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Speaker 1: This episode is brought to you by Masterclass, and I've

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Speaker 1: got some exciting news this month. My masterclass on Navigating

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Speaker 1: Change is live on the Masterclass platform. Go to masterclass

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Speaker 1: dot com forward slash navigate change to tune in now.

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Speaker 1: I think we often feel that no has to be

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Speaker 1: felt like a door slamming in your face or someone

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Speaker 1: face palming you. Right. We almost imagine a no to

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Speaker 1: feel like rejection. And I think that when we decline

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Speaker 1: an invitation, it doesn't have to feel like a closed door.

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Speaker 1: It can feel like a gentle communication, a gentle knights

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Speaker 1: to say, Hey, Olive, loved this, Thank you so much.

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Speaker 1: I am so grateful. I appreciate it so much, but

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Speaker 1: I won't be able to make it. Hey, everyone, welcome

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Speaker 1: back to on Purpose. Thank you so much for tuning in,

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Speaker 1: checking in with yourself, whether you're walking your dog, you're cooking,

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Speaker 1: whether you're driving, whether you're training at the gym, right now,

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Speaker 1: wherever you are, thank you so much for being here.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for trusting me. I am so happy that

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Speaker 1: I get to connect with you at these really important

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Speaker 1: times in your life. I think that right now, with

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Speaker 1: the holidays around the corner, it's natural for anxiety and

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Speaker 1: stress to be high. It's a heavy time because you're

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Speaker 1: meeting family, maybe family that triggers you, maybe family that

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Speaker 1: causes you stress. Maybe it's stressful because you're worried about

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Speaker 1: your finances. It might have been a difficult year money wise,

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Speaker 1: and it's getting to that time of year where you're

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Speaker 1: trying to make important choices for this year and next year.

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Speaker 1: Maybe you lost someone during this time of year a

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Speaker 1: few years back, and whenever it swings around to the holidays,

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Speaker 1: you're reminded of how special those times used to be

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Speaker 1: and you're struggling to find that new normal. Or maybe

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Speaker 1: the stress and anxiety exists because you've got to go

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Speaker 1: to so many parties, You've got to talk to so

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Speaker 1: many people. You've got to show up to your work party,

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Speaker 1: your friend's party, your family's party. There's so much going on.

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Speaker 1: If you're feeling stressed right now, I want you to

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Speaker 1: know that's okay and it's normal. If you're feeling anxious

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Speaker 1: right now, I want you to know it's okay and

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Speaker 1: it's normal. And if you're feeling overwhelmed right now, I

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Speaker 1: want you to know it's okay and it's normal. I

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Speaker 1: think when we don't acknowledge our stress. When we don't

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Speaker 1: acknowledge our anxiety, when we don't acknowledge our overwhelm, it

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Speaker 1: actually just grows. It actually gets worse, and it actually

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Speaker 1: feels like it increases, because it's almost like trying to

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Speaker 1: avoid something that you know is there, and all it's

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Speaker 1: trying to do is get your attention. Your stress, your

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Speaker 1: anxiety is simply trying to get your acknowledgment, your recognition,

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Speaker 1: and your validation. It's trying to say, look, I'm here,

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Speaker 1: don't ignore me. I'm trying to warn you I feel

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Speaker 1: a certain way. And the more we try to avoid it,

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Speaker 1: the more we try to pigeonhole it or get it

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Speaker 1: stuck in a box, the more it has to shout

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Speaker 1: and scream and knock for our attention. So the best

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Speaker 1: thing you can do for your stress is be aware

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Speaker 1: of it, and the worst thing you can do for

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Speaker 1: your stress is try to avoid it. Remember that the

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Speaker 1: best thing you can do for your stress is to

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Speaker 1: be aware of it, to acknowledge it, and the worst

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Speaker 1: thing you can do for your stress is to avoid

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Speaker 1: it or try to pretend that it doesn't exist in

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Speaker 1: the first place. Now, as I mentioned before, there are

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Speaker 1: so many reasons for us to feel stressed. And I

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Speaker 1: looked at a study that said that sixty six percent

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Speaker 1: of people feel they feel more stress during the holiday season.

