horrendous neglect. Then when you stopped being a prop

520
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:18,360
Speaker 1: by talking about how he made you feel, he decided

521
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:20,800
Speaker 1: to finally tell you that he'd lost interest in you.

522
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:23,720
Speaker 3: Your ex is a stinky doodoo boy.

523
00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:28,200
Speaker 1: I agree. Yes, I refuse to take my cheating X back,

524
00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:32,600
Speaker 1: but my brother wants me to. You have no authority here.

525
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,639
Speaker 1: Hey everyone, I'm really trying to make sense of this

526
00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:40,200
Speaker 1: absolute movie I've been thrown in for context. I'm twenty

527
00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:42,840
Speaker 1: and I was dating my ex boyfriend twenty one for

528
00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:47,080
Speaker 1: two years. My ex is my brother's best friend from childhood,

529
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:49,680
Speaker 1: so I basically grew up with him. I always had

530
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:51,800
Speaker 1: a crush on him, but only did something about it

531
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:54,520
Speaker 1: after high school when we started dating. And by the way,

532
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:58,840
Speaker 1: this comes from user communication fit thirty four ninety eight.

533
00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:01,080
Speaker 1: And if you want to meet your own stories, go

534
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:02,840
Speaker 1: to the r slash Okay story time subburn it.

535
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:04,960
Speaker 3: So I'm Dakota, I'm.

536
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,400
Speaker 2: Angie, and I'm Riley.

537
00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,639
Speaker 1: And let's see what op has to say. He was

538
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:09,760
Speaker 1: my world.

539
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 3: We were perfect.

540
00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:13,960
Speaker 1: There wasn't a day he wasn't by my side. I

541
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,720
Speaker 1: really loved him. Two weeks ago, I found out he

542
00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 1: cheated on me with a girl at a party. He

543
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:25,560
Speaker 1: came to me immediately afterward, crying and asking me for forgiveness.

544
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:30,720
Speaker 1: I shattered, literally shattered like glass. I didn't even respond.

545
00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:34,240
Speaker 1: I grabbed my keys and left him in my own house.

546
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:36,760
Speaker 1: My brother called me a few hours later, saying he

547
00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 1: heard what happened and tried to comfort me. We talked

548
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:41,560
Speaker 1: for a while and I told him that I'm breaking

549
00:24:41,640 --> 00:24:44,560
Speaker 1: up with him. He said that wasn't a good idea.

550
00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:47,520
Speaker 1: I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

551
00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:50,720
Speaker 3: Not a good idea that I break up with a guy.

552
00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:53,639
Speaker 1: Who cheated on me. He complained that my ex was

553
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:56,240
Speaker 1: his best friend and he would be really bummed if

554
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:57,480
Speaker 1: I broke up with him.

555
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,800
Speaker 3: Like what I told him, My really didn't care.

556
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:03,359
Speaker 1: I didn't even think he'd still want to be friends

557
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:07,760
Speaker 1: with him after finding out he cheated on his sister. Anyways,

558
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 1: I'm not getting back together with him. Don't get me wrong.

559
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,199
Speaker 1: I loved him a lot, but he cheated on me,

560
00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:16,680
Speaker 1: and that's a level of disrespect I will never tolerate.

561
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:18,919
Speaker 1: My brother and I are not on speaking terms, and

562
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:22,120
Speaker 1: my mom is kind of on his side. She said

563
00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:25,280
Speaker 1: that he's just defending his friend. I'm literally his sister.

564
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 1: There's a lot more that went on in between, but

565
00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,280
Speaker 1: I don't want to make this post too long.

566
00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:32,160
Speaker 3: Let me know if you want me to go into

567
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:35,720
Speaker 3: more detail. Yeah, Am I the a hole? Nah?

568
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 1: And we do want more detail? WHOA Yeah? I think

569
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,879
Speaker 1: literally I'm cutting off both of my brother and my

570
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:43,960
Speaker 1: mom at that point until they apologize to me.

571
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:48,000
Speaker 9: Honestly, I feel like if Van's best friend cheated, like

572
00:25:48,119 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 9: started dating his sister, we'll just start there.

573
00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:53,119
Speaker 3: I feel like it's always the kind of thing where it's.

574
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:54,480
Speaker 1: Like, don't you mess this up.

575
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:56,800
Speaker 9: If you finger on my sister, you know what I mean,

576
00:25:56,840 --> 00:26:00,200
Speaker 9: if you heard my sister, I'm hurt you worse. It's

577
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:01,760
Speaker 9: that kind of thing, like you want to be protective

578
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:06,000
Speaker 9: over your family members.

579
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 3: Exactly.

580
00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 1: That's what if your brother was syrovesor stalone would have

581
00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:10,840
Speaker 1: stood up for you exactly.

582
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:13,119
Speaker 9: So it's like, that's so insane that he's doing the

583
00:26:13,119 --> 00:26:15,440
Speaker 9: complete opposite of what's normal in this situation.

584
00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:17,920
Speaker 1: Yet it's and then the mom backing him up.

585
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, dude, come on wild.

586
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:22,720
Speaker 1: So we have some comments here. Number one is, so,

587
00:26:23,240 --> 00:26:25,399
Speaker 1: who's your brother cheated on? Before?

588
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:25,960
Speaker 3: You know?

589
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:31,399
Speaker 1: Kind stays with kind Op says, you're not wrong, but honestly,

590
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 1: my brother has never been able to keep a talking stage,

591
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 1: much less a girlfriend. However, if he does end up

592
00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:40,920
Speaker 1: cheating on someone, I won't be surprised. Comment or two says,

593
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,760
Speaker 1: not the a hole because of brother's actions. Now he

594
00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:46,480
Speaker 1: gets to share the a whole award that your ex

595
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 1: already had. You are one hundred percent in the right,

596
00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:51,840
Speaker 1: and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Honestly, your brother's

597
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:54,360
Speaker 1: actions are worse than your exes in my opinion, as

598
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,560
Speaker 1: a brother myself with a younger sister, that is a

599
00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:59,240
Speaker 1: sacred bond and he broke it. I am so sorry

600
00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:01,320
Speaker 1: you are dealing with this, and I seriously hope he

601
00:27:01,359 --> 00:27:04,440
Speaker 1: realizes he fed up and makes things right. Op He replies,

602
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:07,919
Speaker 1: I totally agree. The worst part is that this is

603
00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:10,639
Speaker 1: absolutely not like him. We used to be super protective,

604
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 1: and all throughout high school he'd threatened to beat up

605
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:15,919
Speaker 1: any guy who came near me. I don't know what happened.

606
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 1: Commander three says, his friend is known, so you deemed save.

607
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:23,280
Speaker 1: He didn't need to wear the mantle anymore, playing the

608
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:27,600
Speaker 1: stereotype of in high school brother. Was it love or obligation?

609
00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 1: Opie says, honestly, I really did love him. I had

610
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:33,600
Speaker 1: a huge teenage girl crush on him all throughout high school,

611
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 1: but I was scared it would get complicated or he'd

612
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:39,040
Speaker 1: reject me. I'd even write about him in my journal.

613
00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:42,400
Speaker 1: It was really embarrassing. Comment for four, was your brother

614
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:44,520
Speaker 1: with him at the party, by the way, not the

615
00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:47,160
Speaker 1: a hole. On the other hand, your brother is totally

616
00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:49,480
Speaker 1: a buttthole. This is the kind of stuff you remember

617
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:52,359
Speaker 1: for the rest of your life. Please Update. Opie says

618
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:54,479
Speaker 1: he wasn't with him at the party, and quite honestly,

619
00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:56,959
Speaker 1: I don't think there was a party. I think it

620
00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:59,919
Speaker 1: was just a scapegoat. Yeah, the party was in the Pantaloons,

621
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:00,920
Speaker 1: my friends.

622
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:04,560
Speaker 2: In the Japanese the hills of japany Japantes.

623
00:28:04,760 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: Peepees Out, it's a great quote.

624
00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:08,560
Speaker 2: I'll say it everywhere.

625
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 1: Keep He's out, Peepee's brother, an ex boyfriend.

626
00:28:12,320 --> 00:28:14,080
Speaker 3: Need to just go ahead and just do peepes out.

627
00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:16,560
Speaker 3: Hepe's out. Clearly, they're they're clearly, they're down.

628
00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:19,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is sometimes hard to have a very like

629
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:22,440
Speaker 2: strong connection with the bro, but you can't act upon

630
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,199
Speaker 2: it because you both aren't like that way. But you

631
00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:26,040
Speaker 2: also love each other that much. But you can't have

632
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:27,600
Speaker 2: Pepe's out because then it'd be weird and to ruin

633
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:29,040
Speaker 2: the friendship. So you have to be friends and act

634
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:30,640
Speaker 2: like you actually don't like each other that way.

635
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:34,960
Speaker 1: Dude. Honestly, if cheating on your little sister doesn't ruin

636
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,480
Speaker 1: the friendship, I don't think peepees out will do it either.

637
00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 1: Right on that, I think that's really the only thing

638
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 1: that's left to do. Update next day I'll start by

639
00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:48,160
Speaker 1: saying that when I told my brother, who is twenty

640
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 1: two by the way, I was breaking up with his

641
00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:54,120
Speaker 1: best friend, he was angry, and I mean, like really mad.

642
00:28:54,320 --> 00:28:56,640
Speaker 1: He kept telling me that I was trying to hurt

643
00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,360
Speaker 1: his best friend and have him deal with a bummed

644
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 1: out friend, and obviously I was taken aback. He then

645
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,440
Speaker 1: went to go tell on me to my mom. My

646
00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:10,040
Speaker 1: mom called me really upset. She said that I should

647
00:29:10,080 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 1: stop working my brother's nerves and all kinds of nonsense.

648
00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:17,760
Speaker 1: I told her the full story because obviously my brother didn't.

649
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:20,120
Speaker 1: I told her how my ex cheated on me. All

650
00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:22,920
Speaker 1: she said was oh, and then hung up. I hadn't

651
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:25,200
Speaker 1: heard from her since I won't lie. My mom has

652
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:27,880
Speaker 1: always favored my brother, but I excused it as a

653
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:30,480
Speaker 1: boy mom thing. She's never neglected me or treated me

654
00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 1: badly before. She just had an obvious favorite. I've also

655
00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:36,480
Speaker 1: never been one to do the most for anyone's approval.

656
00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:39,120
Speaker 1: A few of you had questions about my brother too,

657
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 1: like if he was also a cheater and if he

658
00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 1: approved of my relationship in the first place.

659
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:49,360
Speaker 3: For the first question, my brother is a loser too.

660
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:56,560
Speaker 1: He's really immature, unlike us, so naturally girls don't want

661
00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,120
Speaker 1: to spend a lot of time with him. I've told

662
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:00,720
Speaker 1: him several times that he should grow up or he'll

663
00:30:00,760 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 1: be single forever. So to answer your question, my brother

664
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,760
Speaker 1: has never even had the chance to cheat. As for

665
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:09,400
Speaker 1: the second question, my brother found it awkward at first,

666
00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:11,680
Speaker 1: but then he got over it. Plus me dating his

667
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:13,960
Speaker 1: best friend meant he'd practically see him twenty four seven,

668
00:30:14,280 --> 00:30:16,360
Speaker 1: so I guess he didn't mind that much. He just

669
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:18,640
Speaker 1: didn't like the PDA and all that stuff.

670
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:20,720
Speaker 9: There isn't much I didn't like seeing that my sister

671
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:21,800
Speaker 9: is living out my dream.

672
00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:25,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, he didn't like getting viciously jealous about all this

673
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:26,640
Speaker 1: smooching you.

674
00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:28,480
Speaker 9: But at least I'll be around him more.

675
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:30,320
Speaker 6: That's to be what I was thinking.

676
00:30:30,560 --> 00:30:33,080
Speaker 1: I'll be right next to him. The smooches happened, and

677
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:35,280
Speaker 1: if I close my eyes tight enough, I can almost

678
00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:39,360
Speaker 1: pretend that it's my smooches. There isn't much to update on.

