WEBVTT - "I'M FINALLY OFF PROBATION"

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<v Speaker 1>Hey everybody, it's Lyle. Just a reminder that I am

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<v Speaker 1>going on tour to do therapy Gecko live in several

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<v Speaker 1>cities across the United States, and I would love to

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<v Speaker 1>see you there. I will be interviewing random folks from

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<v Speaker 1>the audience up on stage and absolutely anything could happen.

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<v Speaker 1>It will be very fun, very terrifying, and very geko wee.

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<v Speaker 1>You can find the link to get tickets in your

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<v Speaker 1>city in the episode description. Okay, let's get into the podcast. Hello. Hey,

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<v Speaker 1>what's your name?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh?

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<v Speaker 1>It says here you're anonymous.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, you can call me Snoopy.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, I like that. Why Snoopy? What is there a?

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<v Speaker 1>It's like something behind that.

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<v Speaker 3>It's my dog's name.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, So Snoopy, what's going on with you?

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<v Speaker 4>Uh?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, yeah, I've been on probation for about eight years

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<v Speaker 2>now and I'm about to get off in one week.

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<v Speaker 1>You've been on probation for eight years? You said.

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<v Speaker 3>Eight years?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, what is probation?

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<v Speaker 4>Like?

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<v Speaker 1>What are the ground rules of probation?

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<v Speaker 3>Well, I live in a.

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<v Speaker 2>Small town, so it's like, well, first of all, ground

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<v Speaker 2>rules is no doing pot, no smoking wheat at all,

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<v Speaker 2>no drinking.

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<v Speaker 3>You gotta go to a meeting.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a pain in the ass.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, So you mentioned you live in a small town.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and so like a couple of different times, people

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<v Speaker 2>have like reported me from my probation officer just for

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<v Speaker 2>like you know, going to the bar hanging with people.

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<v Speaker 3>Which is obviously breaking rules.

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<v Speaker 1>But you know, interesting around the town have reported you

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<v Speaker 1>to your probation officer for breaking the rules. Yes, why

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<v Speaker 1>do you think they do all the town? What do

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<v Speaker 1>you believe is in it for them to report you?

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<v Speaker 3>Good question, but it's happened multiple times. You know. It's

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<v Speaker 3>like people out trying to ruin lives.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe, So can I ask why you were on probation?

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, like eight years ago, I got caught selling just

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<v Speaker 5>good drugs I would say ecstasy and acid and mushrooms.

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<v Speaker 2>And so the cops bus in my house and I

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<v Speaker 2>had like ten pounds a weeed, like forty thousand dollars

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<v Speaker 2>cash and and some ecstasy and mushrooms.

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<v Speaker 3>And and then I got put on probation.

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<v Speaker 2>I went into jail for about seven months, and then

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<v Speaker 2>and then I got onto ankle water.

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<v Speaker 3>Which was a breeze everyone should do it.

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<v Speaker 2>And then and then served the time on probation. And

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<v Speaker 2>then I had another charge, well, still on probation, of

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<v Speaker 2>ordering drugs off the dark web, but this time I

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<v Speaker 2>thought that they were legal drugs.

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<v Speaker 1>You thought that you were ordering legal drugs off of

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<v Speaker 1>the dark way.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, the hand of God right now.

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<v Speaker 2>I thought that what I was ordering was legal because

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<v Speaker 2>it was like a research chemical.

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<v Speaker 1>But snoopy, If it was legal, why would they be

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<v Speaker 1>selling it on the dark web?

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<v Speaker 3>Well it was. It was on the gray web.

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<v Speaker 2>So I basically like emailed a guy from China and he.

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<v Speaker 3>Sent me something.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I paid for it was a bitcoin.

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<v Speaker 1>But yeah, and you were caught. And then how did

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<v Speaker 1>that manifest in more charges that just extend your career?

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<v Speaker 6>Exactly?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yes, another two years which I served on ankle

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<v Speaker 2>monitor and then extended out my probation even longer. But

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<v Speaker 2>in one week I am about to get off. I

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<v Speaker 2>have just intense anxiety, you know. It's more of like

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<v Speaker 2>this intending doom thing, like the whole world's about to.

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<v Speaker 3>Collapse on me.

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<v Speaker 1>So you were on the ankle monitor for two years? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>what were you? And and with the ankle monitor, were

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<v Speaker 1>you just not allowed to leave the house?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah? Exactly.

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<v Speaker 2>I had four hours a week of.

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<v Speaker 3>Free time, which I think is honestly too low.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, it's like, uh, you know a lot of

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<v Speaker 2>people go outside, and that's very curing of their addiction,

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<v Speaker 2>I would say, And I'm big into disc golfing, and

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<v Speaker 2>and I only had four hours a week to get

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<v Speaker 2>like shopping done and maybe go on a walk.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, what kinds of things would you do to

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<v Speaker 1>bide your time if you couldn't go outside?

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<v Speaker 3>Just Xbox.

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<v Speaker 2>Destiny computer games, throw the ball in.

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<v Speaker 3>The yard for my dogs.

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<v Speaker 1>Can you tell me more about this anxiety and impending

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<v Speaker 1>doom that you're feeling as a result of your approbation

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<v Speaker 1>being over. I would, I would. I would think that

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<v Speaker 1>that would be a positive thing that you're looking forward to.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm curious, why are you feeling it?

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<v Speaker 7>Is?

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<v Speaker 2>I just maybe that's the anxiety causing it, Is that

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just thinking that something bad is going to happen,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, even though I'm not doing anything wrong that

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I guess it's just a big thing after

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<v Speaker 2>not being able to do anything after so long and

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<v Speaker 2>then suddenly you know, you don't have probation officers that

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<v Speaker 2>can suddenly stop at your house or I can go

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<v Speaker 2>out to the bar and get a drink. I can

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<v Speaker 2>go to the dispensary and buy weed. You know, it's

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<v Speaker 2>just a big difference in my life.

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<v Speaker 1>So where is the anxiety coming from? What you said?

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<v Speaker 1>You said that you're afraid of what bad things could happen.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you have any examples of specific bad things that

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<v Speaker 1>you're afraid might happen.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, actually it's uh, my wife she smokes weed and

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<v Speaker 2>she drinks, and so I'm in this kind of predicament

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<v Speaker 2>where if they were to stop buy right now, I

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<v Speaker 2>like I would get in.

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<v Speaker 3>Trouble just by proxy. I believe.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, there's alcohol in the house, there's weed in

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<v Speaker 2>the house. I'm not doing it, but he is. But

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<v Speaker 2>then here I will be doing it, you know. So

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<v Speaker 2>it's like I'm in this tough position where it's like

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<v Speaker 2>I can't really.

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<v Speaker 1>So wait a minute, So so is your So I

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<v Speaker 1>mean what you just described is an anxiety over potentially

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<v Speaker 1>being caught while still on probation. Is that what you're

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<v Speaker 1>Are you anxious in this time period right now? Or

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<v Speaker 1>I'm trying to proverb about, like you know, what is

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<v Speaker 1>it that you're anxious about that you think might happen

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<v Speaker 1>that could go wrong once you are free from probation.

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<v Speaker 2>More it's just the fear of unknown, i'd say. I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>since I've been on probation and I've gotten married, We've

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<v Speaker 2>gotten multiple animals together, you know, life is good. But

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<v Speaker 2>it's just kind of, yeah, just something.

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<v Speaker 1>I haven't experienced for a very long time, you.

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<v Speaker 8>Know, so.

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<v Speaker 3>Twenty one, you know, and I'm almost thirty.

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<v Speaker 1>So is it more so, let me take a stab

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<v Speaker 1>at it. Is it? Just like you have your life

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<v Speaker 1>is pretty small and you know, literally being lived within

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<v Speaker 1>this finite circle for the past eight years, and it's comfortable.

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<v Speaker 1>You're used to it. It sounds like it's you know,

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<v Speaker 1>been nice. You have your wife, you have your animals,

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<v Speaker 1>you have your house. Things seem like they've been okay

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<v Speaker 1>for you from what I've you know, gathered from the

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<v Speaker 1>way you're talking about it. And now all of a sudden,

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<v Speaker 1>that comfortable circle is opening up to a wide, expansive

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<v Speaker 1>see of the infinite, and the size of that infinite

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<v Speaker 1>is giving you anxiety. Yes, definitely, Okay. Is there anything

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<v Speaker 1>over these past eight years that you have really wanted

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<v Speaker 1>to do that you could not do because of your

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<v Speaker 1>probation that you are now to do.

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<v Speaker 3>There was a vacation, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>I couldn't leave town for a very long time, but

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<v Speaker 2>I just did that. I just got married and went

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<v Speaker 2>on my honeymoon.

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<v Speaker 4>And.

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<v Speaker 3>That was a possibility.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I couldn't smoke, I couldn't drink on my.

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<v Speaker 3>Honeymoon, you know, so that was fun.

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<v Speaker 6>But still it was a vacation, you know, man, I

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<v Speaker 6>think it.

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<v Speaker 1>I think it. First. I was struggling to understand where

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<v Speaker 1>you were coming from, but I actually kind of get

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<v Speaker 1>it now. I'm thinking back to the pandemic, where all

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<v Speaker 1>the opportunity costs of the world disappeared, and for once,

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<v Speaker 1>things of you know, for some people. Everyone kind of

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<v Speaker 1>handled it differently and has different philosophies on how they

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<v Speaker 1>want to live life. But for once, the smaller your

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<v Speaker 1>world is, the more manageable it is. And there's something

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<v Speaker 1>nice to that. And I remember feeling like all of

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<v Speaker 1>the anxieties of oh I could do anything of that big,

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<v Speaker 1>unknowable ocean of the universe for the first time ever

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<v Speaker 1>disappeared not just for me but for everyone, and there

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<v Speaker 1>was a weirdly comfortable thing to it that I'm kind

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<v Speaker 1>of keying into. With your situation, and well, let me

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<v Speaker 1>ask you, Well, let me ask you this. You're saying change?

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<v Speaker 1>Why why if you have everything you need at home,

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<v Speaker 1>why does there even need to be any change?

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<v Speaker 3>Well?

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<v Speaker 2>I do like smoking weed.

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<v Speaker 4>You know, Okay, who.

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<v Speaker 2>Doesn't say, Well, a lot of people, but you know.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I mean okay, Well, so I mean listen, if

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<v Speaker 1>you want to smoke weed and you know you're you

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<v Speaker 1>know that it's not going to fuck you up in

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<v Speaker 1>any kind of negative way, then go smoke weed. But

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<v Speaker 1>I mean we're talking about your anxiety over your world

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<v Speaker 1>opening up? Yeah, are you anxious about is it? Let

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<v Speaker 1>me ask you, is there any part of you that's

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<v Speaker 1>anxious about any negative? So you haven't smoked weed in

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<v Speaker 1>eight years? Is that correct?

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<v Speaker 3>Well, through a loophole in.