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Speaker 1: And what's causing all this stress? The top sources financial

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Speaker 1: factors ranked highest at twenty eight percent. Family gatherings was

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Speaker 1: next at twenty one percent, traveling and planning was eighteen percent,

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Speaker 1: and disrupted routines was next at eighteen percent. So the

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Speaker 1: top four sources of stress we experienced around the holidays

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Speaker 1: were financial, family, travel and planning, and disrupted routines. And

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Speaker 1: I'm sure that you can relate to at least one

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Speaker 1: of these or a couple of these that may feel

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Speaker 1: really real for you. And I think it's even harder

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Speaker 1: because we look at the holiday period as a time

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Speaker 1: to celebrate, as a time to relax, as a time

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Speaker 1: to enjoy, is a time to be with family, as

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Speaker 1: a time to rejuvenate. Right, It's meant to be a

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Speaker 1: positive time. And when something's meant to be positive and

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Speaker 1: it isn't, it almost feels worse than if you expected

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Speaker 1: it to be not positive. Right, Does that make sense?

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Speaker 1: It's almost like if you're going to a comedy show,

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Speaker 1: you expect it to be funny, and if it isn't funny,

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Speaker 1: you're like, wait a minute, I wanted to laugh, Like

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Speaker 1: I came here to laugh, I came here to let loose,

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Speaker 1: I came here to be silly. I came here to

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Speaker 1: be entertained. But it isn't that. Whereas if you go

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Speaker 1: for a night out, if it ends up being funny

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Speaker 1: and you didn't plan on it, it's a bonus. That's

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Speaker 1: kind of what the holidays are like. We go out

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Speaker 1: there expecting to feel loved, to feel cared for, to

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Speaker 1: feel connected, to experience kindness, to be in a safe space,

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Speaker 1: and we often walk away feeling more triggered, more misaligned,

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Speaker 1: more disconnected from people we're supposed to love, from people

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Speaker 1: were supposed to be close to. And I think a

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Speaker 1: lot of our stress is around this idea of what

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Speaker 1: the holidays are supposed to be, what the holidays are

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Speaker 1: meant to be. And so as I walk you through

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Speaker 1: these pieces of advice, I want you to recognize that

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Speaker 1: we need to reframe our mind to the holidays. We

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Speaker 1: need to not have the expectation that this is going

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Speaker 1: to be the best time, that everything's going to be perfect,

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Speaker 1: and we also don't want to anticipate things and not

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Speaker 1: prepare for them. Often we know things are going to

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Speaker 1: be difficult or stressful, but we're not prepared in advance.

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Speaker 1: So I'm hoping that this episode gets you ready. So

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Speaker 1: the first one is remembering you're allowed to say no.

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Speaker 1: One of the points that came out is this disrupted routine.

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Speaker 1: And I think around the holidays, we feel the pressure

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Speaker 1: to have to say yes to every party and every event,

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Speaker 1: and I think we have to remember that it's okay

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Speaker 1: to say no. You don't need anyone's permission, you don't

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Speaker 1: need to check in with anyone else. If you don't

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Speaker 1: feel like going, it's okay. And I think what a

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Speaker 1: lot of people do is we think that we know that,

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Speaker 1: but we wait till the last minute. So what we

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Speaker 1: do is the RSVP comes, we know we don't want

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Speaker 1: to go, but we feel bad in the moment, So

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Speaker 1: what we do is we say yes, I'm attending. And

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Speaker 1: then as it gets closer and closer and closer, we're

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Speaker 1: now spending every day getting more and more stressed thinking

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Speaker 1: how do I get out of this party? How do

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Speaker 1: I say no? And as it gets closer, it gets harder.

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Speaker 1: We see the person maybe posting saying they're preparing. Maybe

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Speaker 1: they sent a text saying hey, this is what everyone

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Speaker 1: can bring, Right, you start to get closer and you think, wow,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to let them down even more now. And

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Speaker 1: then it comes to the moment just before the party

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Speaker 1: and you either force yourself to go or you guilt

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Speaker 1: trip yourself when you've sent the message saying you can't go,

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Speaker 1: and now you feel bad about it, and now you're

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Speaker 1: trying to make it up to the person, and now

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Speaker 1: you're overdoing it on the next event of party. How

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Speaker 1: many of you can relate to that, right, and so

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Speaker 1: many of us can relate to that, And that's why

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Speaker 1: it's so important to be okay with saying no, with

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Speaker 1: the beautiful explanation ahead of time. I really believe that

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Speaker 1: it's not about your answer, and it's more about the

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Speaker 1: affection with which it's delivered. I'm not able to go

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Speaker 1: to some of my friend's holiday parties either because I'm

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Speaker 1: traveling or I've got work, and I've clearly communicated to

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Speaker 1: them from the moment I got the invite saying, hey,

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Speaker 1: you know what, I would have loved to be here.

