Speaker 1: Hell I Suck a Dating with Dengler and Jared Haven
Speaker 1: and I Heart radio podcast What is going On? Suck Army.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to the newest episode of Help I Suck
Speaker 1: at Dating, The first episode where there is no football
Speaker 1: coming up at the end of this week because the
Speaker 1: Kansas City Chiefs just beat the San Francisco forty Niners
Speaker 1: in a football game. I don't think any of you
Speaker 1: really care about that. I doubt that, which would probably
Speaker 1: move on. But how do you guys feel about that?
Speaker 1: How did that impact your relationships? It was fun watching
Speaker 1: the Super Bowl? What did you guys do? Would you watch?
Speaker 1: Do you have a party? I went to a friend's party.
Speaker 1: Actually funny, I went to a friend's party. I haven't
Speaker 1: drank alcohol since I broke my leg. I had five
Speaker 1: white claws and I was very, very drunk. Well, five
Speaker 1: white claws would do it to anybody. I feel like, well,
Speaker 1: my white clauses get me drunk. That's like five bud lights. Basically, yeah,
Speaker 1: that would get me drunk. No way, Oh yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: a light way. Anyways, I got I got very drunk.
Speaker 1: I was very hung over the next day for my
Speaker 1: physical therapy. So all in all, is a successful Super Bowl.
Speaker 1: I think I just watching at home, had a few
Speaker 1: friends over. Dean was invited, but he shows somebody else.
Speaker 1: I was at there for the championship game. He was
Speaker 1: there for both games, so he was at our place
Speaker 1: for seven hours. I'm sorry. I wish I could be
Speaker 1: in two places at once, but I just don't have
Speaker 1: that ability yet me too. Super Bowl Sunday was fun.
Speaker 1: Uh the game was okay. I thought the last few
Speaker 1: minutes before because you were I know, I wanted to
Speaker 1: choose to win. I was bored for like three quarters.
Speaker 1: I thought. I thought it was a pretty it was
Speaker 1: an okay game, and then I thought the last uh
Speaker 1: seven minutes of the game was really good when Casey
Speaker 1: started coming back, and then I just really my only
Speaker 1: wish came true. So I was pretty happy. I wanted
Speaker 1: the ball in Jimmy G's hands at the end of
Speaker 1: the game because I want to know what Jimmy G
Speaker 1: is and what he's not. Let's just figure this out.
Speaker 1: Is he the next guy Ken? Should he have been
Speaker 1: the air apparents Town Brady? Was he going to drive
Speaker 1: his team down the field of the game on the
Speaker 1: line or was he not? And he didn't and he failed,
Speaker 1: so now we have no offense. I mean, he's he's
Speaker 1: a very good quarterback. But I think, you know, when
Speaker 1: when the game's on the line and the bright lights
Speaker 1: are the brightest, I don't know, it's still up in
Speaker 1: the air with mm alright. Halftime show thought, oh my god,
Speaker 1: A lot of that was revolutionary. It was great. I
Speaker 1: was pretty drunk at that point. I was like, well,
Speaker 1: j Loo and Shakira are crushing this right now. You
Speaker 1: know what's you know what surprised me the most about
Speaker 1: the halftime show. When I think about it, I think
Speaker 1: more of Shaquira. And if you have told me j
Speaker 1: Low versus Shaquira, my god, of course jo is gonna
Speaker 1: win ten on a ten times. You would have liked
Speaker 1: to have seen more of Shakira, you're saying, or no,
Speaker 1: I thought Shakira sold show, Okay. I thought Shaquira was uh,
Speaker 1: I don't want to say better than jail j. It
Speaker 1: was awesome. But like when I think of the halftime show,
Speaker 1: they were both great, but I think Shaquira was like six.
Speaker 1: I think that she Wolf might be one of the
Speaker 1: best music videos ever produced. I'm more of a hit
Speaker 1: stone lie that when She's in the mud. I was
Speaker 1: like twelve years old that music video came out. Is
Speaker 1: it very he became a man that had become a
Speaker 1: man that day of my friend. Yeah, I was nineteen
Speaker 1: when She Wolf came out, and as a man already,
Speaker 1: I was very appreciative of it. Anyways, cool story brown, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I thought it was great. And commercials that stood out
Speaker 1: in your mind? What would you like? Well, obviously the
Speaker 1: Brady commercial just because that hit home because he posted
Speaker 1: so he posted a picture on Instagram that black and
Speaker 1: white woe with no caption. Is he walking onto the field?
Speaker 1: Is he walking off the field? Is this is a
Speaker 1: retirement post? Is he leaving? Is he's staying? No one new?
Speaker 1: And then after like a day, I was like, this
Speaker 1: is definitely a Super Bowl ad. Sunday's gonna come. It's
Speaker 1: gonna be commercial. I don't really like it. I yeah,
Speaker 1: just because don't like in the commercial he's like, I
Speaker 1: want everybody to know my friends, my family, most importantly
Speaker 1: my fans. And I was like, come on, bro, like
Speaker 1: I I care, Like, don't don't just string me along,
Speaker 1: you know, So if you're gonna go, go refress me
Speaker 1: what happened? So he he had a commercial saying that
Speaker 1: he's coming back to continue commercial. He made an announcement
Speaker 1: that his new team is Hulu dot Com. He was like,
Speaker 1: I want every He was walking on to Gillette Stadium
Speaker 1: and he's like, you know, they all say good things
Speaker 1: have to come to an end, and I just wanted
Speaker 1: to tell like my friends and my family and most
Speaker 1: importantly my fans. And then it was like this build
Speaker 1: up and then Hulu is offering that, you know, and
Speaker 1: then you got a lot of got paid a lot
Speaker 1: of My mean, you look like a damn stud. We
Speaker 1: had an argument within the household who's hot or Jimmy
Speaker 1: Garoppolo or Tom Brady. I agree, I think I think
Speaker 1: Jimmy's a little over hyped. He's a good looking guy,
Speaker 1: but he's not like the all end what is it,
Speaker 1: uh we all end all hottest guy in football. He's
Speaker 1: a good he's very good looking. Jimmy. Jimmy, Jimmy looks
Speaker 1: like traditionally maybe like if you Tom Brady looks better
Speaker 1: with age, I will say I'm gonna show you if
Speaker 1: he doesn't. If you look at if you look at
Speaker 1: when he was like training in college, He's no, he's
Speaker 1: not have it. Jimmy's got this weird, like sideways smirk,
Speaker 1: like he's like the I don't know, I saw the
Speaker 1: Hulu commercial. Look at that. Look at that man, it's
Speaker 1: in black and white. Jimmy actually, and I'm not a
Speaker 1: huge fan of Jimmy. Actually do not like the forty
Speaker 1: Niners at all. But I will say because you're the
Speaker 1: forty Niners beat your favorite packers. No, not at all.
Speaker 1: I just have always grown up hating the Giants and
Speaker 1: the four Niners with a passion. Why it's just I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm kind of from up there too, so like it
Speaker 1: is a little weird, but Lakers and Dodgers have my heart. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: how does that compute to you? Just hating the forty
Speaker 1: Niners and Giants so random? My whole family is like huge,
Speaker 1: diehard Dodgers. Listen, it doesn't matter San Francisco Giants. Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh so San France in general. That makes sense right
Speaker 1: over there. I want to say it's early, but it's
Speaker 1: it's not. So any other commercials stick out. I have
Speaker 1: the top five from the USA Today ad meters interested
Speaker 1: Jason Momo when it's pretty good. I thought that was
Speaker 1: really good too. It's a little creepy, but good. It
Speaker 1: was weird. Yeah, oh, I have what I know my
Speaker 1: favorite Okay, and I guarantee I know the number one
Speaker 1: on that list. Okay, do you want me to guess?
Speaker 1: Please do? It's Bill Murray's Groundhogg number one on the lift.
Speaker 1: That was definitely the best commercial people getting paid whatever
Speaker 1: you got paid for that, it was worth it because
Speaker 1: it was fantastic Bill Murray, because it was groundhog Day.
Speaker 1: You recreated the movie groundhog Day with original cast, mean
Speaker 1: birth and I thought it was fantastic. They had thirty
Speaker 1: million views in one loves Loves loves that movie. I
Speaker 1: was really excited to screp it. I don't remember that one.
Speaker 1: I'll be honest with you. Have you seen the movie
Speaker 1: groundhol Day? I good, maybe a little before my time.
Speaker 1: And I say that as not the youngest person in
Speaker 1: the room. Anyways, that was number one, smart poc, which
Speaker 1: I thought you would have enjoyed. Oh my god, how
Speaker 1: could I have polm for guy? That was number two?
Speaker 1: You could pocket Fenway dot Chester Salthie. I don't remember
Speaker 1: that one. I told you too many white claws. Man.
Speaker 1: Look at this guy, he fit in this pocket spot.
Speaker 1: Don't be a smarty pants Chris, Oh, it's so sounds funny.
Speaker 1: Don't be saying you haven't seen the commercials. So it's
Speaker 1: Chris Evan, John Krasinski, and Rachel Drafts all from Boston.
Speaker 1: And then it's a Hondai commercial and John Krasiski's parking.
Speaker 1: They're like, hey, you were gonna fit in that spot,
Speaker 1: and he's like, watch me, I got smart pock what
Speaker 1: smock And then he's like, you could pock that. You
Speaker 1: can pock that anyway? Fenway, Yeah, dot Chester, Yeah, Eastcast
Speaker 1: and then big poppies upstairs. Yeah, I have no idea. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just was. I was hoping that Brady would walk
Speaker 1: through it too, because then it would just be like
Speaker 1: Euphouria getting all Boston sports. Number three was the Google
Speaker 1: commercial where the old man talks about all the remembers
Speaker 1: about Loretta. I was. I've seen it three times. It's
Speaker 1: the song. The song was also his voice, the voice
Speaker 1: of an old man who has lived a good life
Speaker 1: and it has Alzheimer's and is forgetting about his dead wife.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, the dad. But he's got a smile
Speaker 1: on his in his voice that he it's fond memories.
Speaker 1: He's not like weeping and remembering his wife. He's just
Speaker 1: remembering all the things she loved. That's why it makes
Speaker 1: it so sad. Yes, Gallops, don't remember that one. You
Speaker 1: don't remember just like the husband. It's so sad. And
Speaker 1: you know what's really weird about that commercial? So they
Speaker 1: had that commercial which was like two minutes long and
Speaker 1: had everybody crying, and then the very next commercial was
Speaker 1: Rick Flair. Did you see that? It was like this emotional,
Speaker 1: heart wrenching commercial with Google where everybody's like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: why are you doing this to me? And then I
Speaker 1: media the next commercial is Rick Flair going, and I
Speaker 1: was like, that's a weird transmission. Wrestler Okay, number four
Speaker 1: was cool Ranch to read it with a little nos action.
Speaker 1: Sam Elliott Showdown. I don't remember that one. And the
Speaker 1: last one was Jason Momoa, which you mentioned that he
Speaker 1: was like he got home from working, he took all
Speaker 1: his big sexy muscles off and sat down and he
Speaker 1: was like trying to bench at the end and he
Speaker 1: was I don't remember what they were selling me, but
Speaker 1: Rocket mortgage, remember right, that's a good point if you
Speaker 1: don't remember what they were felling wasn't a good commercial?
Speaker 1: Probably not, because Rocket Mortgage is not leaving the mind
Speaker 1: when I think of Jason were taking us off? You
Speaker 1: make a good point, and Hulu is the first down
Speaker 1: Brady's mind because everybody's like, oh it was a Hulu commercial.
Speaker 1: Everybody knows what the pot here. Here's a little bit
Speaker 1: of a show me photos man Loretta? Remember Loretta hated mustache?
Speaker 1: And you don't have throw old memories that Google will
Speaker 1: remember for what? Because he can't that old man's voice?
Speaker 1: Did you ever see Ready Player one I loved? I
Speaker 1: can't remember the name the guy that created the oasis?
Speaker 1: I think I think that's the same guy that did
Speaker 1: the voice for that, right, Um, it's the guy who
Speaker 1: created is the guy from LBG or yeah? Um? Oh
Speaker 1: my godways his name? He's the guy from Bridges Spies
Speaker 1: with Tom Hanks. He plays the Mark Rylands thank you.
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know. He does sound like
Speaker 1: him anyways, what were you guys? His favorite commercials? Email
Speaker 1: us I suck a dating at iHeart media dot com.
Speaker 1: Do you remembers none of them? We would love to
Speaker 1: hear them so I could google them when I get
Speaker 1: home and watch them. On YouTube. Um, we got a
Speaker 1: great episode for you guys today. We have dr Ish
Speaker 1: Major coming in is from Marriage boot Camp Reality Stars
Speaker 1: and he is going to help us in our relationships.
