WEBVTT - Heather | Betrayal Weekly 0:00:04.000 --> 0:00:06.880 It's not like he was cheating on me, because I 0:00:06.880 --> 0:00:09.480 don't think you can call it cheating when what you 0:00:09.640 --> 0:00:13.840 do is prey on women, when you are a hunter 0:00:14.600 --> 0:00:16.560 trying to find more victims. 0:00:29.440 --> 0:00:32.600 I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal, a show about 0:00:32.600 --> 0:00:35.919 the people we trust the most and the deceptions that 0:00:36.040 --> 0:00:43.440 change everything. Heather Rovett is the middle child in a 0:00:43.520 --> 0:00:44.479 tight knit family. 0:00:45.000 --> 0:00:48.320 I have an older brother and a younger sister. We 0:00:48.320 --> 0:00:50.040 were all very close in age. 0:00:50.640 --> 0:00:54.040 She loved growing up in Toronto, Canada. Her childhood was 0:00:54.080 --> 0:00:55.600 filled with all the best. 0:00:55.400 --> 0:01:03.320 Things, joy and fun and love and adventure and kindness. 0:01:03.920 --> 0:01:05.679 Her parents had a great marriage. 0:01:06.120 --> 0:01:09.320 My parents met in high school and were high school sweethearts, 0:01:09.360 --> 0:01:12.480 and he would look at my mom with such adoration. 0:01:13.280 --> 0:01:16.319 They also taught her the value of building a meaningful career. 0:01:17.319 --> 0:01:24.520 My mom was a child psychologist neuroscientist. She's very, very smart, 0:01:24.680 --> 0:01:31.160 and my father was a lawyer who specialized primarily in 0:01:31.480 --> 0:01:32.479 labor law. 0:01:34.040 --> 0:01:37.160 Through high school and university, Heather dated and fell in 0:01:37.200 --> 0:01:38.240 love a few times. 0:01:38.760 --> 0:01:43.880 I've always been able to flirt with guys and there's 0:01:43.880 --> 0:01:48.360 been interest, but it wasn't my main focus to have 0:01:48.400 --> 0:01:51.360 a boyfriend or seek male attention. 0:01:52.440 --> 0:01:56.120 After graduating from university, Heather carved her own path. 0:01:56.800 --> 0:02:00.800 I became a real estate salesperson and then two years 0:02:00.880 --> 0:02:02.680 later I upgraded to broker. 0:02:03.440 --> 0:02:05.320 The career came easily to Heather. 0:02:06.400 --> 0:02:09.120 I can see how you can transform a space or 0:02:09.120 --> 0:02:12.320 how you can make it your home. I just had 0:02:12.360 --> 0:02:14.840 this tenacity and energy. 0:02:15.760 --> 0:02:19.040 Over the next ten years, Heather gained recognition in Toronto's 0:02:19.040 --> 0:02:21.919 real estate scene. By her late thirties, she had built 0:02:21.919 --> 0:02:22.880 a career she loved. 0:02:23.520 --> 0:02:27.680 I loved working and it paid off, and then it 0:02:27.720 --> 0:02:30.440 allowed me to do cool things too, like go on trips. 0:02:31.040 --> 0:02:34.120 She also made a good amount of money. She decided 0:02:34.120 --> 0:02:37.440 to renovate her condo in Toronto and she invested some 0:02:37.560 --> 0:02:39.560 of her funds with a financial advisor. 0:02:40.760 --> 0:02:43.320 I would meet with him quarterly and he would show 0:02:43.360 --> 0:02:46.680 me paperwork of how my money was doing, and I 0:02:46.720 --> 0:02:48.920 thought it was great. And when push came to shove 0:02:48.960 --> 0:02:51.560 and I wanted to sell and get my money back, 0:02:52.760 --> 0:02:54.240 he basically disappeared. 0:02:55.600 --> 0:02:56.560 She'd been scammed. 0:02:57.600 --> 0:03:00.680 He got arrested and there was about five of their people. 0:03:00.720 --> 0:03:06.040 He did this too. The sad thing is, even though 0:03:06.080 --> 0:03:09.200 he was found guilty and ordered to pay the restitution. 0:03:10.480 --> 0:03:11.520 I never saw a penny. 