Speaker 1: It's topic time. The phone called eight hundred five eight
Speaker 1: five one oh five. Want to join it to the
Speaker 1: discussion with the Breakfast Club. Talk about it morning, everybody
Speaker 1: in CJ and V Charlomagne the guy. We are the
Speaker 1: Breakfast Club. We have Porsche Williams here and we're talking
Speaker 1: open relationships. Now this conversation comes from Omnia. Now Moni
Speaker 1: said she's done with open relationship. She don't want to
Speaker 1: have it no more. So we're asking does this work?
Speaker 1: Have you ever been in open relationship? Never? Never, It's
Speaker 1: don't work for me. No, No, I ain't gotta ask you.
Speaker 1: Charlo Man, I know no, I've never been in an
Speaker 1: old relationship. I don't even know anybody who's ever been
Speaker 1: in one. I'm interested, though, because you know, um, it
Speaker 1: seems to be working for some people. But I wonder
Speaker 1: is it really all right? Well? Oh, you know what,
Speaker 1: I do remember somebody telling me they were in an
Speaker 1: open relationship. Did they say it on the show? I
Speaker 1: don't think they sit it on a show, so I
Speaker 1: can't name them, but she said it didn't work out,
Speaker 1: and it was on the show. They was on the show,
Speaker 1: and they told me that they had She told me
Speaker 1: they had been an open relationship that two men, or
Speaker 1: she dating and he dates. She wanted she was with women. Okay,
Speaker 1: she was with women, and she wanted to continue to
Speaker 1: be with women, and so they ended up make an
Speaker 1: agreement to continue to do that, and it didn't work
Speaker 1: out because, you know, I think she started to get
Speaker 1: emotionally tied with the other woman and he couldn't take it.
Speaker 1: He didn't like it. He thought it was just gonna
Speaker 1: be sex, and so they had to stop just having sex.
Speaker 1: I think most I wouldn't if I would think most
Speaker 1: men would be cool with that. Like, my wife's got
Speaker 1: a girlfriend, you know what I mean, when it's not
Speaker 1: what she'd fall in love with her. Now when you like, okay,
Speaker 1: wait a minute, you really like this person. That girl
Speaker 1: can do stuff with her tongue that you can't do. Well,
Speaker 1: let her teach you. No, no, she can't teach you. Now,
Speaker 1: you can't learn what a woman could do for a woman.
Speaker 1: Most African men like to be with more than one woman.
Speaker 1: Oh hold on, now, it's hold on that. It's a
Speaker 1: religion thing. And my husband is Christian, so you know,
Speaker 1: depending on what their religion is, that maybe what they follow,
Speaker 1: you know, but no, not necessar s not all right,
Speaker 1: Let's go to the phone line. Hello, who's this Nie Agelannie?
Speaker 1: Now tell us about your situation. Yours is very interesting, Yeah,
Speaker 1: y'all actually a couple of years ago. Um, but I'm
Speaker 1: probably I've been in an over relationship but officially for
Speaker 1: about eight years with my husband. But we have been
Speaker 1: living together for the last eight months with my other partner,
Speaker 1: who I've been having an a betrothed part of lation
Speaker 1: process with. I have another baby. Is it a man about?
Speaker 1: That's the same thing. It has to be two two
Speaker 1: black berries men? Yes, two men. So you have two
Speaker 1: men living in your house? Now? Yeah, we all live together,
Speaker 1: but we live we have our own bedroom, so you know,
Speaker 1: in secred spaces at home. We all live together. So
Speaker 1: how do you decide which man you sleep with it
Speaker 1: each night? I sleep by myself. I didn't get a
Speaker 1: camera over the house. Did they run on you? No,
Speaker 1: it's not called team. It's definitely not gonna bad. No,
Speaker 1: not at all. We've never even anything together in that way,
Speaker 1: Ain't she sounds like the I choose complete whoever, I
Speaker 1: choose completement, even if it's downside of the house. Is
Speaker 1: all ethical. I'm honest about I'm not there. Why y'all's
Speaker 1: going on? Because the first can the first my coolthd
Speaker 1: my children's hired because I'm Polly. But I met this
Speaker 1: person right after my toothors hired. For the past three years,
Speaker 1: we've been together. But now I want to have a
Speaker 1: chiwl with him. He doesn't have a child. Oh so
Speaker 1: that's why you want to have a chowder with him?
Speaker 1: And what about the first husband. Did y'all talk about
Speaker 1: having a yowl together? We have two beautiful children, Okay,
Speaker 1: so you want to have one for the for the
Speaker 1: new husband. Why do you explain? Y'all cheering? Y'all got
Speaker 1: too daddy, go to daddy, think kind of woods, Yeah,
Speaker 1: and whole bunch of love. Some kids ain't got no daddy,
Speaker 1: so at least they got two, daddy. What you're gonna
Speaker 1: do when you come on? What you're gonna do when
Speaker 1: you come home one day and you're gonna find both
Speaker 1: of those What you're gonna do when you come on
Speaker 1: one day? What you're gonna do when you come on
Speaker 1: one day and find both of the men in bed?
