1
00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:03,760
Speaker 1: All right, guys, time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And

2
00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:07,320
Speaker 1: if you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,

3
00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:11,080
Speaker 1: and more. Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM

4
00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:14,600
Speaker 1: dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be

5
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:18,360
Speaker 1: reading your letter live on the air, just like we're

6
00:00:18,360 --> 00:00:20,560
Speaker 1: gonna read this one right here, right now. Never know

7
00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:22,840
Speaker 1: it could hold on tight. We got it for you

8
00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:26,440
Speaker 1: here at ease, the Strawberry Letter. Thank you, nephew. The

9
00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,880
Speaker 1: secret is bound to come out now. Dear Stephen Shirley,

10
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:32,680
Speaker 1: I'm a thirty six year old man and my wife

11
00:00:32,680 --> 00:00:35,800
Speaker 1: and I split up almost two years ago. She moved

12
00:00:35,840 --> 00:00:38,800
Speaker 1: on and as dating someone she met at church. She

13
00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:41,400
Speaker 1: just had a baby a month ago, and she kept

14
00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:44,479
Speaker 1: it from me for two weeks. I found out after

15
00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:47,479
Speaker 1: my pops told me. He said she sent him pictures

16
00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:49,920
Speaker 1: of her infant daughter, and my sister went to visit

17
00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:52,600
Speaker 1: the baby a few days ago. My dad said, my

18
00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:56,120
Speaker 1: sister's kids are in love with the baby already, and

19
00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:59,520
Speaker 1: she's the cutest little thing. Ever. I call this woman

20
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,200
Speaker 1: to see if it was really true, because I was

21
00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:05,399
Speaker 1: told she couldn't have any more children. I told her

22
00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:07,520
Speaker 1: how hurt I was the day I found out from

23
00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:10,680
Speaker 1: my pops. She and I have two sons, and after

24
00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:13,840
Speaker 1: our second son was born, her doctor said she couldn't

25
00:01:13,880 --> 00:01:17,160
Speaker 1: have any more children. I accepted it and was happy

26
00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:20,040
Speaker 1: with my sons, but I always wanted to have one

27
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,840
Speaker 1: more child, a daughter, to spoil rotten. She told me

28
00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:26,720
Speaker 1: that the baby was a surprise, and she apologized for

29
00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:29,480
Speaker 1: the way I found out. She called her daughter a

30
00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:34,400
Speaker 1: miracle baby and a blessing. My heart was broken, and

31
00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:37,400
Speaker 1: what makes matters worse is that her daughter was born

32
00:01:37,560 --> 00:01:41,200
Speaker 1: on my birthday. How crazy is that? I told her

33
00:01:41,240 --> 00:01:43,600
Speaker 1: I would love to see the baby and meet her

34
00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:47,320
Speaker 1: new boyfriend. She said that wouldn't be possible, and then

35
00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:50,320
Speaker 1: I had to remind her of the wild night we

36
00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:54,200
Speaker 1: had almost a year ago, when we slipped up and

37
00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:58,120
Speaker 1: had unprotected sex three times and one night. I told

38
00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:00,720
Speaker 1: her I have every right to see the baby because

39
00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:03,600
Speaker 1: she might be my child. She doesn't want her boyfriend

40
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:07,880
Speaker 1: to know, but it's bound to come out. I want

41
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:10,920
Speaker 1: to get a paternity test. Oh did I mention that

42
00:02:10,960 --> 00:02:14,120
Speaker 1: our divorce is not final? Should I let her boyfriend

43
00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:20,760
Speaker 1: know what's up and get a DNA test? Who? I

44
00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,680
Speaker 1: don't know? But you sound like you don't believe your wife.

