1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:04,000 Speaker 1: Hey everyone, it's Sophia. Welcome back to Work in Progress. 2 00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:18,759 Speaker 1: Today's guest is a historian and an author, but she 3 00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:21,200 Speaker 1: is most well known for the power and scope of 4 00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:24,200 Speaker 1: her activism. Blair Imani is a speaker and a writer, 5 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:28,880 Speaker 1: working hard to uplift voices, stories, and histories that have 6 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:34,080 Speaker 1: been systemically underrepresented or intentionally blocked. Perhaps her best known 7 00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:37,159 Speaker 1: pushed and that is her viral video series Smarter in 8 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:41,159 Speaker 1: Seconds and If Shorts Aren't Your thing. Her ted X 9 00:00:41,200 --> 00:00:46,279 Speaker 1: talk Queer and Muslim Nothing to Reconcile also reached viral status. 10 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:48,600 Speaker 1: Blair has been present on the front lines of Black 11 00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:53,080 Speaker 1: Lives Matter, published two books and most recently her third, 12 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 1: that give historical context and credit to the people are 13 00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 1: textbooks most often leave out. She's been profiled by The 14 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,640 Speaker 1: New y Times, invited to speak all over the world, 15 00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:06,440 Speaker 1: and has even been arrested for peacefully protesting police violence 16 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:10,160 Speaker 1: in Louisiana. From stages to the front lines, Blair shows up. 17 00:01:10,560 --> 00:01:13,640 Speaker 1: She is an absolutely admirable force for good and acceptance 18 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:16,200 Speaker 1: in the world, and I am so honored to have 19 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:18,160 Speaker 1: her on the show today. Those of you who have 20 00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:20,039 Speaker 1: heard of her or followed her work know what to 21 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,280 Speaker 1: treat this episode will be and for those of you 22 00:01:22,319 --> 00:01:24,919 Speaker 1: who don't yet, well, I could not pick a better 23 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:41,160 Speaker 1: person to get to introduce you to enjoy. Well Blair, 24 00:01:41,200 --> 00:01:44,080 Speaker 1: I'm so excited to have you here today. I know 25 00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:46,600 Speaker 1: that before we jumped into the interview, we were just 26 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 1: talking about how much fun it is when people who 27 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:51,440 Speaker 1: have you know, shown up to support one another and 28 00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:55,040 Speaker 1: causes and uh, you know, who witness each other working 29 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:57,120 Speaker 1: in the world. Actually you know, get to get off 30 00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:00,080 Speaker 1: of Instagram and chat for real. So I'm just so 31 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:03,320 Speaker 1: excited that you're here. And I think for me as 32 00:02:03,360 --> 00:02:05,800 Speaker 1: like my star has been rising, it's been really cool 33 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:08,120 Speaker 1: to be on the podcast that I'm listening to often, 34 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:11,280 Speaker 1: and it's like, so it's so cool and like weird 35 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:14,200 Speaker 1: also to like be able to like see you while 36 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:16,120 Speaker 1: also hearing your voice because I'm so used to just 37 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:21,000 Speaker 1: like this disembodied voice. It's a great combo. I'm so excited. 38 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:23,840 Speaker 1: That means a lot. Thank you for for loving the 39 00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:26,960 Speaker 1: show and we're really excited to have you on today. 40 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:31,560 Speaker 1: So I really like to go back and and find 41 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:35,280 Speaker 1: out where guests have sort of started their journeys because 42 00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:38,280 Speaker 1: I think so often, as you said, when your your 43 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:41,200 Speaker 1: star is rising, when you become a public speaker and author, 44 00:02:41,639 --> 00:02:44,040 Speaker 1: people meet you where you are. They're learning in real 45 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:47,840 Speaker 1: time with you. And I'm always very curious about how 46 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:52,080 Speaker 1: the incredible folks I said across from we're shaped before 47 00:02:52,120 --> 00:02:58,280 Speaker 1: they became go to teachers, online or household names. And 48 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:01,320 Speaker 1: so I know that you grew up in Los Angeles 49 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:04,680 Speaker 1: as well, which always makes me excited to meet fellow Angelina's. 50 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:07,680 Speaker 1: What part of l A did you grow up in? 51 00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:11,200 Speaker 1: What what made this place feel like home to you 52 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:14,200 Speaker 1: as a kid. I'm also from the Rose City. I'm 53 00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:18,480 Speaker 1: from Pasadena, yes, And so it's been like so cool 54 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:21,160 Speaker 1: because you're also from Pasadena. I mean I was born 55 00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:24,040 Speaker 1: in Cedar Sinai in l A. But then I grew 56 00:03:24,160 --> 00:03:26,200 Speaker 1: up in Pasadena. I went to St. Mark's and I 57 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:29,400 Speaker 1: ended up going to school in San Reno. And I mean, 58 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:33,480 Speaker 1: first of all, it smells amazing here, like living in 59 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:37,880 Speaker 1: different areas. I think that like having a hometown that is, 60 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:40,160 Speaker 1: you know, the home of the Rose Bowl and all 61 00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:42,760 Speaker 1: of these beautiful, very like highly esthetic things, and then 62 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:45,840 Speaker 1: it being so close to like the acting world and 63 00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 1: the whole movie film industry and being able to step 64 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:50,520 Speaker 1: back from it and be in a place where there's 65 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:52,880 Speaker 1: like cal Tech right here in JPL, not far away. 66 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:55,720 Speaker 1: It's a really unique place that feels like a small 67 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:57,680 Speaker 1: town but of course, like you're right outside of Los 68 00:03:57,680 --> 00:04:01,600 Speaker 1: Angeles um having so many museums like the Huntington's. I mean, like, 69 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:03,760 Speaker 1: is this an ad for Pasadena or my own life story? 70 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,920 Speaker 1: Like you know, like to say, I'm into it. I 71 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:08,960 Speaker 1: feel everything you do. And it's so it's so wonderful 72 00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:11,520 Speaker 1: and it's been cool, like as I've gotten older instead 73 00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 1: of being like where are you from Pasadena? Where is 74 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,440 Speaker 1: that to people being like, oh my god, I love Pasadena. 75 00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:18,560 Speaker 1: And so it's just a really unique place. There's such 76 00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:21,960 Speaker 1: a wonderful, like family oriented environment here and there's so 77 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:23,839 Speaker 1: many things to do, Like there's so many ways to 78 00:04:23,839 --> 00:04:29,000 Speaker 1: be exposed to perspectives and lives and backgrounds that aren't 79 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:31,039 Speaker 1: your own that it really makes you kind of like 80 00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:35,520 Speaker 1: this global citizen, just you know, like straight from being born, 81 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:37,360 Speaker 1: because I remember having friends who didn't speak the same 82 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,400 Speaker 1: language as me and going to school with them, and 83 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,560 Speaker 1: not everybody has that experience of being able to like 84 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:47,520 Speaker 1: create your own self understanding and identity while also seeing 85 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:50,200 Speaker 1: so much difference and being comfortable in that. I think 86 00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:51,880 Speaker 1: a lot of folks, you know, moved to New York 87 00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:54,200 Speaker 1: and moved to l A and they're like, Wow, I 88 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,640 Speaker 1: don't know anybody who is from my hometown, or I 89 00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:58,719 Speaker 1: don't know anybody who looks like me. But I've always 90 00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:00,799 Speaker 1: grown up with that, and it's been that place of comfort, 91 00:05:00,839 --> 00:05:04,840 Speaker 1: and I think it's definitely grounded my understanding with just 92 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:08,400 Speaker 1: anti racism, anti oppression work because that's been my upbringing. 93 00:05:09,440 --> 00:05:15,000 Speaker 1: I love that. Yeah, I'm always so interested in getting 94 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:19,600 Speaker 1: into you know, we're we're having conversations about privilege and 95 00:05:19,839 --> 00:05:22,000 Speaker 1: what that looks like and who has it and who 96 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:24,520 Speaker 1: has it in what ways? And I think there is, 97 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:28,640 Speaker 1: actually there is a positive type of privilege that I 98 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,800 Speaker 1: think you're speaking about and that I know I experienced 99 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 1: as a kid, which I call the privilege of exposure. Yes, Yes, 100 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:39,719 Speaker 1: the incredible good fortune of growing up around so many 101 00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:43,520 Speaker 1: people who come from different places, different cultures, different foods, 102 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:48,520 Speaker 1: different traditions, different ideas. And and I think about how 103 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,240 Speaker 1: you're right in this town that we both grew up 104 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:53,560 Speaker 1: in that really does in many ways feel like a 105 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:56,279 Speaker 1: small town, even though it's just outside of Los Angeles. 106 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,720 Speaker 1: I grew up around so many people who didn't look 107 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 1: any like me, and who spoke different languages and whose 108 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:08,120 Speaker 1: traditions I had the privilege of being exposed to and 109 00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:13,200 Speaker 1: learning about. And I I wish that for more people, 110 00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:16,479 Speaker 1: and certainly for more kids, because it does give you 111 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:23,040 Speaker 1: a much more potential filled arena in which to develop yourself. 112 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:26,480 Speaker 1: That is so actually said like I think, especially as 113 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:30,240 Speaker 1: it relates to disability. That was something that was very 114 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:33,640 Speaker 1: much kind of the groundwork of my growing up process. 115 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 1: My younger sister is autistic and bipolar, and she was 116 00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:41,440 Speaker 1: my parents fought really hard to have her experience everything 117 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:44,240 Speaker 1: that every other kid would have, but also to understand 118 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:48,320 Speaker 1: things like if Chelsea needs more accommodations, that's not something 119 00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:51,640 Speaker 1: that's extra, it's what she needs, that's her baseline. And 120 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 1: so the schools that we went to, like we ended 121 00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:56,880 Speaker 1: up moving from Pasadena schools to San Marino and we 122 00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:59,360 Speaker 1: had speech therapy and I went to speech therapy too, 123 00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:03,839 Speaker 1: And growing up and doing early childhood development gives you 124 00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:06,599 Speaker 1: kind of an understanding of early childhood development. And so 125 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,840 Speaker 1: it's totally like the more work that I do educating 126 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:14,880 Speaker 1: people about things like consent or you know, different months 127 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:20,480 Speaker 1: of celebration, pride, lgbtq um, you know, identity and experience, 128 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 1: the more I'm recognizing that it came from growing up 129 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:27,280 Speaker 1: here and just having to learn about different people, not 130 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:28,880 Speaker 1: as a matter of it being a burden, but it 131 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:32,280 Speaker 1: really being like an exciting thing. Like I wasn't raised Muslim. 132 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:34,760 Speaker 1: I was raised Christian, and I converted to Islam in college. 133 00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 1: But I remember the solution to the kind of growing 134 00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:41,400 Speaker 1: Islamophobia after nine eleven was to have somebody whose family 135 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:43,920 Speaker 1: was Muslim come and talk to us about Islam, and 136 00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:45,800 Speaker 1: we learned about the five Pillars of Islam, and it 137 00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:49,160 Speaker 1: was like every chance to open people up to your 138 00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:53,000 Speaker 1: experience or to somebody else's background was something that was 139 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:56,239 Speaker 1: jumped towards. Like I gave many presentations during Black History 140 00:07:56,240 --> 00:07:59,040 Speaker 1: Month growing up, which is very much apt because that's 141 00:07:59,040 --> 00:08:00,640 Speaker 1: what I do for a living, is give, you know, 142 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:04,400 Speaker 1: public speeches and stuff. We had Chinese New Year celebrations. 143 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:08,800 Speaker 1: We just it was just this perfect, very sheltered sheltered 144 00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:12,080 Speaker 1: from bias and sheltered from these instances of oppression, which 145 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:14,120 Speaker 1: I'm sure we're still there, but we're in the forefront, 146 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:17,200 Speaker 1: and then I like went to school in Louisiana where 147 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:20,640 Speaker 1: people had never met a Jewish person, for example, or 148 00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:24,000 Speaker 1: a Muslim person for that matter, and this concept of 149 00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:26,640 Speaker 1: otherness being super duper pronounced. And I felt like I 150 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:29,840 Speaker 1: went from this utopia of especially at that time because 151 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 1: Barack Obama was running for office when I was an adolescent, 152 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,960 Speaker 1: and this idea of like a post racial America. So 153 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:40,440 Speaker 1: I went from that to like very stark named biases 154 00:08:40,559 --> 00:08:43,840 Speaker 1: and racist biases that people had in Louisiana, not that 155 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:45,840 Speaker 1: it was unique from anywhere else in the country. I 156 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:48,040 Speaker 1: definitely don't believe that like the South is more racist 157 00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:49,920 Speaker 1: than other places. I just think that the way that 158 00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,520 Speaker 1: it is expressed is definitely different. And that's the kind 159 00:08:52,559 --> 00:08:57,120 Speaker 1: of the culture culture shock, but kind of being like 160 00:08:57,200 --> 00:09:00,040 Speaker 1: socialized to believe, but no, everyone's inherently good, and I 161 00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:02,920 Speaker 1: still believe that to it kind of being like don't 162 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:06,000 Speaker 1: sit with us, you're black. Like going from those different 163 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,839 Speaker 1: polls really activated me in a way that I felt 164 00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:14,080 Speaker 1: was very difficult. But I'm happy that I grew from it. 165 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,600 Speaker 1: Like I don't want to say I'm happy it happened, 166 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:18,040 Speaker 1: because I'm definitely not, but I think that it made 167 00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:20,720 Speaker 1: me aware that not everywhere is like Pasadena, and that, 168 00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:23,160 Speaker 1: like you said, I do wish that for everybody. And 169 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:25,400 Speaker 1: it made me figure out how do I reconcile these 170 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,959 Speaker 1: things where I'm not shaming people for their lack of exposure, 171 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,880 Speaker 1: but figuring out what steps we can take to make 172 00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:35,200 Speaker 1: everybody more smart and compassionate about our fellow experiences, even 173 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:38,280 Speaker 1: if it's not the path that we walked ourselves. M 174 00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:43,960 Speaker 1: I think that's so beautiful, especially because and I know 175 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:47,880 Speaker 1: you probably have these moments where you know, I'm rolling 176 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:49,600 Speaker 1: my eyes even thinking about it, and I don't want 177 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:52,160 Speaker 1: to project that you also roll your eyes when this 178 00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:54,120 Speaker 1: gets said. But I think so many of us who 179 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:57,920 Speaker 1: are from these quote coastal places get frustrated by the 180 00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:02,280 Speaker 1: way that we're painted as being out of touch. Um 181 00:10:02,360 --> 00:10:04,880 Speaker 1: because as you said, there are things about where we 182 00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:08,440 Speaker 1: grew up that really do feel like small towns in 183 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:12,040 Speaker 1: so many places across the country. UM. And I've I've 184 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:15,040 Speaker 1: experienced that living all over the country for work, you know, 185 00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:18,000 Speaker 1: going and making TV shows and movies, and you know, 186 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:20,040 Speaker 1: big towns and small towns in the Midwest and in 187 00:10:20,080 --> 00:10:23,440 Speaker 1: the South, and um, and one of the things that 188 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:26,040 Speaker 1: really strikes me is that we get told that we 189 00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:30,160 Speaker 1: just don't know something, when in fact, we know so 190 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:34,640 Speaker 1: much because we're exposed to so much. The privilege of exposure, 191 00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:37,199 Speaker 1: of growing up in a place that is culturally diverse, 192 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:43,040 Speaker 1: linguistically diverse, experientially diverse, is that you're not afraid of difference. 