679
00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:42,720
Speaker 1: My ex has tried and failed to contact me. All

680
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:45,280
Speaker 1: my friends have blocked him, and no one is giving

681
00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:48,760
Speaker 1: him any of my info. He's even tried contacting my boss.

682
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:52,160
Speaker 1: My brother is still insisting I talk to my ex.

683
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:55,000
Speaker 1: I continue to tell him to leave me alone. My

684
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:57,800
Speaker 1: mom is radio silent, and honestly that's for the best.

685
00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:00,160
Speaker 1: Will I get over this, sure.

686
00:31:00,280 --> 00:31:01,400
Speaker 3: But it'll take some time.

687
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 1: I don't think this is something to get therapy over,

688
00:31:03,920 --> 00:31:06,200
Speaker 1: but I'll need some healing for sure. Thank you for

689
00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:09,360
Speaker 1: all your lovely messages and comments. It's comforting to know

690
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,320
Speaker 1: that there are people on my wavelength who understand cheating

691
00:31:12,440 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 1: is a loser behavior true, and tolerance for it is

692
00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:21,160
Speaker 1: even weirder. And there's another update the next day. Oh

693
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,400
Speaker 1: it starts with an edit. Imagine they do like the

694
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:25,240
Speaker 1: brother and the best friend dude just to end up.

695
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:28,640
Speaker 9: Together muchin smoochin in the in the sunset, honestly in.

696
00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:30,880
Speaker 1: A sunset, and honestly, I would be I would still

697
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 1: be so mad about that. I would be satisfied. I'd

698
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,000
Speaker 1: be like my boyfriend who I've had a crush on

699
00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:37,200
Speaker 1: all throughout high school cheated on me with my brother,

700
00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:40,440
Speaker 1: or cheated on me and then got with my brother.

701
00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:42,760
Speaker 9: Maybe maybe it was never a girl at the party.

702
00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 6: Yeah, he was always the brother.

703
00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:48,800
Speaker 1: Maybe it was always the brother. Mmmm, that'd be crazy.

704
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:49,200
Speaker 3: Edit.

705
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:51,800
Speaker 1: I want to preface this by saying I'm one thousand

706
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:55,000
Speaker 1: percent not getting back together with anyone. I'd made my

707
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:58,000
Speaker 1: decision from the beginning and they can try all they want,

708
00:31:58,120 --> 00:32:00,320
Speaker 1: but it's not happening. I spoke to my ex again

709
00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:02,240
Speaker 1: through text to tell him to leave me alone and

710
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:03,440
Speaker 1: stop trying to contact me.

711
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:05,240
Speaker 3: I also told him to come get the stuff he

712
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:06,240
Speaker 3: left at my apartment.

713
00:32:06,320 --> 00:32:07,960
Speaker 1: He went on to tell me that he needed to

714
00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:10,040
Speaker 1: tell me something that he said he needed to tell

715
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:13,040
Speaker 1: me the truth. Uh oh. I did not respond, but

716
00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:15,520
Speaker 1: he kept texting anyway. I was so excited. I'm so

717
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:18,760
Speaker 1: excited it. He proceeded to tell me that he made

718
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:22,000
Speaker 1: everything up, what the cheating story and everything.

719
00:32:22,320 --> 00:32:25,200
Speaker 3: Oh, your honor, it's not what it looks like. That's

720
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:27,920
Speaker 3: not me. That's my long lost brother who looks just

721
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:28,320
Speaker 3: like me.

722
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:32,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, what come on? Obviously I didn't believe him at first,

723
00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 1: but then he went on, However, you guys need to

724
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:37,560
Speaker 1: understand that I really loved this man and have for years,

725
00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:39,200
Speaker 1: so there's a part of me that wants to take

726
00:32:39,240 --> 00:32:41,400
Speaker 1: his word for it. Anyway, he told me that he

727
00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:43,600
Speaker 1: planned the whole thing with my brother, like it was

728
00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:46,280
Speaker 1: some kind of sick prank. Who does that? He called

729
00:32:46,320 --> 00:32:49,000
Speaker 1: it a test, a test for what He told me

730
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:51,000
Speaker 1: to call my brother and tell him to tell me

731
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:53,240
Speaker 1: the truth. Keep in mind that all of this happened

732
00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:55,760
Speaker 1: in a day, by the way, so it was crazy.

733
00:32:55,920 --> 00:32:57,640
Speaker 1: He went on and on about how much he still

734
00:32:57,680 --> 00:32:59,600
Speaker 1: loves me and how he wishes he never listened to

735
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:03,800
Speaker 1: my brother. I felt physically sick. It felt like whiplash. Girl,

736
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 1: this is even worse than if he had just cheated

737
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:06,080
Speaker 1: on you.

738
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 9: Oh yeah, oh yeah, Testing of any kind is such

739
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:10,520
Speaker 9: crappy behavior.

740
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 1: So you're the biggest idiot on the face of the

741
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:16,880
Speaker 1: planet because you thought fake cheating on me was somehow

742
00:33:16,920 --> 00:33:20,600
Speaker 1: a test of what my loyalty, right, And so what

743
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:23,040
Speaker 1: you're looking for in a partner is someone who even

744
00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 1: if I cheat on them, they won't lead you'd buy.

745
00:33:27,160 --> 00:33:30,440
Speaker 9: It's like you just made yourself look unloyal, You stupid.

746
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:32,520
Speaker 3: Okay, we all know this guy did not fake cheat.

747
00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 1: Yeah huh. A few hours later, I called my brother

748
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:37,040
Speaker 1: and told him to open up, just to see his

749
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:40,000
Speaker 1: reaction and if i'd get a similar story from him. Surprisingly,

750
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 1: his story was somewhat similar. Oh my god, It's almost

751
00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 1: like these guys could call and talk to each other

752
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:47,080
Speaker 1: and create this plan together. Yeah, except he made it

753
00:33:47,120 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 1: look like he was just told to keep up with

754
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:51,160
Speaker 1: the lie, rather than being part of the planning. He

755
00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:53,080
Speaker 1: also told me that he was urging me to get

756
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:55,200
Speaker 1: back with my ex because he knew that nothing really

757
00:33:55,240 --> 00:33:57,719
Speaker 1: happened and we would have broken up over nothing. I

758
00:33:57,760 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 1: still think that is very stupid. Don't know what to think.

759
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:03,080
Speaker 1: Who is telling the truth? Also, this isn't you breaking

760
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:05,120
Speaker 1: up over nothing. It's breaking up because he lied to

761
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:08,480
Speaker 1: you about cheating. Yeah, it's breaking up because he is

762
00:34:08,520 --> 00:34:11,319
Speaker 1: now exposed himself as the biggest idiot this.

763
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 3: Side of the Mississippi.

764
00:34:12,680 --> 00:34:14,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly. Why am I still in love with this

765
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:17,960
Speaker 1: absolute clown? A lot of questions and no answers. A

766
00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:20,040
Speaker 1: few of you had some issues with my mom, and

767
00:34:20,080 --> 00:34:22,719
Speaker 1: they're all justified. From a young age, I knew she

768
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 1: had her favorites, but I'm very likable, so if I

769
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,239
Speaker 1: wasn't getting her attention, it really didn't bother me much.

770
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,280
Speaker 1: I know that sounds cocky, but it's the truth.

771
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:31,279
Speaker 3: We talked and she.

772
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:33,320
Speaker 1: Told me that she hadn't known that I was cheated

773
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 1: on until I told her and gave me a curt apology.

774
00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:38,759
Speaker 1: I also don't know if she's telling the truth. She

775
00:34:38,840 --> 00:34:40,960
Speaker 1: also told me that she scolded my brother for lying

776
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,360
Speaker 1: to her and hurting my feelings, as if that was

777
00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:46,759
Speaker 1: meant to make me feel better. Anyways, our relationship will

778
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 1: continue to strain anyway, so I'd rather not focus on that.

779
00:34:50,239 --> 00:34:54,000
Speaker 1: You have a little bit more story left. I think

780
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,920
Speaker 1: your mom sounds like not the coolest cat. Yeah, probably,

781
00:34:57,960 --> 00:34:59,960
Speaker 1: Like I don't know, maybe you don't have to go

782
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:02,440
Speaker 1: no contact or low contact with her, but you can

783
00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:05,800
Speaker 1: do my patented technique of silly babying your mom. Yeah,

784
00:35:05,840 --> 00:35:07,839
Speaker 1: it's just like you don't have to, you know, train

785
00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 1: yourself to give the things that she says less and

786
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:13,200
Speaker 1: less weight over time, because it's hard to when it's

787
00:35:13,200 --> 00:35:16,440
Speaker 1: a parent, Like naturally, we give so much weight to

788
00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:18,880
Speaker 1: the things that our parents say, but when our parents

789
00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:22,279
Speaker 1: are just being silly babies, yeah, you know, we can't

790
00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:23,319
Speaker 1: let that help cut us.

791
00:35:23,200 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 3: To our core, right, So you just go silly baby, Yeah.

792
00:35:26,520 --> 00:35:28,920
Speaker 1: Silly baby can't apologize to me even though she knows

793
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:30,680
Speaker 1: I got cheated on because she's just a little silly baby.

794
00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:33,480
Speaker 9: Cause parents can be wrong sometimes and you are able

795
00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:36,279
Speaker 9: to think that they're wrong. So true, you know, that

796
00:35:36,320 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 9: you're right, he shouldn't have cheated, or if this stupid

797
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:42,759
Speaker 9: lie is true, he shouldn't have tested you.

798
00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:45,839
Speaker 1: He should have trusted you absolutely, So let's get into

799
00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 1: the rest of this story. Some of you ask where

800
00:35:47,760 --> 00:35:50,440
Speaker 1: my dad is in all this. Unfortunately, my dad is

801
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:53,040
Speaker 1: no longer with us. He passed away twelve years ago,

802
00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:55,600
Speaker 1: and it still breaks my heart. I was always told

803
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:57,640
Speaker 1: that I was the apple of his eye, and his

804
00:35:57,719 --> 00:36:00,680
Speaker 1: world didn't seem complete until I was born. I carry

805
00:36:00,760 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 1: him with me everywhere I go. I find comfort in

806
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:04,719
Speaker 1: the idea that he would have stuck up for me

807
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:07,399
Speaker 1: right now. I love him so much, even till this day,

808
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,600
Speaker 1: I'm sure he would have stuck up for you. Op.

809
00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 1: I'm currently typing all of this very late at night

810
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:16,000
Speaker 1: because I've been pondering all day. This has practically consumed

811
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:18,400
Speaker 1: my life, and I'm sick of it. It also doesn't

812
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 1: help that my town is relatively tiny and everyone from

813
00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:25,399
Speaker 1: my graduating class already knows everything. I'm more fed up

814
00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 1: than I am sad, but I won't let it bother

815
00:36:27,680 --> 00:36:31,280
Speaker 1: me for too long. But seriously, and whoever is controlling

816
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:33,440
Speaker 1: the TV show that is my life, give me a

817
00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:37,680
Speaker 1: break and There are some comments here. Comment one, the

818
00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:40,799
Speaker 1: prank story is a lie that your ex and brother

819
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:42,960
Speaker 1: came up with as an excuse to get you back together.

820
00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 1: Trust your gut and move on with your life. It

821
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: will not get better, only worse from here. Coming here

822
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:52,479
Speaker 1: two says one hundred percent. Original story says he came

823
00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:55,759
Speaker 1: to her crying. That's a pretty good acting job for

824
00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:58,320
Speaker 1: a prank, even if he was actually lying for a prank,

825
00:36:58,400 --> 00:37:01,000
Speaker 1: which is dubious. Why would you stay with someone who

826
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:03,440
Speaker 1: would manipulate you and play with your feelings like that?