45
00:02:25,919 --> 00:02:28,880
Speaker 1: You sound like that you know. What she said about

46
00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:32,480
Speaker 1: the baby being a surprise and a miracle baby, you

47
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:36,920
Speaker 1: know is not true. Nor do you accept her apology

48
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:40,320
Speaker 1: for the way you found out, And based on that,

49
00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:43,360
Speaker 1: I don't think she was deliberately trying to break your heart.

50
00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:46,799
Speaker 1: You said your heartbroken. It's your right and no one

51
00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:49,800
Speaker 1: can stop you from getting a paternity test but your wife.

52
00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:53,120
Speaker 1: But do you really really want to do that or

53
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:57,200
Speaker 1: are you just bitter? You know, ideally I would love

54
00:02:57,240 --> 00:02:59,760
Speaker 1: to say, yes, get a DNA test, find out if

55
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,080
Speaker 1: the order as yours, and if by chance she is

56
00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:05,240
Speaker 1: you guys could all live happily ever after. But you

57
00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:07,520
Speaker 1: know that's not going to happen. That's not real life.

58
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:10,480
Speaker 1: It's not reality. I think your wife will do anything,

59
00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:13,160
Speaker 1: I'm sure to keep her boyfriend from finding out. She

60
00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:15,800
Speaker 1: doesn't want him to know this that you and that

61
00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:18,760
Speaker 1: the two of you had a tryst, you know, about

62
00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:24,680
Speaker 1: a year ago and m and she totally for sure

63
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:27,480
Speaker 1: does not want him to know that the baby might

64
00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:31,520
Speaker 1: be yours. Yeah, she should have waited until the divorce

65
00:03:31,639 --> 00:03:34,400
Speaker 1: was final, but obviously you even said in the letter

66
00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:37,480
Speaker 1: that she had moved on. She moved on from you,

67
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:40,040
Speaker 1: and she was just waiting for the final papers. You,

68
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:42,520
Speaker 1: on the other hand, do not seem to have moved

69
00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:45,280
Speaker 1: on at all. I mean listen. Is not your place

70
00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:48,200
Speaker 1: to tell her, man, what is up in this situation?

71
00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:52,160
Speaker 1: Please know that I think you should continue to enjoy

72
00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:56,280
Speaker 1: your sons until or unless you're soon to be ex

73
00:03:56,280 --> 00:04:01,280
Speaker 1: wife changes her mind, okay, or else You're gonna just

74
00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:05,680
Speaker 1: it's gonna be confusion and mess. Confusion and mess, Steve

75
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:09,520
Speaker 1: more mess. I don't the subject is the secret is

76
00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:13,240
Speaker 1: about to come the secret it's bound to come out. Now.

77
00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:23,080
Speaker 1: I don't understand you, sir writing this letter. I mean, man,

78
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:30,280
Speaker 1: what's bro? Bro? What's what's wrong with you? I mean

79
00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:35,719
Speaker 1: you just you know you've heard the saying Hell hath

80
00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:39,839
Speaker 1: no fury like a woman scorn? Now this is you

81
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:44,640
Speaker 1: all day? Man, I don't understand better. Now your ex

82
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:49,480
Speaker 1: and y'all split up almost two years ago. She moved

83
00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:54,839
Speaker 1: on and it's dating somebody else. Okay, got it that

84
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:58,000
Speaker 1: she met at church. She had a baby month ago.

85
00:04:58,680 --> 00:05:00,520
Speaker 1: She kept it from you for two week. She don't

86
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:05,080
Speaker 1: owe you nothing. She don't owe you nothing. I found

87
00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:07,520
Speaker 1: out after your My pops told me. He said she

88
00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:10,320
Speaker 1: sent him pictures or her infant daughter, and my sister

89
00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:13,200
Speaker 1: wanted to visit the baby a few days ago. My

90
00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:15,680
Speaker 1: dad said, my sister's kids are in love with the

91
00:05:15,680 --> 00:05:18,599
Speaker 1: baby already, and she's the cutest little thing ever. I

92
00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:20,880
Speaker 1: called a woman to see if it was really true. No,

