Speaker 1: The nick A Gliser Podcast. Nick Glaser pos, here's Nikki.
Speaker 2: Hello here, I am welcome to the show.
Speaker 1: It's Nicky Glazer Podcast. Excuse me while I put on
Speaker 1: my lip gloss, which all the gen zs are wearing.
Speaker 2: Oh wait, I have mine too.
Speaker 1: They can't go anywhere without it?
Speaker 3: Is that a gen Z thing?
Speaker 1: That is what I'm told by gen z M. I
Speaker 1: put it on my Instagram story this week that gen
Speaker 1: ZM had written to me that like, one thing to
Speaker 1: know about hold on, let me read in her voice,
Speaker 1: one thing to know about gen Z. So I gotta
Speaker 1: find it. I just am She's hilarious to me. People
Speaker 1: are starting My friends are starting to be like, you
Speaker 1: have to check with her about everything you buy. And
Speaker 1: I'm like no, It's not like I'm like, won't get
Speaker 1: something because she says no. I just it's funny to
Speaker 1: get her confirmation. It's content. It's it's giving, like fun
Speaker 1: relationship between two people from different generations who just want
Speaker 1: to understand each other. I am not an old person
Speaker 1: totally right. I am not a millennial who's like mad
Speaker 1: about gen Z. I think that is such a late
Speaker 1: I'm like working on a bit about it in my
Speaker 1: act about how like every generation like hates the younger
Speaker 1: generation because they're jealous you're young, but they can't say that,
Speaker 1: so they make fun of how you talk and what
Speaker 1: you wear because we hate that our skin looks gross
Speaker 1: and yours doesn't, and that we're closer to dying than
Speaker 1: you are, but we can't say that because it's embarrassing
Speaker 1: to admit that that's the real fear. And we get
Speaker 1: mad at you and that you have you have a
Speaker 1: life that you can you can do so many things
Speaker 1: we didn't do, you know, like we blew past opportunities
Speaker 1: to socialize and go out and maybe meet people, or
Speaker 1: like maybe there's said gen zs are single and we're
Speaker 1: stuck in marriages we don't like, so instead we just
Speaker 1: go like what they talk in this weird? Why are
Speaker 1: they talking that we didn't talk like that? Like A
Speaker 1: good point was raised in My Girls Chat that Sara
Speaker 1: Lena said that millennials did not have as many different
Speaker 1: slang words as gen Z did when we were the
Speaker 1: reigning young.
Speaker 3: General those days. I feel like we did have a
Speaker 3: good amount, but maybe not as much.
Speaker 1: You remind me of something, because I don't think we
Speaker 1: had that many kal Bunga was X. Gen X, rad
Speaker 1: was gen X, Tubular was gen X as if for
Speaker 1: groovy groovy was was co opted retro actively like rams, Yeah,
Speaker 1: so you're struggling. We did, We didn't really have it,
Speaker 1: but anyway, So another gen Z thing. We never go
Speaker 1: anywhere without a gloss in hand, bathroom car, another country.
Speaker 1: Lip gloss, but a bomb gloss, but a balm glass.
Speaker 1: We love. Summer Fridays and Lenash, those are the two brands.
Speaker 1: And I gotta says, is with the finger like, I
Speaker 1: guess it's less of a no, so it's like the tube.
Speaker 1: It comes in like less of a like, like you
Speaker 1: take it out and it's a wand and more of like.
Speaker 1: I don't know what she meant by a bomb. I
Speaker 1: could ask, but you know, she might get back to
Speaker 1: me even before I ask, because that's how fast she is,
Speaker 1: so it might take less than it might take negative
Speaker 1: time to find out. So I don't know if we
Speaker 1: want to go there, But I think what she meant
Speaker 1: is like a goo like it comes out like gooey.
Speaker 1: So I got I got Tower twenty eight or whatever
Speaker 1: that brand is Lenege and Summer Fridays, and I gotta
Speaker 1: admit they taste really delicious and because you do end
Speaker 1: up eating.
Speaker 3: Them and the wan I've always said, if I could
Speaker 3: eat my makeup, I'd probably use it more often.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you do eat it, you absorb it in
Speaker 1: your skin and you eat whatever is on your lips
Speaker 1: is transferred into your body.
Speaker 3: But when you go camping, you're supposed to bring like
Speaker 3: five gallons of water and like six lip glosses just
Speaker 3: in case you get.
Speaker 1: Lost in the large and in case there's a photo
Speaker 1: shoot that you come across with.
Speaker 3: Well, that's you know what. The the the the sign
Speaker 3: of good slang is that it becomes just like normal language.
Speaker 3: And I think a lot of the millennial things that
Speaker 3: we considered that we consider them normal now, but they're
Speaker 3: actually slang. Okay, Like you know, like the word cool,
Speaker 3: like that's cool was slang once for like like the
Speaker 3: silent I don't know who said it, but yeah, some generation,
Speaker 3: like the Silent generation came back from World War One
Speaker 3: and was like radio, that's pretty cool, and everyone else
Speaker 3: before them were like cool, that's like idiotic. Yeah, it's
Speaker 3: just like in the in the But here's some millennial words.
Speaker 1: That I did see a water container in a gym
Speaker 1: today or the other day that said hot these are
Speaker 1: options hot, cold, cool? Okay, what do you make of that?
Speaker 3: It's a little too much like it was a container, like.
Speaker 1: You know, it was like a big if you know,
Speaker 1: the kind of thing that you talk around in the
Speaker 1: office and you talk about the latest episode of Friends
Speaker 1: the other night.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, okay, what water cooler? Yes, I could get hot, cold,
Speaker 3: and cool.
Speaker 1: I took a picture of it because I was so
Speaker 1: confounded by the options. I understand cool and cold are
Speaker 1: two different things. I think cool was supposed to be
Speaker 1: in the in the middle. But maybe your water comes
Speaker 1: out wearing sunglasses.
Speaker 3: And I mean that seems really uh specific.
Speaker 1: I thought you would like that, Okay, So.
Speaker 3: I just I think I don't think I would. I
Speaker 3: think cool is probably room tamp Yeah, I just don't.
Speaker 3: I don't like it because I think it's too many options.
Speaker 3: I don't believe that cool is actually anything.
Speaker 1: And who is hot water in a gym?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: That's cuban because it says it's probably good for you
Speaker 1: to do. If you want to know what's good for you,
Speaker 1: do what doesn't feel good all the time?
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: By Andrew Human stare into the sun as soon as
Speaker 1: you get up in the morning, take a cold plunge, uh,
Speaker 1: sit in silence, go on a what's it called. There's
Speaker 1: some kind of walk he talks about where you have
Speaker 1: to look across the lands, so you're if you're ever
Speaker 1: seeing a guy walking around your neighborhood slowly scanning the
Speaker 1: horizon back and forth with his neck. He's not a PERV.
Speaker 1: He listens to and of humorous podcast and also might
Speaker 1: be a PERF and it just fits the protocol. But
Speaker 1: I was listening to like what you have to do
Speaker 1: in the morning to feel good? Your best buy his protocol,
Speaker 1: which isn't it's not insane, but you do have to
Speaker 1: stare at the sun for fifteen minutes in the morning.
Speaker 3: He really, he says, stare at the sun.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you need to get sunlight in your eyes.
Speaker 2: You need Yeah, you were sunglasses. You have to go
Speaker 2: outside and.
Speaker 3: Just science told us that that's bad for you for
Speaker 3: like a thousand years.
Speaker 1: Yeah, even on the clips, get it in. Get it in.
Speaker 1: You'll be blind, but you'll feeling Are you serious, No,
Speaker 1: it's totally true. But listen, Okay, after you read us
Speaker 1: millennial phrases, look Andrew Huberman Protocol for your daily life.
Speaker 1: But I do want to hear millennial phrases because here's
Speaker 1: the thing. You're right, they do become a part of
Speaker 1: the way we talk. And that is why I'm obsessed
Speaker 1: with gen z phrases, is because I think some of
Speaker 1: them are fucking awesome. And as soon as they inject
Speaker 1: themselves in my brain in a way that becomes like
Speaker 1: I don't have to think that I'm doing it. I'm
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be set to describe so many new things.
Speaker 1: For instance, like this new thing of like saying dead dead,
Speaker 1: I'm deceased, call Tyler Henry, like get seven of my
Speaker 1: friends to carry me into a grave like that, just
Speaker 1: like those different versions of saying you are passed on.
Speaker 1: I like it. I like it, and I think, oh,
Speaker 1: Tyler Henry, Yeah, we can definitely talk about that. Okay,
Speaker 1: So run us through.
Speaker 3: Okay. So here's just the let so I found on
Speaker 3: the internet.
Speaker 1: And by the way, we're old millennials, or at least
Speaker 1: I am, Brian, You're a few years younger old. I'm
Speaker 1: the oldest. Oh yeah, you're the oldest. Okay, So these
Speaker 1: might seem be gay bae b a e like, oh bane,
Speaker 1: Yeah that that actually was good? Good job. Yeah, stands for.
Speaker 3: Well I see it.
Speaker 1: I no, actually no before anyone else.
Speaker 3: Okay, that sucks.
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah all right basic basic Okay, yes, very good.