0:03:14.080 --> 0:03:17.920 She lost one hundred and twenty seven thousand dollars. The 0:03:17.960 --> 0:03:21.560 scam was damaging, not only financially, but also to her 0:03:21.600 --> 0:03:25.000 sense of trust in other people. But with time, Heather 0:03:25.120 --> 0:03:28.080 accepted the loss and was able to rebuild. She was 0:03:28.120 --> 0:03:31.200 in her mid forties and single. She managed to pull 0:03:31.240 --> 0:03:33.880 together the funds to finish renovating her condo. 0:03:34.400 --> 0:03:37.160 And I transformed that condo into a beautiful space. And 0:03:37.200 --> 0:03:40.680 then one day I noticed, you know, there were just 0:03:40.720 --> 0:03:42.680 some things that weren't quite right. 0:03:43.400 --> 0:03:46.280 Heather noticed an issue with the cabinets, so she called 0:03:46.280 --> 0:03:49.320 the company who had installed them. They agreed to send 0:03:49.360 --> 0:03:50.560 someone out to take a look. 0:03:51.440 --> 0:03:53.840 He was like, no problem, we have a new service guy. 0:03:54.040 --> 0:03:56.720 He's great. I'm going to give him your contact info 0:03:56.760 --> 0:03:59.560 and he'll be in touch and probably a week later. 0:03:59.680 --> 0:04:02.000 On a Monday morning in July, I woke up to 0:04:02.040 --> 0:04:05.760 a text message, this is Jace, and I was hoping 0:04:05.760 --> 0:04:08.800 I could come by today to fix the outstanding work. 0:04:09.400 --> 0:04:11.880 An hour later, there was a knock at my door 0:04:12.680 --> 0:04:19.239 and I was greeted by this very ruggedly cute guy. 0:04:22.640 --> 0:04:27.039 I was a little befuddled. I found myself a little 0:04:27.040 --> 0:04:31.680 tongue tied and was like, oh wow, sure, come on in. 0:04:32.560 --> 0:04:35.160 Jace got to work fixing the cabinets in her kitchen, 0:04:35.760 --> 0:04:37.880 and afterwards I asked. 0:04:37.720 --> 0:04:40.360 Him if he could help me hang a couple towel 0:04:40.360 --> 0:04:45.080 bars up in the bathrooms, and he happily obliged. We 0:04:45.080 --> 0:04:49.039 were about three quarters of the way through hanging the 0:04:49.080 --> 0:04:51.880 second one and his phone was ringing and he was like, 0:04:51.960 --> 0:04:54.680 oh my gosh, I'm so behind schedule. I gotta go. 0:04:55.200 --> 0:04:57.560 He goes, do you have this? I'm like, I got it, 0:04:57.640 --> 0:05:01.960 don't worry. But she didn't have it, and I kind 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:04.000 of made more of a mess of it. Was on 0:05:04.080 --> 0:05:07.479 an angle, and I noticed on my kitchen island was 0:05:07.520 --> 0:05:11.159 his measuring tape. So I called him and said, you 0:05:11.240 --> 0:05:14.560 left your measuring tape here, and by the way, I've 0:05:14.600 --> 0:05:17.400 made a mess of this towel bar. And he laughed 0:05:17.440 --> 0:05:19.400 and he said, you know what, I'm literally ten minutes away. 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:21.600 Why don't I swing back over and we'll fix it. 0:05:22.400 --> 0:05:25.359 And he comes in and within two minutes it's fixed. 0:05:25.880 --> 0:05:28.720 Heather offered to treat Jase to lunch to thank him 0:05:28.720 --> 0:05:30.880 for going out of his way, and he agreed. 0:05:33.680 --> 0:05:36.760 Over lunch, we started talking and I did share with 0:05:36.839 --> 0:05:39.719 him about, you know, the stress of the renovation and 0:05:40.400 --> 0:05:41.720 the guy who stole my money. 0:05:42.320 --> 0:05:45.360 Jase was sympathetic. He was also going through his own 0:05:45.440 --> 0:05:46.159 legal battle. 0:05:46.760 --> 0:05:49.520 I learned a little bit more about him. He had 0:05:49.560 --> 0:05:52.120 a child, and he was going through family court, and 0:05:52.400 --> 0:05:54.599 he had his own software engineering business, but he was 0:05:54.600 --> 0:05:58.039 winding that down because of the divorce. I was like, 0:05:58.120 --> 0:06:00.000 this is so great. This guy just is so easy, 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:00.839 easy to talk to. 0:06:02.200 --> 0:06:04.880 Jace used to be a software engineer, but after a 0:06:04.880 --> 0:06:08.400 difficult separation, he decided to take a break from office work. 0:06:08.839 --> 0:06:11.440 He wanted a job working with his hands, which is 0:06:11.480 --> 0:06:14.719 how he got into carpentry. At the end of their lunch, 0:06:15.360 --> 0:06:16.719 Jace insisted on paying. 