Speaker 1: That's a great segment. You're definitely not gonna want to
Speaker 1: miss it. Did you do your homework? We both did
Speaker 1: our homework. Well, We're assigned three questions to answer about
Speaker 1: the relationships. They can go over with dr Ish. Yes,
Speaker 1: three very challenging questions that are definitely gonna get both
Speaker 1: of us in trouble when we answer them live on
Speaker 1: air on our podcast, So stay tuned for that. You're
Speaker 1: not gonna want to miss it. Dr Ish is phenomenal
Speaker 1: and he is going to be able to tell everything
Speaker 1: that he knows. We're also gonna answer some emails at
Speaker 1: the end of the episode, as we usually do. We
Speaker 1: got some juicy breakup texts and maybe we're going to
Speaker 1: disagree on some things, and honestly, we're disagree on some things.
Speaker 1: So stay tuned and we're going to be right back
Speaker 1: right after this break. Hello Stuck Army, welcome back to
Speaker 1: help I suck a dating with very special guests that
Speaker 1: was in studio right now. You will recognize him from
Speaker 1: Marriage boot Camp reality stars. He is a doctor certified
Speaker 1: side chiatrists who specializes as women, children, families, and all
Speaker 1: things dating, mating and relating. He was named the Prestige
Speaker 1: on the Prestigious List of America's I'm gonna really hand
Speaker 1: this up. You were named on the Prestigious list of
Speaker 1: America's top psychiatrists for the last three years, and you
Speaker 1: were recognized by the International Association of Healthcare Professionals as
Speaker 1: one of the leading physicians in the world. It is
Speaker 1: dr ish, major, ladies and gentlemen. Hey, guys, how'd you
Speaker 1: like that intro? Not fantastic? I like that. I got
Speaker 1: a couple of correct phenomen who he is. But first
Speaker 1: of all, can we all say that the word prestigious
Speaker 1: real quick? How do I say? You say prestigious? No,
Speaker 1: I said prestigious. And then also at the very end
Speaker 1: you said leading physicians in the world. That can't be there.
Speaker 1: That's not right, right, leading psychiatrists physicians? Okay, okay, so Dean,
Speaker 1: you're correcting yourself. Thank you very much. Anyways, welcome to
Speaker 1: the studio. Doctors. Happy to have you. Not normally do
Speaker 1: we have such qualified guests, so it's great to have
Speaker 1: you in here. Obviously you come from the same world
Speaker 1: as us. Didn't didn't you do marrige Bootcam? Now I
Speaker 1: almost a marriage bootcamp? Okay, but so Jaden Tanner had
Speaker 1: done marriage Bootcam, and so you're the host of that show. Correct?
Speaker 1: How long have you hosted for? Oh man, this is
Speaker 1: going to be season eleven for me hosting Woe it
Speaker 1: goes fast. I've heard from Tanner and Jade it is
Speaker 1: a difficult experience to say. It is not what you think,
Speaker 1: right because most shows you can show up and kind
Speaker 1: of be you. But for our show, you got to
Speaker 1: show up and be you, and then you got to
Speaker 1: go deeper, which takes a lot, because it's true stories
Speaker 1: about who you are and where you're struggling, where I
Speaker 1: may be weak, and because of that, where we may
Speaker 1: be weeks. It's it's a lot. So for the lesser
Speaker 1: informed myself and the audience that might not have seen
Speaker 1: the show to give us a quick rundown on exactly
Speaker 1: what happens. So what we do is we will take
Speaker 1: your favorite reality stars, we bring you in for a
Speaker 1: relationship boot camp, and it is couples therapy like no
Speaker 1: other couples therapy. You've ever seen. It is intense. We
Speaker 1: take the first five days and we break you down
Speaker 1: and we beat you up, as Jaden Tanner will the
Speaker 1: test too, and then the last five days we build
Speaker 1: you back up, and on day ten you make your decision,
Speaker 1: your final decision do we leave together or do we
Speaker 1: leave apart? And and it's good. So it's just like
Speaker 1: a very long, extended intense therapy session. It is, it is,
Speaker 1: but it's but it's not traditional. Therapy is very non conventional.
Speaker 1: We've got you doing drills and running from dogs and
Speaker 1: jumping in lakes, and you want to get into the
Speaker 1: break right exactly. We want you to experience the emotion
Speaker 1: of it so we can see how that plays out
Speaker 1: in your relationship. Then when I see that now I
Speaker 1: can help. I remember watching and there was one time
Speaker 1: where you guys had Tanner and Jade on there, and
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure Jade played dead and Tanner had to
Speaker 1: be next to her and say all the things he
Speaker 1: never could say to Jade when she was alive, and
Speaker 1: it was a very traumatic experience for just a friend. Watching,
Speaker 1: I was like, wow, right, oh god, this is emotional, guys.
Speaker 1: I don't know if I could take this it's a lot, right,
Speaker 1: it's a lot. But and we try to drive those
Speaker 1: points home that sneak up on you in life, right
Speaker 1: because we're in l a as of two weeks. We
Speaker 1: know life is not promised to us tomorrow. We don't
Speaker 1: know what's going to happen. So what are you waiting
Speaker 1: to say those things for? Same today? To say those
Speaker 1: things a conflict? Right? Uh? In a relationship, we think
Speaker 1: the relationship isn't going well. If we're having an intense
Speaker 1: discussion or heated discussion or an argument. We think something's
Speaker 1: wrong while I'm not doing this right, or maybe they
Speaker 1: don't love me as much, or maybe I don't love
Speaker 1: them as much? What does this mean? And so we
Speaker 1: just tend to avoid conflict, especially guys. We don't like
Speaker 1: to get into conflict with our significant other, our better half,
Speaker 1: our female better half, because we know we're not gonna
Speaker 1: win that emotional conflict, right, and we take that genie
Speaker 1: out the bottle. We don't know how to put it
Speaker 1: back in, so best to just avoid it. Do you
Speaker 1: anthing that guys are just unwilling to be vulnerable. I
Speaker 1: think that's a big part of it. Jared Um unwilling
Speaker 1: to be vulnerable because if I am vulnerable, do I
Speaker 1: really know what's underneath there? Because growing up we're not
Speaker 1: encouraged to explore that. Right, It's not about get in
Speaker 1: touch with your feelings. Think about if you got a
Speaker 1: five year old kid, a five year old girl, and
Speaker 1: a five year old boy both fall and skin their knee, right,
Speaker 1: what do you tell the boy? Get up, shake it off,
Speaker 1: walk it off. It's gonna be all right. But how
Speaker 1: do you hand to look? Oh my goodness, are you okay?
Speaker 1: You know, how do you feel? Let's you know, let's
Speaker 1: put a pretty band aid on it and you process
Speaker 1: those emotions right there on the spot. So it's a
Speaker 1: whole different thing. Yeah, what do you think about that?
Speaker 1: Do you think that should change? I think it's definitely
Speaker 1: gotta change. I think it's starting to change. But as parents,
Speaker 1: as the folks who are raising the little ones, we've
Speaker 1: got to make a specific effort to do. So that's
Speaker 1: what I think it's it's you can start to see
Speaker 1: a little bit of a shift. I'd imagine that's hard
Speaker 1: too because as obviously not a parent, but I would
Speaker 1: imagine parenting a child, you're gonna fall into a lot
Speaker 1: of the same things that your parents did when they
Speaker 1: were fathering a parent, mother and you and so you
Speaker 1: kind of get stuck in those bad, bad traits that
Speaker 1: you're passing on to your children. Exactly right, because when
Speaker 1: we live, we learn what we live, and that's what
Speaker 1: we know. It's like, you know, you get married in
Speaker 1: ten years in you looking at me, You're like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I'm my dad. Yeah, it's funny because, uh
Speaker 1: so my father and I don't have the best relations.
Speaker 1: He after like three years of not really talking, he
Speaker 1: flew out to l A and hung out with me
Speaker 1: for like a week. And I hadn't talked to this
Speaker 1: man in three years, and he was doing insane things
Speaker 1: that I say and do all the time. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: that is just genetics. That's not even something like I
Speaker 1: don't know, it's in the genes. It's in the genes.
Speaker 1: So I have a question. So obviously I'm not married,
Speaker 1: but uh am I allowed to go on the show
Speaker 1: with my girlfriend? Absolutely? Really, you guys take couples of
Speaker 1: whether they're married. Sure, for sure, if if you think
Speaker 1: she's the one, if you've got some issues, you're thinking
Speaker 1: she might be the one, you think we might have
Speaker 1: a shot, come on through. I'll be honest with you,
Speaker 1: we don't really have any issues, but i'd love to
Speaker 1: see if we could find some Well, oh we'll find something.
Speaker 1: Absolutely what a young relationship. We don't have any problems, Guys,
Speaker 1: things are going. Do you think that would be a
Speaker 1: fun thing to do? Is like bring like a couple
Speaker 1: that doesn't really have any issue at least on the surface,
Speaker 1: right on the surface, even uncover some stuff and you know,
Speaker 1: it's it's funny as you say that. So a lot
Speaker 1: of our couples from the Bachelors and you know, from
Speaker 1: that franchise on the surface, like we've just got one
Speaker 1: or two little niggly things that you know, it's not
Speaker 1: a big deal. But by day six or seven, it's
Speaker 1: like it all comes out. So you know, it's like
Speaker 1: there's the there's the storm bubbling just beneath the surface.
Speaker 1: Usually when it comes left. I know you guys had
Speaker 1: Shaun and Catherine on there, and then you had JP
Speaker 1: and Ashley, JP and Ashley. Yes, we did Tenner and Jade.
Speaker 1: Is there anybody else? JP and Ashley? We had Desiree
Speaker 1: and Chris. Chris where the last two who came through.
Speaker 1: Chris was tough. How Chris was tough because he was
Speaker 1: so guarded. You know. It was just one of those things.
Speaker 1: Life is perfect. It's always been perfect. I've never had
Speaker 1: any problems. We're perfect, disregard anything she says. We've got
Speaker 1: it all together. And so it just it took a
Speaker 1: long time to get him to that point. It was
Speaker 1: finally on day nine. It was Lie Detective, and we
Speaker 1: finally got to the thing that was really bugging him,
Speaker 1: which was, you know, does she she really all that
Speaker 1: into me? You know, and we've all got those insecurities.
Speaker 1: But it was hard. He was tough. Are they still
Speaker 1: tealing now? Those four couples that you named, j Tanner,
Speaker 1: Catherine and I believe they are and there's just had
Speaker 1: a had a baby. Yea, yeah, yeah, I think they're
Speaker 1: all rocking and rolling, and so I'm sure you get
Speaker 1: a lot of fulfilment coming out the other side of that.
Speaker 1: Even if the couples break up, you're like, Okay, well
Speaker 1: maybe you broke up because there was a lot of
Speaker 1: underlying issues that we wouldn't have gotten to us. Look,
Speaker 1: sometimes the best outcome is is no outcome is the
Speaker 1: breakup we had. We had poly d and Rby come
Speaker 1: on there, and it was like, you know, by day five,
Speaker 1: I'm looking at both of them like, really, this is
Speaker 1: what I was trying to do. And so sometimes the
Speaker 1: best thing is, you know, I don't promise to keep
Speaker 1: you together. I promised to get you an answer by
Speaker 1: the By day ten, you will know if you can
Speaker 1: show up and be all of who you are and
Speaker 1: be happy with this person in your life. You have
Speaker 1: that you'll have some inkling as far as whether you
Speaker 1: want to move forward or maybe we should take some
Speaker 1: time apart. And sometimes it's painfully obvious that, right I
Speaker 1: forgot Polydin Rby. I recently just met Aubrey on an
Speaker 1: X on the Beach Reunion love. I love her to
Speaker 1: choose so sweet. Yeah, she's super nice. She recently you know,
Speaker 1: unblocked me on Twitter. Right right, I'm sold. I want
Speaker 1: to do the show. I feel like it'd be fun
Speaker 1: for me and God, what a naive uman until Klin
Speaker 1: is like in a body bag and you have to
Speaker 1: say all the things that you couldn't tell her when
Speaker 1: she's a look. I know that when I say that
Speaker 1: we communicate in her honest with each other about everything,
Speaker 1: I'm sure that there are some things that we aren't
Speaker 1: entirely honest about, of course, but sitting in the chair
Speaker 1: right now, it's hard for me to imagine a situation
Speaker 1: where we would have difficulty explaining something to the other person.