827
00:37:03,719 --> 00:37:06,279
Speaker 1: How could you possibly trust him again? Opie says, that's

828
00:37:06,360 --> 00:37:08,960
Speaker 1: exactly what I told him. Why would he put so

829
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:11,640
Speaker 1: much effort into it if it isn't true? And Commander

830
00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:13,680
Speaker 1: three says, Ohpi, it sounds like you have no support

831
00:37:13,719 --> 00:37:16,160
Speaker 1: in your town or from your family. Quietly look for

832
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 1: a job somewhere else, then disappear without telling anyone where

833
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 1: you went, start fresh, without all the judgment. OPI says

834
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 1: that would be kind of difficult, considering I go to

835
00:37:23,719 --> 00:37:26,600
Speaker 1: school here. My town isn't a problem. I'm more upset

836
00:37:26,600 --> 00:37:29,000
Speaker 1: that people outside my circle already know about it. I'll

837
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 1: definitely be getting out of here after I graduate though. Yeah,

838
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:33,719
Speaker 1: I was about to say that, you don't. I just

839
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:36,560
Speaker 1: have to cut and run right now. Commenter four says,

840
00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:40,840
Speaker 1: whoof man, what a wild update? Do you know the

841
00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:44,239
Speaker 1: girl he cheated with. I'm like, this is all verifiable,

842
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:48,760
Speaker 1: really easily regardless. I would trust your gut like everyone

843
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:51,759
Speaker 1: else is saying. Opie says, I considered looking, but I

844
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:54,640
Speaker 1: felt it was pointless true and also I really don't

845
00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:56,759
Speaker 1: want to know what she looked like. I'm a black

846
00:37:56,800 --> 00:37:59,160
Speaker 1: woman in a little white town, which I love, but

847
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:00,799
Speaker 1: I feel like it would it hurt if I knew

848
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:04,160
Speaker 1: he cheated on me with someone who looked nothing like me. Hey,

849
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:06,359
Speaker 1: it's Sam. We'll get back to the stories, but here's

850
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 1: three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

851
00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:13,160
Speaker 6: I stranded my coworkers at the airport because they were irresponsible.

852
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:16,360
Speaker 1: Which airport, that's the most important question.

853
00:38:17,680 --> 00:38:20,360
Speaker 6: This past week, I was presented with an industry award

854
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:23,880
Speaker 6: in Nashville that an agency partner nominated me for. I

855
00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:26,960
Speaker 6: am a director at my company. My company decided to

856
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:29,840
Speaker 6: send two junior level employees to the event as well

857
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:32,360
Speaker 6: because they thought it would be a good experience for them.

858
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,760
Speaker 6: A specialist who has been with us for a little

859
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 6: over a year. Twenty five female, first job out of

860
00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:39,680
Speaker 6: college and a summer intern. Twenty one female and a

861
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:42,880
Speaker 6: rising senior. They are not on my team. They report

862
00:38:42,960 --> 00:38:45,920
Speaker 6: up through a separate VP, and I have very limited

863
00:38:46,080 --> 00:38:48,759
Speaker 6: or no interaction with them in daily work life. By

864
00:38:48,800 --> 00:38:51,960
Speaker 6: the way, this comes from Diligent Pineapple thirty five and

865
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:54,040
Speaker 6: if you want to submit your own stories just like

866
00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:56,920
Speaker 6: this one, go to the r slash okay storytime subreddit.

867
00:38:57,040 --> 00:39:00,560
Speaker 6: So they were very excited to be going. This was

868
00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:02,880
Speaker 6: going to be the specialist's first time on a plane.

869
00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:05,920
Speaker 6: Lots of team chats asking what's where, et cetera. We

870
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:08,800
Speaker 6: were flying in on Thursday morning and leaving Friday evening,

871
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 6: so it was a very short trip. But I tried

872
00:39:11,239 --> 00:39:15,680
Speaker 6: to help share info about the event, like types of attendees, awards, reception,

873
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:19,040
Speaker 6: presentation Thursday night with a country Western theme. When I

874
00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:21,680
Speaker 6: was speaking on the panel on Friday morning, There's so

875
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:24,320
Speaker 6: much I could say, but I'll try to highlight key points.

876
00:39:24,400 --> 00:39:27,600
Speaker 6: The specialists barely made the Thursday am flight because she

877
00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:30,360
Speaker 6: doesn't have a real ID and had to do extra screening.

878
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:33,080
Speaker 6: She had no idea what a real ID was or

879
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:36,880
Speaker 6: the basic rules of flying, liquid destrictions, et cetera, and

880
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:39,680
Speaker 6: she was very upset that they made her throw away

881
00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:43,000
Speaker 6: some of her skincare that was over three ounces. Thursday

882
00:39:43,040 --> 00:39:46,480
Speaker 6: night's event was country Western theme, and while a majority

883
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:49,200
Speaker 6: of people were there in business casual, the intern showed

884
00:39:49,239 --> 00:39:53,239
Speaker 6: up in a bandana, tube top, microskirt, cowboy boots, and

885
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:56,279
Speaker 6: a cowboy hat. That's a little much for country western night.

886
00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:57,400
Speaker 1: For the work party.

887
00:39:57,560 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 6: This is still a work event.

888
00:39:58,880 --> 00:39:59,120
Speaker 1: Yeah.

889
00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:01,759
Speaker 6: I pulled her aside and asked if she wanted to

890
00:40:01,840 --> 00:40:04,600
Speaker 6: run upstairs and change since it was still a business event,

891
00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:07,200
Speaker 6: but she said she was fine and she thought she

892
00:40:07,280 --> 00:40:11,160
Speaker 6: looked cute and on theme. After the ceremony, I invite

893
00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 6: them to join me with some colleagues I knew from

894
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:15,880
Speaker 6: other companies in the hotel bar. But they tell me

895
00:40:16,040 --> 00:40:18,800
Speaker 6: they wanted to check out Broadway. I make a face

896
00:40:18,840 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 6: and say this would be a good networking opportunity. They

897
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 6: make come on mom jokes, and so I tell them

898
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,600
Speaker 6: to be safe and remind them the time and location

899
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:30,239
Speaker 6: of the first session. The next day. I text them

900
00:40:30,239 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 6: around eleven PM and I hope they got back safe.

901
00:40:33,120 --> 00:40:36,120
Speaker 6: No response. Went to bed. Text them the next morning

902
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:40,400
Speaker 6: offering to meet them for coffee before morning sessions. No response,

903
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:44,200
Speaker 6: no idea if they actually attend any sessions or saw

904
00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:46,440
Speaker 6: my panel. But I did find them in the hotel

905
00:40:46,440 --> 00:40:51,080
Speaker 6: lobby afterward, looking incredibly hungover. Have about two hours after

906
00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 6: the event is over and before we needed to go

907
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 6: to the airport. I invite them to late lunch with

908
00:40:55,719 --> 00:40:58,440
Speaker 6: our agency partners, dase a Cline because they want to

909
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:01,279
Speaker 6: go to the Country Music Hall of Fame again. Make

910
00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:03,040
Speaker 6: a face and say, I don't know if they will

911
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:04,719
Speaker 6: have time, and I think it would be a good

912
00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:08,080
Speaker 6: opportunity for them to spend time with our agency. They

913
00:41:08,160 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 6: act like I'm a wet blanket. So I tell them

914
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:13,359
Speaker 6: I'm leaving for the airport from the hotel at four

915
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:16,040
Speaker 6: pm sharp and meet me in the main lobby so

916
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 6: we can share a lift. Text them at three forty

917
00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:21,880
Speaker 6: five pm that the lift is arriving in fifteen minutes.

918
00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:24,840
Speaker 6: No response. Text them that the lift has arrived and

919
00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 6: I'm leaving for the airport. No response. Text them when

920
00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:30,640
Speaker 6: I get to the airport and tell them security line

921
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:33,600
Speaker 6: is long, neither had pre check. No response.

922
00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:36,799
Speaker 1: Dude, this is so clear, like these girls think they're

923
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:37,400
Speaker 1: on vacation.

924
00:41:37,600 --> 00:41:39,920
Speaker 6: Yeah, this is a work trip.

925
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:40,560
Speaker 1: It's a trip.

926
00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:43,920
Speaker 6: Yes, you're somewhere exciting, Yes, but the company is paying

927
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 6: you for work there. Yeah, you're there for work, especially

928
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:50,680
Speaker 6: like one of them's an intern. Yeah, one of them

929
00:41:50,719 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 6: is an intern, and one of them has only been

930
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:55,400
Speaker 6: there for a year. Let's let's not forget that. You

931
00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:58,200
Speaker 6: don't have the job. You're there for a specific period

932
00:41:58,200 --> 00:41:59,880
Speaker 6: of time, and if you want the job, you have

933
00:41:59,920 --> 00:42:02,920
Speaker 6: to impress the people exactly. You clearly not impressed this

934
00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:06,080
Speaker 6: person who's clearly gonna tell your higher ups and they

935
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:07,399
Speaker 6: will not be impressed either.

936
00:42:07,600 --> 00:42:11,279
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, bad moves all around from the junior employees here.

937
00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:13,480
Speaker 6: Text them when I get to the gate to please

938
00:42:13,520 --> 00:42:16,560
Speaker 6: give me some sign of life. The intern sends a

939
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:20,240
Speaker 6: very short response. About ten minutes later. In lift, there's traffic,

940
00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:23,200
Speaker 6: nothing else. Text them the flight of starting's board and

941
00:42:23,239 --> 00:42:25,880
Speaker 6: no response. Text them when I'm in my seat that

942
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:30,000
Speaker 6: boarding is about to end, no response. The door's closed.

943
00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:33,160
Speaker 6: They don't make it. Put my phone in airplane mode.

944
00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:36,200
Speaker 6: Land a couple hours later to a barrage of texts

945
00:42:36,280 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 6: from them. They're stranded in Nashville. Don't know what to do,

946
00:42:40,440 --> 00:42:43,120
Speaker 6: how to rebook, who to call for help, et cetera.

947
00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 6: I also have an angry voicemail from the specialist mom

948
00:42:46,840 --> 00:42:49,960
Speaker 6: that I abandoned her daughter in Nashville. She has never

949
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,759
Speaker 6: flown and has anxiety. She's having a panic attack at

950
00:42:52,800 --> 00:42:56,000
Speaker 6: the airport. She needs medical attention and she could be sure.

951
00:42:57,040 --> 00:43:00,360
Speaker 6: Why wait wait, why is your mom part of this situation? Suation?

952
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:05,440
Speaker 6: Oh no, this specialist again is twenty five years old. Yeah,

953
00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:09,440
Speaker 6: she's been working at the company, Like she's ostensibly like

954
00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:14,719
Speaker 6: independent somehow. If she's going on this trip by herself.

955
00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:16,879
Speaker 1: I would assume at twenty five, you should know how

956
00:43:16,880 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 1: to at least you know, I missed my flight. This

957
00:43:20,680 --> 00:43:23,080
Speaker 1: person's never flown before. But it's like, dude, go you

958
00:43:23,080 --> 00:43:27,080
Speaker 1: can't have your mom calling right, You're a superior to

959
00:43:27,239 --> 00:43:30,480
Speaker 1: yell at them. That's crazy, Like I will be astounded

960
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:32,640
Speaker 1: if both of these people are still working for this company.

961
00:43:32,680 --> 00:43:34,879
Speaker 6: That's why I get a trip to HR. And also,

962
00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:38,800
Speaker 6: like basic instinct for me is, oh, no, I missed

963
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,400
Speaker 6: my flight. Let me talk to the front desk, Let

964
00:43:41,440 --> 00:43:43,480
Speaker 6: me talk to the attendance here. Let me talk to

965
00:43:43,600 --> 00:43:44,760
Speaker 6: the information person.

966
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:47,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh I missed my flight. What do I do? Person?

967
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:50,080
Speaker 1: Standing directly in front of me. Two can help me

968
00:43:50,760 --> 00:43:52,799
Speaker 1: like instead, it's no, I'm gonna call my mom tell

969
00:43:52,840 --> 00:43:54,400
Speaker 1: I'm having a panic attack, and she's gonna call my

970
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:55,960
Speaker 1: superior and be mad at that.

971
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:59,040
Speaker 6: Also, I love the mom jumping straight to my daughter.

972
00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:02,560
Speaker 1: Could be yeah, I don't know, Yeah, that's my daughter crazy.

