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Speaker 1: All right, you guys, welcome to Horrible Decisions. My name

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Speaker 1: is Wheezy. Mandy is in l A right now, but

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Speaker 1: I'm here with two Levely guests. Um, I feel like

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Speaker 1: I should do some a kas because Mandy. I don't

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Speaker 1: do a ks, but Mandy does do y'all have an Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna try. I know what one of my AK

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Speaker 1: is going to be today. Well, I'm a self proclaimed imojo,

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Speaker 1: but you could call me pH Patty spiritual, gangster sensitive thing.

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Speaker 1: Mrs um what else I got? You definitely have a case.

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Speaker 1: That's it. Give me another one, Give me one, uh

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Speaker 1: trouble model good light skin Flynn. I'm calling it light

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Speaker 1: skin Flynn. I'm done. First of all, I Hope I

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Speaker 1: was on your team. Baby. So we got Tahoe in

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Speaker 1: the building. If you don't know his boys, um from

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Speaker 1: the So Shameless podcast, and we have a special guest here, Hope,

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Speaker 1: please introduce yourself to the pe was good? He was Goody.

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Speaker 1: My name is Hope. This guy to be at the

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Speaker 1: social media aka both Bitch in Training. Oh, everybody got

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Speaker 1: a K I gotta I gotta come up with something.

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Speaker 1: I don't have one because like I just did that

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Speaker 1: because Mandy and she always dow hers. I got nothing.

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Speaker 1: I got nothing. She's Pegg the Stallion. I'm partial. Pegger

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Speaker 1: might peg might not what we always have to talk

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Speaker 1: about Peggan, but that's her anyway, fun the Peggan Today

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Speaker 1: we aren't talking about Peggan today. Today is a very

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Speaker 1: special episode, um, because I'm sure it'll be someone in

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Speaker 1: the title, Um, we have a black trans woman in

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Speaker 1: the studio with us. I believe our last trans woman

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Speaker 1: that came to the studio was Latina, so I'm super excited.

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Speaker 1: She might have been after Latina. But I'm just super

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Speaker 1: excited to have Hope here. I met Hope in Tahoe's

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Speaker 1: Live I g live and they were having a great

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Speaker 1: dialogue going, and I'm just really excited for him to

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Speaker 1: be here because, Um, y'all might be tired of this nigga.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, you might be, but I feel like

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Speaker 1: having assists hetero supermask Brooklyn nigga is really vital to

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Speaker 1: the conversation because men like Tahoe not necessarily like you,

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Speaker 1: but now you didn't gotta clean it up, I mean

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Speaker 1: like someone that I mean. It was It was an

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Speaker 1: interesting live. We started and somebody came on Alive and

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Speaker 1: was like what is Oh, so their man had sex

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Speaker 1: with a dude before or something like that, and it

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Speaker 1: was like, is that gay? And so I started asking

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Speaker 1: the followers and one of my dude, he's from Harlem

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Speaker 1: and he's super hood. Yeah, yeo, that's gay. That's gay.

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Speaker 1: Is good. I was like, well, why is it gay?

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Speaker 1: If a dude could do it, if it's just one time,

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Speaker 1: he couldn't have been curious. We went into that. Then

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Speaker 1: a girl jumped in my homegirl Becca, and she was

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Speaker 1: super homophobic. It was I'm gonna be respectful when you

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Speaker 1: come on here, Becca, but I saw her using words

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Speaker 1: like shim Yeah. She was like she learned from a

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Speaker 1: lot from Well we spoke after this. She was like, Yo,

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Speaker 1: you know what I didn't think about things. Yo, we

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Speaker 1: all need a chance to have learning moments, and a

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Speaker 1: lot of this stuff we don't have that. Like literally,

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Speaker 1: people you're around the same type of thinging people all

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Speaker 1: the time, there are there's a very little chance for

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Speaker 1: you to have learning moments in the same crew. And

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Speaker 1: that's what today is so important because so many trans

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Speaker 1: women are dying and it is probably mean that you've

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Speaker 1: grown up with look like you can act like you

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Speaker 1: walk and talk like you. So I think it'll be

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Speaker 1: great to have this conversation and understand that trains women

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Speaker 1: are people. Black trains women are part of our Black

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Speaker 1: Lives Matter ship that we tweet about all day long,

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Speaker 1: and we just got to make sure that we're not

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Speaker 1: for the cause and being hypocrites at the same time.

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Speaker 1: I do it all the time. I'm talking about everybody,

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Speaker 1: but I've been trying. So, like I said, I was

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Speaker 1: talking about it um on my show I Believe and

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Speaker 1: I told Mouse was there and I was like, yo,

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Speaker 1: I'm holding phobic and he was like, you are not,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, yo, I kind of got to

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Speaker 1: own the fact that my mind still hasn't opened up

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Speaker 1: to fully understanding, of fully comprehending or fully accepting. But

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Speaker 1: I feel like you have to. You have to know

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Speaker 1: yourself on that because that way what you do that

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Speaker 1: you can say, all right, this is where I'm wrong

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Speaker 1: and that's where I want to be. But it's not

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Speaker 1: as easy just to say because you people still have

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Speaker 1: homeoph with tendencies. People still think a certain way. I

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Speaker 1: might be cool with hope, and then when my man

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Speaker 1: do something like, yeah, that's mad gay. Like you still

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Speaker 1: attributing bad to the word gay, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: So they still I mean, don't get me wrong, I've

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Speaker 1: had slip ups and things like that by like gay

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Speaker 1: and it's like culturally we say ship like that, but

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Speaker 1: by no means a by that person. I told a

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Speaker 1: joke on the show recently, I have gay friends, did you?

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Speaker 1: I might do that, but I'm not that person. I

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Speaker 1: go to fucking kind regards. I'm in Brooklyn, it's nine.

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Speaker 1: It was a heat wave. I think it was a

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Speaker 1: hundred degrees that night. So these niggas is kissing in

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Speaker 1: the club and I was staring at them right and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, yo, hot, this fun. I can't beleave these

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Speaker 1: niggas kissing. They're looking at me watch them kiss, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, no, it's not because you're gay.

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Speaker 1: I have gay friends. I'm totally everything. Just wanted to

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Speaker 1: fight me. Know. I felt so bad. No, no, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm well, but it's literally I like, you don't understand

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Speaker 1: have gay pride. I was that bit. I felt bad,

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Speaker 1: But anyway, let's hump into vanilla ship. Um So this

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Speaker 1: week I found this on Twitter. I don't know. If

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Speaker 1: you guys know who shann Booty is, do you? She's

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Speaker 1: a popular sexologist. Um, she's fucking dope. We've had her

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Speaker 1: on the show. New author of the book Game of

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Speaker 1: the Desire, she is a sexologist who uses vagina juice

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Speaker 1: as perfume and says it's a delicious secret. My ex

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Speaker 1: uster us has come the same line, where do you

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Speaker 1: put it like on his like temples, in the back

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Speaker 1: of his neck and like right around his hairline? And yes,

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Speaker 1: did you want to scream gay? That? I kind of

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Speaker 1: know when I'm not supposed to say nothing. So when

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Speaker 1: I saw the headline, I didn't know it's gonna be

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Speaker 1: my homegirl. But let's see, struggling to attract a mate,

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Speaker 1: have you considered a new look, maybe learned Spanish? Perhaps

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Speaker 1: you should just try rubbing pussy juice on your neck.

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Speaker 1: Sexologist Shannon Boo Drum claims that people have flocked to

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Speaker 1: her when she's wearing the bodily fragrance. In order to

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Speaker 1: test the theory, she had women that she was doing

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Speaker 1: a survey with going to a bar to connect with

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Speaker 1: strangers before gathering. They went into the toilets halfway through

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Speaker 1: the night. Um, basically to stick their fingers around their

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Speaker 1: vaginal opening. The goal is to get a sample from

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Speaker 1: the bartholonans grant ship Shann I'm sorry barthol loon in

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Speaker 1: glands which are the size of a p but they

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Speaker 1: play a large role in vaginal lubrication. Um. She concluded,

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure how effective this is. I'm certain that

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Speaker 1: every single single time I do, it makes me feel

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Speaker 1: like an enchanted goddess with a delicious secret. Um. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, but I will tell you they sell

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Speaker 1: pheromones in a spray that I just kind of feel like,

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Speaker 1: all right, you're in the club and you're walking around

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Speaker 1: smelling like pussy. Of course people are gonna be flocked

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Speaker 1: to you because you're making them think of fucking like

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Speaker 1: you smell like pussy. Why wouldn't not be attracted like you?

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Speaker 1: You're making me thinks. I don't think you distinctly smell.

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Speaker 1: It's I think it's like you don't know what you're smelling.

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Speaker 1: It's like almost like when I'm passing by like a

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Speaker 1: basketball court, right and I could smell the sweat or

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Speaker 1: like I'm it may not mean any smelling dick, but

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Speaker 1: it's like, oh, it feels I smell something musky, like

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Speaker 1: there's a I mean, we're fucking animals, nig there's a

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Speaker 1: difference between must like musty and like, no, no, we

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Speaker 1: like the not must Wait, you're telling me you don't

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Speaker 1: like you've never noticed a woman draw towards you or

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Speaker 1: your sweating. Oh yeah, because I look like an animal

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Speaker 1: at that moment when I'm sweating, I look like I'm

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Speaker 1: on some Yeah, I still got it in my hands. No,

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Speaker 1: I just picked my front. We smell of box? Okay,

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Speaker 1: do you like the smell of pussy? I love box,

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Speaker 1: but I'm in the I'm actually liking that person at

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Speaker 1: the time. Are you one of them niggas that like

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Speaker 1: like war smell pus like? I don't. I don't. I

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Speaker 1: don't know because everybody got their own smells, so I'm

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Speaker 1: kind of open. I know when it's not supposed to

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Speaker 1: smell like that, So I'm good on that as long

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Speaker 1: as I know what it's not right from fish other

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Speaker 1: than that shouldn't be fish ass. Things like that smell

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Speaker 1: like your ass. Something that smell ass. When the girl

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Speaker 1: took her drawers off before, what do you do? Do

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Speaker 1: you ever give a warning like or do you give it,

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Speaker 1: like the shower. Sometimes you and you're trying to like,

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Speaker 1: oh man, because sometimes you don't want to hurt somebody feeling.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes you think maybe it's just you, it's just this

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Speaker 1: kind of but then you realize that it's not right.

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Speaker 1: Something right and your body, my body, I'm older, my

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Speaker 1: body reacts like that. It just takes one thing and

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Speaker 1: I'm off. I'm not coming back. When's the last time

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Speaker 1: you had to do it? Say it? Well, that was

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Speaker 1: the last time it was it was recently. What do

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Speaker 1: you say? Oh, I don't know, I'm drunk, That's what

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Speaker 1: I said, because my sip wasn't get hard. You didn't

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Speaker 1: tell her to shower. No, I don't want to. I

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Speaker 1: don't want to. Yeah, it's dub and it was it

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Speaker 1: wasn't my girl, and nobody's just run off. Yeah, so

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Speaker 1: it's kind of like, all right, this ain't gonna work

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Speaker 1: for us. Have you had to tell someone they was saying,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, when I was in college, I just told

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Speaker 1: this story on my my I g lads the other

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Speaker 1: day a little pizza. It was like a little piece

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Speaker 1: of trade. He comes into my room, like I got

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Speaker 1: to just getting off of the basketball court, smelling like

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Speaker 1: straight dicking ass and I was like, oh no, you

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Speaker 1: gotta go shower, and like Homie was just in his feelings.

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Speaker 1: He was like, you really going to make me shower?

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Speaker 1: Like I think it's like do you want it to

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Speaker 1: go on my mouth? But that's what I'm saying. Like women,

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Speaker 1: they're like salt like salt man. That okay, that first

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Speaker 1: of all, you'll are very unhealthy walking about seasoning period.

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Speaker 1: But I'm just saying women like especially after basketball, like

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Speaker 1: you said, they're sweat and all that, they'd be like

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Speaker 1: I've had a woman, you know moment, but you know,

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Speaker 1: you know I'm gonna work for sanitation, right women, I've

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Speaker 1: had women do me like, I want you to come

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Speaker 1: have sex with me in your uniform? Y'all have this

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Speaker 1: most sanitary people in the world. Hold on, hold on,

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Speaker 1: hold on, hold on. They've said I want to have

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Speaker 1: some in your garbage. Man has had a message from

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Speaker 1: a woman that said I want you to suck me

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Speaker 1: in your uniform? Or did she say I want you

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Speaker 1: to suck me like in your uniform, Because maybe it's

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Speaker 1: like a uniform fantasy, right, that's possible. That's possible. It

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Speaker 1: better not be a garbage. That's the case. Stand outside

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Speaker 1: on the corner and I said, I said that, like,

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Speaker 1: that's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard in my life.

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Speaker 1: Let me ask, what's the weirdest thing has something ever

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Speaker 1: like squirted on you. I've had maggots, roaches all that

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Speaker 1: ship on me. It's disgusting. It ain't no way they

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Speaker 1: pay you a lot though. I kicked the rat one day.

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Speaker 1: The rat ran out from under the bag and I

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Speaker 1: kicked it, and I didn't realize that there was a

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Speaker 1: car open with the sunroof ship it landed on, so

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Speaker 1: rats can't take kicks, so it died like on the way,

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Speaker 1: but it landed on the sunroof, like right there with

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Speaker 1: the dude in the car. He's good. I didn't know.

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Speaker 1: I just seen. Oh we've seen a kind of ship.

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Speaker 1: How long you working for the Deportment Sanitation Um? So

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Speaker 1: our King of the week this week, if you guys

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Speaker 1: have never heard our show, we pick a particular king

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Speaker 1: that you may never heard of, or you might actually

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Speaker 1: do yourself. This one is a little weird, but I

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Speaker 1: actually found it in a porn category. Word. We all

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Speaker 1: know guns as phallic shaped instruments usually display power It's

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Speaker 1: no surprise that guns are heavily fetishized, although for obvious reason,

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Speaker 1: exploring this fetish has an accompanying accompanying degree of risk attached.

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Speaker 1: There's an endless kidnapping and rate fantasy porn on the

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Speaker 1: Internet that features guys and girls being forced into sex

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Speaker 1: at gunpoint. I'm that's me. I'm in the wait you

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Speaker 1: said that's me. That's me. Now I'm be weird with you.

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Speaker 1: I'm not attractive, like putting no gun on me, but

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Speaker 1: I do like when nigs like have guns. It makes

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Speaker 1: me feel safelous. Give me like, don't give me like

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Speaker 1: a Trump supporter, like you know what I'm saying, You

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Speaker 1: got a permit gun, Give me a nig saying that

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Speaker 1: makes me feel like, oh my god, bibe got me.

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Speaker 1: But I feel like if you got like went to

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Speaker 1: school for your gun and did a test, like you

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Speaker 1: might shoot me and blame it on that ship, you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean. But like a niggad it just

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Speaker 1: got his ship. I don't know what it is. You

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Speaker 1: picked it up from your cousin, baby. And I'm kind

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Speaker 1: of good on woman because I was playing with a

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Speaker 1: woman that said that she was going to pop up

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Speaker 1: at my crib and so I got a little baby

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Speaker 1: gun I found while I was working. So I got

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Speaker 1: a BB gun and I sent her a picture to

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Speaker 1: BB gun and she sent me a picture of the

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Speaker 1: biggest gun I've ever seen in my life. And she

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Speaker 1: was like, you don't want no smoke. I was like,

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Speaker 1: I felt like I felt like she had a big

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Speaker 1: addicting Yeah. I I was just kidding, was the biggest

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Speaker 1: guy and she's just holding this ship. I'm like, what

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Speaker 1: the I mean? Good though, you send me a gun

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Speaker 1: talking about I'm not now. I'm from Florida, so like

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Speaker 1: everybody has a gun where you from Miami? Okay, so

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Speaker 1: like everybody has a gun, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: But in New York when niggas have I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: that's not legal anything else. That's why I really like

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Speaker 1: to go about bote. You know, niggas getting real. Once

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Speaker 1: I get to like Dike minudte ship, I was like,

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Speaker 1: this suck ship, like niggas that don't speak English, and

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Speaker 1: I know they're still like if I don't know what

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Speaker 1: you're saying and you're still scaring me, that's too much. Um,

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Speaker 1: So let's deep dive right into it. So first I

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Speaker 1: want to start with Chyle, just to see what you

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Speaker 1: think your orientation, your prone and your pronouns are. Can

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Speaker 1: you tell us that what do you mean? So that's

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Speaker 1: what start as far as what okay, what's your sexual orientation? Though? Um, heterosexual? Okay,

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Speaker 1: good thinking about sists and stuff like that. So I'm right,

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Speaker 1: I'm assist gender straighter, hetero sexual black man. These people

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Speaker 1: used to when they're trying to dispete. We're gonna talk

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Speaker 1: about that in a minute, because I'm tired of nig

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Speaker 1: saying that ship it's true. Anytime they're using that, they're

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Speaker 1: talking down on people. That's another way saying it's bastard use.

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Speaker 1: That's when they use it on internet they let sick.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna talk about why that's problematic, but go ahead,

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Speaker 1: Oh what are your pronouns and your sexual orientation? So

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Speaker 1: she heard hers and I'm paying sexual pan sexual? What

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Speaker 1: are your How old are you? By the way, six her,

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Speaker 1: she her, hers, she her hers people. I believe she

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Speaker 1: her and there's she knows, So day them is a

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Speaker 1: completely different for comple people. Um, but she her and hers.

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Speaker 1: It's just like the way you would address somebody in conversation.

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Speaker 1: So that's right. I went to the movies with her,

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Speaker 1: she left her things in my car. That's hers now,

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Speaker 1: so I'll do she hurt and I'll say they just

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Speaker 1: piss niggers off. Okay, So not to be offensive. Real question,

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Speaker 1: if a guy looks at you and no notices that

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Speaker 1: you are naturally a man, is that the right way

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Speaker 1: to say it? If you're a man? If he sees

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Speaker 1: a man when sees you, and he says he when

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Speaker 1: referring to you, that's offensive. Now. See. I I have

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Speaker 1: my own struggle with that when I first started transitioning

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Speaker 1: and I was I remember being in a place where

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Speaker 1: I remember telling my best friend's mom because she made

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Speaker 1: a mistake one day when we were like having casual conversations.

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Speaker 1: She's like, yeah, boy, and I was like, no, it's

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Speaker 1: okay because if that's what you see, and she's like no,

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Speaker 1: like and she corrected me, and she's like no, like,

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Speaker 1: this is what you're presenting and this is what you're

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Speaker 1: gonna grow into, and so I'm gonna respect that. But

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Speaker 1: that's always been like a weird line for me because

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Speaker 1: I'm like, if that is what people see, right, and

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Speaker 1: they're not being rude, like it's legitimately because with the

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Speaker 1: way that people are dressing up these days, you don't

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Speaker 1: know if it's just like a guy being feminine or

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Speaker 1: what anymore. And so it's like, if that's what you see,

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Speaker 1: then say like, I think that it's better to just

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Speaker 1: recursor it with like they and them and then ask

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Speaker 1: people or just to be like, what's your name, like

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Speaker 1: just to avoid the idea of So I was told

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Speaker 1: by a good gay friend of mine, Christopher. He said,

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Speaker 1: I address people how they're presenting. She has makeup on,

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Speaker 1: she has long hair, titties, I'm gonna go with. Now

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Speaker 1: there's that's what I want to talk about. So there's

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Speaker 1: a few terms I wrote down that I want to

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Speaker 1: kind of dive into and if you can help us, hope. Um.

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Speaker 1: Some are slurs like transvestite I've heard years ago. I

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Speaker 1: don't hear that word anymore, but I want to talk

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Speaker 1: about those as well. So can we first discuss um

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Speaker 1: if you could tell the people gender versus sex? Because

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Speaker 1: he said I know her gender, I don't know her.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna act like I don't know, but you didn't.

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't get none of this. Terms like

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Speaker 1: even the gender versus sex. So the gender is what

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Speaker 1: you are, all right, gender is time presenting. Now, my

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Speaker 1: sex is what I was assigned at birth. That's like

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Speaker 1: when I came out, they smacked me on the It's like,

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Speaker 1: this is what they said based on what was between

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Speaker 1: my legs. And so those are the two different things,

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Speaker 1: but generous how somebody is presenting right now, So I

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Speaker 1: can assume that you're a man based off the way

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Speaker 1: that you're presenting. I consume that Weezy as a woman

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Speaker 1: based on the way that she's presenting. If they dressed

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Speaker 1: like that, it's still a woman because she's my thing

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Speaker 1: is she's a stud is still somebody who is a

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Speaker 1: woman presenting masculinely, but it is still the undertone of

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Speaker 1: that is a woman who was presenting in a masculine fashion,

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Speaker 1: much like a gay man who might wear lip gloss

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Speaker 1: or heels. But he's a man, right, Like he's still

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Speaker 1: got feared maybe or what if you were born a

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Speaker 1: guy and you had the surgery and everything. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: So he so he's trying to say, I hear what

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Speaker 1: you're saying. Um, When he brought up stud right, men

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Speaker 1: women that are transitioning, you can tell a little bit more.

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Speaker 1: They're growing facial hair, like you could kind of see

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Speaker 1: that happening. Most studs I've noticed don't have a changing

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Speaker 1: voice yet, Like they don't try to come off as

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Speaker 1: men yet they try to come off as butch. So

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Speaker 1: that's what I've gathered from that, much like gay men,

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Speaker 1: And correct me if I'm wrong. You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: They might wear makeup class certain tight shirts or whatever,

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Speaker 1: but they're not wearing wigs or trying to look like

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Speaker 1: women or bras. There just may have some feminine attributes,

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Speaker 1: much like studs may have masculine attributes, So the dressing

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Speaker 1: does not change. Sex would be sis male. I have

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Speaker 1: so many questions. My my, my sex would be cis male.

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Speaker 1: Now do you know the difference between when we say

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Speaker 1: female and woman? No, I think it's not the same

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Speaker 1: thing versus or is it animals. We first started the show,

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Speaker 1: Sam White came on um who's a white guy activist

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Speaker 1: for black people, and he said something about how he

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Speaker 1: wasn't trying to say females anymore. This is two and

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Speaker 1: a half years ago, and I was like, you don'body

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Speaker 1: care because I didn't know female defines you about your genitalia.

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Speaker 1: Woman defines you by your gender and how you're presenting. Right,

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Speaker 1: So that's why some women don't have vaginas. What do

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Speaker 1: you mean they don't have Females have vaginam All females

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Speaker 1: have vaginas, have vaginas. Women. Oh, they present as a woman.

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Speaker 1: So even though they have different body parts, because she's

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Speaker 1: presenting herself as a woman, then that's how you address

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Speaker 1: and look at you gold stars point all right, um,

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Speaker 1: now gender during Since we got through that sexual orientation,

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Speaker 1: can I ask a difficult question? Are we sure we're ready?

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Speaker 1: Are we supposed? How are people supposed to notice? Like?

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Speaker 1: How it in? It? Like? It seems to me that

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Speaker 1: in homophobia or people who don't engage age in the

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Speaker 1: active a task of understanding learning everything right is based

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Speaker 1: on ignorance. Homophoonies based on how are they supposed to

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Speaker 1: know all this stuff? Because people get mad at you

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Speaker 1: for saying the wrong thing. I mean here, we're open here,

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Speaker 1: people are supposed to know. But I think right now,

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Speaker 1: after this you should know better. Right, Oh yeah, I'm

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Speaker 1: doing my best, and the people that are listening this week,

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Speaker 1: they don't know better after this but I think it

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Speaker 1: just takes that teaching moment. I mean, how do you

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Speaker 1: feel about that question, like are you because I know

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Speaker 1: you go through some ship. I know you go through

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Speaker 1: some ship, and I know it's like super So I

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Speaker 1: want to address that it's the assumption that I do

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Speaker 1: go through some ship, right, because essentially no. But it's

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Speaker 1: important that we talk about this because I think what

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Speaker 1: I don't want you to do, and what I don't

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Speaker 1: want a lot of people to do, is think that

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Speaker 1: we're hung up on the nuances. But we all hung

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Speaker 1: up on the hung up on the nuances. It's like,

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Speaker 1: as a black woman and as black people, we know

400
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Speaker 1: when white people are saying something but not saying something right,

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Speaker 1: And so as a trans person, I know when you're

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Speaker 1: saying something but not saying something, or I can assume

403
00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,199
Speaker 1: when you're saying something but not saying something. What did

404
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:05,440
Speaker 1: you think? So? But mainly because you're black, but mostly

405
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Speaker 1: because he's a man, right, and I feel like he

406
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Speaker 1: comes from a group of people that have taught him

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Speaker 1: to feel a certain type of way about me, And

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Speaker 1: so that comment came off as I know you, I

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Speaker 1: know you go through some stuff, which means that I

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Speaker 1: know that your trans and I know that people know

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Speaker 1: that you trans, so I know you're going through on

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Speaker 1: the street. So you're basically saying you ain't possible, and

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Speaker 1: I know I would know you. But we had a

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Speaker 1: conversation together and I felt the anger um coming from

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Speaker 1: you from this situation, So that's why I said that.

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Speaker 1: But I understand your point because I do come off

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Speaker 1: that way and I do represent that, so I'm not

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Speaker 1: going to run from that. But just between you and I,

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Speaker 1: that was only because we had that conversation and we

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Speaker 1: got to that point. Was he right? Listen, I respect you,

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Speaker 1: I respect everything. But that's where that came from. It

422
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:53,359
Speaker 1: really wasn't from a judgment place. And I'm here, you know,

423
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:57,119
Speaker 1: I want to talk about the word pass um, so

424
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:02,119
Speaker 1: in this room I want say it. But yeah, I

425
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:07,399
Speaker 1: do think I hope it's passing. I mean I for sure,

426
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:11,400
Speaker 1: and not everyone is, which really puts their lives at risk. However,

427
00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:13,920
Speaker 1: I want to talk about how passing is not a compliment.

428
00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:17,639
Speaker 1: Can you talk about that for us? And how someone's saying, wow,

429
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:20,440
Speaker 1: you really look like a girl is sucked up to me.

430
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:22,880
Speaker 1: It's it's a big issue because what it's saying is like,

431
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:25,399
Speaker 1: you're validating me and how you feel or how you

432
00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:27,119
Speaker 1: think you should respect me based on the way that

433
00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:29,320
Speaker 1: I look versus based on based on me being a

434
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:32,240
Speaker 1: human being. Right, So it's like people will choose to

435
00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:34,359
Speaker 1: respect you based on the fact that you passed. So

436
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:39,040
Speaker 1: how did my had I been being rains in a

437
00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:42,479
Speaker 1: wig right here? Your seat might be next to wheezy

438
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:47,320
Speaker 1: right now because of because of the way that because

439
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:49,440
Speaker 1: you can still tell that it's being rams or whatever.

440
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:51,239
Speaker 1: But then it's also like an insult because it's just

441
00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 1: like saying, like, oh my god, you are so I

442
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:55,840
Speaker 1: can't believe that you used to be because there's this

443
00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:59,280
Speaker 1: ideology that all trans women look like being rains in

444
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,119
Speaker 1: a wig. There's this idea that we're not supposed to

445
00:23:01,119 --> 00:23:03,960
Speaker 1: be attractive, we're not supposed to be wanted or you know,

446
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:07,120
Speaker 1: sought after, and that's just not true. But don't bring

447
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:09,679
Speaker 1: me down to my looks either. I want to ask another.

448
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:11,760
Speaker 1: So I'm just going to be the uncomfortable guy. Can

449
00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:14,359
Speaker 1: I use that as an uncomfortable questions too? But but

450
00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:16,600
Speaker 1: I feel like hope is open enough, and I feel

451
00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 1: like these questions I don't wonder what we miss do

452
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:24,720
Speaker 1: you identify as trans? Yes? Okay, so once you identify

453
00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:28,800
Speaker 1: as trans, why is it offensive if somebody else identifies

454
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:31,640
Speaker 1: you as trains in a way. That's a great question.

455
00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:34,320
Speaker 1: Boom boom boom. And it's something that I've actually been

456
00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:36,600
Speaker 1: pondering with with myself for the last couple of weeks.