93
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:23,960
Speaker 1: the woman is your ex because I told her she

94
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:27,159
Speaker 1: couldn't I was told she couldn't have any more children. Well,

95
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:29,039
Speaker 1: she said that the doctor told her it was a

96
00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:34,000
Speaker 1: miracle baby, and you know that was it. But you

97
00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:38,719
Speaker 1: wanted to have one more child, so you accepted it,

98
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:42,360
Speaker 1: happy with your sons, but you always wanted just one child,

99
00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:46,159
Speaker 1: a daughter. So you can spoil rotten now. The lady

100
00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:49,320
Speaker 1: told you that the baby wasn't surprised, and she apologized

101
00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:52,400
Speaker 1: for the way she found out, But she said that

102
00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:55,440
Speaker 1: the baby is a miracle baby. That's true. My heart

103
00:05:55,600 --> 00:06:02,240
Speaker 1: was broken, Why doc, right there? My heart was broken. Dog,

104
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:06,440
Speaker 1: you are y'all have split up two years ago. See

105
00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:09,960
Speaker 1: here's a part I don't like about this letter. He's

106
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:16,640
Speaker 1: not saying what he says. See that's not in the letter. Right. See,

107
00:06:17,839 --> 00:06:21,599
Speaker 1: something went wrong to cause y'all to be split up

108
00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:24,599
Speaker 1: over two years ago. When we come back, we're gonna

109
00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:28,839
Speaker 1: discuss this. But but, but he's only gonna get worse

110
00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:31,560
Speaker 1: with what he's gonna say in this letter. So this

111
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:36,760
Speaker 1: little scorn guy sounds a bit bitter like Shirley Say,

112
00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:41,000
Speaker 1: who would talk about it? When you come back? All right, Steve,

113
00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:43,839
Speaker 1: we'll have part two of your response coming up at

114
00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:48,840
Speaker 1: after the hour. Subject of today's Strawberry letter, The secret

115
00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:51,200
Speaker 1: is bound to come out now, and we'll get back

116
00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:56,240
Speaker 1: into it right after this. You're listening to show, all right,

117
00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:59,159
Speaker 1: Come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject

118
00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:01,880
Speaker 1: the secret it's bound to come out now. You know,

119
00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:05,120
Speaker 1: this guy split up with his wife of almost two years.

120
00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:07,880
Speaker 1: She had moved on and started dating somebody she met

121
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,320
Speaker 1: at the church. She didn't got pregnant and had a

122
00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:14,080
Speaker 1: baby two weeks ago. Didn't tell him, She ain't obligated

123
00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:17,200
Speaker 1: to tell him nothing. But obviously you ain't close to

124
00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:19,880
Speaker 1: the woman, because how is a woman pregnant for nine

125
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:23,080
Speaker 1: months and she got your two sons. You ain't been

126
00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:25,520
Speaker 1: over there, You ain't seen the boys, you ain't picked

127
00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:28,920
Speaker 1: them up. You couldn't tell she was pregnant so she man.

128
00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:32,640
Speaker 1: So it's something else going on, because for nine months

129
00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:35,760
Speaker 1: she ain't been had, so for at least two months

130
00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:38,960
Speaker 1: she had to be showing. So I don't know how

131
00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:41,320
Speaker 1: you've been picking up your sons or getting your visitation

132
00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:45,000
Speaker 1: with your boys and not noticed that this woman was pregnant.

133
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,559
Speaker 1: So that right, there is a gap in the letter

134
00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:50,920
Speaker 1: for me. Now a woman has the baby, and send

135
00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,920
Speaker 1: some picture to your dad and your sister and your

136
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,000
Speaker 1: sons is in love with the baby already. Now you

137
00:07:56,080 --> 00:08:01,440
Speaker 1: always wanted a baby girl, So now you're mad, you heartbroken.

138
00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:05,040
Speaker 1: And she told you that it was a miracle baby.