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Speaker 1: I know you put so much energy and effort. I'm

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Speaker 1: so grateful to be invited, but this is what's going on,

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Speaker 1: and I'm so sorry I can't be there. And I

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Speaker 1: find that having a genuine open communication elite lets you

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Speaker 1: feel better about yourself, but also lets the other person

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Speaker 1: know that you value them. I think we often feel

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Speaker 1: that no has to be felt like a door slamming

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Speaker 1: in your face or someone face palming you, right. We

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Speaker 1: almost imagine a no to feel like rejection. And I

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Speaker 1: think that when we decline an invitation, it doesn't have

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Speaker 1: to feel like a closed door. It can feel like

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Speaker 1: a gentle communication, a gentle knights to say, hey, I

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Speaker 1: would have loved this, thank you so much. I am

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Speaker 1: so grateful, appreciate it so much, but I won't be

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Speaker 1: able to make it. And I think I want to

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Speaker 1: remind you that please do this earlier, because the closer

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Speaker 1: it gets, you're just carrying that stress for longer, and

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Speaker 1: the more stress you carry for longer. Even if you

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Speaker 1: do end up getting the courage to say no, you

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Speaker 1: at the end of it feel bad for saying no,

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Speaker 1: and then it kind of starts the spiral all over again.

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Speaker 1: So remember it's okay to say no and it's okay

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Speaker 1: to prioritize the events and the parties that matter to

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Speaker 1: you the most and not feel pressured to go to

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Speaker 1: the ones that don't. And I think when we do

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Speaker 1: things out of pressure, we actually end up disliking ourselves

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Speaker 1: and the person more. Right. We often think like, oh,

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Speaker 1: if I say yes now, then it will all be

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Speaker 1: okay and everyone will be happy with me. But guess

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Speaker 1: what you said. Yes, the person didn't notice you much

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Speaker 1: at the party, or they were busy they were hosting.

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Speaker 1: And now you go back thinking, oh, they wouldn't even

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Speaker 1: have cared if I wasn't there, And it's like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: maybe they wouldn't have And why did you put that

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Speaker 1: pressure on yourself? So that's point number one. Now number

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Speaker 1: two this is a huge one. When we know we

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Speaker 1: have time off, we almost assume that it's enough. But

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Speaker 1: the truth is, and this blows my mind, more than

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Speaker 1: four in ten US workers don't take all their paid

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Speaker 1: time off, not unpaid paid time off. When workers who

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Speaker 1: don't take all their time off or asked why, some

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Speaker 1: reasons are more common than others, says Pew research. About

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Speaker 1: half of those who don't take all their time off

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Speaker 1: say they don't feel they need to take more a

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Speaker 1: similar share, forty nine percent say they'd worry about falling

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Speaker 1: behind that work if they took more time off, and

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Speaker 1: forty three percent of workers who don't take all their

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Speaker 1: time off say they'd feel badly about their co workers

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Speaker 1: taking on additional work. Now, notice how all of those

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Speaker 1: are really beautiful and noble thoughts. But here's the reality.

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Speaker 1: When you don't take time off, you don't get time

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Speaker 1: to refuel. If you don't take time to refuel, you're

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Speaker 1: actually doing less at work, even though you're spending more

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Speaker 1: time at work. Now, when you feel burnt out or exhausted,

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Speaker 1: or feel like you've been on for work for a

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Speaker 1: long period of time, guess what, it negatively impacts your

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Speaker 1: relationships with your co workers. So all the things that

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Speaker 1: you're trying to get right, all of a sudden, you're

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Speaker 1: actually making mistakes on all of those things. So it's

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Speaker 1: so important and healthy around the holidays, especially at a

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Speaker 1: time when everyone's switching off, especially at a time if

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Speaker 1: you can taking a bit more time off to say,

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Speaker 1: you know what, this is the time I'm going to

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Speaker 1: use to refuel. This is the time I'm going to

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Speaker 1: use to feel better. Often the stress and anxiety comes

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Speaker 1: from the fact that all of our time off are

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Speaker 1: spent at the events, all of our time off is

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Speaker 1: spent with other people, and then we go back from

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Speaker 1: the holidays feeling like we didn't get time to rejuvenate.