193 00:10:43,160 --> 00:10:46,280 Speaker 1: You're curious about it. And when you go to places 194 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:51,120 Speaker 1: that because of economic oppression or because of you know, 195 00:10:51,240 --> 00:10:54,960 Speaker 1: generational segregation or whatever it is, when you go into 196 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:59,040 Speaker 1: these communities that are deeply homogeneous, the fear of what 197 00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:04,800 Speaker 1: is different, of people who appear to be other creates 198 00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:09,439 Speaker 1: a bias. And in my experience, it's because of what 199 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:13,240 Speaker 1: people don't know that they lean into those biases, and 200 00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:17,720 Speaker 1: when they get to know even just one person, they go, oh, 201 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,400 Speaker 1: none of that stuff I was told or taught is true. 202 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,800 Speaker 1: That's so often and it's like, I think that what 203 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:26,040 Speaker 1: also happens. And I talk about this in my book 204 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,200 Speaker 1: Read This to Get Smarter. I talk about all of 205 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:31,040 Speaker 1: these kind of interpersonally racist things that might be said, 206 00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:34,200 Speaker 1: and sometimes people instead of going, oh, all of my 207 00:11:34,280 --> 00:11:37,360 Speaker 1: preconceived notions are wrong, sometimes they'll say, oh, all my 208 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:40,440 Speaker 1: preconceived notions are correct. But here's an exception to the rule, 209 00:11:40,679 --> 00:11:42,559 Speaker 1: and that's when we hear things like, oh, but you 210 00:11:42,559 --> 00:11:45,600 Speaker 1: don't really seem black to me, or you're like cool 211 00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:49,240 Speaker 1: for a woman, especially like very bro circles, you're not 212 00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:52,800 Speaker 1: like the other girls exactly, or maybe your conception of 213 00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:56,040 Speaker 1: girls is incorrect. It's rarely those things, And so I 214 00:11:56,080 --> 00:12:00,360 Speaker 1: talk about how sometimes it's those biases that we have 215 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,800 Speaker 1: to let go of, and I think what I will 216 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:05,040 Speaker 1: say about these, like, you know, we get called coastal elites, 217 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:08,120 Speaker 1: which is so hilarious to me. And in Louisiana, you 218 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:09,760 Speaker 1: know we're the South coast, you know, we're right on 219 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:14,000 Speaker 1: the Gulf. There's definitely, I think a level of privilege 220 00:12:14,040 --> 00:12:16,880 Speaker 1: that comes with people being able to kind of like 221 00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:18,520 Speaker 1: feel like they knew how you grew up. Like my 222 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:21,600 Speaker 1: school was definitely like high school musical very much because 223 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:25,600 Speaker 1: flash mobs were still a thing in the likes, like 224 00:12:26,040 --> 00:12:27,720 Speaker 1: it was very much like high school musical. Like we 225 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:30,200 Speaker 1: didn't have a sports like we had sports teams about 226 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:31,760 Speaker 1: if you weren't going to the plays, if you weren't 227 00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:33,679 Speaker 1: part of the drama department, then what were you doing? 228 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,240 Speaker 1: And like finding out who was coming out was such 229 00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:39,400 Speaker 1: like the popular thing when you grow up, seeing how 230 00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:42,760 Speaker 1: you grow up on TV because all of the writers 231 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:45,480 Speaker 1: are from where you're from, it's very different. And so 232 00:12:45,559 --> 00:12:47,679 Speaker 1: I think that what I want folks to do is 233 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:50,319 Speaker 1: just be patient with one another. That's what I needed. 234 00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:53,160 Speaker 1: Like moving to Louisiana, I definitely had to like eat 235 00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:56,400 Speaker 1: some humble pie and figure out like, Okay, I've been 236 00:12:56,480 --> 00:12:58,720 Speaker 1: led to believe that everything was better in my hometown, 237 00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:01,240 Speaker 1: but no, there was anti Asian racism, there was anti 238 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:04,839 Speaker 1: black racism. The girl's softball team was not funded the 239 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:07,400 Speaker 1: same way that the baseball team was funded. And looking 240 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:10,040 Speaker 1: at how just because I had this kind of like 241 00:13:10,160 --> 00:13:13,160 Speaker 1: rosy glasses of like naivete, doesn't mean there weren't problems. 242 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:15,440 Speaker 1: And it's not a matter of which problems are worse, 243 00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:18,679 Speaker 1: but a matter of we all have a level of 244 00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:21,600 Speaker 1: privilege over somebody else, and we all have a level 245 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:24,679 Speaker 1: of being more oppressed or farther away from power than 246 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:27,200 Speaker 1: other people, And so how do we use our unique 247 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:30,880 Speaker 1: experiences be patient with ourselves and be transparent with ourselves, 248 00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:33,720 Speaker 1: and you know, come together in a way that makes 249 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:38,080 Speaker 1: everything better for everybody, even if that betterment doesn't necessarily 250 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:41,520 Speaker 1: serve us first, but we'll be what serves just humanity 251 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:43,640 Speaker 1: in a long term. And it's very much like a Mr. 252 00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:45,800 Speaker 1: Rogers way of looking at life. But I feel like 253 00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:48,280 Speaker 1: it works, and I do sometimes roll my eyes when 254 00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:50,800 Speaker 1: people feel like, oh, well, based on how you grew up, 255 00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:53,120 Speaker 1: you must not understand this, like you must not understand 256 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:55,320 Speaker 1: fishing like I love to fish, and I love to 257 00:13:55,360 --> 00:13:57,560 Speaker 1: fish way before I went to L s U. And 258 00:13:57,600 --> 00:13:59,760 Speaker 1: it definitely makes me help me make more friends. But 259 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:05,280 Speaker 1: you know, we can't really base each other's upbringing on 260 00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:08,560 Speaker 1: a script or an assumption that doesn't necessarily fet our 261 00:14:08,559 --> 00:14:15,400 Speaker 1: own story. Oh it's so important and it's something that 262 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:20,480 Speaker 1: I really look at. A good sort of example in 263 00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:24,040 Speaker 1: my mind is the systematic issue of social media, because 264 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:27,480 Speaker 1: it gives you this you know, too D screen and 265 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:32,000 Speaker 1: you're comparing your three D life to it. We're encouraged 266 00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:37,120 Speaker 1: to compare our insides to other people's outsides via our phones, 267 00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:41,160 Speaker 1: and I think it's so important to remember that everywhere 268 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:44,320 Speaker 1: you look there is an inside. And to your point, 269 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:50,800 Speaker 1: which you made so beautifully, that the reality is every 270 00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:54,160 Speaker 1: place has issues. You know, those issues that you brought 271 00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:58,840 Speaker 1: up um that existed beneath the sort of high school 272 00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:03,960 Speaker 1: musical you know, diverse casting. I remember a friend of 273 00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:06,800 Speaker 1: mine UM who works at a studio, saying, yeah, you know, 274 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:10,200 Speaker 1: everyone wants to be the modern Benetton, you know, the 275 00:15:10,320 --> 00:15:12,480 Speaker 1: United Colors of Benetton ads and be like, no, look, 276 00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:14,840 Speaker 1: we did a good job. And it's like, well, okay, 277 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:18,520 Speaker 1: but what's happening behind the scene. So you know, you 278 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:21,120 Speaker 1: may have grown up in a diverse and multi linguistic community, 279 00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:25,320 Speaker 1: but what what was happening underneath? You know, what prejudices 280 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:30,240 Speaker 1: um and systems of harm? Can you identify where you're from? 281 00:15:30,440 --> 00:15:34,400 Speaker 1: Can that make you more empathetic two systems elsewhere? And 282 00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:37,960 Speaker 1: can we each say oh, we have work to do 283 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:41,160 Speaker 1: rather than say you're worse, You're worse, this is bad, 284 00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:45,800 Speaker 1: we have work to do. We could do better. And 285 00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:48,200 Speaker 1: and something that I've been so inspired by, and we've 286 00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:51,720 Speaker 1: had some audience members right into us about this. Some listeners. 287 00:15:52,320 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 1: Dr Ibramax Kendy came on the show and he was 288 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:57,960 Speaker 1: saying that if you will paraphrase, because he's much more 289 00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,880 Speaker 1: eloquent than I than I am, but he was essentially saying, 290 00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:04,040 Speaker 1: you have to take the emotional connection to what racism 291 00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:07,480 Speaker 1: is out and look at racism as a simple fact. 292 00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:12,520 Speaker 1: And I was like, you know how because it's so 293 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,120 Speaker 1: the systems and the abuse in ther and he was 294 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:16,880 Speaker 1: just like, you know, I get it. But if if 295 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:20,080 Speaker 1: you just let it be a thing rather than a judgment, 296 00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:23,280 Speaker 1: you can then look at how to dismantle a racist 297 00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:27,520 Speaker 1: system because you're working on data and experience, and it's 298 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,400 Speaker 1: not about minds worse minds, whereas yours is the word. 299 00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:34,200 Speaker 1: You know, people can take the emotion app And I'm 300 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:39,400 Speaker 1: fascinated by the potential if we could simply look whether 301 00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,840 Speaker 1: you're at school in Louisiana or school in Pasadena and say, 302 00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:46,720 Speaker 1: these are the problems these are these are the the 303 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:49,720 Speaker 1: damage in the system here is based on this kind 304 00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:52,560 Speaker 1: of racism, this kind of gender depression, this kind of 305 00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:59,040 Speaker 1: ablest ideology. What if we just aimed to fix the problems. 306 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:01,880 Speaker 1: If everyone could show up and say, teach me what 307 00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:05,720 Speaker 1: I don't know, how can I help? How might I change? 308 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,520 Speaker 1: Then it might lead us to say, oh, my preconceived 309 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:12,240 Speaker 1: notions were wrong, rather than you're the exception exactly. So 310 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,040 Speaker 1: that's interesting because I like, I think the way that 311 00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:16,240 Speaker 1: I was raised, especially because my parents are both in 312 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:18,879 Speaker 1: mental health, and it was very much the thoughts and 313 00:17:18,880 --> 00:17:21,000 Speaker 1: feelings the way of growing up. And I think there's 314 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,920 Speaker 1: a gender dynamic to where sometimes women are more socialized, 315 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:26,000 Speaker 1: like lead into the feelings is I want people to 316 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:29,119 Speaker 1: step into the emotions of it not necessarily being a 317 00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:31,440 Speaker 1: bad thing, or we can look at it just passionately. 318 00:17:31,480 --> 00:17:33,560 Speaker 1: I think that's what Dr. Kendy is is grasping at 319 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:36,560 Speaker 1: there is like doing it this kind of like internal 320 00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:39,760 Speaker 1: review and being really transparent, honest with yourself. But when 321 00:17:39,800 --> 00:17:45,159 Speaker 1: we have things like preconceived notions, biases, you know, assumption stereotypes, 322 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:48,200 Speaker 1: reflecting on what we feel in those moments, that kind 323 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:50,920 Speaker 1: of fear like even you know, the microaggression that often 324 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:54,159 Speaker 1: happens when there's a man who walks past and you 325 00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:56,680 Speaker 1: speed up. And sometimes it's because of valid fears because 326 00:17:56,720 --> 00:17:59,120 Speaker 1: the patriarchy is out here and ripe culture is real. 327 00:17:59,680 --> 00:18:01,879 Speaker 1: But looking at that feeling and what that connects to, 328 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:05,520 Speaker 1: because I think sometimes we end up gaslighting ourselves into 329 00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:09,920 Speaker 1: thinking that these feelings we have are our fault, and 330 00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:11,959 Speaker 1: it's not necessarily a matter of fault. To me, it's 331 00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:14,760 Speaker 1: a matter of responsibility. A lot of us were socialized 332 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:16,760 Speaker 1: with a lot of nonsense. I mean, can I cuss 333 00:18:16,760 --> 00:18:19,560 Speaker 1: on the show like it was just like total bullshit, 334 00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,280 Speaker 1: and like the fact is that we have all this 335 00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:25,360 Speaker 1: racist bullshit. And I think the conversation has become recently 336 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:28,159 Speaker 1: whose fault is this bullshit? Instead of it being whose 337 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:31,240 Speaker 1: responsibility is this bullshit? And so if we get to 338 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:34,720 Speaker 1: a matter of responsibility, I really think the whole conversation 339 00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:37,640 Speaker 1: of discomfort when it comes to interrogating privilege, those things 340 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:40,960 Speaker 1: are important because it makes us better understand what the 341 00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:44,080 Speaker 1: reluctance is. I really don't feel that the reluctance it 342 00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:45,920 Speaker 1: comes from people being like, well, I don't give a 343 00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:48,280 Speaker 1: ship what other people are going through. I'm fine. I 344 00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:49,719 Speaker 1: think there are some people like that, but I think 345 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:52,080 Speaker 1: there are more people who are like I am so 346 00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:56,639 Speaker 1: immobilized by apprehension and this fear of not wanting to 347 00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:58,360 Speaker 1: do the wrong thing that I don't even know where 348 00:18:58,400 --> 00:18:59,880 Speaker 1: to start. And so what I want people to do 349 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:02,280 Speaker 1: is to tap into that and to look at themselves 350 00:19:02,359 --> 00:19:05,159 Speaker 1: first and to say, Okay, who am I? And not 351 00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,840 Speaker 1: only who am I? But who do I understand myself 352 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,760 Speaker 1: to be? And who do others understand myself to be 353 00:19:11,119 --> 00:19:13,320 Speaker 1: and one of those things not match up. Because when 354 00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:15,359 Speaker 1: those things don't match up, it is sometimes because of 355 00:19:15,359 --> 00:19:17,440 Speaker 1: where we came from or because of what we look like, 356 00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:21,639 Speaker 1: and those things aren't our fault or our responsibility. But 357 00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:24,200 Speaker 1: what is our responsibility is when we look at other 358 00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:27,480 Speaker 1: people and we say, I don't understand that person's gender identity. 359 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:31,600 Speaker 1: That's not that person's responsibility. That's our responsibility to work through, 360 00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:34,000 Speaker 1: so it doesn't negatively affect how we interact with them 361 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:39,119 Speaker 1: or others. Yes, yes, And I think for me, the 362 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,440 Speaker 1: finding this kind of balance that you're talking about has 363 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:45,080 Speaker 1: been such work for me because I am all emotion, 364 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:48,600 Speaker 1: all feeling. If you're in pain, I'm in pain. What's 365 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:52,040 Speaker 1: happening in your community might as well be happening to mine. 366 00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:57,440 Speaker 1: It's it's hard for me to disentangle sometimes, and I've 367 00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:03,960 Speaker 1: learned that what is so clearly unjust that I can 368 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:07,000 Speaker 1: see some people, based on where they come from, what 369 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:11,120 Speaker 1: they've experienced, what they haven't experienced, don't have the same reaction. 