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<v Speaker 2>My probation, I tried to get a medical card, and

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<v Speaker 2>so this last Christmas I was allowed to smoke for

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<v Speaker 2>one week and then and then they canceled it and

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<v Speaker 2>said it wasn't a good enough reason, and so I

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<v Speaker 2>had one week of smoking weed.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, I'm going to assume that over these past eight

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<v Speaker 1>years you have had little pockets of pieces where you have,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, however legally or not smoked weed. Or gotten drunk.

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<v Speaker 1>But in the past eight years it more or less

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<v Speaker 1>has not been you know, I guess legal by your terms. Yeah, right,

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<v Speaker 1>So a constant thing. And so is there is any

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<v Speaker 1>part of you wanted to do Is any part of

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<v Speaker 1>you anxious about any negative effects that reintroducing a consistent

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<v Speaker 1>stream of weed, smoking and alcohol drinking back into your

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<v Speaker 1>life might have.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I would hope I wouldn't have a constant shame

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<v Speaker 2>of alcohol.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't. I don't think alcohol is the best for you,

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<v Speaker 3>okay or me? Yeah, But.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean.

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<v Speaker 3>I would say it's just anxiety in general.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, it's like, what what if I go back

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<v Speaker 2>to jail? What if I get back on probation for

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<v Speaker 2>some something stupid?

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<v Speaker 3>You know?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, do you have any plans or let's not even

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<v Speaker 1>talk about plans, but desires, thoughts, intrusive thoughts, temptations to

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<v Speaker 1>do anything that might land you back in the situation

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<v Speaker 1>like that. No, I'm glad to hear that. I'm glad

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<v Speaker 1>to hear that.

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<v Speaker 2>Intrusive thoughts maybe maybe in true.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh we all got those.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, but I.

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<v Speaker 2>Think I think that after eight years kind of you know,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sick of being under the government's thump.

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<v Speaker 1>Mm hmmm mm hmm.

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<v Speaker 2>But I feel I feel my best interest.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel where your anxiety is coming from. And I

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<v Speaker 1>also feel like you'll you'll adjust to your freedom after

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit of time, and it won't be as

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<v Speaker 1>scary for you. Uh once once sometimes pasted.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, definitely, well, it says he you definitely made me

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<v Speaker 2>feel a little better better.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, good good. I'm glad to hear that. I'm glad

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<v Speaker 1>that this uh was something.

0:14:57.880 --> 0:14:58.280
<v Speaker 3>Something.

0:15:00.040 --> 0:15:01.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm glad to hear that you also were able to

0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:06.800
<v Speaker 1>build a b A A a A a good life for

0:15:06.840 --> 0:15:10.520
<v Speaker 1>yourself while on probation. Yeah, it sounds like you've got

0:15:10.560 --> 0:15:11.200
<v Speaker 1>a good thing going.

0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:20.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's definitely taught me to to not fuck up,

0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:25.080
<v Speaker 2>i'd say, and not have to deal with the police.

0:15:25.200 --> 0:15:30.280
<v Speaker 1>But yeah, you were about to say that I should

0:15:30.320 --> 0:15:30.800
<v Speaker 1>do something.

0:15:32.680 --> 0:15:35.520
<v Speaker 3>You should come to Alaska on your tour.

0:15:36.320 --> 0:15:39.880
<v Speaker 1>Okay, So I saw here it says Anonymous twenty nine

0:15:40.000 --> 0:15:44.160
<v Speaker 1>is from Alaska. I saw that you're from Alaska. I

0:15:44.160 --> 0:15:46.840
<v Speaker 1>don't want to dox you, but I really I really

0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:51.680
<v Speaker 1>want to go to Anchorage find some I don't know

0:15:51.720 --> 0:15:54.240
<v Speaker 1>how many people that listen to this are in the

0:15:54.280 --> 0:15:55.360
<v Speaker 1>fucking Alaska.

0:15:55.400 --> 0:15:57.960
<v Speaker 3>Well I'm not from Anchorage. You shouldn't do that.

0:15:58.480 --> 0:16:01.600
<v Speaker 1>I shouldn't do Anchorage. I feel like if I'm going anywhere,

0:16:01.600 --> 0:16:03.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna go to Anchorage. And you know what, with

0:16:03.960 --> 0:16:06.680
<v Speaker 1>your new found anywhere, where.

0:16:06.560 --> 0:16:06.800
<v Speaker 5>Do you think?

0:16:06.840 --> 0:16:07.720
<v Speaker 1>Where do you think I should go?

0:16:07.760 --> 0:16:13.640
<v Speaker 2>That's the most popular city. Yeah, there's a couple of

0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:14.400
<v Speaker 2>different cities.

0:16:15.600 --> 0:16:17.480
<v Speaker 1>Well here I'll go to I'll go to Anchorage, and

0:16:17.480 --> 0:16:21.840
<v Speaker 1>then you, with your new found freedom should come I

0:16:21.880 --> 0:16:22.360
<v Speaker 1>we'll talk.

0:16:22.520 --> 0:16:28.680
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, or I just for a bit and find

0:16:28.680 --> 0:16:29.200
<v Speaker 2>a live.

0:16:29.040 --> 0:16:33.080
<v Speaker 1>Show you're doing, Snooper or anything else you want to

0:16:33.080 --> 0:16:34.560
<v Speaker 1>say to the people of the computer before you go.

0:16:38.520 --> 0:16:41.200
<v Speaker 1>I love you, I love you too.

0:16:43.560 --> 0:16:44.960
<v Speaker 3>Have a good one.

0:16:46.200 --> 0:16:49.560
<v Speaker 1>I like that guy. He had an interesting dilemma. He

0:16:49.600 --> 0:16:52.480
<v Speaker 1>had an interesting dilemma that I like. I said to him.

0:16:52.520 --> 0:16:54.440
<v Speaker 1>I didn't understand it first, and then I kind of

0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:57.840
<v Speaker 1>got it because I was relating it to my own

0:16:57.880 --> 0:17:04.679
<v Speaker 1>experience with the pandemic. And there's a weird I guess,

0:17:05.760 --> 0:17:12.000
<v Speaker 1>paralysis of choice, where if you are are limited to

0:17:12.880 --> 0:17:18.520
<v Speaker 1>a certain area that you can exist in certain finite

0:17:19.160 --> 0:17:25.040
<v Speaker 1>actions you can take. There's a almost a comfort in

0:17:25.080 --> 0:17:32.119
<v Speaker 1>it that I think Snoopy was reeling in for the

0:17:32.119 --> 0:17:38.199
<v Speaker 1>past eight years. And it's really bizarre because, yes, the

0:17:38.240 --> 0:17:40.439
<v Speaker 1>world is opening back up for him now his privation

0:17:40.640 --> 0:17:43.760
<v Speaker 1>is open. But just because the world has opened up,

0:17:44.440 --> 0:17:47.720
<v Speaker 1>he doesn't have to do anything he could if he

0:17:47.800 --> 0:17:51.520
<v Speaker 1>wanted to continue to enjoy his comfort live exactly the

0:17:51.600 --> 0:17:55.840
<v Speaker 1>same way he's been living for the past eight years.

0:17:56.400 --> 0:18:00.960
<v Speaker 1>There is no law saying that he has to travel

0:18:01.000 --> 0:18:06.800
<v Speaker 1>anywhere or do anything outside of his bubble. But it's

0:18:07.000 --> 0:18:15.440
<v Speaker 1>it's fascinating to me, just from like some objective standpoint

0:18:16.280 --> 0:18:19.720
<v Speaker 1>that just the knowledge that the world is opening up,

0:18:20.040 --> 0:18:22.480
<v Speaker 1>even though he's not being forced to leave his comfort zone,

0:18:22.600 --> 0:18:28.679
<v Speaker 1>just the fact that the option exists is giving him anxiety.

0:18:28.800 --> 0:18:31.359
<v Speaker 1>I find that interesting. I've kind of, like I said,

0:18:31.359 --> 0:18:34.879
<v Speaker 1>I connected with that a lot with the pandemic. You know,

0:18:35.960 --> 0:18:40.560
<v Speaker 1>the idea that you can do anything is both beautiful

0:18:41.000 --> 0:18:45.520
<v Speaker 1>and weirdly paralyzing. Hello, how's it going.

0:18:47.640 --> 0:18:48.959
<v Speaker 8>Pretty good? How are you?

0:18:50.240 --> 0:18:53.800
<v Speaker 1>I am? Okay, I'm a gecko on the computer. Crazy

0:18:53.840 --> 0:18:56.120
<v Speaker 1>times we're living in where you can just do that.

0:18:58.119 --> 0:19:01.000
<v Speaker 1>Very What are you? What are you up to? What's

0:19:01.040 --> 0:19:02.240
<v Speaker 1>going on in your.

0:19:02.080 --> 0:19:10.280
<v Speaker 8>Life right now? I'm just sitting in bed with my cat.

0:19:10.720 --> 0:19:13.760
<v Speaker 1>But I don't know.

0:19:14.440 --> 0:19:15.800
<v Speaker 8>I didn't think I was gonna get on here.

0:19:15.800 --> 0:19:17.080
<v Speaker 7>I'm kind of nervous.

0:19:17.440 --> 0:19:20.200
<v Speaker 1>No, don't be look I and everyone. I was saying

0:19:20.200 --> 0:19:25.360
<v Speaker 1>this a lot during the live shows. Everyone is kind

0:19:25.359 --> 0:19:27.920
<v Speaker 1>of gets nervous when they first get on, and then

0:19:27.960 --> 0:19:30.359
<v Speaker 1>after like two minutes you'll be like, oh, I'm just

0:19:30.480 --> 0:19:34.720
<v Speaker 1>on the phone with a person hanging out, So don't

0:19:34.720 --> 0:19:39.640
<v Speaker 1>worry about that'll that'll go away eventually. But what's honest,

0:19:39.640 --> 0:19:42.520
<v Speaker 1>is there anything in particularly called in to talk about.

0:19:46.080 --> 0:19:48.720
<v Speaker 8>I was trying to think about something, you know, when

0:19:48.720 --> 0:19:53.080
<v Speaker 8>I was calling. There's like one thing that stood out.

0:19:53.200 --> 0:19:55.880
<v Speaker 8>I know you can like see what it is, but

0:19:56.160 --> 0:20:00.879
<v Speaker 8>it's given me a lot of anxiety, and I haven't

0:20:00.880 --> 0:20:02.199
<v Speaker 8>really talked to anyone about it.

0:20:02.240 --> 0:20:07.639
<v Speaker 1>So, uh, do you do you want to talk about it?

0:20:09.040 --> 0:20:09.280
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

0:20:09.320 --> 0:20:15.440
<v Speaker 1>That's fine, Okay, I mean listen, you know, you only

0:20:15.480 --> 0:20:16.479
<v Speaker 1>if you want to talk about it.

0:20:18.040 --> 0:20:21.080
<v Speaker 8>Yeah, I mean I don't. I don't. I think that's fine.

0:20:21.080 --> 0:20:23.960
<v Speaker 8>I don't think no one's listening anyway, no one that

0:20:24.040 --> 0:20:26.480
<v Speaker 8>I know, And even if they are, I mean, it'll

0:20:26.480 --> 0:20:31.919
<v Speaker 8>come out eventually. So yeah, I'll just say I'm pregnant,

0:20:32.080 --> 0:20:35.040
<v Speaker 8>not that any of you guys care but like, you know,

0:20:35.240 --> 0:20:39.200
<v Speaker 8>obviously that's something crazy in my life.