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Speaker 1: This segment about sleep rituals is brought to you by

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Speaker 1: and make it more like a blissful escape to dreamland.

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Speaker 1: The answer lies in the power of a sleep ritual.

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Speaker 1: By adopting a personalized bedtime routine, you can create a

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Speaker 1: tranquil atmosphere, signal your body that it's time to unwind,

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Speaker 1: and ultimately invite a night of undisturbed deep sleep. Our

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Speaker 1: bodies love routine, and a regular sleep schedule can work.

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Speaker 1: Wonders aim to go to bed and wake up at

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Speaker 1: the same time every day, even on weekends. This helps

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Speaker 1: regulate your internal body clock and trains your brain to

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Speaker 1: recognize when it's time to wind down for the night.

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Speaker 1: Another factor that can affect your sleep quality is the

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Speaker 1: mattress that you're using. Having a good mattress can give

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Speaker 1: you the proper comfort and support, which means you can

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Speaker 1: sleep deeply and wake up feeling refreshed, which is essential

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Speaker 1: for your overall health, reducing pain and feeling your best.

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Speaker 1: With dream Cloud, it's about investing in yourself and it

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Speaker 1: I think it's so important to set aside some time

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Speaker 1: to really enjoy and appreciate this moment, to not put

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Speaker 1: so much pressure on yourself around this time, to say,

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Speaker 1: all right, I've got Christmas. Families I've got this event

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Speaker 1: at this person's and then I'll be back at work

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Speaker 1: and not feel like you've really got to decompress. Please

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Speaker 1: take some time off, Please prioritize time off during this

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Speaker 1: period of the year. Number three. This is a really

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Speaker 1: tough one during the holidays, but hear me out. So

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Speaker 1: research shows that, of course, the holidays are a time

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Speaker 1: where we like to overindulge. The firstive time of year

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Speaker 1: is known for an abundance of food and drink. We

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Speaker 1: know that, says this study. Most holiday parties obviously are

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Speaker 1: filled with high calorie foods and alcohol, and the overwhelming

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Speaker 1: majority seventy nine percent of respondents said that they follow

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Speaker 1: a less strict diet during the holidays, and most people

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Speaker 1: reported that they eat more sweets and dessert at this time.

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Speaker 1: Twenty six percent reported an increase in sweets and desserts.

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Speaker 1: And I think all of us, including me, I'm in

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Speaker 1: this boat, right, I am in this boat and let loose,

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Speaker 1: I let go. What does that do? It drops my immunity.

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Speaker 1: It makes me feel more unwell now, especially as someone

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Speaker 1: who grew up in London. The weather's not always great either,

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Speaker 1: So if you live in a cold climate, the weather

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Speaker 1: adds to all of this. Now you're feeling more run

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Speaker 1: down at the end of the year, you carry that

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Speaker 1: into the beginning of the new year, and now you're

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Speaker 1: recovering from that. Now. I'm not saying I don't want

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Speaker 1: you to eat what you want to eat and have fun.

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Speaker 1: Of course, I want you to have the best time.

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Speaker 1: But I do think that it's important in between the

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Speaker 1: events to add some healthy meals and some healthy habits.

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Speaker 1: For me, one of my favorite things to do is

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Speaker 1: making sure that I'm taking a pack of Vitamin C

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Speaker 1: every single day. I take the one that has the

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Speaker 1: pulp in it. You literally almost like drink, slash, eat it.

