Speaker 1: There's room for a half dozen beers and some snackables.
Speaker 1: We're cleaning out the dorm fridge. One more thing.
Speaker 2: I'm the mini fridge, one of the greatest conventions of
Speaker 2: all time.
Speaker 1: Oh so true, so true, so unobtrusive, so easily fit
Speaker 1: in virtually any space, and yet keeps food cold, so
Speaker 1: you don't have to walk over there.
Speaker 2: Or we can have it at work, or you know whatever.
Speaker 2: You can't bring a big, giant refrigerator into your office
Speaker 2: at work, you can have a little mini fridge tucked
Speaker 2: underneath your cubicle, right, or your.
Speaker 1: Main refrigerator looks respectable and nobody has any idea what
Speaker 1: a boozer you are because you've got the mini fridge
Speaker 1: over there in the man cave. I'm speaking for a
Speaker 1: friend anyway, So we've got a little cleaning out to do.
Speaker 1: We're gonna start slightly outragey, but move toward pure delight.
Speaker 1: Who's in the mood for some pure delight? Sounds like
Speaker 1: you're about to get touched unethically, all right, Michael, We'll
Speaker 1: start fourteen.
Speaker 2: Brace yourself, imagine faking your own assassination attempt for the
Speaker 2: third time, and then everybody should have subset that it
Speaker 2: wasn't real and that you didn't croak.
Speaker 3: I wake up each morning hoping he has died. I
Speaker 3: go to bed each night hoping by the time I
Speaker 3: get up in the morning, he has died. For the
Speaker 3: love of all things good.
Speaker 2: Shocked he died. They missed again. It's America.
Speaker 4: Missed a kid.
Speaker 3: If somebody misses one more time, nobody wants to work
Speaker 3: these days.
Speaker 2: Nobody wants to get out there and work. Wow, that's
Speaker 2: just a couple of days.
Speaker 1: Quickie roundup of deranged leftists saying what they said about
Speaker 1: the latest attempted assassination of Donald J.
Speaker 5: I need America.
Speaker 2: I've known two people it was back first term, but
Speaker 2: two people who they weren't I at least not out
Speaker 2: loud to the point of wanting him assassinated. But they
Speaker 2: were definitely in the every single day of their lives.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, what did he do now? Oh? Oh oh.
Speaker 2: I don't even want to look living their lives in
Speaker 2: such pain. For the existence of Donald Trump as president
Speaker 2: seems so crazy to me. How do you know it
Speaker 2: fulfills the psychological need of something? Clearly? Yeah, clearly it does.
Speaker 1: Boy. Anyway, eh, Amazement and outrage. But I promised you
Speaker 1: pure delight and here it comes.
Speaker 2: Does this need any setting up?
Speaker 1: Michael?
Speaker 5: The year was nineteen ninety and this was a video
Speaker 5: that explains here's how to use the Internet and what
Speaker 5: it is.
Speaker 2: Oh boy. The browser is the application that allows you
Speaker 2: to view all of.
Speaker 1: The information on the web.
Speaker 2: Sometimes you can get it free from your ISP, or
Speaker 2: friend can download it for you on a disc.
Speaker 1: You can also buy a browser or download one from
Speaker 1: the Internet.
Speaker 2: You might want to explain what it means to download.
Speaker 6: It means to transfer a file of information from a
Speaker 6: main computer or server to your computer.
Speaker 5: And it's easy to do too.
Speaker 3: Even I know how you can download games or anything.
Speaker 2: Now you need to connect your ISP.
Speaker 1: You click on the icon and then choose connect.
Speaker 3: You can hear it.
Speaker 1: Dialing sounds weird, humped and now we're online poor in
Speaker 1: nineteen nineties. Porn nineteen nineties. It'll ruin society. Run for
Speaker 1: your lives, Run for your lives.
Speaker 2: Everything you've ever known is about to change for the worse.
Speaker 2: Except for looking things up. That's much better. Yes, And
Speaker 2: I'm not sure it's a good trade off. Oh I
Speaker 2: didn't say that, Moly, nineteen nineties. Early because we started
Speaker 2: ninety two right, kind of getting an internet stuff when
Speaker 2: we were downloading stuff at that job, that first job
Speaker 2: we got together.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, it was ninety two ninety three.
Speaker 2: Man, it was so slow. Just getting text was so slow.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
Speaker 1: We were like trying to download twenty pages of text
Speaker 1: and it would take forty five minutes, and if somebody
Speaker 1: called you during that time, you had to start again.
Speaker 5: I remember if you were downloading porn, it was like,
Speaker 5: there's a head, there's a chest. It just took forever
Speaker 5: for a body to appear.
Speaker 2: There must have been very disappointing to a young masturbating Michaelangel.
Speaker 2: It's all about anticipation.
Speaker 6: The allure sounds like, you know, yeah, it builds up.
Speaker 1: Oh and I tell you what you get down to
Speaker 1: the next you got her shirt on, You're like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I just wasted tens and it cost me
Speaker 1: fifty dollars terribly, and now I'm on a list of
Speaker 1: porn enthusiasts.
Speaker 5: Damn it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, run for your lives nineteen nineties. Imagine ignoring all
Speaker 1: of your friends because you're looking at a screen that
Speaker 1: brings you no joy.
Speaker 2: Well, then why would I look at it? Because you're addicted,
Speaker 2: say goodbye to focusing.
Speaker 1: Whoops, this was supposed to be pure to light and
Speaker 1: then said it was just took a turn. Yeah, it
Speaker 1: took a turn. I swear I won't this one will
Speaker 1: not take a turn. This will stay on the straight
Speaker 1: and narrow of what was the phrase pure delight.
Speaker 2: To hang on a second? Hangout, Katie? Do you want
Speaker 2: to set this one up?
Speaker 1: The restaurant one?
Speaker 6: Yeah, I can't. So this guy he goes into fast
Speaker 6: food restaurants and as he gives as he gets his food,
Speaker 6: he yells the slogan of the restaurant and why just
Speaker 6: because it's funny and people enjoy it.
Speaker 7: I will you know what what because no one pizza
Speaker 7: the Hut together three two one, no one else pizza Hut.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he fresh because of America runs on.
Speaker 2: That taco bell.
Speaker 6: He was yelling live moss oh, and then everybody was
Speaker 6: yelling it back.
Speaker 1: I think to Mike was over at the Burger King
Speaker 1: that was recording him.
Speaker 2: I would like to go into Army's and say we've
Speaker 2: got the meat to absolutely think you should you go
Speaker 2: to McDonald's enough you can do?
Speaker 1: What what is McDonald Well, this is a really attractive
Speaker 1: burger product.
Speaker 2: That's funny. My kids and I we do that joke
Speaker 2: a lot. How do you how do you even attack
Speaker 2: this thing? This is a fine burger product.
Speaker 5: Wow, well, I guess that's it.