973
00:44:02,800 --> 00:44:05,480
Speaker 1: Implying that she's just gonna get kidnapped at the airport

974
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:06,440
Speaker 1: is wild.

975
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:09,560
Speaker 6: She could be taken by people who should not be

976
00:44:09,640 --> 00:44:10,160
Speaker 6: taking her.

977
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:13,439
Speaker 1: Just trafficked. Trafficked at the airport.

978
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:17,120
Speaker 6: I called the specialist and intern back. Both phones ring,

979
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:20,440
Speaker 6: but neither pick up. We're seeing a pattern here. Yeah,

980
00:44:20,560 --> 00:44:23,879
Speaker 6: Text to see if they were able to rebook. No response,

981
00:44:24,320 --> 00:44:27,520
Speaker 6: Forward them email with our business travel info and after

982
00:44:27,680 --> 00:44:30,680
Speaker 6: hours contact and text them that I sent the email,

983
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:34,200
Speaker 6: no response. Texted an hour or so later to see

984
00:44:34,239 --> 00:44:37,960
Speaker 6: if they were okay. No response. Did not call the

985
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:40,480
Speaker 6: mom back. I also have a text from their director.

986
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:42,560
Speaker 6: I don't know her well and she just started with

987
00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:45,319
Speaker 6: the company a couple weeks ago, asking what's going on.

988
00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:48,680
Speaker 6: I sent her a brief overview in screenshots of all

989
00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:51,200
Speaker 6: my unanswered texts to them from earlier in the day,

990
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,880
Speaker 6: along with the transcript of the voice message I got

991
00:44:53,920 --> 00:44:57,640
Speaker 6: from the mom. She acknowledges my response, but no further dialogue.

992
00:44:57,719 --> 00:44:59,920
Speaker 6: Now I get an invite for a Monday morning meeting

993
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:03,440
Speaker 6: from that director with their VP and our C suite leader.

994
00:45:03,719 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 6: My VP is on PTO.

995
00:45:05,920 --> 00:45:09,320
Speaker 3: For those who don't know corporate lingo, that's paid time.

996
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:11,760
Speaker 6: Off and c suite is the corporate head.

997
00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:14,120
Speaker 1: And you don't want to be having any meetings when

998
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:15,279
Speaker 1: you're on paid time off.

999
00:45:15,640 --> 00:45:18,040
Speaker 6: A talk with the c suite is never going to

1000
00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:20,720
Speaker 6: be very sweet unless you're up for like a promotion

1001
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:24,000
Speaker 6: or something. Yeah, this is no commotions here. There's no

1002
00:45:24,040 --> 00:45:28,200
Speaker 6: promotions happening. Yeah, possibly the opposite. I feel like these

1003
00:45:28,239 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 6: are adults. I was communicative and I'm ultimately not responsible

1004
00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:34,600
Speaker 6: for their decisions. But you tell me, am I the

1005
00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:37,440
Speaker 6: ahole here. We do have some comments, so let's get

1006
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:40,759
Speaker 6: to them. Some from miss Hibernia. I think op went

1007
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:44,879
Speaker 6: incredibly above and beyond here, considering that this was a

1008
00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:50,200
Speaker 6: work event. She was receiving an award app in all caps.

1009
00:45:50,239 --> 00:45:55,560
Speaker 10: Yet literally being awarded for your work, Like, obviously, OPI's

1010
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:58,359
Speaker 10: doing something right, yeah at work. So so to have

1011
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:01,920
Speaker 10: these junior idiots causing any type of fuss was really

1012
00:46:01,960 --> 00:46:04,440
Speaker 10: an unnecessary hassle for her when it should have been

1013
00:46:04,480 --> 00:46:08,920
Speaker 10: a personal celebration, and Nop responds, Okay, thank you so

1014
00:46:09,080 --> 00:46:10,920
Speaker 10: much for seeing this because I took it out of

1015
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:13,400
Speaker 10: my main post since it was long already. But I

1016
00:46:13,480 --> 00:46:16,319
Speaker 10: made a short acceptance speech after getting the award. I

1017
00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:19,080
Speaker 10: worked really hard on it and practiced a lot. It

1018
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:21,920
Speaker 10: was only like ninety seconds, but I asked for specialist

1019
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:24,120
Speaker 10: and interm to film it for me because I wanted

1020
00:46:24,160 --> 00:46:26,279
Speaker 10: to share it with my team members who helped me

1021
00:46:26,320 --> 00:46:28,920
Speaker 10: with it, left my phone with them and everything, but

1022
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:32,800
Speaker 10: they forgot, and that kind of upset me. It's obviously

1023
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:35,920
Speaker 10: not the end of the world, but like, come on, ASoP,

1024
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:37,799
Speaker 10: I know you didn't really know these people very well,

1025
00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 10: but these are not the people you want to leave

1026
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:42,800
Speaker 10: your phone with or anything. Like you leave a plant

1027
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:44,520
Speaker 10: with them, You're not getting that plant back alive.

1028
00:46:44,760 --> 00:46:45,719
Speaker 1: No, definitely not plan.

1029
00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:50,279
Speaker 6: Nope, you'll get an entirely different plan. Yeah, Harry Ohm

1030
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 6: Tatsat said, so they even failed it. The only job

1031
00:46:53,640 --> 00:46:57,480
Speaker 6: you gave them with explicit instructions, filmed my speech an

1032
00:46:57,520 --> 00:47:01,239
Speaker 6: official speech at an official event. Definitely worth including in

1033
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:05,440
Speaker 6: your bullet points. Leechigo commented, you were there as their coworker,

1034
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:08,760
Speaker 6: not as their mother. Firstly, no one should be expecting

1035
00:47:08,760 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 6: you to take care of them in that way. They're adults,

1036
00:47:11,840 --> 00:47:14,320
Speaker 6: and even when you did offer them direction and support,

1037
00:47:14,600 --> 00:47:17,239
Speaker 6: they didn't even have the decency to get back to you.

1038
00:47:17,440 --> 00:47:20,680
Speaker 6: And a call from her mom, good Christ, your lord.

1039
00:47:20,920 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 6: I would come prepared with documentation and also let your

1040
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 6: supervisor know, even if they're on PTO, that this is

1041
00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 6: what was happening. Max seventeen twenty one commented, the call

1042
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:33,880
Speaker 6: from her mom is what really gets me as an adult,

1043
00:47:33,920 --> 00:47:36,160
Speaker 6: I fully understand calling your mom for help when you're

1044
00:47:36,160 --> 00:47:38,759
Speaker 6: panicked like this girl stuck at an airport with no

1045
00:47:38,880 --> 00:47:41,919
Speaker 6: flying experience. I would one hundred percent call my mom

1046
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:45,200
Speaker 6: if I were panicking in that situation. My mom, however,

1047
00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:48,319
Speaker 6: would help me get my crap together and calm down

1048
00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:51,680
Speaker 6: and solve the problem myself, not call another person on

1049
00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:54,520
Speaker 6: the business trip and yell at them for leaving me stranded.

1050
00:47:54,760 --> 00:47:58,359
Speaker 6: That far acrosses the line. Apprehensive Mark twenty said they

1051
00:47:58,360 --> 00:48:01,920
Speaker 6: seem to have mistaken the business trip for a vacation. Also,

1052
00:48:01,960 --> 00:48:06,839
Speaker 6: they acted irresponsibly around time dressing and networking possibilities. None

1053
00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:09,759
Speaker 6: of this is your fault. You are not their mother.

1054
00:48:10,080 --> 00:48:12,520
Speaker 6: You treated them like the adults they are. The fact

1055
00:48:12,600 --> 00:48:15,120
Speaker 6: that they didn't act like adults is not on you,

1056
00:48:15,800 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 6: not the a hole. Rebecca McCullen said after their behavior

1057
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:21,560
Speaker 6: on this trip, I'll be surprised if they ever get

1058
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:24,200
Speaker 6: a chance to go on another company funded trip, let

1059
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:28,200
Speaker 6: alone still have a job. Yeah, exactly, judgment NTA. And

1060
00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:29,759
Speaker 6: there's an update from one day later.

1061
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:33,319
Speaker 1: But yeah, I agree, and they will be blessed if

1062
00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:35,839
Speaker 1: they still had jobs after this, because who in their

1063
00:48:35,920 --> 00:48:38,520
Speaker 1: right mind would just like, you know, keep these people

1064
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:39,319
Speaker 1: on when it's right.

1065
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:41,440
Speaker 3: Oh, you literally.

1066
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:44,200
Speaker 1: Failed at the only thing you were asked to do,

1067
00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:48,040
Speaker 1: and then you missed the flights and then your mom called.

1068
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:50,080
Speaker 1: It's like three strikes immediately.

1069
00:48:50,160 --> 00:48:53,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, there's a huge display of lack of professionalism and

1070
00:48:53,600 --> 00:48:56,600
Speaker 6: concern here. Like one, you had your mom call somebody

1071
00:48:56,640 --> 00:49:00,880
Speaker 6: that's incredibly weird too. Yeah, you wasted come any resources

1072
00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:03,799
Speaker 6: for the flight there and the flight back, right, and

1073
00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:06,200
Speaker 6: are possibly going to have to like bug someone who's

1074
00:49:06,239 --> 00:49:09,680
Speaker 6: on the after hours line and then book another flight

1075
00:49:09,880 --> 00:49:12,319
Speaker 6: so that's even more money. Correct, and then you're not

1076
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:15,040
Speaker 6: even there for the purpose that the company sent you.

1077
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:17,680
Speaker 1: These people were not ready to be in work mode.

1078
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:18,640
Speaker 1: Let's get into that.

1079
00:49:18,680 --> 00:49:22,759
Speaker 6: Update ALRIGHTY an update from one day later. Here's my

1080
00:49:22,880 --> 00:49:26,959
Speaker 6: update from my meeting this morning. Meeting over CMO didn't join.

1081
00:49:27,320 --> 00:49:30,759
Speaker 6: It was the other VPN director plus the internship coordinator

1082
00:49:30,920 --> 00:49:34,359
Speaker 6: who is in hr VP, asked all the questions. It

1083
00:49:34,400 --> 00:49:38,520
Speaker 6: was over teams on camera, recorded almost comically formal. I

1084
00:49:38,560 --> 00:49:41,440
Speaker 6: feel like I was being deposed or something. During the meeting,

1085
00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:44,279
Speaker 6: it was asked to recap what happened starting from when

1086
00:49:44,320 --> 00:49:47,160
Speaker 6: we arrived. I was prepared, had all my key points,

1087
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:51,120
Speaker 6: kept it factual on my actions, no speculation on their actions.

1088
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:54,040
Speaker 6: I shared my phone screen live, went through the text

1089
00:49:54,040 --> 00:49:57,719
Speaker 6: messages with timestamps and the voicemail from specialists Mom. I

1090
00:49:57,880 --> 00:50:00,879
Speaker 6: was asked if I had requested or encouraged to put

1091
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:03,719
Speaker 6: any expenses on her Peak card. This question took me

1092
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:06,960
Speaker 6: by surprise. I said I didn't even ask or consider

1093
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:09,160
Speaker 6: that she had a Peak card, and beside the lift

1094
00:50:09,200 --> 00:50:11,880
Speaker 6: from the airports of the hotel, which I scheduled and

1095
00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:14,840
Speaker 6: paid for, I was never outside of the hotel or

1096
00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:18,520
Speaker 6: official conference activities with either the specialist or the intern

1097
00:50:18,640 --> 00:50:21,239
Speaker 6: that would have required any sort of payment. I did

1098
00:50:21,280 --> 00:50:23,960
Speaker 6: say I would consider it to be her line manager's

1099
00:50:24,000 --> 00:50:27,680
Speaker 6: responsibility to make sure she understood our travel and expense

1100
00:50:27,719 --> 00:50:30,879
Speaker 6: policies prior to traveling. I was asked if at any

1101
00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:33,040
Speaker 6: point I had reached out to anyone at the office

1102
00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 6: about anything that was transpiring, to which I said no.