Speaker 1: So that's kind of why I'm like, this sounds pretty fun,
Speaker 1: Like fun, isn't If you're a good communicator, right then
Speaker 1: then it will be great because I think we get
Speaker 1: better being able to go into something like that. And
Speaker 1: I'm sure this is why all the couples do the show,
Speaker 1: is because you can go into something like that and
Speaker 1: come out the other side so much stronger. And it's not,
Speaker 1: like I said, Kaylin and I it's not like anything's
Speaker 1: going wrong. But to come out of something, regardless of
Speaker 1: what it is or why we went there, to come
Speaker 1: out even stronger than we already are, that's a beautiful thing.
Speaker 1: It's a beautiful thing. And Dean, what usually happens is
Speaker 1: what couples will come in and like, well, these are
Speaker 1: the you know, these are some things we would like
Speaker 1: to work on. These are some issues we you know,
Speaker 1: maybe meeting down the road. But around Dave five or six,
Speaker 1: you realize that you've got your own personal journey to
Speaker 1: get Oh, you know what, I've got some stuff that
Speaker 1: I need to of course correct before if we really
Speaker 1: want to do this, and that's when the cool stuff
Speaker 1: to happen. I say we start this right now. I said,
Speaker 1: we asked being a couple of questions whether he'd last
Speaker 1: your marriage. I have I have one right off the top.
Speaker 1: That's unfair. Answer this question only a question towards you,
Speaker 1: not towards camp Why are you and Caitlin? Why do
Speaker 1: you not want you two together to do public interviews.
Speaker 1: I don't want the outside looking and on our relationship
Speaker 1: and making accusations or judgment calls based on a little
Speaker 1: snippet of a thing. Oh, I'm sure you do fantastic
Speaker 1: on marriage through camp boy, because you don't want outside
Speaker 1: people judging your relationship. I can see why that would
Speaker 1: sound like that would happen on the show. But also interviews.
Speaker 1: You granted, when a TV you can't really control the
Speaker 1: edit that you get either, but it's just like the
Speaker 1: interview thing is so easy to just be like, look,
Speaker 1: we're just not gonna do interviews together because we don't
Speaker 1: need that added pressure from the outside world assuming things
Speaker 1: about a relationship that they know anything about. Well, I guess,
Speaker 1: what are you afraid of? What are you nervous about
Speaker 1: doing a public of you together? I'm personally, I don't like,
Speaker 1: what are you afraid is going to come out? We're
Speaker 1: not afraid of anything. I don't think really that's a
Speaker 1: fear thing. It's just a matter of Uh, you've been
Speaker 1: in public relationships before, you're in one right now, and
Speaker 1: I've been in I think I've been in a few
Speaker 1: more public relationships than you have, and I've seen that
Speaker 1: the way that the media can like turn things to
Speaker 1: make you look bad in your relationship, and then that
Speaker 1: like leads to insecurity in the relationship for whatever reason,
Speaker 1: probably for lack of communication. I don't think this relationship
Speaker 1: that I have with Kalen would really take a negative
Speaker 1: hit if we were to do joint interviews, but I've
Speaker 1: seen how they can have a negative effect, and so
Speaker 1: I want to stay away from those. Sure, of course
Speaker 1: they can have a negative effect, but the only reason
Speaker 1: I feel like they have a negative effect is because
Speaker 1: a part of whatever they did is true. Because if
Speaker 1: it wasn't true, then you can easily just blame the publication,
Speaker 1: but if it caused conflict within your own relationship, then
Speaker 1: there's obviously, like we said, an underlying issue there, right,
Speaker 1: But how many interviews have you done, and how many
Speaker 1: of those interviews have they used five percent of the
Speaker 1: words that you've said, and the five percent of the
Speaker 1: world time ones that they are the most attention grab
Speaker 1: you know, all the time. But the reason I got
Speaker 1: so mad at it be as there was like I
Speaker 1: had to defend myself in a way that while it
Speaker 1: wasn't a complete fabrication, Uh sure they took my words
Speaker 1: out of context, but that doesn't mean it was a
Speaker 1: complete lie. Right. Well, I guess at my point, the
Speaker 1: one headline that I can think of that it didn't
Speaker 1: even get me in trouble, but it was like annoying,
Speaker 1: annoying thing to deal with was when I said that
Speaker 1: I was never gonna get married. I was never gonna
Speaker 1: marry Kalin, right, and then they published these articles it's
Speaker 1: like Dean's never marrying girlfriend Klin Miller Keys and it's
Speaker 1: like I'm looking at Calin like, you know, this is ridiculous, right,
Speaker 1: and she goes, yeah, it's a santor next to you
Speaker 1: when all this is being said, and this is a
Speaker 1: must absurd thing. Ever, But but that headline gets taken
Speaker 1: and run by all these you know, trating news outlets,
Speaker 1: and then that like just lets other people into a
Speaker 1: relationship and assume things that they don't know anything about.
Speaker 1: And she's got to defend that right, and I have
Speaker 1: to sit there and defend it too because it's my
Speaker 1: relationship as well. It's just frustrating. So what you're talking
Speaker 1: about is you're introducing an unnecessary stressor to the relationship,
Speaker 1: like marriage bootcamp. It's not it's not's what I mean.
Speaker 1: So my question is, why would you want to do
Speaker 1: because here's the difference. When you go to marriage bootcamp,
Speaker 1: you can come out of it of stronger, better couple.
Speaker 1: When you go into a joint interview, you don't gain
Speaker 1: anything from that. All you're doing is giving people insight
Speaker 1: into something that they don't need to know anything really about.
Speaker 1: But we're not benefiting from it, you know, like we're
Speaker 1: not coming out of the interview stronger as a couple. Well,
Speaker 1: here's what would happen. I feel like a married to
Speaker 1: peer camp, you would that would be a topic that
Speaker 1: gets brought up, right, and then the immediate question afterwards
Speaker 1: it said, well, Dean, you said an interview let's talk
Speaker 1: about it right now with Klin. Will you ever marry Klin? Yeah,
Speaker 1: that would be something that you'd have to face. It's
Speaker 1: good in the moment, right, absolutely be willing to face that.
Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden Calin's like, well, I
Speaker 1: hope so one day and then you're like, well, I
Speaker 1: don't believe in the institution of marriage, and then bought
Speaker 1: a bang boada boom. But the thing is, this is
Speaker 1: the stuff that we talked about all the time anyway,
Speaker 1: which is a very good thing. Do you think now,
Speaker 1: I'm very curious, do you think Klin, because you don't
Speaker 1: have set publicly you don't believe in the institution to marriage,
Speaker 1: do you think you'll ever budge from that? I don't
Speaker 1: think that I am dead set enough in that conviction
Speaker 1: to be like I'm the potential of the change is
Speaker 1: always there, of course, right, So obviously I can see
Speaker 1: why a friend would hear me say that and cling
Speaker 1: on the idea, oh he's going to change later on exactly.
Speaker 1: But again I just think it's all ridiculous. Better question,
Speaker 1: do you believe in having a long term partner? Yes? Absolutely, Yeah,
Speaker 1: And that's the thing too. It's like Um, it's not
Speaker 1: that I believe I believe against marriage because of the
Speaker 1: monogamy of it all or whatever, the partner life, partner
Speaker 1: of it all. It's just had to think of the
Speaker 1: marriage and general is still not to discredit anything. I
Speaker 1: think there's more married people in this room than there
Speaker 1: are non married people in this room. And you're all
Speaker 1: beautiful and you have wonderful relationships. That's all. That's all
Speaker 1: of us right there. Yeah, Dean's guy coming with the
Speaker 1: guy doesn't believe in the institution of marriage. Dean is
Speaker 1: wearing a ring on his left hand and used to say,
Speaker 1: we didn't get married. But the point of this, and
Speaker 1: that's exactly why I'm wearing this. And but you're right
Speaker 1: in line with where most couples, most younger couples are
Speaker 1: right now. A lot of younger couples they're just not
Speaker 1: doing it, or they're pushing it off. They're not doing
Speaker 1: in their twenties, they're thinking about it now in they're
Speaker 1: late thirties or you early forties, or they're just not
Speaker 1: doing it at all because they realized, hey, you know,
Speaker 1: mom and dad did it and it kind of sucks.
Speaker 1: So let's try to figure out a different way to
Speaker 1: work around, you know, and there's some agreements we can
Speaker 1: have between us, but we don't need it to be
Speaker 1: formalized here if it's formalized in our and so Caitlin,
Speaker 1: were eight months into our relationship, right, and obviously it's
Speaker 1: it's very early on to be making any type of
Speaker 1: predictions for the future. But I could see uh spending
Speaker 1: a lifetime with Kaylin, right, But that doesn't necessarily in statements, right.
Speaker 1: That's that's my point is even if I'm spending a
Speaker 1: lifetime with this person, doesn't nessarily I'm gonna get married
Speaker 1: to them. But you do realize that if you went
Speaker 1: on a show like marriag Bootcamp, not to say anything
Speaker 1: negative about it, but of course that would become the
Speaker 1: central Then the next question obviously would be, well, if
Speaker 1: you're willing to spend the rest of your life with someone,
Speaker 1: why are you so unwilling to put a ring on
Speaker 1: her and and really solidify it. And that's a question
Speaker 1: I'll have to answer in the moment exactly. And you
Speaker 1: can see how like it would just be a lot
Speaker 1: it's just be aware, here's here's here's the benefit of it.
Speaker 1: On the show, we don't stop at the sound bite, right,
Speaker 1: you get you get a chance to tell the whole story,
Speaker 1: and then you also get a chance to tell the
Speaker 1: backstory that got you to the current, So people get
Speaker 1: a deeper understanding of who you are as Dean's like,
Speaker 1: oh okay, I see who Dean is now and I
Speaker 1: totally get it. And so that works. And when I
Speaker 1: think of marriage boot Camp and why it would be
Speaker 1: interesting for Caitlin and I to partake in it, it's
Speaker 1: not for the audience is sick, but it would be
Speaker 1: nice to be able to go into like a pressure
Speaker 1: cooker as a couple and put the relationship to the test.
Speaker 1: Good word for it. Yeah, I've I've wanted the duke.
Speaker 1: I I've encouraged me and a former girlfriend of mine
Speaker 1: to do a couple of therapy. I've never done it before,
Speaker 1: and she she denied it. She didn't want to do it. Um,
Speaker 1: So I've always kind of been curious about, you know,
Speaker 1: what it would be like, especially with me because I'm
Speaker 1: an idiot. I talked myself in circles all the time.
Speaker 1: I don't really know what I'm saying half the time. Uh,
Speaker 1: but it wouldn't be going on the show wouldn't be.
Speaker 1: I want other people to get a glimpse of our
Speaker 1: relationship through whatever lens that they show for it, but
Speaker 1: I would like to see what her and I can
Speaker 1: get out of it together, you know what I mean? Sure?
Speaker 1: I mean actually, and I've talked about going to a
Speaker 1: couple of therapy as well, just to kind of I mean,
Speaker 1: like we So I don't think we have issues in
Speaker 1: the relationship, but there's nothing also wrong with kind of
Speaker 1: maintaining or just kind of going and seeing, hey, is
Speaker 1: there deep underlying issues that we don't communicate on and
Speaker 1: kind of just work on the relationship together. Yeah, And
Speaker 1: they answer that question is yes, it's a it's a
Speaker 1: human thing. We've all got underlying issues. We've got areas
Speaker 1: where we're not strong, whether it's communication, whether it's trust,
Speaker 1: whether stuff we've been through in the past, and we're
Speaker 1: not over where there's forgiveness when we really need to,
Speaker 1: And so why not do something? Why not be proactive
Speaker 1: about it and strengthen those areas before they come up
Speaker 1: and blindside you and you're like, oh my god, what
Speaker 1: just happened? So yeah, it just makes sense. DR. Do
Speaker 1: you believe in marriage? Do you believe in Okay. So
Speaker 1: you believe in marriage. You know my folks marri for
Speaker 1: fifty six years, um, and so I know what that
Speaker 1: level of commitment looks like day in, day out, five
Speaker 1: of us, five sisters, you know, two guys to brothers,
Speaker 1: And so I know what happens to the kids when
Speaker 1: the house is full of certainty and full of love.
Speaker 1: And so I believe in the long term commitment. I
Speaker 1: don't think you necessarily have to sign on the dotted line.
Speaker 1: I think if you are committed to each other and
Speaker 1: you are dedicated to moving this forward, and you just
Speaker 1: and this is as simple as a decision. Hey, I've
Speaker 1: decided that I'm not gonna leave no matter what. That's
Speaker 1: my decision. I've decided to stay with you, knowing that
Speaker 1: my happiness is not dependent on your behavior. Right, whether
Speaker 1: you show up and you're in a good mood or
Speaker 1: a bad mood, you're irritable or you're or you're sad,
Speaker 1: or you're up or your down, I'm gonna be happy
Speaker 1: with me. And I've decided to stick this out with you.