370 00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:14,520 Speaker 1: And it's been really helpful for me to learn to 371 00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:20,280 Speaker 1: pressure test my emotional response to something by leaning into 372 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:23,320 Speaker 1: the data and saying Okay, if I just make it math, 373 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,000 Speaker 1: if I take the feeling out of it, what might 374 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:31,080 Speaker 1: I see that I could then explain differently from my 375 00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:34,720 Speaker 1: unique experience. And we each have those, and it's I 376 00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:36,919 Speaker 1: don't know. It's just been so fascinating to me to 377 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:42,440 Speaker 1: begin learning how other people do it and and gleaning 378 00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:47,399 Speaker 1: some of those tools, because to your point, we don't 379 00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:52,080 Speaker 1: all have the same instinctual ways of communicating or seeing 380 00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:57,080 Speaker 1: or feeling. And I think that for me, being able 381 00:20:57,160 --> 00:21:03,000 Speaker 1: to pull in more scientific information to meet my feelings 382 00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:08,200 Speaker 1: has given me an assist in how to meet and 383 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:12,480 Speaker 1: communicate with people. And I find it helpful as a 384 00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:18,479 Speaker 1: deeply sensitive person. And yeah, I just I think I 385 00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:21,760 Speaker 1: think that it can sometimes be the key to unlocking 386 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:26,000 Speaker 1: that thing you speak of, which is the difference between 387 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:30,240 Speaker 1: saying I don't understand something and I need help versus, oh, 388 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:35,119 Speaker 1: I'm carrying a prejudice or a level of confusion. And 389 00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:38,720 Speaker 1: it's no one else's responsibility to do that emotional labor 390 00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:40,679 Speaker 1: for me. I have to do it myself. And it's 391 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:43,720 Speaker 1: so empowering too, because once you usually an active step 392 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:46,720 Speaker 1: in it, that's not something that is very easy to 393 00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:49,159 Speaker 1: turn off, like when you start watching TV shows. It's real. 394 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:50,919 Speaker 1: I really don't recommend move people let go back and 395 00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:53,480 Speaker 1: watch their favorite movie or TV show from childhood, because 396 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:55,480 Speaker 1: as soon as they do, look like this is problematic. 397 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:57,159 Speaker 1: I don't know why children are allowed to watch this. 398 00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:59,119 Speaker 1: What the heck is going on with that? But it 399 00:21:59,119 --> 00:22:02,440 Speaker 1: starts with so many kids movies are terrifying. Oh yeah, 400 00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:04,399 Speaker 1: and like you don't want to step back into that. 401 00:22:04,440 --> 00:22:06,080 Speaker 1: But once you see it, you can't un see it. 402 00:22:06,119 --> 00:22:08,639 Speaker 1: And once you make it an active process, it's a 403 00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:11,600 Speaker 1: lot more activating where you can start going, Okay, what 404 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,400 Speaker 1: is the work that we have to do, like you're 405 00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,640 Speaker 1: just saying and looking at it not as a matter 406 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:19,520 Speaker 1: of fault and burden, but responsibility and activation so that 407 00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:22,080 Speaker 1: we can't take on this work and then become really excited. 408 00:22:22,119 --> 00:22:24,840 Speaker 1: But I mean, the point you're getting to is well 409 00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:28,840 Speaker 1: about how we all do it differently and process things differently. 410 00:22:29,040 --> 00:22:31,879 Speaker 1: It's just the essential key point. How did you remember 411 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,680 Speaker 1: mitosis for your biology tests? When it comes down to that, 412 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,520 Speaker 1: I made up like a song for it. Some other 413 00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:39,919 Speaker 1: people just get it immediately. So when it comes to 414 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,280 Speaker 1: something like that that we don't often interact with unless 415 00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:44,520 Speaker 1: you're like a scientist, which is cool when it comes 416 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:46,360 Speaker 1: to something that we interact with on a daily basis, 417 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:48,399 Speaker 1: which are the systems of oppression. The way that you 418 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,800 Speaker 1: understand it might be totally different from how I understand it, 419 00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,520 Speaker 1: but whatever it takes to get in the door, I'm 420 00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,399 Speaker 1: happy that we're here. Maybe we should have gotten here 421 00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:57,360 Speaker 1: a little bit sooner, but the fact is that we're here. 422 00:22:57,359 --> 00:22:59,280 Speaker 1: Now what do we do about it? And that's that 423 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:02,760 Speaker 1: activation in And I also remind people that it's not 424 00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:06,040 Speaker 1: a matter of doing this work because it's trendy or popular, 425 00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:09,080 Speaker 1: but because it is a better it's a better way 426 00:23:09,119 --> 00:23:12,040 Speaker 1: to live. I truly feel because I think that a 427 00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:14,280 Speaker 1: lot of folks reflect on who they were prior to 428 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:18,520 Speaker 1: June when there was this you know, quote unquote racial awakening, 429 00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,199 Speaker 1: and they look at themselves now and they kind of 430 00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:22,879 Speaker 1: cringe at things they may have said in the past. 431 00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:25,040 Speaker 1: And of course now we have like Instagram reminding us 432 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:26,560 Speaker 1: who we were two years ago, so we can really 433 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:31,600 Speaker 1: step into that cringe, but being happy that they have grown, 434 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:36,120 Speaker 1: not because of what sparked that growth, because tragedies shouldn't 435 00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:38,480 Speaker 1: have to happen for growth to occur. But what do 436 00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:40,760 Speaker 1: we do with the facts of a situation, and how 437 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,160 Speaker 1: do we come out of it, how do we cope, 438 00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:44,280 Speaker 1: how do we grow, how do we change? And I 439 00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:46,280 Speaker 1: think even with something like a global pandemic, there have 440 00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:48,879 Speaker 1: been a lot of people who had to sit down 441 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:50,960 Speaker 1: and figure out what do I do with myself? And 442 00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:53,119 Speaker 1: these moments of quiet, A lot of people decided to 443 00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:55,320 Speaker 1: go to therapy. It's okay that I'm crying. I'm going 444 00:23:55,359 --> 00:23:58,320 Speaker 1: to deal with this trauma. I'm going to improve these things. 445 00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:02,680 Speaker 1: And what her circumstance got us into that place, That's 446 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:04,199 Speaker 1: not what we need to focus on. It's what we 447 00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:07,840 Speaker 1: do with those circumstances. And I just get really excited 448 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:10,240 Speaker 1: about all of it because I have friends who grew 449 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:13,040 Speaker 1: up extremely privileged or believed that being color blind to 450 00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:16,400 Speaker 1: racism was a solution, which it's not. You can't really 451 00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:18,240 Speaker 1: ignore something and hope it gets better unless it's like 452 00:24:18,240 --> 00:24:20,320 Speaker 1: a tiny pimple on your face, like systems of oppression 453 00:24:20,320 --> 00:24:22,520 Speaker 1: don't work that way. But I see those folks sending 454 00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,320 Speaker 1: me videos of their kids being excited to go to 455 00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:28,240 Speaker 1: Black Lives Matter rallies or have tough conversations or be 456 00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,840 Speaker 1: like mommy, why are all your friends white like, it's 457 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,560 Speaker 1: so exciting to me that process even happening, and that 458 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,520 Speaker 1: parents are in a position to be like, honey, that 459 00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:38,679 Speaker 1: is a question that mommy needs to ask yourself. What 460 00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:41,080 Speaker 1: do we do about it? Versus getting something to run 461 00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:44,359 Speaker 1: away from? And I just think that it's a betterment 462 00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:46,800 Speaker 1: that a lot of folks are realizing there's so much 463 00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:49,720 Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm not afraid of that, but I 464 00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:54,720 Speaker 1: am excited by it because I have more work to do. Yeah, 465 00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:58,760 Speaker 1: And that if we can, if we can encourage people 466 00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:02,440 Speaker 1: to take the sort of of you know, never enough 467 00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,399 Speaker 1: feelings of failing that come from living in a deeply 468 00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:10,800 Speaker 1: you know, hierarchical and capitalist society, and and take those 469 00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:15,480 Speaker 1: out of personal identity and say it's okay that I 470 00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,720 Speaker 1: don't know everything. It's okay that I haven't had every experience. 471 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:21,920 Speaker 1: How am I going to show up differently today? How 472 00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:25,920 Speaker 1: am I going to ask those questions today? Um? Yes, 473 00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,520 Speaker 1: we should have gotten here sooner, obviously, but here we are, 474 00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:31,600 Speaker 1: So what are we going to do from today forward? 475 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,879 Speaker 1: And And it's interesting because I think about some of 476 00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:38,040 Speaker 1: the things you are talking about, you know, in these 477 00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:41,320 Speaker 1: moments and happening inside of families and and what is 478 00:25:41,359 --> 00:25:44,560 Speaker 1: opening up because of the Internet, because of the transparency 479 00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:47,240 Speaker 1: we all have and the capabilities we have to talk 480 00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:49,439 Speaker 1: to each other and see each other and and really 481 00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:53,480 Speaker 1: see systems that nobody wanted to put on the news, 482 00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:57,760 Speaker 1: but now Instagram is the news. Um, I'm very curious. 483 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:01,720 Speaker 1: It doesn't seem accidental to me that so many things 484 00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,600 Speaker 1: lined up to put you in the world to do 485 00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:07,560 Speaker 1: all of this work. You know, you speak about your family, 486 00:26:07,720 --> 00:26:09,639 Speaker 1: you speak about the community you were raised in, what 487 00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:12,919 Speaker 1: you experienced with your sister. I think about the fact 488 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:16,520 Speaker 1: that you were born only a year after the acquittal 489 00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:19,920 Speaker 1: of the police officers involved in the Rodney King assault 490 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:26,639 Speaker 1: and riots. And when you speak on advocacy for your sister, 491 00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:29,160 Speaker 1: when you speak on advocacy for community, when you talk 492 00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:33,760 Speaker 1: about teaching young people as a black, queer Muslim woman, 493 00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 1: do you see from this moment of leadership in your life? 494 00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:46,880 Speaker 1: Do you see through lines to understanding these systems were 495 00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:51,280 Speaker 1: referring to to understanding systems of harm and police brutality 496 00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:53,439 Speaker 1: and things as you were growing up or was that 497 00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:58,520 Speaker 1: something that moving to Louisiana and being in a completely 498 00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:05,000 Speaker 1: different experience for the first time in your young life. 499 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:06,600 Speaker 1: Where do you where do you think it clicked on 500 00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:09,760 Speaker 1: for you looking back? I think that when I look 501 00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:11,640 Speaker 1: back and I tell like stories about how I grew 502 00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:15,720 Speaker 1: up to my friends, it's so linear, like I am exactly, 503 00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:17,640 Speaker 1: I'm doing exactly what I was meant to be doing, 504 00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,679 Speaker 1: the fact that I would often volunteer myself to give 505 00:27:20,720 --> 00:27:24,120 Speaker 1: a presentation on the Tuskegee Airmen or like the civil 506 00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:26,960 Speaker 1: Rights movement, or the fact that there's actually a video 507 00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,800 Speaker 1: me on my YouTube channel from like I think it's 508 00:27:29,800 --> 00:27:32,240 Speaker 1: like two thousand and six where I'm a little wee 509 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:34,760 Speaker 1: baby and I have my little headband on, and I'm 510 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:38,160 Speaker 1: giving my interview in my living room with my friend Katie, 511 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,159 Speaker 1: and we're interviewing Dr Terrence Roberts, who was one of 512 00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:45,399 Speaker 1: the nine students that volunteered to integrate schools in Little Rock, Arkansas. 513 00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:48,160 Speaker 1: And he came over, you know, in his sweat pants, 514 00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:50,760 Speaker 1: like getting ready to for us to interview him. And 515 00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:53,160 Speaker 1: I see moments in that interview and I love showing 516 00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:55,320 Speaker 1: it to the young people I'm working with because they 517 00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,880 Speaker 1: are around that same age that I was. And there's 518 00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,840 Speaker 1: this point where I remember having these no cards but 519 00:28:00,920 --> 00:28:03,240 Speaker 1: there's one question I asked him that was a follow up, 520 00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:06,159 Speaker 1: and that's like, that's great journalistic skills. And I'm like, 521 00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:08,720 Speaker 1: you know, twelve or something. Those are the things where 522 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:11,360 Speaker 1: I'm like really excited about it. But I also think 523 00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:13,639 Speaker 1: about what I do today, which is connect with so 524 00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:17,800 Speaker 1: many diverse people to explain things in these really tangible ways. 525 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:19,840 Speaker 1: Like I did a lesson on how to apologize. I 526 00:28:19,840 --> 00:28:21,919 Speaker 1: don't think that a lot of us might raise our 527 00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:24,000 Speaker 1: hands and go, I need to learn how to apologize better. 