457
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:39,240
Speaker 1: That's with a new question because um, a college professor

458
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:40,959
Speaker 1: of mind tuned into one of my videos and she's like,

459
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:43,919
Speaker 1: you know, when are you going to stop identifying as

460
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:46,040
Speaker 1: a trans woman and just be a woman? And that

461
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,159
Speaker 1: question ate my ass up because I was like, but

462
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:50,560
Speaker 1: I'm an activist and I'm trying to you know whatever,

463
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:52,359
Speaker 1: and she was just like, yeah, but you can be

464
00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:55,440
Speaker 1: an activist and still just like whatever. But it's also

465
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:57,920
Speaker 1: one of those things where I think for women whose

466
00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:00,760
Speaker 1: sole goal, right my my sole goal in this life

467
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:02,720
Speaker 1: isn't a past. But there are some girls who literally

468
00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:06,000
Speaker 1: are just transitioning just to blend in and not have

469
00:24:06,080 --> 00:24:08,200
Speaker 1: to deal with any of the transgressions of trans folks.

470
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:09,520
Speaker 1: And they want to live in stealth and that's just

471
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:12,119
Speaker 1: how they want to live, and so it's important for

472
00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:14,880
Speaker 1: them to pass because passing means that they've achieved that goal.

473
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 1: Passing means that I don't have to deal with Nigga's

474
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:19,280
Speaker 1: bothering me on the street. It means that I can

475
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:21,359
Speaker 1: get a job. It means that healthcare will be afforded

476
00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:23,400
Speaker 1: to me on certain spaces just based on the way

477
00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:25,560
Speaker 1: that I look. And so it's important to pass because

478
00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:26,840
Speaker 1: when I go to the airport, I don't have to

479
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,080
Speaker 1: worry about like that weird awkward thing when I get

480
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:31,240
Speaker 1: t s a checked, or I don't have to worry

481
00:24:31,240 --> 00:24:33,399
Speaker 1: about being in an acting class and doing a kissing

482
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:35,280
Speaker 1: scene with everybody in the room knowing what I'm transis,

483
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:37,560
Speaker 1: so nobody wants to be my partner. It's about there's

484
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:40,399
Speaker 1: a bunch of nuances that go on, but passing, and

485
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:44,600
Speaker 1: so it's important for some people because passing takes away turmoil.

486
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:49,160
Speaker 1: I gotta go. I gotta go with this because when

487
00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:54,239
Speaker 1: we say passing, um and maybe you've never heard that term,

488
00:24:54,280 --> 00:24:56,800
Speaker 1: but no, I do. I get it. But then and

489
00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:59,399
Speaker 1: then we're not identifying as trans because we want to

490
00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 1: go to full route right, you want to you want

491
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:03,960
Speaker 1: to wind up on the other side. I'm fully here.

492
00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 1: I don't have to worry about being uh for for

493
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:12,320
Speaker 1: anything else. I'm here, you identify me as this when

494
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:14,639
Speaker 1: you see me. Nobody wants to say trans to me,

495
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 1: I'm a woman, right part of me for anything that

496
00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:19,239
Speaker 1: might have said that was wrong there. But then you

497
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:23,040
Speaker 1: have the people who, if they would find out that

498
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:28,960
Speaker 1: you've passed, feel tricked because you have gotten now I

499
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:33,360
Speaker 1: want to talk about I think that's great. M one

500
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 1: with dating insects and the other with work and other

501
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:41,720
Speaker 1: things that she should have. Big fan of pose. There's

502
00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:45,120
Speaker 1: episode imposed where she she wants to run a nail

503
00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:50,120
Speaker 1: shop and she does. She was passing to the person

504
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 1: who rented it. Now the guy, the woman's son who

505
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:57,520
Speaker 1: you know, found out, he was like, oh that's a man.

506
00:25:57,680 --> 00:26:00,400
Speaker 1: Ma gave her her money back, was like, you can't

507
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:03,640
Speaker 1: have the store here. Now that's a big fucking deal,

508
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:06,879
Speaker 1: right because it's like, I don't owe you ship, Nigga,

509
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:09,000
Speaker 1: I'm fucking putting my money up to rent this place.

510
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:12,000
Speaker 1: Who gives a fuck? What's here? What I used to be.

511
00:26:12,359 --> 00:26:15,760
Speaker 1: You shouldn't worry about that ship right now. To me,

512
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:20,159
Speaker 1: you don't need to tricks Like tricking is not the issue,

513
00:26:20,359 --> 00:26:22,920
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. For getting a job, you

514
00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, she's just saying she's managing a

515
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 1: retail store, like being tricked to fucking manage that ship.

516
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:30,080
Speaker 1: Like that's fucked up. Oh you know what, maybe we

517
00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:32,680
Speaker 1: shouldn't have put you as a face front for customers

518
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 1: because you're a trans woman. Can't do that. Fuck that

519
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:38,760
Speaker 1: for work, but for sex? Now do you agree with me? There?

520
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:42,480
Speaker 1: Um no? Why not? And the reason why I don't

521
00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:46,520
Speaker 1: it's because if we're gonna normalize this, was not saying

522
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 1: it isn't normal already. I'm so scared to say to

523
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,359
Speaker 1: the own thing. But I'm not saying it isn't normal already,

524
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:53,119
Speaker 1: because it's normal for you and it's normal for the

525
00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:55,399
Speaker 1: trans community. But if we're gonna say that it's just

526
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:58,119
Speaker 1: as normal as homosexual, just as normal as hetero sexual,

527
00:26:58,359 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 1: then I identifying as trans in the moment, if that's

528
00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:07,440
Speaker 1: what it takes to me, is important because once you're

529
00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:14,440
Speaker 1: saying that, you're saying it's necessary. No no, no, no no, see,

530
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:16,320
Speaker 1: And I get that, I get that, I get what

531
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 1: you're saying. No, because nobody's gonna ask you if you're

532
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,040
Speaker 1: a woman, or nobody to ask you if you're a man.

533
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:24,040
Speaker 1: Exactly why One, they're worried about healthcare. Oh my god,

534
00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:26,000
Speaker 1: you know my sis is gonna cost too. They're gonna

535
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:27,840
Speaker 1: be worried she's an HR issue because someone's going to

536
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:30,919
Speaker 1: talk about her. Three, they're gonna worry about clientele and

537
00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:32,760
Speaker 1: if how this is going to make the company. Look

538
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:37,159
Speaker 1: it's always a probibility, which is which is uh, that's

539
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:38,600
Speaker 1: a lawsuit, but you have to know it's not. In

540
00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:41,159
Speaker 1: thirty two states, trans people can legally be fired just

541
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:43,520
Speaker 1: because they find out that you're trans. Shut the funk

542
00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 1: up thirty two states. I literally, if if I walk

543
00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:50,440
Speaker 1: in I passed, I get the job, and somebody starts, oh,

544
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:53,080
Speaker 1: I follow hop on Instagram she's an amazing transactivist. My

545
00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:55,880
Speaker 1: boss can give me my walking papers the next day

546
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 1: and not even tell me that that's why it is.

547
00:27:57,880 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 1: Let's be. They don't even have to say, like, that's

548
00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:03,959
Speaker 1: why it is. Now how you feel, nigger? Like when

549
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:06,360
Speaker 1: they write up their paperwork, they can tell HR like, oh,

550
00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:08,000
Speaker 1: we just felt like it was like all of those

551
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:10,639
Speaker 1: things that we just listed are valid reasons that they

552
00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:12,240
Speaker 1: can say this is why we fired her. Do you

553
00:28:12,320 --> 00:28:14,840
Speaker 1: remember when the whole thing which Trump happened with the

554
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 1: military and trans people. You know why. The main reason

555
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:21,320
Speaker 1: for that was because of the cost for transitioning drugs.

556
00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:23,000
Speaker 1: They don't want to spend money on it, but they

557
00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:26,080
Speaker 1: spend two point five billion dollars on diacra. We already know.

558
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:30,639
Speaker 1: Really yeah, we feel jet it costs more than transitioning

559
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,160
Speaker 1: drugs for anyone in the millinaritary like times a hundred

560
00:28:33,520 --> 00:28:36,040
Speaker 1: or some ship like that. But point being like, it's

561
00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:41,040
Speaker 1: always this really like asinine, small minuscule excuse to just

562
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 1: not say what you want to say. Okay, So where

563
00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:47,840
Speaker 1: I'm going with that is, Okay, the owner of the

564
00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:52,600
Speaker 1: nail salon is extremely homophobic, or always said because I

565
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:54,320
Speaker 1: didn't I don't watch polls. I've been scarped to watch

566
00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:57,800
Speaker 1: trans So there's there's different because there are people who

567
00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:00,440
Speaker 1: are cool with gay folks. We see it all the

568
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:02,760
Speaker 1: time in black culture. Black men are fine with lesbians

569
00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:05,200
Speaker 1: and studs and all types of But I don't be real,

570
00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:10,400
Speaker 1: I've seen but trans women scared. Trans women is just

571
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:13,560
Speaker 1: an off limits off the unless and I've seen this

572
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,840
Speaker 1: thing in the hood. If she grew up in that hood,

573
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:20,920
Speaker 1: then she's the only one that can come. And why

574
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:23,120
Speaker 1: from the point of view. For me, I think that

575
00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:26,560
Speaker 1: it's always that thing of like being afraid of the unknown. Right,

576
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 1: if we watch Cookie grow up from LaMotte, then Cookie

577
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:33,840
Speaker 1: is the hoods And I mean for I'm very I'm

578
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,800
Speaker 1: very transparent because I know how the world is. Right,

579
00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 1: So if if Cookie is the hood training, right, we

580
00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:41,800
Speaker 1: all know Cookie, we know what Cookie is working with,

581
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:43,760
Speaker 1: then there's nothing to be afraid of because nobody knows.

582
00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:47,520
Speaker 1: Nobody's gonna mistakenly touch Cookie. But if Mariah comes in

583
00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:50,080
Speaker 1: and we don't know, then somebody can make the mistake

584
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 1: at the party, and that's scary. Scary. Now that scy Okay,

585
00:29:56,240 --> 00:29:58,560
Speaker 1: So we got the unemployment we got because now as

586
00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 1: a man, you're you're you, you you questioning your own self,

587
00:30:01,840 --> 00:30:06,720
Speaker 1: you got people questioning you. I want to move past

588
00:30:06,760 --> 00:30:09,040
Speaker 1: the employment things. Do you understand now, her renting an apartment,

589
00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:11,640
Speaker 1: why she don't need to tell anybody her getting a job? Now?

590
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:14,400
Speaker 1: Are we clear with that? Why? So it wasn't that

591
00:30:14,440 --> 00:30:18,320
Speaker 1: she for her, it was more like fighting the transphobia

592
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:21,760
Speaker 1: and the other person because obviously that person has issues

593
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:24,160
Speaker 1: and you know what, I help you don't really have

594
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:26,960
Speaker 1: the skill. So what how do we move forward with that?

595
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:29,960
Speaker 1: Like if we just said, you know what, nobody ever

596
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:32,080
Speaker 1: has to know anything or nobody has to deal with

597
00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:34,560
Speaker 1: their own transphobia. But my thing is is my thing

598
00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:36,160
Speaker 1: is there are people that are drumming pulpes that wouldn't

599
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,040
Speaker 1: hire somebody who had HIV and AIDS, but they're not

600
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,120
Speaker 1: being forced to disclose that. People don't feel some type

601
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:41,960
Speaker 1: of way if you don't like, people feel some type

602
00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:43,480
Speaker 1: of way, but if they find out, they're not going

603
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:45,680
Speaker 1: to necessarily fire you. It's just like, oh, you know,

604
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:48,440
Speaker 1: she got AIDS, but this is about to be my favorite,

605
00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:50,640
Speaker 1: so you know. It's It's one of those things where

606
00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:54,120
Speaker 1: I sit back and I asked, like, if that's the requirement,

607
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 1: then everybody who you're dating, they should be forced to.

608
00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,920
Speaker 1: Like I think that the thing is, it's the idea

609
00:31:00,280 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 1: of the rate and the time frame for exposing for

610
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,280
Speaker 1: trans women that we are like forced to like the

611
00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:07,240
Speaker 1: second that I Nigga sits down at the bar, looks

612
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,040
Speaker 1: at you, winks one time you gotta be like, I'm

613
00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:12,640
Speaker 1: trans And it's just like like that that ship is fucking.

614
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 1: It is annoying and it's confusing, and it's it really

615
00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:19,360
Speaker 1: hinders you from feeling like a person because I feel

616
00:31:19,360 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 1: like I can never have a good conversation. Is I

617
00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: can never accept a drink. I want to talk about

618
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:26,160
Speaker 1: what y'all both got into, and this is a great

619
00:31:26,160 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 1: segue into this. Now I feel like obviously we get

620
00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:34,880
Speaker 1: all agree. I'm clearly a fucking ally. But I will

621
00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 1: say I do believe people um should at least have

622
00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:41,680
Speaker 1: a choice. I don't I agree. I don't think you

623
00:31:41,680 --> 00:31:43,600
Speaker 1: need to tell someone sitting at the bar. I don't

624
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:46,120
Speaker 1: even know how I'm feeling young about a dating profile.

625
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:48,280
Speaker 1: I still don't know. I don't feel like you need

626
00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:50,160
Speaker 1: to have that. But I want to talk about you

627
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:53,000
Speaker 1: said something about walking down the street. You guys got

628
00:31:53,040 --> 00:31:55,000
Speaker 1: into an argument on I g live. A lot of

629
00:31:55,040 --> 00:32:00,280
Speaker 1: women lose their lives. It was a debate. Debate was right,

630
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:02,440
Speaker 1: it was good, it was good, and you were respectful

631
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:04,480
Speaker 1: in that too. I think I want to start talking

632
00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:08,000
Speaker 1: about dating. How do you go about dating? When do

633
00:32:08,080 --> 00:32:10,440
Speaker 1: you say it? First date? How does it go? I mean,

634
00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:14,600
Speaker 1: that's private, it's your genitaliat I've interviewed people that have

635
00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 1: an STD. They say they don't say it right until

636
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:21,320
Speaker 1: they're about to have sex, Like that's your I don't know,

637
00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:23,760
Speaker 1: let's talk about it. Everybody has different stuff. My thing

638
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:25,719
Speaker 1: is And it's funny that you mentioned dating profiles. It's

639
00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:28,440
Speaker 1: on all of my dating profiles. Um, And it didn't

640
00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:30,000
Speaker 1: used to be because I used to like to disclose

641
00:32:30,040 --> 00:32:32,000
Speaker 1: on the first message, like I still like to disclose

642
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:33,720
Speaker 1: fairly early. But now I put it on my dating

643
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:37,160
Speaker 1: profile because I was getting so many messages and this

644
00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:38,600
Speaker 1: is not like me to my own horn. But it's

645
00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:41,200
Speaker 1: like the second I would make a tender, whatever the

646
00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 1: funk I was making, it would be like like a

647
00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:46,480
Speaker 1: flood of sucking messages and then I would have to

648
00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:48,400
Speaker 1: tell every single one of them I'm trans. Some trans

649
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:50,000
Speaker 1: on trains and then it would either be the block

650
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:52,120
Speaker 1: train or the oh you can steck my dig train.

651
00:32:52,760 --> 00:32:59,640
Speaker 1: And yeah, it's either it's either right, but it's either

652
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:04,920
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna or or you can or we can

653
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 1: have sex. But that's it, Like I'll fuck a trans girl,

654
00:33:07,760 --> 00:33:09,480
Speaker 1: but I'm not gonna like me the date I was

655
00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 1: talking about that beautiful ship that I'm just putting your

656
00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:15,080
Speaker 1: in box buck all that, and um, that was the issue.

657
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 1: So now I put it out there. It's the first

658
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:20,360
Speaker 1: thing that you see I am trans now, I like

659
00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:22,920
Speaker 1: movies and books and then like all the other stuff.

660
00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:24,920
Speaker 1: And then like when I meet somebody at like a

661
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:28,480
Speaker 1: bar or something like that, I don't disclose until he

662
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 1: asked me out how tall are you? By the way,

663
00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:33,320
Speaker 1: five times, the height is the only thing that's ever

664
00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:37,680
Speaker 1: um made me think twice, Like when I see women

665
00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 1: that are quote unquote just for the sake of conversation passing,

666
00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:43,480
Speaker 1: and I'm not sure for second it's it's only hyps,

667
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:45,920
Speaker 1: never their frame, it's never how big they are. It's

668
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 1: only hYP that's been like and that's like, oh, that's

669
00:33:48,920 --> 00:33:50,600
Speaker 1: a real texy subject for me. Like whenever I guy

670
00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:52,840
Speaker 1: asked like how tall I am online or something like that,

671
00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:55,560
Speaker 1: it immediately pisses me to funk off because that's and

672
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:56,920
Speaker 1: my thing is, I wish the people just be more

673
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 1: honest about it and just say that because men try

674
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:01,360
Speaker 1: to clock you, like it doesn't matter how cute you are,

675
00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:03,400
Speaker 1: just my how beautiful yards a trans woman if you're

676
00:34:03,400 --> 00:34:06,640
Speaker 1: over five or seven. That like for a lot of

677
00:34:06,640 --> 00:34:10,200
Speaker 1: guys that like they're like, yeah, you might pass. But

678
00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:13,800
Speaker 1: I ain't got time for that because people question tall women,

679
00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:20,359
Speaker 1: even people that you know are sist women, you'd be like, no, no, okay, Um,

680
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 1: you don't want to delve into this a little bit.

681
00:34:22,880 --> 00:34:25,399
Speaker 1: I have a specific one. That's fine. Um, you want

682
00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:28,919
Speaker 1: to go first, all you should. This message is brought

683
00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:31,600
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684
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685
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686
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687
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691
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:54,480
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692
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693
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694
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695
00:35:04,239 --> 00:35:06,680
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696
00:35:06,719 --> 00:35:09,400
Speaker 1: out your dick's gonna be fucking ready to go, and

697
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:12,359
Speaker 1: guess what, you can take them any time, day or night,

698
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699
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,719
Speaker 1: as a phill, so you could literally be ready the

700
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:21,120
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701
00:35:21,160 --> 00:35:24,239
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702
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Speaker 1: Horrible Triumph for free and tell us how good your

703
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:32,880
Speaker 1: sex was. So here's my question. I had a class

704
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:36,839
Speaker 1: in college once where we had a trans woman come

705
00:35:36,920 --> 00:35:41,280
Speaker 1: up and she was really just just starting transitioning. Um.

706
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:42,600
Speaker 1: To be honest, I thought it was a whit dude

707
00:35:42,600 --> 00:35:46,200
Speaker 1: with long hair because she wasn't even really dressing um

708
00:35:46,239 --> 00:35:49,759
Speaker 1: like like a woman. Did you usually would? But I

709
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:52,560
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about genitalia in the first question out

710
00:35:52,560 --> 00:35:54,400
Speaker 1: of my mouth. And it's funny because I don't have

711
00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:56,040
Speaker 1: a sex podcast. I was like, what do you do

712
00:35:56,080 --> 00:35:59,840
Speaker 1: when people want to talk about you know, are you preopera?

713
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:02,480
Speaker 1: So I really want to know, and she got really insulted.

714
00:36:02,719 --> 00:36:05,720
Speaker 1: Did I ask that question? But it's something that I'm

715
00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:10,080
Speaker 1: curious about because now we know your trans Then what

716
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:14,400
Speaker 1: the reason I'm curious is because even if someone's down,

717
00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:17,880
Speaker 1: maybe they've never I don't know, They're like, Okay, do

718
00:36:17,920 --> 00:36:19,919
Speaker 1: we have anal sex? Do I have anal sex? Now?

719
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:22,560
Speaker 1: How do we have sex? That's important too, because I'm

720
00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:26,720
Speaker 1: not sure, So, like, at what point do you feel

721
00:36:26,719 --> 00:36:29,160
Speaker 1: comfortable talking about it and how can someone ask you

722
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 1: in a respectful way that's wild. Um, honestly, I'm but

723
00:36:35,200 --> 00:36:36,680
Speaker 1: I think it's different just because I've been in an

724
00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:38,600
Speaker 1: activism field. So I think i'm a lot more because

725
00:36:38,600 --> 00:36:41,319
Speaker 1: I have to tell like rooms of people about what's

726
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:43,080
Speaker 1: between my legs and what's not between my legs, or

727
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:45,560
Speaker 1: how I talk about sex, and so I think that

728
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:48,280
Speaker 1: for me, it's more so about asking about their comfort,

729
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:51,359
Speaker 1: but it's asking about your comfort for my sanity because

730
00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:54,480
Speaker 1: I have time to build something awesome. We're talking for

731
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,319
Speaker 1: two weeks or so or whatever, and then we have

732
00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:58,640
Speaker 1: a drunk night, come back to the crib and you

733
00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 1: just saying down so you you you're saying your activist,

734
00:37:03,040 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 1: and I think that's the second or third time and

735
00:37:04,719 --> 00:37:07,840
Speaker 1: just you just you being forward right being an activists.

736
00:37:08,480 --> 00:37:10,920
Speaker 1: That's why you put Is that a reason why you

737
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:14,880
Speaker 1: feel comfortable saying I'm trans? Let's move on? Because some people,

738
00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:16,640
Speaker 1: like you said, don't want to be pulled out of

739
00:37:16,640 --> 00:37:18,480
Speaker 1: that space, like I want to be recognized where I

740
00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 1: am right now, I follow a few trans women that

741
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:23,120
Speaker 1: don't have it in their profile right and then they

742
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:25,399
Speaker 1: have hundreds of comments let me eat you but you'll

743
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:30,279
Speaker 1: understand the other. And I'm like, okay, So that's why

744
00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 1: I kind of was like, Yo, we need to make

745
00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:35,120
Speaker 1: trans more normalized. And only where you can do that

746
00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:37,239
Speaker 1: is if you say, oh, I'm trying. That's why I

747
00:37:37,280 --> 00:37:40,279
Speaker 1: said it, because how do you feel about that? But

748
00:37:40,400 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 1: nothing that There are plenty of women that are saying

749
00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:43,680
Speaker 1: that the trans. But the thing about it is that

750
00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:47,360
Speaker 1: when we say it, it's immediately brought down, and especially

751
00:37:47,360 --> 00:37:49,600
Speaker 1: when you're open for hate, there's a lot of hate there,

752
00:37:49,840 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 1: but it's not even necessarily. Hey, when you're an attractive

753
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:54,359
Speaker 1: woman that says that your trans, it's immediately boiled down

754
00:37:54,440 --> 00:37:56,120
Speaker 1: to your sexual parts of what you can do for

755
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:59,399
Speaker 1: me sexually, they no longer want to hear about you know,

756
00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:01,600
Speaker 1: anything that you have going on. If they followed you

757
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:05,439
Speaker 1: for hair. Even women, it boils down to like, oh,

758
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:06,880
Speaker 1: she was pretty, But now I want to know if

759
00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:08,480
Speaker 1: she says it has her penis. Now I want to

760
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:10,480
Speaker 1: know if she's willing to me if she does have

761
00:38:10,560 --> 00:38:13,160
Speaker 1: her penis. Guys, it's like, oh, I wonder, like if

762
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:14,480
Speaker 1: I can slide in the d M is real quick.

763
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:17,000
Speaker 1: I wonder if she's an escort, like it immediately goes

764
00:38:17,080 --> 00:38:19,520
Speaker 1: to all of these others, like the second that you

765
00:38:19,600 --> 00:38:23,120
Speaker 1: say that you are trans, but you're not, you know,

766
00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 1: like the version of trans that people think should be

767
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:27,920
Speaker 1: kept out of bathrooms, that version, and you're an actually

768
00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:30,279
Speaker 1: like an attractive person that people can see themselves having

769
00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:32,399
Speaker 1: sex with, then that's all people can think about. I've

770
00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:35,480
Speaker 1: been curious about that too, because like I had a

771
00:38:36,520 --> 00:38:39,759
Speaker 1: sis had her old friends, not friend for real, but yeah,

772
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 1: I smoke with back in Florida and this woman watched

773
00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:46,319
Speaker 1: by us who was trans. She had a shirt with

774
00:38:46,320 --> 00:38:49,279
Speaker 1: a flag on it, and he's like, is that a

775
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:51,399
Speaker 1: gay flag? That's what he asked me in a blue, white,

776
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:54,399
Speaker 1: pink whatever it is. And I was like, no, she's

777
00:38:54,440 --> 00:38:58,719
Speaker 1: trans and he was a trans flag. Yeah um, and

778
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 1: he said okay, Well like her, I would fuck And

779
00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 1: I know she heard him, and I wondered how she felt.

780
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:08,080
Speaker 1: And I didn't say anything because I was confused on what.

781
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,360
Speaker 1: I didn't check him. I didn't know what to do,

782
00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:13,400
Speaker 1: but I wondered, like, is he by curious? Is there

783
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:17,799
Speaker 1: a such thing as trans curious? Why is that a thing?

784
00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:21,600
Speaker 1: If he if it's a trans woman, but it doesn't

785
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:23,960
Speaker 1: matter because she's a woman that's an attractive woman who

786
00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:29,840
Speaker 1: he would suck. I mean, but okay, so that's the thing.

787
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:32,520
Speaker 1: So no, that's the thing. That's the thing we need

788
00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 1: to be because he doesn't know how to get you know,

789
00:39:34,760 --> 00:39:36,600
Speaker 1: I need to get there because I was gonna say

790
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:39,720
Speaker 1: this before you're at the bar. You're talking to dude.

791
00:39:40,080 --> 00:39:43,319
Speaker 1: You don't know what his preferences are. He doesn't know

792
00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:55,799
Speaker 1: your history anything else. I'm trying to try. He doesn't know, bro,

793
00:39:55,920 --> 00:40:00,279
Speaker 1: I'm trying. Got a big dude over here. It was like,

794
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:04,560
Speaker 1: I don't want no smoke. I know your sexual orientation,

795
00:40:05,080 --> 00:40:10,839
Speaker 1: but let me just I'm trying here. Just everybody appreciate

796
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:13,880
Speaker 1: he doesn't You're waiting to the end of the conversation.

797
00:40:13,960 --> 00:40:17,080
Speaker 1: Let's talk about the time with you, the whole conversation

798
00:40:18,560 --> 00:40:23,040
Speaker 1: at the end of the conversation. Yeah, so she's like,

799
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:26,360
Speaker 1: she'll have the drinks. Can you talk about do you

800
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:28,440
Speaker 1: know trans women that do not do that? And then

801
00:40:28,480 --> 00:40:31,520
Speaker 1: can you talk about reasons for safety and what works best?

802
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:33,680
Speaker 1: I want to talk about safety. Disclosure and safety are

803
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:36,040
Speaker 1: they go hand in hand? Right? So you never know

804
00:40:36,280 --> 00:40:40,560
Speaker 1: when disclosing it's gonna get you jumped. Outside of this by.

805
00:40:40,680 --> 00:40:42,360
Speaker 1: You never know when disclosing is going to get a

806
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:44,560
Speaker 1: bottle upside the head right then and there. You never know,

807
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:46,280
Speaker 1: right You don't know how people are going to respond

808
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:49,919
Speaker 1: to react. And when I was I want to say,

809
00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:51,880
Speaker 1: when I was twenty two, I was living in Texas

810
00:40:51,920 --> 00:40:54,520
Speaker 1: and that very same thing happened to me. I'm at

811
00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:57,120
Speaker 1: a bar, I'm mind in my business, I'm drinking, had

812
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 1: a bad night. African do fines ship comes over, six

813
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:03,080
Speaker 1: ft something, him and his entourage with people and he's winding.