0:06:17.600 --> 0:06:21.040 I walked him back to his truck and he said, 0:06:21.080 --> 0:06:23.000 you know, if you need any more help around the condo. 0:06:23.040 --> 0:06:25.160 I know he didn't get everything done, message me call 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:26.480 me anytime. I'm like, okay. 0:06:28.600 --> 0:06:31.080 On our walk home, she couldn't stop smiling. 0:06:32.400 --> 0:06:34.240 Oh my gosh, was I just flirting? 0:06:34.360 --> 0:06:37.839 Like that guy was really cute. Later that evening, she 0:06:37.960 --> 0:06:40.680 decided to try and tackle some other projects herself. 0:06:41.360 --> 0:06:45.240 I went to look for what I like to call 0:06:45.400 --> 0:06:49.640 my single girl toolbox, which is a hammer, a leveler, 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:54.680 and the one screwdriver. And I couldn't find my screwdriver anywhere, 0:06:55.240 --> 0:06:58.479 so she texted Jace. I just said, hey, you didn't 0:06:58.520 --> 0:07:02.640 happen to see a green screwdriver? And he wrote back 0:07:02.680 --> 0:07:06.680 He's like, well, what can I say? I found myself 0:07:06.760 --> 0:07:09.039 later in the day in possession of your screwdriver and 0:07:09.080 --> 0:07:11.160 I didn't know what to do with it, if I 0:07:11.160 --> 0:07:12.840 should be honest or just return it. 0:07:13.520 --> 0:07:16.520 He told her that he was holding her screwdriver hostage. 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:19.520 She thought it was cute funny even. 0:07:20.360 --> 0:07:28.720 That led to about two weeks of really flirtatious banter 0:07:29.040 --> 0:07:33.320 over text, and I thought it was really fun. Every 0:07:33.320 --> 0:07:35.760 time I got a text from him. It was like 0:07:35.760 --> 0:07:36.720 like an endorphin hic. 0:07:37.440 --> 0:07:41.240 They started texting every day. Jase wasn't shy about his 0:07:41.280 --> 0:07:42.160 attraction to her. 0:07:42.640 --> 0:07:44.920 I remember he sent this one message and he said, 0:07:45.280 --> 0:07:47.800 just please tell me you know how sexy you are, Heather. 0:07:47.920 --> 0:07:52.720 I'm like what, And I jokingly said, well, you should 0:07:52.720 --> 0:07:53.920 see me when I'm really cleaned up. 0:07:53.960 --> 0:07:54.640 I mean you met me. 0:07:54.720 --> 0:07:57.640 I was like just rolled out of bed, lol, and 0:07:57.680 --> 0:07:59.880 he said no, it's not that. He goes like, it's 0:07:59.880 --> 0:08:04.280 your mind like to know how freaking sexy that is 0:08:04.320 --> 0:08:07.120 to me. And I was like, wow, this is so refreshing, 0:08:07.160 --> 0:08:09.080 Like this guy isn't just about how I look. He 0:08:09.200 --> 0:08:12.640 liked my mind, like this is awesome. So there was 0:08:12.680 --> 0:08:16.800 this tension that was definitely building and this flirtation. 0:08:18.200 --> 0:08:22.400 Finally, after two weeks of flirting, Jason asked her out 0:08:22.440 --> 0:08:23.400 on a proper date. 0:08:24.200 --> 0:08:27.680 He showed up on a motorcycle, which I thought was 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:33.800 really sexy. We walked to a cute little Italian restaurant 0:08:33.800 --> 0:08:35.120 around the corner from my house. 0:08:36.080 --> 0:08:39.640 It was a great date and Heather learned more about him. 0:08:40.240 --> 0:08:43.160 He shared with me how his mom had died when 0:08:43.160 --> 0:08:46.640 he was a teenager, and he talked a bit more 0:08:46.679 --> 0:08:50.320 about the custody battle and I asked him and I'm like, 0:08:50.360 --> 0:08:52.560 that's pretty heavy stuff, like how do you deal with 0:08:53.280 --> 0:08:55.680 that much loss and that much pain? And he said, 0:08:56.280 --> 0:08:57.640 I put it all in boxes. 