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Speaker 1: I feel so much better. It is saved me from

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Speaker 1: getting ill so many times. I remember I had just

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Speaker 1: finished my press tour, so check this out. When my

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Speaker 1: book came out this year, Eight Rules of Love, I

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Speaker 1: went from I did press in New York for over

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Speaker 1: three days. It was stacked from literally seven am to

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Speaker 1: nine pm. We did everything from Good Morning America to

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Speaker 1: CBS through to so what else do we do? We

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Speaker 1: did The Colbert Show in the evenings, We did a

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Speaker 1: ton of podcasts, like there was so much stuff. Then

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Speaker 1: I flew to London, did a week of press in

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Speaker 1: London all the TV shows and podcasts, then flowed to

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Speaker 1: India for thirty six hours, did a photo shoot for

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Speaker 1: Vogue with my wife, then flew back to la and

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Speaker 1: did more press there. Then I had five days before

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Speaker 1: I left for my World tour. That's a crazy schedule,

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Speaker 1: and I'll be honest with you. In those five days,

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Speaker 1: while I was rehearsing for my World tour, I was

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Speaker 1: so certain that I was going to get sick. And

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Speaker 1: every day, thanks to my amazing, amazing chief of staff, Jordan,

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Speaker 1: I took these vitamin C packs and they saved me

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Speaker 1: from getting sick, and it was amazing that I didn't

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Speaker 1: fall sick during that time. So again I'm not saying

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Speaker 1: I don't want you to have fun, but I want

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Speaker 1: you to find a way to have some healthy habits.

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Speaker 1: Having your vitamin D, vitamin C B twelve, if you're

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Speaker 1: taking a basic multivitamin, it's so important, especially during this time,

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Speaker 1: and if you can have some healthy meals in between,

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Speaker 1: it will make a huge difference. Now, Habit number four,

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Speaker 1: This one is really important because I feel that, as

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Speaker 1: we heard, family triggers in family conflict is a big one.

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Speaker 1: Maybe you're seeing a family member that you know from

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Speaker 1: your childhood has been someone who triggers you. Maybe you're

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Speaker 1: going to see someone who you know you have different political,

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Speaker 1: religious views from. Maybe you see someone who always likes

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Speaker 1: to point out that your career isn't going in the

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Speaker 1: right direction according to them. You meet someone who doesn't

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Speaker 1: like your partner. Maybe you are the partner that your

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Speaker 1: in laws don't like, right like, There's so many ways

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Speaker 1: family can be triggering, and I've experienced this before as well,

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Speaker 1: and for me, it's always been to remind myself that

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Speaker 1: I know who's going to be triggering. I prepare knowing

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Speaker 1: that I'm going to deal with that. I'm going to

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Speaker 1: sit and smile, and I'm going to try and spend

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Speaker 1: time with someone else. I recognize that I can't fight

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Speaker 1: this person, I can't debate them. I don't want to

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Speaker 1: waste my energy trying to convince them otherwise. And I'm

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Speaker 1: going to expect it to happen. Rather than hoping that

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Speaker 1: it won't happen. I'm going to expect that it will

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Speaker 1: happen so that I'm not surprised, so that I'm not

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Speaker 1: caught off guard, and so that I can actually enjoy

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Speaker 1: myself by saying this is expected, this is likely. It's

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Speaker 1: almost like saying you know, traffic's going to be there. Right.

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Speaker 1: If you're going on a road trip and you don't

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Speaker 1: predict the traffic and suddenly you hit a traffic jam,

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Speaker 1: you're like, well, why is this happening right now? Whereas

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Speaker 1: if you say, you know what, I know there's going

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Speaker 1: to be traffic. But I'm going to take along my

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Speaker 1: favorite playlist. I'm going to take along a bunch of

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Speaker 1: games for the car. I'm going to listen to my

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Speaker 1: favorite podcast, Thank You So Much. Right, Like, the idea

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Speaker 1: is saying, I know this family member is going to

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Speaker 1: trigger me, I'm going to ignore them. I love talking

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Speaker 1: to this family member. I'm going to make sure I

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Speaker 1: take games. I'm going to make sure that I take

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Speaker 1: a book. I'm going to make sure that whatever it is, right,

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Speaker 1: whatever works for you. The point is expecting triggers is

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Speaker 1: better than hoping they won't happen. Tip Number five. During

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Speaker 1: the holidays, one of the things that I think we

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Speaker 1: don't reckon that stresses us during the holidays is that

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Speaker 1: we often start doing what everyone else wants us to do.