139
00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:07,240
Speaker 1: Doctor told you she couldn't have the doctors told you

140
00:08:07,240 --> 00:08:09,120
Speaker 1: she couldn't have a more baby what she had one.

141
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:13,280
Speaker 1: So the baby was a surprised and so now as

142
00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:16,119
Speaker 1: a miracle baby and a blessing, my heart was broken.

143
00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:19,120
Speaker 1: What makes matters worse is that her daughter was born

144
00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:25,760
Speaker 1: on my birthday? How crazy is that? It's called coincidence? Though, y'all,

145
00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:30,040
Speaker 1: do you know how many people born on your birthday? Yeah?

146
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:33,440
Speaker 1: Any idea? How many people got the same birthday you got?

147
00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:38,200
Speaker 1: Now you trip it? How crazy is that? I told

148
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,040
Speaker 1: her I'd love to see the baby and meet her

149
00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:46,000
Speaker 1: new boyfriend. Man, what she don't owe you that? She

150
00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:49,200
Speaker 1: said that wouldn't be possible. And then I had to

151
00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:52,000
Speaker 1: remind her of the wild night we had almost a

152
00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:55,880
Speaker 1: year ago when we slipped up and had unprotected sex

153
00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:59,400
Speaker 1: three times in one night over a year ago. Dog,

154
00:08:59,559 --> 00:09:03,440
Speaker 1: due to humbles, do the numbers. Now you're trying to

155
00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:07,559
Speaker 1: make something out enough? I told her I have every

156
00:09:07,679 --> 00:09:10,120
Speaker 1: right to see the baby because she might be mine.

157
00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:14,160
Speaker 1: Might and is is two big ass differences. She don't

158
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:17,400
Speaker 1: owe you nothing. She ain't ask him for child support

159
00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:20,160
Speaker 1: or none of that. I have every right because the

160
00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:23,120
Speaker 1: baby might be mine, Dough, what's wrong with you? What

161
00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:26,080
Speaker 1: did y'all do to even be in line for this divorce?

162
00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:29,000
Speaker 1: And now you sitting up and hear you so damn

163
00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:33,080
Speaker 1: hurt and bitter. I want to meet the baby and

164
00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:37,319
Speaker 1: the boyfriend that you ain't her daddy? What dog? You

165
00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:40,960
Speaker 1: her ex? She don't owe you nothing? I told her,

166
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,040
Speaker 1: I got every right to see the baby. She doesn't

167
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:46,360
Speaker 1: want her boyfriend to know. But it's bound to come out.

168
00:09:46,440 --> 00:09:51,320
Speaker 1: How it is bound to come out? How is it

169
00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:54,920
Speaker 1: bound to come out? Dog? I want to get a

170
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:58,640
Speaker 1: paternity test? Oh did I mentioned that our divorce is

171
00:09:58,679 --> 00:10:02,719
Speaker 1: not final. Yes it is. It's over. Bro. Let me

172
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:09,040
Speaker 1: explain something. Let me tell you something. The divorce is over.

173
00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:12,319
Speaker 1: You see. Look, man, when people get a divorce, the

174
00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:15,520
Speaker 1: date that they that they signed them divorce papers, that's

175
00:10:15,559 --> 00:10:19,720
Speaker 1: just when the court legalized it. The divorce is over.

176
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:23,480
Speaker 1: Your divorce is over long before you get a court date,

177
00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:28,040
Speaker 1: the filing and what led up to it. Divorces are

178
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:32,559
Speaker 1: long incoming. Man, so old, did I mention our divorce

179
00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:35,880
Speaker 1: is not fine? Should I let her boyfriend know who's

180
00:10:35,960 --> 00:10:39,040
Speaker 1: up and get a DNA testing? You know something? Man,

181
00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:42,760
Speaker 1: I wish you would go over there and say something

182
00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:48,480
Speaker 1: to you might get your heads. You just might get

183
00:10:48,679 --> 00:10:51,400
Speaker 1: what you need or you have to get your ass

184
00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:54,920
Speaker 1: if you bring that you have, if you go over there,

185
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,120
Speaker 1: because see guess what what you over here trying to

186
00:10:57,120 --> 00:11:01,480
Speaker 1: wreck my happiness for. Then you're over here. Now you're

187
00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:03,480
Speaker 1: gonna be all that had we had six year ago.