0:20:40.119 --> 0:20:43.840
<v Speaker 1>So do people in your life not know that you

0:20:43.840 --> 0:20:44.440
<v Speaker 1>are pregnant?

0:20:47.000 --> 0:20:52.399
<v Speaker 8>Only only the dad and it's really early?

0:20:52.600 --> 0:20:58.639
<v Speaker 1>So mm hmm, are is there a Is there a

0:20:58.720 --> 0:21:00.919
<v Speaker 1>reason why? And by the way, know that you're you know,

0:21:01.840 --> 0:21:04.159
<v Speaker 1>I haven't talked about this with anyone. So look, if

0:21:04.160 --> 0:21:06.800
<v Speaker 1>I ask you any questions about anything that you you know,

0:21:06.880 --> 0:21:09.560
<v Speaker 1>don't want to answer, don't don't uh feel like you

0:21:09.640 --> 0:21:13.520
<v Speaker 1>have to. Is there is there a reason why you

0:21:13.520 --> 0:21:14.360
<v Speaker 1>haven't told anyone?

0:21:19.480 --> 0:21:22.480
<v Speaker 8>I guess I'm I'm kind of nervous. I mean, I'm

0:21:22.520 --> 0:21:26.520
<v Speaker 8>twenty five. It's not like I'm like a kid. But

0:21:30.880 --> 0:21:34.359
<v Speaker 8>I guess, well, the relationship is kind of new and

0:21:34.800 --> 0:21:39.479
<v Speaker 8>everything's great, and like I know, this is something I've wanted,

0:21:39.840 --> 0:21:42.159
<v Speaker 8>you know, I've always wanted to be a mom, But

0:21:42.359 --> 0:21:45.720
<v Speaker 8>like when it happens, it's kind of it kind of

0:21:45.800 --> 0:21:46.800
<v Speaker 8>hits a lot different.

0:21:48.160 --> 0:21:50.000
<v Speaker 1>In what way is it hitting you different?

0:21:56.000 --> 0:22:02.240
<v Speaker 8>I guess just like not knowing. If I guess everyone

0:22:02.440 --> 0:22:04.800
<v Speaker 8>if they're in that situation that doesn't know if they're

0:22:04.800 --> 0:22:10.800
<v Speaker 8>gonna be able to handle it or not. Mm hmmm, Uh,

0:22:11.760 --> 0:22:13.720
<v Speaker 8>I don't know. I guess just like if I'm making

0:22:13.760 --> 0:22:14.639
<v Speaker 8>the right decisions.

0:22:15.359 --> 0:22:19.920
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmmmm, is it is it? Is it a decision

0:22:20.040 --> 0:22:27.879
<v Speaker 1>that you have thought a lot about? Yeah, okay, can

0:22:27.880 --> 0:22:30.480
<v Speaker 1>I hear about kind of the thought processes and you know,

0:22:30.600 --> 0:22:34.200
<v Speaker 1>the what the bouncing of thoughts back and forth has been.

0:22:39.119 --> 0:22:42.679
<v Speaker 8>Well, it's like I don't have like a you know,

0:22:43.119 --> 0:22:49.399
<v Speaker 8>great career or something something like that. Like I'm in

0:22:49.400 --> 0:22:52.520
<v Speaker 8>a relationship with the father and he's he's a lot

0:22:52.560 --> 0:22:57.520
<v Speaker 8>more you know, stable, and like I guess, you know,

0:22:57.560 --> 0:23:03.119
<v Speaker 8>we wouldn't I wouldn't have to worry about like things

0:23:03.160 --> 0:23:05.400
<v Speaker 8>being handled or taken care of. You know, we could,

0:23:05.480 --> 0:23:10.119
<v Speaker 8>we would be able to handle it. But like like

0:23:10.160 --> 0:23:13.280
<v Speaker 8>I said, since it's a newish relationship, I just kind

0:23:13.280 --> 0:23:18.919
<v Speaker 8>of want to obviously make sure that like if and

0:23:19.040 --> 0:23:21.280
<v Speaker 8>you never know if a relationship is going to work out,

0:23:21.280 --> 0:23:27.679
<v Speaker 8>whether you're like married or whatever. But I guess, just

0:23:27.720 --> 0:23:30.600
<v Speaker 8>like thinking in my head if I can, if I'd

0:23:30.640 --> 0:23:32.840
<v Speaker 8>be willing to do that alone if it ever came

0:23:32.920 --> 0:23:35.159
<v Speaker 8>to that, you know, not that I don't think I have.

0:23:35.280 --> 0:23:37.040
<v Speaker 8>I don't have any reason to think about that.

0:23:37.240 --> 0:23:40.840
<v Speaker 1>But how long have you been in a relationship with

0:23:40.840 --> 0:23:41.400
<v Speaker 1>with the father?

0:23:44.600 --> 0:23:45.440
<v Speaker 8>Less than a year?

0:23:46.280 --> 0:23:51.600
<v Speaker 1>Okay? Okay, And is is he excited about the pregnancy

0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:52.000
<v Speaker 1>as well?

0:23:54.320 --> 0:24:00.920
<v Speaker 8>Yeah, like he's been. He's been really supportive and hasn't

0:24:01.040 --> 0:24:04.560
<v Speaker 8>you know, every time we've talked about it or I

0:24:04.600 --> 0:24:09.280
<v Speaker 8>guess I've asked what he thinks. He hasn't hasn't suggested

0:24:09.720 --> 0:24:12.720
<v Speaker 8>that I get an abortion, or you know, is supportive

0:24:13.400 --> 0:24:16.320
<v Speaker 8>like say like let's do it or whatever. But it's

0:24:16.440 --> 0:24:17.800
<v Speaker 8>just scary, I guess.

0:24:19.200 --> 0:24:21.479
<v Speaker 1>And you said to me that this is something that

0:24:21.520 --> 0:24:29.359
<v Speaker 1>you have always known that you wanted to do. Yeah, okay, okay,

0:24:32.320 --> 0:24:35.320
<v Speaker 1>you know I feel like the feelings that you have

0:24:35.960 --> 0:24:39.040
<v Speaker 1>where you know, first of all, I'm glad to hear

0:24:39.080 --> 0:24:42.000
<v Speaker 1>that there's something you want, you know, it's not something

0:24:42.000 --> 0:24:44.520
<v Speaker 1>that you're feeling like you're being pressured into. It's it's not,

0:24:45.680 --> 0:24:50.240
<v Speaker 1>you know, something where you know. I'm glad to hear

0:24:50.320 --> 0:24:53.520
<v Speaker 1>that the father is also has you know, is on

0:24:53.600 --> 0:24:56.960
<v Speaker 1>the same page as you are with everything. Those are

0:24:57.600 --> 0:25:01.119
<v Speaker 1>those are are great things to not have be hurdles

0:25:01.880 --> 0:25:07.679
<v Speaker 1>in all of this. And you know, I mean, you

0:25:07.800 --> 0:25:09.760
<v Speaker 1>know what you want, you made the decision to go

0:25:09.840 --> 0:25:12.320
<v Speaker 1>for it, and then you're dealing with these feelings of

0:25:13.240 --> 0:25:15.639
<v Speaker 1>am I gonna be able to handle it, and I

0:25:15.800 --> 0:25:20.200
<v Speaker 1>get the feeling. I'm not a mom, I don't have kids,

0:25:20.760 --> 0:25:24.680
<v Speaker 1>but my mom has kids. And I get the feeling

0:25:25.280 --> 0:25:27.439
<v Speaker 1>that your feelings of not knowing whether or not to

0:25:27.440 --> 0:25:31.879
<v Speaker 1>handle it are about as normal as they could possibly

0:25:31.920 --> 0:25:36.480
<v Speaker 1>be in this situation. It has to be something that

0:25:36.520 --> 0:25:39.399
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure everybody who is about to have a kid

0:25:40.000 --> 0:25:46.680
<v Speaker 1>feels and eventually deals with and overcomes. And I think

0:25:46.720 --> 0:25:50.520
<v Speaker 1>that you sound like, again, you're going into this for

0:25:51.440 --> 0:25:56.200
<v Speaker 1>the right reason, which is that you want to. And

0:25:56.320 --> 0:25:59.800
<v Speaker 1>I think that even though it'll be challenging, I think

0:25:59.800 --> 0:26:01.359
<v Speaker 1>that will overcome those challenges.

0:26:04.000 --> 0:26:11.399
<v Speaker 8>Yeah, thank you. I guess it's kind of also just

0:26:11.560 --> 0:26:18.080
<v Speaker 8>feeling like I haven't done enough, you know, like like

0:26:18.160 --> 0:26:22.560
<v Speaker 8>thinking you would have done more by that point, like

0:26:23.840 --> 0:26:25.720
<v Speaker 8>bringing a kid into the world. You know, I want

0:26:25.760 --> 0:26:29.840
<v Speaker 8>to have like things to show and like be proud of.

0:26:29.880 --> 0:26:31.520
<v Speaker 1>Kind of can I can?

0:26:31.520 --> 0:26:33.399
<v Speaker 8>I ask what time I'm getting emotional?

0:26:34.119 --> 0:26:37.760
<v Speaker 1>No, it's okay, it's okay. And by the way, you know,

0:26:37.840 --> 0:26:40.280
<v Speaker 1>like I keep telling you, you know, I only want

0:26:40.320 --> 0:26:42.840
<v Speaker 1>you to have this conversation if you feel like you

0:26:42.880 --> 0:26:44.880
<v Speaker 1>know you want to and everything. I know it's something

0:26:44.880 --> 0:26:46.159
<v Speaker 1>you haven't talked about before.

0:26:46.960 --> 0:26:49.119
<v Speaker 8>Yeah, I guess that's why because I haven't talked to

0:26:49.119 --> 0:26:49.960
<v Speaker 8>anyone about it.

0:26:50.520 --> 0:26:53.560
<v Speaker 1>So can I ask you this? You said that there

0:26:53.560 --> 0:26:55.920
<v Speaker 1>are things that you felt like you wanted to do

0:26:56.200 --> 0:26:58.919
<v Speaker 1>or have to show forth. What can I hear some

0:26:58.960 --> 0:27:00.000
<v Speaker 1>of those things an example?

0:27:03.440 --> 0:27:05.720
<v Speaker 8>I really don't know. That's why it sucks, Like I

0:27:05.720 --> 0:27:09.159
<v Speaker 8>guess that's the only reason I'm doubting things is because

0:27:09.280 --> 0:27:13.440
<v Speaker 8>I don't have like get anything figured out yet.

0:27:13.480 --> 0:27:19.600
<v Speaker 1>You know, m hm, Well, I mean, if to me,

0:27:20.960 --> 0:27:27.320
<v Speaker 1>if you don't have clear examples of, Oh, I want

0:27:27.359 --> 0:27:29.520
<v Speaker 1>to accomplish X thing, but I don't think I can

0:27:29.560 --> 0:27:31.960
<v Speaker 1>do it if I have a baby, then if we

0:27:32.040 --> 0:27:36.520
<v Speaker 1>don't even know what X thing is, then how can

0:27:36.520 --> 0:27:40.520
<v Speaker 1>we jump to the conclusion that you can't do it

0:27:40.840 --> 0:27:42.320
<v Speaker 1>while also having a kid?