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Speaker 1: How many of you go to events just because someone

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Speaker 1: else wants you to do it. How many of you

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Speaker 1: want to go to holiday parties just because someone else

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Speaker 1: wants you to go to it. How many of you

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Speaker 1: get into the festive spirit because someone else wants you

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Speaker 1: to get into it. Now, I'm someone who loves holiday music,

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Speaker 1: I love holiday decoration. I'm a holiday person. I love

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Speaker 1: holiday movies. I love all of it right, But not

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Speaker 1: everyone feels that way. And what I find is that

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Speaker 1: I have to do what I truly want, and everyone

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Speaker 1: else has to do what they truly want. So if

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Speaker 1: I want to do a Harry Potter marathon with my sister,

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Speaker 1: which is something we do every year, I'm going to

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Speaker 1: do that no matter what, because the holidays are a

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Speaker 1: time for you. It's rare to have that much time

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Speaker 1: off when the whole world switches off at the same time.

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Speaker 1: And I want you to think about that for a second.

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Speaker 1: It's one of the few times in the world when

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Speaker 1: most people in the world are able to switch off,

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Speaker 1: and therefore allowing yourself to switch off and do what

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Speaker 1: you true want. If you want a party, if you

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Speaker 1: want to have certain experiences, if you don't want to

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Speaker 1: do any of it. If you want to focus on

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Speaker 1: things at home, whatever it may be. This is your

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Speaker 1: reminder to say, make sure you do what you want

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Speaker 1: to do, not what you feel pressure to do, not

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Speaker 1: what you think you have to do, not what you

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Speaker 1: think you should do, but what you truly, truly want

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Speaker 1: to do, and don't sacrifice for that. Don't settle off

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Speaker 1: for any less than that, because this is the one

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Speaker 1: time of year when you can truly do it. Now.

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Speaker 1: This one is a tough one, but I have to

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Speaker 1: make a point of it because of the finances being

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Speaker 1: such a big thing. Make a budget. Please don't go

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Speaker 1: into it. I know sometimes right like, the reason why

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Speaker 1: we don't make budgets is because we'd rather not know.

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Speaker 1: But the problem is at one point we inevitably end

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Speaker 1: up checking. And then when we end up checking, we go, oh, no,

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Speaker 1: I wish I checked ahead of time. And so here's

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Speaker 1: what I'm going to say to you. Check in advance,

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Speaker 1: right like, check in advance, set a budget, write a

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Speaker 1: list of all your gifts. I promise you you will

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Speaker 1: not regret it in the future, as opposed to overspending

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Speaker 1: and then looking back and thinking I should have done that,

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Speaker 1: or sometimes underspending and thinking, oh, I wish I got

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Speaker 1: them a better gift. I wish we did more for them,

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Speaker 1: And so I think so many of us don't set

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Speaker 1: a budget. I'm going to say, make a budget right

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Speaker 1: now for all your holiday gifts, for all your holiday decor,

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Speaker 1: so that you don't give yourself a hard time later

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Speaker 1: on Number seven. If you're like me and you love

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Speaker 1: gifts and you love presents, make sure you're clear with

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Speaker 1: people about what you want. I think expectations are really

402
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Speaker 1: tough during the holidays. You unwrap that gift. Do you

403
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Speaker 1: remember that scene in Love Actually, Oh, I love it

404
00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:45,960
Speaker 1: where the guy who plays Snape Alan Rickman rest in

405
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Speaker 1: peace phenomenal, you know, wonderful talent. Alan Rickman goes to

406
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Speaker 1: buy a heart shaped necklace for this girl at work

407
00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:59,520
Speaker 1: he's flirting with, not for his wife, and then he

408
00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,440
Speaker 1: ends up going to mister Bean, and mister Bean takes

409
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Speaker 1: too long to pack his gift. I've felt like that

410
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Speaker 1: so many times when I've got to get a gift

411
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Speaker 1: and then his wife spots that he bought that, but

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Speaker 1: then she doesn't get it. Now I've just realized that

413
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:12,919
Speaker 1: this doesn't apply to my point. But I'm glad I

414
00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:16,399
Speaker 1: told that story anyway, But what I was trying to

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00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:18,600
Speaker 1: say is that if you want something, make sure someone

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Speaker 1: knows his wife. Unfortunately, in that situation was being kind

417
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Speaker 1: of cheated on, so I don't think that that would

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Speaker 1: have mattered in her case. But if you're expecting your

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Speaker 1: partner to guess your mind, read your brain, and know

420
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Speaker 1: what you want for Christmas, please don't do that. Allow

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Speaker 1: them the opportunity to plan, to prepare by letting them know.