1103
00:50:36,560 --> 00:50:39,000
Speaker 6: I certainly intended to when I returned, but we were

1104
00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:41,799
Speaker 6: talking about everything that happened within a thirty two ish

1105
00:50:42,000 --> 00:50:44,520
Speaker 6: hour window, all while I was trying to focus on

1106
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:47,360
Speaker 6: what I was sent there to do. Participate as a

1107
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:51,360
Speaker 6: panel member at the conference, attend other presentations, take advantage

1108
00:50:51,360 --> 00:50:54,000
Speaker 6: of face to face time with our agency, and accepting

1109
00:50:54,040 --> 00:50:57,200
Speaker 6: my award. Let's not forget this is an award four OP,

1110
00:50:57,640 --> 00:50:59,520
Speaker 6: this is a company event, I said. I felt it

1111
00:50:59,520 --> 00:51:03,160
Speaker 6: was reasonable to believe any other attendees would have expectations

1112
00:51:03,200 --> 00:51:07,440
Speaker 6: for participation in outcomes set by their leadership team, especially

1113
00:51:07,440 --> 00:51:10,680
Speaker 6: when coming from another department where I wouldn't be knowledgeable

1114
00:51:10,719 --> 00:51:14,120
Speaker 6: about their goals and objectives. Similarly, if there were different

1115
00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:17,520
Speaker 6: expectations of me based on other company attendees, I would

1116
00:51:17,600 --> 00:51:21,000
Speaker 6: expect that to be clearly communicated in advance. I was

1117
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:23,920
Speaker 6: not asked if I thought intern and or specialist should

1118
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:26,680
Speaker 6: receive any sort of reprimand, and I didn't feel comfortable

1119
00:51:26,680 --> 00:51:29,040
Speaker 6: trying to interject something like that based on the flow

1120
00:51:29,040 --> 00:51:31,840
Speaker 6: of conversation. I'm under the impression that their meeting with

1121
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:35,520
Speaker 6: specialists and interns separately, but my meeting was first. After

1122
00:51:35,560 --> 00:51:38,320
Speaker 6: the meeting, I debriefed with a trusted colleague who shared

1123
00:51:38,360 --> 00:51:40,920
Speaker 6: the following from Friday water cooler chats.

1124
00:51:41,200 --> 00:51:43,280
Speaker 3: Oh, here comes the hot goss.

1125
00:51:45,120 --> 00:51:48,479
Speaker 6: It's always great when you get like the secret chat

1126
00:51:48,480 --> 00:51:49,440
Speaker 6: from somebody's Eah.

1127
00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:52,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, here's the down low the water cooler chat.

1128
00:51:52,360 --> 00:51:55,640
Speaker 6: I definitely offended intern by pulling her aside about her outfit.

1129
00:51:56,040 --> 00:51:58,319
Speaker 6: She posted it to Snapchat with a caption about it,

1130
00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:01,720
Speaker 6: and some other interns or imployees saw it passing away

1131
00:52:01,960 --> 00:52:05,280
Speaker 6: to know exactly what it said, but coworker said everyone

1132
00:52:05,280 --> 00:52:07,680
Speaker 6: who did see it agreed it was inappropriate for a

1133
00:52:07,719 --> 00:52:12,239
Speaker 6: work event. Allegedly, all Caps Specialist's mom had once called

1134
00:52:12,360 --> 00:52:15,560
Speaker 6: previous director who left the director in the meeting today

1135
00:52:15,600 --> 00:52:19,880
Speaker 6: replaced him about specialists working hours. It is known that

1136
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:23,440
Speaker 6: several months ago, specialist was pulled off a high profile

1137
00:52:23,560 --> 00:52:26,360
Speaker 6: project team, apparently when she was asked to put in

1138
00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:29,080
Speaker 6: some evening and weekend hours to meet a deadline. Mom

1139
00:52:29,160 --> 00:52:33,120
Speaker 6: called director and complained, what is going on in this

1140
00:52:33,160 --> 00:52:33,879
Speaker 6: person's life?

1141
00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:36,120
Speaker 1: Ah, there's no way you can't work for the company

1142
00:52:36,160 --> 00:52:41,759
Speaker 1: if your mom is managing you, that's crazy, that's crazy.

1143
00:52:41,320 --> 00:52:43,720
Speaker 6: It's insane, it's not normal.

1144
00:52:43,800 --> 00:52:45,560
Speaker 1: Like you're twenty five not fifteen.

1145
00:52:46,200 --> 00:52:48,799
Speaker 6: You go into a job and I feel like the

1146
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:52,399
Speaker 6: expectations of work, of weekend hours and like like late

1147
00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 6: nights are pretty much told to you in advance. And

1148
00:52:55,160 --> 00:52:57,240
Speaker 6: if it's a high profile project.

1149
00:52:57,000 --> 00:52:59,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, what are you doing? Not a team player?

1150
00:53:00,480 --> 00:53:02,680
Speaker 6: Don't know if I believe this to be true, but

1151
00:53:02,760 --> 00:53:05,279
Speaker 6: mom stepping in could be a pattern. What I'm hoping

1152
00:53:05,320 --> 00:53:09,279
Speaker 6: helps validate my testimony is separately, on Friday, one of

1153
00:53:09,320 --> 00:53:13,160
Speaker 6: my agency partners I was with emailed my CMO. But

1154
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:16,320
Speaker 6: a conversation we had after the ceremony on Thursday evening

1155
00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:19,759
Speaker 6: with some ideas he had typical agency salesy stuff, But

1156
00:53:19,840 --> 00:53:23,319
Speaker 6: he also unknowingly corroborated my alibi on Thursday night. So

1157
00:53:23,360 --> 00:53:25,920
Speaker 6: that's where we're at. Last night, I had convinced myself

1158
00:53:25,920 --> 00:53:28,320
Speaker 6: this all would result in me receiving a big apology

1159
00:53:28,400 --> 00:53:31,040
Speaker 6: or acknowledgment of wrongdoing. And then I shouldn't have had

1160
00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:33,239
Speaker 6: to deal with this et cetera, but I didn't, which

1161
00:53:33,239 --> 00:53:35,759
Speaker 6: makes me feel this is still a bit unresolved. I

1162
00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:38,040
Speaker 6: did send all of my notes to VP on Sunday,

1163
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:41,080
Speaker 6: but his PTO is medical related, and I know he's

1164
00:53:41,080 --> 00:53:43,520
Speaker 6: not able to really check in, So just keeping my

1165
00:53:43,560 --> 00:53:46,440
Speaker 6: head down until I hear anything else. And there's more comments.

1166
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:48,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's just dig into the comments.

1167
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:52,279
Speaker 6: So Chris FF nineteen eighty nine says, sounds like they

1168
00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:54,960
Speaker 6: paid for random stuff using their company card and tried

1169
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:57,799
Speaker 6: to blame you for it. I'd be shocked if they

1170
00:53:57,880 --> 00:54:02,200
Speaker 6: keep their jobs. MSK one said thank you for this update.

1171
00:54:02,480 --> 00:54:05,200
Speaker 6: You won't get an apology. That's not how this works.

1172
00:54:05,360 --> 00:54:08,320
Speaker 6: One of the leadership may tacitly acknowledge that their behavior

1173
00:54:08,440 --> 00:54:11,560
Speaker 6: is wrong, but your involvement in this saga is over.

1174
00:54:11,920 --> 00:54:14,480
Speaker 6: My prediction, this is a career limiting event for the

1175
00:54:14,520 --> 00:54:16,880
Speaker 6: both of them. The intern will not be receiving an

1176
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:19,719
Speaker 6: offer and specialists will be terminated for using her peak

1177
00:54:19,760 --> 00:54:23,239
Speaker 6: card for unapproved items. Determination will actually be for her

1178
00:54:23,280 --> 00:54:27,080
Speaker 6: helicopter mother, but on paper it'll be for expense policy violations.

1179
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:27,960
Speaker 1: Okay, here are you.

1180
00:54:28,160 --> 00:54:32,279
Speaker 6: There's another update. There's another update five days later. Was

1181
00:54:32,320 --> 00:54:36,400
Speaker 6: I actually docked? Yes. While I received many incorrect guesses

1182
00:54:36,400 --> 00:54:39,440
Speaker 6: at my true identity, there were a couple that were correct.

1183
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:42,120
Speaker 6: And holy crap, is that scary.

1184
00:54:42,160 --> 00:54:42,480
Speaker 1: Wow.

1185
00:54:42,719 --> 00:54:44,359
Speaker 6: I don't know what compels a person to go through

1186
00:54:44,400 --> 00:54:46,600
Speaker 6: such lengths to try and figure out who a random

1187
00:54:46,640 --> 00:54:48,919
Speaker 6: internet poster is. But maybe you don't spend your time

1188
00:54:49,000 --> 00:54:49,520
Speaker 6: doing that.

1189
00:54:49,760 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 1: I mean, you probably got like the date of when

1190
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:55,880
Speaker 1: it happened. It was in Nashville. It's a sales e

1191
00:54:56,080 --> 00:54:59,040
Speaker 1: type job. Like you did, give enough information for someone

1192
00:54:59,080 --> 00:55:01,399
Speaker 1: to figure out me. Maybe who you are? You said

1193
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:02,240
Speaker 1: you won an award.

1194
00:55:02,360 --> 00:55:04,239
Speaker 6: Yeah, you won an award. You were there with two

1195
00:55:04,280 --> 00:55:07,000
Speaker 6: other intern yeahs who weren't there with you?

1196
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:11,480
Speaker 1: Be careful, folks, don't accidentally docks yourself out there.

1197
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:14,080
Speaker 6: So far, I have not been reprimanded over it. But

1198
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:16,719
Speaker 6: except whatever it comes of this, it's not my most

1199
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:20,160
Speaker 6: professional move to air out others. Not most professional moves

1200
00:55:20,200 --> 00:55:22,920
Speaker 6: on the internet, and I will seek a healthier outlet

1201
00:55:23,160 --> 00:55:26,400
Speaker 6: in the future. Maybe I'll make friendship bracelets or try

1202
00:55:26,560 --> 00:55:29,880
Speaker 6: diamond painting. Will specialists and or intern be fired? To

1203
00:55:29,920 --> 00:55:33,080
Speaker 6: my knowledge, they're still employed, although today is the official

1204
00:55:33,200 --> 00:55:36,439
Speaker 6: last day for the entire summer intern cohort. I would

1205
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:38,560
Speaker 6: handle one of my team members if they did this,

1206
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:41,040
Speaker 6: but I trust they would never ever ever because they're

1207
00:55:41,040 --> 00:55:44,080
Speaker 6: sensible and smart and amazing and probably reading this. But

1208
00:55:44,120 --> 00:55:46,360
Speaker 6: for these two, it's not up to me to decide.

1209
00:55:46,480 --> 00:55:49,120
Speaker 6: And while I take full accountability for bringing all gestures

1210
00:55:49,160 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 6: widely on this myself, I'm at a point where I

1211
00:55:51,120 --> 00:55:53,360
Speaker 6: would very much like to be excluded from this narrative

1212
00:55:53,440 --> 00:55:56,120
Speaker 6: within my actual place of work. All Right, there's a

1213
00:55:56,200 --> 00:55:59,879
Speaker 6: final conclusion and update, So I think final thoughts would

1214
00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:03,640
Speaker 6: be like, you know, it's not part of your team.

1215
00:56:03,920 --> 00:56:05,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, were you done dirty?

1216
00:56:05,760 --> 00:56:05,960
Speaker 1: Yes?

1217
00:56:06,600 --> 00:56:08,680
Speaker 3: But like, I don't think you're gonna get like.

1218
00:56:08,600 --> 00:56:12,520
Speaker 1: The sweet nectar of like justice that you're hoping for home,

1219
00:56:12,560 --> 00:56:13,719
Speaker 1: So it's best to just move on.

1220
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:17,080
Speaker 6: And if, like, if the company knows that you're posting

1221
00:56:17,080 --> 00:56:18,960
Speaker 6: about this on the internet, even if you didn't use

1222
00:56:19,000 --> 00:56:22,200
Speaker 6: any company names, there could be some like reprimand theres like, hey,

1223
00:56:22,239 --> 00:56:24,279
Speaker 6: it got back to us, Like people know it's us.