528 00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:25,960 Speaker 1: But once we see that lesson, we might go, oh, 529 00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:27,840 Speaker 1: those are some tips and tricks that I actually need 530 00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:31,600 Speaker 1: to incorporate in my life. It's kind of this life 531 00:28:31,600 --> 00:28:34,280 Speaker 1: I've had figuring out how to get people to a 532 00:28:34,320 --> 00:28:36,960 Speaker 1: place where I know they can be, but maybe they're 533 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:40,160 Speaker 1: not in a place of self understanding that they need 534 00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:42,920 Speaker 1: to get there, And how do I cross that bridge 535 00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:46,400 Speaker 1: in a way that isn't shaming people or judging people, 536 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:49,720 Speaker 1: but just really kind of activating and exciting people. And 537 00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:52,680 Speaker 1: there's other aspects, like I was definitely a little bit 538 00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:55,440 Speaker 1: tokenized growing up as one of the few black students 539 00:28:55,520 --> 00:28:59,840 Speaker 1: in the school district period, and I remember that there 540 00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:02,560 Speaker 1: were points when it was very clear that Obama was 541 00:29:02,560 --> 00:29:04,920 Speaker 1: going to become president. Obama at least become the candidate, 542 00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,440 Speaker 1: you know, and then eventually president. And I would be 543 00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,560 Speaker 1: waiting for my mom at school and I remember one 544 00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,400 Speaker 1: of the parents, one of the white parents, came out 545 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:13,040 Speaker 1: of the car and was like, Hey, Blair, I have 546 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,920 Speaker 1: a question for you. So what does young black America 547 00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:20,200 Speaker 1: think about Canada? Obama and I had answers because I 548 00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 1: anticipated I would be asked because I grew up with 549 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:27,040 Speaker 1: such a belief in like being prepared. I mean my dad, 550 00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:29,719 Speaker 1: the way that he would teach us about preparedness. He 551 00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:31,920 Speaker 1: has this story about when he went to Kenya. He 552 00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:34,640 Speaker 1: did operations Crossroads Africa in the seventies. He was a 553 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:37,840 Speaker 1: conscientious objector to the war in Vietnam, and he talks 554 00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:40,680 Speaker 1: about how everybody wanted to like have fun the first 555 00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:42,560 Speaker 1: day of the trip, and my dad was like, no, 556 00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:45,040 Speaker 1: I'm gonna go get some wood and I'm going to 557 00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:48,240 Speaker 1: build myself a bed that slightly off the ground because 558 00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:49,960 Speaker 1: there are weevils in the dirt and I want to 559 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:52,560 Speaker 1: protect myself. And everybody was like, oh, do Walt, You're 560 00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:55,160 Speaker 1: so boring, And he was like, I don't care about 561 00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:57,480 Speaker 1: being boring. I care about being prepared. And he would 562 00:29:57,480 --> 00:29:59,280 Speaker 1: tell the story like if you forgot your homework at 563 00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:01,960 Speaker 1: home and didn't bring into school. But it really imprinted 564 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:04,600 Speaker 1: on me that, no, you sometimes have to do the 565 00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:07,320 Speaker 1: unpopular thing or the lonely thing in order to be 566 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,040 Speaker 1: prepared and equip yourself. Of course, for a twelve year 567 00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:13,080 Speaker 1: old Blair, super stressful way to grow up, and I 568 00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:17,240 Speaker 1: definitely have generalized anxiety to storder like and it's interesting 569 00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:19,480 Speaker 1: to look at all the pieces and just know that 570 00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:21,160 Speaker 1: sometimes I was put in the position of being the 571 00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:25,600 Speaker 1: spokesperson for all black people, and that's really unfair and 572 00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:28,800 Speaker 1: I don't want my kids to have to go through that. Simultaneously, 573 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,400 Speaker 1: I have been so well equipped to do exactly what 574 00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:34,440 Speaker 1: I'm doing today. And I think that the difference between 575 00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:37,400 Speaker 1: being in Pastina and then going to Louisiana was that 576 00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:40,080 Speaker 1: I had this tool kit from growing up. I had 577 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:41,959 Speaker 1: a vision of what things could be. When I came 578 00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:43,920 Speaker 1: out to my parents and my brother came out to 579 00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:46,320 Speaker 1: my parents, it wasn't like, oh, we need to go 580 00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:48,840 Speaker 1: to therapy about this. It was like, amazing, I'm so 581 00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:51,600 Speaker 1: glad you've realized this. About yourself. Thank you so much 582 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:53,760 Speaker 1: for letling us in. And it was a vision of 583 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:55,760 Speaker 1: how life could be. But then I went to school 584 00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:57,920 Speaker 1: in Louisiana and I had friends who were telling me 585 00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:00,160 Speaker 1: that their parents put them in conversion therapist who as 586 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,880 Speaker 1: it came out, and I saw what life could be 587 00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:06,280 Speaker 1: and should be growing up, and then I was transported 588 00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:08,760 Speaker 1: by choice. I went to Louisiana State University and saw 589 00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:11,240 Speaker 1: how life is for a lot of people, and it 590 00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:14,440 Speaker 1: made me realize, I have been so blessed, and it's 591 00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:16,960 Speaker 1: not that I have been blessed or that I'm fortunate, 592 00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:19,880 Speaker 1: it's that I've grown up how it should be, and 593 00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,320 Speaker 1: so how do I create systems for other people? And 594 00:31:22,440 --> 00:31:25,640 Speaker 1: in that moment, my response was to put my classes 595 00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:28,560 Speaker 1: on Tuesday and Thursday, so that Monday, Wednesday, Friday I 596 00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:30,840 Speaker 1: could be doing trainings. I could do advocacy. I could 597 00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:33,000 Speaker 1: go to the Capitol building, which was right in the 598 00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:36,720 Speaker 1: city of Bouton Rouge and start doing trainings on you know, 599 00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:41,160 Speaker 1: civil disobedience and consent. And I think that it was 600 00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:43,520 Speaker 1: like I had all the skills and it was going 601 00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:46,080 Speaker 1: to Louisiana that activated me and also gave me a 602 00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:50,320 Speaker 1: sense that it's not as rosie everywhere else, but it 603 00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,680 Speaker 1: could be. And I'm glad that I had that that 604 00:31:52,720 --> 00:31:55,520 Speaker 1: growth and understanding growing up that no, you should be 605 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:58,000 Speaker 1: able to come out and be accepted period. But a 606 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,160 Speaker 1: lot of people don't experience that, And so how do 607 00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:03,840 Speaker 1: we use education to cross that bridge? I am endlessly 608 00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:08,720 Speaker 1: excited when people talk about not just envisioning, but actually 609 00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:13,720 Speaker 1: experiencing the world as it could be at its best, 610 00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:19,040 Speaker 1: and then committing to assisting in the creation of that world, 611 00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,880 Speaker 1: of that kind of a future. And I know it 612 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:25,040 Speaker 1: strikes me, and I'm sure strikes plenty of people who 613 00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:28,280 Speaker 1: are listening to us have this conversation. You talking about 614 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:32,640 Speaker 1: being a college student and saying, I'm gonna reserve three 615 00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:36,080 Speaker 1: days a week to run trainings on sevil disobedience to 616 00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:41,320 Speaker 1: to teach to gather people. How does a young woman 617 00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:45,760 Speaker 1: do that? How? How does how do you? As your 618 00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:49,520 Speaker 1: college self? I feel confident enough to say, oh, I 619 00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:52,520 Speaker 1: know how to do this? Where does that begin? Where 620 00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:55,400 Speaker 1: you were? You? Nervous? I have anxiety just thinking about it. 621 00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:57,640 Speaker 1: I think a big part of it is that I 622 00:32:57,680 --> 00:33:03,000 Speaker 1: grew up idolizing the civil rights movement and definitely was 623 00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:05,440 Speaker 1: doing a little bit of self fulfilling prophecy when it 624 00:33:05,520 --> 00:33:09,680 Speaker 1: came to that idolization. I expected college to be the 625 00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:11,960 Speaker 1: place where you went and had protests where there were 626 00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:14,440 Speaker 1: sit ins where you were changing yourself to the dean's 627 00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:16,800 Speaker 1: office so that things changed, which we never did. Um, 628 00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:19,280 Speaker 1: but I was always prepared to do it. You were ready. Yeah. 629 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:21,880 Speaker 1: It was also an environment where, like my parents paid 630 00:33:21,920 --> 00:33:25,240 Speaker 1: for my school and we were able to get loans 631 00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:27,920 Speaker 1: and stuff. So I wasn't constantly in this position that 632 00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:31,040 Speaker 1: a lot of my peers were of needing to not 633 00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:35,160 Speaker 1: upset school administration, whether that was in a material sense 634 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:38,600 Speaker 1: or like a belief sense and lose their scholarship or 635 00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:41,880 Speaker 1: get sent home, or didn't have parents who would fly 636 00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:44,640 Speaker 1: down to Louisiana and get you a lawyer and speak 637 00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:46,120 Speaker 1: to the double A c. P. If you got into 638 00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:48,120 Speaker 1: any type of racially based trouble, because that was my 639 00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:50,440 Speaker 1: parents all the time. Like my parents were like if 640 00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:52,800 Speaker 1: anybody says, especially because we were the only black kids 641 00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:56,440 Speaker 1: in many cases growing up, my parents were so present 642 00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:58,640 Speaker 1: and ready to go, Like if we weren't getting all 643 00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:00,440 Speaker 1: the things that we needed, my parents were like, let's 644 00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:03,280 Speaker 1: speak to the manager immediately that very much that energy. 645 00:34:03,520 --> 00:34:05,520 Speaker 1: So I came with that. I also came with the 646 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:08,439 Speaker 1: understanding of seeing what had been done growing up down 647 00:34:08,440 --> 00:34:11,800 Speaker 1: the street from Dr Roberts, from Little Rock nine definitely 648 00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:13,840 Speaker 1: gave me this perception. I remember he told me he 649 00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:16,560 Speaker 1: was fifteen when he did that. I interviewed him when 650 00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:18,360 Speaker 1: I was like twelve or thirteen, and I was like, Wow, 651 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:20,640 Speaker 1: that's only a couple of years from now. What am 652 00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:22,360 Speaker 1: I doing to be in the history book. So it 653 00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:25,719 Speaker 1: was kind of like this, not competitiveness in like a 654 00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:28,680 Speaker 1: toxic way, but very much like this where my contributions 655 00:34:28,719 --> 00:34:30,960 Speaker 1: coming in. So when I got to college and I 656 00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:34,759 Speaker 1: was like, Okay, the activism arena here, it exists. I 657 00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:36,920 Speaker 1: knew that in Baton News there with the bus boycotts 658 00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:39,960 Speaker 1: there that had preceded the ones with Dr King in Alabama, 659 00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:42,600 Speaker 1: and I knew that we could make this difference. But 660 00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:44,959 Speaker 1: there was also a lack of understanding I had about 661 00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,880 Speaker 1: all the trauma people had gone with policing. Growing up 662 00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:51,200 Speaker 1: in Louisiana, I had friends who who had a cousin 663 00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:54,960 Speaker 1: who disappeared, and I also had that in Los Angeles. 664 00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:57,440 Speaker 1: But I also grew up in San Marino, where my 665 00:34:57,480 --> 00:35:00,000 Speaker 1: mom went to high school with one of the police office. 666 00:35:00,040 --> 00:35:02,759 Speaker 1: There's who was the only black woman police officer at 667 00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:05,640 Speaker 1: the p D. And so when you hung up the 668 00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:08,160 Speaker 1: phone in San Marino, the police are already there and 669 00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:10,680 Speaker 1: they were happy to help. Like it was a very 670 00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:13,720 Speaker 1: different dynamic than constantly being harassed on your way to school. 671 00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:15,840 Speaker 1: And so I had that disconnect. And so when it 672 00:35:15,880 --> 00:35:19,920 Speaker 1: came time to organize a vigil, we did a vigil um. 673 00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:22,120 Speaker 1: When we found out that the police officer that killed 674 00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:25,040 Speaker 1: Mike Brown wouldn't be, you know, indicted, or that he 675 00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:27,879 Speaker 1: had been acquitted, I don't I don't recall the had 676 00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:29,600 Speaker 1: taken place, but we wanted to do a vigil to 677 00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:32,200 Speaker 1: give people a place to mourn, and my friends were 678 00:35:32,200 --> 00:35:35,080 Speaker 1: afraid to do that, and I was like, there's definitely 679 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:37,960 Speaker 1: so much that I'm not aware of that my friends 680 00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:42,520 Speaker 1: feel afraid to have to come together with a permit 681 00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:45,960 Speaker 1: on campus with candles to mourn and do a spoken 682 00:35:46,040 --> 00:35:49,600 Speaker 1: word poetry night. I need to take so many steps back. 683 00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:51,800 Speaker 1: I need to let go that dream of chaining ourselves 684 00:35:51,800 --> 00:35:55,400 Speaker 1: to the dean's office and figure out how I cannot 685 00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:57,680 Speaker 1: do that thing that people think that folks from the 686 00:35:57,680 --> 00:35:59,520 Speaker 1: West Coast and the East Coast do, which is think 687 00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:01,439 Speaker 1: that we know everything and we come in and try 688 00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:03,719 Speaker 1: to solve problems that we aren't even familiar with all 689 00:36:03,760 --> 00:36:06,640 Speaker 1: the way. And I think I did that well. I 690 00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:08,560 Speaker 1: of course I would like to think I did it well, 691 00:36:08,560 --> 00:36:09,880 Speaker 1: but I think I had a lot to learn in 692 00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:13,240 Speaker 1: terms of what's the status quo here, and not only 693 00:36:13,719 --> 00:36:16,120 Speaker 1: feeling like, oh, I could fix everything, but that I'm 694 00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:18,319 Speaker 1: going to do my damnedest to fix it, but that 695 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,759 Speaker 1: also I need to be collaborative. And I so got 696 00:36:20,760 --> 00:36:22,640 Speaker 1: burnt out, like I would always have talked with my 697 00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:24,560 Speaker 1: mom should be like, don't get burnt out, blare, and 698 00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:26,640 Speaker 1: I didn't. It was so abstract to me. I was like, 699 00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:30,480 Speaker 1: what is burnout? But for me, it looked like sleeping 700 00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:33,400 Speaker 1: through the protest that I organized because I was so exhausted, 701 00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:36,600 Speaker 1: or not taking care of myself or eating and drinking 702 00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:39,360 Speaker 1: enough water because I was feeling like, if I go 703 00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:42,120 Speaker 1: to this party or if I do anything nice for myself, 704 00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:44,759 Speaker 1: I'm taking money away from something I could donate, something 705 00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:49,000 Speaker 1: I could do better. And it wasn't sustainable whatsoever. And 706 00:36:49,040 --> 00:36:54,800 Speaker 1: so it was kind of like such an urgency within 707 00:36:54,920 --> 00:36:57,360 Speaker 1: my heart and soul. If I don't do this, it 708 00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:01,480 Speaker 1: won't happen. And that's a terrible way to organize, in 709 00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:03,560 Speaker 1: a great way to get burnt out. And what I 710 00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:05,200 Speaker 1: had to instead do, which I feel like I was 711 00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:08,160 Speaker 1: starting to accomplish as I left Louisiana UM in my 712 00:37:08,239 --> 00:37:11,040 Speaker 1: last year of school, which was figure out who I 713 00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:13,439 Speaker 1: could build in coalition with. But there were some things 714 00:37:13,440 --> 00:37:17,400 Speaker 1: that I definitely tried to burden or shoulder myself, like 715 00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:21,000 Speaker 1: I tried to protect people from things like instead of 716 00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:24,440 Speaker 1: being in community when we basically were doing these meetups 717 00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:28,600 Speaker 1: on campus and we would have blackout Wednesday. It was 718 00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:31,040 Speaker 1: co organized by my friend Kristin White and myself and 719 00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:33,959 Speaker 1: some other folks, and we would have press sometimes coming. 720 00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:37,000 Speaker 1: We had a lot of accomplishments, but I was the 721 00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:39,000 Speaker 1: one whose name was on paperwork, so I was the 722 00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:42,080 Speaker 1: one getting threats, but I wasn't sharing that that was happening. 