Speaker 1: And I think the biggest thing when it comes to
Speaker 1: that long term commitment is understand it too. A long
Speaker 1: time for me to get to this place was to
Speaker 1: understand that I am not responsible for your happiness. I
Speaker 1: can't make you happy. I can't buy you enough flowers
Speaker 1: or take you on enough trips or right, there's nothing
Speaker 1: I can do to help you. Ma, You've got to
Speaker 1: find that level on your own, and then I am
Speaker 1: blissfully happy being here helping you maintain it when I
Speaker 1: maintain my own. Do you have any advice for people
Speaker 1: out there listening on how to get to that point point?
Speaker 1: To get to that point of accepting I can't make
Speaker 1: you happy and the only happiness that I can uh
Speaker 1: allow is my own, or like, the only happiness I
Speaker 1: control is my own. I think once you go on
Speaker 1: that journey to find your own, then you got it.
Speaker 1: Because it's because it's not easy. Hell, I'm a psychiatrist,
Speaker 1: and I can't even tell you that I'm there every
Speaker 1: day of the week. It's a it's a constant daily decision.
Speaker 1: I wake up every morning, the first thing I think
Speaker 1: of is you know what I wonder what makes me
Speaker 1: happy today? Let's let's see how I can get some
Speaker 1: more of that juice in my life. And once you've
Speaker 1: gone on that journey for yourself and figuring out what
Speaker 1: that is right, putting all those demons to rest, slain
Speaker 1: those demons, whatever those demons are, with its old family stuff,
Speaker 1: old relationship stuff, how you show up in the world stuff,
Speaker 1: Who accepts me? Who likes me? So once you're going
Speaker 1: on that journey, you've gotten closer and closer and closer
Speaker 1: to that inner source, that inner self, that thing that
Speaker 1: talks to you, and it's a true voice every single
Speaker 1: time when you decide to listen to it. Once you've
Speaker 1: found that, you can recognize it in somebody else immediately
Speaker 1: when they have it and when they don't, and then
Speaker 1: those two things will kind of come together automatically and
Speaker 1: you don't even have to make that decision, and it
Speaker 1: will decide for it self. These two were given homework.
Speaker 1: I like homework and discuss with you, and they are
Speaker 1: ready for it. They planted it out and I think
Speaker 1: they're a little nervous about it. We're not very good
Speaker 1: at homework. That were nervous about the fact that we
Speaker 1: didn't do the homework. You look, you're talking to a
Speaker 1: guy who's in a school for fourteen years. I'm a
Speaker 1: homeworker there. You know. It was one of the worst
Speaker 1: times of high school was when you had the rows
Speaker 1: of desk and you had to hand your homework forward.
Speaker 1: Embarrassing moment where the person behind you would look at
Speaker 1: you as if pass your homework forward and you're just
Speaker 1: like I I didn't do look back towards the teacher.
Speaker 1: All right. Number one, think of one thing in your
Speaker 1: relationship you want to improve, Jared, you can start with
Speaker 1: Dean with you. Here's the thing about the relationships you're married.
Speaker 1: Yours is much more stable, so you can obviously lead
Speaker 1: off these these questions. I think that's the most appropriate
Speaker 1: with it tackless um so on how to improve the relationship.
Speaker 1: I think one thing I would like to improve in
Speaker 1: mine and ashle his marriage. Uh. It again is on
Speaker 1: me is to um live more in the moment rather
Speaker 1: than being so paranoid about the future, especially living in
Speaker 1: Los Angeles and the industry that we're in. I feel
Speaker 1: a lot of times I'm just waiting for the rug
Speaker 1: to be pulled out underneath because there isn't a lot
Speaker 1: of certainty here and for me to be told, you know,
Speaker 1: every social media has gone, podcast is gone. Uh, and uh,
Speaker 1: you know, good luck and figure it out and then
Speaker 1: Ashley and I kind of coming to not coming to grods.
Speaker 1: I just feel like I think I've accepted the fact
Speaker 1: that I am able to live a life back east
Speaker 1: small town, uh, And I don't think Ashley is on
Speaker 1: that same level as me, and that that's what concerns
Speaker 1: me a lot of times that if this doesn't keep going,
Speaker 1: what we're doing right now doesn't keep going, we won't
Speaker 1: reach the expectations that actually has for her life. And
Speaker 1: that concerns me. And so I think the way to
Speaker 1: improve our relationship is for me not to project into
Speaker 1: the future, but rather just live in the moment and
Speaker 1: enjoy it and then keep working hard and then hopefully
Speaker 1: in the at the end of the day that will
Speaker 1: pay off. Yeah. So two words that you said that
Speaker 1: I've picked up on. One is certainty, which is what
Speaker 1: we're all looking for to a certain degree. And then expectations.
Speaker 1: And you're still your your newly wed still correct, just
Speaker 1: married in August and August right, so congratulations, thank you
Speaker 1: very much. And so, yeah, you want the certainty and
Speaker 1: you want to be able to provide that because that's
Speaker 1: part of what makes you feel good and in the relationship.
Speaker 1: Here's what I will tell you, um, take your expectations
Speaker 1: about how to live in the moment. You said you're
Speaker 1: trying to live in the moment. So the way to
Speaker 1: live in the moment is take your expectations and turn
Speaker 1: into appreciation, and you just wake up and appreciate what
Speaker 1: you have in front of you. I've had this beautiful
Speaker 1: woman right here next to me. We got this beautiful life.
Speaker 1: I get to come in and work with these amazing
Speaker 1: people every single day. And so you appreciate that because
Speaker 1: everything has the brain doesn't work in negatives, right, Every
Speaker 1: subject is two subjects. It's what is wanted and what
Speaker 1: is not wanted. And whatever you're focusing on is what
Speaker 1: you're going to get. And so if you're if you're
Speaker 1: focused on the uncertainty and how it's gonna look when
Speaker 1: I gotta tell last year we gotta move back east,
Speaker 1: then that's what you're gonna get. Right, Stay focused on
Speaker 1: the appreciation. This is what I have, and this is
Speaker 1: what's working, and this is what I'm loving, and forget
Speaker 1: everything else, and everything else will just drip and fall
Speaker 1: away from your life. And and that's how you and
Speaker 1: then and then there is no hopefully it works out.
Speaker 1: It just works out because you're staying blissful and happy
Speaker 1: in the moment and you're always in appreciation. You know
Speaker 1: what really helps me with that is my dog. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know that sounds ridiculous, but sometimes when I get
Speaker 1: so overwhelmed with uh frivolous things that at the end
Speaker 1: of the day won't matter, but in the moment seemed
Speaker 1: like the biggest things ever. Sometimes my dog will just
Speaker 1: I'll put food down and she is just the happiest
Speaker 1: thing alive because there's food on the ground. Or we're
Speaker 1: about to go on a walk, which I am piste
Speaker 1: off about because I don't want to take her on
Speaker 1: a walk. You know, it's a lot o plocket knights.
Speaker 1: She's got to go one more time. I'm like, all right,
Speaker 1: let's just go. Let's go, And she is just the
Speaker 1: happiest thing alive. And then I realized, why am I
Speaker 1: so like, why am I so upset about things that
Speaker 1: aren't gonna mender no matter at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: when like, she's the happiest thing alive because she's going
Speaker 1: outside and I have I'm married, i have you know,
Speaker 1: a nice apartment, I have a great job. Um, and
Speaker 1: I let these things just bring me down because it
Speaker 1: just seems like they're the worst things in the world
Speaker 1: when at the end of the day, they're not gonna matter.
Speaker 1: It's not gonna matter. And think about the scope of
Speaker 1: your life. It's always worked out. It's working out. Knock
Speaker 1: on wood, that's what Ashley says, that's what working out.
Speaker 1: That's what makes you so concerned, Like I feel like
Speaker 1: that's gonna be on like my tembstone, it always works out,
Speaker 1: does it? Just like entragh, I want to back check
Speaker 1: for a second. You said you have a job. What's
Speaker 1: this job that I'm sitting on it? Buddy, This isn't
Speaker 1: a job. I just said it, like you know, I
Speaker 1: meant in turn of also from social media and what
Speaker 1: I'm saying and hosting and the things that we're able
Speaker 1: to do. If you want know, what's funny is mine
Speaker 1: and Kalin's improvement, I think is the opposite of what
Speaker 1: yours is. I think we live too much in the moment,
Speaker 1: and in my opinion, both of us don't have enough
Speaker 1: direction on what we want to be doing long term
Speaker 1: or even short term or middle term. You know, like
Speaker 1: we both have interests and we both like to do
Speaker 1: things together, but we don't know if that's necessarily going
Speaker 1: to lead to success maybe professionally later on, or what
Speaker 1: that necessarily holds for us. Like whenever we take meetings
Speaker 1: or like we we talk about what we want to
Speaker 1: be doing in the future, it's it's never really met
Speaker 1: with any certainty. It's always kind of like, well, I
Speaker 1: don't know, we'll figure it out when we get there,
Speaker 1: you know, because we're too focused on the things that
Speaker 1: we're doing in the moment, whether it's traveling or taking
Speaker 1: pictures or hanging out with our new dog too or
Speaker 1: whatever it is. So it's that's one thing that I
Speaker 1: think that we could work on improving, is figuring out
Speaker 1: exactly what we want to be doing in the future. So, Deane,
Speaker 1: here's how you figure that out. We were all born
Speaker 1: with this amazing guidance system called your emotions. Right, if
Speaker 1: you're doing something when you feel crappy doing it, don't
Speaker 1: do it. Staying in the moment gets you exactly what
Speaker 1: you want, right, so you're actually doing it the right way.
Speaker 1: I'm doing this thing that's making me happy today, and
Speaker 1: so tomorrow chance and I'm gonna end up doing something's
Speaker 1: gonna make me happy tomorrow. And you just keep going
Speaker 1: with that. And I was gonna chime in earlier when
Speaker 1: you were talking about in order to have a fruitful
Speaker 1: relationship with someone else, you have to learn how to
Speaker 1: love yourself and do the things that make you happy.
Speaker 1: And when I think about, uh, my relationship now and why,
Speaker 1: in my opinion, is the best relationship I've been And
Speaker 1: it's because earlier in twenty nineteen, I started doing those
Speaker 1: things like I got my skydiving license, I've been rock
Speaker 1: climbing more, I moved into the van full time to
Speaker 1: travel more, and all these things that I was doing
Speaker 1: for myself, which has ultimately led me to be more
Speaker 1: content in my relationship and happy with the things that
Speaker 1: I'm doing on my own that I can, you know,
Speaker 1: bring someone else into if I want to and they
Speaker 1: want to, etcetera, and you'd get to share it. Right this,
Speaker 1: you are not responsible for for making me happy. I
Speaker 1: hate when people say, oh, you know, relationships with yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a hundred one hundred. You gotta show you a
Speaker 1: hundred percent grown self and then they've got to bring
Speaker 1: their grown self And now we've got something. But if
Speaker 1: you've got fifty and you're looking for me to fill
Speaker 1: up your other half. Then hell, I can't fill up
Speaker 1: most of my own in most days of the week,
Speaker 1: so I'm not gonna be able to carry that load
Speaker 1: for you when you need it consistently. In number two, Mark, well, actually,
Speaker 1: you guys have covered a lot of these and what
Speaker 1: you've already said. The second one is what is your
Speaker 1: your biggest flaw in your relationship? Do we know? I
Speaker 1: would say that I don't mind pretty easily. I liked, uh,
Speaker 1: my own my personal time a lot. I'm pretty introverted,
Speaker 1: and so sometimes, especially with Kalin, we spent a lot
Speaker 1: of time together, and there are times where I don't
Speaker 1: know if it's necessarily a flaw, but I'll like, I'll
Speaker 1: communicate to heir, like, hey, you just need some time
Speaker 1: alone for a little bit, like go to your own thing.
Speaker 1: I'll just go to my thing for a couple of
Speaker 1: hours and beat back up. I wouldn't say it's a
Speaker 1: flaw necessarily, but uh, I can sense sometimes like I
Speaker 1: almost feel bad for saying that sometimes, you know, not
Speaker 1: all the time, because it's been a uh it's been
Speaker 1: a thing since we started dating, so it's the expectations
Speaker 1: always been there since the beginning. But sometimes I feel
Speaker 1: a little guilty for it. You feel selfish, yeah, selfish, Yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, yeah, But in reality, you're not being selfish
Speaker 1: because if she's got to force you to be somebody
Speaker 1: who you're not in order for her to be happy
Speaker 1: with you, then hey, you're not going to be happy.