Speaker 1: Love Basic. Really what a great word. That didn't have
Speaker 1: a way to describe that before. I guess you could
Speaker 1: say cub but no, basic is lame, boring, pedestrian. But
Speaker 1: basic is just really uh yeah.
Speaker 3: That enapsulates what we what we want to say. It's
Speaker 3: because it has a little bit of an insult attached
Speaker 3: to it. Yeah, yes, something's basic. It's yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no one wants that. Adulting uh huh Okay, don't
Speaker 1: love it, but it definitely adding in to the two
Speaker 1: words two nouns. Yeah, became a thing that we did adulting.
Speaker 1: I hated it. I always have. I don't know why,
Speaker 1: and anyone who uses it that's fine. But yeah. I
Speaker 1: was this year's old when I found out whatever that
Speaker 1: one really your table.
Speaker 3: A lot of our slang came from Twitter.
Speaker 1: We all like started yeah, and.
Speaker 3: I think gen Z is probably getting theirs from the
Speaker 3: internet as well.
Speaker 1: What they're doing is they're getting it from TV and
Speaker 1: different tiktoks. So like the one I was telling the
Speaker 1: girls chat about the other day was a so I saw.
Speaker 1: I was listening to lost culture. He says, the latest
Speaker 1: episode with these girls that have a podcast called the Haters,
Speaker 1: and that's going to be a new podcast I listened
Speaker 1: to understand gen z culture. They were dropping. It was
Speaker 1: like I was listening to a foreign language. It was
Speaker 1: like when your teacher used to play you like French
Speaker 1: tapes and you would have to like listen during class
Speaker 1: and like take a test. I was like glued to
Speaker 1: the audio trying to decipher things because every other word
Speaker 1: was something new. So at one point they said they
Speaker 1: were talking about old feuds in pop stars or between
Speaker 1: pop stars, and they said, Nicki Minaj and Cardi I
Speaker 1: believe were the last like feud where there was like,
Speaker 1: you know, fist thrown, hands were thrown. Now hands were
Speaker 1: thrown is not what I'm talking to. That's already one
Speaker 1: that was probably more a millennial thing. So they said
Speaker 1: that was probably the last celebrity, you know, pop star
Speaker 1: girly feud where hands were thrown. And then one of
Speaker 1: the girls said, and they left no recipes, They left
Speaker 1: no recipes, And then one of them repeated left no recipes.
Speaker 1: And so when Bowen repeated no recipes, I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: this is not just this girl saying something that doesn't
Speaker 1: maybe she got the frame is wrong or something. It's
Speaker 1: a real thing. So I googled it. Nothing literally left
Speaker 1: no recipes. I don't know what they're talking about. Then
Speaker 1: I asked Emily and she said, this one's actually interesting,
Speaker 1: and this is why I love this etymology of gen
Speaker 1: Z Lingo. So I guess there was a TikTok where
Speaker 1: some conservative moron was talking about how women have become
Speaker 1: too bold and empowered and they you know, in the
Speaker 1: workplace and they don't like cook anymore, and they don't
Speaker 1: they're not housekeep you know, they're don't homemakers and stay
Speaker 1: at home moms. And so women now the the recipes
Speaker 1: have been lost. Their moms did not give them the recipes.
Speaker 1: They there's been no recipes passed down, And so gen
Speaker 1: Z took that as like they left the recipes or
Speaker 1: the it's something with recipes. I forget the exact phrasing,
Speaker 1: but I liked that they took this thing. This guy
Speaker 1: said that. Everyone was just like, what are you talking about?
Speaker 1: But it makes sense, like the moms didn't give the
Speaker 1: recipes how to make the cookies, and the women are
Speaker 1: now being like, well, just Uber eats them, right, and
Speaker 1: that's somehow.
Speaker 3: And then gen Z co opted it and made it
Speaker 3: a positive thing.
Speaker 1: And just turned it into a thing of like when
Speaker 1: you don't when you don't teach the next generation something
Speaker 1: that's I mean, I guess they didn't like to take
Speaker 1: it back from him. They just used it the way
Speaker 1: he used it. But I like that they got it
Speaker 1: from some guy, Like I like that it comes across.
Speaker 1: I like that they just hear something somewhere and then
Speaker 1: it it gets passed around.
Speaker 3: Well, like the genesis of a new slange that all
Speaker 3: that will blow up. I mean, they all got to
Speaker 3: start somewhere.
Speaker 1: Yes, And that is I just like I think. I
Speaker 1: like etymology and where words come from and why we
Speaker 1: use them, and so this is why I've become like
Speaker 1: fascinated by it. If you guys, ever, if Bestie's ever
Speaker 1: learned about a gen Z term and where it comes
Speaker 1: from or something interesting or something new, your kid is saying,
Speaker 1: please DM me with it. I love it so so much.
Speaker 3: If we could figure out what no recipes actually means,
Speaker 3: I do feel like that's a good one.
Speaker 1: No, that's what it means. It means like the recipes
Speaker 1: weren't passed down, so I would say like if if
Speaker 1: you know, oh, so let's say when Noah was gone,
Speaker 1: and what's her name, Jesus Christ, I'm so sorry, Olivia.
Speaker 1: Olivia stepped in. I've had one hour and twenty minutes
Speaker 1: sleep for everyone to know. But I'm feeling great. Don't
Speaker 1: worry about me. I really am. I hate when people
Speaker 1: in podcasts are like I haven't slept and I feel
Speaker 1: like shit, and you're like, well, then I don't want
Speaker 1: to listen to this shit. But I feel good. So
Speaker 1: when Olivia stepped in, if Olivia would have been like,
Speaker 1: I don't know how to run this thing, we would
Speaker 1: have been like, Noah left no recipes?
Speaker 3: Is that really? Because then it's then that's just like
Speaker 3: instead of no instructions.
Speaker 1: It's just a cooler way to say it.
Speaker 3: Like, it's just a cooler way to say no instructions.
Speaker 1: It's like maybe, yeah, it's just like you didn't pass
Speaker 1: down the information that you had to make the next
Speaker 1: generation know like how to do things.
Speaker 3: We've lost the institutional knowledge is what the slang should
Speaker 3: be there.
Speaker 1: Yes, not as quippy and fun. But I thought I
Speaker 1: had something to do with receipts, which when that when
Speaker 1: receipts came out of this the lingo, I did not
Speaker 1: understand what it was, like, I need receipts, and now
Speaker 1: receipts is like we all.
Speaker 3: Say it like, I mean, it's amazing.
Speaker 1: It really makes sense. That's one that like at first,
Speaker 1: it was a little clunky putting it on, like a
Speaker 1: pair of new shoes. I had some blisters, Like I
Speaker 1: was struggling like saying it. Now I could say it
Speaker 1: and my parents would probably understand.
Speaker 3: I love it. I mean, I feel like we're having
Speaker 3: a lot more fun with the language of these days
Speaker 3: in America. Yeah, I think so, just all of a
Speaker 3: sudden gotten fun.
Speaker 1: I mean, I let's talk about this is Your Country?
Speaker 1: The special that Brian Show ran, Tim Dillon's Uh this
Speaker 1: is Your Country uh cracked the Netflix top ten. It
Speaker 1: did for two days for two days, which is for comedies.
Speaker 3: This week, I mean, this is maybe the most competitive
Speaker 3: week I've ever seen on Netflix. Number one sweeping the
Speaker 3: nation is the Adam Brody Kristen Bell rom com Nobody
Speaker 3: Wants This, which has been at number one for a
Speaker 3: long time. Everybody loves that show. It's at the nation
Speaker 3: first for a rom com. Mm hmm, the only because
Speaker 3: Hollywood stopped making rom coms that were good. They put
Speaker 3: out one or two a year at they all star
Speaker 3: Sidney Sweeney, and they were just looking for something that
Speaker 3: I think the world was ready for, like a real
Speaker 3: good rom com.
Speaker 1: And man, here's my thing about Nobody Wants This. I
Speaker 1: was watching it and I was like, if I pitched
Speaker 1: a TV show to my team and was like, and
Speaker 1: I want the romantic lead to have a podcast. Oh god,
Speaker 1: everyone would say, no, that's a bad idea because Sex
Speaker 1: and the City just did it and it wasn't it
Speaker 1: was made. It was mocked on Sex and the City,
Speaker 1: So don't do it. What I've learned from Nobody Wants
Speaker 1: This is that you can you should do things other
Speaker 1: people have done because it means it work, work, And
Speaker 1: I'm not saying it's derivative or that they stole it
Speaker 1: from it. Like having a podcast is a thing for
Speaker 1: a girl to do now like many many people. So
Speaker 1: it should be a job that can be repeated. Like
Speaker 1: I feel like anytime I try to put together a
Speaker 1: TV show, it's like that's been done. Well, that's been done.
Speaker 1: It's like, well, then we should do it and do
Speaker 1: it our way, right, and it's fine. But I was
Speaker 1: just kind of like fuming and there was some blood
Speaker 1: coming out of my ears from the thought of, like,
Speaker 1: now I can't be a podcast co host on the
Speaker 1: show that I pitch, even though that is what I
Speaker 1: would want to do. But guess what, Yes I can.
Speaker 1: I'll do it again. I don't give a fuck. But
Speaker 1: I think it's a really cute show. I'm really enjoying it.
