Speaker 1: Oh baby, a baby, I need you, Oh how I
Speaker 1: need you? What to expect? As a production of I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio, I'm your host, Heidi Murkhoff, and I'm a
Speaker 1: mom on a mission, a mission to help you know
Speaker 1: what to expect every step of the way. Sure, sleep
Speaker 1: deprivation comes with a new mom territory, but you might
Speaker 1: not have expected the sleepless nights to start while you're
Speaker 1: still pregnant. From heartburn to leg cramps, assorted aches to
Speaker 1: multiplying pains, midnight bathroom runs, a hopped up metabolism, and
Speaker 1: a watermelon of a belly, it's not surprising you're having
Speaker 1: trouble settling down for a good night's sleep, or any
Speaker 1: night's sleep. It might be good preparation for the sleepless
Speaker 1: nights to will encounter as a new parent. But I'm
Speaker 1: here to say you don't have to take pregnancy insomnia
Speaker 1: lying down or even propped up. Today, we're breaking down
Speaker 1: the most common barriers that stand between you and the
Speaker 1: disease you need, so you can put those pregnancy sleep
Speaker 1: problems to bed once and for all. I'm here with Emma,
Speaker 1: and Emma, I remember that you had quite a few
Speaker 1: sleep problems when you were pregnant with both boys, I
Speaker 1: didn't have any that I can remember, but you you
Speaker 1: had plenty. Yeah. I had these weird issues where I
Speaker 1: couldn't sleep in a bed. I could only sleep in
Speaker 1: a recliner or the couch. On my second pregnancy, I
Speaker 1: literally slept on the couch the whole entire time, and
Speaker 1: then with my first one, I slept on the couch
Speaker 1: or in a pregnancy recliner chair, the glider, the glider. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I had a lot of issues. So how did you
Speaker 1: finally get some sleep? Or did you? I mean, honestly,
Speaker 1: I'm tim Benadryl. My doctor said it was okay, So
Speaker 1: I took Bena drill. That was really helpful, and also
Speaker 1: just giving into the fact that, look, I'm not going
Speaker 1: to stay in the battle night like tossing and turning.
Speaker 1: When if I can get some shut I on the couch,
Speaker 1: just do it. And it kind of sucks though, because
Speaker 1: this was going to be the last time I was
Speaker 1: gonna be able to like have my husband to myself,
Speaker 1: so it would have been nice in retrospect to have
Speaker 1: spent that time with him. But look, a girl's got
Speaker 1: to sleep, so yeah, girl's gotta sleep, and you know
Speaker 1: the other thing, when you're pregnant, he's always going to
Speaker 1: be freezing cold because you're always so hot that you're
Speaker 1: turning on the A C. And he's got to take
Speaker 1: one for the team. And yeah, he's got to take
Speaker 1: one for the team. I'm always a little hot, though
Speaker 1: I'm running hot all the time, so we argue about
Speaker 1: that anyway, Actually I do too. Okay, mom, let's get
Speaker 1: real about pregnancy sleep. He feels so exhausted when you're pregnant,
Speaker 1: yet you can't sleep. How ironic. What is going on
Speaker 1: inside our bodies that make sleeping sometimes seem impossible. Well,
Speaker 1: there are really too many things to count, but they're
Speaker 1: all related to baking your baby bun. And since we're there,
Speaker 1: let's start with the oven temperature, right. Your internal thermost
Speaker 1: is always set to overheated when you're pregnant, so even
Speaker 1: when the heat's off, you're still heating for two And
Speaker 1: then there's the pregnancy hormones that increase the amount of RAM,