Speaker 1: And then she's not gonna be happy because she knows
Speaker 1: that she's doing some things that you know aren't. I
Speaker 1: don't get to experience the full breadth of who Dean
Speaker 1: is because I need him to be this certain way
Speaker 1: in order for me to do that right. I need
Speaker 1: him to not want that downtime and that me time,
Speaker 1: which I know is gonna make him miserable, but it's
Speaker 1: gonna make me happy. So let's right, So and asking
Speaker 1: for the thing you want right. So this is why
Speaker 1: should come on the show needs and wants right, and
Speaker 1: so that is a need. Hey, I love you to death,
Speaker 1: love hanging out, do all of those things, but I
Speaker 1: need my time right and it's maybe it's a couple
Speaker 1: of hours, and I need to come up with the
Speaker 1: way to ask you for it that doesn't offend you,
Speaker 1: will make you feel like there's something you're doing that
Speaker 1: I don't want. To be around. But once you get
Speaker 1: comfortable asking for those things you need and more especially
Speaker 1: with the newly married folks. Right, never assume that you
Speaker 1: just know, always got to ask, and so you're asking
Speaker 1: for it. That's a good thing. Don't feel selfish about
Speaker 1: it because when I am back, once you give me
Speaker 1: those two or three hours, oh baby, I'm back, and
Speaker 1: you've got all of it right and so, and that's
Speaker 1: that's a good thing. I feel like Ashley always knows. Yeah,
Speaker 1: just today, but tomorrow you're going to be different. It's true, right,
Speaker 1: the doctor issue I was last week, Take a picture
Speaker 1: of that guy, because you're not gonna see him anymore.
Speaker 1: A brand new guy is gonna right. And so in
Speaker 1: long term relationships, we don't allow for the fact that
Speaker 1: we're going to grow and we're going to change. And
Speaker 1: the things I was into, you know, a couple of
Speaker 1: years ago, I'm not into those things anymore, whether it's music,
Speaker 1: whether it's food, whether it's my sexual taste. And we've
Speaker 1: got to be able to carry those ongoing discussions. Folks say, oh,
Speaker 1: we just gotta have a conversation. No, it's an ongoing dialogue,
Speaker 1: and you gotta remember to talk about it every single day. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess my biggest fall in the relationship, that's a
Speaker 1: hard one. I guess my anxiety. But just more so,
Speaker 1: I think for me, it's hard to separate, uh, mine
Speaker 1: and Ashley's relationship from my relationship with my family back east,
Speaker 1: back home. It's hard to really articulate because I romantically,
Speaker 1: I know, yeah, obviously, uh that was a joke. I
Speaker 1: would say, like it's I would say, probably Ashley is
Speaker 1: my family now, but I have family home that I
Speaker 1: miss a lot, right, And it's hard to prioritize that.
Speaker 1: Like I was watching I forgot what movie it was,
Speaker 1: but the whole moral of the movie was that he
Speaker 1: was unable to let go of things. And then at
Speaker 1: the end he's like, no, you are my family, like
Speaker 1: and that's this is the most important thing moving forward,
Speaker 1: and like family changes and so on and so forth.
Speaker 1: And I have a very difficult time separating the two
Speaker 1: because I really want I want to be selfish and
Speaker 1: I want to be with my family that I've been
Speaker 1: born and raised with and have Ashley be a part
Speaker 1: of that, and of course her family too. But actually
Speaker 1: has a much easier time dealing with the like the
Speaker 1: future of things like it's her and I am moving
Speaker 1: forward and having kids and then we're going to do
Speaker 1: our own family, and it's hard for me to separate
Speaker 1: that because then it just feels I guess I'm having
Speaker 1: a hard time of letting go of that well, and
Speaker 1: I think it's up that you have to let go
Speaker 1: of Peter Panza. It's afraid of No, it's just it's just, um,
Speaker 1: it's a shift in responsibility to shift in priority. Is
Speaker 1: like Dan was talking about, it's like asking for the
Speaker 1: things you needed want right. I need to be connected
Speaker 1: to my family. I need that. I feel selfish for
Speaker 1: it because I know that you're here and you're my
Speaker 1: new family and we're building this thing together. But at
Speaker 1: the same time, and so it's just it's not a
Speaker 1: it's not a letting go. It's just figuring out how
Speaker 1: you're going to incorporate everybody because you get to have
Speaker 1: it all. You don't have to choose. Yeah, um, but
Speaker 1: you've got to have those open and honest conversations about it.
Speaker 1: Actually actually says the sweetest thing all time. She says
Speaker 1: that she gets a little sad every night because it
Speaker 1: means one less day with me, which is the cutest
Speaker 1: thing ever and if marry her, wait, you already did, ye.
Speaker 1: I was an idiot for a while and I've been
Speaker 1: luckily came to my senses. But I think, and of
Speaker 1: course I feel the exact same way towards her. But
Speaker 1: I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel the
Speaker 1: exact same way towards my parents, my sister, and the
Speaker 1: people are close with, especially as my parents get older, um,
Speaker 1: and they're, you know, in their sixties, and it's like, damn,
Speaker 1: you know, if we're here for two or three more years,
Speaker 1: that means they're in there, you know, mid to upper sixties.
Speaker 1: And these are things that I again, I try to
Speaker 1: just live in the moment and not be concerned with
Speaker 1: those things. But of course they're just first and foremost
Speaker 1: because we're so far away. But anyway, so I think
Speaker 1: that's the biggest flown relationship. Another great example of not
Speaker 1: having a family being better in this case. No, ever,
Speaker 1: I don't have to worry about my parents getting old.
Speaker 1: Close with your brothers, Yeah, sure, my brothers, they're just
Speaker 1: saying to me basically essentially. Anyway, So let's me go
Speaker 1: on to the third one. The third one is what
Speaker 1: is the one thing you would like your partner to
Speaker 1: work on. I've got a laundry list. Careful now they're
Speaker 1: gonna be listening. She squeezes her toothpaste from the front
Speaker 1: of the two savage squeeze from the butt of the
Speaker 1: top paste. You know, she puts the tooth the toilet
Speaker 1: paper on the roll where the rolls under and staid over. Unbelievable. Nope. Um,
Speaker 1: it's just a lot of small things like that. Really,
Speaker 1: that's all she could really work on. That's when that's
Speaker 1: when you know, Yeah, you just moved in with someone
Speaker 1: where your biggest flowers on the toothpaste, the toilet man
Speaker 1: a huge man that under rolled. How how do you live?
Speaker 1: Like right? Like connections. There's a good thing because if
Speaker 1: you think that's okay, then there's some other things that
Speaker 1: you probably think okay that I'm not cool. Where the
Speaker 1: doctor gets it, man, he just gets it. And when
Speaker 1: I used to make the bed, Ashley would come in
Speaker 1: afterwards and start straining the bed out and I didn't. God,
Speaker 1: that would maybe some guys don't. We cannot do a
Speaker 1: good enough job that's able, Yeah, yours? What was the
Speaker 1: question was one thing you want your partner to work
Speaker 1: on I think to bounce off Dean's discussion about being
Speaker 1: an introvert. Actually, I love being with Ashley, but she
Speaker 1: is very much of a dependent where she could be
Speaker 1: with seven and never get tired of me. And I
Speaker 1: don't get tired of Ashley, but I do think there
Speaker 1: are times where I need to be Like even I'll
Speaker 1: go so we have like a little office where I
Speaker 1: have my Xbox, so I'll go and like play a
Speaker 1: video game and then literally like fifteen minutes in Jared like, baby,
Speaker 1: I need I need at least just give. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: that's probably the one thing she could work on and
Speaker 1: just you know, just be you give you like just
Speaker 1: skin houry, just to recompress. Well, and it goes back
Speaker 1: to the thing you're looking for, right certainty, that's what
Speaker 1: she's looking for. He's still there, He's still into me
Speaker 1: and this and this is still cool and so you
Speaker 1: just it's just it's just ways to reassure her of that.
Speaker 1: You know. It's like when it's like if you have
Speaker 1: a toddler and once they can kind of walk around
Speaker 1: and leave the room, they'll walk out of the room,
Speaker 1: but then they'll peek right back. The mature you're still there,
Speaker 1: so the same kind of difference in your job, but
Speaker 1: you still still here. Still Yeah, doctors, thank you so
Speaker 1: much for coming in. UM, that segment went on a
Speaker 1: lot longer than right. Good. We can, honest you talk
Speaker 1: to you forever and ever. But for our listeners out there,
Speaker 1: if you want to follow doctor Ish, go to his
Speaker 1: Instagram page Doctor Underscore Ish, Underscore Major, or be sure
Speaker 1: to check him out on Marriage boot Camp, Reality Stars
Speaker 1: Absolute When is that there? Season premiere is this Thursday
Speaker 1: at ten pm on we TVAZ hip Hop boot Camp
Speaker 1: All hip Hop House this time. Okay, great, so that's
Speaker 1: not the one that Caitlin and I are going to
Speaker 1: be I would love to check back in with you.
Speaker 1: It's all right, welcome back. Dr Ish has left the studio,
Speaker 1: but we do have some email questions. We have a
Speaker 1: video question we do before we get to tell you
Speaker 1: that I'm concerned about Jared Mark has a Jared question
Speaker 1: just because and this has come up before. I believe
Speaker 1: actually brought this up before, and as well as you
Speaker 1: brought this up before, I am concerned. I feel like
Speaker 1: you desperately went out of Los Angeles. UM. It's definitely
Speaker 1: a topic of conversation between Ashley and I, I wouldn't
Speaker 1: say desperately because of I love this. I love coming
Speaker 1: here in studio and recording. It's only once a week,
Speaker 1: so it's you know, obviously consistent. Uh. And then I
Speaker 1: also host h I do other hosting like I l
Speaker 1: A presents opportunities that just other parts of the country don't,
Speaker 1: which are awesome being able to do some of the
Speaker 1: things we had to do, including going to movie premiers,
Speaker 1: hosting things of that nature. But man, it's just an
Speaker 1: exhausting town to live in. I miss home. I missed
Speaker 1: the convenience of home. I missed my family, miss my friends.
Speaker 1: And I feel like I'm strongly from you. Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm I feel like I'm my worst version here and
Speaker 1: I wish I could be a better version of myself.
Speaker 1: And I find myself more confident and comfortable around um
Speaker 1: back home, probably just because it's you know, I'm so
Speaker 1: comfortable there between the people that I know, they're the places,
Speaker 1: the place you know that I've lived, grown up, so
Speaker 1: on and so forth. Um, So I missed that aspect
Speaker 1: of it, and Ashley can see it too. I think
Speaker 1: actually sees a different level of happiness from me. Whenever
Speaker 1: I'm home, and I think it hurts her too to
Speaker 1: see that, like I am a better version of myself
Speaker 1: depending on the location, which is sad but also true.
Speaker 1: So it is exhausting here, and it's it's it's a
Speaker 1: difficult place to live. What would you do there? Assuming
Speaker 1: the podcast doesn't transfer, which I don't know why I couldn't.
Speaker 1: Half of our hosts live in different cities. But let's
Speaker 1: say you couldn't do the podcast and you couldn't do
Speaker 1: the Instagram thing anymore, what do you see your life
Speaker 1: being like? Well, I think that's why the Instagram thing
Speaker 1: concerns me so much, because ideally I would love to
Speaker 1: open up my own bar. But the only way that's
Speaker 1: possible is if like we get to do this for hopefully,
Speaker 1: like do you more years? Maybe that's kind of like
Speaker 1: timeline actually, and I put on it, like to really
Speaker 1: have seed money to not only like you know, invest
Speaker 1: in the things we want to invest in, which is
Speaker 1: a future family house, things of that nature, but also
Speaker 1: have enough money to really open up a bar with
Speaker 1: only one or two other investors so I can really
Speaker 1: own and operate it. Because I've worked in hospitality for
Speaker 1: you know, gotten twelve years or something like that. So
Speaker 1: I have a good grasp of how to run uh
Speaker 1: an industry like that. And also, um, I have an
Speaker 1: idea of what I want to do, So the opportunity
Speaker 1: to implement that and and really have creative control over
Speaker 1: is something that would be great. So I think that
Speaker 1: would be the end goal again on you know, fortunately
Speaker 1: and unfortunately it is very dependent on on on us
Speaker 1: continuing to do what we do now. Uh so's the
Speaker 1: name of the bar? Uh So, I really like the
Speaker 1: name her. Ashley's mom's name is Audrey, so I love
Speaker 1: the idea of naming naming it Audrey's. I really like
Speaker 1: this barnet. My mom's name is Nancy, which I also
Speaker 1: think is adorable, but I my mom knows this. I
Speaker 1: like Audrey's better, Like, Hey, you want to go to
Speaker 1: audrey tonight. I think that's a really cute. And so
Speaker 1: I would love it to be more of like a
Speaker 1: coffee shop martini bar that I'm I'm kind of changing it.