0:27:43.800 --> 0:27:47.359
<v Speaker 7>Yeah?

0:27:47.440 --> 0:27:48.800
<v Speaker 1>So I mean, I you know, I mean, if I

0:27:48.840 --> 0:27:50.680
<v Speaker 1>gave you a second to think about it, are there

0:27:51.359 --> 0:27:54.000
<v Speaker 1>are there things that that you really can think of

0:27:54.040 --> 0:27:55.800
<v Speaker 1>that you want to do that you're afraid you might

0:27:55.840 --> 0:27:58.920
<v Speaker 1>not be able to do? And maybe if we talk

0:27:58.960 --> 0:28:01.560
<v Speaker 1>about it a little bit, we can realize that maybe

0:28:02.000 --> 0:28:07.120
<v Speaker 1>maybe we really can do those things.

0:28:09.080 --> 0:28:12.840
<v Speaker 8>I I don't know, I haven't I still haven't been

0:28:12.880 --> 0:28:17.720
<v Speaker 8>able to find some uh, I guess career path or

0:28:17.720 --> 0:28:20.119
<v Speaker 8>like figure out exactly what I want to do. I

0:28:20.160 --> 0:28:24.400
<v Speaker 8>know I want to help people. I'm not great at

0:28:24.400 --> 0:28:27.960
<v Speaker 8>the like uh, I mean, I can do a nine

0:28:28.000 --> 0:28:31.200
<v Speaker 8>to five, you know, anyone can. But it's not it's

0:28:31.240 --> 0:28:38.000
<v Speaker 8>not like what I'm drawn too. I really, I really

0:28:38.080 --> 0:28:40.160
<v Speaker 8>it's I feel like it sounds so stupid, but I

0:28:40.200 --> 0:28:43.080
<v Speaker 8>always wanted to be a mom, so like that's kind of.

0:28:45.000 --> 0:28:45.480
<v Speaker 4>Mm hmmm.

0:28:45.800 --> 0:28:50.920
<v Speaker 8>I feel like everything else was like as as long

0:28:50.960 --> 0:28:53.880
<v Speaker 8>as I was able to like provide or like give

0:28:53.920 --> 0:28:59.120
<v Speaker 8>a good life, like that's what I wanted. But I

0:28:59.160 --> 0:29:03.880
<v Speaker 8>don't know. No, I don't know any I don't know

0:29:03.920 --> 0:29:08.960
<v Speaker 8>any like concrete things that I would like to accomplish.

0:29:09.000 --> 0:29:16.200
<v Speaker 1>Really, if what you're saying is is true, it sounds

0:29:16.200 --> 0:29:23.440
<v Speaker 1>like you're doing the thing that you want to do. Yeah,

0:29:24.040 --> 0:29:28.680
<v Speaker 1>you know, I understand why there's a lot of fear

0:29:28.760 --> 0:29:32.680
<v Speaker 1>that having a kid can be limiting. But also, I mean,

0:29:32.680 --> 0:29:36.880
<v Speaker 1>you're very young, and I feel like anything that you

0:29:36.920 --> 0:29:41.040
<v Speaker 1>would want to do, there's a lot of time for

0:29:41.120 --> 0:29:43.720
<v Speaker 1>you to do it, and you're doing a thing that

0:29:43.760 --> 0:29:46.680
<v Speaker 1>you've always wanted to do. So you know, you're sitting

0:29:46.720 --> 0:29:50.440
<v Speaker 1>here and you can't think of anything concrete aside from

0:29:50.480 --> 0:29:53.560
<v Speaker 1>being a mom that you want to do and you're

0:29:53.560 --> 0:29:55.040
<v Speaker 1>doing the thing that you want to do, and I,

0:29:55.120 --> 0:30:00.000
<v Speaker 1>you know, I think that's that's great. And I think

0:30:00.000 --> 0:30:02.000
<v Speaker 1>there's lots of people out there who have kids that

0:30:04.240 --> 0:30:08.920
<v Speaker 1>later in life, maybe five years from now, when you're

0:30:08.960 --> 0:30:11.640
<v Speaker 1>thirty and the kid is five, you are like, oh,

0:30:11.680 --> 0:30:16.120
<v Speaker 1>I want to fucking paint stuff, and you find a

0:30:16.160 --> 0:30:19.640
<v Speaker 1>way to finagle that into your life or any other

0:30:19.920 --> 0:30:23.080
<v Speaker 1>things that you would want to do, you know. I

0:30:23.280 --> 0:30:32.600
<v Speaker 1>I I feel like this idea of limitations that you're

0:30:33.680 --> 0:30:39.360
<v Speaker 1>setting doesn't have a concrete basis, and so I wouldn't

0:30:39.400 --> 0:30:40.720
<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't be so afraid of it.

0:30:44.560 --> 0:30:46.080
<v Speaker 7>Okay, I get that.

0:30:47.520 --> 0:30:49.200
<v Speaker 1>I mean you could tell you could tell me if

0:30:49.240 --> 0:30:50.920
<v Speaker 1>you if you don't agree, or if you think otherwise,

0:30:51.000 --> 0:30:53.400
<v Speaker 1>or if you have any other no of this, you know.

0:30:56.240 --> 0:31:03.440
<v Speaker 8>I guess I just feel like, you know, obviously, it

0:31:03.520 --> 0:31:09.440
<v Speaker 8>depends on like how the future goes with like you know,

0:31:09.920 --> 0:31:14.880
<v Speaker 8>my relationship or the structure of it, or however we

0:31:15.040 --> 0:31:23.640
<v Speaker 8>work that out. But like, hm, I don't, I don't know.

0:31:23.680 --> 0:31:26.240
<v Speaker 8>I guess people, I guess I'm worried about people judging

0:31:26.320 --> 0:31:32.720
<v Speaker 8>too for like people kind of judge or like, my

0:31:32.880 --> 0:31:36.960
<v Speaker 8>family will support me and everything, but it's also like

0:31:37.560 --> 0:31:40.720
<v Speaker 8>I think they'll think that stuff too. M h.

0:31:44.320 --> 0:31:44.360
<v Speaker 4>H.

0:31:47.320 --> 0:31:57.880
<v Speaker 1>I I hope that you understand, at least from where

0:31:57.920 --> 0:32:00.840
<v Speaker 1>you know, from where I from where I see it,

0:32:02.560 --> 0:32:09.400
<v Speaker 1>from what you've told me, you're making a decision in

0:32:09.520 --> 0:32:16.120
<v Speaker 1>the direction of what you want out of life. Yeah,

0:32:16.160 --> 0:32:23.640
<v Speaker 1>And I hope that you understand that, and I hope

0:32:23.680 --> 0:32:27.880
<v Speaker 1>that you feel confident in that, and I hope that

0:32:28.040 --> 0:32:35.560
<v Speaker 1>your confidence in that supersedes any of your friends or

0:32:35.640 --> 0:32:41.440
<v Speaker 1>family's judgments on your decisions, because I really feel like

0:32:41.480 --> 0:32:42.280
<v Speaker 1>it should.

0:32:46.560 --> 0:32:47.160
<v Speaker 7>Thank you are.

0:32:52.920 --> 0:32:55.640
<v Speaker 8>How do you know, you know, but here you are.

0:32:59.400 --> 0:33:03.600
<v Speaker 8>I feel good. I just I I've felt excited, you

0:33:03.640 --> 0:33:04.800
<v Speaker 8>know the whole time.

0:33:04.880 --> 0:33:05.320
<v Speaker 4>I just.

0:33:07.760 --> 0:33:11.120
<v Speaker 8>Been on the fence, like you know, should I have time,

0:33:11.280 --> 0:33:13.680
<v Speaker 8>like I have time to make a decision, you know,

0:33:13.880 --> 0:33:18.800
<v Speaker 8>or like to think about my options. So I guess

0:33:18.920 --> 0:33:22.720
<v Speaker 8>I was just kind of doing that. But I I know,

0:33:23.040 --> 0:33:25.560
<v Speaker 8>like what you're saying, it is right if that's kind

0:33:25.600 --> 0:33:29.200
<v Speaker 8>of what I have wanted, and you know I'm able.

0:33:28.960 --> 0:33:41.200
<v Speaker 7>To to do that in the right situation. M Oh yeah,

0:33:41.560 --> 0:33:42.440
<v Speaker 7>that's basically it.

0:33:45.680 --> 0:33:50.840
<v Speaker 1>Brianna. Is there anything else that you you want to say,

0:33:51.160 --> 0:33:55.400
<v Speaker 1>or any aspect of this that that you feel like

0:33:55.480 --> 0:33:58.480
<v Speaker 1>we didn't cover that you want to talk about before

0:33:58.560 --> 0:33:58.880
<v Speaker 1>we go.

0:34:03.520 --> 0:34:10.440
<v Speaker 8>No. I also, okay, somebody's probably I have a question.

0:34:10.600 --> 0:34:13.280
<v Speaker 8>Somebody's probably asked this before.

0:34:12.960 --> 0:34:13.880
<v Speaker 4>Sure, stupid.

0:34:17.080 --> 0:34:20.080
<v Speaker 8>How how often do you wash the GAT suit?

0:34:22.640 --> 0:34:26.520
<v Speaker 1>I have probably bought more. This is embarrassing to say,

0:34:26.520 --> 0:34:28.640
<v Speaker 1>but I have bought more GaX suits than I have

0:34:28.920 --> 0:34:34.799
<v Speaker 1>washed GAK suits. That is a testament to my laziness.

0:34:36.760 --> 0:34:40.520
<v Speaker 8>So do you have like different ones? You just toss

0:34:40.600 --> 0:34:42.360
<v Speaker 8>them out when you're done.

0:34:43.080 --> 0:34:47.040
<v Speaker 1>Some of the they get like tattered and destroyed and lost.

0:34:47.200 --> 0:34:52.480
<v Speaker 8>Yeah, that one, that one. Everyone was worried about your

0:34:52.560 --> 0:34:54.680
<v Speaker 8>jewels coming out on that one.

0:34:55.040 --> 0:34:58.440
<v Speaker 1>Keep your like, oh yeah there's a big Yeah, there's

0:34:58.480 --> 0:35:00.520
<v Speaker 1>a big fucking hole in my pants right now. So

0:35:01.080 --> 0:35:04.400
<v Speaker 1>this one will probably be thrown together to the to

0:35:04.480 --> 0:35:11.759
<v Speaker 1>the to the to the wolves. You know, I don't

0:35:11.760 --> 0:35:13.840
<v Speaker 1>think I don't I don't think I could sell this

0:35:13.960 --> 0:35:17.680
<v Speaker 1>suit in good conscious. Uh maybe, man, maybe I'll do

0:35:17.719 --> 0:35:19.640
<v Speaker 1>like a fucking charity thing or something like that.