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of us open gifts. We get

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Speaker 1: something that we didn't want, we get something that we

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Speaker 1: feel wasn't good enough, whatever it may be. Be clear

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Speaker 1: about your wishes. I think you know if you grew

426
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Speaker 1: up believing that Santa Claus was going to deliver your

427
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Speaker 1: perfect gift and your parents read your mind. It's easy

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Speaker 1: to expect that from a partner. It's easy to expect

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Speaker 1: that from a loved one. But as we get older,

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Speaker 1: it becomes harder and harder for our minds to be read,

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Speaker 1: and it becomes harder and harder for someone to deliver

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Speaker 1: on that. So it's a simple one, but please make

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Speaker 1: someone know your wishes. Number eight. I think a lot

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Speaker 1: of the times during the holidays, everyone says just be present,

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Speaker 1: and I think there's an issue with this advice because

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Speaker 1: I also think we need to plan ahead. I think

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00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,800
Speaker 1: we need to plan ahead and say, Okay, how many

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Speaker 1: parties am I going to? Am I going to be

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Speaker 1: tired on Saturday night? Do I really want to do

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Speaker 1: that on Sunday? I would say, actually, look at your

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00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:33,080
Speaker 1: calendar and plan ahead. You can be present and be

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00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:36,000
Speaker 1: really frustrated with your presence because you didn't plan for it.

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Speaker 1: So there is a part of us that needs to

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00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 1: think about the future. But we need to think about

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Speaker 1: the future right now, like right now, and so plan ahead,

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00:23:44,359 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 1: looking at your calendar and making sure you get it

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00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,760
Speaker 1: right and now Number nine is the opposite. Make time

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Speaker 1: to reflect this year. I'm going to be doing an

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Speaker 1: episode at the end of the year helping you reflect

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Speaker 1: on your greatest lessons, your greatest goals for next year,

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Speaker 1: your aspirations, the learn things the meaning from this year.

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Speaker 1: But make time to reflect. I find that the holidays

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Speaker 1: can be stressful because we didn't plan on reflecting. And

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Speaker 1: here's my favorite way of reflecting. What's something I want

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Speaker 1: to add to next year to make it better? What's

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00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 1: something I want to subtract from next year that I

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00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:20,880
Speaker 1: did this year to make it better. And what's one

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Speaker 1: thing I want to multiply. What's one thing I want

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Speaker 1: to double down on right, What's something that really brought

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00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:28,080
Speaker 1: me joy this year and I want to do it

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Speaker 1: a lot more. What do I want to add to

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Speaker 1: next year? What do I want to subtract from next year?

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Speaker 1: And what I want to multiply. I never thought math

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Speaker 1: could be so useful. And number ten, don't abandon therapy

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Speaker 1: and meditation and whatever your self practices are. It's really

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Speaker 1: easy to abandon them, thinking this is a time where

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Speaker 1: we just have to have fun, let loose, or we're

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00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:50,840
Speaker 1: too busy, But this is a time we often need

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00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:53,600
Speaker 1: it most. So here are ten strategies to help with

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Speaker 1: your stress. I hope that they support you and wishing

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Speaker 1: you all the best. I really hope that you feel

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00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:05,080
Speaker 1: supported during this time. And hey, not everything's going to

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00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:06,600
Speaker 1: go to plan. People are going to say things to

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00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,080
Speaker 1: annoy you and trigger you. You're going to have days

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00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:11,600
Speaker 1: where you feel upset. But I hope that you will

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Speaker 1: reconnect with this episode and pass it on to reconnect

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Speaker 1: with these tensible things that can really help you. Thanks

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Speaker 1: so much for listening. I appreciate you. Look out for

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Speaker 1: some more amazing episodes during the holidays, and I can't

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00:25:24,359 --> 00:25:28,000
Speaker 1: wait to continue finishing off twenty twenty three on a

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00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:30,679
Speaker 1: high and I look forward to doing that with you.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much. Mental health is now talked about

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Speaker 1: have to tell you that it's a primary focus of

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Speaker 1: on Purpose, but on a day to day basis, many

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Speaker 1: people don't know where to turn or which tools can help.

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Speaker 1: Over the past couple of years, I've been working with

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