Speaker 1: It might become more of a sports bar. I don't
Speaker 1: really know. But um there's a bar back home called
Speaker 1: main Street Coffee that I love, and it's a coffee
Speaker 1: shop slash Martini bar that's very small and intimate, fireplace, couches, chairs,
Speaker 1: very uh Mediterranean looking, and it's really like just not
Speaker 1: only a great date spot, but just a great spot
Speaker 1: to go and chill and talk and really just a
Speaker 1: great great area to really you just feel comfortable in it.
Speaker 1: So that's what I would like to open up. But
Speaker 1: you know, New England is also a huge sports market
Speaker 1: and I also love sports bars, so the idea of
Speaker 1: do mean that as well is very intriguing. So we'll see.
Speaker 1: But of course, you know that's like the ultimate goal,
Speaker 1: open up Audrey's and then open up audrey too, like
Speaker 1: in thet Yeah, there were or something, and I think
Speaker 1: actually the recent Bachelor news which was like Kendall and
Speaker 1: Joe broke that really hit home, I think for Ashley
Speaker 1: and I because from everything we know of it and
Speaker 1: I'm sure there is more to it, but the main
Speaker 1: reason they broke up with location because he just he
Speaker 1: was like, I need to go back to Chicago. I
Speaker 1: can't do it out here. You can't do it. So
Speaker 1: you're saying it sounds like you and actually might be
Speaker 1: happening to call it quits pretty soon. Yeah, we're probably
Speaker 1: gonna get a horse over. Of course you could be
Speaker 1: long distance. No, we would never. We actually has toyed
Speaker 1: with the idea of being bi coastal, but it's also
Speaker 1: just expensive to try to be bi coastal, and I'd
Speaker 1: rather save our money and just and surely not suck
Speaker 1: it up. I mean, I'm the luckiest guy live to
Speaker 1: be able to people would beg to live out here,
Speaker 1: you know, in Hollywood and Los Angeles, nice weather year round.
Speaker 1: You know it's I I I leave the gym and
Speaker 1: literally the Walk of Fame is right there, you know,
Speaker 1: I forget. I remember I was on the phone with
Speaker 1: my sister one time and I was like, oh, I'm
Speaker 1: driving down Sunset I'm going to this thing. And I
Speaker 1: was like, I'm driving down Sunset Bath. You know. I
Speaker 1: I think I maybe don't appreciate it enough. I've lived
Speaker 1: here twenty years. I still have these moments. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: you're driving down Sunset Bovard like there's Rodero Drive, and
Speaker 1: it's like, damn, that is when I really think about it.
Speaker 1: That is crazy. And and to my family back home,
Speaker 1: you know, they think it's the coolest thing. People save
Speaker 1: their money all year to come visit here. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: then I just think you live in the wrong point
Speaker 1: of town. I think you need to go more west,
Speaker 1: like beach area. Gods, I don't know if I could
Speaker 1: do Santa Monica. I don't see. I think maybe you
Speaker 1: should be more suburban. Maybe it would feel more like
Speaker 1: home if you were out in you know, a Gura
Speaker 1: or someplace. I like suburban areas, like I would love
Speaker 1: to live in Pasadena. Are you a pastt I'm Passadena adjacent, Glendale,
Speaker 1: Monrovia Trader Joe's. Oh that sounds fantastics, right, baby, and
Speaker 1: the gem of the foothills very nice. Is that why
Speaker 1: you want to live in more suburban area? Yeah, it
Speaker 1: feels like maybe are out there. It's great and it's
Speaker 1: not far from anything. It's really not far from anything.
Speaker 1: I to let to myself all the time. It's very
Speaker 1: close then where all the action is. Yeah, seeing yourself
Speaker 1: that or No, it's great. There's a lot of great
Speaker 1: suburban areas of Los Angeles where you can still have
Speaker 1: that l A. I didn't realize that. I didn't realize
Speaker 1: that when I got here, I was where we're gonna
Speaker 1: raise kids. It's actually some pretty great places to raise kids.
Speaker 1: I was driving the other day in Burbank and there
Speaker 1: there is areas of bird Bank where it was just
Speaker 1: it was trees and grass, and you're like, oh wow,
Speaker 1: this feels like a neighborhood, and uh yeah, you don't
Speaker 1: get that. The problem is actually is is because of
Speaker 1: a lot of things we do, actually feels like we
Speaker 1: need to be more central in which I get. But
Speaker 1: at the same time, if it is going to bring
Speaker 1: us a little bit more happiness, I think it is.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I should actually also convinced that if
Speaker 1: it's not close to my family, it's not gonna matter,
Speaker 1: so which I'm not whole fully convinced of. But why
Speaker 1: don't we to get your parents to move out to
Speaker 1: Los Angeles? No, they will never have it. My dad
Speaker 1: would lose his mind. Oh my god, the traffic. He
Speaker 1: can't literally he's in traffic for four minutes in Cranson,
Speaker 1: Rhode Island. I mean he is losing his mind. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I get that, But also just tell him to come
Speaker 1: out here for like an extended amount of time. Let's
Speaker 1: see if there's any spike in your happiness. It's just
Speaker 1: like you gotta start a b testing things, you know,
Speaker 1: Is it that you're missing your family. Is it that
Speaker 1: you're missing the location? Is it the combination of the two?
Speaker 1: Is it? What exactly is it? So maybe like I
Speaker 1: haven't come out like spent like a month in Los Angeles.
Speaker 1: It's definitely the combo of me both of it. But
Speaker 1: but yeah, I mean, and there are aspects of Los
Speaker 1: Angeles that are fantastic, just like any other part of
Speaker 1: the world in their aspects that I just don't enjoy it.
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, I hate to say it, but
Speaker 1: I just don't see it working out between you guys.
Speaker 1: I hope it does. I'm really glad Dean was a
Speaker 1: groomsman in my way it does. I just don't see it.
Speaker 1: I just don't. Do you have any Do you have any?
Speaker 1: Uh question? The other night, Scrubbing In with Becca Antonio
Speaker 1: had their first ever live podcast up in San Francisco
Speaker 1: and it went very well from all reports, And so
Speaker 1: he has a video that we got from a listener
Speaker 1: named his name is Helendada. Helenda has a question for you,
Speaker 1: and here it is from Helenda. Thank you for leather Jack.
Speaker 1: Thank you for taking some time before we play this
Speaker 1: to make the Scrubbing In live podcasts a little bit
Speaker 1: about help. I suck it, dude. I'm telling you. The
Speaker 1: almost famous live podcast was a lot about chant going
Speaker 1: and everything that really means a lot. Okay, my question
Speaker 1: is single, what am I doing wrong? I know I
Speaker 1: build the balls, but what am I doing wrong? Why
Speaker 1: do you build the balls? I don't know what. What's
Speaker 1: some advice? Well, a lot of info to go off? Yeah,
Speaker 1: Tore you were there to meet here, it's some advice
Speaker 1: that you and maybe have for her, because I don't
Speaker 1: want my advice. She wants a males perspective. No, I know,
Speaker 1: but I think we just need a little bit more
Speaker 1: information about Helenda, who she is, what she likes, what
Speaker 1: she dislikes, where she eats, maybe where she shops, like
Speaker 1: those types of things. Do you have any information you
Speaker 1: could help us? I do not, but I will say
Speaker 1: that you meet those people who right off the bat
Speaker 1: you just generally know are good humans of them, and
Speaker 1: she was one of those. And you could tell that.
Speaker 1: People who build up walls, you know, we all have those,
Speaker 1: But like, where do we go to break that down?
Speaker 1: How do you start the first step to be vulnerable
Speaker 1: towards someone or let someone in? You know, It's like
Speaker 1: I think that's what she kind of wants to know.
Speaker 1: I think had a lot of good Sorry, I was
Speaker 1: just gonna say. Let me say, if she's listening to
Speaker 1: this podcast, she's obviously a good human being. That's a
Speaker 1: great point. She's very pretty, she's where, she's well dressed,
Speaker 1: and I've spoken to her a number of times. She's
Speaker 1: she's very cool. Here's what I know about her. She
Speaker 1: likes to travel. She works in radio in the San
Speaker 1: Jose area. Um. She she is a very passionate human
Speaker 1: and she has a lot, a lot of love to give,
Speaker 1: and she has a song in her heart. I think
Speaker 1: a song in her heart. What does that mean? Sex music? Okay,
Speaker 1: I think that she could take Dr Issue's advice pretty
Speaker 1: thoroughly when he says things about like do the things
Speaker 1: that spark joy and you. I don't obviously we don't
Speaker 1: know about that. But maybe she's building up those walls
Speaker 1: because she's got like some insecurities, because she's unable to
Speaker 1: pursue and try the things that she's always yearned to.
Speaker 1: And that could open her up a little bit and
Speaker 1: allow her to be a little more vulnerable with other people.
Speaker 1: Um And then that you know, that will just naturally
Speaker 1: attract guys. Thirty three still pretty young. Let's be clear
Speaker 1: about that too, she said, thirty three single, I don't
Speaker 1: think that's that big of a deal. Like, you know,
Speaker 1: we have friends in our thirties who are still single,
Speaker 1: and they're they're thriving and doing their best. Oh, I
Speaker 1: I agree. I think it's very normal to be in
Speaker 1: your mid thirties and single nowadays. I also think that
Speaker 1: she could actively probably do a good job of uh,
Speaker 1: consciously working on bringing her walls down anytime she's meeting
Speaker 1: with someone, not being afraid to ask them out, or
Speaker 1: if they want to do something with her, making the
Speaker 1: first move, so on and so forth, or just even
Speaker 1: being willing to uh. I think a lot of people
Speaker 1: who build walls up, they immediately kind of run away
Speaker 1: from a relationship that starts turning good. So I think
Speaker 1: being aware of that and actively trying to work through
Speaker 1: that with whoever partner she's on a date with, but
Speaker 1: also a good step in the right direction. But also
Speaker 1: stop saying it, stop anouncing it to the world. I
Speaker 1: feel like the more she says those types of things,
Speaker 1: the more she's like willing it to do. Like positive
Speaker 1: affirmation sort of thing like she's willing it into existence.
Speaker 1: So maybe like work on it, but maybe like work
Speaker 1: on it quietly, you know what I mean, Like or
Speaker 1: just don't don't say it that I don't say it
Speaker 1: out loud, but in the moment that you know a
Speaker 1: wall is going up, recognize it, don't say it out
Speaker 1: and just barrel through it and help I suck it, dive,
Speaker 1: Help I suck live podcast. We're gonna hopefully have Helenda
Speaker 1: there and maybe we can check in with her that
Speaker 1: we got our producer right here. So sorry, I got
Speaker 1: a phone called this is ridiculous. It suck Army. We
Speaker 1: need to have a live podcast. We're going to figure
Speaker 1: this out. We're gonna have one. We should do you
Speaker 1: understand the energy in the room that will be happening
Speaker 1: with a help I secon dating live podcast. There's going
Speaker 1: to be contained. It's gonna be so much swag. It's
Speaker 1: going to be off the chart. There were chance at
Speaker 1: describing in not like when everyone's in their seats, but
Speaker 1: in the hallway they'd be like oh, and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's the army, And I just realized, I'm like, why
Speaker 1: is that normal for me to stay? Now? Mark? Do
Speaker 1: you have any email or anything I do. Cassidy has
Speaker 1: a question for you, Dean. She's Minnesota. She says, Dean,
Speaker 1: I have no idea how to word this. Will bear
Speaker 1: with me. You and I have a lot of weird similarities,
Speaker 1: but not in the best way. I've really liked listening
Speaker 1: to you talk about how you've handled your trauma and
Speaker 1: your outlook on being different if you will. When I
Speaker 1: was sixteen, my best friend passed. When I was three,
Speaker 1: my father passed. I have a brother who's five years
Speaker 1: younger than I am. That I feel like it's relatable
Speaker 1: to you in your story. So my question is what
Speaker 1: advice do you have for young man want to come
Speaker 1: with the handling depression and emptiness from that type of loss.
Speaker 1: Do you have any suggestions or things that helped you
Speaker 1: get ready to heal from your loss so that helped
Speaker 1: pull you out of that and accept it. It's a
Speaker 1: heavy question, pretty heavy. Yeah, I really don't think I
Speaker 1: have much advice to get. When I look back on
Speaker 1: my like late teens, early twenties, I was pretty devious.
Speaker 1: I would you know, I drank a lot with my friends.