814
00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:06,280
Speaker 1: I had a horrible fucking day. So you buying drinks,

815
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 1: I'm drinking, We're talking, we're chatting, and at the end

816
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:12,080
Speaker 1: of the night, I'm like, okay, I'm bouncing and he

817
00:41:12,160 --> 00:41:13,799
Speaker 1: was like, no, let me get your number. I'm gonna

818
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:15,719
Speaker 1: be back. And I was like, okay, well before you

819
00:41:15,760 --> 00:41:17,680
Speaker 1: do that, like, I gotta tell you, like this probably

820
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:20,440
Speaker 1: isn't what you want. And he's like, what do you

821
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:21,879
Speaker 1: mean this isn't what I want. I was like, well,

822
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:23,840
Speaker 1: I'm I'm trans I'm not sure if you want to

823
00:41:23,840 --> 00:41:26,640
Speaker 1: take it further than this, and he's just like, oh, like,

824
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,480
Speaker 1: you know, not necessarily my thing. I know how American

825
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 1: men are, but that's not me, and I'm thinking, okay,

826
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:35,480
Speaker 1: decent exchange. I'm gonna go hop in this car and

827
00:41:35,520 --> 00:41:38,640
Speaker 1: I'm abounce and on my way to my car, six

828
00:41:38,719 --> 00:41:43,160
Speaker 1: African men beat my ass outside of the bottom. He

829
00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:46,200
Speaker 1: went and gather his goonies and they beat me up

830
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:48,239
Speaker 1: outside of the bar, and they made it up their

831
00:41:48,280 --> 00:41:52,080
Speaker 1: business and then stopped. Uh some guys like from the

832
00:41:52,120 --> 00:41:54,440
Speaker 1: inside of the bar who heard him plotting. Because what

833
00:41:54,480 --> 00:41:57,840
Speaker 1: happened was after I said it, it was my immediate

834
00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 1: like feeling to run, even though he was being nice,

835
00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:04,480
Speaker 1: something in my spirit just was like this ain't this

836
00:42:04,520 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 1: ain't right. That's so you're I want to apologize for that, right,

837
00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:11,800
Speaker 1: And I'm apologized just for everybody who are ive, because

838
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 1: I know in my life I have had those moments

839
00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:18,399
Speaker 1: where I might have run into somebody and be like, yo,

840
00:42:18,760 --> 00:42:21,279
Speaker 1: that's a man or whatever. I'm pretty sure I can't

841
00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:23,520
Speaker 1: remember anything specific right now, but I'm pretty sure I've

842
00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:25,680
Speaker 1: done it. So but that's just my own ignorance that

843
00:42:25,680 --> 00:42:29,520
Speaker 1: I've had to deal with. But moving further from that

844
00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:31,520
Speaker 1: without a butt to the end of that statement, because

845
00:42:31,560 --> 00:42:36,839
Speaker 1: that statement needs to be isolated. Do you think that damn?

846
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:43,080
Speaker 1: Because this is mass specific after six drinks. That's the

847
00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 1: time when you tell me that when I'm not even

848
00:42:45,120 --> 00:42:48,000
Speaker 1: thinking properly. But my thing is, I have no intention

849
00:42:48,040 --> 00:42:51,040
Speaker 1: on having sex with you. Yes you're attractive, Yes you're cool.

850
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:52,879
Speaker 1: Why she gotta tell you where she's drinking and chilling,

851
00:42:52,960 --> 00:42:55,920
Speaker 1: because al our exchange has nothing to It's our exchange

852
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:59,680
Speaker 1: here in this bar, at this moment. See, I'm gonna

853
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:01,520
Speaker 1: be honest, know where this is leading, this conversation between

854
00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:03,839
Speaker 1: this man and a woman. You know what this is leading.

855
00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:08,360
Speaker 1: But at the end of the night, when you're drinking

856
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:12,600
Speaker 1: with someone you need at a bar, I'm trying. I'm

857
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:15,600
Speaker 1: gonna I don't, but you know I want to have sex.

858
00:43:16,440 --> 00:43:18,680
Speaker 1: If you might not know what you want, but you

859
00:43:18,760 --> 00:43:20,440
Speaker 1: know what I want. I owe you that when I'm

860
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:26,399
Speaker 1: enjoying you, don't I'm on my period. That's your mouth

861
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,640
Speaker 1: works because like he said, like she said, maybe dude

862
00:43:29,640 --> 00:43:31,120
Speaker 1: could just go for some head. That's what they'd be

863
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:34,680
Speaker 1: asking for anyway, right, that's what she said. But that

864
00:43:34,680 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 1: don't mean that she gotta fucking tell you that she

865
00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:38,839
Speaker 1: ain't in the mood. I totally agree with you, And

866
00:43:39,080 --> 00:43:43,320
Speaker 1: like I said, I realized that there's and I realized

867
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:44,840
Speaker 1: that some people might not want to say nothing because

868
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:47,200
Speaker 1: of how motherfucker's gonna make them feel. How are they

869
00:43:47,239 --> 00:43:51,239
Speaker 1: going to make them respond? I just to night and

870
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:55,120
Speaker 1: enjoying someone's time before and then he's gonna come, and

871
00:43:55,120 --> 00:43:56,759
Speaker 1: then she's going to get into that place where she's

872
00:43:56,760 --> 00:43:59,960
Speaker 1: either got to be honest or go back saying I'm

873
00:44:00,040 --> 00:44:02,000
Speaker 1: not going to say nothing. But why is the end

874
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:04,359
Speaker 1: of the night at bad time? But that's that's good,

875
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:08,600
Speaker 1: goes there on the first thing before. But do you

876
00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:12,279
Speaker 1: see how like this whole thing is like problematic and

877
00:44:12,320 --> 00:44:14,799
Speaker 1: ship It's like I'm damned if I do. Yes, I

878
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,480
Speaker 1: get it, I totally get it, But I don't. You

879
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:21,000
Speaker 1: gotta understand it as a me too? What do I do?

880
00:44:21,560 --> 00:44:24,120
Speaker 1: Because now I'm sitting here, I didn't know that this

881
00:44:24,160 --> 00:44:27,960
Speaker 1: was the conversation I was. But why is that a problem?

882
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:31,360
Speaker 1: Because all anybody else in this bar saw, all anybody

883
00:44:31,360 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 1: else in the bar saw, was you talking to a

884
00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:40,759
Speaker 1: pretty girl at the bar? Yeah, nobody else, nobody else

885
00:44:40,760 --> 00:44:46,240
Speaker 1: in the bar. But you knows that I'm trans because

886
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:50,040
Speaker 1: your homeboys having lit night, but your home my thing

887
00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:52,200
Speaker 1: is if you're because Okay, so what you're trying to

888
00:44:52,200 --> 00:44:56,400
Speaker 1: say is I'm transphobic, right, And what I'm saying is

889
00:44:56,400 --> 00:44:59,399
Speaker 1: if you're representing this person and you're transphobic, transphobia and

890
00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:01,799
Speaker 1: to for for it to be triggered. It's about the

891
00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:05,239
Speaker 1: embarrassment of being caught with a trans person. Nobody caught

892
00:45:05,239 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 1: you with a trans person you don't know as nobody

893
00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:10,800
Speaker 1: you know, yo, boom, this is a trans trans woman

894
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:14,640
Speaker 1: that lives in my neighborhood. Have body done ridiculously? This

895
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:17,799
Speaker 1: is back before bodies was getting done. Biggest round is

896
00:45:17,880 --> 00:45:22,080
Speaker 1: as best boobs. Everything we all knew, Like you said,

897
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:24,640
Speaker 1: we know her. She speaks to us what up you know?

898
00:45:24,840 --> 00:45:26,319
Speaker 1: And she speaks like a lady, and we we know.

899
00:45:26,400 --> 00:45:28,520
Speaker 1: We really were just having fun with her all that.

900
00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:31,480
Speaker 1: It was good. It's going because, like you said, she

901
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:34,000
Speaker 1: grew up around us. We know her, we know what

902
00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:36,680
Speaker 1: when she transitioned and everything. That was a fair point

903
00:45:36,719 --> 00:45:39,719
Speaker 1: to make to her. So boom, we all outside one

904
00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:42,839
Speaker 1: night she's walking to the train station. Bus driver polls over,

905
00:45:44,120 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 1: hops out. Bus driver pulls the whole bus over. Somebody's

906
00:45:47,640 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 1: crazy like that. We pull over bus over. Uh tries

907
00:45:52,960 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 1: to highlight her and I guess she just told him

908
00:45:55,960 --> 00:46:00,680
Speaker 1: straight up like yo, I'm trying. He and she backed up,

909
00:46:00,680 --> 00:46:03,440
Speaker 1: so we're like yo, yo yo. So he's seeing us

910
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:05,600
Speaker 1: like we was like yo. And he ran back on

911
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 1: the bus and took off on the bus. So I

912
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:13,520
Speaker 1: get that y'all have it bad either way, but I

913
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:19,520
Speaker 1: don't know as the bus driver, when was the right

914
00:46:19,520 --> 00:46:23,520
Speaker 1: time for him to to know or But obviously nothing

915
00:46:24,320 --> 00:46:27,440
Speaker 1: if you freak out before my number in your phone,

916
00:46:27,520 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 1: there's no good time. There was no good that's six

917
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:33,239
Speaker 1: drains don't matter, dog, because if you was gonna tell

918
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:35,880
Speaker 1: your niggas and y'all are drunk to me to be

919
00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:38,239
Speaker 1: that violent, like, I'm gonna be real with you. This

920
00:46:38,320 --> 00:46:41,359
Speaker 1: is the same thing with abuse, right, I've maybe you've

921
00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:42,759
Speaker 1: never held me told the story, but I had a

922
00:46:42,880 --> 00:46:45,560
Speaker 1: very abusive X and the first time you hit me,

923
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:48,880
Speaker 1: I was like, he was drunk. That's what I thought.

924
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:53,640
Speaker 1: How could drunk? You are a good person, right, I

925
00:46:53,640 --> 00:46:55,799
Speaker 1: don't think you could get drunk and hurt me. I

926
00:46:55,840 --> 00:46:59,560
Speaker 1: don't know that he's a period. That is, That's what

927
00:46:59,600 --> 00:47:03,440
Speaker 1: we're saying the same point, right, trans Phobia comes from

928
00:47:03,480 --> 00:47:06,160
Speaker 1: from a place where it can't be corrected or learned

929
00:47:06,239 --> 00:47:09,520
Speaker 1: from that, you can. The point is something correct couldn't

930
00:47:09,520 --> 00:47:13,120
Speaker 1: have been saved from them sick regardless his niggas jumped

931
00:47:13,160 --> 00:47:16,880
Speaker 1: you that didn't take beer, didn't take tequila. Period, You

932
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:19,040
Speaker 1: wouldn't do it to her. You wouldn't, you wouldn't do

933
00:47:19,080 --> 00:47:22,080
Speaker 1: it to me. You have to innately have that, And

934
00:47:22,480 --> 00:47:25,560
Speaker 1: this is why conversations are necessary so that we can learn, like,

935
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,719
Speaker 1: trans people aren't scary, trans women aren't scary, and honestly,

936
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:32,920
Speaker 1: trans phobia. So I don't know, that's one of my questions.

937
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:36,640
Speaker 1: But but that's the thing it's about. It's not even

938
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:40,239
Speaker 1: about normalizing. It's about going about your sucking business, mind

939
00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:43,799
Speaker 1: your fucking business like it's it's not even just the

940
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:46,920
Speaker 1: idea of oh, it being scary for it to happen

941
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:49,800
Speaker 1: to you. But I don't understand that people like, there's

942
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:52,360
Speaker 1: a young man who just killed himself because he was

943
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:55,440
Speaker 1: in a relationship with the trans that that had nothing

944
00:47:55,480 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 1: to do Reese killed himself in a relationship that had

945
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:03,560
Speaker 1: nothing to do with other thiggas, But they're pressed because

946
00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:06,359
Speaker 1: he likes you don't. I'll be real with you. I said,

947
00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:09,040
Speaker 1: we had Dustin in here and we discussed that and

948
00:48:09,080 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 1: I feel like they were so hard on him because

949
00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:15,879
Speaker 1: he looked so mad. Yeah, you nigga like you. Like,

950
00:48:16,280 --> 00:48:18,879
Speaker 1: let's say maybe you versus a guy that's a little

951
00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:22,160
Speaker 1: more feminine or flamboyant dating a trans women. They don't

952
00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:24,880
Speaker 1: get on you more. They don't expect it from you,

953
00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:27,000
Speaker 1: and that's what happens. I'm thinking about what you guys

954
00:48:27,160 --> 00:48:30,239
Speaker 1: said to me, and I'm thinking about why it's such

955
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:34,880
Speaker 1: a big deal for people who are transphobic, and I

956
00:48:34,920 --> 00:48:39,560
Speaker 1: think that in the heterosexual community amongst women, women, men,

957
00:48:40,560 --> 00:48:44,480
Speaker 1: and I've been I've been told that even gay community,

958
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:49,200
Speaker 1: there is a lot of homophobia. I don't know exactly

959
00:48:49,239 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 1: how to represent what they're talking about in the gay community,

960
00:48:51,680 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 1: but I do know men aren't allowed any preferences outside

961
00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:06,840
Speaker 1: of women before being labeled gay. We're very scared of

962
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:13,360
Speaker 1: what we might like, of any exploring, of being judged,

963
00:49:14,080 --> 00:49:17,719
Speaker 1: and so because of that, we go super hard to

964
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:24,880
Speaker 1: prove that we aren't even masking your own desires and curiosities.

965
00:49:25,560 --> 00:49:29,960
Speaker 1: So because of that, I think that's where the phobia

966
00:49:30,040 --> 00:49:34,600
Speaker 1: comes from and the aggression. Because the guy at the bar,

967
00:49:34,920 --> 00:49:39,120
Speaker 1: this guy, his biggest problem wasn't you, Because he liked

968
00:49:39,160 --> 00:49:43,799
Speaker 1: you already. His biggest problem was those guys knowing that

969
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:49,560
Speaker 1: he liked you. That's his biggest problem. It was them

970
00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:54,759
Speaker 1: because she walked away when when when she when she

971
00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:58,279
Speaker 1: walked away, he looked around and wanted to know did

972
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:03,080
Speaker 1: they know she was trans because now he wanted to ask, yo,

973
00:50:03,400 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 1: she's this, Yo, did you know? But it goes back

974
00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:09,400
Speaker 1: to what he said, that's an internal thing, right, because

975
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:12,560
Speaker 1: it's like you having to validate that you're How could

976
00:50:12,560 --> 00:50:16,879
Speaker 1: I like that? How could I know? I've been at

977
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:19,680
Speaker 1: the early stages of my transition. I remember I'm walking

978
00:50:19,719 --> 00:50:21,560
Speaker 1: home and it was three dudes. One of them wanted

979
00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:23,240
Speaker 1: to talk to me, and the other two trails behind.

980
00:50:23,719 --> 00:50:26,120
Speaker 1: I'm listening to the conversation that his friends are having

981
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:29,360
Speaker 1: behind us. I think that's the man. I think. I

982
00:50:29,360 --> 00:50:30,960
Speaker 1: think that's the man. Yo, you think's I think that's

983
00:50:30,960 --> 00:50:33,160
Speaker 1: a man. He's so busy trying to spit game, he

984
00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:35,839
Speaker 1: don't hear nothing that's happening. It's not until we get

985
00:50:35,880 --> 00:50:39,120
Speaker 1: into the CBS and we part ways that I'm still

986
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:41,360
Speaker 1: hearing the conversation. Yo, I think that's a dude. Not

987
00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:43,399
Speaker 1: I ain't no dude. Like she finds y'all don't see

988
00:50:43,480 --> 00:50:45,080
Speaker 1: not that's the dude, not to go. We got the

989
00:50:45,120 --> 00:50:46,960
Speaker 1: light on, now go look at it. And then now

990
00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:50,600
Speaker 1: that would scare me, Like I'm literally like, I don't

991
00:50:50,600 --> 00:50:54,400
Speaker 1: know what it's scared me. But my thing is he

992
00:50:54,440 --> 00:50:57,000
Speaker 1: didn't think even in the light he came over, he

993
00:50:57,080 --> 00:50:59,160
Speaker 1: did like the so you really gonna give me your number?

994
00:50:59,160 --> 00:51:01,600
Speaker 1: But he's observing me now now that there's light, right

995
00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:03,360
Speaker 1: now that we're no longer walking down the dark street.

996
00:51:03,400 --> 00:51:05,480
Speaker 1: Now that there's like you're observing me. You still don't

997
00:51:05,520 --> 00:51:07,959
Speaker 1: see it. But because that you've pressed you about it,

998
00:51:08,520 --> 00:51:11,399
Speaker 1: now you have to see it. Oh yeah, y'all, all right,

999
00:51:11,840 --> 00:51:14,319
Speaker 1: that's the dude. I'm getting the funk up out of here, y'all,

1000
00:51:14,400 --> 00:51:18,040
Speaker 1: let's go. But you didn't see that. And so it's

1001
00:51:18,080 --> 00:51:20,440
Speaker 1: back to what Weezy is talking about. It doesn't matter

1002
00:51:21,000 --> 00:51:24,359
Speaker 1: about what they think. It's all about the perception of

1003
00:51:24,400 --> 00:51:26,400
Speaker 1: myself and how I see myself and how I know

1004
00:51:26,440 --> 00:51:28,919
Speaker 1: that they're going to think about me regardless. Because even

1005
00:51:28,960 --> 00:51:30,879
Speaker 1: if even if he had come back and said, nah,

1006
00:51:30,920 --> 00:51:34,480
Speaker 1: in the light sheet even more gorgeous now according to them,

1007
00:51:34,520 --> 00:51:35,880
Speaker 1: you gay. And that's what he doesn't want to have

1008
00:51:35,880 --> 00:51:39,440
Speaker 1: to deal with. It's still internal. It's all about him

1009
00:51:39,480 --> 00:51:42,000
Speaker 1: and his bullshit. But and that's the thing. I think

1010
00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:43,759
Speaker 1: a lot of men like to make it about other

1011
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:46,640
Speaker 1: people when it's it's legitimately about you. One of the

1012
00:51:46,800 --> 00:51:49,600
Speaker 1: scariest things for me when I was talking to a

1013
00:51:49,640 --> 00:51:53,000
Speaker 1: trans woman at the bar like a month back, no

1014
00:51:53,080 --> 00:51:57,920
Speaker 1: bullshit doing this show, being a part of the community

1015
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,840
Speaker 1: like friends that I have, I was literally her feeling her,

1016
00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:03,560
Speaker 1: and I was thinking, like, who's asked them have to

1017
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:06,239
Speaker 1: be over my girl? Like I started back forwarding in

1018
00:52:06,320 --> 00:52:08,400
Speaker 1: my head like all the things that would happen to

1019
00:52:08,480 --> 00:52:10,840
Speaker 1: me and how I would deal with everybody else. And

1020
00:52:10,840 --> 00:52:14,080
Speaker 1: I was really like, I can't. I think that there's

1021
00:52:14,120 --> 00:52:18,040
Speaker 1: so much understanding of what's going on in society now

1022
00:52:18,320 --> 00:52:22,600
Speaker 1: for trans well maybe not for trans or maybe I

1023
00:52:22,640 --> 00:52:26,879
Speaker 1: don't know, but I don't think that it's I don't

1024
00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:30,040
Speaker 1: want to make the heterosexual people the victim, but I

1025
00:52:30,040 --> 00:52:32,680
Speaker 1: do want to say that there's so much pressure on

1026
00:52:33,840 --> 00:52:37,000
Speaker 1: black men, straight black men to be a certain way,

1027
00:52:37,239 --> 00:52:40,160
Speaker 1: and now we looked at as like we're like being

1028
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 1: demon noted for being that way. I don't think that

1029
00:52:42,520 --> 00:52:45,759
Speaker 1: we've been talking that by our our music. I'll coach you,

1030
00:52:45,800 --> 00:52:49,200
Speaker 1: our parents, the church, everybody. You gotta be this way.

1031
00:52:49,360 --> 00:52:53,560
Speaker 1: And the minute you deviate from that, you're a white

1032
00:52:53,560 --> 00:52:56,320
Speaker 1: person saying I didn't know that, saying there was bad.

1033
00:52:57,200 --> 00:53:01,120
Speaker 1: That's what you don't know. But I actually I want

1034
00:53:01,160 --> 00:53:02,680
Speaker 1: to come to his defense on that because I think

1035
00:53:02,680 --> 00:53:06,520
Speaker 1: that it's important that we talk about black women's part

1036
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:09,520
Speaker 1: or portion in the way that black men see and

1037
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:14,399
Speaker 1: that you're wrong. You know that this is another human,

1038
00:53:14,440 --> 00:53:16,959
Speaker 1: You know this is a black person doesn't know that

1039
00:53:17,080 --> 00:53:20,160
Speaker 1: at the floor. But when my mother you're telling me

1040
00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:23,040
Speaker 1: you don't, it's not it's not about what they know.

1041
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:26,840
Speaker 1: It's about the idea that the matriarchs of my community,

1042
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:28,960
Speaker 1: the women who i'm my thing is I can be

1043
00:53:29,040 --> 00:53:31,200
Speaker 1: attracted to trans women, right, just like men could be

1044
00:53:31,239 --> 00:53:34,440
Speaker 1: attracted to fat women. Men could be attracted to short women,

1045
00:53:34,680 --> 00:53:36,480
Speaker 1: but majority of the time they don't get to date

1046
00:53:36,520 --> 00:53:38,120
Speaker 1: a lot of those. Majority of the time. He's not

1047
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:41,000
Speaker 1: dating trans women, right. And so if I know that

1048
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 1: dating one trans woman could possibly eradicate my chances of

1049
00:53:45,200 --> 00:53:47,759
Speaker 1: dating any other woman because they know that, then I

1050
00:53:47,800 --> 00:53:51,160
Speaker 1: can't date one trans woman. That's fair that I agree

1051
00:53:51,200 --> 00:53:53,640
Speaker 1: with you on. Now, when he was talking talking about

1052
00:53:53,680 --> 00:53:57,120
Speaker 1: the music and ship like that, saying blatantly transphoping homophobic.

1053
00:53:57,160 --> 00:53:59,520
Speaker 1: Shiit No, I feel like people know that's wrong, but

1054
00:53:59,560 --> 00:54:03,879
Speaker 1: those of fears absolutely because of that influence. That's very

1055
00:54:04,080 --> 00:54:07,680
Speaker 1: That's that's what you're saying about. Saying blatantly homophobic stuff

1056
00:54:07,680 --> 00:54:11,680
Speaker 1: is relatively new when people you still have people saying pause,

1057
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:14,680
Speaker 1: you still got people saying for like ten years ago,

1058
00:54:14,719 --> 00:54:18,400
Speaker 1: I listened to the stuff like that, but it's literally

1059
00:54:18,440 --> 00:54:23,920
Speaker 1: been everything. I went to problem with a gay nigga, Like,

1060
00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:26,640
Speaker 1: I just kind of lived a different life. I always

1061
00:54:26,719 --> 00:54:30,120
Speaker 1: knew those things were bad. I always knew even if

1062
00:54:30,160 --> 00:54:32,920
Speaker 1: I said faggot in high school, it coming out of

1063
00:54:32,960 --> 00:54:34,800
Speaker 1: my mouth didn't even feel right. I had to stop

1064
00:54:34,840 --> 00:54:36,680
Speaker 1: doing that. I had too many gay niggas around me.

1065
00:54:36,680 --> 00:54:38,840
Speaker 1: How could I do that? But you did? We didn't.

1066
00:54:39,040 --> 00:54:41,279
Speaker 1: I knew it wasn't right. Like I'm telling you, I

1067
00:54:41,320 --> 00:54:43,799
Speaker 1: feel like, and you come from a place like there

1068
00:54:43,800 --> 00:54:46,160
Speaker 1: are people that, yes, they knew it was wrong. I'm

1069
00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:48,840
Speaker 1: one of those people. Nigger. I grew up with black

1070
00:54:48,840 --> 00:54:51,520
Speaker 1: ship with a black mama. I just grew up on

1071
00:54:51,520 --> 00:54:53,640
Speaker 1: the different side. You're telling me my gay friends didn't

1072
00:54:53,680 --> 00:54:56,359
Speaker 1: know that was wrong. You understand that I understand your

1073
00:54:56,360 --> 00:54:59,440
Speaker 1: side and I'm doing my best to understand the trans side,

1074
00:54:59,719 --> 00:55:02,560
Speaker 1: but also think that just became bad. That's not true.

1075
00:55:02,680 --> 00:55:04,719
Speaker 1: I just also think that it's been part of our

1076
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:08,439
Speaker 1: culture to be phobia, to have these phobias, and now

1077
00:55:08,480 --> 00:55:11,920
Speaker 1: we're like, it's wrong. Everybody's wrong. And also, so my

1078
00:55:12,000 --> 00:55:14,200
Speaker 1: thing is where does the growth come from? How does

1079
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:17,320
Speaker 1: it happens? It has been part of the culture to

1080
00:55:17,400 --> 00:55:21,040
Speaker 1: push men to be like that, but we've always known

1081
00:55:21,080 --> 00:55:22,880
Speaker 1: that it was to treat people to look at We'll

1082
00:55:22,920 --> 00:55:25,040
Speaker 1: look at how many black people at a faster rate

1083
00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:27,279
Speaker 1: are getting employed to things because we're more of the

1084
00:55:27,280 --> 00:55:30,200
Speaker 1: face of things. Black Lives Matter movement, there's just more movements.

1085
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:33,399
Speaker 1: We're more in your face. Maybe that's why you feel

1086
00:55:33,440 --> 00:55:35,839
Speaker 1: that way. Even to say sis feels like a slur

1087
00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:39,600
Speaker 1: like nigga. No, that's how people use it. It's not you.

1088
00:55:39,840 --> 00:55:42,040
Speaker 1: They don't talk to y'all that way. I'm the one

1089
00:55:42,120 --> 00:55:46,960
Speaker 1: on Twitter. If you google, on search, tile TV and sisht,

1090
00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:50,240
Speaker 1: you will see everybody who has says it. It's saying

1091
00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:52,799
Speaker 1: it to me in a derogatory way, to the point

1092
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:55,160
Speaker 1: where I didn't like the word until I found out

1093
00:55:55,160 --> 00:55:57,400
Speaker 1: what it was. And that's the thing, Like, it's about

1094
00:55:57,800 --> 00:55:59,920
Speaker 1: knowledge of the word right as people are using it.

1095
00:56:00,160 --> 00:56:02,439
Speaker 1: Because I've heard this argument before with people like don't

1096
00:56:02,440 --> 00:56:05,160
Speaker 1: call me sis because that just makes like, just call

1097
00:56:05,239 --> 00:56:07,320
Speaker 1: me what I am. I'm a woman, you're not a woman.

1098
00:56:07,360 --> 00:56:10,839
Speaker 1: But it's like, so hetero sexual people since type people

1099
00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:13,920
Speaker 1: are allowed to give every other community a name that

1100
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:17,560
Speaker 1: they can cope with and and compartmentalize people, but then

1101
00:56:17,600 --> 00:56:20,400
Speaker 1: when the LGBT people give you all a name and

1102
00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:26,399
Speaker 1: compartment list for our conversations, it's a slur. I didn't,

1103
00:56:26,640 --> 00:56:28,879
Speaker 1: I didn't. I didn't. I'm saying that when it's using

1104
00:56:28,920 --> 00:56:31,160
Speaker 1: a certain way, that's the way that But my thing,

1105
00:56:32,120 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 1: like there's no way to be like, oh, like I

1106
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:38,879
Speaker 1: feel stupid even trying to find a way to say

1107
00:56:38,960 --> 00:56:41,160
Speaker 1: sis in a way that's like disrespectful. It's just like,

1108
00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:44,440
Speaker 1: oh no, any time one of these sist said straight

1109
00:56:44,560 --> 00:56:49,239
Speaker 1: black men come on here, it's every time I see

1110
00:56:49,239 --> 00:56:52,680
Speaker 1: that word. It's like that I think that anytime any

1111
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:54,640
Speaker 1: one of these trans women get on like that's like

1112
00:56:54,680 --> 00:56:56,920
Speaker 1: me being upset for like that. It's just the title.

1113
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:01,360
Speaker 1: I think that you, like the energy are given us

1114
00:57:01,400 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 1: sometimes how women feel about the word female. These females

1115
00:57:05,440 --> 00:57:09,839
Speaker 1: never right. But you see how easy it is for

1116
00:57:09,880 --> 00:57:13,120
Speaker 1: me to say, yeah, I understand that, and y'all like, no, no,

1117
00:57:13,239 --> 00:57:15,600
Speaker 1: we don't understand where you're coming from. And that's the

1118
00:57:15,640 --> 00:57:17,480
Speaker 1: point is that we have to try to understand the

1119
00:57:17,520 --> 00:57:21,480
Speaker 1: other side. We have to. It's curious to see the comments.

1120
00:57:21,480 --> 00:57:24,800
Speaker 1: If I feel like, why are you gonna do it?

1121
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:28,880
Speaker 1: Search it? It's literally right there. I think the reason

1122
00:57:28,920 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 1: it's hard is because, like they're so there are real

1123
00:57:31,760 --> 00:57:36,800
Speaker 1: slurs being a well here it is. You're not a

1124
00:57:36,840 --> 00:57:43,240
Speaker 1: marginalized group. Oh I'm not. We're not. When did that happen?