0:08:58.840 --> 0:09:01.800 He was being really vulnerable with her, and she was 0:09:01.840 --> 0:09:04.400 impressed with how he was able to deal with everything 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:07.719 he had gone through. She found it really attractive. 0:09:09.880 --> 0:09:12.280 The date ended and we walked back to my place 0:09:12.480 --> 0:09:14.480 and we're both sort of shuffling in the doorway and 0:09:14.520 --> 0:09:17.079 I'm like, in my mind going is he going to 0:09:17.120 --> 0:09:19.960 kiss me? And I was like, fuck it, I'm just 0:09:20.000 --> 0:09:21.959 going to go for it. So I leaned in to 0:09:22.040 --> 0:09:23.800 kiss him. I was like, hey, thanks By, that was 0:09:23.840 --> 0:09:28.319 really fun. And next thing I know, he's pushed me 0:09:28.400 --> 0:09:30.560 up against the wall and we start making out. And 0:09:30.640 --> 0:09:34.160 this kiss was like a kiss I've never experienced before. 0:09:34.920 --> 0:09:39.840 It was passionate and intense. Jace left her in the doorway, stunned. 0:09:40.559 --> 0:09:41.120 I went to. 0:09:41.040 --> 0:09:43.640 Sleep that night with the biggest smile on my face. 0:09:44.679 --> 0:09:46.760 When I woke up the next morning, there was already 0:09:46.800 --> 0:09:49.839 a text message from him saying, good morning, Heather. It's 0:09:49.880 --> 0:09:52.480 a beautiful day and I hope you're spoiling like something 0:09:52.920 --> 0:09:55.560 cheesy but lovely, and I was like wow. 0:09:56.240 --> 0:09:59.080 The next night, Jace came over to her place. 0:09:59.640 --> 0:10:03.040 And he brought a bottle of wine. In my mind, 0:10:03.080 --> 0:10:06.240 I'm thinking, this is like, really, your second date with 0:10:06.280 --> 0:10:10.120 this guy? You don't know him, you know, should you 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:13.800 do the whole like three date rule or is it 0:10:13.840 --> 0:10:16.880 a three week rule or a three month rule or 0:10:16.960 --> 0:10:19.560 I don't know. And all of a sudden, whatever self 0:10:19.559 --> 0:10:23.360 imposed rules I had were just out the window. 0:10:31.320 --> 0:10:34.000 They couldn't wait to see each other again. It was 0:10:34.040 --> 0:10:35.880 the start of a summer romance. 0:10:36.679 --> 0:10:40.720 A couple weeks later, he took me out and bought 0:10:40.760 --> 0:10:45.360 me a motorcycle helmet, and we that summer went everywhere 0:10:45.400 --> 0:10:48.839 on the motorcycle. It was so fun. We had such 0:10:48.880 --> 0:10:52.640 a good time. I loved every minute of it. I 0:10:52.679 --> 0:10:55.840 don't think I slept a whole night for at least 0:10:55.920 --> 0:10:59.880 three months, because I just was so excited having this 0:11:00.200 --> 0:11:03.959 gorgeous human being lying beside me. I was like, oh 0:11:03.960 --> 0:11:05.760 my god, am I dreaming? This is crazy? 0:11:07.280 --> 0:11:09.080 And soon enough we. 0:11:08.920 --> 0:11:11.800 Were saying I love you. He said it first. 0:11:12.920 --> 0:11:16.920 Heather introduced Jace to her family in September. 0:11:17.080 --> 0:11:22.000 He met my mom and she really liked him. My birthday, 0:11:22.000 --> 0:11:25.040 which is in October, he met my sister and her boyfriend, 0:11:25.920 --> 0:11:29.280 and then a couple weeks later he met my dad. 0:11:30.320 --> 0:11:33.079 It was harder for her to meet Jace's family because 0:11:33.120 --> 0:11:35.240 a lot of them still lived in Italy. 0:11:35.640 --> 0:11:39.559 He was born in Italy, and both his Italian grandfathers 0:11:39.679 --> 0:11:41.800 fought in World War Two for the Allies. 0:11:42.800 --> 0:11:44.720 He came from a fascinating background. 