Speaker 1: I've made it two episodes in and I just don't
Speaker 1: have much more to say about it than that than
Speaker 1: that I'm watching it with a lot of jealousy because
Speaker 1: I wish I wrote this. Yes I did so.
Speaker 3: Were you an Adam Brody fan?
Speaker 1: Hell? Yeah, I was always a Brody boy. I never
Speaker 1: was into the other guy. He too bad, he was
Speaker 1: too quiet, he was too subdued. Adam Brody was funny,
Speaker 1: and he seemed to pine for Summer's character, which is
Speaker 1: always an attractive quality when the guy is not trying
Speaker 1: to be too aloof. And I like Brodina I like
Speaker 1: him now too. I think he's very charming. I think
Speaker 1: they have great chemistry. And Kristen Bell, I'll watch that
Speaker 1: girl do anything. I love her face, I love her
Speaker 1: facial expressions. I love her acting style. I love Justine
Speaker 1: Loope loop Loop. I think it a name is who
Speaker 1: plays her sister? I love his sister played by Why
Speaker 1: now I can't think of her name, even though she's
Speaker 1: my friend, the really caustic one. Oh my god, I'm
Speaker 1: so sorry that I can't remember your name right now.
Speaker 1: She dated, She dated Kyle Dunagan, Anne wrote Glassman. She's Jackie, Uh,
Speaker 1: Jackie God. This is a really bad example that my
Speaker 1: brain isn't working because she's actually a friend of mine
Speaker 1: and Jackie Tone, and she's the best name ever, Jackie Tone.
Speaker 1: She's so funny in it. I think it's great. But
Speaker 1: so yeah, that was Everyone's been watching that, and my
Speaker 1: feelings are just jealousy that, like, oh god, this is
Speaker 1: the only show on Netflix that I could see myself
Speaker 1: having pitched or being able to write. And I feel
Speaker 1: like I missed the boat. But you know what, I
Speaker 1: don't want to make a show or I would, so
Speaker 1: just let them have success. And I'm happy for everyone involved,
Speaker 1: and I'll keep watching and not make it about me,
Speaker 1: so tell me when there's Love is Blind.
Speaker 3: So yeah, so number one was that sweeping the nation,
Speaker 3: and then the day after This Is Your Country came out,
Speaker 3: the Love is Blind Season seven came out, and that
Speaker 3: was obviously going to take up the top five.
Speaker 1: Also that enough of that show, enough of we don't
Speaker 1: need anymore. These are all field couples that will never
Speaker 1: make it. The experiment is over, it doesn't work, everyone regrets,
Speaker 1: no one.
Speaker 3: There's been no successful couples out of Love is Blind.
Speaker 1: I don't think maybe Lauren and what's his name off
Speaker 1: the first season, but since then not, I don't really
Speaker 1: think so. I just I fell out of love for
Speaker 1: that show because I was just like, these people don't
Speaker 1: really know each other. This is a complete manipulation to
Speaker 1: get people to fall in love fast. I've seen it
Speaker 1: happen before. I'm kind of disenchanted with it now.
Speaker 2: I guess it's kind of like a counterpoint to what
Speaker 2: you were saying before. But something that grinds my gears
Speaker 2: is like when something works and then it's like they
Speaker 2: just stretch it out. Like with Love is Blind. They
Speaker 2: did all these seasons and then they did the one
Speaker 2: in Brazil in Mexico. It's okay, I get it.
Speaker 1: Yes, the one thing I will say was interesting about that,
Speaker 1: And I didn't watch all the you know, different cities
Speaker 1: around the country, but Anya did, and she said it
Speaker 1: was really interesting to see how people date in other countries.
Speaker 1: How and the same with Love Island. I've heard that
Speaker 1: British women do not sleep with a guy for so long,
Speaker 1: and they do not kiss, they don't get cuddly, like
Speaker 1: they won't give it up for anything. And I like it.
Speaker 1: And I bet I don't know how they got that
Speaker 1: advice to not do that stuff too soon, but they're
Speaker 1: living the right life. Okay, We're gonna finish up this
Speaker 1: conversation about this is your country because I want to
Speaker 1: talk about it. It was so good and and I
Speaker 1: want to hear all the other stuff that got impeded
Speaker 1: your way from being number one right after this. All right,
Speaker 1: So we got Love is Blind, we got Nobody Wants This.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the season finale of The Circle came out. We
Speaker 3: have Nicole Kidman's show The Perfect Couple, which is still
Speaker 3: up there.
Speaker 1: That was still raining.
Speaker 3: Yeah. We had Emily in Paris, which we wound up
Speaker 3: overtaking actually, but that was on there for seven weeks.
Speaker 3: So the Vince McMahon documentary.
Speaker 1: Oh oh, that's good.
Speaker 3: And then the Menendez Brothers Monsters Menendez Brothers doc.
Speaker 1: Couldn't watch more than five minutes of it. Too dark
Speaker 1: to ACTI.
Speaker 3: People saying that. People said that it's not as good
Speaker 3: as the other Monsters series, which is Damer.
Speaker 1: Oh Dahmer was so good, And I'm sure Monsters is good.
Speaker 1: I've heard people say it is good and they like,
Speaker 1: think you got to watch it, but I was just like, I,
Speaker 1: I don't think that this. I don't know if I
Speaker 1: like dramatizations of real things. I kind of wanted to
Speaker 1: see a documentary about those two bros. Okay, so this
Speaker 1: is your country.
Speaker 3: So then we got knocked out by a uh this cartoon,
Speaker 3: a really solid cartoon called Digital Circus, which has a
Speaker 3: huge following on YouTube. They released a YouTube episode a
Speaker 3: few years ago and I got three hundred and thirty
Speaker 3: million views on YouTube and then nah yeah, and then
Speaker 3: Netflix picked it up. It's got international appeal, a lot
Speaker 3: of Spanish language fans. And now that's a like number
Speaker 3: four or something.
Speaker 1: But how often are you checking this?
Speaker 3: Every five minutes? Truly I'm serious. Since this is your
Speaker 3: Country has come out, I think I've spent every five
Speaker 3: minutes of every day reading every single comment, every single post,
Speaker 3: every single reply that anyone has. I think I've seen
Speaker 3: it all. I'm having trouble finding new things that people
Speaker 3: have said about it. I've read thousands and thousands of comments.
Speaker 1: Tim Dillon doing this?
Speaker 3: No, No, he is not, he is much?
Speaker 1: Is Bill Dixon your other?
Speaker 3: No? No, But someone's got to do it. Someone's well.
Speaker 3: I'm learning a lot about reading these comments and reading
Speaker 3: all the reactions and things like.
Speaker 1: That I'm sure to use and some new slang yeah, no,
Speaker 1: is it making you happy?
Speaker 3: There are some So the response is overwhelmingly positive from
Speaker 3: regular people on the Internet. There are certain like little
Speaker 3: like hellholes of the Internet where people have like such
Speaker 3: extreme opinions it's like mind boggling. And then every once
Speaker 3: in a while you see someone who has like a
Speaker 3: good note that I'm like, oh, I would take that
Speaker 3: note if we got more episodes of it. But I
Speaker 3: love seeing all the comments. I'd say the overwhelming number
Speaker 3: one comment that we.
Speaker 1: Get is yeah, more Tim.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 3: Well, I guess in a way, it's more Tim, But that's.
Speaker 1: The people were fake.
Speaker 3: Well they weren't. That's not the number one comment. That
Speaker 3: is I would say something that people are discussing and people.
Speaker 3: It's interesting because people who say they don't like the
Speaker 3: show tend to also say that the people were actors
Speaker 3: and they were improvising, and that it was a sketch show,
Speaker 3: which is so frustrating and so annoying because it was
Speaker 3: not a sketch show, illegitimate. They just don't they can't
Speaker 3: accept the fact that Tim sincerely tried to make a
Speaker 3: talk show with real people.
Speaker 1: Right right, Okay, So what's the number one comment.
Speaker 3: Number one comment by a lot by magnitudes orders of
Speaker 3: magnitude is we want more episodes?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 3: Why is there only one episode? Is this seriously just one? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I'm concused by that. They were like, are we getting
Speaker 1: a new one next week? It does feel like that,
Speaker 1: Like that's obviously what the show is is there's there
Speaker 1: is to be more, So hopefully that's something that's in talks.
Speaker 3: And I came to this realization, like for the judging,
Speaker 3: this show is really difficult because like, imagine it's a
Speaker 3: it's a talk show, it's a daytime talk show. Imagine
Speaker 3: if like The Kelly Clarkson Show just released one episode
Speaker 3: and then you had to like review it.
Speaker 1: Well, do you know the first episode of every TV
Speaker 1: show is awful? Not that this This was so funny.
Speaker 1: I the best time at the premiere watching it with
Speaker 1: like a huge room of people. Yeah, that was so fun.
Speaker 3: That was so cool. Thank you for coming to that.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Well it was so fun to watch
Speaker 1: at the impro It was the premiere party kind of thing.
Speaker 1: And Tim did stand up to introduce it and was
Speaker 1: so funny. Yeah, as always my favorite. And then he
Speaker 1: introduces it, and then I got to sit with right
Speaker 1: next to Brian and Ali his wife, and then Bill,
Speaker 1: my great friend who also worked on it, was in
Speaker 1: the room and Tim was miles away having dinner with
Speaker 1: a group of people because he liked me. I would
Speaker 1: want to get the fuck out of that.