Speaker 1: which is rapid eye movement sleep that you have. And
Speaker 1: that's the dream sleep, and that's the sleep that's most
Speaker 1: easily interrupted by those endless runs to the bathroom. Another
Speaker 1: pregnancy perk and by all those other pregnancy symptoms that
Speaker 1: can keep you up all night, like congestion and that
Speaker 1: nagging post nasal drip cough and heartburn and hip pains
Speaker 1: and leg cramps and itchy skin. Oh, and that racing
Speaker 1: mind that you have trouble switching off. And wait, did
Speaker 1: I mention trying to get comfortable? Yes, I had that
Speaker 1: post nasal drip. It was awful with a reflex too,
Speaker 1: when you're a little bit nauseous and then you have
Speaker 1: that gross junks slipping down your throat. Not a good time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's very, very common when you're pregnant as a postnais
Speaker 1: little drip cough. So you say bedtime routine is not
Speaker 1: just for babies, Explain what you mean, Well, I say
Speaker 1: that bedtime routines are for everybody. The relaxing repetition of
Speaker 1: the same soothing activities in the same order at the
Speaker 1: same time every single night can help your body in
Speaker 1: your mind apply the breaks gradually instead of trying to
Speaker 1: slam on the brakes. So trying to go straight from
Speaker 1: a hundred to zero. It doesn't work for babies. It
Speaker 1: definitely doesn't work for toddlers, and it definitely doesn't work
Speaker 1: for mommies. So take at least an hour before bed
Speaker 1: to unwind and make your routine boringly predictable, just like
Speaker 1: you would with a baby or a toddler. A warm bath,
Speaker 1: soothing music, a light bedtime snack, maybe a BackRub, and
Speaker 1: if you're in the own, the ultimate nightcap sex or
Speaker 1: solo sex, either one whatever relaxes you. You know, it's
Speaker 1: actually a really good dress rehearsal for when you have
Speaker 1: the baby. And I'm not mad at the sex part.
Speaker 1: Who could be? Please don't tell me we're not supposed
Speaker 1: to do screen time before bed. Don't tell me this, mom. Well,
Speaker 1: I think I've already told you like a thousand times.
Speaker 1: But yeah, for a better night's sleep, you've got a
Speaker 1: ween off the screen, your phone, your iPad at least
Speaker 1: an hour before you turn in, because the light from
Speaker 1: the screen does mess with your sleep by suppressing your
Speaker 1: levels of melotonin, which is the hormone that regulates your
Speaker 1: internal clock, which is you know, a k your circadian rhythms.
Speaker 1: And it's really a double whammy because screen time at
Speaker 1: that time not only keeps you from falling asleep, but
Speaker 1: it can keep you from staying asleep. During the night.
Speaker 1: Same thing with toddlers, just in case you're wondering. And
Speaker 1: I know that I am guilty of not falling this
Speaker 1: particular rule because I'm always, you know, on Instagram with
Speaker 1: my mom buddies. But then again, I'm not pregnant, and
Speaker 1: when I was pregnant, there were no electronic devices. I'm
Speaker 1: pretty sure there was electricity even back then, but there
Speaker 1: were no electronic devices, and maybe that's why I slept
Speaker 1: so well. Of course there was electricity, but there are
Speaker 1: apps that you can get and you can go app happy.
Speaker 1: When it comes to meditation, white noise apps, a calm app,
Speaker 1: maybe we'll call it a calm mom app. Whatever gets
Speaker 1: the job done. You know, that's literally what I do.