0:11:45.640 --> 0:11:47.680 When my friends started meeting him, they all thought he 0:11:47.720 --> 0:11:51.679 was pretty great, and I was just so happy. Life 0:11:51.720 --> 0:11:56.240 was pretty electric, even like the simple activities going grocery 0:11:56.240 --> 0:11:59.520 shopping became fun because I wasn't doing it alone anymore, 0:12:00.120 --> 0:12:05.080 and I felt that my future was limitless and we 0:12:05.080 --> 0:12:08.120 were just going to live the best life ever. 0:12:29.559 --> 0:12:31.760 Heather Rovett had a meet cute with a man who 0:12:31.800 --> 0:12:35.880 fixed her kitchen cabinets. His name was Jace Peretti. Heather 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:39.600 and Jace fell hard and fast, and a whirlwind summer 0:12:39.679 --> 0:12:42.160 romance turned into a solid relationship. 0:12:43.400 --> 0:12:46.800 My second birthday with him, he said, check your email 0:12:46.880 --> 0:12:49.160 and I said okay, And I looked at my email 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:53.360 and there were Airic Canada tickets from Toronto to Rome. 0:12:54.160 --> 0:12:55.240 And I looked at him. 0:12:55.320 --> 0:12:57.200 I was like, we're going to Italy. And he said 0:12:57.200 --> 0:13:00.160 we're going to Italy and I was like, wow, Wow, 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:01.240 I can't believe we're going to go. 0:13:02.320 --> 0:13:05.360 During this time, Jace was dealing with a lot of stress. 0:13:05.800 --> 0:13:08.200 He went in more time with his young son, but 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:10.760 he and his ex were constantly in and out of 0:13:10.840 --> 0:13:11.560 family court. 0:13:12.800 --> 0:13:15.280 It was really hard for him. He had been the 0:13:15.320 --> 0:13:18.440 primary parent because he was working from home, so he 0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:20.640 went from spending all this time with his kid to 0:13:20.679 --> 0:13:25.120 now only seeing him two times a week for supervised visits. 0:13:27.240 --> 0:13:30.040 When Heather asked Jace about the custody arrangement. 0:13:30.600 --> 0:13:34.719 He explained because he had both a Canadian and an 0:13:34.760 --> 0:13:39.600 Italian passport. Her lawyer put the idea into her mind 0:13:39.679 --> 0:13:43.560 and the court that Jace had the capability of kidnapping 0:13:43.600 --> 0:13:45.480 their son and taking him to Italy. 0:13:47.760 --> 0:13:51.600 She felt for jas he wasn't that guy. He loved 0:13:51.640 --> 0:13:52.040 his son. 0:13:53.200 --> 0:13:55.920 He would go to the town she was living in 0:13:55.960 --> 0:13:57.320 and he would take him out for dinner, and then 0:13:57.320 --> 0:13:59.079 he would take him home and tuck him in and 0:13:59.080 --> 0:14:00.840 say good night to him, read them stories. 0:14:01.600 --> 0:14:04.480 Heather and Jace had been together for two years. They 0:14:04.480 --> 0:14:07.560 were living together in Toronto, but she had never met 0:14:07.600 --> 0:14:12.120 his son. With this custody arrangement, it put their relationship 0:14:12.200 --> 0:14:13.200 in a holding pattern. 0:14:13.800 --> 0:14:18.160 Honestly, not meeting his son and the family court was 0:14:19.640 --> 0:14:23.600 the albatross around our relationship's neck. It was the only 0:14:23.600 --> 0:14:26.720 thing we would fight about. I just couldn't understand that 0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:29.600 the family court was taking so long. I was like, 0:14:29.640 --> 0:14:30.560 this is so unfair. 0:14:31.880 --> 0:14:35.200 Heather was trying to help Jace regain some agency in 0:14:35.240 --> 0:14:38.480 the situation. She tried to help him in any way 0:14:38.560 --> 0:14:39.040 she could. 