723 00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:45,440 Speaker 1: I was just trying to insulate people. And so not 724 00:37:45,560 --> 00:37:47,520 Speaker 1: only was I burnt out and feeling like I had 725 00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:50,160 Speaker 1: to be the superwoman, but I was also kind of 726 00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:52,160 Speaker 1: trying to shelter other folks cause I knew that they 727 00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:54,719 Speaker 1: were afraid of these things, and I felt like if 728 00:37:54,760 --> 00:37:57,360 Speaker 1: I had shared that was the reality, then all the 729 00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:00,359 Speaker 1: progress we made would fall back, and so we ended 730 00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:02,239 Speaker 1: up not doing those anymore. And there was a time 731 00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:05,799 Speaker 1: where it kind of coincided with these two militiamen, self 732 00:38:05,840 --> 00:38:09,560 Speaker 1: appointed militiamen who came to campus with guns, and it 733 00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:13,279 Speaker 1: was kind of like a very diffused situation, but in 734 00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:14,799 Speaker 1: my heart, I was like, those could have been the 735 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:17,360 Speaker 1: people who were giving me threats. And so it definitely 736 00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:20,480 Speaker 1: affected me further on in my organizing career to the 737 00:38:20,480 --> 00:38:24,480 Speaker 1: point where I'm a retired organizer. Now I can't do 738 00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:26,479 Speaker 1: that anymore because it's just not good for my mental health. 739 00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:28,400 Speaker 1: And so it was kind of like a candle that 740 00:38:28,400 --> 00:38:32,400 Speaker 1: burns quickly but burns out. And fortunately my new candles 741 00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,200 Speaker 1: to be like a writer and educator and historian. But 742 00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:39,279 Speaker 1: I went in with such a sense of this has 743 00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:41,680 Speaker 1: to be done that I didn't even have time to 744 00:38:41,719 --> 00:38:45,279 Speaker 1: look at what might happen. And I wasn't listening to 745 00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:47,560 Speaker 1: people in my family, like my uncle Vernon, who was 746 00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:50,520 Speaker 1: a black panther who was constantly telling me be careful, 747 00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:53,239 Speaker 1: watch your back. I was like, whatever, Uncle Vernon things 748 00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:56,560 Speaker 1: need to change. But he had gone through something that 749 00:38:56,640 --> 00:39:00,920 Speaker 1: I hadn't even believed was a possibility. So if I 750 00:39:00,960 --> 00:39:02,680 Speaker 1: could do it all again, I would be more patient, 751 00:39:03,160 --> 00:39:05,640 Speaker 1: I would listen more. And that's really what I tried 752 00:39:05,719 --> 00:39:08,080 Speaker 1: to talk to young people who are doing this work now, 753 00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:11,520 Speaker 1: is to take your time until really heed the warnings 754 00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:14,680 Speaker 1: and the environment that people are going into. But the 755 00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:16,600 Speaker 1: biggest part of it was that I was trying to 756 00:39:16,760 --> 00:39:20,239 Speaker 1: actualize a civil rights movement moment, and it was a 757 00:39:20,239 --> 00:39:22,640 Speaker 1: self fulfilling prophecy. But I didn't even think about how 758 00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:25,839 Speaker 1: many activists don't talk about their work anymore because they're 759 00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:29,960 Speaker 1: so exhausted. But I definitely understand it now. The candle 760 00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:33,720 Speaker 1: that burns out quickly really resonates with me. I think, 761 00:39:34,560 --> 00:39:38,960 Speaker 1: especially in a deeply motivated youth, we think we're going 762 00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,520 Speaker 1: to be the ones to change it. You know, talking 763 00:39:41,560 --> 00:39:46,640 Speaker 1: to my parents about attending civil rights protests and Vietnam protests, 764 00:39:46,680 --> 00:39:50,520 Speaker 1: and and you know, similarly, my dad talking about immigrating 765 00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:53,319 Speaker 1: to the US, and and in a way, because he 766 00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:55,400 Speaker 1: knew he was safe from the draft, he could go 767 00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:58,799 Speaker 1: and step up and say things that other friends who 768 00:39:58,880 --> 00:40:02,400 Speaker 1: were from here fell like they couldn't. So. Hearing you 769 00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:06,160 Speaker 1: talk about understanding ways in which you felt protected and 770 00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:09,759 Speaker 1: privileged by your own circumstance um and also put your 771 00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:11,719 Speaker 1: foot so hard on the gas, I'm like, yep, I've 772 00:40:11,719 --> 00:40:14,399 Speaker 1: talked to my parents about that. I definitely did that, 773 00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:17,640 Speaker 1: you know, as a young as a young woman really 774 00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:20,440 Speaker 1: jumping into the fray. It was like, I'm going to 775 00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:23,759 Speaker 1: use the privilege of this platform or everything at my disposal, 776 00:40:24,440 --> 00:40:30,000 Speaker 1: and yeah, when the threats start coming, nobody really prepares 777 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:33,160 Speaker 1: you for that. And like my the way my parents 778 00:40:33,239 --> 00:40:35,719 Speaker 1: have reacted to me getting threats every single time is 779 00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:38,919 Speaker 1: probably the healthiest way, but not the most helpful way, 780 00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:40,440 Speaker 1: where they're like, well, that's how you know you're doing 781 00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:42,319 Speaker 1: something right when people are trying to get you, and 782 00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:45,720 Speaker 1: it's like, okay, yes, yes, but also I am fearing 783 00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:47,920 Speaker 1: for my life or I think, especially because there's this 784 00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:51,040 Speaker 1: massive lore within the black community around all these martyrs 785 00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:53,480 Speaker 1: of the civil rights movement, that if you're doing that, 786 00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:55,680 Speaker 1: you're on the right path. Not necessarily what is that 787 00:40:55,719 --> 00:40:59,040 Speaker 1: doing to your heart and your soul? And it really 788 00:40:59,120 --> 00:41:02,000 Speaker 1: wasn't until I was being to other activists who had 789 00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:03,960 Speaker 1: also gotten threats that I was able to heal from 790 00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:05,719 Speaker 1: it because they had been in that same situation, which 791 00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:10,239 Speaker 1: is like so beyond. And I tell people now, like 792 00:41:10,239 --> 00:41:12,840 Speaker 1: when I speak on campuses, I'm like, please remember that 793 00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:16,160 Speaker 1: this is college and definitely push the envelope and do 794 00:41:16,239 --> 00:41:18,720 Speaker 1: as much as you can because it is the real world, 795 00:41:18,719 --> 00:41:21,880 Speaker 1: but you definitely are sometimes more insulated. But also remember 796 00:41:21,960 --> 00:41:23,920 Speaker 1: that you don't have to double major and then organize 797 00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:25,880 Speaker 1: all the protests, Like you can literally just be a 798 00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:29,920 Speaker 1: person and at a time exactly, and you can trust 799 00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:32,279 Speaker 1: that you have a coalition of people who also care 800 00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:34,040 Speaker 1: about what you care about and want to make the 801 00:41:34,080 --> 00:41:36,279 Speaker 1: world better, and you don't have to fight this war 802 00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:40,680 Speaker 1: by yourself. And I just try to be the person 803 00:41:40,719 --> 00:41:42,960 Speaker 1: that I needed in that moment. But I was also 804 00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:47,000 Speaker 1: bottling so much up, like it was just interpersonal drama 805 00:41:47,080 --> 00:41:51,440 Speaker 1: plus my papers do and it was definitely like trial 806 00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:53,640 Speaker 1: by fire. And the funniest thing about all of it 807 00:41:53,680 --> 00:41:55,880 Speaker 1: was that I was so done with Louisiana. Afterwards, I 808 00:41:55,880 --> 00:41:58,200 Speaker 1: was like, I'm not going back to Louisiana. I'm moving away. 809 00:41:58,239 --> 00:42:00,239 Speaker 1: So I moved to d C. I finished we Will 810 00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:02,960 Speaker 1: in like three years in a summer school because I 811 00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:05,920 Speaker 1: was getting threats. Of course, my grandparents who migrated out 812 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:08,840 Speaker 1: of Louisiana were like, why did you think we left Blair? 813 00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:11,719 Speaker 1: Like connect the dots, you know, uh. And they were 814 00:42:11,760 --> 00:42:13,640 Speaker 1: so afraid for me when I decided to move. But 815 00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:15,319 Speaker 1: they were like, she's stubborn, She'll have to learn on 816 00:42:15,320 --> 00:42:17,319 Speaker 1: her own. But the job I ended up getting, like 817 00:42:17,360 --> 00:42:19,560 Speaker 1: my first big girl job was at Planned Parenthood and 818 00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:21,640 Speaker 1: my job was to be the press officer in the 819 00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:24,600 Speaker 1: Southern States. So it was like, Awesome, I'm in the North. 820 00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:26,719 Speaker 1: And then they're like, and you're going back, and so 821 00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:28,880 Speaker 1: my job going back and you're going to be on 822 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:32,439 Speaker 1: the receiving end of more threats, Yeah, like very specific ones. 823 00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:35,720 Speaker 1: And so from twenty six seventeen, I was a press 824 00:42:35,760 --> 00:42:38,480 Speaker 1: officer for like a lot of the Southern plant parenthead affiliates. 825 00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:41,879 Speaker 1: And I'm so grateful that all those things aligned because 826 00:42:41,880 --> 00:42:43,920 Speaker 1: it gave me the opportunity to heal and being a 827 00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:47,759 Speaker 1: different mindset. But it also was really cathartic and I 828 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:49,680 Speaker 1: was able to use those skills that I had where 829 00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:52,320 Speaker 1: it was like, how can we come together and have 830 00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:54,600 Speaker 1: these tough conversations. A big part of my job was 831 00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:57,920 Speaker 1: teaching people how to talk about abortion from a religious standpoint, 832 00:42:58,040 --> 00:42:59,680 Speaker 1: and there's a big belief in the South that no 833 00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:02,160 Speaker 1: got f mint off my property, like this is ours. 834 00:43:02,640 --> 00:43:04,680 Speaker 1: And then also we're not judging my neighbor, even though 835 00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:06,399 Speaker 1: you probably will judge your neighbor. You'll just say bless 836 00:43:06,440 --> 00:43:09,560 Speaker 1: their heart afterward. But yeah, it was like, how do 837 00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:12,480 Speaker 1: we use that for the pursuit of justice? And I 838 00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:15,399 Speaker 1: saw so much progress. So I had felt so burnt 839 00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:17,200 Speaker 1: out and so kind of like defeated, where I know 840 00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,799 Speaker 1: we had wins at l s U, but I felt 841 00:43:19,840 --> 00:43:22,279 Speaker 1: like there was more I could do. And so that 842 00:43:22,400 --> 00:43:24,600 Speaker 1: was kind of like the conclusion of my organizing career. 843 00:43:24,680 --> 00:43:26,400 Speaker 1: Plus the first month that I was there, I got 844 00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:30,480 Speaker 1: arrested at the protests um around Alton Sterling. I remember 845 00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:34,200 Speaker 1: reading about that. But that's something I think is so interesting. 846 00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:38,719 Speaker 1: I think that that desire and I guess I I highlighted, 847 00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:40,960 Speaker 1: you know, my own version of it, which I know 848 00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:44,080 Speaker 1: is proximal, Like I know the threats many of us 849 00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:46,239 Speaker 1: are on the receiving end of as women who are 850 00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:50,759 Speaker 1: publicly advocating for change, and I know that you, as 851 00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:53,759 Speaker 1: a black woman publicly advocating for change, get a whole 852 00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:56,120 Speaker 1: other set and then you layer on that you are 853 00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:58,799 Speaker 1: a black, Muslim queer woman advocating for change, and I'm 854 00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:01,520 Speaker 1: just like, dude, I have months where I'm scared to 855 00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:05,640 Speaker 1: leave my house? How are you? And I guess that 856 00:44:05,760 --> 00:44:10,840 Speaker 1: it feels important to acknowledge that there is that burnout 857 00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:13,239 Speaker 1: that you know your family talked to you about, your 858 00:44:13,239 --> 00:44:16,040 Speaker 1: grandparents and your uncle, and that my parents warned me about. 859 00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:18,719 Speaker 1: And I, similarly to you, was like, we're going to 860 00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:21,240 Speaker 1: be the ones where the generation we're going to change 861 00:44:21,280 --> 00:44:26,760 Speaker 1: it all. And and my humble pie, as a public 862 00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:32,280 Speaker 1: advocate and activist, came with, oh, people have been working 863 00:44:32,400 --> 00:44:37,640 Speaker 1: on this for literal hundreds of years. So if I 864 00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:41,040 Speaker 1: think in my little brain that it's going to be 865 00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:42,960 Speaker 1: me and you and all our friends who are the 866 00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:45,719 Speaker 1: ones that push it over the edge, of course we're 867 00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:47,520 Speaker 1: going to burn ourselves out. What are we gonna do 868 00:44:48,360 --> 00:44:51,080 Speaker 1: in these you know, ten year blocks of our lives 869 00:44:51,640 --> 00:44:55,080 Speaker 1: that's gonna change the last four hundred, six hundred years 870 00:44:55,200 --> 00:44:59,279 Speaker 1: of what we've been trying to alter for the better, 871 00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:04,919 Speaker 1: for the greater good. And in a way it made 872 00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:09,320 Speaker 1: me get really practical about leaning into the reality of 873 00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:13,520 Speaker 1: we might move the needle say, say the last generation 874 00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:16,440 Speaker 1: moved at five clicks, let's hope we can move it six. 875 00:45:17,920 --> 00:45:20,520 Speaker 1: Let's hope. And and we're going to try our best. 876 00:45:20,640 --> 00:45:21,960 Speaker 1: And we have to stay in it for a long 877 00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:25,279 Speaker 1: time because it doesn't refresh like our phone. It isn't 878 00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:28,560 Speaker 1: a quick turnover, It isn't sexy. It's a long haul job. 879 00:45:29,719 --> 00:45:32,160 Speaker 1: And and if I think about it in that way, 880 00:45:33,040 --> 00:45:36,560 Speaker 1: how do I better take care of myself so I 881 00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:39,600 Speaker 1: don't completely burn out? How do I encourage the women 882 00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:43,080 Speaker 1: in my life, in our larger circles, my friends, my 883 00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:48,560 Speaker 1: co workers, how do we give ourselves a little release 884 00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:51,480 Speaker 1: on that pressure valve? And how do we do it 885 00:45:51,520 --> 00:45:53,759 Speaker 1: as a team rather than saying if I don't do it, 886 00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:56,600 Speaker 1: it's not going to get done. What does a decentralized 887 00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:59,799 Speaker 1: system of power look like an advocacy that we might 888 00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:04,520 Speaker 1: and model in our society. That that was a reckoning 889 00:46:05,040 --> 00:46:07,640 Speaker 1: for me starting to think about those things, And I 890 00:46:07,719 --> 00:46:09,880 Speaker 1: think I have like just a quick story about what 891 00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:12,400 Speaker 1: that looks like materially, because I think sometimes we think 892 00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:15,759 Speaker 1: it's like a big, grandiose overture of something that's really big, 893 00:46:16,000 --> 00:46:18,920 Speaker 1: big to do, and sometimes it's small acts of compassion 894 00:46:19,320 --> 00:46:22,520 Speaker 1: where we might inconvenience ourselves in the moment, but it's 895 00:46:22,560 --> 00:46:25,040 Speaker 1: in the pursuit of helping somebody else. And I think 896 00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:28,160 Speaker 1: about my coworker Danielle, and I actually called her and 897 00:46:28,200 --> 00:46:30,279 Speaker 1: talked to her about this. It was years after the fact, 898 00:46:30,640 --> 00:46:33,239 Speaker 1: but it was my first time going to Birmingham and 899 00:46:34,080 --> 00:46:36,120 Speaker 1: as a black person, like as you're saying all the 900 00:46:36,719 --> 00:46:39,239 Speaker 1: identities I embody and then going back to a place 901 00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:42,680 Speaker 1: where when I would drive down to Florida for spring break, 902 00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:45,840 Speaker 1: I was definitely trying to skip Mississippi and Alabama and 903 00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:47,439 Speaker 1: just hold it till we got to the other side 904 00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:50,839 Speaker 1: because there's so much trauma there. And I remember freaking out, 905 00:46:50,880 --> 00:46:52,360 Speaker 1: like we're in a meeting and I'm pretty sure I 906 00:46:52,400 --> 00:46:54,600 Speaker 1: just like dissociated completely. They're like, Okay, then Blair will 907 00:46:54,640 --> 00:46:56,359 Speaker 1: go down and then train folks in Birmingham and then 908 00:46:56,360 --> 00:47:00,160 Speaker 1: we'll do that, and I'm just sitting there like no, no, no, 909 00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:02,160 Speaker 1: no no, and just freaking out. And I had to 910 00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:04,160 Speaker 1: think that Danielle saw me in that moment and she 911 00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:05,759 Speaker 1: was just like, Okay, and I'm gonna go with Blair. 912 00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:08,319 Speaker 1: It's her first time training this affiliate. I'll just want 913 00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:10,400 Speaker 1: to be there and it was a moment where she 914 00:47:10,520 --> 00:47:13,200 Speaker 1: looked into her humanity and was like, I don't want 915 00:47:13,239 --> 00:47:15,960 Speaker 1: Blair to go by one. Blair's the only visible Muslim 916 00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:18,040 Speaker 1: person here, She's one of the black folks that's on 917 00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:21,160 Speaker 1: this communications team. Let's make sure that we're supporting her. 918 00:47:21,239 --> 00:47:25,120 Speaker 1: And it was just her being present. And I have tried, 919 00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:27,600 Speaker 1: I've exploited expressed her in that moment, but then of 920 00:47:27,640 --> 00:47:28,920 Speaker 1: course I think it was like last year I called 921 00:47:28,960 --> 00:47:32,680 Speaker 1: her about it, how grateful I was because it was 922 00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:36,280 Speaker 1: such a scary experience that she didn't have to accompany 923 00:47:36,360 --> 00:47:38,920 Speaker 1: me with. She didn't have to use her privilege as 924 00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:41,160 Speaker 1: a white woman to come with me, as somebody who 925 00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:43,880 Speaker 1: was more targeted by different systems of oppression, to be 926 00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:45,960 Speaker 1: there for me. I'm sure she had things that she 927 00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:48,439 Speaker 1: was also doing, deadlines that she had to push back, 928 00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:51,440 Speaker 1: but she also had the seniority and the power in that, 929 00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:53,359 Speaker 1: you know, at planned parenthood, to be able to say, hey, 930 00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:56,000 Speaker 1: actually this needs I need to go with Blair um. 931 00:47:57,040 --> 00:48:00,520 Speaker 1: And it's those things where she made herself in convenience 932 00:48:01,040 --> 00:48:05,000 Speaker 1: to an immeasurable degree of benefit to me. And I 933 00:48:05,080 --> 00:48:07,600 Speaker 1: really felt seen in that moment and it's those things. 