0:35:19.680 --> 0:35:25.840
<v Speaker 8>But yes, at one of your life.

0:35:23.120 --> 0:35:25.480
<v Speaker 1>That could be oh man, like, actually could be a

0:35:25.520 --> 0:35:27.600
<v Speaker 1>good idea to do it at a live Okay, I'll

0:35:27.600 --> 0:35:31.840
<v Speaker 1>think about that helped me out here, Brianna. I appreciate this, Brianna.

0:35:32.840 --> 0:35:34.440
<v Speaker 1>I just want to say, I know that you came

0:35:34.520 --> 0:35:37.600
<v Speaker 1>and you you and this is honestly, like been my

0:35:37.680 --> 0:35:40.799
<v Speaker 1>favorite part of doing this ship is. I know that

0:35:40.840 --> 0:35:46.080
<v Speaker 1>you came into this like feeling nervous and unsure if

0:35:46.080 --> 0:35:48.680
<v Speaker 1>you wanted to share anything. And uh, I just want

0:35:48.680 --> 0:35:51.440
<v Speaker 1>to say, I really appreciate you sharing all that stuff.

0:35:51.440 --> 0:35:56.840
<v Speaker 1>I know it was a tough thing. I'm proud of

0:35:56.880 --> 0:36:00.360
<v Speaker 1>you for making decisions in life that are difficult but

0:36:00.440 --> 0:36:02.399
<v Speaker 1>that you know are the right ones to make for

0:36:02.840 --> 0:36:04.640
<v Speaker 1>you and your happiness and what you want to do.

0:36:04.880 --> 0:36:07.680
<v Speaker 1>I hope that you don't feel limited. I hope that

0:36:07.760 --> 0:36:11.320
<v Speaker 1>you feel quite the opposite as you should, feel empowered,

0:36:11.360 --> 0:36:14.719
<v Speaker 1>feel infinite to do whatever it is you want. And

0:36:15.360 --> 0:36:17.520
<v Speaker 1>I I wish you good luck in the future.

0:36:17.560 --> 0:36:20.759
<v Speaker 7>Man, Thank you so much.

0:36:20.800 --> 0:36:25.399
<v Speaker 1>So have a good night you as well, Brianna. Ye

0:36:27.080 --> 0:36:30.080
<v Speaker 1>oh you know what, Okay, I'm gonna come out with this.

0:36:30.080 --> 0:36:34.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna come out with this. I I contradicted myself

0:36:34.440 --> 0:36:37.040
<v Speaker 1>in that phone call. I really did. I contradicted myself

0:36:37.480 --> 0:36:41.279
<v Speaker 1>because I've said and and and Actually I liked that.

0:36:41.360 --> 0:36:43.200
<v Speaker 1>I liked that phone call because it kind of made

0:36:43.239 --> 0:36:46.800
<v Speaker 1>me have to face something that I've said a lot.

0:36:47.000 --> 0:36:50.440
<v Speaker 1>I have said a lot on this podcast that the

0:36:50.440 --> 0:36:53.719
<v Speaker 1>the only irreversible things you could do to change your

0:36:53.800 --> 0:36:59.040
<v Speaker 1>life is have is get arrested, or have a kid.

0:37:00.040 --> 0:37:02.000
<v Speaker 1>And I had to face that one now because I

0:37:02.040 --> 0:37:06.280
<v Speaker 1>was telling her that she should feel as though life

0:37:06.320 --> 0:37:11.560
<v Speaker 1>is infinite and not super limited, and and what going

0:37:11.600 --> 0:37:14.319
<v Speaker 1>into that conversation, and I was really thinking about it

0:37:14.360 --> 0:37:16.120
<v Speaker 1>the whole time I was thinking. I was thinking about

0:37:16.120 --> 0:37:19.200
<v Speaker 1>like I was thinking about my parents and you know,

0:37:20.360 --> 0:37:24.319
<v Speaker 1>the lives that they live, thinking about other people I've

0:37:24.360 --> 0:37:28.000
<v Speaker 1>talked to on this podcast that our parents people you

0:37:28.000 --> 0:37:29.960
<v Speaker 1>know I've seen in media people. I know that our

0:37:29.960 --> 0:37:33.640
<v Speaker 1>parents and they do stuff, they really do. I feel

0:37:33.640 --> 0:37:35.640
<v Speaker 1>like I kind of ate my words at that conversation

0:37:35.640 --> 0:37:37.520
<v Speaker 1>because I was thinking about and they do do stuff,

0:37:38.400 --> 0:37:44.200
<v Speaker 1>they do fine time in their lives to do things

0:37:45.000 --> 0:37:48.359
<v Speaker 1>that they want to do. And especially Brionna, because Briann

0:37:48.400 --> 0:37:53.720
<v Speaker 1>I was so young that like her life could could

0:37:54.040 --> 0:37:57.000
<v Speaker 1>run a billion different ways. She could have the kid

0:37:57.840 --> 0:38:00.600
<v Speaker 1>and then be like, you know what I actually wants

0:38:00.600 --> 0:38:03.799
<v Speaker 1>to be fucking I'm trying to think of anything here.

0:38:03.960 --> 0:38:07.040
<v Speaker 1>I used painting is an example. I want to start

0:38:07.080 --> 0:38:12.239
<v Speaker 1>a podcast about the Sopranos. And I bet she could

0:38:12.239 --> 0:38:14.319
<v Speaker 1>find some time after she puts the kid to bed

0:38:15.320 --> 0:38:19.279
<v Speaker 1>to record her Sopranos episodes and do her thing, just any,

0:38:19.360 --> 0:38:22.000
<v Speaker 1>just anything, really, And I really do believe that. I

0:38:22.000 --> 0:38:27.279
<v Speaker 1>do believe that there's enough room in a life to

0:38:27.400 --> 0:38:30.480
<v Speaker 1>accomplish many things. And it sounded to me like the

0:38:30.560 --> 0:38:33.000
<v Speaker 1>forefront thing in her mind that she wanted to accomplish

0:38:33.680 --> 0:38:37.920
<v Speaker 1>was to be a mother, and so I'm really glad

0:38:37.920 --> 0:38:41.920
<v Speaker 1>that she's going after that accomplishment. And then you know,

0:38:42.239 --> 0:38:44.839
<v Speaker 1>on top of that, there is another thing I talk

0:38:44.880 --> 0:38:47.319
<v Speaker 1>about in the podcast all the time, is she had

0:38:47.320 --> 0:38:50.120
<v Speaker 1>this general idea of what she wanted to do, which

0:38:50.200 --> 0:38:56.000
<v Speaker 1>was to help people. Fantastic, beautiful, amazing, start with the kid, helpless,

0:38:56.000 --> 0:38:58.839
<v Speaker 1>shit out of the kid, and then eventually the kid

0:38:59.520 --> 0:39:02.880
<v Speaker 1>will will will will slowly over over the years, because

0:39:02.920 --> 0:39:04.640
<v Speaker 1>as much as we think life is short, life is

0:39:04.680 --> 0:39:12.760
<v Speaker 1>pretty long. Become self sufficient and give her some time

0:39:12.880 --> 0:39:15.120
<v Speaker 1>to help other people in whatever way she wants to.

0:39:15.160 --> 0:39:17.319
<v Speaker 1>If she wants to get involved in volunteer work, if

0:39:17.360 --> 0:39:20.759
<v Speaker 1>she wants to start some business, if she wants to

0:39:22.280 --> 0:39:25.520
<v Speaker 1>give a guy on a street five dollars. Whatever her

0:39:25.640 --> 0:39:27.960
<v Speaker 1>fucking way is of helping people. I think she'll be

0:39:28.000 --> 0:39:29.840
<v Speaker 1>able to do that, and I think that she'll be

0:39:29.880 --> 0:39:32.960
<v Speaker 1>able to live a nice and happy life. And I'm

0:39:32.960 --> 0:39:36.440
<v Speaker 1>excited for her, and I hope that she internalizes all

0:39:36.440 --> 0:39:41.960
<v Speaker 1>that and really feels it, because I do believe it beautiful.

0:39:44.440 --> 0:39:48.800
<v Speaker 1>Next call, Hello, Hello, is this Christian?

0:39:51.440 --> 0:39:54.520
<v Speaker 6>Yeah? It's way, am I You're at.

0:39:54.400 --> 0:39:58.960
<v Speaker 1>You said that just now? Like, did I annoy you?

0:39:59.680 --> 0:40:03.240
<v Speaker 1>I have? Did I apologize if I did? You seemed

0:40:03.239 --> 0:40:05.000
<v Speaker 1>you seemed a little bit annoyed. It's okay, I'm not

0:40:05.560 --> 0:40:13.040
<v Speaker 1>coming at you. I just want to know how you're feeling. Hello, Hey,

0:40:13.040 --> 0:40:13.600
<v Speaker 1>can you hear me?

0:40:17.040 --> 0:40:17.239
<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

0:40:17.320 --> 0:40:24.680
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, I could hear you? Am I in Yeah? Oh shit? Okay, No, No,

0:40:24.760 --> 0:40:25.520
<v Speaker 6>you didn't annoy me?

0:40:26.120 --> 0:40:28.480
<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well I you said hello in like a kind

0:40:28.520 --> 0:40:30.120
<v Speaker 1>of an annoyed way, and I just wanted to make

0:40:30.120 --> 0:40:33.799
<v Speaker 1>sure I'm not offended. If I annoyed you, I can handle.

0:40:34.360 --> 0:40:37.960
<v Speaker 6>Hello with a question mark. No, that was like a

0:40:38.000 --> 0:40:39.200
<v Speaker 6>hello with a question mark.

0:40:39.360 --> 0:40:40.040
<v Speaker 4>I'm sorry.

0:40:41.440 --> 0:40:42.640
<v Speaker 1>What is your name again?

0:40:44.280 --> 0:40:45.160
<v Speaker 6>My name is Christian?

0:40:46.520 --> 0:40:48.680
<v Speaker 1>Christian? What's going on with you?

0:40:48.760 --> 0:40:54.439
<v Speaker 6>Christian, Oh, not not much. Just here, you know, I mean,

0:40:55.200 --> 0:40:56.760
<v Speaker 6>I'm pretty I'm kind of stoned.

0:40:58.600 --> 0:41:00.799
<v Speaker 1>Okay, how stone is kind of stone? Like on a

0:41:00.800 --> 0:41:02.080
<v Speaker 1>scale from one to ten.

0:41:03.360 --> 0:41:08.520
<v Speaker 6>Oh fuck, i'd say a good solid like twelve.

0:41:09.680 --> 0:41:14.800
<v Speaker 1>You're a that's not kind of stoned, that's extremely.

0:41:18.480 --> 0:41:19.480
<v Speaker 6>Kind of sort of.

0:41:21.360 --> 0:41:23.319
<v Speaker 1>Okay. I'm gonna just you know, I'm not even I'm

0:41:23.320 --> 0:41:25.960
<v Speaker 1>not gonna trust. I'm not going to trust your first

0:41:26.000 --> 0:41:31.200
<v Speaker 1>hand experience. But judging by your actions and words over

0:41:31.200 --> 0:41:33.640
<v Speaker 1>the course of this phone call, you sound like you're

0:41:34.360 --> 0:41:36.279
<v Speaker 1>at an eight.