Speaker 1: Why why you go there, ignorance? I'm not asking, I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm not mad at her. You tell you gotta take
Speaker 1: it there, But see, I'm not mad at it because see,
Speaker 1: most men, when you think of like an open relationship,
Speaker 1: this woman is the goat all right because she has
Speaker 1: actually managed to have two men. So she got her
Speaker 1: first husband to agree with her to have another man.
Speaker 1: Most of the time men say, yeah, we canna have
Speaker 1: an open relationship. Yeah exactly, And that's where I have
Speaker 1: the problem. My husband, my husband, they sell outside of me,
Speaker 1: my partner, they here and there, um, so they have
Speaker 1: the capacity and the ability to date whomever they want to.
Speaker 1: But I'm good, I'm good. They don't have to know
Speaker 1: outside of me as you know as much as too.
Speaker 1: So what about when the new baby comes? Are you
Speaker 1: gonna want more commitment from the second guy? Like? Why
Speaker 1: can't y'all just be polly? What's it called? But I
Speaker 1: am polyamorous, but I don't lack commitment right now? So
Speaker 1: what about can they have other women? Yeah? She said, yeah,
Speaker 1: in relationship outside of me right now? But what if
Speaker 1: she get pregnant? Now we got babies everywhere? How he's
Speaker 1: going to pay for He's had an affect to me.
Speaker 1: We're smart about this we've been doing it for a
Speaker 1: long time. I got a headache. She said, they're smart
Speaker 1: about it. Now, thank you, mama, Ray. That is wow,
Speaker 1: I just got a headache. That's a headache. If she
Speaker 1: would have if she would have stopped that, this is
Speaker 1: I got my first husband, right, I brought my second
Speaker 1: husband and we three are in a relationship. That's it.
Speaker 1: We have a commitment. That's I can't understand it, but okay,
Speaker 1: I got it. But when you say you got three men,
Speaker 1: two men in the house and everybody's still sleep with
Speaker 1: everybody outside of the house, that's a lot. That's a
Speaker 1: lot of sound ties going on. I don't I don't
Speaker 1: even know how she deal with that. Jesus, Brittany, good morning,
Speaker 1: good morning. How are you? I'm good. You were in
Speaker 1: an open relationship, I was what happened? Um, so basically, yeah,
Speaker 1: he and I were dating, but I didn't really care
Speaker 1: about like the occupation. If there were things that he
Speaker 1: was doing that just didn't really fit what I was
Speaker 1: looking for. So I wound up finding my current boyfriend
Speaker 1: while I look in a relationship with and I left
Speaker 1: him for that relationship. Damn did he know about it?
Speaker 1: Did he know that you were still dating. Yeah, he knew.
Speaker 1: I told him when I met my current boyfriend. See
Speaker 1: that's and that's the problem. See, you date one guy,
Speaker 1: you find somebody that's better, and now this guy's cool
Speaker 1: with you dating, and then you leave him. But I
Speaker 1: don't really know if that's considered an open relationship, because
Speaker 1: open relationship, in my mind, what I thought the definition
Speaker 1: was we're committed, but we sleep with other people, but
Speaker 1: we are still always gonna come back home. Well that's
Speaker 1: what she did, but she didn't come back home. She
Speaker 1: was dating, and sounds like he was dating. It was
Speaker 1: dating too, but we just I wound up finding somebody
Speaker 1: who made more sense for me or what I was
Speaker 1: looking for, and it no longer made sense to be
Speaker 1: in that open relationship and continue on. This is everybody's fit.
Speaker 1: This ain't fair. You know what I'm saying. I opened
Speaker 1: the door a little that we supposed to be doing
Speaker 1: this together. You leave me and move on, right, I'm
Speaker 1: saying that ain't right. That's called monkey bar. That's holding
Speaker 1: it on the one bar, that's one relationship and hanging
Speaker 1: on to another one and then letting that one go.
Speaker 1: That's what it's called monkey bar. Exactly. You learn that
Speaker 1: the relationship expert down physical movement looking stupid like a
Speaker 1: little bige monkey. White, little little white monkey, right monkey
Speaker 1: five one, five one. We're talking open relationships? Are you
Speaker 1: in one? Hasn't worked for you? Let's talk about it.
Speaker 1: It's the breakfast Club the morning, call me to the
Speaker 1: breakfast Club topic five five one, wanting everybody in d
Speaker 1: ch n V Charlemagne the guy. We are the breakfast Club.