934 00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,880 Speaker 1: It's not necessarily that we need to raise a million 935 00:48:10,960 --> 00:48:13,640 Speaker 1: dollars for a given organization. Sometimes it's having a tough 936 00:48:13,719 --> 00:48:17,360 Speaker 1: conversation with your friend that keeps miss gendering somebody, or 937 00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:20,480 Speaker 1: having a tough conversation with casting if you're able to 938 00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:23,040 Speaker 1: have seniority on a set and say we actually need 939 00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,120 Speaker 1: to have more black folks in front of and behind 940 00:48:25,160 --> 00:48:29,080 Speaker 1: the scenes. And it's those small acts that ladder up 941 00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:33,120 Speaker 1: to big change. And that's like the most concrete example 942 00:48:33,160 --> 00:48:35,600 Speaker 1: I can possibly think of because it meant so much. 943 00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:36,960 Speaker 1: And for her it was just kind of like a 944 00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:39,759 Speaker 1: squid Blair looks super uncomfortable. I don't want her going 945 00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:42,360 Speaker 1: by herself. I'm just gonna step up. And for me 946 00:48:42,480 --> 00:48:44,880 Speaker 1: it was like, oh my goodness, thank thank God for 947 00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:48,360 Speaker 1: this person seeing me and using their privilege so that 948 00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:51,880 Speaker 1: I could just do my best at my job, but 949 00:48:51,960 --> 00:48:56,040 Speaker 1: then also acknowledge the fact that I was terrified. And 950 00:48:56,200 --> 00:49:00,480 Speaker 1: so it's those acts of humanity and sharing our humanity. 951 00:49:01,040 --> 00:49:04,120 Speaker 1: But it also is about emotion, right, It's using our 952 00:49:04,160 --> 00:49:07,480 Speaker 1: emotional intelligence to look at other people's experiences and maybe 953 00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:09,400 Speaker 1: sometimes asking out loud, can I help you? Can I 954 00:49:09,480 --> 00:49:12,319 Speaker 1: support you? And being okay with no, and other times 955 00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:14,200 Speaker 1: making the judgment call that maybe I can be of 956 00:49:14,520 --> 00:49:17,759 Speaker 1: use here, maybe I can be of service. Yeah, that's 957 00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:21,560 Speaker 1: been such a a great clicking up, if you will, 958 00:49:21,760 --> 00:49:27,960 Speaker 1: for me in my awareness in communities like our extended 959 00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:30,560 Speaker 1: community of people who are really out trying to do 960 00:49:30,640 --> 00:49:35,239 Speaker 1: the work when things happen years ago, you know I 961 00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:37,279 Speaker 1: would I would reach out and just say, hey, I 962 00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:40,160 Speaker 1: saw this. Are you okay? What's going on? You know? 963 00:49:40,440 --> 00:49:45,120 Speaker 1: Do you need anything? And just the learning of being 964 00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:48,200 Speaker 1: in a in a community and and learning the types 965 00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:51,920 Speaker 1: of lessons you're referring to has made a change for 966 00:49:52,040 --> 00:49:54,960 Speaker 1: me where when anything's going on in the life of 967 00:49:56,520 --> 00:50:00,200 Speaker 1: a woman you know, or a friend, anyone who's kind 968 00:50:00,200 --> 00:50:02,520 Speaker 1: of out there writing for the future, if you will, 969 00:50:03,280 --> 00:50:05,520 Speaker 1: I don't reach out and say hey, do you need 970 00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:08,719 Speaker 1: anything anymore? I always say I saw this. How can 971 00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:13,480 Speaker 1: I support you right now? Just tell me, like literally, 972 00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,880 Speaker 1: if you need a delivery of groceries, or if you 973 00:50:16,960 --> 00:50:19,600 Speaker 1: need somebody to hop on a phone call or show 974 00:50:19,719 --> 00:50:21,440 Speaker 1: up to a meeting or be on a zoom, just 975 00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:24,000 Speaker 1: how can I support you right now? And it gives 976 00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:29,800 Speaker 1: people the permission two ask differently and I think about 977 00:50:29,840 --> 00:50:32,440 Speaker 1: how even you sharing that story of what you experienced 978 00:50:32,480 --> 00:50:36,560 Speaker 1: with your coworker might make someone who's listening that's in 979 00:50:36,600 --> 00:50:39,560 Speaker 1: a position similar to yours, or perhaps in a position 980 00:50:39,640 --> 00:50:43,839 Speaker 1: similar to hers, be able to say, oh, I need 981 00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:46,920 Speaker 1: this kind of support, or I can lend this kind 982 00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:49,959 Speaker 1: of support right now. And the thing is I didn't 983 00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:51,680 Speaker 1: even know her that well, And it's like, we don't 984 00:50:51,719 --> 00:50:53,840 Speaker 1: have to be best beds with folks to extend that. 985 00:50:54,280 --> 00:50:56,360 Speaker 1: I have another example, it's like all the women who'd 986 00:50:56,360 --> 00:50:58,399 Speaker 1: like to help my career. A woman named Julia who 987 00:50:58,440 --> 00:51:01,400 Speaker 1: worked at the Center for Disability Advocacy. I worked at 988 00:51:01,440 --> 00:51:03,640 Speaker 1: Heineken before I worked at Planning Parenthood, and on the 989 00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:05,640 Speaker 1: floor there was it was. It was in government relations. 990 00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:07,000 Speaker 1: People like, you're a musclem that worked in beer, and 991 00:51:07,040 --> 00:51:09,359 Speaker 1: I'm like yeah. In fact, when I did my TED talk, 992 00:51:09,440 --> 00:51:10,879 Speaker 1: I mentioned that I used to work in the beer 993 00:51:10,880 --> 00:51:13,680 Speaker 1: industry as kind of a litmus test, because if you're 994 00:51:13,680 --> 00:51:16,520 Speaker 1: really like an Orthodox person and you're not homophobic and 995 00:51:16,600 --> 00:51:18,719 Speaker 1: like scare quotes, then you would be upset that I 996 00:51:18,800 --> 00:51:21,200 Speaker 1: worked in beer and that I was gay. But there's 997 00:51:21,200 --> 00:51:22,800 Speaker 1: a lot of people who are just more upset about 998 00:51:22,880 --> 00:51:25,080 Speaker 1: the fact that I'm bisexual than anything else. But anyway, 999 00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:27,360 Speaker 1: So I was in Pine Niken and government relations. We 1000 00:51:27,440 --> 00:51:30,040 Speaker 1: shared a floor and Julia worked at the Center for 1001 00:51:30,120 --> 00:51:32,480 Speaker 1: Disability Advocacy, which was on that shared floor, so the 1002 00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:35,680 Speaker 1: shared bathroom, and I was in the bathroom. Absolutely just 1003 00:51:35,800 --> 00:51:38,200 Speaker 1: try you've had moments like this, like if you ever worked, 1004 00:51:38,239 --> 00:51:40,800 Speaker 1: like any circumstance where just under a lot of pressure 1005 00:51:41,120 --> 00:51:42,920 Speaker 1: kind of like okay, well I have to step right out, 1006 00:51:42,960 --> 00:51:45,120 Speaker 1: I'll be right back. It used in the bathroom and 1007 00:51:45,160 --> 00:51:46,919 Speaker 1: I was trying to ask my boss for a raise, 1008 00:51:47,360 --> 00:51:49,160 Speaker 1: and I was so freaked out about it, and she 1009 00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:50,960 Speaker 1: was just like, al right, girl, how could what are 1010 00:51:51,000 --> 00:51:52,759 Speaker 1: we how can we support? She just was like, I'll 1011 00:51:52,760 --> 00:51:54,279 Speaker 1: be right back. She brought me a cup of water. 1012 00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:58,040 Speaker 1: We talked through some steps, and it's those moments where 1013 00:51:58,080 --> 00:52:01,279 Speaker 1: you're just acknowledging somebody else's human be and now we're friends, 1014 00:52:01,320 --> 00:52:04,920 Speaker 1: we still keep in touch, and it's those things that 1015 00:52:05,040 --> 00:52:07,759 Speaker 1: make a true difference, because she easily could have been like, oh, 1016 00:52:07,880 --> 00:52:10,080 Speaker 1: that's drama I'm not stepping into And sometimes we make 1017 00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:14,240 Speaker 1: that call. But other times, and I think more valuable 1018 00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:17,920 Speaker 1: and compassionate times, we go this person might need a 1019 00:52:17,920 --> 00:52:20,960 Speaker 1: cup of water, this person might need some assistance, and 1020 00:52:21,160 --> 00:52:24,200 Speaker 1: I'm just going to make myself of service so that 1021 00:52:24,360 --> 00:52:26,880 Speaker 1: way and then give them the you know, the option 1022 00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:29,720 Speaker 1: to to to decline that, but definitely just to be present. 1023 00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:33,160 Speaker 1: And it's those steps that I think really dictate how 1024 00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:35,919 Speaker 1: we're remembered and what our legacy is on this earth, 1025 00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:38,600 Speaker 1: because it is those ten year intervals. But it's not 1026 00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:41,520 Speaker 1: sometimes the fact that we did one grandiose gesture, but 1027 00:52:41,600 --> 00:52:46,399 Speaker 1: all the little things together that make a difference when 1028 00:52:46,480 --> 00:52:48,840 Speaker 1: you think about that kind of showing up, you know, 1029 00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:50,880 Speaker 1: whether it's in a one on one moment or or 1030 00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:54,640 Speaker 1: at as you said, organizing a protest. You know, you 1031 00:52:54,719 --> 00:52:58,239 Speaker 1: mentioned that you got arrested at the Aults and Sterling protest. 1032 00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:04,239 Speaker 1: Can you kind of walk us through what that's like. 1033 00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:08,920 Speaker 1: You know, lots of people feel more permission now, I 1034 00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:13,000 Speaker 1: think to speak up about elections and politics and each 1035 00:53:13,040 --> 00:53:16,360 Speaker 1: other and community advocacy, but really being on the ground 1036 00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:20,040 Speaker 1: protesting things like police violence and then being subject to 1037 00:53:20,160 --> 00:53:23,800 Speaker 1: police violence in this community in the South where you 1038 00:53:23,920 --> 00:53:29,640 Speaker 1: knew you were more at risk. Can you can you 1039 00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:32,480 Speaker 1: share just a little bit about that maybe for people 1040 00:53:32,520 --> 00:53:36,880 Speaker 1: who want to advocate, but also might be afraid to 1041 00:53:36,960 --> 00:53:40,239 Speaker 1: show up on a front line like that. I will 1042 00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:42,920 Speaker 1: definitely say that a lot of it was just bold, 1043 00:53:43,040 --> 00:53:45,400 Speaker 1: reckless naivety, where I was just kind of like, I 1044 00:53:45,480 --> 00:53:48,600 Speaker 1: can do it, and not necessarily what's the fallout. I 1045 00:53:48,640 --> 00:53:52,719 Speaker 1: think that sometimes it's the consequence of being so ready 1046 00:53:52,800 --> 00:53:55,040 Speaker 1: to go to like shatter a glass ceiling, that we 1047 00:53:55,080 --> 00:53:56,799 Speaker 1: don't really think about where the glass is going to fall, 1048 00:53:57,800 --> 00:54:01,359 Speaker 1: and I don't recommend at I think sometimes we can't 1049 00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:04,319 Speaker 1: help it. I also accidentally came out on the Chucker 1050 00:54:04,360 --> 00:54:07,719 Speaker 1: Carlson Tonight show. I was thinking, Wow, I've spent the 1051 00:54:07,800 --> 00:54:10,239 Speaker 1: past year talking about abortion in the South. I can 1052 00:54:10,320 --> 00:54:12,920 Speaker 1: do anything. I'm not thinking about how volatile is this 1053 00:54:13,080 --> 00:54:16,200 Speaker 1: man's audience and will like what will the consequences be? 1054 00:54:16,840 --> 00:54:19,800 Speaker 1: And in one breath I'm glad that I wasn't afraid 1055 00:54:19,840 --> 00:54:21,279 Speaker 1: of those things, And in the other breath, I'm like, 1056 00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:23,399 Speaker 1: oh girl, you in danger, Like really take a step 1057 00:54:23,400 --> 00:54:25,319 Speaker 1: back and consider those things. And so what I tell 1058 00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:28,600 Speaker 1: people to do now is to consider their sphere of 1059 00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:32,160 Speaker 1: influence about the things that they can take action for. Like, 1060 00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:34,839 Speaker 1: say you live near dl Rio and you're seeing what's 1061 00:54:34,840 --> 00:54:37,719 Speaker 1: happening to Haitian immigrants, people who are trying to seek 1062 00:54:37,760 --> 00:54:40,360 Speaker 1: refuge in asylum. If you're in that vicinity and you 1063 00:54:40,400 --> 00:54:41,960 Speaker 1: don't have a warrant for your rest, and you know 1064 00:54:42,040 --> 00:54:43,920 Speaker 1: that you exist in a body that won't be impacted 1065 00:54:43,960 --> 00:54:46,520 Speaker 1: by police and that you are a citizen, sometimes showing 1066 00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:48,880 Speaker 1: up and bringing water are the best things that you 1067 00:54:48,920 --> 00:54:51,040 Speaker 1: can do. I also think about all of the people 1068 00:54:51,080 --> 00:54:54,880 Speaker 1: who just brought handwarmers and boxes of pizza, two people 1069 00:54:55,239 --> 00:54:59,600 Speaker 1: at JFK when there was the whole conversation around the 1070 00:54:59,680 --> 00:55:01,880 Speaker 1: muscle van, Like I still have a picture on my 1071 00:55:01,960 --> 00:55:04,120 Speaker 1: phone about this woman who just brought ten boxes of 1072 00:55:04,160 --> 00:55:06,200 Speaker 1: pizza and was like, I lived nearby. I just thought 1073 00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:08,480 Speaker 1: i'd bring something, and I was just like correct, like yes, 1074 00:55:08,560 --> 00:55:10,839 Speaker 1: that's what you're supposed to do. And so I think 1075 00:55:10,880 --> 00:55:13,479 Speaker 1: it's like what can I do? But then also really 1076 00:55:13,800 --> 00:55:16,040 Speaker 1: taking stock of things, I think that sometimes we can 1077 00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:20,200 Speaker 1: let our passions lead us in the not wisest or 1078 00:55:20,239 --> 00:55:22,680 Speaker 1: more strategic direction. Like sometimes we'll go, oh, I'm going 1079 00:55:22,719 --> 00:55:24,600 Speaker 1: to show up, but like oh snap, there's a warrant 1080 00:55:24,680 --> 00:55:27,120 Speaker 1: for me, or oh snap, like I can't do this 1081 00:55:27,160 --> 00:55:28,719 Speaker 1: because I will lose my job and I won't be 1082 00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:30,320 Speaker 1: able to pay rent. We have to live in the 1083 00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:33,359 Speaker 1: reality that we exist in while also trying to fight 1084 00:55:33,440 --> 00:55:35,880 Speaker 1: for a better future. So it means being really practical 1085 00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:38,200 Speaker 1: and really strategic. And the example I use is thinking 1086 00:55:38,239 --> 00:55:40,520 Speaker 1: about activism like a pot luck and say that you 1087 00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:42,200 Speaker 1: want to be the be the person that brings like 1088 00:55:42,320 --> 00:55:44,759 Speaker 1: the rock star mac and cheese, but you've never made 1089 00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:47,200 Speaker 1: mac and cheese before, you have a dairy and gluten allergy, 1090 00:55:47,280 --> 00:55:50,759 Speaker 1: and you're not really good at substitutes. And meanwhile, your 1091 00:55:50,840 --> 00:55:53,960 Speaker 1: best friend Becky just brought you like this fresh caught tuna, 1092 00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:57,120 Speaker 1: and you have our chosen a mayonnaise and you have 1093 00:55:57,239 --> 00:55:59,919 Speaker 1: fresh gill and celery. Sounds like you should be bringing 1094 00:55:59,920 --> 00:56:02,600 Speaker 1: the tuna salad and not bringing the mac and cheese, 1095 00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:06,279 Speaker 1: especially because Dolores across the street brings the best mac 1096 00:56:06,320 --> 00:56:08,160 Speaker 1: and cheese every year. So maybe you go over to 1097 00:56:08,200 --> 00:56:11,120 Speaker 1: Dolores's house and after the pandemic right and you figure 1098 00:56:11,120 --> 00:56:13,000 Speaker 1: out how you can learn to make that mac and cheese. 1099 00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:14,799 Speaker 1: But at the same time, you bring what your best 1100 00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:17,680 Speaker 1: equipped to bring, which is that tuna salad. And nobody 1101 00:56:17,719 --> 00:56:19,680 Speaker 1: really wants to bring the tuna salad, but it's what 1102 00:56:19,800 --> 00:56:22,160 Speaker 1: you need to bring. To this pot luck of justice 1103 00:56:22,560 --> 00:56:25,040 Speaker 1: to effect change, and so it's looking at your tool 1104 00:56:25,080 --> 00:56:26,719 Speaker 1: set that way. So for me, like my Mac and 1105 00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:29,000 Speaker 1: cheese is being a frontline activist, but I can't do 1106 00:56:29,080 --> 00:56:31,040 Speaker 1: that anymore. It's not good for my mental health. It's 1107 00:56:31,040 --> 00:56:33,360 Speaker 1: not where I'm most effective. I went to a protest 1108 00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:37,080 Speaker 1: in San Marino and all of my racial trauma just 1109 00:56:37,200 --> 00:56:39,600 Speaker 1: well to the surface, and I was just sobbing the 1110 00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:42,040 Speaker 1: whole time, and it was the most safe space you 1111 00:56:42,080 --> 00:56:43,719 Speaker 1: could imagine where it was just like a bunch of 1112 00:56:43,760 --> 00:56:47,240 Speaker 1: people and Grandma's holding signs that said black lives matter. Meanwhile, 1113 00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:50,080 Speaker 1: I'm reacting to this like I'm getting arrested again, which 1114 00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:52,200 Speaker 1: just reminds me that I'm traumatized and I don't need 1115 00:56:52,239 --> 00:56:55,240 Speaker 1: to put myself in those situations. So I Tuna Salad 1116 00:56:55,400 --> 00:56:57,600 Speaker 1: is me being an educator and talking to people about 1117 00:56:57,680 --> 00:57:00,759 Speaker 1: how they can affect change, teaching folks how will apologize 1118 00:57:00,800 --> 00:57:03,200 Speaker 1: that they could be more compassionate and understanding and have 1119 00:57:03,280 --> 00:57:06,920 Speaker 1: better interpersonal relationships. And I'm thriving at this. It might 1120 00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:09,719 Speaker 1: not be what I envisioned for myself, but it's what 1121 00:57:09,800 --> 00:57:11,760 Speaker 1: I'm good at and it's how I can best serve people, 1122 00:57:12,080 --> 00:57:13,600 Speaker 1: and I think those are the steps that we have 1123 00:57:13,680 --> 00:57:14,920 Speaker 1: to take. So we have to figure out what's in 1124 00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:17,320 Speaker 1: our fridge and what we need to bring, and it 1125 00:57:17,400 --> 00:57:18,600 Speaker 1: might not be what we want to bring, but it 1126 00:57:18,680 --> 00:57:21,400 Speaker 1: might be what we're called upon to do. I really 1127 00:57:21,520 --> 00:57:24,080 Speaker 1: love that, and I think it's also really important to 1128 00:57:24,160 --> 00:57:27,040 Speaker 1: remember that if we're lucky, we're all going to live 1129 00:57:27,120 --> 00:57:29,880 Speaker 1: long lives. You might start off being the mac and 1130 00:57:29,960 --> 00:57:32,840 Speaker 1: cheese person and become the tuna salad person. You will 1131 00:57:32,880 --> 00:57:36,720 Speaker 1: have stages of what your gifts are. And I am 1132 00:57:36,880 --> 00:57:40,480 Speaker 1: certainly aware that I am in a stage where I 1133 00:57:41,120 --> 00:57:44,560 Speaker 1: am having to give myself some gifts. Because I've spent 1134 00:57:44,720 --> 00:57:47,600 Speaker 1: most of my career giving everything I can to other people. 