0:41:38.000 --> 0:41:42.200
<v Speaker 6>At an eight, okay, I mean that's that sounds plausible.

0:41:45.239 --> 0:41:48.759
<v Speaker 1>Christian, What's what's up with you? Man? Is there a

0:41:48.880 --> 0:41:51.840
<v Speaker 1>thing that you called in to want to talk about today?

0:41:52.719 --> 0:41:53.399
<v Speaker 4>Oh?

0:41:53.520 --> 0:41:59.080
<v Speaker 6>Yes, I actually harass my wife with a turtle puppet,

0:42:00.239 --> 0:42:02.840
<v Speaker 6>like outside in public.

0:42:05.239 --> 0:42:10.040
<v Speaker 1>You harass your wife with a turtle puppet outside in public?

0:42:11.600 --> 0:42:16.400
<v Speaker 6>Yes, I pretty much like make like very awkward moaning

0:42:16.480 --> 0:42:21.200
<v Speaker 6>noises to her like here, and it's the funniest thing,

0:42:21.520 --> 0:42:23.600
<v Speaker 6>Like her reaction is the most funniest thing.

0:42:25.280 --> 0:42:28.360
<v Speaker 1>Do you bring the turtle puppet around with you everywhere?

0:42:30.960 --> 0:42:31.480
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

0:42:32.320 --> 0:42:33.719
<v Speaker 6>Like literally everywhere?

0:42:37.680 --> 0:42:38.839
<v Speaker 1>How did you start doing this?

0:42:40.800 --> 0:42:41.320
<v Speaker 4>Basically?

0:42:41.360 --> 0:42:46.200
<v Speaker 6>What happened was we were at Barnes and Noble and

0:42:46.239 --> 0:42:49.480
<v Speaker 6>we were in the kids section because she, I mean

0:42:49.520 --> 0:42:54.759
<v Speaker 6>she was pregnant at the time, and I just saw

0:42:54.800 --> 0:42:59.120
<v Speaker 6>this turtle puppet. He pretty much looked like he looked

0:42:59.160 --> 0:43:02.480
<v Speaker 6>retardedly like cute. Can I say that?

0:43:03.719 --> 0:43:06.640
<v Speaker 1>Well you already did, okay.

0:43:06.320 --> 0:43:10.560
<v Speaker 6>I'm so sorry, And I just pretty much grabbed it

0:43:11.160 --> 0:43:15.239
<v Speaker 6>and just started like making a very awkward noises like

0:43:16.000 --> 0:43:20.239
<v Speaker 6>to her ear. And yeah, it was pretty much. It

0:43:20.280 --> 0:43:22.040
<v Speaker 6>was pretty funny because like a bunch of kids just

0:43:22.120 --> 0:43:24.799
<v Speaker 6>kind of like looked at me while was making like

0:43:24.840 --> 0:43:25.799
<v Speaker 6>these noises.

0:43:28.800 --> 0:43:31.400
<v Speaker 1>Okay, and so you you were trying out the puppet,

0:43:31.440 --> 0:43:33.680
<v Speaker 1>and then what made you decide to buy it?

0:43:37.120 --> 0:43:41.080
<v Speaker 6>Well, oh, dude, like her reaction pretty much, I literally

0:43:41.080 --> 0:43:42.080
<v Speaker 6>spent forty.

0:43:41.760 --> 0:43:43.560
<v Speaker 3>Dollars on this puppet.

0:43:44.920 --> 0:43:49.680
<v Speaker 1>Okay. And how long have you been doing this?

0:43:53.440 --> 0:44:00.280
<v Speaker 6>Hm, I would say about six months? Six months already.

0:44:00.560 --> 0:44:04.080
<v Speaker 1>Okay, so you do this, You've been doing it for

0:44:04.120 --> 0:44:07.000
<v Speaker 1>six months? And you say you've been doing it every

0:44:07.040 --> 0:44:08.839
<v Speaker 1>single time you guys go out in public.

0:44:10.880 --> 0:44:14.640
<v Speaker 6>Almost every time. Sometimes she like kind of asked me

0:44:14.719 --> 0:44:19.120
<v Speaker 6>to leave the puppet in the car, which I kind

0:44:19.160 --> 0:44:19.840
<v Speaker 6>of understand.

0:44:19.880 --> 0:44:22.640
<v Speaker 2>You know, are you.

0:44:22.760 --> 0:44:26.120
<v Speaker 1>Is your wife at home with you right now? Yes?

0:44:26.320 --> 0:44:26.799
<v Speaker 4>She is?

0:44:26.880 --> 0:44:28.640
<v Speaker 1>Actually, can I talk to her?

0:44:34.360 --> 0:44:34.600
<v Speaker 6>Hey?

0:44:34.640 --> 0:44:36.040
<v Speaker 4>Baby, it's Lyle.

0:44:36.600 --> 0:44:43.680
<v Speaker 6>He wants to talk to you. Yeah, about the puppet here.

0:44:45.560 --> 0:44:47.400
<v Speaker 9>This is not the way I wanted to meet Therapy

0:44:47.440 --> 0:44:54.600
<v Speaker 9>got go Hello, Hi, what is your name? I'm CALLI.

0:44:54.800 --> 0:45:00.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm Christian, Callie. It's nice to meet you. So, okay.

0:45:00.480 --> 0:45:05.279
<v Speaker 1>We got a perspective from Christian on this puppet situation,

0:45:05.800 --> 0:45:09.240
<v Speaker 1>and I was kind of wondering what your thoughts are

0:45:09.280 --> 0:45:12.600
<v Speaker 1>on it, because if I were married to him, I

0:45:12.640 --> 0:45:16.880
<v Speaker 1>would have gotten a divorce around at about maybe I

0:45:16.920 --> 0:45:18.319
<v Speaker 1>don't know what your guys like, how long you were

0:45:18.360 --> 0:45:21.239
<v Speaker 1>dating before, but I would have divorced him at about

0:45:21.280 --> 0:45:26.440
<v Speaker 1>a month of the puppet.

0:45:27.000 --> 0:45:28.280
<v Speaker 9>The thought cost my mind.

0:45:31.080 --> 0:45:31.840
<v Speaker 7>No, I don't.

0:45:32.400 --> 0:45:35.600
<v Speaker 9>He's just weird. I don't know. It was just something

0:45:35.640 --> 0:45:39.680
<v Speaker 9>that happened and he just kept doing it because people

0:45:39.680 --> 0:45:40.520
<v Speaker 9>thought it was funny.

0:45:40.680 --> 0:45:45.480
<v Speaker 1>So does he do other things like this? Or is

0:45:45.520 --> 0:45:49.480
<v Speaker 1>this the first kind of prank that he has pulled

0:45:49.480 --> 0:45:49.759
<v Speaker 1>on you?

0:45:51.719 --> 0:45:53.920
<v Speaker 9>I think that's pretty much. This is pretty much the

0:45:53.920 --> 0:45:56.640
<v Speaker 9>only prank he's done.

0:45:57.560 --> 0:46:01.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, is does he do other things to annoy you

0:46:02.000 --> 0:46:03.600
<v Speaker 1>or just the puppets?

0:46:03.920 --> 0:46:09.200
<v Speaker 9>Well? When you're married. Yeah, but I know, just just

0:46:09.239 --> 0:46:10.040
<v Speaker 9>that one thing.

0:46:10.160 --> 0:46:16.440
<v Speaker 1>Really, h What is it about Christian that made you

0:46:16.480 --> 0:46:20.879
<v Speaker 1>want to get married to him? I don't know.

0:46:20.960 --> 0:46:24.560
<v Speaker 9>We just like we were hanging out and we just

0:46:24.680 --> 0:46:27.600
<v Speaker 9>kind of clicked and never really left each other.

0:46:30.280 --> 0:46:34.239
<v Speaker 1>Is is there anything that you've done to enact any

0:46:34.320 --> 0:46:36.760
<v Speaker 1>kind of revenge against Christian for the puppet? Nonsense?

0:46:40.000 --> 0:46:43.719
<v Speaker 9>Things are in the works, not really, because I've been

0:46:43.760 --> 0:46:46.719
<v Speaker 9>pregnant so I couldn't. Really, I haven't really been able

0:46:46.760 --> 0:46:52.680
<v Speaker 9>to do anything, so not yet. But if you have

0:46:52.719 --> 0:46:54.040
<v Speaker 9>any ideas, I'm all here.

0:46:56.080 --> 0:46:57.840
<v Speaker 1>I would say you could get your own puppet, but

0:46:57.880 --> 0:46:59.920
<v Speaker 1>I don't think that would work because Christian sounds like

0:47:00.080 --> 0:47:03.120
<v Speaker 1>he like he likes puppets.

0:47:06.480 --> 0:47:07.719
<v Speaker 9>Yeah, you got me there.

0:47:08.160 --> 0:47:11.520
<v Speaker 1>Now what would now? What would Christian have to do

0:47:12.680 --> 0:47:16.120
<v Speaker 1>to make you leave him?

0:47:16.160 --> 0:47:19.000
<v Speaker 9>Honestly, the only thing he could do is probably like

0:47:19.120 --> 0:47:20.960
<v Speaker 9>cheat on me, and that would be the end.

0:47:23.440 --> 0:47:28.880
<v Speaker 1>What if he cheated on you but he used the

0:47:28.920 --> 0:47:32.880
<v Speaker 1>puppet and then claims that the puppet was cheating and

0:47:32.920 --> 0:47:36.960
<v Speaker 1>not him.

0:47:35.080 --> 0:47:37.640
<v Speaker 9>That's probably grounds for divorce too.

0:47:39.880 --> 0:47:40.920
<v Speaker 1>Even if it was the puppets.

0:47:42.400 --> 0:47:46.960
<v Speaker 9>Probably that I'm sorry, not not my thing.

0:47:48.120 --> 0:47:51.560
<v Speaker 1>Hmm, Well, something tells me that that you're not going

0:47:51.600 --> 0:47:52.480
<v Speaker 1>to have to worry about that.

0:47:54.120 --> 0:48:01.280
<v Speaker 9>No at all. This is your name again, the Cally Kelly.

0:48:03.840 --> 0:48:06.879
<v Speaker 1>Mm. How did you guys meet?

0:48:08.960 --> 0:48:18.480
<v Speaker 9>So it's a long story. So I actually Christian stopped no,

0:48:18.840 --> 0:48:22.120
<v Speaker 9>So that happened like a couple months into us being married.

0:48:22.920 --> 0:48:27.760
<v Speaker 9>So how so he knew some of the same people

0:48:27.840 --> 0:48:33.360
<v Speaker 9>I knew, but we actually never met. We were pretty

0:48:33.440 --> 0:48:36.160
<v Speaker 9>much like he was with one girl and I was

0:48:36.200 --> 0:48:40.359
<v Speaker 9>actually hanging out with her ex. And then we never

0:48:40.400 --> 0:48:47.879
<v Speaker 9>knew each other until two years ago, and then we

0:48:47.880 --> 0:48:50.719
<v Speaker 9>were like, what the fuck. I don't know if I

0:48:50.719 --> 0:48:54.960
<v Speaker 9>can curse on your podcast, but we were like, what

0:48:55.080 --> 0:48:57.600
<v Speaker 9>the hell? Like, we've never like, we were pretty much

0:48:57.960 --> 0:49:00.399
<v Speaker 9>in between people and we just never met.