Speaker 3: Kindn't like to.
Speaker 1: I would. It would be my worst nightmare to screen
Speaker 1: something that I was in and watch people react to it.
Speaker 1: But it you know, when I would if I would
Speaker 1: have watched it on my laptop at home, not as
Speaker 1: many laughs because I was just like, you know, I
Speaker 1: would have been studying it and distracted. I was just
Speaker 1: like locked in and it felt so good for me
Speaker 1: to see it kill so hard with every people were
Speaker 1: fucking loving it. That was Yeah, I think it was
Speaker 1: really good for all of you to see.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was really good. We had definitive proof that
Speaker 3: people liked it, and everyone we screened it for said they
Speaker 3: loved it too. And that's the That is the overwhelming
Speaker 3: can census of the comments online. If you look at like,
Speaker 3: you know, obviously there's haters everywhere, and that's what I
Speaker 3: focus on, But if you look at like the comments
Speaker 3: on Instagram, the comments on TikTok, everyone's just like, I
Speaker 3: love this, this is amazing, what a great concept. And yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm very happy about that.
Speaker 1: But the one thing I was going to say that
Speaker 1: I learned the woman's voice that's like are you serious?
Speaker 1: Are you serious? Are you serious? It is so greating
Speaker 1: to me but also so funny. And her husband, Guy
Speaker 1: was so ridiculous. And my favorite part was him describing
Speaker 1: hamster combat.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah.
Speaker 1: My favorite thing about Tim is that he's on everyone's
Speaker 1: side initially, you know, like he's rooting for these people
Speaker 1: who are bad people, and he likes that they're bad.
Speaker 1: He's like, he will tell them, you're the worst person
Speaker 1: I ever met in my life, but then he is
Speaker 1: encouraging and sweet and like, you know, there are little
Speaker 1: parts that I loved, like when when the Bigger Girl
Speaker 1: was on and her mom, So this girl is like
Speaker 1: my mom is like meddling in my life, and like
Speaker 1: she she's constantly monitoring what I eat and she's like
Speaker 1: a girl was like a plus size girl and Tim
Speaker 1: and she's like she she wants to monitor what kind
Speaker 1: of coffee I get? And Tim's like, what kind of coffee?
Speaker 1: What do we get? And she's like like a latte
Speaker 1: with like I don't know some I get some pumps
Speaker 1: of stuff and he goes, oh, you're gonna pump it up.
Speaker 1: You're gonna pump it like he was like he just
Speaker 1: was like on her side, like we're gonna pump it up.
Speaker 1: That was such an endearing moment. Tim is such an
Speaker 1: endearing figure, but he's also so cutting and is almost
Speaker 1: like operating on an intellectual level that no almost no
Speaker 1: one I've ever known is, and he can say things
Speaker 1: that no one even catches are hilarious. But he also
Speaker 1: seems like he's on your side and he's on their side,
Speaker 1: and he's one of them but he's also making fun
Speaker 1: of them. He threads that line so perfectly. He's the
Speaker 1: overwhelming consensus I saw was just more Tim, like, let's
Speaker 1: just get Tim interacting with America. And that's what the
Speaker 1: show was, essentially, and with some really funny characters who
Speaker 1: By the way, we're not scripted everyone, Do you guys
Speaker 1: know how reality TV works? This is how it works.
Speaker 1: People come in with a story and before they go out,
Speaker 1: producers tell them here's the best way to tell the story.
Speaker 1: So sometimes they seem a little bit like they're trying
Speaker 1: to remember how they were told to say it, which
Speaker 1: is not telling. It's not scripted. It's just like, hey,
Speaker 1: we need to get the cold context of this in
Speaker 1: order for this to work for the show. So I
Speaker 1: think sometimes even on f Boy Island, same producer, they
Speaker 1: the guys would explain themselves in a way or that
Speaker 1: seemed like they were trying to remember a script in
Speaker 1: their head, but it's really about what the producer told them, like,
Speaker 1: in order for this to be as clear as possible
Speaker 1: for people to understand your story, we're not adding to it.
Speaker 1: We're just telling you, like, let's say it in this order. Perhaps,
Speaker 1: And I think that's where they look a little bit
Speaker 1: like deer in headlights. Oh, I'm gonna fuck this up
Speaker 1: if I don't get this right. I'm saying this away.
Speaker 1: I maybe wouldn't say it, but by no means is
Speaker 1: anyone ever told what to say. All the stories were
Speaker 1: totally real.
Speaker 3: Oh, absolutely totally real. Like the guy that proposed, he said,
Speaker 3: I want to propose.
Speaker 1: That was so funny.
Speaker 3: You know, the guy did lose two hundred thousand dollars
Speaker 3: investing in NFTs. He wanted to come on the show
Speaker 3: and confess to his wife because he's a fan of
Speaker 3: Tim Dillon, and he thought saying it on the show
Speaker 3: would soften the blow, which I bet it did.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and she seemed to forgive him.
Speaker 3: She seemed to forget. I mean, she was definitely pissed.
Speaker 1: It was so funny when she walked out and was pregnant.
Speaker 1: It was just like such a nice reveal. You guys
Speaker 1: like killed it. I'm I was just so proud of
Speaker 1: you that night. And I was like texting with Brian afterwards,
Speaker 1: like you can't deny what happened, like it killed in
Speaker 1: the room. You can't deny it, like it's it's a success.
Speaker 1: And if it doesn't reach the top ten of Netflix,
Speaker 1: because it was undecided at that point. It it's it's niche,
Speaker 1: it almost it'd be weird if it did. I'm so
Speaker 1: glad it did, but it's it shouldn't be expected because
Speaker 1: it is so niche. But it did. And then and
Speaker 1: Brian said to me if it if it makes the
Speaker 1: top ten, I will rejoice, that is all the matter.
Speaker 1: And then it reached number ten and I go, are
Speaker 1: you rejoicing? And he was like, well, not quite yet,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, no, you said you would.
Speaker 3: No I didn't rejoice. I still haven't rejoiced. I you know,
Speaker 3: I have high expectations and high hopes for things I do,
Speaker 3: and I if they're not if they don't reach. The
Speaker 3: only time I've actually ever been happy after a thing
Speaker 3: was the roast. The roast, Yeah, because that is expectations.
Speaker 1: That's the only time I've been happy after the thing too. Honestly,
Speaker 1: it's because it's the only time in my career. Also
Speaker 1: it is is it is exceeded. I mean even every
Speaker 1: special life taped, it's felt like did we get it?
Speaker 1: I don't know, It's just that is the and maybe
Speaker 1: like a couple of Conan appearances. I was like, I
Speaker 1: couldn't have done better, but you're right, it's it's set
Speaker 1: a bar for our lives that just that magic was
Speaker 1: made that night. Not it was not all on me,
Speaker 1: not even close to all on me. It was just
Speaker 1: like a lucky night. But I think overwhelming, this is
Speaker 1: a huge success. And you I hope, uh you've you've
Speaker 1: you're you're letting some of it in.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I am. And if you if you haven't
Speaker 3: watched it yet, please go watch it. But whatever you do,
Speaker 3: don't hit play and watch it for five minutes and
Speaker 3: then stop it. It's better that you don't watch it
Speaker 3: at all.
Speaker 1: We talked about that.
Speaker 2: That's why I haven't watched it yet because I literally
Speaker 2: only had like four minutes to watch it with the
Speaker 2: band stuff and family. So I was like, oh, I
Speaker 2: can't start it because I'm good. Yes, I'm gonna ruth.
Speaker 1: I mean, I was with a new postpartum mom this weekend.
Speaker 1: I was with Kirsten in Kansas City, and like, your
Speaker 1: tits are like the number one concern, Like your tits
Speaker 1: filling with milk, leaking, milk being needed to milk making.
Speaker 1: It's it is like it's like having a sick dog.
Speaker 1: Your tits are sick dogs that you constantly need to
Speaker 1: be monitoring, cannot leave alone for even forty five minutes
Speaker 1: without yet making little messes. You're gonna have to put
Speaker 1: like just a patch on it because it's just that's
Speaker 1: it's bleeding every or whatever. You know, Like your tits
Speaker 1: are like a huge concern, and it seems like so
Speaker 1: it seems so annoying to always have to pump everywhere
Speaker 1: and all the time and and have them like filling
Speaker 1: up and being like, oh god, they're gonna blow. It
Speaker 1: was as that that seems like it's so exhausting. I
Speaker 1: couldn't imagine it's watching a tim show.
Speaker 2: It's supply and demand. That's how it works. Yeah, like why.
Speaker 1: I would be mixing in formula a SAP if I
Speaker 1: was like, I just couldn't. It's too much. It's it's
Speaker 1: it's a sick dog, and I would wanted that dog
Speaker 1: to be healed. But it's it's like.
Speaker 3: It's how long you have to deal with that?
Speaker 1: For up to a year or more if you're weird.
Speaker 2: It really depends on on what you know, Like is
Speaker 2: the situation.
Speaker 1: I mean, seven year olds are sucking on tits. Like
Speaker 1: there's some women that go to like four Wow. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's because as long as they're sucking, you're will produce it.
Speaker 3: Oh, I see, yeah, supply and demand.
Speaker 2: Situation and demand exactly.