1125
00:57:43,280 --> 00:57:46,840
Speaker 1: But where where is the oppression? Insists man, Like there's

1126
00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:52,960
Speaker 1: no fucking slurs like black men are aren't marginalized? Definitely

1127
00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:57,600
Speaker 1: say that sis het ain't a motherfucking marginalized group. They're

1128
00:57:57,600 --> 00:58:00,280
Speaker 1: the group with all the privilege. And it's just like

1129
00:58:00,320 --> 00:58:04,560
Speaker 1: the white people privilege out of this world. Ahead, bro,

1130
00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:06,640
Speaker 1: I'm not talking about black man. Take your black ass

1131
00:58:06,640 --> 00:58:10,760
Speaker 1: out of this. Go back to sis head. I'm on

1132
00:58:10,960 --> 00:58:14,600
Speaker 1: black man side always sis Head. She's like, what trumps

1133
00:58:14,640 --> 00:58:21,200
Speaker 1: this this head? Okay? Like I want to questions I've

1134
00:58:21,240 --> 00:58:25,600
Speaker 1: had that. Um, I feel like you're important. I'm gonna

1135
00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:27,320
Speaker 1: go back to Pose. There's a scene in the show

1136
00:58:27,360 --> 00:58:30,040
Speaker 1: pos Okay, there's a popular woman in the show, Electra.

1137
00:58:30,560 --> 00:58:33,920
Speaker 1: She's like the Dune daughter. She's the best. Now Electra

1138
00:58:34,640 --> 00:58:39,200
Speaker 1: wants to get her operation done. What's the name of it, sorry, srs.

1139
00:58:39,640 --> 00:58:43,320
Speaker 1: What is the sexual reassignment surgery? Reassignment surgery? Okay? Special?

1140
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:47,360
Speaker 1: So she wants to be post off. She's pre opt

1141
00:58:47,440 --> 00:58:51,240
Speaker 1: so to speak, and on the show she's very poised, fabulous.

1142
00:58:51,320 --> 00:58:52,919
Speaker 1: She has a sugar daddy to pay for all his ship.

1143
00:58:53,400 --> 00:58:56,000
Speaker 1: When she gets her surgery done, he doesn't want her anymore.

1144
00:58:56,520 --> 00:58:58,680
Speaker 1: I want to talk about that. I want to talk

1145
00:58:58,720 --> 00:59:02,840
Speaker 1: about has anyone ever told you they don't want you too?

1146
00:59:02,840 --> 00:59:04,320
Speaker 1: And how does that feel? Are there any man that

1147
00:59:04,360 --> 00:59:08,240
Speaker 1: are specific when talking to about making sure that it's

1148
00:59:08,280 --> 00:59:12,880
Speaker 1: still there? Whatever? And roundabout ways, um and roundabout ways,

1149
00:59:12,920 --> 00:59:14,920
Speaker 1: Like when the conversation has come up with like two

1150
00:59:15,000 --> 00:59:18,840
Speaker 1: of my long standing like pieces, they both and it's

1151
00:59:18,840 --> 00:59:21,400
Speaker 1: crazy because they are two completely different men, but they

1152
00:59:21,440 --> 00:59:23,880
Speaker 1: both had a very similar answer, which is like it

1153
00:59:24,040 --> 00:59:27,560
Speaker 1: was like that do what you want, but not really

1154
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:31,320
Speaker 1: type deal. Um. And I remember like because I was

1155
00:59:31,360 --> 00:59:33,560
Speaker 1: younger when they when I had that conversation with the

1156
00:59:33,560 --> 00:59:35,880
Speaker 1: both of them, and it was kind of like in

1157
00:59:35,960 --> 00:59:38,680
Speaker 1: my mind, I was like, so are you like are

1158
00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:41,440
Speaker 1: you gay? Like are you not gonna want me if

1159
00:59:41,480 --> 00:59:44,080
Speaker 1: I don't have this, like because I'm a woman, And

1160
00:59:44,160 --> 00:59:46,240
Speaker 1: I thought that that was the whole point, like I

1161
00:59:46,280 --> 00:59:48,080
Speaker 1: thought you would be happy, Like I didn't get the

1162
00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:49,840
Speaker 1: responses from them that I thought that I would get

1163
00:59:49,880 --> 00:59:52,240
Speaker 1: about like getting a vagina, Like I thought that they

1164
00:59:52,240 --> 00:59:54,400
Speaker 1: would be like, oh yeah, like like that, because now

1165
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:56,000
Speaker 1: there's like a wait, lett, I don't know how I

1166
00:59:56,040 --> 00:59:57,360
Speaker 1: do have a question. I want to ask what I

1167
00:59:57,360 --> 01:00:02,240
Speaker 1: feel like defense like taho for those men, are you topping?

1168
01:00:02,800 --> 01:00:06,960
Speaker 1: No you're not. So that's what's really interesting to me

1169
01:00:07,000 --> 01:00:10,360
Speaker 1: because at that point it's really all fucking aesthetics, like

1170
01:00:11,080 --> 01:00:14,800
Speaker 1: and it's just when we say topping, are you the

1171
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:17,240
Speaker 1: one that's penetrating? Okay, so you forget it. I don't

1172
01:00:17,280 --> 01:00:21,560
Speaker 1: want to know, sorry, Like what I wanted to know

1173
01:00:21,640 --> 01:00:25,919
Speaker 1: because a lot of the assumption with trans women and

1174
01:00:26,280 --> 01:00:29,480
Speaker 1: sex is like, oh, now I guess to get fucked.

1175
01:00:29,480 --> 01:00:32,360
Speaker 1: But it's like the trans women I know are not

1176
01:00:32,440 --> 01:00:38,360
Speaker 1: fucking niggas. No, the most have sex with most I

1177
01:00:38,360 --> 01:00:42,200
Speaker 1: mean fucking niggas. I'm sorry, like penetrating, they're they're they're

1178
01:00:42,200 --> 01:00:45,400
Speaker 1: not taking, they're not getting. Is that better? So yeah,

1179
01:00:45,440 --> 01:00:49,600
Speaker 1: but that's because they are women. Come on, look at you.

1180
01:00:50,040 --> 01:00:54,439
Speaker 1: God damn it. Fucking learning and ship. But I asked

1181
01:00:54,480 --> 01:00:56,960
Speaker 1: that specific question because I was curious to know if

1182
01:00:56,960 --> 01:00:59,360
Speaker 1: men that have a very serious stance about that are

1183
01:00:59,440 --> 01:01:01,440
Speaker 1: feeling like they're is a piece of puzzle missing for

1184
01:01:01,480 --> 01:01:04,680
Speaker 1: their sex at all. One of the guys like straight

1185
01:01:04,760 --> 01:01:06,760
Speaker 1: up told me, he's like, you know, if I wanted

1186
01:01:06,840 --> 01:01:09,960
Speaker 1: to date or be with a biological woman, I could

1187
01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:12,880
Speaker 1: do that. He's like, the whole thing about being attracted

1188
01:01:12,920 --> 01:01:16,760
Speaker 1: to trans women also is that there's this extra something um,

1189
01:01:16,840 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 1: And I was just like, okay, it's just it's an

1190
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:22,120
Speaker 1: aesthetic thing. It's just like you know, being with you

1191
01:01:22,120 --> 01:01:24,120
Speaker 1: could be with any woman, but like I like fat

1192
01:01:24,120 --> 01:01:28,520
Speaker 1: girls because I like the way that fields or do

1193
01:01:28,560 --> 01:01:30,560
Speaker 1: you ever want to however, you sign a trargery and

1194
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:32,080
Speaker 1: it's one of those things that I teeter back and

1195
01:01:32,080 --> 01:01:34,360
Speaker 1: forth with because it's it's I think that it's mostly

1196
01:01:34,480 --> 01:01:38,920
Speaker 1: for vanity's purposes, right, It's so that I can wear

1197
01:01:39,160 --> 01:01:41,280
Speaker 1: a fucking bathing suit and not have to worry about

1198
01:01:41,280 --> 01:01:45,400
Speaker 1: if my tuck is gonna slip? What what is okay?

1199
01:01:45,560 --> 01:01:48,960
Speaker 1: So if it's not about did we assignment surgery? What

1200
01:01:49,120 --> 01:01:52,560
Speaker 1: exactly was trans to you? Like? What is what we're

1201
01:01:53,760 --> 01:01:55,840
Speaker 1: what's happening? What does trans mean that? Do you mean no?

1202
01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:59,800
Speaker 1: I'm trying to like I'm trying to understand, like so

1203
01:02:00,080 --> 01:02:05,440
Speaker 1: is course dressing the great and there's so what is

1204
01:02:05,480 --> 01:02:09,760
Speaker 1: it trans? So? A lot of the times, cross stresses

1205
01:02:09,840 --> 01:02:12,400
Speaker 1: are just people who usually identify themselves as people who

1206
01:02:12,440 --> 01:02:15,440
Speaker 1: like the way that they feel in the opposite opposite

1207
01:02:15,440 --> 01:02:18,800
Speaker 1: sexist closed and usually that applies to women too, But

1208
01:02:18,840 --> 01:02:21,640
Speaker 1: people don't pay women any attension because whatever. But there

1209
01:02:21,640 --> 01:02:23,240
Speaker 1: are men who will say, like, oh, I just like

1210
01:02:23,280 --> 01:02:25,000
Speaker 1: the way that silk fills on my skin, and like

1211
01:02:25,040 --> 01:02:26,800
Speaker 1: you know the women, the way that women's shirts are

1212
01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:30,920
Speaker 1: cut or whatever. They're usually people that have fallacies for clothing.

1213
01:02:31,080 --> 01:02:33,680
Speaker 1: I wouldn't make feel looking that in their profiles, and

1214
01:02:33,720 --> 01:02:35,360
Speaker 1: then they'll just like wear panties and like more like

1215
01:02:35,560 --> 01:02:38,560
Speaker 1: great type of thing. They're not walking outside, and if

1216
01:02:38,560 --> 01:02:40,280
Speaker 1: they are, it's like for a fetish type of it's

1217
01:02:40,280 --> 01:02:44,200
Speaker 1: a it's a fetish sized activity. It's not. It's a verb.

1218
01:02:44,240 --> 01:02:45,880
Speaker 1: Being is the thing that you do versus any thing

1219
01:02:45,920 --> 01:02:47,720
Speaker 1: that you're living. Right, So it's not this thing that

1220
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:51,600
Speaker 1: constantly um. It's a verb in a thing that you

1221
01:02:51,680 --> 01:02:55,320
Speaker 1: do right now. Trans specifically does that mean to his

1222
01:02:55,400 --> 01:02:58,280
Speaker 1: question for someone that may not know taking shots, taking

1223
01:02:58,280 --> 01:03:04,000
Speaker 1: horm moment, like the actual transitioning, like the feminization of

1224
01:03:04,040 --> 01:03:06,720
Speaker 1: the body, the feminization of the look. And that doesn't

1225
01:03:06,720 --> 01:03:09,600
Speaker 1: mean my thing is. There's a different um bridge to

1226
01:03:09,640 --> 01:03:12,560
Speaker 1: cross for every different person. Right, So me I am

1227
01:03:12,600 --> 01:03:16,000
Speaker 1: a trans them presenting woman, right. But India Moore, who

1228
01:03:16,080 --> 01:03:18,400
Speaker 1: is also on the show Posed, does not identify as

1229
01:03:18,440 --> 01:03:22,400
Speaker 1: a trans woman. OFFSET in India is non binary OFFSET

1230
01:03:22,680 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 1: and so their pronouns are they them offset And a

1231
01:03:25,280 --> 01:03:26,840
Speaker 1: lot of people will look at Indian and say, oh,

1232
01:03:26,840 --> 01:03:28,720
Speaker 1: that's a trans woman. I get it now, but you

1233
01:03:28,760 --> 01:03:32,320
Speaker 1: don't get it because India it's them presenting. However, they

1234
01:03:32,320 --> 01:03:35,880
Speaker 1: are not. By the way, a trans woman that ran

1235
01:03:35,880 --> 01:03:38,760
Speaker 1: into India at a party and she was like bro.

1236
01:03:38,920 --> 01:03:40,800
Speaker 1: People kept coming up there and stand they loved her.

1237
01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:42,760
Speaker 1: On this show, he said, when I found out it

1238
01:03:42,800 --> 01:03:45,280
Speaker 1: was Posed, I was like, ain't a way. He was like,

1239
01:03:45,280 --> 01:03:48,680
Speaker 1: they can't all be trans. She looks gorgeous so much

1240
01:03:48,720 --> 01:03:50,560
Speaker 1: so they're like on the show they talk about I'm

1241
01:03:50,600 --> 01:03:53,200
Speaker 1: still stuck on non binary offset, So what is it

1242
01:03:53,240 --> 01:03:58,560
Speaker 1: about her to make her not scroll up? And yes,

1243
01:03:58,720 --> 01:04:05,720
Speaker 1: she is pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty.

1244
01:04:06,000 --> 01:04:08,160
Speaker 1: You gotta give me some slack. I get it. So

1245
01:04:09,080 --> 01:04:12,720
Speaker 1: non binary, but when you're non binary, you're somebody who

1246
01:04:12,720 --> 01:04:15,240
Speaker 1: doesn't You don't want to be claimed by either one

1247
01:04:15,240 --> 01:04:19,240
Speaker 1: of those flexes, right, So India is neither super masculine

1248
01:04:19,320 --> 01:04:21,240
Speaker 1: or super feminine. India likes to ride the way of

1249
01:04:21,320 --> 01:04:23,160
Speaker 1: both of those things. It's more of a two spirits

1250
01:04:23,200 --> 01:04:26,800
Speaker 1: sort of deal. Can you switch between like just be

1251
01:04:27,240 --> 01:04:31,320
Speaker 1: if your trans? Can you just be with the non

1252
01:04:31,400 --> 01:04:34,320
Speaker 1: binary slash Andrews and the spectrum of everything? You can

1253
01:04:34,360 --> 01:04:36,400
Speaker 1: do what you want? Can you talk about two spirit

1254
01:04:36,480 --> 01:04:40,080
Speaker 1: I just learned that term this year at pride Um.

1255
01:04:40,360 --> 01:04:43,400
Speaker 1: I felt bad too. That was like, yeah, I saw

1256
01:04:43,480 --> 01:04:46,520
Speaker 1: the tea, But that's the thing that So the trans

1257
01:04:46,960 --> 01:04:50,280
Speaker 1: there's transgen transgender, and then there's a trans umbrella that

1258
01:04:50,360 --> 01:04:53,200
Speaker 1: everything that's kind of like under that scope falls under.

1259
01:04:53,280 --> 01:04:57,320
Speaker 1: So there's transgender, two spirits, gender nonconforming. A sexual is

1260
01:04:57,320 --> 01:05:00,320
Speaker 1: now a part of our umbrella as well. Um, there's

1261
01:05:00,320 --> 01:05:03,280
Speaker 1: a bunch of things that fall underneath that trans umbrella,

1262
01:05:03,360 --> 01:05:05,560
Speaker 1: and two spirit is just basically like another. It's like

1263
01:05:05,600 --> 01:05:09,280
Speaker 1: a hyper sensualized version of somebody who identifies himself as

1264
01:05:09,320 --> 01:05:13,880
Speaker 1: not binary or somebody who identified themselves as um androgyn

1265
01:05:13,960 --> 01:05:16,439
Speaker 1: is like Grace Jones and boy George and all those

1266
01:05:16,480 --> 01:05:18,760
Speaker 1: people who like play around with the idea of gender

1267
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:20,760
Speaker 1: rules and the way that gender is supposed to go.

1268
01:05:21,320 --> 01:05:24,640
Speaker 1: So right, Prince, So somebody like India takes it a

1269
01:05:24,680 --> 01:05:26,840
Speaker 1: step further and says that not only do I not

1270
01:05:27,000 --> 01:05:30,880
Speaker 1: follow these necessarily like these binary things about what gender means,

1271
01:05:31,040 --> 01:05:33,480
Speaker 1: but I'm also not going to follow the social economic

1272
01:05:33,520 --> 01:05:36,720
Speaker 1: rules of binary and gender. So if I'm with somebody,

1273
01:05:36,800 --> 01:05:39,440
Speaker 1: if he does identify as asis male, India might say, well,

1274
01:05:39,480 --> 01:05:42,280
Speaker 1: I understand that like film presenting, people aren't supposed to

1275
01:05:42,320 --> 01:05:44,800
Speaker 1: pay their own check, but I'm paying the check because

1276
01:05:45,320 --> 01:05:47,360
Speaker 1: I got it. You know, how do you feel about

1277
01:05:47,400 --> 01:05:49,640
Speaker 1: Because I feel like I'm fake, wote like I'm WoT,

1278
01:05:49,800 --> 01:05:52,760
Speaker 1: but I feel like gender reveal parties are a big deal.

1279
01:05:52,800 --> 01:05:55,440
Speaker 1: I don't really want I don't think a kid necessarily

1280
01:05:55,480 --> 01:05:58,160
Speaker 1: needs to have X because like what about for medical reasons.

1281
01:05:58,160 --> 01:05:59,840
Speaker 1: I want you to know without having to take my

1282
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:02,320
Speaker 1: it's diaper off. Like how you know what's common in

1283
01:06:02,440 --> 01:06:04,160
Speaker 1: boys or girls when they grow up? How do you

1284
01:06:04,240 --> 01:06:07,920
Speaker 1: feel about gender reveals or gender parties or assigning gender

1285
01:06:07,920 --> 01:06:11,120
Speaker 1: at birth? I think that it's stupid, like to me, like,

1286
01:06:11,160 --> 01:06:13,040
Speaker 1: I don't like the baby showering in the showering of

1287
01:06:13,080 --> 01:06:15,439
Speaker 1: moms who might be a need with like gifts or

1288
01:06:15,520 --> 01:06:17,120
Speaker 1: you know, just coming to celebrate a mom who might

1289
01:06:17,120 --> 01:06:19,720
Speaker 1: have been having a tough ass pregnancy. That I get, Like,

1290
01:06:19,760 --> 01:06:21,640
Speaker 1: I'm not against baby showers, but the whole idea of

1291
01:06:21,640 --> 01:06:25,000
Speaker 1: this gender reveal and like lately people crying because they

1292
01:06:25,040 --> 01:06:27,240
Speaker 1: got like either a boy or a girl, Like that

1293
01:06:27,240 --> 01:06:30,240
Speaker 1: ship is fucking retarded. So you you feel like gender

1294
01:06:30,280 --> 01:06:32,400
Speaker 1: reveals or what? Honest? I just think that the unnecessary

1295
01:06:32,440 --> 01:06:35,520
Speaker 1: and especially because with with these new days, your child

1296
01:06:35,560 --> 01:06:37,760
Speaker 1: is growing up in the completely new America. Like when

1297
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:39,760
Speaker 1: I was growing up, I didn't know, Like I remember

1298
01:06:39,760 --> 01:06:43,400
Speaker 1: my mom telling me after this one incident if I

1299
01:06:43,440 --> 01:06:45,680
Speaker 1: ever came home as anything other than her son, that

1300
01:06:45,760 --> 01:06:48,280
Speaker 1: she didn't know me any power. I was like seven,

1301
01:06:48,440 --> 01:06:51,200
Speaker 1: How old did you do you? Did you when you

1302
01:06:51,200 --> 01:06:54,360
Speaker 1: were growing up, Um, did you feel like? Okay? I

1303
01:06:54,600 --> 01:06:58,120
Speaker 1: was a gay boy, proud, loud, proud and strong until

1304
01:06:58,120 --> 01:07:02,440
Speaker 1: I was about nineteen. Okay, Like I never had any

1305
01:07:02,520 --> 01:07:05,080
Speaker 1: other idea, Like I was always feminine. There was always

1306
01:07:05,120 --> 01:07:08,040
Speaker 1: like we even makeup and all that jazz. But I

1307
01:07:08,120 --> 01:07:10,040
Speaker 1: never like, first of all, I didn't know I had

1308
01:07:10,040 --> 01:07:12,000
Speaker 1: a choice. So at seven, my mom is telling me

1309
01:07:12,040 --> 01:07:14,160
Speaker 1: if you ever come home as anything other than my son,

1310
01:07:14,800 --> 01:07:17,160
Speaker 1: I'm like, bitch, I have an option, Like what you mean,

1311
01:07:17,360 --> 01:07:19,400
Speaker 1: Like what want me to say that if she catch

1312
01:07:19,400 --> 01:07:21,800
Speaker 1: you in clothes or no? Um, a guy that she

1313
01:07:21,920 --> 01:07:23,920
Speaker 1: was dating, I had a really bad day at school.

1314
01:07:24,320 --> 01:07:27,200
Speaker 1: Uh fucking third grader. I don't know, but I had

1315
01:07:27,240 --> 01:07:28,880
Speaker 1: a bad day at school and I'm walking home and

1316
01:07:28,920 --> 01:07:31,480
Speaker 1: a guy that she was dating, hood Nigga, was across

1317
01:07:31,520 --> 01:07:33,760
Speaker 1: the street with his homeboys and he was trying to

1318
01:07:33,800 --> 01:07:35,480
Speaker 1: speak to me, but because I had a bad day,

1319
01:07:35,520 --> 01:07:37,680
Speaker 1: I was adding into no seven year old I'm like, fuck,

1320
01:07:37,680 --> 01:07:39,120
Speaker 1: you ain't talking to you today, Like I don't have

1321
01:07:39,160 --> 01:07:42,280
Speaker 1: time for this bullshit. And I kept walking. And so

1322
01:07:42,600 --> 01:07:45,360
Speaker 1: that Saturday, I'm sitting in the room with my grandparents

1323
01:07:45,360 --> 01:07:48,560
Speaker 1: and my mom comes in, storming, raging, Cusin screaming, yelling

1324
01:07:48,600 --> 01:07:50,760
Speaker 1: and fussing and beating the ship out of me and

1325
01:07:50,840 --> 01:07:52,919
Speaker 1: me and my grandparents like what the funk? Like I'm

1326
01:07:52,920 --> 01:07:54,680
Speaker 1: thinking back, like you as you getting your ass well

1327
01:07:54,720 --> 01:07:56,160
Speaker 1: for something that you don't know about, you thinking like

1328
01:07:56,160 --> 01:07:57,400
Speaker 1: what did I do in school? Like what did I?

1329
01:07:57,840 --> 01:07:59,760
Speaker 1: And she's just like La Motte told me, he tried

1330
01:07:59,800 --> 01:08:02,280
Speaker 1: to seak to you and you walked away switching like

1331
01:08:02,320 --> 01:08:04,000
Speaker 1: a little bit. And I was like, oh, that's what

1332
01:08:04,080 --> 01:08:06,320
Speaker 1: this is about. It wasn't because I didn't speak. It

1333
01:08:06,360 --> 01:08:09,040
Speaker 1: was because he specifically said that I walked away switching

1334
01:08:09,080 --> 01:08:11,000
Speaker 1: like a girl, and he was in front of all

1335
01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:13,240
Speaker 1: his homeboys, and so there was a conversation about me

1336
01:08:13,320 --> 01:08:16,880
Speaker 1: that ensued after that because you're dating his mom. How

1337
01:08:16,880 --> 01:08:20,479
Speaker 1: did your mom feel about your Oh now we're now,

1338
01:08:20,520 --> 01:08:22,120
Speaker 1: we're good. I would have never like you couldn't have

1339
01:08:22,200 --> 01:08:26,840
Speaker 1: told me even three years ago she was transpic Now

1340
01:08:27,040 --> 01:08:28,960
Speaker 1: do you feel like your mom was more comfortable with

1341
01:08:29,040 --> 01:08:34,599
Speaker 1: you being? Definitely and definitely Like she swallowed that pill

1342
01:08:34,720 --> 01:08:37,559
Speaker 1: so easy. It was almost like she had her moments

1343
01:08:37,560 --> 01:08:41,280
Speaker 1: where she said ignorant things, but she was not ignorant,

1344
01:08:41,320 --> 01:08:43,080
Speaker 1: like even beforehand, like I don't think that my mom

1345
01:08:43,120 --> 01:08:46,600
Speaker 1: was ever ignorant about you know, like LGBT people. She

1346
01:08:46,680 --> 01:08:49,320
Speaker 1: had like stereotypical black thoughts about it, but she wasn't

1347
01:08:49,320 --> 01:08:52,080
Speaker 1: really ignorant to the idea. But it was one of

1348
01:08:52,080 --> 01:08:55,160
Speaker 1: those things where when I initially transition, because there was

1349
01:08:55,160 --> 01:08:57,160
Speaker 1: no conversation like how most people sit their parents down,

1350
01:08:57,160 --> 01:09:00,160
Speaker 1: like the gay conversation. That happened. The trans conversation was

1351
01:09:00,240 --> 01:09:01,840
Speaker 1: I went to college and I came back home. Were

1352
01:09:01,840 --> 01:09:05,040
Speaker 1: you comfortable being gay in school with your mom? Like? Yeah,

1353
01:09:05,280 --> 01:09:07,400
Speaker 1: like that was. It didn't get bad with her for

1354
01:09:07,439 --> 01:09:09,400
Speaker 1: the gay thing until I got my first serious boyfriend

1355
01:09:09,560 --> 01:09:12,120
Speaker 1: and then she knew it was like you gay game? Yeah,

1356
01:09:12,760 --> 01:09:15,479
Speaker 1: when you were gay, did you identify as a game?

1357
01:09:15,760 --> 01:09:19,599
Speaker 1: Did you ever want to be Did you see yourself

1358
01:09:19,640 --> 01:09:22,560
Speaker 1: as a woman? I saw, and that's a that's a

1359
01:09:22,600 --> 01:09:25,280
Speaker 1: really And I talked about that in my book Too Shame,

1360
01:09:25,360 --> 01:09:32,800
Speaker 1: this BLOGOK, Becoming Hope, Removing the disguise. Uh So that

1361
01:09:32,920 --> 01:09:35,160
Speaker 1: was one of those things where I would constantly dream

1362
01:09:35,160 --> 01:09:38,280
Speaker 1: about this woman and she was this gorgeous girl with

1363
01:09:38,280 --> 01:09:40,200
Speaker 1: this black hair in these beautiful blonde highlights, and I

1364
01:09:40,200 --> 01:09:44,640
Speaker 1: don't know where this bitch was coming from. Girl but

1365
01:09:45,160 --> 01:09:47,400
Speaker 1: I would see this girl all the time, but at

1366
01:09:47,439 --> 01:09:49,120
Speaker 1: that point, like I guess I was, I don't. I

1367
01:09:49,120 --> 01:09:51,679
Speaker 1: didn't have verbage for it. So I would just see

1368
01:09:51,720 --> 01:09:53,680
Speaker 1: and I knew that it was me, but I was like,

1369
01:09:53,800 --> 01:09:54,880
Speaker 1: I don't want to be a girl. I think I'm

1370
01:09:54,920 --> 01:09:58,800
Speaker 1: just gonna play with the weed. OK. And so for

1371
01:09:58,880 --> 01:10:01,200
Speaker 1: the longest time, I spent a lot of time just

1372
01:10:01,240 --> 01:10:03,719
Speaker 1: thinking like I'm I'm a feminist. And then I found

1373
01:10:03,720 --> 01:10:04,920
Speaker 1: out what I dropped to me. I was like, oh,

1374
01:10:04,960 --> 01:10:07,160
Speaker 1: I'm dropping this. I'm like Grace Shan's like I'm doing

1375
01:10:07,200 --> 01:10:11,679
Speaker 1: this like funky fashion thing. And I was finding myself

1376
01:10:11,720 --> 01:10:14,840
Speaker 1: like it was just like a little by little. I

1377
01:10:14,880 --> 01:10:18,160
Speaker 1: was on a panel once with some citty white people

1378
01:10:18,200 --> 01:10:20,040
Speaker 1: shout out to the good twenty seven that are listening,

1379
01:10:20,800 --> 01:10:24,639
Speaker 1: and one of them told me that I was going

1380
01:10:24,760 --> 01:10:27,519
Speaker 1: so hard for trans people when there's a higher rate

1381
01:10:27,600 --> 01:10:31,879
Speaker 1: of trans people killing themselves once they transition. Finally, Um,

1382
01:10:32,000 --> 01:10:34,120
Speaker 1: has there had there been a time where you were like, funk,

1383
01:10:34,160 --> 01:10:37,880
Speaker 1: I did the wrong thing? Uh No, that's amazing. I

1384
01:10:37,920 --> 01:10:42,760
Speaker 1: wanted to hurt myself before transitioning. Um. But the life expectancy,

1385
01:10:42,800 --> 01:10:46,800
Speaker 1: by the way from blot Figger that's from getting killed

1386
01:10:46,840 --> 01:10:49,760
Speaker 1: by someone else and killing yourself. Why what's up? I mean,

1387
01:10:49,800 --> 01:10:55,400
Speaker 1: I get the other turmoil, Like mentally an emotion of

1388
01:10:55,479 --> 01:10:58,479
Speaker 1: the transitioning is draining because a lot of trans people

1389
01:10:58,479 --> 01:11:00,520
Speaker 1: who are doing this are doing this without a support system.