0:14:39.840 --> 0:14:43.360 I was like, you need a lawyer. So I had 0:14:43.480 --> 0:14:48.000 arranged a meeting for him with another very well known 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:52.800 Toronto family lawyer, and she said, the trials just around 0:14:52.840 --> 0:14:56.280 the corner and things will get settled. Let's hold off 0:14:56.400 --> 0:14:58.520 on introducing Heather for now. 0:14:59.720 --> 0:15:02.880 It was frustrating, but Heather didn't want to do anything 0:15:02.920 --> 0:15:06.480 that would compromise Jason's custody of his son. She agreed 0:15:06.520 --> 0:15:09.000 it was best to wait until everything was settled to 0:15:09.000 --> 0:15:12.320 bring his son into their lives. In the meantime, she 0:15:12.440 --> 0:15:15.320 wanted to set up their home so when the time came, 0:15:16.040 --> 0:15:17.760 they would be prepared to welcome him. 0:15:19.120 --> 0:15:21.240 I turned the guest room into a little boy's room, 0:15:21.720 --> 0:15:24.000 and I had toys for him and books for him 0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:27.680 and games for him. And I spent two weeks online 0:15:27.720 --> 0:15:29.920 trying to find like the perfect duvet cover for his 0:15:30.000 --> 0:15:33.480 bedroom because I was so obsessed with making everything amazing 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:35.400 for him, and I couldn't wait for him to come 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:37.200 and start having sleepovers at our house. 0:15:37.680 --> 0:15:39.840 But every time she got her hopes. 0:15:39.600 --> 0:15:45.160 Up, something would happen, and it just kept being pushed back. 0:15:46.080 --> 0:15:49.120 And then I remember in early February, he came home 0:15:49.200 --> 0:15:51.280 and he was a little upset, and he said, you're 0:15:51.320 --> 0:15:53.680 never going to believe it. Heather, but the trial has 0:15:53.760 --> 0:15:57.800 been set and it's one. We're in Italy. 0:16:00.680 --> 0:16:03.320 Jays had to be at the trial. There was no 0:16:03.440 --> 0:16:04.240 way around it. 0:16:05.240 --> 0:16:10.480 I said, wow, okay, well, obviously we're not going to Italy, 0:16:10.560 --> 0:16:12.880 like we've been waiting for this now for two and 0:16:12.880 --> 0:16:16.160 a half years. Like, we'll just postpone the trip. I'll 0:16:16.200 --> 0:16:17.680 cancel the hotels and whatnot. 0:16:18.840 --> 0:16:21.520 They canceled their trip to Italy. When the day of 0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:25.640 the trial came, he came home and he said, yeah, 0:16:25.680 --> 0:16:28.600 things are good. We have a two week adjournment and 0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:32.520 then we're going back and she has to provide me 0:16:32.680 --> 0:16:35.480 with a full repayment schedule for the house and the 0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:39.200 line of credit that she shut me out of. And 0:16:39.400 --> 0:16:44.640 most importantly, instead of having two supervised visits a week, 0:16:44.800 --> 0:16:48.320 they were going to start phasing into unsupervised and then 0:16:48.440 --> 0:16:50.360 one night's sleepover on the weekend. 0:16:50.440 --> 0:16:52.640 And I was like, this is so great. I was like, yes, 0:16:52.800 --> 0:16:55.120 thank you, finally, finally, finally. 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:58.240 It was good news, but terrible timing. 0:16:59.080 --> 0:17:02.560 And then in that two week window, COVID happened and 0:17:02.600 --> 0:17:05.960 the whole world got locked down, which meant no family court. 0:17:08.560 --> 0:17:12.760 It was March twenty twenty and Toronto went into lockdown. Soon, 0:17:12.960 --> 0:17:15.920 Heather and Jason began looking at houses to rent outside 0:17:15.920 --> 0:17:16.359 the city. 0:17:16.920 --> 0:17:20.919 I wanted space and solitude. I found this house for 0:17:21.040 --> 0:17:24.320 rent and it was perfect, and it was on five 0:17:24.320 --> 0:17:30.240 acres of property. It had this beautiful family room with 0:17:30.280 --> 0:17:32.720 a vaulted ceiling and a wood burning fireplace. 