Speaker 1: I was at quintessential called kid that would more or less,
Speaker 1: get blacked out on weekends and like not really have
Speaker 1: a care in the world other than like where is
Speaker 1: the next party. So when I was that age, when
Speaker 1: I was going dealing with all that kind of loss,
Speaker 1: like I wouldn't say I was depressed, but I was
Speaker 1: definitely lost as a human being. And I think that
Speaker 1: maybe I was using that type of stuff to mask
Speaker 1: that type of a depression or whatever it might be.
Speaker 1: But again, I look back at those times and I
Speaker 1: don't necessarily think that I was depressed, but I would
Speaker 1: never I would never tell someone to use my experience
Speaker 1: as a blueprint to get through it all because, like
Speaker 1: I said, like I was, I was such a I
Speaker 1: was such a dickhead when I was you know, eighteen
Speaker 1: to seven, basically I was. And I guess when I
Speaker 1: handled that kind of stuff, like, yeah, I had a good,
Speaker 1: cruel core group of friends, and although like I didn't
Speaker 1: talk to them about what I was going through emotionally
Speaker 1: or whatever, I knew that I could kind of like
Speaker 1: lean on them to maybe get my mind off of
Speaker 1: things or you know whatever whatever I needed for them.
Speaker 1: So my advice to this person is find a solid
Speaker 1: friend group. You know, maybe don't like unload all of
Speaker 1: your baggage onto them or anything like that. But just
Speaker 1: you know, make sure that you're around people that want
Speaker 1: the best for you and and and wish you know,
Speaker 1: you wish you as well as as well as the
Speaker 1: possibly can. But again, like when I look back to
Speaker 1: that time, I don't think that the way that I
Speaker 1: got through it was really admirable in any sort of way,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Did you ever go to
Speaker 1: therapy as a teenager or I went once when I
Speaker 1: was like fifteen after my mom died, but I hated it.
Speaker 1: I don't think that you really get anything out of
Speaker 1: therapy unless you elect to go on your own accord,
Speaker 1: and I did that obviously last year when I was
Speaker 1: twenty six. I think I talked about on this podcast
Speaker 1: a little bit. Um. What I'm saying is, would you
Speaker 1: maybe advise or give advice if he should only go
Speaker 1: to therapy if he thinks he could benefit from into therapy.
Speaker 1: Therapy sucks if you don't want to be there, you know,
Speaker 1: like if if Cassidy, who is the sister um and
Speaker 1: her brother is dealing with this thing, if Cassie is
Speaker 1: the one that's like, hey, listen, like I want you
Speaker 1: to go to therapy. I think that you know you'll
Speaker 1: benefit from it, And he doesn't want to go, and
Speaker 1: he goes he's not gonna get anything from it, and
Speaker 1: I think, do you think she should just suggest it
Speaker 1: and then let him decide. I also don't think that's
Speaker 1: the best idea either. One of my biggest pet peeves
Speaker 1: is when you see someone, like even if someone on
Speaker 1: the Bachelor or someone going through something, and then you'll
Speaker 1: see like a complete stranger. And obviously Cassie is not
Speaker 1: a complete stranger to brother, but like when people are
Speaker 1: like saying like, oh, go to therapy, like seek out therapy.
Speaker 1: I think you'd benefit from therapy, it's like it's kind
Speaker 1: of a knock in a sense, and I don't think
Speaker 1: that that's going to really spark interest in that person
Speaker 1: going to therapy. But coming from Cassidy like I'm a
Speaker 1: little too stubborn. Like if someone would have come to
Speaker 1: me and we're like, hey, I think you should go
Speaker 1: to therapy for this, whatever the reason is, I probably
Speaker 1: be like, you don't know me any better than you
Speaker 1: know so true, I completely understand where you're coming from.
Speaker 1: I think it's more reflection on society that it's considered
Speaker 1: a knock if someone says, hey, I think therapy might
Speaker 1: be healthy for you. I just think that it's not
Speaker 1: any again, different situation because Cassie and him are brother
Speaker 1: and sister. But when people come and say, like, you
Speaker 1: should get therapy, they're stranger who yet an idiot who
Speaker 1: says that it also could be a little lazy, Like
Speaker 1: it's not they don't. They just like you need therapy,
Speaker 1: like they don't really know your situation completely thoroughly, and
Speaker 1: they're trying to be helpful of course. But that's why
Speaker 1: I think it's different for her sister to talk to
Speaker 1: her brother about it. Like, I'm sure if one of
Speaker 1: your brothers talked to you and said, hey, I think
Speaker 1: you know, maybe I should do this, maybe you should
Speaker 1: do this for just the trauma that we've been through.
Speaker 1: I think it's different than certainly someone on Night two
Speaker 1: of The Bachelor coming up and saying, hey, you need therapy, bro. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: one thing one thing I did when I was younger
Speaker 1: that I think that Cassie's brother could maybe benefit from
Speaker 1: is I did it a few times. I didn't do
Speaker 1: it as often as looking back as I should have.
Speaker 1: But like it's good. It's it's okay to like sit
Speaker 1: there and just think about how sad you are. Like
Speaker 1: you can sit there and be upset about something and
Speaker 1: don't like try to escape that thought. Like at least
Speaker 1: like think about it, internalize it, and process it, and
Speaker 1: allow yourself to process it. If you're crying, Like especially
Speaker 1: for the guy, you know, he's twenty years old at
Speaker 1: this point, it's like it kind of sucks being a
Speaker 1: twenty year old guy that's gonna be crying, right, But
Speaker 1: if you're like maybe alone in your room or even
Speaker 1: if you're you know, you need to like step away
Speaker 1: from people and like take a second and just like
Speaker 1: internalize it, process it, allow yourself to feel that way
Speaker 1: because then later on, like you're gonna have a bunch
Speaker 1: of better time handling it. And don't be afraid. It's like, yes,
Speaker 1: distractions are okay too. I think like sports is a
Speaker 1: is a good distraction, especially when you're that age. Um,
Speaker 1: I took the root of both sports and partying. I would,
Speaker 1: like I said, I would never suggested to go out
Speaker 1: and get drunk to handle your with your depression. But
Speaker 1: um that's my main advice is I internalize it, and
Speaker 1: that's something that uh I did a few times when
Speaker 1: I was that age, but I wish I did more
Speaker 1: of because I think it's beneficial to like dwell on
Speaker 1: that stuff a little bit. Yeah. The only reason I suggested,
Speaker 1: maybe Casside, Casside, you're talking about the door brother from
Speaker 1: an outside or listening to that Dean obviously knows better
Speaker 1: than I, um, just because when you said you felt
Speaker 1: like you couldn't talk to your friends about it, and
Speaker 1: then even suggested to Cassidy's they're about like, get your friends,
Speaker 1: don't unload all your baggage. But do you think from
Speaker 1: your own personal experience being someone in this position, that
Speaker 1: it would be healthier for you to unload your baggage
Speaker 1: to someone to get it off your chest. I can
Speaker 1: only speak from my experience, and before it's it's actually
Speaker 1: kind of embarrassing is because before I went on Bachelorette
Speaker 1: and before my wonder one with Rachel, when I like
Speaker 1: talked about my mom passing when I was fifteen, and
Speaker 1: obviously I have a bunch of other close friends that
Speaker 1: I've died when I was a kid too, Like I
Speaker 1: never talked about it, so even like some of my
Speaker 1: closest friends didn't know that. I didn't have a mom,
Speaker 1: you know, like that type of thing. And I think
Speaker 1: that's why I say, don't unload all your baggage, but
Speaker 1: you can still obviously like inform them of what's what
Speaker 1: you're going through. But what I did personally was I
Speaker 1: just kind of I didn't tell anyone. No one knew
Speaker 1: about it, uh, and it like kind of made for
Speaker 1: some awkward tension later on. But obviously, like once I
Speaker 1: started opening up about it and sharing it more and
Speaker 1: more with the people that were closer to me, the
Speaker 1: better I felt about it, the better I think the
Speaker 1: closer we were able to connect, and like obviously we
Speaker 1: were all able to deal with it together. But personal experience,
Speaker 1: I didn't speak enough about it. And I think that
Speaker 1: obviously you can kind of gauge personally how much you
Speaker 1: should be sharing, but uh, you know, maybe start lightly
Speaker 1: and then like as you find people that you can
Speaker 1: like confidently speak to and figure that out with like
Speaker 1: obviously uh, confiding them a little bit more. But I
Speaker 1: don't know, that's a that's a that's a heavy, heavy question. Well,
Speaker 1: I thought your advice about allowing yourself to feel it
Speaker 1: and experience the emotion I think that's actually really good advice.
Speaker 1: And what Dr Is said too. You know, as kids,
Speaker 1: as young boys growing up, like we're we're taught to
Speaker 1: act tough and like push through. I wanted to ask him,
Speaker 1: what is the right how do you handle that? Because
Speaker 1: when when my daughter's falling skin their knee, I'm more
Speaker 1: of a your fine, everything's cool, like it's okay, it's okay,
Speaker 1: we're I think that my wife doesn't do that, and
Speaker 1: so I think it makes me look like kind of
Speaker 1: a jerk when when my wife's like, oh you poor
Speaker 1: thing came here and I'm like, you're fine, get up.
Speaker 1: It makes me feel like a jerk. But I feel
Speaker 1: like in the long run, they'll be better off if
Speaker 1: they're able to shake off minor things like that. Well,
Speaker 1: I think bank, I didn't tell you you're fine, get up.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like it's a skin knee,
Speaker 1: you're fine. I mean from an outsider, that seems pretty okay,
Speaker 1: Like it's not like a traumatic experience happened and you
Speaker 1: said you're fine, don't talk about it. Your fine. I mean,
Speaker 1: there's a scrapeknee, I'm sure, like you said your daughter
Speaker 1: broke her ankle. You're not gonna a totally different situation.
Speaker 1: That was a different situation when when I was in
Speaker 1: high school. My girlfriend at the time, she was a babysitter,
Speaker 1: you know, as most high school girls are, and she
Speaker 1: was like a tomboy, and she was like, you know
Speaker 1: super I guess I didn't really know how to put it,
Speaker 1: but she when she would babysit, uh, the kid would
Speaker 1: like fall. It's like a three or four year old kid.
Speaker 1: Obviously your your daughter is a little older than that,
Speaker 1: but uh. And every time that they would fall and
Speaker 1: hurt themselves, she would like, instead of like get up
Speaker 1: your fine or like, oh, let's like brush off, she
Speaker 1: would like cheer them on and be like that was
Speaker 1: so sick, Like that was the most awesome thing. And
Speaker 1: then they would jump up and they'd be like whoa,
Speaker 1: that was really cool evening, you know. So as I
Speaker 1: saw that, that's how I've always kind of decided I
Speaker 1: would raise my kids, like if they fall and hurt themselves,
Speaker 1: you just like cheer them on and be like, dude,
Speaker 1: that was epic positive reinforcement with pain. Yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: they don't really know what, they don't know anybody. They
Speaker 1: just like they're they're reacting to how you react. So
Speaker 1: if you react like, oh my god, are you okay?
Speaker 1: Oh I'm gonna cry, because that's what they That's what
Speaker 1: I was gonna say. I've seen with friends like it
Speaker 1: all depends on the parents reaction, Like if a kid
Speaker 1: falls down and like, oh my god, are you okay?
Speaker 1: And then the kid will start just seeing their reaction
Speaker 1: and compared to when they say, okay, here we go,
Speaker 1: we're up, we're fine, and then they'll be fine to
Speaker 1: shake it off. I think it's a very good skill
Speaker 1: to have in life because you're gonna chake a lot
Speaker 1: of stuff off. And when you're at age like nothing
Speaker 1: really like you're a foot and half tall, you're falling
Speaker 1: on the ground. You know what I mean? You go
Speaker 1: on that far right. I didn't want to talk about
Speaker 1: this. This This was sent in by somebody in Marianne who
Speaker 1: got dumped via text, which I think we're anti anti
Speaker 1: the text to dump. Sure, I think we're past that.
Speaker 1: I was gonna read it to you because she wants
Speaker 1: to know why guys sends stuff like this. She says,
Speaker 1: Hey Maryanne. He says, hey, marry Anne. I hope you
Speaker 1: had a good weekend. Sorry, I was so m I A.