1390
01:11:00,760 --> 01:11:04,160
Speaker 1: Fortunately I have several of them, but there are a

1391
01:11:04,200 --> 01:11:05,800
Speaker 1: lot of trans women who are doing this, and then

1392
01:11:05,840 --> 01:11:08,120
Speaker 1: they're looking at the people of the world like Maya Scott,

1393
01:11:08,400 --> 01:11:11,479
Speaker 1: like India, like um, you know, like ts Madison and

1394
01:11:11,520 --> 01:11:14,960
Speaker 1: all these beautiful trans women who are on social media,

1395
01:11:15,000 --> 01:11:16,559
Speaker 1: and they're like, I'm never going to be that. I

1396
01:11:16,600 --> 01:11:19,920
Speaker 1: am a six ft five guy who played you know,

1397
01:11:19,960 --> 01:11:22,320
Speaker 1: football most of his life. I'm never gonna be that small.

1398
01:11:22,360 --> 01:11:24,640
Speaker 1: I'm never gonna pass, I'm never gonna whatever. How do

1399
01:11:24,680 --> 01:11:27,360
Speaker 1: you feel about trans popular trans women like Caitlyn Jenner.

1400
01:11:27,880 --> 01:11:30,320
Speaker 1: First of all, Caitlyn Jenner, we don't claim her. I

1401
01:11:30,320 --> 01:11:34,800
Speaker 1: didn't think that we don't claim her, but because she's

1402
01:11:34,800 --> 01:11:37,200
Speaker 1: problematic as ship um and I think that she's problematic

1403
01:11:37,200 --> 01:11:39,519
Speaker 1: because she doesn't realize that she's problematic. And then even

1404
01:11:39,560 --> 01:11:40,920
Speaker 1: once she realized that some of the things that she

1405
01:11:40,960 --> 01:11:44,519
Speaker 1: said was problematic, she doesn't go about apologizing in a

1406
01:11:44,600 --> 01:11:47,040
Speaker 1: way that shows that you stand in solidarity. She's like

1407
01:11:47,080 --> 01:11:50,000
Speaker 1: the super Trump supporter. But even beyond that. What I

1408
01:11:50,080 --> 01:11:52,360
Speaker 1: was curious, why I wanted to ask that question was

1409
01:11:52,400 --> 01:11:55,160
Speaker 1: because Taylor Swift video. Okay, mat right, can we do

1410
01:11:55,200 --> 01:12:00,000
Speaker 1: Tom Devins Vincent, you guys got a long episode today.

1411
01:12:00,040 --> 01:12:02,880
Speaker 1: We got a great dialogue on here. Taylor Swift had

1412
01:12:02,880 --> 01:12:06,160
Speaker 1: a video where she had a bunch of gay niggas

1413
01:12:06,160 --> 01:12:09,040
Speaker 1: in it. Lance Bastman saying, Laverne Cox, who is the

1414
01:12:09,080 --> 01:12:10,800
Speaker 1: trans women from Orange's a new Black I don't if

1415
01:12:10,800 --> 01:12:13,400
Speaker 1: you know her, just very like for the people video,

1416
01:12:13,479 --> 01:12:16,200
Speaker 1: but we all know the same ship, and people felt

1417
01:12:16,200 --> 01:12:18,479
Speaker 1: like it was pandering. Now. I had a really good

1418
01:12:18,479 --> 01:12:20,800
Speaker 1: conversation with my gay friends, my closest gay friends, Bennie

1419
01:12:20,800 --> 01:12:23,160
Speaker 1: and Christopher, and I think one of them were saying,

1420
01:12:23,200 --> 01:12:25,360
Speaker 1: this is bullshit and the other one was saying, fuck it.

1421
01:12:25,520 --> 01:12:27,040
Speaker 1: Now is out there, Like, I don't give a funk

1422
01:12:27,080 --> 01:12:28,800
Speaker 1: how the message gets out, as long as it's there.

1423
01:12:29,400 --> 01:12:32,240
Speaker 1: Is Caitlyn Jenner good for white people to see in

1424
01:12:32,360 --> 01:12:35,160
Speaker 1: mainstream people to see a trans woman or not, because

1425
01:12:35,160 --> 01:12:38,240
Speaker 1: she's not an ideal model of what we want a

1426
01:12:38,240 --> 01:12:41,120
Speaker 1: trans woman to represent. Is she necessary or is she not.

1427
01:12:42,400 --> 01:12:45,320
Speaker 1: I think the conversation that she facilitated was necessary, but

1428
01:12:45,360 --> 01:12:47,360
Speaker 1: it also shows us how the conversation that we were

1429
01:12:47,400 --> 01:12:50,720
Speaker 1: already having as people, um, as people of color, was

1430
01:12:50,760 --> 01:12:54,320
Speaker 1: ignored because Laverne Cox was already on Anges of Black Way,

1431
01:12:54,360 --> 01:12:57,080
Speaker 1: before Laverne Cox had been on the cover of Time,

1432
01:12:57,240 --> 01:12:59,680
Speaker 1: Laverne Cox had already gotten Mark was in something I

1433
01:12:59,720 --> 01:13:02,920
Speaker 1: heard Jennet Mark. Yeah, Jennet Mark was a freaking CNN

1434
01:13:03,040 --> 01:13:06,080
Speaker 1: like announcer, Like I didn't know she had a whole

1435
01:13:06,120 --> 01:13:08,640
Speaker 1: podcast on the same network as Angela right, Like she

1436
01:13:08,800 --> 01:13:12,320
Speaker 1: was doing things right. Um, we had so many black

1437
01:13:12,360 --> 01:13:14,559
Speaker 1: trans women who were doing t. S Madison, whether it

1438
01:13:14,560 --> 01:13:17,120
Speaker 1: was probabatic or not. Tis Madison was paving the way

1439
01:13:17,200 --> 01:13:20,040
Speaker 1: for trans women on social media. And so then you

1440
01:13:20,120 --> 01:13:23,080
Speaker 1: have this sixties something year old white man who decides

1441
01:13:23,120 --> 01:13:26,320
Speaker 1: I'm going to embrace this truth and become Caitlin, and

1442
01:13:26,360 --> 01:13:29,280
Speaker 1: now the world stops. Now the world says, I want

1443
01:13:29,280 --> 01:13:33,720
Speaker 1: to pay attention, and it's like we need I have

1444
01:13:33,760 --> 01:13:37,120
Speaker 1: a question. I have a question. I know you have

1445
01:13:37,200 --> 01:13:39,320
Speaker 1: a couple of left, but there's some questions from listeners,

1446
01:13:39,320 --> 01:13:41,840
Speaker 1: a really good one. So my thing is, um, how

1447
01:13:41,840 --> 01:13:46,559
Speaker 1: do we I feel like trans is their own section

1448
01:13:46,760 --> 01:13:48,680
Speaker 1: of the community. I think I feel like head of

1449
01:13:48,800 --> 01:13:53,280
Speaker 1: rules their own sexual LGBT s. How do we get

1450
01:13:53,320 --> 01:13:58,040
Speaker 1: it to be more than everybody is in each is

1451
01:13:58,080 --> 01:14:00,920
Speaker 1: having this conversation together, because I feel like even if

1452
01:14:00,960 --> 01:14:03,760
Speaker 1: t S. Madison's maybe you got the girls that are

1453
01:14:03,760 --> 01:14:06,960
Speaker 1: cool with the gay people that have watched the thing

1454
01:14:07,000 --> 01:14:10,080
Speaker 1: with Tiffany had or you know, trans, they'll watch it,

1455
01:14:10,080 --> 01:14:13,320
Speaker 1: but the hetero sexual people won't just turn and watch it.

1456
01:14:13,439 --> 01:14:15,679
Speaker 1: They'll say, oh, that's a trans girl and they'll fast forward.

1457
01:14:15,720 --> 01:14:19,040
Speaker 1: Or how do we do that? Like, what exactly is

1458
01:14:19,080 --> 01:14:23,879
Speaker 1: the bill that this community like this right by continuing

1459
01:14:23,920 --> 01:14:27,479
Speaker 1: to infiltrate spaces like this and so shameless and spaces

1460
01:14:27,520 --> 01:14:31,280
Speaker 1: wear black hetero sist men getting people to feel congregate

1461
01:14:31,360 --> 01:14:34,040
Speaker 1: one right? And so having Janet mac on the Breakfast

1462
01:14:34,080 --> 01:14:36,760
Speaker 1: Club was like a thing even Sydney starts problematic and

1463
01:14:36,840 --> 01:14:40,519
Speaker 1: she was just trying to do she was doing the

1464
01:14:40,680 --> 01:14:45,040
Speaker 1: thing about trying to expode like Sydney Stars. She was like,

1465
01:14:45,160 --> 01:14:48,720
Speaker 1: she's for she's forcing more hetero dudes that like that

1466
01:14:48,960 --> 01:14:50,320
Speaker 1: to say, all right, I don't like it. I don't

1467
01:14:50,320 --> 01:14:52,000
Speaker 1: like it. I'm not that guy. But my thing is

1468
01:14:52,160 --> 01:14:54,800
Speaker 1: that that's your issue though, like it's only because my

1469
01:14:54,840 --> 01:14:57,479
Speaker 1: thing is exposing. It is only a powerful tool because

1470
01:14:57,560 --> 01:15:00,439
Speaker 1: niggas give a about being getting exposed. But there's also

1471
01:15:00,479 --> 01:15:04,479
Speaker 1: the community that's all right, So let's listen to Sydney.

1472
01:15:05,760 --> 01:15:08,880
Speaker 1: I didn't like, Okay, could you date somebody that wanted

1473
01:15:08,920 --> 01:15:12,000
Speaker 1: to be a little bit closet about your relationship? That's

1474
01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:14,439
Speaker 1: a good question. That question I want to ask because

1475
01:15:15,000 --> 01:15:17,880
Speaker 1: whereas like I was saying okay with Sydney, like she's

1476
01:15:17,920 --> 01:15:22,040
Speaker 1: exposing nigga, because we really want someone who's out now

1477
01:15:22,320 --> 01:15:24,599
Speaker 1: with my gay male friends, some of them will date

1478
01:15:25,080 --> 01:15:29,639
Speaker 1: men who are in the closet a little like download dudes. Also,

1479
01:15:30,200 --> 01:15:32,000
Speaker 1: you can hang with a nigga and just get lunch,

1480
01:15:33,040 --> 01:15:34,280
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, and be like, oh, there's

1481
01:15:34,280 --> 01:15:39,559
Speaker 1: my people. It's a totally different thing. You could. You

1482
01:15:39,560 --> 01:15:42,400
Speaker 1: know how much confidence you gotta have in your sexuality,

1483
01:15:42,800 --> 01:15:45,160
Speaker 1: Like say, for me, I say, if I met up

1484
01:15:45,200 --> 01:15:47,680
Speaker 1: with Hope right now, let's just go to lunch. Do

1485
01:15:47,920 --> 01:15:50,840
Speaker 1: people gonna be like, yo, tow's with. I gotta be

1486
01:15:51,080 --> 01:15:53,360
Speaker 1: super secure on myself and all that to be able

1487
01:15:53,400 --> 01:15:55,280
Speaker 1: to deal with that one. Because that's why I said,

1488
01:15:55,280 --> 01:15:56,519
Speaker 1: I know you go through a lot of stuff. That's

1489
01:15:56,520 --> 01:15:58,760
Speaker 1: why I meant like that because I know what had

1490
01:15:58,760 --> 01:16:01,680
Speaker 1: happened to me. If I was to do that, now,

1491
01:16:01,720 --> 01:16:03,120
Speaker 1: they're gonna be like, oh, you did you this, you this,

1492
01:16:03,160 --> 01:16:04,759
Speaker 1: you this, you this. And I got to be super

1493
01:16:04,760 --> 01:16:07,640
Speaker 1: confident in myself and who I am and proud that

1494
01:16:07,760 --> 01:16:09,920
Speaker 1: I have a trans friend and like, that's why I

1495
01:16:09,960 --> 01:16:13,360
Speaker 1: don't give a funk what you're talking about. But Reese

1496
01:16:13,800 --> 01:16:19,840
Speaker 1: went through that and it was continuous. People will talk

1497
01:16:20,080 --> 01:16:24,559
Speaker 1: about mouth. I really love Mouse. He is always posted

1498
01:16:24,640 --> 01:16:28,400
Speaker 1: his gay gass friends on a honeymoon kissing, talking with

1499
01:16:28,439 --> 01:16:31,639
Speaker 1: gay niggas out here. Like I was at my show,

1500
01:16:32,160 --> 01:16:35,000
Speaker 1: the one I did with Jesse and I did a

1501
01:16:35,040 --> 01:16:36,960
Speaker 1: dick sucking contest and I had one of my gay

1502
01:16:37,040 --> 01:16:39,080
Speaker 1: niggas come up and Mouse was like that nigga is

1503
01:16:39,080 --> 01:16:45,320
Speaker 1: getting it in No one has ever. I've never seen

1504
01:16:45,360 --> 01:16:49,519
Speaker 1: it them talking to something like it wasn't Drome. Actually

1505
01:16:49,520 --> 01:16:51,799
Speaker 1: that was in Atlanta. That was you and Drone. Jerome

1506
01:16:51,920 --> 01:16:54,240
Speaker 1: was getting I was actually talking specifically about that show.

1507
01:16:54,520 --> 01:16:56,439
Speaker 1: But and you hosted that show. And that's the thing.

1508
01:16:56,479 --> 01:16:59,560
Speaker 1: It's like, when you show your confidence, that's right, you

1509
01:16:59,600 --> 01:17:03,480
Speaker 1: did it with your shot Jerome Trammel from Atlanta, nobody

1510
01:17:03,640 --> 01:17:06,599
Speaker 1: is gonna and that's the thing. Why not you? Why

1511
01:17:06,640 --> 01:17:09,760
Speaker 1: don't they be like that nigga. And it's the confidence

1512
01:17:09,760 --> 01:17:13,920
Speaker 1: that you exude and that's the difference, like that, don't

1513
01:17:14,120 --> 01:17:16,040
Speaker 1: do that. I had to make that. I had to

1514
01:17:16,120 --> 01:17:20,559
Speaker 1: make a conscious choice, especially with Jerome um, to say,

1515
01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:23,360
Speaker 1: you know what, fuck that, this is my chance right

1516
01:17:23,400 --> 01:17:28,599
Speaker 1: now to say I ain't scared. Yeah, and I try

1517
01:17:28,640 --> 01:17:31,720
Speaker 1: to continuously do that. But I have a history of

1518
01:17:31,880 --> 01:17:36,719
Speaker 1: being homophobia, so I had to make a conscious choice

1519
01:17:36,720 --> 01:17:39,559
Speaker 1: to say, yo, you know what, he's a person regards

1520
01:17:39,560 --> 01:17:42,599
Speaker 1: of anything else, whatever these choices are in life, however

1521
01:17:42,640 --> 01:17:46,000
Speaker 1: he lives his life whatever, respect this person as a

1522
01:17:46,080 --> 01:17:50,479
Speaker 1: human being. Fuck everything else. It's not my business. My

1523
01:17:50,520 --> 01:17:56,960
Speaker 1: business is that he is a human. It looks like

1524
01:17:57,520 --> 01:18:01,400
Speaker 1: recently said whenever niggas he said something about hope un

1525
01:18:01,439 --> 01:18:03,120
Speaker 1: quote number, you can't only say when we are gonna,

1526
01:18:03,120 --> 01:18:05,920
Speaker 1: are you evened the maybe saying you are gay? Nigea,

1527
01:18:05,960 --> 01:18:07,599
Speaker 1: he'd be like, why are you worried about my sex?

1528
01:18:08,400 --> 01:18:10,400
Speaker 1: Like why the funk are you worried about what? Dick?

1529
01:18:10,439 --> 01:18:13,479
Speaker 1: Obviously are you gay? And it's crazy how people are

1530
01:18:13,560 --> 01:18:17,080
Speaker 1: so obsessed with the sex that you have because that's

1531
01:18:17,120 --> 01:18:19,240
Speaker 1: what my thing is. So let me be very clear.

1532
01:18:19,280 --> 01:18:21,200
Speaker 1: But that's how we all define out. But let me

1533
01:18:21,240 --> 01:18:23,599
Speaker 1: be very clear about it. If if Tyler took me out,

1534
01:18:24,120 --> 01:18:27,799
Speaker 1: it would be a question, oh damn they because I'm attractive.

1535
01:18:28,320 --> 01:18:30,200
Speaker 1: But if he's too Caitlyn Jinn or out, it would

1536
01:18:30,200 --> 01:18:33,040
Speaker 1: be jokes about taking Caitlyn Jinner out because nobody wants

1537
01:18:33,080 --> 01:18:36,200
Speaker 1: to fun Caitlyn Jenner. They're joking on you because they

1538
01:18:36,240 --> 01:18:38,439
Speaker 1: would suck. That's a hell of a good point. They're

1539
01:18:38,520 --> 01:18:41,360
Speaker 1: joking on you because they would hear you. You know

1540
01:18:41,400 --> 01:18:44,640
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, That would be real. I don't be

1541
01:18:46,320 --> 01:18:49,360
Speaker 1: I don't like him. I'm sorry. I didn't like Bruce.

1542
01:18:50,040 --> 01:18:52,559
Speaker 1: Nobody likes Bruce. I didn't. I just felt like Bruce

1543
01:18:52,600 --> 01:18:55,160
Speaker 1: was phony man, and I didn't like him. And I

1544
01:18:55,160 --> 01:18:58,479
Speaker 1: don't like Caitlyn because I think she's phony too. Yeah,

1545
01:18:58,479 --> 01:19:01,680
Speaker 1: And I'm glad she's said it's hiding it all And

1546
01:19:01,720 --> 01:19:05,160
Speaker 1: I just think he's he was the whole entity of

1547
01:19:05,479 --> 01:19:08,720
Speaker 1: Bruce Slash. It's just weird, Like you just don't get it.

1548
01:19:08,880 --> 01:19:10,680
Speaker 1: You just don't think. Also, it's hard for us to

1549
01:19:10,720 --> 01:19:14,240
Speaker 1: respect because there's always such a circus around Kardashians, so

1550
01:19:14,360 --> 01:19:16,799
Speaker 1: you want to feel for this person, but like I can't.

1551
01:19:17,800 --> 01:19:20,880
Speaker 1: It's hard watching a millionaire cry about ship. What do

1552
01:19:20,960 --> 01:19:25,839
Speaker 1: we ra time? There's a great question from a listener, Um,

1553
01:19:26,040 --> 01:19:28,719
Speaker 1: do black trans women feel a sense of sisterhood? Assists

1554
01:19:28,720 --> 01:19:32,200
Speaker 1: black women because I feel like, nah, Um, most of

1555
01:19:32,200 --> 01:19:33,800
Speaker 1: the time, I'm going to say that the answer to

1556
01:19:33,880 --> 01:19:36,280
Speaker 1: that is nah. And it's just because you're always worried

1557
01:19:36,280 --> 01:19:39,680
Speaker 1: about what her intentions truly are. Like when I'm in

1558
01:19:39,720 --> 01:19:41,479
Speaker 1: the store and I hate to say, like I just

1559
01:19:41,520 --> 01:19:42,960
Speaker 1: at my job, but like when I'm in the store

1560
01:19:43,000 --> 01:19:44,800
Speaker 1: and a woman tells me that I'm beautiful, I'm pretty

1561
01:19:44,840 --> 01:19:47,280
Speaker 1: unless she's an older woman, because you know, black matriarch

1562
01:19:47,280 --> 01:19:48,920
Speaker 1: don't play that ship of a black old woman tells

1563
01:19:48,920 --> 01:19:52,960
Speaker 1: you beautiful, but beautiful she means she means that ship.

1564
01:19:53,360 --> 01:19:55,880
Speaker 1: But like a lot of the time, when like young

1565
01:19:55,960 --> 01:19:58,160
Speaker 1: sis women are saying like, oh girl, you so pretty,

1566
01:19:58,880 --> 01:20:00,519
Speaker 1: I'm in my mind, I'm saying, so is this your

1567
01:20:00,520 --> 01:20:01,960
Speaker 1: way of telling me that you've clocked me? And I'm

1568
01:20:01,960 --> 01:20:05,400
Speaker 1: cute for a trans girl because it's happened like I

1569
01:20:05,439 --> 01:20:08,760
Speaker 1: had a girl like one time about four months ago,

1570
01:20:09,720 --> 01:20:12,240
Speaker 1: I'm bringing her up and she's sitting there and she's

1571
01:20:12,240 --> 01:20:14,240
Speaker 1: just like, oh, yeah, like girl, because I went to

1572
01:20:14,280 --> 01:20:16,160
Speaker 1: Miami before. You from Miami, right, And I was like, yeah,

1573
01:20:16,160 --> 01:20:18,040
Speaker 1: I'm from Miami. She's like, yeah, I went to this

1574
01:20:18,160 --> 01:20:20,320
Speaker 1: drag brunch girl the drag like and like she was

1575
01:20:20,640 --> 01:20:22,360
Speaker 1: laying in on that and then at the end of

1576
01:20:22,360 --> 01:20:25,040
Speaker 1: the entire transition let me know that she was cool.

1577
01:20:25,600 --> 01:20:27,160
Speaker 1: And then at the end of it, she's just like, oh,

1578
01:20:27,360 --> 01:20:28,840
Speaker 1: and girl, by the way, you are working and you

1579
01:20:28,840 --> 01:20:30,960
Speaker 1: are just but you wouldn't you wouldn't address But do

1580
01:20:31,000 --> 01:20:34,679
Speaker 1: you realize that she doesn't know that's offensive? Like she's

1581
01:20:34,720 --> 01:20:40,320
Speaker 1: really trying. I've stopped telling trans women that they're pretty

1582
01:20:40,360 --> 01:20:43,240
Speaker 1: that I don't like. Now I'll just talk about their clothes,

1583
01:20:43,400 --> 01:20:45,439
Speaker 1: I'm talking about your shoot, I'll talk about something else.

1584
01:20:45,520 --> 01:20:49,479
Speaker 1: But you still because I know I could. I've watched it.

1585
01:20:49,960 --> 01:20:53,280
Speaker 1: I've seen it happen when it's a genuine compliment, right,

1586
01:20:53,400 --> 01:20:56,599
Speaker 1: and I could see like, because now you're feeling like, Okay,

1587
01:20:56,640 --> 01:20:57,600
Speaker 1: why do you need to tell the girl next to

1588
01:20:57,600 --> 01:21:01,360
Speaker 1: me she was pretty? Maybe she's not pretty, maybe she's not,

1589
01:21:01,439 --> 01:21:04,200
Speaker 1: but like, why me and I feel like that's the thing,

1590
01:21:04,280 --> 01:21:07,439
Speaker 1: Like why single me out because it's it's not do

1591
01:21:07,600 --> 01:21:09,720
Speaker 1: you say it's the way like and people you know

1592
01:21:09,800 --> 01:21:11,960
Speaker 1: when somebody but even it's just the way I say it.

1593
01:21:12,080 --> 01:21:15,400
Speaker 1: You might look at me, is this this this this

1594
01:21:15,560 --> 01:21:18,200
Speaker 1: this head of real and be like no, you're probably

1595
01:21:18,200 --> 01:21:20,840
Speaker 1: saying that because you've got these feelings. No, it's but

1596
01:21:20,960 --> 01:21:23,080
Speaker 1: my thing is when something is authentic and it's genuine

1597
01:21:23,080 --> 01:21:25,759
Speaker 1: and it's just coming from like girl, you it's cute today,

1598
01:21:25,800 --> 01:21:30,400
Speaker 1: Like you're wearing that dress. It's different than m Okay,

1599
01:21:30,400 --> 01:21:32,799
Speaker 1: you thought you got me, but you're cute, like girl, Okay,

1600
01:21:33,200 --> 01:21:35,200
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. And that's but it's also

1601
01:21:35,200 --> 01:21:36,680
Speaker 1: a woman thing. And I think that that's the thing

1602
01:21:36,800 --> 01:21:38,519
Speaker 1: between trans women and this woman. I think that a

1603
01:21:38,560 --> 01:21:40,920
Speaker 1: lot of sis women see it as a competition, Like

1604
01:21:41,040 --> 01:21:43,280
Speaker 1: seeing an attractive trans woman is like, oh damn, this

1605
01:21:43,439 --> 01:21:45,479
Speaker 1: another motherfucker I gotta come up against. And especially when

1606
01:21:45,479 --> 01:21:48,040
Speaker 1: you're a dark skinned black woman. Right, It's just like,

1607
01:21:48,160 --> 01:21:51,519
Speaker 1: as a dark skinned black woman, I got enough things

1608
01:21:51,560 --> 01:21:53,920
Speaker 1: going on in this world. Enough of these niggas telling

1609
01:21:53,960 --> 01:21:56,400
Speaker 1: me I'm not worthy light skinned because I gotta compete

1610
01:21:56,439 --> 01:21:59,120
Speaker 1: with And now I got bitches with dicks, like out

1611
01:21:59,160 --> 01:22:03,920
Speaker 1: here you know what I'm like, and so I get it,

1612
01:22:04,200 --> 01:22:06,320
Speaker 1: and so I understand it coming from a lot of

1613
01:22:06,360 --> 01:22:08,880
Speaker 1: my sisters like women. But it's also like, since I'm

1614
01:22:08,920 --> 01:22:11,000
Speaker 1: not the enemy, I do ship to you. I'm out

1615
01:22:11,000 --> 01:22:12,439
Speaker 1: here trying to get dick like you're trying to get dick.

1616
01:22:12,479 --> 01:22:14,559
Speaker 1: And I'm still a black, dark skinned woman too, So

1617
01:22:14,720 --> 01:22:17,000
Speaker 1: bitches is out here coming for me, like, let's be

1618
01:22:17,360 --> 01:22:19,960
Speaker 1: sisters for real instead of you coming for me. And

1619
01:22:20,000 --> 01:22:22,080
Speaker 1: I think that that's the That's always the thing. It's

1620
01:22:22,080 --> 01:22:25,639
Speaker 1: just like being an attractive trans woman's fucking sucks sometimes

1621
01:22:25,640 --> 01:22:27,479
Speaker 1: because then you have people piste off at you because

1622
01:22:27,479 --> 01:22:31,360
Speaker 1: you're cute, like and it's just like, oh, she's spending

1623
01:22:31,360 --> 01:22:33,200
Speaker 1: all of this money on we even shoes, Like but

1624
01:22:33,439 --> 01:22:35,120
Speaker 1: if you like, you could do the same thing, the

1625
01:22:35,160 --> 01:22:36,840
Speaker 1: same doctor I went to. If you like my books

1626
01:22:36,840 --> 01:22:41,280
Speaker 1: so much, go like it's I'm not this magician, like nothing,

1627
01:22:41,320 --> 01:22:43,719
Speaker 1: none of this ship is just like by osmosis, outside

1628
01:22:43,720 --> 01:22:46,360
Speaker 1: of my genetics. None of this is osmosis. I mean

1629
01:22:46,400 --> 01:22:47,960
Speaker 1: to be fair, you are in the community, and like

1630
01:22:48,200 --> 01:22:50,720
Speaker 1: I feel like if you have a gay friend of

1631
01:22:50,760 --> 01:22:53,240
Speaker 1: your life, you just can't go wrong. So that's really

1632
01:22:53,280 --> 01:22:56,120
Speaker 1: what But that's also a stereoid type though, because I'm

1633
01:22:56,120 --> 01:22:58,960
Speaker 1: not I'm not a gay man's barbie doll though, But

1634
01:22:59,520 --> 01:23:06,519
Speaker 1: let's be all things that are fat, architecture, design, makeup clothes.

1635
01:23:07,000 --> 01:23:11,479
Speaker 1: I'll be pissed when I'll be seeing makeup. I'd be like,

1636
01:23:11,520 --> 01:23:14,840
Speaker 1: how could this happen? Because trans women were the people

1637
01:23:14,880 --> 01:23:17,200
Speaker 1: that were the matrioch. And that's the thing, like this

1638
01:23:17,240 --> 01:23:19,880
Speaker 1: is this last episode opposed should have schooled a lot.