Speaker 1: I use a white noise machine on my phone and
Speaker 1: my headphones, and it not only calms me, but it
Speaker 1: helps me sleep. And I'm not pregnant right now, so
Speaker 1: I don't know how you sleep with headphones on, though
Speaker 1: I can't sleep without them. It's like dogs in the thunder,
Speaker 1: It's like my thunder Buddy blanket basics. All those for
Speaker 1: pregnant women. Okay, speaking of melotonin, are there other natural
Speaker 1: remedies that can help with pregnancy insomnia. It's better to
Speaker 1: produce your own melotonin than it is to pop it
Speaker 1: during pregnancy because most natural remedies haven't been studied for
Speaker 1: safety during pregnancy, and that includes melotone, and so don't
Speaker 1: try that at home or other home remedies at home,
Speaker 1: at least not without your doctor's or midwife's okay. And
Speaker 1: you can also ask your doctor midwife about taking a
Speaker 1: magnesium supplement or using a magnesium spray before bed. Magnesium
Speaker 1: is a natural muscle relaxant that can ease leg cramps
Speaker 1: and bonus points, and I hope you're paying attention it
Speaker 1: can also ease constipation. Plus because it's a muscle relax
Speaker 1: and it might help with sleep. And something else that's
Speaker 1: been around for generations warm milk, and your mom doesn't
Speaker 1: have to be there to give it to you, but
Speaker 1: warm milk can actually induce sleepiness. And a light snack
Speaker 1: to go with it, like a banana or some almonds.
Speaker 1: Cheese and crackers are another great option that's going to
Speaker 1: keep your blood sugar on an even keel during the
Speaker 1: night and help you catch those e'se. I'm down for
Speaker 1: anything that's going to help with constipation on the constipation queen.
Speaker 1: So I've heard, yeah, what about lavender? Although lavender makes
Speaker 1: me a little gaggy, I personally lavender would keep me
Speaker 1: up because I don't like the smell of it, but
Speaker 1: it may help you smell your way to sleep. It's
Speaker 1: known for sleep inducing properties. But if you're going to
Speaker 1: try lavender, use a lotion before bed, or you know,
Speaker 1: stick a little sachet into your pillowcase. But don't use
Speaker 1: straight up essential oils when you're pregnant. Any of them
Speaker 1: you just stay away from because they're super strong and
Speaker 1: can make you queasy. Yeah, depending on your queasy level. Okay,
Speaker 1: so what should we take and not take to help
Speaker 1: pregnant moms sleep better? Okay, so you saw this coming,
Speaker 1: but you gotta ask your doctor or midwife if you
Speaker 1: can't count how many sheep you've counted and you still
Speaker 1: can't catch your disease. There are some sleep aids that
Speaker 1: are considered safe over the counter. Unisalm is what's often
Speaker 1: used for morning sickness in combination with B six and
Speaker 1: it's considered safe, so it's a safe go to for sleep,
Speaker 1: though you might be drowsy in the morning. Just make
Speaker 1: sure there are no other added ingredients that might not
Speaker 1: be pregnancy safe, like pain relievers. You always got to
Speaker 1: read the labels on over the counter medications because it
Speaker 1: might say sleep aid, but then it's got other medications
Speaker 1: added to it, like advil or something like that. And
Speaker 1: there are prescription medications that are considered safer occasional use,
Speaker 1: but of course you guess it. You gotta check with
Speaker 1: your obie or your midwife before you pop them. Even
Speaker 1: if you have a prescription lying around from a different time,
Speaker 1: always make sure it's safe to take first. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: was on team Benadrul, but my doctor said it was okay,
Speaker 1: and Benadrul's is considered okay. You know, of course, only
Speaker 1: use it when you absolutely need to use it, and
Speaker 1: check with your doctor. You're always telling me not to
Speaker 1: drink coffee before bed. Of course I don't listen. Of
Speaker 1: course you don't listen. What else is new, But I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say it again. Catheine stays in your system for
Speaker 1: east eight hours, and that can keep you buzz when
Speaker 1: you're trying to unwine. You've got to either switch to
Speaker 1: decaf in the afternoon or just drink your morning Joe
Speaker 1: and not your afternoon Joe and even things like dark
Speaker 1: chocolate or energy drinks. Have them early in the day
Speaker 1: if you're going to have them. I had to pee
Speaker 1: all night when I was pregnant. Well, join the pregnancy club,
Speaker 1: and actually that symptom was a keeper for me, Like
Speaker 1: I still have to be all night. But it's actually
Speaker 1: not a bad idea to limit your fluids before you
Speaker 1: turn in for the night. Um not to say that
Speaker 1: you should not drink if you're thirsty, but you don't
Speaker 1: want to guzzle a thirty two ounces water bottle before
Speaker 1: you get into bed, because that's just asking for trouble.