1135 00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:51,880 Speaker 1: I am having to bring some of those resources back 1136 00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:56,600 Speaker 1: in and create some new space. And I know that 1137 00:57:56,720 --> 00:57:59,960 Speaker 1: what's on the other side of what I'm learning experience 1138 00:58:00,000 --> 00:58:04,959 Speaker 1: and seeing, meditating on sort of recalibrating. I know there's 1139 00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:09,120 Speaker 1: going to be a next dish. And I think it's 1140 00:58:09,160 --> 00:58:11,680 Speaker 1: really important, whether it's in the ways we show up 1141 00:58:11,840 --> 00:58:14,000 Speaker 1: that you're talking about, or even in the things where 1142 00:58:14,080 --> 00:58:17,400 Speaker 1: you know quote unquote meant to do, like in our careers, 1143 00:58:18,320 --> 00:58:21,800 Speaker 1: um in our family structures, It's really important to give 1144 00:58:21,840 --> 00:58:25,400 Speaker 1: yourself permission to do a new thing, to change your 1145 00:58:25,440 --> 00:58:28,439 Speaker 1: mind about what you're good at. You know. That's that's 1146 00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:31,880 Speaker 1: where we can I love the metaphor. I'm just going 1147 00:58:31,920 --> 00:58:33,680 Speaker 1: to really lean into it. That's how we throw the 1148 00:58:33,760 --> 00:58:36,720 Speaker 1: best potluck. That's how we have the most variety at 1149 00:58:36,760 --> 00:58:41,200 Speaker 1: the table. And I I'm so excited as a person 1150 00:58:41,280 --> 00:58:45,000 Speaker 1: who is truly just a fan and an admirer of yours, 1151 00:58:45,560 --> 00:58:47,680 Speaker 1: um you know who loves when we like leave each 1152 00:58:47,680 --> 00:58:52,200 Speaker 1: other messages on photos and things. I'm excited to see 1153 00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:55,640 Speaker 1: what new things you've been cooking up. Your first book, 1154 00:58:55,760 --> 00:59:00,200 Speaker 1: Modern History, your micro video series Smarter and Seconds. Like 1155 00:59:01,080 --> 00:59:03,160 Speaker 1: you sit on the board of the Tegan and Sarah Foundation, 1156 00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:06,560 Speaker 1: there are all these things that you have made are 1157 00:59:06,760 --> 00:59:10,000 Speaker 1: making ways you are serving. Can you tell the folks 1158 00:59:10,040 --> 00:59:11,960 Speaker 1: at home a little bit about those things before we 1159 00:59:12,000 --> 00:59:14,400 Speaker 1: get into the new book. I want to. I want 1160 00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:17,600 Speaker 1: to get through what what's been cooking and what's on 1161 00:59:17,720 --> 00:59:20,520 Speaker 1: the on the stove now, Well, like Smarter and Seconds 1162 00:59:20,560 --> 00:59:23,200 Speaker 1: definitely was a smash hit in ways that I couldn't 1163 00:59:23,200 --> 00:59:25,520 Speaker 1: even anticipate. Where even now, like when I'm on board 1164 00:59:25,520 --> 00:59:27,360 Speaker 1: meetings at the Tegan and Sarah Foundation, like we just 1165 00:59:27,440 --> 00:59:29,760 Speaker 1: had one recently. They had a video of me doing 1166 00:59:29,800 --> 00:59:31,880 Speaker 1: the lesson on rainbow washing, and I'm like, wow, my 1167 00:59:31,960 --> 00:59:34,320 Speaker 1: worlds are really colliding. Or when I was at fashion 1168 00:59:34,360 --> 00:59:36,880 Speaker 1: Week and all of my friends who are well established 1169 00:59:36,920 --> 00:59:39,040 Speaker 1: in different entertainment fields are like singing my Smarter and 1170 00:59:39,080 --> 00:59:41,640 Speaker 1: Seconds jingle back to me. I feel like this is 1171 00:59:41,680 --> 00:59:43,520 Speaker 1: a really great example. But I was just talking about 1172 00:59:43,560 --> 00:59:45,840 Speaker 1: where Reels was coming out. I've always wanted to be 1173 00:59:45,920 --> 00:59:48,320 Speaker 1: like a Vine star, but Vine doesn't exist anymore. And 1174 00:59:48,400 --> 00:59:50,320 Speaker 1: I know I have these skills and I have like 1175 00:59:50,360 --> 00:59:53,240 Speaker 1: a stage presence, but when it's a short video format, 1176 00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:54,880 Speaker 1: I'm not going to do songs and dances. I'm not 1177 00:59:54,880 --> 00:59:56,280 Speaker 1: going to do makeup looks. I'm not going to do 1178 00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:58,800 Speaker 1: clothing transitions, not because I don't want to, but just 1179 00:59:58,800 --> 01:00:00,720 Speaker 1: because I don't want to embarrass my so but what 1180 01:00:00,840 --> 01:00:03,960 Speaker 1: I can do is talk really fast. I can talk 1181 01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:05,800 Speaker 1: really fast, and I can educate people about things in 1182 01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:08,440 Speaker 1: a short, snappy way. And I reached out to one 1183 01:00:08,440 --> 01:00:11,120 Speaker 1: of my friends who's a genius at branding, Courtney Quinn, 1184 01:00:11,160 --> 01:00:13,960 Speaker 1: who's at color Me Courtney, and she was like Smarter 1185 01:00:14,040 --> 01:00:15,720 Speaker 1: and Seconds like she was throwing out in different names, 1186 01:00:15,760 --> 01:00:17,920 Speaker 1: and she ended up naming it Smarter and Seconds. And 1187 01:00:18,440 --> 01:00:20,800 Speaker 1: I mean the first videos were just getting millions of views. 1188 01:00:20,880 --> 01:00:22,880 Speaker 1: Now I have like fifty million views under my belt. 1189 01:00:23,200 --> 01:00:25,560 Speaker 1: So we're actually going to be doing another vertical soon 1190 01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:29,040 Speaker 1: called Science and Seconds because there's a lack of understanding 1191 01:00:29,080 --> 01:00:31,520 Speaker 1: about science, and it will be teaching people about the 1192 01:00:31,760 --> 01:00:35,720 Speaker 1: ring cycle pollution, d n A m r n A 1193 01:00:35,960 --> 01:00:39,080 Speaker 1: to get lesson about vaccines in there. You know, vaccines 1194 01:00:39,160 --> 01:00:43,560 Speaker 1: don't change your DNA exactly. So many different basic materials 1195 01:00:43,600 --> 01:00:45,480 Speaker 1: that I can get across in thirty seconds or less. 1196 01:00:45,520 --> 01:00:47,200 Speaker 1: And so if Bill Nye is a listener, I'd love 1197 01:00:47,240 --> 01:00:48,960 Speaker 1: for him to reach out to us or my people 1198 01:00:48,960 --> 01:00:50,320 Speaker 1: will be in touch with your people, Bill Nye, if 1199 01:00:50,360 --> 01:00:54,400 Speaker 1: you happen to listen to Sophia Bush's podcast, Bill Nye 1200 01:00:54,480 --> 01:00:56,440 Speaker 1: and Icon And so I want to do these more 1201 01:00:56,520 --> 01:00:59,640 Speaker 1: comprehensive things even as I'm leading into this new book, 1202 01:01:00,120 --> 01:01:02,560 Speaker 1: but I'm also on the board of the Muslims for 1203 01:01:02,600 --> 01:01:05,680 Speaker 1: Progressive Values. I just really try to make sure that 1204 01:01:05,840 --> 01:01:08,880 Speaker 1: I am maximizing my time on Earth and then also resting. 1205 01:01:08,960 --> 01:01:10,360 Speaker 1: So like yesterday, I went to bed at like three 1206 01:01:10,440 --> 01:01:12,600 Speaker 1: pm because I did a thirty six hour trip to 1207 01:01:12,680 --> 01:01:16,160 Speaker 1: New York, and I never doing that again, but I 1208 01:01:16,240 --> 01:01:18,520 Speaker 1: had to do it for the specific work task. So 1209 01:01:18,680 --> 01:01:20,600 Speaker 1: I do try to rest as well, but I try 1210 01:01:20,640 --> 01:01:22,360 Speaker 1: to do things that make me joyful. And I really 1211 01:01:22,440 --> 01:01:25,000 Speaker 1: love teaching people, and I really love interacting with my smarties, 1212 01:01:25,120 --> 01:01:26,800 Speaker 1: and it's so great that I get to do that 1213 01:01:26,840 --> 01:01:29,480 Speaker 1: for a living. I love it. I love that we 1214 01:01:29,720 --> 01:01:33,320 Speaker 1: have communities of smarties. I literally call the listeners of 1215 01:01:33,400 --> 01:01:36,680 Speaker 1: this show whip smarties. Yes, you know I It's the 1216 01:01:36,840 --> 01:01:38,920 Speaker 1: only thing I want is for us to get smarter 1217 01:01:39,080 --> 01:01:42,720 Speaker 1: and more empathetic and to respect science and understand data 1218 01:01:42,760 --> 01:01:45,640 Speaker 1: and feel empowered by all of it. And and I 1219 01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:47,440 Speaker 1: think that's so much of the work that you do 1220 01:01:48,120 --> 01:01:50,400 Speaker 1: feels to me again, as you know, if you were 1221 01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:54,120 Speaker 1: like you have a very similar goal. And the book, 1222 01:01:54,600 --> 01:01:57,040 Speaker 1: the new book is called Read This to Get Smarter. 1223 01:01:57,200 --> 01:01:59,880 Speaker 1: So can you tell people a little bit about it? 1224 01:02:00,240 --> 01:02:04,560 Speaker 1: And and what led you to this being your next project? Okay, 1225 01:02:04,600 --> 01:02:08,280 Speaker 1: so this being my new project. What happened basically was 1226 01:02:08,400 --> 01:02:10,920 Speaker 1: I made this kind of jump the Shark video for 1227 01:02:11,120 --> 01:02:13,720 Speaker 1: Smarter and seconds where I think only happy days and 1228 01:02:13,840 --> 01:02:15,640 Speaker 1: millennials are going to get that. So it's basically like 1229 01:02:15,680 --> 01:02:16,880 Speaker 1: when you do something where it's like, Okay, this is 1230 01:02:16,960 --> 01:02:18,280 Speaker 1: kind of over the top, is this going to ruin 1231 01:02:18,360 --> 01:02:20,720 Speaker 1: the flow? And I did like a singing video where 1232 01:02:20,760 --> 01:02:23,240 Speaker 1: I was talking about how you may have heard that 1233 01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:25,640 Speaker 1: cowboys were white, but that just ain't the whole truth, 1234 01:02:25,680 --> 01:02:26,840 Speaker 1: and I like totally saying it. I'm not going to 1235 01:02:26,920 --> 01:02:28,840 Speaker 1: do it here, um, but I talked about how like 1236 01:02:29,000 --> 01:02:32,600 Speaker 1: cowboys were also black and indigenous and of Mexican nationality 1237 01:02:32,760 --> 01:02:35,400 Speaker 1: and like other backgrounds too. And the editor for my 1238 01:02:35,480 --> 01:02:37,840 Speaker 1: last two books, like hey, where we're all really loving 1239 01:02:37,840 --> 01:02:40,480 Speaker 1: Smarter and Seconds, would you have a conversation with us 1240 01:02:40,480 --> 01:02:43,200 Speaker 1: about potentially and doing another book? And at this time, 1241 01:02:43,360 --> 01:02:44,760 Speaker 1: I have to tell you, I was like, I'm never 1242 01:02:44,840 --> 01:02:46,840 Speaker 1: writing a book again. I hate the process, Like it's 1243 01:02:46,880 --> 01:02:50,000 Speaker 1: so stressful, never in life. Um. But I also wanted 1244 01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:52,320 Speaker 1: to be open to different possibilities and opportunities. So we 1245 01:02:52,400 --> 01:02:55,440 Speaker 1: had a few conversations and it was basically like how 1246 01:02:55,480 --> 01:02:58,160 Speaker 1: do I use this format of an accessible, easy to 1247 01:02:58,280 --> 01:03:02,240 Speaker 1: understand lesson then extended into a book forum. And my 1248 01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:04,640 Speaker 1: last two books are about history, and I really actually 1249 01:03:04,640 --> 01:03:06,840 Speaker 1: wanted to write a book about puberty, but I had 1250 01:03:06,880 --> 01:03:08,960 Speaker 1: to put that mac and cheese on the shelf and 1251 01:03:09,120 --> 01:03:11,480 Speaker 1: figure out, Okay, what can I actually do with this? 1252 01:03:12,160 --> 01:03:14,600 Speaker 1: And there were chapters in this book that I didn't 1253 01:03:14,600 --> 01:03:15,800 Speaker 1: want to write, Like I didn't want to write a 1254 01:03:15,920 --> 01:03:18,320 Speaker 1: chapter about relationships. I didn't want to write a chapter 1255 01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:21,680 Speaker 1: about class and classism, but I needed to for it 1256 01:03:21,760 --> 01:03:24,040 Speaker 1: to get the point across. And you're supposed to be 1257 01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:26,360 Speaker 1: as a writer. There's these sayings about, right the things 1258 01:03:26,400 --> 01:03:28,960 Speaker 1: that scare you, and that was definitely the thing that 1259 01:03:29,040 --> 01:03:31,200 Speaker 1: I did. I had to figure out, Okay, what are 1260 01:03:31,240 --> 01:03:33,160 Speaker 1: the things that I can talk about that might be 1261 01:03:33,440 --> 01:03:35,000 Speaker 1: not what I want to talk about, or might not 1262 01:03:35,120 --> 01:03:38,000 Speaker 1: be the forefront of what I am called to do 1263 01:03:38,160 --> 01:03:39,680 Speaker 1: or I feel that I'm called to do, but that 1264 01:03:39,800 --> 01:03:42,440 Speaker 1: need to happen. And a massive part was reaching out 1265 01:03:42,480 --> 01:03:44,520 Speaker 1: and asking for help and working with folks like Dr 1266 01:03:44,560 --> 01:03:47,920 Speaker 1: sha Kill McLane and Dr Chary Spurt and Stelly and 1267 01:03:48,040 --> 01:03:50,520 Speaker 1: feeling in these gaps, and then of course compensating folks. 1268 01:03:50,600 --> 01:03:52,640 Speaker 1: Do you have to compensate people when they're consulting for you. 1269 01:03:52,680 --> 01:03:54,919 Speaker 1: You can't be picking brains And then also talk about 1270 01:03:54,960 --> 01:03:57,480 Speaker 1: that conversation too in the book. And so it's been 1271 01:03:57,520 --> 01:04:00,880 Speaker 1: really a joy. And I just recorded the audio book myself, 1272 01:04:01,240 --> 01:04:03,840 Speaker 1: which was terrifying because I really struggle a reading out loud, 1273 01:04:04,400 --> 01:04:06,720 Speaker 1: and I'm like, this is good, Like I did a 1274 01:04:06,760 --> 01:04:08,360 Speaker 1: good job, and so I'm really proud of myself and 1275 01:04:08,440 --> 01:04:11,200 Speaker 1: excited for it to be in the world. I'm so 1276 01:04:11,440 --> 01:04:15,200 Speaker 1: excited for you when you are bringing people into this 1277 01:04:15,360 --> 01:04:21,320 Speaker 1: conversation about learning in this way about our identities are 1278 01:04:21,400 --> 01:04:24,560 Speaker 1: experiences showing up in the world, the ways to apologize, 1279 01:04:25,000 --> 01:04:27,280 Speaker 1: the ways that things like relationships and so on and 1280 01:04:27,400 --> 01:04:31,720 Speaker 1: so forth affect how we live, and the potential for 1281 01:04:31,840 --> 01:04:35,720 Speaker 1: showing up. It's not lost on me that a lot 1282 01:04:35,840 --> 01:04:42,280 Speaker 1: of that centers around identity and integrity. And there's a 1283 01:04:42,360 --> 01:04:46,840 Speaker 1: lot of people who push back on leaders and people 1284 01:04:46,880 --> 01:04:50,000 Speaker 1: who are advocating for change, and they like to kind 1285 01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:55,240 Speaker 1: of designate everything as identity politics. And you you mentioned 1286 01:04:55,360 --> 01:04:59,280 Speaker 1: this um earlier. You you mentioned the day that you 1287 01:04:59,320 --> 01:05:01,560 Speaker 1: went on Tucker Carlson, and I remember that and I 1288 01:05:01,720 --> 01:05:03,440 Speaker 1: was like, what is she doing? What is happening? Is 1289 01:05:03,520 --> 01:05:06,800 Speaker 1: she going to be okay? And I've obviously watched that interview, 1290 01:05:06,840 --> 01:05:08,600 Speaker 1: as so many people have, and I know you reference 1291 01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:10,480 Speaker 1: it in your Ted talk and he tried to do 1292 01:05:10,600 --> 01:05:13,360 Speaker 1: that to you. He was so dismissive, and he said, oh, 1293 01:05:13,720 --> 01:05:17,240 Speaker 1: you know, identity politics, and he was talking over you, 1294 01:05:17,360 --> 01:05:19,320 Speaker 1: but I still caught your response. You said, it's not 1295 01:05:19,440 --> 01:05:24,840 Speaker 1: identity politics when it's your life. And so I'm really 1296 01:05:25,040 --> 01:05:31,760 Speaker 1: curious how you think through learning, through getting smarter, we 1297 01:05:31,880 --> 01:05:36,480 Speaker 1: can dismantle that very dismissive card that gets flung around 1298 01:05:37,320 --> 01:05:44,160 Speaker 1: and and encourage people to look beneath two people's actual experiences, 1299 01:05:44,360 --> 01:05:47,160 Speaker 1: because it is the experiences and the seeing each other 1300 01:05:47,240 --> 01:05:51,560 Speaker 1: that allows us to be more progressive in everything from 1301 01:05:51,600 --> 01:05:55,880 Speaker 1: our own behavior to policy. Definitely, I think one of 1302 01:05:55,920 --> 01:05:58,440 Speaker 1: the biggest things is I start with identity right at 1303 01:05:58,440 --> 01:06:01,200 Speaker 1: the top of the book. I talk about ourselves and 1304 01:06:01,280 --> 01:06:03,080 Speaker 1: the way that we understand ourselves in the ways that 1305 01:06:03,200 --> 01:06:06,960 Speaker 1: others understand us, in that way we understand others, and 1306 01:06:07,040 --> 01:06:09,680 Speaker 1: all these different dynamics, and it basically coming down to 1307 01:06:09,800 --> 01:06:15,000 Speaker 1: a matter of we have assumptions, and those assumptions matter 1308 01:06:15,480 --> 01:06:17,560 Speaker 1: not because they're true, but because it affects how we 1309 01:06:17,640 --> 01:06:20,080 Speaker 1: treat people, how we understand ourselves, and how we understand 1310 01:06:20,120 --> 01:06:23,480 Speaker 1: each other. And the conversation about identity politics is a 1311 01:06:23,560 --> 01:06:26,120 Speaker 1: necessary one to have when it's when it happens correctly, 1312 01:06:26,400 --> 01:06:28,760 Speaker 1: just like critical race theory is super important to discuss 1313 01:06:28,880 --> 01:06:31,560 Speaker 1: if you understand critical race theory, otherwise it gets into 1314 01:06:31,600 --> 01:06:33,800 Speaker 1: this kind of like mushy mess. But the fact is 1315 01:06:33,880 --> 01:06:38,080 Speaker 1: that our experiences are lived experiences also adders up to expertise, 1316 01:06:38,640 --> 01:06:42,960 Speaker 1: and we have to sometimes put really actually sometimes foreground 1317 01:06:43,000 --> 01:06:44,840 Speaker 1: those things like when somebody says, well, I don't actually 1318 01:06:44,840 --> 01:06:46,840 Speaker 1: need to know this person's race, well, why are you 1319 01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:49,160 Speaker 1: saying that? Is it because it actually doesn't matter? Or 1320 01:06:49,280 --> 01:06:52,040 Speaker 1: is it because if you acknowledge it you might lean 1321 01:06:52,080 --> 01:06:54,880 Speaker 1: into your biases. When somebody says, oh, I don't really 1322 01:06:54,920 --> 01:06:56,960 Speaker 1: care about this person's gender identity or I couldn't care 1323 01:06:57,080 --> 01:07:00,000 Speaker 1: less what your sexual orientation is, is it a genuine 1324 01:07:00,080 --> 01:07:02,080 Speaker 1: message of I'm going to treat you the same regardless, 1325 01:07:02,280 --> 01:07:03,919 Speaker 1: or is it I'm afraid that I'm going to treat 1326 01:07:03,920 --> 01:07:06,680 Speaker 1: you differently if I know this about you. And so 1327 01:07:07,000 --> 01:07:10,160 Speaker 1: it's looking at intention every step of the way, and 1328 01:07:10,280 --> 01:07:14,440 Speaker 1: also just understanding that often the most privileged of identities 1329 01:07:14,760 --> 01:07:18,880 Speaker 1: are the ones that go unnamed and un acknowledged, where 1330 01:07:19,000 --> 01:07:21,960 Speaker 1: we'll say somebody is half black, but we won't say 1331 01:07:22,000 --> 01:07:23,560 Speaker 1: the other half because we already know that other half 1332 01:07:23,640 --> 01:07:26,760 Speaker 1: is white, or somebody who's a white American just gets 1333 01:07:26,760 --> 01:07:28,600 Speaker 1: to be an American, whereas I have to be an 1334 01:07:28,600 --> 01:07:32,680 Speaker 1: African American. And Tony Morrison said that in the United States, 1335 01:07:33,120 --> 01:07:35,840 Speaker 1: American means white and everybody else has to hyphenate. And 1336 01:07:35,920 --> 01:07:39,640 Speaker 1: so it's understanding that when identities aren't named, it's because 1337 01:07:39,720 --> 01:07:42,720 Speaker 1: those are the dominant identities, and because systems of oppression 1338 01:07:42,760 --> 01:07:46,040 Speaker 1: allow those identities to go unnamed and unacknowledged, and that's 1339 01:07:46,080 --> 01:07:48,160 Speaker 1: the system of power and the system of oppression that 1340 01:07:48,200 --> 01:07:50,280 Speaker 1: has to be dismantled. So in the book, I talk 1341 01:07:50,320 --> 01:07:54,560 Speaker 1: about racialized people and white people because as while white 1342 01:07:54,680 --> 01:07:57,440 Speaker 1: is also racialized identity, it's important for us to specifically 1343 01:07:57,520 --> 01:08:00,320 Speaker 1: named white because that comes with a degree of power 1344 01:08:00,400 --> 01:08:03,200 Speaker 1: and privilege in a system of white supremacy. So it's 1345 01:08:03,360 --> 01:08:07,400 Speaker 1: undoing the things that we claim to be uncomfortable with, 1346 01:08:08,440 --> 01:08:11,320 Speaker 1: Like I'm sure that folks like Tucker Carlson would be 1347 01:08:11,400 --> 01:08:14,520 Speaker 1: very uncomfortable being known as a straight cis white man. 1348 01:08:15,920 --> 01:08:18,800 Speaker 1: But those are facts. So basically, the whole core of 1349 01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:21,320 Speaker 1: it is that over the past six hundred years, race 1350 01:08:21,400 --> 01:08:24,640 Speaker 1: has been invented very gradually, and a massive part of 1351 01:08:24,720 --> 01:08:29,600 Speaker 1: that has been this unacknowledged fact that oftentimes when we 1352 01:08:29,680 --> 01:08:33,600 Speaker 1: say human being, we mean white person. We don't necessarily 1353 01:08:33,680 --> 01:08:35,840 Speaker 1: mean other aspects. And that's evidenced by the fact that 1354 01:08:35,920 --> 01:08:38,599 Speaker 1: we say people and then we say people of color 1355 01:08:39,040 --> 01:08:42,280 Speaker 1: when we're talking about different racialized people, or we say 1356 01:08:42,439 --> 01:08:44,759 Speaker 1: l g B t Q plus, but we're not necessarily 1357 01:08:44,800 --> 01:08:47,360 Speaker 1: talking about the straight and sis gender community. And we 1358 01:08:47,479 --> 01:08:50,080 Speaker 1: force people to come out instead of acknowledging the fact 1359 01:08:50,160 --> 01:08:52,760 Speaker 1: that we assume that everybody is straight and sis gender 1360 01:08:52,840 --> 01:08:55,400 Speaker 1: unless they say otherwise, and then we put the responsibility 1361 01:08:55,479 --> 01:08:58,080 Speaker 1: on them to do that, instead of putting the responsibility 1362 01:08:58,120 --> 01:09:00,960 Speaker 1: on us not to assume those things. And those are 1363 01:09:01,120 --> 01:09:03,920 Speaker 1: the conversations around identity that have to happen that I 1364 01:09:04,040 --> 01:09:06,280 Speaker 1: go into great detail in when in my book. So 1365 01:09:06,400 --> 01:09:08,280 Speaker 1: that way, we have to understand ourselves. We can't think 1366 01:09:08,320 --> 01:09:10,840 Speaker 1: of ourselves as blank slates just because we're closer to 1367 01:09:10,920 --> 01:09:13,800 Speaker 1: privilege or closer to a system of dominance. We have 1368 01:09:13,880 --> 01:09:16,679 Speaker 1: to understand that we also have identities, that we also 1369 01:09:16,720 --> 01:09:19,640 Speaker 1: have connections not only to systems of oppression, but of 1370 01:09:19,840 --> 01:09:23,040 Speaker 1: power and of privilege. And while that might be uncomfortable 1371 01:09:23,080 --> 01:09:26,559 Speaker 1: to acknowledge, it's necessary for us to get absolutely anywhere. 