1639
01:23:19,920 --> 01:23:26,760
Speaker 1: What are you saying? Damn it? But makeup? No. So

1640
01:23:26,880 --> 01:23:29,240
Speaker 1: the last episode of the like the final scenes that

1641
01:23:29,439 --> 01:23:32,559
Speaker 1: it talks about the idea that trans women are out

1642
01:23:32,560 --> 01:23:35,400
Speaker 1: here busting their acts. They created these ballroom floors, and

1643
01:23:35,439 --> 01:23:37,719
Speaker 1: then when everything took off, guests who rode the wave

1644
01:23:37,920 --> 01:23:39,720
Speaker 1: gay men, when it was trans women who put their

1645
01:23:39,720 --> 01:23:42,280
Speaker 1: blood and tears into this ship. And it's just like

1646
01:23:42,600 --> 01:23:44,840
Speaker 1: gay men get all of this wrapping this hype for

1647
01:23:45,360 --> 01:23:46,880
Speaker 1: making it this that in the third but it's like

1648
01:23:46,920 --> 01:23:48,880
Speaker 1: transmit more. The women out here doing the research and

1649
01:23:48,960 --> 01:23:51,160
Speaker 1: getting the blueprint from women, and trans women were the

1650
01:23:51,200 --> 01:23:53,839
Speaker 1: ones out here learning from their sisters who were accepting

1651
01:23:53,840 --> 01:23:55,799
Speaker 1: in a time that was it wasn't okay to be accepting,

1652
01:23:56,080 --> 01:23:58,360
Speaker 1: learning from their mothers who were actually like not putting

1653
01:23:58,400 --> 01:24:00,719
Speaker 1: them out of their homes, how to properly apply their makeup,

1654
01:24:00,880 --> 01:24:02,840
Speaker 1: and then taking that to their gay guy friends, and

1655
01:24:02,840 --> 01:24:05,559
Speaker 1: then gay guys were just open enough. So we've so

1656
01:24:05,600 --> 01:24:12,040
Speaker 1: basically I've been blinded by the cloak of gay man. Yes,

1657
01:24:12,160 --> 01:24:13,559
Speaker 1: there's a lot of gay men that will straight up

1658
01:24:13,600 --> 01:24:15,320
Speaker 1: tell you that they don't support and don't like and

1659
01:24:15,320 --> 01:24:16,960
Speaker 1: don't understand. If there's a lot of gay men that

1660
01:24:17,000 --> 01:24:19,080
Speaker 1: if you listen to their conversations they sound just like

1661
01:24:19,120 --> 01:24:21,439
Speaker 1: since head black men, like you would never know that

1662
01:24:21,479 --> 01:24:24,040
Speaker 1: he was gay until he says like like armand Wiggins

1663
01:24:24,120 --> 01:24:27,840
Speaker 1: is in trouble. He's also another um like blogger via

1664
01:24:27,920 --> 01:24:30,040
Speaker 1: the internet's right now that's in trouble because he's always

1665
01:24:30,040 --> 01:24:33,960
Speaker 1: coming for trams girls and he's a like just so

1666
01:24:34,320 --> 01:24:38,559
Speaker 1: when T. S. Madison was just recently on um Nikki's

1667
01:24:38,600 --> 01:24:42,840
Speaker 1: podcast or whatever, he got online and was like, oh, Nikki,

1668
01:24:42,960 --> 01:24:46,120
Speaker 1: you need tell your man friends, like let him know

1669
01:24:46,240 --> 01:24:48,719
Speaker 1: the Alan play with that like indirect, but he's always

1670
01:24:48,760 --> 01:24:50,880
Speaker 1: coming for her. I was on his podcast one day

1671
01:24:50,920 --> 01:24:53,000
Speaker 1: and he came for me like, oh, you're a man though,

1672
01:24:53,040 --> 01:24:54,040
Speaker 1: but at the end of the day, I don't matter

1673
01:24:54,080 --> 01:24:56,280
Speaker 1: how educated you are, you're a man like and it's

1674
01:24:56,320 --> 01:24:59,479
Speaker 1: just like he's a gay black man saying this is

1675
01:24:59,560 --> 01:25:02,200
Speaker 1: my thing is that it's so much like pride, Like

1676
01:25:02,240 --> 01:25:05,719
Speaker 1: we talked about pride and then people will still take

1677
01:25:05,800 --> 01:25:08,760
Speaker 1: that from you for your choice and that's like, yo,

1678
01:25:09,000 --> 01:25:11,200
Speaker 1: she she has a right to be her. I don't

1679
01:25:11,200 --> 01:25:15,320
Speaker 1: know where that this with people feeling like, bro, if

1680
01:25:15,360 --> 01:25:17,600
Speaker 1: you ask what you tell me, you you told me

1681
01:25:17,600 --> 01:25:20,000
Speaker 1: your program pronounced that's what I'm going rocking way for

1682
01:25:20,040 --> 01:25:21,800
Speaker 1: the Rust Show? Why do I give a funk to

1683
01:25:21,840 --> 01:25:24,000
Speaker 1: call you something else? And what does it do for me?

1684
01:25:24,160 --> 01:25:27,720
Speaker 1: And that's the main root of like homophobian racing, Like

1685
01:25:27,800 --> 01:25:29,479
Speaker 1: what do you get out of it? I don't get

1686
01:25:29,520 --> 01:25:32,880
Speaker 1: it sometimes I'm always so confused and it really frustrates

1687
01:25:32,880 --> 01:25:35,080
Speaker 1: me with men. You know, this morning, I woke up

1688
01:25:35,960 --> 01:25:39,200
Speaker 1: and old Bay is the new nick that I'm talking soon.

1689
01:25:39,520 --> 01:25:41,280
Speaker 1: I was like, Yeah, I'm so excited for today because

1690
01:25:41,560 --> 01:25:44,400
Speaker 1: one of my niggas claims he's transphokeic. I'm like, he ain't,

1691
01:25:44,680 --> 01:25:46,400
Speaker 1: but I know he's gonna be asking some questions that

1692
01:25:46,400 --> 01:25:48,120
Speaker 1: are weird. We got this trans woman that's coming on

1693
01:25:48,200 --> 01:25:51,680
Speaker 1: and it's gonna be fucking lit. And he wanted to

1694
01:25:51,720 --> 01:25:55,040
Speaker 1: see your picture and I knew why, and I was like,

1695
01:25:55,120 --> 01:25:57,040
Speaker 1: my eyes were rolling, and I'm like, do I get

1696
01:25:57,080 --> 01:25:59,920
Speaker 1: angry about it? I want to see her pure? Yeah,

1697
01:26:00,000 --> 01:26:01,800
Speaker 1: because he wanted to determine how much respect he was

1698
01:26:01,840 --> 01:26:04,360
Speaker 1: going to give he I think he no, I think

1699
01:26:04,360 --> 01:26:08,479
Speaker 1: he wanted to know how you would. He was like, oh,

1700
01:26:08,479 --> 01:26:10,400
Speaker 1: because I told him I did hit his live show.

1701
01:26:10,720 --> 01:26:12,680
Speaker 1: I was like, like, straight up Brooklyn athneck and he

1702
01:26:12,760 --> 01:26:16,160
Speaker 1: was like word, He's like, let me see her page.

1703
01:26:16,800 --> 01:26:18,800
Speaker 1: And in his mind I know what he was thinking,

1704
01:26:18,840 --> 01:26:20,960
Speaker 1: like how is this going to go? How soft is

1705
01:26:20,960 --> 01:26:23,000
Speaker 1: he gonna be with her? Like? Those were the things

1706
01:26:23,120 --> 01:26:26,640
Speaker 1: I think. I can't speak for him, but I'm not

1707
01:26:26,760 --> 01:26:30,960
Speaker 1: really all the way and in one corner, but one

1708
01:26:30,960 --> 01:26:32,479
Speaker 1: thing I do and say, I know we have run

1709
01:26:32,479 --> 01:26:35,840
Speaker 1: out of time, right, No, I don't know. Benson doing

1710
01:26:35,880 --> 01:26:37,519
Speaker 1: some work. So as long as he doing work right,

1711
01:26:38,439 --> 01:26:40,640
Speaker 1: if we would say, right a step towards learning for

1712
01:26:40,720 --> 01:26:44,760
Speaker 1: people who are all the way in the corner, all

1713
01:26:44,840 --> 01:26:48,200
Speaker 1: the way in transfor what's one step right now? If

1714
01:26:48,240 --> 01:26:50,679
Speaker 1: you're like, all right, you're worried about people trans people

1715
01:26:50,680 --> 01:26:56,000
Speaker 1: in movies or what's one step right now they can

1716
01:26:56,040 --> 01:26:58,280
Speaker 1: actually self or do for themselves to open their minds

1717
01:26:58,520 --> 01:27:03,680
Speaker 1: or just to consider the possibilities of not being transferred

1718
01:27:03,920 --> 01:27:06,280
Speaker 1: or not understanding that it doesn't have to be this

1719
01:27:06,360 --> 01:27:09,400
Speaker 1: big declaration, right, it could happen, like the start of

1720
01:27:09,439 --> 01:27:11,600
Speaker 1: your journey could be in your house right now on

1721
01:27:11,640 --> 01:27:16,200
Speaker 1: Google right. Taking a second to look at documentaries from

1722
01:27:16,240 --> 01:27:22,080
Speaker 1: trans people by trans people. Uh So, Janet mac is amazing. Um. Actually,

1723
01:27:22,120 --> 01:27:27,679
Speaker 1: my re pressing on Instagram is amazing. Mila jam is amazing. Um.

1724
01:27:27,880 --> 01:27:32,320
Speaker 1: Now when you say, like watching these documentaries, like what

1725
01:27:32,360 --> 01:27:34,320
Speaker 1: do you want people to see? Do you want them

1726
01:27:34,320 --> 01:27:36,080
Speaker 1: to see someone's journey? Do you want them to just

1727
01:27:36,160 --> 01:27:39,360
Speaker 1: the need? What do we need they need? It's about

1728
01:27:39,520 --> 01:27:43,360
Speaker 1: humanizing people who have been dehumanized and hasn't got it right.

1729
01:27:43,680 --> 01:27:46,880
Speaker 1: And so it's about seeing them as sisters, it's about

1730
01:27:46,880 --> 01:27:49,799
Speaker 1: seeing them as wives, It's about seeing them as struggling

1731
01:27:49,880 --> 01:27:52,800
Speaker 1: artists in New York, right, It's about seeing them in

1732
01:27:52,840 --> 01:27:56,720
Speaker 1: their element outside of their gender, because that's always like

1733
01:27:56,760 --> 01:27:58,880
Speaker 1: the thing that we wear. Right. But it's like I'm

1734
01:27:59,040 --> 01:28:01,439
Speaker 1: more than like Hope the trans girl, Like I've written

1735
01:28:01,479 --> 01:28:03,000
Speaker 1: a book, but most people wouldn't even want to talk

1736
01:28:03,000 --> 01:28:05,000
Speaker 1: about that ship because they're still focused on my transmiss

1737
01:28:05,400 --> 01:28:07,719
Speaker 1: I am a manager in a in a world where

1738
01:28:07,760 --> 01:28:10,200
Speaker 1: people say that most trans women have to be escorts,

1739
01:28:10,240 --> 01:28:12,800
Speaker 1: and I'm working. I've worked in corporate America, I do

1740
01:28:12,920 --> 01:28:15,879
Speaker 1: corporate tours. I've taught it at Netflix, for God's sakes,

1741
01:28:15,960 --> 01:28:17,960
Speaker 1: And it's just like it's one of those things where

1742
01:28:17,960 --> 01:28:20,000
Speaker 1: people would never get to that part because they're so

1743
01:28:20,040 --> 01:28:22,559
Speaker 1: busy focused on if they would have sex with me,

1744
01:28:22,640 --> 01:28:25,160
Speaker 1: who is having sex with me, and how we're having sex,

1745
01:28:26,560 --> 01:28:29,240
Speaker 1: And it's just like if you take the time to

1746
01:28:29,280 --> 01:28:32,000
Speaker 1: see that we're living life and we're going on flights

1747
01:28:32,120 --> 01:28:34,960
Speaker 1: and we're getting drunk and making decisions like everybody else.

1748
01:28:35,320 --> 01:28:37,479
Speaker 1: And my thing is like, yo, do you really like

1749
01:28:37,640 --> 01:28:40,880
Speaker 1: what do you want people to do? Like to anybody

1750
01:28:40,920 --> 01:28:43,200
Speaker 1: that hates anybody out there, like, what do you want

1751
01:28:43,240 --> 01:28:48,679
Speaker 1: them to do? Take off? People take off? Like reasons

1752
01:28:48,720 --> 01:28:50,400
Speaker 1: you know maybe when you think about it, like it's

1753
01:28:51,200 --> 01:28:54,360
Speaker 1: always like when you listen to super religious people talking

1754
01:28:54,360 --> 01:28:56,360
Speaker 1: about it, they don't they can't get out of their

1755
01:28:56,360 --> 01:28:58,360
Speaker 1: head like this is for this, is this is for this,

1756
01:28:58,520 --> 01:29:01,960
Speaker 1: Like it's never this, like there's never any profound to

1757
01:29:02,120 --> 01:29:04,760
Speaker 1: have so much hate, and I'm like, okay, so what

1758
01:29:04,840 --> 01:29:07,760
Speaker 1: do you want them to do? Where the gay people

1759
01:29:07,760 --> 01:29:09,720
Speaker 1: they have to just like women, What do you want

1760
01:29:09,760 --> 01:29:12,000
Speaker 1: them to do if they get their transferation? What do

1761
01:29:12,040 --> 01:29:16,200
Speaker 1: you want them to do? You don't like it? So

1762
01:29:16,280 --> 01:29:18,840
Speaker 1: where do they go in your world? How do they

1763
01:29:18,920 --> 01:29:20,880
Speaker 1: That's actually a question I want to ask. They said,

1764
01:29:21,760 --> 01:29:24,759
Speaker 1: how do you feel safe? Where? Where is this safe

1765
01:29:24,960 --> 01:29:26,920
Speaker 1: space for you? When the world is too much? That's

1766
01:29:26,920 --> 01:29:29,880
Speaker 1: what someone asked. I mean, I think a lot of

1767
01:29:30,640 --> 01:29:36,000
Speaker 1: make it. I'm dead if I don't place one of

1768
01:29:36,040 --> 01:29:37,960
Speaker 1: my one of my friends was actually talking to me

1769
01:29:38,000 --> 01:29:40,080
Speaker 1: about that, because I'm very much so when I say

1770
01:29:40,120 --> 01:29:42,959
Speaker 1: there's a difference between being an activist and an advocate

1771
01:29:42,960 --> 01:29:45,599
Speaker 1: ad the kids are just people that are voices and mouthpieces.

1772
01:29:45,600 --> 01:29:48,920
Speaker 1: I'm an activist. So you'll see me on CNN at

1773
01:29:48,920 --> 01:29:51,800
Speaker 1: the front of the riot like I'm down to like

1774
01:29:52,080 --> 01:29:53,640
Speaker 1: I'll put on makeup and I'll take this shot off

1775
01:29:53,640 --> 01:29:55,240
Speaker 1: and put on some times and some sweatpants and i

1776
01:29:55,240 --> 01:29:58,240
Speaker 1: will go and fight with the police. Bitch colors. Let's

1777
01:29:58,400 --> 01:30:04,360
Speaker 1: a like, I'm like, I'm tying it up and I'm

1778
01:30:04,360 --> 01:30:06,720
Speaker 1: whipping your asks about these trans rights, Like I don't

1779
01:30:06,720 --> 01:30:09,120
Speaker 1: have time out here in these streets. But I think

1780
01:30:09,120 --> 01:30:12,760
Speaker 1: that my safe place has been with my friends. It's

1781
01:30:12,760 --> 01:30:15,400
Speaker 1: been with my my mom who has been coming around.

1782
01:30:15,439 --> 01:30:17,280
Speaker 1: It's been It's such a dope thing to hear consider

1783
01:30:19,960 --> 01:30:22,240
Speaker 1: and now your safe space that that's really shows you

1784
01:30:22,320 --> 01:30:24,080
Speaker 1: like there can be growth. I don't want to say

1785
01:30:24,160 --> 01:30:27,080
Speaker 1: change that growth growth. Yeah. One thing I just want

1786
01:30:27,080 --> 01:30:31,759
Speaker 1: to say, um, from my point of view is um,

1787
01:30:31,800 --> 01:30:36,600
Speaker 1: I don't I cannot sit in y'all faces, in anybody's

1788
01:30:36,640 --> 01:30:38,360
Speaker 1: face and say that I'm always going to say the

1789
01:30:38,439 --> 01:30:41,080
Speaker 1: right thing or always gonna understand. But I can't say

1790
01:30:41,080 --> 01:30:42,880
Speaker 1: that I'm working on it and I'm trying, you know

1791
01:30:42,880 --> 01:30:46,639
Speaker 1: what I mean. So obviously you could have a conversation

1792
01:30:46,640 --> 01:30:47,920
Speaker 1: with me and be like you don't get it, and

1793
01:30:47,920 --> 01:30:49,960
Speaker 1: then maybe I'll get it later on. But we need

1794
01:30:50,000 --> 01:30:53,040
Speaker 1: to be able to have that conversation. So we need

1795
01:30:53,120 --> 01:30:56,240
Speaker 1: like people don't be scared to reach out to Hope

1796
01:30:56,640 --> 01:31:01,200
Speaker 1: if you have questions respectfully, because I think that's all

1797
01:31:01,240 --> 01:31:03,479
Speaker 1: about the way. I think a great thing is like

1798
01:31:03,680 --> 01:31:06,639
Speaker 1: people are scared to ask questions, but I think people

1799
01:31:06,720 --> 01:31:10,880
Speaker 1: respect like in their defense because I've seen trans women

1800
01:31:11,320 --> 01:31:13,240
Speaker 1: get defensive, like I love Jane Max, she's one of

1801
01:31:13,240 --> 01:31:15,240
Speaker 1: my mentors, but like on the Breakfast Club and she

1802
01:31:15,320 --> 01:31:17,600
Speaker 1: said I'm sick of doing trans one on one like

1803
01:31:17,680 --> 01:31:20,559
Speaker 1: read my book. I was like, bitch, hold up, that's

1804
01:31:20,560 --> 01:31:22,960
Speaker 1: not that's not the answer. You're gonna forever and always

1805
01:31:22,960 --> 01:31:24,680
Speaker 1: be doing trans one on one because this when you

1806
01:31:24,760 --> 01:31:27,479
Speaker 1: had the chance to to be Stells and be on

1807
01:31:27,600 --> 01:31:29,560
Speaker 1: CNN and live your life and nobody knew when you

1808
01:31:29,600 --> 01:31:32,000
Speaker 1: had your cute little husband and a little dog. You

1809
01:31:32,040 --> 01:31:35,200
Speaker 1: gave that up to be visible. And so now as

1810
01:31:35,240 --> 01:31:37,600
Speaker 1: a visible trans woman, trans one on one is a

1811
01:31:37,640 --> 01:31:44,040
Speaker 1: part of your job. You know what I'm saying. I

1812
01:31:44,080 --> 01:31:45,600
Speaker 1: want to ask a question that I didn't that I

1813
01:31:45,680 --> 01:31:49,080
Speaker 1: think is weird but interesting. We kind of want to

1814
01:31:49,120 --> 01:31:52,120
Speaker 1: know a question when taking like estrogen and ship, what

1815
01:31:52,200 --> 01:31:54,680
Speaker 1: were the first things that you saw, Like what's a

1816
01:31:54,800 --> 01:31:57,000
Speaker 1: change in you five years ago? Was it full? It lives?

1817
01:31:57,080 --> 01:31:59,400
Speaker 1: Is it? Like? What do you think is the biggest

1818
01:31:59,439 --> 01:32:05,080
Speaker 1: difference for transitioning from medicine not just like hair and makeup? Wait? Wait,

1819
01:32:05,680 --> 01:32:10,600
Speaker 1: weight and the way that my skin felt oh um?

1820
01:32:10,640 --> 01:32:14,000
Speaker 1: Because I played sports like my entire life, whether it

1821
01:32:14,040 --> 01:32:16,280
Speaker 1: was running track, football, basketball, like you name it, I

1822
01:32:16,320 --> 01:32:20,240
Speaker 1: played it um and so I was always muscular and

1823
01:32:20,280 --> 01:32:22,640
Speaker 1: super skinny like any given point in my life, I

1824
01:32:22,680 --> 01:32:27,720
Speaker 1: was solid um. But it was always solid, so I

1825
01:32:27,760 --> 01:32:32,000
Speaker 1: never looked like a twig. I was just like muscular um.

1826
01:32:32,080 --> 01:32:34,240
Speaker 1: And So it was one of those things where when

1827
01:32:34,280 --> 01:32:37,280
Speaker 1: I started to take hormones, I noticed that when I

1828
01:32:37,280 --> 01:32:38,840
Speaker 1: was gaining weight like crazy, because there was all these

1829
01:32:38,880 --> 01:32:44,320
Speaker 1: fucking cravings of everything um, and then my skin felt different.

1830
01:32:44,880 --> 01:32:47,599
Speaker 1: It was just like, I don't know, it's just softer

1831
01:32:47,680 --> 01:32:49,479
Speaker 1: and like I know it's men making comments about it

1832
01:32:49,520 --> 01:32:54,000
Speaker 1: like oh you saw like damn you just like it's yeah,

1833
01:32:54,120 --> 01:32:56,000
Speaker 1: Like I don't know, it's just like the skin was

1834
01:32:56,040 --> 01:32:59,000
Speaker 1: the first thing that I saw. Like, now someone asked

1835
01:32:59,040 --> 01:33:03,679
Speaker 1: about your mental sta, did you feel more emotional or anything? Yes, Um,

1836
01:33:03,720 --> 01:33:06,960
Speaker 1: I started crying as stupid shit like I watched this

1837
01:33:07,000 --> 01:33:09,880
Speaker 1: thing movie, which is the fucking like Kid movie. It's

1838
01:33:09,880 --> 01:33:13,599
Speaker 1: a cartoon kid movie about sucking singing animals. And at

1839
01:33:13,640 --> 01:33:15,920
Speaker 1: the end when Tory Kelly saying, like the song that's

1840
01:33:15,960 --> 01:33:19,080
Speaker 1: supposed to be inspirational, I'm boo who fucking crying like

1841
01:33:19,200 --> 01:33:24,640
Speaker 1: I'm like legit, like in my bag just I'm a

1842
01:33:24,760 --> 01:33:31,559
Speaker 1: leo a little girls, you know, almost started crying when

1843
01:33:31,560 --> 01:33:33,120
Speaker 1: she was talking about the bar story, so I had

1844
01:33:33,120 --> 01:33:35,240
Speaker 1: to keep looking above her head just so I wouldn't

1845
01:33:35,280 --> 01:33:40,160
Speaker 1: like black eyes. But mentally like I'm always like it's

1846
01:33:40,200 --> 01:33:43,120
Speaker 1: always I don't know, Like I fight really hard with

1847
01:33:43,160 --> 01:33:45,559
Speaker 1: myself now to not be depressed, because there's a lot

1848
01:33:45,560 --> 01:33:47,240
Speaker 1: of days like I'll wake up and I'm just like

1849
01:33:48,520 --> 01:33:52,760
Speaker 1: just for me, as of late, it's been aesthetics. Like

1850
01:33:52,800 --> 01:33:55,479
Speaker 1: my life is fine, like I'm financially stable, everything is good,

1851
01:33:55,880 --> 01:33:58,280
Speaker 1: but aesthetics has been like my biggest thing is like

1852
01:33:58,640 --> 01:34:01,920
Speaker 1: do I pass this person from like two weeks ago

1853
01:34:02,000 --> 01:34:05,559
Speaker 1: clock me? Like like stupid dumb ship and I wake

1854
01:34:05,680 --> 01:34:09,560
Speaker 1: up just any given morning. How that could become obsessive?

1855
01:34:10,280 --> 01:34:13,120
Speaker 1: You know? Like that do you feel like you're overdoing

1856
01:34:13,160 --> 01:34:17,639
Speaker 1: yourself like makeup, dressing? Like because of that? No, Like

1857
01:34:17,800 --> 01:34:19,640
Speaker 1: even the night that I went lout with Taho, I

1858
01:34:19,640 --> 01:34:21,880
Speaker 1: had just come from work, I was beat the funk down,

1859
01:34:21,960 --> 01:34:23,320
Speaker 1: and I made it a point to take off my

1860
01:34:23,320 --> 01:34:25,800
Speaker 1: makeup before I got on there. How did you even

1861
01:34:25,800 --> 01:34:31,160
Speaker 1: find that? Okay? So I just want people to realize, like, yo,

1862
01:34:31,920 --> 01:34:36,160
Speaker 1: it's crazy, no, just how you affect people. I really

1863
01:34:36,200 --> 01:34:38,160
Speaker 1: be thinking about that a lot, A lot like me

1864
01:34:38,200 --> 01:34:40,360
Speaker 1: and I don't know why I care so much, but

1865
01:34:40,400 --> 01:34:44,200
Speaker 1: I really be thinking about how what people take from

1866
01:34:44,600 --> 01:34:48,320
Speaker 1: um moments with me because I might I'm a very

1867
01:34:48,360 --> 01:34:51,200
Speaker 1: what do you call it? Sensitive and sensitive person, so

1868
01:34:51,320 --> 01:34:52,920
Speaker 1: I could be I could be sensitive about what you

1869
01:34:52,960 --> 01:34:55,599
Speaker 1: do to me and super insensitive to somebody else. What

1870
01:34:55,600 --> 01:34:57,519
Speaker 1: are you thinking about? What affect how you made Hope feel,

1871
01:34:57,560 --> 01:34:59,280
Speaker 1: how she made you feel? I thought about it, and

1872
01:34:59,320 --> 01:35:00,760
Speaker 1: like the next day, I so she followed me, and

1873
01:35:00,760 --> 01:35:02,240
Speaker 1: I didn't wish to follow her, So I was like,

1874
01:35:02,240 --> 01:35:03,640
Speaker 1: you let me follow because I don't want to think

1875
01:35:03,640 --> 01:35:08,760
Speaker 1: that I'm judging on that had I had so much

1876
01:35:08,880 --> 01:35:12,280
Speaker 1: commentary about that, like because after I left you, I

1877
01:35:12,320 --> 01:35:15,160
Speaker 1: went live on my page and we actually had an

1878
01:35:15,200 --> 01:35:18,920
Speaker 1: interesting exchange about it because I was a conspiracy theories

1879
01:35:19,000 --> 01:35:21,599
Speaker 1: at night because the video didn't save, and I remember

1880
01:35:21,600 --> 01:35:24,439
Speaker 1: you saying that the video probably wouldn't save. But my

1881
01:35:24,560 --> 01:35:31,000
Speaker 1: ask that Nigga deleted how did you know that? Because

1882
01:35:31,040 --> 01:35:32,479
Speaker 1: I went back to look Nigga. I was trying to

1883
01:35:32,479 --> 01:35:36,760
Speaker 1: get I was trying to get highlights and ship can

1884
01:35:36,960 --> 01:35:39,360
Speaker 1: be real. I hate being on someone's life, like I

1885
01:35:39,400 --> 01:35:41,360
Speaker 1: don't know how someone stays on mine when I have

1886
01:35:41,400 --> 01:35:43,439
Speaker 1: another screen, because it sounded always that I would have

1887
01:35:43,439 --> 01:35:46,360
Speaker 1: loved to have that. I was so invested. I was

1888
01:35:46,479 --> 01:35:49,000
Speaker 1: mad proud of myself to see like I was like.

1889
01:35:50,240 --> 01:35:52,680
Speaker 1: One interesting thing I took away from that live was

1890
01:35:52,880 --> 01:35:55,960
Speaker 1: you were saying like, yo, let me talk to up,

1891
01:35:56,640 --> 01:35:59,360
Speaker 1: and you were like, you sound so angry, and then

1892
01:35:59,479 --> 01:36:02,479
Speaker 1: you said, I'm only or sounding like this because you

1893
01:36:02,479 --> 01:36:04,640
Speaker 1: can't understand how many times I've had this fucking conversation.