Speaker 1: And coffee is a diuretic, so that's another good reason
Speaker 1: to skip coffee before bed. I had to pee obviously
Speaker 1: a lot during my pregnancy, but I had so much
Speaker 1: blood flow in my vagina it made it hard to sleep.
Speaker 1: In the first trimester, I felt like I was like
Speaker 1: a fourteen year old boy, but I also felt like
Speaker 1: I had to pee, but it was like blood flow,
Speaker 1: so I didn't have to pee, but my vagina made
Speaker 1: me feel like I had to pee. Is that normal?
Speaker 1: First of all, you could have just had some sex
Speaker 1: in my sick and pregnancy. I did, but not that
Speaker 1: would have taken care of it, but it doesn't take
Speaker 1: care of it. That's the thing. It's just never ending.
Speaker 1: It's like a freaking vicious cycle. No, that's true. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it is that full feeling that you just can't relieve
Speaker 1: no matter what you do. But it's always worth a shot.
Speaker 1: I'll take one of for the team. I'll have sex.
Speaker 1: What about positions in bed, No, mom relacks, not that kind,
Speaker 1: but the kind that can help us sleep better with
Speaker 1: our big bumps. Well, anything goes in the first four
Speaker 1: months position wise, whether you're talking about sex or you're
Speaker 1: talking about sleep. It's after four months when back sleeping
Speaker 1: puts the weight of your growing baby and your uterus
Speaker 1: flat on your major arteries and belly sleeping becomes about
Speaker 1: as comfortable as sleeping on a melon or basketball. So
Speaker 1: it's smarter to pick a side either side, although the
Speaker 1: left side is considered optimum for circulation. Propping yourself on
Speaker 1: your side with pillows and body pillows. They have pregnancy pillows.
Speaker 1: Any pillow really will help you feel more comfortable, relatively comfortable,
Speaker 1: and also help keep you propped on your side. And
Speaker 1: it's gonna take them getting used to. If you're a
Speaker 1: confirmed back sleeper or belly sleeper. But I was lucky
Speaker 1: because I'm a lifelong side sleeper and actually my left side,
Speaker 1: so it never bothered me to have to sleep on
Speaker 1: my side. Same say yay yeay, amma. You had some
Speaker 1: favorite sleep accessories right that you couldn't live without yet,
Speaker 1: So it was nice to have the body pregnancy pillow
Speaker 1: because when I was sleeping on the couch, I kind
Speaker 1: of felt like I had my man with me. I
Speaker 1: could put my leg up on it. It felt really good.
Speaker 1: And didn't you also use a fan? You always use
Speaker 1: a fan. Oh, I need a fan to sleep. I
Speaker 1: need some cold air blowing in my face. My husband
Speaker 1: loves it. Yeah, and it helps with circulation anyway, because
Speaker 1: you get kind of stuffy when you're pregnant, so that
Speaker 1: helps a lot. Right, I was always stuffy, and I
Speaker 1: always had bloody noses. That is another episode entirely, but yes,
Speaker 1: super common, super common. Okay, So I sometimes wake up
Speaker 1: on my back in middle of night. Should I be worried?
Speaker 1: Should I call my doctor? Should I be having a meltdown? No?
Speaker 1: But I actually get asked this constantly. I can't ever
Speaker 1: do a Q and A without somebody asking me this,
Speaker 1: and I hear this a lot also from dad's because
Speaker 1: dads tend to get panicked when they find their partner
Speaker 1: in the middle of the night on her back or
Speaker 1: on her belly. So no harm done, Absolutely, no harm done.
Speaker 1: Just flip back to your side and pick up where
Speaker 1: you left off. Because you can't control your sleep position
Speaker 1: when you're sleeping, it's just not possible, So don't stress it.