Speaker 1: My work retreat was fun, but this bronchitis was kicking
Speaker 1: my butt. Anyway. I wanted to reach out to you
Speaker 1: because I think it's probably best for me that I
Speaker 1: take a step back and focus on things other than
Speaker 1: a relationship. Truth is, I'm a bit overwhelmed at the
Speaker 1: moment upon realizing my next three week agend it's not
Speaker 1: until March fourteenth. Emoji with the sick face. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't know how that fits. I'm not sure how that happened,
Speaker 1: but with me being so busy, it does not seem
Speaker 1: fair to only be able to half heartedly pursue a
Speaker 1: relationship with someone. I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to know
Speaker 1: you and think you are very attractive, smart, funny, and
Speaker 1: of extreme quality. I just don't see myself being able
Speaker 1: to take the time to pursue you the way I
Speaker 1: want to or the way I think you deserve. I
Speaker 1: hope this makes sense. I would love to remain friends,
Speaker 1: and who knows what will happen in the future. Not
Speaker 1: sure if you think I oh and quotes you an explanation,
Speaker 1: but I personally feel like we had enough of a
Speaker 1: connection and wanted to be forthright and clear with you
Speaker 1: so that there was no gray area. Perhaps when it's warmer,
Speaker 1: you can teach me tennis. I hope you enjoy slash,
Speaker 1: enjoyed your family time. What's the douche level on this one?
Speaker 1: Pretty high? It's pretty so I think. So I kind
Speaker 1: of want to just be a contrarian though, and like
Speaker 1: we should fight over this, so I'll take Let me
Speaker 1: say I'm I'm anti this guy for the sake of
Speaker 1: the argument. Let's let's go Okay, let's find out how
Speaker 1: long have they been dating. That's the biggest question, mar,
Speaker 1: because I'm actually not against a text message ending things.
Speaker 1: If it was one or two dates, Judging the sheer
Speaker 1: length of this message, I'm going to say it was
Speaker 1: a while, it was more than one or two dates,
Speaker 1: or maybe he was just trying to be Overlea. Now,
Speaker 1: this is at least a ten date minimum length text.
Speaker 1: You can't determine that. I object. Your forensic analysis proved
Speaker 1: that they've been on at least ten dates. Also, they're
Speaker 1: on amoji level too. He can send emojis and text
Speaker 1: that's pretty. You know, that's pretty. That is a level
Speaker 1: to achieve. So I disagree. I feel like guys tory
Speaker 1: can do. Guys send emojis to you all the time
Speaker 1: that you don't really know. Well. I think when you're
Speaker 1: sending a breakup text, you're like trying to make light
Speaker 1: of it. So I don't think you could really put
Speaker 1: that as a level of how Yeah, he's been like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm so what about your football point? Does he send emojis?
Speaker 1: He definitely doesn't, I think, so I send so many
Speaker 1: so I black out all the others. Yeah, I'm a
Speaker 1: big emoji spporter as well. I also think that he
Speaker 1: is dating another woman and he is trying to let
Speaker 1: her down quote unquote gently. Where are you getting this
Speaker 1: information from? Um? I just think that he was a
Speaker 1: little too overly complimentary. You're so attractive, funny, smart, and
Speaker 1: of extreme quality, but I just don't have any time,
Speaker 1: you know? Is that him keeping her on the bench
Speaker 1: a little bit? Like? Probably? The thing is this guy
Speaker 1: definitely has time, like if he wants to, like you,
Speaker 1: don't I agree with Like, if you want to have
Speaker 1: time for someone, you'll make time for them. But all
Speaker 1: this person is doing is like, look, he could be like, look,
Speaker 1: I'm busy. I might not be able to see you
Speaker 1: very much, but I would still like to talk to you.
Speaker 1: That's like, that's how you would maintain the relationship. But
Speaker 1: in my opinion, Jake is dating another woman and he
Speaker 1: likes that prospect a little bit more. Maybe she's of
Speaker 1: a little bit more extreme quality, and he's doing her
Speaker 1: best to let Maryan down lightly here. I don't think
Speaker 1: he sucks because I'm trying allending this guy. You know,
Speaker 1: I'll take it. Would you rather be ghost it or
Speaker 1: do you have a weird text that you're like, at
Speaker 1: least I know it's like the guy like owned up,
Speaker 1: like a phone call. Maybe maybe not even a phone call.
Speaker 1: I think I would actually prefer a text. Just shoot
Speaker 1: me a text, let me think about it, or not
Speaker 1: respond like the message move on. But like you're not
Speaker 1: getting ghosted, And if you're on the phone, you would
Speaker 1: have been like, oh that's cool. No, yeah, totally fine
Speaker 1: to get it and get it. I'm busy too. We're
Speaker 1: giving you a text. It's a cop out. Take it.
Speaker 1: When the bar that you're comparing everything too is the
Speaker 1: one that's in the dirt, everything is obviously gonna look
Speaker 1: a little bit better than everything is better than She's right.
Speaker 1: Ghosting is so common. Right now, he's literally owning up that.
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm not here. I understand that ghosting is common.
Speaker 1: That doesn't mean ghosting isn't Ghosting is the worst thing
Speaker 1: you could possibly do when you break up with someone,
Speaker 1: right Just because this is one step up from that,
Speaker 1: it doesn't make it an okay thing to do, not
Speaker 1: a one step up. He's clearly expressed guys don't talk
Speaker 1: about their emotions, and he's literally saying, hey, I'm really
Speaker 1: at capacity. But because you're breaking up with someone, you're
Speaker 1: not going to be like, hey, you kind of suck. Sorry,
Speaker 1: You're gonna be like, hey, I'm actually so sorry, Like
Speaker 1: I enjoyed her time, I really did it. Just it's
Speaker 1: all going to sound like BS when you're in a breakup,
Speaker 1: because you're like, screw you, you're breaking my heart. But
Speaker 1: like he's he's literally expressing that, like how many dates?
Speaker 1: How many dates do you get to the level where
Speaker 1: breakup text is ridiculous? Like, for example, if he did
Speaker 1: go on ten dates, do you think he should have
Speaker 1: texted her or called her or saw her in person
Speaker 1: and broke up with her then? Or like there's a
Speaker 1: right way to break up with someone. Can we just
Speaker 1: clear the air on that too, because if you're gonna call,
Speaker 1: it's still awkward. You're not gonna feel great. Like you're
Speaker 1: always going able to critique somebody's breakup, but if they're
Speaker 1: dating for three months, I think a text message is dumb.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it could maybe do a phone call,
Speaker 1: but I still would be like, okay, by you still
Speaker 1: feel weird of This guy is very complimentary. He has
Speaker 1: said that she is extreme quality, of extreme quality, written
Speaker 1: more funny, attractive. It's written like we put ten thousand
Speaker 1: like lame breakup text in you an ai that wrote
Speaker 1: its own. That's what it sounds like. That's exactly what
Speaker 1: I think too. I think that breakup texts are fine
Speaker 1: depending on the length of the relationship, right, but this guy,
Speaker 1: something about the length of the message really just irks me.
Speaker 1: Like he was he didn't want to he wanted to
Speaker 1: seem overly nice, right, and so that's why he was
Speaker 1: like overly descriptive out here. Just kicked my leg, he wrote,
Speaker 1: he wrote so much and tried to like over like
Speaker 1: he almost like over analyzed and over explained why he
Speaker 1: was trying to be breaking someone. No, No, I think
Speaker 1: I would rather honestly have the four paragraphs and like
Speaker 1: at least you feel a little guilty into it. Yeah, listen,
Speaker 1: if if they've been dating for long enough to where
Speaker 1: he feels like he needs to make her feel good
Speaker 1: about the breakup, he should have either called her or
Speaker 1: done it face to face. And the fact that he
Speaker 1: texts your proves that they've been dating longer than you think.
Speaker 1: The long text message. But he's too much of a
Speaker 1: coward to make that phone call, and he's making up excuses,
Speaker 1: Oh I'm busy until much fourteen. Oh, but you're so
Speaker 1: beautiful and of extreme quality, but I just don't think
Speaker 1: you're great for me right now one or two days
Speaker 1: and over the top be a text if he kind
Speaker 1: of just ghosted her, and then that would have been
Speaker 1: and everybody would have forgotten the situation. She's as great
Speaker 1: as he's making out text, he wouldn't be breaking up
Speaker 1: with her, and he's making the decision for her. He's saying,
Speaker 1: I don't think that you would appreciate me because I'm
Speaker 1: not going to be free until March fourteenth, and because
Speaker 1: of that, I'm breaking up with you. That's not very
Speaker 1: click at that. I don't like I wouldn't like that either.
Speaker 1: I'd be like, okay, don't throw that in. Would just
Speaker 1: what would you want to have them say that? Or
Speaker 1: him being fully honest and saying, well, I don't think
Speaker 1: we're I guess we're. Full honesty can be scarring, That's
Speaker 1: what I mean. You never go full honesty. I disagree.
Speaker 1: I think this guy sucks. Jake, you suck, Maryanne, You're
Speaker 1: better off without it. Let's not say the name. No,
Speaker 1: what says names right there? Story If you got this
Speaker 1: text from a guy, would you respond to it? Would
Speaker 1: you say, oh, yeah, I'm busy too, thanks by, I'd
Speaker 1: love to teach you tennis. Or would you just do
Speaker 1: a love That's that's the that's the cherry on top
Speaker 1: of the friendship right there. I think I'd feel like
Speaker 1: I think I would just say, hey, you know, good
Speaker 1: luck with all your work aspirations, and just like make
Speaker 1: it back in his like, if he wants to make
Speaker 1: it so corporate, then just take it corporate back. I
Speaker 1: would just like the message. I wouldn't even respond to it.
Speaker 1: Such a low and very Anne. When you see Jake
Speaker 1: post with his new Instagram boo in three months, look
Speaker 1: back at this podcast episode, and Dean and Mark will
Speaker 1: sit here saying we told you text us if that happens,
Speaker 1: you would just do the thumbs up in the corner
Speaker 1: and that's it. It's so dumb right now. I think
Speaker 1: that is the perfect response level here because I've had
Speaker 1: such a difficult time defending this guy. Honestly don't know
Speaker 1: he's not he said, not sure if I quote, oh
Speaker 1: you an explanation what listen. I'm not saying it was
Speaker 1: the perfect text, but at least he communicated to her
Speaker 1: that I have things going on and you don't line
Speaker 1: up with And who says of extreme quality? Is this
Speaker 1: like King of Scotland over here? I think it's a
Speaker 1: quality Listen at the end of the day, and you'd
Speaker 1: make a good wife one day. At the end of
Speaker 1: the day. It's an agree to disagree. Some people are
Speaker 1: right some people but we can all agree on is
Speaker 1: that the bar is so low for dudes nowadays that
Speaker 1: this actually clears it. And that's sad and totally trying
Speaker 1: to get to earlier too. What do you Mark says
Speaker 1: that it makes so upset it's because of his purple shirt.
Speaker 1: We would love to hear your opinions on this. Email
Speaker 1: us I suck at Dating at iHeart media dot com.
Speaker 1: Do you think Jake did the right thing by texting
Speaker 1: Maryanne this long breakup text or do you think it's
Speaker 1: a little shady? I personally think it was shady. And also,
Speaker 1: would you prefer a text message a phone call? Ghost like? Okay,
Speaker 1: obviously nobody's gonna want to Honestly, we're in this place.
Speaker 1: Nobody would want to have you sit down and be like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna buy Would you rather have a turd in
Speaker 1: your sandwich, expired bologna in your sandwich, or a nice
Speaker 1: Italian sandwich from so But obviously I'll take the Italian
Speaker 1: time if I have to eat the expired bologny. My
Speaker 1: point is just because the worst thing, just because it's
Speaker 1: better than the worst thing, doesn't make it a good thing.
Speaker 1: That's my point. It's very understandable and very Yeah, email
Speaker 1: us at I suck at Dating at iHeart media dot com.
Speaker 1: We would love to hear your take on this. Also,
Speaker 1: email us some of your weird breakup texts that you've received.
Speaker 1: Can we call this episode expired? Maloge is better than
Speaker 1: a turn too many words, A subway foot long is
Speaker 1: slightly better than ex email us I Sucky Dating at
Speaker 1: iHeart media dot com. We would love to hear from you,
Speaker 1: maybe some advice that you heard from dr Ish that
Speaker 1: you're gonna be willing to implement in your own relationship
Speaker 1: as well. Be sure to check him out on Marriage
Speaker 1: boot Camp, Reality Stars premiering this week on we tv
Speaker 1: um and what Else. Jared, that's it. Keep following us
Speaker 1: on Instagram, Well maybe we'll get a couple of more followers.
Speaker 1: Guys were getting there, We're getting there. We're not getting
Speaker 1: their congratulations to us on going that page so much. Anyways,
Speaker 1: I'll do it for this week's episode of Help I
Speaker 1: Suck at Dating. Be sure to tune in next week,
Speaker 1: where maybe we will suck just a little bit less.
Speaker 1: Follow Help I Suck At Dating with Dean Anglert on
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio or subscribe where every you listened upon
Speaker 1: MHM