0:49:02.880 --> 0:49:05.959
<v Speaker 1>Well, I find it very beautiful because it it takes

0:49:06.040 --> 0:49:09.680
<v Speaker 1>a lot of searching for a puppet guy to find

0:49:10.520 --> 0:49:14.319
<v Speaker 1>a lady who does not mind the puppets, and so

0:49:14.440 --> 0:49:19.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm very happy for both of you. Oh, thank you, Kelly.

0:49:19.200 --> 0:49:20.560
<v Speaker 1>Is there anything else that you want to say to

0:49:20.600 --> 0:49:22.040
<v Speaker 1>the people of the computer before.

0:49:21.800 --> 0:49:27.760
<v Speaker 9>We go, No, just thanks for having me, I guess.

0:49:28.800 --> 0:49:34.040
<v Speaker 1>Of course it has been very cool and interesting for

0:49:34.120 --> 0:49:37.319
<v Speaker 1>me as well. I still can't get over, and I

0:49:37.400 --> 0:49:39.520
<v Speaker 1>was gonna save this for my post call thoughts. But

0:49:40.000 --> 0:49:42.600
<v Speaker 1>it's not the fact that he occasionally bothers you with

0:49:42.600 --> 0:49:44.839
<v Speaker 1>the puppet. It's a fact that he doesn't occasionally bother

0:49:44.920 --> 0:49:46.360
<v Speaker 1>you with the puppet, that he bothers you with the

0:49:46.360 --> 0:49:49.319
<v Speaker 1>puppet every single day.

0:49:51.080 --> 0:49:54.600
<v Speaker 9>And he did it for the entire time I was pregnant.

0:49:57.480 --> 0:50:01.200
<v Speaker 1>Are you sure there's not something going on underneath him?

0:50:01.320 --> 0:50:02.480
<v Speaker 9>Yeah, I'm sure.

0:50:03.880 --> 0:50:05.520
<v Speaker 1>Okay, you know him better than I do, so I

0:50:05.560 --> 0:50:08.879
<v Speaker 1>trust you. Thank you for calling Kelly.

0:50:09.360 --> 0:50:10.000
<v Speaker 9>Thank you.

0:50:11.400 --> 0:50:16.279
<v Speaker 1>Every single day. I see, I wouldn't be surprised if

0:50:16.280 --> 0:50:20.400
<v Speaker 1>at one point he just stops talking at all, and

0:50:20.440 --> 0:50:23.040
<v Speaker 1>then she just finds herself married to the puppets.

0:50:25.680 --> 0:50:30.440
<v Speaker 4>Hello, Hello, Hi, Hey something man, I was just on

0:50:30.440 --> 0:50:30.880
<v Speaker 4>your stream.

0:50:32.280 --> 0:50:34.400
<v Speaker 1>What's uh? What's your name? Boss?

0:50:36.280 --> 0:50:37.160
<v Speaker 4>My name is Nathan.

0:50:38.520 --> 0:50:45.480
<v Speaker 1>Your name is Mason, Nathan Nathan. Oh, it says you'r Mason.

0:50:47.640 --> 0:50:50.640
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I think I think got it a little missed up.

0:50:51.080 --> 0:50:53.080
<v Speaker 1>Well, it's I mean, it sounds like it's Nathan. I

0:50:53.120 --> 0:50:55.640
<v Speaker 1>mean no, it sounds like it could be Mason. There's

0:50:55.640 --> 0:50:56.040
<v Speaker 1>a thun.

0:50:56.640 --> 0:51:04.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I have a friend named Mason. I'm actually I'm

0:51:04.040 --> 0:51:08.080
<v Speaker 4>eating right now, and I got a potato almost stuck

0:51:08.440 --> 0:51:10.960
<v Speaker 4>in my throat. I almost choked.

0:51:12.040 --> 0:51:15.680
<v Speaker 1>Really, what were you thinking while you were while you

0:51:15.719 --> 0:51:17.080
<v Speaker 1>were almost choking and dying?

0:51:19.920 --> 0:51:21.799
<v Speaker 4>Get some water, because that's what I have right now

0:51:22.840 --> 0:51:23.520
<v Speaker 4>in my position.

0:51:24.600 --> 0:51:28.120
<v Speaker 1>So, Mason, Mason, I'm gonna just I'm gonna kind of

0:51:28.160 --> 0:51:31.480
<v Speaker 1>alternate between Mason and Nathan because I don't remember names

0:51:31.520 --> 0:51:33.720
<v Speaker 1>and I don't care anymore, because I just I can't

0:51:33.760 --> 0:51:37.200
<v Speaker 1>do it. I've tried. I just Mason and Nathan are

0:51:37.239 --> 0:51:40.319
<v Speaker 1>the same name essentially. But I am talking to you

0:51:40.440 --> 0:51:42.400
<v Speaker 1>right now. I'm on the phone with you, and me

0:51:42.520 --> 0:51:45.759
<v Speaker 1>knowing your name is not that important, and I don't

0:51:45.760 --> 0:51:48.000
<v Speaker 1>care if that sounded me. That's it's because it's true.

0:51:49.480 --> 0:51:51.800
<v Speaker 4>I don't know that. That's why I love you, Lyle.

0:51:52.239 --> 0:51:53.040
<v Speaker 4>I love you so much.

0:51:53.560 --> 0:51:56.359
<v Speaker 1>Mason, tell me why you called in today, if there

0:51:56.440 --> 0:51:56.920
<v Speaker 1>was a reason.

0:51:56.960 --> 0:51:57.440
<v Speaker 2>Even so.

0:52:00.480 --> 0:52:05.200
<v Speaker 4>My kind of like soul basis so I kind of

0:52:05.280 --> 0:52:08.719
<v Speaker 4>just I just wanted to talk to you, basically. But

0:52:08.760 --> 0:52:12.960
<v Speaker 4>what I really wanted to, like say, was time. That's

0:52:12.960 --> 0:52:15.520
<v Speaker 4>why I told the greener. I was talking about time

0:52:15.600 --> 0:52:19.120
<v Speaker 4>and the concept of time and how we're tracked in

0:52:19.160 --> 0:52:23.759
<v Speaker 4>this reality of time is inevitable, right, But what if

0:52:24.200 --> 0:52:29.520
<v Speaker 4>time didn't exist, Everything's still went the same, but time

0:52:29.680 --> 0:52:30.320
<v Speaker 4>was irrelevant.

0:52:32.920 --> 0:52:38.680
<v Speaker 1>Mace, Are you high right now? Mm hmm, I'm not okay, okay,

0:52:40.920 --> 0:52:46.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm just thinking about time. What if time didn't exist?

0:52:47.440 --> 0:52:49.480
<v Speaker 1>What time is it for you? Right now? Where you live?

0:52:52.080 --> 0:52:57.000
<v Speaker 1>It's nine five, nine forty five. Tell me, Mason, what

0:52:57.080 --> 0:52:59.719
<v Speaker 1>does nine forty five even mean?

0:53:01.800 --> 0:53:04.720
<v Speaker 4>Exactly exactly? You're proving my point, right.

0:53:04.600 --> 0:53:07.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm proving your point right. What is nine forty five

0:53:07.200 --> 0:53:10.040
<v Speaker 1>even more? Tell me? Tell me what what does nine

0:53:10.120 --> 0:53:12.480
<v Speaker 1>forty five mean to you? Mason? I want to know.

0:53:14.760 --> 0:53:19.719
<v Speaker 4>So what it means to me? So time time is

0:53:19.760 --> 0:53:23.040
<v Speaker 4>inevitably restricted, right, So nine forty five to me means,

0:53:23.160 --> 0:53:27.040
<v Speaker 4>you know it's that late, right, like, oh, it's this time.

0:53:27.800 --> 0:53:30.600
<v Speaker 4>It's pretty late. You know, it's nine forty five, not

0:53:30.719 --> 0:53:35.719
<v Speaker 4>that late, but it's kind of getting there. But like

0:53:36.000 --> 0:53:38.440
<v Speaker 4>what I was saying, what if that didn't even matter?

0:53:42.239 --> 0:53:42.440
<v Speaker 8>You know?

0:53:43.920 --> 0:53:47.719
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmmm. So you're you're you're trying to live in

0:53:47.719 --> 0:53:52.400
<v Speaker 1>a world where the time does not matter. Where nine five?

0:53:53.320 --> 0:53:56.080
<v Speaker 1>I mean, let's see nine forty five. It's nighttime. What

0:53:56.160 --> 0:53:58.160
<v Speaker 1>are things that people don't typically do in the nighttime?

0:53:58.200 --> 0:54:01.440
<v Speaker 1>They typically don't eat pancakes, and you could go downstairs

0:54:01.440 --> 0:54:05.920
<v Speaker 1>make yourself some in a rebellion against the clock. But

0:54:06.360 --> 0:54:11.759
<v Speaker 1>what else don't people do at night? They don't what

0:54:11.880 --> 0:54:13.160
<v Speaker 1>to give me some stuff? What?

0:54:13.160 --> 0:54:13.359
<v Speaker 4>What?

0:54:13.360 --> 0:54:15.360
<v Speaker 1>What? What are some things that you would do right now?

0:54:16.400 --> 0:54:20.520
<v Speaker 1>At certain times you wouldn't do it other times?

0:54:20.120 --> 0:54:26.040
<v Speaker 4>Get ready, like get really dressed up, you know you,

0:54:26.520 --> 0:54:28.279
<v Speaker 4>I mean only if you're going to a party, but

0:54:28.400 --> 0:54:32.759
<v Speaker 4>like at a casual, you know, Friday night, and then

0:54:32.800 --> 0:54:35.440
<v Speaker 4>you're just gonna go to the store. You know, on

0:54:35.480 --> 0:54:38.920
<v Speaker 4>a Friday night, you don't get you don't get dressed

0:54:38.920 --> 0:54:39.640
<v Speaker 4>to go to the store.

0:54:40.000 --> 0:54:43.480
<v Speaker 1>Right No, No, if you really wanted to, you could

0:54:43.600 --> 0:54:45.520
<v Speaker 1>right now get dressed up in a suit and go

0:54:45.560 --> 0:54:48.080
<v Speaker 1>to this store. Mason, I have another question for you.

0:54:49.040 --> 0:54:53.760
<v Speaker 1>It says here that you claim you've been getting bullied

0:54:53.800 --> 0:54:55.560
<v Speaker 1>a lot and you don't know what to do.

0:54:55.800 --> 0:54:58.759
<v Speaker 4>Okay, let's get into this.