Speaker 1: How can you help your heartburn? I know you didn't
Speaker 1: have it, but I did a few things. Remember all
Speaker 1: the pillows that you were using to stay propped up
Speaker 1: on your side, You've got to add some more and
Speaker 1: you've got to prop yourself up to so on your side,
Speaker 1: but also up because being in a more upright position
Speaker 1: uses gravity to keep those gas strict juices where they belong,
Speaker 1: which is in your stomach, so that they don't back
Speaker 1: up and cause that yucky reflux that can keep you
Speaker 1: up at night. And it also being propped up can
Speaker 1: help with that congestion that pregnant women are prone to
Speaker 1: and snoring. Pregnant women tend to snore somewhat. But by
Speaker 1: the way, if you're snoring a lot, if your partner
Speaker 1: comments on it every morning, like you were snoring like
Speaker 1: a truck driver. Then you should check with your doctor
Speaker 1: because it might need monitoring. But if you're feeling the
Speaker 1: burned big time, definitely eat dinner at least a few
Speaker 1: hours before you turn in for the night. And when
Speaker 1: you're adding that light bedtime snack, which is absolutely a must,
Speaker 1: switch the warm milk to cold almond milk because that's
Speaker 1: super soothing for heartburn. And what about hip pain? Oh, yes,
Speaker 1: the joys keep coming. Don't say, here's where the propping
Speaker 1: and pillows come up again. And you should always lie
Speaker 1: on the hip that doesn't hurt as much, even if
Speaker 1: it's your right side, and always try wearing a bump
Speaker 1: support that can take some of the pressure off your
Speaker 1: hips and your back. Okay, so what can women do
Speaker 1: to prevent light cramps and restless leg syndrome? I mean,
Speaker 1: this is something I can relate to because I had
Speaker 1: horrible rls not only in my legs but in my arms,
Speaker 1: by my elbows. It was horrible. It was like this
Speaker 1: feeling you can't escape and it's actually probably one of
Speaker 1: my least favorite parts of being pregnant. Wow, that's saying
Speaker 1: a lot. So you know, leg cramps can definitely cramp
Speaker 1: your sleeping style. The best way to relieve a light cramp.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you've got leg cramps, but lots
Speaker 1: and lots of moms at them and when they hit,
Speaker 1: instead of pointing your toes down, you should flex your
Speaker 1: toes up point towards your nose. You can do that
Speaker 1: before you turn in for the night to try to
Speaker 1: prevent the light cramps. So you can also do it
Speaker 1: if a light cramp hits in the middle of the night.
Speaker 1: Standing on a cold surface if you have one handy
Speaker 1: can also relieve a light cramp. And taking that magnesium
Speaker 1: supplement that we talked about before bed can help, as
Speaker 1: well as that warm milk and skip carbonated drinks before
Speaker 1: bed because they contain a lot of phosphorus which can
Speaker 1: make light cramps more common and now restless leg syndrome
Speaker 1: is a little trickier. It's less common, but some moms
Speaker 1: have it, you know, all the time, not just when
Speaker 1: they're pregnant. But there are medications that you can't take ordinarily,
Speaker 1: that you can't take during pregnancy, of course, and it's
Speaker 1: that creepy crawley feeling. It's on your legs, your arms,
Speaker 1: you had it even on your elbows. You can try
Speaker 1: keeping an eye on your diet to see if you
Speaker 1: can figure out any triggers in your diet. For some
Speaker 1: moms it's carbs, maybe it's caffeine. And you can also
Speaker 1: try all the leg cramp tricks just to see if
Speaker 1: any of them work. Is pregnancy insomnia really Nature's way
Speaker 1: of prepping you for sleep deprived months ahead? We knew
Speaker 1: this a long time ago, but mother Nature has a
Speaker 1: pretty twisted sense of humor and something. But whether it's
Speaker 1: her intention to prepare you for your new parent days
Speaker 1: or something that she just didn't fully think out, it's
Speaker 1: definitely true. So but the time delivery comes, you will
Speaker 1: have forgotten what it was like to sleep eight hours
Speaker 1: in a row, uninterrupted or as you'll call it in
Speaker 1: a few months when you start calling me for baby
Speaker 1: sleep training advice, sleep through the night or STN. See,
Speaker 1: everything's got an acronym when you're pregnant or you're a parent.