Speaker 3: Yes. Well I saw a movie or a TV show
Speaker 3: or something where a woman's baby was taken from her
Speaker 3: or something and then she was like lactating and people
Speaker 3: felt really bad for her because she had no baby.
Speaker 2: To Some women will donate their milk. Also, there's such
Speaker 2: thing as donor milk.
Speaker 1: I can't believe. We all came up on formula and
Speaker 1: no one questioned it, and now it's like, it's truly insane.
Speaker 1: If Kirsten was like, if a little droplet of milk falls,
Speaker 1: it's like it's liquid gold. And moms were just shake
Speaker 1: it up formula and then.
Speaker 3: What would they do with their actual with their Actually.
Speaker 1: Well, they stop producing it because they're not using it.
Speaker 1: If you don't use it, you lose it.
Speaker 2: Yep.
Speaker 3: How much could you sell your breast milk for?
Speaker 2: It's again, it's donor, so you don't sell it.
Speaker 3: You don't sell it on the black market.
Speaker 1: It's like child porn, no offense. But that is the
Speaker 1: way child porn is like, no one pays for it.
Speaker 1: They all just are like feel bad for each other,
Speaker 1: and so they just like give it to each other.
Speaker 1: I know, that's a weird thing.
Speaker 3: How did you find that?
Speaker 1: As Because of all the podcasts I listened to, that
Speaker 1: was one of the most fascinating things. That was, like,
Speaker 1: no one pays for child porn because they're all like, dudes,
Speaker 1: we are the most weird people in society. We got
Speaker 1: to help each other out. And so it's all just
Speaker 1: like they all get in these dark web kind of
Speaker 1: forums and they earn kind of seniority and then the
Speaker 1: ones at the top get the best quote unquote. It's
Speaker 1: just so sick. But I was shocked to learn there's
Speaker 1: no money in it.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And so I go, what am I even doing
Speaker 1: this for doing just I mean, I'm like the ditty stuff.
Speaker 1: Nothing's really coming out of that camp. I've been waiting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, quiet on the front and.
Speaker 1: Why something is interested in pedophile Stop stop making me
Speaker 1: feel weird about being interested in hearing and reading about pedophiles.
Speaker 1: Everyone is chomping at the bit for ditty stuff, which
Speaker 1: is some of the craziest shit you will ever hear.
Speaker 1: That is so morbid and so disgusting, but people are
Speaker 1: like people can't wait for more stuff to leak, and
Speaker 1: so don't come at me for being like kind of
Speaker 1: intrigued by this stuff sick way, And I'm thinking either
Speaker 1: of you are saying that.
Speaker 2: I think that everyone is a pedophile, like I I
Speaker 2: don't know, Like my pedophile radar is like so totally
Speaker 2: up right now that I have a baby, Oh really,
Speaker 2: why do I go on my kid?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 2: Why do you want I change her clothes? Why do
Speaker 2: you want to change her diaper? It's like everything is
Speaker 2: like very questionable, even women, or is just met everyone
Speaker 2: everyone ecly me and AVI?
Speaker 1: Do you think that's a common fear because I don't
Speaker 1: remember moms feeling that way, like moms are just always
Speaker 1: handing babies off. Or is this like a new thing
Speaker 1: coming out with all the news of like how there
Speaker 1: are so.
Speaker 2: Many I mean, I don't know. I just know it's
Speaker 2: my thing, but I don't know. I can't answer that question.
Speaker 1: I think you're smart, honestly, why not err on the
Speaker 1: side of caution.
Speaker 3: It's crazy how much that's that's percolated throughout because it's
Speaker 3: not like there's more pedophiles now than there was, but
Speaker 3: like I like, if you talk to like your parents'
Speaker 3: generation or something like that, like back in the fifties,
Speaker 3: they would just let.
Speaker 2: Like they were so naive.
Speaker 3: You well, you have your your kid could get picked
Speaker 3: up by like a neighborhood guy who would drive you
Speaker 3: back home from school or whatever, and that was fine.
Speaker 1: Yep, oh I constantly getting picked up by other people,
Speaker 1: parents said. And my dad told a story once that
Speaker 1: he got approached by a guy when he was little
Speaker 1: that was obviously a creep that wanted to do stuff
Speaker 1: to him and was like, hey, kid, get in the car,
Speaker 1: like a classic situation like that, and he was like,
Speaker 1: you want to go?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 1: You want to go?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 1: I have baseball equipment? You like baseball because like every
Speaker 1: kid like baseball. I guess He's like, do you want
Speaker 1: to go watch baseball? Something about baseball, and my dad
Speaker 1: was like, I don't really like baseball. So my dad's
Speaker 1: like lack of interest in baseball like saved his life.
Speaker 1: He was just like, I don't really want to do
Speaker 1: like something pedophile picked like the wrong thing for my dad,
Speaker 1: Like do you want to go look for arrowheads or
Speaker 1: paddle mostly down? A river.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so could all stock in baseball if you just
Speaker 3: had different equipment in his car, you should have at
Speaker 3: least had three sports in there. Yeah, what about hockey?
Speaker 3: Do you like hockey?
Speaker 1: Now? How you can't murder a kid with a racket ball?
Speaker 3: Was that? Well he doesn't one to murder, does he? Well,
Speaker 3: we don't know what.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe I was just making the joke that he
Speaker 1: the both the thing to lure the child was also
Speaker 1: the weapon. Yes, which is a sick thing to say,
Speaker 1: but I'm a sick bitch. You know what. This is
Speaker 1: a great place to take a break. We'll be back
Speaker 1: after this and I'll tell you about my weekend a
Speaker 1: little bit. I I did what did I do?
Speaker 2: This?
Speaker 1: Wee again? I did so much this weekend. Friday night,
Speaker 1: I was in Windsor, Ontario, which is right across the
Speaker 1: river from Detroit. I like did not know that Canada
Speaker 1: like butted up to Detroit, like very closely. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: it's it's like it literally you could if you had
Speaker 1: a really good arm and a slingshot or a catapult,
Speaker 1: you could throw a rock and hit a building on
Speaker 1: the other side. Like you could swim across the river
Speaker 1: and be like I'm in Canada and it Windsor was beautiful.
Speaker 1: I was at the Caesars Casino and I did not
Speaker 1: look into this gig in any way, Like I don't
Speaker 1: ever look into gigs. I just go. I know I'm
Speaker 1: going to a city. I know it's gonna be a theater.
Speaker 1: I know who's gonna be there in terms of like
Speaker 1: the people I'm working with. I hope fans show up.
Speaker 1: I don't know if they will. I can't control it,
Speaker 1: so I'm not gonna look at ticket numbers. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna I'm not gonna monitor it. And let me just
Speaker 1: say most comedians are monitoring the fuck out of that
Speaker 1: stuff and being like, who's going to be there? How
Speaker 1: big is the show? What is We walk into a
Speaker 1: venue and you know, I'll walk in with my openers,
Speaker 1: and the people will usually be like, do you want
Speaker 1: to see the stage, and it is a resounding yes,
Speaker 1: and then I just keep walking to the green room.
Speaker 1: I don't cause I just I don't want to. I
Speaker 1: don't want anything to come in that will make me
Speaker 1: nervous about it. Oh, I think that's it. And also
Speaker 1: I kind of don't care like it does it and
Speaker 1: nothing's going to change my performance.
Speaker 2: Is it all the same to you? At this people
Speaker 2: doing it everything.
Speaker 3: So long, so many different venues.
Speaker 1: I would like to say that, but I know people
Speaker 1: who have been doing it long too, and they're still
Speaker 1: interested in like, wow, look at the the drapery or
Speaker 1: look at the architecture. Like I will perform in beautiful venues,
Speaker 1: but because I'm out there doing stand up, I'm distracted,
Speaker 1: so I can't really take in the ceilings and stuff.
Speaker 1: But everyone knows I'm not really into looking at buildings anyway.
Speaker 3: Like Bill Burr when he goes to a theater, he
Speaker 3: does that, he goes, look at the drapery.
Speaker 1: He's really no, I'm sure he like steps out and goes, wow,
Speaker 1: look at this is a beautiful place. But maybe not.
Speaker 1: But I will say that I did not at this location,
Speaker 1: and maybe I should have because I did not look
Speaker 1: at the capacity of it, and I stepped out. And
Speaker 1: it is so many more people that I've ever played for. Wow,
Speaker 1: it was like it was fifty two hundred I think
Speaker 1: sold out, and I'm usually I mean, I'm usually playing
Speaker 1: to like seventeen.
Speaker 3: Hundreds, which is so many two.
Speaker 1: Thousand, Yeah, and then a couple three thousands here and there,
Speaker 1: and so for this to be like I was like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck? It was like a surprise party. It
Speaker 1: was like an intervention for everyone to let me know
Speaker 1: that I'm famous.
Speaker 3: But that didn't throw you off when you stepped out there.
Speaker 1: Right help, no, no, if anything, it lit me up.
Speaker 1: It was like, oh my god, Like I felt like
Speaker 1: such gratitude and was like just energized by it.
Speaker 3: It was so beforehand and saw the number of seats this,
Speaker 3: you wouldn't have gotten that boost.