1894
01:36:05,200 --> 01:36:07,439
Speaker 1: And I get it because it's not you. Just like

1895
01:36:07,479 --> 01:36:09,720
Speaker 1: when you said, I know you go through ship. I

1896
01:36:09,760 --> 01:36:11,680
Speaker 1: didn't think you meant it that way either, but she

1897
01:36:11,800 --> 01:36:14,080
Speaker 1: heard it a certain way. It's just like when white

1898
01:36:14,080 --> 01:36:16,000
Speaker 1: people give us a look and we'd be like, bitch.

1899
01:36:16,240 --> 01:36:17,880
Speaker 1: So I can't be in this restaurant and be like, no,

1900
01:36:17,920 --> 01:36:21,680
Speaker 1: you look right. You know, it's like it's hired to

1901
01:36:21,760 --> 01:36:26,839
Speaker 1: fuck hearing it. Um. We didn't go over transvestite and training.

1902
01:36:26,960 --> 01:36:28,840
Speaker 1: And I want to talk about those words, what they mean,

1903
01:36:28,880 --> 01:36:31,320
Speaker 1: where they come from, a deep rooted ship with them now.

1904
01:36:31,320 --> 01:36:34,040
Speaker 1: When I was growing up, my mother and father used

1905
01:36:34,080 --> 01:36:36,000
Speaker 1: to have it out. So I was born in San France.

1906
01:36:36,280 --> 01:36:39,320
Speaker 1: My godmother was a drag queen full On. Um, I'm

1907
01:36:39,400 --> 01:36:41,519
Speaker 1: just my mother is a total hag. Like I grew

1908
01:36:41,600 --> 01:36:44,840
Speaker 1: up with my mom just in it, you know what

1909
01:36:44,880 --> 01:36:47,680
Speaker 1: I'm saying, even still to this day like all of

1910
01:36:47,720 --> 01:36:50,200
Speaker 1: her friends and now it's I am my mother's child.

1911
01:36:50,760 --> 01:36:53,479
Speaker 1: But I remember my dad said to me one day, like,

1912
01:36:54,000 --> 01:36:57,400
Speaker 1: did you know that uncle Judy is a trans met stite?

1913
01:36:57,880 --> 01:37:01,479
Speaker 1: And I was like uncle Judy, I recalled her uncle's

1914
01:37:01,560 --> 01:37:06,519
Speaker 1: Judy and my mom attention, why did he? Why did he?

1915
01:37:07,479 --> 01:37:09,680
Speaker 1: I think he just didn't understand that. I didn't know.

1916
01:37:09,800 --> 01:37:13,120
Speaker 1: I was very but I remember that word. Remember their argument.

1917
01:37:13,240 --> 01:37:15,800
Speaker 1: And my father is a lot older and and it's

1918
01:37:16,000 --> 01:37:18,639
Speaker 1: taking him time. He's way better now, totally great about

1919
01:37:18,640 --> 01:37:21,200
Speaker 1: it now. But I remember my mom talking about that word,

1920
01:37:21,320 --> 01:37:25,000
Speaker 1: and I've never heard that word today and it's trans

1921
01:37:25,040 --> 01:37:27,479
Speaker 1: best I just would we did. Here is the slurest

1922
01:37:27,520 --> 01:37:29,840
Speaker 1: training now yeah, it's just been shortened to training now

1923
01:37:29,840 --> 01:37:31,519
Speaker 1: because I used to think him across just like I

1924
01:37:31,560 --> 01:37:35,560
Speaker 1: didn't get it, Okay, transvesti is the official word or

1925
01:37:36,479 --> 01:37:38,519
Speaker 1: transvestide would be like I guess they would call it

1926
01:37:38,520 --> 01:37:41,160
Speaker 1: the medical term for what like medical people were breaking

1927
01:37:41,200 --> 01:37:44,640
Speaker 1: it down part now, what's trans sexual? Trans sexual is

1928
01:37:44,720 --> 01:37:47,200
Speaker 1: when that's what we like to say. The people who

1929
01:37:47,200 --> 01:37:51,000
Speaker 1: have been posted that right, Okay, so they're not transgendal

1930
01:37:51,600 --> 01:37:54,479
Speaker 1: you have had that makes sense. So you changed your

1931
01:37:54,520 --> 01:37:58,040
Speaker 1: sex gender versus sex as a gender, you are somebody

1932
01:37:58,040 --> 01:38:05,240
Speaker 1: who identifies with that gender. Trans and trying to vest

1933
01:38:05,280 --> 01:38:08,280
Speaker 1: say are derogatory terms created by white folks who oppressed

1934
01:38:08,280 --> 01:38:14,000
Speaker 1: trans people. Transgender is the person who is pre up,

1935
01:38:14,080 --> 01:38:16,759
Speaker 1: has not changed their gender, but identifies with the opposite

1936
01:38:16,760 --> 01:38:18,719
Speaker 1: sex or sex that they were not assigned at birth.

1937
01:38:19,439 --> 01:38:23,040
Speaker 1: Trans Sexual is somebody who has now matched their sex

1938
01:38:23,200 --> 01:38:26,519
Speaker 1: with their gender. Now, we had the last trance and

1939
01:38:26,520 --> 01:38:30,920
Speaker 1: when we had on UM, Jamie Paris said that she no, no, no,

1940
01:38:31,000 --> 01:38:35,559
Speaker 1: they were talking about parties. There's there's a thing on Midtown.

1941
01:38:35,840 --> 01:38:38,920
Speaker 1: They called them training parties, um, and she was saying

1942
01:38:39,000 --> 01:38:41,040
Speaker 1: like it depends how you take the word or something

1943
01:38:41,080 --> 01:38:42,360
Speaker 1: like that. I can't quote with her. I'll try to

1944
01:38:42,400 --> 01:38:44,400
Speaker 1: put the clip in there. I remember, but all I

1945
01:38:44,479 --> 01:38:46,600
Speaker 1: know is she said I gave a little pass on it.

1946
01:38:46,640 --> 01:38:48,639
Speaker 1: And it was awkward for me to listen to because

1947
01:38:49,400 --> 01:38:52,200
Speaker 1: I've been thinking and trying to learn this whole time

1948
01:38:52,360 --> 01:38:54,439
Speaker 1: that training is a bad word. Now when you do

1949
01:38:54,600 --> 01:38:58,439
Speaker 1: see training parties like things like that that that exists,

1950
01:38:58,439 --> 01:39:01,240
Speaker 1: It's in New York. There's t best party training parties

1951
01:39:01,280 --> 01:39:03,280
Speaker 1: things like that, like what do you do? Have you

1952
01:39:03,280 --> 01:39:05,720
Speaker 1: seen trans women letting that word be okay? And how

1953
01:39:05,720 --> 01:39:07,639
Speaker 1: do those conference? I've seen plenty of trans women letting

1954
01:39:07,640 --> 01:39:12,040
Speaker 1: me that be okay. But I've also had to through activism.

1955
01:39:12,080 --> 01:39:15,080
Speaker 1: I've learned, um to not be so judgmental because I

1956
01:39:15,160 --> 01:39:17,000
Speaker 1: come from a place of privilege as a black trans

1957
01:39:17,000 --> 01:39:21,439
Speaker 1: woman who has two degrees right um, and has worked

1958
01:39:21,479 --> 01:39:26,680
Speaker 1: in a multiple array of different places. And so it

1959
01:39:26,840 --> 01:39:29,400
Speaker 1: came off as I was talking down on people. And

1960
01:39:29,439 --> 01:39:31,920
Speaker 1: I've learned just from like different girls that like it's

1961
01:39:31,920 --> 01:39:34,880
Speaker 1: different strucks for different folks because there's different environments. And

1962
01:39:34,920 --> 01:39:36,559
Speaker 1: so I think a lot of the trans women who

1963
01:39:36,560 --> 01:39:38,160
Speaker 1: have come up in the paint and had to live

1964
01:39:38,240 --> 01:39:41,639
Speaker 1: and walk and and make it on the streets, that's

1965
01:39:41,880 --> 01:39:45,040
Speaker 1: those words that they have taken back, right, And so

1966
01:39:45,120 --> 01:39:47,320
Speaker 1: it's like, no, you're not gonna call me a training.

1967
01:39:47,320 --> 01:39:48,760
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go home and cry, I'm not gonna do

1968
01:39:48,760 --> 01:39:51,439
Speaker 1: that anymore. Yeah, I'm a training, So what got it?

1969
01:39:51,800 --> 01:39:54,400
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying? There, they've reclaimed it Now.

1970
01:39:54,400 --> 01:39:56,599
Speaker 1: For me, I'm still not accepting that you're not going

1971
01:39:56,640 --> 01:39:58,080
Speaker 1: to call me a training and think that that's a

1972
01:39:58,080 --> 01:40:00,639
Speaker 1: proper way to address me. That's just not for me.

1973
01:40:01,080 --> 01:40:03,120
Speaker 1: But I'm also not going to tell the next woman

1974
01:40:03,400 --> 01:40:06,640
Speaker 1: that the way that she's empowered herself is wrong. Is

1975
01:40:06,800 --> 01:40:09,479
Speaker 1: t girl a slur? Tea girl known? But I think

1976
01:40:09,479 --> 01:40:11,439
Speaker 1: it's more so of an Asian thing like tea girl,

1977
01:40:11,520 --> 01:40:15,360
Speaker 1: lady boy Like those things are like more so Asian culture.

1978
01:40:15,560 --> 01:40:19,200
Speaker 1: I've seen it. Um, I want to I keep saying

1979
01:40:19,200 --> 01:40:21,400
Speaker 1: the most one of the last question, I don't know

1980
01:40:21,520 --> 01:40:22,840
Speaker 1: if you got any that you can cook up in

1981
01:40:22,880 --> 01:40:24,880
Speaker 1: your head. I did want to ask. Someone said, how

1982
01:40:24,920 --> 01:40:28,400
Speaker 1: do we break the cycle? Of The question says something

1983
01:40:28,400 --> 01:40:31,240
Speaker 1: along the lines of, like trans women promote sex work,

1984
01:40:32,400 --> 01:40:34,360
Speaker 1: how do we break that cycle? Now? I assume it's

1985
01:40:34,400 --> 01:40:36,799
Speaker 1: because they can't get jobs anywhere else, because mother buckers

1986
01:40:36,960 --> 01:40:39,680
Speaker 1: like now, which is why I think sex work is

1987
01:40:39,680 --> 01:40:43,200
Speaker 1: the option. But I am curious to know, like trans

1988
01:40:43,360 --> 01:40:45,880
Speaker 1: like breaking the cycles, it's something that's necessary. How do

1989
01:40:45,880 --> 01:40:47,880
Speaker 1: we keep trans women the safe? My thing is we

1990
01:40:47,920 --> 01:40:49,960
Speaker 1: are the first, the first, first, and foremost before trans

1991
01:40:50,000 --> 01:40:52,240
Speaker 1: people to stop promoting the idea of sex work. We

1992
01:40:52,240 --> 01:40:54,160
Speaker 1: have to make sure that trans people can be employed

1993
01:40:54,479 --> 01:40:56,720
Speaker 1: right at the living at a livable wage. But most

1994
01:40:56,760 --> 01:40:59,040
Speaker 1: people in America can't be avoided livable wage, let alone

1995
01:40:59,080 --> 01:41:02,400
Speaker 1: trans people. Um. But I think that it's also about

1996
01:41:02,439 --> 01:41:08,600
Speaker 1: promoting things from trans people with sucking. Oh girl, Um,

1997
01:41:08,640 --> 01:41:11,439
Speaker 1: it's about the type of people that trans It's about

1998
01:41:12,000 --> 01:41:14,000
Speaker 1: you know, what were you about to say, like, let

1999
01:41:14,000 --> 01:41:17,840
Speaker 1: me tell you she's just slapped her. It's that be

2000
01:41:18,000 --> 01:41:21,439
Speaker 1: so shameless in this woman. You've been in here doing

2001
01:41:21,479 --> 01:41:26,200
Speaker 1: it for a minute and forty seconds. Ba bye bye

2002
01:41:26,240 --> 01:41:32,719
Speaker 1: ba by. But you it's about the type of people.

2003
01:41:33,080 --> 01:41:35,720
Speaker 1: It's about the type of trans people that folks promote. Right,

2004
01:41:36,160 --> 01:41:38,360
Speaker 1: So when we have people like Cookie Cookie, when we

2005
01:41:38,479 --> 01:41:40,680
Speaker 1: had like when t s Madisine was first beginning and

2006
01:41:40,760 --> 01:41:43,400
Speaker 1: she was only talking about like being the big the

2007
01:41:43,520 --> 01:41:46,160
Speaker 1: big black dick training or whatever the case may be.

2008
01:41:46,600 --> 01:41:50,040
Speaker 1: When we have people like my good girlfriend Shawn of Brooks,

2009
01:41:50,080 --> 01:41:54,360
Speaker 1: who is openly advertising her only fans page right, those

2010
01:41:54,439 --> 01:41:59,040
Speaker 1: girls have umpteen thousand million followers. And then a girl

2011
01:41:59,120 --> 01:42:01,880
Speaker 1: like me who was openly trying to tell you guys,

2012
01:42:01,960 --> 01:42:04,360
Speaker 1: how trying to educate you guys like people who are

2013
01:42:04,439 --> 01:42:07,760
Speaker 1: not associated with like the Laverne Coxes of the world,

2014
01:42:07,840 --> 01:42:10,519
Speaker 1: or people who aren't associated to people who are out

2015
01:42:10,600 --> 01:42:13,400
Speaker 1: of the hierarchy. We can't get folks to save by

2016
01:42:13,400 --> 01:42:15,280
Speaker 1: our lives, to listen to our ship until a white

2017
01:42:15,320 --> 01:42:18,720
Speaker 1: person validates our voice. And it's just like, if you

2018
01:42:18,840 --> 01:42:20,920
Speaker 1: want to like, not all trans women are sex workers,

2019
01:42:21,000 --> 01:42:22,479
Speaker 1: but the ones that aren't sex workers don't get no

2020
01:42:22,600 --> 01:42:25,960
Speaker 1: views because y'all don't give a ship. White trans women

2021
01:42:26,000 --> 01:42:29,439
Speaker 1: have you seen them get? Yes, there's so many programs

2022
01:42:29,479 --> 01:42:32,200
Speaker 1: for white trans women to get fucking surgeries, and they

2023
01:42:32,280 --> 01:42:34,519
Speaker 1: have access to all different types of doctors that black

2024
01:42:34,600 --> 01:42:37,800
Speaker 1: women and Latina trans women don't have access to they have.

2025
01:42:38,160 --> 01:42:40,080
Speaker 1: And then you have to remember transitioning as a white

2026
01:42:40,080 --> 01:42:42,360
Speaker 1: woman is completely different from transitioning as a trans woman

2027
01:42:42,600 --> 01:42:45,599
Speaker 1: of color, let alone a black trans woman. White trans

2028
01:42:45,680 --> 01:42:48,040
Speaker 1: women every now and then we hear about issues with

2029
01:42:48,160 --> 01:42:49,880
Speaker 1: them and their family, But then there's always some like

2030
01:42:50,080 --> 01:42:53,640
Speaker 1: Aunt Karen, bitch from next door, like come on and

2031
01:42:54,080 --> 01:42:55,760
Speaker 1: da da da da, and I'll pay for your twenty

2032
01:42:56,120 --> 01:43:01,000
Speaker 1: dollars surgery. G gorgeous transitioned over fucking eight. The bitch

2033
01:43:01,080 --> 01:43:06,320
Speaker 1: was Gregory all of a sudden, like one day, seriously no,

2034
01:43:06,439 --> 01:43:12,519
Speaker 1: but seriously, no, but no, seriously. She was online as

2035
01:43:12,560 --> 01:43:16,200
Speaker 1: Gregory Georgia, Gregory Gorgeous, and then one day came out

2036
01:43:16,200 --> 01:43:18,760
Speaker 1: and was like, oh I'm Gigi now you know, thank

2037
01:43:18,800 --> 01:43:20,479
Speaker 1: you guys so much. I'm going to create a go

2038
01:43:20,640 --> 01:43:22,639
Speaker 1: fund me for you guys to help me with my ship.

2039
01:43:23,200 --> 01:43:27,920
Speaker 1: In less than about a year, bitch was sickening, snatched

2040
01:43:28,120 --> 01:43:35,280
Speaker 1: in a year, boobs, face, lips, eyes, we've hair transplant everything,

2041
01:43:35,520 --> 01:43:42,200
Speaker 1: hair transplant in a year. Yeah, So not to that

2042
01:43:42,280 --> 01:43:44,320
Speaker 1: because I wanted to finish a point on that, but

2043
01:43:44,600 --> 01:43:47,640
Speaker 1: I just realized that I have I have a transgirl

2044
01:43:47,720 --> 01:43:51,080
Speaker 1: file with me, and I see in her pictures she

2045
01:43:51,200 --> 01:43:55,120
Speaker 1: doesn't look happy. So I don't know if that's the

2046
01:43:55,200 --> 01:43:58,160
Speaker 1: depression that you were saying or the stress from just

2047
01:43:58,320 --> 01:44:00,640
Speaker 1: living and you know she does and have trains and

2048
01:44:00,680 --> 01:44:03,599
Speaker 1: her um biomet not saying that she should, but if

2049
01:44:03,640 --> 01:44:05,360
Speaker 1: you would to be able to give a message to

2050
01:44:05,479 --> 01:44:07,439
Speaker 1: those people out there who are living under that type

2051
01:44:07,439 --> 01:44:10,360
Speaker 1: of stress right now, Men that had that are dealing

2052
01:44:10,479 --> 01:44:12,680
Speaker 1: with that, families that have that in there, like, what

2053
01:44:12,760 --> 01:44:15,599
Speaker 1: would you say to them, like to keep them going

2054
01:44:15,680 --> 01:44:17,479
Speaker 1: and waking up the next day, Because I really want

2055
01:44:17,520 --> 01:44:19,400
Speaker 1: to see people past thirty five, like, that's the worst

2056
01:44:19,439 --> 01:44:23,000
Speaker 1: thing I've ever heard. It's important, It's important to validate yourself, right.

2057
01:44:23,439 --> 01:44:25,920
Speaker 1: I think that a lot of trans folks are Our

2058
01:44:26,120 --> 01:44:29,439
Speaker 1: existence is based on the idea of being validated. Does

2059
01:44:29,520 --> 01:44:31,680
Speaker 1: he accept me? Does she accept me? Do they accept me?

2060
01:44:31,760 --> 01:44:34,320
Speaker 1: When my job accept me? And so there's always this

2061
01:44:34,439 --> 01:44:38,080
Speaker 1: question of who else accepts me except me? And so

2062
01:44:39,000 --> 01:44:40,960
Speaker 1: for me, getting out of those funks and getting out

2063
01:44:40,960 --> 01:44:43,240
Speaker 1: of that depression is about making sure that I can

2064
01:44:43,320 --> 01:44:46,680
Speaker 1: validate myself. Like bit girl, you did the damn thing.

2065
01:44:46,800 --> 01:44:49,559
Speaker 1: You got about the hood, You graduated that stuff in team,

2066
01:44:49,960 --> 01:44:52,439
Speaker 1: got your first degree at like twenty, got your second

2067
01:44:52,439 --> 01:44:54,800
Speaker 1: one at like twenty one. But you had your own crab,

2068
01:44:54,920 --> 01:44:56,880
Speaker 1: your own car, you got your dream life, left your

2069
01:44:57,000 --> 01:45:00,599
Speaker 1: dream life, fuck your shut up, rebuild your ship back together,

2070
01:45:00,760 --> 01:45:03,160
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. And now you're here contemplating

2071
01:45:03,200 --> 01:45:05,600
Speaker 1: whether or not like you did the damn thing, and

2072
01:45:05,760 --> 01:45:07,800
Speaker 1: even if that is not your story, right, even if

2073
01:45:07,840 --> 01:45:09,599
Speaker 1: that's not your narrative, Even if you just got off

2074
01:45:09,640 --> 01:45:12,080
Speaker 1: of the piers last night and somebody robbed you from

2075
01:45:12,240 --> 01:45:13,960
Speaker 1: your date money and now you have no way to

2076
01:45:14,000 --> 01:45:16,519
Speaker 1: pay your rent, but you're here and you got dates

2077
01:45:16,600 --> 01:45:18,519
Speaker 1: last night. There's a girl last night that did not

2078
01:45:18,600 --> 01:45:21,720
Speaker 1: get dates. Validate that ship, like the validation from all

2079
01:45:21,760 --> 01:45:23,880
Speaker 1: these other people. And whether or not you pass, or

2080
01:45:24,080 --> 01:45:26,040
Speaker 1: whether or not somebody's gonna like your spouse, or whether

2081
01:45:26,120 --> 01:45:27,760
Speaker 1: or not your homeboys are gonna john on you because

2082
01:45:27,760 --> 01:45:29,800
Speaker 1: you dating this person or you find this person attractive,

2083
01:45:30,120 --> 01:45:32,719
Speaker 1: Like fund them niggas, because them niggas eating rama noodles.

2084
01:45:32,760 --> 01:45:35,040
Speaker 1: You're gonna go take this same trans that they're laughing out,

2085
01:45:35,400 --> 01:45:38,080
Speaker 1: like to the best restaurant out here. Just a lesson

2086
01:45:38,120 --> 01:45:43,320
Speaker 1: of this trans women busy pussy when right whatever, And

2087
01:45:43,479 --> 01:45:45,559
Speaker 1: because that that's the thing, especially like to my men.

2088
01:45:45,680 --> 01:45:47,920
Speaker 1: I think that it's always crazy because I always see

2089
01:45:48,439 --> 01:45:51,360
Speaker 1: like men who are attracted or open minded to certain things.

2090
01:45:51,840 --> 01:45:54,200
Speaker 1: Y'all niggas are the ones like with money doing ship

2091
01:45:54,560 --> 01:45:56,599
Speaker 1: and then y'all trying to impress niggas that ain't got

2092
01:45:56,640 --> 01:46:01,200
Speaker 1: ship on the black doing nothing. Is it, trans trans woman?

2093
01:46:01,360 --> 01:46:03,120
Speaker 1: Is it easy of being a transman? It is to

2094
01:46:03,200 --> 01:46:06,000
Speaker 1: be a trans of course, and and they hate to

2095
01:46:06,080 --> 01:46:08,000
Speaker 1: admit it, but but it is. And it's just because

2096
01:46:08,080 --> 01:46:09,920
Speaker 1: most trans men, if you don't pass, you're seen as

2097
01:46:09,920 --> 01:46:11,639
Speaker 1: a lesbian that it really gives a shit about lesbian

2098
01:46:11,680 --> 01:46:14,599
Speaker 1: is and if you if you passed as a man,

2099
01:46:14,760 --> 01:46:18,160
Speaker 1: you just passed. And so there's not a lot of

2100
01:46:18,400 --> 01:46:21,439
Speaker 1: issues socially. Now I will say that transmants don't have

2101
01:46:22,040 --> 01:46:25,680
Speaker 1: the health care issues. There's still issues around pregnancy and

2102
01:46:26,320 --> 01:46:31,240
Speaker 1: you know, reform for trans men, right, what's reform like?

2103
01:46:31,400 --> 01:46:33,840
Speaker 1: So health care reform. So the way that we're talking

2104
01:46:33,880 --> 01:46:37,200
Speaker 1: about pregnancy as if it's just a women's issue, when

2105
01:46:37,280 --> 01:46:40,400
Speaker 1: now it is indeed a man's issue as well, because

2106
01:46:40,439 --> 01:46:42,800
Speaker 1: there are trans meant that are getting pregnant. But when

2107
01:46:42,920 --> 01:46:46,799
Speaker 1: a man comes into the yard and says, hey, I'm pregnant,

2108
01:46:47,439 --> 01:46:53,960
Speaker 1: they're like, no, I'm serious. Um, so you think nigga

2109
01:46:54,400 --> 01:46:59,600
Speaker 1: like us said fix me right. Yeah, we had a

2110
01:46:59,640 --> 01:47:01,800
Speaker 1: trans in out here. I run shout out to Rush

2111
01:47:01,920 --> 01:47:06,360
Speaker 1: London from b K Chat that nigga looked, boy, I'm

2112
01:47:06,760 --> 01:47:09,800
Speaker 1: gonna be real most I haven't seen any black trans men,

2113
01:47:09,920 --> 01:47:12,680
Speaker 1: just like a lot of white but like, fuck, you

2114
01:47:13,000 --> 01:47:15,360
Speaker 1: just had it and it was funish and he had

2115
01:47:15,400 --> 01:47:18,000
Speaker 1: a British accent and all I could think to myself

2116
01:47:18,160 --> 01:47:20,599
Speaker 1: was like, I don't give a but what he got

2117
01:47:20,640 --> 01:47:22,439
Speaker 1: going on because everybody's like, do he how do you

2118
01:47:22,439 --> 01:47:24,800
Speaker 1: get a dick? Did it? I was like, who cares?

2119
01:47:25,200 --> 01:47:26,960
Speaker 1: Then he looks so good, I'll make it work. I

2120
01:47:27,040 --> 01:47:30,240
Speaker 1: feel like women are more accepting, like just going something

2121
01:47:30,360 --> 01:47:34,479
Speaker 1: like that because it's it's just more pressure because women

2122
01:47:34,520 --> 01:47:37,880
Speaker 1: aren't judged for for not in that way. Women are

2123
01:47:37,920 --> 01:47:43,920
Speaker 1: judged everything but sexual right Sexually, women are not. We're

2124
01:47:44,960 --> 01:47:47,640
Speaker 1: essential essential. It's like, oh, that's sex. This was so

2125
01:47:48,720 --> 01:47:53,599
Speaker 1: enlightening for me because you know, I wanna be an

2126
01:47:53,640 --> 01:47:55,519
Speaker 1: ally and make sure I'm saying the right things. But

2127
01:47:55,600 --> 01:47:57,320
Speaker 1: I learned a lot. You couldn't tell me the game

2128
01:47:57,320 --> 01:48:02,360
Speaker 1: and he didn't make makeup every palette I got. It

2129
01:48:02,439 --> 01:48:05,240
Speaker 1: was the nigga behind it, like nah this yeah, we

2130
01:48:05,320 --> 01:48:09,280
Speaker 1: name it and honey, love the fuck that's my favorite lipstick. Honestly,

2131
01:48:09,640 --> 01:48:11,759
Speaker 1: I think a lot of people needed this too, because

2132
01:48:11,760 --> 01:48:14,639
Speaker 1: I think we covered questions that were uncomfortable to ask

2133
01:48:15,080 --> 01:48:17,519
Speaker 1: and not so fun, you know what I mean. And

2134
01:48:17,640 --> 01:48:20,320
Speaker 1: I think like you want to hear the things like oh,

2135
01:48:20,400 --> 01:48:22,160
Speaker 1: tell us about the NIA was on the DL and

2136
01:48:22,240 --> 01:48:24,880
Speaker 1: did it up? But it ain't really the conversation is

2137
01:48:24,960 --> 01:48:28,400
Speaker 1: needed more than That's more the novelty like tell us

2138
01:48:28,479 --> 01:48:30,800
Speaker 1: the fucking tea more than like teach us. That's why

2139
01:48:30,840 --> 01:48:32,400
Speaker 1: I was excited with like, you hit me up because

2140
01:48:32,400 --> 01:48:36,200
Speaker 1: I knew that you wanted to have a conversation that

2141
01:48:36,320 --> 01:48:38,559
Speaker 1: was going to be different. I did because I usually

2142
01:48:38,560 --> 01:48:40,360
Speaker 1: have the force people I have this conversation. I knew

2143
01:48:40,400 --> 01:48:42,240
Speaker 1: that you wanted like it was your intention to have

2144
01:48:42,400 --> 01:48:44,960
Speaker 1: this conversation. Were so my intention because I think there's

2145
01:48:45,000 --> 01:48:48,280
Speaker 1: a very glamorous thing that can happen when you want

2146
01:48:48,280 --> 01:48:50,600
Speaker 1: to have a trans want on highlight how awesome she

2147
01:48:50,840 --> 01:48:53,400
Speaker 1: is and that she's the same, but I wanted to

2148
01:48:53,479 --> 01:48:56,320
Speaker 1: talk about exactly why she's different and how it's different

2149
01:48:56,400 --> 01:48:58,840
Speaker 1: from what we do every day, how it's different from

2150
01:48:58,880 --> 01:49:02,719
Speaker 1: me being Light's intermixed, difference from you being assists head

2151
01:49:03,720 --> 01:49:06,439
Speaker 1: black man. We are black in the day, but everybody's

2152
01:49:06,439 --> 01:49:08,519
Speaker 1: walking a different paths here. But like, no, I mean,

2153
01:49:08,560 --> 01:49:09,800
Speaker 1: it's great, and I can't wait to hear you on

2154
01:49:09,880 --> 01:49:13,680
Speaker 1: So Shameless too. It's definitely gonna invite it. It's So

2155
01:49:13,760 --> 01:49:15,960
Speaker 1: Shameless podcast. I'm trying to think what angle are you

2156
01:49:16,000 --> 01:49:20,080
Speaker 1: about to take? I'm not sure because I gotta listen back.