Speaker 1: So are you ever going to recover that sounds sleep skill? Maybe?
Speaker 1: Maybe not. There's always more irony, and here it is.
Speaker 1: Some moms actually find that they lose the ability to
Speaker 1: sleep soundly, and even when their baby starts sleeping like
Speaker 1: a dream, and it will happen one day the moms
Speaker 1: are light sleepers for life. I know that definitely happened
Speaker 1: to me. I'm still a light sleeper. And even more
Speaker 1: irony if you fast forward, because that baby that you
Speaker 1: couldn't get to sleep, couldn't get to bed one day,
Speaker 1: will become a teenager who you can't drag out of
Speaker 1: bed when it's time for school in the morning. Guilty. So, Emma,
Speaker 1: do you have any suggestions advice for exhausted pregnant women.
Speaker 1: It's tough because I always tell my friends and my
Speaker 1: friends online. I always say sleep while you can, but
Speaker 1: it's a double edged sword because you can't right. Honestly,
Speaker 1: it is actually really good practice for like never sleeping again.
Speaker 1: But if you can get a few season before the baby,
Speaker 1: do it anyway you can safely. You know. One thing
Speaker 1: I think is super important is getting an exercise during
Speaker 1: the day, whether it's just a walk before dinner or
Speaker 1: something like that. Getting that exercise can help you sleep
Speaker 1: a lot better. It can give you energy during the
Speaker 1: day and help you sleep better at night. But the
Speaker 1: one thing you don't want to do is exercise too
Speaker 1: close to bedtime, because that can wire you. And maybe
Speaker 1: the most important thing of all is not stressing about
Speaker 1: not sleeping, right, Remember I mean you said that you
Speaker 1: just didn't toss in turn about it. You got out
Speaker 1: of bed and you slept on the damn recliner. Sometimes
Speaker 1: that's what it takes. I actually, when you were talking
Speaker 1: about counting sheep, I remember trying that. I try to
Speaker 1: count sheep. That's how desperate I was. And once you
Speaker 1: start obsessing about it and you start going into that
Speaker 1: downward spiral of like, oh my gosh, I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: up at five am and oh my gosh, my gosh,
Speaker 1: then you're just never going to sleep. Don't sweat it.
Speaker 1: You've got plenty of other reasons to sweat. Like you're
Speaker 1: hopped up to the tabolism exactly. Don't let's sleep get
Speaker 1: you down. No, who baby belof, my baby belof. I
Speaker 1: need you, Oh how I need you. Thanks for listening.
Speaker 1: Remember I'm always here for you. What to Expect is
Speaker 1: always here for you. We're all in this together. For
Speaker 1: more on what you heard on today's episode, visit what
Speaker 1: to Expect dot com slash podcast. You can also check
Speaker 1: out what to Expect when you're expecting, What to Expect
Speaker 1: the first Year and the What to Expect app, and
Speaker 1: we want to hear from you. Connect with us on
Speaker 1: our community message board or on our social media. You
Speaker 1: can find me at Heidie Murkoff and Emma at Emma
Speaker 1: Being w t E and of course at What to Expect.
Speaker 1: Baby Love is performed by Riley Peterer. What to Expect
Speaker 1: is a production of I Heart Radio. From more shows
Speaker 1: from I heart Radio check out the I heart Radio app,
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Speaker 1: In my arms right, don't you stay? Nija Knija, Baby Baby,