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe not, Like maybe I would have gotten the
Speaker 1: boost when I saw the seats and been like and
Speaker 1: the guys would have been like it sold out, I
Speaker 1: would be like it it like, maybe I would have
Speaker 1: had the boost before. But I had a new opener
Speaker 1: come with me because I didn't want to bring the
Speaker 1: whole crew to Canada because it just seemed like a hassle.
Speaker 1: So I had a just Troit comedian come over that
Speaker 1: was recommended to me. Her name is Camilla Bellario, and
Speaker 1: she was so funny and so poised and like just
Speaker 1: got out there and I was like, oh fuck, like
Speaker 1: this is some professional shit, and I was like I
Speaker 1: gotta raise my game because they instantly like loved her
Speaker 1: like she was the headliner and I was like, what's happening,
Speaker 1: Not that doesn't she went out cold, like I just
Speaker 1: this crowd was just amazing. But also she was so
Speaker 1: good and she played guitar like she would just pick up.
Speaker 1: She's a trained operatic singer. Wow, she's a folk singer.
Speaker 1: She looks like Casey musk Graves. She just gave birth
Speaker 1: four months ago and she was back. She was so good.
Speaker 1: Camilla Bellario everyone should follow her really funny songs. But
Speaker 1: she also like is a singer songwriter, folk singer. But
Speaker 1: she was backstage. We were talking about having kids because
Speaker 1: she just had her first one. I think she only
Speaker 1: is gonna have one as far as I understood the conversation,
Speaker 1: but she was saying. I was like, yeah, it's just
Speaker 1: you know, it's not for me, and she's like, just
Speaker 1: do it. She was like so casual about it. She's like, honestly,
Speaker 1: it's not that hard. Everyone makes it seem like it's
Speaker 1: so hard because they need to like justify, like I
Speaker 1: agree that they feel like exhausted by it, like they
Speaker 1: want to get sympathy, so they complain that it's hard,
Speaker 1: but it's really she goes, the first three months hell,
Speaker 1: absolute hell. She was like, she was like, pregnancy not fun.
Speaker 1: Giving birth literally the worst, the worst thing I've ever done.
Speaker 1: She was like, it was not fun. I don't understand
Speaker 1: that when people like that process. It was the worst
Speaker 1: thing for me ever. And then three months, the first
Speaker 1: three months absolute hell. I won't go into details why,
Speaker 1: but she had some really interesting things to say about it.
Speaker 1: And then she goes, and then it's easy, It's so easy,
Speaker 1: And I go, well, you're only one month out of
Speaker 1: that three months, you're four months, You've had a.
Speaker 2: Seven year old, and you're like, and then it gets easy.
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's been easy for a month for you.
Speaker 1: But she had a good point of like, with child
Speaker 1: care if you can afford it, and you know, once
Speaker 1: they're babies and they're sleeping out, like, but I understand that.
Speaker 1: I really do think that I could get past how
Speaker 1: hard pregnancy is, how hard giving birth is, and being
Speaker 1: like a new injured mother that has to like kind
Speaker 1: of like be with the baby all the time and
Speaker 1: have this but I and I admire it so much,
Speaker 1: and I am overwhelmed by how much hard work it looks.
Speaker 1: I think I could do it. I don't. I know
Speaker 1: for a fact, I can't play with a kid. I
Speaker 1: am not I can't be on the ground being like
Speaker 1: this is Oh, I'm here and I got cookies. You
Speaker 1: can't stay here that long. We don't even have cookies.
Speaker 1: Well I want them, and then I'm done with the scene.
Speaker 1: I don't know what else to do, and kids want
Speaker 1: you to keep going, like I can't make things other things.
Speaker 1: I don't want to do voices. I don't want to
Speaker 1: be on the ground playing.
Speaker 3: They're not really following the storyline either, Like the storylines
Speaker 3: have to be so simple. Yeah, that cookie thing is
Speaker 3: even too complicated, Like my knees if you did the
Speaker 3: cookie thing, she would not be able to follow it.
Speaker 1: I can do it for three minutes tops, and even
Speaker 1: that's a long sketch's like an SNL sketch. I don't
Speaker 1: want to go longer than three minutes on a bit
Speaker 1: with but the kids want it to go over again
Speaker 1: again a pet Yeah, and I I know my limitations
Speaker 1: as a human being, and I won't do that. So Noah,
Speaker 1: how are you feeling about? Like are you excited to
Speaker 1: like do that kind of play? Because my sister's really
Speaker 1: good at it. She will play with her kids for
Speaker 1: hours like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and also you have to remember that every kid
Speaker 2: is different, which is what I keep reading and it's
Speaker 2: a very positive message. For right now, at five months,
Speaker 2: Toby can do one thing for like maybe five if
Speaker 2: I'm lucky, maybe I'll get ten minutes and then she
Speaker 2: needs to like switch it up.
Speaker 1: But what is the thing like just like putting a
Speaker 1: rattle in her face and being like look and like right.
Speaker 2: Like the rattle will be good for like I don't know,
Speaker 2: a minute at most tummy time or in her little
Speaker 2: bouncy chair and stuff like that. So you just I
Speaker 2: constantly have to transition her into like different games.
Speaker 1: She's in like a workout class that's like ten minutes,
Speaker 1: ten seconds on waits, then you go over here, then
Speaker 1: there's recovery, like it's it sounds like a orange theory. Yeah,
Speaker 1: babies like constantly mixing it up, confused, muscle confusion.
Speaker 2: And then I add loud music and then she's an
Speaker 2: F forty five class.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, right, exactly does she likes music?
Speaker 2: She loves music. Yeah, she loves singing. She makes me
Speaker 2: feel like.
Speaker 1: The video you sent of her singing when she was
Speaker 1: on your lap, and she's just like in her own
Speaker 1: world and always kind of like getting some emailing done
Speaker 1: and typing, and she's like laying in Noah's lap, and
Speaker 1: Noah is like, girls, she's like singing right now, and
Speaker 1: she's just like what was she even? It was amazing.
Speaker 1: I watched it, seriously, I'm not joking you. I watched
Speaker 1: it at least five times because it was so cute
Speaker 1: that she was singing. I've never heard a baby sing.
Speaker 1: I even played it for christ and He's like, do
Speaker 1: babies do that? And I'm like, I don't think they do.
Speaker 2: I think because we just like sink to her all
Speaker 2: the time. We just sing her stupid songs.
Speaker 3: She's like, I mean, I've never heard of a baby singing.
Speaker 3: I've never seen a video of a baby.
Speaker 1: Stops singing because she can almost feel like she's being watched,
Speaker 1: and then you hear Noah start typing again just to
Speaker 1: like everything's normal, and then she starts singing again because
Speaker 1: she thinks the focus is off her. Is so cute.
Speaker 1: That was an amazing video, like amazing. I like, I
Speaker 1: think that was really special.
Speaker 2: And so you get moments like that and then they
Speaker 2: make the hard parts worth it.
Speaker 1: Yes, But I also I loved that video and I
Speaker 1: didn't have to do anything to get it, so like,
Speaker 1: but I understand. I'm like, thank you for the content,
Speaker 1: but no, I get it. It's like it seems awesome.
Speaker 1: I saw Kirsten's baby this weekend. She's not doing a
Speaker 1: lot right now, and uh wasn't really didn't look at me.
Speaker 1: I don't think even once. She was really interested in
Speaker 1: Lauren because I think Laura, my sister, has like dark hair,
Speaker 1: so she was kind of like, what's this dark haired dark?
Speaker 2: Like two months, they don't see much. She's just kind
Speaker 2: of seeing these orbs.
Speaker 1: Okay, she didn't appreciate my act. Yeah, no, she was
Speaker 1: so so cute though, and just so little and like her.
Speaker 1: I just can't. I can't get over how like smooth
Speaker 1: their skin is so because I saw Toby last week
Speaker 1: and I was just rubbing her feet, being like, why
Speaker 1: are there no callouses? Keep them this way forever? It's
Speaker 1: so nice. But yeah, I don't I'm.
Speaker 3: Not buying this, No, no, I'm not. I mean, what
Speaker 3: about when they're two and three and they're running around,
Speaker 3: they're screaming, and they're.
Speaker 1: Eye witnessing that ye did I tell you that my
Speaker 1: nephew told me to shut up? No, Oh my god, Lauren,
Speaker 1: you'll understand me telling the story and arlow when you
Speaker 1: listen when you're older. I love you. But he We're
Speaker 1: at the park the other day and we were like,
Speaker 1: I promise this gets interesting, you guys. I know this
Speaker 1: is baby talking. People are probably zoning out. But so
Speaker 1: we're at the park and there's my sister's three kids,
Speaker 1: a two year old, a four year old, and a
Speaker 1: seven year old, two year old, five year old, seven
Speaker 1: year old, and the two year old is out of control.
Speaker 1: You tell him one thing, he does the opposite he is.
Speaker 1: I literally told her I feel like he is auditioning
Speaker 1: for a problem child too, Like if you if you
Speaker 1: told me that, if you just you know, whenever a
Speaker 1: kid behaves, there's a scenario where it's like if this
Speaker 1: were on a TV show, I'd probably stop watching because
Speaker 1: I'd be like, it's too much, Like we get it.
Speaker 1: He's a bad kid, Like you don't need to make
Speaker 1: him that bad. That's how That's how Forrest was acting.