Speaker 1: We got poorshit williams our co guest host this morning,
Speaker 1: and we're talking open relationships. Now, this comes from Monique,
Speaker 1: who says she's done. She does want to open relationship anymore.
Speaker 1: So we're just asking, are you in one? How is
Speaker 1: it working for you? Hello? Who's this? Hi? Hello? Hello?
Speaker 1: I asked anonymous? Okay, anonymous? We got your name? No, yeah,
Speaker 1: we definitely got your name, but we wouldn't have gonna
Speaker 1: say Amberley, thank you. I was in an open relationship
Speaker 1: and a half a year and our treement was essentially,
Speaker 1: if we're gonna sleep with anybody else, we're gonna let
Speaker 1: each other know ahead of time. Now, I never slept
Speaker 1: with anyone out talking my relationship, not because I don't know.
Speaker 1: We can do what let me? I just didn't want
Speaker 1: to on three different occasions, and they two and a
Speaker 1: half years. I found it a month after the fact
Speaker 1: that he had gone to sex parties and essentially had
Speaker 1: four names. Oh da. So when I mentally decided that
Speaker 1: I was done with a relationship, I met another man
Speaker 1: and who I actually wanted to be with. And a
Speaker 1: month after me and him began a relationship, I told
Speaker 1: this other guy, Hey, word relationship. I've met someone else
Speaker 1: and had this relationships and he was begging to be
Speaker 1: with me in all this, and I was like, well,
Speaker 1: you wanted to be in an open relationship, and now
Speaker 1: the open relationship with the nail in our coffin, Lord
Speaker 1: have mercy. Now that's a real open relationship. Yeah, thank you, mama.
Speaker 1: That sounds like the movies I used to watch. What's
Speaker 1: the movie? The twave movies? They don't end well. I
Speaker 1: ain't seeing nobody have an open relationship in the end.
Speaker 1: Well yet. Hello, who's a Hey? This is Jayton, Good morning.
Speaker 1: Stay's my birthday and rest in peace? Thiggy, Hey, it's
Speaker 1: bow Wow's birthday too, and Chinky too, Hey, happy birthday?
Speaker 1: All right, what's your what's your story? BROBM, So I
Speaker 1: was in an open relationship. Um, and my parents are
Speaker 1: in an open relationship, and my sisters in an open relationship,
Speaker 1: and let me tell you say where y'all live at? Um?
Speaker 1: You know, I think seeing in an open relationship is
Speaker 1: an opportunity to select your communication skill and really learn
Speaker 1: about yourself. Um. But ultimately, whoever your your main partner
Speaker 1: is your main squeeze, you really need to dedicate all
Speaker 1: of your energy towards them as well as finding out
Speaker 1: about yourself. So in a way, it's a way to
Speaker 1: get stronger in my opinion, how old are you? I'm
Speaker 1: twenty four today. Oh so his parents are like our age.
Speaker 1: So your parents, your parents, your mom had dudes in
Speaker 1: the house. I mean they do now, not when I
Speaker 1: was a kid. This is more of a recent thing.
Speaker 1: How do you look at the other dudes that's um
Speaker 1: tapping your mom's cheeks? Jesus? I mean, I personally, the
Speaker 1: way the way I grew up, I don't, I don't
Speaker 1: really see it like that. You know, they're adults. I'm
Speaker 1: an adult now, so like, whatever whatever's happening on their side,
Speaker 1: it's really none of my business. You know. That's true?
Speaker 1: So did you start having your relationship because you knew
Speaker 1: your parents were doing it. So it's like a normal
Speaker 1: thing for y'all because now it's gonna generation Huh. I
Speaker 1: started with the open relationship and they followed you. Oh son,
Speaker 1: he means now now, no, I'm sorry I miscommunicated. Yeah, now,
Speaker 1: so you so you date? I guess you have a
Speaker 1: relationship with a I don't want to be assump assumphious
Speaker 1: man or woman right that I had a previously, I
Speaker 1: had a relationship with a man and a woman. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: you just greedy man. But what what did you say
Speaker 1: to your parents that made them want to open their
Speaker 1: relationship after all these years? Because I'm assuming they've been
Speaker 1: married for twenty four years because they still together. Now,
Speaker 1: what did you what? What'd you say to me? Open
Speaker 1: relationship sound so good? Well, it's my it's my dad
Speaker 1: of my step mom. So I you know, I just
Speaker 1: kind of showed them, you know what it was that
Speaker 1: that made me happy and that made me and my
Speaker 1: little throat are happy. Um yeah, And and they I
Speaker 1: guess they just realize, you know, they need to deflect
Speaker 1: there their communication and such with each other because they
Speaker 1: were struggling so your dad likes that men too. Yes,
Speaker 1: it sounds to me like everybody. It sounds to me
Speaker 1: like everybody's exploring their shadow side. And I think that,
Speaker 1: you know, it is hard to communicate your shadow side,
Speaker 1: but if everybody is, you know, dealing with their shadow
Speaker 1: side side, the shadow side is just like that that
Speaker 1: I don't want to see the darkness, because dark ain't
Speaker 1: the right world, but just those things in you that
Speaker 1: you may not speak to anybody else about, those desires
Speaker 1: you may have like this, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: His dad clearly wanted to be with men. He probably
Speaker 1: never feel like he could talk about it. Yeah, he's
Speaker 1: in it exactly, so not in him and his wife
Speaker 1: can talk about it. It just opens up the communication
Speaker 1: even more so. You so you took your dad out
Speaker 1: with you and turn your dad out so he was
Speaker 1: able to see that. Wow. Yeah, yeah, you don't let
Speaker 1: him tell you to turn your daddy out. He didn't
Speaker 1: turn his daddy out. His daddy been out, okay, he
Speaker 1: just was in. Yeah, I mean yeah, it just sounds
Speaker 1: like everybody in this house is exploring their shadow self,
Speaker 1: you know. And and to give the technical term, it's
Speaker 1: when you are it's the uncivilized even primitive side of
Speaker 1: your nature. And we all have a shadow what's yours?