0:17:33.440 --> 0:17:37.080 They signed the lease together and moved to Aurora, Ontario. 0:17:37.320 --> 0:17:39.719 It was exactly the refuge they hoped it would be. 0:17:40.320 --> 0:17:45.160 That winter, we had fires almost every day. I love 0:17:45.280 --> 0:17:49.640 that house. I remember one day, a couple weeks after 0:17:49.680 --> 0:17:52.440 we moved in, we were standing on the back deck 0:17:52.480 --> 0:17:56.639 and there's wild turkeys and often you'd see deer and bunnies. 0:17:57.560 --> 0:17:59.240 And he said this would be the best place to 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:03.280 have a backyard, and I was like, yes, it would. 0:18:04.200 --> 0:18:07.240 They started daydreaming about throwing a big celebration at the 0:18:07.280 --> 0:18:13.080 house once COVID restrictions lifted. During the lockdown, Heather and 0:18:13.160 --> 0:18:15.359 Jace had to find new ways to connect with friends 0:18:15.359 --> 0:18:18.600 and family. Heather called her mom often. 0:18:18.760 --> 0:18:22.960 My mom probably back in April, called and she was like, Heath, 0:18:23.080 --> 0:18:26.480 have you seen my bracelet or have you seen this necklace? 0:18:26.520 --> 0:18:30.080 And I'm like no, And I'd get off the phone 0:18:30.240 --> 0:18:32.480 and I'd look at Jace and I'm like, I think 0:18:32.520 --> 0:18:35.879 my mom's starting to like forget things, you know, she 0:18:35.920 --> 0:18:39.480 seems to be misplacing all her stuff. It was just 0:18:39.480 --> 0:18:42.240 like one thing after the other with her, Like my 0:18:42.280 --> 0:18:43.680 grandmother died of dementia. 0:18:46.640 --> 0:18:49.679 Dementia ran in Heather's family, but there wasn't much they 0:18:49.720 --> 0:18:53.600 could do from Afar. Plus, the pandemic had destabilized both 0:18:53.600 --> 0:18:57.120 Heather and Jays financially. He had just started a new 0:18:57.200 --> 0:18:59.440 remote job back in software development. 0:19:00.240 --> 0:19:03.680 He'd gotten this job for Oracle, but even when we 0:19:03.720 --> 0:19:06.119 moved to Aurora and we had to pay the first 0:19:06.119 --> 0:19:09.760 and last month's rent and a security deposit, I ended 0:19:09.800 --> 0:19:11.840 up paying for all of it because he didn't have 0:19:12.000 --> 0:19:15.760 anything saved. How can this be like you're getting Oracle 0:19:15.800 --> 0:19:19.800 paychecks when push came to shove, he just never seemed 0:19:19.800 --> 0:19:20.560 to have money. 0:19:21.880 --> 0:19:25.800 Between his custody battle and COVID, Jace had depleted his savings, 0:19:26.440 --> 0:19:29.000 but what was in his bank account didn't matter to Heather. 0:19:29.720 --> 0:19:32.359 She could support the both of them. The bigger issue 0:19:32.359 --> 0:19:34.960 for her was that she still hadn't met Jase's son. 0:19:36.000 --> 0:19:37.679 I had set up the room for his son in 0:19:37.720 --> 0:19:40.760 the house, and he still kept going two times a 0:19:40.800 --> 0:19:45.840 week on his supervised visits to see his son. I'm 0:19:45.880 --> 0:19:47.600 starting to really resent the situation. 0:19:48.960 --> 0:19:51.480 At the end of twenty twenty, Heather bought a furniture 0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:54.560 and a core business and moved the inventory into their. 0:19:54.400 --> 0:19:57.840 Home, and when we moved to Aurora, Jay started getting 0:19:57.840 --> 0:20:01.520 really into building furniture. I was like, well, that's a 0:20:01.560 --> 0:20:04.320 no brainer. I can sell all that inventory and make 0:20:04.359 --> 0:20:08.800 my investment back tenfold, and we can sell all this furniture. 