Speaker 1: He's insane. Forest Green the Death just like no, not
Speaker 1: doing that, Like if you go, we're gonna go here nah,
Speaker 1: and then would sit down. Then he hit the dog.
Speaker 1: Then he would grab the ball from the dog and
Speaker 1: throw it in the pond, even though we're like, don't
Speaker 1: throw it in the pond. Throws it in the pond,
Speaker 1: takes the pizza that someone's eating. I want that, then
Speaker 1: takes it, throws it on the ground. Like literally everything
Speaker 1: bad you could do he was doing because he's just
Speaker 1: in that stage. So Arlow, who's seven, is like, let's
Speaker 1: go to the park. So we're by this pond, so
Speaker 1: it's like this hike to this park is probably like
Speaker 1: a quarter mile across this park. And we go and
Speaker 1: I have the dog with me, and I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: let's go to the park. Then there's an ice cream
Speaker 1: truck on the way and Arlo's like really like I
Speaker 1: went to the park. And we're like, let's not go
Speaker 1: to the park, buddy, it's a too far walk. He's
Speaker 1: like I want to go, and so we we're like, okay, fine,
Speaker 1: we're going. So we're so excited to go to the park.
Speaker 1: We're gonna play. I'm walking ahead with them. Lauren's dealing
Speaker 1: with Forest, who is like given up, and it's just
Speaker 1: sitting down and being like He's literally sitting with his
Speaker 1: arms crossed like I'm not going because of something. And
Speaker 1: then he poops and poop is coming out of his pants.
Speaker 1: There's choplets of poop, and then Matt used my chopstick
Speaker 1: method with some mulch to pick up forest poop, which
Speaker 1: is hilarious. They're so funny, this family. They just everything
Speaker 1: is funny, like they just they live with it. They
Speaker 1: flow with it. It is not a stressful situation. It
Speaker 1: sometimes is, but they're never like I can't do this anymore.
Speaker 1: They just laugh about everything that's happening. So we get
Speaker 1: to the park, we see the ice cream truck. Both
Speaker 1: Poppy and Arla were like I want it, and they're like, no,
Speaker 1: we have candy at home. You're not getting that. You
Speaker 1: didn't even eat your dinner. And they're like, I want
Speaker 1: and then they start in with this like instant fake crying,
Speaker 1: which I see through immediately. Anytime Poppy does it, I
Speaker 1: just do it back to her. She'll be like and
Speaker 1: I go, I go, I get do that too. You're
Speaker 1: not It's not real. No one starts crying like that
Speaker 1: on a dime. Let's like work on your acting style
Speaker 1: to get things in life, because no one's gonna believe
Speaker 1: you going from smiling to right away. So I'll do
Speaker 1: it back to her and then it'll she'll like look
Speaker 1: at me like so confused. So I was giving him
Speaker 1: some of that bullshit. And then we get to the
Speaker 1: park and they're still crying and they're refusing to play
Speaker 1: in the park. They're just like ah, they're like stopping
Speaker 1: around and there's a whole park to be played with.
Speaker 1: I have the dog with me. Final thought, These little
Speaker 1: cute girls come up to me to like be like,
Speaker 1: can I pet your dog? And then they also want
Speaker 1: to play with Poppy, which is so adorable when kids
Speaker 1: come up and they're like can I play with you?
Speaker 1: Like so cute, and Poppy's just like now because she
Speaker 1: wants ice cream. And then they're petting the dog and
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, you know what, these are my new nieces.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna talk to these girls and they are sweet
Speaker 1: and they want to pet the dog and they're interested
Speaker 1: in the dog. So I'm just like, you know, I
Speaker 1: didn't do that, but I was trying to be like
Speaker 1: this gets rewarded. I'm like, yeah, you can meet them.
Speaker 1: Oh she really likes you, you know, like these girls
Speaker 1: are so cute, and they're looking at Poppy like she's
Speaker 1: like the cool girl because she's a little bit older
Speaker 1: than them, and Poppy's just like h And then Arlow
Speaker 1: is still just stomping around and it's getting the point
Speaker 1: where it's like, well, I'm gonna I go. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go because this isn't fun. And Lauren's like aunt Nikki's leaving.
Speaker 1: You guys are just being you're you're chasing her away,
Speaker 1: and I was like, you don't need to make it
Speaker 1: about that, like I just don't want to hang. This
Speaker 1: isn't fun, you guys, And I go, Arlow, here's the thing.
Speaker 1: He just you just put up a fight for us
Speaker 1: to go to the park because you wanted to play
Speaker 1: so badly, and then we did it, and now we're
Speaker 1: here and you're not even playing because you're worried about
Speaker 1: the ice cream. You ruined that you initially wanted the park,
Speaker 1: and you can get ice cream at home, and I
Speaker 1: know that sometimes if you cry enough you get ice cream,
Speaker 1: it's never gonna work this time. And he's like I'm
Speaker 1: going and I go, well, go barter something because you
Speaker 1: have no money and no funds and no one's gonna
Speaker 1: give you anything, So try to pick some rocks up
Speaker 1: or something, because maybe that guy will like exchange it
Speaker 1: for you. And so he goes shut up and like
Speaker 1: I didn't hear what he said because I was still
Speaker 1: talking to him, and my sister and Matt looked like shocked,
Speaker 1: and they go, you don't talk to her that way.
Speaker 1: And I was like, what do you say? And they
Speaker 1: were like, told you to shut up, and I was like,
Speaker 1: no way, and I was like I loved it because
Speaker 1: it told me that he looks. It's not good that
Speaker 1: he did it, but he talks to me the same
Speaker 1: way he talks to his parents. Thus he lacks respect
Speaker 1: for me much like he lacks respect for his parents.
Speaker 1: He loves me as much as he loves his like,
Speaker 1: because we all know how we talk to our parents.
Speaker 1: I used to tell my parents to shut up. That
Speaker 1: is not a good thing. I still probably do. I'm
Speaker 1: still I am a born and raised brat. Okay, I'm
Speaker 1: having a brat summer. I'm having a brat life. And
Speaker 1: I was a brat to my parents. I would tell
Speaker 1: them shut up. I would be like I hate you,
Speaker 1: I would storm off. I would say things that I
Speaker 1: remember my friends witnessing and being like, I could never
Speaker 1: talk to my mom that way because I wasn't scared
Speaker 1: of them, because they didn't actually like punish us, and
Speaker 1: I didn't respect them. I was a bad kid, But god,
Speaker 1: I would have never talked to my aunt or my
Speaker 1: or my grandma and grandpa the way I talk to
Speaker 1: my parents. It is a different thing entirely, or my
Speaker 1: teachers ever ever ever. But then so to me, that
Speaker 1: made me feel like I'm never gonna have kids, but
Speaker 1: at least my niece and nephew see me in the
Speaker 1: same way. They're close enough to me, not in an
Speaker 1: aunt way of like we have to be on our
Speaker 1: best behavior around her, like they I can get free
Speaker 1: with you. I feel, yeah, I have a relationship with
Speaker 1: them that is actually better than the one i had
Speaker 1: with my aunts and uncles. Even though I'm getting told
Speaker 1: to shut up and he did throw a pebble at
Speaker 1: my face in anger, and to be honest, I think, oh,
Speaker 1: they already are doing that. But I liked it because
Speaker 1: I was like, it's made me feel like their parent
Speaker 1: a little bit, like I'm dealing with the same stuff,
Speaker 1: and except that I literally go okay, Well, I'm leaving,
Speaker 1: and then I just started walking away, and then they
Speaker 1: started crying again because they do like when I come around.
Speaker 1: But it just felt good that that that happened, and
Speaker 1: you know, to defend them, Arlow and Poppy and Forrest,
Speaker 1: if you're listening in the future, I'm not mad that
Speaker 1: you tell me to shut up, or that you throw things,
Speaker 1: or that you cry when you don't get things, because
Speaker 1: if kid, I keep telling my parents, who are having
Speaker 1: frustration with it with them, if they had another thing
Speaker 1: to do instead of that, they would They don't, And
Speaker 1: it's not my sister's fault. It's not Matt's fault. It's
Speaker 1: like someone's dropping the ball somewhere along the line. We
Speaker 1: don't know where. But kids only you what they have,
Speaker 1: and if their only thing is to yell, shut up,
Speaker 1: they're gonna only use that. It's not like they're evil kids.
Speaker 1: They just don't have another thing. It's like their toolbox
Speaker 1: is empty. Yeah, there are other ways that they like
Speaker 1: kids talk that are their age, that aren't that, but
Speaker 1: they don't. They don't have it yet, And so I
Speaker 1: can't be mad at them, because I even said to Arlow, honestly,
Speaker 1: I would be so annoyed with my logic too. If
Speaker 1: I was him being like if I did an aunt
Speaker 1: being like just enjoy the thing that you wanted initially, like,
Speaker 1: I'd be like, shut the fuck up, Aunt, Nikki.
Speaker 2: So I kind of like, I go, I get it
Speaker 2: him like that. That's good parenting, Nikki.
Speaker 1: Thank you. I understood where he came from, and I yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's but it's it's. It is not easy. That
Speaker 1: is all I'll say about it. It is not easy
Speaker 1: being a parent. Shout out to parents of young kids, like,
Speaker 1: I see you. I want to hear your stories. If
Speaker 1: you have any tips for how my sister can get
Speaker 1: her kids to not like disobey. It's really hard because
Speaker 1: you know they It's like either having three kids screaming
Speaker 1: crying for hours or you give them the cookie they want.