1224
00:56:24,800 --> 00:56:26,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, that could be that could be pretty bad.

1225
00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:28,920
Speaker 6: As much as we enjoyed reading this, like, it's one

1226
00:56:28,920 --> 00:56:30,840
Speaker 6: of those situations where maybe you should have just like

1227
00:56:31,040 --> 00:56:33,279
Speaker 6: told people you know in person, like, yeah, go off

1228
00:56:33,320 --> 00:56:35,040
Speaker 6: to dinner with them. It's like, yo, you're not gonna

1229
00:56:35,280 --> 00:56:36,400
Speaker 6: believe what happened to me.

1230
00:56:36,640 --> 00:56:38,960
Speaker 1: Or maybe just been a little more low key on

1231
00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:43,960
Speaker 1: the details m M. Maybe not using the actual city.

1232
00:56:44,040 --> 00:56:46,719
Speaker 1: Maybe say you were somewhere else they wanted to go

1233
00:56:46,760 --> 00:56:51,160
Speaker 1: to a museum. Yeah, you could literally say we had

1234
00:56:51,200 --> 00:56:53,879
Speaker 1: a work event in Ottawa, Canada, and now no one

1235
00:56:53,960 --> 00:56:54,960
Speaker 1: knows what's going on.

1236
00:56:55,719 --> 00:56:57,560
Speaker 3: But uh, anyways, let's finish this straight.

1237
00:56:57,760 --> 00:57:01,120
Speaker 6: In conclusion, For everyone who sent comm's in such nice

1238
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:04,480
Speaker 6: supportive messages, thank you sincerely. I did get some good

1239
00:57:04,480 --> 00:57:06,880
Speaker 6: advice and I'm glad I could help you temporarily escape

1240
00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:10,680
Speaker 6: into someone else's work drama, provide hr training material for

1241
00:57:10,719 --> 00:57:14,120
Speaker 6: new employees and travel policies, or maybe validate that whatever

1242
00:57:14,160 --> 00:57:16,320
Speaker 6: you did on your first work trip that creeps into

1243
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:18,600
Speaker 6: your brain when you're trying to fall asleep at night

1244
00:57:19,040 --> 00:57:21,160
Speaker 6: wasn't actually that bad. I took the rest of the

1245
00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:24,040
Speaker 6: week off, which may seem like an overreaction, but sometimes

1246
00:57:24,120 --> 00:57:26,800
Speaker 6: weird stuff impacts you in ways you aren't prepared for.

1247
00:57:27,200 --> 00:57:29,040
Speaker 6: I'm going to use the time to rest, do a

1248
00:57:29,040 --> 00:57:32,600
Speaker 6: bit of reflection, and look at some geriatric Pomeranians.

1249
00:57:33,400 --> 00:57:35,200
Speaker 3: Wait, what what was that last part?

1250
00:57:35,440 --> 00:57:39,560
Speaker 6: Look look at geriatric pomeran like really old Pomeranians. I guess.

1251
00:57:39,640 --> 00:57:43,880
Speaker 6: I guess that's geriatric Pomeranians.

1252
00:57:44,240 --> 00:57:46,760
Speaker 3: Okay, everyone has to have a hobby.

1253
00:57:47,120 --> 00:57:50,000
Speaker 6: I suppose this is an incredibly specific hobby.

1254
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:51,440
Speaker 3: But also kind of cute.

1255
00:57:51,640 --> 00:57:53,880
Speaker 6: Yeah, I guess, So send your dogs and you'd love to.

1256
00:57:54,480 --> 00:57:55,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1257
00:57:55,160 --> 00:57:57,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, geriatric Pomeranians deserve admiration.

1258
00:57:58,560 --> 00:58:02,120
Speaker 6: Disastrous Auce Loot three seventeen said, I never considered look

1259
00:58:02,160 --> 00:58:07,240
Speaker 6: at pictures of geriatric Pomeranians to be particularly grounding, but honestly,

1260
00:58:07,400 --> 00:58:10,960
Speaker 6: that sounds lit. You deserve all good things. Thanks for updating.

1261
00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:13,800
Speaker 1: Oh my god, John here og host. We're gonna get

1262
00:58:13,800 --> 00:58:15,640
Speaker 1: back to these stories, but a quick three minute break

1263
00:58:15,640 --> 00:58:19,240
Speaker 1: from ass for more sponsors. I got reprimanded at work,

1264
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:21,440
Speaker 1: so I quit my job.

1265
00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:26,040
Speaker 3: Too stressed to be pressed? Yeah, too stressed to be pressed.

1266
00:58:26,400 --> 00:58:29,080
Speaker 3: I know what's done is done, but I can't help.

1267
00:58:29,120 --> 00:58:31,240
Speaker 3: But wonder if I made the right decision to quit

1268
00:58:31,320 --> 00:58:33,560
Speaker 3: my job. Was I really the problem? And did I

1269
00:58:33,600 --> 00:58:36,640
Speaker 3: really deserve a verbal? I've been working for this company

1270
00:58:36,680 --> 00:58:39,360
Speaker 3: for one year. It was my anniversary last month. My

1271
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:41,560
Speaker 3: manager gave me a raise and sent me a box

1272
00:58:41,600 --> 00:58:44,160
Speaker 3: tailored to my interest to celebrate my hard work. She

1273
00:58:44,240 --> 00:58:45,960
Speaker 3: seemed pleased with my work.

1274
00:58:46,080 --> 00:58:50,040
Speaker 1: I had no known issues with my manager or team leader.

1275
00:58:50,120 --> 00:58:53,480
Speaker 1: My manager even told our department head that I'm irreplaceable

1276
00:58:53,520 --> 00:58:55,880
Speaker 1: in our department would hurt if I left. During our

1277
00:58:55,920 --> 00:58:58,320
Speaker 1: one on ones, I was always given positive feedback from

1278
00:58:58,320 --> 00:59:01,680
Speaker 1: both of them, never anything negative or items needing correcting.

1279
00:59:01,960 --> 00:59:05,439
Speaker 1: Remember that for later. And by the way, this comes

1280
00:59:05,440 --> 00:59:08,120
Speaker 1: from user fake name four six two on the Charlotte

1281
00:59:08,160 --> 00:59:10,160
Speaker 1: Dobra YouTube subreddit, and if you want to submit your

1282
00:59:10,200 --> 00:59:13,840
Speaker 1: own stories, go to the r slash okay storytime subreddit.

1283
00:59:14,000 --> 00:59:15,280
Speaker 6: Remember that for later too.

1284
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:20,160
Speaker 1: So when I was hired, I was brought on alongside

1285
00:59:20,280 --> 00:59:24,000
Speaker 1: a senior position let's call her Denise. Denise and my

1286
00:59:24,120 --> 00:59:28,200
Speaker 1: manager Kathy worked previously, and she was a direct referral

1287
00:59:28,240 --> 00:59:32,000
Speaker 1: from Kathy. Kathy had nothing but praise for Denise, that

1288
00:59:32,080 --> 00:59:34,600
Speaker 1: she was an amazing worker and always strived to be

1289
00:59:34,680 --> 00:59:35,120
Speaker 1: the best.

1290
00:59:35,280 --> 00:59:37,360
Speaker 3: This sentiment never carried over in her work.

1291
00:59:37,720 --> 00:59:40,760
Speaker 1: In my opinion, she was always behind in numbers, never

1292
00:59:40,840 --> 00:59:43,480
Speaker 1: took the initiative to answer the hard questions or learn

1293
00:59:43,560 --> 00:59:46,000
Speaker 1: new things, even though she was a senior, I was

1294
00:59:46,120 --> 00:59:49,840
Speaker 1: always vall and told to create reporting or training guides

1295
00:59:49,840 --> 00:59:52,560
Speaker 1: for the team. Since I was such a good note taker,

1296
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:55,240
Speaker 1: I didn't have proof that Denise was slacking off until

1297
00:59:55,240 --> 00:59:58,640
Speaker 1: we brought on a junior, James. For three months, Denise's

1298
00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:02,440
Speaker 1: daily numbers were worse than everyone on the team, including his.

1299
01:00:02,880 --> 01:00:06,120
Speaker 1: One day, while James was out sick, I almost lost it.

1300
01:00:06,200 --> 01:00:08,560
Speaker 1: I had done the work of two people while Denise

1301
01:00:08,800 --> 01:00:11,520
Speaker 1: was nowhere to be seen. I finally brought things up

1302
01:00:11,560 --> 01:00:14,400
Speaker 1: to my team lead. My team lead agreed with what

1303
01:00:14,480 --> 01:00:17,200
Speaker 1: I was seeing, but also didn't have proof to bring

1304
01:00:17,200 --> 01:00:20,240
Speaker 1: it up to Kathy. We both worried about retaliation because

1305
01:00:20,280 --> 01:00:22,960
Speaker 1: she was friends with Denise. During a one on one,

1306
01:00:23,000 --> 01:00:26,400
Speaker 1: I advised Kathy I didn't need the job and addressed

1307
01:00:26,480 --> 01:00:29,480
Speaker 1: all of the inequalities in how our work is distributed.

1308
01:00:29,640 --> 01:00:31,919
Speaker 1: We talked about how there was no difference in job

1309
01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:34,840
Speaker 1: duties between a senior and I, while a junior's duties

1310
01:00:34,880 --> 01:00:37,000
Speaker 1: are tasks that require less risk.

1311
01:00:37,000 --> 01:00:39,760
Speaker 3: And nuance to complete. Why get paid more than everyone

1312
01:00:39,760 --> 01:00:42,520
Speaker 3: else but do the least amount of work. I didn't

1313
01:00:42,560 --> 01:00:45,080
Speaker 3: want to be a senior either. I just wanted Denise

1314
01:00:45,520 --> 01:00:48,800
Speaker 3: to do the work she is paid to do. She

1315
01:00:48,920 --> 01:00:50,760
Speaker 3: advised she would talk to Denise.

1316
01:00:50,960 --> 01:00:54,680
Speaker 1: After Kathy talked to Denise, Denise called me crying, upset

1317
01:00:54,720 --> 01:00:57,240
Speaker 1: that I said something and said she was going through

1318
01:00:57,240 --> 01:01:00,120
Speaker 1: a lot with her father in the hospital. Okay, is

1319
01:01:00,120 --> 01:01:02,600
Speaker 1: it fair to have your work impacted by that? Yes,

1320
01:01:02,880 --> 01:01:05,600
Speaker 1: people should know about it already. The relevant parties should

1321
01:01:05,640 --> 01:01:08,000
Speaker 1: know about it. Not that op is necessarily one of them.

1322
01:01:08,040 --> 01:01:10,800
Speaker 6: No, But it's also like, if you're going through something

1323
01:01:10,880 --> 01:01:14,480
Speaker 6: like that, then you need to take time away to

1324
01:01:14,640 --> 01:01:17,560
Speaker 6: deal with it and not just like try to skatee

1325
01:01:17,560 --> 01:01:20,400
Speaker 6: by and juggle everything. Because as we are clearly seeing

1326
01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:23,960
Speaker 6: it's affecting the work, it's affecting everyone else. Like I'm

1327
01:01:24,080 --> 01:01:27,240
Speaker 6: sure that if this had been something that was coordinated,

1328
01:01:27,280 --> 01:01:29,640
Speaker 6: like they don't need to know every detail about like

1329
01:01:30,160 --> 01:01:33,479
Speaker 6: the father's illness and everything, but just like, hey, there's

1330
01:01:33,480 --> 01:01:36,480
Speaker 6: a personal family thing I'm going through right now, I'm

1331
01:01:36,520 --> 01:01:38,560
Speaker 6: going to just take a step back a little bit

1332
01:01:39,000 --> 01:01:41,880
Speaker 6: and deal with this. But also, like it doesn't seem

1333
01:01:41,960 --> 01:01:45,120
Speaker 6: like this is just because of that, but Denise, it's

1334
01:01:45,120 --> 01:01:49,080
Speaker 6: a pattern, and Denise is probably using this to justify

1335
01:01:49,560 --> 01:01:51,640
Speaker 6: what their their work ethic is.