1372 01:09:27,360 --> 01:09:32,640 Speaker 1: M H. And I think to be willing to interrogate 1373 01:09:34,200 --> 01:09:37,760 Speaker 1: what we haven't known, what we're learning, and also what 1374 01:09:37,960 --> 01:09:40,880 Speaker 1: we might assume about ourselves. Something that I thought was 1375 01:09:40,960 --> 01:09:46,360 Speaker 1: so powerful years ago, um, when we were looking at 1376 01:09:46,840 --> 01:09:50,040 Speaker 1: you know, Donald Trump running for president and going, there's 1377 01:09:50,080 --> 01:09:53,600 Speaker 1: no way that this can't happen, right, Something that I 1378 01:09:53,720 --> 01:09:57,320 Speaker 1: found to be one of the more impactful statements anybody 1379 01:09:57,439 --> 01:10:01,519 Speaker 1: made that year. Brittany pack Nick Ningham was talking about 1380 01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:04,639 Speaker 1: proximity to white supremacy and she specifically called out white 1381 01:10:04,640 --> 01:10:07,719 Speaker 1: women and was like, ladies, white supremacy doesn't have anything 1382 01:10:07,800 --> 01:10:12,000 Speaker 1: for you either, and and it has been, uh, such 1383 01:10:12,080 --> 01:10:16,680 Speaker 1: a drumbeat. It was such a concise way to just 1384 01:10:16,800 --> 01:10:20,000 Speaker 1: state the ultimate truth. And I am a long winded person, 1385 01:10:20,120 --> 01:10:23,120 Speaker 1: so when someone who I respect does something in a 1386 01:10:23,240 --> 01:10:24,880 Speaker 1: short form, I'm like, there it is. I have to 1387 01:10:24,920 --> 01:10:29,680 Speaker 1: talk about this forever. And I really I have never 1388 01:10:29,760 --> 01:10:33,480 Speaker 1: stopped thinking about that, about how, whether it's conscious or unconscious, 1389 01:10:33,960 --> 01:10:36,719 Speaker 1: any of us who might be close to any system 1390 01:10:37,520 --> 01:10:40,519 Speaker 1: that makes us feel safe, because that's what power it's about. 1391 01:10:40,840 --> 01:10:43,040 Speaker 1: It's about, Oh, if you have this, you'll be safe. 1392 01:10:44,120 --> 01:10:51,000 Speaker 1: And what does our deep desire, our our evolutionary reality, 1393 01:10:51,479 --> 01:10:54,920 Speaker 1: you know, from back when we were all foragers, our 1394 01:10:55,000 --> 01:10:58,920 Speaker 1: deep desire for safety. In what ways will that allow 1395 01:10:59,120 --> 01:11:03,120 Speaker 1: us to conte or unconsciously ignore or turn away from 1396 01:11:03,560 --> 01:11:07,920 Speaker 1: the lack of safety other people are experiencing. How how 1397 01:11:08,040 --> 01:11:10,640 Speaker 1: can we really look at each other and say, if 1398 01:11:10,640 --> 01:11:12,760 Speaker 1: it's happening to you, it could happen to me, and 1399 01:11:12,960 --> 01:11:15,280 Speaker 1: vice versa. So let's show up to solve this together. 1400 01:11:15,760 --> 01:11:18,120 Speaker 1: And also, I think what's necessary is that it might 1401 01:11:18,240 --> 01:11:20,880 Speaker 1: never happen to me, and I should still care. I 1402 01:11:20,960 --> 01:11:23,920 Speaker 1: think that a good litmus test is is my feminism 1403 01:11:24,040 --> 01:11:26,320 Speaker 1: that I want to own half the plantation or that 1404 01:11:26,400 --> 01:11:29,000 Speaker 1: I want the plantation to not exist, and I want 1405 01:11:29,040 --> 01:11:31,519 Speaker 1: to free the enslaved people that should never been in bondage. 1406 01:11:31,840 --> 01:11:33,640 Speaker 1: And I think that's the crux of white feminism is 1407 01:11:33,680 --> 01:11:35,280 Speaker 1: that for a lot of people, they're concerned about owning 1408 01:11:35,320 --> 01:11:38,840 Speaker 1: half of plantation, owning halfy enslaved people, owning half of 1409 01:11:38,880 --> 01:11:42,080 Speaker 1: the tools of oppression. For other people, it's what are 1410 01:11:42,120 --> 01:11:45,719 Speaker 1: we gonna do when we replace the Mount Rushmore heads 1411 01:11:45,800 --> 01:11:50,600 Speaker 1: with suffragettes instead of it being let's not deface indigenous 1412 01:11:50,680 --> 01:11:54,360 Speaker 1: land and give land back instead? And so I think 1413 01:11:54,400 --> 01:11:58,320 Speaker 1: it's sometimes us looking at what must I give up 1414 01:11:58,520 --> 01:12:00,160 Speaker 1: and what am I willing to give up so that 1415 01:12:00,240 --> 01:12:04,000 Speaker 1: other people can thrive. I mean, you have the example 1416 01:12:04,040 --> 01:12:05,800 Speaker 1: I was just talking about this with my friends that 1417 01:12:06,000 --> 01:12:08,679 Speaker 1: for the second Matrix movie to happen, that KIANU Reeves 1418 01:12:08,760 --> 01:12:11,440 Speaker 1: gave up a huge bit of his paycheck. That's socialism, 1419 01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:13,200 Speaker 1: and also how the film was able to get made, 1420 01:12:13,320 --> 01:12:15,160 Speaker 1: Like you know, we all love good guy Kiana Reeves, 1421 01:12:15,400 --> 01:12:18,080 Speaker 1: but it's those things that must take place. And I 1422 01:12:18,160 --> 01:12:20,519 Speaker 1: think that sometimes it's this need for safety, right, but 1423 01:12:20,640 --> 01:12:23,920 Speaker 1: also acknowledging that sometimes that safety is an illusion. I 1424 01:12:24,000 --> 01:12:25,960 Speaker 1: think about folks like my friends in Brooklyn who live 1425 01:12:26,040 --> 01:12:28,880 Speaker 1: really close to a police station, and how they realize, actually, 1426 01:12:29,040 --> 01:12:31,760 Speaker 1: I don't feel safe being in this close proximity to 1427 01:12:31,840 --> 01:12:34,599 Speaker 1: such an impressive institution, even though when we moved here 1428 01:12:34,680 --> 01:12:36,920 Speaker 1: two years ago we did feel very comfortable with this 1429 01:12:37,479 --> 01:12:40,280 Speaker 1: and just evaluating what safety means. I think about the 1430 01:12:40,360 --> 01:12:43,880 Speaker 1: women who uh and pardon me, like I shouldn't just 1431 01:12:43,920 --> 01:12:45,880 Speaker 1: say women, I should say people with you know, who 1432 01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:48,880 Speaker 1: need access to abortion, which is across gender, because, as 1433 01:12:49,120 --> 01:12:51,920 Speaker 1: Erica Hart says, abortion has no gender, and people of 1434 01:12:51,920 --> 01:12:54,479 Speaker 1: any gender can get an abortion, who have never had 1435 01:12:54,560 --> 01:12:57,280 Speaker 1: access to the promises in ro Versus Wade, my friends 1436 01:12:57,320 --> 01:12:59,200 Speaker 1: who have had to drive to Florida to get an abortion, 1437 01:12:59,800 --> 01:13:03,320 Speaker 1: that reality which has existed with Row in place, who 1438 01:13:03,479 --> 01:13:05,720 Speaker 1: are now having that eroded even further. And I think 1439 01:13:05,720 --> 01:13:08,240 Speaker 1: about folks who will always have access to health care 1440 01:13:08,320 --> 01:13:12,320 Speaker 1: because they're wealthy, feeling the sense of alarm, and sometimes 1441 01:13:12,439 --> 01:13:14,080 Speaker 1: we need to step into those emotions, like we were 1442 01:13:14,120 --> 01:13:16,479 Speaker 1: saying before, in order to have that compassion. But we 1443 01:13:16,560 --> 01:13:18,800 Speaker 1: also need to understand that it's not a matter of 1444 01:13:18,840 --> 01:13:20,840 Speaker 1: whether or not a threat as on our doorstep, for 1445 01:13:20,960 --> 01:13:22,640 Speaker 1: us to acknowledge that it's a threat and for us 1446 01:13:22,680 --> 01:13:25,280 Speaker 1: to make a difference. But when Trump became president that 1447 01:13:25,400 --> 01:13:27,960 Speaker 1: was so bewildering. The other part that was bewildering was 1448 01:13:28,040 --> 01:13:33,080 Speaker 1: that it went from don't talk about this toward marginalized people, 1449 01:13:33,520 --> 01:13:35,600 Speaker 1: and then the next day it was why haven't you 1450 01:13:35,640 --> 01:13:38,519 Speaker 1: warned us? And I felt similarly with this racial awakening, 1451 01:13:38,880 --> 01:13:41,960 Speaker 1: where it was like, don't talk about this, Oh snap, 1452 01:13:42,000 --> 01:13:44,200 Speaker 1: why didn't you warn us? And then again January six, 1453 01:13:44,920 --> 01:13:47,000 Speaker 1: don't talk about this? Why didn't you warn us? And 1454 01:13:47,080 --> 01:13:49,800 Speaker 1: then again with the Haitian immigrants and the move that 1455 01:13:49,840 --> 01:13:51,840 Speaker 1: the United States decides to make, which is that no, 1456 01:13:52,000 --> 01:13:54,120 Speaker 1: we weren't using whips and we'll just stop using horses, 1457 01:13:54,160 --> 01:13:57,599 Speaker 1: instead of it being why are you removing people who 1458 01:13:57,640 --> 01:14:00,879 Speaker 1: are refugees and asylum seekers and we're doing these policies 1459 01:14:00,920 --> 01:14:03,120 Speaker 1: from the Trump era that you campaigned against Joe Biden 1460 01:14:03,720 --> 01:14:07,320 Speaker 1: when you need to be overturning them, don't talk about this? 1461 01:14:08,040 --> 01:14:10,519 Speaker 1: Why didn't you warn us about him? And it's this 1462 01:14:10,600 --> 01:14:13,679 Speaker 1: perpetual gas letting that I think marginalized people experience where 1463 01:14:13,760 --> 01:14:17,040 Speaker 1: every I say, like every eight ten weeks, White America 1464 01:14:17,280 --> 01:14:18,880 Speaker 1: is upset that we haven't warned them about something that 1465 01:14:18,880 --> 01:14:21,600 Speaker 1: we've been screaming our heads off about. And so I 1466 01:14:21,760 --> 01:14:25,280 Speaker 1: have to just stay committed to hoping that I'm activating 1467 01:14:25,320 --> 01:14:29,479 Speaker 1: the people who care and making those resources available, even 1468 01:14:29,560 --> 01:14:32,680 Speaker 1: things like folks having an increased concern about missing and 1469 01:14:32,800 --> 01:14:35,479 Speaker 1: murdered Indigenous women, where I had one of my followers 1470 01:14:35,520 --> 01:14:37,240 Speaker 1: reached out and say, Blair, why haven't you spoke about this? 1471 01:14:37,320 --> 01:14:39,599 Speaker 1: And I'm like, actually, here's the six times I've spoken 1472 01:14:39,600 --> 01:14:43,080 Speaker 1: about this this year. But making those resources available so 1473 01:14:43,240 --> 01:14:47,360 Speaker 1: that whatever point people decide that they need to be activated, 1474 01:14:47,640 --> 01:14:50,280 Speaker 1: that there's a ladder for that, but also being patient 1475 01:14:50,360 --> 01:14:52,519 Speaker 1: with myself and encouraging others to be patient that it 1476 01:14:52,720 --> 01:14:56,200 Speaker 1: is immensely frustrating to feel like you're only called upon 1477 01:14:56,240 --> 01:14:59,000 Speaker 1: in moments of crisis to acknowledge that, to name it, 1478 01:14:59,400 --> 01:15:02,519 Speaker 1: but also to you really like hold together. Another thing 1479 01:15:02,600 --> 01:15:05,120 Speaker 1: that Britney told me, which was that you had a 1480 01:15:05,200 --> 01:15:09,560 Speaker 1: purpose before anybody had an opinion. And sometimes whether that 1481 01:15:09,600 --> 01:15:11,760 Speaker 1: opinion is to listen to you or not, or whether 1482 01:15:11,880 --> 01:15:13,600 Speaker 1: you have something to say that's worthy or not, or 1483 01:15:13,680 --> 01:15:16,280 Speaker 1: that you matter or not, you have a purpose regardless 1484 01:15:16,280 --> 01:15:20,000 Speaker 1: of what another person's opinion is. Yeah, and I think 1485 01:15:20,080 --> 01:15:22,960 Speaker 1: everyone deserves to claim that and know that. And to 1486 01:15:23,120 --> 01:15:27,000 Speaker 1: your point, wherever people are on their journey of awakening 1487 01:15:27,080 --> 01:15:30,160 Speaker 1: to community, whether it's oh my god, if this could 1488 01:15:30,160 --> 01:15:31,519 Speaker 1: happen to me and it could happen to you, we 1489 01:15:31,600 --> 01:15:34,880 Speaker 1: have to solve this or you're further along where you say, 1490 01:15:35,600 --> 01:15:38,840 Speaker 1: regardless of what my personal experience of safety is, this 1491 01:15:39,000 --> 01:15:42,679 Speaker 1: happening anywhere is unacceptable. That should always be the goal, 1492 01:15:43,240 --> 01:15:46,200 Speaker 1: you know. I think about it in terms of it's 1493 01:15:46,240 --> 01:15:49,160 Speaker 1: funny because I get asked when I advocate for changes 1494 01:15:49,200 --> 01:15:51,599 Speaker 1: in our budget, because to me, listen a national budget 1495 01:15:51,680 --> 01:15:53,960 Speaker 1: is just a spelling out of priorities. And when you 1496 01:15:54,000 --> 01:15:55,960 Speaker 1: look at how much this country invests in a war 1497 01:15:56,080 --> 01:15:59,160 Speaker 1: machine and how little we invest in keeping people healthy, 1498 01:15:59,560 --> 01:16:01,519 Speaker 1: that to me signals that we have a priority that's 1499 01:16:01,600 --> 01:16:05,040 Speaker 1: very out of balance. And when people say to me, well, 1500 01:16:05,080 --> 01:16:06,560 Speaker 1: you don't know anything about it and this, that and 1501 01:16:06,600 --> 01:16:08,200 Speaker 1: the other, I say, no, No, I know a lot 1502 01:16:08,240 --> 01:16:10,479 Speaker 1: about budgets. The reason that so many people in my 1503 01:16:10,600 --> 01:16:14,960 Speaker 1: industry are such staunch advocates of unions, of universal health care, 1504 01:16:15,439 --> 01:16:20,320 Speaker 1: and of fair distribution and investment of resources is because 1505 01:16:20,520 --> 01:16:24,720 Speaker 1: that's what we do. I invest fifty percent of my 1506 01:16:24,920 --> 01:16:28,160 Speaker 1: personal resources back into the people on my team, and 1507 01:16:28,280 --> 01:16:33,640 Speaker 1: another back into workers who work part time for me 1508 01:16:33,800 --> 01:16:36,760 Speaker 1: all year, you know, the artists and the stylists and 1509 01:16:36,800 --> 01:16:42,360 Speaker 1: the teams. And then I invest another back into our 1510 01:16:42,560 --> 01:16:45,639 Speaker 1: country in my taxes. And but to me this feels 1511 01:16:45,680 --> 01:16:47,680 Speaker 1: important because people will say, yo, well you can pay 1512 01:16:47,680 --> 01:16:50,880 Speaker 1: out all that money because because you make money. No. No, 1513 01:16:51,200 --> 01:16:54,200 Speaker 1: this is about participating in the profit you create, and 1514 01:16:54,320 --> 01:16:57,240 Speaker 1: so many workers are denied that ability. So I'm fine 1515 01:16:58,000 --> 01:17:04,560 Speaker 1: living on of my entertainment companies gross income because it 1516 01:17:04,680 --> 01:17:09,080 Speaker 1: means everybody eats when I do well, everybody I work with, 1517 01:17:09,160 --> 01:17:12,080 Speaker 1: and everybody on my team does well, and it's possible 1518 01:17:12,160 --> 01:17:13,920 Speaker 1: for our country because let me tell you what, as 1519 01:17:14,000 --> 01:17:15,960 Speaker 1: much as I would love to be one of the 1520 01:17:16,240 --> 01:17:18,040 Speaker 1: icons who we look up to, like a queen of 1521 01:17:18,200 --> 01:17:21,439 Speaker 1: entertainment like Jail or Beyonce who just is like breaking 1522 01:17:21,479 --> 01:17:25,000 Speaker 1: it in, I'm not, but the United States government is. 1523 01:17:25,640 --> 01:17:28,320 Speaker 1: And when I look at how much available money we have, 1524 01:17:28,520 --> 01:17:31,280 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, we have the money, we just don't 1525 01:17:31,320 --> 01:17:35,000 Speaker 1: want to invest it in each other for whatever ridiculous 1526 01:17:35,080 --> 01:17:38,000 Speaker 1: reason and whatever folks like Mitch McConnell or in power 1527 01:17:38,080 --> 01:17:41,600 Speaker 1: and just want to, you know, get kickbacks from corporations. 1528 01:17:42,600 --> 01:17:46,519 Speaker 1: We have the ability, we have the resources, and we 1529 01:17:46,720 --> 01:17:51,759 Speaker 1: do have the mental acuity to envision and financially create 1530 01:17:52,200 --> 01:17:54,280 Speaker 1: a better future for all of us, but we don't 1531 01:17:54,320 --> 01:17:59,320 Speaker 1: have the conscience. But you're helping us get that conscience. 1532 01:17:59,760 --> 01:18:04,800 Speaker 1: You're helping so many people see the truth of things 1533 01:18:05,080 --> 01:18:09,360 Speaker 1: and and get smarter about what's possible. And I'm just 1534 01:18:10,400 --> 01:18:12,439 Speaker 1: I know that you and I are in our own 1535 01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:14,600 Speaker 1: ways like beating the same drum, But I am just 1536 01:18:14,760 --> 01:18:19,519 Speaker 1: so grateful that you ay have taken this time today 1537 01:18:19,680 --> 01:18:23,400 Speaker 1: be are using your gifts. You know that that you're 1538 01:18:23,479 --> 01:18:26,840 Speaker 1: constantly filling the pot luck with what only you can bring, 1539 01:18:26,960 --> 01:18:30,160 Speaker 1: and that you are welcoming people to these conversations to 1540 01:18:30,240 --> 01:18:35,680 Speaker 1: be thoughtful about language and behavior and also to give 1541 01:18:35,720 --> 01:18:40,120 Speaker 1: them steps to grow into deeper and deeper understanding, because 1542 01:18:40,160 --> 01:18:42,840 Speaker 1: we have to give people permission to do that, to say, 1543 01:18:42,880 --> 01:18:45,320 Speaker 1: it's okay if you don't know everything, nobody really does. 1544 01:18:45,880 --> 01:18:47,560 Speaker 1: I might know a little more about this than you. 1545 01:18:47,760 --> 01:18:50,519 Speaker 1: Here's another thing to think about. Here's another place for 1546 01:18:50,640 --> 01:18:52,880 Speaker 1: you to to come and meet and be held and 1547 01:18:53,000 --> 01:18:56,120 Speaker 1: be seen and and show up. Thank you so much. 1548 01:18:56,200 --> 01:18:57,840 Speaker 1: And I was just so excited and you're just talking 1549 01:18:57,840 --> 01:18:59,599 Speaker 1: about it because I talk about this in my book. 1550 01:18:59,600 --> 01:19:03,639 Speaker 1: I talk about jama which is the African ideology about 1551 01:19:03,760 --> 01:19:07,400 Speaker 1: shared resources. Before we were talking about relationships. That's UBUNTU, 1552 01:19:07,520 --> 01:19:10,240 Speaker 1: which is mutual respect and humanity towards others. Then we 1553 01:19:10,320 --> 01:19:13,559 Speaker 1: have Jamaa, which is about acknowledging that we can't thrive 1554 01:19:13,640 --> 01:19:16,240 Speaker 1: together unless we are sharing resources. That some people have 1555 01:19:16,400 --> 01:19:19,479 Speaker 1: way too much and other people's can't even live because 1556 01:19:19,479 --> 01:19:21,840 Speaker 1: they don't have enough. And it's just so cool to 1557 01:19:21,880 --> 01:19:24,920 Speaker 1: see it, like beating that drum in different ways, and 1558 01:19:25,280 --> 01:19:26,800 Speaker 1: it's just such an honor and such an exciting, like 1559 01:19:26,840 --> 01:19:28,680 Speaker 1: privilege to be able to do it every single day. 1560 01:19:29,240 --> 01:19:32,000 Speaker 1: And I think that the ultimate goal of read this 1561 01:19:32,080 --> 01:19:35,320 Speaker 1: to get smarter isn't to provide solutions, but hopefully give 1562 01:19:35,400 --> 01:19:38,960 Speaker 1: people the vocabulary, the historical context in the language to 1563 01:19:39,040 --> 01:19:42,080 Speaker 1: be able to move that needle those six ticks forward 1564 01:19:42,200 --> 01:19:45,720 Speaker 1: instead of those five that our previous generation did. So 1565 01:19:46,400 --> 01:19:49,880 Speaker 1: my very favorite question to ask every single person who 1566 01:19:50,040 --> 01:19:52,920 Speaker 1: comes on this show, and I'm really so excited to 1567 01:19:53,040 --> 01:19:56,920 Speaker 1: hear your answer, is, Blair, what feels like a work 1568 01:19:56,960 --> 01:19:59,880 Speaker 1: in progress in your life right now? Who? I think 1569 01:20:00,040 --> 01:20:02,920 Speaker 1: that my work in progress is my mental health and 1570 01:20:03,040 --> 01:20:05,840 Speaker 1: really trying to get into a great place. I think 1571 01:20:05,880 --> 01:20:08,120 Speaker 1: that as somebody who's like kind of in the business 1572 01:20:08,200 --> 01:20:10,920 Speaker 1: of trying to help other folks improve themselves, I can 1573 01:20:11,040 --> 01:20:14,360 Speaker 1: sometimes neglect myself and so I'm trying to pour back 1574 01:20:14,400 --> 01:20:16,639 Speaker 1: into my cup so that way I have more to give. 1575 01:20:16,880 --> 01:20:19,280 Speaker 1: But if you're empty, you have nothing to give. So 1576 01:20:19,400 --> 01:20:22,040 Speaker 1: that's an ongoing process and it's a very vulnerable process. 1577 01:20:22,240 --> 01:20:24,680 Speaker 1: But as I go through it, I just know that 1578 01:20:24,760 --> 01:20:27,439 Speaker 1: it's an investment that I'm making in myself, that that 1579 01:20:27,560 --> 01:20:32,360 Speaker 1: I deserve and that I need, and that it's okay 1580 01:20:32,479 --> 01:20:35,040 Speaker 1: for me to need things from myself, and that's the 1581 01:20:35,120 --> 01:20:38,200 Speaker 1: work in progress that I'm going through right now. Thank you, 1582 01:21:33,000 --> 01:21:33,120 Speaker 1: un