Speaker 1: What's your shadow side? Um? What the parts of myself
Speaker 1: that I DM unacceptable? Yeah, that's if you could do it,
Speaker 1: If you could approach your wife and say, this is
Speaker 1: what I want to do, and my wife talk about
Speaker 1: the type of what I'm not sharing that with the world.
Speaker 1: Why we're not sharing something that you should keep to yourself,
Speaker 1: having like a shadow side to something your shadow self
Speaker 1: to realize that's part of you. Yes, but you have
Speaker 1: to you have to accept that. You have to accept
Speaker 1: yourself because if you don't, you're denying yourself, even the
Speaker 1: bed part that is very true. In order to my
Speaker 1: shadows side, I'm interested And the way to find is
Speaker 1: you pay attention to your dreams and nightmares. You use
Speaker 1: shadow work prompts in a journal to understand your core
Speaker 1: belief thoughts and feelings. You talk to your therapists our
Speaker 1: counselor about the things that bother you, and you look
Speaker 1: for patterns of behavior that you don't that you don't
Speaker 1: like in yourself. So when do we get the indulge
Speaker 1: in our shadow self? Like, when do I get to
Speaker 1: do these things? I'm gonna find out. I don't even
Speaker 1: know if it's the thing you indulge in. It's just
Speaker 1: the thing that you might want to communicate, because those
Speaker 1: are the things that make you feel bad, right right,
Speaker 1: But that don't necessarily mean you're a bad person just
Speaker 1: because you think about these things. So who are the
Speaker 1: people in your life that you could talk to about
Speaker 1: your shadow self and they don't judge you? Okay, you know,
Speaker 1: probably your sister, Okay, you know, maybe I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm just asking, like, I don't know what my shadow is.
Speaker 1: Is it connected to sex? Is it like, oh, I
Speaker 1: think about murdering people? It might be all of that.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I think the world knows your shadow? What's
Speaker 1: my shadow self? What's my shadow th we got rooms
Speaker 1: on the way for I really don't have a shadow,
Speaker 1: but you do. You admitted that you just don't want
Speaker 1: to tell you. I've explored it. I don't have a show.
Speaker 1: Like your listeners know you well enough that they can
Speaker 1: probably tell you what your shadow self is. I would
Speaker 1: like to know, yeah, I would five eight five one
Speaker 1: or five one. I think you know shout, but only
Speaker 1: a psychologist can tell you that. I think you know
Speaker 1: Charlemagne's shadow side something that he really wants to do,
Speaker 1: but it's scared to let it out. Yeah you think
Speaker 1: you know that. Let's help him reveal his true self.
Speaker 1: We got rumors on the way in the moral of
Speaker 1: the story from this open what's the boy with nobody
Speaker 1: up here? The moral of the story. That don't sound fun.
Speaker 1: I thought y'all gonna make it sound fun. No, don't
Speaker 1: sound like nothing. I want to try. I'd rather just
Speaker 1: we're gonna stay. We're gonna those marriages stay married. That's right,
Speaker 1: stay married. That's what you mean. Absolutely, we got rumors
Speaker 1: on the way. We do. We have some rumors coming up,
Speaker 1: and they are really good, So make sure y'all stay tuned.
Speaker 1: He's gonna say tires. That's what I'm saying. It ain't
Speaker 1: wrought me now, made it up. We're talking tires. When
Speaker 1: we come back. It's the Breakfast Club, come morning, the
Speaker 1: Breakfast Club.