1336
01:01:51,840 --> 01:01:54,760
Speaker 1: I am a little suspicious, not that she's outright lying,

1337
01:01:54,840 --> 01:01:57,520
Speaker 1: but like you know, it's the classic move of like

1338
01:01:57,640 --> 01:02:00,360
Speaker 1: I've worked in sales before, your grandma, I was not

1339
01:02:00,480 --> 01:02:02,760
Speaker 1: sick all that. You know, you only got so many

1340
01:02:02,800 --> 01:02:04,880
Speaker 1: relatives whose funeral you have to go to at the

1341
01:02:04,960 --> 01:02:07,280
Speaker 1: last minute, you know, unless you're just on a real

1342
01:02:07,440 --> 01:02:10,960
Speaker 1: bad string of bad luck. But anyway, and that I

1343
01:02:10,960 --> 01:02:13,640
Speaker 1: should be more understanding, and she's doing the best she can.

1344
01:02:13,800 --> 01:02:16,520
Speaker 1: Kathy made several accommodations for Denise to help her hit

1345
01:02:16,520 --> 01:02:19,280
Speaker 1: her numbers, including moving James's hours to give her more

1346
01:02:19,320 --> 01:02:22,000
Speaker 1: time alone to grab work. Her excuse was, I was

1347
01:02:22,040 --> 01:02:24,800
Speaker 1: being a martyr and just taking all of the files

1348
01:02:24,840 --> 01:02:28,040
Speaker 1: before she could, and I'm just too fast. After months

1349
01:02:28,120 --> 01:02:30,840
Speaker 1: of no change and continuing to get burnt out and stressed,

1350
01:02:30,920 --> 01:02:33,720
Speaker 1: Kathy advised I should slow down and step away after

1351
01:02:33,760 --> 01:02:36,120
Speaker 1: I hit a specific number of files so they can

1352
01:02:36,160 --> 01:02:36,600
Speaker 1: catch up.

1353
01:02:36,640 --> 01:02:39,160
Speaker 3: Once they've caught up, I can remain my normal speed.

1354
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:41,920
Speaker 1: I never really implemented this because I would stress out

1355
01:02:41,920 --> 01:02:44,240
Speaker 1: when our work piled up and no one stepped in

1356
01:02:44,320 --> 01:02:46,680
Speaker 1: to work it. I wasn't going as fast, but I

1357
01:02:46,760 --> 01:02:48,560
Speaker 1: never stepped away from my desk unless it was for

1358
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:51,640
Speaker 1: a break. I take work from home very seriously. It

1359
01:02:51,720 --> 01:02:53,720
Speaker 1: is a privilege I don't take for granted, so I

1360
01:02:53,800 --> 01:02:56,280
Speaker 1: make sure I'm present during work hours. I just let

1361
01:02:56,320 --> 01:02:59,040
Speaker 1: things be because, yes, the workload was stressful, the work

1362
01:02:59,080 --> 01:03:02,360
Speaker 1: itself isn't overly taxing. It's what I've done for over

1363
01:03:02,440 --> 01:03:05,200
Speaker 1: a decade as a career, so it's second hand at

1364
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:08,080
Speaker 1: this point. However, this month I made it a point

1365
01:03:08,120 --> 01:03:10,720
Speaker 1: to actually implement what Kathy and my team lead told

1366
01:03:10,760 --> 01:03:13,240
Speaker 1: me to do. Last month, I went to the er

1367
01:03:13,480 --> 01:03:17,200
Speaker 1: for weird heart palpitations. Whenever I ate, we found out

1368
01:03:17,240 --> 01:03:22,160
Speaker 1: I had hypothyroidism and a possible nodule costing gastoporiasis. I

1369
01:03:22,240 --> 01:03:24,919
Speaker 1: had so many health issues suddenly pop up this year

1370
01:03:24,960 --> 01:03:28,040
Speaker 1: that I couldn't explain before the er and primary care

1371
01:03:28,080 --> 01:03:32,640
Speaker 1: practitioner visit. I never realized the sleepless nights, hives, sudden allergies,

1372
01:03:32,800 --> 01:03:36,120
Speaker 1: extreme fatigue, the hair loss, the dry skin, nausea, weight gain,

1373
01:03:36,600 --> 01:03:40,160
Speaker 1: daily headaches were all because of the stress from this job.

1374
01:03:40,360 --> 01:03:43,640
Speaker 1: That is way too much to go through over this job.

1375
01:03:43,680 --> 01:03:47,160
Speaker 1: You could get a job somewhere else. Clearly, you've been

1376
01:03:47,160 --> 01:03:50,280
Speaker 1: doing this for ten years, right your superiors are saying

1377
01:03:50,320 --> 01:03:53,240
Speaker 1: you work too fast for them to do their work.

1378
01:03:53,480 --> 01:03:57,320
Speaker 1: So you could probably find yourself in a great position somewhere.

1379
01:03:57,040 --> 01:04:00,280
Speaker 6: Else in this instance, especially where they're saying that OP

1380
01:04:00,680 --> 01:04:04,760
Speaker 6: is like as a wonder kind and that if they left,

1381
01:04:04,960 --> 01:04:07,680
Speaker 6: the whole company would suffer. Yeah, you can walk away

1382
01:04:07,680 --> 01:04:09,320
Speaker 6: at any point and find a better company.

1383
01:04:09,480 --> 01:04:12,400
Speaker 1: You can go and demand, hey, if you want me

1384
01:04:12,480 --> 01:04:15,560
Speaker 1: to stay, X, Y, and Z is happening, and if

1385
01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:18,840
Speaker 1: it's not, I'm walking away. But you know we already

1386
01:04:18,920 --> 01:04:22,800
Speaker 1: know OPE quit their job. It's just a matter of Yeah.

1387
01:04:22,880 --> 01:04:25,440
Speaker 1: At this point, I'm sure you were starting to realize

1388
01:04:25,840 --> 01:04:29,640
Speaker 1: I don't need this. Actually, it was like ten different

1389
01:04:29,680 --> 01:04:32,880
Speaker 1: health complications you were experiencing because of just stress from

1390
01:04:32,880 --> 01:04:35,880
Speaker 1: your job. My fiance begged me to pull back for

1391
01:04:35,920 --> 01:04:38,880
Speaker 1: the sake of my health, so I did. Whenever I

1392
01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:42,440
Speaker 1: hit that specific number, I stepped away from the files

1393
01:04:42,560 --> 01:04:45,480
Speaker 1: and did other work. I focused on pipeline reports and

1394
01:04:45,520 --> 01:04:48,520
Speaker 1: cleaning up old or follow up work. I still kept

1395
01:04:48,520 --> 01:04:51,280
Speaker 1: my numbers up, but they were no longer insanely unequal.

1396
01:04:51,320 --> 01:04:53,880
Speaker 1: Our numbers were not off by like ten or even

1397
01:04:54,040 --> 01:04:59,160
Speaker 1: thirty files. I'm talking hundreds almost every day. By eleven am,

1398
01:04:59,240 --> 01:05:01,400
Speaker 1: I had hit that specific number, which is a whole

1399
01:05:01,520 --> 01:05:04,600
Speaker 1: day's worth of work. My coworkers were only at twenty.

1400
01:05:04,720 --> 01:05:06,880
Speaker 1: I started sending my team lead a screenshot of our

1401
01:05:06,960 --> 01:05:09,640
Speaker 1: numbers and advising I was doing other work. When I

1402
01:05:09,680 --> 01:05:12,479
Speaker 1: finally stepped away this month, I went to only being

1403
01:05:12,520 --> 01:05:16,160
Speaker 1: ahead of my coworkers by eighty or sixty files instead

1404
01:05:16,200 --> 01:05:19,280
Speaker 1: of one hundred and twenty to one hundred and fifty. Honestly,

1405
01:05:19,400 --> 01:05:21,720
Speaker 1: with all of my health concerns, I felt checked out.

1406
01:05:21,760 --> 01:05:24,240
Speaker 1: I was no longer going above and beyond and stressing

1407
01:05:24,320 --> 01:05:28,280
Speaker 1: myself out for my coworkers. I wasn't volunteering for special projects,

1408
01:05:28,480 --> 01:05:30,760
Speaker 1: and I started pushing back when they started assigning me

1409
01:05:30,840 --> 01:05:33,920
Speaker 1: extra work because I wasn't working files while my coworkers

1410
01:05:33,920 --> 01:05:36,680
Speaker 1: caught up. I advised them I shouldn't be punished with

1411
01:05:36,800 --> 01:05:40,240
Speaker 1: more work because my coworkers can't work at my pace.

1412
01:05:40,480 --> 01:05:42,120
Speaker 1: It all came to a head when I missed an

1413
01:05:42,120 --> 01:05:44,960
Speaker 1: email last week and my manager got upset with me.

1414
01:05:45,160 --> 01:05:48,600
Speaker 1: She asked what happened. I advised, I missed the email.

1415
01:05:48,720 --> 01:05:50,840
Speaker 1: We don't work via email, and our team lead and

1416
01:05:50,960 --> 01:05:54,760
Speaker 1: senior monitor on it, so I'm not consistently checking them.

1417
01:05:54,840 --> 01:05:57,040
Speaker 1: We got a ton of We get a ton of

1418
01:05:57,160 --> 01:06:00,520
Speaker 1: BS emails that end up being deleted every day. To

1419
01:06:00,600 --> 01:06:02,920
Speaker 1: my knowledge, this is the first time I've missed an

1420
01:06:02,960 --> 01:06:06,120
Speaker 1: email and the first issue they've had with me. She

1421
01:06:06,200 --> 01:06:08,160
Speaker 1: asked what we can do so I don't miss something

1422
01:06:08,200 --> 01:06:11,320
Speaker 1: like this again. I requested that if management sees I

1423
01:06:11,480 --> 01:06:15,160
Speaker 1: haven't responded, a ping in the chat would be helpful.

1424
01:06:15,240 --> 01:06:17,560
Speaker 1: I'm not avoiding the work. I just didn't see it.

1425
01:06:17,680 --> 01:06:20,200
Speaker 1: She responded that it wasn't their job to do that

1426
01:06:20,640 --> 01:06:22,960
Speaker 1: and to not let it happen again. Ooh, you know

1427
01:06:23,040 --> 01:06:25,360
Speaker 1: how fast I would have said, well, it's not my

1428
01:06:25,560 --> 01:06:30,320
Speaker 1: job to do Cheryl's workload or Denise's workload. But guess

1429
01:06:30,360 --> 01:06:33,120
Speaker 1: who's been doing it all this time? What I was

1430
01:06:33,160 --> 01:06:36,640
Speaker 1: literally told I work so effectively that I have to

1431
01:06:36,720 --> 01:06:40,080
Speaker 1: slow down to give other people work to do. So

1432
01:06:40,800 --> 01:06:41,600
Speaker 1: what is this?

1433
01:06:41,960 --> 01:06:46,000
Speaker 6: And it's like you missed one email and the fact

1434
01:06:46,040 --> 01:06:50,760
Speaker 6: that the company doesn't normally communicate via email, it's incredibly

1435
01:06:50,840 --> 01:06:54,000
Speaker 6: weird that they're being so angry about this one email

1436
01:06:54,080 --> 01:06:57,720
Speaker 6: that was sent when they get, as Opie stated, so

1437
01:06:57,840 --> 01:07:00,920
Speaker 6: many bogus emails in a day and they all get deleted.

1438
01:07:01,000 --> 01:07:04,280
Speaker 6: So also, if you're doing your work and you're working

1439
01:07:04,320 --> 01:07:07,040
Speaker 6: that far ahead. It's very easy to miss an email

1440
01:07:07,160 --> 01:07:07,680
Speaker 6: or something.

1441
01:07:07,840 --> 01:07:09,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just a.

1442
01:07:09,080 --> 01:07:12,000
Speaker 1: Crazy thing to say. Don't let it happen again. It's like, dude,

1443
01:07:12,120 --> 01:07:15,040
Speaker 1: you're talking to the rock star like, have a little respect.