2157
01:49:23,040 --> 01:49:25,680
Speaker 1: Nah nah see, I'm well, I'm definitely about respect I

2158
01:49:25,680 --> 01:49:27,599
Speaker 1: don't like bringing people on my show to disrespect them.

2159
01:49:28,600 --> 01:49:30,240
Speaker 1: That was the only reason I felt bad about having

2160
01:49:30,280 --> 01:49:33,679
Speaker 1: that girl back, going here, Oh you're gonna I wasn't

2161
01:49:33,680 --> 01:49:36,360
Speaker 1: gonna be disrespectful. But I know that I knew that

2162
01:49:36,400 --> 01:49:42,720
Speaker 1: I would dance around. I don't know. I feel like

2163
01:49:42,720 --> 01:49:44,800
Speaker 1: it would have been difficult for her to dance around

2164
01:49:44,800 --> 01:49:47,040
Speaker 1: a lot of the questions I would have. I just can't.

2165
01:49:47,240 --> 01:49:49,360
Speaker 1: It's really hard for me when black women start that ship.

2166
01:49:49,439 --> 01:49:52,160
Speaker 1: But see, that's the thing. You got to have educational moments,

2167
01:49:52,240 --> 01:49:54,040
Speaker 1: and and that's where we are, and the fact that

2168
01:49:54,080 --> 01:49:56,960
Speaker 1: we have our platforms, and I think the people were

2169
01:49:57,000 --> 01:49:59,920
Speaker 1: really intelligent. You know a lot of times ignorance people

2170
01:50:00,120 --> 01:50:03,639
Speaker 1: hide behind it. Right, He'll take like a fucking white

2171
01:50:03,640 --> 01:50:06,080
Speaker 1: supremacist and can break it down. But I don't feel

2172
01:50:06,200 --> 01:50:09,280
Speaker 1: like I'm that suave enough to sit in front of

2173
01:50:09,360 --> 01:50:12,040
Speaker 1: somebody that I know is transphobic, in front of a

2174
01:50:12,120 --> 01:50:15,040
Speaker 1: trans woman, like I don't think I could do it,

2175
01:50:15,520 --> 01:50:18,559
Speaker 1: because immediately I was gonna say I was gonna, let's

2176
01:50:18,600 --> 01:50:20,920
Speaker 1: be very clear, you think she would. People are real

2177
01:50:21,040 --> 01:50:23,120
Speaker 1: easy at being keyboard gangsters when a person is not

2178
01:50:23,200 --> 01:50:25,320
Speaker 1: in their face. But I've never run into Like even

2179
01:50:25,400 --> 01:50:28,600
Speaker 1: some of the hardest niggas, like they'll say whatever they

2180
01:50:28,680 --> 01:50:31,280
Speaker 1: want to say online, but they'll see that same old

2181
01:50:31,320 --> 01:50:33,760
Speaker 1: game board Day was talking too and be like, man,

2182
01:50:33,920 --> 01:50:36,000
Speaker 1: I going somewhere with that, Like you know, but it's

2183
01:50:36,080 --> 01:50:38,720
Speaker 1: never the same, It's never the same energy. Now. The Internet, really,

2184
01:50:39,479 --> 01:50:42,240
Speaker 1: the Internet emboldens people to feel because they don't feel

2185
01:50:42,240 --> 01:50:44,000
Speaker 1: like like, oh she and d C, I'm never going

2186
01:50:44,040 --> 01:50:45,479
Speaker 1: to meet this. All I do when people talk to

2187
01:50:45,720 --> 01:50:47,919
Speaker 1: me aline is like when I'm alive, it's like requests

2188
01:50:47,920 --> 01:50:50,240
Speaker 1: to go alive with them, and then when they answered,

2189
01:50:50,240 --> 01:50:57,320
Speaker 1: they be like, yo eezy wild you know you're not

2190
01:50:57,439 --> 01:51:03,000
Speaker 1: you're cute. Um, so I want us to all drop

2191
01:51:03,120 --> 01:51:06,000
Speaker 1: our ship. Um, I want to tell you guys something.

2192
01:51:06,760 --> 01:51:09,320
Speaker 1: So I've been working on this new podcast I've told

2193
01:51:09,360 --> 01:51:11,320
Speaker 1: some of you guys. It's called I'm ducked Up. It's

2194
01:51:11,320 --> 01:51:14,600
Speaker 1: just the season, And it started from me getting so

2195
01:51:14,760 --> 01:51:16,599
Speaker 1: fucked up on i G Live and telling these dumbass

2196
01:51:16,720 --> 01:51:19,120
Speaker 1: drunk as stories. Right, So I'm like, Okay, I want

2197
01:51:19,160 --> 01:51:21,200
Speaker 1: to do something alone with nobody in the room whatever.

2198
01:51:21,600 --> 01:51:24,080
Speaker 1: So I recorded all this content and they got'm fucked up,

2199
01:51:24,240 --> 01:51:29,479
Speaker 1: Like fu up story. It's really bad. But um, I

2200
01:51:29,600 --> 01:51:33,439
Speaker 1: ended up all the shift content I had got sucked up,

2201
01:51:33,479 --> 01:51:36,160
Speaker 1: don't want to talk about it. So I'm redoing the stories.

2202
01:51:36,200 --> 01:51:38,280
Speaker 1: And now each episode I'm doing is gonna be based

2203
01:51:38,320 --> 01:51:40,759
Speaker 1: on one thing. For example, it could be the category,

2204
01:51:40,800 --> 01:51:44,840
Speaker 1: could be ship, it could be gay, it could be um,

2205
01:51:45,040 --> 01:51:48,240
Speaker 1: I don't know a time that you cried. And basically

2206
01:51:48,320 --> 01:51:51,519
Speaker 1: one story is me alone and the others be featuring somebody.

2207
01:51:51,920 --> 01:51:54,040
Speaker 1: So if you have a story that you would like

2208
01:51:54,120 --> 01:51:56,720
Speaker 1: to share with me, and you live in New York

2209
01:51:56,920 --> 01:51:59,880
Speaker 1: or somewhere, I could take a train to not Feeling Never,

2210
01:52:00,000 --> 01:52:02,840
Speaker 1: I mean a train like in New York, I want

2211
01:52:02,880 --> 01:52:05,720
Speaker 1: to come and um, yeah I get your side of

2212
01:52:05,760 --> 01:52:07,720
Speaker 1: the story. I barely talk. I just want you to

2213
01:52:08,120 --> 01:52:10,200
Speaker 1: let it all out. But um, it's been really fun

2214
01:52:11,120 --> 01:52:13,280
Speaker 1: and I need some more content for it. So yeah,

2215
01:52:13,760 --> 01:52:15,320
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you. Do you know how hard it

2216
01:52:15,479 --> 01:52:18,160
Speaker 1: is to like be drunk and also have to record

2217
01:52:18,200 --> 01:52:20,240
Speaker 1: yourself because I can't come to a studio, you know

2218
01:52:20,280 --> 01:52:22,320
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So I just get funked up in

2219
01:52:22,400 --> 01:52:25,040
Speaker 1: my house. Think I'm recording go on for thirty minutes.

2220
01:52:25,040 --> 01:52:27,960
Speaker 1: I'll be like, wow, that shouldn't even on. Ain't no

2221
01:52:28,040 --> 01:52:33,120
Speaker 1: red light is terrible and people be like, yo, where

2222
01:52:33,280 --> 01:52:34,840
Speaker 1: is it? And I'd be like, dog, I thought I

2223
01:52:34,920 --> 01:52:39,600
Speaker 1: had content, But it's just like a lot of production

2224
01:52:39,720 --> 01:52:41,639
Speaker 1: because you have to weed out, like there's sometimes when

2225
01:52:41,680 --> 01:52:43,240
Speaker 1: you can't tell what I'm saying, so I had to

2226
01:52:43,280 --> 01:52:45,479
Speaker 1: input my own voice, like oh the word that I said,

2227
01:52:46,880 --> 01:52:48,920
Speaker 1: that's how up I sounded. So it's just a lot

2228
01:52:49,040 --> 01:52:51,719
Speaker 1: of um work. So yes, if you guys have a story,

2229
01:52:51,840 --> 01:52:54,320
Speaker 1: write me the Wheezy w t F at gmail dot

2230
01:52:54,360 --> 01:52:57,280
Speaker 1: com for your home mail. There is none today because

2231
01:52:57,280 --> 01:52:59,680
Speaker 1: all y'all sending questions and those two horrible decisions at

2232
01:52:59,720 --> 01:53:02,280
Speaker 1: GM dot com. Let's start with Taho. Where can they

2233
01:53:02,320 --> 01:53:03,960
Speaker 1: find you? And what stuff do you have coming up?

2234
01:53:04,120 --> 01:53:06,280
Speaker 1: And you just did your live show. Oh yeah, my

2235
01:53:06,600 --> 01:53:10,320
Speaker 1: my name is Taho Underscore TV on all platforms. Um

2236
01:53:11,120 --> 01:53:14,400
Speaker 1: I have this so shameless podcast with miss dager Bell

2237
01:53:14,840 --> 01:53:18,960
Speaker 1: bisexual woman and uh my my my other friend DJ

2238
01:53:19,120 --> 01:53:22,080
Speaker 1: Trauma NYC. And we just talk a bisexual mom. I

2239
01:53:22,160 --> 01:53:24,120
Speaker 1: feel like that's important. I like that you have a

2240
01:53:24,200 --> 01:53:28,120
Speaker 1: mom on she reads me to filth every week. You know,

2241
01:53:28,320 --> 01:53:32,360
Speaker 1: we we have really interested in uh conversations from a

2242
01:53:32,439 --> 01:53:35,200
Speaker 1: friend point of view that aren't scared to argue and

2243
01:53:35,280 --> 01:53:37,320
Speaker 1: get down to the nitty greedy about some real ship.

2244
01:53:37,920 --> 01:53:41,479
Speaker 1: And so, you know, it's one of those podcasts where

2245
01:53:41,479 --> 01:53:44,840
Speaker 1: you're you're on one person's side and you're yelling at them,

2246
01:53:45,080 --> 01:53:46,920
Speaker 1: and the other person has a bunch of other people,

2247
01:53:46,960 --> 01:53:49,360
Speaker 1: maybe people in your family and the other person's side,

2248
01:53:49,360 --> 01:53:51,439
Speaker 1: and they're yelling at you. And you know, I will

2249
01:53:51,479 --> 01:53:54,280
Speaker 1: say this, your podcast gets me in my feelings, not

2250
01:53:54,400 --> 01:53:56,559
Speaker 1: like emotionally, but like sometimes i'll listen to it, I'll

2251
01:53:56,560 --> 01:53:59,080
Speaker 1: be annoyed and sometimes but I like things like that.

2252
01:53:59,640 --> 01:54:02,000
Speaker 1: When you fel something this controversial. It's one of those

2253
01:54:02,000 --> 01:54:03,240
Speaker 1: things where you go to work and be like, what

2254
01:54:03,320 --> 01:54:08,720
Speaker 1: do you think about this? I'm the seeker. I'd be like, right, right, No,

2255
01:54:09,320 --> 01:54:11,360
Speaker 1: I know you'll be doing us to us. And you know,

2256
01:54:11,439 --> 01:54:13,519
Speaker 1: that's why it's called so shameless, because we do what

2257
01:54:13,640 --> 01:54:16,120
Speaker 1: most people are scared to do in today's society, save

2258
01:54:16,200 --> 01:54:19,120
Speaker 1: what's on people's minds. You know, people, everybody's like kind

2259
01:54:19,160 --> 01:54:21,920
Speaker 1: of programmed, and I don't really believe that it's all real, because,

2260
01:54:22,320 --> 01:54:24,080
Speaker 1: like I said, you'll act one way in front of

2261
01:54:24,120 --> 01:54:26,799
Speaker 1: people and then behind closed doors be a whole completely

2262
01:54:26,840 --> 01:54:31,800
Speaker 1: different way or be um um influenced in a whole

2263
01:54:31,840 --> 01:54:34,600
Speaker 1: different way than what's real. I just I just we

2264
01:54:34,760 --> 01:54:38,320
Speaker 1: like keeping it fucking funky. I so shameless, and we

2265
01:54:38,440 --> 01:54:41,880
Speaker 1: hope to have hope on the show, Dods begging me

2266
01:54:42,000 --> 01:54:45,360
Speaker 1: to be here today, and I really wish she wanted

2267
01:54:45,360 --> 01:54:46,640
Speaker 1: to be. She wanted to hope to be with us

2268
01:54:47,680 --> 01:54:52,000
Speaker 1: because we're supposed to be called today. We don't by Dodge,

2269
01:54:52,040 --> 01:54:55,800
Speaker 1: can't wait to hug you, talk to you. It's just hope.

2270
01:54:55,800 --> 01:54:58,440
Speaker 1: It's so inspiring, you know. I think it's just because

2271
01:54:58,520 --> 01:55:01,920
Speaker 1: like you say everything that we really want you to

2272
01:55:01,960 --> 01:55:05,520
Speaker 1: say without, in my opinion, being defensive. Like I think

2273
01:55:05,560 --> 01:55:08,840
Speaker 1: that I've seen some trans women be annoyed when to dude,

2274
01:55:08,880 --> 01:55:09,960
Speaker 1: just like I don't know if I could be to

2275
01:55:09,960 --> 01:55:13,160
Speaker 1: trans women like well why not? It was like that,

2276
01:55:13,160 --> 01:55:14,720
Speaker 1: I don't want to why it's not for me. I'm

2277
01:55:14,800 --> 01:55:16,760
Speaker 1: so glad we had this conversation me too. Where can

2278
01:55:16,800 --> 01:55:18,800
Speaker 1: they find you, Hope? I know you got a book. Um,

2279
01:55:19,000 --> 01:55:21,640
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put that information in the description, but like, yeah,

2280
01:55:21,680 --> 01:55:23,360
Speaker 1: tell people where they can find you when you have

2281
01:55:23,520 --> 01:55:27,000
Speaker 1: upcoming and like it is hope disguised for those of you.

2282
01:55:27,200 --> 01:55:29,280
Speaker 1: I don't how to spell disguise D I S g

2283
01:55:29,480 --> 01:55:32,600
Speaker 1: U I S E D hope disguise all one word

2284
01:55:33,440 --> 01:55:36,000
Speaker 1: on every single social media platform that you could possibly think.

2285
01:55:36,000 --> 01:55:39,000
Speaker 1: I try to keep it easy. Hope this Hope gisele

2286
01:55:39,160 --> 01:55:42,560
Speaker 1: dot com for people who don't g I S E

2287
01:55:42,920 --> 01:55:45,440
Speaker 1: l l E. We're gonna put that like when you're

2288
01:55:45,480 --> 01:55:47,480
Speaker 1: listening to the episode, you can always, like I think,

2289
01:55:47,840 --> 01:55:49,920
Speaker 1: swipe up on it and it will show the info

2290
01:55:50,000 --> 01:55:51,800
Speaker 1: and those things will be in there. Boom, so all

2291
01:55:51,880 --> 01:55:55,280
Speaker 1: of that, and then the book is available on Amazon, Eyebooks,

2292
01:55:55,720 --> 01:55:59,640
Speaker 1: my website, UM, certain Barns and Nobles, because I think

2293
01:55:59,680 --> 01:56:01,960
Speaker 1: most of them have sold out of it. Um. But

2294
01:56:02,040 --> 01:56:05,080
Speaker 1: the book is called Becoming Hope Removing the Disguise. You

2295
01:56:05,120 --> 01:56:08,040
Speaker 1: see that flex I can't mean since it's so sold out.

2296
01:56:09,960 --> 01:56:11,960
Speaker 1: And I think the latest thing that I have coming

2297
01:56:12,040 --> 01:56:15,160
Speaker 1: up I will be on the Own Network September seventh.

2298
01:56:17,720 --> 01:56:19,480
Speaker 1: It is just it's like a it's a little clip.

2299
01:56:19,520 --> 01:56:22,200
Speaker 1: They're just using a clip. UM on the own network.

2300
01:56:22,240 --> 01:56:26,280
Speaker 1: They're having uh this new series called Black Women Owned

2301
01:56:26,320 --> 01:56:29,600
Speaker 1: the Conversation. UM. My episode is episode three. It's the

2302
01:56:29,760 --> 01:56:32,320
Speaker 1: LGBT episode featuring Angelica Ross and a couple of other

2303
01:56:32,480 --> 01:56:35,280
Speaker 1: like inspiring women. Um, but I will be on that

2304
01:56:35,360 --> 01:56:37,720
Speaker 1: episode that no More. By the way, so I just

2305
01:56:37,760 --> 01:56:44,360
Speaker 1: said op nigga, it's just a no, it's opra. But yeah,

2306
01:56:44,480 --> 01:56:46,600
Speaker 1: so that's like the closest thing that I have coming up.

2307
01:56:46,640 --> 01:56:50,000
Speaker 1: And apparently they're so stame this podcast. Yeah, I think

2308
01:56:50,000 --> 01:56:51,760
Speaker 1: you need a link with all podcasters. I'm sure we

2309
01:56:51,840 --> 01:56:54,280
Speaker 1: all feel inspired. I would love for you to get

2310
01:56:54,280 --> 01:56:58,160
Speaker 1: in the room and read some dumb niggas. I really would, seriously,

2311
01:56:58,360 --> 01:57:00,680
Speaker 1: Like I really, we're going to have some conversation. I

2312
01:57:00,760 --> 01:57:03,920
Speaker 1: know a lot of my my listeners they're dealing with

2313
01:57:04,200 --> 01:57:06,120
Speaker 1: their own true so they're gonna hit me up, like yo,

2314
01:57:07,720 --> 01:57:10,720
Speaker 1: I'm gonny to have those conversations. And it's crazy because

2315
01:57:10,800 --> 01:57:12,600
Speaker 1: I'm the one saying this and they know me from

2316
01:57:12,680 --> 01:57:15,200
Speaker 1: Nord so they're like, yo, yo, what's up with you?

2317
01:57:16,000 --> 01:57:17,760
Speaker 1: And I'm kind of on something like yo, bro, Like

2318
01:57:18,120 --> 01:57:19,640
Speaker 1: like I said, what do you want them to do?

2319
01:57:21,080 --> 01:57:23,040
Speaker 1: And why does it make you so mad? I know

2320
01:57:23,920 --> 01:57:25,840
Speaker 1: I think that, Like that's a bad Like that's a

2321
01:57:25,960 --> 01:57:29,680
Speaker 1: valid ask question. Really, why doesn't make you so mad?

2322
01:57:29,760 --> 01:57:32,360
Speaker 1: What the next person is doing? You want them to? Like,

2323
01:57:33,120 --> 01:57:35,320
Speaker 1: we're here, this is where we live at and I'd

2324
01:57:35,400 --> 01:57:38,720
Speaker 1: much rather educate my friends. My children got kids. I

2325
01:57:38,760 --> 01:57:40,960
Speaker 1: don't want my kids going up hateful. You know, I

2326
01:57:41,000 --> 01:57:42,480
Speaker 1: don't want to be the new white man. I don't

2327
01:57:42,480 --> 01:57:46,120
Speaker 1: want to be the new race. One of the most

2328
01:57:46,160 --> 01:57:47,960
Speaker 1: important things you said today. That's right, you have two

2329
01:57:48,000 --> 01:57:53,960
Speaker 1: three kids? You have three or four? Boy? Let's move on? Yeah,

2330
01:57:54,160 --> 01:57:58,280
Speaker 1: what do you mean? We're about to go? But like,

2331
01:57:58,360 --> 01:58:00,800
Speaker 1: for real, you got three or for are you have

2332
01:58:00,880 --> 01:58:02,520
Speaker 1: a test underway or you just don't know if you

2333
01:58:02,560 --> 01:58:06,840
Speaker 1: have before? You know? I think, oh my god, this

2334
01:58:06,920 --> 01:58:12,840
Speaker 1: is what episode. I'd like the number? Thank you, me too,

2335
01:58:13,360 --> 01:58:17,640
Speaker 1: but three or four? All right, y'all. Check out this

2336
01:58:17,680 --> 01:58:19,880
Speaker 1: Patreon clip me and man, you're gonna be in and

2337
01:58:19,960 --> 01:58:32,120
Speaker 1: I guess uh but bye. Kevin So, Kevin Um is

2338
01:58:32,240 --> 01:58:35,920
Speaker 1: battling with his sexuality and although he has never been

2339
01:58:36,000 --> 01:58:41,240
Speaker 1: with a man, Kevin Um decides to come forward to chair.

2340
01:58:42,560 --> 01:58:47,760
Speaker 1: So he's on grinder, so you see him become really

2341
01:58:47,920 --> 01:58:50,680
Speaker 1: enthralled into his phone and he's swiping a lot, but

2342
01:58:50,840 --> 01:58:53,640
Speaker 1: on these gay mail apps, so he has not yet

2343
01:58:53,760 --> 01:58:58,200
Speaker 1: acted on penis. But he's like like, is this what

2344
01:58:58,320 --> 01:59:00,720
Speaker 1: I want? Is it not what I want? You see

2345
01:59:00,800 --> 01:59:03,360
Speaker 1: him kind of have these different interactions with men that

2346
01:59:03,520 --> 01:59:06,640
Speaker 1: come onto the scene in different um cases as well.

2347
01:59:07,520 --> 01:59:11,600
Speaker 1: And so finally he comes forward to Charity while she's pregnant,

2348
01:59:12,440 --> 01:59:16,240
Speaker 1: m ad. She's about to hop hop she she maybe

2349
01:59:16,760 --> 01:59:18,880
Speaker 1: how she got pregnant though he seems so and I

2350
01:59:19,000 --> 01:59:21,400
Speaker 1: feel like you in the beginning was in season one

2351
01:59:21,560 --> 01:59:23,400
Speaker 1: when he like they're having sex and then he like

2352
01:59:23,800 --> 01:59:29,240
Speaker 1: rolls over and he's like back on. That's so they're

2353
01:59:29,320 --> 01:59:32,440
Speaker 1: trying to have a baby. They're having sex. But as

2354
01:59:32,480 --> 01:59:34,480
Speaker 1: soon as they're done having sex, he does he rolls

2355
01:59:34,520 --> 01:59:38,280
Speaker 1: over and gets back on this grinder act to swipe men.

2356
01:59:39,080 --> 01:59:43,560
Speaker 1: So she thinks he's She thinks he's cheating because she's like,

2357
01:59:43,680 --> 01:59:47,600
Speaker 1: you've been in your phone? Is it? Give me your phone?

2358
01:59:48,040 --> 01:59:49,960
Speaker 1: Which again, this could this is a lot of things

2359
01:59:50,000 --> 01:59:51,720
Speaker 1: that happened in a lot of couples. You see your

2360
01:59:51,760 --> 01:59:54,280
Speaker 1: man change pattern and he's in his phone. Now, nigga,

2361
01:59:54,280 --> 01:59:56,440
Speaker 1: who you want to file with exactly because normally I'll

2362
01:59:56,440 --> 01:59:58,280
Speaker 1: be putting your ask to sleep. So what you're doing now?

2363
02:00:00,040 --> 02:00:02,400
Speaker 1: She didn't know that he was swiping, so basically right,

2364
02:00:02,760 --> 02:00:04,680
Speaker 1: she had to be what seven eight months right before

2365
02:00:05,120 --> 02:00:11,280
Speaker 1: water breaking with twins, Kevin comes to charity, and it's like,

2366
02:00:12,360 --> 02:00:15,120
Speaker 1: I just I don't know what's wrong with me, but

2367
02:00:15,840 --> 02:00:19,280
Speaker 1: I have feelings for men. He didn't say he was

2368
02:00:19,360 --> 02:00:23,360
Speaker 1: having sex with men. He just knew that he was

2369
02:00:23,440 --> 02:00:31,360
Speaker 1: having some sort of weird curiosity sexual arousal from men.

2370
02:00:32,200 --> 02:00:35,440
Speaker 1: UM and so although he does not act on this immediately,

2371
02:00:36,280 --> 02:00:40,200
Speaker 1: she kind of doesn't know how to react. So before

2372
02:00:40,280 --> 02:00:44,040
Speaker 1: we dig into this UM, as you guys know, this

2373
02:00:44,200 --> 02:00:46,880
Speaker 1: is something that I've talked about on the podcast quite

2374
02:00:46,920 --> 02:00:49,600
Speaker 1: a lot. UM. I feel like that I am a

2375
02:00:49,680 --> 02:00:52,840
Speaker 1: woman who would be open to dating a man who

2376
02:00:53,040 --> 02:00:56,800
Speaker 1: was either experimenting, curious, has dealt with other men in

2377
02:00:56,880 --> 02:01:00,000
Speaker 1: the past, or has dealt with or curious and trans women.

2378
02:01:00,040 --> 02:01:03,200
Speaker 1: And UM, these are all also facts to men who

2379
02:01:03,280 --> 02:01:05,520
Speaker 1: have previously been on my phone over the last I

2380
02:01:05,560 --> 02:01:07,840
Speaker 1: would say ten years. UM, I have gotten them to

2381
02:01:07,880 --> 02:01:11,680
Speaker 1: open up about this. UM. So, as someone in banking

2382
02:01:12,360 --> 02:01:16,920
Speaker 1: and someone in law, we have too smart, brilliant UM

2383
02:01:17,560 --> 02:01:21,000
Speaker 1: minority women here. I want to know you guys just

2384
02:01:21,160 --> 02:01:24,080
Speaker 1: take on. If a man came to you and let

2385
02:01:24,160 --> 02:01:26,120
Speaker 1: you know that he was either interested in men or

2386
02:01:26,240 --> 02:01:29,880
Speaker 1: trans or questioned his sexuality, is that something that you

2387
02:01:29,920 --> 02:01:32,760
Speaker 1: would move forward with and why or why not, um

2388
02:01:33,200 --> 02:01:37,320
Speaker 1: who wants to take this first? Um? Back in the day,

2389
02:01:37,560 --> 02:01:39,200
Speaker 1: I would be like, hey, no, get the funk on

2390
02:01:39,280 --> 02:01:41,560
Speaker 1: my face. But they just said I listen to horrible decisions.

2391
02:01:41,560 --> 02:01:44,920
Speaker 1: And no, I'm serious, Like I think as I've gotten older,

2392
02:01:45,080 --> 02:01:48,320
Speaker 1: I've evolved sexually, like as you should as you get older,

2393
02:01:48,360 --> 02:01:51,160
Speaker 1: like it gets better, you learn more stuff. So now

2394
02:01:51,480 --> 02:01:54,200
Speaker 1: I'm I'm okay with it. Like now I'll be like, okay,

2395
02:01:54,320 --> 02:01:56,280
Speaker 1: like how you want to do this? Do you wan?

2396
02:01:56,800 --> 02:01:58,560
Speaker 1: Do you want me there? Do you not want me there?

2397
02:01:58,600 --> 02:02:00,760
Speaker 1: Because before I would have been like hell no, like

2398
02:02:01,160 --> 02:02:02,960
Speaker 1: I can't deal with it, Like there's something a man

2399
02:02:03,200 --> 02:02:05,360
Speaker 1: has that I can't give you. But if it's just

2400
02:02:05,480 --> 02:02:09,120
Speaker 1: something you you feel like you can't truly be yourself,

2401
02:02:09,920 --> 02:02:12,040
Speaker 1: who am I to stop you from doing that? Because

2402
02:02:12,040 --> 02:02:14,120
Speaker 1: you're not going to be living in yourself. Here's my question.

2403
02:02:14,720 --> 02:02:16,520
Speaker 1: If you know you can't give him what a man

2404
02:02:16,640 --> 02:02:19,560
Speaker 1: may give him, would you be okay with being in

2405
02:02:19,640 --> 02:02:22,600
Speaker 1: the room with him and another man? Or oh you

2406
02:02:22,640 --> 02:02:29,560
Speaker 1: would today? And so no, like