0:54:58.800 --> 0:55:00.840
<v Speaker 1>What tell tell me? Tell me about this because we

0:55:00.840 --> 0:55:03.680
<v Speaker 1>could argue about time forever, but I you know here

0:55:03.719 --> 0:55:06.000
<v Speaker 1>I could talk about time with anyone, but I can

0:55:06.040 --> 0:55:10.240
<v Speaker 1>only talk about your life experience with you. So what's

0:55:10.320 --> 0:55:11.440
<v Speaker 1>what's what's going on?

0:55:14.520 --> 0:55:19.239
<v Speaker 4>So? I mean, there's just these little hooligans, you know,

0:55:19.640 --> 0:55:23.560
<v Speaker 4>a little messing with me. And what I told the

0:55:23.560 --> 0:55:25.680
<v Speaker 4>screener is, you know, I don't I don't really care.

0:55:25.960 --> 0:55:28.439
<v Speaker 4>You know, I don't really care that they're gonna mess

0:55:28.480 --> 0:55:30.279
<v Speaker 4>with me. I don't know how to deal with all that, right,

0:55:30.520 --> 0:55:34.600
<v Speaker 4>you know, it's easy, but it's to the point where

0:55:34.600 --> 0:55:35.480
<v Speaker 4>it's annoying.

0:55:36.960 --> 0:55:38.640
<v Speaker 1>What are these people doing to you? Exactly?

0:55:40.800 --> 0:55:44.000
<v Speaker 4>So, like I told him already, you know, it's like

0:55:44.120 --> 0:55:46.920
<v Speaker 4>back off when alone. I don't like you, like I

0:55:46.920 --> 0:55:48.719
<v Speaker 4>really don't like you. I don't care if you'll beat

0:55:48.760 --> 0:55:49.080
<v Speaker 4>me up.

0:55:49.800 --> 0:55:53.600
<v Speaker 1>Well, Mason, tell me what what are what types of

0:55:53.600 --> 0:55:55.040
<v Speaker 1>things specifically are they doing to you?

0:55:57.040 --> 0:56:04.560
<v Speaker 4>So they're like, I feel like calling me all these

0:56:04.760 --> 0:56:08.120
<v Speaker 4>names they always say, uh so it's kind of a

0:56:08.120 --> 0:56:11.960
<v Speaker 4>bit of a little bit racist because I'm Mexican, right

0:56:12.760 --> 0:56:16.040
<v Speaker 4>they always say, and I'm half an American but they

0:56:16.080 --> 0:56:18.960
<v Speaker 4>don't know that. But they always been calling me like beanner,

0:56:20.239 --> 0:56:25.520
<v Speaker 4>you know, all this racial mumbo jumble or whatever it's

0:56:26.800 --> 0:56:29.520
<v Speaker 4>And it's like and it's not to the point where

0:56:29.520 --> 0:56:34.040
<v Speaker 4>it's just names. It's like physical sometimes you know, push me,

0:56:35.680 --> 0:56:39.200
<v Speaker 4>knock me on the head, you know, I guess annoying

0:56:40.080 --> 0:56:40.560
<v Speaker 4>mm hmmm.

0:56:42.360 --> 0:56:46.160
<v Speaker 1>What have you been doing lately in response to all

0:56:46.160 --> 0:56:46.440
<v Speaker 1>of this?

0:56:48.680 --> 0:56:54.160
<v Speaker 4>So, like I said, I don't really have I mean,

0:56:54.200 --> 0:56:57.160
<v Speaker 4>I have a solution, but it's not the right solution.

0:56:58.080 --> 0:57:01.759
<v Speaker 1>Okay, tell me what you have as the solution that

0:57:01.800 --> 0:57:03.080
<v Speaker 1>you believe is not the right solution.

0:57:07.960 --> 0:57:12.160
<v Speaker 4>I think because you don't like I think I would

0:57:12.520 --> 0:57:14.080
<v Speaker 4>want to fight them.

0:57:14.160 --> 0:57:19.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, okay, so you're you're considering physically fighting them back.

0:57:20.800 --> 0:57:23.920
<v Speaker 4>Yes, but I know that's a wrong option. But you know,

0:57:24.680 --> 0:57:28.120
<v Speaker 4>if they're pushing me, playing a hands on me, or whatever,

0:57:29.680 --> 0:57:31.120
<v Speaker 4>I can to have a reason to.

0:57:33.560 --> 0:57:37.960
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmmm. You know, this is tough. I'm trying to

0:57:38.000 --> 0:57:40.360
<v Speaker 1>think of, you know, trying to think of what I

0:57:40.360 --> 0:57:47.240
<v Speaker 1>would say if you were my son, Mason. Mhm uh.

0:57:47.600 --> 0:57:58.720
<v Speaker 1>You know, look, I believe that cosmically right, Mason. You

0:57:58.760 --> 0:58:02.240
<v Speaker 1>live your life trying to do the best that you can,

0:58:03.440 --> 0:58:05.480
<v Speaker 1>trying to be nice to people. I know that you

0:58:05.520 --> 0:58:09.680
<v Speaker 1>don't deserve any of the things that people are saying

0:58:09.760 --> 0:58:15.280
<v Speaker 1>to you or doing to you physically, and I hope,

0:58:15.360 --> 0:58:21.600
<v Speaker 1>I hope that you are taking solace in that that

0:58:21.720 --> 0:58:28.040
<v Speaker 1>you know that the most important thing is that you

0:58:28.200 --> 0:58:35.720
<v Speaker 1>are living in a way that is in line with

0:58:35.880 --> 0:58:42.240
<v Speaker 1>how you feel you shouldn't know who are you? Who

0:58:42.280 --> 0:58:48.320
<v Speaker 1>you're talking to? Is that your real dad? Yes, let's

0:58:48.400 --> 0:58:48.800
<v Speaker 1>ye up to.

0:58:50.920 --> 0:58:52.840
<v Speaker 4>He just told me a digg a shower.

0:58:53.120 --> 0:58:56.640
<v Speaker 1>Have you talked to him about this? Uh?

0:58:57.960 --> 0:58:58.200
<v Speaker 9>I do?

0:58:59.720 --> 0:59:01.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah? What say?

0:59:02.560 --> 0:59:07.160
<v Speaker 4>He just said? Don't don't listen to him?

0:59:07.200 --> 0:59:08.880
<v Speaker 1>I think that's smart. I don't think. I don't think

0:59:08.920 --> 0:59:13.120
<v Speaker 1>you should fight these guys, you know, because I I

0:59:13.240 --> 0:59:17.760
<v Speaker 1>this is some weird hippie bullshit, But I do believe

0:59:17.760 --> 0:59:24.720
<v Speaker 1>it it takes more strength to not fight than to fight, right,

0:59:24.760 --> 0:59:29.960
<v Speaker 1>because that's you. It's you overpowering your urges to do

0:59:30.800 --> 0:59:34.200
<v Speaker 1>what you believe is correct. And you said it yourself

0:59:34.240 --> 0:59:36.120
<v Speaker 1>that you know that that's not the right answer for you,

0:59:36.760 --> 0:59:41.520
<v Speaker 1>and so I think when you're evaluating yourself again, that

0:59:41.520 --> 0:59:43.440
<v Speaker 1>that it that it takes more strength not to fight,

0:59:43.480 --> 0:59:48.360
<v Speaker 1>too and for you to control your emotions in such

0:59:48.360 --> 0:59:52.520
<v Speaker 1>a way that allows you to act how you believe

0:59:52.640 --> 0:59:55.160
<v Speaker 1>is the right way to. And I hope that's what

0:59:55.200 --> 1:00:02.080
<v Speaker 1>you do, yees, Because again, Cosm, I don't believe that

1:00:02.120 --> 1:00:08.720
<v Speaker 1>there's any kind of a charmatic spirit that necessarily enforces this,

1:00:10.400 --> 1:00:14.280
<v Speaker 1>but I do think that you know, the people who

1:00:14.320 --> 1:00:18.360
<v Speaker 1>are bullying you will eventually grow up and recognize the

1:00:18.480 --> 1:00:22.280
<v Speaker 1>error of their ways and repent in however way they do,

1:00:23.080 --> 1:00:27.400
<v Speaker 1>and that things will work out for you as well,

1:00:27.960 --> 1:00:32.920
<v Speaker 1>And that only really can trouble come from you giving

1:00:32.960 --> 1:00:35.840
<v Speaker 1>into them, because that's the real thing, right If these

1:00:35.920 --> 1:00:40.000
<v Speaker 1>if these people, you know, these people can call you names,

1:00:40.040 --> 1:00:43.760
<v Speaker 1>they can push you around, whatever, But as long as

1:00:43.840 --> 1:00:48.440
<v Speaker 1>you are not allowing yourself to be emotionally rattled or

1:00:48.480 --> 1:00:53.040
<v Speaker 1>have your actions dictated by what they're telling you, then

1:00:53.080 --> 1:00:57.400
<v Speaker 1>they don't have power over you. It's when you compromise

1:00:57.480 --> 1:01:01.600
<v Speaker 1>your values by fighting back against them is when they

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<v Speaker 1>have won because they got to. But it doesn't sound

1:01:04.720 --> 1:01:08.080
<v Speaker 1>like they did. And I'm glad to hear that. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>what's up?

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<v Speaker 4>What's your what's your favorite bands? Do you have any

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<v Speaker 4>favorite bands?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh? Band like music bands?

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<v Speaker 4>Yes?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh no, I don't really listen to music. Oh cool, Nathan,

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<v Speaker 1>Is there anything else you want to say to the

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<v Speaker 1>people of the computer before we go?

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<v Speaker 4>Listen to listen to Lyol on Spotify and important. Exactly. Man,

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<v Speaker 4>he's the most beautiful man in existence. He deserves to

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<v Speaker 4>be a praise. Yeah, and that's it.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, thank you for calling Nathan. Yeah, that was that

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<v Speaker 1>was an interesting one. I'm always you know, I'm always

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<v Speaker 1>open to being wrong about that kind of stuff. I

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<v Speaker 1>know that some people have the different opinions or or

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<v Speaker 1>you know, have different experiences with dealing with being antagonized.

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<v Speaker 1>And I don't think I'm necessarily right. It's just my

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<v Speaker 1>own personal philosophy about it. Who knows other people might

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<v Speaker 1>be like, no, you have to fight. There's a song.

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<v Speaker 1>Fuck who sings that song? Kenny Rogers? Kenny Rogers. Kenny

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<v Speaker 1>Rogers has this song called Coward of the County, and

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<v Speaker 1>the thesis of it is the exact opposite of what

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<v Speaker 1>I just said. So if you listened to what I

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<v Speaker 1>just said and you agreed with it, go listen to

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<v Speaker 1>Kenyan Rodgers Coward of the Country, No, Coward of the County,

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<v Speaker 1>and then because he gives an alternative point of view,

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<v Speaker 1>and then come back and then make up your mind.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I agree with the message, but

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<v Speaker 1>it's a good song. Shout out to Kenny Rodgers.

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<v Speaker 5>Ken goes on the line taking your phone calls every night,

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<v Speaker 5>the beak goes to his hide.

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<v Speaker 1>He's teaching you cloud in the mind.

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<v Speaker 7>Of your life.

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<v Speaker 1>But he's not really an expert