Speaker 3: Or even even if they're not screaming and crying, even
Speaker 3: if they're just sitting in a carriage, it's hard. Like
Speaker 3: I have when my brother took my niece to the park.
Speaker 3: You have to have like you have to like pack
Speaker 3: like you're going on a weekend camping trip. Whenever you
Speaker 3: take the baby out of the ass. Yes, you have
Speaker 3: to apply sunscreen, like every ten minutes. You have to
Speaker 3: make sure that they have a little juice pouch or
Speaker 3: whatever those things are. You've got to have little naps,
Speaker 3: good way wipes.
Speaker 1: Because Brian, I will Brian is so funny. We will
Speaker 1: be like in the middle of a very important meeting
Speaker 1: with like executives, and He'll be will be looking at
Speaker 1: a new space where we're going to be doing this
Speaker 1: live show and meeting these people with their assignment. Brian's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I've got a question. He opens his fanny pack and
Speaker 1: pulls out a bag of nuts and it's pop bit
Speaker 1: nuts while he's talking to these Amazon exectives. So you
Speaker 1: loved bag nuts. You always have like a bagged snack. Sure,
Speaker 1: I feel like you would be you would be good
Speaker 1: at being apparent because you have like good supplies on you.
Speaker 3: Sure. Sure. I didn't even realize that.
Speaker 1: Was It wasn't a thing that I was like, Brian
Speaker 1: needs to clean up his act. I was just like,
Speaker 1: I want to be more like this, whereas just.
Speaker 3: Move past the idea that anyone's important.
Speaker 1: Oh get me there.
Speaker 3: Everyone's a human being. And at the end of the day,
Speaker 3: I'm sorry I said that, but ultimately everybody was a
Speaker 3: little baby in a carriage telling their aunt to shut up,
Speaker 3: and now they're just here for whatever reason. Yes, and
Speaker 3: whenever I meet someone who's like supposedly super important or whatever,
Speaker 3: I try to talk to them like they're just another
Speaker 3: human being, and that had that just eliminates this, like
Speaker 3: this whole facade that we're all putting on. Obviously, there
Speaker 3: are certain people who are more tough than others, and
Speaker 3: like if you like you have to walk on eggshells
Speaker 3: around certain people. But when it comes to like meeting
Speaker 3: important people, I just feel like, you're just a guy
Speaker 3: who like got a job.
Speaker 1: You're just a guy who's good at a sport. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and you're good at a sport because your body was
Speaker 1: born that way, and you like, it's just there's nothing.
Speaker 1: It's really funny when people are treated like roads because
Speaker 1: they're good at acting what right? But everything every person
Speaker 1: that is treated like that is because they are making
Speaker 1: people money. It's only that no one actually likes them
Speaker 1: more because of any other reason. Yes, there are people
Speaker 1: out there like Adam Sandler who both make people money
Speaker 1: and are nice people that people like to be around
Speaker 1: or whatever. But ultimately, no matter how nice Adam Sandler is.
Speaker 1: It does not matter. If he's not making people money,
Speaker 1: people would not want to be around him as much
Speaker 1: like people are upset. You can break down any person
Speaker 1: in a room, and I'm in a lot of rooms
Speaker 1: where there it's very clear who's the most important person.
Speaker 1: And I'm a person that has started making people money.
Speaker 1: And I see how much more people laugh at my
Speaker 1: jokes and like everything I say, And it's because I
Speaker 1: make the money. It's just so it's really pathetic when
Speaker 1: you think about it.
Speaker 3: But that is a distorted too. That's worth now you
Speaker 3: might not trust how people react anymore. Like eventually everyone
Speaker 3: everyone's giving you positive feedback because they fear.
Speaker 1: Oh, Debra Vance Season three hacks. She's on stage just
Speaker 1: doing premises and she goes, why are you laughing? Because
Speaker 1: she's so famous? Yeah, And that is something that a
Speaker 1: lot of people go through as comedians, where they just
Speaker 1: get so famous that anything they say gets to laugh
Speaker 1: and then eventually people catch on and go, you're what,
Speaker 1: You're not funny at all? All right, we got another
Speaker 1: episode to do that will come out tomorrow on the
Speaker 1: heels of this, so you'll hear more of this conversation
Speaker 1: right after this meaning tomorrow. Thank you for listening. Bestie's
Speaker 1: tour Date's coming up Hershey, Pennsylvania this weekend, somewhere else, Wilmington.
Speaker 1: Am I going to North Carolina?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: After Hershey, Pennsylvania, you will be in Fort Lauderdale?
Speaker 1: Wow?
Speaker 3: Real you though, I don't know if you will wait?
Speaker 1: Am I only in Hershey this weekend? You have? I'm
Speaker 1: in Syracuse, sorry, Syracuse Friday and Saturday, and then Hershey
Speaker 1: on Sunday. And then next week I I'm at Andrew's
Speaker 1: wedding and I'm going to Aristour. And then on Friday,
Speaker 1: the twenty fifth, I'm in Fort Lauderdale and I'm in
Speaker 1: Fort Myers on the twenty six.
Speaker 3: Those all those Florida things. I'm worried about Andrew's wedding,
Speaker 3: even because this hurricane is coming in home.
Speaker 1: Oh, I heard a meteorologists cry when I was talking
Speaker 1: about it. Did you see that? It was very upsetting?
Speaker 3: No? I mean this is the most powerful. This is
Speaker 3: as powerful a hurricane as you could possibly have on
Speaker 3: planet Earth.
Speaker 2: No, it's already gone down though I saw it to
Speaker 2: like I think category three.
Speaker 1: Oh really went down so rude that I just worry
Speaker 1: about the birds and animals that don't know what's going
Speaker 1: on and can't like pick up their nest and ant
Speaker 1: in birds, but they leave behind their babies. You can't
Speaker 1: fly with your babies.
Speaker 3: That's true, that the babies are gonna go, But the
Speaker 3: that's true.
Speaker 1: It makes me, I like, I can't handle it when
Speaker 1: I think I've been dreaming about drowning animals the past
Speaker 1: three nights because of this, because I just think anytime
Speaker 1: it rains or anything, I'm just thinking of like ant
Speaker 1: when there's a storm, but it's like blowing through. I'm
Speaker 1: just thinking of like an animal being like, oh, what's
Speaker 1: this gonna sup? You don't like if you walk in
Speaker 1: the rain to your car, how miserable you are. Can
Speaker 1: you imagine being a fucking animal and the only shelter
Speaker 1: you have is like some some leaves, and it's cold too,
Speaker 1: and there's no end in sight. There's no like, oh,
Speaker 1: as soon as I get this blanket or as soon
Speaker 1: as I get in like a hot shower, I'll be fine. Yeah,
Speaker 1: blows man.
Speaker 3: Yes, now that's true. I mean, I don't know how
Speaker 3: an animal feels when a storm comes, but I do
Speaker 3: know that animals have been in nature since the beginning
Speaker 3: of nature and must have a change. Well, now it's
Speaker 3: much worse. Well, but there's no Yeah, it's actually horrible.
Speaker 3: I actually have horrible, so much worse. I heard some
Speaker 3: horrible stories about when there were the forest fires in Colorado,
Speaker 3: about how the deer or whatever that is, and.
Speaker 1: We've got to go. Thank you so much for listening.
Speaker 1: I can't literally can't handle any story of animals being
Speaker 1: hurt or scared. But yeah, I'm sure it was. I'm
Speaker 1: sorry to cut you off. Really can't handle I'm sure,
Speaker 1: I'm sure. Oh dear, oh deers. Really pray for the deers,
Speaker 1: Pray for the animals, Pray for Florida. Pray that this
Speaker 1: thing fucking gets knocked down. Some miracle happens, and it
Speaker 1: keeps getting knocked down, and it comes through and it
Speaker 1: is just a slight, nice breeze and there's not twenty
Speaker 1: six trillion dollars. I think it was like something like
Speaker 1: one hundred and forty six billion dollars of damage in
Speaker 1: North Carolina. The thing about the North Carolina thing is
Speaker 1: no one in Ashville was ever scared of hurricanes. At
Speaker 1: least I would think the average person would be like,
Speaker 1: we're gonna be affected by a hurricane, not us worst.
Speaker 1: If you look at Ashland on a fucking map, y'all,
Speaker 1: and I did say, y'all, you would never think a
Speaker 1: hurricane could affect it. And I know it's because of
Speaker 1: the flooding up in the mount whatever, Like you would
Speaker 1: just not predict this. It's like it's coming for us
Speaker 1: all and all we have until that is podcasting, So
Speaker 1: we'll see you on tomorrow's don't be good bye. The
Speaker 1: Nicki Glazer Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big
Speaker 1: Money Players and iHeart Podcasts. Created and hosted by me
Speaker 1: Nicki Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie, Executive produced by
Speaker 1: Will Ferrell, Hans Sonni and Noah Avior. Edited it engineered
Speaker 1: by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton and music
Speaker 1: by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes of
Speaker 1: the Nicki Glazer podcast on YouTube, follow at Niki Glazer
Speaker 1: Pod and subscribe to our channel