1444
01:07:15,360 --> 01:07:18,440
Speaker 1: So the next day I have our one on one chat.

1445
01:07:18,480 --> 01:07:20,720
Speaker 1: Before our one on one, we have our morning huddle.

1446
01:07:20,800 --> 01:07:23,000
Speaker 1: I'm upset still from the previous day, so I'm not

1447
01:07:23,040 --> 01:07:25,680
Speaker 1: happy and smiling like normal. I can't be fake.

1448
01:07:26,120 --> 01:07:29,120
Speaker 3: I'm just not a fake person. I'm not rude. I'm

1449
01:07:29,160 --> 01:07:29,840
Speaker 3: just being quiet.

1450
01:07:29,880 --> 01:07:32,480
Speaker 1: I say hello when Kathy addresses me and mute myself

1451
01:07:32,520 --> 01:07:34,560
Speaker 1: while I get back to work. During our huddle, our

1452
01:07:34,600 --> 01:07:37,960
Speaker 1: newest hire is having trouble catching on, so Kathy suggested

1453
01:07:38,000 --> 01:07:40,520
Speaker 1: we put our notes on a collaborative Excel sheet for her.

1454
01:07:40,600 --> 01:07:43,200
Speaker 1: She then addressed me and says, quote, you have notes,

1455
01:07:43,240 --> 01:07:45,919
Speaker 1: don't you. You're always such a good note taker. I'm

1456
01:07:46,000 --> 01:07:48,760
Speaker 1: furious because when James was hired, I was asked to

1457
01:07:48,800 --> 01:07:51,439
Speaker 1: add my notes to the same Excel sheet. They were

1458
01:07:51,440 --> 01:07:54,520
Speaker 1: deleted by Kathy months ago in favor of a different

1459
01:07:54,560 --> 01:07:57,560
Speaker 1: tab for notes. Instead of getting angry and going off,

1460
01:07:57,600 --> 01:07:59,520
Speaker 1: I just shook my head yes to her question. She

1461
01:07:59,560 --> 01:08:03,080
Speaker 1: then got up set and ended our huddle right there. Unprofessional?

1462
01:08:03,320 --> 01:08:05,400
Speaker 6: Wait, why is she upset because.

1463
01:08:05,120 --> 01:08:09,760
Speaker 1: She's unprofessional, Matt, because she cannot handle her business. Let's

1464
01:08:10,040 --> 01:08:12,640
Speaker 1: keep on work. We're right at the climax. I feel

1465
01:08:12,680 --> 01:08:14,720
Speaker 1: like I knew our one on one was going to

1466
01:08:14,720 --> 01:08:17,400
Speaker 1: be heated, but I felt like she would understand. I'm

1467
01:08:17,439 --> 01:08:19,679
Speaker 1: just burnt out. I'm tired of having to be perfect

1468
01:08:19,680 --> 01:08:22,479
Speaker 1: and step up while my coworkers continue to get by

1469
01:08:22,560 --> 01:08:25,479
Speaker 1: with mediocrity. I was so tired of how unfair the

1470
01:08:25,479 --> 01:08:28,479
Speaker 1: workload was. We get on the call and immediately she

1471
01:08:28,600 --> 01:08:32,000
Speaker 1: starts recording. She's reading off a screen of notes. She

1472
01:08:32,080 --> 01:08:35,000
Speaker 1: asked that I don't speak until she's addressed everything with me,

1473
01:08:35,439 --> 01:08:37,920
Speaker 1: that she is putting me on a verbal She goes

1474
01:08:37,960 --> 01:08:40,880
Speaker 1: on about missing the email, she didn't like that I

1475
01:08:40,920 --> 01:08:43,479
Speaker 1: didn't say sorry, and that it's not management's job to

1476
01:08:43,520 --> 01:08:46,120
Speaker 1: follow up if I'm late responding, that I'm not a

1477
01:08:46,160 --> 01:08:49,479
Speaker 1: team player because I didn't volunteer my weekends because suddenly

1478
01:08:49,520 --> 01:08:51,880
Speaker 1: they want to be open twenty four to seven, that

1479
01:08:51,920 --> 01:08:53,920
Speaker 1: I didn't give her my notes when she asked me

1480
01:08:53,960 --> 01:08:56,559
Speaker 1: for them, and finally that she and the team lead

1481
01:08:56,640 --> 01:08:59,040
Speaker 1: looked at all the work and she felt it was equitable,

1482
01:08:59,160 --> 01:09:00,880
Speaker 1: and that I need to stop sending my team lead

1483
01:09:00,880 --> 01:09:03,160
Speaker 1: screenshots of our numbers, that I need to stop talking

1484
01:09:03,240 --> 01:09:06,200
Speaker 1: about Denise or bringing up numbers to them. Keep in mind,

1485
01:09:06,240 --> 01:09:09,920
Speaker 1: oh P was told explicitly to bring her numbers down

1486
01:09:10,360 --> 01:09:13,200
Speaker 1: and only do what is asked slash required of her

1487
01:09:13,240 --> 01:09:15,719
Speaker 1: every day, that they never allowed me to step away

1488
01:09:15,720 --> 01:09:18,400
Speaker 1: from work when I hit a specific number. I remained

1489
01:09:18,400 --> 01:09:21,400
Speaker 1: calm and quiet during the verbal. I did not agree

1490
01:09:21,520 --> 01:09:25,639
Speaker 1: that any of that deserved formal action and were lies. Instead,

1491
01:09:26,000 --> 01:09:28,240
Speaker 1: she should be asking why the person she just told

1492
01:09:28,240 --> 01:09:31,760
Speaker 1: our department head was irreplaceable is suddenly pulling back. I

1493
01:09:31,840 --> 01:09:34,519
Speaker 1: felt so gas lit. It all felt so sudden and

1494
01:09:34,600 --> 01:09:37,160
Speaker 1: so extreme. I have never done poorly in my work,

1495
01:09:37,200 --> 01:09:39,960
Speaker 1: and I am still doing the work, just at the

1496
01:09:39,960 --> 01:09:43,240
Speaker 1: same level as my coworkers. I felt so hurt and betrayed.

1497
01:09:43,600 --> 01:09:47,120
Speaker 1: It all felt like retaliation for saying anything about Denise.

1498
01:09:47,720 --> 01:09:50,120
Speaker 1: I wasn't going to fight Kathy about it. She seemed

1499
01:09:50,120 --> 01:09:52,000
Speaker 1: to have made up her mind. I felt like I

1500
01:09:52,000 --> 01:09:54,600
Speaker 1: could either take the verbal but always be scared and

1501
01:09:54,640 --> 01:09:56,960
Speaker 1: stressed to make a mistake, and that if I upset

1502
01:09:57,000 --> 01:09:59,439
Speaker 1: Kathy in any way, or if I'm not happy and smiley,

1503
01:09:59,479 --> 01:10:01,960
Speaker 1: she would conte and you to take formal action instead,

1504
01:10:02,080 --> 01:10:05,200
Speaker 1: I calmly gave her my two week notice. I advised

1505
01:10:05,240 --> 01:10:07,080
Speaker 1: I could try longer if they need the time to

1506
01:10:07,160 --> 01:10:10,280
Speaker 1: hire and train my replacement. Kathy looked shocked and asked

1507
01:10:10,280 --> 01:10:12,960
Speaker 1: if I was sure. I said yes, and she asked

1508
01:10:13,000 --> 01:10:15,800
Speaker 1: I send the letter after the call. But man, it's

1509
01:10:15,800 --> 01:10:19,480
Speaker 1: a classic case of like, once you become the workhorse,

1510
01:10:19,640 --> 01:10:22,360
Speaker 1: or you work at a certain pace, even if it's

1511
01:10:22,360 --> 01:10:24,880
Speaker 1: like above, you work above and beyond, and they do

1512
01:10:25,000 --> 01:10:27,519
Speaker 1: nothing to like compensate you for it, other than just

1513
01:10:27,960 --> 01:10:30,120
Speaker 1: giving you more work and expecting more of you.

1514
01:10:30,640 --> 01:10:34,559
Speaker 6: It's like the idea of you under promise and over

1515
01:10:34,640 --> 01:10:38,880
Speaker 6: deliver sometimes but even then, like it's good for optics

1516
01:10:38,920 --> 01:10:41,680
Speaker 6: with clients when you do that sometimes, but then they

1517
01:10:41,760 --> 01:10:43,439
Speaker 6: just kind of expecting you too, to go above and

1518
01:10:43,439 --> 01:10:46,720
Speaker 6: beyond every time. Yeah, and it becomes an expectation, and

1519
01:10:46,800 --> 01:10:49,519
Speaker 6: it just becomes this vicious cycle where if you're not

1520
01:10:49,840 --> 01:10:53,040
Speaker 6: absolutely wiling them, if you're only giving them what they

1521
01:10:53,240 --> 01:10:57,760
Speaker 6: ask of you the first time, then you're suddenly slacking

1522
01:10:57,880 --> 01:11:01,639
Speaker 6: even though you are delivering exactly what was promised.

1523
01:11:01,760 --> 01:11:06,920
Speaker 1: Right, I'm working within the exact parameters of my working description,

1524
01:11:07,200 --> 01:11:09,800
Speaker 1: like shouldn't that make you go, wait, what are we doing?

1525
01:11:09,960 --> 01:11:10,080
Speaker 6: Like?

1526
01:11:10,120 --> 01:11:11,920
Speaker 1: And by the way, she was told to do that. Yeah,

1527
01:11:11,960 --> 01:11:15,680
Speaker 1: so it's just insane. So it's just crazy. Let's see

1528
01:11:15,720 --> 01:11:18,160
Speaker 1: how this ends. I started to write my two week

1529
01:11:18,240 --> 01:11:21,280
Speaker 1: notice up and sent screenshots backing up my side of things.

1530
01:11:21,640 --> 01:11:23,519
Speaker 3: I was about to send it to hr in our.

1531
01:11:23,439 --> 01:11:26,880
Speaker 1: Department head when she revoked my access and told me

1532
01:11:26,960 --> 01:11:30,680
Speaker 1: I was terminated. Immediately. My team lead was shocked. She

1533
01:11:30,720 --> 01:11:33,240
Speaker 1: said it all happened so quickly, she didn't know. Kathy

1534
01:11:33,360 --> 01:11:35,000
Speaker 1: was going to give me a verbal that she didn't

1535
01:11:35,040 --> 01:11:37,200
Speaker 1: think it was handled correctly and that she was sorry.

1536
01:11:37,479 --> 01:11:39,599
Speaker 1: I was on the receiving end of things. So did

1537
01:11:39,640 --> 01:11:41,840
Speaker 1: I make the right decision to leave? Was Kathy being

1538
01:11:41,880 --> 01:11:43,679
Speaker 1: toxic and trying to shut me up about Denise?

1539
01:11:43,840 --> 01:11:44,240
Speaker 3: I do know.

1540
01:11:44,280 --> 01:11:47,000
Speaker 1: Ever since quitting, I've slept through the night every night.

1541
01:11:47,120 --> 01:11:47,960
Speaker 1: Am I the A hole?

1542
01:11:48,160 --> 01:11:48,320
Speaker 9: No?

1543
01:11:48,479 --> 01:11:50,200
Speaker 1: And I bet you you could get some kind of

1544
01:11:50,240 --> 01:11:52,560
Speaker 1: like I don't know if that's wrongful termination.

1545
01:11:52,479 --> 01:11:54,760
Speaker 6: Right about to say, with all those numbers, with all

1546
01:11:54,800 --> 01:11:58,519
Speaker 6: those chats, if you saved any of them? That I'm

1547
01:11:58,560 --> 01:12:02,920
Speaker 6: guessing using my limited legal brain from mock trial and

1548
01:12:03,000 --> 01:12:06,080
Speaker 6: watching Judge Judy a lot with my mom growing up.

1549
01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:09,600
Speaker 6: You could probably argue that it was retaliatory.

1550
01:12:09,880 --> 01:12:10,200
Speaker 1: Yeah,