0:20:10.000 --> 0:20:12.720 Jace was working more and more at Oracle. He was 0:20:12.720 --> 0:20:15.639 coming home late, and when he was home he was 0:20:15.680 --> 0:20:19.360 exhausted from working long hours. He never seemed to have 0:20:19.520 --> 0:20:24.439 energy for Heather or for their new furniture business. The 0:20:24.480 --> 0:20:27.080 couple started getting in fights more often. 0:20:28.080 --> 0:20:33.480 By June of twenty twenty one, I was getting frustrated 0:20:33.520 --> 0:20:36.639 with my life with him because I felt like the 0:20:36.680 --> 0:20:40.560 world's opening up and here we are, and he seems 0:20:40.560 --> 0:20:43.520 to always be working and he never wants to do anything, 0:20:43.760 --> 0:20:49.439 and I just felt very isolated. She wasn't happy, so 0:20:50.040 --> 0:20:52.960 I was like, fuck it, and I said something like, 0:20:53.040 --> 0:20:55.399 you know, if you're not into this relationship, just tell me. 0:20:56.040 --> 0:21:03.120 And then that turned into a pretty escalated, heated argument, 0:21:04.119 --> 0:21:10.800 and he left, and I felt really bad and said, 0:21:10.960 --> 0:21:12.360 do you know, I think I'm going to go down 0:21:12.359 --> 0:21:13.960 to the city for a couple of days just to 0:21:14.000 --> 0:21:15.280 give us a bit of space. 0:21:16.480 --> 0:21:20.320 Heather wanted to actually talk with him. Something was going on, 0:21:21.040 --> 0:21:24.920 but he wasn't giving her anything. After a few days apart, 0:21:25.160 --> 0:21:26.960 Heather headed back to their house. 0:21:28.040 --> 0:21:30.360 And I call him and he said, oh, hey, I'm 0:21:30.400 --> 0:21:33.480 just about to go tea off. I'm like, what, you're 0:21:33.480 --> 0:21:36.159 in golfing and he goes, I'm not quite ready to 0:21:36.200 --> 0:21:37.320 forgive you yet. 0:21:39.920 --> 0:21:44.920 Forgive her for what she hadn't done anything, but Jays 0:21:44.960 --> 0:21:46.520 hung up the phone. 0:21:46.560 --> 0:21:49.240 He finally gets home from golfing and he goes by 0:21:49.280 --> 0:21:51.520 the way, I washed the sheets, the DVA cover still 0:21:51.560 --> 0:21:55.120 in the dryer. I was just crying, like, I don't 0:21:55.200 --> 0:21:58.160 understand what's going on. The more I cried, the more 0:21:58.200 --> 0:22:01.720 he was actually getting kind of angry stranded. I started going, 0:22:01.760 --> 0:22:05.000 this just doesn't seem normal. But I just kept saying, 0:22:05.000 --> 0:22:07.760 you know what, we'll get through it. We love each 0:22:07.760 --> 0:22:13.600 other and we'll get through this. But August twenty twenty 0:22:13.600 --> 0:22:17.480 one was such a brutal month because he just stopped 0:22:17.480 --> 0:22:22.199 coming home. He was claiming he was sleeping in the 0:22:22.280 --> 0:22:25.840 car or sleeping at the office, and he would randomly 0:22:25.880 --> 0:22:28.120 stop by the house to like pick something up. 0:22:28.880 --> 0:22:31.880 Heather had uprooted her life to be with Jase. She'd 0:22:31.880 --> 0:22:35.560 supported him financially for years. She decorated a bedroom for 0:22:35.600 --> 0:22:38.199 his son to stay in, but all of a sudden, 0:22:38.960 --> 0:22:43.119 a switch had flipped. Jayce had discarded her. Heather didn't 0:22:43.160 --> 0:22:43.840 know what to do. 0:22:44.560 --> 0:22:48.560 I've gone through the whole month of August alone, living 0:22:48.560 --> 0:22:53.560 in this big house by myself, and just hurting so badly. 0:22:54.640 --> 0:22:59.160 Every effort I made to mend us, he just spat 0:22:59.440 --> 0:23:02.920 veno and back and it was a really scary time. 0:23:05.880 --> 0:23:08.880 Then one afternoon, Heather was doing work on her laptop. 0:23:09.320 --> 0:23:12.200 When signing into one of her accounts, a screen popped 0:23:12.240 --> 0:23:15.359 up with all of her saved passwords, including the login 0:23:15.480 --> 0:23:19.440 for Jace's email. Heather wondered if his email account might 0:23:19.520 --> 0:23:23.000 hold some of the answers she couldn't get from jas himself, 0:23:23.680 --> 0:23:25.160