188
00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:06,640
Speaker 1: Then why would you do that? Why would you do that?

189
00:11:06,760 --> 00:11:08,800
Speaker 1: You know why you would do it because you miserable

190
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:13,120
Speaker 1: without her, because you did something to bring about the divorce.

191
00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:15,040
Speaker 1: Now you ain't putting none of that in your letter.

192
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,959
Speaker 1: But you don't get divorced for no reason. And she'd

193
00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:22,000
Speaker 1: have moved on this quick. Well it ain't really quick,

194
00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:25,240
Speaker 1: been two years, but she'd have moved on because you

195
00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:28,080
Speaker 1: had moved on and done something else. I promise you.

196
00:11:28,160 --> 00:11:32,560
Speaker 1: This divorce ain't about no money or nothing. I promise

197
00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:35,679
Speaker 1: you this dude did something because he didn't say nothing.

198
00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:38,080
Speaker 1: Let me tell you something. If he had some goods

199
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:40,080
Speaker 1: on this woman, the way he cried in this letter,

200
00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:43,120
Speaker 1: you don't think he has said it. She cheated on me,

201
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,360
Speaker 1: wants before this must be the dude she cheated. It

202
00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:48,200
Speaker 1: ain't none of that in that he didn't mention the

203
00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:51,160
Speaker 1: cause of the divorce. That's how I know something wrong

204
00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:53,880
Speaker 1: because a man this hurt and better would have threw

205
00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:57,800
Speaker 1: that in there. So now he gonna bring up that

206
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:03,439
Speaker 1: that that's wild night y'all had almost a year ago. Man,

207
00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:06,560
Speaker 1: Why don't you let the woman be happy and gone

208
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:10,199
Speaker 1: about your damn busy? That ain't your daughter. Chances are

209
00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:14,320
Speaker 1: you don't need a DNA. Chances are, and you want

210
00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:18,319
Speaker 1: to go over there and tell it Why he beat

211
00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:25,240
Speaker 1: your ass? Why? Why? When I hope he beat your ass?

212
00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:30,320
Speaker 1: Gotta teach you something? Whatever? Man trying to miss up

213
00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:33,079
Speaker 1: somebody happiness, man, because you're misserable with your little ragged

214
00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:37,199
Speaker 1: ass life. You got two sons, man down, And why

215
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:39,640
Speaker 1: they didn't tell him that mama was pregnant. They never

216
00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:43,400
Speaker 1: even said that. No, ain't seen them because dog dog,

217
00:12:43,520 --> 00:12:47,480
Speaker 1: let me tell you what I think. No see a man.

218
00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:50,280
Speaker 1: Let me tell you what I think. I don't think

219
00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:56,120
Speaker 1: he all that close. Because how this woman pregnant and

220
00:12:56,320 --> 00:13:00,600
Speaker 1: got his sons and the sons ain't mentioned it, and

221
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,080
Speaker 1: he ain't seen the wife. He ain't seen his girl

222
00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:08,400
Speaker 1: exact pregnant nine most pregnancy union you couldn't tell? How

223
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:15,199
Speaker 1: are you some information? How skinny? All right? Listen, Thank you? Steve.

224
00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:18,480
Speaker 1: Coming up next Junior and Sports Talk at forty six

225
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:21,800
Speaker 1: minutes after the hour. Right after this, you're listening to

226
00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:23,559
Speaker 1: the Stave Show.