Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Speaker 1: Today's tip is to be choosy about who you get
Speaker 1: advice from. You want guidance from people who are experts,
Speaker 1: not from those who are struggling with a topic they're
Speaker 1: giving advice about, or who don't truly know much about it.
Speaker 1: There's a great scene in the nineteen eighties movie Say Anything,
Speaker 1: when John Cusack's character is upset about his love life.
Speaker 1: At a gas station. He runs into cool guys from
Speaker 1: his high school who offer him lots of advice. He
Speaker 1: moles over what they say, and then realizes that they
Speaker 1: are giving him advice about dating while they are hanging
Speaker 1: out in the parking lot of a gas station. If
Speaker 1: you guys know so much about women, basically asks them,
Speaker 1: how come you're at the gas and sip on a
Speaker 1: Saturday night, completely alone, drinking beers with no women anywhere.
Speaker 1: It's a good question. There are so many people in
Speaker 1: our daily lives who are ready to offer advice, not
Speaker 1: to mention an internet full of influencers. Some of these
Speaker 1: people are about as qualified to offer advice as those
Speaker 1: guys at the gas station. So whenever you are weighing
Speaker 1: a piece of advice, consider who you are getting it from.
Speaker 1: Are they experiencing their lives in a way that you
Speaker 1: would like to experience yours? Have they solved the problem
Speaker 1: that you are trying to solve. This matters because sometimes
Speaker 1: the person hasn't solved the problem, they are still clearly
Speaker 1: struggling with it. And other times the person may never
Speaker 1: have experienced the problem in the first place, and so
Speaker 1: the advice isn't going to be helpful to you in
Speaker 1: those circum dances either. I see this a lot with
Speaker 1: parenting advice. Kids are their own people, so I'd say
Speaker 1: the fact that someone's kid turned out in a socially
Speaker 1: acceptable manner doesn't prove the person was a great parent.
Speaker 1: The opposite is also true. You can do everything right
Speaker 1: and have a kid who grows up to make terrible decisions.
Speaker 1: This should prompt all of us to think, there but
Speaker 1: for the grace of God go I. But even with
Speaker 1: smaller matters like sleep or eating, we are all dealing
Speaker 1: with different beasts. I see people offering advice on how
Speaker 1: to help picky eaters, and they talk about cutting your
Speaker 1: child's ham, cheese and mustard sandwiches into fun shapes. Great,
Speaker 1: But if your kid will eat a sandwich an item
Speaker 1: that contains more than one ingredient touching, let alone strong
Speaker 1: flavors like mustard, they are not the truly tough cases
Speaker 1: n selective eating, So take this advice with a grain
Speaker 1: of salt. A certain sort of sleep training might work
Speaker 1: for one kid whose parents then become evangelical about it,
Speaker 1: but that doesn't mean other parents who try it and
Speaker 1: don't see results are doing it wrong. Maybe the first
Speaker 1: family didn't really have a tough case on the sleeping front,
Speaker 1: or there was only one thing that was the matter
Speaker 1: and this particular method adds just that, or really, who knows.
Speaker 1: I also find myself wary of time management advice from
Speaker 1: people who don't have any commitments to other people. I
Speaker 1: am sure some of their strategies worked great for some
Speaker 1: folks who are in similar situations, but if your morning
Speaker 1: routine will never be interrupted by a screaming toddler, then
Speaker 1: we are not dealing with the same circumstances. So those
Speaker 1: of us with toddlers need to be careful about taking
Speaker 1: advice that is just going to frustrate us. So instead,
Speaker 1: look for people who have dealt with the same problem,
Speaker 1: or who seem particularly exemplary on a dimension you admire.
Speaker 1: We don't know how our kids will turn out, but
Speaker 1: it's probably a better bet to take parenting advice from
Speaker 1: someone who seems to enjoy his or her kids than
Speaker 1: someone who's constantly annoyed. Does that family seem to be
Speaker 1: having a good time, then it might be helpful to
Speaker 1: try to copy the magic. Financial advice is probably best
Speaker 1: from someone with a normal income who seems calm and
Speaker 1: capable with her money. She takes hits like everyone else,
Speaker 1: and she takes them in stride. But someone who's got
Speaker 1: great tricks from moving around balances on credit cards, well,
Speaker 1: we might have a gas and set moment here, because
Speaker 1: if a person is great with finances, it's really unclear
Speaker 1: how they have all that credit card debt in the
Speaker 1: first place. Be choosy about where you good advice, and
Speaker 1: the advice will probably prove more useful in the meantime.
Speaker 1: This is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making
Speaker 1: the most of our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to
Speaker 1: hear from you. You can send me your tips, your questions,
Speaker 1: or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter. Facebook
Speaker 1: and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod that's B the number four,
Speaker 1: then Breakfast p o D. You can also shoot me
Speaker 1: an email at Before Breakfast podcast. At i heeart media
Speaker 1: dot com that before Breakfast is spelled out with all
Speaker 1: the letters. Thanks so much, I look forward to staying
Speaker 1: in touch. Before Breakfast is a production of I heart Radio.
Speaker 1: For more podcasts from I heart Radio, visit the i
Speaker 1: heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
Speaker 1: your favorite shows. Yea